#that definitely makes her the future graduate and not someone else with her name! ;D

[britishchick09]

the tall man :)

@robert-273-fan

[insideoutstory]

1986 is Batshit

Eddie Munson x FOC x Steve Harrington

summary: Patching up Steve in the Upside Down, Eddie feels like this whole thing is a hallucination. Maybe he’s the one with rabies.

warnings: fluff, blood, descriptions of steve’s injuries as displayed in 4.07, established Steve x OC, implied polyamory

A/N: A future look into the fourth installment of Inside Out. I was hoarding this for myself as a test scene, but everyone has Eddie feels and a few people have asked. First installment is complete with second installment in progress! 

[ Incidentally my OC is also named Christine so...if you’re new here, sorry lol ]

-----

It was supposed to be his year. 

The moment the clock struck midnight on New Year’s Eve, Eddie Munson had known it was his year: 1986. This was the year it worked out. This was the year that everything changed. Instead—well, no—not instead. It wasn’t like he was wrong. Things had definitely changed, and they were definitely changed forever and fucking always; it just wasn’t the change he’d been angling for. 

This year—his third senior year—was supposed to be the year that he graduated and left the shithole that was Hawkins, Indiana behind. He’d scrape by in his classes, run the most badass D&D campaign the school had ever or would ever see, play a few shows with his band, and maybe—just maybe—see a little action outside of his right hand. He wasn’t looking to lock himself into a relationship or anything, but it would be nice to get some attention from someone who wasn’t angling for a discount on their drugs. 

Maybe that was his downfall. He should’ve known it was too good to be true when Chrissy Fucking Cunningham asked to come by his place after the game. She’d been sweet, she’d been nice, she’d been fucking gold—right up until she’d levitated into the air and had her eyes sucked out. 

He’d wished that things were going to change, but if he’d known that “change” meant being suspected of murder, going on the lam, being traumatized by spell-casting monsters from another dimension, and then diving headfirst into that dimension with the weirdest bunch of ragtag teens he could be pressed to imagine… 

Yeah, maybe he wouldn’t have wished so hard. 

“Shit, fuck, motherfucking shit—” 

“Eddie,” Robin hissed, “less cursing, more running!” 

She passed him, diving headlong into the dark, spooky trees that made up the dark, spooky forest and leaping over the dark, spooky tendrils of creeping vines on the ground. Eddie gracelessly jumped over another just as it wiggled, making him squeal another curse and pick up the pace. The whole thing was a fucking nightmare. 

He brought up the rear of the group, letting everyone else make the important decisions like where to run, when to hide, and what they were gonna do next. He didn’t feel qualified to make any of those calls. Then again, if you’d asked him yesterday, he wouldn’t feel like any of his companions were qualified either. 

Robin Buckley: a kindred weirdo, hypothetically. She was at the opposite end of the band kid spectrum, with her trumpet and dorky marching band uniform. She didn’t exactly conform, but even Eddie knew she was an oddball, no matter how smart she was. 

Nancy Wheeler: a certified princess at Hawkins High. She wasn’t the same kind of popular as Chrissy Cunningham—Nancy ran the newspaper instead of the cheer squad—but she was still an all-star, extra-curricular, brown-nosing prep, dressed head to toe in pink and frills. 

Steve Harrington: somehow even worse. Eddie had always seen him as the epitome of a washed-up jock, an airhead who’d staked through high school on nothing but his good looks and charisma, then gone on to work a boring retail job where he had no prospects and no future. 

Christine Walcott: a total nerd, which…wasn’t really an insult, coming from Eddie. Christine was alright. After he’d recruited Henderson for Hellfire, befriending her had come naturally. At the very least, he respected the shit out of her. He knew that she was smart, tough, hard to scare. She’d even put Billy Hargrove in the hospital, if the rumors were true. Of the five of them, Eddie imagined Christine as the best candidate to handle the situation—fighting monsters, solving mysteries, saving the world—but somehow, here he was marching right behind her. 

 Eddie “The Freak” Munson: outcast, drug dealer, and weirdo extraordinaire. He drove a piece of crap van and was one bad grade away from becoming a high school dropout, his only talents playing the guitar, rolling a solid joint, and running away from his problems. He was getting real good at that. 

Even so, he was the last person to reach Skull Rock—or whatever he was supposed to call the version of Skull Rock in this parallel dimension. The others were standing in a circle, already deep in conversation about things he could barely comprehend. 

“I don’t like this,” Nancy was saying as she shook her head. “Why wouldn’t they just attack us?” 

“Excuse me?” Steve wheezed on Eddie’s right, hands clutching the gaping wound in his side where he’d been bitten. “You’re joking, right? Tell me you’re joking.” 

“No, she’s right,” Christine said from Steve’s other side. “The first wave attacked us, but the second—they were just sitting there in front of the gate. They easily could have finished us off, but instead it’s like—like they were just trying to stop us from leaving.” 

“Is that really bad?” Eddie asked. “Because like—that sounds really fucking bad.” 

“Well, they’re a hive mind,” Robin offered. “You said the Demodogs would listen to the Mind Flayer right? So if the—the Demobats or whatever called off their attack—” 

“Then someone told them to,” Nancy finished, nodding along. “Someone like Vecna.” 

“Which means he knows we’re here,” Christine added, “and he doesn’t want anyone killing us before he gets to us himself.” 

“Great,” scoffed Steve. “That’s real comforting. Thanks.” 

Eddie gulped, swallowing a pitiful whimper of cowardice. He should’ve stayed in the fucking boat. At least being arrested had a higher survival rate than rabies from mutated bat attacks. 

“Okay, one thing at a time.” Nancy shook her head again and Eddie could practically see her step into manager-mode. “We can only hide here for so long, and we’re going to need supplies: weapons, first aid—” 

“Hi, can we skip to the part where we find another way out?” Robin asked. 

 “We don’t know if there is another way out.” 

“But we can find out. We can do the compass thing like Dustin, right, Chrissy?” 

“Sure, if we had a compass.” 

“I thought you did have a compass.” 

“Yeah, Robin, in my bag, which I left on the boat when I dove into the lake!” 

“…well, that seems like an oversight.” 

“Robin, I swear to God—” 

The argument ended abruptly as Steve’s legs buckled. Eddie and Christine both dove to catch him, each grabbing one arm to keep him upright. Steve swayed heavily on his bare feet, barely able to keep his eyes open even as he complained. 

“M’fine. Sorry, I—it’s fine—” 

“Shut up, Steve,” Christine snapped. “Eddie—” 

“Yeah, I got him.” 

Together they hauled Steve across the clearing, towing him toward the rocks where he could sit down and catch his breath. He groaned as he leaned against the largest boulder and Christine began to fret over his wounds. Eddie tried to scoot back to give them some privacy, but in the cave-like alcove of Skull Rock, there wasn’t a lot of space. He sat back on his heels as Christine ghosted her hands over Harrington’s chest, slick with sweat, lake water, and blood. 

“Huh,” Steve mumbled, his eyes closed, but his lips tugging into a smirk. “Déjà vu, huh?” 

Christine glared at him. “No. You weren’t bleeding out last time.” “Yeah, but I was definitely shirtless.” 

Eddie wrinkled his nose and scooted a few feet further away. “Gross, dude.” 

“Sorry,” Christine apologized on his behalf. “He gets like this when he’s scared.” 

“I’m not scared,” Steve argued. “Seriously, Chris, I’m fine. I just needed to—ow! Ow, ow, ow—” 

“Sorry!” 

 He hissed in pain as her fingers brushed his side, where he’d gotten the brunt of the bites. Even at a distance, Eddie could tell that it was far from fine. More than bite marks, Steve had gouges of flesh missing from his abdomen, small chunks ripped away by tiny fangs. The bleeding was slowing down, but Eddie had a feeling that wasn’t as promising as it should have been; he’d already lost a lot of blood. 

Christine peeled off her flannel shirt, hurriedly folding it into a long strip. “Eddie, can you lift him up?” 

“Huh? Oh—yeah, I—sure.” 

He crawled over to Harrington’s side, reached out, then hesitated and pulled his hand back. His eyes darted from spot to spot, trying to figure out the best way to grab him without making things worse, his fingers twitching anxiously through the air. 

“Dude, I’m fine,” Steve insisted. His eyes were still clenched closed, but he lifted his right arm and sat up as much as he could. “I don’t need—” 

“Steve,” Christine repeated sternly. “Shut up.” 

Eddie cocked his head to the side with an uneasy laugh. “You heard her, man.” 

He pulled Steve’s arm around his shoulders, then slipped his own arm behind Steve’s back, taking care not to aggravate the harsh scratches where he’d been dragged across the ground. He eased Steve up to his knees, trying to support the bulk of his weight without actually having to touch him. Steve didn’t seem to have that problem. His fingers dug into Eddie’s shoulder, his other hand clutching at Eddie’s to keep him balanced. 

Christine knelt in front of them, looking up with hesitant eyes. “You ready?” 

“Yeah,” Steve said through clenched teeth. “Yeah, just do it.” 

She bit her lip, but obliged. Gently as she could, she pressed the thickest folds of the fabric against Steve’s side, then wrapped her arms around him to tie it. Steve let out a low groan, tipping his head back to hide the way his face screwed up in pain. Eddie squeezed his hand in his best attempt at support. 

“You good, dude?” 

“Super,” Steve said breathlessly. “I’m—yup, good.” 

He let go of Eddie’s hand to push his hair out of his face. Eddie made sure to keep watching him, monitoring his face for signs of discomfort as Christine rushed to tie off the cuffs of the shirt. She tucked the last few inches of sleeve into the band of Steve’s pants, then gently patted him on the chest. 

“Okay, done. You did good. It’s okay.” 

The words caused Steve to sag in Eddie’s grip, and he quickly lowered them both back to the ground. Eddie slipped his arms from Steve’s torso and wiped his hands on his ripped jeans, trying to erase the feeling of Steve’s sweat. Then, at a loss, he reached out to ruffle Steve’s hair. 

“Chin up, Harrington. You made it.” 

Steve tried to smack Eddie’s hand away, but the response was so sluggish that he missed completely. 

“Munson, you touch my hair again, I bite your head off next.” 

Eddie snorted and moved to sit against the opposite wall. Christine was still lingering in front of Steve, her fingers tracing through the patch of hair on his chest, unable to meet his eye. Eddie knew he should probably get up and move, give them a little bit of privacy, but before he could summon the energy, Christine was whispering. 

“Just hang on a little longer, okay?” she told Steve in a soothing voice. “We’ll figure this out and…and we’ll get you back.” 

“I know you will.” Steve gave her a soft smile. “Seriously, Chris. I’m not worried. I’m fi—” 

“Don’t say you’re fine. Because if—if you say you’re fine and then you’re not fine, I—Steve, I can’t do that.” 

“Now you sound like Max.” 

“Well…what if she’s right?” Her voice broke as she finally looked up at Steve. “We’ve been fighting this thing for years, and every time it’s close call after close call. We…we’re not gonna keep getting lucky. Eventually…eventually someone’s not coming back.” 

“Hey.” Steve cupped her cheek, forcing her to hold his gaze. “You don’t know that. I mean, I’m a pretty lucky guy. I scored you, right?” 

“Steve—” 

“I mean it. We’ve been through a lot of shit, but…I don’t know. I feel like we’ve got more shit to go through, like—okay, that doesn’t sound good when I say it like that, but I mean—” 

Christine leaned forward, catching him in a kiss and silencing the rest of his explanation. Steve sighed in content, his fingers sliding from her chin back into her hair. 

Eddie quickly averted his eyes. Quietly as he could, he folded his arms on his knees and buried his face in his elbow. He felt bad for eavesdropping, but in the small space, even their breathing was impossible to ignore. He could hear it when Steve groaned again, when their lips finally broke apart, when they exchanged quiet I love you’s. He heard Christine sniffle, make some excuse about checking in with Nancy, and then shuffle away into the woods. 

Still, Eddie sat with his face in his arms, trying not to move or draw attention to himself. He felt like he’d trespassed on something he wasn’t supposed to see, which was dumb because Steve and Christine had both known he was there. It wasn’t like he’d snuck in to spy on them. Of course they were comfortable kissing in public. They’d been a thing for like a year, if he remembered right—longer, if all the shit from the rumor mill was true. Eddie was the one being weird about their PDA. 

It was a few minutes before he finally felt comfortable enough to look up again. Christine was long gone, probably outside talking with Nancy and Robin, by the sounds of it. Under the rock, it was just him and Steve—Steve “The Hair” Harrington. He looked a paler, but maybe that was just the contrast to his girlfriend’s red flannel around his stomach. His eyes were closed under the wayward locks of damp hair, and his chest— 

Eddie froze. He wasn’t trying to be weird by staring at the dude’s chest, but he was pretty sure it wasn’t moving. There was just enough ambient light that his skin was shiny with sweat, but it was shiny in a way that wasn’t changing, but it should be changing at least a little bit because his chest should be moving when he was breathing, and if his chest wasn’t moving— 

“Harrington.” Eddie scooted forward across the dirt, cautiously nudging Steve’s foot with his shoe. “Yo, Harrington. You still with me?” 

Steve made a noise of protest. “M’fine.” 

Eddie was so relieved, he flopped right down into the dirt. 

“Dude,” he sighed, grinning up at the boulder above him. “You just scared the fucking shit out of me. Holy shit.” 

Steve had just enough energy to chuckle. Eddie could hear his breath hitch whenever it caused him pain, but Steve just kept laughing. 

Eddie lifted his head to give him a curious look. “Uh…should I ask Buckley if hysterics are a symptom of rabies?” 

“No, no, I’m—ha—I’m good.” 

“O-kay…what’s so funny?” 

“Nothing.” Steve grinned, mopping his hair out of his face again. “I just get a kick out of that: scaring the shit out of Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson. Feel like I deserve a badge or something.” 

A week ago, a comment like that from a guy like Steve Harrington would have made Eddie’s blood boil. Now, lying with him in another dimension, at Skull Rock of all places, Eddie’s face split into a wide smile. 

“I’ll do you one better.” With a sudden burst of energy, he hopped to his feet, shrugged off his denim vest, and folded it neatly in half. Steve raised an eyebrow as Eddie sank into a bow at his feet. “I present you with the very shirt off my back, m’lord. A show of gratitude for your bravery, valor and—you know, all that shit.” 

“Wow. I’m honored.” 

Even though Steve’s voice was dripping with sarcasm, it didn’t stop him from accepting the vest. He winced as he sat up again, but waved Eddie off when he moved to help. It took him a few extra seconds to slip his arms through the holes, his muscles stiff and store from the fight, but eventually, he was able to sag back against the stone, vest properly in place over his chest. 

“So?” he asked, holding his hands out for assessment. “How do I look?” 

Eddie considered him. Things had felt a little awkward when Steve started stripping on the boat. It should’ve been better now that he was covered up, but somehow, the vest made him look even more…Eddie wasn’t sure what the right word was. There was also the innate comedy of seeing preppy Steve Harrington sporting a Megadeth patch and heavy metal pins, but again, somehow he pulled it off. With the red flannel and grime and the bruises on his neck, it just made him look… 

“Damn good, Harrington. Metalhead suits you.” 

Steve snorted as Eddie plopped down next to him in the dirt. “Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind if we ever get out of this shit hole.” 

“Woah, hold on,” said Eddie, looking over in concern. “What happened to ‘I’m fine,’ ‘I’m a lucky guy’?” 

 “Nah,” Steve sighed. “I mean, we’re lucky, but we’re not that lucky. All the bullshit that’s gone on in this town…it’s put her through the wringer. She lost Barb, then she lost El for a while, now she’s lost El and Hopper. She’s been through enough. I don’t want her to worry about me.” 

“…okay, granted, I’ve never done the whole relationship thing, but I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works.” 

Steve didn’t reply; no laugh, no arguing, no snappy reply, not even a sigh. He just stared at the ground in front of him, solemn and despondent. 

Eddie watched him, nervously fiddling with the rings on his left hand. He was in no position to give relationship advice. He was probably less qualified to talk about that than he was to discuss the “Upside Down.” But he wasn’t about to leave Harrington hanging either. 

“You know, you and Walcott are good together.” 

Steve lifted his head and, dare Eddie even think it, his eyes looked hopeful. 

“Yeah?” 

“Totally,” Eddie assured him. “Don’t get me wrong; when you two went public, I was clutching my pearls with the rest of ‘em. Even without bringing Wheeler into it, you guys were pushing the envelope of Hawkins cliques. I mean, King Steve? Dating nerdy, little Chrissy—what did that dickhead used to call her?” 

“Psycho Bitch,” Steve supplied. “Yeah, Tommy was a real asshole.” 

“That’s right, Tommy H. What a fucker. Anyway—I remember thinking, ‘How the hell does that work?’ Now, though—now, I get it. The way you guys take care of each other. I guess that’s the upside to fighting bloodthirsty monsters year after year.” 

He smiled cheekily, but Steve didn’t say anything. He was looking at the ground again, pensive this time. 

“You know something?” he said at last, a small smile playing on his lips. “I don’t think it has anything to do with that.” 

Eddie raised a brow. “No?” 

“Nope. I mean—the first time, definitely. Will going missing started a whole bunch of shit that everyone got dragged into and—hell, if that hadn’t happened, I might not have cleaned up my act. But everything after that…” 

The thought fell away as he ran a thumb along his lower lip. Eddie hoped he was reminiscing and not slipping into some kind of coma; he wasn’t prepared for that. 

“Nancy would’ve dumped me either way,” Steve continued. “Even back then I knew she was gunning for Jonathan. That was only a matter of time. And Chris…she still would’ve been there for me. She still would’ve teased me and cheered me up, and I still would’ve gotten twisted over guys like Billy Hargrove flirting with her. Henderson definitely nudged us along when we got stuck on babysitting duty, but…I like to think I would’ve seen it on my own. Eventually. That even without all the monsters and government agents and conspiracy theories, I still could have been the guy she deserves.” 

Steve continued to stare at the ground as he thought that over. It was a few seconds before he noticed Eddie staring at him. 

“What?” 

“Nothing,” Eddie answered, grinning in disbelief. “Just—dude, did you walk right out of a John Hughes movie or something?” 

“Ah, shut the hell up, Munson.” 

“No, I’m serious. That shit was beautiful. You keep talking like that I might have to kiss you myself.” 

He leaned teasingly close to Steve’s face, happy to sustain a sharp elbow to the ribs in return. At least Steve was still strong enough to hit him. 

“Ow! So, that’s a no?” 

Steve smiled and shook his head. “You gotta talk to Chrissy, man. She calls all the shots.” 

“Figures Walcott’s in charge.” 

“Always.” 

Eddie quirked an eyebrow and stole a glance at Steve out of the corner of his eye. The way the conversation was going, Eddie was starting to worry the guy was delirious from blood loss, but Steve was still breathing. He had his head tipped back again, resting against the wall with his eyes closed, smirking to himself. Eddie could only imagine what sort of fever dreams he was having now, but he decided to leave him to it. 

“I’m gonna check on the girls,” Eddie announced, getting to his feet again. “Don’t die on me, Harrington.” 

“I’ll do my best,” Steve assured him without opening his eyes. 

 Eddie hovered at the edge of the clearing, still watching him. He’d just had a whole-ass conversation with Steve “The Hair” Harrington—a good one. What a fucking trip. 

Shaking his head at himself, he jogged a few steps down the hill toward the girls—only to stop short. Nancy and Robin were both at the tree line, talking in hushed voices and pointing in different directions. Eddie looked left, looked right, but Christine was nowhere to be found. Panic flooded his veins, visions of Chrissy Cunningham’s broken bones flashing before his eyes. Just before he started screaming, Robin caught his eye. She jerked her head back toward Skull Rock, indicating the dark forest behind it. With a half-hearted smile, she turned back to Nancy. 

Eddie clutched his chest, where his heart was still pounding away. He kept having to remind himself that his classmates had done this before; if they weren’t freaking out, he probably didn’t need to freak out. Christine was around here somewhere, probably looking for some alone time to catch her breath and get her worries under control. He could respect that—and he should’ve—but it was hard to think when he could still hear his pulse in his ears. 

 He found her pretty quickly. She’d gone around to the other side of Skull Rock, leaning against the boulder for support. The way her shoulders were shaking, Eddie realized at once that he’d made a mistake. He wanted to backtrack, but Christine had already heard his rustling footsteps. Her head popped up, eyes wide and watery, her cheeks streaked dirt and tears. It almost looked like war paint. 

“Sorry,” Eddie said at once. “I was just—you weren’t—I can go—” 

“It’s fine.” Christine’s voice was thick as she wiped her eyes. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have wandered off. God, I need to pull it together.” 

She was scolding herself, but made no move to leave. Eddie took that as his invitation to stray a little closer. 

“Hey, no judgement from me. My weekend was full of crying. Seriously. That boatshed they found me in? That used to be a regular shed.” 

It didn’t make a lot of sense, but it succeeded in pulling a laugh out of her. Christine carded her hands through her hair, leaning back against the rocks once more. 

“I’m sorry,” she apologized again. 

 “It’s really—” 

“No, it’s not. You haven’t done this before, but we have, which means we should be working on a plan to get out of here and clear your name, instead of hiding in the woods bawling my eyes out—” 

“Hey.” Eddie ducked down to catch her gaze. “You’re fine, Chrissy. Your eyes are still firmly seated in your skull, I promise you.” 

Christine didn’t appreciate the joke as much as he did. She rolled her eyes in exasperation, but even then, he was pretty sure she was hiding a smirk. 

“What about you?” she asked. 

“Me? I mean, I can still see you, so I assume my eyes—” 

“Not that.” 

She fixed him with a knowing look and Eddie deflated. He sucked his teeth bitterly and folded his arms over his chest. 

“You know, for a rogue, your persuasion modifier is a real bitch.” 

“I’m aware,” Christine replied with a smirk, “and I chose my proficiencies very carefully. It’s not all stealth and perception checks, you know.” 

Eddie clapped a hand over his heart and doubled over, playing up his groan of agony. “God, you’re killing me, Princess. I’m begging you, when we get back, just one—” 

“I’m not coming to Hellfire. Don’t change the subject.” 

He sighed dramatically, letting his head fall back as he spun in circle, trying to dodge the question. He screwed around for a few more seconds, but he knew it was futile. There was something about Christine Walcott that always made him cave. 

“I’ve been worse. Seriously,” he added when she cocked an eyebrow. “I don’t know how my life got so fucked up that being stranded in a parallel dimension and hunted by the minions of Vecna and Demogorgon, King of Demons, isn’t the worst day of my fucking life, but…I’ve honestly been worse.” 

He gave her a wry smile and clapped his hands together. The fact was that he did know how his life had gotten fucked up, and it had all started with that visit from Chrissy Cunningham. He wasn’t sure life could get much worse than watching someone die like that and then being accused of murder. 

Eddie didn’t say that out loud, but Christine mirrored his smile in understanding. 

“Still. I’m sorry for botching your spring break.” 

“Right,” Eddie snorted, “well you got arrested, dragged to another dimension, and then bandaged your boyfriend’s precious abs, so…I guess your week isn’t stellar either.” 

“That is true.” 

Both of them laughed—quiet and miserable, but glad for the company. It was unlike anything Eddie had experienced before. He had acquaintances, friends, and he loved his bandmates like brothers, but something about this felt different. It was almost uncomfortable how easily Christine seemed to understand him. At the same time, for someone who’d been ostracized and called a freak their entire life, it was also a sweet relief. 

“Alright,” he said with another performative sigh. “You leave me with no choice.” 

He scanned the forest around them, making sure there was no one nearby. Then he turned back to Christine, screwed up his face, and held his arms out at his sides. 

“…you good?” she asked with a smirk in her voice. 

“Come on, bring it in,” Eddie urged her, “but make it quick. I got a reputation to protect.” 

Her scandalized laugh made it hard for him to keep a straight face. He jiggled his arms, the chains on his cuffs jingling insistently, and was finally rewarded with the sound of footsteps. He tensed as Christine got closer, battling his instinct to cut and run in the face of uncertainty. 

“You’re fucking weird, Munson,” she sighed before pulling him into a hug. 

It was another comment that should have stung, but he was oh so glad it didn’t. The way Christine said it, practically giggling, made Eddie’s chest fill with warmth. Or maybe that was the way she’d snuck her arms under the back of his leather jacket, her forehead pressed into his shoulder. He patted her hair, awkward even though he’d been the one to initiate the hug; he really needed to figure out what his deal was with PDA. 

Eddie was so caught up in his thoughts, it took him a while to notice that Christine was shaking. He looked down in horror, terrified that she’d started crying again, but this time her cheeks were dry. He pried her away from his chest, scanning her head to toe for some sign of distress, when it finally hit him. 

“Shit, Chrissy, you’re freezing.” 

Christine waved off his concern, even as she wrapped her bare arms around her torso. Forfeiting her flannel for Steve left her just in a white camisole and, now that Eddie had the brain to look, her arms were covered in goosebumps. 

“It’s fine, Eddie. Really—no, don’t—” 

He was already shrugging off his leather jacket, taking advantage of his height and long arms when she tried to push it away. He hung it over her head and dodged her defense, forcing the jacket around her shoulders like a grand cape. 

“I’ve got long sleeves anyway,” he assured her. 

“Eddie—” 

“Walcott, I’m counting on you to clear my name. You can’t do that if you die from hypothermia.” 

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic.” 

“I’m a DM, baby. It’s in my nature.” He winked at her, grinning with pride when she averted her eyes. “Come on, Princess. Let’s check on your boyfriend.”

Eddie slung his arm around her shoulders, guiding her through the woods and back toward the main clearing. Both he and Christine ignored the curious looks from Nancy and Robin, turning instead toward the tiny alcove where they’d left Steve. This time, Eddie hung back, watching at a safe distance as Christine ducked out from under his arm and knelt down next to her boyfriend. 

Steve was dozing, but still very much alive. He blinked blearily up at Christine, a tired smile on his face when she poked the denim vest on his chest. Eddie couldn’t hear what they were saying, but he caught Christine’s smile as she shrugged the leather jacket off, only to slide her arms properly through the sleeves. She shuffled to lean her back on the stone next to Steve, tucking her legs up and grabbing Steve’s hand so she could entwine their fingers. After a few more soft words, she nuzzled her head into Steve’s shoulder and both of them closed their eyes. 

It was probably a good idea to take advantage of the brief lull in the action so they could recharge. Eddie thought of doing the same, or else joining in the planning that Nancy and Robin were doing, the way he’d intended to earlier. Instead, he stayed rooted to the spot, running his lips over his knuckles as he looked at the couple before him: Steve “The Hair” Harrington and Christine “Psycho Bitch” Walcott, curled up together in clothes they’d borrowed from Eddie “The Freak” Munson. Maybe Harrington wasn’t the one who was delirious. This whole thing felt like a damn fever dream. 

Eddie let out a long, controlled breath, trying to deny the smile twitching at his lips. Things had definitely changed, and they were definitely changed forever and fucking always. 1986 was kinda batshit.

[dracofeltonmalfoy]

Cute Babies

Pairing: Draco x Y/N

Warnings: Swearing, mention of deaths, angst and fluff

Word Count: 5266

A/N: Baldy, no nose voldy doesn’t exist, Snape has a niece and his father is in this story. Also Lucius is nice.

This was a request, @bbeauttyybbx hope you like it hun! xxx

“Malfoy, if you DO NOT move out of my way, I will kick you in your groin like I did exactly 2 months ago and poor old Parkinson as well as the 6 other girls you were entertaining at the time were not able to get their sexual satisfaction from you and you weren’t able to piss without your dick hurting, so Mr Malfoy if you don’t want that to happen again I suggest you MOVE!” She screamed in Draco’s face. For a 5’2 girl who looks very angelic with her Y/H/L Y/H/C hair and shiny Y/E/C eyes, she sure was intimidating when she was angry, but the only person who found her anger very amusing and a form of entertainment was the platinum haired, 5’9, grey eyed boy, Draco Malfoy.

“Y/L/N, let's not make that mistake again, hmm? You know very well you only did that because you were jealous you weren’t in their place and to be very honest with you, you...will...never be. Just look at yourself, no fashion sense, so short and have been with every boy our age in slytherin. Do you think I’d really go for a girl like you?” Draco whispered in her ear, this was enough for Y/N to, once again, knee him, but before she could he grabbed her wrist and spun her around so her back was now against his chest and her arm twisted behind her. “No, darling. Don’t you dare try that again.”

“Malfoy, let me go or I swear I will hex you.”

“Try,”

“Malfoy, I’m going to say it again, let me go.”

“Hmmm, I’ll let you go, but only if you do one thing.”

“Oh hell no, I am not doing anything for you Malfoy, we can stand her for as long as you want then and be late to potions, but I am not doing anything you tell me too. And anyways, Snape loves me more than you, he is my mother’s brother after all.”

“Your wish is my command Y/L/N.” Draco’s grip on Y/N’s arm was getting tighter and tighter and Y/N knew she was going to have a print of his fingers on her arm, but there was no way she was going to tell him that he was hurting her. “Come on Y/L/N, it’s obvious you’re hurting, why don’t you listen to the deal.” She stood there quietly, giving no response, resulting in Draco tightening his grip even more, but this time using his free hand to grab her chin and turning it sideways so he could see her face. “Dump Zabini.” he breathed out

“Are you having a laugh Malfoy? Why would I dump my boyfriend because you told me to, not to mention my boyfriend of 2 years?”

“You answered your own question darling, because I told you to. And i’ll tell ya something else, right now, this very second Zabini is shagging your best friend in the broom cupboard.” after saying that the platinum haired boy let her out of his grip.

“Oh you’ve crossed the line Malfoy, you have crossed the fucking line.”

“I knew you wouldn’t believe me, let’s go to potions and see where your beloved boyfriend and best friend are shall we?”

“Go suck a dick, you git!”

Y/N ran to potions, her heart pounding and her head spinning. She stopped outside her class to see that Malfoy was right, both Blaise and Pansy were missing. “Told you so.” Malfoy whispered in her ear before entering the class.

“Mr Malfoy…oh and Y/N, why are you two so late?” Snape asked firmly, but before any more words were spoken, Y/N ran to the broom cupboard. Breathless, she whipped the door open to see her boyfriend, ex-boyfriend and best friend, ex-best friend all over each other.

“My grandfather will definitely be hearing about this, but for now MY UNCLE WILL HEAR ABOUT THIS! YOU FILTHY LITTLE PEASANTS! HOW FUCKING DARE YOU TWO? HOW DARE YOU DECEIVE ME? ME?!?! Y/N Y/L/N? ONE MINUTE, IT WILL TAKE ME LESS THAN A MINUTE TO FUCK YOUR LIVES UP!” Y/N screamed, her eyes fogging up, but she didn’t dare let a tear fall.

“Babe, babe it's not what you think it is I…”

“Oh sod off, you didn’t deserve me anyways, my papa was right, I should’ve gone for some with the same standards as me. He was right, you were only with me for the money!” She screamed, trying not to break down in front of them. “You look like you're about to shit yourself sweetheart, don't worry i’ll just think all the money I spent on you was charity.” And with that she stormed off to go to potions, leaving Zabini and Parkinson dreading what might happen next.

“Uncle?” Y/N whispered, her head down, trying hard not to let the class know she was crying.

“Y/N? Where did you go?” Snape questioned, looking at his deceased sister’s last memento.

“Can I please talk to you?”

“We are in a…”

“Now?” she looked up a bit and Snape saw her puffy eyes, but at the same time someone else did as well. He quickly gave the class some work to do, grabbed Y/N and left the class.

Draco sat at his desk, observing everything that happened. He should've been happy, he was happy, until he saw her puffy eyes, her red eyes, eyes filled with tears and pain. The girl, who never cried, the girl who didn’t even cry when her parents were killed, the girl who only spread happiness and joy was crying. Y/N told her uncle everything and to say her uncle was more relieved than angry was an understatement. “Y/N, they will be punished, I promise you, but I am extremely happy right now that the facade ended. You deserve someone who is as wealthy as you, someone who me and your papa think is reliable and we have chosen the someone for you.”

“You have?”

“Yes, after you have graduated this year we will be visiting your future in-laws, it was your mother’s wish to get you married straight after you graduated. I will not tell you who it is, but you will be happy with this decision and one more thing focus on your N.E.W.T.S, not on that stupid boy, go to your dorm now.” Snape finished and showed a rare sign of affection by kissing the top of the heartbroken girl’s head.

Summer Holidays

Y/N, her papa and Snape were standing outside Malfoy Manor. Y/N was shocked, extremely shocked, her jaw was practically touching the floor. “Papa?” “Yes, my angel.” “THE Malfoys?” “Yes, my angel.” “THE Malfoys?” “I thought we already answered that question, but yes my angel.” “Papa, nooooooooo, pwease, pwease, pwease, pwease, pwease, pweaseeeeeee.” Y/N begged, with the cutest, most innocent puppy eyes and sad face. “No, father. No! Do not look at her and do not apparate back.” Snape said, receiving a glare from Y/N. “Angel, I don’t know how long i’m going to live and this is the last of your parents’ last wishes, please try to understand and not put up a fuss.” Y/N’s grandfather told her, he knew these words would melt Y/N a tiny bit and she would agree. “Fine, but please don’t talk about death, I don’t want to lose you two as well, you are the only good things I have left.” And with that said a house elf appeared and escorted them inside the manor.

Y/N was wearing a long red silk dress that showed off her curves, her hair braided like a crown at the top and the rest of her hair curled and down. She looked breathtaking. “Good afternoon, it’s lovely seeing you here Mr Snape, Severus and Miss Y/L/N.” a voice called, it was Lucius Malfoy. “Good afternoon son, good afternoon Narcissa, where is the young Malfoy?” Y/N’s papa questioned and Y/N tried her hardest not to roll her eyes at his name. “He’ll be down by the time we have settled down in the dining room.” Narcissa replied sweetly, she was Y/N’s favourite Malfoy, sweet and kind, she sometimes reminded her of her own mother.

When they entered the dining room, Draco was standing there waiting for them. The two teens made very awkward eye contact, to say the least, and Y/N could’ve sworn she saw Draco blush.

Draco’s POV

Fucking hell she looks amazing. What the hell? You hate her, you hate her, you hate her, well you don’t hate her, you dislike her. Right? Repeat the mantra Draco, you dislike her, you dislike her, you.. “Draco darling, come sit down. We all know Y/N looks beautiful tonight, no need to make her feel awkward.” Mother teased. Shit! Was I staring for that long? I took a seat in front of Y/N, which was probably the worst decision i’ve made tonight, and “So, should we talk about the wedding now or after dinner?” Father asked. “I think after dinner is perfect, an old man needs to fill his stomach up before making big decisions.” Y/N’s grandfather laughed and Y/N smiled and shook her head. Merlin, she looked angelic.

During dinner I think I looked at her about 50 times, very slyly, obviously. Me, the Slytherin Prince, being sly, as easy as pie. “Do I have something on my face?” Shit, she’s caught me. “Huh? I mean pardon?” “Do...I...have...something...on...my...face?” “You didn’t have to say it like I have a hearing problem! I can hear very well thanks!” “Well, you were the one who said ‘huh, pardon?’ not me! SO I thought maybe you’ve developed a hearing problem of some sort. Also, I asked you a question so stop avoiding it!” “Who said I was avoiding your silly question? To answer your question Y/L...Y/N, yes there is! Your nose, your eyes, your lips, your eyebrows, there's a lot on your face!” “Have you never…why are you guys laughing?” Y/N asked the elders around us “Oh nothing dear, how wonderful! Young love! What a beauty!” mother answered. “Young WHAT?” Both of us questioned, together! “Young love children, it always starts off with some teasing and bickering. You two already sound like a married couple!”

“Draco, please give Y/N the wonderful, wonderful, gift you have selected for her.” “Yes, mother. Y/N, here, this is for you.” I handed her a velvet box that had a green emerald pendant in it, mother had chosen it, because I didn’t know about this arrangement until yesterday night and I expect Y/N didn’t as well. “Thanks, um…” “Here angel give this to Draco. Son, Y/N selected this for you, with a lot of love.” “I did? I did, yeh I did! Um...here you go, hope you like it haha.” Ok she definitely didn’t pick it and she definitely didn’t know about this arrangement either. I opened the box to see a snake ring, not that I needed anymore, but I still liked it. “Thank you, I do like it.”

“Draco, son, why don’t you and Y/N go for a walk, we’ll call you when dessert is ready?” Mother offered, well basically told me, I nodded my head and waited for Y/N to stand up. I walked out and she was behind me, walking so slowly. We got to the garden and I turned around to see Y/N missing. “Y/N? Y/N? For Salazar’s sake Y/N are you that dumb you can’t follow a 5’9 guy properly? Y/N!” I yelled and to my surprise she was knelt down in front of the roses, looking at them in awe, like they were the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. “I was shouting your name Y/L/N, you could’ve at least told me you’re here!” “Oh, you were? The thing is, the two words you call me are midget or Y/L/N, so I couldn’t hear my first name from your pretty mouth.” “Pretty mouth? You think I have a pretty mouth? Well you will be thrilled to know that after marriage this pretty mouth will be all yours!” I smirked, but internally cursing myself for being such an idiotic flirt, that was such a stupid pick up line, if you would even call it a pick up line.

“Thank you.” she said softly. “Thank you? I should say thank you, you complimented..” “No, you git! Thank you for telling me about Bla...those two.” She looked down towards her feet. “Y/N/N, um, Y/N, shit um, Y/L/N, I…it’s um...you don’t need to thank me. I...um...I…” “So first you call me by my first name, then you call me by my nickname and now you stutter as well? Any other surprises Draco?” DRACO! SHE CALLED ME DRACO! I SWEAR MY HEART DID 5 SOMERSAULTS IN 2 SECONDS! Her saying my first name was so damn cute. “I’m sorry.” “Oh for fucks sake another surprise! THE Draco Malfoy apologizing, now that really is a surprise!” She laughed anndddddd there we go again my heart flipping over and over again. “But honestly, jokes apart, why are you saying sorry?” “Because I made you cry that day.” “Not the first time.” “Oh, wait, I've made you cry before?” “Mhm, but forget that…” “No, no, no forgetting, please tell me.” “Anddddd another surprise. Draco, are you sure you’re not drunk?” “No, I'm not.” I grabbed her hand and led her to the bench near us and sat down, patting the place next to me telling her to sit down. To my surprise, she actually did. “Do you remember in first year I was wearing an old rusty watch?” “Yes?” “And you made fun of me for having all the money in the world, but wearing a rusty old watch like a mudbl...that word. That was my late mother’s watch, it was the first present my father got her when they got married, with his own money, not his inheritance. And it was thrown in the bin, because it wasn’t slytherin enough” Oh shit. “Then when you broke my quill?” “I didn’t Goyle did.” “You stood there and laughed, you stood there and encouraged him. That was my late father’s lucky quill and he gave it to me before he died and said my lucky charm gets my lucky quill, I don’t need this when I have you with me.” I was such a prick. “Then when…” “I...I can't hear anymore Y/N, I am sorry, I really am sorry.”

I look up to see tears rolling down her cheeks. I made her cry again. “Y/N/N I am so sorry, please, please don’t cry. Please love please. Please don’t cry.” I moved forward so I was sitting right next to her. Hesitantly, I brought her into my chest and wrapped my arms around her, one arm resting on the back of her head and one on her back. “Sshh, sshh it’s fine, it’ll all be ok, i’m so sorry, so so sorry. I am a fuck up, a big fuck up.” I moved my hands to each side of her cheek, wiping away the tears with my thumbs. “Do you know why I was a dick to you? It won’t really justify what I did, but it is something. I don’t know how to handle feelings Y/N, I show the same emotions to people I love, people I hate, people I like and people I dislike. The only person I’m not like that with is my mother. When I first saw you, I practically died there and then, I didn’t know how someone could look so beautiful, then after Christmas when I heard your parents passed away, I thought you’d be broken, but no, you were still smiling, giggling, enjoying yourself and to be honest I was jealous. How could someone be so strong. Then you got your first boyfriend, who wasn’t me, that killed me. Then you broke up after 2 years and he hurt you, so I hurt him and he broke both his arms during a quidditch game, even though we were in the same team and Ravenclaw got the blame. Then literally 6 months later you and Zabini got into a relationship, even though he knew I had feelings for you. If I really hated you Y/N, I would’ve stayed quiet about the fact that Zabini was cheating on you with Pansy. I kept trying to tell myself that I hate you, I dislike you, but everytime I see that smile of yours I can’t stop. Y/N/N, I’ve liked you since first year and I know it’s hard to believe, but I have.” Woah, okay I got that out of the way, but why wasn’t she replying?

Her mouth was wide open, eyes practically popping out of her head and she was frozen, I swear for a minute I thought someone had frozen her. “Can you please reply? I’m kinda shitting myself here.” Why did I say that? I mentally facepalmed myself. “What the fuck Draco? What the actual fuck? You can’t just be a dick for 7 years then say you love, well like me and then expect me to answer within 2 minutes of you saying that! I need time to actually let my brain function and understand what just happened!” “Um, ha, yeh, um...take as much time as…” “Oh, I will, thank you very much!” “Actually, um...could you kinda hurry up, because your silence and glare are kinda scaring me.” “Mhm.” “Mhm?” “Mhm” “Mhm?” “Mhm” “Mhm?” M FUCKING HM! NOW SHUT UP!” “I...sorry.” She looks so cute when she’s angry, wow. It started to rain ever so slightly, but looking up at the sky, it was obvious it was going to be pouring with rain very soon.

“I can’t believe it took you 7 years to say that you git! You are cute and tall and you have really nice eyes and you are quite handsome. We would have cute babies.” She started talking and I choked on my own spit. “Did I interrupt you when you were talking?” “No, sorry.” I cleared my throat. “I did have a little, now don’t suddenly have an ego boost, right where was I? Yeh! I did have a little crush on you, since we became potions partners, even though you were the world’s biggest prick. KEYWORD Malfoy, were! What I’m tryna get at here is, maybe, well yeah I like you too, but because both of us are, KEYWORDS AGAIN Draco, ARE AND WE, um where was I again? Yeh. We are so stubborn we didn’t tell each other that. Ok so what i’m gonna say is big, but don’t freak out, but I think the decision for us to get married was the right decision, but wrong time, but now I feel like it’s the right decision right…”I cut her off by cupping her cheeks and kissing her, she was shocked at first, but then our lips were moving in sync and that’s when I realised what I had done. Once again mentally facepalming myself during the kiss. Merlin, she was hard to resist, she’s adorable.

As I had expected it was pouring with rain and honestly, I just wanted time to stop, Y/N with me, it’s pouring with rain, how romantic! Oh if she heard me she’d think I’m so cringey. I pulled away and “Um sorry, I interrupted you again.” “This is the one interruption I don’t mind.” she said laughing and I could feel my face heating up and going red. This time, she pulled me in to kiss, her soft hands going around and wrapping around my neck and my hands resting on her waist. But obviously I couldn’t have a good moment without being interrupted. “Papaaaaa, THE Malfoys? THE Malfoys? Papaaaa noooooooo, pwease, pwease, pwease, pwease, pweaseeeeeeee. You two are the only good things I have lefttttttt. Angel, you said these words, not even 2 hours ago.” “Papa? Um, I, you always say you’re right and you’ll always make good decisions for me, so um I was just checking if the decision is really good or not.” Y/N laughed awkwardly, realised what she said and, “No, I meant, we were, um I don’t know, Draco?” “Oh um, Sir, we were getting to know each othe...ouch!” Y/N stepped on my foot and I realised what I had just said, we were stuck in a messy situation. “Oh kids, you youngsters say you understand jokes, but looking at your flustered states I don’t think you do.” Mr Snape laughed and we awkwardly laughed with him. “Once you’ve finished what you’ve started, come down and have dessert, just make sure Severus doesn’t see you two or he’ll probably hex you son.” “Papppppaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!” “See you in the dining room angel” And with that Y/N’s papa walked off laughing.

“One good thing Malfoy, one damn good thing was happening and you fuck up again!” “Fuck up, excuse you, but I didn’t invite your papa to walk into us snogging did I?” “Well, you could’ve, I don’t know, been more alert of the situation, kept your eyes open, looking out for people!” “Oh wow, so you expect me to keep my eyes open mid make out to look out for people. Darling, don’t you think that’s a bit creepy?” “No, well, yes, but no, but yes. Oh for fucks sake Draco! You’re so annoying!” Y/N starts walking stomping away. “Hey, we haven’t finished what we started!” “Sod off Malfoy, go finish it off with Parkinson!” Parkinson? Where did she come from? “OI! Come back!” I yelled, grabbing her wrist and pulling her into me before slamming my lips onto hers. Breathless, I reluctantly pull back, “Finish what we started off remember? Now, where were we again?” And we did finish off what we started, the only problem was that we didn’t want it to finish and we had to finish it so someone else (Severus Snape) didn't walk in on us making out. I quickly said a drying spell and we went back to the dining room.

Reader’s POV

“Welcome back children. Hope you enjoyed your time together.” Narcissa greeted the two, “Your wedding has been scheduled to be next month, 9th to be exact. Y/N as I am sure Severus and your grandfather have no idea how to shop for wedding dresses, Narcissa will take you.” “Yes, Sir, that’s perfectly fine.” “Oh please don’t call me Sir, you can call me father.” “Thank you.” “Tomorrow you and Draco will go out for lunch, I have booked you two a table. It is at 1:30 exactly, please do not be late.” “Um, I will be there, thank you.” “No need to say thank you dear.”

The Next Day

1:30 went to 1:40 to 1:50 to 2:00 to 2:30, but there was no sign of the young Malfoy and Y/N was getting very, very annoyed. “I’m leaving!” Y/N mumbled. “Y/N! Wait up!” Malfoy yelled, extremely out of breath. “WHAT TIME DO YOU CALL THIS? I HAVE BEEN WAITING HERE FOR AN HOUR DRA...MALFOY AND YOU ARE LATE! ENJOY THIS LUNCH BY YOURSELF, BECAUSE I AM NO LONGER INTERESTED! TAKE WHOEVER HELD YOU UP TO THIS LUNCH! I AM NOT HUNGRY!” and with that Y/N apparated back to her home. “Great, now what do I do?” Draco asked himself, rubbing the back of his neck.

“That git…” “Language.” “That boy was 1 hour late papa! I hate people who aren’t punctual! I can’t trust him, what if he’s late to our wedding?” “So you’re already thinking about your wedding?” “No...I…” “Go freshen up sweetheart. You seem tired” “Ok papa.”

WHOOSH! “What the..” “Hey!” Malfoy said. “Malfoy, before just apparating into someone's bedroom you should really apparate outside and knock first! As you can see I am currently wrapped in only a towel and I do not appreciate you turning up like this! You either turn up late or turn up without warning!” Y/N yelled, “Well I was late and you left, so I decided I’ll surprise you and turn up at your home” and to tease her more the platinum haired boy walked closer and closer, until Y/N’s knees hit the bed and she fell backwards. Draco leaned over her and whispered “You said something about us having cute babies yesterday, wouldn’t mind trying that out.” He stood back up and turned around, “I’ll wait for you downstairs, I have a little surprise for you.” And with that he left, leaving a very flustered Y/N laying on her bed, blushing like a maniac.

“Angel, look who’s here!” Y/N’s papa pointed towards Draco and Draco greeting her like he hadn’t just seen her half naked and left her extremely flustered 15 minutes ago. “What a very pleasant surprise!” Y/N greeted, very sarcastically. “Sir..” “Call me papa” “Papa, if I have your permission, could I take your angel somewhere today. Even though we were in the same school, same house, same year, we don’t know much about each other. I’d like to spend the day getting to know her.”

“Getting to know her? Like yesterday?” “PAPAAAAAA!” “I’m just joking angel.” “Son, come here quickly.” “Yes papa?” “Please do use protection if you get that far.” Mr Snape whispered in Draco’s ear, this time leaving Draco flustered, but Y/N overheard “PAPAAAA! OMG! DRACO GO OUTSIDE I’LL COME IN A MINUTE!” “Oh angel, look how red you have gotten, but please be safe.” “BYE PAPA!” “Bye angel.”

“You want babies, but papa wants us to use protection, pray tell me how that works?” “DRACOOOOOO!” “I haven’t even done anything and you’re already screaming my name.” “I will strangle you!” “Kinky.” “MALFOYYYY.” “Draco sounds better.” “That’s it, go where you wanna go alone, I’m not going with you.” “But I need you to have babies, I can’t have babies by myself, even though they would be perfect.” “DRACO! I AM GOING BACK HOME! AGAIN! ENJOY!” “Final decision?” “YUP!” Draco picked Y/N up bridal style, “PUT ME DOWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!” “The more you cooperate the quicker we get there sweetheart.” and led her to a very posh restaurant, different to the one from lunch, putting her down when they were at the door. They enter, have a lovely meal, get to know each other more (with words and quite a lot of kissing, let’s say more kissing than words) and when they had finished eating, Draco grabbed Y/N’s hand and said “Y/N, I know I've been a dick to you and I know I don’t deserve you. You are so beautiful, so adorable and yes we would have the cutest babies, mainly because of you and in order for that to happen you have to become Mrs Malfoy,” He got down on one knee and finished it off “Will you do the honour of marrying me, completing me and helping me become better? Will you Miss Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N marry me?” Y/N was in tears, she was an emotional wreck and to make it worse Draco stood up and before putting a ring on her finger, handed her two things, a watch that was EXACTLY like her mother’s and a quill that was EXACTLY like her father’s lucky quill.

“Dray…” she whispered, knowing if she spoke any louder she'd be sobbing. “I had to, we do need your parents' blessing as well and I didn’t want to feel guilty about the mistakes I made in the past and then look at you everytime and be reminded of all the times I made you cry and...this was the reason I was late earlier as well, I’m sorry my love. ” “YOU GIT! CAN YOU EVER DO ANYTHING WITHOUT MAKING ME CRYYYYYYYY?” “Hmmmmm, would making babies make you cry?” “DRACO LUCIUS MALFOY!” “Hey, I don’t wanna hear my father’s name being screamed in the process.” “DRACOOOO!” “That’s better, but we haven’t even started, Merlin, you wouldn’t last 10 minutes.” He chuckled, earning a big slap on the chest from Y/N. “You haven’t answered my question. Will you marry me?” “Do I have a choice? I do want cute babies.” “So, yes?” “Yes!” He slid the Malfoy ring on her finger and they shared a passionate, loving kiss, both melting into each other. “Do you want me to keep my eyes open?” Draco teased. “Draco, if you want me to kiss you then you need to shut up before you lose the privilege to be kissed.” “Mhm, mhm. You wouldn’t want that though.” “Just kiss me you sap” and before they could deepen the kiss, “I hope you remember my advice son!” Y/N’s grandfather yelled from outside the window. “PAPAAAAAAAAAA!” “How does he turn up every time I’m kissing you?” “If I knew don’t you think I’d make sure it doesn’t happen again? Draco use your brain for once.” the two lovers chuckled

Marriage Day

“Are you ready angel?” “I think I am papa.” “Then let’s go, they’re waiting for us.” The doors opened and all eyes were on Y/N, she looked stunning and Draco could not get his eyes off of her. “Holy shit,” he mumbled, earning a nudge from his father. The vows are said and they were pronounced husband and wife, Mr and Mrs Malfoy, finishing it off with a sweet kiss. Y/N’s grandfather goes up to the newly wedded couple and whispers “Remember the advice I gave you last month? Don’t use that today.” “papaaa,” Y/N whispered, her papa leaving the two of them blushing and shaking their heads while he went and sat down. “Well at least we now know when we can start making cute babies.” Draco whispered “You’re such an idiot.” “I’m your idiot,” “Sap” “Only for you.”

Quite some time later

“Daddy?” “Yes Angel?” “Me and Shcorp have a question.” “Go ahead.” “Shcorp you ask.” “Daddy?” “Yes Scorpius?” “Did you and mummy have an argument last night?” “No sweetheart we didn't, why'd you ask?” Y/N asked, giving the twins milkshakes, Draco his coffee and sitting down next to him drinking her own coffee. Draco wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her closer to him and then gave her a confused look and she shrugged her shoulders in response. “Because we heard mummy shout your name quite a few times last night.” “JDCIFDOIACODJNAOVCD” Y/N and Draco both choked on their coffees, red in the face and extremely embarrassed, both coughing their lungs out staring at each other not knowing what to do or say. “My lovely children, have you heard of the term making cute babies?” Y/N’s papa came in and asked. The innocent children shaking their heads and their poor parents growing redder and redder. “Well, that’s what was happening.” the old man laughed. “PAPAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Draco and Y/N shouted, very very embarrassed. To hide her embarrassment she hid her face in Draco’s chest. “So you were making cute babies? WE WANT TO MAKE CUTE BABIES!” “SCORP! ANGEL! NO!” the embarrassed couple yelled, “Children let your parents do that job.” “PAPPPPAAAAAAAAAA!” 

Y/N was right when she said they’d make cute babies, because the two kids sitting in front of them were the cutest and most beautiful kids anyone had seen.

taglist:

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[illfoandillfie]

Easy As A-B-C

Pairing: Professor!Gwilym Lee x Reader

Summery:  Professor Lee is getting sick of marking papers, you offer an alternative. One where he doesn't need to think at all.

Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected sex, bimbofication (without hypnosis), oral sex (m and f receiving), hand job, light dom/sub dynamic, dom!reader, sub!Gwil, overstimulation, maybe a little bit of hair pulling

Words: 4,537

A/N: This was massively massively inspired by my love @dracoladon​ and her Drarry fic Lucid (seriously, go read it because she’s a much better writer than me and also sex dumb Draco is hhhhhhh). Reading it made me want to write more himbo fics but without all the hypnosis stuff thats in my Future Management series. Then I got talking to @peachydeacon​ about himbo!Rog which led to talking about himbo!Gwil and this fic is the result of our discussion lmao. It was also partly inspired by a post on a porn blog that popped up on my dash but I can’t link to that because tumblrs dumb. 

Also, it is a professor gwil fic but set after reader has graduated so it’s all above board lmao

Blurb Advent: Day 24

Taglist:  @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama​ @deakyclicks​ @jennyggggrrr​ @drowseoftaylor​ @hannafuckingsucks​ @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming​ @queenmylovely​ @ilovequeenmorethanyou​ @johndeaconshands​ @borhapbois​ @stardust-galaxies​ @cherries-n-rocknroll​ @rogersslave​ @scorpiogemini 

Gwilym looked unreasonably hot while he was grading papers, his brow knitted, wearing a look of serious concentration made all the more noticeable by the reading glasses sliding down his nose. His loose tie and the undone top buttons of his business shirt lent him a casually dishevelled air, and that wasn’t even mentioning the way he absentmindedly twisted his pen between his fingers as he read and reread sentences he was struggling to understand, occasionally pausing to underline something or write a note in the margins. It all painted a very sexy image, the kind of serious sexy only a professor could achieve, though this sexiness was nowhere near new. You’d found his manner oddly arousing even when he’d been your professor. Of course, that had been a few years ago and well before you’d had your chance encounter in the local second hand bookstore that led you to ask him out. He’d stuttered out something about never having even thought of you as more than his student and “really I feel almost as if I’ll get in trouble for the conversation as soon as I get back to campus.” But the awkwardness soon changed when you confessed to having had a minor crush on him back in the day and having since hoped to run into him. He seemed more open to the idea of dinner with you after that and, if you were being honest, more cocky too, but cocky in a decidedly dignified and charming way. Anyway, one thing led to another and now here you were somewhere close to a year and half later and you were struggling not to stare at Gwil as he graded papers and looked professor-ally disarrayed and hot.

You knew it was something to do with the Romantic era poets that the students had to write about because he’d read a question out to you earlier to get your opinion of if it was confusingly worded. “No, I don’t think so,” “Then why in god’s name do none of my students get it?” he looked about ready to hit his head against the desk until he passed out but he returned to the topmost paper with a sigh and ruffled hair from where he’d run his hand through it. That’s when you’d started trying not to stare. A tall order when all you could think about was dragging Gwil to the bedroom and ravishing him enough to make him forget all about John Keats and poetry and the English language itself. Not that that was exactly hard. No, Gwilym had a tendency to get a little dazed and confused when you really gave it to him. Sex drunk you’d decided to call it. A transformation that you quite delighted in witnessing and causing. Gwil was sharp as a tack usually, always ready with some obscure fact or quote from literature. It was part of what made him such a good teacher, his memory for all things bookish, as well as his approachable (if a little stern) demeanour and his determination to get the best from his students. But it wasn’t hard to shut down his brain, cloud his memory and entirely befuddle him. One time you’d snuck into the bathroom at the restaurant you’d gone to for dinner and poor Gwilym had become so spaced out he’d spilt half a glass of wine in his lap and then walked into the glass door as you left, even with you leading him by the hand. You supposed that what they said about great power and responsibility was true. All the same, it was a fun power to wield and you knew that, with the right sort of attention, you could have Gwilym babbling incomprehensible gibberish with no memory of what a poem even was, which was surely something he’d appreciate right about now.

You blinked yourself from your reverie as, finally, Gwil set his glasses aside and rose from his seat, groaning as he stretched out the stiffness in his back. He rolled his neck back and forth, your eyes following, before letting his shoulders drop and moving to sit next to you on the couch. “I can’t do it anymore, I can’t read another word about Byron or I’ll loose it.” He sighed, draping an arm around your shoulders and leaning into your neck. “Byron? I remember that assignment. Everyone hated you for it,” His breath was warm against your skin as he spoke, sending a tingle down your spine, “Well if this year’s lot is anything to go by, the feeling was probably mutual,” “Mmm, I remember one girl saying she was going to shove her copy of Don Juan up your arse if she didn’t pass,” He lifted his head again and laughed, “And yet my rectum remains Byron fee and no other injuries befell me, so either I taught you enough to get by or you were all a bunch of cowards,” “Bit of both probably. And why would this year’s be any different, huh?” “I don’t know, you haven’t read any of their attempts at cohesive analysis. Some of them are just throwing out terms like allusion and anapestic and personification all willy-nilly, clearly without properly understanding them. ” “I think you’re being too harsh on them. They’re first years after all and it’s not always easy to understand all that poncy poetical bullshit. Plus, you know it all already so of course everyone else seems stupid to you,” “Maybe,” he conceded, though it seemed to take some effort. “Honestly, someone should put you in their position, see how well you go with it,” “Yeah? And who would do something like that?” Gwilym laughed as you shifted to straddle his lap, accepting the kiss you offered, “You?” “Maybe I will. Spell personification for me,” “You know it’s not high school English, right. We don’t do pop quizzes on spelling and grammar.” “I know you don’t, but this is my subject and I’m testing spelling. Besides,” you let your hand drop between you, brushing lightly over the front of his pants, “I promise it’ll be fun.” Gwil gave a half-hearted eye roll, “P-E-R-S-O-N-I-F-I-C-A-T-I-O-N, personification. D’you want me to use it in a sentence too?” You knew he’d get it right. Gwil always had been good at spelling off the top of his head which you supposed was a side effect of all his reading and the years devoted to the written word. But it was still a little annoying. Mostly because he was being a bit of a tool about the whole thing, but it didn’t help that you’d grown quite wet thinking about how you’d like to have him, like to turn him into the fucked out airhead you’d seen before. You shook your head and tutted at him as if he got it wrong. “No, that’s definitely it. I’ve just read it about a hundred times, I know I’m right. P-E-R-S-O-N-I-F-I-C-A-T-I-O-N,” he spelt it faster that time, trying to prove that you were wrong. “Try allusion for me,” “A-L-L-U-S-I-O-N,” Right again. You sighed as if you were disappointed. Gwilym raised his eyebrows but said nothing. “What about caesura?” “C-E-A-S-U-R-A,” The mistake was an easy one to make, two letters flipped around the wrong way, and you could tell he knew it was wrong as soon as he’d said it. He was surprised when you leant forward to kiss him again, cupping his jaw with one hand as you dropped the other and slowly pulled down the zip on his work pants. “But I fucked up,” he said softly, eyes still closed as you pulled away a few centimetres. You just smiled as you thought of a new word, “Anapestic,” It was another word Gwil had mentioned as seeing in his student’s essays so you knew it would be fresh in his mind and he proved as much when he spelt it, “A-N-A-P-E-S-T-I-C,” He was right of course, so you tutted and pulled your hand away from his crotch, grabbing his chin with your other and forcing him to look at you, “You can do better than that.” His features shifted at the sudden loss of contact, the look of concentration returned once more. If anything, your much closer proximity to the expression made him seem all the more hot but you resisted the urge to give in and drag him to the bedroom, curious if he’d catch onto your little game now and, equally so, to see if he’d play along, “Try Onomatopoeia.” A longer word gave him more chances to get things wrong but would his pride and his brain allow that? Apparently so. “O-N-O-M-” Gwil paused and thought for a second, his eyes narrowed as his looked at you, “O-N-O-M-A-T-O-P-I-A,” the last three letters were said with such deliberate diction that you knew he’d figured it out. “Good boy,” you said, letting your hands slip inside his undone pants to massage his dick. His hips jolted at the contact and he let his hands fall to your arse, squeezing. “What about, dactyl?” His reply was instant, unthinking, and totally correct, “D-A-C-T-Y-L,” You clicked your tongue condescendingly as you once again removed your hands from him. “Fuck,” “Well that’s what happens when you get things wrong, honey, and such an easy one too,” “I didn’t get it wro- fine, give me another,” You smiled, unable to hide how delighted you were that he was interested in following your rules, even if it was just his competitive streak rearing its head to show that he could out smart you, “Assonance,” Gwilym spelt the word slowly and carefully, making sure to only say one ‘s’ and to leave off the ‘e’. And you made sure to reward him for it, shuffling backwards on his lap so you could shimmy his pants down his thighs and wrap your hand around his cock. He raised an eyebrow at you but otherwise made no comment as he leant back in his seat to enjoy the attention. “Romanticism,” Once again Gwilym was careful with his spelling, intentionally replacing the ‘c’ with a double ‘s’ but that was the kind of behaviour you wanted to encourage so you kept stroking him off, twisting your wrist, dragging your thumb over his flushed tip. It must have felt good with the way he was sighing, shifting his shoulders as if to move his whole body closer to yours. “So clever baby, what about,” you paused, dredging up memories of poetry analysis and the words you used to have burned into your brain but which you’d not had much use for recently, “Enjambment” “Ummm, E-N,” Gwil hummed as you leant over him and let a trail of spit drip onto his cock, using your hand to spread it over his length, “Enjamb-ment, uh, E-N-J-A- no E, no A, M-E-N-T,” You leant into his ear and spoke softly, “That’s right, being so good for me, so clever. What should I do next though? Ride you? Or maybe suck you off? Or just keep doing this?” “Uh,” Gwilym shook his head a little as if to clear it, “mouth? Please?” “Of course, baby. If you can spell dissonance for me.” You were quietly confident that he’d get the spelling wrong, already noticing the first sign of his impending brainlessness, extra filler words where he’d normally not need them. It was funny though, usually he wouldn’t reach that stage until he was much closer to nutting. “D-I-S” he rushed through the first three letters and then stopped, biting his lip, “T-um, A-N-E-N-C-E.” You were sure the errors in that word were less intentional than the previous few and, as promised, slipped off his lap and settled yourself between his legs, pulling his pants off so he could spread them wider for you. You held eye contact as you let your tongue trail along the underside of his cock, tracing along a vein, though you couldn’t help but smile as he groaned above you. “Can you spell Decasyllable for me?” you asked before closing your lips around the head of his cock. “What? Oh, um, D-E-C-K- fuck,” he broke off as you swirled your tongue around his tip. “Fuck’s not a letter, baby,” you sank down on him again, bobbing a little lower. “I know, um, Deck-syllable, D-E-C-K-A-S-Y-B-L-E, I think. Is that right?” In answer you hummed and took him a little deeper, pushing his shirt up towards his chest. Gwilym took the hint and pulled it off before he grabbed your hair, leaning his head against the back of the couch. For a moment you just focused on sucking him off, listening to his shallow breathing and whiny groans. But you weren’t finished with your game yet.

“Epigraph?” you asked before bobbing down on him again, pushing yourself to take him deeper still. Gwilym remained silent as you gagged and pulled back from him again to breath freely. “Well?” “What did you say?” “Epigraph. Can you spell that?” He nodded as you resumed your bobbing, his hand grabbing at your hair, “E-P-P-E-G-R-A-F-F.” You hummed around him and his hips bucked up, pushing him further down your throat for a second. “No, don’t stop,” he whined under his breath as once again you let him fall from between your lips. “Sorry baby,” you wrapped your hand around his base and switched back to jerking him off, “you’re so hard though and I know you want to earn your orgasm like a good boy,” Gwilym nodded. “Okay, so spell meter,” “M- oh, I don’t know,” “You do know, baby, you just gotta try. Meter,” He scrunched his face up in thought, “M-E-E-T-R,” “See, I said you knew it, and you did it so well!” Gwilym gave you a dopey smile, looking proud at your praise, “I did?” His mouth dropped open with the movement of your hand. “Of course baby! You got it completely right because you’re so clever. What about sonnet, do you think you can do that one for me?” He nodded enthusiastically, “S-N-E-T,” “Very good! Okay, three more and I’ll let you cum,” “Okay!” “Okay, what about,” you thought for a moment, watching your hand pumping over his shaft as you trailed your fingernails lightly over his thigh, “Spell rhyme,” “Ummm,” Gwilym bit his lip in thought, soft grunting noises rising in his throat in time with your strokes. “It’s a bit of a tricky one,” “Yeah.” “And it’s hard to concentrate isn’t it?” “Mmhmm, so hard to con-ten-tate,” he thought for a little longer as you slowed your hand, “rrr- R-I-M,” “So clever baby! Okay canto,” “Oh! Ummm,” Gwilym pouted and whined as you unexpectedly drew the tip of your tongue around his head, “I don’ know,” “No?” He shook his head, eyebrows furrowed. “Okay what about, poem?” Gwilym seemed to have reached the last dregs of his knowledge, grunting in frustration as he shook his head again.” “You sure you don’t know?” He bucked his hips up into your hand as he shook his head again. “Alright, I’ll give you an easy one then. Spell your name for me, spell Gwilym,” Gwil’s eyes lit up at the suggestion but his face quickly slipped into a frown again, the expression getting more pronounced with every passing second he didn’t say anything. He sought out your face, his eyes brimming with frustrated tears, “I don’t…” his fists balled up as he looked to you for help. “You don’t remember?” He shook his head once more, a tear shaking loose and rolling down his cheek, “you said it was easy.” “It’s okay if you don’t know,” “Really?” he sniffled. “Of course it’s okay. You’re not supposed to know things.” “I’m not?” “Awww, of course not baby. That’s why I’m here, to know things, and you’re just here to make me happy.” Gwilym sighed and leaned back against the couch, smiling again. “Do you want to give it a try for me?” “Umm,” he whined as you slowed your strokes “It would make me very happy,” “Okay, umm…G? L? ummmm, M?” “You’re so clever, baby!” Gwilym giggled proudly and grinned at you as you adjusted your grip on his cock. “You’re my good, smart boy, aren’t you baby?” “Mmhmm,” he bucked his hips towards you as you took him into your mouth again. “Feels go-od,” he mumbled, almost panting with how close he was. You dragged the hand that rested on his thigh up to cup his balls as you sucked on his tip until he moaned and came, spilling his seed over your tongue.

You kept working your hand along his length, even after you’d pulled your mouth from him. “Was that a good orgasm baby? Did it make you feel good?” He nodded, pouting a little as you kept wanking him, “good oggsam,” It took all your effort not to laugh at that, biting on the inside of your cheek to keep from letting so much as a chuckle slip. Very few things delighted you as much as when Gwil forgot how to talk properly. “You know,” you said as you finally let his cock free, “sometimes when people have orgasms they feel euphoric. Do you feel euphoric?” “Mmhmm, you-porik.” “Clever boy. Do you want to help me feel euphoric?” “How?” “With your mouth,” “Oh! Okay!” You braced yourself against his knees as you stood, leaning forward to give Gwil a small kiss on the lips. He closed his eyes and smiled up at you contentedly as you shimmied out of your own clothes, dropping them all to the floor. “You going to let me lie down?” you asked, tapping Gwil on the shoulder. He looked around confusedly for a moment before his eyes settled on you, growing wider as he realised how naked you were. Without warning he surged forward, his hands grabbing your arse as he nuzzled his face in the valley between your breasts. If it were up to Gwil he would have stayed there all day but you had need for him elsewhere so you yanked his head back by his hair, earning a small noise of displeasure. “Don’t complain, baby. You want to make me feel euphoric, right?” “Mmhmm,” he hummed earnestly. “And how do you think you could do that?” “I don’t know,” “Maybe, cunnilingus?” “cun-un-un-un-gus,” “Exactly,” you directed his gaze down to your pussy, failing to hide your amused grin. But he was too far gone to notice, happily slipping to his knees in front of you. Telling him to wait for a second, you climbed onto the couch and spread your legs, beckoning him between them once you were comfortable.

He hadn’t been able to say the word but that didn’t mean he wasn’t skilled at the act. A string of soft hums and throaty sounds rose to your lips as he licked your cunt, the scratchy sensation of his beard only amplifying the soft, wet, warmth of his tongue.   “Can you, oh, can you spell poem for me baby?” Gwilym hummed and then started naming letters, his mouth still pressed against your cunt as if he didn’t realise he couldn’t talk and suck at the same time. You didn’t bother to stop him when he said too many letters or correct him when all of them were wrong. You just let his breath wash over you, his tongue flicking against your clit with each new letter, eliciting longer moans and sighs from you. “Fuck Gwil,” you panted, “keep going,” “Keep going,” he repeated, his voice muffled as he dragged his tongue all the way down your slit and then back up again, making you whine. You jolted when he reached your clit again and pressed against his head, keeping him close to you, your other hand trailing up your chest to tweak your nipples and knead your breasts. Occasionally you’d give him an instruction – “faster please,” or “do that again,” or “fuck Gwil, right there,” – and he’d repeat the words back to you, softened and often a little slurred together or mispronounced, before doing as he was asked, drawing you closer to release. He was pleased whenever another groan or mewl slipped from your lips, responding to them with sounds of his own as if he were savouring a particularly delicious meal. It seemed he’d taken what you’d said about making you happy to heart, though some of his whines might have had more to do with his cock, hard again and straining to be touched as his attention remained focused on you. “I’m c-lose ba-by,” you grunted as Gwilym pressed his mouth to your lower lips, as if to give you a soft chaste kiss, only to begin shaking his head side to side, rubbing his face against your cunt. “loase,” he muttered to himself, trailing his tongue back up to your clit, making you grind your hips up into him. It was impossible to keep your mouth shut in the face of such a feeling, wantonly moaning as you felt your orgasm bubbling to the surface. Gwilym hummed against you in response to a particularly loud moan which managed to be your undoing, your knees trying to clamp shut around his head as he continued to suck at your clit.

When you calmed enough to let go of his hair and loosen your thighs from around his ears, Gwilym looked up at you. His face was shiny and wet but he seemed to have regained some of his usual awareness. His eyes weren’t quite as vacant and his smile less dopey than it had been. “Feel good?” he asked, sounding almost normal except for a slight lightness in his tone. “Very good baby,” you leaned forward and kissed him full on the lips, tasting yourself as he opened his mouth and accepted your tongue. Slowly you dropped your hand between you, finding his cock again, not quite done with your brainless toy. He grunted against your lips and bucked into your hand as you stopped his return to sense. “Isn’t this fun?” you said softly as you pulled back, holding Gwil by the chin to stop him from trying to follow. “Yeah, fun,” a smile slowly tugging at his lips, “what is?” “Not needing to think, baby,” “Oh! Yes,” he laughed. “You’re too pretty to have a brain anyway, aren’t you? Much better off letting it leak out of your head,” “Mmhmm, much,” “And do you know what good, dumb boys get?” “No?” “They get fucked. Would you like that?” “Yes yes yes,” “Alright, lie back for me,” you chuckled, giving his cock a final stroke. Gwilym settled on the carpet on his back, grinning as you straddled his lap. Silently he held out his hand, all but two of his fingers folded against his palm. “No, I don’t need your fingers sweetie,” you said, giving the tips of his two fingers a light kiss, “as dextrous as they are and as much as I enjoy them, I think I’m okay skipping straight to your cock,” He nodded, letting you place his hand down on the floor again. You watched his face as you slowly sank down onto him, once again the picture of cunt drunk bliss with glazed eyes and his lip between his teeth. He smiled as you leaned down to kiss him, rolling your hips against his slowly. As you tongues entwined again, Gwilym framed your waist with his hands, slowly dragging them up your sides and onto your chest. He cupped each of your breasts in one of his palms, squeezing softly as you rocked forward and back. “Better than Byron isn’t this?” you asked, pushing yourself up a bit, but not so far you couldn’t kiss him again. “Wha’s Byron?” You laughed, “Y’know I think this might be the dumbest I’ve seen you. Can’t believe all it took was a rigged spelling test. He obviously didn’t understand, staring blankly back at you.

What he did understand was that you were moving further away from him and he whined as you pushed yourself to sit higher again, bracing your hands on his chest as you used your knees to raise and lower yourself. It still wasn’t enough though so you shifted again before too long, placing a hand behind you to grab Gwil’s leg. You leant back on it changing the angle of Gwilym’s cock, and felt his hands drop from your chest, no longer able to reach as easily. They came to rest on your leg, his fingertips digging into your skin as you rode him, keening as you felt the start of your orgasm building in the pit of your stomach. “Fuck Gwil, fill me so well, feels so good,” “My dex-ik-tus cock?” You couldn’t help but laugh, taken by surprise at his misunderstanding and mispronunciation of dextrous, but you nodded in agreement too, repeating your sentiments about how good it felt. “Wanna make me feel even better?” “How?” You sat forward again and reached for his hand, pulling it to your clit. Gwilym took the hint, messily rubbing as you bounced on his cock, but his whines and moans only grew as you rode him. “You’re close?” “Mmhmm,” You were on the verge of asking if he could hold it when he came with a groan, pulsing inside you. But you didn’t stop. “I’m close too, baby, so I’m gonna keep fucking you, okay?” He nodded, eyes fixed on you. “Good boy.” You panted, grabbing his wrist to hold his hand at your clit and adjusting your rhythm. Each time you sank back down onto him you did it harder, slamming his cock into you as deep as you could manage, groaning with each one. Your orgasm was frustratingly close but Gwilym was becoming steadily more sensitive as his subsided, wincing more with each of your thrusts. The winces turned to whimpers which turned to whines as you whispered that you were so close. “Almost baby, almost,” “Please. Hur’s,” “Nearly, just. One. More,” you threw your head back with a moan as you finally found your release, Gwil whining when you pulsed around him, a fresh tear running from the corner of his eye onto the carpet as he squirmed under you.

“Sorry, baby,” you said softly as you carefully dismounted him. He hummed as you kissed him again, leaving an extra kiss against the tip of his nose. “Did so well, such a good boy for me,” “Yeah?” “Mmhmm, so good,” He gave you a slightly watery smile and let you pull him into a cuddle, sighing contentedly when you brushed your fingers through his hair. You stayed like that for a while, knowing that later you’d regret lying on the floor for so long but unable to find the energy to move or the willpower to tell Gwilym you had to let him go. He gradually lost the fucked out expression, becoming more aware of his surroundings and more capable of clear speech. “How are you feeling?” you asked when you realised he’d blinked away the last of his sex drunk vacancy. “Better than before. Little tired but much more relaxed and very satisfied. And, before you ask, yes that’s satisfied and yes I can spell it if you want,” “I believe you.”

[hydeanachronism]

Hello, Icarus! Please infodump to me about Danganronpa?

okay so! I had written out a whole thing but then tumblr deleted it! so that was fun! /s but now that I know what I'm going to write it's much easier, so that's good 😌

n e ways, I'm gonna do like a basic timeline w explanations and some other stuff that hopefully I'll remember once I start writing!! so let's go :D

a list of everything danganronpa in chronological order (not the order that you should play/watch the stuff in, I'll put that in the explanations)

Danganronpa 3: The End of Hope's Peak High School - Despair Arc (DR3) - second anime, watch along with the Future and Hope arcs after playing the first two games (and UDG if you want to). backstory for the cast of the second game.

Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc (THH) - first main game, play first. also has an anime that's basically the same as the game, but since there's not enough time to put everything from the game into the anime I definitely recommend playing the game. high school students from a prestigious school trapped in said school are forced to play a killing game, hijinks ensue.

Danganronpa Another Episode: Ultra Despair Girls (UDG) - third game, not main. play after playing the first two games. very different game mechanics from the main three, and widely considered not cannon by the fandom. I like it though, and it introduces a lot of really interesting characters along with giving a v underdeveloped character from the first game a lot more character development. it's not necessary to play it (though one of the characters plays a pretty big part in the third anime, so that would make more sense if you already knew her), but I think it's interesting and fun. there are also robot fights.

Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair (DR2 or SDR2) - second main game, play after playing the first game. same basic premise as the first game, except it's a different class (same school though) and this time they're on an island. even more hijinks and plot twists than the first game.

Super Danganronpa 2.5: Komaeda Nagito to Sekai no Hakaimono - (I could only find the Japanese title for this one, sorry 😔) kinda also part of the second anime? watch after playing the first two games (and UDG if you want) and watching DR3. character is woken up from a coma via overdramatic and overpowered other character.

Danganronpa 3: The End of Hope's Peak High School - Future and Hope Arcs (DR3) - second anime, watch along with the Despair arc after playing the first two games (and UDG if you want to). aftermath of the first two games.

Danganronpa V3: Killing Harmony (DRV3) - third main game, fourth game in total. I don't actually know when it happens bc they're v secretive about everything, so I'm just putting it last. play last. same premise as the first two, the class is trapped in a school with a courtyard and a huge sort of dome around everything. peak hijinks, too many plot twists to count.

woo!! that's the timeline as I know it, hopefully I didn't miss anything. and I have managed to remember what else I was going to say, so let's move on to section two:

the mechanics of the games

danganronpa is, at its core, a glorified visual novel. every character has a certain amount of sprites for when they talk, as well as voice lines that aren't usually the exact text on the screen but fit the vibe of whatever they're saying. and as I've said before, there's quite a lot of talking. these games have more plot than should really be possible and most or all of it is done through dialogue. cutscenes and class trials are the only parts that are reliably fully voice acted, but there are a lot of those.

as for the parts that are less visual novel-y: you can walk around, and the settings are pretty much as 3d as the 2d-ish style of the game allows. you can also click on things, and sometimes clicking on stuff will get you monocoins, the currency of the game, which means you'll be able to buy presents for the characters!!

"now why do I need presents for the characters?" you ask. well, that's because you're given a certain amount of free time each game to hang out with characters you want to get to know better! the game's ending is fixed, so you won't change the course of the game by who you do or don't hang out with, but you can learn more about characters and become closer to them! giving them presents they like makes them like you more :D

and the most exciting part of danganronpa, what a lot of people play the games for, the true lure of the game.... the class trials!!

so these characters are in a killing game, right? basically, they're faced with a sort of lose-lose predicament: stay trapped in the school forever, or kill one of your classmates to "graduate". but it's not as simple as that, because in order to graduate, you can't be caught. and how do you determine whether or not a criminal has been found out? well, a trial of course!

enter the class trials. every student (barring dead or severely wounded ones) is required to participate in a kind of mock trial- except someone's really dead, and they need to find the murderer or they'll all die too.

(right, did I forget to mention that? only one person can graduate. getting out alive insures that none of your classmates get the luxury of doing the same.)

so, yeah. the class trials are a true fight for life on both sides, because who ever loses will be executed.

and they're really, really fun.

entirely voice acted! enough minigames that the list of them is probably longer than this entire post! the joy of solving the mystery! the... execution, right in front of everyone.

hey, it's a dark game. not like they're trying to hide that. and the executions aren't actually all that gory most of the time, but they're still very much there and onscreen. also as close to fully animated as the games ever get, which is pretty cool.

so how the class trials work is this:

there's a murder. dun dun duuuun. you investigate everywhere related to the murder to get "truth bullets", which are the reason you don't immediately fail at the trials. you don't have to remember all of them, they're all written down in your e-handbook. plus, the protagonists all seem to have really good memories.

time for the actual class trial!! Monokuma (asshole bear running the killing game) introduces everything, explains the rules. and everyone starts talking.

there are a lot of different parts to the class trial, but most of it is "nonstop debates". everyone talks one after the other, and you have to find inconsistencies and shoot the right "weak spot" with the right truth bullet. you refute the lie or mistake and everyone goes back to arguing normally.

there's also hangman's gambit (weird hangman to find a key word), multiple choice things (self-explanatory), and plenty of others.

near the end of the trial (or sometimes only a little over halfway in, it varies), the killer will.... kind of become obvious. there's a specific kind of change in behavior that's the mark of the murderer in these games, but I'm not sure how to describe it exactly. a lot of times there's an accent change, and in general they start acting much more erratic. since it's a trial, though, even after this presents itself you still have to prove your case beyond reasonable doubt.

and once it's become clear to the killer that they're backed into a corner, you have to do the "bullet time battle". it goes by different names in different games, but the basic mechanics are the same: you battle against a student (usually the killer, but not always) in a rhythm-based battle where you have to click to the rhythm to refute your opponent's statements. once you've dealt enough damage, you shoot the final piece of evidence, and that's the end of it.

the murderers react differently different times. sometimes they break down and confess. sometimes they keep denying it. sometimes, they're just calm. however they act, though, the end is the same. they are caught and punished accordingly.

but before that, there's one more thing to do. the closing argument.

your final task is to explain how the murder was committed, from idea to execution (look, a pun! see I can be funny too 😌). and you have to do it... as a manga.

you don't have to draw the whole thing yourself ofc- you just have to fill in the missing panels and then watch as the protagonist narrates it to the rest of the class.

and that's all for the class trial, not counting the long talks after every execution while still in the courtroom.

wow, this is getting...... really, really long. there's only one more thing I'm gonna add, and I promise it will be much shorter than the other two bc it is late and I am officially Incredibly Fucking Tired.

with no further ado, a very short part three:

my general impression of the game. its vibes or smth, I dunno this is just what i think about it

when I first heard of danganronpa, I thought it was a horror game. I can now assure you that it is not. thriller? maybe. debatable. but definitely not horror.

and despite its extremely dark premise, this game is not all doom and gloom. there's so much stuff about hope, and overcoming despair even when it seems impossible... it's not exactly a happy game, but there's a lot more of that in there than you'd probably expect.

all in all, I love this game. so much. it means a lot to me, and I think it's a really good game. thanks for letting me talk about it so much asdhfd :D

[siren-queen-imagines]

Fluff Alphabet: Zach Dempsey

My first 13 Reasons Why imagine!! Hope you guys like it!!! If you do, expect more! I have one planned for Justin next! Also, such a tragedy of the small amount of Zach imagines on here! How can anyone resist that adorable face?

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about you?): Zach has always been in love with that smile of yours. It’s so contagious and he appreciates that your gorgeous smile can always make him. But also, if he had to go with that same question but one of the guys asked? Your butt. He love the butt.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?): Absolutely. Zach would love a family with you one day. Maybe not in the near future considering the fact that you guys haven’t graduated high school yet but definitely one day. He’s always loved kids and being able to have and care for a little sister made him see that he would love to have some of his own one day...and he hoped you would still be together for that.

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?): Zach LOVES cuddling with you. He’s very affectionate with you so sometimes he’ll come up from behind you while you’re at your locker and wrap his arms around you. Granted he’s taller, but should he choose to bend down a bit, his arms will find your waist. If not, his arms will wrap around or rest on your shoulders as he holds you close.

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?): Dates with Zach tend to be pretty low key events. Sure, he’ll take you out every now and then, but he prefers to stay in and watch movies or play games and have dinner. You guys spend so much time around everyone at school that it’s nice to have it just be the two of you. Regardless, you always have fun with Zach. Last date night, you both disastrously tried cooking dinner for yourselves and ended up ordering pizza instead. Despite all the cleaning, you guys found ways to have a good time while doing so. 

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…)): My Queen and My Sunshine. Zach tends to call you both of those nicknames. You are the queen of his heart and bring sunshine to his life, especially on the days that aren’t so great.

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?): It was a random moment. He’s always liked you and that grew but love...that was maybe four months into your relationship.You guys went out to a movie and had dinner at Rosie’s right after. You guys had went to see the new Avengers movie that had come out. You guys had a debate about Star Lord being the main cause of the snap because he interfered in the removal of the infinity gauntlet when it was thisclose to being removed. You were trying to make him see that he was emotional, and yes he was wrong but he reacted the loss of Gamora the way anyone else would. Your argument was so passionate and it shone in your eyes. It was just that moment he knew...it was love.

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?): Zach? Oh yeah, he gentle. Especially in football, he’s used to the roughness of sports. He doesn’t want you to feel that. Plus, it’s just nice for him to have to not feel that with someone. One of his favorite things to do while you guys are relaxing is run his fingers through your hair as you practically use him as a pillow. Your hair is so soft and smooth, he wants to make sure to be gentle enough to keep it that way. There was also this one time in PE class that you had scraped up your arm. The way he touched you...feather light as he tried to clean the broken skin. 

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?): Zach always holds hands with you. When you’re standing side by side? He’ll always seek out your hand. His fingers will always lace with yours. Or he’ll put his arm around your shoulders and hope you’ll lace your fingers with his and rest like that. 

I = Impression (What was their first impression?): His first impression of you happened to be something similar to most people. You seemed nice but he didn’t know you really. He thought you were cute too. It wasn’t until you guys were partnered up on a project when you got to know each other and he developed a crush on you apart from the fact that you were attractive.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?): Zach trusts you implicitly. He knows you don’t like to play games so his jealousy isn’t too bad. He’s not much of a jealous person. It only perks up when someone, say like Bryce, Montgomery or even Justin, decide to flirt with you. He just doesn’t like it because they know you’re with him.

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?): Your first kiss only happened because you took the first initiative. Zach seemed so nervous and didn’t want to put you in the position where maybe you didn’t want him to kiss you so he would hold back. It wasn’t until date three you couldn’t handle it and kissed him. Zach’s kisses are soft but it’s weird that he can convey his feelings out in a soft kiss like he does. He tends to weave his fingers into your hair when it deepens, his free hand resting on your waist.

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?): Despite you initiating the first kiss, Zach was the first to say “I love you”. It wasn’t long after he realized it that he said it. He was nervous and made sure you knew that it was okay that you didn’t feel the same way at the time but he needed to get it off his chest. You saw the tension leave his shoulders when he said it and the breath you didn’t realize he was holding come out when you said it back.

M = Memory (What’s their favourite memory together?): One of his favorite memories of his was the day he treated you and his little sister, May, to the carnival that came to town. His mom had to do something at the last minute and got Zach to take care of May...problem was, it was on the night you were supposed to go on a date to the carnival. He was so grateful that you told him to bring May along as it would be good for you and her to get to know each other. He still finds himself looking back on the pictures of that day and the giant smiles on both his favorite girl’s faces. May always looks forward to the chance of hanging out with you and Zach. 

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?): Zach definitely likes to spoil you. But his gifts tend to always have some story or thought behind them...like they’re a reminder of some sort of a funny joke or moments you spent together. He knows you don’t need everything to be happy and loves that about you. If he can, he’ll always try to make a gift for you.

O = Orange (What color reminds them of their other half?): Your favorite color always reminds him of you for obvious reasons. Another will always be your eye color. Whenever it happens to show up, he always imagines your eyes looking back at him in the way you reserve for him.

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?): When he doesn’t call you his queen or his sunshine, he’ll call you the most basic nickname: babe. 

Q = Quaint (What is their favourite non-modern thing?): When it comes to your relationship, Zach’s favorite non-modern thing to do  is to write you love letters and send them to you in the mail. He tends to do it that way because he likes that it’ll always surprise you and it’s something you can save. He once even used a cassette tape to record you a mixtape to go along with one of your letters. 

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?): Rainy days in your guy’s town usually tend to be cold. So when he spends them with you, he’ll make sure you two are all bundled up with some blankets and some tea or hot chocolate. Then you guys will either play board games or watch some movies.

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?): Zach cheers himself up the same way he tends to cheer others up: trying to make them smile or laugh. If Zach is alone, he’ll see if a comedy movie will do the trick. If he’s with someone who needs cheering up, he’ll try to find a way to at least put a smile on their face. He likes the fact that in turn usually he’ll hear what’s bothering the person. For Zach, if the movie doesn’t work, he’ll go for a drive in an effort to clear his head. Or he’ll call you and talk it out. 

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?): Zach likes to talk about a lot of things but his mind will either turn to the current sports season or his future. He wants to be a marine biologist so sometimes random fun facts will come out of his mouth, especially when you guys are studying together and he happens to be working on biology. He also likes to talk about May with you. You can tell how much he cares about her by the way he speaks of her.

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?): When he’s alone, Zach relaxes with a video game or reading a book. When he’s with you, he likes to lay in your lap while you play with his hair. The gentleness of it all sometimes puts him to sleep.

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?): Like a typical guy, Zach liked to show off his car. Who could blame him, that thing was a beaut. But he was also proud of anything that had to do with the sports he played. He took pride in hard work and anything that came from it, he was proud of. 

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?): Zach doesn’t know when he’ll propose to you. You guys are still in high school, but he knows he will someday. But he does know how he’ll do it. No matter where the two of you end up, he’ll always bring you back to the spot he learned about from his relationship with Hannah. It was a dock and it overlooked the water. He would take you there and most likely go into this big speech about how much he loves you and how he’s been so happy with you before he decides to get down on one knee and ask that scary but amazing question.

X = Xylophone (What’s their song?): ‘Build You Up’ by Kamaiyah. He just can’t explain why but it resonates with him. You know why though. Part of you knows that it reminds him of Hannah. But also how he felt after his dad passed away that he needed from his mom.

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?): Absolutely. He knew he’d get married one day but it really came to a head when he realized he loved you. He truly hopes that you’ll be the one he marries and spends the rest of his life with. He wants to propose to you...he doesn’t know when but he will. Sometimes he doesn’t care that the two of you are in high school and maybe you two can just have a long engagement. Just knowing the commitment between the two of you is there will hold him over until the wedding day.

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?): Zach would definitely get a dog. He wouldn’t be picky on the breed. He’d just want a dog that he can play with and even have a running partner when he works on his cardio. Last he checked, all dogs tick those boxes. Hopefully, he’ll get to share the pet parenting with you.

[lovemesomesurveys]

“I’m going to stand on the ground like a skyscraper”

Is there a necklace that you wear all the time? No. I haven’t worn a necklace in years. How often do you wear skirts? Never. Do you enjoy baking? I used to, especially during the holidays. I haven’t done any baking the past few years, though. Do you have a large kitchen? No, it’s really small. Is anything sore on your body at the moment? Of course.

Do you like 3D movies? No. Where were you 3 hours ago? Sitting right here on my bed. Have you ever heard of Hot Chelle Rae? Yeah. I liked a couple of their songs. Do you know where Poland is? I know it’s in Europe. Are you afraid of dying? Yes. Are you wearing socks right now? Always. Do you speak your mind? I keep a lot to myself. If you found a wounded bird, what would you do? I honestly don’t know. I’ve never encountered a wounded bird. Ever rode on an elephant? No. Have you ever had braces? Yes, but not for my teeth.

“Cause I finally realize that I can’t get you off my mind”

Have you ever eaten a crayon? No. Do you like strawberries? Yeah. I haven’t had any in years, though. Wrestling or boxing? Neither. When's the last time you went to the mall? Last December. Have you ever gone Christmas Caroling? I have, actually. A few of us from the psych club I was in at my community college went caroling one year to a few different nursing homes. It was nice, they seemed to enjoy it. What song do you never get tired of? There’s numerous songs that will always be a favorite of mine. Do you have a favorite chef? No. Do you know who Travis Pastrana is? Yeah. What song pumps you up and makes you feel good? Hmm. What's bothering you right now? My back and the fact that I don’t feel well.

Favorite flavor of gum? Minty flavors. Does your school have air conditioning? How many mirrors do you have in your home? 5 that I know of for sure. That doesn’t include handheld mirrors, though. What does your wrapping paper look like for presents this year? I haven’t bought any, yet. Do you like Jay-Z? I’ve only liked a couple of his songs. However, the Linkin Park and Jay-Z collab album was/is dope.

“we’re gonna party like it’s your birthday”

What time was it 14 hours ago? 5:30PM. What's the craizest thing that happens in your hometown? Uh, high crime rates. :X Have any of your friends ever stabbed you in the back? Yes. What's your favorite city? Beachy, touristy cities throughout California. Have you ever laid on a hammock? I think I have as a kid. Who's the most famous person you met? Jamie Lee Curtis. Have you ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend stolen from you? No. Where do you want to live someday? Near the beach. I’d love to have a beach home one day. Do you like your eyes? I wish I had blue or green eyes instead. Do you wear a watch? Nope. Do you like peanut butter? Yes. Do you tan easily? If I spend a day at the beach I’ll sunburn and then it turns into a tan. That’s the only time I spend a long period of time outdoors. Do you have sensitive skin? Yes. Do you care if people smoke/drink? Not in general, no. If it becomes a problem then yes. Has anyone ever gives you roses? Nope.

“every little thing that you do, I’m amazed by you”

How many hours of sleep did you get last night? Sigh. I dozed off around 5AM and slept until 7AM and here we are now at 7:53AM. I don’t understandddd. D: I’m going to definitely attempt more sleep, but I have to call my doctor soon. Do you hate it when babies cry? If it’s loud and excessive it gets overwhelming and annoying. Would you like to get snake bites? (the piercing) Not now, but I wanted them back when I was like 16.  Would you move to a new state/country to be with the one you love? That’s one of those situations I’d have to be in to know what I’d do. It’s hard for me to even imagine cause I’ve never even been close to that before. It’s also hard for me to imagine ever moving far away from my family. I think I’d try to work something else out to be honest. Like, maybe they wouldn’t mind picking up and moving here? Why would I have to move?  What is your name? Stephanie. What do you plan on buying in the future? Christmas presents for my fam soon. Who is your favorite "That '70 Show" character? I don’t have one. I actually watched that show during its original run, but I tried again years later when I was older and couldn’t get into it. There is a mummy behind you. What do you do? Uh, run? What do you think of Miley Cyrus? I like her. Do you tend to think you are always right? Absolutely not. What was your favorite toy as a child? Barbies. I was obsessed. Do you think more about your funeral or wedding? Uh, neither.  Dinosaurs or unicorns? Unicorns, I guess. You need new jeans. Where do you go? I haven’t bought a new pair of jeans in years. I’d probably look at JCP first since that’s where I used to get them. I always found the perfect fit there. What do you think about Maroon 5? I like a lot of their music.

“someone pinch me, I must be dreaming again”

Have you ever snuck into an R-rated movie when you weren't old enough? Nah. How many Emily's do you know? I don’t know any. Have you ever slept in a tent outside? No. What's your favorite kind of Girl Scout cookie? I like all of ‘em really except for the coconut ones. Their newer cookie, Lemonades, are quite delicious. What do you hear at the moment? An ASMR video. Why do you think a lot of people left Myspace for Facebook? Facebook became cooler for some reason. I remember not wanting to make the move at all, I thought Facebook was lame lol. I just did it because everyone literally left. I don’t know about everyone else, but when it happened for me it was soon after graduating high school and Facebook was for college students, so I guess we just graduated from Myspace or something. *shrug* It’s crazy how quickly it flip flopped, though. Myspace became lame and now we all kinda laugh about it. Do you watch the Olympics? Nope. Have you ever been to Minnesota? No. What's the strangest thing you've seen on TV? Hmm. What do you miss most about elementary school? I miss being elementary school ages the most, but also school was fun back then. I liked the projects and music class and this thing called field day that we did on the last day of school every year that consisted of like relay games and whatnot. It was fun. Anything funny happen to you while you were at Wendy's? Uhh, no. I very rarely even go to Wendy’s. It’s been awhile. When's the last time you picked up a stick? I have no idea.

How often do you have camp fires? Never. I’d like to do bonfires in the fall.

“honestly, I haven’t been happy for a long time”

How long has your computer been on? Hours. Do you like chips and salsa? I used to love chips and salsa. I can’t eat spicy food anymore, though. :( Do you have any pictures of the guy you like? There’s no such guy at the moment. Ever touched a fish? I don’t think so. Maybe as a kid with my pet fish. When's the last time you uploaded pictures onto Facebook or Myspace? I uploaded a new profile picture last month on Facebook. Do you have any band-aids on right now? Nope. Ever had a blister? Yes. Not fun. Do you watch the show The Hard Times or RJ Berger? No. Have you ever voted for anything? Yeah, for elections and other smaller stuff. Do you like high top shoes? I can’t wear them cause they’re hard for me to get my foot into. Do you think those nerd glasses are cool? What are nerd glasses, exactly?

Do you own any t-shirts of your favorite band/singer? Yes. Have you ever worn a tie? No. Have you ever made dinner for someone? No, cause I don’t cook. Do you only listen to your muisc loud? No. I like to listen to it at a comfortable level. It varies, but never super loud.

“my give a damn’s busted”

Have you ever taken drama class? I actually did take two drama classes in community college. :O Shocking, I know. Have you ever rode a mechanical bull? Nooo. That would be very dangerous for me to do and I’d never even attempt it. Have you ever played on a basketball team? No. Ever stayed in a motel? Yes. What number was your jersey in high school? I didn’t have a jersey, I didn’t play any sports. Have you ever choked on something? Yes. I had one really traumatic experience that changed how I take my medicine ever since. That happened almost 10 years ago now, but ever since I’ve had to crush my pills. When I tried taking pills again not long after it happened, it literally felt like my throat was closing up every time and I was terrified of it getting lodged again. That day was really scary, my dad literally almost had to put his finger down my throat. Do you wear a belt? Nope, I only ever wear leggings. I’ve actually never worn a belt before, though. Do you have a rug in your room? No. Do you go camping during the summer? Nope. I have no interest at all in doing that. Do you carry a purse everywhere you go? Not anymore, but I used to. In most recent years it was a mini backpack. Where's your favorite place to get coffee? Honestly, I’m a basic bitch and just go to Starbucks, ha. It’s nearby and convenient and yeah. Plus, people hate on it but I actually like it. *shrug* I get really into it when they come out with their winter drinks, like they have now. I wish we had a Tim Hortons so I can see what that hype is all about. What's the last time you searched on Google? When’s the last time I searched on Google? Earlier. Which of these singers have the best voice: Katy Perry or Usher? I think they both sing well. They’re very different, you can’t really compare. What food is your weakness? Boneless garlic parm and lemon pepper wings from Wingstop. How many unread emails do you have right now? I don’t feel like checking at the moment.

[romansrgn]

   ch. 6

taglist: @queenofthearchitect @calicina @never-sawft-princess @5dsinyourdirection @fancybarbii @aria725  @lustyromantic   @kai1996en @angelbaby908  @rebellious-desires @romans-empire-baby​

   "I got everything you asked for including the extra lawn chairs. How many people are you expecting anyway?"

Braelin stirred the baked beans before putting them back in the oven "Thirty give or take."

"Thirty?"

"Look, obviously it's getting harder to hide my pregnancy. I'm gaining two pounds a day and I haven't even entered my third trimester. So I figured I get it over with and let everyone know before they hear it from someone else."

Briyanna nodded "Is Roman coming?"

"Yea, he's coming."

"Do you think that's a good idea?"

Braelin laughed almost nervously "No, but I extended the invitation to him a while ago so it would be weird if I went back on it. Besides, his mom and sisters are flying in as well."

Briyanna knew that Braelin didn't always have the best judgment when it came to anything pertaining to Roman and inviting Roman and his family to this barbecue has proven to be no different. Her first instinct as the big sister was to intervene but at the same time, she knew what stress could do to a pregnant woman so she decided it was probably best not to add to it.

Braelin peeked over her shoulder at her big sister who was noticeably quiet "I know what you're thinking."

                    "I'm sure you do but in the event of full disclosure, I think this could get hella messy. But I want you to know that this is a celebration for your and you're—"

"Twins, I'm having twins."

Briyanna's eyes widen "What?"

Braelin nodded rubbing her belly "There's two growing in here."

"I'm— I don't. Are you ok with this?"

Braelin shrugged "I'm ok with it now that I've had time to process it. One was a lot but two almost seemed like too much to handle. But I'm grateful for this journey. I feel like I have a purpose outside of wrestling now that my career is basically over."

"I still think you're giving it too much. Your career is far from over."

"It's definitely shortened thanks to my knee injury but I'm ok. I want to raise my kids."

Briyanna smiled at hearing that. It's only been a few short months and it's obvious that this pregnancy is doing wonders for her sister's maturity. "Well, whatever you decide I'm here for you and" she jumped off the counter to place kisses all over her sisters baby bump "my little munchkins."

Keyon took a moment to assist the scene between his little sisters "Did I miss something?"

Braelin sighed "Nothing, outside the fact that I'm pregnant with twins."

 Keyon practically threw the grocery bags on the table before swinging Braelin around in his arms "Baby sister! Are you good? I mean are you aight? You need me to get you something?"

Braelin laughed because Keyon reacted just like this after finding out about all three of Briyanna's kids "I'm tired and hungry all of the time but other than that I'm ok."

"I'm assuming Mama and Daddy don't know yet?"

Braelin shook her head walking over to retrieve the bags from the table "No, that's why I'm having this barbecue so please don't say anything."

Keyon held up his hands "I won't. But I do want y'all to know that mama finna look at me sideways since y'all have given her grandbabies and I didn't."

Briyanna rolled her eyes "I'm sure there are probably six or seven different mini Keyon's running around here somewhere. You hoe."

Braelin threw her head back and laughed. Keyon, on the other hand, look almost affronted "First of all, I don't dip my—"

Briyanna held up her hand "Don't even go there."

Keyon winked "So how does Big D feel about being a father."

Braelin's eyes widen "He's—"

"Surprised." Dante said wrapping both arms around his girl's waist "It's almost as if it's happening to someone else. But the best thing about this is, is that I've got our future mapped out so I couldn't be more excited about this new journey." he said looking down at his baby girl "I'm not going anywhere."

Braelin smiled before kissing him on the lips. Could this man be any more perfect?

"I'm happy for yall. For real." Keyon said before giving Dante a bro hug "Welcome to the family."

"We're not engaged."

"Y'all created a life together that bond is more divine than any marriage in my opinion."

Briyanna who noticed how tense Braelin had suddenly gotten thought it was time to change the subject "Keyon, Zayden will be here soon so I think you and Dante should get started on the grill."

Keyon rolled his eyes "Damn, just say you want us to leave and we'll leave."

Briyanna balled up a piece of aluminum foil and tossed it at her big brother's head.

Dante laughed, grabbing the rack of ribs and seasoning following Keyon outside the door.

"Thank you," Braelin mumbled.

"No problem. Was that always the plan?"

Braelin ran a hand through her hair "No, but I mean people are going to assume, right? I mean since Dante and I are together—"

"No one would expect the alternative and if you're not ready to come clean this is probably what's best."

Braelin nibbled on her bottom lip. There was no way Roman was going to go along with this especially since he has every intention of telling the truth when the time was right. But what about her? was she really willing to take on that kind of stress? She was never one to back down but this was something she couldn't defend or was willing to do so.

"I think this is for the best. I'll talk to them both tonight before making the announcement."

Briyanna wrapped her arms around her baby sister. She knew this wasn't going to be easy on anyone but it had to be done.

Janelle was always a person who thought of herself as a woman who was sought after. She was a strong, beautiful, intelligent, hardworking and self-made career woman. She was the total package. Any man in their right mind would kill to have a woman like her carrying their last name. So you can imagine her surprise that her husband and college sweetheart cheated on her not once but twice with the same woman. Hearing that kind of shit opened a door full of insecurities that she never knew existed. Roman claimed that the other woman didn't mean anything to him. Apparently, they had a few drinks at a bar a few months ago after a house show and one thing led to another. That, of course, didn't give him a pass especially since he somehow managed to fuck the same woman while she was away in Seattle. But she prayed on it and left it to god to determine what was next for her and Roman and right now he was telling her not to give up on her marriage.

"I forgive you."

Roman looked over at her in the passenger seat "What?"

"I hate what you did and there's a part of me that wants to hurt you the way you hurt me, but— I can't. I know It's going to take me a while to trust you but I think what we have is worth fighting for."

"We'll talk about it after the party."

Janelle frowned "That's all you have to say to me?"

Roman shook his head "I'm not trying to upset you and that's why I think we should discuss this later. Now it is about having a good time with our friends and family, Can we do that?"

Janelle didn't look at all placated but she nodded anyway. The rest of the drive to Braelin's house was filled with silence.

  "I brought chips and your favorite dessert."

Braelin beamed "Upside down Pineapple cheesecake!  What did I do to deserve this?"

Patricia wrapped the small woman in a hug "Consider this a gift for a woman who has everything."

"I don't have everything. At least not everything I want."

Sika walked before walking into the kitchen "Well, isn't that a loaded statement."

"I'm just saying that a girl can have more if she wants. All she has to do is—"

"Work a little harder."

Braelin smiled at the new guest "Hi, daddy!"

Richard placed the large bowl potato salad down on the counter before kissing the young woman on the forehead  "I was wondering when you were finally going to throw a cookout in this big ole palace you call a house."

Braelin rolled her eyes "Daddy, please. This is no palace, you and mama are living larger than I am."

"Well, when you're mama finally retires we'll be living somewhere in the Bahamas like we planned on after you kids graduated from college."

"We told you to say the word and we can have you and mama living on a yacht in no time."

Richard grinned at Roman "You've always been a good man" he said pulling Roman into a hug. "How are you doing, son?"

 "I'm good, Pop. What about you?"

Richard shrugged "I don't have to cook so I'm doing great."

Carol cut her eye at her husband "And who said you weren't going to cook Richard?"

Richard gave Sika a look who laughed "Well, a man can dream. Come on Sika. Let's go see what theses boys are out here burning up."

Patricia shook her head "How are you doing sweetheart?"

Roman kissed his mother on the cheek "I'm fine mom."

Braelin looked between Roman and Patricia and thought it was best to leave them alone "Mama can you help me finish setting up outside?" Carol nodded before following her daughter outside.

Patricia grabbed her son's face when his eyes remained trained on Braelins retreating frame "Is that what's bothering you?"

"No, Janelle and I are having a hard time getting this family thing started. That's all."

"Well, these things don't happen overnight for some people but I'm sure it'll happen soon enough."

Roman wanted nothing more than to tell his mother the truth about his impending fatherhood but it wasn't the right time. Not until he talked to Braelin about their next steps.  "Maybe you're right."

"You haven't realized by now that mama always knows best."

Roman smiled pulling his mother into a hug.

Janelle made a plate of fruit salad before sitting down at the long table. Naomi, who joined the party along with Jimmy, Jey, Jey's wife Tamika and Rikishi about an hour ago sat down next to her.

"A penny for your thoughts?"

Janelle smiled sadly "I'm just—do you ever feel like you're in a battle you can't win. Even when you didn't know it was a battle, to begin with?"

Naomi sat back in her chair "It depends on the situation. I feel like that all-time in my career. As gifted as I know I am, I'm always overlooked. I start thinking maybe I'm not as good as I think I am or that maybe someone else has that something I don't. But doubting myself does more for the people who want to see me lose than myself. I know what I'm worth and my goal is to make sure everyone else sees it and not forgets it."

Janelle soaked up Naomi's words "Thank you. That really helped."

Naomi squeezed Janelle's hand "I'm glad I can help."

Naomi knew Janelle was feeling unsure of herself at the moment. She also knew that Janelle was a smart woman. Janelle knew there was something off with her husband and despite how accurate she might be Janelle keeping Roman is what was best for everyone and she may not realize it now but it's definitely what's best for Braelin.

Dante walked into the kitchen with an empty bowl of barbecue sauce. "Everyone looks like they're having a good time."

Braelin smiled up at him "I'm glad. With everything that's happening I'm glad I can make this happen."

Dante kissed her lips "You taste like peaches."

Braelin pushed him playfully "Behave. My parents are outside."

Dante smirked down at his little beauty "Is that a challenge?"

Braelin squealed attempting to run away from her boyfriend but was quickly caught and pulled into his arms "I'm going to tell everyone about the babies."

"Are you?"

Braelin nodded "and I think we should tell everyone you're the father of my babies."

Dante raised a brow "What did Roman say?"

"What did Roman say about what?"

Braelin practically jumped at the sound of his voice "Damn it, Roman. Where the hell did you come from?"

Roman ignored her question instead of looking in between Dante and Braelin "Do I know what?"

Braelin sighed "I'm telling everyone tonight that I'm pregnant and I think— I think it's best if we tell them Dante is the father."

Roman's jaw clenched "There's no way that's fucking happening."

"It's probably what's best for every—"

"You're trying to have another man replace me as the father my fucking kids. Mine." he hissed.

"Their not fucking toys, Rome." Dante hissed back.

Braelin looked at Dante who was getting angry himself. She thought it was time to intervene "Ok, listen. I know this isn't ideal and it feels like I'm hitting you guys with bullshit after bullshit but what else can we do that wouldn't make this harder for everyone else?"

Roman ran a hand across his beard "This isn't about everyone else this is about our family."

"And whether or not you want to admit it I'm a part of the family and  in case you need further calcification I'm not going anywhere." Dante chimed.

Roman only laughed taking a step towards the couple "That's your plan, big D. You think you can replace me in her life?"

Dante shook his head stepping around Braelin "I'm not the biological father of her kids. You hold that honor but she's my girlfriend and whether you like it or not that's my honor playboy."

Braelin went to intervene "Guys—"

Keyon stepped in the kitchen "Y'all good?"

Braelin sighed in relief "Are the ribs done?"

Keyon looked between Dante and Roman and back again at Braelin "You ok baby sis?"

"I'm fine. I'm just hella hungry right now. " She said leaving the kitchen to join the party that seemed oblivious to the tension that was happening inside the kitchen.

Dante went to follow Braelin but Keyon stopped him "Listen, I don't know what's going on between y'all three but whatever it is y'all need figure out a way to deal with it. Braelin is pregnant and the last thing she needs is all this extra bullshit between y'all stressing her out."

Roman knew Keyon was doing what any big brother did and that was protecting his sister and for that, he couldn't be more thankful to Keyon as a man and as a father. Roman looked over at Dante who was clearly having similar thoughts. "You don't have to worry about that. We all want what's best for Brae and I think I can speak for everyone when I say we'll do damn near anything to ensure she's getting the best. Now if you don't excuse me those ribs are calling me."

"What was that about?"

Dante picked up a new bowl of barbecue sauce before heading outside  "You heard what Rome said. We all just want the best for Braelin."

Keyon didn't know what the hell was going on but he was definitely going to find out.

"Why are you so quiet?"

Braelin added more fruit to the already thinning fruit salad "What are you talking about? I haven't stopped talking since the party started."

"Well, you haven't said much to your mama."

Braelin smiled "I'm sorry. I'm just trying to make sure things are perfect. With all the craziness I think we all deserve it."

Mama Carol took the bowl of fruit out of her daughter's hand "I'm sure the fruit salad will remain a crowd favorite. I know somethings going on with you and I want—"

"Mama, I'm fine. But there is something going on with me and before you ask I will let you know everything soon, I promise." She kissed her mother on the cheek before scanning the area for Roman who was talking to Janelle.

Naomi and Briyanna noticed and decided now was the perfect time to make the big announcement. "Are you ready?" Briyanna asked standing beside her baby sister.

No, she wasn't ready. Braelin knew Dante was willing to go along with the plan if that was what she wanted to do. But Roman was completely against it and rightfully so. "I can't go along with this if Roman isn't ok with it and before you say anything I owe it to him as the father of my babies to get his approval. It wouldn't be right otherwise."

Briyanna nodded in understanding she knew what it would cost Roman to have another man claim responsibility and although it would be the best option for everyone it would further complicate things when the truth finally comes out. "I think you need to do what's best for you and the babies. Don't worry about Roman, Janelle and Dante. Worry about you and the babies."

"But I thought you said—"

Briyanna nodded "I know what I said and I was wrong. It was terrible big sister advice and I think you should completely ignore me."

Braelin laughed "This didn't help me at all."

"I know and I'm sorry."

Both girls laughed.

"I think I'm going to tell them the news and I'll deal with the rest later."

Briyanna grabbed Braelin's hand to give a reassuring squeeze "I like your idea better."

Braelin turned off the music which prompted everyone to look in her direction "First of all, I want to thank everyone for attending my first cook out. We all work so hard with working, traveling and whatnot and we don't really have time to spend moments like this together so I just wanted to thank you all for coming and I love you all dearly for it."

"Yeet! We love you too, Brae." Jey yelled.

"Yea, take that beer away from him, Tamika." Seth added, causing everyone to laugh.

"If he says yeet one more time I'm going to bury him in your backyard, Braelin." That was Dean.

Renee smacked Dean upside the head "Will you guys shut up. You're ruining Braelin's speech."

"The floor is yours queen, B."

Braelin smirked "Thank you, Becky and Renee. But, I did bring you all here for another reason. My decision to retire due to my knee injury was sudden but it wasn't the only reason for my retirement."

Jimmy looked over at Naomi who didn't seem at all surprised by this announcement "What's going on, Bug?"

Braelin looked over at Roman across the yard and at Dante who was standing next to her "I retired because four months ago I found out I was pregnant" She said revealing her baby bump "with twins. I'm having a boy and a girl."

Silence

More silence until Braelin was engulfed in two sets of arms that belonged to her parents.

Congratulations, cheers, and tears were shared between her friends and family. Everyone but one. Janelle was a smart woman and after remembering what Roman had told her knew that his first time cheating on her was a few months ago. Maybe even four months ago after a house show and considering the timing, it was more than possible that her husband was the father of Braelin's unborn babies and if that's the case:

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

AN: I'm sorry it took so long but the muse works when it wants to and due to this Pandemic I have more than enough to brainstorm and put together a chapter for you all. I hope you're all taking care of yourself during this time. Don't forget to wash your hands, don't touch your face and remain indoors. Stay safe and Happy Reading!

[grayroman]

⌠ OSCAR ISAAC, 41, CISMALE, HE/HIM ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, ROMAN GRAY! originally hailing from BLACKTHORNE, this alum specializes in RESEARCH & DEVELOPMENT. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of (dark curls above scratched up reading glasses, milk and sugar with a hint of coffee, a multitool in the pocket of a worn brown leather jacket).  it’s the pisces’ birthday on 03/09/1980, and when they were still in school their most requested dish was SPINACH AND RICOTTA RAVIOLI from the school’s chefs. hopefully their presence can help ease the minds of gallagher students.

                                                  𝗥𝗢𝗔𝗠𝗜𝗡’…

ACESS: GRANTED FILE NAME: GRAY, R.; 40; NO AGENCY

Roman Gray has had many ups and downs, sadly typical for someone in this line of work. Still, he likes to think he’s a pretty upbeat, healthy, friendly guy, though he may just be doing a good job hiding all the trauma in his life– again, sadly typical for someone in his line of work. He grew up without the knowledge of the spy world, and never attended a spy prep school. In his public high school in Queens, New York, circa late 90′s, he's the smartest kid in class, leagues above any of the other students. Coming from a low-income family, Roman figures the only way he’d be able to go to college was through a scholarship, so he works hard, thankful for his sharp intellect and aptitude towards technology. Naturally, the president of Robotics Club, he goes on to win several awards, and become nationally recognized– well, in the student robotics and technology community. But that, and his high IQ, puts him on the radar of Blackthorne Institute.

A letter arrives at the Gray household, asking for a chance for Roman to meet with recruiters from a boy’s university in Virginia. The family all jumps at the chance, and Roman meets with two of the buffest and suavest guys he’s ever seen in his life at a nearby coffee shop. They seem to eye the way Roman engages in polite conversation with his favorite barista, how he takes his coffee with 60% milk and sugar, and the way he kindly offers to pay for their drinks. Nonetheless, they disclose to him how his age and intellect would make him a great fit for their school, that even has a Research & Development major that would put his unique skills to use, as well as give him an additional new breadth of skills. However, if he enrolls, he would have to move to Virginia full-time and because of the nature of their private school, he could not withdraw until his degree was complete. But if he so chooses, Roman has a full four-year ride.

It’s a hard decision, to leave his family, but they all agree that this would be the best for all of them. He could go to a university that would not only allow him to pursue his passion, but not cost him or his family a cent, and put him on the road to being able to help provide for their future. So, despite the red flags and the slightly off-putting nature of the recruiters, he accepts.

When Roman first shows up to the Blackthorne Institute For Boys, he’s instantly in for a culture shock. The school is nothing like he’d imagined– bleak and dark, rigid and rough. And when he learns of it’s true purpose, of the world of spies, he feels betrayed. But the problem is there is no getting out now, he's stuck, feeling trapped and tricked by the institute and the people in charge. Still, they promise him that with his proficiency for his major, they could guarantee him a job upon graduation, and that if he tried to leave beforehand, everyone would be sorely unhappy. So Roman stays, in desperate hope to provide for his family, focusing on honing his craft, and channeling all his anger at the cruel nature of the school into all the physical training.

When his third year of school rolls around, he’s gotten good at throwing punches and shooting firearms, though he’s still definitely not the best in those departments– not to mention he hates it. But he’s at the top of his class when it comes to his major, making huge strides and taking advantage of the resources at his disposal, all while managing to keep his goodhearted disposition despite the harshness of the school. But this is also when he starts to hear rumors of the institute’s graduation process, and all this comes screeching to a halt, sick to his stomach. There’s no way out, he knows that, he doesn’t have to ask his instructors. So does that mean…? Roman barrels on ahead, refusing to think about it, refusing to accept that future.

By the time of his senior year, his father gets laid off from his low-rung corporate job, the only thing that had been keeping their family afloat. Loans are taken out, his family is put under more strain than ever before, and Roman resents both the capitalist assholes that had cut corners to line their pockets and the school that was keeping him hostage away from his family. Towards the end of his last year at Blackthorne, the CEO of the corporation is on trial, for revelations of embezzlement and even other heinous physical crimes committed against individuals in his employment. He’s at his peak of frustration, and with all the pressures of the school crushing him, he sets out on his graduation. After executing a hit on the CEO, Roman is silent the entire drive home, and upon reentering the school, runs straight for the bathroom to vomit.

Blackthorne pulls through on their promise, setting up a now emptier Roman with a job at an agency, working on developing and building new weapons. He hates it, really, but it pays extremely well, allowing him to support his family on his salary alone, and it gives him the space to later become one of the foremost experts in his industry. After years there, his murder farther in the past with each day, Roman starts to become more himself again, a humorous hotshot and quick as a whip. He even meets his best friend at that agency, a field agent who understands him better than anyone else.

Nearly a decade ago, while out on a mission, this best friend is caught in a struggle with his opponent, and as a result, the enemy gets a hold of his gun– a model Roman had made himself– and shoots him.

Roman quits immediately.

Since then, he’s become a freelance worker, taking jobs all over the globe, always moving. He’s been consulting on research studies and developing tech for hire, making a good earning for himself, and enough to keep sending his family back home money every month. On the outside, he’s his regular self– jovial, extroverted, cracking jokes and staying on top of his work, but he’s acquired a fear of staying in one place too long, making it impossible to commit to anyone or anything.

Fresh off a juncture in Berlin, he gets a call from one Laura Sutton, offering a mentoring job as a Blackthorne alum and expert in Research & Development at her school, the prestigious Gallagher Academy. While he’s not jazzed about being back in Virginia under Blackthorne’s name, and having to see the many faces of students he was once like, he takes it anyway. To Roman, this should be just another consulting job, and nothing more.

TL;DR - THE FACTS

the R&D alum who would have been here since January lol

was a Blackthorne graduate in order to support his family, since they promised him work after graduation

hates Blackthorne and all it’s memories, did not fare well there, and the hit he had to perform in order to graduate is his only direct kill, and one of the worst moments of his life

worked at agency for many years developing weapons

became a freelance agent after the death of his best friend, works on research and tech for anyone in the spy world who would pay

a bit of a nomad, doesn’t like to stay in one location too long; roaming loner with a heart of gold

generally friendly and easy-going; does his best to ignore all past trauma with humor and smiles

likes to pretend he’s tough, but he can’t take coffee black, has to have alcohol that’s sweet and fruity, and is obsessed with some musicals, so

not super happy about being here as a Blackthorne alum, but he does want to help the students

weary of all this Brotherhood nonsense, can’t help feeling guilty for all the kids, he doesn’t feel strange in wishing there wasn’t so much violence

protect the kids! he’s ready to adopt them but not really he can’t handle commitment, he refuses to like the kids too much

CONNECTIONS

Elise Park

Jack Stone

Irene Bradford

Naomi Powell-King

Hal Hardy

Allie Beckett

and that my friends is what you missed on glee!! hmu on disc to plot!! this has been another strud special!!

@gallagherintro

[purplesurveys]

932

What's your favourite sport? Do you prefer to watch it or play it?: I love pro wrestling, if you count that as a sport. I definitely prefer to just stay in front of a TV – I have never been in a ring, nor am I physically fit to even give it a shot without getting harshly injured. Conversely, I love table tennis but I’d rather play it than watch a game.

Who was the last person to send you a friend request on Facebook?: It was a stranger who, upon checking, seems to be some sort of spam account promoting a pyramid scheme. Happy to nope the fuck out of there.

Have you ever been to that person's house?: Definitely not. I don’t add people I didn’t know on any level, anyway.

How recently did you wash your hands?: This morning when I cleaned up after Cooper.

How many girls do you know named Emma?: Not a common name here, so I don’t know any Emmas.

[trigger warning under this I guess. Lots of angst going on at the moment.]

Are you upset, for any reason at all?: Yeah. I’ve been feeling very upset and under stress lately...to give you an idea, I find it a personal achievement to have gotten up and taken this survey. I’m at least self-aware that this is a temporary slump, but while it’s here hanging around, it really sucks to be in it.

How did you feel when you woke up today?: Shitty. The only reason I got up at all was to feed my dogs but otherwise I’ve been glued to either the couch or my bed.

When you're stressed, what helps you to relax or calm down?: Lately, it’s episodes of Good Mythical Morning. Rhett, Link, and their crew will never have any idea just how much they’ve helped this 22 year old, now-wondering-what-her-purpose-is-in-life fresh college graduate keep sane, but I’m glad they have hours upon hours of content and podcasts lying around to keep me company while no one else can.

What were you doing before you started this survey?: I finished another survey that I abandoned yesterday, and was watching GMM to fill up the silence in my room.

Is there something else you should be doing, that's more important?: I’ve been job-hunting 24/7 but lately I’ve been giving myself a break on weekends since no one will be processing applications or booking interviews on a Saturday anyway.

When was the last time you neglected to do something that you'd planned?: Around noon today.

Is there someone that can always make you smile no matter how bad you feel?: Apparently not. I’ve been a wreck all month so far and nothing has worked. Before September, I certainly thought animals or certain humans worked as cures for me.

Do you have any friends that you feel don't fully appreciate you?: I don’t feel that way about them. I think my friends care for me a whole lot, which I appreciate. I’ve had friends come to my DMs quite a few times in the last few days with messages of support since I’ve been a little vocal about how sad I’ve been feeling these days, so I for sure don’t feel invisible. Making me feel present is the best gift anyone could give me.

When was the last time someone told you that you were beautiful?: Last week when Gab came over.

Who was the last person that apologised to you?: Myself.

What were they apologising for?: Haven’t been looking out for myself recently.

Do you think they meant it?: I guess not, because I still haven’t stopped being destructive towards myself.

Would you be embarrassed if your parents looked at your Facebook?: I have them as my friends so they see everything. But I’m 22, so while they can complain about some of my posts (and it’s usually the political ones lol), they can’t tell me to take anything down anymore the same way they were able to do so when I was younger.

Describe the personality of the person you have feelings for.: She’s very warm, understanding, generous, and immeasurably protective of the people she loves.

What does your pencil case look like? What's in it?: I have a plush dog pencilcase that I use for my pens and pencils (given by my sister) and a pink pencilcase with a floral design that holds my highlighters (given by Jane).

In your Facebook friends list, who is the first person listed under 'D'?: Some girl named Abby whose surname begins with D. She was someone from my high school and we mutually know each other, but we’re not friends and we’ve never even talked.

How did you meet him/her?: I’ve never talked to her but I’ve known of her since grade school I guess? since she’s my sister’s batchmate.

Did the last person you kissed have facial hair?: No.

You're locked in a room with your ex. Any problems?: It would just be my girlfriend too so there wouldn’t be any problems, except that I’d probably break down crying upon seeing her again because I’ve barely pulled myself together over the last week and have had to go through it alone.

Be honest. What are you most afraid of?: These days I’m definitely doubting my capabilities and achievements and all the shit I’ve put on my resumé and portfolio, and now I’m scared if any company will even give me a chance. I’m honestly holding a little bit of resentment for every employed person right now because I have seen absolutely no one talk about how brutal this whole process/waiting game is, lol. This is so SHITTY, is it just difficult for me or what???? I’m so baffled.

In the last 24 hours, have you seen or spoken to anyone you dislike?: I’ve dealt with myself, but that’s it.

What colour are the eyes of the last person that told you they loved you?: Dark brown. 

What is a word or phrase that you say often?: I like saying “I guess” because it makes me sound unsure about most things and thus makes me not 100% accountable if things go wrong hah. I do have another answer that’s more in line with the angst and depression I’ve been going through recently, and it’s that I’ve repeating BoJack Horseman’s ‘piece of shit’ monologue to himself, but this time saying it to myself.

Name 3 songs that remind you of someone special.: Sparks by Coldplay; anything by Mitski; and anything by St. Vincent.

How much chocolate do you have in your house atm, if any?: We have...a lot. We still have the chocolate cake from Nina’s birthday and we recently received an entire pack of various fun-size chocolate bars like Twix, Three Musketeers, etc. from my aunt. We also have chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream that I normally would finish up in a day, but I’ve been saving it for every future job rejection I receive. 

Who is the most intelligent person you know?: Chesca.

Do you have younger siblings? If you do, are you protective of them?: Yes. I’m protective of my sister but I don’t show it lol. We are not showy in this family.

Who was the last person you insulted?: Idk probably a politician on social media.

What are the other members of your household doing at this moment?: I have not gone out of my room all day...I did not miss this sensation. It’s been a while since I’ve locked myself up for this long.

Do you have any neighbours that you don't get along with?: There’s a house behind ours that loudly plays 80s and 90s power ballads and love songs and it gets insanely irritating and makes the neighborhood feel cheap, but I keep my feelings to myself and I’ve never actually confronted them about it and asked them to stop or decrease their speaker’s volume.

How recently did you speak to the last person you kissed?: Like 30 minutes ago. I’m not very talkative these days and it was actually just the second time today that I initiated a bried conversation. I feel bad for her, and I can’t wait to get better so I can start treating her right again.

Who was the last person you told to get lost, or something similar?: I don’t usually tell this to people.

Give me a random line from the last song you listened to.: “We know better so we’d both better go.”

Have you ever had an argument with the last person you Facebook messaged?: Lots. She’s my girlfriend lol.

Do you have any plans for tonight?: I don’t know. If I feel any better, I’d practice and review for my upcoming interview this Tuesday, but if I’m not okay by then...I don’t know. I’ve stopped planning my days out recently and just go where my legs take me.

Where were you at 9 o'clock last night?: I was at the dining table trying to take a survey, but I quickly lost interest in it.

In the past week, have you slept past midday?: Kind of. Like I mentioned, Gabie’s on the night shift so I’ve been keeping her company, which means I occasionally take naps in the afternoon.

Is there anything happening tomorrow, that you're looking forward to?: No. I’m so scared of tomorrows now.

Is there anyone you used to be friends with, that you now dislike?: I dislike Athenna only because of her attitude and the way she treated Angela during the last few days of their friendship. I don’t have any personal beef with her, at least I don’t think I have. She likes stirring up shit though and I won’t be surprised if she was able to make up a story about me to get our other friends to dislike me.

What is your least favourite chocolate bar?: Eh, I’m pretty picky about chocolate bars so I have more brands that I dislike than the ones I do enjoy. I only like Reese’s, Butterfinger, Twix, and Whittaker’s. 

Do any of your friends or relatives have the same birthday as you?: Just this girl I went to grade school with named Mitch. Otherwise, April 21 babies are a rare breed apparently.

Name the last song that made you cry.: O by Coldplay.

Who do you miss at this moment?: The me from like two weeks ago lol. How far I’ve fallen.

Where is that person?: Stuck in August, I guess.

Have you ever dyed your hair an unnatural colour?: No.

Have you had any deep conversations today?: No.

Is your television on atm?: It’s not, but I have my phone playing GMM videos on YouTube to keep me company.

If it is, what are you watching?: It’s one of their product test videos.

Are you wearing anything blue?: My shirt is blue, actually.

Who were the last 5 people to make you smile?: Rhett and Link, and that’s pretty much it.

Do you use Twitter?: Sure.

Tell me about the last YouTube video you watched. They’re pitting brand name cleaning products and natural cleaning products against each other and seeing which one is more effective. I love these videos of theirs, hahaha.

Is there anything else you'd like to say?: No, I feel like I’ve grilled myself enough in this survey.

[sselkie]

C H A R A C T E R     S T U D Y     ⇁     ( 1 / ? )

I. 

   They never knew who to blame it on. The gender. The sex. Perhaps the doctor was the best choice. He had always insisted that it would be a boy; a strong, healthy baby boy that would make his parents proud. He would play football, listen to classical music, become a lawyer. God was sending them a saint. The perfect son. Except you were not a saint, or a son for that matter. Someone had to paint the crib pink and buy some dresses. In fact, all the pants would have to go. Even the binkies and the bibs were the wrong colors. And they certainly couldn’t name a little girl Penley. Only a monster would do that.

   The first words that graced your ears were from that of the doctor, a statement twisted into a question. “It’s . . a girl?” Then your parents had clamored, began panicking. “Wrap her up in a pink blanket! Get rid of the blue — you told us it’d be a boy!” A baby girl. What a nuisance. They’d raise you as their daughter, and what would you do? You’d just take someone else’s name in the end, continue on a different person’s legacy. Bullshit. Total bullshit. But what could they do?

   Yet, they took you home. Long, sleepless nights exchanged between your parents. It should come as a surprise that they refused to hire a nanny with their deep pockets. Part of you might always wonder how they could want you and care for you as a child: screaming, helpless, annoying.

II. 

   For years, they kept telling you a baby brother was on the way. Their expected prince. But for years they couldn’t seem to make it happen. The longer they failed, the farther pregnancy seemed away. Your hopeful little smile dipped farther from returning each time the announcement was retracted. Nonetheless, your father would go out and buy a bouquet each time he’d think they’d done it. You’d sit by them for a few hours each day, memorizing the different colors and the droop of the petals, until eventually you couldn’t help but touch them. The velvety petals would roll between your clumsy fingers and if you didn’t accidentally take one off, then the next morning you’d return and they’d have retracted. 

   It tended to be those same days your parents would get into a heated discussion — the doctor informing them that no, they were not pregnant though you’d tried your best to beg him for a different answer. You would proceed to coax the flower back out, talking till your throat was raw, and your mom peppered you with kisses to inform you that bedtime had arrived. The connection was simple to reach for, but you’d always eventually give in and feel the petals between your fingers. You’d certainly love a baby brother with golden hair like yours, but he was not here and you could not solve that. You loved the flowers, and it was too trying not to strain for their embrace.

   Other days, Mama would set up a picnic out back, the woods edging against your backyard and the wildflowers calling you from a distance. Those were the times that Dad would be at work all day. You’d fill your mother’s antique tea-set with your special punch — melted popsicles, and sip away under the Indiana sunshine. She’d let you run free, go screaming victoriously into the forest. Those were different times. Sometimes you’d come back without a shirt, your skirt riding high in all your childhood glory and she’d lift you up into her arms and chastise you with a smile. Then, you’d both disappear in the forest looking for the lost articles of clothing as she talked about how children of God were supposed to wear clothes and that you were not a witch, not like the people far down the street.

III.

   The news came too soon. Father fumed for days, raving on and on about how that this wasn’t his fault. Given, you didn’t learn till years later that it truly wasn’t. There was no chance for that baby brother you and your mother dreamed about aloud on sunny, summer days. Hope lay stagnant between your parents, but hidden in your underbelly waiting for a new dream to arise. Dormant, realizing that they had hit a wall, Mama and Dad never recovered. Weekends spent watching reruns of Tom and Jerry interchangeably with them were warped into something else. A nightmare you never understood of vodka, rum, wine, beer, anything really. 

   Being perfectly honest, the difficult part was never tucking yourself in at night. It was that you still loved them when they would not give in to your childish pleas of coming home, going inside, and just falling asleep. So that your worrying may not warp your dreams into nightmares. From there, alcohol was the easiest thing to erase from your future.

   But with fifth grade arrived a project. It hadn’t seemed significant at first, just wasteful. You didn’t want to spend the time prepping a tri-fold when you could be running rampant in the woods outside or riding your bike to the park or painting. At some point your parents had even cracked and bought you an easel once they’d tired of constant finger-painting. Of course, you’d rather be tracing dandelions than doing homework. With topics being plucked up within days of the two week assignment, you scrambled for whatever was thrown your way. That was when you knew what you wanted. The job fair had gone smoothly; the idea of being a real life police officer racing through your mind. That concept, the possibility of helping people snagged under your skin.

IV.

   Teenage years passed as a blur in your peripheral vision. They were years of confusion, certainly. You definitely weren’t interested in sex, though you assumed you’d just wait till you found the right person. Additionally, you never bothered dating; you’d rather ignore how you’d always need to strike up a conversation with Jen from physics. 

   Eventually, your parents gave up on trying to sell you the life of a florist as opposed to that of a police officer. In fact, they struggled for anything else they could get you to do. A nurse. A mother. A teacher. A waitress. A secretary.  “Please, anything, but a man’s job.” Your mom was known to beg and for a while you had made them happy as a waitress, saving money and waiting till you could move out. 

   It was no big shock to most in the church community when you were offered a job. You still do not understand your parent’s complete disdain. Many people aren’t thick-skulled. They had accepted the possibility of a woman working a man’s job. Still, the offer was huge to a girl like you. It has been what you’d wanted since forever. You’d have to attend the police academy, not too far from Wheeler, but not within the town limits. In return, you were promised a job at the Wheeler Police Department and half of your tuition paid for.

   You accepted without hesitation and with a noticeable lack of any conversation exchanged with your parents on the topic. Inevitably, the good news couldn’t be stifled for long. Believe it or not, you knew right when they knew; father insisted you were to leave. Your mom, as always, only offered a saddening smile behind his back. You took what was important: your flower pots, bed, bike, clothes, painting supplies, and toothbrush. And in a fit of frustration and rage, you dumped their wine stand onto the floor. The glass and alcohol pooled into a mosaic; one that you can still remember, a message from God no doubt hidden somewhere in it. But you were gone, sprinting out the door and swinging into your friend’s pick-up before it could speak to you. As far as you know it still sits there, waiting to be translated.

V.

   Two and a half years passed quicker than you expected and graduation occurred late April. It was the ceremony that churned by in two and a half years rather than two and a half hours. You achieved near two disembodied claps after your name rang across the stage. There was no “that’s my girl” or cowbell echoing distantly. 

   Within the week after, you had your hand on the bible and an apartment. The week after that, your first day on the job. An early birthday present, better than lamenting in the Chinese restaurant for the third year in a row. 

   Soon though, it seemed that with your hiring came an avalanche of horror. Cassie Klein’s disappearance. You’d broken down in the brush behind the Klein’s house less than an hour after arriving on the scene, praying to God that he need not do this. This karma was reserved for you, not a child. And yet, it appeared he hadn’t listened, not since you had cried till utterly raw with blood dripping from your nose.

   These mental breaks were never supposed to become ritual. But ever since her disappearance (one year exactly), you cannot catch a break. You want to do good so badly that maybe you don’t know when to quit, but you’d like to learn how to do better.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #267

“you can take my heart, you can take my breath - when you pry it from my cold, dead chest.”

When did you last talk to the last person you kissed? Last night. Do you think people have any misconceptions about you? Oh, I'm positively certain. What’s something you wish you could understand better? There are a great many things, but the first that came to mind are certain political/moral beliefs that I REALLY do want to understand, but I just don't. When was the last time you cried really, really hard? About a week back when I woke up shrieking and sobbing from a nightmare about Dad. Have you ever injected a drug? No. How many people have you liked in the past 5 months? I've been COnfuFSSeD!!!!!! Are you currently in a relationship? Nope. Probably for the better. Have you ever touched a dead body? Animals, yes. I may have at an open-casket wake, but idr. I was young. Ever played Grand Theft Auto? Nope, but oh man, good memories of those stupid games with my neighbor back when I was younger... He loved that game just to fuck around, and I liked watching. Then Jacob and Jason played it together at the apartment a lot, and those are warm memories, too. The last male you spoke to … is he attractive? That would be my 3-year-old nephew, so it'd be fucking weird to call him that. He's one handsome little boy, though. We all know he's gonna be a lady killer one day. If your ex called right now, would you answer? Yeah. Is there a dictionary on your bookshelf? I don't even have a bookshelf. Do you have any pet names for the person you love/like? Not anymore. Who was the last person you had a serious conversation with? What is your honest opinion of that person? Mom. I love her to death. Who was the first person you dated? What is your honest opinion of that person? Aaron was my puppy-dog love, and I have not the slightest clue what he's up to now, but I have faith he's kept that good head of his. Ever fallen in the shower? I've passed out while getting *out* of it. I've slipped a number of times too, but not truly fallen. Do you think that things will get better? For me, I genuinely don't know. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yes, by my cousins' friend's pool for a b-day party. It was cool. Their house was fuckin' wild. Movie theater inside and all. Is your dad bald? Just about. His head is just mostly shaved. Have you ever slept at a member of the opposite sex’s house? I mean yeah, all the time when we were together. Have you ever hooked up with someone to hurt someone else? Wow, no. I don't do "hook-ups" anyway. Do any of your relatives actually pinch your cheeks when they see you? No. Have you ever made a member of the opposite sex cry? Ugh, yeah. Do you know the last person you kissed's parents? Yes, I adore them. Do they like you? I think so. Name a couple things you can cook. ... Literally just scrambled eggs, if you mean something pretty much from scratch. Well, I could probably still do pasta if I read the box. Who was there to help you last time you were puking? My mom. I am absolutely terrified of vomiting, so she's kind enough to somehow manage to stand in there with me and talk to me. Are there any boxes of tissues in your room? What’s the design on it? No. Are you in high school? When are you done? No. I graduated in 2014. Are you embarrassed to say if you’re a virgin or not? More like confused and awkward, because I genuinely DON'T know for sure. Have you ever met someone you thought you’d be with forever? It was  "certainty" to me. That's partially why the breakup was so traumatizing. I MEAN IT when I say my brain couldn't even fathom the idea. It was "impossible." It simply couldn't happen. Then it did. ^Where are you two now? We haven't spoken in three years. Has your best friend ever been in love? Yes. What was the last magazine you bought? I've never been a magazine person. Will the last person you kissed get you anything for your next birthday? *shrugs* Do you think Family Guy is funny or just stupid? It can be both. Have you ever stayed with someone who treated you like shit just because you liked them so much? NO SIR-EE. You'd never see me stay with someone who treated me badly. Would you date someone all your friends and family hate? If I REALLY liked them, but if everyone hated that person, I would seriously consider why that is. Are you already looking forward to your wedding? Ha ha, not really, in most ways. Like, I hate getting all fancy and such. Have you ever spit on someone? No. Would you rather cuddle or make out? I MEAN, that depends on the mood??? Has your best friend ever been cheated on? No. Do you text with one hand or with both? Both. Are your parents left or right-handed? Right, to my knowledge? What was the last photo you took of? Something on FB I wanted to show to Sara. What topic always interests you and you will never tire of? C R Y P T I D Z Are you more or less tolerant than the average person? If you mean of varying beliefs, stuff like that, definitely more. If someone were to rate your life, what film certificate would it receive? PG-13 or R, idk. Actually, probably R for all they profanity lmaooo. Do you mind eating cold fries or are they disgusting? Ewww. What song makes you cry? What about it makes you cry? I physically cannot listen to "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin because of Jason joking at prom that the music sucked and we could dance to something like that, then once he took me home, I played it from my iPod over his car speakers and we danced in the headlights of his truck and it all felt like a fairy-tale. I'm emotional just typing it and it makes my stomach hurt, so moving on. If you could remake a movie, which movie would it be? Silent Hill: Revelation. As a fanatic over the series, I enjoyed it decently, but, objectively, it sucked and was ALL over the place. How about if you could rewrite a book's ending, which one? Why? I don't think I'd change any. Maybe a clearer answer to The Handmaid's Tale, but it's still g. What colour hair does your sibling(s) have? Brown, except Misty and Katie. Theirs is black. What gemstone would you like on your wedding ring? A dragon's breath opal or rose gold would be gorgeous. What are you looking forward to in the near future? We're throwing my little sister a surprise graduation party at our older sis's house. Thanks to the quarantine, her senior graduation isn't *actually* happening, so. How is life going for you, anyway? Be honest. IT KINDA S U CKS!!!!!! What time did you get changed this morning? I haven't changed out of my pj's. I almost never do (besides obviously after a shower) because I have nowhere to go, like ever. Have you met somebody that you want to spend the rest of your life with? Yeah. Have you ever dressed up as a Disney character? Which one? Maybe as a kid? Have you ever played chess? If so, are you good at it? I’ve never played it. If I wanted to buy you a chocolate bar, what kind should I NOT get? Ew, Snickers. Of all your close friends, who have you known the longest? Sara. What was the last song you heard, that made you feel emotional? Hm. Maybe "Disguise" by Motionless In White. I wonder all the time if that's how Jason felt. Plus it's his favorite band, so that's a double whammy. When was the last time you took a selfie? Maybe about a month ago. As a child, did you ever have any scented gel pens or markers? Oh, I remember those! Yes. Name an alcoholic beverage that you dislike. Hell, most that I've tried. I hate strong stuff. Can you recall the last time you were on a dancefloor? When I was shooting someone's wedding last year. Do you own any color-changing mood jewellery? No, I have zero faith in those. What was the last thing you heated up in your microwave? Ummm pizza rolls, I think. What was the last flavor of ice cream you had? Moose tracks. Do you have an online game that you play often? I play World of Warcraft daily, and I enjoy the Dragons of Atlantis app a few times a day. I was into it when it was still a game on an actual website, and I more recently downloaded it on my phone. What’s your favorite cookie? Soft chocolate chip... yum. How long would you have to date someone for before moving in together? I think this depends very much on the relationship, BUT LIKE, definitely not TOO quickly because you need to test the endurance of the relationship. I'd at the very least give it a year and seriously consider how healthy the relationship is. Moving in with each other shouldn't be an impulsive "this is working great omg I love him/her let's do this!!!!". What's your favorite kind of sushi? N/A How much was the last bill that you paid? I've never paid a bill... wow, that's sad. What was the cause of the worst low point you've had in your life? A very abrupt, traumatic breakup. What are some of your favorite types of cheeses? Really just American. When did you last feel like your privacy was invaded? I'm not sure. Do your parents volunteer anywhere? No. Do you own more than 50 books? I have my Warriors books stocked somewhere. Probably in the attic. Do you have a bachelor's degree? Bitch I wish. How old were you when you became financially independent from your parents? I'm 24 and still aren't independent. Does your kitchen have an island? No. Have you ever bought or sold something on Facebook Marketplace? No. Do you know anyone famous enough to have their own Wikipedia page? No. What was the last appointment you had? With my psychiatrist over the phone because yeah quarantine. Why did you last feel like crying? I woke up from yet another nightmare. I'm so, so tired of them. They make me dread sleep. Do you keep your friends secrets/private information to yourself? If it truly is private, yes, and secrets, absolutely. What negative quality do your friends bring up the most? "I... don’t think I’d like to be friends with people who have a habit of bringing up 'negative' things about me." <<<< This. Do you often "jump" to conclusions? ONLY ALWAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What about the world do you wish you never found out? Christ, there's a lot. For some reason, the first thing that came to mind is the dogmeat trade in Korea. A girl in my first semester did a presentation on it, and just... wow. I never had the slightest clue it was a thing. Does the sight of blood make you feel sick? No. Does someone's background affect whether you'll be friends with them or not? Well, yeah. I'm not gonna be friends with a rapist or something. How about their religious background? Depends on if they push that shit on me or not, as well as things they believe. If someone admitted cheating in a past relationship of theirs, would you trust them? NNNNNNNNNOPE. Do you drink tea and/or coffee every day? There are so many tea/coffee questions in surveys... and no. I don't like either. Did you ever want to be a cook as a kid? No. Do you wish that magic was real? Well, it depends on what the magic is. Do you prefer fire or ice? Fire is cooler. Do you rap along with rap songs? No. When happy, do you become more talkative? WAY MORE. Bowling or sailing? Why? Never sailed before, but bowling is fun. Especially with the lights off but all the neon and signs lit up. Do you prefer sitting in the front or back of a car? THE FRONT!!!!!!!!! Sitting shotgun and being able to control the music is everyTHIIIIIIIIIIIING. How about in a train? On the bus? I don't really have a preference here. Do you care about politics? I should... Are you offended easily by non-politically correct language? No, honestly. Do you think the censors/fcc go a bit too far or are just right? Definitel too far. Have you ever taken a martial art? Which one(s)? No. Do you know anyone who is scared of you? No. I am so unintimidating. Do you like watermelon? Not really, no. Can you remember the month of your first kiss? April or May, p sure. What do you think is the most interesting thing about you? Uh. I dunno, man. Do you have a photo album? Mom has tons. What was your biggest fear as a child? Thunderstorms. I was fucking terrified. Can you remember all your past teachers' names? The majority. Do you find people taller than you intimidating? Generally tall men do, but not always. What's your favorite thing about your country? We have a lot of freedom. What's your least favourite thing about your country? We're greedy as fuck. What websites do you have bookmarked? I have a few on my personal laptop, which I don't have access to now so can't recall well. What TV show scared you as a kid? Courage the Cowardly Dog... though I watched it anyway lmao. What is one thing you regret having done or not done in your life? There's a lot. Let's not focus on it. Which parent do you identify with the most? I guess Mom. What embarrasses you the most in front of other people? laskdjflawe admitting I RP is almost ENTIRELY IMPOSSIBLE to others, especially in-person. If you had to choose one thing you were most passionate about, what would it be and why? Politics, 'cuz that's shit that seriously matters and affects the world. Who are you most envious of—real or fictional—and why? Probably an old friend who's an award-winning, quite successful photographer here in the state. She's shot fashion and model stuff professionally. She's absolutely gorgeous, does the coolest stuff... What’s the saddest song you’ve ever heard? Good Lord, I know so many. "UR A WOMAN NOW" by Otep is one, then there's "Terrible Things" by Mayday Parade, "Cancer" by My Chemical Romance... wow, I'm so surprised they're not just rushing to me. How about the sweetest song? Biiiiiih "Here For You" by Ozzy Osbourne laskdjfk;awe Do you know how to play dominoes? No. What food will you absolutely not, under any circumstances, eat? Exotic/endangered animal meat. What is one thing you’re embarrassed to admit you want to try? Uhhh I'm really not sure. Which famous person would you like to be BFFs with? Shane Dawson is MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Is there something you wish you had said sorry for but never did? Many things.

[stvrshinc]

  °✧｡× :  (  zendaya coleman + non-binary +  they/them )  ───  welcome to roselake village, lydia beckett !  oh, well, i suppose you’ve been here for three months, so perhaps you already know your way around the town. well, you are the twenty-two year old scientist, though, right ? the harvest sprites told me about you ! they said you do not believe in the harvest goddess. oh, my. well, that explains why they also said you’re quite principled and decisive, but can also be a bit stubborn and close-minded. either way, you should be a wonderful addition to our island ! i guess i’ll leave you to it now, but if i need you, i suppose i’ll just look for you at de la lune, yeah ? we hope you love it here as much as we do ! oh, and remember not to go into the tulsy woods ! cheeks stained with ink from falling asleep on notes , wild hair curling over a starched white collar , chalkboards covered corner-to-corner in indecipherable calculations ! ✧ 

A BITCH FINALLY FINISHED okay here we go what’s up, babes !! it’s ya boi, mozzie. i’m 8teen ( a babie , i know ) and i am in hast ! literally no one else is gonna be in that timezone, and i’ve accepted this fact. i go by they/them and uhhhhh got nothing else to say about myself. anyways, i’ll be out here trying my best so pls feel free to hit me for a good time !! or at least, moderately entertaining time.

 S T A T S

full name: lydia beckett

nickname(s): becks

age: twenty-two

date of birth: february 10

gender: non-binary

pronouns: they/them

hometown: flagstaff, arizona

parent(s)/sibling(s): elijah becket ( father ), charlotte beckett ( mother ), amelie grace nee beckett ( sister -five years older ), virginia beckett ( sister - three years older ), isaac beckett ( brother - two years younger )

orientation: science

occupation: grad student - they out here working on their thesis baby !!

P H Y S I C A L

face claim: zendaya coleman

hair colour: dark brown with golden highlights from being in the sun too long

eye colour: hazel

height: 5′8′’

tattoos: n/a - may get some in the future

piercings: standard lobe piercings on both ears. belly button piercing that she got with her sister when they graduated that they haven’t told anyone about. 

distinguishing characteristics: wildly curly hair that they refuse to wear any other way besides natural. known to throw it up haphazardly with pencils/pen sticking out randomly in different directions.

A B O U T

can i just say that they boring as shit until they get to rose lake??

lydia grew up the middle child in a huge family, with siblings and cousins constantly underfoot. their parents loved them all, but obviously were more than busy trying to take care of the horde. with a burgeoning lawyer and star athlete for older siblings and a leading thespian as a younger sibling, lydia found themselves falling into the role of quiet, studious middle child.

they convinced themselves into thinking that there wasn’t anything special about them and that they wouldn’t amount to much. they resigned themselves to a life of constantly being surpassed, up until they decided in high school that they would use their smarts to try and change the world.

they got into *insert fancy school here that would be most convenient plot-wise* on a partial-ride scholarship and decided to pursue environmental science ! college is where they thrived, mostly because they were surrounded by other people who had the same goals as them and were willing to work hard for it. 

environmental science isn’t particularly competitive as a field, but being female-presenting in male-dominated world forced them to speak out more and thus, their middle-child syndrome began to become more prominent. they felt the unending need to prove themselves to others, and they began to steal attention for themselves.

they decided to continue environmental sciences in graduate school, mostly because they weren’t done being a student, but also because graduate school opened up more research opportunities. this is what lead them to roselake in the first place.

they had signed up for a highly-coveted research position in the arctic circle (let’s say,,,,,,,somewhere in scandinavia) but due to some clerical error, they missed out on the spot and was forced to take the only remaining spots left, which sent them to roselake with a miniscule group of two lead scientist and one other grad student. suffice to say, they aren’t exactly happy about it.

P E R S O N A L I T Y

they are a bitch ! absolute grump this one !!

middle child syndrome like nobody’s business. they need to be the best and  is not afraid to step on anyone else on their way to being the best. it a good thing they are in science because if they were in a more competitive field, they’d probably have thrown hands by this point.

 they value their intelligence very much and they like to put the world into neat boxes. sciences makes sense to them. they understand biology and physics but not people so much and never magic, so they absolutely do not believe in the harvest sprites. 

they’re kind of vehemently against the idea of the sprites, so they will be dismissive and often cold with anyone who does believe in the sprites. they do feel like its a loaf of horseshit.

they are going to boost themselves using this tiny town and they will end up with an international prize if it kills them, so they are going to make certain that they find the source of the town’s ecological decline and they are certain there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for it all. their thesis is gonna smack.

honestly kind of feral. tends to get that crazed scientist look about them if they go too long on a research binge with no rest. 

not too interested in making friends in roselake, but i bet there are definitely people interested in making friends with them. 

pls get them to chill the fuck out and get the giant stick from out of their ass.

W A N T E D  C O N N E C T I O N S

pretty pls can someone bring me either the other grad student or any of their leads o-o they can be anything they want i would just love to see someone fully appreciating lydia’s scientific brilliance but absolutely unable to handle everything else about them.

throw all the harvest sprites at them. do your best pls.

friends??? spare friends for them please??? they aren’t going to know how to handle people liking them for their personality lmao so pls baffle them

enemies!! this could be someone else on the team scientist who have differing opinions, either on the harvest sprites or on literally anything else!! this could also just be towns folk who don’t like them cause they’re a dick!! anything !! fight them !!

[oliviaculpo]

YOU

NAME/ALIAS: Kelly!

TIMEZONE: MST! For good this time too :D since we just closed on our house here!! YAY! No more moving finaaaalllyyyyy

RANDOM FACT: I have two kitties and a cute great Pyrenees puppy! 

CHARACTER ONE

NAME: Lucky Caruso 

FACECLAIM: DJ Cotrona

BACKGROUND: 

TRIGGER WARNINGS: death, armed robbery, white-collar crimes 

Born & raised in Miami to a single mother who had no business being a mom.

High school drop out?? Nah, middle school drop out. Well, he didn’t officially drop out until high school, but he stopped going when he was HELLA young.

Really only street and survival smart. He knows basics buuuut yeah.

Nicknamed Lucky by his mom even tho he’s not lucky at all.

Has a deviated septum that he’ll never get fixed hahaha.

His mom died when he was 17 and she finally told him who his father was. So he went to find the dude and laughed when he saw them.

Figured fuck it since he was gonna be 18 soon so it didn’t matter. BUT his dad wanted to get to know him so like over time they got to know one another.

Now has two half-brothers Nathan and Lawson Marlowe and a half-sister Olivia Marlowe.

The Marlowe family had dipped into cheap versions of white-collar crimes.

So they focused a lot of like small investment fraud, identity theft, stealing social security checks, stuff like that. But they were nothing compared to like big dogs who had all this money from it. In fact, they were still pretty poor wannabe criminals lmao. Then again, their knock-off ponzi schemes weren’t that great.  

Eventually, he met Elena. And despite the fact that they fight like cats and dogs the two of them married….which was the worst decision ever. Like why did they do this to themselves???? Literally, do they actually even love each other??? Idk what even happened there okay. Lucky is just....yeah.

Went to jail from 27 to 28 for a stupid warrant he didn’t realize was out there. AND THENNNNN as soon as he was out, he got in trouble again…….

When Lucky was 30 he was on a job to rob a bank which was planned for a really really long time. He was nothing more than a simple associate with a cut of the money.

It blew up in their faces but only Lucky and one other were caught and taken in.

He was put on trial which lasted two years to finally finalize. During that time he was released on bail.

Eventually, he was sentenced to ten years which was a lesser sentence because he sold out the people he was working with because tbh he ain’t concerned about them I guess.

Served five years (one year was spent from being in and out during his trial period) until he was released for overcrowding and is now on parole and work release and has to do like classes for the state. 

Only just got out a few weeks ago and was sent to a halfway house but now he’s finally back and things are hella different. Very much wants a divorce and figure shiz out for himself?? like wtf he gonna do now??? 

HEADCANONS: 

Has a deviated septum (I know it’s listed above but he literally can’t sleep because of it) so he has sleep apnea. 

Doesn’t drink or do drugs. Really doesn’t do anything associated with drugs honestly. But people tend to assume that about him given his lifestyle. But he does smoke cigs which is bad too but whatevs!! 

Headcanon for the future but I’d love for him to enroll in some online classes and actually get his GED??? Since he dropped out so young. 

LOVES a good laugh. If you can make him laugh you’re cool with him. He’s actually a really mellow guy. He’s not standoff-ish and doesn’t try to be intimidating you know? He’s like a gentle giant if anything. Sure, he has his moments but for the most part, he just like walks away from people who piss him off. Especially now since he’s on parole and can’t exactly do shit to mess with that. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS: 

I don’t have much for him aside from like family stuff and like his estranged wife and an ex. Other than that I’m completely open and I’d LOVE stuff for him. Enemies, friends, someone who helps him out, someone he helps out. Someone to make him laugh hahaha. 

CHARACTER TWO 

NAME: Isla von Dehn 

FACECLAIM: Olivia Culpo

BACKGROUND: 

Miami girl born and raised. Granddaughter of Hyatt Robert von Dehn. Aka co-founder of Hyatt Hotels. Which means she comes from a lot of wealth and all that jazz, even after they sold the brand to a diff fam and started their investment business.

Because of that, she became really in love with the idea of just spending money all the time. Like Naomi Clarke from 90210??? Who just loved buying shit. 

Definitely more than a pretty face but she didn’t really care to prove that she was until later on in life??? 

Not the type of person to judge, hate and all that. Like yeah, she has her moments, but the materialistic things don’t really make her a selfish brat. She just loves life’s luxuries ya feel?????? definitely feel?????

Nicknamed LADY LEGS / LEGS because she’s got a pair that goes on for days.

Accepted into prestigious college (haven’t picked which yet lmaoooo) because of her family and the fact that her father wrote a pretty hefty check. He wanted her and her older sibling to follow in their footsteps and whatnot.

But she didn’t want to follow in their footsteps really. Maybe she thought she did, but she didn’t. So instead she just hung out with her girlfriends and.... you guessed it, spend money. 

Eventually had a huge fight with her family and her dad threatened to take away her trust fund if she didn’t do something with her life and stop racking up so many high credit card bills. 

Felt underestimated so she stepped it up and graduated from college, got her bachelors, worked her butt off, took the LSATs and later the BAR buuuut failed which was really sad. So she was like clearly i’m not meant to go down that path, so she picked something else.

Eventually started working as a stylist at a high-end boutique and later became a personal stylist which was much more suited for her.  

Recently she married her boyfriend at her friend’s bachelorette party in new orleans. and everyone is like wtf???? why would you marry him y’all only been dating for a few months now???? but whatevs i guess do u girl??? 

She’s is honestly just the type of person who wants to enjoy life and what she has. 

She’s pretty much a recycled and fixed up version of an old charrie of mine named Phoebe????? so yeah she holds some things that are very near and dear to my heart <3

HEADCANONS: 

Lmao loves glitter. Has so many sparkly tops because she’s lame like that. 

Incredibly, incredibly close to her family. Yes, her dad can be harsh sometimes but he means well. He just wants her to succeed and she gets that.

Doesn’t really do drugs like at all?? But her friend circle def does. She’s more in love with shopping LMAO. Confessions of a shopaholic okay. 

Has two cats who she loves soooo much. 

Will always let you raid her closet. 

Has over twenty small tattoos (inspo from Chiara Ferragni) all around her body. Her mom hates them but she finds the body to be like a canvas. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS: 

Again, like Lucky, I don’t have much for her yet. But I’d love like friendships, enemies, chance encounters, sibling-like friendships, friends to enemies, enemies to friends. Anything!! I’m also very open to like just going with the flow you know? 

[chaotic-yeet]

every single fucking one yobi

Hey Strawberry, you asked for this

Do you ever doubt anyone else's existence other than your own: Not really no

On a scale of 1-5 how afraid of the dark are you: 5+ I have nyctophobia so it's extremely bad for me

The person you would never want to meet: Does knowing them and no longer speaking count? An old friend of mine, I hope I never see her again

What is your favorite word: I'm actually not sure, I have a few ones I like to say because I pronounce them wrong, but I don't think I have a favorite

If you were a type of tree, what kind would you be: Maybe a birch tree? They're my favorite kind in minecraft sooo

When you looked in the mirror this morning, what did you first think: "Damn I need to wash my face more"

What shirt are you wearing:. A Mammoth one! It's dark gray, has a bear on the back and front chest area, and has blue, pink, and purple fade on it (the bi flag!)

What do you label yourself as: a fuckin bastard or dumbass thats what

Bright room or dark room: I have sensitive eyes so a dark room, but with either soft light or nightlight, I hate complete darkness

What were you doing at midnight last night: Talking to @the-strawzish-clownfish , while being on call with @psychotic-roach he had fallen asleep

Favorite age you've been so far: 13 probably, which sounds weird, but my mental health got better that year (it didn't stay that way but eh)

Who told you they loved you last: @psychotic-roach !! And I love you too (once you read this :D)

Your worst enemy: Myself and an old friend I mentioned in like, question 3

What's your current desktop picture: On my main laptop it's a Marble Hornets fanart (that I adore) and on my Chromebook it's some space doodles in the bi colors

Do you like someone: Fuck yes I do, @psychotic-roach you're fucking great and deserve the world

The last song you listened to: Deku Palace remix! I'm a huge EDM/ Trap fan, combine it with Zelda music and I'm hooked!

You can press a button to make one specific person explode, who would you pick: Old friend from before

Who would you really just love to punch in the face: Many, many people

If anyone could be your slave for the day, who would it be and what would they do: Well probably a close friend of mine, and I'd have him play smash with me and make pancakes with me (basically beg him to hang out even though it's quarantine so we can have fun again)

What's your best physical attribute: Probably my hair, it's dyed purple and used to be shaved

If you were the opposite sex for a day, what would you look like and what would you do: I'd probably look the same just taller and less curves, and I'd probably jerk off or go on some 3am walk because fuck it I can

Do you have a secret talent: I don't think so, I have a shitty memory, but not when it comes to naming ninjago episodes, @the-strawzish-clownfish can verify

What is one unique thing you're afraid of: Touching Rays, any kind, especially the ones at aquariums that come up to the tank wall that you can pet

You can only have one kind of sandwich, every ingredient is at your disposal: Well call me white, but my usual, white bread turkey and shredded cheese. That's it. I'm super lame.

You just found $100 how are you gonna spend it: Save it, I always save hundreds without hesitation

You just got a free plane ticket to go anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately: Uh, probably Georgia to see some family

Basically an Angel says I'll give you lost of booze forever be specific: Uh, fuck I dunno I don't drink, Fuckin' Crown Royal for shits and giggles why not

An island in which you can make your own rules, what's the first: Stay on your own turf unless someone allows you to come in, unless it's emergency (and I know this rule will cause problems, it's a guideline at best)

What is your favorite expletive: Tie between Bullshit and Fuck, I absolutely love those two

Your house is on fire (but everyone is okay) what one object do you grab: Well, in my current room right now? My phone, I'll still have contact with people I love and have my art (the only thing I care about in here) with me too

You can erase any horrible experience from your past: Main one, I won't actually say allowed but Roach you know what it is, but one I can put on here, Probably some embarrassing thing I did, most like everyone else

You got kicked out of your country, where would you live: GERMANY! I love the German language and I'd absolutely love to go to Germany and live with it!

Death is a good dude and says you can choose who to bring back: My cat who died a few years ago, he was an awesome cat that didn't deserved to die at 6 years old

What was your last dream about: I have super long dreams, like so much goes on in them it's like a story, too long to type out, @psychotic-roach knows it. Long story short, Pirates and apartments under water

Are you a good (insert whatever): Am I a good, fuck I dunno let's do artists because it's easy. I think I do decent enough

Have you ever been admitted to the hospital: No, only when I was a newborn in the nicu because I wasn't latching right

Have you ever built a snowman: Nope, but my friend did and I watched. His snowman was tiny and got stepped on, my friend shed a few tears

What is the color or your socks: Not wearing any right now, but usually gray

What type of music do you like: EDM AND TRAP BABYYY IF IT'S LOUD I LOVE IT

Do you prefer sunrise or sunset: Sunset definitely, I burn easy so having the nice night air slowly come over with the stars is nice for me

Favorite milkshake flavor: Chocolate!

What football team do you support: American football? None. German Bundesliga teams? Stuttgart. We were assigned teams in my German class and that was mine! Stuttgart all the way!!

Do you have any scars: Yes, many. They range from self harm, to actual cat scratches, to me falling, and many more

What do you want to be when you graduate: No idea!

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Weight, I have bad self esteem so it's never enough

Are you reliable: Honestly, no. I have bad memory and I will forget if someone needs something

If you could ask your future self a question what would it be: How's Roach doing, and what's Oregon like?

Do you hold grudges: depends, mostly no, but sometimes yes

If you could breed two animals together and defy the laws of nature, what two would you breed: Uh good question, probably Cat and Opossum, really just to see what would happen

Most unusual conversation: Mental health stuff with my parents and therapist, more awkward than anything

Are you a good liar: Not really no depending on the person

How long could you go without talking: Well in quarantine all day, regular days though, maybe an hour at best, I absolutely love my friends, just only certain ones

What has been your worst haircut/ style: Back when it was longer than my shoulders and I wore it down. Except I never took care of it so it looked like shit.

Have you ever baked your own cake: Yes every birthday I make mine! I even had my friends help me with my most recent one!

Can you do any accent other than your own: maybe a southern one but no not really

What do you like on your toast: Nutella or cinnamon and sugar. I know, terrible for you

What is the last thing you drew a picture of: Uh me and @psychotic-roach and our pets but I'm self conscious about my art so I just didn't really show it to anyone (sorry Roach, I'm just super shy about my art!)

What would be your dream car: Me and my family had a running joke that I liked Tesla's, so probably a Tesla

Do you sing in the shower: No but I want to, I just don't like people hearing me sing

Do you believe in aliens: I believe we're not alone in the universe, weather it be new life billions of miles away or way advanced life a few galaxies away

Do you often read your horoscope: No, but astrology is fun to fuck with sometimes

What is your favorite letter of the alphabet: probably E or something, it's soothing in a weird way

Dinosaurs or dragons: DRAGONS DRAGONS I LOVE DRAGONS I'M A HUGE HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON NERD!!!

What do you think about babies: They're sweet sometimes, I'm honestly afraid of holding one or having to take care of one though

Freebie! Ask anything you can think of: I can't really think of anything so I guess just @psychotic-roach I love you!! @the-strawzish-clownfish thank you for these painful asks, they were fun :)

[marril96]

The Distance Between Us

Chapter 4: Beauty and the Beast

Pairing: Rowena x reader

Summary: Lucifer is an asshole, and Sam is worried.

Editor: @cherrypierowena

Bollocks!

As if it wasn't bad enough that she was stuck having to tutor you this entire semester — you and your little gang just had to be at Biggerson's.

Some bloody luck she had.

Poor Sam. The lad deserved better than to be stuck with the likes of you and Lucifer's awkward brother. Not to mention her own brother. Fergus was the lowest of the low. What made Sam want to hang out with him, she didn't know. It certainly wasn't his personality.

"It's our bros," Lucifer said snidely while they waited for their orders to arrive.

"We're so bloody lucky," Rowena deadpanned.

He snickered. "It's like a family reunion."

"Ugh."

Hell to the no.

She resented every cell, every drop of blood, every atom she shared with Fergus. If there was a way to sever familial ties with him, to stop being related to him, she would do it. She would jump at the chance.

Sadly, all she could do was pretend he wasn't there and make snarky commentary. It wasn't nearly enough, but it was something.

The server brought their orders over; Rowena's sandwich and iced tea, and Lucifer's disgusting greasy burger with mayonnaise, ketchup, mustard, and a few other things she didn't recognize and Coca Cola. She didn't like to admit it, but the boy was a pig. Even worse than Dean Winchester. Sometimes she wondered why she was dating him.

Which was stupid, because she knew why.

She needed him.

His horrible sides she just had to deal with.

Nothing in life was free.

"So," Lucifer said, taking a huge bite out of the abomination that was his burger. Red and yellow smears circled his mouth. "You really agreed to tutor Y/N?"

God. Not even Gavin, Rowena's five-year-old brother, ate that messily.

She was dating a toddler.

"I was basically forced into it," she said, shuddering at the memory. Why did Mr. Shurley have to do that to her? She thought he liked her.

He made her tea — bloody good tea — every time she came to visit Lucifer. Was nice to her. Never talked down to her.

Only to pull this nonsense.

It wasn't fair.

She didn't want to tutor you.

She didn't want anything to do with you or anyone else from your little gang. Aside from Sam, who, unlike the rest of you, wasn't a loser.

"Your father's an arsehole."

Lucifer snickered. "Told you so."

He did. Plenty of times. And every time she shook it off, said she thought he was nice.

Biggest mistake of her life.

Raising an eyebrow in curiosity, Lucifer asked, "You gonna do it?"

"I have to, don't I?" Rowena responded, helpless, dejected. Pathetic.

She'd said yes. Had signed a verbal contract. There was no getting out of it now.

He snorted as if it was the most ridiculous thing in the world.

Which it kind of was.

If someone had told her a week ago she would agree to tutor a loser girl, she would have thought them mental. And said so to their face in far less nicer words.

"It's not funny!" she hissed.

"It's hilarious," Lucifer countered, grinning like the arsehole he was. She sure knew how to pick them. "You're not gonna get anywhere with her. She's dumb as a stump."

"Don't you think I know that?"

She would be wasting her time, and for what? A barely solid D? If you even got that. Any future F of yours was on her. If you failed, in the eyes of Mr. Shurley and Ms. Hanscum, she failed as well.

The dumb were incurable, but she doubted they cared about that.

She was expected to perform a miracle. All for a clean record and extra credit.

Some would call it a fair exchange.

Rowena called it nonsense.

"You're smart, babe," Lucifer said, nodding, "but not that smart."

"Thank you," she said sarcastically.

What a supportive boyfriend he was.

"Y/N's a moron. I heard she almost failed math two times."

You failed two whole years, Rowena wanted to say, but she elected to keep the retort to herself. She didn't want to look as if she were defending you. Even if it was true.

When it came to school, Lucifer was a tool. But what he lacked in brains he made up for in brawn. Evened things up a tad.

"She was close to it Freshman year, as well," Rowena added.

"My, you won the lottery with that one!" Lucifer laughed.

She groaned. "Thanks to your father."

"Like I said, told you so."

One thing was for sure — she didn't find Charles Shurley cool anymore.

With a father like that, no wonder Lucifer was a bastard.

"You should teach her wrong. Make her fail every test," he said, beaming as if he'd just come up with a cure for cancer.

Rowena was mortified. "Do you want my record to get worse?"

He chuckled as if it was the funniest thing in the world. "You're taking this way too seriously." His tone was nonchalant, like he was talking about the weather. "You got a few smudges on your record — so what? Look at me!"

Aye, look at him. Look at his grades. And his attendance. And his behavior. The way things were going, he wasn't going to graduate — again. One more slip and he might get kicked out. Not even his father could get him out of that one.

It was easy for someone like him to judge someone like her.

"Who cares about college?" he added.

"I care!" she snapped. She bloody cared. She cared about her future, which she hoped would take her far, far away from this blasted town. Lucifer could always count on his father to have his back with money. She wasn't so lucky. Her mother barely made ends meet on her minimum wage job. "Not all of us have a daddy with money to take advantage of!"

She knew she'd made a mistake as soon as the words spilled out.

Lucifer glared at her with murder in his eyes. His fingers wrapped around her wrist, tight as rope. Dug into her sensitive flesh. Nails bit crescent marks into her skin.

Rowena returned the glare, hers just as deadly, just as threatening. Fear shimmered under the surface; she willed it back, begged it not to show. She could handle this. She always did.

"Watch your pretty mouth, Rowena," he hissed.

Hit a nerve, did she?

One of her most impressive talents.

"Let go of me," she hissed back. He couldn't grab her like that in public. What if someone saw?

He stared at her for a long moment, let his threat sink in. Then he released her, and clasped his hand over hers softly, gently, as if nothing bad had ever happened. As if he hadn't grabbed her so hard bruises had already started to blossom over her wrist.

There was a time she was terrified of this side of him. Now, after many months, she just accepted it. It was who he was. A part of him she couldn't change no matter how hard she tried. The only thing she could do was accept it.

So he got a bit rough with her from time to time.

He wasn't perfect. Neither was she.

What was she supposed to do? Leave him?

She'd worked so hard to get with him to do that.

A few bruises were nothing in comparison to what he gave her. To what being with him gave her.

Nothing in life was free.

A few moments passed in silence so uncomfortable it could be cut with a knife. Then Lucifer smiled and said in his sweetest, kindest tone, "You'll be a great tutor."

As if nothing had ever happened.

*****

Rowena's phone rang at exactly nine PM, startling her from her thoughts of boredom. Lucifer and Olivette had invited her out with them and their gang, but after the day she'd had, she didn't feel like being around people.

People were a bother.

Even her friends and boyfriend.

They were, dare she say, an even worse nuisance.

One she'd chosen, but still. She couldn't deal with them. Didn't want to deal with them.

Let them get blackout drunk and make absolute fools of themselves without her.

Seeing Sam's name on the screen brought a smile to Rowena's face. He was her favourite friend. Her only true friend, if she dare say so. He liked her as she was. Treated her with nothing but kindness. Never talked down to her or acted as if she were lesser, as if she owed him something.

The lad was the definition of a best friend.

"Hey," she said in her happy tone she always uses to greet him. He deserved nothing less.

"Hey," he said back. "How come you're home? I thought for sure you'd be at Garth's party."

Garth was the only loser boy the popular kids tolerated, mostly because he often had the house to himself and happily let them party there. And sometimes supplied them with alcohol.

Rowena scrunched up her face in disgust. "No bloody way!"

She hated parties like that. People drinking like animals, and afterwards acting like animals… It was disgusting. Undignified.

Her idea of a party was something more classy, with suits and evening gowns and alcohol in reasonable amounts. Saying that out loud usually earned her raised eyebrows and mocking snickers, but those didn't bother her. After all, she wasn't the one drooling on the floor after shagging a couch thinking it was a person.

Sam laughed. "Figures."

Rowena let out a chuckle of her own. "Why'd you call me if you were so sure I was there?"

"Thought it was worth a try."

"Fair." She had to give him that. "I take it Dean's there."

"Mhm. Texted me a few minutes ago. I can't really make out what he was trying to say, but I'm pretty sure he'd just earned the title of keg master."

Of course he had.

"Impressive."

"Really impressive," Sam agreed through laughter.

"Seriously, though, what's with the call?" Rowena asked, clearing her throat. Usually she and Sam chatted. Quicker and more comfortable than phone calls.

"I, uh, wanted to ask how you're doing. With everything."

Her hand instinctively flew to her wrist, started rubbing it. The place Lucifer's fingers had stabbed into were raw, sore, light bruises already blooming.

She would have to hide them with makeup tomorrow before school.

Not a big deal, she told herself. She'd done it before. No one would notice — they never did. She was a professional.

"The whole tutoring thing," he clarified. "And Y/N."

"I'm… good."

Sort of.

"That's great." He was silent for a few moments, took a couple of breaths for courage, then said, "I know you two don't like each other, but it's gonna be fine. Y/N's not that bad."

It took everything in Rowena's power not to explode into laughter.

You were bad. You were a loser. A bum. The kind of girl who was perfectly content with her place at the bottom of the barrel.

She, on the other hand, had fought tooth and nail to never be there again.

She couldn't understand people like you. Happy in their misery. Lifting not a single finger to change it, to better your lives.

You disgusted her.

"I suppose we'll make it work," she said.

As long as you listened and did what she asked of you, it would work.

Sam sighed. "Can you give her a chance?"

No way in hell.

"Sam—"

"Please. She's not the best student, but she's smart. She just needs a chance."

She could picture him giving her the puppy eyes.

Bollocks!

"Fine." The word tasted foreign on her tongue. Foul somehow. "For you. But she'd better be on her best behaviour! I've no patience for slackers!"

"She will be," Sam said, relieved. Elated. "Thank you."

"Like I said, it's for you," Rowena said nonchalantly.

She didn't like you, not one bit. But for Sam, she could pretend. She could tolerate you. For a few measly hours she could forget about the school hierarchy and look at you like a person rather than a loser.

In theory, that was.

It shouldn't be hard, she told herself. After all, it wasn't like she loathed you. You were just an unappealing person, that was all. She could deal with that. Maybe. Sort of. Hopefully.

She did deal with Lucifer.

One loser girl shouldn't be a problem.

"Well, I appreciate it," Sam said.

She knew he did. Thing about him was, he was genuine. A good person. A good friend.

Rowena sometimes wondered what he was doing, being friends with her. What was it that he saw in someone like her?

You, she understood. You were a loser, but, as much as she hated to admit it, you stood for your principles. You were truly, unapologetically you, no matter what she or other popular kids thought. You believed in something.

Rowena wanted popularity. Wanted to be on top of the food chain. And she'd worked her hardest to get there, no matter how many people she had to put down on her way up.

She wasn't proud of it, but it got her where she was now. That she was proud of. Her hard work. Her dedication and effort and drive. Her aim that could, if she wanted so, reach the stars themselves.

People like you looked down on her for that. She didn't particularly care what you — any of you — thought, but…

Sam was one of you.

Technically.

His opinion mattered.

Strange as it was, he seemed to think highly of her. Highly enough to be her friend.

She couldn't comprehend what it was that he saw in her, but she hoped it was something good.

Because, the way things were, she needed someone to see the good in her.

She'd lost the ability to long ago.

*****

@werewolfbarbie @oswinthestrange @songofthecagedmoose @apurdyfulmind @getthesalt-sam @metallihca @salembitchtrials @jay-eris @hellsmother @elizabeth-effie @victoriasagittariablack @rowenaswife @wonderifshelikesroses @xfireandsin @liddell-alien @hotdiggitydammit @lae-lae @darkhumorsblog @gaysnakess @angel7376 @cherrypierowena @ruthieconnells @evil-regal-vampiress @collectorofsecretsandsouls @angel-e-v-a @melisandre02 @a-queen-and-her-throne