#that by the end im sure shed just do anything to see him happy again | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

tldix · 19 days ago

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started with Trouble

pt. 2

pairing: joelmillerXf!reader

warnings: this one’s SAD yall, angsty asf. a bit of fluff, some implied anxiety, 2 mc deaths (not joel or reader), some mentions of depression. (as always lmk if i missed anything)

a/n: chapter 2 is here!!! again i am SO sorry for having such a heartbreaking chapter in store, i promise things do get better. only happy endings here. speaking of i have actually no idea how many parts this will be (im thinking anywhere from 6-10) i appreciate all the love, feedback, & support i got on the first chapter. i hope i can live up to all your expectations 🫶🏼🫶🏼

it was warm, it was honestly disheartening. your grandfather was sick, joel & tess started staying at your place. their apartment almost long forgotten, every book joel ever seen you pick up he brought over. most of their things took up the space in the spare room available. they traded shifts with you to watch after your grandpa so you could get some sleep. joel & tess decided it was best if they did most of the trades now, so you’d be allowed more time with your grandpa. this went on for weeks, playing chess with your grandfather, making sure he had his coffee, polishing any piece of jewelry either of you still owned. doing anything possible to keep your mind busy. joel noticed, he just didn’t know what to say. today was the day, you were finally seeing a doctor. it took a lot of charm & more ration cards than you’d care to ever admit but you felt the familiar sting at tears in your eyes as you approached the run down building. tears you’d never let shed anywhere but the bathroom floor of the moldy apartment

as you slowly walked your grandpa up the steps, he stumbles back. a fit of coughing catching you off guard, you quickly find your place at his side. guiding him the rest of the way, slowly entering the makeshift doctors office? could you really even call it that? there were 6 chairs lining the walls, a broken coffee table in the middle. your eyes scanned the room, a group of men a little older than you, bloody & bruised huddled close together. a kid in the corner, no older than 6. his eyes were bloodshot & from where you were sitting he looked like he was burning up. you took a seat, right beside your grandpa. you waited for seemingly hours. finally the doctor called his name

“alright grandpa cmon, i got you”

you say as you carefully help him up,holding his arm as you follow him into the exam room. the room was cold, a bitter cold. one that shook you right to your bones, the doctor asks for his symptoms, how long the pains been going on. you noticed a look the doctor & your grandpa shared. you find your brow furrowing but just as soon as the doctor noticed the gaze vanished as fast as it appeared. maybe you imagined it. after hearing his answers you chose it was best to tune it out. as the doctor examined your grandpa, his only responses were a exhausted nod & a few sympathetic glances your way. you hated doctors, even in the real world you’d have to be drug to one kicking & screaming. you weren’t happy to be here, you didn’t like pity. you especially didn’t like pity if it was coming from a 5’9 ‘doctor’ who seemed to clean for a world like this

you find yourself fidgeting with the hem of your shirt, the doctor steps in front of you. lightly tapping on your shoulder to get your attention

“can i speak with you outside for a moment?”

you stuttered, you didn’t expect him to pull you to the side. if anything was wrong wouldn’t he just tell grandpa? regardless you found your feet hitting the floor, trudging out of the room. you hear the sound of a door softly closing as you whip around, the doctors eyes hold so much sadness. so much pity, it makes you nauseous.

“maam, after my exam it’s come to my attention that your grandpas matter cannot be treated. i’m so sorry”

tears stinging your eyes again, you glance up praying for any sign of joking or maybe even dishonesty. that couldn’t be right, he was fine.

“um i’m sorry what? he uh he just started getting sick. it’s just a cough, he’s got no energy. maybe a virus?”

the doctor, Ben you’ve learned after reading his tag informs you

“i’m sorry maam. i wish it was, it appears your grandpa has symptoms of late stages of lung cancer. there’s nothing we can do from here but try our best to make him as comfortable as possible. if you need anything, stop by anytime”

your world shattered, there was no way. how could this be? the words cancer & no other way kept bouncing around in your mind. consuming you. you felt your knees buckle, the sobs came over you like a tide bringing you out to sea. your knees pressed into the worn concrete.

“ma’am, are you alright?”

ben, now kneeling down. placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. you quickly wipe your eyes, you find yourself nodding your head as you ask

“does he know?”

the doctor nods, not fully meeting your eyes.

“your grandpas been here before, a few months back. he voiced his concerns, he was an avid smoker & lung cancer runs in your genes.”

you tried to find comfort in his words but all you felt was misery, did he really know all this time? is that why he was so reluctant on coming here? coming back? you pushed open the door, eyes rimmed red

“trouble honey don’t cry, it’s alright. oh sweetheart i’m so sorry”

you quickly enveloped your grandpa in a hug, the doctor offers an apologetical nod before turning to find his next patient. you hesitantly walked your grandpa home, you made sure he got in his recliner. bringing him over a bottle of water & heating up a can of soup Joel had found last run.

“i’ll find medicine grandpa. you’ll get better, i’ll start going back out with joel & tess. i’ll find a cure”

your grandpas takes the soup carefully, sighing as he says

“ain’t no need for allat’ trouble. i’ve made my peace. i had a good life. there ain’t no cure out there for this”

the tears rim your eyes again, you plop down in the stool you drug over to sit beside your grandpa. you pick up his spoon & slowly start feeding him the soup; you know there’s no use in arguing with him. it’s clear he has his mind made up. as the night goes on you find yourself trying your hardest to tidy up. anything to distract yourself from the thoughts that threatened to consume you, you walk back to your seat. glancing over at your sleeping grandpa, you hesitantly pick up the copy of pride & prejudice joel brought over. opening it to the page you marked with a big maple leaf. after your eyes skimmed the same paragraph 6 times, you found yourself drifting off. your grandpas soft voice cut through right before the sleep sunk in.

“trouble, you awake hun?”

you quickly placed the book back down, quickly looking towards your grandpa. the sight your met with damn near breaks your heart, his dog tags. his most prized possession (besides you) hangs off the ends of his fingers.

“grandpa what are you doing?”

the tears are back, prickling & fighting for their way down.

“i’m givin you somethin to remember me by, cmon you used to play with em all the time growing up”

you carefully placed them in your hands, flipping them over letting the warm metal settle

“now trouble, when things get bad you get out of here. you don’t stick around. there’s gotta be more out there, a better life for you. one i couldn’t give you”

your grandpas eyes hold such a deep sadness, you weren’t sure how you’d ever missed it

“grandpa, i can’t just leave. you gave me the best life possible. you took care of me when no one else did. don’t say that”

he chuckles, wiping his own teary eyes

“you were my second chance at being the dad i never got to be, my biggest blessing in life. i’m so proud of you kid. just remember everythin i taught ya. things will work out fine”

you engulfed your grandpa in a hug, letting the tears fall as he tries to sooth you. eventually you find yourself scooting the couch as close as possible to him, wrapping your hand in his. as he was sure you drifted off to sleep he muttered

“i love you trouble, don’t accept no life you don’t deserve”

by morning; when you woke. your grandpa was cold, hand loosely holding yours.

the next morning, when joel & tess got back he was over the moon to announce the new found meds. well, the meds he traded most of his goods & a few ration cards for. he was practically beaming, over the last few months joel & your grandpa grew extremely close. bonding over how your grandpa was in the marines & how tommy spent some time in the army. your grandpa adored tess, said she was your sister in another life. it’s been a long time; a really long time before joel felt so… happy?

as he stumbles up your steps, tess not far behind he’s not expecting to be met with the corner. his heart drops to his stomach, the dirt around his eyes must surely be playing tricks on him. they were gone 2 days. only 2 days. what the hell happened.

tess steps infront of joel, pushing in the house to see the recliner empty. she trudged through until she found you; weeping in the corner of the moldy bathroom. joel was at a loss for words, how did this happen? wasn’t it just a cold? he rubs a hand through his hair as he takes in the scene, everything was so out of place. why was the couch half way across the room? why was the kitchen even darker than usual? why did that god for saken recliner have to be empty.

he wished he had answers, he wished he could find anything to say. just something that could measure up to the gap that was left behind, joel took in his surroundings. checking through the pieces of paper on your grandpas magazine stand mindlessly, his heart stops. a letter. addressed to joel. in seemingly your grandpas hand writing.

he glances around before hesitantly opening it, his eyes start to water as he begins to read. he couldn’t cry here. you needed him.

Joel,

weird getting a letter from a dead guy right? okay, yeah you’re right maybe it’s not the best time for my old man jokes. i know you have questions; i know you want answers so that’s what this is for. i know it ain’t like sitting in the living room, sharing some whiskey while we play chess but this is gotta do. has too.

lung cancer. that’s what the doc told me, said it was even more common now that the fuckin’ world ended. just my luck, survive them damn creeps just to be taken by something so stupid. who gets cancer after the world ends? in a world like this, things like cancer don’t cross your mind. i wish it had; maybe there would’ve been something i could’ve done sooner.

as far as my girl, trouble. please look out for her joel, i know it’s a lot to ask. i know you really can’t trust nobody no more but i trust you. i hate myself for bein such a coward. once i found out, i didnt know how to even say it. don’t think i wanted too. i dont wanna leave my little girl. promises are useless, you once told me this once & i agreed with you. but this, what im asking of you isn’t useless. call it my dying wish

get outta Boston, grab whatever gear i got & go. take trouble & tess away from here. (all those sewer shifts payed off. check the floorboards in the bathroom) FEDRAS only getting worse & it’s just a matter of time before them fireflies try to start shit here too. find a good life, a life you could all be happy. you’re a good man joel. don’t let this world break you.

love, grandpa.

a month had passed, joel mentioned the letter. you decided you’d read it when you needed too, thanking him but keeping it as short. in the front pocket of his pack, he kept it close wrapped around tinfoil so nothing would ever harm it. he took your grandpas last wish seriously. you were cold now, the light that once bounced in your eyes seemed to have vanished. joel returned back to his gruffness, keeping his eyes trained on you every second. a few more jobs, that’s all he had to do so you all could leave boston. tess & him drew up maps, planned as much as they could with you but ultimately decided they could figure it out. you were distant, tess was worried

“you think she’s okay”

tess finds herself asking joel, he decided to move his mattress into the living room. giving it to you & him taking the couch, he hardly slept. always keeping watch over you.

joel grunts as he slides the last few things in his pack, you only had 2 runs left. one for a battery & one for ammo.

“she’ll be helluva lot better once we’re outta here”

he grunts out, tess nods quietly. letting her eyes linger over your face. she notices the way the you grab at the dog tags while you slept, clinging to them like your life depended on it.

on the way to this trade, you seemed off. you always seemed off to joel these days, not that he’d ever mention it to you or even admit he noticed it but this was different. forgetting your jacket was the first tell. stumbling on some old rubble was the second. joel watched as you rubbed your shoulders trying to maintain any warmth your body produced. he hesitated, but ultimately without saying a word slides off his pack. taking off his jacket & handing it to you

you raise your eyebrows, the shock written clear as day over your face

“what’s this for?”

joel sighs

“you’re shivering. just take it”

you stare at the jacket for a beat before deciding to pull it over your shoulders. warmth spreading rapidly through that has absolutely nothing to do with the jacket.

the following night, after a successful run gaining their ammo it was called to celebrate. joel seen the light slowly returning to your eyes, you saw your grandpa in everything. you decided it was your reason to keep going, because he wanted you too. tess scored another bottle of whiskey, which was starting to be suspicious to joel. did she have a liquor supplier all this time & he was just oblivious? maybe distracted was the right word. he shrugged it off, quickly deciding if he did indeed know about the liquor distribution it probably wouldn’t have worked out in his favor.

you plop down on the couch, taking joels jacket off & sliding it onto the couch he’s been residing on. you plop down to your old smelly mattress, tess takes a seat beside you as joel finds himself settling into the worn couch.

an idea pops in your head, the led zeppelin cassette joel managed to get you still sat unplayed. after all the chaos with the runs & the death of your grandpa you didn’t feel as if you deserved even a smidge of joy. given the 3 shots you downed, you quickly had a change of heart. you skipped up & found your way over to the cassette player smiling

tess took notice of the way joel’s eyes lingered on you; following you like you were a special plate of china & the world around you was a bull. tess leans over, catching joel off guard as she whispers

“you’ve got it bad, don’t ya?”

despite the irritation, joel can’t help the faint smile tugging at his lips when tess averts her gaze back to you.

the last run, joel was estatic. well estatic in a joel grumpy miller way. you had all your supplies packed away. your grandpas dog tags hanging around your neck, the black bandana you found layering overtop of them. tess seemed happier, i mean joel & tess had plans to leave the QZ for months but never acted on it. they both silently agreed they couldn’t leave you behind. wouldn’t do it. so as heartbreaking as it was, when joel read the letter from your grandpa he made up his mind. it was now or never.

as things seem to go, especially since you appeared in joel’s life things were headed south. yep, this trade was going so far south he didn’t know how to handle it; not south in the ways you’d expect. everyone was safe, well everyone but Marlene & her crew. they got attacked. right before you all arrived, she was begging. pleading. if you deliver the kid, you’d get a full car. not just some rinky dink battery you were taking a 50/50 chance on. sounded easy enough. things weren’t ever “easy” anymore though. tess seemed to be right on board, joel reluctantly agreed but you didn’t seem okay with it at all. who brings a kid into this world? did she have anyone looking after her? it’s obvious she seemed pretty cared for but was this a set up? you tried to push down these thoughts, she really is just a kid after all. what’s the worst that could happen?

marlene speaks up, seemingly trying to speak only to tess

“she’s not cargo, she’s important. you just have to get her to the safe house”

you find yourself crossing your arms, the hesitance apparent on your face as you ask

“what’s so important about one kid?”

marlene visibly is getting annoyed, you can’t really tell if it’s that or the fact she has a bullet wound in her gut

“that’s none of your business trouble”

you pushed off the wall, heading out the door & finding a shaded spot near the concrete walls. you pull an apple out of your bag, cutting it in 2 as you snack on it. 5 minutes later, joel’s the first one out the door. grunting & muttering to himself, tess steps out with the girl

joel is immediately skeptical, you’re openly annoyed

“we don’t do babysitting”

he gruffs out in the direction of tess & the girl, ellie.

“especially for teenagers”

you add. regardless of how you feel, you accept the job. joel doesn’t hesitate after hearing your agreement, knowing it’s the best chance of getting out of the QZ they had.

from the moment you met ellie, it was clear as day you’d bump heads. ellie’s sarcasm & rebellious nature annoyed you to no end. maybe it’s because you’re used to being the sharpest tongue of the group, always quick with a witty comeback. but this girl? she was like sarcasms final boss.

ellie grins widely, glancing around at life outside the compound.

“so who’s the grumpy old man & the bossy lady?”

you deadpan, eyeing ellie as you say

“don’t matter. im the one wholl leave your ass behind if you don’t shut it”

ellie snickers, finding her steps falling back to match tess

“oh i like her”

tess snickers to herself, letting her head drop to her feet. ellie smiles brightly, maybe things would be more interesting than she initially thought.

3 days pass as they make the trek, they have to move through a subway station. it’s not ideal. even in the slightest, everyone knows that but seemingly ellie. you know she’s just a kid, she never had a life outside of this. she doesn’t know what runners & clickers even are really. this is what makes you the angriest, they send this girl to school. teaching her things that were deemed “necessary” but to you, everything she learned was bullshit. why wouldn’t you teach kids about this type of thing? why did they need to know about photosynthesis but not how to shoot a rifle. you shook your head in disbelief but found yourself never uttering a word about it. you’d probably get looked at like you were crazy. who in their right mind would willingly give a 14 year old a gun? yeah, maybe you were officially losing it.

in the subway; you stay behind ellie. joel leads, you make sure she ducks down when she should, turning off her flashlight so it wouldn’t draw the attention of any runners. it was ridiculous, like teaching a toddler to walk. did no one care about this girls safety? joel made quick work of every runner around, deciding it’d be easier to sneak around the clickers than just running into a losing battle. the nod & barely audible grunt he gave you was enough to know this was the plan.

everyone picked up on it, well. besides ellie of course, she charged a clicker. head on, stabbing it in the neck multiple times. 2 more clickers made their way quickly to the group, joel took one down as the other tried desperately to gnaw on tess. you scuffled up, ran over & threw tess your knife. she stabbed it, letting it go limp on her body. as you pull it away you find yourself spinning around to ellie

“do you ever listen? no. you’re reckless kid, & one day it’s gunna get you killed”

ellie chuckles

“yeah well maybe i’ve picked that up from you”

joel leans against the wall, hearing the entire argument he decides to speak up. trying his absolute hardest to hide the smallest smirk falling on his face.

“she’s got a point trouble. kids just a smaller version of you”

both you & ellie glare at him, shouting in unison

“shut up, joel”

fuck. that’s all you could think when the FEDRA officers stopped you. they grabbed tess aggressively, pulling her to her knees as they check her. making sure she’s not infected, the bulkier officer throws ellie to the ground.

“hey she’s a kid, get the fuck off her”

struggling under the officers weighted grip you try to break away. he pushes you harder, enforcing you to the ground.

“check em”

one of the officers says, an officer joel recognized as a man he often made deals with. a man who warned joel before they left that FEDRA wasn’t playing around, they were taking curfew seriously since they got word of a potential firefly attack.

nick, the officer joel recognizes speaks in the radio

“got 4 here. breaking curfew. armed”

you hold your breath, feeling the familiar sting of the scanner as it shoots through your neck. green. they move to joel, you glance at him seeing the fear in his eyes. why was he so scared? he was always fearless. green. at the last second, as the last officer moves to scans ellie he hears another officer cut through the radio

“kill em”

joel acted before he thought, he quickly took down nick. slashing at his throat before you pounced on the bulkier officer. tess quickly sprung into action helping you take the man down. as you back peddled & stood your face dropped. tess was holding the scanner, only it was red. infected. your hand slaps over your mouth, joel looks at ellie furiously as he quickly grabs his rifle

ellie looks panicked

“wait wait. it’s old. it’s 3 weeks old. it’s healed see”

she raised up the arm of her long sleeve, showing a scar over the bite. could it really be healed? sure there was rumors there were some potential immune out there. you never personally met anyone so you just chalked it up to some urban legend people started to find peace in this bat shit world.

you quickly find yourself standing infront of ellie, almost instinctively. joel hesitantly lowers his weapon as he meets your eyes. you try to signal everything was okay, if it wasn’t it’d be on you. the look joel gave you, was one you hadn’t seen in a long long time. the look of lucifer you called it, he straps up his weapons as he quickly makes his way away from the scene before you.

you jog up to him

“don’t worry joel. it looked healed. maybe she really is immune. she’s just a kid”

joel grunts, not meeting your eyes as he says

“kids can turn too. dont mean shit”

you roll your eyes, sighing as you find yourself back in step with tess. ellie lingering not far behind. she knew you’d find out, she really wanted to tell you but what did that matter now? the truth was out. joel hated her even more, tess seemed so hesitant with her but you? she couldn’t wrap her head around why you ran in front of her. she assumed you & joel were together, if not then extremely close. why would you jump infront of a gun, the man you seemingly loved was holding just to protect some random girl you met only days ago.

as you find your way into an abandoned warehouse; joel turns to tess

“are you sure this is a good idea?”

tess sighs, fighting back her own fears. biting them back, deciding she’d rather choke on them than voice them. she knows the girl can’t handle anymore doubt.

“yes joel, we need a car.”

ellie is sitting on the ground, a few feet from you as she digs out a nicely wrapped sandwich. you look at her in disbelief as she slowly snacks on it, you shake your head turning your attention back to tess & joel

“i mean it tess. if she so much as twitches”

ellie well being ellie, starts twitching. earning her a glare from tess but a quite chuckle from you. joel turns to you, glaring disapprovingly. he could barely handle one of you, let alone 2. he was in a world of trouble

tess. that seemed to be the only word your mind would spin around. it wasn’t supposed to be like this. tess was supposed to be here through the end. you were supposed to find a new beginning together. your bestfriend. you feel ellie tugging you towards joel as tess stands before you. she smiles at you, a smile you’d commit to memory. a smile you’d never let your mind forget, as she admits she is indeed infected. how could this happen? there’s no way tess, the only other person in the world you trusted other than joel could die. you’ve already lost too much. she mouths.

“i love you, stay outta trouble for me”

the tears brimming your eyes can’t even begin to explain the rage you feel. the hurt & the misery. tess couldn’t be gone. no. that’s impossible. just yesterday she was helping you braid your hair. the day before she was picking nuts with ellie, teaching her which ones she could eat & which ones would make her deathly sick.

every impossible thing, or seemingly impossible thing your mind wandered too you couldn’t help but admit they didn’t happen. your grandpa died. leaving you alone. you left boston qz. you took in a 14 year old girl to smuggle. tess died.

your minds spinning, you’re running on rage. as the light at the end of the tunnel blares through you make quick work on climbing up to it. breathing in the fresh air, letting the tears fall

joel stays back with ellie, avoiding every question. keeping his eyes trained on your back. he’s hurting, tess was his partner. his bestfriend. but you? god he can’t imagine how you feel. loss after loss. heartache after heartache. he lets his mind slip to how he felt the night he lost sarah, could you be feeling that bad? joel promised himself he’d never let you turn into the type of person he was. a vengeance hungry, rage driven man.

ellie starts her questioning early, like who was tess to joel. who was she to you. he reluctantly answered the first few

“tess was my friend, was troubles best friend. knew her real long time.”

joel decides to keep it short, give ellie enough information to keep her satisfied but nothing was ever enough with this girl

“how long did you know tess?”

joel sighs, becoming quickly fed up. he doesn’t know why he thought he could do this. talk about her like he wasn’t still processing everything that just happened.

“look, kid. we’re setting some rules. rule 1. don’t bring up tess. ever. let’s keep our histories to ourselves. 2. don’t tell anyone about your uh. condition. people out there won’t think twice’ they’ll think you’re crazy or you’re lyin’. rule 3. do what i say, when i say it. no arguing bout it.”

joel looks to ellie, seeing if she’s taking any of this in or just downplaying it

“ellie.you taking this seriously? repeat it back to me.”

ellie sighs as he kicks a rock, she looks up to see you crouching down fishing out your water bottle as the top of the tunnel.

“do what you say, when you say it”

joel half expected you to turn cold like you did when you lost your grandfather, seeing you still laughing with ellie or teasing him made his heart swell. he knew you both missed tess, he also knew that there was an unspoken agreement between you two about not mentioning tess. you learned you liked coping with your grief privately. crying to yourself while you were on watch while joel pretended to sleep. he wanted to comfort you, let you comfort him. he wanted you to know he was there, literally right there & he’d stop the world if you asked him too. he ultimately understood, he didn’t pry. he’s no stranger to loss, over the years he just got better at dealing with it.

as the weeks pass on, you & joel both realize ellie’s lack of discipline was a major problem, she confirmed your suspicions that she grew up without her parents. she never really had any idea of authority other than teachers or marlene. no shocker there you thought as you strapped up your boots.

during the journey ellie finds herself constantly wandering off, finding any & everything about the outer world interesting. at first you found it endearing, that was until it often more times than not resulted with ellie in some sort of trouble. once being “quick sand” like mud, the next her being swarmed by runners as she climbed up a tree. ellie always seemed to get out just in the nick of time, it didn’t ease any of your anxieties though. as you drag her away from the sunflower field back to the makeshift camp you & joel put together you turn to her. scolding

“do you have a death wish? or are you just stupid?”

ellie chuckles, finding the scolding more amusing then fearful

“relax mom, i was just looking around”

you freeze, you know ellie’s teasing. even though you can’t deny you wouldn’t mind having such a bad ass kid, ellie was talented. she was smart & witty & super fucking cool. you couldn’t deny it, hell even joel wouldn’t deny it. you find yourself muttering

“don’t call me that”

as you briskly walk away, ellie laughs lightly as joel just grunts. he notices the way your shoulders tensed. the way you were like a deer in headlights, he couldn’t imagined he’d act any differently if roles were reversed. he decided against following you; taking back to his back of skinning a rabbit.

one night by the fire, after you finally convinced joel to sleep you found yourself missing your grandfather & tess. you always missed them but tonight was different. you let your mind wander to the “what if they were still here”. you know your grandpa would’ve insisted on playing chess everytime you made camp, you knew tess would find some way to make the situation seem safer. she had such a good way of just making everything feel okay, even if she was intimidating as shit.

you kept seeing flickers of silver in the moon light, you knew ellie wasn’t asleep. her breaths weren’t gentle & she was squirming too much. you glance over to her

“something on your mind kiddo?”

ellie hesitates before she sits up, pulling out the switchblade into your view as she sighs

“someone gave me this. before they, ya know”

you find yourself nodding, understanding the weight of loss. if anyone did; it was you.

“i get it. i carry my grandpas dog tags everywhere it’s stupid but-“

ellie cuts you off almost immediately, not even letting you utter the last words of your sentence. you look up to her shaking her head profusely

“it ain’t stupid”

joel finds himself stuck between your fiery personality & ellie’s stubbornness more often times than not. he doesn’t say much, letting the excitement or the argument die out on its own. a few times he’s had to intervene, reminding you of the task at hand. the fireflies. getting the car. maybe finding tommy? he hasn’t brought this up to you yet. he tells himself it’s the fear of you declining but he knows you’d be more than happy too, maybe he need to swallow the truth. what if tommy’s no longer out there waiting for him? the last time he heard from tommy, was from the radio months ago. he knew tommy was apart of some firefly group out west but that’s all the information he knew about it. he hated the fireflies, almost as much as he hated FEDRA. both groups seemed to be good at one thing, ripping is family from him.

as the day moves on, he can’t help but let his thoughts move to you. it’s been so long since he felt any sort of attraction. he tried so desperately hard to shove these feelings down, bury them so deep that they’d never resurface. after losing tess, it just pushed you both closer. he realized he was moving his sleeping bag closer to yours & ellies, he noticed the way he sacrificed anything possible just for you two to have more. food, water, sleep. it didn’t matter to joel, the only thing that did was the hope that maybe. just maybe, you’d eventually feel something for him.

joel watches you with ellie, seeing the way your eyes light up as she sketches any & everything you suggest. the way you smile to yourself as your do ellie’s hair, the way you read a chapter of frankenstein to her every night. he loved listening to your endless bickering. he knew ellie adored you, even if she refused to actually tell you

“you’re good with her, lot better than you think”

did he really just say that out loud? since when did joel speak his mind about any sort of feelings?

you shake your head, averting your gaze past the fire to where ellie lays with her back turned. a small smile graces your face & joel swears his heart grows 3 times the size

“she hates me cowboy”

joel chuckles, half for hearing the word cowboy leaving your mouth after months of just calling him joel or miller. he couldn’t be happier; the other half for how oblivious you are too the seemingly perfect match you & ellie made.

“she’s just like you. that’s why yall clash”

you shake your head, quickly standing & finding your way to your sleeping bag. leaving joel to stand on watch, he loved being on watch. knowing for 100% certain he could protect you & ellie made him content. every bristle of leaves his gaze darted around the forest. in all actuality he knows, you made sure they went so far out that there was no way any things lived out here.

“maybe a fucking bear or two though”

ellie muttered behind you; you stifled a laugh. as joel replayed this memory he’s started by ellie quickly plopping down in front of the fire before joel

“so you & trouble, huh? that’s so bad ass”

joel grunts

“ain’t like that”

ellie chuckles

“sure it’s not”

#joel miller fluff #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x female reader #the last of us fic #joel miller angst #joel miller series #joel miller x reader #joel miller tlou #joel tlou #joel x reader #joel the last of us #tlou fanfiction #tlou #the last of us fanfiction #the last of us #startedwithtrouble

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finedinereception · 1 year ago

Text

some details on what im tentatively calling wizard married au- in which betty is here from the start and happily magic married to her equally deranged husband.

past

like canon, betty flees when simon first wears the crown. however, there is no portal to the future this time. she finds somewhere else to stay, and during that time, she begins researching. she can tell that wasnt normal. surely if it had just been simon, he would have shown some symptoms of whatever that breakdown was. it had to have been the crown.

she pours herself into her research. it saves her life, because a few weeks later the bombs drop.

she uses her research to attain magic powers, a la magic betty. like simon, she obtains immortality. however, she loses her sanity the more she uses her magic.

a while after the bombs, she finally meets simon again. by this time hes picked up a travel buddy- marceline. the two of them are relieved and happy to see each other.

the apocalypse ironically saves their relationship.

turns out knowing you and your man are going insane and losing your memories is a pretty sobering, emotional thing to really grasp. it ends up breaking the wall between them, and theyre finally, finally able to begin sorting out the issues in their relationship.

this is an important moment between them. even when they fully lose themselves, it becomes the basis of their future relationship. betty starts doing things for herself, and simon starts paying more attention so he can stop her if she starts focusing too much on him again.

its never easy, but for a while, they get a sort of peace. a surprise family at the end of the world.

simon loses it first. during the night, when marceline is asleep, he tells betty that he has to go. hes held on longer than canon simon thanks to betty being around, but hes finally slipping, and hes worried hes going to hurt marcy. sure, betty could protect her… but shed be expending her own mind if she did so. betty knew this was coming, and they agree.

simon leaves before marcy wakes up, taking nothing but a scrapbook hed been keeping from before the bombs, and the clothes on his back. they should have waited- its something theyll regret in the far, far future. he should have said goodbye. but they didnt think they had the willpower to go through with it if they heard her begging. at the very least, betty is there to offer support.

betty continues to hang out for several more years. she gets to see marceline grow up. marcy can see with every spell that betty is becoming more reckless, more eccentric, more distant.

betty finally loses herself protecting marceline during a vampire hunt. she holds on just long enough to get herself away from marcy.

and she begins to travel. until one day, she finds herself inexplicably drawn to a land of ice.

they dont remember who simon and betty are. all they know is that hes ice king and shes magic queen and they love each other.

Betty Grof/Magic Queen

basically the “main character” of this au lol

she begins using the name “magic princess” when she can no longer remember her old one. it feels right to her. she changes to queen when she and ice king get hitched. she doesnt use the name “ice queen” because she no longer pins her identity to just simon. shes got her own stuff going on. hes part of her life, but not her entire life.

magic queens not around the ice kingdom as often as ice king. she likes to explore and travel! a huge amount of the books on ruins, dungeons, and artifacts were penned by her, from hands on research. shes well known around ooo as somebody who can be dangerous, but is also a very reliable source of information.

shes more “grounded” than ice king. she doesnt remember anything from before the war, or for a while after it. as far as she knows she just spawned on ooo ready to dungeon dive. still, shes better at retaining information, and can read a room better. shes still pretty eccentric, though, and likes showing off.

magic queen was the one who beat the shit out of ash and got his magic carpet. she doesnt remember marcy, but like ice king, finds herself inexplicably drawn to her. so when ash hurts her, it puts him on her shit list.

speaking of, she can hold a grudge. she ends up cursing finn for a while because he beat up ice king based on a misunderstanding.

shes the one who had the idea for a giant library in the ice kingdom. ice king helped with the room layout, and she collected the books.

magic queens doing a lot better mentally than canon betty was. her relationship with ice king has become way more healthy and balanced. shes happily married. she has 53 penguin children. shes been able to chase her dreams, and her work is acclaimed and respected.

shes still a creecher tho. girl is skittering through those dungeons. does a backflip and shoots fireworks into your eyes. she is very bold and loves doing crazy things just to see what happens.

gets her own “i remember you” episode where she takes marcy dungeon diving.

ice king/simon petrikov

stay at home husband now lmfao

but fr. he fully supports magic queen, but hes a pretty forgetful and clumsy guy, so they both agree that he probably shouldnt be dungeon diving with her.

he keeps things stable at home. takes care of the penguins and writes fanfic and plays music in his free time. hes come to really enjoy creative pursuits, even when hes not particularly good at them.

magic queen puts a gun to your head and forces you to read fionna and cake. ice queen (simone) and magic king (benny) if you even care btw.

mq ended up putting a checklist up in the home to make sure ik doesnt forget to take care of himself. eat breakfast you goof

instead of kidnapping princesses, he goes out often to find things mq has mentioned wanting or needing for her research. sometimes he steals them and it gets him in trouble. if hes being a real jerk mq will only step in to take him home. sometimes that man deserved to get his ass whooped.

hes already nicer and more stable to start out with since he has somebody to talk to whos nice to him. people wonder why magic queen sticks around and if you ask her she will get mad. hes funny!!! and sweet!!! also hes canonically caked up.

he wants to be a dad soooo bad. he spoils the penguins.

#adventure time #betty grof #simon petrikov #petrigrof #marceline abadeer #wizard married au #they finally have a healthy and communicative relationship and it only took the end of the world #i have a lot of ideas here… maybe ill write out more if anybody is interested.#partially based on their cuter interactions in elements #the playing with birds scene lives rent free in my head

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theravencawsatmidnight · 5 months ago

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Part two

Leland Coyle x F! Reader

Summary: reader has been trying to escape the trials since she arrived. One night she stumbles along a house that is out of the way . It is occupied by Leland Coyle and he makes a deal with her: keep his house clean with dinner every night and you can stay here.

W! Not really. Hes just grabby

Coyle was still holding you in his grip with his palm cupping your cheek, his cheeky grin and cigarette inches from your shaking face. The man was so happy, “a new wife. Its about time, this my what 3rd? 4th? Ah it does not matter." The man stood up straight, finally letting you go, “its upstairs, but I'm sure you know that since ya was poking around in here” Coyle gestured to the stairs while removing his hat, belt, and setting his electric prod down on a nearby table. Without a moment to think you ran up the stairs back to the bedroom right into the restroom to spin the shower knob turning it on, your old dirty clothes were shedded within seconds and that alone was a relief for you. You were not putting them back on ever, quickly you stepped into the old tub letting the water hit you as you closed the raggy curtain . “god……..” you sighed with great relief, the pressure of the water was a little finicky but you did not care. Slowly you closed your eyes leaning on the tile wall just letting the warmth take over. After countless nights of sweat, blood and dirt covering you this was the greatest thing in the world right now. While you were washing you were looking around the restroom with your head poked out from the curtain, you spotted Coyle standing there, leaning on the door arms folded and cigarette burning lightly.

“..yes?” you asked a little confused.

“Lookin for something?” he asked while scanning around the room as if to mock you.

“Uhm.. a cloth to wash myself. “ you told him, holding the curtain to your body to cover it. Coyle leaned down, opening the cabinet under the sink to toss you a bright yellow cloth that hit you in the face. ‘Oww..” the cloth fell on your palm and it looked.. Brand new. “Have you used this?” you asked shooting him a look. “Nope” was all he said. “When was the last time you showered?”

“Couldn't tell ya sweetie” the man grinned at you as you rolled your eyes. “Okay come on.” you told him while moving to the side and going back behind the curtain. Coyle removed his shades, setting them on the sink and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror , a little dirty .. okay maybe very dirty.. Its not like being clean was on the mans to do list, all he had to do was scare and kill . nothing else mattered. He ended up staring for a long time… when was the last time he saw himself? The hurt the on the side of his face.. His eyes.. Anything. He never really cared to see any of it. “Hey, Coyle.” you poked your head out again. “Ill do it for you, you don't have to do anything if that makes you feel better. “ Coyle shook his head going to you to whip the curtain open with a grunt. “Comin” was all he said as he undressed to get in behind you. Gently you closed the curtain again and turned around with the cloth in your hand to see him looking very grumpy while you stared at his face with big curious eyes. You knew Coyle had gone through some things here in the trials but you never got an up close look at what had been done to him. He was human just like you, maybe that's what made you less scared right now. “Okay, ill start you first then me okay?” you told him as you reached to the side pulling a never opened bottle of soap off the side of the tub that said Murkoff Suds on it. As you were washing him up Coyle would reach over to squeeze your chest or rear only to get no reaction really from you. Instead he got a giggle and sometimes a “ easy there, im not done yet and i need to wash that hand” from you. He continued to grab you everywhere and it all just tickled. “Listen, I have a question?” you said as you scrubbed his chest for him freeing it of all the dirt and what not. Coyle clicked his teeth to smack your rear and grab it with force. “Yea sweetie?” he said as he moved his palm all around. “Uhm.. you said Murkoff delivers food to you? Have you ever requested something special? “ you asked him while fidgeting around since his hand was still roaming around. “Nope, dont care too” he told you. “But if ya wanna leave a note for them to pick up tomorrow morning go for it, if they do you wont get the stuff till the following day” the cloth in your hand was brought to your chest with hesitation, “uhm..” Coyle just rolled his eyes, moving his hand away to tilt your chin up . “i told ya they dont care, and i'm very sure they replaced ya by now, just leave it” you nodded once with a long sigh. “Okay,” if they did want to remove you from the home then.. At least the shower was nice.

After washing up you both got out of the shower, you pulled your panties back on leaving the rest on the floor. These clothes held too many nightmares, too many stories… instead you just went to the bed ready to fall on it when you stopped yourself to really look at it. “Its fine .. damn weirdo. “ he told you as he tossed a light blue shirt to you. Coyle was in some red checkered boxers and a tank top, he threw himself on the bed groaning loudly. “Mm.. okay.” you crawled into the bed on the free side feeling your muscles and head relax.”not so bad…” you said quietly. “I know, now shut up.” Coyle rolled to his side with his back to you. “In the morning i leave, back by i dont know maybe 10. I expect a clean house and dinner” he told you while staring out the window . Usually he would be all over his new wife , making her do whatever he wanted. But he could not get that image of himself out of his head… you managed to drift off not long after leaving Coyle alone with his thoughts.

Coyle left early morning like he said, he was putting on his hat getting ready to walk out the door when he stopped to roll his eyes. “Oh fuck me” he stomped up the stairs to check on you one last time to see you asleep. He stomped back downstairs leaving for real this time for the trials. You woke up a little later, it was a decent sleep, your nerves got the better of you a few times, waking you up to make sure you were still alive but besides that…it was an alright sleep. You got up, took a fast shower, got dressed and found a washing machine and dryer downstairs in a small room only there was no soap. “Mm… oh the supplies.” quickly you made your way to the back door peeking out the window to see a basket . slowly you opened the door, hoping nothing would stab you in the chest. You snatched the basket up, closing the door to see a can of beans, bread, butter and nothing else. “Okay.. pen.. Pencil…” after going through some draws you finally found a pencil and began writing down what you wanted on an old piece of tan cardboard you found. “Food, cleaning supplies….clothes. “ with a sigh you place the basket back on the doorstep with the cardboard in it . “Hopefully I'm still alive tomorrow” you told yourself as you started to clean up the house.

At the trials Coyle was a little lost in his head, having a new wife should be exciting… Why was he not excited.. He was at first but you seem different to him, a weirdo yea but different. The constant screaming , door slamming, pleading for lives filled his head drowning out any thoughts he had of you making him shake his head while biting into his smoke. Its not like he can tell anyone about what's happening either. He kicked a mannequin out of his way while he made his way down the hall to the main office room. “Gooseberry would just want to meet her and .. that damn guy with the shotgun would just kill her.’ he told himself over and over. He needed to get it together or the scientists would notice a change in his behavior, what the hell were you up to he wondered.

Meanwhile you were outside in the front yard gathering up some trash, the body parts freaked you out along with the puddles of blood but you would usually close your eyes as you tossed the items into the trash bag. “Ew ew ew …” was all you said. Back in the Murkoff building the basket was set on a table with the note not in it. One of the scientists was holding the piece of cardboard looking at it over and over as if he was seeing things. “Is Easterman here today?” he called out to anyone within hearing distance hoping to get an answer. After a few minutes the man walked into the room with one of his men with him. “In here? Thank you” he said politely dismissing the man with him. “Called for me?” he asked approaching the scientist who handed him the cardboard. “You need to read this, Coyle never leaves things in the basket we bring him every day” he told him quickly.

Easterman flipped the cardboard over then back to the front reading it over. “Can you please include more food, cleaning supplies, soap. And… womens clothes….?” the mans smirk traveled up his cheek as he let out a loud laugh. “What's that man doing? Do we have cameras in that area?” he asked as the scientist nodded, going to his desk to fiddle with the keyboard, changing the screens on the tv to the house. “Yes. just one.” said the man. Easterman and the scientist looked closely at the black and white screen to see you outside cleaning up. “Oh how interesting… which Regent is that?” “uhm… oh 47. She never returned yesterday. I think it was, figured she was dead.” Easterman turned to the note again trying to hold in his chuckle. “Hes playing house. Ill send someone to grab what she needs, maybe a notebook and pen too” “sir? Should we do nothing ? shes living in the trials.” the man waved his hand going to the exit. “Give her what she wants, Coyle will kill her soon enough. “ he told him as he left the room leaving the scientist confused.

It was nearly time to leave and Coyle was walking back to the house with his head up to stare at the pitch black walls around him that seemed to go on forever. It had been a very long time since he saw the sun, or a cloud. The first thing he noticed was the yard looked better and appeared to be swept revealing an old walkway that led to the door. The house did look better for the most part, Coyle never cared how it looked so he left it as is for a while and it eventually got dirty and messy. But now it was clean ish, the couch was in the corner of the room towards the left, the coffee table he always threw his dirty boots on was clean but still had some stains on it that would need soap , the rug needed a deep clean but the walls were freshly washed. He spotted a little box of his dirty clothes in the corner by the laundry room, he assumed it was supposed to be a dirty laundry basket. Ditching his dirty coat, pants and hat into the box the man dropped his electric prod on the coffee table along with his sunglasses and pack of smokes. He could smell food… coming from the kitchen. It smelled like the beans he was always sent and …something else. Going in he saw the beans cooked on an old plate with the bread baked and butter melting off of it, along with you asleep at the table with your arms on it to rest your head on . “still here.. Not dead huh?” Coyle said under his breath taking a chair next to you waking you up. He got a sleepy smile from you. “Welcome home.. I just made it, and it should still be hot. “ was all you said after letting out a yawn. He said nothing, just started eating and it tasted .. amazing. He had this nearly every day. How was it different now? Beans don't just change taste and the bread.. He never baked it, just ate it as it was . And he never thought to melt the butter on it, instead he would toss it in the trash. He was speechless as he ate this food. “I know.. Its not much but I asked for more so ..” your gaze went from him to the table to your hands that were fidgeting. “Did you eat?” he finally said and it made you look right up with wide eyes. “No uhm.. This was all they sent.” Coyle rolled his eyes . “When was the last time you did hm?” “i.. I dont remember but im okay i pro-” Coyle pulled your chair over picking you up and setting you on his lap “ eat something or i'm pushing you down the stairs” . “ah! Uhm… okay i uh. Thank you” you picked up his fork and Coyle wrapped an arm around your hips to feel around you and be all grabby. “Whatever.” was all he said while he watched you eat.

#coyle x reader #leland coyle x reader #the outlast trials #leland coyle

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sstarfruitt · 8 months ago

Note

hi! I saw requests were open and I had an idea. Could you please do something like it’s the wedding night and it would be great except ray is too focused on the fact that he’s married to actually proceed with the night portion of it? Please and thank u! ❤️

(btw love everything you’ve written so far!)

I Promise It's Real

Ray Stantz X Reader (SFW)

im glad ur enjoying my stuff so far! honestly, once I got to the end of this, I realize im not too sure I understood your request correctly, so if I got it wrong, feel free to lmk what I got wrong and ill write a diff version uwu

“Did I tell you how amazing you look?”

“Only about ten times already.”

Ray kept his eyes on you, a giddy smile on his face. He couldn’t get enough of you wrapped up in that beautiful wedding attire, even though it was already the end of the night, in the bedroom of your apartment. After a long, exciting day of wedding festivities, the two of you were finally home to relax and enjoy your first night together as a married couple.

“I mean it,” he answered.

You turned to look back at him, meeting his eyes with a warm smile. “Thank you, Ray,” stepping over to peck his cheek. You turned back to the closet, starting to get yourself out of your clothing.

“Want some help?” He asked.

“I’d appreciate it,” you answered, your voice lightly strained as you carefully tried to wiggle out of the fabric. Before you knew it, his warm hands were at your sides, helping you with zippers or buttons so you could get out of the layers of clothing. After a few minutes of struggling to get it all off without tearing anything, you were freed, standing in your underwear.

“Thanks, Ray,” you giggled, leaning up to kiss his cheek.

“Anything for you,” he answered with a smile. “Now, get into something warm and get into bed. I’ll join you in a minute.”

“Sounds like a plan,” you answered happily. You slipped into the pajamas that were laid out on the bed, and slid under the covers with a happy sigh. Relaxing into the pillows, you watched as he shed his suit for his own pair of warm pajamas.

“I’m gonna miss seeing you in that suit. You look so handsome in it,” you joked as he adjusted his waistband.

“Don’t worry, it’s not a rental. You’ll see it again,” he answered quietly, turning his head to smile at you as he adjusts his clothes. He padded over to the bed and pulled back the covers with a sigh. You grinned excitedly as he got under the covers beside you, and the second he was laid back, you scooted yourself over to press into his side. “Hey,” he responded playfully, turning over onto his side to gather you into his arms. You pressed yourself into his chest with a happy sigh.

“Kiss me?” You asked softly, leaning your head back a little to meet his eyes. He didn’t say anything in response, and only lowered his head to press his lips to yours. His kiss was warm and passionate, but at the same time, soft. You would never be able to get over how they felt.

You responded by kissing back hungrily, groaning contentedly against his lips. Your thigh hooked over his hip to keep him close, and your hands slipped under the hem of his shirt to feel up his chest. At the sensation, he pulled away from the kiss in surprise.

“Something wrong?” You asked.

“U-uh, no, but….” He started nervously.

“C’mon Ray, it’s okay, you can tell me.”

“Is it alright if I don’t want to have sex tonight?”

You met his eyes with concern. “Sure, but- did I do something? You can tell me if something’s up.”

“N-no, nothing’s wrong… Today was perfect. I just… I wanna hold you. I just wanna stay like this, and kiss you, and fall asleep like this.” As he spoke, his hand drifted down your back, his fingers ghosting over the fabric of your pajamas. “Is that okay?”

“Of course it is, Ray. Besides…” you pressed your lips against his cheek softly. “Cuddling doesn’t sound too bad.”

He only met your eyes for a moment longer before leaning in to kiss you again. He moved his lips against yours slowly, gently. As you kissed back, you settled against him, gently pressed into his chest, and letting him throw his arm over your waist.

Eventually, you both had to part for air, so you pulled away, softly gasping for breath. You nudged your cheek against his, breathing against his ear. “I love you, Ray,” you sighed.

Instantly, he breathed back, “I love you too. I’m so glad I get to spend my life with you.”

“I’m happy too,” you answered.

He squeezed you to his chest weakly. “The whole day, I kept wondering if I was dreaming.” he continued drowsily.

You giggled softly. Clearly the soft pillows and warmth of your body, coupled with the long, exhausting day, were getting to him. “That’s so corny,” you answered, reaching up to brush your fingers through his hair.

“I mean it, I couldn’t believe I got to marry you. Felt like a dream,” he continued, his grip on you softening.

“Well, I promise it’s real,” you purred to him.

“I love you,” he slurred back.

“I love you too.”

He only made a little "Mmm," sound in response.

You lifted your head to kiss his cheek. “Go to sleep,” you said quietly. “We’ll make a great breakfast together in the morning.” This time, he didn’t answer. You giggled to yourself again.

“Love you, Ray.”

#ghostbusters #ghostbusters 1984 #ghostbusters ii #ray stantz #raymond stantz #dan aykroyd #my shit

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my-multiversal-storage · 9 months ago

Text

Hollow Light Lore.

Hello once again!

before anything else i want to tell three things:

1.- Im making a story based on this au with the same name, but because i really want to tell pepole all the lore of this au and most of it won't be told on that story, iv'e decided that i would put it here.

2.- This is majorly for my au, but ive also had it in a bit mind for @void-and-light (if you are reading this, please tell me what you think of the lore :D)

Lastly, there might be some spoilers for the history, but I encourage you to read it throug!

In the beginning the Light and the Void worked together, none of them were above of the other, because existence needed them both to survive.

The Light would give life to beings and give them free will to express themselves with joy and happiness, and once their time came, the Void would embrace the beings as they passed on.

The beings feared the Void, but it didn’t care as it was with the Light who embraced it and understood it.

Millions of millennia passed, many came and many went on, the Light and Void were no exception to this…

As their time came the Light gave the beings the Guardian Spirits, representations of itself, the Void couldn’t do such thing as it wasn’t in its nature to give life, but to take it.

As both beings embraced each other in their final years, Void confessed to Light that it was scared, because without it, the void could go rampage if provoked and could cause irreparable damage to the living.

But the Light comforted it, and reassured such thing wouldn’t happen, because the beings understood the importance of life and death, and wouldn’t try to brake such balance, calming the Void.

And as the last year came, they finally confessed to each other, and they left being happy in their final moments, because they had each other.

----------

As decades came, so did Gods, one set of them were the dream goddess and the nightmare one, “siblings” that ruled over the essence realm.

The dream goddess was worshiped by the moth’s, and was some what close to the Spirits, as her light not only comforted them but other beings, and in the Spirit’s eyes, she reminded them of the Light.

She was pleased by this, seeing as many thoughts of her and many remembered her, the nightmare one didn’t really care for this, they just liked to enjoy his dances that they did from time to time…

But as decades left, so did some Gods, she was terrified by this terrified of the darkness that always came, everyone was, even the nightmare god, who was a bit more reckless than her, but she was terrified of it, terrified of dying, Terrified of Being FORGOTTEN.

The nightmare god, tried to calm her down, but in her fear and anger, she attacked the nightmare god, giving them a mortal wound and casting him out of the essence real, forcing them into a dance that would keep him alive unless they managed to get back to the full essence realm.

Also because of this, the dream goddess got more power, enough to be able to control the minds of beings, but she didn’t do that for now as she was praised enough to be able to live for thousands of years.

Because of her new-found power and also because there were no one to go against her, no one that could defy her will, NO ONE THAT WOULD FORGET HER, she declared herself to be on par with the Light, the goddess of gods.

She also gave herself a name, something that the mortals would refer her to, something that the nightmare fool also did, she would now be known as “THE RADIANCE”.

----------

Years passed, and The Radiance ruled with an iron fist, making sure that everyone respected her, there was no will that could outshine hers.

That was until the Wyrm came, a giant being that had the ability of foresight, a higher being just like her, but she didn’t pay attention to him as it looked like his life cycle had reached his end.

Unknown to her, the Wyrm’s life cycles of life and Rebirth were never ending, and so the Wyrm shed his shell and transformed into a smaller being to blend in with the others.

There he found out how The Radiance wouldn’t let anyone question her, stripping everyone of their free will, of their sapience, making her word be the first and the final.

He took pity on them, but also saw an opportunity to guide them under his light in a kingdom that in his foresight would last forever.

So, he began to work, first he expanded their minds, giving them sapience and the free will they had lost under The Radiance, slowly but surely, she began to lose her followers.

Until, she was almost forgotten, only remembered by very few and close to death.

Then, once the Wyrm was sure that The Radiance wouldn’t be a problem anymore, he started to plan his Kingdome that he foresaw.

There were complications, that was known, some were uneasy of the idea, others out right detested being ruled by another due to what happened with the radiance.

But he reassured them, they would still be able to rule on their own, it just meant that he was the major ruler, and be known as the king of the land of Niwen, the king of Hallownest.

He talked, he convinced, he made offers, to bugs, to the mantis, to the bees, to the spiders, to the moki, the kii, the owls, the gorlek, the mushroom, the snails, the mosskin, the moths, and the Spirits.

Little by little, his kingdom was taking shape, his vision was coming true, until finally he had done it.

A kingdom that was at peace, under his rule, were everyone respected him, and some saw him as a god to them, he was respected, he found love at the hands of the White Lady, and he would be remembered as “The Pale King”.

He had done it, and his kingdom would last forever… or… it should have lasted forever…

----------

Many forgot about The Radiance, but she wasn’t truly forgotten, and she was enraged beyond belief.

She was angry at herself for not seeing it sooner, angry at the beings that had forgotten her, but above all else, she was FURIOUSE at The Pale King, for he was the one that had made everyone do so.

And in her anger, she began plotting, “They want to forget about me and leave me to rot? Fine! Let’s remind them why I can’t be forgotten”.

The habitants of niwen began to have head aches and strange dreams about Her, soon the dreams began to break their minds turning them into slaves once again of The Radiance as they oozed a sickling orange.

The ones that were unaffected to this were the subjects of The Pale King, the Spirits, the White lady, and The Pale King himself.

While the Spirits tried to keep the situation under control, The Pale King tried anything he could to put an end to the infection, but all he tried, always ended in the same result.

What… what could he do? Everything he tried was completely useless against her, his hopes were diminishing by the minute, his kingdom that was supposed to last forever was crumbling, he was going to be forgotten because of HER! what could he do, What Could He Do, WHAT COULD HE-!

… An idea came into his head, he remembered something he came across at the beginnings of his kingdom.

A black substance, but not any kind, it was… void.

The mere existence of this substance was completely opposite of the Spirits, while they were full of life and some of them shared their light even in death by becoming Ancestral trees, the void was completely lifeless, even compared so something as the natural elements.

But thanks to that he got an idea… what if they made beings out of void? With no mind to think, no will to break, no voice to cry suffering, able to seal The Radiance inside itself, forever.

For any other, this would be a fool’s idea, because in a sense, he would be making something completely unnatural. Giving life to something lifeless? It would go against nature as a whole.

But, what other option did he have? If he didn’t do this, his people, his kingdom would fall, without anyone to remember it, and he HATED that idea.

And so, he began to work in secret, no one could find out what he was doing, MUCH less the Spirits, because they more than anyone else knew that what he was doing, was against nature itself, so he kept it to himself.

At first, he tried to only use void and soul, a life energy that everyone had but only the snails and higher beings could master and use to their will.

But they seemed inefficient to contain The Radiance itself inside of them, but if they were born of god and void, then it could work.

But he would have to do something he himself deemed punishable by death, he had to sacrifice his children to the void so he could have the perfect vessel.

He told the White lady about her plan, and she was disgusted by the mere idea of this, but somehow the king convinced her that this was the only method to save Hallownest, so even if a bit against her will he began to work.

1, 10, 100’s, 1000’s, 1000000’s, 1000000000000’s of vessels, try after try after try, failure after failure after failure after failure, none of them were hollow, they always had some emotion that would make them failures, over and over and over and over and over.

Until… he had finally done it, he had created a pure vessel without any kind of emotion, he was truly pure, for he was “The Hollow Knight”.

He then began training it, so it could finish The Radiance once and for all, he got the Great Nailsage sly to teach him all there were to know in the nail arts, he made some of the greatest gorlek prepare its nail ,he made it go trough the path of pain millions of times, modifying it to be as agile as a Spirit if not more, he even taught him to use soul as another way to attack if needed.

As this happened, he knew he would have to seal The Hollow Knight somewhere so nothing could interfere in its endeavors.

So, he had to choose three beings that shall enter an eternal sleep to keep the seal where The Hollow Knight would be sealed, the first one was Monmon the teacher a chief researcher and teacher of Hallownest; the second would be Lurien the watcher, the one who watched over the city of tears, who had offered himself out of loyalty for the king.

Lastly, he intended Herrah the beast to be the last dreamer, after a lot of back and forth, it was concluded that she would become a dreamer, only if she got an heir with him, and so Hornet was born.

She was one of the only things that brought a light at the end of the tunnel to everyone, her innocence was a much-needed rest to everything else that was happening, and even The Pale King traded her as his heir…

But the more he thought Hornet as his child, the more he saw The Hollow Knight as HIS child and not only as the weapon to end The Radiance, but he had to convince himself that it was just the mean to the end.

----------

But there was something that The Pale King didn’t consider while creating The Hollow Knight, while he knew that what he did was against nature, what he didn’t consider was that the void would retaliate.

For every unnatural life that was made, the void wanted back, so it created something on par with The Radiance’s infection, it was a fungus like thing that could overtake creatures and turn them into stone.

The Spirits being the first to encounter this called it “Decay”, when they addressed it to The Pale King, but it seemed that the Spirits light could out right dispose of it, but that wouldn’t be the last problem that the void gave to the kingdom.

Far away in the silent woods the decay took many lives at random for it nor the void had someone to command it, that was until Shriek was born.

Due to the conditions of her birthing, she was born with extreme deformities, one of those being having a layer of stone over her body, afraid and alone she searched for any comfort she could get, but everywhere she looked, she was rejected by everyone, but the one that hurt her the most, was the rejection of her own kind towards her, so she just flew back to the silent woods.

Once she got back, she cried, cried because of what she couldn’t have, cried over the rejection of her own kind, cried because she would only be remembered as a monster, even if she was just a child.

But amongst her sadness, only one thing comforted her, the decay, because to it, she was the only one that could guide it, the only one that could control it, and she saw this, as she saw that the only other thing that was comforting her was also regarded as something dangerous.

She thought of The Radiance, she started to think that she was also wronged without reason, just like she was, and se set up her mind, if she couldn’t be remembered as a friend, as a kid, if they could only see a monster, then she would give them a reason to remember her as a monster, as “Shriek”.

----------

Things were getting worse and worse by the minute for the kingdom, the infection and the decay were getting more and more ground as time went on, but The Pale King had hope in The Hollow Knight, hope that not only would he be able to finish The Radiance, but also Shriek, but it would need to train harder for that to happen.

Unknown even for him, he started to treat The Hollow Knight more and more as a son than a weapon, even the White Lady knew this but she didn’t tell him in fear of having to lose another child.

Time passed and The Hollow Knight was ready, along side him there was a Spirit named Willow, she had been informed of the plan they had, of course she disapproved of it, but it was already near finished, so the only thing she could do at the time was to also train it for the upcoming battle that was going to happen on its mind.

After a long battle against the decay and the infected that had cost thousands of lives, they had finally caught the attention of The Radiance and Shriek, and proceeded to seal them both in The Hollow Knight, and sealing him in the Temple of the Black Egg with the help of the dreamers.

They had done it! They had won over The Radiance and Shriek! But… it wasn’t over, the decay still remained, once again without something to control it, but Willow had already foreseen this, so in an act of self-sacrifice, she donned her life to become something greater than a Ancestral tree, she had become a Spirit tree on top of the Temple of the Black Egg, a tree that emitted enough light to dispel the decay, but she knew that the decay wouldn’t only attack there, it would also go for other places, so many Spirits waved their goodbyes to Hallownes and Niwen, and left to fulfil their new purpose.

----------

Time passed and The Pale King was celebrated by everyone for his accomplishment of being able to defeat The Radiance and Shriek, he only said that it was the least he could do for his people.

But, whenever he was alone, whenever he was sure that there was no one else? He was near breaking point, questioning himself if he had truly done the right thing, if the many lost lives of his children were okay, if somewhat damming another species to have supposedly premature deaths in order to keep the balance of nature was justified. Was there truly no cost too great?

Time and time again, he questioned himself over and over, slowly but surely losing his sense of self…

Until the last nail in the king’s coffin was placed by the king himself.

The Pale King used his foresight to reassure himself that what he did was the correct choice, that thanks to him the kingdom would live eternally, but what he saw, was everything he didn’t want to see.

He saw the kingdom that he had sacrificed everything for, crumbling down, the people screamed in fear and agony as the decay and the infection grew more and more, The Radiance and Shriek destroying everything he had done without anyone to stop them.

That was the last time he used his foresight at all, he now knew that everything he had done, every promise he made, Every Sacrifice HE made, was all in vain.

So, he disappeared without a trace, everyone wondered where he had gone, but no one was ever able to find him, for he didn’t want to found, because he feared that he wouldn’t be remembered as a king, but as a fool that destroyed everything.

----------

Decades passed, many Spirits transformed into Spirit trees to keep the Decay at bay, it had been considered an honor to them to transform into such beautiful trees full of life that gave birth to even more Spirits.

But in Hallownest things were getting worse without anyone knowing, The Hollow Knight began to fall under The Radiance and Shriek, and the Spirit tree Willow started to die, leaving way for the Infection and the Decay, killing all the Spirits that were supposed to heir his will, and without any other Vessel, The Radiance and Shriek would come out of The Hollow Knight, leading an era of inbalance.

It seemed like it would be the end of everything… but amongst everyone a prophesy arose.

“When the kingdom comes to its final hour, when the tree’s life comes to an end and the vessel were about to break. Two heroes would come to save them all, a Spirit that calmed the darkness and a vessel once lost but that has found its way thanks to the light. Together, the both of them would give new light to Niwen and defeat The Radiance and Shriek once and for all. For they got each other, No Matter What.”

One of the few that believed the prophesy was Hornet that had fully grown to be the queen of the spiders, but after the prophesy, she sought out the ones that the prophesy spoke of, but to no avail.

When she returned, she vowed to test the both of them to see if they truly the ones that the prophesy spoke of, if they were, they would survive her test, if they weren’t, then she would have to wait for the right ones.

----------

Far, far away from Hallownes, from Niwen, a Spirit named Ori met a Vessel without a name but had named himself as Ghost, together they saved the lands of Nibel, restoring the light of the Spirit tree, they were able to calm the Owl named Kuro and save her las last child named Ku, and they brought back the mother they had lost to the decay named Naru.

Sadly, for Ku, her right wing las left without many feathers, leaving her unable to fly as a result, but thanks to thanks to a feather that they got from her mother, Ori and Ghost helped her gain the ability to do so, and in their excitement, Ori and Ghost got on to Ku’s back and flied.

They passed over many places and intended to get back, but a storm blew off the wing that Ku used to fly, as well as separating Ori and Ghost from Ku.

They landed in a place they didn’t know, but they would find out that, what they had to get over on the land of Nibel, would be considered child’s play on this land.

would they be able to save this land? or will they succumb to the Decay and the Infection?

____________________

Hope you enjoyed it :)

#ghost x ori #hollow knight #ori and the will of the wisps #hk ghost #ori #hk pale king #hk radiance #shriek #spirits #hk pure vessel #hk hornet #hollow light

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loveinequinox · 2 years ago

Text

PART III

Part I

Part II

twilight fic; edward x f!reader

{{As said before in this fic Edward is a sadistic vamp with abandonment issues. He’s forgotten pretty much all of his gentlemanly qualities which he MAY redeem again, who knows. He’s pushy, scary and of course has his usual vampire charm.}}

!!TW!! \\ Edward pushes himself of reader, (kisses, touching, pinning against a tree)

You were walking as quickly as possible back towards your grandfathers home. That psychopath could be anywhere, if he was here once surely he could return. Throwing uneasy glances towards the tree lines, you felt your heart skip a beat. What could he possibly be doing lurking around your home? This freak had to have some sort of issues. You’d make sure to put him back in his place next time you saw him.

You opened the cracked white door, closing it gently behind you. Grandpa was sitting in at the kitchen table, a mug of coffee in his hand. “Welcome home dear, how was school?”

“Fine Grandpa, went about as good as any first day.” Lie. Lie. Semi-truth?

“Oh? Want to talk about it?”

“No Im fine really, just tired. If you need anything give me a shout.” With a disheveled sandwich you slapped together in seconds in your hand you made your way upstairs. Old oak floor boards freaking beneath each step. Your room was small, but quaint. It was extremely colourful, you hated to have something be boring and drab. Modern greys and whites had no soul, no feeling, no vibrancy! You needed excitement and enrichment in your place of living.

After shedding the clothes you wore to school and donning a much more comfortable sweatpants and shirt, you nested witching your blankets with a good book. Ready and prepared to forget the world for a few hours, and Edward.

As the book began to reach its climax with the hero finally attempting to save the day, something knocked on your window. You stared at it for a few moments, waiting for something else. A pebble knocked harmlessly off of the pain. Who was throwing pebbles at your window? You got up, a sudden wave of cold air hitting you as you peered at the bedroom window. There, standing in the opening beside Charlie Swans house and behind yours was Edward. You didn’t waste a second grabbing a pullover, slipping into shoes and rushing down the steps and out the door. Grandpa was fast asleep on the couch so hopefully he wouldn’t hear the obscenities about to escape your mouth.

“I don’t know who the fuck you think you are-“ You marched up in front of the greek god, “but you need to stay the hell away from me.” This right now went against everything your family warned you about. Everything that happened to your grandmother, all the warnings and cautions were flaring up wishing your head. But right now you saw red, perhaps it was for her untimely end too. “You don’t know me, we have never spoken and you certainly don’t get to prance around my house like a fucking jolly rancher!” He chuckled a bit at that, a smile tugging at his lips.

“Come on now, aren’t you happy to see me?” Once again he let your name drip from his mouth like liquid honey. You felt a shiver run up your spine. “I’ve been waiting to get a chance to talk to you.” Just as you were about to continue screaming at him he shushed your with his index finger, “I know your mad and Id rather not be called that particular slur you were just readying to say.”

“How in the hell do you have any idea what I was about to say?” You tapped your foot impatiently, angrily trying to contain your temper in some menial medium. Edward chuckled, spinning on his heel and striding towards the woods. The tree line seemed ready to swallow him up, like it was welcoming him home. “Hey bitch get back here! You can’t just walk away like some entitled prince!” You ran after him, catching up to a suspiciously fast pace he was continuing. You followed him deep into the forest, continuously screaming at him to stay away from you, not annoy you etc. Which was ironic, since that was what you were doing to him.

He vanished from your line of sight when you looked down to step over a root of a tree. You couldn’t spot him anywhere. The suns beams flared through the canopy overhead, towering ancient trees guarded these woods day and night. Bark housing the sweet sticky sap and a multitude of insects hums with life. You breathed in the musky smell of moss and undergrowth. You felt at peace for a moment, anger leaving you, before something crashed into you pinning you against a trunk of a tree. The wind was knocked out of your lungs, leaving you gasping and scrambling for air. That familiar cologne invaded your senses, but the body was rock solid and cold as ice. Edward?

“You talk too much, you know that?” He pressed his nose to your neck, leading a trail up and to your jaw. He inhaled deeply, sighing after as if reached ecstasy. You worked your arms up to his chest, attempting to push him away. You forced all your strength into your arms, and yet, he did not budge. “Shhhh…” He ran a hand along your thigh, landing soft kisses beneath your jaw. “I just need to feel you. You look so irresistible and smell like it too.” Black, bottomless eyes met yours as he looked up from your neck and place a gentle peck on your lips. He licked them quickly, letting loose a small chuckle. “You taste even better, a gift that keeps giving!” You could feel your knees getting weak and your stomach churning. What the fuck was he doing? Did he really just push himself on you like this? The audacity of this… this… creature! He explored your neck, your cheek and your thighs. His hands worked around the circumference of your leg, cupping the thigh just beneath your ass. He squeezed it, letting loose a low, rumbling sigh. With his other hand he came up and pulled the collar of your shirt to the side, kissing your collarbone and sucking at the skin. You were breathing heavily now, feeling you had been dosed up with some sort of aphrodisiac. He eventually let go of your neck, a smack noise sounding as he gave one final suck to your skin. He grinned at you, gleaming white teeth shining. You couldn’t speak.

He kissed your forehead. “Same time tomorrow darling.” He took a step back, releasing you and vanishing with only the disturbed leaves and undergrowth and the growing hickey on your neck as evidence he was ever there.

#edward cullen x reader #edward cullen x y/n #edward cullen #twilight #twilight fanfiction #twilight x reader #edward x reader

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dragon-queen21 · 7 months ago

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thank for you for reply, apologies for sendin again, can you tell im hyperfixating?

i dont know if you exactly think of her like this but, HUGE hc that robins a flip. listen HEAR ME OUT PLEASE, “mama robin” and “baby bird” nicknames the crew bestowed upon her

i have so many hc for her in a agere situation, shes definitely a kid who has her good and bad days, sometimes she just wants to- needs to be alone because of trauma, and other days shes with them, shes a quiet little lady, but shes there just happy in the crews presence and reading. or maybe shes trying to break out of her shell and try to play a game with chopper, nami, or maybe on a really good day: sanji too. (usopp & luffy, she loves them, theyre just a bit too overwhelming together when shes little.)

i feel like it took her awhile to tell the crew about it, shes always been secretive, shes always had to be. but she realizes; “these are my nakama, they wouldnt hurt me” and just ups and tells them all randomly at dinner in a usual robin fashion

i cant imagine how that conversation would go but shed just all off a suddenly randomly drop that fact about her and everyones like “????”

and for cg robin well,

she would definitely read them stories no doubt about that. shes crack open a book, set her baby on her lap, their head on her shoulder and gently read them a fable or short story until they fall asleep.

or minor hc that when sanjis is like really little and robin has to cook the crew their dinner that night, she’ll set sanji up by her feet while she cooks so she can get things done, and sanji doesnt get upset because hes all alone :( (hes also in his kitchen which makes him happy as can be!)

^ or when hes on the bigger side robin will let him help her cook.

“Sanji, honey, can you pass me the oregano?”

“ACK! Robin ew no!!”

“oh dear! what should i use then?”

“um… ‘dis one!”

im done for mow i promise! i dont wanna chew your ear off but i hope you enjoy! thank you<33

📷

My dear anon I will take all of the ramblings always there is no need for apologies! >:3

Considering how much I have been posting about my current brain rot with demon slayer I get you 100% with the hyperfixations. If you want to send more in I would love to hear and add to them, your messages have made me super happy and have given me a lot to think over /pos Making me want to get back into writing a one piece fic. I need to make more with the babies!

Oh my gosh you’re so right. She would just randomly over dinner tell everyone about her regressing.

I can imagine someone like Usopp or Sanji that took forever to tell the crew and had so much mental prepping and making sure everything was perfect just to see her just out of the blue would probably be so shocking to them.

Letting Sanji be with her in the kitchen, that’s such a cute idea you have no clue how much I love that. I have such a soft spot for Robin and him truly. Probably my favorite little caregiver duo if I am being honest.

Okay but she would also be so good at playing pretend with him. Opening a pretend restaurant with a bunch of stuffed animals as customers, making orders for the little one to fill out and stuff. Ooh or if they are both small playing school

Also, idea, lil Robin, going up to her crewmates with a book in hand and just holding it out to them without saying anything. She wants someone to read to her and is too shy to ask.

Sanji and Nami would without doubt. Luffy would probably get bored half way or reading the actual words and start going off of the pictures and making up his own story. Zoro who is absolutely clueless at first and ends up rejecting her just because he doesn’t understand. Franky would do the best voices. Jinbei the best at picking really good bedtime stories and reading them.

#mayliz rambles #one piece agere #fandom agere #age regression #sfw agere #anime agere #age regression headcanons #agere headcanons #📷 anon

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xx-psych0-rabbit-xx · 5 months ago

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how do u see zan interacting with susie, magolor and marx

OH THIS IS FUNNN

first of all all instances we have of zan interacting w ppl consist of her insulting them (i think her form of insulting is so funny btw.she fully acknowledges others skills but seems all competitive abt it at the end n most of her nicknames arent even related to her competitive sore loser-ness.she just hates ppl anyways.why is she like this.) so im p sure she has the social skills of moldy cardboard

susie:i think zan would find her.the most tolerable? i mostly picture the mages interacting w wave 3, n she finds taranza (keeps trying to relate to her n his overly open emotional bonding is making her uncomfortable) n magolor (have had beef since childhood w each other)(more on that up ahead!) to be extremely obnoxious while susie doesnt comment on anything regarding her or tries being annoying on purpose, but ultimately zan sees susie as just "okay" bc she much prefers talking to her sisters, susie on the other hand has some.kinda lesbian fueled fascination? w her? she thinks she seems cool but pitiful but mean but naive but insane, faraway observation kinda crush, most of her attempts to make any moves completely fail bc zan doesnt understand anything shes trying to get at, i imagine the longer this goes on the worse susie is doing, ironically the more desperate she gets to get zan to get a hint the more calm zan gets around her bc as far as shes seeing things susie likes talking to her lol

tl dr susie rly wants this to be some epic yuri, zan thinks theyre acquaintances n that susie just has a tendency to say weird things like shes expecting a reply sometimes.if this yuri was successful theyd be that one image like "hi me n my girlfriend saw you from the other side of the club! n we like fucking HATE your vibe."

magolor:theres this one nifty theory magolor spent some amount of time at the jamba cult in the past, its a theory i borrow from my bestie n its been a while since shes explained it fresh to me, so if anyones interested i can always waterboard it until she explains it to me again so i can share it lol.anyways maggie spent some time as some kinda fourth sibling to the mages, i think zan liked him back then, shes a natural at being an older sister figure n she cherishes hyness n her sisters a lot in canon (only ppl shes affectionate towards n shes v expressive abt it), so she treated magolor similarly, till he either escaped or got the boot from hyness (i personally picture he was just obnoxiously curious? over questioning is a big deal in religion.so rly either realized this was a cult or hyness got tired of him), whereas shed just.grow to absolutely despise him bc thats betrayal of faith n betrayal of them to her, hyness wouldnt be happy w magolor specially n zan would see his word as the holy law, magolor seems to dislike the mages as well in a couple tweets, so i feel he also grew to dislike them, so they just.hate each other now they met again lol.magolor thinks pissing her off on purpose is hilarious n zan rly rly RLY wants to maim him.but kirby said they need to be friends so wtv.

tl dr zan thinks hes a heretic false believer guilty of blasphemy n apostasy, magolor thinks shes an annoying blind suck up to a stupid cult religion

marx:she has no.interest in him lol.she thinks hes a little funny at times (mostly when nobody else thinks its funny) (she also thinks puns r funny but dont tell anyone she said that) but mostly looks like pointless trouble also hes friends w magolor so thats 50 negative points immediately by association.

#mail #i hope these all made sense usual disclaimer i have issues w wording so i hope these made sense !#ily zanny wanny.#headcanons.txt

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lostmyremembrall · 2 years ago

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ohh and also from the same anon who's esfp and in hufflepuff, a missing thing i forgot to include — although im an active person who loves activities, im not competitive and sometimes is scared of competitive people 🥹 yes i'll try my hardest to win but what matters is im having fun 👍🏻

🐍 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐇𝐂 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐓𝐨𝐦

A/N: I am so sorry this took so long to reply to! Tumblr somehow deleted the draft that I was ready to publish. I'm relieved I still remember most of what I've written in the previous one, but I'm sorry if I miss anything.

𝐶𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝐽𝑜𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 1𝐾 𝐸𝑣𝑒𝑛𝑡! Now closed

You met Tom through being paired for a Charms project.

The first impression that left Tom's lips after you left, was "Well she's just a ball of sunshine, isn't she."

If he’s being completely honest, he was jealous of you first.

Smile and friendliness came easy to you, compared to him.

Tom felt like you just had it easier than him. A life handed to you on a silver platter. That’s why you’re able to find reasons to smile. To be kind to others.

But, Tom found it easy to work with you, really that came as no surprise. So the project moved smoothly.

One night, you joined him in the library, feeling especially rotten.

This boy had been name-calling and harassing you. And it didn’t help that others expected you to still keep smiling, as if you aren’t allowed to be anything but happy.

You bit down on your lips, and the tears began rolling down your cheeks involuntarily.

Tom was taken aback, not having expected that you were able to shed a tear.

Tom knew that feeling. To feel like you have to pretend you were okay, even when the world was cruel to you.

Tom bit his lips, his eyes guiltily flickering between you and his own book, unsure how to respond. He wasn’t even sure if he was allowed to look at you cry.

You let out a restrained sob, still trying to focus on the project at hand in the quiet hours of the library.

Tom couldn’t bare it anymore.

“Come with me,” he mumbled out of nowhere, taking your hand.

“Huh?”

Confused, you still followed him. A long walk up the stairs to the Astronomy tower.

Tom had no idea what he was doing. He had no clue whether this was the proper way to ‘fix’ you. But, he knew this place helped Tom.

It was the Astronomy Tower.

Chilly, but the quiet stars shimmering above you.

“You can cry to your heart’s content here. Hell, you could even curse and shout and nobody would come to disturb you.”

“I’ll be guarding at the stairs so nobody would come disturb.”

Tom pulled his lips into a strained smile before leaving.

He paused before descending however, having second thoughts.

He came back to you again to wrap his Slytherin scarf snugly around you.

Then, he disappeared behind the stairs.

Tom sat at the bottom of the stairs, well out of earshot.

It was a revelation: that you could get sad.

A lesson well learned, that at the end of the day, nobody knew what was happening in others’ lives. That Tom shouldn’t sulk in bitterness that everyone else had it easier.

Tom noticed how much he missed seeing you smile.

It never occurred to him that your smile and your friendly conversations had become an escape for him, from his nightmarish life.

“Tom?”

He jumped, dropping the wand that he was playing with.

“Thank you,” You joined him on the stairs.

It was strange, to be comforted by Tom Riddle, out of all people.

A simple ‘your welcome’ would have sufficed. But, Tom found himself murmuring, “Don’t particularly enjoy watching you cry.”

Your eyes widened, caught off guard by the forward sentiment.

“Nobody seems to,” you murmured bitterly.

Tom hummed, the conversation breaching an intriguing topic of human empathy: Nobody really enjoyed seeing others sad. Did they?

“Doesn’t mean you should care,” Tom blurted out. “Cry, cuss, scream all you want. Get depressed. Get angry. We’re only humans.”

You hummed, your shoulders relaxing at the idea that at least someone was accepting of all your raw emotions.

You felt the soft cotton of his scarf against your cheeks. It smelled like him: like pines and old books.

“Actually, you’ve come to the right person,” Tom smirked at his own joke. “There’s no other house than Slytherin that does ‘get depressed and angry’ better.”

A chuckle escaped your lips.

Tom’s eyes turned and found yours, his lips breaking into a smile as well at the sight of you laughing.

It felt special. This moment they shared in the dead of the night, just laughing at a joke that wasn’t even supposed to be that funny.

Tom blinked slowly at the sight of you, the laughter eventually dying on your lips, realising he enjoyed seeing you smile.

When he blurted out the question, it wasn’t ‘What happened?’ It was “Who was it?”

You waved your hand away. “Doesn’t matter anymore.”

Not wanting to press you when you’ve already had a rough night, Tom only nodded.

Needless to say, Tom was quick to find out the culprit

He had gone on to take a mysterious leave of absence

Ever since then, he has become your unofficial bodyguard/boyfriend

Gets VERY possessive and protective of you

Wants all of your sunshine (your smile, kindness, attention) for himself

But, he reluctantly shares

Prefers to have his arm wrapped around you to show who exactly they’ll be messing with if anyone dares to hurt you

Sometimes, you hear the whispers “Does she actually enjoy spending time with him?” “How the hell do they get on together.”

But they’re usually quick to be silenced by Tom’s glare.

You and Tom are perfect for each other.

You eventually found that Tom feels emotions quite strongly. He's just good at hiding them, and pretending that he's all logic and reason.

It helps Tom that you are innately good at reading people's emotions, able to offer your presence and advice and cater to what Tom needs the most at the moment.

You eventually opened up about feeling like not being able to talk to anyone. Your family or your friends.

Every time you needed to feel your negative emotions, he'd wrap his arms around you. Resting his head on top of yours.

"Embrace it, Y/N. No use pretending it's not there," he would talk about your negative emotions, whatever they may be.

He reassures you that, at least in front of him, you are able to feel whatever you'd like, however much you'd like.

He would spend hours, however long you need, just cradling you like that.

He would finally pull away when he starts to hear your breathing even out.

He thumbs away your tears, and smiles when he finally begins to see a hint of smile return to your face.

Tom is quick to intuit that your love language is words of affirmation.

He begins to do more than reassurance for when you're feeling upset.

He would randomly kiss your hand, peck your cheeks, or press his lips to yours during the day - when you pass by him in the corridors, in the Great Hall, the library.

"Radiant as ever, my love."

He smirks, knowing the effect this has on you.

Once he admits it, he doesn't shy away from telling you how much you mean to him. How much he adores you. How much he admires you for your intellect, strength, and courage.

Since there is intellect, strength, and courage required in allowing yourself to feel emotions.

"I'd do anything to keep you happy," he murmurs one day out of nowhere, brushing a lazy finger down your cheek.

"I'd kill for you. I'd break the world hundred times over if it means I get to see you smile."

Tom is a bit intense, you find.

But, a sweet sentiment nonetheless.

Your typical date would be: a trip to Hogsmeade

You introduce Tom to all the delights of the world

Tom rolls his eyes and reluctantly lets you lead his hand

But, you both know he secretly enjoys it

First. Anything that you find delightful, Tom wants to know all about it.

Second. Your laughter and excited giggle are music to his ears.

Third, he admittedly enjoys the process of finding small pleasures in life. To see life from your perspective.

Another reason to smile.

On top of getting to spend time with you.

That includes Honeydukes, Zonko’s, Butterbeer

He loves watching you smile with a foam of butterbeer on your lips

Seems very appropriate to him: A laughter, the warm fireplace, the sweet golden butterbeer that is literally sunshine in a bottle, and you. They all represent something perfect. A little ball of sunshine that he found and will never dare let go of.

These dates would typically end with him, leaning into you out of nowhere with a smitten smirk.

He holds your chin, and kisses your butterbeer foam away.

#1k celebration #1k event #1k milestone #1k followers #1K follower event #harry potter #1k follower celebration #tom riddle #tom riddle jr #tom marvolo riddle #tom riddle fanfiction #tmr #tom riddle fanfic #harry potter fanfiction #tom riddle fic #tom riddle x you #tom riddle x reader

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perceivedregret · 2 years ago

Text

no more pain, except im lying

pt 4 of so it goes. i'm happy to say i've been consumed. rip my other wips tbh /: you can start from the beginning on my ao3 if you'd like. for now, here's pt4

Steve was thankful when he didn’t actually die the first time.

Now he kind of wishes he would have stayed dead.

He looks around, sees the way they’re all surrounded. Hopper stands by the cabin’s door as they all get meticulously taken down by the Suits one by one, their weaknesses being used in full force against them. Steve musters up what little bit of energy he has left and begs for Dustin and Max to run. Those brats have been through enough, they don’t need to see this happen to the three of them, not again.

Everything goes dark as he feels himself burn up from the inside, the injection coursing its way through his body until he can’t do anything but let it completely take him under.

—-----

"Come on! Stop worrying and just think about how cool this is going to be on the way over. Guys, back me up."

Dustin jingles the keys to Steve's car, holding it up near his face with a wide enough smile to make Steve's own face ache. The keys slip from his grasp and Steve instinctively reaches out to catch them, moving so quickly he disrupts the still air.

"Holy shit," Lucas, Will, and Mike gasp, eyes and mouths hanging open comically wide. Steve tries to limit his abilities, always trying to maintain a semblance of normality to their lives as often as he can, so to catch him slipping up is its own surprise.

"Watch it," he mutters, quick glance at the keys to make sure he didn't accidently bend them. "Last time you dropped these I ended up without a house key and had to climb in through the window."

Dustin's smile somehow gets wider as the back of his hands slap the arms of those closest. "I'm never gonna get used to that, holy shit. But whatever, think about it!" He's already shouldering his backpack and heading towards the door that leads to the garage, doesn't bother to look back to make sure the rest are following. "When has anyone ever had the opportunity to take a picture with their own headstone!”

“God, Henderson, I’d hope not ever. Why are you so fucking geeked about this, you twerp. Shouldn’t you be in like, mourning, or something.” He doesn't know why he's following him because he really shouldn't be entertaining this idea. Hopper would probably end up actually killing him if they got caught since he declared him dead a little over three weeks ago, and he doesn't think the guy would be all that opposed to making it happen this time.

“That's the awesomeness of this because you're not really dead. We did all our crying and grieving when we thought you died the first time when Heather snapped your neck. But then you woke up! You die-but-not-really-die a second time and it kinda loses its effect. Except with death number two you now have a headstone! You’re like Han, except less frozen in carbonite and just frozen at nineteen forever.”

Mike scoffs behind them. "I didn't cry, did you cry?" He stage whispers. Steve rolls his eyes.

"I don't know." Will shrugs, fingers fidgeting with the buttons and knobs on Jonathan's camera that hangs over his shoulders. "I mean, I shed a tear. I think."

"Oh, fuck off," Dustin mutters, beelining straight for the passenger side.

When they get to Steve's car and are face to face from opposite ends of their respective doors, Dustin smiles so genuinely that Steve can’t bring himself to be the buzzkill. If he's honest with himself the idea does sound kinda cool, but he can’t let Dustin know that. Undead superhuman vampire or not, he needs to work on toning down this kid's damn ego.

“Han huh… that’s the cool dude who’s best friends with bigfoot and has the really fast spaceship, right?”

Dustin’s smile immediately drops, the other three bemoaning as they slip into the back seat.

“He did not just call Han Solo the cool dude with the fast spaceship," Lucas groans, slipping in behind the driver's side.

“Bigfoot? Bigfoot?!” Mike sputters, exasperated.

Dustin’s head drops, chin dropping to his chest so fast Steve can hear his neck crack. His head snaps back up, hands coming up as he taps his pointer fingers together. “First off– Han Solo is one of the greatest leaders of the Rebel Alliance. He helped fight for the freedom of the entire galaxy against the Galactic Empire. Okay, that man is a hero, a bad ass… The best smuggler!”

Steve tilts his head, corners of his mouth downturning as he considers the compliment.

“Oh!” Dustin snaps his fingers before his hand slaps the roof of the car. “He gets the girl!”

Steve’s eyes slip shut at the start of Mike cackling in the back seat. “So... he’s not like Han.”

—--

there's more to this part, catch the rest on my ao3

#steddie fic #< tagging just in case #stranger things fic #steve harrington #robin buckley #nancy wheeler #max mayfield #the party #dustin henderson #vampire!steve #werewolf!nancy #witch!robin #werewolf!max #stranger things au #supernatural creatures au #fic continuation #so it goes #my*stuff

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puppy-phum · 2 years ago

Note

I tried to format this with a comma and a capital letter to show where a new line is in these songs/quotes bc tumblr hates formatting!

"Don't you ever, Tame your demons, But always keep them on a leash" - Arsonist's Lullabye, Hozier (maybe vegaspete or beyond evil?)

"And from these rooftops, I'll scream your name, Bravely to the dark" - Tyler Knott Gregson (rooftops always give me patpran vibes but anyone else if good too)

"How much should my longing fall like snow, Before the days of spring return, friend?, Snowflakes fall down, And fall apart little by little, I miss you, I miss you, I miss you" - Spring Day, BTS

Also basically any of Do I Wanna Know by the Arctic Monkeys gives me patpran vibes but idk if this is a basic choice? It could be overused but im not sure but anyway!! "I dreamt about you nearly every night this week, How many secrets can you keep?, 'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat, Until I fall asleep, Ever thought of calling when you've had a few? Because I always do, Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new."

Also I'm happy to take literally anything for The Eclipse (I feel like I really dont see many edits of it? But I feel like its difficult to pin down a specific vibe because it was so much grief but it is maybe my favourite right now!) or Between Us/Not Me/Bad Buddy/Vice Versa/Beyond Evil!

hello lizzie ^^ i hope you've been well!

this is for you!

i hope you like what i came up with even when i took some liberties with the prompt. you gave me so many options to choose from, so many good options, but ever since i first got this ask, i was fixated on that hozier line. it just seemed to fit beyond evil so perfectly and i was so excited to make something for that drama bc i never did back when i watched it. thank you so much for it! (and also special love for throwing spring day at me, it made me smile fondly ♥ maybe i'll end up using it when i find something fitting to use it for)

(more blabberings under the cut bc this edit made me think some thoughts!)

first of all, i have to admit that i have almost forgotten everything that happened in beyond evil. it's been over a year since i binged through it and it never stuck with me the same way as, let's say, the devil judge did. but i still found it super interesting and with this prompt, i came to think about the themes in it once more. i came to think about the story, and the world, and the people. most of all, the people.

bc, second of all, i am obsessed with the dynamic of our two main characters. they are like fire and ice, and they struggle to understand each other bc of it. joowon is young, righteous, hopeful, and naive. dongsik is older, has already seen the cruelty of the world, and knows how much it can hurt. but he has not given up, and instead, there is this plan and then –

well. joowon comes and messes it up. kind of. tho he also becomes dongsik's ally, and then comes to see how unfair the world can be, and watching all of this happen hurts dongsik who, until then, has not shied away from sacrifice. he has let the people around him be hurt. he has been selfish in that sense. and then this one person more threatens to tip him over.

so, i had thoughts. and then i somehow tried to put all of them into this edit: the differences between joowon and dongsik, their individual journeys, their joined moments. there's dongsik with his undying fire, the only thing left pushing him through as he loses, and loses, and loses again and again. there's joowon with his one goal: to serve justice. he's willing to try and reach this goal by any means necessary. he almost becomes blind to how impossible reaching it can be.

they both have their demons. dongsik's are vengeful, full of years-old rage. they're simmering somewhere behind his smiles and in his stern eyes and under the tears he so unwillingly sheds. he cannot tame them despite all the time that has passed. he doesn't want to.

and then there's joowon with his newly found demons, the ones that are out of his control, the ones that would like to drive a bullet into his father's chest or smash a golf club into his head. the demons that turn the calm and collected detective han into someone he didn't know he could be. the demons that are born out of his old and new grief.

the caption seemed to put all of this so nicely. it's one of dongsik's lines said to joowon. there's something scary about how far ppl are willing to go out of love and attachment. we're terrifying creatures once someone takes something we care about away from us.

i hope you didn't find my ramblings or the edit itself boring. i personally love the simplicity of it all. i haven't done anything black and white in a long while so this felt refreshing and fun.

thank you once more for your prompt and have a good weekend ♥

#thank you ♥#promptrambles #makeavish2023

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tearstoshed4ever · 11 months ago

Text

"Please, love. Calm yourself. Remember your vow....Things will get better in time." Widow said, trying to console her.

iv tried but al its gotten me is this

emily sniffled

getinering to her arm again

she wiped her tears on the hem of her mothers dress

todays is a very hard day for me

id be 19 today

but inseed im stuck at 18 forever

which in itself wouldnt be so bad

but on top of everthing esle i aslo miss my family

mommy

daddy

lydia

but i never see any of them anymore

im fucking sick of being dead

i want to be alive again

surly there must be some way

Jul 1, 2021 11:47 PM

to revrese this mistake

and let me go back home to my family

she turned back to maggot and widow

maggot was hurt and ready to cry at the of her leaving

widow was alos hurt but maily cause emily spoke like she didnt think they were a good enough family

oh maggot dont u start crying again

i just manged to stop

and widow dont look at me that way

if i hurt your feelings im sorry

u know i think of u as my family

and that i love both more then anything in the world

but i dont belong here

i belonge upstaires

and i think my vow was a mistake

i know i said i would wait as long as it takes but im tired of waiting

i dont want to be patent anymore

iv tried to be happy here but its not working

please tell me is there even the sightst chance i can live again

if so ill anything

Jul 2, 2021 4:47 AM

Maggot and widow looked at each other, trying to come up with an answer. "There's not a way we know dear, not until a human caused a fuss by raising his cousin from the tomb. But that was ages ago." Widow said sadly. "Elder goodnicht might know. But I doubt he would help," maggot suggested

(whars the raising the dead thing from

emilys black eyes lit up and she smiled for the fisrt time that day

"Oh, what a fantastic idea!

she squealed jumping up

ill go see him right now

maggot u stay here with widow

we dont need a repete of last year

(from what?)

(it was from the bible. Jesus raising Lazarus.)

"Gladly. Just make sure she doesn't go petting all those smelly old crows!" Maggot said back.

emily just rolled her eyes that was excaty why she told him to stay

ill be back later

and with that she left the ally

u know u just set her up for dissappment

widow said

shes gonna end up getting her poor little heart crushed

hey i was just trying to help

maggot protested

i know and thats very kind of u

and your one to talk widow your the one whos always trying to keep her hopes up

Jul 2, 2021 7:09 PM

"well somebody has to! Tge poor girl is devastated!" Widow snapped

why are u pissed at me what the hell did i do now

maggot snapped back

Jul 2, 2021 9:36 PM

"I'm not pissed I'm just...I'm afraid for Emily. I didn't mean to take it out on you, love. You're just so darn candid." Widow said

im scared for her to i thought she was over this bullshit

uptill today she seemed fine

no nightmares

no crying

she was eating and talking to people

she wasnt even crying in her sleep anmore

and id know if she was cause i live in her head now

but now shes right back where she stared from

she hasnt left her room all day

she looks like shit

she hasnt eaten

shes crying again

and now shes hurting herself

and wants to leave

i dont think shed even want us as parents

and i know u feel the same cause i saw the look on your face

Jul 2, 2021 11:35 PM

hi! I'm back😊) "We just have to keep trying, maggot. She's got to accept the reality of it all. We have to help her, even if she doesn't want our help. We can't let her become a lost soul, forever longing for life and trapped between two worlds." Widow said softly. Maggot was right. What Emily said, how she reacted had broken her heart. But she couldn't abandon Emily.

crawling over to the pillow she curled up and began to wepp softly

holy shit i havent seen u cry since the furnel last year

wiggling over to her

Jul 5, 2021 4:27 PM

his own hurt feelings resufecing

(Emily or widow is crying?)

widow

emily already left

(

"I can cry! I have feelings just like anyone else in this family!" Widow so bed

*sobbed

well at least tell me why

your crying

maggot asked hesently storking her head with his tail

he was used to emily crying but not widow

shed always been the strong put though one

Jul 5, 2021 6:46 PM

Smartass as he was

And and as hardass as he tried to act

Deep down he was as emotional and kindhearted as both of his girls were

And knowing the women he loved more then life itself were in pain brought tears to his eyes

Jul 6, 2021 6:01 AM

"oh stop with all that nonsense! You're not failing you're mother. Nobody's pissed at you for leaving. They're all drunk and having a bloody good time. Do they wish you were there, yes? Do they understand why you left, yes? Don't worry about it!" Widow said

and that was enough to finally get though to her

she smiled

your right

im done moping

done crying

and done being depressed

"I'm going to take action! I'll find a husband and finally get out of here!" Emily declared

and u and maggot are coming with me

when i leave

she added

Jun 26, 2021 11:51 PM

She kissed her finger pressed it to widows head then stood up

Come on widow let’s go back to the party and have some fun

Jun 27, 2021 5:48 AM

"As you wish, dearie." Widow smiled. She was happy Emily was trying to move on. Even if she wasn't entirely happy yet, she could be way less sad.

Jun 27, 2021 11:37 AM

and with that they rejoined the party

the end

Jun 27, 2021 4:53 PM

Yay! Are you happy with how it turned out?

yes very

now we gotta do the other prequel

the bday one

Jun 27, 2021 8:27 PM

The birthday one? I've forgotten about that, what was that one about?

its gonna be a follow up to this one

its one year into her death

Oh right, I remember now.

this is where the things hinted at in the last one come in

we start with her alone in her room once again

the ally virabtes with tiny sobs

and sniffls

she sits on the stepsa buring candle in her lap

cold tears streaking down her pale blue cheeks

shes a mess

her beauful blue hair is a scarggly clumpy tangled mess

her mascura caked in the hollows of her eyes

making her look like a very pretty raccon

Jun 28, 2021 12:46 AM

Depressed, the only light she sees is the flame of the candle. She'd never notice how alive fire was. It made her jealous. "I could snuff you out right now, if I wanted." Emily tells it, her fingers coming close to the flame. But the fire is unafraid. It flickers in, as if she doesn't exist

Snilffing she boldly sticks one finger into the dancing flame

She expects to be burned, to feel any type of pain. But there's nothing. It all just feels cold. She's completely numb, everywhere but in the inside

If I touch a burning candle I can no pain

She whimpered

She try’s again with all the fingers of her right hand

Jun 28, 2021 3:55 PM

but just gets the same reselt

scwoling she looks at her left arm

though tearfilled eyes

and and hand

the skin has startd to dry and flake

from always having it sticking out of the ground

the thing her best friends warned her about has happened

"Horrid. Positively horrid." She sighs, looking forlorn. She wants to be sad about it but somehow she knows it's just how it is. There's no use crying over it

shed begain to rot

she drys her eyes with the backs of her hands then picking up the candle pours some hot wax into her open plam

"Nothing. No pain at all" she sighed, not realizing her guardians were approaching

she wanted to get the knife from under her pillow and slash her wrists

still not noticeing them she puts down the candle gets up and goes to her bed

drawing out the knife

to lost inher own mirsty

to notice

she puts the sharp blad to her left wrist and pulls it arcross

black tarlike blood ozzes from the the cut

bringing froth the smell of rot

but once again she feels no pain

if u cut me with a knife its still the same she sniffles and begins to sob again

her tears salting the wound

Jun 28, 2021 6:49 PM

hey what the hell do u think your doing

maggot yells

starling her and making her drope the knife

Jun 28, 2021 9:49 PM

Jun 29, 2021 8:03 PM

so this is what happens if im not in your head all the time

u go and do something stupid like this

malating your pretty skin

and getting blood blood on your dress

sloppy carless stupid little goose

maggot snerred trying to hide how worryed he is

hurt embrassed and deprssed emily flopps sidways on the matresss and weeps into her pillow her bedgallged hair falling over her face

Jun 30, 2021 4:38 AM

(hi, sorry I was gone yesterday. I had a rough day at work and then just went straight to sleep when I got home.) "oh maggot, that's not the way! You're being too rough on the girl!" Widow chides. Quickly she runs over to Emily, creating a web with her spindly legs and putting it on Emily's wound like a bandage. "Rough!? I'm rough! If she wasn't already dead, she would have killed herself! We can't let her harm herself like that or she'll turn to dust before we know it!" Maggot bristled.

the thought of turning to dust made emily cry even harder

Jun 30, 2021 5:03 PM

"Shh! maggot! See what you did!" Widow snaps before turning to comfort Emily. "Don't listen to him Emmy, that won't happen. You'll have to be older than an Egyptian mummy before that happens. You'll never see that far because you're going to find a nice young man before then."

i dont see how now that im fucking rotting emily sobbed sitting up

look at me she wailes thrusting her [ealing arm at them

pealing

the cut had ripped off a chuck of skin eposing the bone under nethg

Jun 30, 2021 7:22 PM

more tears spill down her cheeks

Jul 1, 2021 1:15 AM

and her bottom lip quakes

"oh...oh dear, now don't cry! Uhm...perhaps the fancy ladies have something to cover it up! Perhaps needle and thread can do the trick." Widow suggested

well what about this emily whimpered getering to her stab wound that had now decayed to the point that her ribs showed

"I...I'm afraid it's too late for that, dear. But maybe the other spiders and I can repair the dress so it doesn't show?" Widow proposed. "What's the point! It would only get ruined again!" Emily wailed.

this is the wosrt fucking brithday ever she howled bursting into deep gurtter sobs

guttler

Jul 1, 2021 5:19 PM

chocking on her own tears

Jul 1, 2021 7:23 PM

"Please, love. Calm yourself. Remember your vow....Things will get better in time." Widow said, trying to console her.

iv tried but al its gotten me is this

emily sniffled

getinering to her arm again

she wiped her tears on the hem of her mothers dress

todays is a very hard day for me

id be 19 today

but inseed im stuck at 18 forever

which in itself wouldnt be so bad

but on top of everthing esle i aslo miss my family

mommy

daddy

lydia

but i never see any of them anymore

im fucking sick of being dead

i want to be alive again

surly there must be some way

Jul 1, 2021 11:47 PM

to revrese this mistake

and let me go back home to my family

she turned back to maggot and widow

maggot was hurt and ready to cry at the of her leaving

widow was alos hurt but maily cause emily spoke like she didnt think they were a good enough family

oh maggot dont u start crying again

i just manged to stop

and widow dont look at me that way

if i hurt your feelings im sorry

u know i think of u as my family

and that i love both more then anything in the world

but i dont belong here

i belonge upstaires

and i think my vow was a mistake

i know i said i would wait as long as it takes but im tired of waiting

i dont want to be patent anymore

iv tried to be happy here but its not working

please tell me is there even the sightst chance i can live again

if so ill anything

Jul 2, 2021 4:47 AM

(whars the raising the dead thing from

emilys black eyes lit up and she smiled for the fisrt time that day

"Oh, what a fantastic idea!

she squealed jumping up

ill go see him right now

maggot u stay here with widow

we dont need a repete of last year

(from what?)

(it was from the bible. Jesus raising Lazarus.)

"Gladly. Just make sure she doesn't go petting all those smelly old crows!" Maggot said back.

(cool

emily just rolled her eyes that was excaty why she told him to stay

ill be back later

and with that she left the ally

u know u just set her up for dissappment

widow said

shes gonna end up getting her poor little heart crushed

hey i was just trying to help

maggot protested

i know and thats very kind of u

and your one to talk widow your the one whos always trying to keep her hopes up

Jul 2, 2021 7:09 PM

"well somebody has to! Tge poor girl is devastated!" Widow snapped

why are u pissed at me what the hell did i do now

maggot snapped back

Jul 2, 2021 9:36 PM

"I'm not pissed I'm just...I'm afraid for Emily. I didn't mean to take it out on you, love. You're just so darn candid." Widow said

im scared for her to i thought she was over this bullshit

uptill today she seemed fine

no nightmares

no crying

she was eating and talking to people

she wasnt even crying in her sleep anmore

and id know if she was cause i live in her head now

but now shes right back where she stared from

she hasnt left her room all day

she looks like shit

she hasnt eaten

shes crying again

and now shes hurting herself

and wants to leave

i dont think shed even want us as parents

and i know u feel the same cause i saw the look on your face

Jul 2, 2021 11:35 PM

Jul 3, 2021 4:07 PM

(sorry gone on family vacation tty on monday!)

Jul 4, 2021 6:35 PM

(hi! I'm back😊) "We just have to keep trying, maggot. She's got to accept the reality of it all. We have to help her, even if she doesn't want our help. We can't let her become a lost soul, forever longing for life and trapped between two worlds." Widow said softly. Maggot was right. What Emily said, how she reacted had broken her heart. But she couldn't abandon Emily.

crawling over to the pillow she curled up and began to wepp softly

holy shit i havent seen u cry since the furnel last year

wiggling over to her

Jul 5, 2021 4:27 PM

his own hurt feelings resufecing

(Emily or widow is crying?)

widow

emily already left

(

"I can cry! I have feelings just like anyone else in this family!" Widow so bed

*sobbed

well at least tell me why

your crying

maggot asked hesently storking her head with his tail

he was used to emily crying but not widow

shed always been the strong put though one

Jul 5, 2021 6:46 PM

Smartass as he was

And and as hardass as he tried to act

Deep down he was as emotional and kindhearted as both of his girls were

And knowing the women he loved more then life itself were in pain brought tears to his eyes

Jul 6, 2021 6:01 AM

Jul 6, 2021 4:40 PM

(hi sorry I had a rough day) "Why do you think, Maggot? I keep trying and trying to keep this family together, but nothing I do is working. Emily is kind, but we're not really her family." Widow sobbed.

maggot was shocked at how much she sounded like him

right now

he wanted to tell her she was wrong but he could

not

so he jusy layed down next to her hugged her tight

and let the tears ran down his cheeks

i guess this means wer not gonna apot her after all are we

he whimperd

Jul 6, 2021 7:31 PM

"No...no maggot. We are. It's just...it's just going to be harder than we thought." Widow sbiffled

*sniffled

he nodded

as she wrapped her eight legs around him

then the two of them just lay there and cried their broken little hearts out

0 notes

deepspace-nasty · 10 months ago

Text

reblogging again because i ended up writing my thoughts for you. might've gone crazy but. (throws this and scuttles into the dark) under a read more because its. A Lot

But like a frozen lake in January, Jayce had been scared shitless to even come near, much less throw himself at you. -- love Love LOVE !! when characters are so scared to fall in love. especially with jayce, hes made to be such a prominent figure that he doesnt know what to do with himself - and with the prospects of having to deal with his lower half later on down the line if he does fall for you making it much worse, it makes a delicious concoction of "oh god oh no" and "i want you, i need you" that i find so delightful

With you, he wanted to be stupid. He wanted to he stupid as you touched the shin of your leg to his under the coffee shop table, he wanted to be stupid when you’d gently run your fingertips up the inside of his forearm during some terrible action movie at the local theater. -- i think i need him to be stupid for me too WOAH WHO SAID THAT. crazy draft in here guys

That night, Jayce had clutched his pillow and sobbed and wondered how he could have gotten so lucky. -- JAYCE =[[[ i frowned so hard irl, i need him to know i want to kiss him so sweetly. i love him so much

Luckily, Jayce didn’t have to fake an indigestion — the mere thought of going, with you, wearing nothing but his swimming trunks had been enough to make him throw up the day before (...) -- ☹️☹️☹️☹️ he deserves the world and the best and sloppiest head i can give him

But now you call him puppy when he presses his face into your hands, you call him princess when he’s shy, you call him sweetheart when you want to kiss him, you call him darling when he wakes up, you call him sweet thing when something’s not quite right. -- oouuuugghhhh pet names !!!! pet names that you use enough that he recognizes the tone and context of them without anything else ???!!!! sign me tf up !!!!!

“I want you,” he blurts(...) -- this mightve made me giggle because it reminds me of the cars meme that says this (link)

(...) it’s a word he’s sorely reminded of every time he encounters the prefix micro, and, unfortunately for him, he loves his microwaved ramen soup, and he went into fucking science, so he’s already making his life harder than he should. -- JAYCE. hes so. dare i say it. pathetic. and i love him and thats so endearing. jayce my love. i know i should feel bad but. gods. i cant help but giggle at this

(...) “and how much it means to me that you trusted me enough to tell me." / And he’d never thought of it like that. -- RRRDJAHSJSKAK sorry just. oh my gosh. his feelings of self sabotage and hatred just. destroy that oart of his thinking. head in hands. oouuuugghhhh im sick.

“Jayce, I’d still love you (...) don’t you realize how wonderful you are?” -- i think this section really. hits. its so well written dicax. this is amazing. i think i need this injected into my blood stream and im not joking.

You’ve never been this close. It’s never felt so good. -- genuinely i think this section, from when he says i love you, to. idk the whole fic LMAO make me so light headed w happiness and joy ! it just feels so airy and bright? somehow ? and i absolutely adore it

“I, um… sure I won’t crush you? You sure this— is how you want me?” / “Yes,” you answer, and your lack of hesitation is assuring. -- yeah i think even if he were to crush me id be going out a happy man- WOW THE DRAFT ON THIS WEBSITE.

When his crotch settles against your lower tummy, Jayce instinctively tucks a hand between your bodies, over himself. -- no notes i just want to see it written again. fave paragraph i think.

“Can I kiss you, puppy?” (...) “Yes,” he gasps, with an unfamiliar, heady drunkenness. -: another one that i just wanted to see again. puppy boy jayce is best jayce

Everything’s on fire where you touch it, everything itches for more, and your hands soothe and make it so much worse all at once. Jayce wishes he could shed his skin just so you could touch deeper. Feel more. There’s nothing but tingling, maddening warmth all over. -- read this. read it again. i want you to internalize this. uuuughhhfjakxkda (melts)

“Closer,” he gasps, like that’s anywhere within the realm of possibility. You grab his meaty hips like a cat pouncing on prey, nearly sinking your claws into them, and his pelvis clashes with yours like two flintstones creating a spark. -- GIGGLES LIKE A CARTOON EVIL VILLAIN. YES. OOOHHH MY GOD YES.

(...) "wanna forget where I end and you begin.” -- this shit. is like. so hot. the melding of souls and bodies?? hottest shit in the world

To think you’d ever want to leave when you’re devouring him. Absurd. -- UESASSBJSNSNSBDNND DEVOUR THAT MAN !!!!!!!!! PUT HIM IN YOUR MOUTH AND CLAMP YOUR TEETH DOWN !!!!!!!!!!

(...) all he can do is let you lick the inside of his mouth while he moans like a girl. -- im normal about him (is so pale from blood rushing to my cock i look sick)

Jayce comes down from it shivering, like it wrecked him. He can’t gulp down enough air to sate his lungs, even though he’s gasping for lungfuls. He wonders what your voice’ll sound like when he can hear more than static fuzz. He wonders what your hands will feel like when his skin stops tingling. He wonders what his brain will think once it stops buzzing. / As it turns out, that first thought is shame, except now it crashes down on him tenfold. Without meaning to, he lifts his hips, covering the wet spot at the front of his jeans and wondering why, how. -- is it mean that i love him being embarrassed like this. obviously its not the point of the story, and there is an underlying current of anxiety and the like, but. H. Hes So. Gods.

“We can go together. Just— could you hold me? For just a bit longer?” / There’s another kiss pressed to the top of his head. “I could hold you forever.” -- ooohohdjksmsm the kiss !! the vulnerability !!! waartatsgdbskndns !!!!!!!!!!

dicax youve done it again. genuinely i think you are my favorite writers ever, not even considering the jayce fanfiction that i found you from hahha - you have a wonderful way with words, and your writing can evoke such strong imagery that it is palpable in ny mind's eye. you are such a large inspiration, and i am so happy whenever i see your writing pop up on my feed(s)

this was an amazing read, and very hot- jayce being vulnerable with the reader, trusting them, and taking steps to be more comfortable with himself, and them?! amazing, i love it so much.

small and micro dicks get a lot of flack (as you and others have mentioned) but as someone who stuggles with penetration (and doesn't really have the drive nor need to prep for my preferred penetration lol) i think they are wonderful ! def need more appreciation, not only in writing and fan content but irl as well. big dicks are good but small ones are where its at haha

anyway, dicax, i hope you are doing fantastic. you have made my night with this and i will probably be dreaming of it when i go to bed. jayce's beautiful blushing face and little dick <33

lover, be good to me

18+ MDNI Jayce Talis x GN Reader Word count: 5.1k Synopsis: Jayce unlearns shame. Tags/warnings: Jayce has a small dick, sub Jayce, premature ejaculation, dry humping, love and reassurance. Notes: Just like Jayce, I am also unlearning some shame in the process of posting this. Yes, you got it right -- this is a fully serious fic about him having a micropenis and navigating that. I'm aware small dicks are the butt end of many jokes on the internet, so I'm taking it in my hands not to just normalize it, but to romanticize small dick. I'm also aware that this isn't something most people enjoy fantasizing about, especially when it comes to characters they want to fuck, and that's so okay. If you decide to read on out of nothing but sheer curiosity, I still hope you enjoy Jayce's struggles (and wins!) regarding relationships, love and self-esteem. This might just turn into a miniseries. We shall see.

You’d barged into his life just in time to light up the end of January.

Jayce had clung to the seven hours of daylight which his workday took up in their entirety, he’d showed up for the gym even through the slew of people coming in to follow through on the new year’s resolution they’d end up dropping by the start of February, he’d gone to the same coffee shop he’d been going to since he’d moved to this part of town.

On all accounts, it shouldn’t have been an eventful year. It shouldn’t have been the year he’d finally have more than an uncomfortable smile and shake of his head to offer his mama when she’d pose the dreadful question over their weekly Sunday dinner, it shouldn’t have been the year he suddenly found himself waking up excited, it shouldn’t have been the year he threw caution in the wind.

But it is.

Falling for you in the winter had been easy. The first smile you’d offered him after you’d shaken his hand at Vi’s monthly drink-and-lose-your-money-at-poker-parties had made the mere idea of just seven hours of sunlight perfectly bearable. It’d made his lax, dry handshake go wet with exhilarated and unfortunate palm sweat, it’d made his heart leap like he’d actually drank the stupid vodka-redbull cocktail Vi had pushed onto him instead of dumping it into the bathroom sink.

It made losing all of ten bucks to you in the next round of poker worth it.

But like a frozen lake in January, Jayce had been scared shitless to even come near, much less throw himself at you.

He’d watched from a safe distance, laughed at your jokes, tossed some of his own back, marveled at your smile.

He’d never expected to be pulled in.

You’d asked him out on a not-really-a-date-but-I’d-like-to-get-to-know-you-better outing after the second party of Vi’s you’d spent tiptoeing around each-other, which, by all accounts, was the most wonderful thing to ever happen to Jayce.

And by far the most downright terrifying.

Against better judgement, on that very same night, he’d finally texted you back to ask for the time and place of your not-date.

The fact that you’d replied instantly felt like lake ice cracking under his feet.

Jayce wasn’t unused to being wanted. There’d been enough people to consider him handsome enough to hit on at bars, or even try to not so subtly get into his pants at the academy. He’d gone on a date or two, through his college years.

But he’d never wanted someone quite this badly.

He’d had crushes he’d reasoned himself out of, of course he had; his heart was quick to go soft on anyone offering him any kind of genuine attention, but he’d been smart enough not to let it get too far.

He’d wanted to he stupid when you’d asked him if he’d like this to be serious.

He’d wanted to be so, so very stupid when he’d leaned into your cupped palm and let you lay the gentlest kiss to his lips.

You’d asked him, in all your cluelessness, what he was shaking for. You’d kissed his forehead like you hadn’t figuratively plunged him into ice cold water with just the brush of your lips to his hairline, you’d held him, and cooed at him, whispered about how there was nothing to be scared of.

There was so much.

For every hug he spent uncomfortably tilting his hips back and wondering if you could feel anything (or a lack thereof), for every time he got the urge to throw up and run when your hand touched anywhere near his navel, for every time your thigh had drifted between his legs and he’d jumped like he’d been burnt, you’d been gentle, kind, understanding.

You’d cradled his face one mild, cloudy day in mid-April and told him you weren’t expecting anything. You’d kissed the bridge of his nose like a promise, and told him he should never feel like you’re trying to get anything from him — when and where anything sex-related was supposed to happen was entirely in his hands, you’d said.

And you’d promised you had plenty of patience to spare — especially for him. Especially for this.

That night, Jayce had clutched his pillow and sobbed and wondered how he could have gotten so lucky.

And when that luck would inevitably run out.

You didn’t deserve to be strung along, especially not forever. He couldn’t give you anything.

And it felt wrong to keep you waiting, with the false promise that he would.

But he’d done it anyway. For once in his life, Jayce had been truly and utterly selfish, savoring every moment with you with the looming threat of his own shortcomings breathing down the back of his neck.

He’d clung to you — to the time he had with you until this relationship was going to meet its inevitable demise — hopelessly, tirelessly, he’d locked every squeeze of your hand and every wrinkle below your smiling eyes and every ridge of your warm palm and every speck of pigment on your iris deep in his heart, charting whatever he could get out in the greatest details his brain could muster. That, at least, would be his to keep, even after you’d leave.

Loving you in spring came even more easily. The sunlight became kinder, your eyes brighter, your jokes more intimate. There were times when something had caught his eye, and before he could open his mouth to get out the first word about it, you’d be waiting to meet his gaze with a knowing glint in your eyes. The squeezes of your hands lasted longer, your thumb lingered at his wrist, rubbing, your kisses at his jaw were crying to go lower, but they never did. Above all the affection you had, which Jayce knew was running rampant, you respected him.

And that, along with summer, made everything more complicated.

With shedded layers of clothes came a new sense of vulnerability. Jayce knew there was nothing to suspect through the coarse material of his jeans or shorts which he’d picked for that very purpose, but when you’d stayed over one late May evening, he’d frantically dug through his drawers for his fleece pajama pants.

“I get really cold at night,” he’d lied. You hadn’t said a thing, though he’d been sorely aware of the way they stuck to his sweaty legs in the morning.

Caitlyn had asked him out at a pool party, at the start of June, with you obviously invited as well. Luckily, Jayce didn’t have to fake an indigestion — the mere thought of going, with you, wearing nothing but his swimming trunks had been enough to make him throw up the day before, and he’d had a good enough reason to sit it out.

But now it’s late June and your wine glass is fogging up with the warmth of your laughing breath after a particularly bad joke of his. He’s sure he’s sweating so much he’ll leave a stain the size of his back on your couch, and that his Hawaiian shirt is glued tight to that icky, sweaty space between his shoulder blades.

Your hand, carefully placed at the top of his thigh, yearning but not demanding, gently scratching at him through his jeans, is making his leg bounce. Your smile, wine-softened and heartachingly giddy makes something in Jayce’s chest clench.

He wants to know what your skin tastes like. He wants your mouth claiming every inch of his body, teeth dragging across his damp skin, he wants your breath to mingle with his. He aches with the need of it, his brain buzzes with alcohol-induced horniness and alcohol-diminished sensibility, he wants, he wants, he wants.

His mouth is dry. He wants it slick with your spit.

“What’s the matter?”

Your index circles at the top of his thigh like a question mark.

“With me?” Jayce asks, dumbly.

You smile. Your hand squeezes the meat of his thigh where it tapers off into his knee. “Felt like I lost you there for a second. Everything alright, sweet thing?”

You’ve called him every iteration and combination of sickeningly names that would have made him gag before he met you. But now you call him puppy when he presses his face into your hands, you call him princess when he’s shy, you call him sweetheart when you want to kiss him, you call him darling when he wakes up, you call him sweet thing when something’s not quite right.

The tendons in your neck stretch with the questioning tilt of your head, the space between your parted lips invites his tongue to nestle between them, the warmth of your hand is soaking through his jeans.

“I want you,” he blurts, without even realizing what he’d just said before he hears himself rasp the words through his dry throat.

“You have me,” you say, like it’s that easy.

It makes Jayce go silent, buzzy mind suddenly quiet with the daunting realization that he soon won’t. Not after you’ll know. Not after he tells you.

“Whenever you feel ready,” you reassure, finding his hand and rubbing a by now familiar circle into his wrist, which Jayce dedicates to memory as possibly the last, “you have me.”

Except he won’t.

But you deserve to know, Jayce reasons — he’s wasted six of your months on him, selfishly clinging to your affection though he knows he will never live up to what you’re hoping he is.

You, in all your kindness and respect and reverence and loving… you don’t deserve another single month, week, day, hour, minute wasted on his denial and lies. You deserve the truth.

“I’m so sorry,” Jayce says.

“We don’t have to do anything now,” you assure, and he’s sure those words taste achingly familiar by now. You’ve said them more often than he’s deserved hearing them.

And he does have to do something now. Just not what you think.

As he draws in a fortifying breath to just say it, you speak before he can, rushing to get out the words.

“And I just— listen, Jayce, if there’s, you know, something else going on, like, I don’t know, uh, one of your balls is bigger than the other or some unusual birthmark or anything else, that— it doesn’t matter to me. Okay?”

And what he wouldn’t give to have one testicle bigger than the other or some strange birthmark rather than this. He still derives some momentary relief from your reassurance, clings to some false hope that makes his confession just the slightest bit easier.

“It’s none of those things,” he admits. “I, uh…” he swallows, and grips your hand like it’s the last time. He doesn’t think he’s ever admitted it out loud. He’s never had to — always ran from whatever situation could have lead to it before he would have had to.

You lean in a smidge closer, squeeze his hand a hint tighter. It makes him physically sick.

Jayce shrinks in on himself without meaning to, and from the way you exhale, it’s either breaking your heart or frustrating you. He hopes it’s the former. He crosses his legs. He draws in one last, steadying breath. This is where it ends.

“I have a small dick.”

He doesn’t look at your face, doesn’t want to hear a thing, he lets his ears ring and his brain go numb and his muscles go taut waiting for the impact of a sentence or a mocking laugh or something.

“That’s it?” You say, and though you say it in disbelief, rather than with malice, Jayce can’t help but imagine it in an even worse context than this. It’s what he’s been hearing you say in his head every time you’ve invited him to hop into the shower with you or held him anywhere near his waist while you cuddled.

But that is very obviously not it. You must think he’s exaggerating, that he’s just shy. He can’t let you give him the benefit of the doubt, not anymore.

“When I say small I mean, uh…” Jayce loses his wording, and, overwhelmed with shame, he lowers his face into his free hand. He doesn’t have the heart to even peek at you through his fingers. Jesus Christ, he thinks, here goes. “I mean really small. I don’t mean short of five inches small, I don’t mean, smaller than average, I mean— fuck. Fuck. Listen, I’m, I have a— I have a micropenis.”

He can actually count the times he’s said that word out loud on one hand. It’s a word he hates even thinking about, it’s a word he mishears during normal, unrelated conversations more often than he’d care to admit, it’s a word he’s sorely reminded of every time he encounters the prefix micro, and, unfortunately for him, he loves his microwaved ramen soup, and he went into fucking science, so he’s already making his life harder than he should.

But then you make it so easy.

You hold his hand in both of yours now, slowly bringing his knuckles to your lips and kissing them the same way you’d kissed his forehead all those months ago. You press in a little closer to his side, not invasively, but enough to have your knee nudging his.

“Can you look at me, sweetheart?”

And so he does, peeking at you from between his ring finger and middle finger, resisting the urge to apologize again.

Why are you smiling?

“I don’t think I can put into words how little that matters to me,” you say, and Jayce wants to argue with it, to ask you not to be kind now because you deserve better, you deserve someone who can give you everything, and he can’t, he can’t, “and how much it means to me that you trusted me enough to tell me.”

And he’d never thought of it like that.

All this time, he’d thought of it as holding on to you, to his love for you, for just another day. Another minute. As long as he could.

Not once had he thought of it as giving you the time to win his trust.

But he’s being selfish to reframe it like this, and he has been selfish for all of six months now, and he’s going to be selfish if he lets you believe this when you have no idea what you’re getting yourself into.

He’s broken in a way that can’t be fixed, and there will never be enough love to throw at this part of himself to change his limitations. You’re getting yourself into this because, god help you, you like him, and you think this is the kind of thing that can be compromised on. That can be worked through.

Jayce knows it isn’t. From the first chick he’d allowed to take his pants off when he was nineteen and drunk at a house party and just wanted to get losing his virginity over with (she’d left without a word as soon as she caught a glimpse of the outline of his erection through his boxers), to the guy who’d grinded himself against him at a gay bar when he was twenty three and got mad because he couldn’t feel a hard-on, fuck, even from the my-dick-is-bigger-than-yours conversations his peers had shared in the seventh grade boys’ locker rooms, Jayce fucking knows better.

“I can’t— we can’t. You have no idea what—“

“Jayce, I’d still love you, and want to be with you even if you’d told me you’d never want sex.”

That alone is enough to make him lift his face from the sweaty expanse of his own palm.

“You were alright with… no sex?” He swallows. “Ever?”

“Jesus, Jayce, for a guy like you, I’d accept fucking my own hand for probably the rest of my life. I mean, have you… don’t you realize how wonderful you are?”

That word collides with the walls of his skull and bounces around in it like a fucking two thousands DVD logo before he dares internalizing it, and he finds himself sobbing before it sinks to the bottom of his brain like a penny in a wishing well. Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful.

For the first time in six months, Jayce is the one to throw himself into a kiss. He cradles your face in his sweaty palms like it’s a porcelain vase, he kisses your lips like he wants to eat you.

“I love you,” he sobs, gasping for breath and licking into your mouth and sniffling and smiling and laughing and Jesus fucking Christ, he can’t think straight. “I love you.”

Your hands cup his cheeks, the way they do when you call him puppy and he nuzzles his nose into them, but right now he thinks he’s spent long enough limiting himself to your hands and lips — he wants to know the insides of your mouth.

“I love you too,” you say the second you draw back and gulp down just enough air to breathe it back out at him. Your hands are on his neck, scratching at his five o’clock shadow, your breath is humid on his slick lips.

“I’ve wanted… you for so long,” he mutters. Jayce doesn’t know where to put his hands, he paws at your clothed shoulders clumsily. “Felt so desperate for you that it hurt.”

“Not anymore,” you coo at him, nosing under his jaw. He resists the reflex to jerk away even as you put your hands on his hips and tug him closer. Not close enough for you to feel any of him yet, but close enough to assure him you want him just as bad. “I’ve got you. I’ve got you, Jayce, I’m so sorry it took so long—“

He shakes his head, and has to hold in a genuine giggle at the way his nose grazes yours when he does. You’re so warm. Your breath tickles. You’ve never been this close. It’s never felt so good.

“My fault,” he says. “I was scared.”

He still is.

You brush the hair from his face, smiling up at him like he’s the last ray of sunlight after the winter solstice. “Not anymore.”

“Not anymore.” How he wishes it were true.

You press one last kiss to his lips, not a hungry one, not licking into his mouth, just a brush of your lips, not so different from the first kiss you’d gifted him all these months ago. Not a single one of them wasted, Jayce realizes. Hopefully.

You sit there for a second, simply taking him in, one hand on his face, the other at his ribcage. His heart flutters below it like a trapped bird.

And then he laughs. He’s not sure why, but he laughs like you just told him a tremendous little joke, or like you’re jabbing your fingers into his sides, but it’s none of those things, it’s like his heart is leaping and he’s not sure what to do to keep up with it other than laugh.

You hold him like you understand. And judging from the wide, near-dopey smile on your face, you do.

“Come here,” you say, rubbing at his sweaty back, pawing at him like you need him closer.

“How—?” Jayce clears his throat awkwardly, and looks at the space between you with a clueless nervousness. “Where do you want me? How do you want me?”

“You could sit on my lap, if… you want to. If that’s alright.”

You turn from how you’ve been sitting cross-legged to face him, and now your legs dangle off the couch and your soles are set nice and sturdy on the floor. The flat of your thighs is undeniably inviting, but that’s nothing new.

“Yeah,” Jayce agrees, and, for possibly the first time in his life, spreads his knees and puts them on either side of your thighs. Awkwardly, he hovers, and his knees suddenly feel weak even though he’s just hit a new deadlift PR at the gym last week. “I, um… sure I won’t crush you? You sure this— is how you want me?”

“Yes,” you answer, and your lack of hesitation is assuring. Your hands settle on his hips, not pulling, not pushing, just soothing.

Slowly, he sits himself on your lap, dropping the first half of his weight on you gradually, carefully watching your face, before, with a little nod from you, he finally settles.

It’s so good. It’s so terrifying.

When his crotch settles against your lower tummy, Jayce instinctively tucks a hand between your bodies, over himself.

Your hand follows suit, fingernails gently scratching at the inside of his forearm in a way that raises goosebumps.

“We don’t have to do anything tonight,” you say. “Knowing, understanding, it’s… it really is enough for me for now. Want you to be ready. Just— don’t hide yourself from me. You don’t have to do that anymore.”

Jayce swallows down a chunk of his fear that doesn’t want to be chewed through, and slowly lifts his hand from between his legs with a stuttered breath. Before he gets to even bring the tip of his tongue to the back of his teeth to form the s in sorry, you’re already cooing at him, arms winding around his shaky, meek frame.

“There you go.”

It suddenly hits him that he’s far too overwhelmed to do anything other than melt in your arms and let you hold him. But an uncomfortable question gnaws at the back of his mind as he feels himself going stiff, and he dreads just about any answer you could give.

“Can you feel anything?” He wishes he hadn’t asked.

But you nod, and he’s not sure if he should be apologizing or pulling away, until you speak. “I can feel you relaxing… going softer in my arms.”

And he doesn’t think there could be a better reply to his question. His thighs are still shaky with nerves, trembling around your own, but he lets you explore the already familiar regions on his body like they’re new again. And they are, in some delightful way; he gets what you mean as you feel your way down his lower back: he’s going laxer by the minute, basking in your touch like a sleepy cat under the kiss of sunlight.

Letting his body smoothen itself against yours, finally, without caring about giving himself away, it’s blissful enough that his eyes go dewy again with fresh tears.

He never thought the simple act of getting held, of having all of himself enveloped by someone he loves, would be this good. He wants to drown in you. He wants you to be dust and roll around in you. He wants you to be honey and stick to his every crevice.

“Can I kiss you, puppy?”

Jayce perks up at the sound of your voice alone, leans into the hand you bring to the scruff of his nape to gently scratch at it.

“Yes,” he gasps, with an unfamiliar, heady drunkenness. Like the mere contact with you, the mere exchange of your bodies’ warmth, is enough to get his brain boozy, high and dumb.

He wants to drink your breath. Wants to suck it out of your lungs when you press your lips to his, but he settles for sucking on your tongue. Jayce never thought he could feel gluttonous enough to want to consume someone whole, but you’re an exception — you’re an exception in a great deal of many things, and he loves you for it.

Your hands are on his shoulders, then tracing down his spine, down to the chub of his hips that spills out on the side of his jeans, then on the chub at the front of his tummy, and they’re groping and bold and greedy. Everything’s on fire where you touch it, everything itches for more, and your hands soothe and make it so much worse all at once. Jayce wishes he could shed his skin just so you could touch deeper. Feel more. There’s nothing but tingling, maddening warmth all over.

“You’re so, so soft,” you gasp into the spot below his ear. Your teeth scratch at his pulse, killing bite on a prey animal, and Jayce seeks it even though it makes his heart freeze. “Can’t believe I managed to last six months holding you just barely, touching you just barely, when you fit so good in my arms. Wanna melt into you, oh, Jayce, wanna— wanna forget where I end and you begin.”

Something about the rasp of your voice, the way you mutter those words into the side of his neck makes them feel like they’re shot straight into his bloodstream. They make him boil.

He offers himself up to you in the only way that crosses his hazy mind, which is lolling his head to the side and pressing the soft spot under his jaw into your teeth, begging to be claimed.

You take the bait instantly. You lick first, priming the skin with a coat of what must by now be a perfect mixture of his and your spit, and he feels his legs spreading wider on their own accord just from your tongue lapping at his neck.

“Yes,” you gasp, palming at his tailbone in encouragement, “want all of you. Need all of you. Never hide again. Not from me.”

Jayce shakes his head — the mere prospect of it all, the fact that he’d been so desperately afraid — it’s like a dot on the horizon, distant and forgotten. How can there be fear when there’s so much love, so much wanting, so much hunger?

“You have me.” He shivers as you start pawing at his hips again, can’t swallow back a moan when you latch onto his neck and suck. Your mouth is wide open, like you want all of him you can get, like you need a bite of him so big you can’t even begin to chew on it.

To think you’d ever want to leave when you’re devouring him. Absurd.

“I love you,” your voice rumbles in your chest, Jayce can feel it from how he’s pressing his own rib cage into yours. You lick up his neck, up his jaw, kiss your way to the front of his chin in searching. “C'mere to me, fuck, c’mere.”

And the second he tilts his head down to catch your lips, everything in his body goes out like a light. His breath leaves his body like he’s been punched, every softened muscle goes rock hard, his brainstem sparks into electric flames, and all he can do is let you lick the inside of his mouth while he moans like a girl.

He’s frozen, braindead, taut with tension, his ears are ringing, he can’t breathe, Jesus, he can’t breathe, he’s, he’s— oh.

Oh, no.

You shush him, wrapping your arms around his sunken shoulders protectively, cradling him close as he rides out the unexpected wave of his orgasm, kissing his temple as he muffles his cries into your clothed shoulder. He holds onto you like you might fade away if he doesn’t.

“Baby boy,” you coo. “Baaaby boy. There you go.”

As it turns out, that first thought is shame, except now it crashes down on him tenfold. Without meaning to, he lifts his hips, covering the wet spot at the front of his jeans and wondering why, how.

“I’m, hah, so sorry,” he rushes to say. His mind reels with a thousand things he could say to mend the shameful fact that he came in his pants over a kiss. But what is there to say, other than apologize and hope you’d understand? “It happened… so suddenly, really, I didn’t realize, I’m… I’m not like this usually, I promise…”

You run a hand up his sweaty back, reeling him back in gently, reassuringly. You let him tuck his chin between your neck and your shoulder, you hold him like he’s worth his body weight in gold.

And then you laugh.

If this is a dream, he hopes his alarm is hours away.

“Oh, Jayce. Are you kidding? You’re glorious.” You press a quick kiss to his dewy cheek like you mean it, and Jayce wants to believe you do. If the past six months have taught him anything, it’s that you see him in a much kinder light than he’s ever dared stepping into. He wants to believe you mean it. “How do you feel?” You ask, and he realizes he hasn’t got the slightest clue.

Jayce settles on sticky, and tells you so. And decidedly not glorious, but he doesn’t want to contradict you. If you think so of him, he will try his best to let the compliment wash over him.

“We could take a shower,” you suggest. This is your apartment — the thought is daunting. He’s been in your shower before, but it’d always been for quick, desperate pits-junk-ass-and-feet-showers, never more, for fear you’d walk in even though he’d locked the door twice.

And he realizes that fear is not quite gone yet — yes, you’ve reassured him plenty, you’ve held him while he came, but… you haven’t actually seen him.

“I can go first,” you suggest, “and you can join me when you’re ready. Or not at all, if that’s what you’d prefer.”

“I want to,” Jayce says. And though your hands settle on his hips with finality, he powers through the feeling of his own mess sticking to him and tucks his head under your jaw. “We can go together. Just— could you hold me? For just a bit longer?”

There’s another kiss pressed to the top of his head. “I could hold you forever.”

#jayce talis #also my birthday was in january so it was a delightful surprise to see that it started in january lmaoo #you also write gn smut very well ! i appreciate that a lot #as a trans guy lol #its so late but i just needed to get this out #dicax. you are awesome. i genuinely love ur works

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xoxo-teddybear · 4 years ago

Text

What Have I Done? - Bakugou Katsuki

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: Angst, Physical injuries, cursing

Summary: An argument gone out of hand. Y/N just wanted Katsuki to be home more. They’re married and yet she barely sees him throughout the week. When she finally speaks on her hurt feelings, she gets a reaction she definitely wasn’t expecting.

Chapter 1 -> Chapter 2

A/N:.....I cried while writing this.

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

‘He’s gone already. Again. Like always.’

Y/N had awoken to another empty bed. Her husband’s side of the mattress remained cold and empty. This wasn’t anything new. It’s been like this for the past few months. She would wake up alone, eat breakfast alone, spend her day alone, eat dinner alone, and go back to sleep at the end of the day...alone.

It’s not that Katsuki is intentionally ignoring Y/N. He loves her with his everything, he truly does! But villains never rest and neither does he. He’s so preoccupied with hero work that when he does get a day off, his friends drag him away to a bar or game night. Y/N always ran through his head but she had always been so understanding. And besides, she knows how busy the life of a pro is. She used to be one so she gets it. Right?

Wrong. She doesn’t get it. Because even when she was a pro, her and Katsuki always found time for each other. And ever since said man made her quit, claiming he could take care of both of them easily and he would feel better knowing his beloved is safe at home, they’ve seen each other less and less. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. Y/N was willing to quit her dream because she found a new dream in Katsuki. She always imagined that being his little housewife would give them more time together but the opposite of that came true. Now she sits in the big empty house with no company for hours on end.

Her sadness builds up every day. She misses her husband. She tries to be an understanding wife but at this point, it’s like he’s not even trying to make an effort to see her. It’s like he’s settled to just coming home to her sleeping form and waking up to her in the exact same state, leaving before he can witness her do anything else. He should understand her though, no? I mean, she had brought it up to him in a very casual way and so he never took it seriously, but she’s mentioned it before. He should have a pretty vivid image of how shes been feeling. Right?

After 6 months of loneliness and being ‘Katsuki-deprived,’ Y/N made her move to speak to her husband about her feelings. She already imagined the outcome. An argument due to Katsuki’s brash behavior and her ‘never back down’ attitude, sad times bringing in the silent treatment for the two of you up until the both of you give in and forgive each other due to the love you have. Finally ending in a compromise. Y/N released a heavy breath as she looked at the time.

1:36 a.m. Just a few more minutes until Katsuki’s home.

—

He was pissed. 3 large scale bank robberies, 10 villain-wannabe fights, an argument with his publicist about his ‘out of line attitude,’ and Deku replacing him on a random ass billboard. The last detail wouldn’t have mattered if it was anybody else but the fact that it was Deku had him riled up. He just wanted to go home to a quiet house with his beautiful wife and admire her gorgeous, slumbering state. However that was not what he was greeted with.

Katsuki grumbled as he unlocked the front door and walked in. He noticed the lights were still on and saw Y/N still awake, seated on the couch. On any other day, he’d be elated to see his wife was still up. They’d talk and cuddle and go to sleep together. If he was lucky, they’d both make love until the sun rose. But tonight, that wouldn’t be happening. He wanted a quiet house with his sleeping wife. Not..whatever was about to happen. He sighed as he dropped his bag at the front door and sloppily placed his keys in the glass bowl near the door.

“What’re you doing up dumbass?” He asked as he walked to the kitchen, not even bothering to take off his shoes. He needed a drink.

“I was waiting for you, Katsuki. I just wanted to talk to you about something,” you said in a soft voice, hoping it would suppress his for sure incoming anger. Katsuki closed the fridge with a kick to the heavy door and chugged down a quarter of his drink.

“I’m not in the mood. Had a shitty day and I wanna sleep. Just go to bed.” He said sternly while trying to finish his beer as fast as he could.

“Don’t you think I would’ve done that hours ago? I wouldn’t have stayed up and waited for you if this wasn’t important. Please Katsuki, I really wanna talk.” Bakugou was beginning to grow annoyed. Why wouldn’t you just drop it already? He squeezed his bottle hard enough for it too crack before he spoke with a louder voice.

“Y/N! You’re not listening! I’m tired. I had a horrible day and I just want to sleep. I don’t want to talk, I don’t want to stay up anymore, and I don’t want to listen to whatever bullshit you’re about to complain and bitch about like you always do!” He screamed. His words made your jaw drop.

“Not listening?! That’s all I do! All I do is listen to your every command so that you come home happy-“

“Well it looks like you failed today!” He said, cutting you off.

“Quit interrupting! And what was it that you said?! All I do is bitch and complain?! I’m trying to talk to you about something serious here Katsuki!” You pleaded, still hoping he would give in and listen. And he did...just not in the way you’d expect.

“Fine then! If this’ll get you to quit being an annoying ass waste of time, then speak! Talk! What the hell do you want?!” He asked, screaming at you, furious at all the dramatics you’ve brought up in one night.

His words kind of stung. ‘Annoying ass? Waste of time? Is this what he thinks I am?’ You grew silent at his insults and Katsuki seethed even more.

“Oh what? I scream at you and you bitch up? Toughen up Y/N, jeez. Quit acting like a baby! Tell me what you wanted to say!” He yelled.

“.......I just....I just wanted you to spend some time with me. .....Be home more.” You said in a quiet and broken voice. You looked down to the now very interesting floor as you played with your hands.

“Seriously? This shit again? I’m a pro-hero, Y/N! I’m busy! I’m not gonna drop saving lives just because your brat ass wants someone to notice you! Since when were you such an attention whore?” He asked while rolling his neck to relieve his strained muscles. Your eyes widen at the ground due to his words and your head snapped back up to face him.

“A-attention whore? I-...I just want my husband to stop working so much. I don’t know..maybe have a day off or two!” She said with a crinkled nose as you screamed.

“I do have days off, Moron. It’s why I’m not overworked, ever thought about that?!” He screamed back.

“And you spend those days off away from me! I’m not trying to act like the world revolves around me but I would hope my own husband would spend a day with me instead of his friends that he ALWAYS sees because you ALL WORK TOGETHER!” You argued. You made a valid point and even Katsuki knew that, but he was too stubborn to admit defeat. He was still tired but he had enough energy to put you back in your place. His eyes popped as a vein grew on his neck.

“Well- WELL YOU’RE ONCE AGAIN JUST BITCHING AND COMPLAINING LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO! I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY YOU’RE SO UPSET!” He screamed.

“Don’t understand?! You know what? I know you don’t because you never listen to-“

“SHUT THE FUCK UP, I WASNT DONE TALKING! ALL YOU DO IS SIT AROUND THE HOUSE, LAZING AROUND, DOING NOTHING BUT TRY TO ARGUE WITH-“

“LAZING AROUND?!” You shouted in disbelief. “WHO MAKES YOUR MEAL PREP THE NIGHT BEFORE SO YOU CAN ENJOY IT AT WORK AND IN THE MORNING? WHO CLEANS THE ENTIRE HOUSE EVERYDAY WHILE YOU’RE GONE? WHO MAKES SURE YOU HAVE A FULL FRIDGE, CLEAN HOUSE, GOOD FOOD, AND A HAPPY LIFE? ME KATSUKI! ME!”

“Happy life? DO I LOOK HAPPY TO YOU BITCH?! NEWSFLASH, IM NOT! SO CONGRATS Y/N! YOU FAILED ONCE AGAIN! AND WHO GIVES A FUCK IF YOU PLAY MAID WHILE IM AWAY?! IM BUSY SAVING THE FUCKING WORLD! THE LEAST YOU COULD DO IS BE A GOOD WIFE SINCE YOU CANT EVEN BE A FUCKING PRO ANYMORE!” He insulted again.

“because of FUCKING YOU!” You argued once more.

“I DID IT FOR YOU!” He said while throwing his bottle to the wall, causing it to shatter. “I DO EVERYTHING FOR YOUR UNGRATEFUL BITCH ASS! I PAY THE BILLS! I BRING HOME THE CASH! I GIVE YOU THE MONEY TO BUY ALL THE FUCKING FOOD, CLOTHES, AND ANY OTHER STUPID SHIT YOU WANT! AND ON TOP OF THAT, I STUFF YOUR STUPID CUNT TO PLEASURE YOUR UNGRATEFUL ASS. AT THIS POINT, YOU’RE JUST A WALKING HOLE FOR ME TO USE!”

His words hurt. They broke your heart. Did he really feel this way? If so, why was he even with you anymore. You notice a smirk grow on his face at your bewildered state. He looked as if he just won something. However, the smirk dropped into a scowl once he saw your eyes begin to pool with tears.

“Oh great! Cry! Go ahead! Just shed your fucking tears like you always do! I’m going to bed! Come join me when you’re done being an annoying bitch.” He said and stuffed his hands in his pockets as he began to walk away. You didn’t want the conversation to go this way and there was no conclusion. You needed this to be resolved now. You just wanted your husband back. You reached out to stop him from walking but the unforeseen happened.

“Katsuki..don’t walk away from thi-“

“DONT FUCKING TOUCH ME!” He said and smacked your arms away with a burning palm. Without realizing, Katsuki began to spark his quirk and so when he went in to push you away, he burned your forearm.

A loud blast and smoke filled the room and your screams of pain invaded his ears. The sound made a shocked face grow on him as he quickly turned to see the damaged he had caused. His heart sank as he saw you crying while holding your burnt arm with your other hand. You were slightly hunched over in pain as you took notice of the damage that had been caused. That he caused.

“Y/N!” Bakugou softly shouted as he ran to you. He wanted to help but before he could even lay a finger on you, you flinched. The action caused him to hesitate and hold himself back. He ran to the kitchen sink to get a cold rag and he brought it back to you. “Baby! I am so sor-“

You pushed him away and off of you as you quickly walked to your bedroom with a shadow casted over your eyes. Tears still flowed down your cheeks as sniffles could be heard from your cherry red nose. Katsuki couldn’t believe what he just did and ran to follow you.

“Y/N! Please listen! I didn’t mean it! I don’t know how that happened Teddy Bear but I swear I didn’t mean it! I swear I didn’t mean any of the bullshit I said! I’m sor-“

*SLAM* *click!*

Katsuki realized he followed you out the kitchen, through the living room, up the stairs, and to the entrance of the master bedroom you both shared before you slammed the door and locked it right in his face.

“Baby! Please open the door!” He said while knocking in a very rushed manner. He wanted nothing more than to help you and treat the damage he caused to his beloved wife. He had royally fucked up. He began turning and jiggling the locked knob in an attempt to get it open but failed. “Please Y/N! I have to take care of you and that burn. I’m so sorry but please let me in!”

On the other side of the door, you pressed your back against it as you held in your sobs and slid to the bottom. You pulled both lips in to conceal your voice while you held your wrist to examine the burn on your arm. It was so bad. Your skin turned an angry shade of red as it blistered and bled. You were dripping blood all over your carpeted floor and so you ran to the master bathroom in the bed room.

You turned on the sink and placed your forearm under the cold, running water. The water soothed it a bit but it wasn’t enough to cover the pain. You turned off the sink and grabbed a hand rag as you patted down on your wound. You took out the first aid kit and cared for yourself. You had to take the alcohol to clean it and sucked in a breath before you poured the solution over the burn. You screamed as it seemed to have hurt 10x more. After dabbing cotton over it, you wrapped it in bandages and took a breath of relief.

‘What just happened?’ You thought to yourself.

The entire time, Katsuki was still begging for you to open up. He heard your scream and grew frantic. He banged on the door and cried for you, still hoping, praying, that you would let him in. When nothing happened, he resorted back to calling out for you but to no avail.

About an hour went by and it was almost 4 in the morning. You sat on the bed with your arms holding your knees to your chest. You stared at the wrap as the memories of what went down tonight flashed through your brain.

‘Waste of time...brat ass...attention whore...ungrateful...annoying bitch.’

His words struck you right in your heart. Cruel thoughts began to fill your head.

‘He doesn’t love me. He hates me. I’m worthless.’ Your thoughts would’ve continued until a quiet knock snapped you out of you mind.

“....Y/N?...Baby?” It was Katsuki of course, but a softer version of him. A broken one. “..I don’t know if you’re listening or if you’re awake..but I need you to know that I’m so so sorry.” It was easy to hear his muffled and staggered voice that exposed his tears and sobs. “If I could turn back time right now, I would do tonight all over again, I swear. I would’ve came home and listened to you. And we could’ve talked things out. We would’ve came out of this problem being a stronger couple than we were before...because that’s what we always do. We always make it out of the dark together..because we’re a team..and I need you. .....Please...please don’t leave me Y/N. I love you so much. ‘M so sorry that I hurt you..that I burned you..that I’m such a terrible husband. But I promise you I’ll fix everything in the morning...................Teddy Bear?”

He didn’t know it, but you were listening. You heard every word but refrained from speaking. You knew that the second you did, you’d break down and go crawling back to him....but you didn’t want to do that. You wanted to leave. He physically burned you and you wanted to leave. You were going to sleep for a few hours, and when you would awaken, you would pack a bag and leave. And so, you began your plan and tried to get some sleep as tear streaks marked your face. It would all be over soon.

You woke up to the morning sun.

6:50 a.m.

You rose out of bed and rubbed at your puffy eyes. You quietly got ready in the bathroom and applied the slightest bit of makeup to look more presentable. You took out a pair of shoes and tossed them to the center of the room. You were in your closet and pulled out a bag. You stuffed it full of a few clothes for you to wear, you couldn’t stay here. Not after what he did. You fought through the pain as you pulled on your jacket and placed your shoes on. You wiped your tears as you picked up your purse and got ready to leave. You were going to stay in a hotel. Didnt matter where or how expensive. You just needed to get away.

Finally, you walked to the exit of the bedroom. You took a breath before you slowly turned the knob and was greeted with the sight of a sleeping Bakugou. He had slept in the hallway in front of the bedroom, still wearing the same clothes from the night before. His knees were scrunched up with his arms resting there to be used as a pillow. He layed his head atop of his arms and as you looked down into his hands, you saw the rag. The exact rag from the argument. The rag that he attempted to use to help you. Little did you know, Bakugou hadn’t planned on getting rid of it until you let him use it to help you. He wanted nothing more than to fix his mistake and cater to you and your wound.

You shook your head as you felt tears began to fill your eyes but you refused to let them fall. You took a step and sadly awoken the exact man you were trying to avoid. Bakugou had quickly woken up when he heard the slightest noise and was blessed with the beauty that is you. He looked up at you with wide eyes and a small smile.

“Y/N...” was what he whispered before he quickly got up to run to you.

“Y/N!” He ecstatically said with a hint of relief. He was about to wrap him arms around you but you kept a hand at his chest to keep him at bay. “Baby?...”

Bakugou looked at you with hurt and confused eyes when you didn’t welcome his embrace. Even when you were mad at him, you still allowed him to hold you so what gives? He looked at you and your attire. He noticed your jacket and shoes and saw you holding a bag. “W-what are you doing?”

You walked away from him but he snatched your wrist to make you turn to face him. “Y/N! What’s going on?!” He frantically asked with crazed eyes. You snatched your wrist back and ran down the stairs and he copied your actions. He followed you into the living room until he grabbed your wrist once more. You tried to pull away again but found it harder because this time, he gripped it tight.

“W-where are you going baby?”

“Dont call me that.”

“What? Why? Baby, please tell me what’s going on.” He begged as he squeezed your wrist.

“What’s going on? Are you serious? What does it look like? I’m leaving!” Bakugou’s eyes went wide once more and shook his head.

“N-no! No, why!?”

“Why?! Look at my arm!” You screamed.

“I know! I know and I’m so sorry! But..but you don’t have to go! I can fix you up, I’ll take you to recovery girl, I will bring you to the best hospitals around the world to fix that for you! Just please don’t go!” He bargained and offered everything but you weren’t budging.

“It’s not just the burn Bakugou.” You deadpanned with a nonchalant face. His heart felt heavy after hearing your voice refer to him with his family name.

“..I-it’s Katsuki! Your Katsuki! It’s Suki, baby please!” Bakugou stepped closer as he cried once more but you backed away again. His hold on your wrist still strong as his fingers played with the ring on your hand, trying to calm himself down and remind himself that you are still his wife.

You shook your head at his pleading. “Bakugou. You burned me. But not only that, you’ve neglected me for months.”

“I know that! And I’m sorry! I will spend just as much time off of work to make it up to you, I swear I will, I promise!” He once again bargained.

“It’s too late.”

“No it’s not, please, it can’t be!”

“It is Bakugou-“

“KATSUKI! ....please...please don’t call me that. I’m your Katsuki,” he said with a whimpering voice. At this point you felt the tears come through, but you still didn’t allow them to fall.

“Katsuki...I can’t stay here. Too much damage has been done.” You said with a soft voice. Bakugou continued to shake his head ‘no,’ but you already made up your mind. You used your wind quirk in your hand and blew his grip off your wrist. You took the quick opportunity to walk to the door but Bakugou grabbed your bag off your shoulder in a childish panic and attempt to get you to stay.

“Hey!-“

“Please Y-Y/N! Please don’t leave me! I- I know I’ve been a terrible husband! I’m sorry! B-But I promise I’ll do better. I’ll stay at home more, I’ll spend more time with you, Please!”

“Katsu-“

“I’ll buy you whatever you want! I’ll get you all the expensive brands, I’ll find you all the best jewelry, I’ll give you all the money in the world! I’ll give you the whole world! Please stay! I love you so much Y/N!”

“Katsuki, give me back my bag,” you tried to reach for it but Bakugou kept it away from you and pulled you in with one arm and held you in a tight embrace as he cried on your shoulder.

“Please...you can’t do this to me. I need you. I love you! I’ll do better! I’ll be a better husband, I swear..just please don’t go.” He softly spoke with a broken voice and soft hiccups. It was wrong for you to do this, but you sighed and pretended to forgive him as you wrapped your arms around his torso. You hugged him tight and he fell for it as he openly sobbed now. His other arm that held your bag came to wrap around your waist but before it could, you snatched the bag out of his hold and pushed him away. You ran to the door and held a tight grip on the knob as you picked up your car keys. You saw Katsuki attempt to run back to you but you created a strong barrier of wind to protect you. “IM SORRY Y/N! PLEASE DONT!”

You took off your ring and tossed it to him through the barrier. He was quick to catch it and hold it right in fear of losing it. He had to find a way to get it back on your finger. “No..baby...Teddy Bear please!”

“....I’ll send you the divorce papers....Goodbye Katsuki.”

With that, you walked out of the door, still keeping the barrier alive. Once you started the car, you dispersed of the wind and Bakugou opened the door and ran to your car.

“Y/N wait! Please!” He cried out but he was too late. You pulled out of the driveway and drove off quickly down the street. He watched your car go as he began hyperventilating and tugging at his ash blonde locks. He ran back inside the house with your ring in hand as he looked for his phone. He found it on the kitchen island and quickly dialed your number. Of course, it went straight to voicemail but that didn’t stop him from calling about 50x more.

“This-...this has to be some stupid dream. A fucking nightmare...” he said as he tried to hide in denial. “Yeah...a nightmare. This is what it is...I’ll..I’ll wake up soon and she’ll be by my side in the morning...sleeping peacefully...and I’ll take the whole week off and spend it with her. She won’t be mad, we’ll be happy like we always are. S-She won’t leave me.”

Bakugou had an insane smile on his face with eyes of distraught on him. He clumsily made his way back to his bedroom where he flopped onto the large mattress and tried to get some sleep. He would sleep the whole day away if it meant you’d still be by his side when he woke up. The ring you abandoned was held tight in the palm of his hand as he held it close to his chest. His sobs overcame him but did aid in his journey to slumber. Eventually, he knocked out and a smile of bliss adorned his face as he assumed you would still be there in the morning.....oh how wrong he was.

The very next day, he woke up at 5:30 like he always did and quickly looked to your side of the bed. It was cold and empty. He was lonely. The exact same feeling you got everytime you woke up without seeing him for the past 6 months.

6 months. You’ve been married for 4 years and together for 8. Out of those 8 years, Bakugou spent 6 months neglecting you..and now...he lost you.

He stared at the empty space and bawled his eyes out like a baby as he screamed. He got out of bed and walked to the kitchen. Maybe you were cooking breakfast! You weren’t. Kitchen was empty. He ran to the living room! Maybe you were just watching some TV and reading a book, looking all cute and domesticated like you usually did. No, you weren’t there either. Bakugou checked every room in the house and when he couldn’t find you..he snapped.

His heart beated at a rapid pace as he trashed the entire house. Breaking windows, flipping desks, smashing furniture. He used his quirk to create blasts and burn marks into the walls and floors of the house. He did everything to get his frustrations out. The entire time he shouted and cried as rivers of tears flowed down his cheeks.

When he was done, he sat in the middle of the destroyed living room, laying his back against the flipped couch. He sat with his knees scrunched up as he hunched over, staring at the ground. His nose and eyes and basically his entire face grew puffy and red. His hair was a mess and so was he. Silent tears continued to drop, but his throat was too dry and hurt far too much for him to make anymore noise. However, he did fight through the pain to say one final thing:

“What have I done?”

A/N: hi cubsss! So a lot of you may know that my very first post, writing piece, and short story (He’s Lost) was created around angst, a breakup, and the fact that the triggering point was Bakugou physically hurting Y/N. I’ve been thinking about it and I HATE MY WRITING IN THE FIRST POST! It was terrible! Why tf did y’all like it so much?😭 And so, I’ve created a new piece revolving around the same elements, sorta as a way to check my progress. I hope you enjoyed!

ALSO!!! If you guys like this enough, I’m willing to turn it into a small yandere short story if you Cubs are down for that. Let me know and I’ll make it happen! Love you Cubs! See you next time🧸💗

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