#thanks for the ask! i had fun exploring the idea hehehe

[gianttol]

how big of a farm does Beth has?

Howdy :3

I'm verrrry bad at distances and measurements, but I'm a visual person. So I drew up a ROUGH size and layout for Beths farm.

Dark green - trees Light green - grass Pink - buildings (Beths house is the very bottom) Blue - lake She also has access to the fields off the right of this doodle, that's where Moomoo runs off to when she can. And the road at the bottom leads to the highway where she met Cherry.

[juunobox]

──★ ˙ ̟ helping nikolai put on his corset (nikolai gogol x gn! reader)

summary: he seems to struggle with tying a ribbon for the corset he's wearing and asks your help for it, he may or may not be actually struggling, though... warnings: mildly suggestive i suppose...? note: pretty short. i've been hit with writer's block due to being very busy irl as well i think, so this is just a sort of warm up >.>

Nikolai's frustrated groan echoed from the other side of the room, clearly exaggerated. He had been at it for a while—what exactly was he doing? Trying to properly wear a corset, the tied-up kind. For reasons known only to him, he decided to don a corset one day, injecting a change into his usual attire.

There was no special occasion; he simply had decided to spice up his usual outfit- which is an idea you're never opposed to. Of course, how could you? The idea of something tight accentuating the jester's toned physique was a sight you wouldn't want to miss.

Amid his effort to tie the corset properly, his exaggerated complaints reached a crescendo. "Ugh! This is so hard, [y/n]!" Nikolai complained, louder and needier than ever. His frustration appeared more like a theatrical performance than a genuine struggle. You suspected he could easily manage tying the corset ribbon, even at the back, thanks to the freedom of movement his ability provided.

So, it's beyond clear that he just wanted to playfully poke fun at you.

"Doveeeee!" he whined again, drawing out the syllable. This time, it finally prompted you to stand up from your seat and enter the bedroom where he was "struggling" with the corset.

"What is it, Kolya?" you asked with a small sigh, yet amused.

"I can't tie it right. Help me," he replied, a mischievous grin on his face whilst tugging at the ribbon as if beckoning you to come closer.

"But you're almost done," you remarked, your eyes drawn to his waist now accentuated by the black and white corset. You find it challenging to avert your gaze, lingering a moment longer than you'd care to confess. The corset accentuates his figure perfectly, with its well-fitted monochrome stripes hugging his torso. Your heart flutters with excitement at the way it snugly embraces him. The temptation to feel it beneath your fingertips almost overpowers you. You resist, reminding yourself, "All ribbons are tied... what else do you need?"

He giggled. "Hehehe! Yes, that's why now I need you to help me with this last bit. I can't tie a pretty ribbon," Nikolai voiced, directing your hands to firmly clasp his waist. An eyebrow arched in curiosity as he led your hands to his sides rather than the untied ribbon. When you attempted to withdraw your hands, Nikolai's grip only strengthened, ensuring not a single finger left his vicinity. You raised your chin to meet Nikolai's heterochromatic eyes, a slightly puzzled expression on your face as you encountered his smug grin.

"This..." you began, cheeks warming up as Nikolai leaned closer to your ear. "This is not where the ribbon is, Kolya," you stated, only eliciting an even more pronounced grin from Nikolai. His gloved hands secured your arms firmly, orchestrating their movements up and down his sides, a gentle caress accompanying each guided motion. Now, the earlier desire to feel his accentuated curves on your fingertips had become a reality. You revel in the growing excitement of this exchange, especially with him orchestrating every motion of your hands across his body like a puppet master. It's as if he possesses an innate knowledge of the precise areas on his body that you yearn to caress and explore...

"I'm aware, my prettiest dove. Very much so," he cooed, taking on a slightly deeper, yet still playful tone. "I've just been missing your touch," Nikolai deftly guided your hand to lightly squeeze his side waist, causing your eyes to widen at the unexpected gesture. At your flustered reaction, he only grinned and whispered, "And this is also something you've been wanting to do, right?"

An awkward silence momentarily enveloped both of you. "You beat me to it, Kolya," you admitted, confessing to the desires you'd harbored. Yes, being close to him like this was something you longed for.

He lingered in that close proximity a little longer before a faint giggle rolled off his lips. Finally releasing your hands, he twirled away with a toothy smile. "Well, too bad, you have to earn it! That was just a little taste of what you can get~ Hahaha!" The jester's continued to move afterwards, becoming a challenge for you to try and tie the ribbon securely.

"Come on, Nikolai, let's ensure this ribbon is tied properly!" you said, attempting to maintain composure despite the smile on your lips. Unfazed by your words, Nikolai continued- making you chuckle at his antics, well aware that his aim was to coax you into more physical contact. After a minute or so, the silver-haired clown finally relented, giving you the chance to actually adjust the corset ribbon while Nikolai held himself still, his gaze fixed on you with a wide smile.

"Okay, perfect now!" You finally announced with a hint of triumph as the ribbon was finally tied, acknowledging that his antics had made it a bit challenging for you. He straightened himself up dramatically, offering a mock princely bow. "Thank you. As expected of my dear assistant," he said, causing both of you to burst into giggles. Before you could move away, you suddenly feel his hand gripping your waist.

"Now hold on tight! We're going somewhere for the night. Can't let your effort in helping me put on this pretty corset go to waste!" Meeting his gaze upon hearing the sudden invitation, you asked, "Where are we off to, Kolya?" Nikolai flashed a mischievous grin. "That will be tonight's quiz! Hehehe—where am I taking you? Well, only one way to find out! Hold on tight, promise you it'll be a night to remember~" He holds you close to him, and in the blink of an eye, covered you both with his overcoat.

[toons-and-doom]

(This the response for @asilikesshit I accidentally deleted the ask- I think it was along the lines of like, a hypothetical real dandy world episode but it’s corrupted due to being in a tape for awhile, dandy’s world being lost media, and like- dandy transforming for the first time? )

Imagine if the episode starts out normal but as time progresses the episode gets weirder and weirder until it’s nearly unrecognizable (hehehe parallels to twisted go brrrrr)

Tbh I wanna eventually get around to exploring dandy’s world through a lost media thing. After gardenview closes, all the episodes are pulled off the air and all merch is discontinued. Since this is the early 2000s it’s not recorded well and now in the modern day very few peices of media exist including the toons-

Now Onto dandy

Cw for body horror, emetophobia, gore of the skin variety, and potentially bad writing I felt a lil snazzy and did this all in one day. Its also kinda rambley and there is NO planning plus im tired af

TLDR; It wasn’t fun to say the least. It was a little gross to

No 2nd reading or beta read either we die like the toon handlers probably did

Sorry if this is ooc, and dandy is fucked up when twisted in cannon when I finally design him I’m gonna try and make him make sense so he doesn’t right here

Anyways thank you to my pals on discord for giving me ideas

Now I can finally sleep

Enjoy :3

The first time it happened it hurt. It hurt like hell.

Dandy should have paid attention to how that off feeling had been building up the last few days. Maybe he should haven’t gotten so worked up about this whole ichor operation- Astro was gonna be quiet and none of the others knew. Not that he could help it. If he were to be caught the consequences would have been heavy- perhaps he would have gotten rewritten and redrawn entirely.

Maybe he should have been more cautious and not gotten some ichor onto himself.

Maybe he shouldn’t have then proceeded to continue on with his experiments with said ichor.

One second, dandy had been going back to his resting quarters, taking the long as to avoid any employees which still remain. The next, he’s suddenly doubled over on the floor, his hands having barely caught himself. He shivered. It was like he had been dunked in cold water, a feeling which only intensified as he inhaled shakily.

Dandy tried to will himself to get up, yet his limbs felt painfully stiff, uncoordinated. He gave up getting up when his hands nearly gave out and he’s almost sent face first into the floor. He initially wonders if he had come down with something, but something this intense doesn’t come on this suddenly.. unless-?

Something is pushing its way out up Dandy’s throat. It somehow both burns and freezes his insides. Now dandy’s wondering if it’s something he ate- food poisoning maybe? no, it can’t be that, the only thing he ate today was a cupcake sprout made. Sprout usually made edible food.

Dandy gagged as whatever his body was rejecting oh so violently finally began to choke him. His hands gave out, leaving himself only propped up by his elbows as he heaved. When that something finally did come out, thankfully it seemed to come out all at once. Something about it felt fundamentally wrong but dandy couldn’t exactly tell what- his body gasping for breath. Once dandy could begin to focus again would he begin to dare at whatever caused such a reaction and-

Oh.

Oh.

That wasn’t bile. Or food.

That was ichor.

He knew his little hobby was eventually going to catch up to him- but not this soon.

Dandy mustered the strength to pull himself away from the ichor, now he lied on his back. He knew far too well what pure ichor did to somebody. Just a little bit of it killed humans. It needed to be diluted to be safe for them. While toons like himself could get closer than a human ever could, it wasn’t a good idea.

Strange enough, the cold sensation is beginning to fade, but it’s rapidly being replaced by burning instead. Perhaps ichor brought fever along with it-?

Dandy is brought back to reality as his tongue brushed up against something sharp. A shakey hand comes up to his mouth, and he feels his teeth. In a second he withdrew his hand, a small cut leaking ichor onto the mitten like appendage.

Oh god.

What is he supposed to do-? He’s heard of toons who explode when exposed to pure ichor- is this a symptom you experience before exploding-?!

Think dandy- you can’t die right now- think!

Water. He needs to get water. Dilute the ichor inside him. Yeah. There’s gotta be a sink nearby- maybe if he’s sneaky he can pretend none of this happened!

With newfound determination, dandy pushed himself up onto his feet. Doing such a thing was near impossible considering how uncoordinated he is- and he had to hold onto the wall to stabilize himself. He looks to his right. The door wasn’t that far- he just needed to find water-

So he took a step.

And another

And another

Each step felt like he was walking on hot coals, and dandy couldn’t help but notice how difficult it was getting to remain upright. With each step the wall became more and more of a godsend. He couldn’t help but whine, he’s not used to this kind of pain at all. He tries to power through it as best he can, even as he notices how he seemed almost taller.

He could not ponder this, one misplaced step has sent him back to the ground. He was only barely able to shield his face from impact. He tried to get up once more, less out of determination and more out of a desperate attempt to survive. His legs simply did not cooperate with him, limp but not numb.

Dandy would have opted to crawl, but a morbid curiosity overtakes him. He turns his head, and he nearly wants to throw up.

He doesn’t think his feet are supposed to bend like that. He doesn’t think they are supposed to be that long either. His ankle isn’t supposed to be that high, nor his arch that long. While toons are naturally stretchy, dandy could feel his skin beginning to give way to the sudden growth, unable to adapt at such a rapid pace. He could begin to see a black coating underneath. He doesn’t think muscles look like that either.

The shape vaguely reminds him of a animal’s leg,

Dandy quickly turns his head around. Change in plans- he needs to find an employee. To hell with his plan of secrecy- he’d rather have at least a chance at living! He screams out for help, for anyone really, his handler, one of the employees, he’d even take up his chances with a janitor at this point.

His voice echos across the halls, and he doubts anyone hears him.

So now he crawls towards the door, though it is less crawling and more so just dragging his body against the cold tile floor. He could downright feel the skin throw thinner and thinner.

Snap!

Something slid off his foot.

Dandy already knew what it was. He was already shrieking- hands grasping onto his petals for any semblance of comfort. His hands could only remain on the petals for so long before even that became painful.

Focus. He needed to get help-

Thus, he dragged himself forward like a wounded animal escaping an inevitable fate. The door was so close now- he just needs muster the willpower to get up and reach-

It was only now dandy is beginning to realize the sorry state of his hands. His thumbs were slowly being shriveled up to the point of being absolutely useless. He could feel something lurking just under the flesh of his hands- not like the ichor which coats his body under his skin. It does not stretch his skin until it snaps, rather, it slices through the skin rather effortlessly- a much more merciful agony but still agony nonetheless.

…

Dandy now has three sharp digits on each hand, slowly twitching as he holds one hand up to his face. Each digit represents a color of the rainbow, like his petals…

Maybe dandy would have found it cute if he didn’t feel like he was dying.

… at least now that’s the worst of his problems. The pain from his feel was beginning to subside, and he could tolerate the horrors his hands are undergoing, he might be fine if he can just-

…

it’s like he’s getting too large for his skin. All at once, it’s like he’s tripled in size. The strain is far too much to bear- and dandy is completely lost in the agony and haze beginning to engulf him.

Bones shatter. Skin tears like ribbons

Dandy’s very likeness, torn to shreds, a monster left in its place.

He wants to wake up. He wants to hug pebbles tightly right now. He wants to see the others- he wants to see Astro-

But no. This is his punishment by some sick god.

By the time it is over, dandy does not have the strength to continue, and collapses.

…

The monster comes to, and it quickly gets on its feet. The fluorescents above it hurt its red eyes, and it squints. It appears to be in a hallway of some sort. How it got there does not matter to it.

Not much matters to it. Besides a simple instruction; kill those not like it.

And thank god it can hear someone coming.

~~~

He’s okay guys he’ll learn how to change himself back and learn how to be conscious during the whole thing.

Now I can finally rest

[bisexualmcqueen]

I had a few questions about your apocalypse au!!

Are there any definite relationships? what happened to Sally and the rest of the townsfolk? And do any of the current characters that are alive die later on?

😈hehehe apocalypse au

so the first thing to know is that apoc au falls in line with my longstanding polyam bi salqueen hc. they are both in multiple healthy consenting relationships with different dynamics. fran/sal/queen is a thing, mchicks is a thing, etc. theyre all queer and all respectful mature adults, they have a lot of love to give, and theyre having a lot of fun!

-What happened to Sally?

in apoc au tho, sally dies very sadly early on. she survives the blast initially and is coherent enough to say her goodbyes, but her injuries take her within a week or so. 996's have an infamous catostrophic engine failure point and are notorious for blowing up, so her odds werent great. with the entire planet in chaos, its hard to help survivors at all...

-Are there any definite relationships?

the main relationship of apoc au winds up being... lightning/chick. yep. chick is visiting his old 'pal' in radiator springs (lightning and cruz stopped home for some rare downtime during the busy season) when it all goes to hell. everyone dies, and 1 billion metric tons of trauma later, chick and lightning accidentally wind up codependent. (cant blame them!).

so far, lightning has 2 other relationships in apoc au. jackson survives, and decides to not sit on his longtime crush on lightning anymore on account of the world being massively fucked up, and confesses his feelings. i also have an oc in development, a medic named Dr. Amiyah Sparkwright who shares feelings with lightning also. both of them dont appear til later in the story, after the characters start to rebuild. all of them are too traumatized to be super serious though... the angst ;,,)

-What happened to the rest of the townfolk?

the rest of the townfolk died pretty much instantly, save for mack, who also died slower. i guess its sort of like a thanos snap? except the bodies dont vanish. chick, lightning, and cruz bury them when they realize no one is coming to save anyone.

-Do any of the main survivors die later?

and do any of the main cast die... spoilers!! but yes, chick dies about 15-20 years in. initially, in the early-early drafts back in 2019ish, chick died only a few years in. changing this and adding him to the main party has shifted everything- his chaos-loving spirit, tricky resourcefulness, and boundless rude comedy are exactly what the story needed. combine that with the pacifist/optimist cruz and the endlessly loving determination and charm of lightning, and its an incredibly fun dynamic. that, and they're all hardened survivors now- big changes happen to these characters, and part of the fun is exploring that (or, how theyve stayed the same despite the changed world!).

to be fair to chick, hes like, 70 by the time he dies, so he does pretty well. Non has a list of ideas on how chick goes, and i love them all too much to decide, tho i am a big fan of him being murdered on a failed supply run. a few other minor characters will also die, oc's and canon. and i havent decided what happens to cruz and lightning yet, i'm not sure if it matters, they may live to old age!

very excellent specific questions- hope this answers them. thanks for the ask!

[ice-cream-writes-stuff]

♡♡Mother Mother Monster!♡♡

《Mother: A parental being known to take care their young.》

《Gojo Satoru/Yandere! Reader》

-

[Warnings: Yandere!Reader Also, I don't condone these actions. This was purely for fun and such. If uncomfortable, please don't read. DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT]

-

"You old hag, get away from me!"

"Gramps!"

"Grandfather please settle down.."

"Don't call me that, witch!"

A young woman sighs at the older man as she fixes up the tea she made for him. Picking up the morning newspaper in hand as she sets the tea and paper on a small table. The older Itadori scowls, put picks up the tea and paper. Grumbling about how it's to sweet for his taste.

The younger Itadori smiles at his grandpa, sitting next to him on the floor. Digging into the tasty snack that his mother had prepared. "Go sit at the table boy!" Yuji stubbornly shook his head. "No, I wanna eat with you Gramps!"

The boy smiled happily, as a hand leand down to wipe off the crumbs from his chubby face.

"Yuji, don't talk with your mouthful. You'll choke." A tender voice said from beside them. The pink haired boy nods his head. "Sorry mom.." "No worries sweetie! Don't forget to drink your juice."

Wasuke frowns. "Don't drink it Yuji, she'll poison you."

"Pffbbbffttt-!"

The old man laughs at his grandson gullibleness, yet his laughter ceased when the little tyke starts to tear up. "Grandfather! That wasn't nice!" (Y/N) said, holding Yuji close as she wipes the juice off the boys face.

"You can't blame me for thinking that, I know how you were with Jin back in high-school."

(Y/N) frowns at Wasuke, knowing what he was getting at. "Mom poisoned dad before?" Yuji asked with childish wonder in his tone.

"A-ah, um, no sweetie... You see, mommy poisoned her classmates to make sure your daddy would be all to herself."

"Why?"

"Because, your mommy loved daddy very much..."

"Why?"

"Because she's insane." Wasuke informed the little boy, glaring at the so-called "mother".

"Why?" Yuji asked a third time, which made the old man sigh, exasperated at his idiotic grandson.

(Y/N) smiles softly, patting Yuji's head with sadness. "Love makes people do... Bad things, for the people they love, sweetie."

-

(Y/N) watches as Yuji silently cries to himself over the death of his grandfather. Her maternal instincts urging her cry with him, even if she couldn't. So all she do to console the young teen was to pat his back. Rubbing it soothingly to calm him. Yet her son's grieving stopped once another teen approached them.

-

"YUJI...!" (Y/N) screams, watching the man in the blindfold make her son sleep. Pushing the roof door open, she pulls out a steak knife from her back pocket, ready to stab this man to death.

Before she could land a hit, the man noticed her presence. Frowning at the man, she rushes at him. Making him drop Yuji as he slyly dodges her slashes.

"My my~! I didn't know there was a lady here. I would of showed off more!"

(Y/N) smiles at the man, which confused Gojo as she changes tactics. This time throwing her purse at him as he catches. Which had a good weak point for a good cut!

Smiling maniacally, she raised her knife to land a hit on his stomach-!

But was immediately put into a chokehold with one of his hands.

Feeling her breathing coming out in puffs. She doesn't let go of her knife, struggling in his grip.

"Heheh~"

Gritting her teeth she kicks her leg up managed to kick him back as she held her weapon defensively.

Looking at the young boy who had led her and her son to the school. Then at his supposed "teacher".

-

[In celebration for Jujitsu Kaisen 2nd season! (I HONESTLY HAVE OLD YUUTA FIC FROM MOVIE 0 BUT DIDN'T POST OOP) I decided to do a small thing! Originally, this was posted for the idea of a full Jjk fic, but.. Other Fandom get in the way! Oops, but who knows! Maybe I'll explore the idea more later! Thanks for reading! Comment appreciated!]

[justalilguyoops]

What made you think about writing LAWS in the reverse perspective? Felix being obsessive and Ollie being....less

omg.....this is such a good question!!!! hello anon and thank you for this hehehe

okay so I'm pretty sure i had a eureka, light bulb over the head moment but I don't remember what or when exactly it was

BUT! there were a few things that led up to it! I wasn't originally planning on doing another fic and definitely not a long fic, but idk i think i was possessed probably

one of the things that made me go "huh. interesting idea" was reading a post on tumblr about how Felix probably thinks he's in a romcom, how his party outfit is reminiscent of Baz Luhrmann's Juliet in R&J. So that got me thinking about the film from Felix's perspective.

Another thing that also caught my attention is how much this fandom (and me) eats up an obsessive/possessive/jealous lil bitch Felix. I also think there's proof in the film that Felix IS possessive over Oliver.

Barry Keoghan's rizz was also another factor. I can't remember what video or what really triggered it, but I thinkkkk maybe his Hot Ones interview? But I think there was another video way before that too that gave me the initial idea, since I think LAWS originally sprouted in my brain like....20 chapters before WIPIP ended.

I was just like "wow....his power...." and I do think Oliver had like a bit of his charisma, but...what if....i dialed it up to Barry Keoghan's innate level? what if oliver had that goin awn?

I also came up with the line in chapter 7, where Oliver asks if Vee is pretty and when Felix gets defensive and asks why, oliver just responds with "Figured. Y’know, because you are."

i wanted....to use that....so badly once my brain produced it

Oxford days of the film also particularly captivated me, mainly the moments of the montage. The guitar scene was a HUGE contributing factor for me wanting to write LAWS in Oxford days.

why did I do LAWS in modern day?

Primarily because I wanted Felix to vape. truly. that was like the main reason.

Along with just a generally more accepting culture of LGBTQIA+, cellphones, and social media. I wanted to make all of them even worse by giving them access to tiktok <3

So, more or less, I did want to write LAWS as a college romcom, something much lighter and totally different from WIPIP.

I wanted to do it from Felix's POV because WIPIP was more predominantly Oliver (despite switching POV each chapter; it was still very much Oliver's story and we all tended to view the story as a whole from his POV).

The reversal of role was motivated by Felix being the possessive one first!!! This was a SUPER long answer and I'm going to include a bit more beneath this, but warning: It contains spoilers for PART ONE of LAWS!

DON'T READ BELOW IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED LAWS PART ONE!

------

I was also just really interested in exploring the Quick family. In the film, we view them as kind people who care about their son, which y'know, makes oliver look terrible for his lies.

HOWEVER! There has to be a reason that Oliver is what he is. Obviously, people develop individuality on their own and not everything is a product of nurture vs. nature, but I do believe that there's something to that. Parts of us can be a product of our environment.

Also, if you've read my past writing, you know I really enjoy religious themes, specifically Christianity.

Fun fact, but I am and have been atheist my whole life, my whole family is. I've never attended a church service.

BUT i am extremely fascinated by it (which def reflects in my writing lol) and enjoy exploring all the ideas, stories, and culture. I did notice in the film that Paula wears a cross necklace, which kinda indicates that they are religious in some variation.

What if the Quicks always knew that Oliver was bisexual? What if they never spoke of it? Oliver, always on his own at school. Never had any friends. Why were his parents OKAY with that?

Personally, if my parents noticed something like that they'd want to have a conversation with me or my school: was I being bullied? were there any issues on the playground? why did I not have any friends?

Instead, Paula uses excuses of him being "so clever", kind of brushing off her son's loneliness? idk, they very clearly love their son, but there are some little indications that Oliver struggled in his youth and his parents never really addressed it? (obviously all of this is just a theory and think i've kinda come up with)

SOOOOO i wanted to investigate that in modern day. The kind of outdated and conservative ideals of a religious family and their bisexual son. (of course still happens all over the world, but in my personal life I feel like I don't hear about this experience as often. I live on the west coast of the USA which I think is a contributing factor)

AND I WANT TO SAY I hope that my stories and references to religion are never harmful to those that are religious. I try hard to be respectful and honest with information.

I find religions to be super interesting and never intend to be insensitive! I try to do a lot of research, but obviously as someone kinda standing outside and looking in, I may get things wrong.

I don't intend for LAWS to be disrespectful towards Christianity; I'm merely trying to write a story about what has and is happening to many LGBTQIA+ youths in strict religious households. I know of many religious families that unequivocally love their queer children, but there's always the other side of the coin.

anyways!!! longest answer ever!!! sorry for this word vomit!!! and thank you again for such a wonderful question hehe

[anulithots]

Because you love storytelling, what are your top 5 fav (fictional) books ever? Do you love live- stage drama? Oh, and do you love fairy tales like Andersen, Grimms, etc? If you are, what are your top 5 fav fairy tales?

As I read your blog, I can tell that you love story telling and story as a whole (sorry if it's kinda weird to say). Love your blog so much 🥰💐

Awww thank you!

I dooo like storytelling, it's my solace and comfort place and how my little neurodivergent self processes the world.

Top 5 favorite fictional books:

The Little Prince. The movie fundamentally shaped my childhood, and the book shapes me now. It's such a beautiful story and I've quoted it... quite a few times 😅

Six of Crows. I looove all the characters, their dynamics, the growth they have and how they fit into the larger world. The way all character dynamics and backstories are explored is soooo well done. It's 'be gays, do crimes' in a book and I love it so much,

The wild robot (is it obvious now I used to read a lot of middle grade and never reaaalllyy got into young adult - I've been reading lots of fanfic - so now I'm trying to find a new genre to like.) It's the sweetest little found family between a robot and a gosling ever.

Sherlock Holmes (not finished yet). I've only read a bit so far. THe main duo of Sherlock Holmes and Watson are so fun to read. Their banter, Sherlock's willingness to do crimes and Watson wanting to go along with it because he finds Sherlock interesting. Sherlock Holmes himself being so adhd core. He accidentally became the best man at a wedding for the people he was trying to spy on. It's peak fiction.

(The BBC show had very good characters and character dynamics, but the mystery was kinda... lackluster to be honest)

Blind Trust by @goodluckclove. Such a comfort read, all the characters and dynamics are thoroughly explored. And everyone deserves hugs and happiness. It feels like reading a slice of life show mixed with the saddest backstories and well done emotional writing and akjsdfkl. It was so fun and comforting to read.

Honorable mentions I'll have to reread: Howl's Moving Castle, The Hunger Games (my tbr list got messed around), Heaven Official's blessing.

TBR list: haikyuu, sherlock holmes, The picture of dorian gray, Six of Crows duology, Heaven Official's blessing, The Hunger Games, Omniscient reader's viewpoint.

ALSO ALSO. If anyone ever has recommendations for books that are commentaries with lots of deep contemplation and explorations of themes of some sorts... the ones that sit with you afterwards and make you look at the world in a new way.... I'm alwayyys open to recommendations.

Do you love live- stage drama?

I've only seen one😅. I don't remember what it was called. One of those classic desi ones. Ended tragically and such. I've never gotten into it, but I think I'd like it if I ever did! Maybe when I have ✨ le independence✨ I'll see some. I'm always open to suggestions in my inbox!

Oh, and do you love fairy tales like Andersen, Grimms, etc? If you are, what are your top 5 fav fairy tales?

I've never read any, but I did have a phase where I was interested in them. I watched and read lots and lots of summaries.

I liked the little mermaid one. The ending tragedy sat with little me for a while. The idea that her sisters cared enough to give her the option of her old life at the expense of the prince, that she loved him so much - even if it was unrequited - that she'd rather sacrifice herself... the moral dilemmaasss klajflkasdf. (Also the queer allegories heheh)

The Rapunzel one also was nice... I've heard lots of versions and such.

Um kajdfk I don't remember everythinggg. But they were dark and I loved how dark they were. Since they were 'fairy tales for children' it's pretty much the first dark thing I was exposed to. I honestly love dark things for that weight they add to stories and my fairy tale phase probably played a major part in that.

Thank you so much for the ask!

[lemonlyman-dotcom]

5 and 12 please! :)

Hello friend!! Thank you!! ��

5. Favorite platonic pairing?

Hehehe you already know it’s TK & Marjan!! I touched on this a bit in a previous ask, but I also really love Carlos & Marjan. I explored this a lot in love in a series of bursts & inches and also I'm Not A Fortress, But I Will Try To Protect You, but I think they have so much in common. They come from different cultures, but I think they have a lot of similar experiences with their families and cultural expectations that they maybe feel like they’ve failed to live up to and had to really reckon with that in their own ways. I love the idea of Carlos being someone that Marjan can talk to about trying to make a bad match work as their way of appeasing their parents, and what it felt like to find the right person and then feel scared of introducing them to their parents. I think Carlos probably told Marjan about how much he regrets that time he lost with his parents, and how he wishes he’d introduced TK to them on his own terms. (You can find this very conversation in chapter 5 of love in a series of bursts & inches!!)

12. Craziest thing you've ever done as part of a fandom?

Hmm well probably organizing the fandom-wide rewatch!! It’s been really really fun and I’ve made so many new friends and I hope to continue to do so!!!

Fandom ask game

[aimlesspixel]

Chapter 3 of Isat Scintillation

I'm not super confident in my writing for Mirabelle in this chapter so please let me know if there are any aspects of her character I may have missed or should keep in mind. Thank You!

Isabeau - "I've got some shopping to do so I'll meet you all back here at sundown!" Odile - "I'm off to go get us some lodging."

Bonnie is already gone by the time you look back presumably off to explore the town maybe something else.

Mirabelle - "Well that just leaves us! Wanna explore the town together?"

Sure you had to go pretty quickly when you were saving Vauguard together so just exploring sounds quite nice. "It sounds like a fun time Mira." You say with a small smile.

The town is quite lively for just coming back from the end of the country, then again Vauguard is the country of change. Lots of people are moving about cleaning up any damage left behind by the sadness' and freezing. It makes it all the more surprising that the shops and such are open already Mirabelle's eyes lock on one in particular.

Mirabelle - "Oooh! Let's go in this one! I used to shop here all the time before the king came!"

You give a slight nod of agreement and Mira leads you inside. It's a bookstore and the door makes little ding ding on entry.

Mirabelle - "Ding ding hehehe." "Oh is that housemaiden Mirabelle back in my shop? It's been quite a while hasn't it?" Mirabelle - "It has ma'am." she says with a smile "Me and Siffrin will be looking around though I do have a quick question before we do." Shopkeep - "Would you happen to be looking for that final issue of the Cursing of Chateau Castle?" Mirabelle - "If you have a copy on hand I'd love to pick it up! Oh, but I actually wanted to ask if you have any empty familytales on hand." Shopkeep - "Of course but why are you looking for one if you don't mind an old lady prying. Don't you have one already or are you getting bonded?" Mirabelle - "Oh! I -I don't mind Ma'am. I-It's not for me. It's for one of my traveling partners Odile."

You all discussed a bunch of different things while traveling and decided to get Odile a familytale to keep since she doesn't have one yet and you're all family. You remember remarking at the the time that the idea was quite Novel, much to the bemusement and chagrin of your family present there.

Shopkeep - "Ooh alright dearie it's a shame it's not your time yet but it's best to take your time while you can. Change knows I did."

While the shopkeep gets the items Mira asked for you look around. Mira recommends some of her favorite horror stories when one book in particular catches your eye. A particularly dusty novel written in a language that can actually cause headaches.

[You have equipped Memory of Memories] It's been a minuet since you've remembered this but you could never let it go not after all it took to get it. You open the book, It's a collection of recipes from various parts of the world including your home.

Mirabelle - "Ooh what do you have there Siffrin?" She peers at the book curiously. Siffrin - "It's a recipe book! It has some that I'd like to ask Bonnie to make." You can feel some excitement in your chest, you may not be able to remember it but you can experience some of what you used to have right? It may be a little iffy if the universe will let you without any headaches or side effects but…

wait a minute.

You look back at Mira eyeing your novel curiously. "Is something wrong Siffrin?" Siffrin - "Are you not getting a headache right now Mira?" Mirabelle - "No, I don't know that language so I wouldn't try to read it in the first place though it looks like you're having no trouble so-"

WHAT HOLD ON WAIT HOLD ON A SECOND

Siffrin - "Wait wait wait wait wait. You're not getting a headache right now Mira? Positive? Absolutely???" Mirabelle - "Yes??? Why would I????"

No way No way No way what. How is this possible shouldn't-

Mirabelle grabs your shoulder lightly - "Sorry but, are you ok? You're shaking do you want to breathe with me?"

You didn't even notice in your hope and disbelief but you're shaking from excitement. You don't know how or why this is possible or what's even going on but you should calm down first. This is huge if it's what you think it is. You nod your head.

Mirabelle - "Okay with me In…"

She waits a few moments

Mirabelle - "And out…"

You repeat this until you are sufficiently calmed down.

Mirabelle - "Okay are you felling better now?" Siffrin - "Yes, thank you Mira." She smiles - "It's what we're here for. Wanna talk about it?"

Definitely you absolutely want to discuss this with everyone. "Absolutely though I'll save it for when we get back to the Inn alright?"

Mirabelle looks at you with some concern in her eyes but agrees.

You add the book to the purchases you're making and as the shopkeeper couldn't recall the price she was selling it at she let you take it as a gift to the Saviors of Vauguard.

[sleepis4theweak]

FLASHBACK AU QUESTIONS, YOU SAY? FLASHBACK AU QUESTIONS YOU SHALL RECEIVE (Or at least somewhat related to the au questions...)!!

How did you originally come up with the story? Have you planned it out? Have you made any changes since you first thought of it?

What's your fav Mikey dynamic? Do you think it shows in the comic? My personal fav is PB & J duo :>>

Who's your least favorite character in the comic to draw?

Who's your favorite character to draw?

Where did Madame Bishop (I forgot her name- she had one didn't she?..was it Joanne? MAN I HAVE AMNESIA) get that scar from?

IS... IS MIKEY GONNA STAY DEAD...? 😰

Can we have a sneak peek by any chance? :3

What do you think Madame Bishop (...yeah might be Joanne...) would have been like in the doomed timeline?

ALRIGHT THAT'S ALL I CAN THINK OF, I'LL LEAVE YOU OFF WITH A PUN : Have you heard of the theory that no two people see color the same? I guess that would mean color is just a pigment of our imagination 🤔

YAYYAYAYAYYA THANK YOU I GOT VERY EXCITED TO ANSWER THESE YAY!

ANYWHO LONG ANSWERS BUT:

1- This was honestly supposed to be a two part comic. The entire au is based off of experiences I have had (minus the whole dying part of course) with my cousins and or brother. The first part was about Donnie and Mikey- and Mikey having the puppy dog eyes that Donnie couldn't do. That was about my cousin! It was supposed to just be like oh look Mikey can do puppy eyes. And then I saw something about how kids that struggle with understanding emotions can practice expressions in the mirror sometimes* and was like haha I should add this since it's actually something I used to do as well! THEN I wrote the line about him wanting to be the youngest and I mean... my brain went straight to "now what if Mikey dies"...

I didn't expect people to like it as much as they did tbh... so when people started to really comment on it I was like okay I should bring Mikey back to life... But then it turned into a whole au...

It's almost entirely planned out now! And most comics are still based off of stories of things that have happened with my cousins or brother! (Like how I smashed my cousins legos because I was angry at him.... its a long story lol).

*(It can also be something that kids with autism do... and someone actually pointed it out! ->)

-----------

2- Thats a really hard one... I think my fav has to do with the situation I guess? Or how I'm feeling? But Donnie and Mikey are probably my favorite overall! But only by a teensy tiny bit.

Raph and Mikey are my favorite angst wise, and the ones I can relate to the most. Leo and Mikey are really fun, and I really like using it to explore responsibility.

I think it does show in the comic! I mean I went straight to the PB & J duo- and then with Leo and Mikey I really explored responsibility. With Raph and Mikey it was shorter, but it was a lot more emotional for me personally. And right now Raph and Mikey are really getting the spotlight. Though Leo and Mikey are the main ones in the next update! :)

-----

3- DONNIE. OMFG DONNIE IS SO RECTANGULAR AND ITS TERRIBLE. ITS WHY HE'S HANGING HALF IN HALF OUT OF A LOT OF FRAMES BECAUSE I HATE DRAWING HIM. I've definitely gotten better at him tho! Example for u ->

-----

4- I think Leo is the easiest to draw, with Mikey coming in second! My favorite to draw though is definitely Mikey. I like his mask tails :) Also he's my favorite in general hehehe

-----

5- LMAO I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE THE NAME JOANNE CAME FROM IM LAUGHING SO HARD- THATS HER CANNON NAME NOW. ITS CANNON HER NAME IS DR. JOANNE BISHOP.

She got that scar from an experiment! Idk which one... but she was experimenting on something and it freaked and scratched her! :3

It isn't too important to the story, but it may add some depth/explanation to some of her reactions later on.

-----

6- ... lemme tell you, I have gotten this ask so many times... BUT CONGRATS I WONT DELETE THE ASK THIS TIME JUST FOR YOU <3

Usually I answer the ask, wait until I'm sure the person sending it saw my response and delete it to keep the mystery alive hehe... but I won't delete this one.

No. Mikey is not gonna stay dead. I mentioned it in the first one, but the comic was supposed to end with him maybe dead maybe not... but since the au is continuing... I don't like it when characters die :( Its sad so he was never gonna be actually dead. So yes, he will come back! Its just gonna take a bit...

------

7- YOU MAY! I was considering which spoiler to give you... but I've decided to give you a big spoiler... just cropped. :) Because I'm evil like that :))

-----

8- Hmmm.... idk to be honest, I haven't thought about it... I think she would be just... even crazier. Like batshit insane.

-----

THAT PUN MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD- THANK YOU FOR THAT AND THANK YOU FOR THIS ASK IT MADE MY DAY <3

[stormseclipse]

sorry i ask so many questions (im tryna space em out) but i have a few more imma just compile here like last time and these are the last for today 1. what are your ships? 2. (dunno if i already asked this) what would the storm hawks be like evil? 3. whats your opinion on the other skyknight squads and which ones your fav?

Lol, no worries!

1. Hehehe well I have my OTP, EclipsexAerrow which is my ocxcanon ship. I’ve had it since the show started and I love them so much <3 I also have FinnxRory which I mentioned before in another answer. That one’s a little more recent, like 3 years now. Came about as a funny idea but now I’m very fond of their dynamic and story.

I guess I also have a Dark Ace ship? AcexFletcher, he’s another oc of mine that shows up in the epilogue. Might talk about them more at some point.

I think that’s about it for ships I actively write for.

2. Hmm this is a fun question, I’ll try to keep it brief though. Aerrow’s VERY fun to think about in an evil au, I technically already designed him, but you’ll have to dig around in my blog to find it lol. He’s still cocky and fearless but a little more ruthless too. A little more mean and selfish. Basically just the opposite of who he normally is.

Finn’s already self absorbed but now he’s more so. Thinks he deserves everything and isn’t afraid to just take it. Greedy and more of a jerk.

Piper’s a bitch, lol. Stuck up and thinks she’s smarter than everyone. Would be more like Cyclonis I think, in that, she doesn’t care about how she treats others and would experiment on people and animals if it meant finding some scientific discovery.

Stork keeps some of his quirks, but instead of being actively evil, he more just keeps to the shadows and doesn’t like to interact with people. He knows 45 different ways to kill someone though, thanks to all the books he reads.

Junko…I guess this would just be the au where he doesn’t leave the youth brigade and fully joins Cyclonia. He’d also be the opposite of who he normally is. Just mean and angry and intimidating. A bully.

Radarr would bite and scratch people, be a little menace. Laughs at people’s misery and just causes a lot of chaos and destruction.

3. I wish we got to spend more time with the other squadrons!! Like the Screaming Queens are such a mystery to me and I wanna know more about them. As for a favorite though… I guess the Rex Guardians? Mostly because I love writing for Harrier, he’s such an interesting character. He’s a whiny, stuck up rich kid who’s never been told no. That’s so fun. Also Terra Rex seems like a cool place to explore, I wanna know why they’re one of the richer terras and why Harrier’s a Sky Knight when he hardly does anything.

I could keep going but this answer is long enough XD

[fastcardotmp3]

For the ask game!!

62 - Thoughts on cliffhangers?

76 - Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of Metamorphoses? 

ooh!! love these thank you anon <3

✨fic asks✨

62. Thoughts on cliffhangers?

I think from a fic writing perspective and the sort of inherent episodic nature of watching a story get written in real time, there is something particularly fun about a cliffhanger. As a reader you get to meltdown about it to the actual writer's face??? hell yeah?? and as an author you get to talk to real actual people anxious for closure while you're still actively writing the closure??? it's so DELICIOUS. And from a more general storytelling perspective, I really do think it's just like any other narrative device, right? Like any trope you use can be used to both your advantage and your disadvantage as a writer, and half the battle is being able to tell which direction it'll go. I love a well-timed cliff-hanger mid-series, something that makes me really think about where the story is going and what all the different outcomes might mean for my favorite characters, but there are also instances where it just doesn't work. Like I've talked about Hopper's non-death before, but that button where we find out he's alive but not where or how? That's a cliffhanger. And it's a bad one. Because in a case like that the closure of Hopper's death was more deeply impactful than some vague "oooh he's still alive hehehe" could ever be. The closure is thought provoking about character and plot and where do we go from here whereas the cliffhanger is just sort of. anti-climactic. makes everything we just went through feel pointless. you know? The short answer could have been "it depends" here but when have I ever shut up in my life....

76. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of Metamorphoses? 

Oh, for sure! I can't remember everything I ended up passing on but I can give you a couple! One was that I wanted to go more in-depth about the people Kas actually killed. I had a whole plotline in my head about how during the time he was in the UD before the Final Battle, the Feds sent down soldiers to get eyes on the place and it was Kas's job to take them out, thus forcing Eddie to have actual, literal life blood on his hands. Forcing him to know what it feels like to break a human person's neck or rip out his jugular or whatever. I ultimately scrapped it and left it vague because I simply didn't have time within the story to give him one more thing to cope with, but I think maybe it's a story/ universe all its own worth exploring one day. And the second is that I wanted to write a single chapter from Steve's POV, right after Eddie turns himself in to Owens and disappears. I wanted to see the fallout from the other side, the questions about whether Eddie was dead or captured or hurt etc etc. Giving El's comment about "Steve yells now" a proper standing in the story and stuff, you know? The more I thought about it though the more it fucked with the pacing and would've kept us in the Lab for too many consecutive chapters, but I still think about writing it as a standalone sometimes if that would be something anyone would want!

[late-cambrian]

FOR THE AO3 WRAPPED hello !!!!!

3, 6, 12, 18, 19 and 28? i'm being selfish picking tons of questions alksdfjklsjdfk

AHHHH HELLO

first, everyone go read kae's works rn >:( fr find me a better writer, i'll wait

3) What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)

unfortunate for my blue lock besties, but it's a naruto fic lmao. I really enjoyed writing quartz arenite, which is one of my only serious fics. It's a Gaara character study with some background world-building I feel like the show doesn't actually give us about Suna. It also has GaaLee, obviously, because it had to.

6) Favorite title you used

oh geez. I'm gonna have to pick two. for naruto, Bombing Sex-Ed because I think it's so silly. for blue lock, propbably Hotel, Motel, Holiday Inn. I mean, c'mon, Pitbull.

12) How many WIPs do you have in your docs for next year?

oh DOUBLE geez, I currently have 25 drafts in my folder for blue lock alone. I'm hoping to have at least one Christmas fic for Loser Gate out before the end of the year hehehe.

18) The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

hmmm, probably a tie between Rin and Ness. I really like BachiRin, but their dynamic has been tough for me to write because I feel like Rin is difficult for me to write in character lol. Ness is just OOC, and I have a hard time capturing his, how do you say, crazy-insane Isagi-flavored hate. I just want him to be silly, and the way he simps for kaiser in canon makes me say ness bb girl get off your knees. i write him how i want to (which is correct, i know him better than the author).

19) What's one pairing you want to explore next year?

RAHHHH THIS QUESTION!!!! I really want to dip into Otoya/Karasu/Yukimiya tbh. My roots are haikyuu poly-flavored, and I loooove a throuple. I love their dynamic, and I want to write more Karasu tbfh lol. I also want to write some bachisagi and ness/kurona! I have so many ideas swimming around :)

28) Favorite work you wrote this year?

for naruto, still quartz arenite. super proud of that one <3. For Blue Lock, tbh I really enjoyed writing both Monster Mash and Smash or Pass. smash or pass came to me so fast lol. i loved that chapter, and i knew that i wanted to make it a part of loser gate. i had a blast reading kaisagi authors interpret what they'd do about it in general. big win for kaisagi nation. Monster Mash was super hard to write bc.I suck at world-building, but it was really fun to write and I got to write SaeShidou, which is always a win for me.

thank you for the ask, @kae-karo <3. i love talking about more stuff so it's not selfish, and tbh, would die for u. fr everyone do yourself a favor and check out their works!

[iyliss]

yuma for the ask meme! :^)

heheh thank uuu returning to the zexal roots

First impression: "protagonist kinda buddy" i don't think ive ever had proper thoughts about him? beside that he's fun. I feel like he's one of these characters I came to truely appreciate after some years. I was like 16 when I watched zexal ? So he was just a protag to me, but now that I properly witness that oh my god he's 13 it changes everything.

Impression now: OMG HE'S SUCH A FUN GUY god i love his teen boy who clearly struggles but also wants to have fun mood. I particularly love his earlier immaturity. The way he can be soo prideful sometimes is so much fun and he just?? feels like such a genuine character?? He has his stupid moment, but also many heartfelt and understanding episodes where it shows he's not all that immature. Maybe I like zexal I more in that regard, it showed more yuma moment variety.

Favorite moment: the very, very early astral-yuma dynamic is incredible and they have so many just... fun moments. Especially the reverse psychology moment. That boy does NOT want to be told what to do (and it's so much fun).

Idea for a story: haven't had zexal fic/AU ideas in like. forever. (except for yagumo but he's special) but i still often ends up having sci-fi AU for him. cheesy space adventure stuff, mech stuff, exploring foreign planets.... i just think he works so nice in a weird and colorful distant space setting. The comical protagonist that gets very intense sometimes. Also in old school-y space suits.

Unpopular opinion: I legit don't like stories that force angst him too badly. Overall I am not a huge protagonist angst liker for more or less reasonable reasons, but Yuma has specific recurring elements in fanworks that I just don't like. By that I mean stuff that use don thousand only as an angst determinator for Yuma. MAYBE don thousand is one of the most beautiful and hot and impressive yugioh character to me and seeing him reduce to "make the hero sad" isn't very fun. And like overall main characters don't have to suffer to be interesting and antagonist aren't limited to their effect on the main character.

Favorite relationship: Yeah so i really like astral/yuma mostly because I love Astral (my autism alien!!!!!!) and his dynamic with Yuma is SO MUCH FUN and i don't really like this kind of "boy find a mysterious girl (it's usually a girl) and ends up sacrificing everything for her" type story but they truely manage to build up their bond. It doesn't come out of nowhere, it isn't a linear progress, it's not always perfect... And their affection at the end is so satisfying. I also love his dynamic with... pretty much anyone he is friend with. yuma-kotori besties is such a cute one. yuma-mihael also being friend and having this nerdier aspect in common. yuma-alito brainless moments. Like they're just so fun and cute to me.

Favorite headcanon: something something adhd. He has horrible focusing abilities and I love him.

[goldfishlover73]

Writers ask!

1. Start to finish, how long did it take to plan and write? Did you take breaks during the process?

6. How did you decide what tense and POV(s) to use?

18. Talk about your editing and revision process

26. Share your favorite detail

We'll talk about MGG because that's the big boi I've been working on.

Start to finish, how long did it take to plan and write.

The initial idea is based off a one shot that I wrote for the 2016 kksk month, and various "one-shots" in the universe, but I didn't start really thinking about connecting it all and creating a real story until 2019??? when I decided to combine it all. Then in 2021 when I started revising Misadventures, I started fully fleshing this story out. I finished writing it in 2022, maybe 2023 and it's been in the revision process since then.

I have to take breaks, especially in the revision process. I have to physically remove myself from the story, particularly this story because of how involved it is. Because...you know...it's got to make sense! lol

Planning and outlining are more of a vibe at first. I start writing until my brain figures out what it wants. Then I make small notes (mainly so my goldfish brain doesn't forget). A lot of it is making notes through out and then going back during the second pass and adding and developing. Third and fourth pass, more expansion.

and then MGG...the story is done and my brain says "ADD YAMS"

...so I had to incorporate a new character into a finished story.

Do not recommend.

6.How did you decide what tense and POV(s) to use? I almost always write in past tense. I prefer it. In Boba in Love I used tense as a story driver-the timeline is not linear and so you can follow where they are in the story by the tense.

POV? Depends. Usually it's for who will have the biggest emotional impact or helps gear the reader in the way I want.

like in Misadventures, the story wouldn't have been so interesting if we had been in Sakura's POV. Trying to 'solve the mystery of this mysterious Sakura' is far more compelling than knowing exactly what she is doing.

At least, that's how I saw it.

Same with MGG! MGG is in Sakura's POV because it's a more interesting story with the reader being with Sakura in not knowing who these magical being are.

And with both of these stories...the POV isn't the person that has the true character development, which I always find to be fun.

18. Editing a revising

I write my first draft and then go back and reread it. The first draft of most things is extremely bare bones. It's that first revision where I start exploring more ideas and expanding scenes. Going back and adding things, putting in foreshadowing, that kind of thing. The second draft is usually a mass editing bit. And my third read through is what I call my mass revision. The final fine toothed comb.

There are usually more read throughs with fics until I can't see anything else that needs revised (or I can't bear to look at it again.)

Shorter fics have a shorter time line, but these mid length fics like Isekai usually gets four solid read throughs

26. Favorite Detail

My favorite detail of MGG (which is a story no one has seen) is how intricate it is. How the story itself is so fleshed out and robust.

And the ending. The ending gets bananas and it's so wonderful (plus you have to read the rest to get there. hehehe)

THANKS FOR THE ASK!

[sailoryooons]

Suga's How-To Guide | Interlude II | myg (m)

☾ Pairing: Camboy!Yoongi x f. reader

❀ Summary: Min Yoongi has been a cam boy for a few years now. The work is easy, the money is good, and he has loyal viewers. When he approaches you and asks if you want to be his muse for a ‘how-to’ series, your view on the infamous Yoongi changes.

☾ Word Count: 3,432

☾ Genre: Friends to lovers, pwp

☾ Rating: 18+ Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging and reading this content. It contains explicit content and any minors discovered reading or engaging with this work will be blocked immediately. 

☾ Warnings: Readers inner turmoil, discussions of sexual expression, discussions of sexual repression and shaming, heart-to-hearts and some fluffiness, sleepy Yoongi is a warning in my opinion okay, some very light depictions of anxiety and nervousness

☾ Published: January 6, 2023

☾ A/N: Hi this is a very short and fluffy "official" end to the plot portion of this series. I know there is not smut in this, but I wanted to focus on the emotions/conversation piece in this and there's smut in every other chapter!!! I will upload smutty drabbles with this couple at random, but I will no longer be actively looking to have scheduled updates or frequent ones. Thank you for letting me randomly put a little bit of plot into something that was supposed to just be meaningless and aimless, and I hope you enjoyed the little heart to heart here - I think that having discussions with yourself and how you view sex and sexual expression is incredibly important, and my goal with this series was to always remain sex-positive! We will see some drabbles in the future with some fun little things :) LOL NOT ME UPLOADING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WORK DAY HEHEH BYE

☾ Disclaimer: All members of BTS are faces and name claims for this story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment or representation of real-life people. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real-life scenarios.

Masterlist | Ask | Series Masterlist | Part of Hali’s Happy Agust | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Shame-inspired war rages inside of you. 

On one side of the fence is rationality. Rationality believes that your ex has nothing to do with you. Has no place to judge you. This side of you knows that what you’re doing - have been doing - with Yoongi isn’t shameful at all. You’re expressing yourself and exploring a sexual experience you never thought you might enjoy. But you do enjoy it, and you enjoy… the way it makes you feel. There’s nothing wrong with that.

Except the other side of the war thinks there is something wrong with that. This side is insecurity. Insecurity believes that what others think of you is crucial and that public opinion can make or break you. It makes you think that your cam work with Yoongi is awful because it’s taboo and it makes you think that you should be embarrassed for wanting to participate in that. For doing something so lewd. 

Swallowing past the lump in your throat, you open your apartment door. Taehyung grins, bright as the sun as he drifts past you, slipping into your house casually and comfortably. Taehyung has that way about him. His factory setting is relaxed and cheerful, molding himself to whatever the setting requires of him.

You wonder what it’s like to be so confident, to live in an ever-present state of self-assuredness the way Taehyung does. The way Yoongi tends to, especially in front of the camera. 

Asking Taehyung to come over and chat had been a spur-of-the-moment idea. You need a second opinion, need someone who has been in this position to shed some light. To help ease the shame inside of you. At least, that’s what you’re hoping for. 

Settling on your couch with crossed legs and sipping a glass of wine, Taehyung looks up at you with round eyes and a grin. “Alright, spill. What’s making you so miserable?” 

“That easy to tell, huh?” You sit in a chair facing him, pulling your knees to your chest. You balance a glass of wine on your knee, feeling your stomach flip uncertainly. “Honestly, I really need you to promise to make this a judgment-free zone and I need the most unbiased and straightforward opinion you can offer.” 

“I can do those things.” He offers a gentle smile and the nervousness in your stomach eases a little. “Go ahead.”

Taking a deep breath, you try to organize how you want to admit what you’re thinking. It’s hard to form the words but you manage to tell Taehyung in stilted sentences how you started hooking up with Yoongi. You expect him to gasp or to give a physical reaction to the news, but he offers encouraging nods and sips his wine, completely unreactive and overwhelmingly patient. 

Heat flushes your neck and cheeks as you start reading the text messages your ex sent. You’re unsure how exactly he found Yoongi or his content with you, but the how doesn’t matter. You put it out there and you were fully aware of the result that could have. You thought you were ready for it.

The way you feel says otherwise. 

“First,” Taehyung says when you complete your explanation, “I want you to know that I’m really sorry that you’re so overwhelmed right now. I can see it in your expression and body language. This is a safe space. Second, I don’t think anything you’re doing is wrong. There is nothing wrong with being sexually confident, or being in a consented, public space for sex. You and Yoongi are both consenting adults, practicing safe sex, in front of a consenting audience.” 

Weight begins to lift off of your shoulders as Taehyung leans forward, round eyes earnest. “It is really hard to balance the desire for something considered unconventional with how we are conditioned by the society around us. Sex work and sexual explorations are generationally and culturally something that has been used for fear-mongering and public shame.” 

“And I know that,” you insist, shifting in your seat. “I think that sexual expression and freedom and learning sensuality is so important. There’s nothing wrong with it, and yet… I have such an internalized fear that I don’t… know what to do.”

“Well, hopefully, you blocked him?” You nod and Taehyung smiles. “Good, you absolutely need to eliminate the influences in your life who reinforce the ideals that make you feel ashamed. I think that you should consider if this is something you can reconcile with. If you know there is nothing wrong with it, and it seems to be a single person who is stirring these feelings of shame, will cutting off that person and reminding yourself help you get over it?”

“I mean, I hope so. I just got so afraid and felt like… I don’t know, like I had done something wrong. And I didn’t want to hurt Yoongi’s feelings and make him feel dirty by association because of my reaction.”

He hums thoughtfully. “While that might be your intention, vanishing and hiding from him certainly has negative connotations. Were I Yoongi, I would feel like you thought exactly that or maybe came to a realization that he wasn’t what you wanted.”

The guilt is deep. You know that - you know you’ve fucked up. Yoongi is owed better than what you’ve given him, and hearing Taehyung confirm what you already knew makes it worse. 

Sinking down into your seat, you sigh heavily. “I know,” you whisper. “I made it worse by doing that and now I’m equally afraid of explaining how I feel and apologizing. I really don’t want him to feel like my mortification is because of him or should be mutual.”

“Yoongi will get it. You think he didn’t feel weird when he started out? Yoongi wasn’t always as confident and assured in who he is as a person. And as someone else who has done this with him casually before, I can assure you that he would be able to put your fears at ease and have a conversation about it better than anyone I know.”

You nod, chewing your lip before glancing at Taehyung, a little nervous. “I like him.”

“Obviously.”

“No, I mean I like him.”

Taehyung laughs and rolls his eyes. “Yes, I know. I can tell. Yoongi is smart and kind and has a wonderful soul. Also, as you now know, really good in bed.”

Face warmed, you hide your face with your hands, but you’re laughing this time. Taehyung giggles along with you, shuffling so that he can lean over the edge of the couch, giving your knee a squeeze. “I want you to know that you’re not dirty and there is no shame in what you’re doing. I don’t think so, our friends wouldn’t think so, and I hope you can come to think so. But that’s going to have to come from you. It doesn’t matter what I think.” 

“I know. I think I just needed to hear it from someone else.”

“I understand. It’s nice to have someone else tell you you’re not crazy. So stop gaslighting yourself and try to reconcile how you feel with what you want.” 

“Thank you for coming to talk to me. I know it might be a little weird.”

“It isn’t. What Yoongi and I had was casual and non-affectionate. I promise there are no weird feelings there and I can tell that he likes you.” Taehyung grins. “I mean, he brought you a case of wine and just brought me one bottle.”

You feel lighter after Taehyung leaves. At least a little. The melancholy follows you around a bit as you clean up, trying to think of all the ways that you can tell how you’re feeling to Yoongi.

The biggest hold-up is that you don’t want him to feel like you’re insulting him or that you think what he does is something to be ashamed of. Because you don’t. But Taehyung has a point - if Yoongi doing it is okay, why isn’t it for you? 

Sitting on your couch, you try and think about that. What about it makes you feel like it’s something to hide or something to feel guilty over? As you stare unseeing and chew on your lip, it occurs to you that part of the reason you wanted to do cam work with Yoongi in the first place was that you wanted to step outside of your comfort zone.

Yoongi’s offer had come on a whim after a very embarrassing admission that you’d never had an orgasm from oral. He had been willing to change that and threw in the extra experience of something new. Something exciting. Something… very opposite to what your sex life had previously been.

When you were dating your ex, you feared that everything would always be the same. That people only experience heavy, hot pleasure in erotica novels and films, and that all of your friends who were with partners actively making them come in a variety of different ways was just… not for you.

The breakup wasn’t specifically about your sex life, but now as you think about it, you realize that is a huge part of it. Because you wanted something more, something new. You wanted to be confident in asking a partner to do things that were non-traditional or new to you. You wanted to be able to trust your partner to never look at you weirdly and to know that they had your pleasure in their hands.

That they would take care of you.

And that’s when it clicks. 

All this time, you had been leading a sexual life that had nothing to do with what you want, and it was like… like you trained yourself to think that you can’t have new things. That wanting to be choked or slapped for once during sex is weird and unthinkable, and that none of that is for you. Settling over and over again for things that don’t please you has backed you into a corner, and having your ex shame you again for wanting those things has brought back the thoughts that you don’t deserve to have what you want. That what you want is wrong. 

Yoongi is never like that. You think about the way he talks to his viewers, how he has created a series dedicated to how to safely practice different sex acts. He talks about it like it’s an art form, like he appreciates the complexity and beauty of the human body. 

Without thinking twice, you snatch your phone and car keys from the counter, rushing to get to your car. Suddenly it feels so stupid that you ever left him hanging by himself in his apartment, and you hope he’ll hear you out. 

Maybe you don’t deserve it. But the twisting feeling in your gut as you drive to his house, white-knuckling the steering wheel and taking deep breaths the entire way is reason enough to try and see it through. 

If it makes you nervous, Seokjin had said once, It’s probably a good thing.

You aren’t sure how true those words are or even if you should trust advice from Seokjin of all people, but you find yourself standing outside of Yoongi’s door, hand lifted and ready to knock. You feel the butterflies swirl once more and nod.

The first knock is barely a tap and you mentally curse at yourself before taking a deep breath in and - knock knock. 

Hand shaking, you lower your fist, staring at the door. There’s the soft hush of feet against the floor but despite that, you flinch when you hear the bolt turn and the chain lock hiss as Yoongi swings the door open, blinking sleep from his eyes as he squints from you.

For a second, you forget why you’re there. He’s in dark grey sweats, a baggie long-sleeve shirt and face swollen with sleep. Before you can help yourself, you let out a soft laugh, biting your bottom lip. His cheeks are particularly round when he’s just woken up and his eyes are squinted. There are faint lines that lead you to believe he was asleep on his couch.

“Hello,” he greets awkwardly, sleepy voice deep and raspy. 

Fuck. You realize you’d know how his voice sounds right when he wakes up if you had stayed that morning. It makes you remember why you’re there and you shake the flustered thoughts from your mind.

Clearing your throat, you murmur, “Hi. Can I come in and talk?”

Wordlessly, Yoongi opens the door wider, holding it open for you. With a bow of your head to thank him, you enter the apartment.

Nothing has changed since you were there only two days ago. His house is still surreptitiously neat and it smells like he has a candle burning. The TV in the living room is on and there’s a blanket half on the floor, and half on the couch, confirming that’s where he had been napping.

You raise your brows when you see the channel and ask, “Iron Chef?”

“Mhmm.” He trails by you to sit on the couch, pulling the blanket out of the way for you to sit. “I like cooking. Plus, it always gives me ideas for new things to try out.”

“I didn’t take you for the chef type.”

“Well, I guess we don’t know each other very well, do we?”

His words sting a bit. You sit on the edge of his couch, too stiff to sit back and relax. Yoongi’s dark eyes are searching as he leans to mute the TV before settling back against the armrest of his chair. “Everything okay? I am assuming by the silence and wanting to talk that it’s not.”

“Yes and no. Maybe?”

“That… clears things up.”

He gives you a small grin and it eases some of the tension, a sigh bleeding out of you. “First I want to apologize for my vanishing act. I woke up to… some text messages I’ll share in a moment, but I was feeling some type of way and I was worried about dumping my feelings on you, or letting how I felt insult you.”

He purses his lips. “How so?”

Licking your lips, you give Yoongi a summary of waking up early in the morning after your night together to a hateful stream of texts. Yoongi’s jaw flexes and his eyes darken under his brows as he listens, but he says nothing, letting you navigate your tumultuous feelings. 

“I realized that I wasn’t ashamed of those things,” you say gently. “And I was terrified of you thinking that if I felt that way, that you should, or that I thought what we did was dirty. It wasn’t. I just… suddenly felt like I was in the wrong again for thinking something could be for me. Or for wanting something.” 

He hums and nods. “So,” you conclude. “I’m sorry for how I reacted. I should have had a conversation with you, and I should have done some introspection before leaving you unanswered and confused. I can understand if you don’t accept that apology.”

For a few moments, Yoongi is silent. Outside, rain starts to patter against the window. It catches your attention, the grey sky a smeary backdrop as the window is painted opaque by the hush of rain.

Yoongi shifts and draws your attention back to him, his expression careful. “I thought I had done something wrong,” he admits. You start to protest and he holds up a hand. “I know now that I didn’t, but that’s how it felt. I want you to know that you don’t have to talk to me about these things, but I would like you to because… I like you.” He shrugs. “And I forgive you because I understand what feeling you’re talking about. It took a long time for me to be comfortable with what I wanted. This exploration will always come with doubts, but if you can trust me, I’d like for you to tell me when you have them.”

“So you’re not… mad?”

He shakes his head and frowns. “No, of course not. I mean it did suck, feeling all that anxiety and wondering what was going through your head, but you’re human. I don’t begrudge you for being capable of making a hasty decision.”

Relief opens up like a well inside of you. You sag against his couch and he laughs a little, the light reaching his eyes. He leans against the back of his couch, head resting on the cushion as he looks at you. The way he smiles, eyes crinkling at the corner makes your stomach flip. 

“So you want to like…” you gesture vaguely between you. “Keep at whatever this is? Even though I fucked up?”

“I want whatever you're comfortable with.” He seems to consider something, chewing on the inside of his cheek. Gently, he adds, “I’d actually like to take you on a date and get to know you beyond the basics that I already have, Charmeleon93.”

Heat blooms in your chest and you feel your face warm. Yoongi laughs loudly as you hide your face in your hands, groaning and sinking even further into the cushions as though you can melt into them and disappear forever. “No fucking way.”

“Yes fucking way,” Yoong confirms. “You think I don’t remember that Charmeleon card you had? Or your birth year? Come on, be a little more creative.”

“It was a spur-of-the-moment thing. I was…”

“You were?”

The words threaten to get stuck in your throat. He smirks at you, raising his brows as to say, Go on. 

“I saw that you were streaming and I was nervous maybe you were um�� with someone else.”

“Oh?”

“So I logged on to see and then you weren’t, and I was going to log off but I didn’t. Because um.” 

“You liked what you saw?” 

“Maybe.”

He drums his fingers on the couch. You stare at them, long and slender and familiar. You know how they can pull pleasure out of you, practiced and perfect. He doesn’t have rings on today, but his hands are just as beautiful. Dimly, you remember the first time you had come to his apartment - you’d been distracted by his hands then too.

Yoongi notices, a sideways smirk appearing on his face. “What do you want?” 

“Hmm?”

“What do you want, baby?”

The endearment makes your stomach flutter. You squeeze your thighs together and squirm under his gaze, watching as his dark eyes glitter. “I didn’t come here for that,” you murmur. “I came here to apologize and beg forgiveness.”

“There was nothing to be forgiven.” His smile softens a little. “So what is it that you want?”

“You.” You swallow past the nervousness twisting in your chest and throat. “I want to get to know you.  Because I do like you, beyond the physical stuff.” 

“We can do that.” Silence stretches between the two of you for a moment as you offer a shy smile. Yoongi returns it, patting the couch by him. “Come here.”

Yoongi smells like heaven when you slide across the couch toward him. His hands pull your hips, lifting you just a bit to slide you into his lap. Immediately his arms come around you, pulling you to his chest until you’re flush against him. He’s warm and his shirt is soft. You lay your head on the junction between his neck and shoulder, letting your eyes flutter shut.

Grabbing the blanket, Yoongi pulls it over your legs, nestling you further. You smile, tucking your hands into the fabric of his shirt and letting him settle with you in your arms. It’s new, but it’s nice, the feeling of being so close making you warm and dizzy.

“This is nice,” you admit softly. You press your face into his neck. “Thank you for being so understanding.”

He hums, the sound vibrating against you. “Thank you for being honest with me and telling me how you felt.” His cheek presses against your head. “How about you stay the night and I make you dinner? It can be our first official date.”

“Oooo inviting me to sleep over on the first date? Min Yoongi, what do you think I am?”

“I think you’re very cute.” He pauses and laughs. “And maybe I was thinking we could make up for you having to watch my stream instead of being here, hmm?”

You smile. “I like the sound of that.” 

Yoongi noses your head a little, making you look up at him. He catches your lips in a soft kiss, making you sigh into him. His lips are gentle, a reminder that not everything between you has to be about sexual chemistry. The thought of more with Yoongi excites you. 

Tucked in his arms, the weight of everything else doesn’t matter. It’s just you and Yoongi watching Iron Chef. And it’s all you need.

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