#thanks delia! xxx

[brettyimages]

bookish survey! A, C, H, I, O, Q, R, Z

Author You’ve Read The Most Books From - I just answered this one but in addition to my previous answers I also read a lot of John Green's novels and books written by members of Motley Crue, if you can lump them together as one collective

Currently Reading - my current main book is Glamorama by Bret Easton Ellis. I've also got Sylvia Plath's Journals, The Scarlet Letter, and That's Your Lot by Limmy on the go as my non-fiction, e-book and short stories for travelling books...

Hidden Gem Book - I read Fangirls by Hannah Rose Ewens last summer and adored it. It's a non-fiction study of fangirl behaviour and covers queuing all day outside gigs, calling your faves daddy in the comments of their insta pics, travelling to the US for a glimpse of Courtney, going on walks around the places Amy Winehouse hung out and so much more and I saw so much of myself and my loved ones in it.

Important Moments of Your Reading Life - I answered this one already too but adding switching Morrissey's Autobiography (so boring) for How To Be A Woman by Caitlin Moran and having to put it down so I didn't start laughing aloud on the train. I think that was one of the first feminist books I read and it was so much fun.

One Book That You Have Read Multiple Times - this is where I have to shout out to Coal Black Mornings by Brett Anderson. I devoured the library copy before going to his book signing, I've had him read it to me via audiobook, I've read the paperback on my way to hear him talk about the sequel. It's now battered and full of page markers as I used it as a London guidebook, walking the streets he walked and seeing the places he lived and loved; it's invaluable to me.

Quote From A Book That Inspires You/Gives You Feels - it's lame because it's from a John Green novel but it's true: "what a treacherous thing it is to believe that a person is more than a person".

Reading Regret - I didn't read much in high school at all, only YA novels about girls who were rock guitarists or goth teenagers or music biographies. I skimmed most of the books I had to read for classes and just fell out of love with reading in general for a few years.

ZZZ-Snatcher (last book that kept you up WAY late) - Dracula: I read it as part of Dracula Daily along with the rest of Tumblr and it kept me going on the long tube journeys out to the hotels I could afford for last minute Suede jaunts. It didn't keep me up necessarily because it was a page-turner but it kept me from falling asleep on the train!

[stayevildarling]

Hi, could I request something with the classic 4 (Delia, Mina, Billie and Reader)? Essentially it's one of them struggling with their mental health and the others all help them, but it's Mina, not the Reader. Idk why I worded it like that- Mina's mental health has been getting worse for a while and she's (obviously) denied it, but the other 3 finally decide to try and get through to her and get her to go and get some professional help. Thank you so much! Love your stuff btw xxx

Wilhemina Venable x Cordelia Goode x Billie Dean Howard x Reader- Love and Lavender

A/N: Thank you very much for this request 💜 I usually struggle really badly to make characters suffer but for some reason this sparked my inspiration and put my other stuff on hold for a moment. I hope you enjoy

tags/warnings: established relationship, mention of depression, mention of suicidal intention, mention of suicide attempt, mention of overdose, mention of scoliosis, mention of doctors and hospitals, very heavy angst

word count: 5k

taglist:

@lunaticwhittaker , @billiebeanhoward , @lanawinters-ily , @kenzbro , @minaslittleone , @httpfiftyshadesofgay @whitelotus00 , @ninaahs , @paulsonsratched , @vintagepaulson , @isle-of-earle , @grilledcheeseandguavajelly , @lucyintheskywithxanax , @fanfics4world , @mymiraclewitch , @hazard-to-myself , @awritersometimes , @wastdstime , @p1pecleanerwitheyes , @queen2234 , @ihartnat , @lifebyinez , @ahsatanizgay , @blu3dimples, @stepintomyworld

For weeks the tension at the academy had been charged , the academy that usually blooms with sunshine, light and the occasional swirl of magic in the air. The four of you had been beside each other for years, tangled deeply in each other‘s hearts and souls. You joined them a little bit later on, part of the academy and Cordelia‘s most promising student but more importantly and much quicker than anticipated you became their everything, making them whole.

It didn‘t take long until you became Billie‘s babydoll, so in love for the way you would support her dreams and desires, always helping her out with the promotion of her show, setting up some social media and spending hours to give her the recognition she deserves. In return, she would spoil you rotten, never not taking you out on her days off, giving you the entire world and making every one of your dreams come true.

Cordelia adored how gentle and kind you were with the students, wanting the other witches to thrive and help out some of the younger ones. Whenever Cordelia‘s shoulders had been tired from carrying the weight of being headmistress and supreme at the same time, you would be there, slowly easing the tension and telling her how amazing she is doing her job. And in return Cordelia gave you the same support and gentleness, turning your most darkest days brighter. The two of you always knew when something wasn‘t right, not just due to your magic but also the deep connection. And so you became Delia‘s sweetheart.

Wilhemina adored you and quickly made you her little one, enjoying to spend quiet times with you by the fire place, whispered love confessions and reading to you. The two of you enjoyed the silence, spending time without a lot of words needing to be exchanged. You always had her back, on a bad day you would make her a bath and her favorite meal without asking, when her calendar was busy, you would get her medicine for her without asking, taking her to her weekly doctors appointments without words and simply holding her hand. And she took care of your soul, always protective around you.

Lately, the careless times spent together, the comforting atmosphere around you four, was replaced by tension and darkness. It took you a while to catch up, reading Mina‘s silence for her usual quietness and walls at first but the smile had undeniably been wiped from her beautiful features, her walks a little slower each day and her usual jokes and bantering with Billie stopping altogether. Often she would come home so late from work, she would miss dinner, her plate still full in the morning, the baths you made for her still like that in the morning. She would start spending nights in her office rather than you three.

And of course the three of you noticed, Billie starting to lift the mood with her usual jokes but never connecting with the redhead, trying to spoil her with some self care gifts but never getting more than a quiet „Thank you Billie“ out of the woman and the gift baskets would simply pile up on her desk. Cordelia had tried talking to her for the longest time, getting her to open up but despite their usual connection and the supreme’s ability to break through her walls, it was hopeless. The redhead had been surrounded by darkness, unable to keep struggling with her condition, the physicial pain and the mental toll any longer. And of course you had tried, finding her in her office at night, trying to just sit beside her with some tea and an offer that you are there if she wanted. But nothing worked and the three of you had been growing increasingly concerned.

With another weekend approaching, the three of you had decided to take the afternoon off, preparing for Wilhemina‘s return from work. Billie had gotten some purple flowers for her, Cordelia preparing her favorite meal and some wine and you had drawn her a bath with her favorite lavender bath salts that you went to get for her. The three of you had decided to approach this head on together, knowing things couldn‘t keep going this longer, hating to see the woman you loved so much struggling to this extent. To your surprise, she returned on time, wondering what happened for the sudden change but happy nevertheless. The four of you began chatting quietly, a quick thank you and a forced smile for the bath, the flowers and the dinner.

„Mina darling we meant to speak to you“ Billie begins quietly, hiding her nerves by playing with her rings. The tension instantly builds as the redhead averts her gaze from either of you three, clearly not in the mood to deal with this subject. Cordelia interjects, noticing how the redhead stiffens further before she tries taking the redheads hand from across the table. „Honey we are only worried about you“ she explains, trying to slowly break through her walls which must be at an all time high right now. „There is nothing to worry about“ she snaps, her tone matching her inner annoyance. You glance at both of your blonde girlfriends, communicating in silence that this was the wrong time for this.

„Mina I understand if you don‘t want to talk but we are here for you that‘s all okay?“ you try gently, giving her a warm smile that you would quit the subject now and usually she would understand if she wasn‘t so frustrated tonight. „I said I‘m fine“ she snaps, her chair scraping off the floor before she leaves. And this wasn‘t so bad if she didn‘t leave her cane behind, the three of you looking after her with all the concern in the world. „Mina your cane“ you try but she‘s already forcing herself up the stairs. Your cutlery clangs against your plate in frustration, Billie already extracting a cigarette to cool off and hide her concern. Cordelia‘s eyes are filled with tears, never having seen her like this before and you turn to her before wiping her tears. „It‘s okay, we will sort this out and help her“ you reassure, your eyes filled with honesty.

The weekend slowly progresses, Wilhemina mostly hiding in her office as she struggles with the pain that is threatening to consume her whole. She had never meant to let it go this far, withdrawing from you three the way that she had been, snapping at you three, not appreciating the gestures but she couldn‘t snap out of her state. Her pains had been so bad, struggling to keep herself upright at times but still forcing herself to walk without her cane, punishing herself for the way she had acted and lost control. She couldn‘t fight her inner demons, the voices her parents had left in her early on, causing her to forget what the three of you had taught her long ago. Telling her that she wasn‘t worth love, that the three of you would be better off without her, that she needed to punish herself, for being weak. That her scoliosis wasn‘t that bad, that she needed to get over this.

She had been lost in this daze for weeks, struggling to keep her emotions at bay, often snapping at her bosses at work, not taking their usual abuse and losing her temper more. Hiding away in the office or at home as she knew neither of you three deserved this side of her, trying to shield you from this. But the voices had sounded much darker and harsher lately, giving her ideas that hadn‘t crossed her mind in years, making her feel like a stupid teenager again. She had been sloppy with her medicine, sometimes skipping it to punish herself, sometimes taking much more than she is meant to, in order to stop the pain she had ultimately caused herself by not being careful and on top of this, the way she usually would.

This afternoon, you once again found her cane abandoned somewhere after taking it to her before. And you couldn‘t stand seeing her like this anymore, you take her cane before knocking on her office door and waiting for a reply. It comes after a while and you step inside, finding her sit by her desk, her posture tense and her gaze averted, fixed on some point in the distance. Carefully, you close the door and walk over to her, placing the cane beside her and noticing how she had an open document on her computer but it being empty and confirming your assumptions that she hadn‘t been working on anything at all. You take a seat opposite her, glancing at her for a moment and the sight kills you. She looked so sad, as if she is carrying all the weight off this world on her shoulders, the pain written deeply behind her brown eyes and for a moment some tears swell in your eyes, quickly forcing them away, knowing you needed to be strong for her now.

„Mina?“ you ask gently but she doesn‘t look at you, lost in her own world, unaware of how truly bad and dark it had gotten. „Mina please“ you try again „I‘m worried about you, I know you don‘t like this and wanna talk about it but I care about you and we know you are hurting, you keep leaving your cane, you keep withdrawing from us and I just wanna help you like the many times you have helped us“ you plead. For the first time in a while her eyes flicker towards you and for a moment you have a glimpse of hope, thinking she may finally break her walls and talk to you but she averts her gaze just as quickly again. You sigh, unsure what to do, not knowing how to deal with her silence any longer. But you can‘t falter now, not when your whole world is sitting in front of you struggling so badly.

„Mina I can‘t stand seeing you like this, I love you, you are my whole world and I hate seeing you struggle so much. I know you are punishing yourself with this“ you carry on, gesturing towards her cane. „I know you don‘t want to withdraw from us but please come back to us.. to me.. I miss you“ this time the tears roll down your cheeks, unable to hide them for a second longer. She notices, of course she does and she considers it then, hating to see how much this was hurting you, having sworn she would never do this to any of you. The silence that follows is defeating and you sigh after a while before getting up. „Please know that I will always be here, no matter what, and if you need anything, no matter what or when please find me“ you offer her, leaving her office in tears before you sob as you make it down the hallway.

As soon as her door closes and she hears the silent sob, her own emotions get the better off her and she begins crying herself, the weight of your words hitting her like a sharp knife. She wanted so desperately to speak, to comfort you and to reach out for help at the same time but she couldn‘t, her walls keeping her from doing so and causing her to remain silent. Billie and Cordelia find your sobbing form and immediately approach you but you wipe your tears, not wanting them to worry about you when the person you loved most strugged so much and clearly needed help. „What happened?“ Cordelia asks softly before you fill them in. Their concern matching yours and unsure what else to do to help your girlfriend anymore.

That night you couldn‘t sleep, Mina never joining you in bed and her absence causing your thoughts to spiral. You left bed early, much earlier than your girlfriends who managed to find sleep eventually. And so you opt to prepare breakfast, with all the witches being out and with their families, hoping the four of you can enjoy some quiet and spend time together. You prepare for a while, making coffee, tea and making the academy smell so nice, opting to prepare your girlfriend’s favorite pastries. By the time you finish, you collect some tea and a pastry, knowing it would be a challenge to get the redhead to join breakfast and at least wanting her to eat, having missed her at dinner last night. By the time you finish, your other two girlfriends are long awake, withdrawing for a bit to find some solutions.

By the time you make it to her office, you knock but without success. You consider to leave, thinking she may not want to see you or maybe she had fallen asleep. But something within you, maybe your magic, maybe your intuition or maybe your love causes you to open the door only to find her office empty. Your eyebrows furrow as you set the little tray on her desk, opting to leave and find her before you hear a faint noise from her bathroom door within her office. You knock again but the redhead can‘t hear you, too caught up in her world of pain. She had been standing there for far too long, an entire vial of her medication in her palm, fighting an internal battle against the voices that tell her to finally put a stop to this, end her own and ultimately your suffering but something holds her back.

The concern ripples through you and so you open the door, unsure what you may find but nothing could have prepared you for what you ended up seeing. There she stands, her eyes filled with pain and tears, the same empty expression on her face, her cane again abandoned near her. Then you see the empty medicine vials on the sink before seeing her shaking hands. „Mina“ you halt, your heart stopping at the imagine in front of you. Thoughts overwhelm you about how much she had been suffering in silence, how you should have done more to help and protect her. „Mina please don‘t“ you plead, your voice coming out much more broken than you intended to.

„Please“ you plead again, scared if you stepped forward that she may take them all. Your hands and legs begin shaking, feeling like your whole world is turned upside down and ultimately in the hands of the woman in front of you. Her eyes close, a heavy silence between you two and you take a chance, stepping forward and wrapping your shaking hands around her own, which tremble at the sensation. Suddenly the pills clatter all over the bathroom floor, each noise another reminder for what could have happened. The two of you stand there frozen and you use your magic to communicate with Cordelia in silence, knowing you couldn‘t do this on your own.

The supreme sits in her office with Billie, trying to find a way to help Wilhemina, the two of them going back and forth with options before your energy and voice fill her thoughts. „Delia please I need your help in Mina‘s bathroom“ she hears and instantly she rises to her feet, the concern rippling through her upon hearing and feeling your distress. „What?“ Billie asks confused and all the supreme can mutter is a rushed „Hurry“ before she leaves her office, quickly bursting through the doors to reach you both. She halts in her steps when she sees what happened, the pills clattered everywhere, Mina standing there with her eyes closed, you holding back the tears as you still hold onto her hands, pleading with the supreme for help.

She composes herself, with a flick of her wrist making the pills disappear, Billie standing there frozen in shock, unable to move. Cordelia steps forward, giving you a nod to move aside and you do, giving her space to handle this. She steps forward, taking Wilhemina‘s trembling hands into her own. „Honey?“ she tries and when the redhead opens her eyes, tears flow freely down her cheeks. „I‘m sorry“ she whispers, filled with honesty, pain and a heavy guilt. The supreme glances at Billie, urging her to take you away from here, noticing your state and how much you are shaking. „Come on baby“ she whispers, her hands on your shoulders and guiding you away from here. She takes you downstairs and you burst out the back door into the garden, your whole world crashing down as you feel incredibly sick, trying to take deep breaths in order to calm yourself.

„Baby what happened?“ Billie asks softly, placing her hand on your back, trying to soothe and ground you at the same time. „Billie“ you pant, unable to control your breathing. „She was gonna end it, she was gonna leave us“ you begin breaking down, unable to get the image out of your head. Billie instantly takes you into her arms, holding you in her steady arms as you break down, her own tears running down her cheeks, feeling the pain radiating from you and her own shock still deep from what she had seen. The two of you stay in each other‘s embrace, holding each other and keeping yourselves from falling apart completely.

Meanwhile, Cordelia had managed to get Wilhemina to sit down, despite the gentleness, forcing the redhead to open up, unable to risk something like this happening again. And slowly, the redhead began apologizing, explaining how she never wanted things to escalate this way, her walls slowly crumbling down as the truth begins spilling from her lips. The blonde listens intently to every word, holding her through the worst of the confessions, being there every step of the way. „Darling we need to get you some help, you can‘t keep dealing with this pain and you shouldn‘t have to“ the supreme encourages and the redhead finds herself nodding, knowing this was the last straw and that she couldn‘t keep going like this, both for her and your sake.

„I‘m so sorry Y/N had to see that“ she apologizes, feeling as if she only just now realizes what happened or rather what could have happened. „Me too but I‘m so glad she found you“ the supreme whispers, squeezing her hand a little tighter. „Can we make a plan honey?“ the supreme offers and Wilhemina nods, knowing she needs it and also doesn‘t have much of a choice after what happened. She nods and Cordelia offers to take her to her doctor tomorrow, knowing they need a change for her and Wilhemina nods, the supreme reassuring she would set up the appointment and take her.

„I want to talk to her“ Wilhemina reassures but her expression falters, feeling the guilt and fear of facing Billie but especially you. „But I‘m scared“ she admits and the supreme frowns, only able to assume how she must be feeling. „I‘m with you Mina, always“ she reassures and there is a silent understanding between them, that they will do this together, that they have each other‘s back. It takes a little while before they both reach you and Billie, the medium outside smoking as you lay on the sofa, wrapped in one of Wilhemina‘s knitted blankets. Cordelia gives Wilhemina an encouraging nod before finding Billie, wanting to check on her and keep her in the loop what has been said between them.

„Y/N?“ Wilhemina‘s voice softly breaks through the silence and you immediately jump to your feet, the concern rippling through you as you see her standing there. „Are you okay?“ you ask, the fear still lingering on your features. „I‘m okay“ she reassures quietly, stepping forward as her cane echoes through the silence. „I‘m so sorry little one“ she apologizes and your eyebrows furrow, not understanding why she feels the need to apologize to you. „It‘s okay Mina, I‘m just glad..“ you begin but stop when your throat begins tightening. There is a heavy silence between you two, guilt, shame and a thick sadness and neither of you know what to do exactly until you break the silence. „May I..“ you pause, collecting yourself „May I hug you?“ you ask, just wanting to hold her and fix this.

Her world crumbles at your words and the pain and fear in it, she nods and you surge forward, holding her in your arms as if she is the most fragile thing on this planet. She melts right into you, finally feeling the distance between you both fading and for one of the first time‘s Wilhemina lets you be the one to comfort her, with each stroke of your fingers on her body, slowly melting the pain, the walls and the shame away. You whisper reassuring words that you aren‘t mad, aren‘t upset and only want her to be okay. In the end, the two of you are nestled in each other‘s arms, you holding the woman to your chest, careful of her posture. And the tension and sadness slowly fades, of course you both knew this wasn‘t over, that there was work to be done but right now, she was safe in your arms and you could make sure the world or herself couldn‘t hurt her anymore.

The evening quietens out a little as for the first time in a while the four of you have a meal together, savoring the moment despite the slight tension of unspoken words in the air. Cordelia had mentioned the doctors appointment in the morning briefly, asking you to look after her witches and classes which you of course agreed to. That night as Wilhemina lays beside you, you don‘t sleep a wink, your thoughts spiraling and also needing to make sure she is okay. You stay beside her for hours, watching her sleep, comforting her when she stirs. Cordelia had gotten rid of her medicine for now, only giving her the evening ones while staying with her.

And then they leave in the morning, Cordelia taking Wilhemina‘s hand and taking a very important and scary first step. When they returned, they both seemed brighter, both of them feeling a bit more hopeful. And then the weeks of work began, Wilhemina put on some medicine, going to therapy and the three of you there every step of the way. And of course there was no magic when it comes to these things but ever so slowly, Wilhemina managed to open up more, rest and tell you when her back was killing her, being more vulnerable and open and the distance between you replaced with closeness. And ever so slowly, the three of you didn‘t constantly fear her safety anymore, knowing she didn‘t truly want to leave but wanted the pain to go and it did, slowly and with a lot of work and support but it did.

The aftermath of it all left the three of you coping in your own ways, Cordelia more anxious than before, Billie having nightmares and you hiding the pain of what happened and how you had found Wilhemina. Billie was the first one to admit what was going on, an important first step as she confided in you and Cordelia and the two of you helped her in your own ways, establishing an evening ritual with her and talking about her nightmares a lot more which ultimately helped her. Cordelia‘s was a little harder to work through but it took your words that ultimately ended her suffering. It was a conversation in the middle of the night when you told her that no matter how much she tried, she couldn‘t control those things and had to let the fear go, trusting the universe to keep you four safe the way it had been and so slowly, the shaking of her hands stopped, the constant excessive worry and fussing over Wilhemina stopped.

And then in the end came your silent struggling, you hadn‘t told them too much about your past, your struggling with mental health related things. But the image of the pills and Wilhemina had been burnt into your brain, equally haunting you in your dreams, throughout the day and especially in the quiet moments. It hadn‘t just upset and scared you, it triggered you. And funnily enough it was Mina who noticed, asking you a few times and despite hating to lie to her, you couldn‘t tell her, knowing she would blame herself and open up the wounds she had tried so hard to close lately. But you knew you couldn‘t give into the urges that your brain sent you and so you decided to soldier through, knowing you could get over this with time.

This afternoon, another normal day at the academy, Cordelia approached you after teaching a class, asking how it went and you sat with her in her office giving her some updates. She had noticed too lately and decided to ask you about it. „How are you honey?“ she asks carefully and despite knowing her anxiety and that this may get her to worry again, you needed to confide in her. „Can I tell you something?“ you ask quietly and she nods before her hand finds you. „Ever since..“ you pause, hating to put those words in your mouth but she knew, giving you an understanding nod. „I haven‘t really told anyone this before but I used to struggle too and for weeks I have been triggered“ you admit, the tears flowing down your cheeks. „Please don‘t worry though, I don‘t want to leave you I promise but I just“ you stop yourself when you find her kneeling in front of you, pulling you into the tightest hug.

„Thank you for telling me sweetheart“ she thanks you sincerly, before wiping the tears off your face. „I know how hard this must be for you and how hard those weeks have been but I promise you, this will get better“ she assures, the same honesty that reflected in your eyes before now in her own. „And whenever you feel like this, I want you to find me and we will work through it together okay?“ she asks and you nod, reaching out your pinky as the two of you had a habit of pinky promises, ones neither of you would ever break. The two of you stay like this for a while, holding each other before she presses a gentle kiss to your temple. „Let‘s get some dinner shall we?“ she offers and you nod before taking her hand, trusting Cordelia with your whole life and knowing she was gonna be here now.

Tonight had been the first normal night in a while, both the medium and redhead returning from work at a normal time, the four of you enjoying dinner together, Billie telling ghost stories and Mina telling her work gossip and the two of them joking and bantering. Both you and Cordelia glance at each other, your features filled with relief, knowing slowly things are going back to normal. That night after the bath you had prepared for Wilhemina, she finds you sitting in the library, doing some reading before asking you if she could join. The two of you sit in silence, a much more comfortable one than the weeks before, the old silence again as you both read. „Would you like me to read to you?“ she offers and you nod before the two of you cuddle up in each other‘s arms.

In the end, you lay in her lap, making sure not to hurt her back as she reads to you. After finishing a chapter, she notices how you are looking at her, an expression she can‘t quite read. „Are you okay little one?“ she asks softly and you nod but nevertheless tears fill your vision and she instantly sets the book down before wiping your tears. „I‘m just glad you are better Mina“ you cry and she frowns then, fighting her own tears but letting them fall, having learnt a lot of things in the last few months, especislly through her therapist. „I‘m glad I‘m here and I‘m so thankful you found me, I know that can‘t have been easy“ she acknowledges, instinctively pulling you a little closer. „I love you Mina“ you whisper and she smiles lovingly before whispering „I love you so much more little one“. And the two of you end up staying like that, tangled in each other‘s arms, hearts and soul, facing the same struggles but never facing them alone ever again.

[phoenixflames12]

Hello! Hope you're doing well! How about number 13 from the 'soft asks to get to know people'? I just got braces so food is on my mind, haha.

Taken from this ask meme- thank you so much friend, and good luck with the braces!

13. what’s your comfort food?

Risotto. Specifically this recipie which looks like a lot of work, but when it's done and it's full of butter and cheese, it is literally the food of the gods and I could eat it for days. My Mum's/Delia Smith's broccoli soufflee would also probably be the meal I'd ask for if I had one meal left on this earth. Heaven, heaven, heaven.

Thank you much, friend!

Much love,

Phoenixflames12 xxx

[oh-mydarling]

STOP IT my favourite colour is pink too!! aww honey I wish I could give you a hug I love them too <3

ooooh I love Delia x Mina I'm excited to read it!!

yeah it was thank you xxx I'm getting my hair cut today and I'm lowkey scared bc I'm getting a lot off 😬

did you get your reading done yesterday? and are you up to much today?

-🌸

We are twins!!!

Hehe thank youuuuuu you’re lovely :)

Ohhh that’s so exciting!!!! I’m sure it’s gonna look AMAZING!!!!

I unfortunately didn’t :(( I had such a weird day yesterday hahaha so I’m going to try and do it today

[marvelfansince08love]

Title: “My loyalties lie with you, not the title you’ve been given”

Word count: 3259 

Pairing: Cordelia Goode x Female!Reader 

Prompt 12: “My loyalties lie with you, not the title you’ve been given”

Warning: Angst, Fluff - also a bit of teen!Cordelia for the sake of it!

A/N: Hey anon, I hope you enjoy this just as much as I enjoyed writing it! I enjoyed this so much that I might add a second part to it! x 

Thank you @imnotasuperhero​ for helping me re-arrange a few things, it’s always good to get a fresh pair of eyes when you’ve been working on it for six hours lmao x

Present day - Miss Robichaux’s Academy for Exceptional Young Ladies 

“The Wardwell family was one of many original witches from Salem and has some of the most powerful witches known to our kind. Their willingness to protect and serve the reigning supreme only intensifies their strength and power. With every new supreme, comes her new protector.” The young witches gasp, eyes wide enthralled in the history of Salem and the famous Wardwell family. 

“When a new supreme is found, the Wardwell family is drawn to her like a moth to a flame. A loyalty so fierce that her main protector can often find themselves mistaking their loyalty for passion and love-”

Giggling erupts throughout the history class making Myrtle pause and smile softly at their innocence. 

‘Such young naive minds’ she thinks pitifully. 

A young witch named Lucy raises her hand almost shyly. 

“Miss Snow, does that mean Miss. Delia has a protector? If so, how come we haven’t seen her? Are they in love?” Myrtle’s lip twitches slightly at their curiosity as the other girls in the class nod their heads in solidarity, their eyes wide full of interest.

“If you girls will allow me to finish, I will tell you.” She laughs softly at their giddiness.“The protector of the Supreme must always be ready to step in and help when she so desperately needs it but they can only do so much. If a protector is used for their unentitled purpose, say for the selfish needs of their Supreme, the bond that is created between the two can be severed, losing their connection to one another. A simple way of thinking about it is… those filthy mutts…” she pauses searching for the right words. “I mean wolves have mates. They love and protect them and sense when they are in danger and will die to protect them. That’s what a protector does. They don’t need to be around their person all the time. We have far too much class and elegance to pine over someone like that,” Myrtle says with slight disgust. The girls’ ‘ohh’s’ and ‘ahh’s clearly enthralled and maybe a little smitten with the idea of love and passion. 

“Does Delia know who she is Miss. Snow?” That makes her pause. Her thoughts drifted off to a time where she would have answered with a name so confidently but now not so certain.

“In time. When Cordelia needs her the most, she will turn up” 

Xxx

14 years ago (aged 18) - Miss Robichaux’s Academy for Exceptional Young Ladies 

“Y/N I don’t know about this. What if we get caught?”

“Come on Delia! Miss.McGee is too busy telling the tales of how she met Audrey Hepburn in that Jazz bar downtown once and how she’s going to meet her in LA and be in one of her movies. I’m sure she won’t miss us. Besides, we both have that enchantment down. We could do it in our sleep.” You say confidently, gently taking a hold of Cordelia’s hand as you drag her through the white spacious hallway of the academy towards the greenhouse. 

You stop just outside the greenhouse and step behind her slightly, placing your hands over her eyes you whisper quietly into her ear, “I know how much you like your plants and thought you’d like to see where the real magic happens,” you tease making her giggle at your well thought out pun, making you grin proudly. 

You guide her through the open wooden door and slowly remove your hands, watching as her brown eyes take in the room and gasp slightly, her hand touching her lips briefly.

“This.. is amazing! It’s no wonder why we’re not allowed in this greenhouse and have to use the other one,” she whispers. Her hand softly brushing the leaves of the nearest plant and slowly brings her nose close to it before inhaling. 

“Careful Delia, you don’t want to end up comatose.”

“Nor end up with really itchy red skin for a week like last November,” you both shiver at that memory before laughing. You touch her hand briefly with your fingertip, gaining her attention.

“You could have worn a plastic trash bag that week and I’d still thought you were the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” you murmured, watching as her pale cheeks turn a slight shade of pink and she bites softly on her top lip, smiling. 

“You looked after me the entire week, even bringing me those fresh berries from Myrtle’s secret fruit plants. I still don’t know how you got away with that, by the way,” she chuckled while you smirked almost smugly. 

“Well, I’m not the only daughter of the Wardwell family for nothing ya know?” You joke, but the mention of your family's name and reputation leaves a tense atmosphere and a sour taste to your mouth. Cordelia launches forward and wraps her arms tightly around your neck, burying her face in between your neck and shoulder, her lips brushing gently against your cool skin. Her warm breath hitting against your skin as she asks, “Do you think they’ll make you leave here? Leave me?”

You sigh sadly before replying as honestly as you could, not truly knowing yourself. 

“I dunno Lia, you know my grandmother has strict rules for me and my brothers. ‘You may study and live your life how you like, but the calling does not play by your youthful rules. Therefore, you must come home to train, to prepare for it’  blah blah blah. You know what she’s like Delia.” You sulk, leaning your head on top of hers briefly. She leans back slightly so she is eye to eye with you, leaning her head against your own she brushes her pink full lips lightly against yours in a gentle kiss, but before you can take it any further you hear footsteps outside the greenhouse.

 You both spring apart and scurry around towards the corner countertop and crotch underneath it, both sit pressed tightly next to each other, quietly watching intently at the black heels moving around the greenhouse before they disappear out of the door back towards the main building. You both giggle quietly before Delia kisses your cheek softly and whispers, “Promise you’ll stay with me.. Even if you have to go home. Promise you’ll be mine forever,”

“Lia I could never leave you baby. I love you with all my heart and no supreme will stop me from being loyal to you, not even your mother.” You reassure her before sharing a promising kiss. 

Both not truly understanding the power behind that promise and how it will soon be broken. 

***

Back to present day - One week after History Lesson.

The air around the council’s meeting is tense and leaves a bitter taste as the warlocks and witches bicker back and forth between themselves. Cordelia sits quietly throughout the ordeal waiting for them to finish their piece, her eyes locking with Myrtle from across the table. 

“How do you expect us to work together to face this new threat if you won’t even allow us the common decency of giving us the full information?” Behold Chablis sasses towards Zoe, making her retaliate. She stops at the sight of Cordelia raising her hand indicating for her to stop. 

“If you are all quite finished, the supreme would like to add her piece,” Myrtle exclaims, drawing the attention of the leaders around the table to look in Cordelia’s direction. She smiles thankfully to the red-headed woman before looking at each individual around the table. 

“As you are aware, there is a new threat among us -and I mean all of us-. Before we can move forward and let you in on what we know, we need to know that we can trust you.” she delegates, making her voice strong and assured. 

“Bitch please, after the ordeal with the witch hunters you're still gonna sit there on your high horse like some almighty and say you don’t trust us.” He scoffs while the other male council members nod and murmur between themselves in agreement. 

Before Cordelia could reply a loud bang echoed through from the front doors to the Ancestral room startling everyone as they all turn their heads towards the open archway door. 

A small woman stands confidently in the archway, her flowy black dress swaying slightly from the draft, her grey hair pinned perfectly in place. Two tall muscular men flanked either side of her with strikingly sharp features. The woman smirks slightly.

“If we are all done bickering like idiots, I would like for us to discuss the next form of action,” she addresses the table, her eyes moving to meet Cordelia’s who seems to freeze in place at seeing the familiar woman again. 

Y/N’s grandmother and brothers are here. 

But that must mean…

“Julianna, how lovely of you to join us. Please take a seat,” Myrtle speaks, standing from her seat in respect for the older woman. She smiles pleasantly at her before moving her eyes back to Cordelia, her head tilting slightly as a sign of respect. 

“Our supreme, it seems you requested our presence,” 

Cordelia gulps slightly before clearing her throat and standing, the warlocks and the rest of the coven council stay quiet, feeling the tension. 

“Mrs. Wardwell, what a pleasant surprise. Thank you for coming.” Her voice monotone, not trusting herself to say anything else. 

Julianna makes her way around the table and takes a vacant seat, the brothers remain standing behind her chair. 

‘Forever her loyal grandsons’ she has to hold back from rolling her eyes. Cordelia quickly casts her eyes towards the archway feeling a slight twinge of hopefulness. 

‘You think after all these years, she’d just turn up and help you after what you did to her?’

Cordelia thinks bitterly to herself.

“If you are looking for my granddaughter Mrs. Foxx, she’s running a little late,” Julianna says dryly as she examines her nails without a care in the world. Her emphasis on Cordelia’s married name does not go unnoticed by everyone in the room. 

Cordelia masks her irritation before replying, “It’s just Miss. Goode now,” 

The brothers behind their grandmother share a passing look at the new information, clearly surprised. 

“Yes well, I-” 

A cold breeze rushed through the room announcing a presence. There standing by the archway door, dressed in a black turtleneck dress and knee-high boots, it’s you. 

“Better late than never sis,” One of the brothers remarked, making them both laugh. 

You smirk slightly at their teasing demeanor before your eyes scan for those that you have longed to see since her wedding day, your supreme, Cordelia Goode.

“Hey, Lia.” You whisper almost shyly as you take her in properly for the first time. 

Her long blonde locks fall heavenly over her shoulders, her sharp jawline and full pink lips make her look like a goddess. Those wet brown doe-eyes that hold so much power are now locked onto your own as her chin jitters slightly as if holding back a sob. Everyone else in the room seems to disappear as you both keep your eyes on one another taking in every inch of each other. 

‘God she looks incredible’ you think unaware that she’s thinking the same thing.

“Promise you won’t leave me,” 

“I’m loyal to you Lia, always.”

“Hey, you” she finally speaks, her voice slightly stronger now remembering that there are others in the room. 

John Moore clears his throat before addressing the room. “As much as we love this bittersweet reunion, can we please move on? We could all end up dead if we don’t stop this darkness from consuming us all.” He says sarcastically. You both blush at the remark before Cordelia takes a seat back at the table. You make your way over to your grandmother and kiss her cheek in greeting while jabbing your brothers subtly with your elbow before sitting next to her. Cordelia’s eyes never strayed from your form. 

She’s here 

She’s home

***

After a few hours of delegating your next move on how to defeat this new threat, it's finally decided. The warlocks will continue to work close by combining their powers with the covens to strengthen the protection over both schools and its pupils. While Cordelia, Myrtle, Zoe and the other mentors work closely with Y/N and her brothers to track and find the source of the dark mist that seems to be kidnapping young potential witches and warlocks.

As the group departs Y/N gives her grandmother a quick kiss on the cheek in goodbye by the door, leaving Cordelia confused. 

“Are you staying?” 

You turn at the sound of that familiar angelic voice, your heart fluttering like you were 18 again. You fidget slightly and wring your fingers, feeling slightly uncomfortable with your feelings. 

“I... um I could go if you like? I just thought you’d feel safer with me here but that sounds silly now that I’ve said it out loud. I’m sorry, I’ll go and see if they have a room in the B&B by the French Quarter.” before you could fully turn around and head for the door, a soft hand wraps itself gently around your wrist making you pause. You turn around and see sad brown eyes and a worrying frown. 

“No don’t go, I think we need to talk.” She quietly says before letting go of your wrist and gesturing to her office. You follow dutifully behind her, your eyes straying downward taking her in, smirking at the slight sway of her hips in that tight black pencil skirt. 

“Eyes up, Miss. Wardwell. We don’t tolerate that kind of behaviour in my school.” She teases with slight flirtation in her deep voice making you gulp slightly before shaking your head. 

That woman will forever drive you crazy 

Doesn’t stop you from loving her any less though, does it? 

You make our way into her office. The medium-sized room still painted white with its high ceilings and the four high panelled windows set behind the very same desk that both, you and Cordelia, had been sent to on a number of occasions after being caught making out in the greenhouse after curfew back when you attended the school. You grin slightly thinking back to those events and from the corner of your eye, you can see Cordelia tuck her top lip into her teeth clearly thinking the same thing. 

“I see the desk hasn’t changed,” you tease trying to ease the situation. It seems to work as she chuckles slightly before heading to her desk chair and taking a seat. She gestures to the chair across from her, accepting the invitation you take a seat and straighten your posture before looking at her. 

“You should see the greenhouse, not a single brick has been changed.” You both frown slightly at that, remembering your special place where secret kisses were given and broken promises were made. You clear your throat before speaking: “Cordelia, I’ve been meaning t-” 

“I know you're my protector Y/N.” You gape at her taken back by her forwardness. Before she leans forward and reaches for your hand across the desk and like a woman in love you let her take it. Her gaze landed on your hands as she brushed her fingertips against it and spoke oh, so softly I barely caught what she said, “I regret it, you know? Meeting Hank, marrying him. You and I may have been young, but I knew somewhere deep down that my love for you was...is real. I shouldn’t have let you walk away. Away from me… from us,”

“Cordelia I-”

“Lia,” 

You frown

“You called me Lia before, I haven’t heard that name since,” she clarified.

“The day you told Hank ‘I do’ and I lost you seven years ago,” the words spilling out like word vomit which seems to have shook the pair of you. Her eyes cast down slightly at the confession as you both think back to that day. 

“I was ready to leave him that day, you know? I was so naive to think that I could leave with you and live this life away from all of this, away from your responsibility as a protector. The irony of it all is astounding really,” she chuckles humorlessly and you join her. 

“You did what you thought was right Cordelia, like you said we were young and in love we didn’t understand the real consequences of being who we are. Maybe it’s Satan’s way of getting us back together,” you tease trying to cover up the hopefulness in your voice. Her lips twitch slightly at that. You clear your throat trying to get back on track. 

“So this new threat, how serious are you talking? How many kids?”

“Enough. No one has seen a true physical form of this threat. It's like this dark mist that gathers and surrounds you, it takes away all of your senses leaving you wishing it killed you. It was so strong Y/N, I thought… I thought it was going to kill me,” she trembles at the mere thought; clearly remembering when it caught her last week. 

You move quickly from around the desk and towards her, hating to see her in such a state and feeling an agonizing amount of guilt for not sensing such power and being there for her to fight against it. You gently let her rest her head against your stomach before you place a hand on the side of her head keeping her close while she sobs into your arms holding on for dear life. 

After a few moments, Cordelia pulls away and collects herself while you croutch by her side not wanting her to look up at you any longer but for you to look up to her, like you have always done. 

“Why after all this time do you still look at me like I hold the stars?” She questions feeling vulnerable and insecure. 

“Because Cordelia Goode, you will always have my heart, your protector or not. My love lies with you, my loyalties lie with you, not the title you’ve been given,” she lets out a small sob before launching forward, cupping your face and kissing you desperately, needing to feel you again. 

It feels heavenly and familiar as you both kiss deeply. Cordelia’s hands pull slightly, indicating for you to stand. She pushes you against her desk as she nipples slightly on your bottom lip, your hands caressing her sides needing to feel her.  

You both sigh constantly as you pull away enough to lean your foreheads against one another, your noses lightly touching. 

“I promise Lia, I’ll protect you until my dying breath. Whatever it was, it will not touch a single hair on you again. You will always have me” You promise, your thumbs brushing against her soft cheeks.”But the question is, do you still want me?” You ask tentatively. 

“I’ve never stopped loving you Y/N. I promise we will get through this and once we do, I promise I’ll continue to make it up to you every single day for the rest of our time on this earth, long or short. I love you” 

With that statement you both lean towards each other and seal those promises with a kiss, completely unaware of a particular smiling red-headed witch swaying from side to side happily as she walks away from the office door and down the hallway. 

Finally.  

can you write cordelia x reader with 12. "My loyalties lie with you, not the title you’ve been given"

Yessss 1000×

I really wanted to write this one with cordelia in mind! I'll add it to the list x

[awkwardly-romantic]

3, 14 and 15 for patsy please! 🌻

Of course! ^.^

3 - Sleeping headcanon:

Patsy was always a fitful sleeper, first it was the trauma from the war, then it was the reoccurring nightmares, and once she met Delia it was fear of being caught. She always seemed to sleep with one eye and ear open. The first time she really slept the whole night through was after Delia and her got a flat together. She never thought she’d be the little spoon but the feeling of Delia’s strong arms around her and knowing the door was locked and they were safe, Patsy had the first completely restful sleep since she was 9. 

14 - Dancing headcanon:

Patsy learned how to dance from a young age, at her mother’s insistence she was trained in ballet and then classical dance. Her lessons were interrupted by the war but picked up again at her boarding school. It was in dancing with a beautiful older student that cemented Patsy’s attraction to women. (See “Teach Me Tonight” hehe)

15 - Singing headcanon:

Contrary to popular belief Patsy actually has a lovely singing voice, she just doesn’t share it much. Sometimes she’d be caught by Sister Monica Joan singing as she loaded her bag or cleaned her instruments, the older nun would always compliment her and encourage her to continue singing but Patsy was too reserved. 

The first time Delia catches Patsy singing was after going to see the Sound of Music (Patsy had a bit thing for Julie Andrews that Delia indulged). The early riser had gotten up to fix breakfast for their day off and was singing “I have Confidence” in her pj’s. Delia stayed quiet for the entirety of the song, watching in awe as Patsy hit every note perfectly, with a twinge of her posh accent. Much to the redhead’s embarrassment Delia applauded when she finished. 

From then on Patsy would sing for Delia if she asked nicely and promised a kiss or two in return.

When karaoke became a thing (Patsy is probably in her later 40′s) she became the reigning champ at their local pub nights. ^.^

Thank you for these! xxx

[dimsthings]

I just wanted to tell you that I think your Patsy and Delia fanfictions are amazing and really, really well written, so thank you for writing them.

Thank you anon! This was unexpected but lovely today.xxx

[vivaadult]

I can make all you're fantasys come true..xxx

My name is Delia HOT GIRL . Thank you for looking at my profile http://dlvr.it/PHSNmB