#thank you to the ppl who look out and msg me about these things <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[judilyart]

a lovely person told me about this account on insta that's pretending to be me and stealing my art,, please be careful when interacting with random accounts that might be scammers! report it if you can https://www.instagram.com/judily_artt?igsh=MjZmMHZqbXZvdnIz

I'm sure they're not the only one out there, unfortunately i cant do much other than report them when I'm aware of them and hope they dont scam anyone in my name. my carrd has all my own links and info!

[tojiscrack]

Hiii bestie, how are u? Hope u're having a good day/night/evening🩷🩷. Praying that college isn't sucking the life out of you ( as it did me 🫠).

GIRLLLLL the way ur fic liar liar WHIPLASHED the motivation t read back into me, you wouldn't even believe. I've been having a reader's block for over a year now and I DEVOURED this fic in 3 days in the midst of college midterms. It is INSANELY GOOD like girl you should be HELLA PROUD OF UR WORK. I do not think I have ever laughed as much as I did reading it. The helicopter scene had me shaking. I nearly pissed myself when they were playing dodge ball. Thank you for ur service queen 🙏🙏 ( I really needed that 😭)

I just wanna ask you a couple of questions

1. How is the gang dealing with sukuna's return every month , like do they lock him up in a shed like a werewolf ( my poor boy is getting possessed in every universe 😂) ?

2. Are we getting a nanami × miss B 😏😏 ( feed into my delusions pls I wanna see him happy at least in one universe 💔😭)

3. I know u said u're gonna delve deeper into the relationship dynamic between toji and satoru, but just in case would u consider hinting to their first ever meeting, I'm curious to know what was it that happened between them that had toji like " yeah I hate this man's guts" , I'm guessing it's gojo's big mouth tbh 🙄

4. YOU HAD ME THERE FOR A HOT MINUTE WITH THE TSUMIKI AND KAMO PLOTLINE EVEN THO I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE KAMO×Y/N FROM THE MOMENT U INTRODUCED KAMO. well played

5. Can I DM ( is that the right word for Tumblr still relatively new) u , probably gonna reread it soooo I'll have plenty to say ( proceed with caution tho , I LOVE to yap and I'll probably bombard u with msgs if agreed )

6. Can I be on the tag list if there's one 🙏

Anwss, sorry this was a bit lengthy. Thank you for this masterpiece again pookie and hope u're doing okay 🩷🩷

HIII mlll 🤭💞 college is absolutely kicking me right up the bum rn, but i took today off to kinda reset and recharge ‘cause the christmas break is soon! (i’ll keep you in my prayers, i hate being a college student ☹️)

you’re telling me that my story, the one i spent hours planning and writing out for shits and giggles, the one i spend randomly doodling about, a piece of work i produced… managed to get you out of a THREE YEAR LONG READING SLUMP? 😭

I DON’T BELIEVE YOU?? ‘CAUSE NO WAY 😭💞💗💜💝💘

UGH, I’M GLAD TO BE OF SERVICE?? ILY?? PLS DON’T DISAPPEAR??

‘you should be HELLA PROUD OF YOUR WORK’ — trust me, if i had any doubts before, they are gone now that i’ve been informed of your three-year-long-reading-slump having disappeared ‘cause of my 150k+ word fic 😳💖

you’re so niceeee and sweet and i’m just overwhelmed rn 😭☹️💗

‘i just wanna ask you a couple questions’ — 🤭 now i’m super duper excited 😋

1. how is the gang dealing with sukuna’s return every month?

i’m gonna touch upon this in one of the filler chapters i have planned (i could be wrong but i believe that it’s the chapter after the next one). honestly, they’re kinda just winging it 💀 the main idea is to keep yuji/sukuna in his room, barricade the doors and windows, and keep anything sharp out of sight 😭

and every month it gets worse and worse, sukuna just gets stronger and stronger, and there have been multiple occasions he’s tried leaving the room to enter wider society. you can imagine what would probably happen if he did manage to escape 🌝

2. are we getting a nanami x miss b?

this isn’t even a spoiler atp, we are absolutely going to get a nanami x miss b endgame 😋 idrk how i’m gonna go about it, seeing as this story is in y/n / megumi’s pov’s, so it’s a little tricky there but… eh, we’ll see.

i saw this one thing on tt where it showed nanami looking at some painting, a man and his wife settling down together, and he is getting his happy ending in this verse (even if some of the other characters here do not) 🤨 and there seems to be only a small community of ppl who actually ship nanami and that baker lady from canon. it’s not a major factor to me, but i do just so happen to be one of them 👀

3. would you consider hinting at satoru and toji’s first ever meeting?

in a bonus scene, perhaps? if anyone’s that curious, but there is some lore behind it, so it probably wouldn’t be small enough to fit in one bonus scene. if you’d like, i could do a separate oneshot on it when i have some free time! 😗 i have some drafts on a lot of scenes (regarding characters in the story) outside of the story, so we’ll see!

you’re actually half right about the reason behind toji hating satoru. half, ‘cause toji’s also to blame 😀 you’ll see what i mean lolol

‘YOU HAD ME THERE WITH THE TSUMIKI AND KAMO PLOTLINE EVEN THO I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE KAMO x Y/N FROM THE MOMENT YOU INTRODUCED KAMO’ — pls the realisation for everyone was the funniest time for me, it reminds me EVERY time of why i love being a fanfic author 😋 you’re smart for figuring it out before tho! a lot of people didn’t!

4. can you dm me?

OMG OF COURSE??? WHY IS THAT EVEN A QUESTION, MY DMs ARE OPEN FOR EVERYONE, SPAM ME IF YOU MUST, I LOVE TALKING TO EVERYONE 😭

we can talk about anything, literally. it doesn’t have to be the fic! i like learning about who you are, what you enjoy, etc.

5. can you be added to the taglist?

absolutely! welcome to the liar, liar family 🤭💝

DO NOT APOLOGISE ABOUT YOUR MESSAGE BEING LENGTHY, I’VE BEEN INACTIVE FOR A WHILE AND I’VE BEEN OVERWHELMED WITH COLLEGE WORK, BUT THIS HAS REALLY MADE ME MOTIVATED TO CONTINUE WRITING AGAIN, SO TYSM 😭💖💖

[eidolonightmare]

will make an acc soon when i can !!!! you use so kmany big words ur like a wizard casting spells . i like the last one the most , i dont know how to read with rhythm but it still sounds cool . i can imagine the few like music ppls i like singing it :3 very talented !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and i will most definately have you help me learn french in the future idf we are friends !!!!!! also THANBK YOU for the list i will take them thru out the night and let you know what i get :DDDDD i love quizzes tysm !!!!!!!! see for me i think i could listen to it and (maybe) read it well but NOT write and not speak ?? that goes for all languages tho

THE LAST TIME I WAS ACTIVE IN YANBLR WAS 2022 (I THINK) WHERE I HAD MY OWN ACC AND THEN SUMMER OF THIS YEAR WHEN I JUST KINDA LURKED LMAO , I WAS TOO SCARED TO MAKE POSTS BECAUSE THERE ARE A LOT OF POPULAR USERS I DONT LIKE AND I DIDNT WANT TO RUN INTO THEM OR THEIR MUTUALS , now i dont care AS MUCH but i still dont like a couple of them tbh

and i have no idea when i graduate . like none uhm .... im also homeschooled (/neg) so that will definitely contribute to if im even like able to . iiiiiiiiii have a slight feeling i might end up dropping out once i am seventeen sdjekjrfr but its okay . will live my house dog dream ^___________^

and i took computer science and i failed it ! so LMAO , U HAVE MY CONGRATS . my neocities is also bland-ish because i REFUSE to use iframes , FUCK that .

and yes i am currently replaying pkmn legends . this might sound silly but ive never finished a pkmn game . tbh story based games bore the hell out of me JDNFIJSRFIERK I CANT STAND TO PLAY THEM . THERYE FUN TO WATCH BUT BESIDES THAT BLEGH

i dooooont have much else to say tbh :P am very sleepy and tired and i doooont really like the tumblor ask system FNWEJFKWJRFK , u can msg me if you want /nf BUT THAT MIGHT BE AWKWARD ???? i dunno dude my social skills are comparable to like . i dont want to say an ant because ants have like tons of interactions but like . i dunno maybe a worm ........ do worms ,,, are worms talkative ? i mean im talkative i just dont know what the fuck im saying . also i think thats kinda funny because i am LITERALLY a dog and yet i have no idea how to interact with anyone or anything , but that is okay , im like one of those dogs who have their like "person" i guess . idk what the fuck im talking about dude .

anyway uhm YEAH feel free 2 msg me if u want but you dont have to because i ammmm not sure if it is an appropriate time to ask so . uhh u do what YOU want yes . yes . OKAY BYE BYE TAKIUNG UR QUIZZES - ALEX THE THE THE MAN BOY DOG WOLF CANINE IDFK MAN

sorry if this response is kinda dry i am Tired. but i wanted to respond.

alright awesome!! heheheh thank you i suppose. thank you! ^_^ i'm glad you liked it!!!

hehehe yippee awesome...!! great great i'm excited to see what you get. i hope you have fun taking them! yeah i get that. that happens to me, too. i think you just have to practice more when that happens honestly... and get more input so you feel more comfortable.

ahh yeah i get that lmfao. one of my friend's exes is on here and i have an ex on here so i'm trying to avoid them and their friends... lmfao. and another person i don't like. real.

oohhh yeah. i wouldn't recommend dropping out if it's possible for you to not because that's going to make things harder for you in the future but i won't judge you if you do or anything. because school is really hard T_T. dog house dream!!

fair tbh!!! some parts of that class were rly hard for me so i understand why that might happen T_T. also real. i just can't figure out how to make it look cooler; maybe i'll work on it some more.

yay awesome. also that's totally fair.

okie that's alright!! i'll message you then ^_^ hehe that's fair. i think i understand what you mean though idk how to describe it either, lmfao.

alright :D i shall message you. yippee taking my quizzes!! ^_^

[cloudslou]

okkkk sooooo let's go, brace yourself it's gonna be a long rant. (also sorry if i don't make sense, english isn't my first language)

i am a larrie too and most people i follow here are larries bc i kinda feel like they're a safe space you know? BUT the fandom can be so fucking tiring and annoying sometimes. not everything louis and harry do have to do with larry and that's okay!!!!!! (i know saying something like that can get you dragged to hell in this fandom...anyways. lol) not everything is an easter egg. not everything has to be interpreted (?) a certain way. i know it's fun to find little things in their music that are connected, i get the thrill. but sometimes it's too much, the fandom makes the most out of too little things and it's so ??????. my issue is mostly with how some people in the fandom view louis and his ideas and themes and stuff. let him have his fucking moment without connecting EVERYTHING, every single little detail of his art to harry. they are their own individuals and they have their own career and they make their own art. there are connections and parallels, someone has to be dumb not to see them but sometimes it's good to let them have something for themselves each. - i.e. i saw someone making the fitf ono about how harry had one too and blah blah married yeah we get it!!!!! but what the FUCK does louis promoting his album have to do with harry? what the hell does louis having one, two, whatever special concerts to promote his album have to do with harry? it's like, louis follows every step harry takes (i'm always speaking in terms of their career and art), he does whatever harry does, he doesn't have creative freedom (? not the right phrase but idk how else to say it sorry). it's like some people see his work as a copy of harry's, you know what i mean? this is not meant to be sorry for louis or to pity him, i know he hates that and i know you do too. it's more like, louis is his own person, OUTSIDE of the relationship!!! (as is harry of course), not everything he does has to be depended on the relationship or his partner, he has his own mind, his own ideas, his own creativity. he doesn't have to have anyone as a "step" where he has to be on to build his career (does that make sense?). he's gaining sooooooo much popularity and recognition, i know walls was successful, but this era is on another level. let him fucking have this for HIMSELF. he did that HIMSELF. it's kinda unfair to take that away from him by implying that everything he does has to do with anyone but him.

anyway, this is where the rant ends. didn't wanna make a post about it bc as i said, saying this stuff can get you dragged to hell in this fandom bc let's be honest, there are certain opinions that apparently everyone has to have. thank you for your time and patience. post it if you want, or not idk. of course i'd love to hear your opinion on this. byyeeeeee <3

anon im so glad u came back i was hoping to see a msg from u when i got home from class.

i think im largely on the same page as you!!! i consider myself a larrie and thats mainly who i follow and who my friends r, like thats my Circle in the fandom, but it can be very exhausting when its the only lens ppl use to look at their art. not only is it just a tad annoying, i think its pretty dismissive and reductive to take that approach every time. i have similar feelings abt taylor when ppl jump to immediately connect a song to her public life story and then dont go further. for me its like.... there is so much more to a song (or any piece of art) than its "true" meaning (and i say that liberally because even when larries connect on of hl's songs to the other or their real lives, this is no more "true" than connecting a song to a girlfriend, etc, i think there's too much certainty by fans in this fandom) and it limits ur enjoyment of a song i think to not push to break out of that box.

also i think people drawing connections between career stuff is mostly. connecting dots that arent there. one-off concerts are not a rarity and theres already differences in their album release shows. i dont follow many musicians super closely, but i believe ashe also had an album release show last month. and (iirc) lthq said these shows will be a mix of songs from walls and fitf (so it wont be a straight through play of the album like harry's ono show are).

[i-just-want-to-destroy]

i really love retry and ive probably read it for like 6 times already but idk if i should be happy when you update or feel sad because you said that it's a vent fic once :')

(by the way, how do you feel about retry getting so much traction? i know some fic authors dont like their vent fics getting popular... though retry is a really well-written and realistic au of an 'undying' deku so its fame is well-deserved. love your writing and i hope you are having a good day:)

thank you for your kind words, im happy you like retry. thanks for taking the time to msg me :)

the love that retry gets makes me happy and it means everything to me when people say they can connect with it. that being said some of the not nice comments do get to me sometimes. but i know its a good thing to get a lot of feedbacks. like while its just an anime fanfiction i feel very lucky to be able to read peoples thoughts on something that i make. and getting ART for it is just, a literal privilege.

but. the crazy influx of feedbacks do make me feel perceived lol. and pressured. i feel anxious about that fic. i used to really like reading comments (who doesnt) but for retry. i cant bring myself to look at them sometimes. but when i dont get comments im like ok this chapter is trash. LOL. this is a me problem <3 but its okay. i understand now that whatever u put out into the world—even if its just some anime ventfic—isnt in vacuum. ppl r gonna have thoughts about it whether u like it or not. its a good lesson to learn. another lesson is to just take a step back and do what i want because this is just an anime ventfic. etc

anyway sorry for the long insane answer <3 but thank you, pls have a great one, i hope ur enemies suffer

[ascaryghost]

Hey I’m the anon who asked about the 💩 and can I just say - THANK you SO much for being so open and honest about something like that because yeah it must feel so uncomfy to unconcerned those memories but I want you to know (if you don’t know already) how insanely helpful it is to read stories like that when you’re struggling with the ideas of “wanting to be sicker” - everyone always talks about how “you’ll be cold all the time!!! So boys will give u sweaters!!!” Nobody talks about the literal shutting your pants in public but because you’re exercising still not taking that as the cue to go straight home - literalky insanely helpful to read and I’m so proud of how far you’ve come in your recovery that you can flat out say “it wasn’t worth it” - I was half expecting the ask to not even be answered so I truly can’t thank you enough for sharing this 🌼🌼🌼you’re a fucking warrior and a champion and I LOVE you ❤️❤️❤️

yea it was honestly no problem sharing that story and i think its rly important as well. and yea istg boys were scared of me (which hm, tbh kinda pog at least they stayed away lol /hj) and did defintily not give me their sweaters, in fact i had to suffer in the winter when the stupid boys opened the classroom windows and i sat there dying of coldness. And the ed coldness isnt glorious its like u literally have no body heat. to anyone who haven't gone through it, think of it like this - everybody has a small little fire deep inside, so even when ur in cold weather ur not cold all the way through. ed cold u dont have that fire and coldness just completely fills you and runs through you and you would do literally anything to get warm again but no amount of layers is enough because really what you are missing is internal warmth and its rly rly rly horrible.

but abt the recovery part, ive gone through recovery but im relapsed like i just wanna make it rly rly clear that what im doing isnt recovery and im def not in a healthy mindset like pls dont do what im doing. i went through recovery and relapsed so that + my experiences w hospitalization and literally being at death's door made me have a very complicated relationship with my ed. like i feel like im rly good at being like "ok no no no we need to fucking eat something rn." like pulling myself up when i go to deep etc cause i never ever wanna go back to where i was before my failed recovery and i know this is what every person with an ed says and then fucking die like years later but i honestly feel like im good at handling my ed so i dont go too deep. Like i dont have any desire to be bonespx because i have been and it sucked, i dont feel invalid bc i dont 'look anorexic enough' like a lot of ed ppl do etc. But yea the sick thing abt eds is that even though u know what ur doing isnt worth it and unhealthy you can still keep getting pulled back into it tbh i have to remind myself a lot of how things used to be to keep myself from falling down the hole. as soon as i find myself looking at bxnespo and thinking "waittt actually..." i have to just stop and make sure i don't go deeper. Anyways my point was pls everyone practice harm reduction this way too, not only keeping something sweet with you in case u feel dizzy etc but please practice it in your mind too. You have to do everything you can to stop yourself from falling too deep into this.<33 pls <33

anyways i love you too even though idk who u are but you seem like a wonderfully sweet person and im sorry all my answers are so long and rambly but like i dont wanna half assedly answer these things bc they are so important i feel like i rly need to explain them thoroughly to make sure nobody gets the wrong msg etc.<3

[charlie-minion]

charlie-minion(.)tumblr(.)com/post/635987979304943616/could-the-same-spn-finale-make-a-little-more-sense Hey Love! Thanks for such an amazing post! It was still hard for me personally to deal with it for many reasons, but when you mentioned "yeah well we gotta work around Dean dying so let’s work around Dean dying then, stay with me" i understood why u went where u went with it. I just wanted to ask your opinion/suggest/question few things if u don't mind. 1) I can see Dean's speech (1/9)

“If we don’t keep living, then all that sacrifice is gonna be for nothing” make sense, except in psychlogy grieving and remembering people who died is not the same as not letting go. I feel this point could be GREATLY improved if we saw some memorabilia in bunker around Cas (without Dean paying much attention to them or being sad about them (2/9)

[?Miracle running to him for cuddles with mixtape in mouth and Dean freaking out about how it’s the best dog ever cuz he loves Led Zeppelin or sth, idk I’m making it up as I go with examples, dont mind me?]) and would either see that Dean is still grieving while working on letting go (not bc he can’t let go, but because grieving is a process and IT IS HEALTHY to grieve. Too many ppl are shamed for needing time to heal(!!) while it’s actually personal and normal and we know Dean doesn’t (3/9)

just insta forget (from experience), and grieving has more to do with emotionality and less with not being able to let go). OR we could be shown in some way that more time passed and he did already get to heal from grief. That would save Dean from seeming suddenly uncaring and emotionless (especially while knowing Cas is in super hell for eternity, not just ‘dead whatever it means’, and considering Dean WAS in hell and knows it’s not ‘fun and games’) towards anyone who isn’t his brother. (4/9)

I realize episode is Sam centered, but this picks huge focus on Dean by omission. 2) I feel it doesn’t matter so much whether Sam picked phone to call as that he easily decided to give up on calling while he could still stay with Dean, listen to him and continue to make the call. That death took like 7-8 minutes of the episode. The phone should be left in the car for example, it being crushed during fight is lame and cheap, but any excuse would be better than (5/9)

“Ok I guess I’ll stop calling and let u die, don’t tell me I didn’t try”. 3) That whole “I love you so much” really hit me hard when I was watching, while I fully agree with the point you made, I feel like adding “so much” was just too passionate. As you said, he needs to say it to Sam before anyone else. "I love you, my baby brother” – second part already makes it valuable and emotional. It does no business being passionate. He is dying (for a while now) adding words that don’t (6/9)

need to be there makes viewer question “Is he rly going to die? He seems to have no problem flowering his words” and to me at least felt like going from 0 (unability to say ILY) to million which just took me from the situation totally as I was questioning if I’m watching the right show/character. It’s like if Dean went to Sam in episode 1 about finding his dad, we would be informed just how relations between Dean and John looks like, and next episode they would go for burgers (7/9)

and Dean would be like “Yeah I got bored of looking for him” and show would end… 4) Also MoTW not being from journal would make world of difference. That’s a callback that rly puts the story back to years before and Dean dying finishing his father’s job seems like a joke in rly bad taste. That’s all that crossed my mind I think. What do you think about those? Sorry for a long msg. I can try to send it via phone in one piece if you would rather. I’m really interested in your opinion on it. (8/9)

I know you were trying to fix stuff with as small changes as possible in your post, but I felt those also were just small things that would mean world to fans and story. Thank you so much for giving yself to the fandom, you’re my all time favourite writer since I remember <3 (9/9)

Hey! Sorry again, I'm the anon from yday with that long question. I just felt it was worth adding: "“Dean is focusing on the task at hand. His attitude, as Ackles puts it, is, “I’m not going to think about what I’ve lost. In turn, I’m just going to focus on what I can fix.” That leads Dean down what Ackles calls a “hopeless road.”" (it’s interview about s13). Just to point out hopelessness in stopping yself from thinking of who u lost to forcefully direct yself to the future. :D 

Hello, Nonnie! Sorry it took me so long to answer. The post you are referring to is this one: Could the same SPN finale make a little more sense with some additions/changes?

I didn’t write that as the kind of finale I would want. I did it to prove the finale could have been the same: pandering to general audience, w*ncest and destiel shippers alike, while still keeping some sort of logic regarding the build up of the story. It didn’t have to be so bad, but it was, and it looks intentionally bad, if I’m being honest. Maybe it was better that way, because it made it easier for us to simply ignore the existence of it. 

Regarding all the points you sent in your messages to me, I’m just gonna post them all together because they seem interesting, but I don’t really want to spend more time thinking about a finale that already hurt me enough. The only two posts I’ve written about the finale were for me to cope, to kinda heal and let it go. Now I just pretend it never happened. I’m glad you had some space to vent and I’m posting your messages so others can read the whole thing and maybe let comments if they want to agree or disagree, but that’s all I can do. 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me and the fandom as well. Everything that helps us heal is valid. *hugs*

[alias-b]

OKAY. So, I wasn’t gonna dignify this with an answer, but I’m feeling super good and starting my vacation and have few things to lose tbh. I blocked you, but you’ll find a way back if you feel this is really worth it.

You certainly found it worth it enough to slap that anon button to insult me and dress it up as idk ?? being helpful & even kind in your mind?? If you followed my fics, you know the nasty msgs I get monthly so why would I take a personal jab as from a good place? Why would anyone mean to act “holier than thou” ???? Telling me you’re not coming from a bad place....yet you still went anon bc you knew how this read. Hm. Anyways....to answer, I’ll just unpack this neatly:::

1) ???? When did I say ANY of that even in a talk down/negative context??? lmao I even searched my asks trying to find myself being this rude. Slide into my DMs and let me know bc from my POV, you’re blatantly misreading something or making it up?? I’m confused and of course, I’d never want to come across any kind of way like that! If I ever mention young ppl, I mean actual teenagers in fandom spaces that adults get nasty interacting with. Ppl in their 20s/30s+ really need to be mindful about interacting with ppl under 18 and attacking them or being creepy and inappropriate with them/their content. Don’t twist my words.

Ppl who write thin OCs still get hate on their fics lmao, I did. But they don’t get constant hate generally based on their size or race. ((Also like...we’re all aware of fatphobia & racism in fandom and what types of OCs/characters are targets for that...esp if they’re being paired with favs... Writers of color are absolutely also allowed their frustrations with racism in fandom spaces btw too. Do not talk over them. Just listen and be aware. Do your best.))

2) I absolutely DO NOT think I’m better or “more moral/braver” than any other writer on here wtf, I consider myself even “still young” and learning... I’m in my 20s, I’m not a fandom gma trying to police anyone??? As long as you’re living your best life, surrounded by the best content YOU want, go tf off, sis!!! We’re all in a pandemic here trying to get by.

Writing is always a growing process and we’re doing it for free, it’s not perfect and always is a skill that gets better as we do it. I try not to compare myself to others, my fics are mine and that’s IT. I’m allowed to be proud of what I’ve created and I encourage all writers to do the same. A lot of writers are happy and patting themselves on the back for what they created but I’m NOT taking digs or doing it cause I think I’m some brave crusader on a mission. I’m too tired for that bull. I don’t get/want cool points for anything. Have you sent these concerns to any one else for doing the same??? Or are you irked I’m trying to uplift MY fat character?? That I get constant hate for??? More reflection for you.

3) I’ve been incredibly supportive of OCs of all shapes and sizes. I’ve gotten asks shading thin/white “model” ocs and only ever preached patience and support to all oc writers bc it’s never right to bring someone down to lift someone else up. It’s never right to shame a writer not hurting anyone. All OCs are good OCs. That’s the point I always make!! Writing is hard. Finding face claims is hard. Making whole ass humans for a fictional world is hard. So, I’m constantly posting/replying to be open and understanding with writers, whatever they do. It’s their fic. Their characters. Their choices. All OCs are valid.

No one is obligated to make a specific type of OC, just make the OCs you want to see. I don’t think it’s right to hate or shade ANY writer/OC and I make it clear in asks that try to suggest otherwise. Maybe go reread them before slapping that brave anon button again to come from ‘a good place.’

4) Evie is ONE of FIVE OCs I’ve written on this account. And the only plus size OC of them too so IDK why I’d ever act ‘holier than thou’ about a SINGLE OC when the numbers are 1 of 5 here... I’m not gifting the fandom the gift of me, I’m just writing content I enjoy. I’m gifting it to my damn self. There’s no crusade. There’s no BIG STATEMENT UWU. She’s not some political piece, y’all can be so dehumanizing with that toward fat characters or characters of color. Just let them exist proudly. If you don’t like it maybe they’re really not for you!

Evie’s literally just a character I created that I adore. Fat characters exist and they can be whatever we writers want. If people feel represented by her, I think that’s amazing and I so so appreciate when I’m told. It’s a special thing to see yourself represented when you never do in fandom or mainstream spaces!! She represents parts of me too that I’m still learning to love. But if not, I’m sure she’s still relatable. She has a whole personality beyond being a plus size girl bc being fat is not her defining trait. We absolutely should encourage more positive diversity in fandom, esp in main characters. Everyone of all sizes writing about what they look like is awesome! We agree on that point!

5) Evie is one of five ocs. Again. I’ve gotten hate messages and passive aggressive comments for all three of my big fics. Evie has ONLY EVER gotten hate for her size and race. She’s gotten a LOT.  ((sometimes her eating disorder, but that’s another issue)) And yeah, it doesn’t shock me. It’s too transparent. People who relate to her don’t deserve that shame either.

I hadn’t even started posting the actual fic before I got my first hate msg about her being an “oc reach bc billy hates fat chicks” whatever. So I think I’m allowed to defend and stan her that much harder and her role in this fic. I think I’m allowed to gush about how much I love her story against all the disgusting hate she gets. I’m not apologizing for that. Me loving Evie super hard has nothing to do with anyone else’s OC. It’s not a mission. It’s not a dig. She’s mine.

**So no, anon, I don’t think I’m doing any big, in your face, public service with my ONE plus size oc. I don’t think I’m better. I think I’m just creating content for myself to enjoy. If others enjoy it too, awesome!! If not, they’ll find something else to enjoy. It’s a big space with lots of amazing writers, I can even direct you to a few!!! I’m happy to do that!! ****If I really had an issue with white or skinny ocs....I wouldn’t be writing them myself which I DO. I wouldn’t be supporting my fellow writers who also write them!!

So you’ll excuse me if I don’t believe that you actually support Evie or me or my fics. All this message served to do was dwindle an author’s excitement for her OC and accomplishments. And you didn’t do that. I’ll try even harder to support fellow writers around me tho!! ^_^

If this is a big misunderstanding bc you misreading asks that I’ve gotten or you misread my tone or remarks anywhere, that’s really not my issue either. IDK, maybe I’m popping off too much too, but this accusation is truly mean-spirited. I know things don’t always translate over the internet well, but I’ve been openly loving and supportive to fellow friends and authors despite anything that’s been said. Even through laundry lists of passive aggressive and hateful messages about my stories since my first fic took off. I’ve seen friends get hate too and I can’t stand that they have to deal with that. They SHOULD be proud of their works always.

I know I don’t deserve them and I know I don’t deserve this either. I know who I am at the end of the day and I know what I put into the world and I know that my fics are mine first. I know my truth and I hope you know yours behind that anon button.

So, thank you for your concerns but please drop them somewhere else and have a wonderful day enjoying the free content we put out. Support your favorite writers and encourage all writers to keep doing what they love and getting better at it! Thanks!!! xoxo :)))

[jensungf]

I saw this and want to ask you too because you are a cutie pie, assign your mutuals a member from nct dream!!

oh my gosh THANK YOU anonnie!! i’ve been dying to do this actually hehe i thought no one would ever ask <33 thank u ur a cutie pie as well

disclaimer: i literally have SO many moots so if i dont do u please dont take any offense! i’m trying to do ppl i talk to a lot bc its a lot easier since i have a better grasp on ur personality but if ur a moot and u want me to assign you a member from dream lmk <33 also if mine is inaccurate im so sorry I SUCK at this and im struggling so much hhhhh

@markeussi​​ / anie: my precious loml anie i think u remind me a lot like jaemin or sometimes jisung bc ur very caring and precious <3 like u notice peoples feelings and do ur best to take care of them! ur very warm and affectionate and u have an effect on everyone honestly and so much love to give,, and a bit of jisung bc i feel like u have a lot of thoughts about the world but even so u know how to have fun and joke around but ur very hardworking and would do anything for others <3

@neostains / mary: ok so i def think of mary as jeno bc she looks super intimidating at first and jsjsj for the longest time i was scared to talk to her and even when i did was like ((am i annoying)) but shes actually super sweet and thoughtful and she has bad-ass vibes bc she has confidence in herself that i rly admire bc she takes no bs even tho deep down shes lowkey a softie as well <3 

@j-woosderland / amanda: amanda gives me renjun vibes fo sho!! and jeno too haha i alr told her this before but its bc she is so good with words and she knows what to say without sugarcoating it and shes honest yet kindhearted. shes hardworking but also shes the person to prefer to stand and laugh w her friend and just be a comforting figure in the back who everyone can trust and rely on <3 overall tho i see her as renjun

@nanasarea / nana: oh my gosh not to be cliche but nana is literally like a second nana/jaemin bc shes super caring and kind and affectionate and i honestly see her as a motherly figure whos always looking out for everyone and she has a heart of gold!! shes super easy to talk to but also they allegedly both share the same brain cell when it comes to the concept of time and math hehe

@lideria / dilara: honestly i think that dilara gives off jeno vibes bc i see her as a comforting figure who i can always turn to if i have worries and also a bit of jisung bc shes very introspective and mature. also i believe that once she opens up and becomes comfortable with a person which might not be very easy, if she truts you then she’ll be so much more open and expressive and free (like jeno’s trustworthiness + jisung’s initial reserved nature but openness)

@sichengsgf / lanie: honestly lanie reminds me a bit of chenle who brings up the mood whenever she’s around and she has so much appreciation for everything in her life not to mention shes very sweet and just kind of a bright person who despite all the things that might happen remains positive about so much in her life and i rly appreciate her updatesor just hearing about her day cus its relaxing and i feel like chenle isnt the most talkative either but lanie can do both cus theyre both people ppl lol 

@gohyuck / raya: hmm honestly i kinda struggled with this for a bit but i believe that raya is super chill and laidback and she likes to go with the flow like chenle! shes an extrovert but not always SUPER talkative but she loves to help bring ppl out of their shell cus shes always vibing hahah and also her strong moral compass leads me to mark haha hes very hardworking and he does whats best bc he knows how to be a leader but also a teammate and he knows how to let loose

@glossyjaems / louna: i think louna is a lot like hyuck bc shes the type of person to be very expressive with the ppl she cares about and is comfortable with but i feel like in the nicest way possible she needs attention!! and she deserves all the attention in the world <33 she loves bringing ppl tgt (aka w the discord server) and while shes talented she holds herself up to high standards like hyuck lol 

@heyy-sicheng / kara: oh my gosh my lovely beb i see her a lot as chenle bc shes very bright and sweet and adorable and i love her a lot like i bet if i heard her laugh the whole world would light up and if we met chaotic energy everywhere and screams in the street but also she has a kind of energy where i feel like shes not the most talkative but she has a way w supporting and uplifting the ppl around her to make them feel loved and comfortable and shes so humble!! shes very successful w 1k followers but she is so so humble about her achievements

im kinda super tired so i didnt do anyone else ;-----; but if any of my moots r curious just send me a msg in my inbox and ill be more than happy to match u w a dreamie!!! <333333 

[6ad6ro]

how do u make friends and become a "personality" on tumblr? i dont mean being tumblr famous, im just pretty lonely. asking u since u seem to have a few

oh gosh i’m surprised you think of me as havin friends n bein a tumblr personality! that’s kinda a compliment so ty! tho lol i might not be as popular as u think tbh? tho i guess i have an okay number of followers and the ppl i’m close to on here are SO AWESOME n i love them? BUT OKAY! i’ll tell u how i went about makin friends on tumblr! btw don’t be afraid to dm me like i’ll be your friend! i’m super shy but like rly friendly so?? ANYWAYS here’s what i did:1. be yourself even if you think ppl won’t like you. you rly shouldn’t care about the ppl who don’t like u bc they’d prob never like you? and being urself helps you feel good about yourself and is REALLY attractive to ppl who might end up following you. be real. it’s your blog, so don’t, for example, let some mean anon tell u how to run your blog.2. that doesn’t mean being insensitive tho! i’m constantly tryin to be as fuckin nice as i can within reason. and oh yeah tag stuff like “flashing” or “nsfw” or “gore” etc even if you use custom tags (i use “h” for nsfw bc i don’t wanna get flagged lol). and don’t repost stuff on here without direct permission. it’s like stealing. and don’t delete captions off of original art (but u can remove a rebloggers captions all day).3. post your own “content” whether it be text posts or pictures u took or art u make or edits or finds off other sites! even if u think it’s too dumb, i promise u there’ll be a buncha ppl who will like it. i thought my gifs were trash and then one day one wound up on tumblr’s “radar’ (or whatev it used to be called). MAKE SURE U TAG YOUR POSTS. it’s fine to not tag reblogs unless they’re something ppl are sensitive about (flashing,gore). it’s fine to just reblog other’s stuff btw like ppl still love blogs like that (that’s most of tumblr tbh).4. your follower count doesn’t matter. the number of notes on posts you make don’t matter. it’s so easy to fall into viewing those numbers as a sign of “how cool u are/how much ppl like you”. don’t start posting things u don’t care about just bc u notice ppl like it. just be yourself. ppl will come anyways.5. talk to people. write little comments on ppls posts. respond to ppl. take the risk and direct message someone (be considerate tho. like if u have a crush on someone don’t open with “i wanna fuck u” lol). if you want friends, be friendly.6. THIS IS IMPORTANT THO. tumblr is easily the shyest community i’ve ever encountered. and this is coming from someone who has agoraphobia (or rather a fear of people). even if someone follows you back and likes all your posts… they might not respond to you. THAT DOESN’T MEAN THEY HATE U OR DON’T CARE. a lot of them just… can’t? ur msg very easily made them really happy. sometimes ppl like that just need time. i won’t lie, of the hundreds of ppl i’ve tried to start conv with? maybe only 10% of them even replied. if you’re like me the voice in ur head will tell you “oh they hate you you weirded them out ur awful”. ignore that dumbass voice. that 10% who responded? or responded later? are some of my best friends on here. IT’S ABSOLUTELY WORTH IT.take the risk. talk to people. rejection can hurt, but it’s just like a little scratch compared to the gushing wound we cause ourselves by not trying. see, look at this stupid long unintelligible post i just wrote. and i somehow still have a bunch of friends and followers? i’m a huge idiot, but turns out that everybody else is too thank god. so just be yourself and have fun!oh and it takes time btw. like i’ve been active on here since 2012 lol. give people time to find u and respond to you. hope it helped even if it was just a little!

[nivks]

i feel like #followforevers and online love letters etc etc havnt really been a thing in 2018 but u know what. thats dumb. 2019 is better and were all gonna be emotional and loving towards the people that make us feel emotions speciffically - Love! so heres a #followforever emo loveletter ashdfg gahwahh OKAY EDIT: kjhsdf i finished writing this mess and its SO LONG i am SO OSRRY i cant even SPELL im so sorry whatever im gonna post it still cos maybe hopefully simething i have to say mihgt make someone smile. just skip to ur namee. happy 2019 kids! nick WILL become a dad!.

@harryfeatjack @rightgirl @happilygryles @rocketmommy @19-million-memories @drugsnotwar @ithadmefromhello @spyro2018 @acuzena @carswinky @shiftylinguini @bourgeoix @hiatusniall @julesg @itsallaboutzarry @ihavea1dbloghelp okay we might have been close but you dont post much anymore, we might be new mutuals or like?? might just have that special follow and love from afar type thing happening but you all do make my dash a happier place and i hope 2019 is incredible for u all and u are all amazing people who do brighten my day. thanks for making 2018 better!! love u. 

@chantillystars Miss Starsadrift, lover of my hart. ur so fucking BRIGHT andsweet and u always make me laugh and ur always there when im crying and u light up whatever place youre in and i know that for a fact cos when we went on holidays together you honest to god were like. the brightest and beautifulestestest in the whole street. youre also an excellent cook and the kitchen we were in was just shit. love ur snaps and msgs and how much you love gardens and flowersand sunshine. glad youve been working on feeling better about Life and its been helping cos u deserve it alllll <3<3 love u like u love yoongi. 2018 wouldve been terrible without u. @clipsandstuff your tags at times make me crack up and your love for nick is so warm and iv followed ur blog for years and youre always so consistently lovely and i hope 2019 treats u well <3 @ladsfm you barely ever have time to be on anymore but youre like. out there. living your life and i see u on instagram and ur so incredible and SMART and beaiutful and then whenever i text you a #nickupdate or more specifically a #harrynickupdate your all caps replies always make me smile so big also you are quite possibly the most lovely person iv met i lvoe you! @lordendsavior i made my url dikolasgrimshaw. for you. for me a bit too but you were that final little push. the voice of reason that said yeah! do it! thats how much i love you. akjsg anyway JOANNA you are somehow so lovely and kind but like Real at the same time and u have a way of saying your opinions that makes me wish i knew how to fucking get my thoughts out as put together? as you. idk everytime i see you like giving advice and stuff im always like YUORE SO good you really are just! so good for this world and the people you talk to. i hope everyone knows how lucky they are that gets to talk to you and stuff ily. @cashewdani your tags. iv been following your blog since like? 2013? and i have no idea what your look like and im only guessing where youre from and what youre name even is but pretty much every post you make has incredible tags and has inspired me to watch movies/tv shows that i use to skip over and you are alawys so fucking delightful to see on my dash and i feel like everytime i see you posting it brings a smile to my face. also youre writing is incredible and i feel like iv seen you posting about new jobs and new living places so i hope 2019 is super amzing for you cos you deserve it! @yourghostcat <3<3<3<3<3 gamZE you are! you ar so bright and loving and warm and sweet and gentle and FUNNY and i feel liek every single time we talk im alawys just like ‘i love you gmze’ but honselty i DO and i hope u know youre super important and im so glad i know you. every single on of youre edits are beautiful and all the work u put into them is so appreciated and ur so talented! i hope 2019 is so good to you <3 @sehunchis u barely go here anymore but im including you anyway whocares KELLY i love you. your love for vivi?? feel that. love for vivi and sehun togeth? fukcing Feel that. youre so funny and rly smart and thoughtful and u make ppl so happy by just being there and i miss being in new york with you but seeing ur tweets still makes me smile just as biggggggg lvoe you. @lollipop-popsx youre so damn funny whenever youre done with anons purposely trying to start shit but you are so so lovely to everyone else and u pretty mch always come across as genuinely happy and caring and i rly hope that you have a super amazing 2019 love uou. @fullstopmgnt again u dont go hre anymore but just in case! i LOVE you and im so GLAD ur doing better and feeling better and working on getting even better im proud of you my lovely. miss u i WILL see you soon i have gifts for youuu @meliora i was gonna say i got to hug you TWICE this year but dunkirk came out in two thousand and seventeen im a fool whatever i got to hug you ONCE this year and while thats not really a lot its still!! im so happy i got to meet u cos ur SO FUKCING lovely and beaituful and warm as a person and so chill and have such good taste in music and hair colours and i know theres been some tough times this year for you but you deserve the fucking world so i hope 2019s nothin but great stuff ILY @baaatgurl bby gir lover darling MARIE light of my life. u are! incredible and i feel like whenever we meet up im laughing and smiling constantly and even when were not together i can like. listen to audio messages u send me and even when im sad i know i got something to smile about cos ur right there! u mean a lot to me and im so so so happy we met on this dumbass website in like 2013 youre so so so important. shits been tough but 2019s gonna be The Year and 2020? were leaving australia together. @cptkirked finish the walking dead. ALJHFGLDS okay FOR REAL first of all thankyou for making me watch love actually WAIT did i tell you! when u and me watched it and my brother was like ‘that movies terrible’ HE TXT ME LIKE 2WEEKS AGO and was like ‘just rewatched love actually. i get you both now. was good movie.’ ghhhhhahh i think ur relaly great and u always make me laugh and from your tweets i feel like youve had an up and down year so i rly hope 2019s good for you in every single way cos u really deserve it. love u. @nightandstarlight milesssss we havnt talked too mcyh this year but knowin youre out there living youre life! just happy. thankyou for alays been sweet and kind and positive and making me smile. hope 2019 is beautulf for you. @plaintoast TAELOr i know 2018 has definyely had highs and lows for you but 2019 IWLL be great and u deserve honeslty SO MYCH happiness and i hope u get all of it. u are so soft and lovely i lvoe u truly. @gettingdizzy giggled when i saw your url just then dont know why. SAVANAH do u have any idea how incredble u are? ur so important and ur texts like 90% of the time make me laugh and the other 10% i wanna like fight someone on your behalf. ur smile is 100/10 and i can not wait till the day we get to MEEt. ur gonna fuckign graduate this year and finish school and 2019s really gonna be your year and i love u so mcuh. @twelvegrimmyplace LIZ! LIGHT OF MY life. u are one of hte most beautiful and funniest and ur so fucking Good and lovely and always make me smile. u also make me laugh a lot and i lvoe ur tags and ur love for nick and nick and m/esh and nick and Glasses is the reason why 2019 has to be a good year. thankyou for ebing you. love you. @erinsbreakfast cheesed real hard with my smile then as i typed your url. thankyou for always making me smile big time and making me LAUGH and thanks for loving nick the way u do. ur super sweet and super beautful and i hope 2019 is everything u dream it to be. ur incredible and i voel you. @silveredsound YOU are BEAUTUFUL and always alawys making me smile with your tags and posts and ur heavenly pictures of Harry Styles and Harry Styles’ Hair in HQ and ur thoughts about nick gshaw. thankyou for being you and i hope u know how amazing u are. i love you. happy 2019 darling. also thnakyou for the gift that was TOWEL FIC. ur a hero. and ur wrtiing is!!!!!! stuff of dreams ur so talented hoenslty @magog83 ur literally the hero that goes above and beyond for the whole nick fandom and we will never be able to thankyou enough. you are increbible and amazing and lovely and you deserve so mych happiness and good things. thaknyou for so mych youre BEAUTIFUL. @junkshop-disco every single cow i pass by in my day to day life i automtically name mabel. ur posts make me smile and ur so lovely and kind. you are so fucking talented. i hope 2019s super super lovely fro you. @kilimiria !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! mariE!!!!!!!! do u KNOw how big i smile whenever i see i have msgs from you? okay i know it takes me forever to reply a lot of the time but like literally msgs from you can turn my whole day from shit to the happiest of days. thanks for existing and being you na dmaking me smile u are sososo lovely and funny and beaitufl and i hope 2019 gives you the entire world. i lveo you. @apopstarontheradio thakns for making me smile a lot this year and being funny! and kind and lovely and having a big heart. hope 2019 beings u nothin but happiness loverlyyyy @thegreenaubergine i love YOu you make me laugh and make me smile and ur so so sweet and so lvoely i really relaly hope 2019 is great for you!!!!!! @hinickgrimshaw everytime i see u posting amd ur tags i feel like. ur just really great and amzing. sounds lame typing it out auhfhahhhhh BASICALLY everytime i see you saying things and read ur tags on nick posts im just like ‘youre SO good i trust everythignu say.’ youre so so lovely and u make me smile and im pretty sure i have a screenshot of a post u made once cos it made me smile on a bad day. anwyay i hope 2019 is GREAT for u and i think ur fucking incredible and ur love for nick is so soft. @writsgrimmyblog i smiled at your url like you could see it or someting kjhasdk WRIT u are. so organised and smart and FUNNY and beautiful and LVOELY and i am soossoso lucky to know you. youre nick thoughts and posts are a joy to read and ur writing is incredible and u made grimmy appreciation fest happen whcoh was!!!!!!! i Love you. 2019 better be the best for you <3 @fapfapfashion ayhhhh!!!!!!! ZHENya. i thnk i first saw you when u started leaving anon msgs for joanna you ARE so so so soft and kind i love you so much. you ALWAS make me laugh and you have some of the best tags and i hope everyone that knows you in real life knows how lucky they are to know youuu LOVE you a lot. hope 2019s super freakin amzing. @blueskybuzz77 youre so sweet and lovely and i hope so much good happens fro you in 2018 also u make me laigh and u deserve the WOrld LOVE you @fantofirehazard ur lovely and super sweet nad ur tags make me laugh and  i hope 2019 is increible for you because you deserve it a lot <3 

@grimshaw @brckhmptn i would die for you.

[gayestnerdsinfiction]

You’re one of my favorite writers I’ve ever encountered during my two decades on this planet. I could go on and on about what I love about your writing and story telling style but these msgs don’t give nearly enough room for that. Ive reread many of your fics over&over again and think of them outside the internet. I’ve had your blog notifications turned on since I started following but I took a break from tumblr for a while so I haven’t been keeping up as much. It makes me very sad that you (1)

have fallen out of love with fanfic & u feel that people aren’t appreciating your writing recently. I’m out of state at the moment so I’ve only read a few chapters of iata so far but as soon as I’m home I’m reading all of it and I can already guarantee I’m going to love it. I wish I weren’t only one person so I could give your writing the exposure and recognition it deserves. (2)

Even if you decide to stop writing or updating this blog in the future I hope you know I deeply appreciated your writing. Your presence on the internet has been a blessing!! I’m sorry you’re feeling discouraged lately but remember that your writing is for you, don’t ever let it be a source of unhappiness. I will never know you but nonetheless I adore and admire you bcs of this blog. I could go in and on but I’ll only get more cheesy. Thank you for everything ❤️❤️❤️ I wish the best for you (3)

ahbdshfgsfh thank you so much that truly is such a kind and heartwarming thing to hear in these trying times. and i just want to take a moment to say that i know i bitch and moan a lot but the feedback i DO get is usually positive and like every once in a while ppl do send nice messages and stuff to tell me that they like my writing and i want all those ppl to know that they do not go unnoticed or unappreciated! i see u and i love u all and i am so honored that u read and enjoy my work

i do still like writing fanfic and i probably won’t give up on it entirely (i have a couple half finished good omens oneshots tucked away in a notebook that i need to get around to finishing and typing up) but at the same time i really want to branch out and work on my skills as a writer and come up with my own original ideas and stuff like that but there just doesn’t seem to be as much of a place for original writing on tumblr and i haven’t been able to find writing communities/websites that aren’t mainly focused on or populated with fic writers. and i’ve never really been that popular on tumblr even when i was solely writing fic so i suppose i shouldn’t be surprised that an original story that’s shaping up to be very long and weirdly biblical isn’t all that appealing to the couple hundred ppl that followed me for scriddler writing haha. 

at the end of the day like i KNOW that my writing is for me and social media doesn’t matter or whatever but it is very demotivating to put my best efforts and attention and energy into something that i’m passionate about and interested in and then...... like no one reads it. if u look at my ao3 it has the least kudos and hits of anything i’ve ever posted (except one random unfinished thing that i didn’t even realize was still on there and i just deleted bc i’m never going to finish it lol). and thats a sad thing to see! it makes me sad when i look at the notes on a post and it has 2 likes and 6 reblogs that are all from me and my various other blogs.

like this is an idea that i’ve been messing around with and trying to write for years and i finally figured out an iteration of it that mostly works and that i’m proud of and want to keep writing but i have no one to share it with. and i can’t talk to anyone about it because no one’s read it and i am having a very hard time trying to persuade anyone to read it. and then it feels like... like why am i putting all this effort into something that’s just going to end up sitting on my computer forever?

i don’t want to stop updating this blog but like. posting things and getting no response makes me feel like shit but i can’t control what people think or do so i’ve either got to stop caring (which probably won’t happen any time soon) or stop posting.

idk this was a very long, very “woe is me” response to a series of very sweet messages but the point is i probably won’t be gone for good and if you do want to read my weird novel-ish thing that i’m working on i’ll continue to post it on ao3, but this blog will be less active because I’m mostly focusing on continuing iata before i move onto other projects. i’ll keep reblogging fanart and fanfic and such (with some of my own fic thrown in if i’m inspired) but like i’m gonna work on the projects i want to work on and if no one wants to read them then they’ll just have to wait until i want to write the kind of thing they want to read which may not be for a while. 

thanks for everyone who’s been supportive of this blog and my writing! i would literally die for u

[hobidreams]

Hi Rain!

I'm sending you this ask as a reply to your reply lol but also to say that: I have finished the last 2 eps.😆! And I won't spoil anything promise. I want to wait for you and pls take your time to watch it until you want/ready to talk about it! 💟

Here are my follow-up comments on your replies ahehe lol:

• Ooh definitely. Didn't even know divorce is legal in Japan! It's good to know they're taking marriage (as they should haha) seriously unlike the other LIB franchise 😅

• Ah yes, Eri!! Ah, that's right haha to avoid any more unneccesary dramas haha. I did sort of liked that they did that.

• With Mori's dream-- ah man poor guy but hope he meets someone who's a better match for him!

• Now I can't wait to watch the reunion now!

• LOOL I also don't like Wataru's goatee 😆😆 It looks weird right? Didn't think it fit him much. it distracted me a lot ahahahaha that I just wondered what he'd look like without one haha. Also i remembered when he had his hair cut for his legit proposal to Midori, the afterlook looked.. almost the same? The direction his hair was just different but i didn't think there was something new 😅 but anyway ahaha

• I just wondered, did you like/ever liked Yudai? Haha just curious 😆

• The one with Ayano-- I just read the link (thanks!). So that's why...i thought I was the only one thinking about it, i didn't want to be rude haha. I did noticed when Shuntaro & her were arguing in one of the eps, her voice got deeper and serious?? Which was weird. Knowing you and other people thought this too, makes sense. I also really think she's facing maybe a turmoil deep inside her but overall, I hope she figures things out in her life. Totally agree with you!

• Asfshdjrir jeezus, istg--I can't with Midori sometimes 😆 cannot wait to talk all of these with you!!

• OH I love that they're all genuinely friends! I was also stalking their IGs last night but all of them haven't updated with the latest eps yet haha.

• I can't wait for the reunion!! I hope they'd green light it!

Are you also watching the LIB US season 2? They just released it a few days ago, right?

Very true haha 😂-- we all just hope these people get to be happy in the end! And definitely-- a wedding dress fitting moment is a MUST hahaha. I mean we all love outfit montages 🥰

OMG GUUURL-- yes yes, just keep watching and enjoy it all hahahah 😆 I CAN'T WAIT TO KNOW YOUR REACTIONS AND HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS!! 👀👀

I also hope you get to rest well after the procedure you had! Don't move too much and pace yourself. Wishing you a speedy recovery! Take your time and also enjoy watching!!

Sending you big warm hugs!! 💟💟

- 🧇

IM FINISHED WATCHING NOW!!! please send me your thoughts <3 im so excited to hear what you think!!!!

omg for Wataru’s hair, i 100% agree with you LMAO. i was sitting there like ?? what the heck did he change. ALSO I HAVE TO SHARE THIS WITH YOU!! 🤣 the goatee grew on me a lil bit by the end of the show but ONLY a little bit hahah

im not watching LIB US S2. ive seen some ppl talkin about it on the JP subreddit and it sounds like a hot mess hahaha. i ony watched s1 because of all the Jessica memes anyway 🤣

thank u for ur patience 🥺🌹 it was a rough few days at first but im feeling much better now and am still taking things easy, but feeling good. take care <3 cant wait for your next msg!!! 

[jooheongif]

it's theory anon,hi!!how are YOU?i'm really good rn thanks:)) thank you for your kindness again,i'm really happy i could somehow help to help you feel even a tiny bit better and hope you're doing well now,too(and it's ok to not rest on your day off but it's also ok to do so if that's what you feel is right for you atm!).about the mf(ilm), i thought the same thing, it felt like a parallel universe type of story!i also really love plotlines about friendship, (again cont.i'll try to be briefer!)

(i’m so sorry i wrote a rly long reply so i’m gonna put this under read more !!)

2. friendship is beautiful and i feel oftentimes underappreciated(but not mx!there they go again being amazing) so i love the concept. personally i like not knowing what exactly the producers were thinking because having my own interpretation of something and seeing other ppl have their own fills me with wonder,like,that's art!so many people think so many different things and no one's wrong i love it!!your thoughts about them appreciating everything they've done so far,you're absolutely right(cont) 3. i hope they are able to bc everything's so hectic for the.i get lost just looking at their official schedule,i don't know how they do it but i also hope they are aware of all these things bc those are all mindblowingly huge accomplishments in my opinion and i just want them to feel like their hard work is worth it,yknow?(is this comprehensible?)and i know they feel pressure because as you said the business is nasty but yea i hope at the end of the day they can feel like (cont.???again 4. everything they've put so much of themselves into is worth it,i love their energy and fierce determination and i just don't want them to lose it but maybe as you said feel less pressured..but then the only way would realistically be to make sure they get awarded in the Real World so we're all doing our best in the system&hating it as you said:/ they just mean so much to so many people i want them to feel that too!i try to contain myself but here i go again! sorry it's so long AND i have more(con 5. also!thank you for your big reply and sharing your thoughts i mostly just agreed with (but you're right so what else can i do),i don't have mbb friends to vent to and fanperson(is there a gender neutral term for fanboy/fangirl?) over mx with and this is really nice and fulfilling(again,if i'm boring you,you can just delete the messages and not reply!) so THANKS!it's great to strive to be a better person but i feel like one(you) should also acknowledge the good things they're already doing(cont?) 6. you showed such pure kindness and really melted someone's(my) heart and that's a Big Deal!djkghddgwe can agree that we both inspired each other :') also please i feel like you're such a wonderful soul and you really deserve every bit of gratitude and appreciation i managed to express(i feel a lot moreprobably) so!yeah!reminder that you're lovely and deserve to be appreciated and i'm also very,very happy you're here!you made my day brighter for the 2nd time now wow!thanks! i hope you and(cont.:() 7. your gorgeous heart are taking good care and enjoying your day/night! and this cb!i really like it i haven't had time to listen to the entire album but jealousy!is a bop honestly it's my type of jam and the choreo is stunning and so are their voices!iwas so skeptical about the lyrics(they could've been like hero or stuck and those made me a bit >:/ honestly) but i really should've known they wouldn't fail me in any way ever!i can't wait to hear the rest of the songs i hope you enjoy them too!bye

hi theory anon, it's nice to hear from u again ! firstly, i am so sorry for the slow reply to this ! but im rly glad to know that u are doing good :-) i'm doing ok too thank u !! how are u ? kfjjfdsjfdf sorry that u had to read my tags but thank u for saying that !! i just feel so guilty when i do nothing bc im absolutely terrified of time passing too quickly ? just the thought of letting a few minutes go to waste is overwhelming ? even though i know it's not rational to think like this but ??? theres just this constant feeling that im running out of time so i try to get rid of it by always doing smth ?? and feel bad when i dont ? idk ?? but anyway im working on it and ill be ok ! sorry..not to be dramatic and tmi and all that kjdfdj istg this blog gives me too much freedom to say...too much :( (hope the internet folks that collect metadata never read the garbage i write bc..yikes they aren't gonna hav the best time) anyway..yea. what a paragraph to start off this reply :( sorry for the honesty and saying so much all the time btw :( not that being honest is necessarily a bad thing but ! idk every time i write smth i suddenly feel extra self conscious and feel like deleting it bc im rly embarrassed and always end up having big regret later when i reread anything ive typed up !! but i just keep writing them anyway bc...idk ?? i'd rly hate it if someone got discouraged from sharing their thoughts/worries/feelings which i think is a rly important human thing :( so  yea im rly embarrassed w anything i write but i'll keep doing it anyway bc i'm all for that kind of stuff and sometimes i know its not easy and it takes someone a lot to share that and its a good thing and i dont ever want anyone to feel discouraged from doing that ! anyway i just felt like i rly needed to say all of this..but pls dont feel obliged to reply to this mess !! anyway back to mx ! you are right :( i also hope mx feel like what they've done is worth smth w/e their definition or standard of that is :( like.. all of the hard work they've put into being mx it certainly means so much to fans but i hope all the hard work they've put into being mx also means smth to them at the end of the day and they are happy w what they're doing and what they've achieved so far :( and yes we'd love mx to always be rewarded in the real world :( though we love them and we want to get them a win, i know that everyone has their commitments, means and different circumstances and we can only do so much :( but even if u think its just a small contribution, everything adds up and counts and i know that all mbb hav contributed in some way in helping them get another win for this cb ! there are some mbb who can't buy albums or streaming passes and things and i hope they don't feel bad for this :( even if all you can do is watch the mv once or twice, even if you could only vote, i hope you know that it all counts and matters !! abt mx's schedule, i get tired just by looking at their weekly one idk how they can even put up w it all ?? after this they'll hav their japanese album and things and then they'll have their concerts and on top of all that apparently [some of them are also studying] ????? they are so hardworking :( HOW do they do it !! just..thinking abt their schedule is overwhelming !!! also pls dont think that you're boring me or anything like that :( im so thankful for any msg i receive and the fact that u actually took the time to type out smth to send to me ?? im so grateful ?? u are never boring !! honestly even if u sent me a stainless steel dishwasher manual w the page length of like..23 bibles, i'd still love u for it and i'd prob read all of it :( btw thank u sm for saying all those kind things !!! receiving kindness for the 3rd time is rly !!!!!!! and once again i've done nothing to deserve it :( i dont even know what i can say to you that will ever be enough to thank u again or to top what u hav already said ! if there was like a...maslows hierarchy of kindness of smth, ur at the very top of that triangle and anything i say will never be as kind as what you have said !! for you, i can agree that we both inspired each other :-) but really thank u so much from the bottom of my heart :( i hope you know how kind and lovely u are too ! if nobody told u this today, i wanted to say that im rly grateful to know u and i'm happy that you're here !! thank u again for being so kind and thoughtful and for making me smile !! :( same, i havent properly listened to the whole album either bc ive just been letting it stream in the background (but i dont count that as a proper listen unless i listen w headphones tbh) ill give it a good listen one day ! also im a repeat 1 kind of garbage person until i feel the need to listen to a new song ?? and rn jealousy to me is a song that gets better w every listen ??? shes too powerful atm :( one day ill listen to another song but today is not that day ! Actually.....I think jealousy is my fav mx song ???? before this cb i didnt hav a fav bc i couldnt pick the song i liked most out of blue moon/blind/fighter/incomparable. i was just gonna base it off the one w the most play count out of those 4 but now i know its jealousy ! what are ur fav mx songs ?? btw i know im always saying that anything mx releases is always a masterpiece no matter what, but in all seriousness its ok if u didn't like smth they released. i don't think it makes u any less of a mbb if u didn't enjoy a certain release or if u only liked one aspect of a thing but not so much the rest of the thing. anyway not to sound so...stale and commonplace but for lack of a better word/sentence, at the end of the day your own reactions and feelings to a piece of art like music...it's all just subjective isnt it ?? not liking that thing doesnt mean that its not a masterpiece or its any less of a masterpiece to someone else either so !! it's ok !! anyway this is rly....ive written a lot and its all over the place and incoherent probably :( i'm sorry !! feel free to reply whenever u feel like it, or no pressure on never replying at all btw ! also feel free to disagree w anything i say ! thank u sm for talking to me abt mx bc ive also got no mbb friends so !!! thank you :( theres so many times where i rly want to start a conversation w someone but im too scared and also i've got no clue abt how to initiate conversation ! and the times when i do manage to...i get stuck on how to keep the conversation going ? but when i figure smth out then im coming for u @ friendship !! i hope u had a good weekend and that you got some rest and that ur doing ok wherever u are !! until next time, take care ❤️❤️❤️

[oppatxtme]

Christian Yu: What’s On Sight (1)

CHRISTIAN YU x READER x JAY PARK

Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 // Chapter 3 // Chapter 4 // Chapter 5 // Chapter 6 // Chapter 7  // Chapter 8 // Chapter 9

WARNING: Just some curse words in some part. (sorry)

A/N: (Nhaks lakas maka-A/N HAHA!) Hello there ppl ~ This will be my first time posting my written scenario. I have lots on draft but it just stays there. Hahaha! But this is just my testing on posting it. I hope you liked it. Tell me what you think. I appreciate it really. 

Also, just keep in mind that English is not my native language so there might be some spelling and grammar error. Sorry for my lack of talent and I promise to work hard on this. Thank you and please enjoy. Any feedback is well loved. <3

             Ba?

                 BaaaaaaaaaRom!

                 Yaaaah! Christian!

  - yow! hahaha!

theres no need to yell

whats up? miss me?

                 Tsssk! Wat took u so long to reply?

               Wen u just tweet some trash when i msg u?

  - first of all its not trash, its called selfie. a selfie of a very handsome man who's supposed to be ur only best friend on earth. so show some love.

                FYI ur not the ONLY best friend i have. aaargh! watever!

  - ok fine. im just the best of the best u have. hahaha

                 k.

  - HAHAHAHA!

                 O_O

- so wats new? its rare that ur the one looking for me and flooding me msgs like that..

                 well..

  - well?

                its just that..

 - just that - you really miss me right?

                seriously Ian? If I were to miss someone, u already know who it was and its not you.

 - HAHAHA! I know. I know. Its Lori. Its always been Lori.

                 yea, always..

  - well Lori misses u too. we both do.

                 Loooori! Arrrgh! dont be like that Ian, if u keep saying and sending me that I might change my mind on renewing my contract here.

  - huh? ur planning on renewing there? but thats not what u said when u took ur vacation YN

                  yea, i know. but something came up and i cant afford to quit and stay in Seoul as planned

  - WHY??

                 change of plans? hehe

 - well obviously

                  wait. r u mad or something?

 - no. its just that its not like you. i mean ur not that type of person who just back out once u decide on something w/o even trying.

                 i know Ba.. u dont have any idea how stressful it is, but i cant affort to make a mistake now..

               i just cant Ba

 - where r u now? its already 6am here in Seoul so its already 1am there in Dubai right?

                 yea.. why?

 - answer my call.

  You’re hesitant to answer his call. But you answered anyway because you know him too well. He won’t stop calling until u answered.

 You cleared your throat.

 "Oh?"

  "Took you long enough."

 You can’t help but smile on how comfortable the two of you become. I guess that’s what four years of friendship can do to you.

  "Well, I miss you too Ba."

  "Whatever. So mind telling me what’s on your empty head that you decide to renew your freaking contract on that trashy company you're in."

  "Haha! The company is not trashy, just most of the people in it though."

  "Same thing. So why? Don’t you think you've been trolling me long enough? Long distance call is not cheap you know."

  You end up laughing at imagining how irritated he looks at the moment.

  "Stingy as always. But first, why are you mad?"

  "Wait a moment here YN, I'm the one who's calling so just answer my question and I might tell you why I'm mad."

  "Fine. Well, how do I start.."

 Honestly, you have plenty on your mind that you want to say to him. Because u know that out of all the people you know, you know that Christian is the right person who you can talk about it.

 But now that you've been keeping it for too long for yourself, you’re having a problem with putting it to words.

  "How about starting on since when are you having this issues and keeping it to yourself so now you're stressing yourself about it?"

 Again, you can’t help but laugh.

  "What’s funny YN? Are you gone crazy?"

  "Well, I think I am. Because just hearing you blabber makes my mind at ease. I don’t know how and why."

  You know that you said something cheesy so you're waiting for his lame joke in return, but it’s just silence.

  "Ba? Are you there?"

  You heard him clear his throat.

  "Damn YN, just answer my question will you?"

  "Fine. It happens right after my one week stay there in Seoul. When I went back home, I talked to Mom about the plan I talked you about. She agreed and more excited about it. But when she opened what I told her to Dad, he closes the idea and ends up making my return to Dubai much early as planned. And he wants me to either renew my contract here or find another company. He also said that before making any stupid decision, I have to make sure that my future is secure. And he brought again the topic of him finding a man for me to marry. What the heck right. I mean he's saying that before but I thought is all lame jokes but now he is serious with that arrange marriage thing? Aaargh!"

 You paused to breathe and try to stop the tears that I've been holding.

  "Did your Dad know that you went here in Seoul and met me before making that plan?"

  "I think so. I show the pictures to Mom that I took there and also with the crew. Why?"

  "I think it’s my entire fault YN. Sorry."

  "Huh? Sorry for what? How can it be your fault?"

  "Well, if what I think is correct then it’s really my fault. But I'm not sure."

  I heard his sight, a deep and long one. And I can’t stop wondering why.

  "How? Christian?"

  "You need to get some sleep YN. It’s already late there."

  "Oh no! Don’t give me that bull Christian. You need to tell me how it is your fault? And what’s the sorry for?"

  Silence.

  "I'm waitin Christian Yu. Or should I call you so you can just answer my question?"

  "God, YN. You and your impatience is really something."

  "Are you going to tell me or you're just going to tell me?"

  And it’s his turn to laugh at you.

  "Aigooo. Thanks for that very considerate choice YN."

  "I'm listening Ian."

  "So Bossy! Just like your father."

  "BAROM YU!"

  "Yes! First, I'm not sure if it’s really my fault. But given the fact that your Dad knew we met since your two years abroad, then I think it has something to do with the talk we had two years ago."

  "Two years ago? You and Dad talk? About what?"

  "Before your departure to Dubai. Remember the crew and I stayed 3 days in your home town to bond and decided to extend one more day just so we can send you off on the day of your flight?"

  You nod your head as if he can see you.

  "We stayed at your house that last day remember?"

  Again you nod. As if he can see you, stupid.

  "And that night, your boyfriend told you that he can’t come along to the airport with us. You told him it’s okay, but you cried like a water falls that night."

  "EX-BOYFRIEND now, yeah I remember. And now that I think about it, you stayed in my room just to console me and to make sure that I won’t stay up late. And that’s the last time I saw you because the next morning you're gone. They say that you had to go back to Seoul immediately due to some work issue. I keep calling you but I can’t get a hold of you."

  "Because right after I left your room, I saw your Dad drinking on the terrace and I don’t know what kind of spirit came to me that made me go and talk to him."

 He paused and I'm sure I can hear his hand touching either his hair or his cheeks.

  "What did the two you talked about Christian?"

  “Well, what do you think we can talk about on that time?”

  "Huh?"

  "Back then, I kind of told your Dad what I really feel. Well now, I don’t know if this will make any sense to you or if you will take this seriously but I told him three years ago. At first, I asked him if he believed in love at first sight. He said no.

But I told him that I do believe in such. Because there this girl that I met, and what I felt was extraordinary, it’s somewhat like "SPARK AT FIRST SIGHT".

And I tried to ignore what I felt towards that girl because I know if I entertain that feeling it will just go nowhere. But the second time I saw how pure and kind she is, I admit that it’s a "crush at second sight" for her.

And the third time I saw her, we got a chance to somehow get to know little but enough from each other, and that’s the day I surrender that it’s "LOVE AT THIRD SIGHT"."

  I think I know where this is going, but I still need to be sure so I keep all that I want to say for myself, for now.

  "After that, he told me that he admires my ways and ask if that girl is already my girl. But I said no because after that day I saw her with someone else and what I felt is one-sided and for that my heart got "BROKEN AT FOURTH SIGHT".

But I told him that I'll make sure that she will be my wife someday. It’s just that it’s not yet our time back then."

  "Barom-"

  "No YN, let me finish please."

  You didn’t say or more likely you can’t say anything. You think your mind is on a chaos mode.

  "Your dad figure who the girl I was talking about, he said that we're two different people and still young and for me who hasn't figured out my life while you're already on the path towards what he planned for you. But he got mad when I said that you need to live the life you want not what he planned. And I'm certain that you and I are for each other and there will be a day that I will tell you how I felt and you and I can make our own life to live happily.

 I know that it’s stupid of me that I'm saying this now and thru the phone but. I just don't know what to do YN. I'm confused and scared."

  You kept quiet for a while. Then you found yourself looking on the screen of your phone. Dumbfounded on what Christian Yu is saying. Your best friend that you treated like your big brother, rather than your own.

 You’re confused. The things running thru your mind is kept on filling up. And you just can handle it all at once. So you just press the end button on the screen without saying anything to him.

 You tried to breathe just to calm yourself.

 But not a minute pass and your phone rings.

 And it’s Christian.

 'Aaah! So it’s not a dream.'

 While looking at the caller ID on your phone, all that he said is slowly sinking in.

 'So he likes me back then? Does he still feel the same way till now? Nah, that’s impossible. But now that I think of it, it just makes things more clear. All the favors I asked of him, he never once he refuses and all I thought it’s because he thinks of me as a little sister that he never had.

 Aaargh! My head is aching because of this overthinking.'

  Your attention return to your phone that keeps on ringing, you decided to reject his calls and send him a message.

 'Sorry Christian, talk to you later once I figure things out.'

 It’s already late and in just 3hrs you need to go for your work. You stress yourself if you will sleep of just waiting for the time. But then you fell asleep and woke up to the sound of your alarm.

 'Another day but same old problems, please no more new ones. Let me settle my entire problem first and give me a rest! Please!'

TO BE CONTINUE...

Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 // Chapter 3 // Chapter 4 // Chapter 5 // Chapter 6 // Chapter 7  // Chapter 8 // Chapter 9  

A/N: what do you think about this chapter? Talk to me, don’t be shy. I won’t bite. Have a good day/night everyone!

Y/N Portrayer in collage is @Mari_jasmmn  ~ check her out in IG (GIRL CRUSH)

[keerawrrr]

I've literally been frustrated since SUNDAY night.... I did something nice, out of the kindness of my heart...which regardless, a1...should know it n move on, I know buuuuuuut my ass is a LITTLE bit torn because I like validation, is it validation? needing the Pat on the back, good job thing told to me? anyway, yea....a guy wanted to throw a baby shower for his girl, he was struggling, so I offered my time to help. o checked in to make sure things were good, even hit her up to get info he didn't know, volunteered Juicys pockets lol n even picked up some things for a gift.... I was mad wit dude because the day before, he tells me he aint got money for Jack squat, not even no food for the party.... hmmm OK, n I'm like so when was he planning to tell me?? like I was finna pay for the whole shindig? I aint a party planner.... so I said fck it, told Juicy, we'll still get them something maybe take them to eat....I hit him up, he says they busy with something..... give it a couple hrs....still not available, he tells me the next day would be cool. I'm already irked cuz I dnt even stay in they area, like my gas aint wit this so I say fck it ima jst take the shit to work n let him have it. I felt bad that the party didn't happen in general so I went around the store n got some ppl who put up with him lol to sign the card I got for her.... he got off work, I had told him to come see me so I could give him the stuff, he takes off....I'm now annoyed, I call him n hang up on him after I cussed him out he comes back a few hrs later, I sign the card, give him the bag, he says thanks, n dips now I'm waiting for the text or maybe a msg on Facebook that she got the stuff, liked it, a thank you or even if he relayed the msg for her.....but nothing....Nada... it's Tuesday....n I've been seeing them both post on Facebook....posting, talking to ppl so...I'm confused as to why I still haven't received a simple thank you that takes 2 seconds to type....? she posted a pic of their legs intertwined.... n I see the cup I got her in the background on the windowsill...... wtf.... n I work tmrw....n knowing me, if he speaks to me....I'm either cussin him out or cutting him off entirely cuz that's fckd up I even stopped myself for a second n said well maybe he's waiting to tell me face to face...but still....3 fckn days? unless u presenting me wit a balloon or some shit, aint no need to wait 3 fckn days to say thank you.....like I dnt get it? I even tried looking up scriptures to calm my nerves but there was nothing I could find. everything was about being a cheerful giver n how doing for others can help you....like no that's not what I need lol I'm finna strangle somebody, I'm close to the edge lol I'm tryna stay positive...I'm trying to but I dnt get it....nothing I bought could get its nose turned up on: lipgloss, a cute cup, newborn bottles (3) n baby bath wash n lotion & a cute card.....like what is the problem? are they jst ignorant n ungrateful? I know they got mad ass issues but I dnt wanna label them that....but if it's true ima be mad as fck n never talk to that foul muhfcka again -woosah-....ugh I need to chill, my nerves jst so bad....n I aint have nobody to talk to about it cuz im mad at Juicy too....so I jst been sleeping n pounding at my pillows