#thank you for giving me a chance to talk about doug eiffel i feel like i haven't said enough things about doug eiffel lately

[commsroom]

first of all thank you so much for having this blog and sharing your thoughts!! your eiffelposting (and heraposting) has literally got me through the post w359 Grieving Process after running though the whole thing in about 2 weeks and your character insight is. well. chefs kiss. Eiffel Understander Of All Time. 2 things: 1, if it’s ok, you’ve mentioned before about an eiffel version of change of mind, and the idea has (1/2)

(2/2) literally stuck with me since and i’d love to hear your thoughts on that if you have any! 2, are there active w359 discords about bc i got a deep need to yap about all this (apologies if the first msg came through twice, tumblr's being weird)

oh, it makes me very happy to hear that!! your art is a gift, and i'm glad i can offer you something in return.

as for your question... yes! okay. the basic premise is to frame eiffel losing (and regaining) his memory as a catalyst for character growth, as a narrative parallel to lovelace's death and resurrection, rather than a resolution. i think it's noteworthy that the finale has eiffel faced with himself from first a very internal (the final confrontation literally taking place inside his head) and then a very external (hearing his logs as an outsider after losing his memory) perspective and i think the natural extension of this is, well. to confront him with himself.

one of the most key things about eiffel's character arc is that he wants to escape himself. "it's taken me this long to realize that running from everyone else means that you're alone with yourself" but, as addressed in constructive criticism, he's also running from himself. he doesn't like what he hears on those tapes, but the eiffel of succulent rat-killing tar both is and isn't the eiffel of brave new world, and i think that's what's being set up/suggested at the end.

i think viewing eiffel's memory loss as a death is incomplete, while viewing it as a "fresh start" or anything of the sort is incompatible with his existing character arc. but if you think of it as part of this pattern of eiffel trying to escape himself, and ending up still stuck with himself...? if he makes the big sacrifice, "escapes" the person he is as much as anyone can, and then finds he's still stuck with himself, still has to live as the person he is...? then, what next?

(i think this also ties in well with maintaining sobriety; addiction, self-destructive impulses and the desire to not be present in his life, etc. are all rooted in the same things.)

my concept of eiffel regaining his memory would be this sort of... fever dream "life flashing before his eyes" sequence of stepping into significant moments in his life (as a stranger) and interacting with himself, and needing to accept / reintegrating all of these versions of who doug eiffel is and has been. that the question of "am i still doug eiffel?" is one of accountability for his past but that he's always been changing and will continue to grow. i think a key part of this would be him seeing these moments through a pop culture lens / as if it's a movie and then more gradually seeing what they really are. ideally, these would be moments tied to specific songs for him; eiffel's internal soundtrack is well beyond wolf 359's budget, i'm sure, but it's a hypothetical anyway. these would be real memories, in some form, but obviously none of this would be happening for real; it's just how i think his brain would make sense of it (while he's presumably unconscious.) it's like sarah shachat said about eiffel's story in limbo: to tell that story, he would first have to make it a story.

i like this because i think it works well with eiffel's existing arc. i like it because it provides a different angle on self-exploration via memory in the same vein as memoria and change of mind. i like it because it makes a good potential parallel to shut up and listen/constructive criticism, and to mayday (eiffel alone with the voices of others vs. eiffel literally alone with himself.) it feels like a natural extension + heightened conclusion to things that i feel are already implied + set up. and, while i like where wolf 359 ended and would never want to add to it, i like imagining what zach valenti would do with a bunch of different versions of eiffel at different stages of his life interacting; i think he would knock it out of the park with material like that.

i think the real core of identity in wolf 359 is in these moments where people assert who they are, or decide to be who they are. again, in parallel to lovelace... the same way that lovelace decides to be isabel lovelace, "even if [she] never has been before", eiffel would decide to be doug eiffel, all the people he's been, the person he is now, and all the people he's going to be.

(as for discord... i think there are some, but unfortunately i don't know of any that i would personally recommend. you are always welcome to ramble at Me on discord, but i know that's probably not the same.)

[nobodysdaydreams]

Any one or more of these that you'd like to answer for any of the characters I'd love to see! Hope you're doing well with finals <3

Doug Eiffel, Daniel Jacobi, Nicholas Benedict, & Dr. Garrison

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to ths character? Something you don't like?

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

Thank you, Sophie! So many fun questions! Let's see... where to begin.

Doug Eiffel

6. What's something you have in common with this character? We both have very bad ADHD. I don't know if there's a character I've related to as strongly as Doug Eiffel for that specific purpose. I'll have to pull together a list of all the ADHD characters I related to someday.

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character? He gets to see his daughter Anne again. After all this time he deserve a chance to make things right. His daughter needs her dad to come home and give her a hug.

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire? I love Doug's friendship with Hera and Minkowski. They all care for each other so much despite their differences and they survive because they rely on and care for each other.

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like? I love writing about Doug's new life experiences on Earth without his old memories. Reinventing himself, finding himself again. However, I don't like the fact that I haven't had time to write a ton of Wolf359 in a while. Why must my ideas be so ambitious? 😭

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now? First impressions, ngl, I judged Doug a bit for his need to make jokes and be at the center of attention and apparent lack of regard for the feelings and concerns of others, until I realized the reason I didn't like him were because he reminded me of my own flaws. But we learn and we grow, and Doug certainly did. Very proud of him.

Daniel Jacobi (aka Duck Boy 🦆)

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like? This is gonna sound bad, but affectionately bully him a little bit. Even though I really came around to this character, he really needed to get it together. Glad he finally did!

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character? I have several head canons that I really need to start writing more about, one of them being that Jacobi and Maxwell have similar broken relationships with their families (for some similar and dissimilar reasons) and that's part of what drove them to become friends. Also that duck imprinting on Jacobi fic (it will take a while to get there but I have ideas)

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire? Jacobi and Maxwell's friendship. I know people talk a lot about Jacobi and Kepler, but he was a horrible boss and their relationship had a huge toxic power imbalance (though I begrudgingly came around on Kepler too, oh if only Whiskey Boy could have gotten there sooner). But you can tell Jacobi actually cares about Maxwell. She's possibly the only character he not only cares about but believes in. Jacobi knows Kepler is full of it (though his thoughts about Kepler being full of it certainly increase after Maxwell's death, he knows to some extent Kepler's kind of a jerk), but you can tell he believes in Maxwell. He justifies all the horrible things he does because he says they allow people like her to do her job. He sees her potential to do good and wonderful things and realizes just how much is lost when she dies (and later on, how much was really lost by having her work at Goddard when her work could have gone to so many better things). He sees his own goodness as only being an extension of protecting and helping her. When she dies, Jacobi just becomes the guy who explodes things and kills people. You see the toll that takes on him. It's also nice to see Maxwell caring for Jacobi before she died. You can tell she sees the potential he has for goodness despite the fact that Jacobi can't see it in himself.

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now? Y'all already know I had some negative words to say about this man (he deserved it), but I went from bullying Duck Boy to affectionately bullying him, and I loved his arc! We love to see redemption.

Nicholas Benedict

6. What's something you have in common with this character? Being neurodivergent, relying on friends and family, and especially the show version and the way he reacts to situations. Oh my brother is the evil guy who wants to kidnap me? Let me hop into a row boat I'll give him something to kidnap! He's very distractable and the inattentive ADHD is easy to see but those big emotions and impulsivity slip out every now and again and that's something I very much relate to.

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like? I love that we all recognize and agree that he is an amazing mentor figure and cares so much about his family. I know that sounds cliched but its so wholesome.

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character? SO MANY and in the interest of not spoiling my own fic, I'm just gonna say that he's been through so much, but has chosen, in spite of it all, to chose to be good and be better, and I greatly admire that.

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire? His relationship with his daughters (Number Two, Rhonda, and Constance). You can tell he loves these girls and they are his family, blood related or not. It's delightfully wholesome.

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to this character? Something you don't like? I'll do the fic reading question for Nicholas, because I love when fics understand Nicholas. He might not be super athletic and might rely on his friends a lot, but that does not mean he's incapable or blind to who his brother is. Nicholas knows Nathaniel, he knows how controlling, manipulative, and slimy he is, heck, that's the whole reason he left when he was a kid. Nicholas knows Nathaniel has all sorts of traps for him, he's not stupid. He just loves his brother and believes in him and is willing to take risks to get him back (and it paid off 🥹🥰). Something I don't like is when Nicholas is portrayed as dumb or incompetent for believing in Nathaniel or forgiving him (not that Nathaniel wouldn't have consequences- that's part of the redemption process- but I don't like it when people try to say that Nicholas was wrong to want to get his brother back or somehow betrayed his friends by doing so even though Nicholas was firm in condemning Nathaniel for his treatment of the children and others).

Dr. Garrison

6. What's something you have in common with this character? Women in STEM. Mental health issues. Science. Psychology. Neuroscience. That about sums it up. I really wish we could have learned more about her backstory, what she wants, and what led her to work for Curtain.

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like? Explore her backstory and complex relationship with Curtain and other characters. If the show wouldn't do it, then we can! I mean, they teased it a bit in season 2, but like...give us more!

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character? You already know. Here, let me just...there we go. But to summarize, she's an orphan, cares about others but has trauma and her own goals that frequently get in the way of that, she once had a better relationship with Curtain and several other characters, and she struggled with alcoholism and depression at several points in her life.

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like? Give her angst and complexity. She's a villain, don't get me wrong, but there's so much to her, and I just want to give her a hug. I have no idea if this was where they were going with her in the show, but I love writing it. I'm glad I was able to do that in SOS because I don't like the idea of writing her off as a side character when I think she has a lot more to offer.

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now? At first, being a books fan, I wondered why the show had so much of her, and at first thought it was to better characterize Curtain and his complex and weird relationship with his employees and pathological need to be liked and have the appearance of friends. But then, season 2, when they revealed she built the inventions and was working with Curtain for the money...and is apparently aware of the existence of psychics (as was Curtain at one point)...like girl, WHAT HAPPENED? I didn't go this direction in SOS, but I would not be surprised if had the show continued, the research Curtain, SQ's birth parents, Garrison, and Milligan were doing together had something to do with psychics, which would have tied nicely into the whole "where are Constance's birth parents?" plotline. Will I incorporate any of that into my fic? Haha...no spoilers. 😉

Thanks for the ask Sophie! 🥰

[asterdeer]

wolf 359 liveblog

hey uh so wolf 359 is a special thing for me and i want to record my reactions to it for my own personal posterity or w/e so spoilers only below the cut. merry christmas and merry surviving-wolf 359-finale night!

(pre-episode listening to the one-last-thing ep) michelle agresti made goddard futuristics badges she’s SO GOOD and i’m crying a lot. and everyone was there. a wolf 359 reunion. i’m crying. “the wolf of wolf street”

okay episode time

this music signals nothing emotionally stable

is cutter the old man. did pryce give him a new body. OH GOD CUTTER IS THE OLD MAN AND PRYCE GAVE HIM A NEW BODY RED ALERT

they’re telling their stories and telling each other’s parts of the stories this is the creepiest shitting thing

fuck off cutter no one has lived happily ever after i hate you SO much. i hope pryce stabs you through your throat before she conveniently dies too

“let’s get started” fuck me.

---

i have some genuine concerns right now about evil and plans

TELL THEM MINKOWSKI!! GET THEM!! CUT THEM DOWN WITH ONLY YOUR RIGHTEOUS ANGER!! I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!

eiffel talking about the alien!!! ayyyyyyyyyyy boi!!

god emma sherr-ziarko is just.... so good. she’s SO good. minkowski is strong and commanding but there’s this very slight tinge of fear and desperation and i love her SO much i love her and her va so much she’s SO good

eiffel’s and hera’s conversation :’)

.......uh yall hey quick question did we time travel or time loop or is this just a flashback. i’m too trained for panic to trust this and i’m weirded out akshkdjh

....but hera’s and eiffel’s first meeting......im crying......bye.........im out....... “it’s good to know you’re around” :’) :’) :’) let’s see how far we’ve come

is this scene gonna be kepcobi #confirmed i’d scream. OH SHIT THO JACOBI LAYING DOWN THE TRUTH. BLESS IT. 

EIFFEL AND LOVELACE ARE BEING FRIENDS!!! IT’S BEEN SO LONG!! I LOVE THEM!!!! EIFFELLACE FRIENDSHIP LIVES!! oh god they brought up his alcoholism and i’m crying again. also like. eiffel appreciates lovelace being there and it’s SO pure but i’m also really really really glad someone expressed some appreciation that eiffel is there too. like. he needs that. the boy needs that. 

MINKOWSKI. MINKOWSKI. BABE. YOU’VE SAID THREE WORDS BUT I LOVE YOU AND SUPPORT YOU FOR WHATEVER YOU DECIDE. 

EVERYONE’S REACTION WHEN SHE SAID SHE WAS GOING TO STAY. GOD BLESS. GOOD MOMENT. GOOD TEAM MOMENT. 

“destroy an entire species” oh GOD pryce&cutter you’re trying to kill the aliens??? what the?? what the shit??? why??? god why

minkowski’s speech.... minkowski trying to get kepler and young on her side.......everyone grOAnIng when rachel quotes princess bride (shut up eiffel u don’t even get that groan privilege)...... good stuff........

jacobi......babe..............! your unrequited love is showing..... not to mention.....your humanity....

“thank you daniel... and goodbye” SHOT! THROUGH! THE HEART!! and unrequited kepcobi is to blame!!!

jacobi: yea so i’m a real mean dude jacobi: but also hey i just met you and this is crazy but i just swore undying loyalty to you so love me maybe

oh SHIT. OH SHIT. OH SHIT. EIFFEL’S LOG. NO. I’M. THAT WAS A FUCKING LOW BLOW. SHIT. OH SHIT. HE BELIEVES HE’S GOING TO DIE. GOD. GOD. JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL. 

okay look. look here. douglas eiffel is so damn strong. douglas eiffel is so damn strong. he can sit there believing in his heart that he is going to die today at the hands of depraved and relentless villains and still speak words of strength and encouragement and love for his daughter who he hasn’t seen in years, and then come out only to encourage his commanding officer as well. there’s a reason douglas eiffel fulfills the communications officer role in this show and it’s because of this. it’s because he’s tough enough for this: he’s tough enough to smile for the sake of other people. 

OH MAN!! OH MAN!!!! THE LES MIS QUOTE WITH MINKOWSKI AND EIFFEL! I’M DOWN! ! PERSON DOWN!!!!! BYE!!! 

.................................no. no. NOPE. he called her renee. she loves him so much. she just wants to know he’s happy. he. she. he. he. she. she. i’m. no.

SHIT lovelace backing minkowski up. that’s what i’m HERE for. 

RENEE MINKOWSKI LAUGHING!! SO MUCH OF RENEE MINKOWSKI’S LAUGHTER!!! I’M SLAIN AND I’M IN LOVE!! SHE’S PLAYING COMMANDING OFFICER! SHE’S BEAUTIFUL AND GOOD AND ADORABLE AND PERFECT!!! whenever minkowski calls it “her” station i cry because minkowski deserves like a whole planet to command not just a station but she is so good at running her station. i love her. she’s good. she’s good.

i’m fricking. i’m fricking proud of myself. i heard that music and loved it and then cutter said it was based on a shakespeare play and i thought “that’s the tempest music.” and it was fuckin tempest music. this isn’t about wolf 359 i just gotta yell that even before cutter quoted it i felt that tempest feel in my soul.

i swear to pan The Harpoon is one of my favorite wolf 359 characters

jacobi!!! a great soul!!! maybe not a good one but a great one!! blowing that kazoo in victor’s face!! classique DID JACOBI JUST GET SHOT. SHIT. PLEASE TELL ME THAT WAS LOVELACE SHOOTING VICTOR. WHAT’S GOING ON. WHAT. 

so like is eiffel/jacobi a rarepair. idk i feel like they might mesh well together under better less morally suspect circumstances. the whole “want to turn my shit around and do some good for a chance” thing. and also the idea of jacobi being a bad influence on anne and completely destroying her chance of being an Upright and Morally Child Who Doesn’t Like Setting Things On Fire (At All) 

*takes the deepest possible breath* AALLLEXXAAAAAANDDEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRR

ssshshiiiiiiiiitttttttt that’s what decima was for

BOB’S BACK and god what i would give if bob would just. just. fuckin flatten them. just break past their shitting scienceyfied weapons and flatten them.

OH MY GOD EIFFEL WHAT. WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT. IM SCREAMING. DOUG. DOUG NO. NO. NO YOU TERRIBLE CHILD. 

“with my life, darlin. with my life.” douglas f. eiffel..................!!!!

jacobi no!! stop hurting him!!

cutter just.........???? killled????? an alien????????????????????????

....................shit. shit. NO. don’t........take.....his memories........shit.... this is bad this is bad this is SO bad. this is SO SO BAD. pryce. pryce needs to die. she needs to die nice and quick ok she needs to go HERA!! HERO!! THANK GOD!

this is the scene where kepler comes and saves jacobi??? right???? right

the eiffera is so strong and i’m SO weak for it he believes in her so much damn......... and pryce can get bent hera IS the army

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIT WARREN!!!! DAMN! WARREN!! GOD i knew his monologuing would kill him. i knew it. he should have just walked out. kepler. damn kepler. DAMN kepler. SHIT. SHIT.

jacobi.... jacobi no.......... jacobi don’t....................... J A C O B I [LONG UNENDING SCREAM]

M I N K O W S K I !!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SHE TOOK MONTY PYTHON AWAY FROM HIM!!! HOW DARE SHE! HOW FUCKIN DARE SHE!!! NO!!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH!!! HARPOON TO THE RESCUE!! SHIT MAN!!! HOLY SHIT!! HARPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!! [AIR HORNS BLARE]

uhhhhhhhhh i don’t like the way he said “let’s finish this” oh no  oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no  HIS MEMORIES OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO  EIFFEL NO!!!

and he’s awake for it. shit. oh god. oh god. oh god. he’s saying his final words. shit. shit. shit. 

[SCREAMS FOR AN ETERNITY] HE NEVER GOT TO SAY HIS WORDS TO HERA

AND NOW EIFFEL AND MINKOWSKI ARE MEETING  HE COMPARED HER TO KIRK AND HIM TO UHURA I’M DYING

...

...

....

they’re all gonna die aren’t they.

fuck.

NO! THEY’RE GOING TO GO THROUGH THE STAR! THEY’RE GOING TO GO THROUGH THE STAR!!

minkowski is completely and totally alone right now and i’m crying abt it. i’m crying a lot abt it rn. everything is going to shit. hell. HELL. this is my christmas present from gabriel fuckin urbina and co. hell. hell is my present. thanks gabriel urbina and co. this is some sweet sweet hell you’ve giftwrapped all pretty and nice for me.

minkowski and lovelace are okay.........................?

HOLY!! JACOBI!!! JACOBI’S GOOD!! HOLY SHIT!! I’M BEAMING SO HARD RIGHT NOW!!!!! OH MY GOD! MERRY CHRISTMAS!! 

eiffel calling her renee in that gentle quiet cautious voice is going to be the death of me. it is. i’m going to literally implode.

they’re............they’re going home...................they’re going home and alan rodi’s music is going to kill me..... doug just wants to stay with his friends......even now when he doesn’t really know them......... 

okay. this is going to take some time to absorb. i feel incredibly..........something. i don’t feel quite the sense of loss like i did at the end of taz balance because that was a definite end of something, i knew it wasn’t coming back because it was over (for the most part). this..... it’s probably not going to come back but their story isn’t over. douglas eiffel’s story for sure isn’t over, it’s just starting over again because he was a hero. they’re all heroes. 

“that was... wolf 359.” 

[commsroom]

What do you think eiffel was thinking about when he asked hera to destroy his and Pryce's memories during the finale? I was always so struck by his decision to self sacrifice but also (also!!) about the implications it has for either him intentionally inciting permanent harm on another person or that he doesnt consider permanent memory loss permanent harm?

i think what the show is trying to communicate about eiffel's decision is described best in hera's reasoning: "i don't need to beat you. no matter how much i want to, no matter how much you deserve it, it wouldn't change anything. what i need is to make sure that you're not going to hurt anyone else again. ever." it is enacting harm, but it's also preventative. how do you negotiate with people who have intentionally and systematically removed themselves from humanity, who don't even recognize your humanity? what's justified in preventing future harm? i think there is a meaningful difference in an action taken to protect others vs. one taken in retribution, even if retribution is justified.

i think there is also an angle from which you can consider his self-sacrifice another form of self-destruction. so much of eiffel's character arc comes back to the ways he tries to get away from himself, how much he doesn't want to be doug eiffel. all of the ways he fractures his identity, tells stories in the third person. how he distances himself, and how that's distanced him from the people he cares about, when all of the men in all of those stories are still doug eiffel. if you consider eiffel's memory loss a finality, then it reads as a fulfillment of that desire, and i just... don't think that's what the show is going for.

and then you have his survivor's guilt. "the driver's always fine." in boléro, he feels personally responsible for the people who died because of his unwillingness to harm anyone on purpose. i don't think that makes his choices wrong, and i think he's wrong to blame himself, but it's a factor worth considering. if on some level he might see harm as more justifiable if he is also the recipient of it.

i also think there's another perspective from which you could consider his decision a selfish one: he knows the implications this has for hera in particular, and the weight he's putting on her. she agrees to it, she understands, but even so. i think that is something they're going to have to work through at some point. eiffel may be making the call, but whatever harm is enacted, hera is the one pulling the trigger.

ultimately i think the approach that eiffel is still eiffel, or at least that he has the intent and capacity to be, makes the most sense thematically and tonally. i think seeing it that way serves as an continuation and final affirmation of what the show already says about identity, rather than introducing some new philosophical question. i think you can even make a case for restoring eiffel's memories post-canon as a natural extension of the show's exploration of self and his character arc in particular. i won't get too into that now because it's another discussion and i don't want to make this response unreadably long, but that is to say...

what was eiffel thinking? i don't feel like i can answer that conclusively. i'd be surprised if he could. it's brave, and self-sacrificing, it definitely saved them, and it was also selfish and self-destructive. i may not think eiffel's memory loss is necessarily final, but he did, in that moment, and that came with the full intent that the same would be true of pryce. it's complicated, and messy, and personally? i think pryce deserved worse. but it's not really about deserving either.