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[kyunyu3]

[cuddlytogas]

So I accidentally almost got into an argument on Twitter, and now I'm thinking about bad historical costuming tropes. Specifically, Action Hero Leather Pants.

See, I was light-heartedly pointing out the inaccuracies of the costumes in Black Sails, and someone came out of the woodwork to defend the show. The misunderstanding was that they thought I was dismissing the show just for its costumes, which I wasn't - I was simply pointing out that it can't entirely care about material history (meaning specifically physical objects/culture) if it treats its clothes like that.

But this person was slightly offended on behalf of their show - especially, quote, "And from a fan of OFMD, no less!" Which got me thinking - it's true! I can abide a lot more historical costuming inaccuracy from Our Flag than I can Black Sails or Vikings. And I don't think it's just because one has my blorbos in it. But really, when it comes down to it...

What is the difference between this and this?

Here's the thing. Leather pants in period dramas isn't new. You've got your Vikings, Tudors, Outlander, Pirates of the Caribbean, Once Upon a Time, Will, The Musketeers, even Shakespeare in Love - they love to shove people in leather and call it a day. But where does this come from?

Obviously we have the modern connotations. Modern leather clothes developed in a few subcultures: cowboys drew on Native American clothing. (Allegedly. This is a little beyond my purview, I haven't seen any solid evidence, and it sounds like the kind of fact that people repeat a lot but is based on an assumption. I wouldn't know, though.) Leather was used in some WWI and II uniforms.

But the big boom came in the mid-C20th in motorcycle, punk/goth, and gay subcultures, all intertwined with each other and the above. Motorcyclists wear leather as practical protective gear, and it gets picked up by rock and punk artists as a symbol of counterculture, and transferred to movie designs. It gets wrapped up in gay and kink communities, with even more countercultural and taboo meanings. By the late C20th, leather has entered mainstream fashion, but it still carries those references to goths, punks, BDSM, and motorbike gangs, to James Dean, Marlon Brando, and Mick Jagger. This is whence we get our Spikes and Dave Listers in 1980s/90s media, bad boys and working-class punks.

And some of the above "historical" design choices clearly build on these meanings. William Shakespeare is dressed in a black leather doublet to evoke the swaggering bad boy artist heartthrob, probably down on his luck. So is Kit Marlowe.

But the associations get a little fuzzier after that. Hook, with his eyeliner and jewellery, sure. King Henry, yeah, I see it. It's hideously ahistorical, but sure. But what about Jamie and Will and Ragnar, in their browns and shabby, battle-ready chic? Well, here we get the other strain of Bad Period Drama Leather.

See, designers like to point to history, but it's just not true. Leather armour, especially in the western/European world, is very, very rare, and not just because it decays faster than metal. (Yes, even in ancient Greece/Rome, despite many articles claiming that as the start of the leather armour trend!) It simply wasn't used a lot, because it's frankly useless at defending the body compared to metal. Leather was used as a backing for some splint armour pieces, and for belts, sheathes, and buckles, but it simply wasn't worn like the costumes above. It's heavy, uncomfortable, and hard to repair - it's simply not practical for a garment when you have perfectly comfortable, insulating, and widely available linen, wool, and cotton!

As far as I can see, the real influence on leather in period dramas is fantasy. Fantasy media has proliferated the idea of leather armour as the lightweight choice for rangers, elves, and rogues, a natural, quiet, flexible material, less flashy or restrictive than metal. And it is cheaper for a costume department to make, and easier for an actor to wear on set. It's in Dungeons and Dragons and Lord of the Rings, King Arthur, Runescape, and World of Warcraft.

And I think this is how we get to characters like Ragnar and Vane. This idea of leather as practical gear and light armour, it's fantasy, but it has this lineage, behind which sits cowboy chaps and bomber/flight jackets. It's usually brown compared to the punk bad boy's black, less shiny, and more often piecemeal or decorated. In fact, there's a great distinction between the two Period Leather Modes within the same piece of media: Robin Hood (2006)! Compare the brooding, fascist-coded villain Guy of Gisborne with the shabby, bow-wielding, forest-dwelling Robin:

So, back to the original question: What's the difference between Charles Vane in Black Sails, and Edward Teach in Our Flag Means Death?

Simply put, it's intention. There is nothing intentional about Vane's leather in Black Sails. It's not the only leather in the show, and it only says what all shabby period leather says, relying on the same tropes as fantasy armour: he's a bad boy and a fighter in workaday leather, poor, flexible, and practical. None of these connotations are based in reality or history, and they've been done countless times before. It's boring design, neither historically accurate nor particularly creative, but much the same as all the other shabby chic fighters on our screens. He has a broad lineage in Lord of the Rings and Pirates of the Caribbean and such, but that's it.

In Our Flag, however, the lineage is much, much more intentional. Ed is a direct homage to Mad Max, the costuming in which is both practical (Max is an ex-cop and road warrior), and draws on punk and kink designs to evoke a counterculture gone mad to the point of social breakdown, exploiting the thrill of the taboo to frighten and titillate the audience.

In particular, Ed is styled after Max in the second movie, having lost his family, been badly injured, and watched the world turn into an apocalypse. He's a broken man, withdrawn, violent, and deliberately cutting himself off from others to avoid getting hurt again. The plot of Mad Max 2 is him learning to open up and help others, making himself vulnerable to more loss, but more human in the process.

This ties directly into the themes of Our Flag - it's a deliberate intertext. Ed's emotional journey is also one from isolation and pain to vulnerability, community, and love. Mad Max (intentionally and unintentionally) explores themes of masculinity, violence, and power, while Max has become simplified in the popular imagination as a stoic, badass action hero rather than the more complex character he is, struggling with loss and humanity. Similarly, Our Flag explores masculinity, both textually (Stede is trying to build a less abusive pirate culture) and metatextually (the show champions complex, banal, and tender masculinities, especially when we're used to only seeing pirates in either gritty action movies or childish comedies).

Our Flag also draws on the specific countercultures of motorcycles, rockers, and gay/BDSM culture in its design and themes. Naturally, in such a queer show, one can't help but make the connection between leather pirates and leather daddies, and the design certainly nods at this, with its vests and studs. I always think about this guy, with his flat cap so reminiscient of gay leather fashions.

More overtly, though, Blackbeard and his crew are styled as both violent gangsters and countercultural rockstars. They rove the seas like a bikie gang, free and violent, and are seen as icons, bad boys and celebrities. Other pirates revere Blackbeard and wish they could be on his crew, while civilians are awed by his reputation, desperate for juicy, gory details.

This isn't all of why I like the costuming in Our Flag Means Death (especially season 1). Stede's outfits are by no means accurate, but they're a lot more accurate than most pirate media, and they're bright and colourful, with accurate and delightful silks, lace, velvets, and brocades, and lovely, puffy skirts on his jackets. Many of the Revenge crew wear recognisable sailor's trousers, and practical but bright, varied gear that easily conveys personality and flair. There is a surprising dedication to little details, like changing Ed's trousers to fall-fronts for a historical feel, Izzy's puffy sleeves, the handmade fringe on Lucius's red jacket, or the increasing absurdity of navy uniform cuffs between Nigel and Chauncey.

A really big one is the fact that they don't shy away from historical footwear! In almost every example above, we see the period drama's obsession with putting men in skinny jeans and bucket-top boots, but not only does Stede wear his little red-heeled shoes with stockings, but most of his crew, and the ordinary people of Barbados, wear low boots or pumps, and even rough, masculine characters like Pete wear knee breeches and bright colours. It's inaccurate, but at least it's a new kind of inaccuracy, that builds much more on actual historical fashions, and eschews the shortcuts of other, grittier period dramas in favour of colour and personality.

But also. At least it fucking says something with its leather.

[nanihirunkits]

#let it gooo ❄️❄️❄️

bonus:

[namchyoon]

RM_BOTTEGAVENETA.zip

[ghonorrhead]

gyjo omegaverse because IDGAF!!!

[ghost-proofbaby]

i saw your post about this and couldn’t stop thinking about it,,,, so here’s a speed paint of it

OH MY FUCKING GOD. OH MY GOD. YOU DID IT. YOU FUCKING DID IT!!! MY HEART IS SO HAPPY IM LEAPING WITH GENUINE JOY RIGHT NOW!!! THIS IS MY FAVORITE THING HOLY SHIT

[asilcorner]

Sky is great simply for giving out Dailies that involve needing a friend when none of your actual friends are online.

Like, hi, yes random stranger, we met once and have been sending light for 3 months and never ever talked, but can you give me a hug real quick, then walk away so I can teleport over to you and latch onto your hand and also fly around a bit with you??? Thanks!!!

[simpingforcys]

Idk if you've heard this suggestive KC fan audio before, but I feel like more people should know about it and I think it's def worth sharing. Again, sorry if you already saw this and I somehow missed the rb because it was posted on Tumblr back in the day

https://m.soundcloud.com/king-candy/kinkycandylines

Ooh, an audio! Lets hear it-!

OK HELLO HI THAT MADE ME STUMBLE BACK

"I wonder if you're cream filled. Would you like to be~?"

"You're just too tasty not to go for secon'ths~"

(INHALE) SIR. Say what you will about about King Candy capable of rizz or not, but you can not tell me that with that much confidence and manipulative tactics hidden so expertly under his sleeve he WOULDN'T have some flirting skills-

I need to draw these with my two girls, good GOD 😳 He whispers the first one inches away from me and I am G O N E.

[sevendutchies]

People in this fandom will really look at The Fool, Patience, Lacey, Carson, Sedric, Hest, Davvie, Lecter, Kennit, Ash/Spark, and yes, even Fitz himself, and still have the gall to call it queer bait.

These characters are explicitly queer, their actions impact the narrative, they are well written, and their identities are treated with respect. That is the best possible queer representation you could ask for in any story.

I've seen people on tumblr basing the likelihood of if they read this series on whether or not it's "actually gay" and I'm here to tell you that it is. There are queer characters. There are queer protagonists. And no matter what you see people in the fandom say, Robin Hobb wrote some amazing queer representation in a genre that rarely sees it at all.

TLDR;

Queer bait = disrespectful marketing ploy that exploits queer audiences

Queer bait ≠ "my two favorite characters never have sex"

[wickmitz]

How do you think about Frepper? I'm neutral about this ship, but the fans Frepper attitude towards confuses me, Ivy and Freckle have only been dating for a week and know each other superficially, but everyone already thinks that by the end of the comic they will get married, I think differently, I think that in the end they will break up with each other because they are too different personalities, I literally can't imagine that both of them will be happy with each other in marriage, Ivy is assertive and active, on the other hand Freckle is passive and just agrees with Ivy, this is not a guarantee of a healthy relationship where a partner completely dominates the other, plus to all that, I will not forget how their relationship started, Ivy just decided that they were dating, and without asking Freckle's permission, she just KISSED him, again without his permission, Frepper fans think that it's cute, but when I saw it, I thought "what the hell did I just see?", in general, it's strange for me that Frepper fans are okay with such things, of course later Freckle shows attraction to Ivy, showing that he likes her in some way too, but I still won't forget how their relationship started and how Freckle used to try to escape from Ivy when she squeezed his hand tightly and forced him to her …

I'm not against Frepper, but I don't understand his fans who don't see these issues and who treat other points of view on their relationship (like mine) as … um, as nonconformity? Fans from reddit are just obsessed with Frepper, I don't know about other networks but that's how it is on reddit, I think there are people who have my opinion but are afraid to say it because of fans, of course, I met Frepper fans there who normally accept such an opinion, but still there is a feeling that such a opinion cannot be told

Simply put, Ivy and Freckle are a couple that will eventually break up with each other unless there's an event between them in the comic that changes my opinion of this couple, but that's how I feel about Freckle for now. I didn't plan to express my opinion, but it happened that way, I hope you don't mind it

first and foremost, i don’t mind seeing someone express their opinion in my inbox! you and anyone else are free to do so, even if i may disagree. this blog’s entire existence was made for me to share my opinions ( and love! ) for lackadaisy, as well as engaging with other fans, because what else is the point of a fandom blog? and as far as i’m aware, this is unpopular opinion central! most of my thoughts aren’t exactly the ones with the most voice behind them i’ve found, so i welcome all manner of different views. every fan is entitled to their own perspectives and opinions, and should be allowed to share them as they please! but with that disclaimer out of the way, i’m more than willing to discuss frepper in its entirety.

for me, there’s little confusion i carry where it concerns this ship’s popularity amongst the fandom. freckle and ivy, if we are to strip them down to their bare essentials, are a rather stereotypically ‘cute’ relationship : people enjoy opposites ( see zibwick or vikdecai for example ) and there’s an endearing quality found in puppy love dynamics. seeing ivy wear the pants and drag a shy freckle around by his ankle makes for quality content in a way! think the ‘excuse me, but he asked for no pickles!’ meme … ivy and freckle very much fit that sort of mold, and it helps that most fans are too scared to ship them with other characters in the cast too, due to what they perceive to be a lack of options. thus, frepper is an extremely ‘safe’ ship! you cannot get in trouble for enjoying something that is not only canon, but is relatively adorable ; and so i don’t believe a lot of the fans are actually thinking too deeply about the likely endgame of it all. most don’t! it’s fun to ship, and that’s all they really need i think. it’s also very easy to dismiss ivy’s forwardness as a quirk of being a young girl who’s of her temperament, recklessly boycrazy although still carrying sweet intent. this behavior is easier to hand wave when neither ivy or freckle are experienced at the dating scene as well … freckle due to his extremely religious upbringing and hermit nature, and ivy because of viktor’s constant meddling, which would hold her back more than you’d think. with that said, i don’t think any of this is excessively complicated. some shippers are rather simple minded and do not care for details and characterization all too deeply. enjoying dynamics is, at its core, supposed to be fun -- which makes simple ships like frepper prime targets for a very vocal and tight knit fanbase. there are other things i could speculate about why these two may hit so pleasantly for others, like how there’s an underlying queer theme to it ( what with ivy being the pursuer and freckle the shy, blushing flower ) or that it’s tropey enough to hit the right spots for others … though it all boils back to mere speculation. perhaps they still have time to escape this gangster lifestyle and live happily ever after? and that appeals to the lackadaisy fans who still want some sort of happy ending? it’s all a combination of frepper being easy, i think, and containing two young cats who still haven’t done anything particularly ‘unforgivable’ yet action wise. this is a ship you can root for without an ounce of worry in your heart, and so on and so forth.

but although i understand why others are so vocal about them, i don’t exactly agree with fanon’s views either! while i heavily enjoy frepper, i enjoy them as they are, and that includes their looming flaws and inevitable tragedy. they are bound to break each other’s hearts a lot on their current path ; even if they were entirely perfect for one another, this lifestyle isn’t kind to anyone, meaning if they don’t separate, they could always be forced apart via bullets and such anyway. they are young and woefully inexperienced in a manner of things, the last thing they need is the stress of a rumrunner life driving their every action, you know? i know people see them getting out together, and that is likely on the table! i do see that in many ways, but i’m also of the opinion that ivy and freckle will diverge onto different paths at some point and temporarily call it quits. from where the comic currently stands and given my view on ivy’s arc, i see her growing disillusioned with where she is and the honor and fun she saw within it as a royal spectator will fade ; she will become wary, fearful, and her resilience will die … meanwhile freckle will embrace it, similar to his cousin, fully understanding what it is and what he’s getting into ( like rocky, again ) but being unable to leave his refuge. i know lots of people think freckle will leave the lackadaisy first, but given his old concepts and former title as one of mitzi’s ‘trouble boys’, i think he will become lost in the sauce for a myriad of reasons. frankly i enjoy that twist on their relationship! since i believe ivy’s character development will revolve around maturing, changing as time stretches forward, because her character is ever growing, what with her entire schtick being the fact she’s everything a 1920s girl was during those times. she embodies that unladylike youth and manipulative sweetness, so i’d imagine a lot of her path is falling from such naive thrill seeking and stumbling upon a harsh reality. she will mature, and the very thing that should make their relationship stronger will be what divides them indefinitely. everything they have is founded on this bloody, varnished soaked ground after all … they are young adults who are experiencing what closeness feels like outside of family or platonic friends for the first time, so naturally they will overindulge in their own amateur games ; find respite in the boogie and kiss like couples do on the silver screen, laugh about it, talk about everything and nothing at all … relish in each other’s warmth and stupidly loyal protection. i’m sure frepper will grow closer before any falling out, because as it stands, it’s one of the few things they have in such a scary situation that feels comforting and kind. they will impact each other in the fundamental ways first relationships do and, to move towards your biggest gripe, do things they’ll regret or allow things to happen to them that they’re not entirely okay with.

ivy is very forceful with freckle initially, albeit in her typical saturated way ; and i can see why that would be hard to parse! especially when freckle spends a majority of their first scenes together squirming away and hiding, trying to duck her affections and bolt for it. there is a lot of boundary crossing between them! but not in a necessarily malicious way … like most things with frepper, this circles back to their mutual inexperience and how, in a lot of ways, this is their first ‘serious’ romantic relationship ever. and it’s rather common for such firsts to involve gray areas, since neither party is entirely sure of what their own boundaries are just yet! while freckle did appear frightened by ivy at first, it’s important to note that tracy’s mentioned him having a flight response whenever girls flirt with him … he is prone to run away instinctively, which if you consider his extremely religious upbringing, isn’t exactly a surprise. nina would no doubt look down upon freckle engaging with girls his age due to what most girls his age are currently doing in the roaring 20s they’re living in. sneaking out and engaging in illegal activities, dancing in a way that would disgust most of the more traditional and older generation, casually engaging in any manner of sexual activity before marriage, etc etc. and this isn’t even listing freckle’s cagey nature due to an incident we know was bad enough to send rocky packing for years, and fundamentally changed freckle himself at such a young and impressionable age. he is … very troubled! and rather scared of himself and the world around him … at this stage in life, freckle is perpetually unable to make any progress towards anything he may want, and so i have little problem myself with ivy mostly taking the lead. when left to his own devices and allowed to choose outside of influence, freckle did in fact sneak out of his mother’s house to go to the lackadaisy, surely well aware that ivy’s intention had been romantically inclined. so, to me, he has always liked her ; perhaps found her cute, in a shallow way, saw her eccentric behavior as endearing and frightening in equal measure, and while he’s still wading into this whirlwind pool unsteady and shaken, he -- wouldn’t mind it if ivy pushed a little more, or moved him around to her ( and what she perceives to be, their ) liking. perhaps this dynamic is familiar enough to him that it becomes comforting, since rocky was very much the same way in their adolescence. tugging freckle around and pulling his tail for whatever rocky wanted them to do, with little care for whatever his baby cousin desired at the time, ignoring his protests and chasing him ; nobody’s at fault here either, kids are extremely self absorbed and this is a flaw they’ll usually mature past, and while ivy and freckle are adults during the comic, i don’t think ivy’s outgrown this linear view on things just yet. she is extremely entitled! she is used to being the apple of everyone’s eye at the speakeasy due to her jazz baby status as atlas may’s goddaughter, and this gangster connection excites and awes the ladies she attends classes with at her university too. ivy pepper is used to getting her way and this has only fueled her determined attitude, her ‘pull it up by the bootstraps’ mindset, and in many ways, this is something of a flaw for her. it’s not bad to be confident and headstrong, although when you add that into a dangerous mix of rumrunning and gunslinging, it may become a problem rather quickly. but i digress! point is, ivy and freckle are hardly at fault for the awkward way they handled the start of their relationship, when it’s so new and fresh to them both.

neither of them have boundaries at this moment, as they either have no clue what those are or simply haven’t realized they should set them. so, in turn, there are things that the other may do that could cause their partner discomfort … and it’s mostly done out of obliviousness and good intentions and your classic dose of intense affection. doesn’t mean it isn’t messed up to a degree, but i think it’s rather realistic, and is a hard truth that comes with many first relationships of that sort. sometimes you don’t know how to say ‘no,’ or you agree and regret agreeing later, or perhaps you simply don’t understand there’s certain things you aren’t ready for or genuinely just don’t like. again, it’s a very muddied area, and the two of them are vaguely navigating what is mostly foreign to them. they’re bound to mess up! so i ivy some slack here, and applaud tracy on the realistic writing more than anything usually. young love also happens to be a great device to use for inexperienced characters finding themselves, through the good and bad of their relationship, and frepper is all about that. maybe freckle will inevitably bring up how he feels like he would’ve preferred it had ivy asked him out properly, or gave him time to court her in a traditional fashion … and she will be surprised ( and a little wounded ) by this, since she had never considered it before … too used to her way of things to realize there’s another path they could take. i think this aspect of the relationship is important, and i can understand wishing that more frepper shippers would view it as such, or comment on it's morally gray nature without just calling it ‘cute’ and leaving it at that.

tldr : they will most certainly break up at some point, maybe even multiple times! tracy has said before that they both have some serious maturing to do if their relationship is to be long lasting, and i doubt that maturing will happen to them both at once … since they have different things to work on emotionally. but they will probably strongarm some major personal development within each other, as well as love one another with a fierceless abandon that most kids do. i could see them getting married, i could see them not, but i agree that if they were to be wed happily, they’d have significant hurdles to overcome. but personally, frepper is something i adore mostly due to the impact they’re bound to cause each other, and even if they are to separate and find someone new and more fitting, they’ll always remember one another -- perhaps fondly, and sadly, and with some anger. a time they’d like to forget, but a person they’d like to remember … which is my cup of tea overall! they much more interest me as they presently are anyway, where i can fiddle around with their budding romance and friendship bonding. and as lackadaisy grows in popularity, i do hope there’s more frepper fans who see their complexity and flaws and explore them with all of it in mind.

anyway! i hope this was coherent, and that it was obvious that i agreed with you for the most part. i haven’t really talked about frepper before with anyone so many of these thoughts sort of burst out of me! and i feel like i have more to elaborate upon, but for the sake of simplicity i kept this short. oh well! surely this is enjoyable and informative regardless.

[kyunyu3]

[humble--bard]

[chasedeys]

HI ME ASKING ABOUT JJKOC. CAN WE TALK ABOUT THEM AFTER THAT RAMS GAME. CAN WE TALK ABOUT IT

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 STRAIGHT UP ANGSTTTTTTTT TALKKKKKKKK goddddddddd oh but like. disclaimer lmaooo i keep saying that for all my shit but for real i wasn't really present for that game 😭 i was away for my death i fear so like. i know bits and pieces of that game by which i mean i saw koc mad and jj fucking. devastated. and like. ashen faced. and like. that pr perfect face locker room interview. and answers im assuming lmao truly suchhhh a fascinating man the way he alwayssss has the perfect answer on hand!! was he built this way brick by brick coming into the league lol how has ja'marr differed so loudly from him in this aspect when they're so similar in so many other aspects ANYWAYS MORE UNDER THE CUT 😭 warning mentions of joemarr because of-fucking-course.....

but for real that rams game that i didn’t compute at all bc i was off tumblr and like. came back and was flabbergasted. holy shittttttt. justins face (beautiful. haunting.)…….koc spitting mad (hot. compelling.)……….oh my god…………....

but like. okay. so im like. not that good at angst tbh LMAOOO im more of a crack and joke kind of shitpost feel-good writer i fear but i will delve deeper into Comfort Dynamics!!

the thing is to meeee the way i seee itttttt ->

koc is soooo soft. he's such a?? good coach???? a players-coach is the word people use i think? you can see how much he cares so fucking deeply for his players not just like. as an athlete he has to move around as chess pieces on a board or players on a field but like. as a person. wait sorry i gotta mention this lol i've sent you this when we were like. comparing the vikes and lions game as like a basically who loves their coach more game LMAOOOO (also can i just say. it's objectively fucking hilarious. that dan campbell said. see you next week. to koc. and um. um. um. BUT ANYWAYS.) but do you know depaola has like a mug of my coach is hotter than your coach aksaskfl THAT'S SO???? (justin and harri also have a hawk statue?? with patched up holes these men are so. just. god why are they like this akfaklsf) BUT LIKE you can seeeeee you know that he loves them and they love him and they're comfortable with him!! that's speciallllll arhrgrhrghh soooo happy he's extending lmao BUT TO THE JJKOC OF IT ALL SORRY got distracted by ko's insane charisma lmao

koc's soooo soft, he has sooo much fun teasing his players and them teasing him back, and justin is no exception!!! seeking him out and throwing at him and needling at him and justin doing his nasal ass laugh delightedly whenever ko gets within even 30 yards of his vision and needling him right backkkk they have so much funnn teasing each other its so!!!! cute to me!!!!!!!

like. that's comfort!! that's a nice ass basis to have for a relationship!!!! something to look forward to when you know you're getting to a shitty ass situation and you know you're in the last quarter it's the last 3 minutes and your quarterback (sam....im also so sad about sam btw.....that clip of sam hoisted to the air and ko looking fondly at his team and then. flash forward to their last game. wow.) just threw another fucking pick (i have no idea how the game went btw lmao just that it was um. shit. and sam was um. shit.) because he's throwing to the ghosts of his teammates past apparently who the fuck knows and this is the nth time of your fucking life that you're falling short in the post-season and you're looking to your left and it's your coach and his face is rigid and he's staring at you evenly but he can't keep looking at you he has to be at 5 places at once and you close your eyes and all you can see is darkness but you're the face of the franchise the star of the game there's nothing dark about you not since 20 fucking 19 the stadium lights pulsing into the back of your eyelids as the crowd roars disjointedly pounds your eardrums making you sway and stutter and feel like you're disappearing and reappearing in and out of reality but if you just dig deep you can imagine him—him—pressing his cold fingers into your bicep during winter practice making you yelp in affront and imagine looking up and seeing him laughing at you crinkly eyed and rosy cheeked and so fucking handsome it makes your heart clench up and you hope he doesn't see the way it's leaping forward right at him and he's saying to do your stretches i get you're 20-something but come on now and with that you're shrinking back to reality but you keep that minute paradox of cold-warmth loud-quiet crowded-alone memory to center yourself so you won't break down into tears to be caught in front of all those 4k cameras waiting to capture their next 30 second viral clip to burn over and over and over until you're nothing but just a typed out what a waste of talent there in the vikings get justin jefferson out of there in every single social media account you aren't even really a part of but can't get out of because you have a record breaking contract saying you have to have them. you look to the left and he's gone but the memory of him is etched in you so deep it's enough. you sit on your bench and wait for another chance to fight and it might not be enough but knowing that he's there is enough for you for anything. your hands are so fucking cold but at least that minute warmth isn't just a minute, not really. wow. not rereading all that <3 hope there isn't a typo or grammar error and it makes sense <3 and like not disgustingly corny wow should i reread it.. no ok wow no. BUT ANYWAYS.

justin simultaneously looks like he wants to break down into tears and like he wants to pick a fucking fight. something like ja’marr lmao augh love me a good justin ja’marr parallels why is that i think like. they’re both so good at picking fights and shit at letting people be kind to them. (well no. i think like. justin's better at knowing who he can pick fights with and who he can't. and keeping people away via spinning words and poof they're gone with literally zero trouble. while ja'marr's better at ignoring people because he cares very little for those who aren't really up to his standards whatever the fuck that is. but well that leads to not so good things. but yeah very good at picking fights when they really want to lmao.) and so confused at people wanting to be soft with them. at people choosing to not be like high strung competitive and sharp the way they usually are with each other (which they love and appreciate about each other, btw)!! (see: tee with ja’marr! joe pursuing ja’marr with like. a way that he isn’t used to. a devotion he isn’t used to being on the receiving end. MOREEE ABT THIS IN THE ENDDD which is so very typical sorry).

like justin is not used to. like wait okay so. you see ko poking fun at him!! teasing smiles pokey and jokes and jabs and sharp at times knows when to make it pointy but knows boundaries and that’s the kind of thing he’s used to! that’s the bro ish friendship he’s used to in lsu etc etc competition with ja’marr being a receiver under joe etc etc butttt. kos also so good at like. soothing him. he’s good at picking him apart. being soft with him. when justins needling at him trying to get a rise kos being indulging and when justins purposefully trying to get him angry at him he’s intuitive and gets justin to settle down and breathe. gets him to unclench his jaw lower his spikes soften his brow unsharpen his tiger claws he still wields even if he isn’t a tiger in name anymore and the first time ko ever does this justin runs away spooked new coach what the hell is he doing. i think justin didn't have the best experience with his previous coaches too? not sure abt this lmao but like. koc is definitely a wholeeee ass upgrade im sure. and that’s so. he’s intrigued. he’s charmed. kos always offering him a handsome smile. a warm hand on his shoulder on his bicep on his hip. a little how many times do i have to tell you to stretch i get you’re young but come on now. a little hey made some cinnamon rolls yesterday you want some? c’mon now you’re fit you don’t need any diet grab three i got you. here you look cold wear my jacket keep it it looks good on you. clicking his tongue applying antiseptic on his turf burn and pressing bandages over it even when justin laughs over his mothering tendencies. that overly long ass explanation of his mic'ed up moment too btw that shit was so. why the hellllllllllll did he go on such a long tangent just saying shit about his 'world class relationship' with justin just to say he was mic'ed up while pretty princess justin jefferson laid there all pretty and proper trying to stretch oh my god. ko you are so....and justin you are so......

but anyways. post game. silent. bus ride. plane. vikings stadium? im assuming? restless. justin fucking struggling but he's always been picture perfect. he's already said his peace with sam, who's clearly haunted (i truly do not know what to say about sam 😭. like....girl.......also question is like jj mccarthy playing next year lol. will sam like. return...he's also in the probowl right. which. wow.) and koc finally has a chance to lock in justin jefferson who has been avoiding him for some reason. clearlyyyy this man knows that ko is the person who would. understand him most. who would. pick apart his bullshit pr perfect exterior. then pick apart his next layer of spikes and snarls and a whole other set of perfect words to be said to instigate a fight. always knowing exactly what to fucking say. justin jefferson. is his major communications lmao what the hell made him to be this way i am sooooo. and so koc has his hands all up around the sides of his neck even when jj is snarling at him to shut the fuck up who the fuck does he think he is acting like justin is some kind of child to tend over he's an adult he doesn't need to be coddled over a loss this isn't some high school rusted consolation trophy—and koc has his head ducked down to press over justin's forehead, shushing him, telling him he's so fucking proud of him this season, telling him he's one of a fucking kind, that he's never been so amazed at a player before, that he's never had the pleasure of coaching someone so talented before, that he wished he played with someone like justin—with justin, that he was justin's quarterback, if he was even worthy of him, that he'd do just about anything to get justin a fucking ring, and justin's breaking into tears at the press of skin, at the spill of words, at the sincerest of voice, at the way this man believes in him like no other before, at the way that even with the loss he knows that it never really is one because he has it with him, with koc, so whatever the outcome is—it's okay. god that's corny as shit im so sorry but anyways they kiss. salty as hell because justin's crying all those pent up tears. and ko's kissing up his wet cheeks over his lids pressing down on his cheekbones telling him he's so pretty even when he cries but hey isn't his head hurting why doesn't he let up and show him his pretty smile instead so ko can also get to some healing of his own and justin starts beating at his stomach smiling through his tears complaining thats so fucking cheesy oh my god did he just imply justins smile heals him shut the fuck uppppp. they don't fuck? maybe they fuck who knows. they're exhausted thoughhhhh so maybe they fuck like. the day after 😭

ALSO. IT'S SO. all of justins faces of like. him staring besotted heart eyes at koc is so. wait no i'll talk abt this in the other ask lmao BUT LIKE this is truly insane to me....the hell is wrong with him.......girl the fuck.........and i think like. koc has this man looking at him like this and has him. pupils dilating like crazy....

(a little joemarr off tangent lol boy jjmarr parallels sorry they’re like. twin flames. to me. joes like this to ja’marr too but not exactly? joe isn’t soft per see. he’s so fucking pushy he’s an entitled brat to ja’marr's space at times and that’s the thing that draws ja’marr to him because ja’marr has never once had someone be that into him. be that interested in him as a person not just as an athlete or as a warm body. joe wants all of him and that makes him cave. joes isn’t naturally soft but he’s learning how to be because its ja’marr—it makes him want to be and that fucks ja’marr upppp looking at this man being this way about himmmm is it really a wonder that ja’marrs a bit well a lot lmao crazy about him right back. aauguhgu corny asssss but whatever we move on i have to. go 😭)

also. if i had even a reach of understanding of the vikings rosters personality the way i do the bengals. how is that like oh my god i fucking adore the bengals i could write fucking pages of their stupidity and like. characters and personality??? like i get them?? sort of. obviously surface stuff what they show and what not but like. i can't do it about the other team rosters???? pisses me off. why is that. i watch their shit too. sort of lmao. i think bengals are just. truly my beloved 😭

[xariarte]

9, 16, & 17 for the end of year asks ❤️

Technically not the end of the year anymore, but time is arbitrary (also I thought I'd have time to answer these before the end of the year but then I did not...RIP).

Hope it's still okay if I answer these after the end of last year. 💀

9. Best month for you this year?

I think November was my best month. A lot of things that needed to click into place in my personal life finally did, and things started progressing, whereas previously things just seemed to be at a standstill. I also went outside more than I expected to despite the colder weather, so that was great. 💖

16. Post a picture from the beginning of this year.

I will be breaking this rule because I have more than one photo, but at the beginning of the year I took on this drawing challenge called "100 Heads Challenge" where you draw 10 portrait heads in 10 days.

I did not have time to draw that many heads every day nor did I complete the challenge (maybe this year I will), but here are the photos from my sketchbook:

I had to cover up Kelly and Donte because they were egregious. Tbh Mikal, SGA and Dario are kind of toeing the line of "is this good enough to show" but I think I will forgive my mistakes for those three.

I learned a lot about drawing quickly, drawing different facial features like beards and various hairstyles that I normally would never draw, and I highly enjoyed it even though drawing so much everyday wore me out.

17. Post a picture from the end of this year.

My college bestie and I went to the Distillery District Winter Village in Toronto for the first time! It was great. We both loved it and wanted to stay there all night, but alas...good things really do come to an end.

[athousandbyeol]

thank you for making my 2023 <3

to,

@kxttxnkxttxn @a-slut-for-vegaspete @pxvvar @youdontloveme-yet @hoppipolla @forcebook @seatawinans @forcebookish @daymork @ellasaru12 @sailingsnow @topmewera @first-kanaphan @25shadesoffebruary @vecchiozooeee @shakalakaaa @tomatoland @forcebookcorner @bookishforce @djeterg19 @itsmelb @i-got-the-feels @eveindtub @milkpansa @chinho-kun @frostluvrs @writerwithoutsound @fuckingcrescendos @nattawinlove-andmygaytea @dragonsareawesome123 @extremelybabygirl @vhsbabyxx and everyone who i have ever interacted with this year,

thank you so much for everything. you guys made my 2023 better and brighter. thank you for finding me. thank you for liking anything i put out on my platforms. thank you for being my friend. i hope 2024 will be a prosperous, blissful and exciting year for all of you <3

[philiponmycracker]

David (Tom Hulce) and Theo (Jeroen Krabbé) - Shadowman (dir. Piotr Andrejew, 1988)