#thank you again ruth!!!! this was really fun to write out and i may have cried while writing a few bits but it's fiiiine

[softguarnere]

Hi bestie!! I've been noticing a *SEVERE* lack of Skip content on Tumblr so if you're not too busy, could you please write a lil oneshot with Skip using the prompt "Wait, you think I'm cute?" please?? Thank you so much in advance!! 💖

Also this is a total side note but for some reason the song "Dandelions" by Ruth B just gives me major Skip vibes, like, a sunny day with your boyfriend who's also your best friend. Just adorable 🙈

I See Forever in Your Eyes

Warren "Skip" Muck x reader

A/N: Bestie, you are SO RIGHT 👏🏼 Skip is so underrated, and we're going to have to fix that 😉 Especially since I've been craving content for him ever since reading FOF and seeing him get into hijinks with Alix and Malarkey 😌 I hope you enjoy this one!

(As always, this is written for the fictional depiction from the show - no disrespect to the real life veterans!) 💕🕊️

Warnings: language, mentions of war

There’s nothing particularly amusing about asking someone to pass the shoe polish, but your bunkmate lets out a chuckle nonetheless as she tosses it to you.

“What’s so funny?”

Amy shakes her head, looking over your shoulder in the direction of the door. “Oh, nothing. Just that someone can’t seem to stay away from you – even when we’re in the women’s barracks.”

“Hiya, (Y/N)!” The bed beside you sinks as someone flops down onto it, bumping his shoulder into yours and almost causing you to drop the boots you’ve been diligently shining.

“Skip!” You scold. You smack him lightly on the arm, but there’s no malice in it. If anything, the gesture only serves to broaden the smile that already graces his lips. “You’re not supposed to be in the women’s barracks.”

Skips eyes widen. He glances around, placing a hand over his heart in mock shock as if he’s only just realizing where he is. “The women’s barracks?! I was looking for the latrine.” He shrugs. “Well, since I’m already here . . .” He leans back on the bed and flashes you a winning smile. “Guess who actually managed to keep their pass this week?”

“Talbert.”

“Nope.”

“Sisk?”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Hmm . . . Well it certainly couldn’t be you for once, could it?”

“Ding ding ding – we have a winner!”

Now it’s your turn to feign shock. “No, really? However did you manage to hold onto it?”

“I was extra careful. But what about you? Did you manage to keep yours?”

“As a matter of fact, I did.”

Skip claps his hands together, a loud, happy staccato that echoes through the barracks. “Well then let’s cut a rug, jitterbug! We’re going dancing tomorrow night!” With that, he takes his leave from the barracks, leaving you smiling as you finish shining your shoes, and causing Amy to laugh.

“What’s so funny now?”

Your fellow paratrooper chuckles. “Oh, nothing. Just something about young love.” She laughs again when your boot slips out of your hand and tumbles onto the floor. She’s finished with her boots before you can collect yourself enough to ask what she means and to tell her that it’s not like between you and Skip.

No matter how much you may wish that it were.

--

Visiting English pubs on a weekend pass is far more fun than taking a weekend pass back in the States. Half of the fun is because hitting the town is different when you’ve got your polished jump wings displayed proudly on your chest and your pants bloused around your Corcoran boots. Strutting into a pub or a dance hall with an outfit that clearly proclaims I am a paratrooper – one of the elite! never fails to make things more interesting – whether because of the positive attention from the townspeople that lead to offers for dances and free drinks, or the negative attention from other service members that lead to gruff arguments and bloody noses. Never a dull moment with the right company in the right place.

As you push open the door of the pub and take in the sounds of music and laughter, part of you wishes that you were back in a dress like you would have been in the States. Then you could have done your hair and makeup and – even if for only a night – allowed yourself to pretend that you were a regular girl dancing with a handsome service member before he shipped off into combat. There’s still an elegance to showing off your uniform and impressing many with the fact that you are not only a paratrooper, but a part of the first female paratrooper program, though. It’s just different.

“(Y/N)!” A voice calls from across the pub. Through all the music and the jiving bodies, Malarkey has managed to spot your entrance. Hand clutching a drink and raised above his head to avoid a spill, the Oregon boy weaves through the crowd until he’s by your side. Your friend smiles, breathless. “Where ya been? We’ve been waiting all night!”

Playfully, you nudge his arm. “Awe, did you miss me, Malarkey?”

“Oh yeah, you know I missed my favorite dance partner.” In a single swig, he downs what’s in his glass and stubs out his cigarette in an ashtray on a nearby table. He offers you his hand.

“Oh no you don’t, Donnie Boy!” Skip slides between the two of you, ever present grin lighting up the room as he appears. “I do believe that I shall be having the first dance with lovely Private (Y/L/N).”

Malarkey takes a step back, hand over his heart. “Well Skipper, you could have at least had the decency to tell me that before I snubbed out my smoke.”

The look that crosses Skip’s face is one that you know all too well – he has an idea of some sort. The next thing that you know, he’s pushed you and Malarkey together and gives your friend a slap on the back. “Actually, you take this dance. I’ll grab the next one.” He recedes into the thicket of the crowd before you can question it.

A lively tune is struck up by the band, causing the energy in the pub to soar as you and Malarkey make your way to the dance floor, carving out a space for yourselves as you twirl and jump and laugh through the whole thing. You’re out of breath by the time that it ends, your cheeks sore from smiling so much. You applaud the band with everyone else as you wait for the next song to start.

“Alright, my turn,” Skip says, swaggering up to you and Malarkey. You’ve never understood how he manages to disappear and reappear from the crowd the way that he does, but he seems to fit in everywhere that he goes so well that you know it can’t be hard for him. He holds out his hand to you. “Mind if I cut in?”

“Not at all.”

The band’s next song starts up, much slower than the last. The mood of the crowd changes automatically, going from one of high energy and adrenaline to one of new love and desire as couples pair off onto the dance floor.

“Where did you go?” You question, casting a glance around the pub. “What lucky gal got that last dance with the pride and joy of Tonawanda?”

Skip chuckles. “Truth be told, no one did.”

“Oh?”

“No, I was too busy trying to request a song with the band.”

“And what song might that be?”

“This one.” Is it your imagination, or in the low lights of the pub, does your friend blush ever so slightly? Maybe he wonders the same thing about you as your hands grow warm against his. You might be in the dim lights and smokey atmosphere of the pub, but dancing with him feels like being surrounded by sunshine and cloudless skies on the perfect summer day. “I wanted to talk to you.”

There are better places to talk than the dance floor, but your heart is fluttering in your chest like a bird threatening to fly from the coop and you can’t find the words to question him. If the words would come to you, what would you even say?

“I’ve been thinking,” he pauses, like he’s waiting for you to crack the usual Thought I smelled smoke line that you, Penkala, and Malarkey are so apt to throw around. When your breath hitches in your throat instead, he bites his lip before continuing. “Fuck. I don’t wanna mess this up.”

“Mess what up?” Effortlessly, the two of you execute the spin that comes with the next line of the song. When you gravitate together again, like planets falling into alignment, you’re met with a worried expression on his face – something that looks unnatural on him.  

The next few bars of the song press on while silence floats between you. Worry – or something akin to it – settles into the little atmosphere between you. You keep waiting for him to say more as Skip’s eyes dance over everyone and anything else in the pub besides you.

“You’re one of my best friends.” His voice is soft, his eyes are sincere; he’s never looked more serious. “I don’t wanna mess that up when I tell you that I feel differently about you than other girls.”

You stumble on the next step. He catches your waist with ease. If this is going where you think it’s going . . . But you would hate to assume, and to assume incorrectly at that.

Skip rushes on. “It’s okay if you don’t feel that way. With the big jump finally coming up, I just wanted to make sure that you knew before we went, or else I would spend my whole life regretting that I didn’t tell you. And I know that might make the jump harder – “ He shakes his head, exasperated. “I swear I knew what I wanted to say when I started this.”

“It’s okay,” you assure him, your words bringing his eyes back to you. “I think it’s cute when you ramble.”

Standing so close, it would be impossible to miss the way that his breath hitches in his throat. “Wait, you think I’m cute?”

“Well yeah.” There’s no use in denying it. Not when he’s allowed himself to be vulnerable instead of brushing things off with humor like he normally would. And not when the jump is sure to be soon. He’s right: it would be hard to go about life full of regret and wondering how different things could have been if you had made a different jump – a leap of faith into the game of chance that is sharing your truest and most sincere feelings with someone that you have so many tender feelings of affection for.

“Not just when you ramble,” you admit, fully committing now, heart beating hard in your chest. “You’re cute, Skip. I’ve always thought so.”

A tentative smile pulls at the corners of his mouth. “Well I’ve always thought that you were stunning.”

On instinct, you lean forward and fix your head against his chest, just like all the couples on the dance floor are doing. His hand secures itself more firmly on your waist. The little world around you is something that you’ve only imagined a handful of times, and never for long – there’s hardly a private moment in the Army, and you’ve never allowed yourself to get your hopes up.

But experiencing the real thing . . . You pray that you won’t blink to wake up and find that it’s all been a dream.

“What do we do now?” You whisper.

He squeezes your hand. “Whatever you want. We can give it a shot.”

“God, yes.” His chest rumbles as he chuckles at your enthusiasm.

All too soon, the song ends. Couples all over the dance floor slowly come out of their amorous haze and applaud the band. You can feel Skip looking at you. You gaze back at him, not quite ready to break the spell that’s settled over the two of you.

There is a war going on. You don’t know where it will take you. But you’re a paratrooper, and risk taking is part of the job. No one can know for certain what will happen, or how long this new thing will last between you.

Looking into Skip’s eyes, though, you can see his answer: forever, if you’ll allow it.

And you will. Of course you will.

[thatbanditqueen]

Here to leave my review on the long awaited Chapter 3 (its okay we forgive you) -

FIRST OF ALL, Ida and Saul are my spirit animals and favorite characters seriously. They so help in keeping the story light hearted and comedic even when Elvis is making me wanna slap him on behalf of Becky! It was relatable and hilarious when Saul was the last one to find out who Elvis was the men in my family are exactly the same. Ida is Captain of the Becky Butt x Elvis ship please she was all for her niece getting some under her roof, we love a supportive queen. And Elvis is a ridiculously charming man - but ridiculous nonetheless. Poor Jerry having to drive them down there, look for a nonexistent lost ring and then give up his comfort all so Elvis could get some. And Becky Butt, baby, my heart is breaking for you already because yes I want them to be happy but I can only imagine how much heartache is to come before Elvis opens his damn eyes!!! That man can be so stubborn. Also, the conversation they had, the way Elvis is always trying to deflect and distract and go on the offensive it gave me Anita phone call vibes 101 I lived for it. Elvis winning over Ruth so quickly, why am I not surprised? The man is a child himself. But with time I know he’s gonna be the best step daddy. Ruth picking up the Becky Butt moniker - LMAO. That names gonna stick and I’m 100% for it. Becky’s such a good mom, always putting her daughter first and making sure she’s comfortable/okay. She’s got a child streak in her that I think pulls Elvis in because he does as well but she has a maturity he never mastered in my opinion due to everyone in his life bending to his every whim. And can I please tell you how grateful that I am that you really lean in to the gorgeous physicality that was Big Daddy. Talking about his stomach, about his largeness, all of it, so many fics hardly allude to it meanwhile I want to suffocate underneath that man. Becky is living my dream. Thanks for updating, what a delightful read it was 💗

Dear Bri,

Thanks for taking the time to write this, it is so very reaffirming to hear what you think! Ida and Saul are so fun to write, I can hear their voices in my head, they are sort of a composite of different family members/friends i grew up with. For some reason, a lot of older women in my life, including my grandmother, were absolute sex instigators. My granny once told me, with all seriousness, that all i needed to do to solve a relationship issue with my partner at the time was just to have sex and forget about the whole fight.... hahaha. SO, yes, Becky may have gotten knocked up young, but she has never been as carefree or in tune with her sensuality as Ida, and Ida wants to really make that happen for her :) I don't know, I could just see Elvis pulling something like this with Jerry, I see it as part of his ego/inferiority duality, like he's somewhat drunk the koolaid that he's some sort of really cool rock star, but also, if he was really confident, he'd just tell people what was really going on, ughh, he was such a cute, clueless dork/ total dick in so many delectable ways, I really enjoy playing with him and writing this fic. And I love love LOVE BDE's physicality, though I will be the first to admit that @eliseinmemphis's posts about worshiping big daddy elvis were fundamental to my own burgeoning fixation with this era Elvis. I need him to crush me. I need to play with his tummy and the waddle under his jowls. Becky is all of us.... and I think her earthy, latent sensual earth mother nature finds BDE attractive and is drawn to him both as a lover, and as wounded boy she wants to nurture.... or will be moreso when/if he gets his head out of his ass and gets over himself enough.

Thanks again for taking the time to give me this feedback!!!! I know it was hard to wait for this chapter, although, in my defense, the wait between ch 1 and ch 2 was a lot longer, life is a little more settled and i think it shouldn't be more than two weeks or so until I post ch 4. I already have somewhat of an outline/set of ideas. But I hate giving a date, because I always seem to miss any deadline I set for myself, and then I publish as soon as I finish, when I really should let things sit and do a proper proofreading job. But don't be afraid to give me a nudge, I've finished chapters because someone asked for it and it motivates me.

all my love,

norAHHHH

v me seeing your message :)

[prettylittlelyres]

2023 - My Year in Writing

Hello, friends! Happy New Year to all of you!

I hope 2024 is fabulous and fun... but also very calm and soothing, even if it needs to be a little bit boring. I think most of us need a slightly boring year after whatever mess 2023 was. All I see - all over the internet - today are posts about how 2023 was a giant mess for nearly everyone, and while that makes me feel less alone, it also makes me a little sad for everyone else who had trouble with it.

I am sure 2024 will be better, because, for goodness sake, it can't get worse. And, on the bright side, the Gävlebocken (Gävle Goat) has been gobbled up by jackdaws, and I firmly believe that to be a good omen. May 2024 bring us abundance as the goat brought abundance to the birds of Gävle. (We derve some tasty abundance.)

But, with the start of a new year comes the end of an old one, and that means it's time for me to write about all the writing I did in 2023.

This was the year I tried to be kind to myself, and I certainly succeeded in that. I'm proud of the leeway I have given myself this year, and - perhaps ironically - I have achieved more because of it. Letting myself work without pressure has always been difficult for me, but I think I finally learnt to do it in 2023.

So, here's what I did.

The best thing I did was start joining in with the writers' Discord server I joined last year. I lurked for a long time, never really piping up in the group chats, because I never really felt like I had anything to say. I didn't write anything like as much in 2022 as I wanted to (would you believe I started the year with a bullet journal page covered in New Year's Resolutions for Writing that included "finish redrafting 2 novels", "write 2 novels from scratch" and "plot another 2 novels"?) and I was upset with myself about it. At the end of 2022, I found out that I'd been quite ill for a while, and started getting better, and I decided I'd be kinder to myself from the start of 2023.

So, whenever I wrote anything, I mentioned it in the group chat where we share our daily wordcounts and achievements (no matter how "small", they are all worth celebrating), and started chatting to the other writers here and there. We had meetups on Zoom, and communal sprints on Twitch that really helped me get back into the swing of writing happily in January and February. I started to feel like a proper writer again, like part of a real community, and I can't quite express how thankful I am to the server for helping me get that feeling back.

I got 78,000 words written in the first 2 months of the year, mostly working on a character study for a story that I've put on hold until I can work out exactly what I want to happen to its characters. I've explored how they'd behave in certain situations, and thrown problems at them to see how they cope (badly!). But a story needs a storyline, and that storyline needs to be coherent, so I've mothballed the project until a good one comes along.

I also started journalling about my reading in the first few months of the year. I did an extensive study of "The Restless Dark" by Erica Waters, and absolutely loved it, filling an entire notebook with my thoughts on what was happening and what might happen next. I haven't kept up such a meticulous habit for the rest of the year, but it helped me focus on reading in a way I haven't done in previous years.

In the end I read 40 books, and the ones I enjoyed most were, "Tell Me I'm Worthless," by Alison Rumfitt, and, "All the Young Men," by Ruth Coker-Burks.

"Tell Me I'm Worthless," is a horror novel about how extremists will manipulate traumatised people to get them on side, but its core message feels like, "It's always possible to recover."

"All the Young Men" is Coker-Burks' memoir about nursing and providing community support to people living with - and dying from - AIDS in Hot Springs, Arkansas, all through the height of the crisis. Heartbreaking and heartwarming in equal parts, it reminds us all that, no matter how bleak things are, someone, somewhere, will want to help.

In April 2020, I started writing "Journal of a Pandemic", which has turned out to be a much longer project than I ever anticipated it to be. It's a chronicle of my life in the COVID19 pandemic, observing the changes I'm seeing in the world at large as well as in my own personal life. I wish I hadn't been able to write it this year, or at least that I'd been able to rename it - "Journal of a..." well, just about anything would be better than a pandemic, I think - but it's still happening. COVID19 still hasn't gone away, and I still can't go out in public without a mask on, because I'm high-risk. The bright side of my generally dodgy health is that I've been more careful with myself, and only had coronavirus once, in Summer 2022. I managed to escape it entirely in 2023, and didn't get any colds either. I'm eligible for continued vaccinations, which I've been having as they've become available, and I'm doing OK! One day I hope to put the pandemic journal aside, and keep a copy safe to show future generations, but unfortunately that day hasn't yet come.

Throughout 2023, I was working on various drafts of "Violins and Violets", a historical fiction (and historical romance) novel that I started writing in 2018. I kept on getting stuck within the first three chapters, getting "sidetracked" (or so I thought) by early plot points. My aim in 2023 was to redraft the novel to develop Katharina's character more before the inciting incident (when her father forbids her to compose, and burns all the work she's done so far), but I just couldn't get to that point. Originally, it was the beginning of Chapter One! In the outline I'd revised to make the new draft, it was Chapter Four, and I couldn't get past Chapter Three. There was just so much that I wanted to write about...

...but then I realised one day that I needed to make the events before the burning into a novel of their own, and "Violins and Violets" needed to become a series of three books! That "three book" idea quickly became a "five book" idea, and I started working on the first book that day.

The first draft of the first "Violins and Violets" book, which I started on 31st July, became my project for NaNoWriMo, and I'm pleased to say that I won with it! I then took the first 13 days of December to finish it off, and ended up with a complete draft of about 96,000 words. I started the sequel on 14th December, and got 18,000 words of that book down by midnight on 31st December. It's been a number of years since I've written so much so quickly, and I don't think I finished a single draft of any book in 2022. (Although maybe I finished off the longer version of "Vogeltje" early on? I'm not sure!)

I'm very excited to see what I can write in 2024, but I'm going to keep being kind to myself, and take it easy. No pressure to get anything done... but I'd really like to finish the sequel, and get the next book or two in the series drafted, too. I'd like to read more historical fiction, to develop my understanding of the genre, and if I can read some more histfic focused on music and art in particular, I'll be really pleased.

Month-by-Month Breakdown

November - 50,000+ words (won NaNoWriMo!)

January - 40,850 words

February - 37,150 words

December - 29,500 words

July - 24,125 words

March - 22,000 words

May - 18,000 words

October - 13,750 words

September - 12,750 words

August - 9,000 words

April - 8,750 words

June - 5,875 words

Total - 271,750 words

average 745 per day, 22,645 per month

(Sharp-eyed magpies amongst you may notice that I'm posting this on 17th January 2024, and you're right in thinking that's rather later in the month than I intended. It's for a very good, happy reason, though: I've been working on my sequel to "Ladies Don't Write Music" and so far in January I've added almost 32k to the manuscript, bringing me up to nearly 50k total!)

[saltine-kakyoin]

OH SHIT!!!! my clown ass never saw that u rb'd those ask posts, i was Looking at my notifs to see if u would so i could send u some but SOMEHOW I MISSED IT??? clown hours.... ANyways for the emoji one have 🤗💙💘🍀😇 and 👍 (tried to not do repeats from your ask 2 me cause they all apply anyways but, Regardless) and for the questions post, maybe 5, 11, 12, 17, 20, 23 and 25? ;__;/ ily so much and i hope u have a rlly lovely night!!! and that this coming week is kinder 2 u!!!! 💖💖💖💖

ahhh, it’s no worries!!! idk about you but for me, tumblr has been having the Time of Its LIFE lately wrt notifications and most disconcertingly, unfollowing people! D: so i completely get it, it’s no worries!!! ;w;/ i already know for a Fact i’m going to write so so much, so i’m gonna put this under a readmore >w< ruth 🤝 sarah respectful lesbian moments

edit: so I finished writing it and it’s Insanely Long- just in case you don’t make it to the bottom, thank you mein broth-er!!!! ; O; i hope you have a wonderful night too!! writing all of this out made me reminisce on some really nice times, and I’m having an a1 night! ^^ ilysm! it’ll probably be daytime when you read this, so i hope you have a great day! <3

🤗 given the chance I would gladly hug you

on god!!!! ;___; i think i would frfr dissolve if a got a Ruth-Certified hug, things have been so overwhelming lately

💙 you are my closest friend

the feeling is mutual!! <3 we don’t always get to talk often, but fhdhshg when we do we talk about like All of the Madness in Sarah’s Mind^tm, and you are so patient + tolerant of my incoherent ramblings which is something i don’t think i’ve ever fully experienced? anyhow, after a year (more than a year?) of having these kinds of convos and going through the general madness of life together, I totally agree ;w;

💘 I love you so much

i love you too!!! so so much!!! 💃🕺 i don’t think words will ever be able to express how much i love and appreciate you! 💜💛

🍀 i’m lucky to have met you

i know we talk about this often, but seriously i feel the same way! it’s a little crazy that we met, technically, because Joseph Joestar tm deserved more than to be a cheater... there is something hilarious about this wild friendship rooting from him!! of all jojos!! 🤢 but i’m so grateful that we met, it’s been such a wonderful ride ;w; <3

😇 you’re a sweet cinnamon bun

🥺🥺🥺🥺 bro i- fhdhghdhgh thank you!!! ;o;

👍 you are fun to be around

ahhh, thank you!!! i am glad you feel this way bc whoo boy, i think some other people would look at the madness i tell you about and go 👁️👁️ that’s a no for me, luvs. remember last year when i was losing it tryna prepare for ren faire + i cut my palm on that one glass bottle? bc a- i barely do and b- i feel like that moment encapsulates the nicki minaj roman holiday-ness of my life XD i’m really grateful you’ve stuck around through it all 🤗💕💖

now buckle in bro!!!! the essays are incoming!!!

5. Name a movie that makes you genuinely laugh.

i swear on my life the Mortal Kombat movie from 1995 is a national treasure, it is SUCH a solid movie and has so many funny moments. Robin Shou makes such a 🥺🥺 Liu Kang, and jesus fuck he can be so savage when the script calls for it!! there’s one part where he takes Johnny Cage’s luggage and straight up fucking chucks it into the ocean + then bullies him about it later! honestly the Ballad of Johnny Cage and His Luggage is one of my favorite parts from the movie <3 if you haven’t seen it + you like cheesy, old school movies, i really recommend it!!!

11. Describe the memory of the last time you felt true happiness.

So I can’t remember the last time I did, bc my memory is horrifically terrible + probably getting worse as time goes on?? but i will tell you about one of the more recent times I remember! :D There is one crucial expository note for this memory- my brother-in-law makes THE best chili in the entire world. my brother and I were trying to recreate it because it’s such a simple but delicious + filling meal- I think this was our first time trying to create it? and it was SO chaotic, the tomato sauce and stuff kept popping and burning me and we weren’t 100% certain that we’d gathered the right ratios for the ingredients and it was just. madness lmao. Chance’s chili is one that you leave alone for multiple hours at a time (I think this is the case for all chili but i don’t cook often enough to know ;__;), and we were kinda 👀👀👀 because we weren’t sure it’d turn out right? But it did!!!! I vividly remember when it was finished and we taste-tested it + went oOOH FUCK! it wasn’t quite the same as chance’s but ohhh my god it was so good 🥰🥰🥰 but yeah!! we ate it all up and I think this was around the time I started my playthrough of Esteban for Dragon Age 2? which was one of my favorite playthroughs for the entire franchise... he’s just a simple ig beard model mage ;w; i wanted to show you what he looked like in this post but the formatting went wonky so ig i’ll just post him separately?? it’s 1000% in-character for him to infiltrate my jojo blog 😔

12. Name a song that makes you feel ethereal.

hm...I’d say it’s between Forget About or Feet of Clay! They’re both such light and tenderhearted songs, and when I listen to them I feel like I’m in an apartment kitchen slow-dancing with a love, and it’s so dark except for the slowly rising sun. I don’t know if that feeling could be described as ethereal? but it’s close enough for me

17. What is something you own that is important to you? What makes it so important?

I have a small collection of scripts from the shows I’ve been in, and two of the most important ones are from the plays my high school put on during my sophomore and junior years, The Nit-Wits and The Musical Comedy Murders of 1940, respectively! The Nit-Wits has a ton of sentimental value to me because it was the last show I genuinely acted in, and it was a show we had to pull together in 2 or 3 weeks!! We were originally going to do a murder mystery play for the fall, but none of the cast was feeling it and it just wasn’t going to come to life in time (honestly this speaks volumes for how much we weren’t vibing with it, because all of our shows came together at like.. the final dress rehearsals if not opening night lmao). I vividly remember we took a vote during rehearsals about whether or not to switch the show, and then we did and it was SO fun + chaotic!! My character was one of the only regular characters in the show, but I think everyone else had a lot of fun acting as actors who were hired to be maniacal, and that made acting off of them so fun! I remember there was also a night my friend Adonis almost tore the entire set down because he ran through a door and tripped over a set brace in his haste!! The Nit-Wits is hugely important because it was a really fresh acting experience for me, and again, my last time genuinely on the stage and not behind the scenes!

MCM is important to me because it was the first play I ever stage managed! I’d stage managed our musical the spring prior, but that was a huge undertaking and involved many different people and moving parts. Stage managing a play, at least at my high school, was a calmer and more intimate experience, and one I really enjoyed! Another huge reason I treasure MCM’s script is because it is one of the last shows I had with my friend I told you about- he was a senior. I have little notes and doodles from the cast and crew scattered throughout my book for this show, and I remember being so irritated by this because it meant I was losing space for stage directions, cues, and notes. Now, I’m super grateful to have these scribbles- it’s one of the only things I have left of him. 

On that note, relating to him, MCM is also the show which birthed my most horrific theater horror story!! During one of the performances, I guess he forgot his line?? idk. But he ended up jumping six pages ahead of where the current scene was (I knew this bc I was following along in my book backstage + was frantically trying to figure out where he’d gone), which threw the entire cast, who were all tragically onstage, way off-track. This resulted in the most frightening game of script ping-pong I’ve ever seen: he’d skipped six pages ahead, so Adonis ended up saying a line from two pages after the six-page skip, and somehow someone else went!! oh I have a response to that line! And then said something like 9 pages back! I think the lead actress tried to ground everyone back to the lines they were supposed to be saying, but she ended up just saying a lot of their lines? And one of those lines that was supposed to be said by someone else was supposed to cue a black-out that someone got murdered in, but my lighting techie was SO fucking lost (we were both huddled over the script next to the breaker trying to figure out WHERE the hell we were! i think i had a flashlight in my mouth so I could flip through the book with both hands and thus faster??), so ofc the lights stayed up! I remember getting through this scene being the most painstaking endeavor of my entire life, but thankfully intermission was right after it! We actually extended intermission because the cast needed a hot second to fuckign RESET for Act 2 bc sweet jesus that was so bizarre...Needless to say, after that show we never messed that scene up again + everyone who acted in the show became super anal about knowing their lines as the years went on. The Six Page Skip became a legendary part of our hs theater Canon (like biblical canon ;w; although I don’t think anyone’s talked about it since my class graduated) alongside the times one of our ensemble dudes had to break through the roof of the girl’s dressing room to retrieve the keys to the theater + i got stuck on stage!

20. What’s the sweetest thing someone has done for you?

I really had to wrack my brain to answer this one, as I’m generally not the person people do things for, you know? This answer goes wayyy back, to 8th grade :O but so! there is mild exposition for this- when I started middle school, I lived in North Carolina, but we moved to Florida right before 7th grade bc my grandma is ill. We lived with my uncle while we were looking for a house, so I went to the local middle school bc why wouldn’t I? but in November, we finally found a house + my mom was like....So... are you going to switch schools or...I’d struck up some really solid friendships in this time, so i was like Mom I’d Rather Die OAO. So, we struck up a deal that I’d get to stay at that school on a zone waiver + that she’d drive me to school everyday. Sometime closer to the end of eighth grade she was like, yeah so.. I can’t do this for high school, it’s too much gas- which was valid! I was really sad about it, but I sucked it up.

Anyhow, fast forward to the last day of eighth grade, which was perhaps the saddest day I’d lived up until that point, mostly bc I knew I was probably never going to see all my friends again. My best friend, who I was like hardcore v close to + the person I shared all my wacky AUs and OC’s and headcanons with, was waiting with me for my mom to come pick me up, and then!!! When my mom pulled into the school she suddenly whipped out this lengthy letter she’d written to me about how much she enjoyed my friendship and how grateful she was that we were able to have lunch together (lunch was.. tragically ;__; the only time we really saw each other that year), and that she would never forget me! And she’d drawn me a ton of fanart from all the things I was obsessed with back then!! it was so much so fast, but then my mom was yelling at me to get in the car and I had to go :(

We kept in touch through email freshman year + fake-dated bc a senior was stalking me? ;J; and then we went to Megacon together! but I became really heavily involved in choir and theater after that, and we just kind of drifted apart :( we do follow each other on ig tho! It’s insane to think about her and that letter because on GOD ruth, that was a thinly veiled love letter and I never like... wrote her anything back that was as worthy as what she wrote me. But, she’s doing really well in uni now, so I guess it’s all okay? idk! ; o ;

23. What’s your zodiac sign? Do you think you fit the general characteristics of that sign?

I’m a Cancer!! and also a metal dragon by the Chinese Zodiac, which I’ve always thought was pretty sick! :3 I am 10000% your stereotypical Cancer, super emotional and introspective + often prone to tears ;u; My mom always said that dragons are steadfast and loyal people, and I think this also applies to me, to a fault. I checked around some websites to see what characteristics were often applied to metal dragons specifically, and it seems they are pretty strong-willed, ambitious, and generous? I don’t know if you could call me strong-willed or ambitious, but it’s all good ig.

25. What’s a song that gives off good vibes anytime you listen to it?

Ohh man, I went in on this question for Shannon, but bc I was digging around my library for Jules, I actually found an old fave! This song is from one of my all-time favorite musicals, Once on This Island- it’s The Human Heart! This song is so sweet, and god between the writing for the orchestra + the writing for the ensemble, this song is a straight masterpiece <3 I love love love the line, “Through your love you’ll live forever”, and although I am Hardcore Terrified of getting a tattoo, I really want that line tattooed on my body. if you have time, I recommend giving Once on This Island a listen!! I’ve never heard a show that uses its instruments and singers the way OoTI does (and holy FUCK it is so breathtaking live!!! I got to see it on Broadway and bro.... 🥺🥺 it was transcendental..)

[moonbeamsung]

have you shipped your moots yet w nct? if not would you give it a try? only if you’re up to it!

hello anon! thanks for popping into my inbox and sending this, i really appreciate it!🥺technically i have, but i’ve made quite a few new moots since last time so i’d love to do it again! (i’m sorry if you’re not on here, it’s only because i don’t know you quite well enough to pair you with someone!!)

i’ll split this up into two parts since i got a second anon ask only 4 minutes after this one (kinda spooky😳) for the same thing (which also works quite well because of mention limits, heh)! you can find part two here.

part one: taeil-mark

taeil: @ferie-anon | @neonun-au | @ta3ilmoon 

↳ i associate these three with a lot of wisdom, talent, and passion about the things they enjoy! also, they always have a kind word to say and are really cheerful and enjoyable to speak with, so i’d ship ferie, mads and grace with taeil!

johnny: @suhpressed | @jaeminscoffee | @1-800-seo 

↳ in a way, i kind of see them as older siblings to me if that makes any sense...however brief our interactions may be, i often find myself looking up to them a lot and thinking about the gift of their friendship and encouragement when i need it most. johnny really reminds me of a comforting older brother, hence why i ship ella, lyra and jess with him!!

taeyong: @tyongxnct | @puppywritings 

↳ elida and william are both so so super sweet, and i can tell they take great pride in their work and talents!! just like taeyong, they’re very friendly and so compassionate towards everyone they know!

yuta: @sly-merlin | @starlightsooyoungs 

↳ i’d ship yuta with simmi and hui because i see them as very bright and healing people. i think that their personalities draw you to them and make you want to get to know them more, like yuta’s! even if we don’t talk all the time, they both definitely have the power to put a smile on my face!

kun: @daybreakx | @jenojam | @fullsuhnny 

↳ ale, vina and angie would pair well with kun! they all have very comforting, caring presences, & it’s easy to see how much they look out for and want to help those around them!! they might seem a little bit on the shy side at times, but once you get to know them they’re really so friendly!

doyoung: @danishmiilk | @doiedreams 

↳ xingyi and kay are both good people to lean on when i need someone to talk to. they’re also really reliable and i feel like i can depend on them whenever for a bit of reassurance or kindness, because they truly have a whole lot of it to offer! i feel really cared for talking to them, just like how doyoung is an especially caring person.

ten: @du0tine | @lebrookestore 

↳ their personalities are really distinct to me, very energetic, fun and adventurous people. it feels like you’ve known them for years and they’re very easy to get along with! they put so much thought into their works and are really confident and proud of them, and lots of people admire them for that. all those things remind me of ten so i’d ship solange and brooke with him!!

jaehyun: @ethaeriyeol | @byunbaekby 

↳ i look up to bea and aurora a lot, even if we haven’t known each other for the longest time. from what i’ve seen they’re really calm and organized, and have a gift with words and advice. from reading and hearing about their writing i can also tell they’re really talented and motivated, and very warm to interact with whenever we do! i guess those things make jaehyun come to mind so i’d ship them with him!

winwin: @orange-nimon-cross | @pretty-junjun 

↳ yunha and nathalie come off as more reserved to me but still care so much for their friends, they’re both always really supportive of others and me when i’ve needed it. also they’re such down-to-earth and humble people, being able to call myself a friend of theirs is a really special thing and i value their sweet personalities. i can tell they both have a lot of passion for writing and they should be very proud of their talents!! sicheng is a very kindhearted and dedicated soul so that explains the pairing!

jungwoo: @yo-ddream | @quokkacore

↳ they’re really sincere and understanding towards me and everyone, i can count on them for the gentleness and thoughtfulness they possess so much of. yo-ddream and helena are just so sweet and i think they have a talent for brightening someone’s day, with either humor or just a nice message and i really appreciate that. at least through tumblr they seem pretty affectionate with others, and for all these reasons i’d ship them both with jungwoo!

lucas: @badwithten | @hannie-dul-set 

↳ i think i’ve used this phrase before but lucas’s personality is a mixture of humor and heart, which applies to both zoe and allexandra! even if we aren’t super close i care for them so much and it seems like everyone just adores them. like him, they also seem fairly outgoing and sociable!!

mark: @ru-lin | @rueyins | @nakamotocore | @laruan 

↳ i get very lovable vibes like mark for these four! they make me laugh and smile so much with their humor and wit, even if it’s a tiny bit dorky (in only the best and cutest possible way)! they’re also so generous and kind like him as well, so i’d ship ruth, rue, ie and moon with mark for sure.

as soon as i start to describe my friends, my vocabulary seems to shrink by like 90% so i basically just end up saying that everyone’s kind and friendly and comforting, which is true!! but i’m sorry for the somewhat unintelligent explanations >< i love you all very much and still can’t believe i’ve made such wonderful and amazing friends on this site!!🤍

[esperantoauthor]

Pandemic Mental Health Check-In

Thanks for starting this check-in, @snarkyhag. Thanks to @20xbetterthanu, @gleefulpoppet, and @gorgxoxus for tagging me 💕 

I actually started filling this out right when you all were tagging me but, uh, it was honestly getting me down so I put it aside. So, I know I post ranty things on here sometimes but I mostly try to keep this a happy and upbeat place, because that is how I like it! But this got kind of real when I was filling it out so I’m going to stick it under a cut in case you just want to keep the happy tumblr vibes going and scroll on past.

How is everyone holding up?  

On the one hand, I feel like I have adapted to the situation and found my “new normal.” On the other hand, I have become a complete hermit, my job is way less enjoyable, I have now postponed my wedding twice, and none of this has been good for my mental health. I’m trying to live one day at a time and when I focus on that, I do alright...when I take a step back and think about things big picture it can all start to seem pretty grim. 

At the beginning of the pandemic, I was much more concerned about protecting those around me than getting sick myself. After seeing a friend my age be sick for months (she has been sick since April and still has not recovered) and finally get classified with “long-haul covid” and reading the multitude of articles about young healthy people ending up with long-term health complications after recovering from covid including mild cognitive impairment (it sounds cuter when they just say “foggy brain” but that is what that means i take it very seriously) I am now genuinely afraid for myself as well as others.

Then we have the political situations in the U.S. right now which has just been one devastating news story after another.

What are you doing to keep healthy?

Other than following the pandemic precautions, honestly not much. My job switched from being one where I was on my feet all day to a desk job and the only structured exercise I had (Pilates at the gym twice a week with a friend) isn’t available. I lack the willpower/motivation/know-how to get an at-home exercise routine going. Living in an apartment without much open floorspace definitely doesn’t help; I don’t even really have room to exercise freely on a yoga mat let alone set-up a stationary bike or something. We live in the a big city so going for walks is unappealing because there are people everywhere which means being vigilant and general covid anxiety. I guess we eat healthy-ish...it's not amazing but we do okay. I’m more focused on my mental health than my physical health right now, I guess. I’m taking my meds, having virtual visits with my therapist, and using my strategies.

Are you working, not working, working from home?

I am working from home, thanks to my request for work accommodations being approved (thank you ADA!). Our school closed (originally for one week) in late March and then never reopened so I have been working from home since then with very little time off. I worked part-time in the summer mostly because I knew that with quarantine in place it would be bad for my mental health to have no built-in structure and just sit at home all day. I didn’t realize that applying for disability accommodations to work from home was something I would qualify for (I got the impression it was only if you had a medical condition that made you more susceptible to covid-19 not for mental health conditions that are exacerbated by covid-19). Thankfully, it turned out that it WAS an option and I got it approved before students started school. Figuring out how to do “parallel” instruction (teaching to in-person and remote students at the same time) has been a big learning curve and I haven’t had to do a formal evaluation over zoom yet, but I’m figuring things out. If I hadn’t been approved to work from home I honestly think I would have quit. 

Anyone caring for kids or elders?

Thankfully, no. It’s just me, my fiance (who is healthy), and my tortoise. Sometimes I help out my brother by keeping my nephew occupied on facetime so he can have a work meeting or something.

What was you best/worst day?

My worst day was the day after George Floyd’s murder. I was obviously very upset and sad about what happened, but it also became the trigger point for me finally processing all of my grief about the multitude of death cause by the pandemic as a whole. Work was basically me zooming with kids and then sobbing during my prep time. I cried pretty much the whole day. I think because I was so focused on figuring out how to do remote teaching and just the day-to-day challenges, I hadn’t really had a moment to just fully mourn how many people had been and were dying. And then this amongst all of that, when people were fighting for their lives on ventilators, we had this completely senseless and avoidable death and it kind of pushed me over the edge. 

What inspires you?

People inspire me. People with their big hearts and their big ideas. People saving lives in our hospitals and desperately searching for treatments in their labs. People taking to the streets and fighting for their rights. Anyone who is fighting for a better tomorrow inspires me.

Are you taking up hobbies?

I started a needlepoint of Ruth Bader Ginsburg. I should really finish that. Does making tumblr memes and oven charts count as a hobby?

What kind of content helps keep the joy on your dash?

Cute Klaine/Glee shit! Hilarious shitposting! People liveblogging my fic on tumblr ( 👀 @20xbetterthanu)! Watching @spookyklaine‘s reactions to my oven charts. @kurthummeldeservesbetter‘s lovely blog awards because they were just so positive!

Has life gone back to “normal” where you are

NOPE! Thankfully the Illinois governor takes the pandemic seriously so while things have started to open up a bit, it is definitely not normal. We are the level where some people are eating outdoors at restaurants. Me and my fiance are personally still in full quarantine mode where we do not leave the apartment except for essential items like groceries. We have done a handful of socially distanced hangouts where we sit six feet from our friends in their backyard and drink the stuff we brought with us. Also just today, I saw on the news that Chicago is getting additional covid-19 mitigations because the numbers are spiking again.

What are you doing for fun?

Well I made a tumblr, so that happened! Writing and reading fic, doing gleewatch, playing stardew valley, watching TV with my fiance. 

My big “fun” thing is that I started a weekly trivia game played over zoom with IRL friends that has been running since April or May. We started out with trivia videos a comedian I like made and now we make our own questions. I didn’t even really like trivia before this but it has become a very fun thing and my main social interaction that isn’t work or on the internet. We laugh a lot and it is a good time!

[freddiesaysalright]

Beautiful Mess Epilogue

A Brian May x Reader Fic

Summary: Reader works in a bookshop. She meets Brian May and they have an instant connection. It seems to be a fairy tale romance. But, things are seldom what they seem.

Word Count: 1k

Tag List: @psychosupernatural​, @someone-get-a-medic​, @bensrhapsody​, @deakyclicks, @crazylittlethingcalledobsession​, @minigranger​, @crazyweirdocalledfriday​, @mrs-jack-murphy​, @not-john-watsons-blog​, @simmisblog​, @mirkwoodshewolf​, @assembledherethevolunteers​, @thosequeenboys​, @lv7867​, @maymacca​, @rethought​, @brianslittlepet​, @jinxy93​, @stephydearestxo​, @mrcleanisthicc​, @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls​, @readinghorn​, @lookuptotheskiesandsee​, @reedusteinrambles​, @borhapqueen92​, @1204-moonchild, @bohemiansweede​

A/N: The epilogue! Just for a little sweetness to wrap up this very dramatic story, lol. Thanks to all of you who read and loved this one. As usual, I had a great time writing it and look forward to writing even more for you guys :D

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11

Epilogue here we go!!!

“This is taking forever,” Roger complained, crossing his arms over his chest.

“I told you it was too early to come to the hospital,” John returned. 

The little girl in his lap turned to face him.

“Did I take this long, Uncle John?” she wondered.

He smiled at her, poking her nose with his finger to make her giggle.

“Longer,” he said.

“Was Uncle Roger this grouchy?” she asked.

He laughed. “Grouchier.”

“Oi, don’t turn that girl against me,” Roger snapped at John. He turned to her. “I was absolutely thrilled when you got here, Melanie May.”

“I believe you,” she assured him with a smile.

“You should know how long it takes, Rog, you’ve got kids,” John reminded him.

“Yeah, but it’s different when you’re in there where everything is happening,” Roger replied. “There’s nothing to do out here.”

John rolled his eyes and looked back at Melanie.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go and stay with Auntie Veronica?” he offered. “Uncle Roger is right, there’s not much to do here.”

She shook her head.

“No way,” she said firmly. “I want to be right here when my little brother comes.”

“You’re a good sister,” he praised, stroking her hair.

Melanie had inherited her father’s messy, dark curls. They were near impossible for Brian to maintain, but on a three year old, they proved even more so. Lately, you both had basically given up trying to tame them at all. John turned out to be excellent at styling hair and he had somehow managed to get it all into one plait down her back. It was perfect for today, since she was mostly reading or coloring to occupy her time.

“Are we late?” Freddie wondered as he and Jim entered the waiting room.

“Haven’t missed a damn thing,” Roger assured him.

“Oh, good,” Freddie said.

“Uncle Fred!” Melanie cried, scrambling off of John’s lap.

She trotted over to Freddie, who scooped her up and kissed her cheek sweetly.

“How are you, lovie?” he asked. “Ready to be a big sister?”

“Mhm!” she said with glad nod. “I’ve already colored three pictures for him. Wanna see?”

“Always,” he agreed.

He set her down and followed her over to the coffee table where her little drawings were. Jim greeted Roger and John as he took a seat beside the latter. Freddie gushed over Melanie’s artwork, and she beamed at his praise.

“Have you seen Brian and Y/N?” Jim asked.

“We saw them briefly right when we got here,” Roger answered. “But she was tired, so we let her rest.”

“Understandable,” Jim said. “How long has the labor been going on?”

“About thirteen hours now,” John said. “Brian brought Melanie to mine around midnight last night on their way here. We’ve only been here since this morning.”

“Good lord, thirteen hours, really?” Freddie sighed, looking over at them. “Is everything okay?”

“Think so,” Roger said. “No one’s told us otherwise.”

Melanie glanced at each of their faces. Her own started to fall.

“Is Mummy gonna be okay?” she wondered, her voice small.

“Oh, of course she is, darling,” Freddie assured her.

He picked her up, sat beside Roger, and placed her in his lap.

“Uncle Fred’s right, love,” Roger added. “Mums are made to do this. It’s what makes them mums.”

“And if anything happens, your dad and all these doctors and nurses are right there to help her,” John said. 

She sighed with relief. “Okay, good.”

“Where are your grandparents?” Roger wondered suddenly.

“Grandma Susan and Grandpa Charlie are in Paris,” Melanie told him. 

“Ruth and Harold are ill,” John explained. “Brian said he’ll bring the baby to them when they’re feeling better.”

“Ah, well, hope you’re okay with just your uncles, darling girl,” Roger said to Melanie.

“Always,” she returned.

Freddie released her so she could go and color again. All four of them watched her, humming to herself as she went. Roger got to his feet and stretched, rolling his sore shoulders.

“Fuck it, I’m coloring,” he announced, and he sat cross-legged beside Melanie.

“Here, Uncle Roger!” she said happily, handing him some paper and a crayon.

“Thanks, sweets,” he said. “What’chya humming there?”

“Radio GaGa,” she answered, swirling a purple line across the page.

Roger smirked. “I am so rubbing that in Brian’s face.”

“Oh yeah?” John challenged. “Mel, what’s your favorite song from Daddy’s band?”

“Bites the Dust!” she cried.

John raised his eyebrows and smirked at Roger, who frowned.

“Alright, Deaky, you made your point,” Freddie said through a giggle. He stood up. “I’m with Rog, might as well color to do something.”

“You’ve barely been here five minutes,” John pointed out.

“So what?” Freddie returned. “I can color if I want.”

He took a seat across from the other two. John and Jim looked at one another, shrugged, and then joined the party on the floor.

“What’s your picture of?” Jim asked Melanie.

“It’s a galaxy,” she said. “This one’s for Daddy.”

“You gonna draw one for Mummy too?” Freddie asked.

“Of course!” she said. “But all of you have to draw something for the baby. I’ve already done mine, so you’re all very behind.”

They all chuckled and got to work. Melanie made the waiting a lot more fun.

Brian walked wearily down the corridor to the waiting area. His heart was so full as his spirit soared. His son was here. He had a son. You had made it through the delivery perfectly and were now resting while the lactation specialist talked to you briefly about breastfeeding. Since you’d already had one baby, it wouldn’t take long, so Brian took that opportunity to tell his friends the good news.

He saw them all hunched over a coffee table with Melanie, coloring. He couldn’t hold back his laughter. His daughter whipped around at the sound. Her face lit up when she saw him.

“Daddy!” she cried, and came hurtling over to him.

He scooped her up and held her close.

“Hi, darling,” he said.

“Is he here?” she wondered.

His bandmates and Jim caught up.

“Yeah, is he here?” Roger repeated.

“He’s here,” Brian said. “Y/N is fine, the baby’s fine. It’s all fine.”

“Can we see him?” Freddie asked.

“Yep,” Brian answered. “Come with me.”

“Oh, the pictures!” Melanie protested.

“On it,” said Roger, and he jogged back to the table to collect them.

When everyone was ready, they followed Brian back toward your room.

“What name have you given him?” Jim asked.

Brian smiled. “His name is Richard.”

[yournewapartment]

Hiatus Announcement / Game Show Podcast

LISTEN NOW

On Episode 41, Mac hosts a game show! Mac quizzes guests Maddie, Nova, and Naomi on an episode originally released as a bonus Patreon episode. There is light cursing throughout the episode that may not be suitable for all listeners. Your New Apartment the Podcast is going on Hiatus until October 2019.

Episode Links:

Your New Apartment on Patreon

Your New Apartment on Ko-Fi

Your New Apartment on Society6

Your New Apartment on Instagram

Maddie's blog Adult Talk

Nova's blog Positively-LGBTQ

Naomi's blog Matte Glitter

Naomi's Instagram

Contact us: askyournewapartment@gmail.com Intro, outro, and transitional musical loops by Natalie Ice. Find her album "Hungover/Spiritual" on all your favorite streaming services. Natalia's Website. Natalia's Insta.

Hey podcast listeners, Mac here, with a little announcement. First off- last week I released episode forty of my podcast. Which, is crazy. Because a few months ago I didn’t even have a podcast, and now I have forty episodes of a podcast.

I am so grateful to everyone who has listened to the podcast, left reviews on iTunes, and supported me on Patreon and Kofi. I am so incredibly moved to see that people out there are actually listening to my little podcast, real people, not just my mom! I wanted to take a moment to thank all of you for your incredible support, it means the world to me.

As some of you may know, I’m getting married in a few weeks (yay). Because of my wedding, Your New Apartment the podcast is going on hiatus until October. The podcast is something I write, edit, and produce all by myself. It takes an incredible amount of time and energy to finish even an hour long episode, and I’m concerned that between the wedding planning and other life stuff, I won’t be able to give the podcast the attention it needs.

However- I have some exciting episodes coming your way after the break, including episodes on house buying, insurance, the Bitches Get Riches episode, and Confessions of A Former Goth Part 2. I’m also always looking for new topics to cover and guests to speak to, so if you have any suggestions, please contact me at askyournewapartment@gmail.com

I wanted to take a minute to do a special shoutout to all my Patreon supporters. They have helped me pay all of my podcast hosting fees, as well as my Adobe Audition fee, which is the application I use to edit each podcast. They also helped me purchase in full- headphones, a Blue Yeti Microphone, and a pop filter for said microphone. Thanks to my mom, my Bubbie, Lissa, Ruth, Elise, Dianna, Svenja, Naomi and the lovely ladies at Bitches Get Riches. Thank you to past Patreon donors as well, I know committing to a monthly payment can be tough, and I appreciate everything you were able to give me.

I also recently had some incredibly generous Kofi donors, which helped me purchase Kofi Gold for a year. Starting in October, I will be accepting Kofi Commissions for Adulting-related posts and questions. A huge thanks to Mars and two other anonymous donors for helping me purchase Kofi Gold.

With all this incredible help, I feel so selfish asking for more, but it’s the nature of podcasting. As it is, I am making $0 in profit from this podcast. Which is fine, my patrons are covering all of my monthly expenses, and I’m so incredibly grateful for that. In my travels in podcast editing, I’ve discovered several more tools that I’d like to purchase that would greatly increase my ability to record in a higher definition. Recording in higher definition means that editing each podcast would be a hundred times easier, as well as cutting down my editing time by a significant amount.

I use Zencastr to record remotely with people, and it's a great software. I am currently using their free plan, which has limited recording quality and storage space options. Zencastr Pro would be an addition $20 a month! If I get 20 new $1/month patroons or two very generous $10/month patrons, I will be able to purchase Zencastr Pro. 90% of my interviews are done remotely, so upgrading would make  a HUGE difference for me! $1/month gets you early access to podcasts as well a vote on podcast/blog content. $10/month gets you both those things, and two additional very special YNA podcasts each month. Go to Patreon.com/yournewapartment for more info.

If you’re unable to give monthly, but would like to make a one-time donation, you can buy me a coffee on Kofi. All proceeds from Kofi are going towards paying off my Kofi Gold one-year subscription! After that, I will use the proceeds to pay for soundproofing for my home for better recording quality. Go to ko-fi.com/yournewapartment

My future goals for the podcast are purchasing an incredibly expensive piece of equipment that will allow me to record phone calls in high definition audio, as well as being able to pay to transcribe every single episode of the podcast for hard of hearing listeners. This is a request I get a lot, but it costs SO MUCH money, I really cannot afford to do it that often. Which sucks. Because I want to be more accessible. If you want to make a donation towards transcribing a specific episode through Ko-fi, let me know, and I will put your money towards transcription (usually costs about $6/episode).

If you can’t afford to support me in a financial way, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE rate and review YNA on iTunes! The more reviews I get, the higher my SEO ranking! And hopefully one day, I can even get some sponsors.

I know I’ve mentioned her a lot lately, because I am completely obsessed with her music, but once again, big shoutout to Natalia Ice. Natalia graciously allowed me to use music from her album “Hungover/Spiritual” as my transition music. You can find her music on all of your favorite streaming platforms. You can buy her music on Bandcamp and buy some awesome merch at her website nataliaice.com. Check out her episode of YNA the podcast if you haven’t already! She is one of the coolest people I’ve ever spoken to.

Finally, I wanted to give a big shoutout to all of my lovely guests who offered me their time for free, many of whom appeared on the podcast multiple times. It was so much fun getting to know all of you, and thank you for supporting the podcast.

Listeners- if there was a particular guest you enjoyed hearing, please let me know! Many guests come on this podcast thinking that everyone is going to hate them and that nobody is going to care about their episode, despite how many times I tell them that they’re amazing. I love sharing specific feedback from listeners, and it may even help me encourage some guests to make a second appearance on the show! So again, if you loved a particular episode, let me know.

And lastly, before I go, I wanted to a share a very special podcast episode with you, as a thank you for all of your support. This episode is a Patreon-exclusive episode that I released back in May. This episode really has nothing to do with adulting, but it was so much fun to record, and I did hands down the most amount of research on this episode that I’ve ever done for the podcast.  It was HOURS upon HOURS of research! So you better stick around and listen to the whole thing! There is cursing throughout this episode, so if that’s not your thing, please skip the episode. A huge thank you to Maddie, Nova, and Naomi for recording this episode with me, I hope to do a rematch sometime soon. I will link their respective blogs for everyone to check out and support, and they’ve all appeared on YNA the podcast before, so listen to those episodes as well.

Don’t forget to check out my backlog of 40 episodes! There may be one you missed, and they’re all worth listening to. Follow YNA on Tumblr and Instagram, and check out the episode page for any and all links mentioned in this preview. Enjoy.

[roseskiesandbutterflies]

Killer Queen - Chapter 12: Thank God It’s Christmas

Summary: Life is easy when things go your way. I know this from experience. I also know that that can disappear in an instant and that you have to be able to rely on your friends. Luckily my name is Arabella Ruth White and I’m the fifth marauder. But I want to show you the girl behind the mask. It takes a lot of work to be this fabulous, darling. (This story is also on Wattpad and AO3 of the same name.)

A/N: So hello again! I know it’s been 3 months since I last updated this fic, and a lot has changed since August so let me catch you up real quick. First of all, in the UK we basically came out of lockdown only to go back into it last week so that’s great. I’m in Year 11 now which is the last year of high school if you didn’t know, and I’m in the middle of my mocks right now, so my free time has plummeted. This unfortunately means that updates across all of my fics will be much slower for the foreseeable future, or at least until Bojo finally cancels our exams. We can but hope.

I hope you enjoy this chapter! Sorry it’s kind of a filler but I promise that the plot is properly about to kick in, just like I said a couple chapters ago. I’ve realised that I’m now the same age as these characters which makes things a lot easier in terms of writing them realistically. Also I’ve decided that all of the characters and just this whole fic in general has main character energy which is Good. We love to see it. Anyways I shall see you next time! Hasta luego.

Warning(s): swearing

Word Count: 3.1k+

Inspiration: random headcanons I found on Tumblr and Pinterest, The Boy Who Killed God by SeraMGrigori on AO3, All The Young Dudes by MsKingBean89 on AO3, Sweet Things by Cocomouse on AO3

Taglist: @bhmay @briarrose26

Ask/comment to be on my taglist! Let me know if it’s for a specific fandom(s). Full list is in my bio.

Ruth had her face pressed right up to the glass of the tiny kitchen window, making it smear up from her breath, but she couldn’t find it in herself to care. She curiously watched her cat, Sooty, cautiously interact with the much larger cat from down the road, circling each other in a manner that would be rather ominous if the former wasn’t a quarter of the latter’s size. Sooty was almost completely obscured by the overgrown grass that was screaming to be cut; Ruth wouldn’t have even known he was outside if it wasn’t for his extraordinarily long tail poking through.

“Ruth, why are you sitting on my poor washing machine?” her mother came in, half amused, half concerned, “You’re going to break the damn thing.”

She gasped in mock offence and turned round to look at her, “Are you trying to say something, Mum?”

She gave her a knowing look and said, “You know that’s not what I meant. Now, you didn’t answer my question, what on earth are you doing on my washing machine?”

She jumped off before Jocelyn could chastise her any further, “I’m waiting for the boys. We were saying about going down the pier or something today so we could give each other our presents, and I’m waiting for James’s parents to apparate them all to our garden. And they’re taking forever,” she pouted, elongating the last word way more than necessary.

“Well, what time did you tell them to come round?”

Ruth thought about it for a second before saying, “Around one o’clock, I think.”

She raised an eyebrow, “And what time is it now?”

She looked at the ground and mumbled, “Half twelve.”

“Well, there you go. You have half an hour, and you haven’t even got dressed yet,” she pointed out.

“But-”

“No buts. You’re not going out in your dressing gown so go and get dressed,” she said, playfully swatting Ruth with the tea towel and chasing her out of the kitchen.

She laughed maniacally as she ran out of the room, “But Mother, I am dressed,” she said, taking off her dressing gown like a stripper.

“Then why are you wearing your dressing gown?” Jocelyn asked exasperatedly.

“Because it’s bloody cold!” Ruth grinned.

“Language,” she muttered, shaking her head with a smile but sobering up when she noticed Ruth’s face fall, “What’s up with you?”

She faltered for a moment, caught off guard by Jocelyn’s quick observations, “Mum, did you, erm, did you hear about Melanie?” she grimaced with the fear of treading grounds such as those. Her cousin hadn’t mentioned anything about who she had told about the pregnancy, so for all Ruth knew, Jocelyn didn’t have a clue and she was about to get Melanie into some serious trouble.

Luckily for them both, Jocelyn’s face softened with understanding, “I heard. Your aunt told me all about it a couple weeks ago.”

“What do you think about it all? I mean, Christ, Mum, she’s only seventeen,” Ruth sighed, running a hand across her hair with an anxiety that she hadn’t even realised she had been suppressing.

“Come here,” she said, taking Ruth into her arms and holding her for a moment, “She’s going to be okay. She’s not alone, remember that. She’s got your aunt and us and that boyfriend of hers. She’ll be fine.”

A sudden knock at the window followed by four familiar faces made both Ruth and her mum look up in surprise, followed by a disappointed laugh from the former when she noticed that Sirius was only wearing his signature leather jacket, with no hat, scarf or gloves. She opened the kitchen door to let them in, hugging each of them as they entered.

Jocelyn smiled at the group before winking at her daughter, “I’ll make myself busy, then. Have fun today,” she said as she left with her steaming cup of tea.

Ruth grinned before turning to the boys, “Sirius, darling, it’s December, not June. Where the hell is your coat? And don’t tell me you’re too cool to actually keep yourself warm,” she added before the boy in question could say anything.

“Leave it, Ruth, I’ve been trying to talk some sense into him all morning, he won’t listen,” James sighed dramatically, sounding scarily like an exhausted mother.

“I won’t listen? You’re the one who nearly strangled me with that damn scarf!” Sirius exclaimed, looking desperately to the others for back-up, only to be met with shrugs.

“You dress appropriately for the weather, or you face the consequences,” James deadpanned, before bursting into laughter from the miffed expression on Sirius’s face.

“God, you really have become your mum, haven’t you?” Peter smirked, holding back his own laughter.

“Shut up, Pete!” he whined, stomping on the ground petulantly.

“Now you’re my brother,” Ruth snorted.

*************

The fresh air bit at their noses as they made their way down the bustling high street, bracing themselves against the crisp December wind. Sirius was still the only one not wearing a coat, the rest of the group bundled up in their Gryffindor scarves which may or may not have been the only scarves they owned. Except for fifteen-year-old-grandmother Remus, who absolutely had a worrying obsession with anything you could make via knitting and the like. Peter had been positively swallowed up, and between his hat that looked about two sizes too big and his scarf, you could only see his eyes and the top of his nose.

“It’s a bit nippy out here, lads,” Ruth said, just as an icy gust of wind hit them, bringing tears to eyes, and actually making Peter stumble a little bit. As Jocelyn said at every possible opportunity, the wind was always stronger at the seaside.

“Is it really, Ruth? Gosh, I hadn’t noticed, thank you for telling me,” Remus glared at her, which would have been tenfold more menacing if half of his face wasn’t concealed by windswept hair.

“You are most welcome, dear Remus,” she grinned, sticking her tongue out at him in defiance.

“Children. Actual children,” Sirius muttered in a tone not at all dissimilar to that of an exasperated father.

“Says the one who refused to put his scarf on because he’s a stubborn bastard,” James said pointedly.

“Oh, you’re still going on about that one?”

“Always, my dear boy, always. I’m already making sure my best man’s speech mentions it at least twice,” he said proudly.

“He’s gotta find someone to marry first,” Peter pointed out, voice muffled from under his scarf.

“And what’s that supposed to meant, Pete?” Sirius rounded on him, forgetting completely about James’s strange obsession with his lack of winter clothing.

“Well, I don’t know but it might have something to do with the fact that you’ve never had a girlfriend for longer than three weeks,” Ruth shrugged.

“Oh, that’s rich coming from you, Ruth,” Remus laughed, “But she does have a point, Sirius.”

“Why are you all ganging up on me, it’s very rude,” he huffed, “Anyway, it’s not my fault that I want to win the bet me and Ruth started in third year.”

“Darling, you’ve always had the option to pull out and admit that I am proud to be the biggest hoe that Hogwarts has ever seen,” she said with as much faux innocence as one can muster while talking about sex.

Sirius was silent for a moment before pointing out, “Wait, hang on, I’ve had a girlfriend for longer than three weeks. I went out with Emmeline Vance for about five months!”

“You mean you were on again, off again with Emmeline Vance for about five months,” Remus raised an eyebrow.

“You’re both gonna end up clapped as anything by the time we leave,” Peter mumbled as they walked through the threshold of their destination: Ruth’s beloved record shop.

Cromer’s one and only record shop was a favourite haunt of Ruth’s. If anyone wanted to find her during the school holidays, the record shop would be the first place they would go to, the second being the arcade on the promenade because they have the best games darling, and the third being the beach. It never seemed to cross anyone’s mind to look for her at her own home; it was a generally unspoken rule of sorts in the town that seeing Ruth at her house was as rare as seeing a double rainbow. It was the place where a good part of her pocket money went to, and the owner was incredibly grateful to have such a loyal customer. Ruth just told him to consider himself lucky that his was the only establishment in walking distance of her house that supplied her with her vinyl obsession. And oh boy, did he do just that. The White family were responsible for a good twenty per cent of his sales.

They filed into the shop, instantly taking off their hats when the somewhat aggressive heat hit them. The limited daylight spilt in through the floor-length windows that flanked the door, highlighting the records on show. The shop itself was rather small, with only two aisles running straight down to the till. They were separated by cases upon cases of albums, packed like sardines into their crates and sorted semi-alphabetically. Posters adorned almost every available space on the otherwise dull walls, looking over the customers with a keen interest. Underneath them were further crates, these ones pushed back against the walls and full of singles, which were ordered even more haphazardly than the albums if you could believe that. Ruth made her way down one of the aisles, leaving the boys to browse artists that they barely even knew. At the back end of the shop sat the counter, behind which sat the owner, Steve.

Steve was a rather short and stout man who had the grave misfortune of looking around a whole decade older than he actually was. That was more so to do with the way with which he held himself, and the fact that he wore those glasses that had a chain attached that you only see on elderly men, than his physical appearance. He had a terribly receding hairline that seemed to creep back every time Ruth came into his shop. She reckoned that he’d be completely bald by the time she left Hogwarts for good. He always seemed to wear the same attire, consisting of loose-fitting trousers and a grey t-shirt that always had a stain that Ruth would rather not enquire after. His fingers were coated with a nicotine stain that you only get after smoking for a good few decades, teeth and fingernails tinted yellow.

His smile was warm, and his eyes lit up like a match when he noticed Ruth walking up to the counter, “Arabella, good to see you!”

“You too, Steve, how’s everything been these past couple of months?” she asked, leaning on the counter with her elbows.

“Not bad, not bad,” he said, “A lot better than this time last year, that’s for sure. Thanks, by the way, for the advert in the newspaper suggestion. Business has gone up a great deal since then.”

“Well, I couldn’t let you give up the shop that easily, could I? Nah, you’ve supplied me with the very best music these past few years, it was the least I could do,” she beamed.

He smiled gratefully at her before glancing at the boys behind her, leafing through bands they’d never even heard of for the most part, “I see you’ve brought your mates at last.”

Ruth snorted as they all poked their heads up and waved at the same time, each one oblivious to the other, “Yeah, I thought I might as well, I’ve been putting it off for too long.”

“One of them your boyfriend?” he winked, laughing at Ruth’s mortified expression.

“No! God, no, that’s a horrible thought,” she shivered, recoiling in disgust.

“What’s a horrible thought?” Sirius asked as he sauntered up to the counter.

“Your face,” Ruth muttered as he swatted her shoulder, mouth agape in shock.

“How rude! I can’t believe you would say something like that!” he gasped before turning around and whining, “James! Ruth’s being mean to me!”

It was then James’s turn to gasp in disappointment, “Is she? Oh, come here, I’ll protect you from the meanie,” he said in the most motherly voice he could muster, opening his arms and hugging Sirius while glaring at Ruth.

She stared at them in disbelief, looking at Remus and Peter for guidance, only to be met with shrugs. She resolved to simply shaking her head in exasperation and turning to the ‘new releases’ section of the shop.

*************

“You know what we should do,” Ruth said, holding up a chip to emphasise her point, “We should go on a gang holiday when we’re older. Just go travelling for a couple of weeks or something.”

They were currently sitting on the beach which, as you can probably imagine, isn’t the most pleasant of experiences in the middle of winter. The harsh wind nipped at their faces and Peter’s nose was crimson with the cold, but they found themselves sitting there anyway, watching the teal waves advance and retreat under the December mist that lazily rested on the ocean’s surface. They were sharing a couple of bags of chips that they’d bought from the chippy just aound the corner from Ruth’s house, trying their best to shield them from the prying seagulls circling the skies above them like hawks.

Peter audibly gasped with excitement, “We should get one of those caravans that muggles used to drive all the time in the sixties.”

“Yes! And we could charm it so it’s bigger on the inside like the tents they have at the Quidditch World Cup!” James added, ecstatic just to have been able to chime in with a Quidditch reference, let alone about the actual holiday. Sirius grinned stupidly as they high fived, making Ruth cringe and groan like an embarrassed daughter having to watch her parents kiss. Though, once she thought about it, that analogy was pretty accurate, perhaps more than she would have liked.

Remus held out his hands in suspense, something he always did when he’d thought of a master plan, “Two words. Tardis. Caravan.”

The sounds that then erupted from the group could not be described as human, more like a group of over-excited seagulls.

Once they’d calmed down, which took more time than it probably should have done, James suggested, “We should go to France so Sirius can show his French off!”

Sirius glared at him, muttering under his breath and by doing so, proving James’s point, “Putain de chienne. Je ne me montre pas, vous seriez tous perdus sans moi.”

“Oui, oui, er, baguette,” Peter snorted, rubbing his arm when Sirius hit at him playfully.

“Right, well,” Remus cut in before they jumped at each other’s throats, “Presents? The whole reason we’re here?”

“Gosh, Moony, here I was thinking that you were here because you wanted to see us and enjoy our company, but no, you just want your damn chocolate,” Sirius huffed.

Remus blinked at him for a second before asking tentatively, “Moony?”

“Moony,” he nodded.

Remus pinched his brow and sighed, “I’m going to regret asking but why?”

“Werewolf. Moon. Moony,” he explained as if it was the simplest thing in the world.

He raised an eyebrow at him, “Do I get a say in this by any chance?”

“No. I’ve thought of names for all of us, actually. I’m Padfoot, Peter’s Wormtail, Ruth is Silverspot and James is Prongs,” he counted off his fingers before nodding resolutely.

James smirked, eyes gleaming and Ruth already knew what he was going to say, “Am I Prongs because of my big–”

She slapped a hand over his mouth and glared at him menacingly, “Finish that question and I swear to God, James, I will slap you into next year.”

“Sirius, I think you’ve had far too much spare time on your hands,” Remus said while James and Ruth engaged in a very mature staring competition that lasted all of ten seconds.

“Yeah, five days without us and you’ve given us all nicknames,” Peter added, looking rather concerned for his friend’s mental state.

“Do you want me to change yours to Massive Knobhead?” Sirius asked with a scarily fake smile on his face.

James cut in before any fighting could ensue, “Okay, let’s get on to the presents, shall we?”

Sirius just shrugged and made a noise of vague agreement, while Peter just looked rather relieved to avoid conflict.

*************

“Sirius, will you keep still!”

It was the fifth time that Remus had had to utter those words in the past two minutes, much to everyone’s annoyance and to Sirius’s amusement.

“Keeping still is for wimps!” Sirius announced with a stupid grin on his face before ruffling his hair once again.

“My fingers are gonna fall off from the cold at this rate,” Peter scowled, shooting daggers at Sirius with his eyes. Remus had given him a polaroid camera for Christmas after he’d been going on and on about wanting a muggle one all year, and he’d been trying his best to get a photo of the others for what felt like hours.

“Sirius stand still or I will petrificus totalus your sorry ass,” Ruth groaned, and James had to suppress a cheer when Sirius finally, finally, did as he was told. Peter took the photo as quickly as he could and waited patiently for the photo to develop, grinning when the image came into colour. “Let us see, then!” she exclaimed impatiently, holding her hands out like a baby would and snatching the photo from Peter.

“Oi, careful, I did not wait that long for Sirius to stop moving for you to just rip the bloody photo in half,” Peter huffed, re-joining the group with a false reluctance.

James grinned when he got a look at the photo, “Oh, Pete, that’s a bloody good photo. You should be a photographer or something,” he said, ruffling Peter’s hair playfully as the boy’s face flushed red.

“He’s got a point, Wormtail,” Remus mused, watching Sirius’s face light up at his use of the nickname, “It is a good photo. Though it’s weird having us stood still for once, I’m so used to us being in magical pictures.”

“I like it,” Ruth smiled, glancing at the boys affectionately, “I think it makes it even more special,” she paused for a moment, inhaling the very essence of that moment and relishing in it, “Happy Christmas, lads.”

[seriouslyhooked]

Lost Souls and Reveries (Part 22)

24 part AU written for @cssns​. Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6,Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21. Story available on AO3 Here and FF Here. Banner created by the amazingly talented @shipsxahoy​!!

Killian Jones is a wolf shifter without roots, without plans, and without a pack. He’s a rogue, someone humans should avoid and shifters should be wary of given his lineage. But one night years back set him on a path he didn’t realize he was taking, a path leading to a future he is destined for. That future is tied up in one woman – a human named Emma Nolan. Together Emma and Killian will find not only answers, but a love that’s truly fated. But will love be enough to set them free, or will past demons win out in the end? (Answer: love always wins – I am writing this so despite some tiny pockets of angst it’s basically a fluff-filled insta-love fest). Rated M.

A/N: Hey everyone! I know it has been such a long time since I updated this fic, which is crazy because the chapters are taking place one right after another still, but this fall has been filled with travel and very little free time for me. I didn’t get a chance to write, and though I wanted to get the story out there and share the ideas I’ve had all this time, I wanted to give myself the space to do this story justice. It’s been an ambitious AU for me, there’s a lot of moving parts and way more reveals than I ever do, making it a really big undertaking. But all of your support along the way and your continued interest has helped keep me motivated even in the time I couldn’t work on this. As such, I really hope you will all enjoy this chapter, and I thank you all for reading!

She is never leaving my sight again, Killian thought to himself as he held Emma to his side, keeping ever vigilant about their surroundings out here in the woods.

The two of them had stolen their temporary moment alone after the encounter with the bear, but both of them knew that quiet couldn’t really last forever. Nevertheless, the wish to run away with Emma and barricade her from anything that might harm her was strong in Killian. He resisted, knowing that leaving would not only put everyone else at risk, but that it would make his Emma deeply unhappy, but in the privacy of his own mind, he allowed those thoughts to wander. At the end of the day, his priority was Emma and the baby that she was carrying now, and there was just no changing that.

As if she could hear his mind’s rampant musings, Emma’s hand came to cover his arm, a silent show that she was here and that she was readily accepting his need to protect her. She looked up to him, and though he was certain he hadn’t pushed the worried internal dialogue her way through their mental link, he could see that she knew anyway. He couldn’t hide the hurt and the harried frenzy that nearly losing her had conjured up. It still lingered here with him, as it would until all of this was over and done.

We’ll get through this, she pushed to him quietly, and in response Killian quietly brought her hand to his lips, pressing a delicate kiss atop her smooth and creamy skin before leading it to rest above his heart. The smile she graced him with at the reassuring motion filled him with renewed hope, but yet again their quiet shows of intimacy were short lived.

“I still don’t get it,” a voice interjected, pulling Emma and Killian from their semi-private moment. “He comes to town, tries to kill us all, claims Anna, barrels into the magic force field, and now… nothing.”

Tink’s words, lobbed at the bear that had at first seemed like nothing more than a foe, prompted all of them to look in the beast’s direction. The grizzly was ferocious and imposing still, with eyes a tempered red color, but they lacked the vibrancy of before. Now, instead of glowing a sickening scarlet, they were more molten, a deep burgundy where they were once so bright. The mellowing out of the color signaled to Killian that the bear had calmed somehow, not breaking from its fever, but tamping it down. That didn’t mean he trusted this unknown shifter though, and until they were certain he posed no threat to Emma, that bear was getting nowhere near his woman again.

“Could we maybe keep our less helpful thoughts to ourselves for the time being?” Emma countered, and though the words were sharp, it was understandable why she said them. For as much as the bear was an enigma to them, he was just as much of a puzzle to Anna, if not more so. Emma’s friend was still somewhat dazed from it all, and currently Elsa and Liam were standing with her, the former trying to comfort her sister, and the latter keeping his reflexes sharp in case the lass made a break for the bear.

“Sorry, it’s just…” Tink trailed off, unsure of how to phrase this precarious situation.

“It’s just bat shit crazy is what it is,” Ruby exclaimed.

“And about to get crazier,” Emma’s Uncle Lance noted, commenting on the impending hubbub that was coming down the road right now.

The Nolan’s were all together in their car, not having had the chance to run as Liam, Killian, and Graham had. They’d also had to wait until they were given some sort of all clear. The situation was now somewhat contained, but before that there was too much risk in having Neal, Mary Margaret, or Ruth out here. Killian had never seen Emma’s father in action, but he knew the man had been trained his whole life to be a hunter. David Nolan would have all the necessary skills to have been a part of this fight, but as it turned out, the fight came down almost entirely to the instincts of Emma and her wolf.

“Emma!”

The car was still in motion, braking on the loose, dirt path, but it did nothing to stop Mary Margaret from jumping out and running to her daughter. Killian moved back ever so slightly, knowing what would come next, but he stayed as close as possible to the massive hug Emma’s mother bestowed on her. Tears of relief streamed down the older woman’s face, but she didn’t break down, even in her moment of vulnerability. She may have been human, but Emma’s mother was strong, and fiercely protective of the children she loved so dearly.

“I told you I’d be okay,” Emma whispered, attempting to share a smile with her Mum, and the words felt like a punch to his gut. He closed his eyes briefly, seeing again the image of Emma trapped beneath the snarling bear, but he shook it away, willing himself to be strong for his mate. Reliving that terrible moment did nothing but make him weaker and more worried.

Emma’s father, brother, and grandmother all surrounded her as well, hugging Emma close before turning their attention to the others. Mary Margaret immediately moved to Gwen, trying to take strength from a woman who had answered in their hour of need, and David clearly felt the support of his lifelong friend and capable shifter Lance, but soon the greetings and reunions were tossed aside, and all attention turned to the problem at hand. It was interrogation en masse, and the questions tossed out were free game for all of them and in dire need of answer.

“Is everyone all right?”

“Everyone’s in one piece,” Graham said, having taken account of the whole group’s status as soon as the bear was contained. No one had withstood anything that amplified shifter healing wouldn’t clear up by the end of the day. All in all, they’d been incredibly lucky.  

“Any injuries?”

“Just to my pride. Damn bear got the better of me at one point, and I can’t say I’m too thrilled with that,” Granny quipped, prompting the ghost of a smile to tug at Killian’s lips. In another moment he’d laugh at the old wolf and her totally serious resentment at having been bested, but things being as they were, he couldn’t quite get to the level of comfort needed for a good dose of fun. “But other than that, we’re all fine.”

“Barely,” Emma’s aunt coughed out and Killian watched as Emma’s head snapped to her. A quiet contest of wills elapsed between them. Clearly her aunt wanted to disclose how close things had really come, but Emma wanted to spare her parents the pain of what could have been. It wasn’t clear who would prove victorious, but then Mary Margaret caught the exchange and there was no avoiding the conversation.

“What happened?” Her tone held the firm but alarmed kind of shrillness only a mother could produce.

“Uh, it might be totally out of the realm of normal, but it’s also kind of straight forward,” Tink hedged, shrugging a shoulder as she proceeded to give the barest of highlights, thus helping Emma keep things under wraps. “A giant, angry, magically roided up grizzly shifter came to town, we lured it out here, we got it in the magical crystal thing, and now here we are.”

“Is that all?” David asked, having caught on to his wife’s increased agitation. “Emma?”

Emma’s muscles tightened significantly as the conversation went on, her stance looking more and more like she might just shift and run away from all of this. But instead, she looked to Killian, asking him only with her expression if he’d have her back. Of course he would, and he sealed that silent oath with a kiss to her temple. She leaned into the action for only the briefest of moments before taking a deep breath and coming clean.

The look of anguish on her parents’ faces was likely punishment enough for Emma, who had already felt some guilt about the danger she’d put herself in. Neal, for his part, looked awed at her bravery, and at one point he even interrupted with a word of praise, before a look from his mother quickly cut that thinking off. When Emma was done, it was clear that her mother especially was both wracked with worry and terribly angry. Her emotions were big and jumbled and messy, but though she probably deserved to get them out, Killian felt it was time to step in.

“Obviously there’s a lot to unpack there, but the big thing is Emma is safe now and there will never be another similar instance again.” He looked to Emma, who nodded readily. “And right now we don’t have the luxury of examining this all again. Gold has essentially declared war on us with this attack, and we can’t assume that’ll be the end of it.”

“So we’re certain now that it’s him?” Ruth asked. She was struggling to keep up given how much had been happening and that was understandable. Between Gold and Emma’s great uncle George’s appearance, there were so many unknowns hanging about right now, certainly more than could ever be easily understood.

“There’s too much magic involved for it to be anyone else,” Ruby replied. “But we were hoping you might confirm. The enchantment on the collar is still pulsing even now. It should look similar to the charms you witnessed.”

Ruth followed Ruby towards the choker, which had still yet to be touched by anyone but Emma. Without any discussion about the chance of her being jinxed somehow by the object, Ruth reached out to examine it. She nodded as soon as her skin made contact with the magic itself.

“This is definitely Gold’s work. It looks and feels the same. It’s reptilian almost, if that makes sense.”

“It doesn’t, but not much does anymore,” Liam remarked, and again Killian wished he was in the place to laugh. God knew they all needed it, but with so much still unknown every bit of their energy needed to be tied up in solving this life threatening puzzle.

Ruth continued to examine the artifact, her eyes taking in the material that appeared to be leather bound together by some kind of silver or platinum. It was a strange combination, but there was something in Ruth’s eyes that spoke to familiarity. Killian didn’t know if it was just her identifying the magic or what, but the hairs on the back of his neck went up just before she turned the leather over, a shocked look rushing across her face as she dropped the object back to the ground.  

“Grandma?” Emma asked, having picked up on the same nervous energy that Killian did even before it truly managed to manifest. They both moved towards Ruth, searching for answers, but she appeared speechless as she looked back at them.

“Mom?” David asked, moving towards her quickly, trying to see if she was all right before sparing a glance at the cursed collar. Instantly his face portrayed the same shock, and then he let loose a very rare curse. “Son of a bitch.”

“Language,” Mary Margaret and Emma’s Aunt Gwen both said absently, but it was obviously instinct and driven by no sort of real intention. Within seconds Emma’s mother was at David’s side and held his hand in hers once more. “David, what is it?”

“That sigil.”

Killian turned his focus to the emblem on the leather collar. It was all hard lines and angles, and though it was a random association, Killian thought of how it looked so unlike most shifter symbols. It was clearly old, dating back far before the flags and figures of most great houses, but it sliced through the collar with an authority and a bluntness that looked like many knives hard at work.

“You know it?” Emma asked, prompting her father out of the angry and confused mood he was now grappling with,

“It’s the Nolan crest,” her Dad said. “And not only that, it’s my Uncle’s work. See here,” he motioned at the ridges and how the slices were jagged but perfectly symmetrical. “Nolans for centuries used branding techniques to establish our crest, but my Uncle said it left the smell of smoke. He wanted something cleaner and so he studied the old ways. All this was done with one knife in one stroke.”

“But with magic anything can be recreated, can’t it? It could be a set-up, something to throw us off the trail,” Anna said. Yet even as the words left her lips, she was still trying to figure it all out for herself. “Still, the magic is so obviously Gold’s. No one else can recreate that, why bother with any attempted distraction?”

“It’s not a diversion. It’s a claim. Gold made his with his magic and my brother made his with this,” Ruth said, her words finally reappearing though her eyes were still somewhat glazed over by ghosts from her past. “God, I wished I’d never see this symbol again, never mind the man who made it. To think he’s working with Gold. This is a nightmare.”

“I just don’t get it. Why are they both doing this? What’s the end game?” Graham asked.

“My Uncle’s will be as it always was – to eradicate shifters.”

“Even family?” Killian asked and David nodded.

“But what about Gold?” Elsa asked. “He’s got no ties to any of us but Ruth. Surely she can’t mean that much to him. She’s been awake five years, and he could have found her in any of that time.”

“Look, I don’t know the guy, but from everything you guys have found out, does it really seem like he needs a reason?” Tink asked. “The man is clearly more than a few marbles shy of a whole set.”

“He’ll have a reason,” Ruth responded. “But Elsa’s right, it can’t be me. Most likely it’s you all.” She gestured at Ruby, Elsa, Anna, and Emma.

“All of us?” Emma asked. “I mean I get them, they’re witches, but I’m -,”

“The Nolan heir and a hybrid shifter. Not to mention you’re mated to the true alpha of one of the strongest packs in America. Elsa, Anna, and Ruby have tremendous power, to be sure, and having joined together in one place, they’d be a natural threat to a power-hungry beast like Gold. But you’re truly unique, Emma, something that can’t be recreated, and to Gold that’s worth more than anything.”

“Clearly he’s willing to die over it,” Liam said shaking his head as his eyes met Killian’s. “And he will. Soon as we can find that fu-,” A shove from Elsa reminded Liam of the smaller ears in the group now and he cleared his throat before finding another word that didn’t fit nearly as well. “foe?”

“Not terrible. Not a great save, but not awful,” Neal joked, earning a smile from the adults who were still all in awe that this young boy was managing to swim in the deep end of all of this shifter drama.

“Where’s Lance?” Emma’s father asked, drawing attention to the fact that his old friend was missing from this conversation. Killian hadn’t even noticed, a testament to the extreme stealth of mountain lion shifters.

“He picked up a scent earlier but with the bear and all there was no time. We had to get to you all as fast as we could,” Gwen explained. “He’s circling back to track it now.”

“Another shifter?”

“No. I mean I don’t know. I didn’t even smell anything, but he said there was something…”

At that moment, the low rumble of a wild cat running came through the underbrush and then Lance appeared at the tree line in his shifter form. In the blink of an eye he transformed to human again. This was pretty normal for all of them, as even Emma and her friends had more exposure to shifting this summer, but for Neal it was a shock and that manifested when the boy gasped aloud. One look spared in the boy’s direction showed he was nothing but excited. No fear, no dismay. Just the giddy look of childlike wonder that a kid might have in the face of a perfect Christmas or a trip to Disney World.

“You didn’t recognize it because it’s a scent from before we ever met,” Lance said emerging from the woods. “It’s feint, but it’s citrus rinds and tea leaves.”

“George,” David and Ruth said at the same time, both resigned but obviously perplexed.

“Lance?” Gwen asked, putting her hand to his arm in question, echoing everyone else’s confusion.

“Hunters bathe in salted citrus waters with tea leaves before an attack. It largely suppresses human scent and keeps them nearly untraceable, blending in with forest smells better than any other combination. I only know about it at all because it’s what David always smelled like growing up.”

“He’s here?” Emma’s father asked, skipping over the tea bath tidbit.

“If he isn’t then he was. Trail leads to the clinic. It’s strong there but no sign of him. SUV tire tracks in the dirt. Recently left.”

“Was the SUV big enough to hold him?” Anna asked, motioning towards the bear, her face angrier than Killian had ever seen it.

“Would have been a cramped cage,” Lance admitted, making the air around Anna practically crackle with her resentment of David’s Uncle. A breeze floated in the glen around them, and in it there was a glinting of light that spoke to something more than wind. It was Anna’s palpable energy, and though she did her best to conceal it, the storm inside her mind and heart was starting to brew in the world around them. “But there’s more. The clinic has been marked, and the animals inside are feeling very on edge. You’re gonna want to get over there before some humans do.”

“Wait but hold on, how is this even possible?” Emma asked, stalling everyone in their tracks before they sped off to the clinic. “How would your Uncle have had time to get here after messing with Neal? The bear attacked maybe thirty minutes after you left. And I’m sorry, I don’t care how skilled a hunter he is. You’re telling me he brought a giant grizzly in a huge SUV into the city Boston? Doesn’t that seem like a really dumb idea?”

“Emma’s right, the timeline is all off,” Killian affirmed, and it seemed to dawn on the others how accurate that was.

“I showed Neal a picture once we got back to the house, and he confirmed it was definitely George who approached him.”

“But what if it wasn’t?” Ruby asked, turning her inquiry to Emma’s brother. “Neal, was there anything strange about the man who approached you?”

“You mean other than the fact that he cornered me and said all that cryptic stuff about my being a hunter and his family?” Ruby nodded. “Uh, I don’t know he spoke kind of fast. Like a little faster than was easy to follow. Made the already crazy stuff he said even more confusing. It also felt like he was kind of talking to himself, answering his own questions when I didn’t really feel like he’d asked anything. And he kept flicking his wrist as he talked and then balling it up. His face got mad when he did that but only for a second.”

“That doesn’t sound like George,” Ruth said critically. “He’s a methodical man. His whole life has been about control and perfection. He speaks so well, he’s a vocal coach’s dream. Same with his movements.”

“Hunters don’t fidget,” David said, sounding like he was repeating words he was oft told in his past life as opposed to making any sort of additional commentary.

“Could a human smell a hunter, even though shifters mostly can’t?” Neal asked and Emma’s father responded.

“Yes but it would be almost unnoticeable. Why do you ask?”

“Well I didn’t really think much of it but I smelled something awful in the air when he came up to me. I thought it was just one of those city pockets you know? Where the air is just dirty and you kinda have to walk through it.”

“Could be,” Ruby said, “But sulfuric smells can be a side effect of dark magic. Ruth, what was Gold like when you interacted with him all those years ago? Do you remember?”

“Well he was much more unbalanced than George, that’s for sure. Gold used to talk in riddles anytime I met with him and always so fast you barely knew what he was saying. Now that you mention it the wrist thing sounds like something too. He used to kind of flick his up like this,” Ruth said, displaying a gesture that was almost caricature of what a person with magic might do.

“So the body language and the other clues hint that Neal was actually dealing with Gold and not George, and if that’s the case he must have used a glamour spell,” Elsa acknowledged. “Unless there’s another way?”

“No, for him to look like George it would have to be a glamour, it would explain the smell, but it would also take a lot of magical energy. He should be really weak after expending himself like that. I mean between that and the magic that’s been spent on trapping this bear… he shouldn’t even be alive.”

“’Should’ doesn’t really seem like a word that fits in our world at the moment,” Granny sassed and they all agreed. There was no reason to assume Gold was anything but fully healthy right now, no doubt through some sinister means.

“I think realistically we need to split this up. George has apparently left this mess for me at the clinic. We should start there,” Emma’s father said, nodding to Lance and his mother who both silently accepted their new assigned posts.

“Usually I’d say I’m all we need over at team ‘scent tracker,’ but with everything that’s happened today and all the breaches…”

“You need help,” Graham said, filling in for Tink without hesitation. “I’d go, but we need to keep up the appearance of normalcy for the rest of the town, and after this bear warning people are going to have questions.”

“I’ll go with Tink,” Granny offered, surprising most of them before letting out a disgruntled huff and straightening her shoulders. “Oh please, I’m old, I’m not dead. Heck the kids would say I’ve got ‘mad skills’ when it comes to tracking.”

“Any kids who would have said that are probably in their mid-thirties by now,” Killian whispered, and despite everything Emma squawked out something close to a laugh. She then sent him a sharp but loving look, telling him that now was not the time but that she did find him funny.

“As much as we have to find George, we need to track Gold just as badly,” Elsa proclaimed. “I still don’t sense him as being the biggest threat, but he’s in this too and if we’re ever going to get an idea of what the end game is, we need to know everything we can.”

“So that leaves what?” Ruby asked. “Bear watch? Liam and Killian can handle that.”

“What about us?” Emma asked, motioning towards her brother and her mother.

“We need to put some of that natural organizing to good use,” Ruth said adamantly. “Mary Margaret, you more than anyone could try and map this out. Getting everything we know in one place could help make everything more clear.”

“Plus no one is better at wrangling multiple groups,” Gwen added, waving her walkie talkie in the air before nodding towards Graham. “You’ve got a direct line to all of us, and the patience and know-how to get everything you need.”

“Well when you put it like that,” Emma’s mother said, clearly pleased with her role. “So what are we waiting for? This war ain’t gonna win itself.”

And since that was true, they all moved off to their designated jobs, though Killian kept track of Emma constantly. Luckily her mother decided to set up their brainstorming outside here in the glen, so as much as Killian was on bear watch, he was also looking out for his mate. Killian would not let anything happen to Emma and their family, so right now it was his mission to use all of his years of experience as a shifter to aid in their protection. In the long span of his life where he sought to avenge his mother, and then in the years spent tracking and avoiding any signs of Liam and his pack, he had become a well-honed machine. His skills allowed him to feel ready for whatever may come, and he trusted that his love of Emma and his want to protect both her physical being and her heart would make anything possible. Whatever foe may present themselves, he would handle them, because there was no other option as far as he or his wolf were concerned.

That readiness and familiarity with trouble, however, did not apply to everyone, and there was one person amongst them who more than anyone must be flummoxed and uneasy given all the tumult. Killian looked even now at young Neal and he felt for the boy. He was putting on a brave face, but there was still concern that made its way to the surface now and then. Emma’s brother hid it well from his overbearing and constantly watchful mother, but when Mary Margaret moved away to talk with Gwen on the walkie talkie about everything going on at the clinic, Killian saw a chance to try and do some good.

“You holding up all right, lad?”

Killian posed the question like it could in any way be straight forward to this young boy. Emma’s brother had woken up this morning a gifted but largely ordinary child. He was brilliant to be sure, but he had no real notion of what any of this meant. Human science alone couldn’t prepare him for this, not when the books they taught in schools mentioned nothing of this whole different part of the world. It must be a great shock to him, yet here Neal stood, ready for action and above the fray of questions most people, no matter what age, would grapple with when a situation like this arose.

“It makes sense in a way,” Neal admitted, shrugging his shoulder. “Not the whole my great uncle is working with a warlock thing. That’s just crazy.”

“Aye it is. But the shifting, and your wolf, they’re not as surprising to you?”

“I had dreams, back when everyone thought I was going to die.” Neal shrugged at the memory of those times, because his childhood illness was just a part of his life. It was a painful chapter of the Nolan family story, but Neal looked to be all the stronger for it now. “They were pretty all over the place. I was sleeping all the time and I was in and out, but there was a woman towards the end, that I remember. She was nice, with a smile like my mom. I knew I could trust her, and the next thing I knew she turned into a wolf and I did too. It was weird, but it felt right, you know?”

Killian gulped, knowing that the woman Neal spoke of was his mother. He debated telling the boy the full truth, but given everything that he was saddled with now, it didn’t seem wise. There would be time, hopefully, when all of this had been resolved and he and Emma could have a full discussion with Neal about all they’d learned. They’d tell him of Emma’s own dreams, of the process Elsa’s magic had undertaken to save them both, and how Killian’s mother found a way even beyond the grave to watch over him and the family he would one day love. But for now, the best course of action was bolstering Neal’s faith and telling him this would all work out okay.

“It must be strange, to learn of what you are later like this. I know for Emma it was a unique process. It can be overwhelming. But it’s also…” he searched for the right words.

“Uh, totally cool?” Neal filled in, looking genuinely enthusiastic. “I mean I can turn into a wolf. That’s pretty bad ass.”

Killian and Neal’s heads both whipped towards the direction of Mary Margaret, but despite her motherly senses, she seemed to have missed her son’s bit of cursing. That was likely for the best.

“It’s an amazing gift to be sure. I know I’d never feel truly whole without my wolf. I’m glad you and Emma will have that now too.”

“Yeah. I just wish I didn’t have to wait. I mean five more years? That feels like forever.”

Killian smiled and he knew that for Neal it must seem like just that. As a kid, years felt like they’d never pass, and time would never move in the direction that you wanted it. It took the benefit of hindsight to see that everything comes exactly when it should, and as a new shifter, Neal would be in much better shape if he had a few years of understanding who he was before moving into that phase of his life.

“When things calm down, we should talk. You’ll have questions, and while your father is well versed in much of the shifter world, he might not have all the answers.”

“Did your Dad have them?” Neal asked, not out of any malice, but because he just genuinely didn’t know the history of Killian and his family.

“No, but I was lucky to have an elder brother.”

“And now I will too,” Neal said, like Killian’s new status in the family was a long time given. Killian smiled at that, nodding.

“Aye. That you will. Whatever you need, Neal, I’ll be here to help. So will Emma, and Liam, and all of us.”

“Like a real pack,” Neal said and Killian thought about it a moment before nodding. After all, what else could they be called at this point? There were so many of them, shifter, witch, and otherwise, tied together through love, through family ties and friendship. If that wasn’t a pack as it was intended to be then Killian didn’t know what it was.

Feeling secure in the fact that Neal was okay, Killian planned to switch his attention back to the others and their deliberations, but the bear suddenly let forth a harsh huff of air, propelling the front of his body up into the air, before stomping its thick paws into the earth below. Killian went on alert, preparing to get to Emma if the grizzly should break free, but then he gathered that the others were talking about the bear and the bear was somehow communicating, though perhaps not very effectively.

“It’s the weirdest thing,” Neal said, shaking his head as he watched the captive beast.

“Seeing a mammoth grizzly in a magic cage? Yeah, weird is one way of putting it.”

“It’s not that. It’s the smell around him. It’s sterile and sharp. I swear it smells like when I was in the hospital. Like an IV but not quite.”

Sniffing the air, Killian could at first only sense the overwhelming stench of a shifter sickness and Gold’s magic, but there, underneath those notes, there was something he belatedly recognized as medical. Now that Neal said it, he wondered how he, or any of the other shifters had missed it all this time.

“I’ve got news for you, lad: those supposed genius tendencies of yours are not purely human. You’re gonna be a hell of a shifter.”

Neal grinned at that, and after Killian urged him to tell the others, a whole new door of inquiry opened. Everyone came back from their separate corners of Storybrooke, seeking to put a new piece of the puzzle in place.

“Magic and medicine? But that’s crazy. Can it even be done?” Tink asked.

“I think we’re looking at the proof,” Elsa hedged, gesturing at the bear.

“Did anyone get a bite of his neck?” Emma asked and the others who had been there in the thick of the fight shook their head. “He’s got two puncture marks there, I saw a flash of them when I took the collar off, but I just assumed…”

“Let’s all just make a plan to stop doing that for the time being,” Graham said and they heartily agreed, for surely assuming anything was getting them nowhere. They had to start from scratch and do as Neal had done, study the problem just with the facts and clues before them.

“Are the marks identical, Emma?” Neal asked and after a moment of reflection Emma nodded.

“Yeah, they looked pretty similar. I only caught a quick glimpse though.”

“Can you get him closer to us?” Neal asked and Mary Margaret shook her head.

“Neal, no -,”

“He doesn’t need to leave the enclosure, Mom. I just need to see his neck. Emma said there’s two punctures. That’s rare in medical treatment of any kind, human or animal. There’s usually only one puncture site. Whenever I needed more than one medicine they stuck me in different places or they’re infused through one site, resulting in only one puncture. Two identical pierces is almost unheard of. In fact, the only researchers I know that have regularly and successfully used two study genetically based nervous system manipulation.”

“Uh, can you repeat that in English?” Liam replied and Killian related to his brother’s sentiment. This was elevated stuff well beyond the experience set of any of the adults here, save for maybe Emma and David who had a veterinary background, and Neal was a teenager. How did he know about this?

“Basically treatment to regrow and stabilize a broken nervous system. Yes, it’s super complicated and obscure, and before you ask, I just spent the summer rooming with a medical prodigy who is headed to Columbia pre-med at 14. You pick up stuff when all your friend talks about is cutting edge science stuff.”

“That’s brilliant, Neal, but what makes you think that this has anything to do with that?”

“Well the dual needle there wasn’t just used for fun, it was necessary to yield any positive results. The doctors were trying to infuse damaged nervous systems with a lining that would revamp nerves and allow for an artificial system reboot. They needed two different solutions to do that, and they needed to mix at the same rate through the body while not being combined outside of the system itself. They said that allowing the chemical interaction to happen inside the body actually improved the lasting effects of the treatment.”

“So that begs the question, how do we get closer to him?”

Granny’s query prompted all of them to look to Anna automatically, but that only prompted Elsa to get defensive.

“No! No way! Absolutely not! You are not going in there.”

“Elsa we need to know,” Anna replied, her tone even, not matching the loudness or the fear of her sister. “And it’s like I keep telling you. He won’t hurt me.”

“Maybe we can just ask him to come closer?” Emma added, clearly not wanting her friend anywhere near that bear without the barrier still between them.

“But what if one of the solutions Neal is talking about isn’t just science?” Ruby replied, her brow furrowed together. “If it’s magical then we need a witch to gauge that and that would be damn near impossible with Elsa and Anna’s enchantment as strong as it is.”

“We’re not doing this,” Elsa said, her anguish clear, but the fight in her starting to fail somewhat.

“What other choice do we have, Elsa? We’re in danger and more than that we’re blind. We need answers. We need them to stay safe, and we need them to heal him. He has to be okay, Elsa. He just has to be.”

The connection Anna felt to this bear was strong already though she’d never even seen his human form. Killian understood that, and though it must feel impossible to accept that Anna might be in any kind of danger, Elsa did too. All she needed to do was think about when it was Liam. When the two of them first met, Liam was still unstable and unwell, perhaps to a different degree, but Elsa stood by him. She was devoted right from the start, and she did everything she could to heal his brother and to stop his pain. Anna wanted to do the same thing, and now Elsa had to support her, fear and all.

You will not hurt her, do you hear me?

The mental push came from Emma and was aimed at the bear, but Killian still heard it. Her eyes were wary, set on the grizzly as her face gave nothing but seriousness away. The bear snorted but gave a sharp nod, unwilling or unable to reply with coherent thoughts, but showing with animal action that he was not in an aggressive place.

“Okay, Anna. You can go in there, but only for a minute. You find out what we need to know and then you get back out here. Are we clear?” Emma asked and Anna nodded. Without any more deliberation she moved to the edge of the crystal enclosure and then she stepped in.

Not knowing how things would go made the moment of Anna’s examination emotionally fraught, but beyond that this was a moment that both Emma’s friend and this unknown shifter must be craving on a cellular level. They were fated mates, destined to be together and yet unable to have more than a brief interaction. They couldn’t even speak to each other, and the fact that this was all happening while he was a bear must make things even more confusing. Yet none of that translated. Instead, Anna approached with cautious determination, stopping just before the bear and pausing only for a moment before she raised her hand to the bear’s face. Her hand made contact and everyone held their breath until the bear made a low, but welcoming growl.

“Hi,” Anna murmured after a moment, her voice raspier than usual. “This isn’t how I thought something like this would happen. I had all these ideas about who you’d be and how we’d meet and this is just… well, different.”

The bear closed its eyes for a moment exhaling what could only be called a grizzly form of a sigh, and then nuzzled more so into Anna’s touch. A sign of agreement and docility that was so alien a concept with a shifter this sick.

“Anna.” Elsa’s calling out to her sister reminded Anna of her mission and she straightened her stance and nodded.

“Right. I have to fix this. I have to help you. And I don’t know if you heard what we were saying but -,”

The bear didn’t even need to hear the rest of her request, instead shifting so Anna could be up close and personal with his neck and the site of the punctures Emma had seen. Anna let out a sound of sadness at seeing where the bear had been injured.

“What do you see?” Neal asked.

“Two puncture marks, just like Emma said. And they’re really big and thick. I can see why you thought someone bit him. He’s started to heal over it but there’s scarring and…” she raised her hand over the wound but trailed off from speaking to them.

“And what?” Ruby asked.

“You were right Ruby, I can feel the magic. Some sort of potion of something. But there’s something else here. Some residue of something else.”

“We need to see that!” Neal said, his desire to figure out this puzzling situation clear as day. “We can test his fur or maybe get some blood work, but it would be better if we had the actual solution itself.”

With just the barest flutter of her fingers Anna used her magic to extract the droplets of whatever liquid coated the bear’s fur. It was entrancing to see, and the little bits of whatever injection was used hung suspended in the air. It was a small amount, but small was better than nothing at all. “I need something to put this in.”

A vile was produced from Mary Margaret’s bag, and no one bothered to ask why she had it. No doubt some sort of ‘always be prepared mentality’ and Emma brought it to the edge of the barrier with Killian right behind her. But while they expected Anna to come right away, she was stalled, wanting, no doubt, to stay close to her mate.

“I know how hard this must be, Anna, but the sooner we figure out what this is the sooner you can heal him.”

“I’m going to fix this,” Anna said, for the bear’s benefit and not for any of theirs. “We’re gonna find out what this is and I swear I will fix it.”

At the mention of her leaving, the bear’s eyes went dark, looking more onyx than any shade of red. It reminded Killian of his father and of Liam and it all clicked. This was some sort of manufactured alpha sickness. It had to be. But just as soon as that darkness came, the bear shook its head and pushed it back again, its irises back to a deep burgundy color. The bear hoisted its body up and then stomped its two front feet to the ground but made no more sounds. It was a dismissal of Anna, and a nonverbal warning that she had to go now before he lost control. Anna seemed to understand and she moved quickly towards the barrier and back outside with all of them. With shaky hands she used her magic to put the droplets in the vial and then sealed it before handing it to Neal.

“You want me to look at it?” Neal asked, his eyes growing wide.

“Yes, Neal, I do. You were right about the injections, and if we didn’t have that we’d pretty much have nothing to go on,” Anna said. “You are brilliant, and you are my brother, in every way that matters. Right?”

“Right,” Neal agreed without hesitation.

“I know it’s asking a lot, and I know you might not be able to handle everything alone, but I just need you to try. Anything you learn is helpful. Anything. I can do the magical stuff, but I don’t know anything about medicine.”

“I’m gonna need help,” Neal said looking to Emma and Emma nodded.

“And you’ve got it. You’ve got me and Dad. I don’t know much about double injections or genome treatments, but I’ll do whatever I can. We’ve got equipment at the clinic. We can run some tests and see what compounds we’re working with and -,”

Killian was about to speak up and say that Emma needed to think about this before making any bold decisions. She’d been through the ringer today, and this testing would no doubt be an involved process. It worried Killian that Emma would continue exerting so much energy when she’d had such a close call earlier, but surprisingly it was Neal who vocalized that worry first.

“That’s exactly what we’re gonna do, Emma. But I think Dad and I have got this for now. You should rest up. You’ve had a way longer day than the rest of us.”

“But I can help too,” Emma reasoned.

“And you will. But maybe tomorrow, all right? This is gonna take a while. We won’t find any answers right away anyway. You know that.”

Killian waited eagerly, hoping that Emma would reach that conclusion on her own as well, and he felt himself relax when she agreed. It was such a relief to know that Emma wouldn’t be over extending herself into the wee hours of the morning. The day was already fading away, with the sun dipping low in the trees, and Killian knew that what his mate needed was food, rest, and time away from the insanity of their world right now.

The others all agreed with Neal’s take, and with a new plan in motion people started to split up, headed for their evenings in different ways. The Nolans headed to the clinic to grab start testing things both at the lab and then back home, while Ruby, Anna, and Elsa agreed that they should try and process the magical concoction that Anna had sensed in the bear and in the collar. Ruby would do so with her family’s archives back at Graham’s, but where Elsa tried to offer a similar scenario for her and Anna, Anna was uninterested.

“I’m not leaving him,” Anna said sternly, looking back to the bear with a fierceness of conviction that had no chance of being swayed. Knowing this instinctively, Elsa let out a small sigh but nodded.

“Okay, so we stay.”

“You two mind?” Liam asked, and Killian smirked at his brother’s question. Even if he did mind it wouldn’t matter much. Liam would just camp out here with his mate and her sister. But there was no need, not when he had somewhere else he and Emma could go.

“Knock yourselves out,” he quipped, gesturing to the doorway. “We’ll just pack a bag and be out of your hair.”

“We’re not staying?” Emma asked, looking surprised, but also a bit relieved if the flash in her eyes was anything to go off of.

“I have a better idea, love. That is, if you trust me.”

“Always,” Emma said, and though he stole a fleeting kiss from her lips, it was but a mere morsel to tide him over until real privacy could be procured.

True to their word, they took only a few minutes to pack what they needed, and then they were off. They could have walked to their destination, or shifted and run over, but with George still on the loose and Gold MIA Killian wanted the opportunity at a faster getaway if need be. The drive was rather short, even with a stop at the town diner to grab some dinner, and the most notable change was that they went from the deep woods where their cabin was further towards the coast just at the edge of town. Eventually the paved Storybrooke road turned to one of pebbles and dirt, and Emma looked both amused and confused at why they would be going this way. Her eyes soon shifted though to mere enjoyment, as she took in the picturesque surroundings of this coastal lane, surrounded by greenery and bushes that held large summer flowers in shades of pinks and blues and whites.

“They’ll be paving this soon,” Killian announced and Emma’s brow furrowed as she looked from their surroundings back towards him once more.

“How do you know that? No one even lives here.”

“Ah, perhaps not yet, but the house has been recently purchased and a move in is likely inevitable.”  

“Well the new owners have done a ton of work. This was all overgrown before. Has been since I was a kid. I always loved this house though.” Emma made the comments just before they pulled around the bend, and when she saw the house in question her jaw dropped and her shock was palpable in the car. “Oh my God! Look at that. It’s… well it’s…”

“Do you like it?” Killian asked and Emma nodded immediately though her brow furrowed with confusion.

“I do, it’s gorgeous, but I don’t understand. When you said there was somewhere else we could go I assumed you meant my place above the clinic.”

“We could have gone there, but tell me you wouldn’t have then been tempted to burn the candle all night searching for answers.” Emma couldn’t say that truthfully so she opted not to respond, giving Killian the space to pull her closer as he confessed his intentions. “When we were in the woods before I told you that someday would be here sooner than you think. This house was  meant to be your wedding present, but I think, all things considered, we should cherish every moment that we have.”

“I thought you were talking about the baby” Emma whispered, her eyes misting over with happy tears as he stole a kiss from her lips with soft but sure affection. His hand came over her stomach automatically at the mention of their pup and when his lips pulled away from hers, he couldn’t help his genuine smile.

“I was, my love. Our family is on the path to exactly what we’re wanting. But as much as I cherish our cabin in the woods, this,” he waved his arms at the house before them. “This is the home you and our little ones deserve.”

With Emma still stunned into near silence, Killian produced the keys to the house from his pocket, having grabbed them from the cabin discretely enough to escape Emma’s notice. On the keychain there was also a token charm that had caught his fancy while in town. It had a swirling design that looked like the fur of a wolf when examined up close, or the sea in the midst of great uncertainty. In the foreground of the metalwork, there was an anchor, and for whatever reason, he found he liked that symbolism and that it made him think of his mate and the life that they were building together. In every way, Emma was his anchor, an anchor to goodness and love and hope, all things he now could no longer live without and that he wished to carry with him always.

“Killian.”

His name was all that Emma could seem to say in this moment, and her fingertips came to cover her mouth as she shook her head in awe. For a split second he wasn’t totally sure if he had made the right call. Buying one of her favorite houses in town might seem like a great idea, but perhaps Emma wanted to be more involved herself in the process of finding their forever home. There was so much that had to be selected and chosen to bring the house into this century and up to a livable code, while still maintaining the quintessential charm of the coastal Maine mansion. But when Emma’s green eyes welled with happy tears and her cheeks flushed that familiar shade of pink, he knew he’d made no wrong moves. Emma was happy with this, and that was all that he had ever wanted.

“Now I should warn you, love, not everything is finished. I gave them a timeline of the end of the summer, knowing that I wanted it done by our wedding night. But it’s structurally sound, and the upstairs is all furnished. Well at least it’s supposed to be and I -,”

Emma laughed at his sudden feeling of remorse, and then she pulled him in for a kiss so fast that he lost all sense of himself before his worry could actually begin to take hold. All there was in this moment was Emma and her happiness. Out here, away from everyone else, Killian allowed his overprotective need to kick in, and with a quick maneuver, he had Emma backed against the front door, knowing he had boxed her in, but never going so far as to hurt her. If anything, it just turned his mate on, and she arched even closer, taking as much from this kiss as he did, until they finally broke apart.

“You bought us a house,” Emma whispered.

“Aye, love,” he said, cupping her cheek after brushing some of her hair back from her beautiful face. “I bought us a house.”

“How do you always manage this?” She asked, and Killian didn’t know what exactly she meant by ‘this’ but he awaited her assessment whatever it may be. “Every time things go sideways, there you are, making things better. This is perfect, in every way. There’s only one thing I wish was different.”

“What is it love?”

“I wish I was already your wife. I wish we didn’t have to wait anymore.”

Hearing that amplified Killian’s own want for the same exact thing, but despite the fact that they had tonight ‘off’ so to speak, a wedding, a real wedding, worthy of his mate and all her hopes and dreams, just couldn’t be done. As such, he had to improvise.

“Do you, Emma Nolan, choose me, Killian Jones for this day and all your days? In sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, in this life and any more we may be blessed enough to see?”

“I do,” Emma said, with tears glistening in her eyes as she smiled, looking at him with all the love in the world. “And do you, Killian Jones, choose me back? Will you promise to love me, to cherish me, and to honor me in every way I plan to do for you, for this day and for always, no matter what may come?”

“I do,” he replied and Emma let out a soft laugh, a tantalizing sound that caught on the wind before fading away as their lips came together to seal their vows to each other.

They were now, in their hearts, man and wife, mate and mate, and though it might not be ‘official,’ Killian knew in that moment that he and Emma had bound themselves together in a new and enduring way. And so, even though things might not be going exactly according to plan, Killian delighted in the moment when he swung his love up in his arms and whisked into the house of their future and showing her the place that would be the site of their hopefully impending happily ever after.

Post-Note: So there we have it! I know this chapter has taken so long to come about, but with so many elements that I had wanted to incorporate, I knew I needed time to not only write, but to read through what I’ve already written. This whole George and Gold fiasco will soon be coming to a head, BUT please be informed it might not all be in this particular story... For those of you who have been begging me for a story that includes CS but is mostly told from the POVs of others, you will be *eventually * getting your wish. Elaborating more would be spoiling what is yet to come, so I’ll leave it there, but suffice it to say I am really excited for this next cool idea when it does come to pass. aAs always I appreciate you guys reading this, and I hope you all enjoyed and have a wonderful rest of your week!!

[forallyourikemensengokuneeds]

Raising a princess ch 3

The alarm went off and he groaned. He had not slept well since he realized he liked the woman at the daycare. His dreams had become invaded by x rated things that he never imagined doing to another person but he woke up every time extremely hard and even more lonely. He honestly was not looking forward to seeing the woman today. He didn’t know if he could look her in the eye with the things he had been dreaming about her.

Sakura was already up and waiting for him. she had been this way since hey had changed schools. She was waiting impatiently for him to finish putting on his uniform so they could sit and have breakfast together. “So Sakura Miss Kristy may be taking you home today or tomorrow. I don’t know which day I will have to stay late.” He said breaking the silence in the room as he made her waffles.

“Okay daddy.” She said with a smile.

“Will you be a good girl?” he asked.

“Daddy! I am always a good girl.” Sakura said and he looked at the small girl and almost laughed. She was the most precocious child on the planet.

“Okay. Just be good. I may need Miss Kristy to watch you again.” He said.

“Okay.” Sakura said as she put on her backpack and he wrote out the check for the daycare before they left. He stuffed it into his pocket and grabbed his own bags and helped her in the car. She sat in her seat and buckled her in. “I love you daddy.”

“What do you want?” Mitsuhide asked as he looked at the little girl who was beaming up at him like an angel.  

“Nuthing daddy.” She said and he chuckled.

“Okay then. I love you too sweetheart.” He said as he got in and started the car. He drove off towards the daycare and in the silence he schooled his facial expression to hide his feelings about the person who would undoubtedly be at the school waiting to greet them for the day.

When they pulled up into the parking lot Sakura waited for him to unbuckle her and then she hopped out of the car. He watched his tiny little princess as she twirled about and he grabbed her bag and slung it over his shoulder. He reached out his hand and soon enough her tiny one was in it. He looked down at her and smiled as the walked into the building. There was no one in the front of the school which was rare. He walked back to the classroom and helped Sakura put her things away. She went off to the teachers and he signed her in to the room. He walked back slowly and saw the tiny woman who haunted his dream for the past two nights sitting in the office.

“Good morning Miss Kristy.” He said as he neared the office.

“Oh Mr. Akechi I didn’t see you or Sakura come in. Good morning.” She said as she smiled her smile that seemed like a warm ray of light.

“I  have Sakuras next month payment.” He said as he held up the check to hand to her. She reached out to start writing a receipt for him and their fingers brushed. He almost dropped the check completely. “I may need someone to watch Sakura tonight or tomorrow depending on when I have my meetings.”

“When you find out just give me a call. I can do it either day. I don’t really have a life.” Kristy said with a light airy laugh.

“No significant other?” he asked.

“God no.” she said. “I have been so focused on school that I kind of forgot about that part of life.”

“That I understand.” He said chuckling.

“I guess you would.” She said as she looked at him. She went back to writing the receipt for him.

“If it is today do you need me to leave the car seat for you?” he asked.

“No I have one in the back of my car.” She said and he tilted his head to ask a question. “As I told you a lot of my cousins and I went here as kids, well their kids also go here as well as my nieces and nephews. I get to bring them home sometimes. I just keep one in the car for those times.”

“Oh I see.” He said. “I meant to ask you what year are you on in medical school?”

“I have one more class that I missed my last year. It fills up quick and I will be done. I am hoping to get it this semester. Then I have to figure out the mcats.” She said.

“Impressive.” He said. “We never discussed a fee either.”

“That is because I don’t charge.” She said.

“What?” he asked.

“I love these kids like they are my own family. I don’t charge people to watch them for a few extra hours.” She said.

“But I have to pay you something.” He said. “It wouldn’t feel right if I didn’t.”

“We will talk about it later, Mr. Akechi.” She said with a smile.  “Where did you want me to take her?’

“You can bring her back to the house if you want. She would probably behave better there.” He said, “There is an extra key in her backpack in the small pouch.”

“Alright.” Kristy said as she looked up as she handed over the receipt. “You have a good day Mr. Akechi.”

“You too. Miss Kristy.” He said as he pocketed the receipt and started out the door to begin his day.

Her aunt Ruth walked in. “A single father like him would be perfect for you.” The older woman said.

“Aunt ruth please. He is focused on his daughter and her well being. I am sure he could have any woman in the world with the way he looked. He wouldn’t like me.” Kristy said as she looked out the window to the man getting in his car. It took everything she had to remain calm when he was even near the building.

“Child come on. You are beautiful and brilliant who wouldn’t want someone like you to help them raise their daughter? A strong woman is the best role model.” Ruth said as she looked at the younger woman.

“Like you aunt Ruth?” Kristy asked as she hugged her aunt.

“You are twice the woman I was at your age.” Ruth said with a fond smile and a pat on the head. “I remember the day you walked in here for the first time. You looked at everything and you sat in this office and told me ‘yo esta aqui’ and you did. You stayed right in that spot for the rest of the day. You refused to learn or speak English I think for months though you were right there sitting. In a way I knew you would be a strong woman then and you have not disappointed me.”

“Thank you Aunt Ruth.” She said as she remembered that time as well.

“Now what about him?” Ruth asked.

“Nothing.” Kristy said, “I am doing a little extra work for him concerning Sakura. I may be watching her a few days this month.”

“Oh is he going on dates?” Ruth asked.

“No working late.” Kristy said.

“Well have fun then.” Ruth said as she walked around to the other rooms and all of her children were arriving. She thought of every child that came to this small school was either one of hers or like a grandchild.

She had pictures of past students as they grew up all over her walls. Including the first group that was her actual children and nieces and nephews. They helped build this school into the special place it was now. Every child here was important. Ruth had taken an interest in the small girl named Sakura who only had a father. It would be nice to see her niece settle down and have a family of her own as well. The small girl would be a nice addition to the actual family Ruth thought with a smile as she looked over all the three year olds in the class with fond eyes for the smaller girl who excelled at nearly everything she did.

 It was mid-day that he knew the long meeting would be that day instead of the next. He went back to his office and took out the slip of paper that Kristy had given him the friday before out. He called the number.

“Hello?” she said as she picked up.

“Hi, Miss Kristy. This is Mitsuhide Akechi, Sakura’s father.” He stuttered out and he began to feel like a complete moron.

“Hi Mr. Akechi.” She said. “What can I help you with?”

“I just found out the meeting I told you about this morning is today and not tomorrow but may go into tomorrow.” He stammered out.

“So you need me to watch Sakura tonight?” she asked.

“Yes.” He said wanting to slam his head against his desk.

“Not a problem. I am probably going to take off in an hour is it okay for me to take her then?” Kristy asked.

“If that is what you want to do. I have no problems with it. If you want to go back and get her that is fine too.” He said.

“I’ll take her.” She said. “I will stop and get my books for review and them we will be at your house. Is this a good number for me to reach if there is a problem?”

“Yes. I will have my phone on me.” He said. He felt like a complete loser when he thought of how he sounded.

“Alright I will see you when you get home.” Kristy said and for a moment he could let those words mean something completely different.

“Sounds like a plan.” He said, “Thank you again Kristy.”

“Not a problem at all Mr. Akechi.” She said and hung up. She saved his number in her phone. She then went on to finish the things she needed to do for their new computer system and then she would be ready to leave.

She walked into the room of three year olds and spotted her as she came running over. “Miss Kristy!”

“Well hello My favorite little flower.” Kristy said as she got down to the little girls level. “I just got off the phone with your dad. I will be taking you home and watching you for a little bit okay?”

“That sounds fun, Miss Kristy!” Sakura said. Kristy stood up and signed out the girl to the raised eyebrows of the teachers.

Kristy turned around and looked at them ,”I am watching Sakura tonight while her dad has a late meeting.”

“Good bye Sakura.” Her teacher waved as the other also waved.

“Come on Sakura.” Kristy said as she walked out of the classroom with a small backpack over her shoulder. “We are going to go get some of my books for my school from my house and then I will take you to yours.”

“Will daddy be coming home soon?” Sakura said.

“I don’t know when your daddy will be home but we will have some fun. Do you like the princess’s?” Kristy asked.

“Yes!” Sakura said.

“Which one?” Kristy asked as she lifted the little girl up into the car seat.

“Ariel!” Sakura said.

“Belle is my favorite.” Kristy said.

“You like princesses?” the tiny girl asked with wide eyes.

“Of course I do!” Kristy said with a laugh and she got into the car and started it up. She talked the whole way with the little girl in the back seat who was even more animated then she normally was. That was when Kristy realized she had no one else who would talk to her about the things that little girls normally liked. Kristy thought she might bring up an idea to help her father with this later when he got home. Right now she had more important things to do like get some books and a movie for the two of them to watch.

[shireness-says]

Ear-resistible

Summary: Emma may be out the night before Easter as a favor to Mary Margaret, but she didn't expect to see Killian Jones in the center of town. After midnight. In a rabbit suit. Rated T for language. ~2.5K. Also on Ao3.

A/N: Happy Easter to those who celebrate it! Yes, this is going up a little early, but I’ll be busy tomorrow and the events of the fic happen the night before anyways. It’s a good enough excuse. Loosely based on an episode of the mid-90s BBC comedy “The Vicar of Dibley”, which I watched an inexplicable amount of as a kid for someone born after it premiered in the United States. It’s still funny.

Thanks to @snidgetsafan for her beta-ing and half the puns. She’s the best.

Enjoy, and let me know what you think!

Storybrooke, Maine has always been a little too good to be true.

After all, there isn’t really a place with an annual candle-based festival, or one where an entire town takes a lonely orphan girl under their collective wing, or one with a massive town-wide Easter egg hunt. It’s absurd. That place can’t exist.

And yet, somehow, Storybrooke does.

Emma Swan even knows the person who dresses as the Easter Bunny every year (because that’s exactly the kind of town Storybrooke is) - a lovely young lady named Mary Margaret Nolan, local fifth grade teacher and daughter of the late Leo Blanchard, the former mayor who’d originated this tradition in the first place. Mary Margaret continuing her father’s legacy, rabbit costume and all, is the least shocking of all of this - something about continuity and family tradition and other sentiments that belong in a friggin’ Hallmark movie. After all, this is Storybrooke, the only town in the world where all of this seems natural.

Mary Margaret Nolan also happens to be Emma Swan’s best friend, which is how she gets pulled into this whole mess in the first place.

“I don’t know what happened, but I’ve caught some sort of stomach bug,” she’d explained to Emma over the phone. She’d certainly sounded miserable, her voice echoing around the bathroom where undoubtedly she’d still been camped. That’s probably why Emma had agreed when Mary Margaret had begged Emma to do her a huge favor.

Unfortunately, that favor had been to dress up as the goddamn Easter Bunny to hide eggs around town.

(Personally, Emma thinks insisting she wear a costume is stupid, but Mary Margaret had been insistent.

“What if one of the kids sees you?” she’d asked, like there’d actually be school kids peeking out their windows at half past midnight. Lucky for Mary Margaret, one of the few guilt trips that still works on Emma is the prospect of disappointed kids.)

She feels ridiculous, honestly. Blatantly ridiculous. If Mary Margaret has a bug, there’s no way Emma is putting on her rabbit suit, so Emma had taken things into her own hands. Rabbit footie pajamas complete with fluffy tail and some ears on a headband is close enough, right? Especially since she’s painted whiskers and teeth on her face? Mary Margaret’s very fancy and expensive rabbit suit doubtless wouldn’t have fit anyways, since Emma is a good several inches taller. Hey, if she has to do this insane thing, at least she’s going to be comfortable.

Hiding eggs is kinda fun, Emma has to admit. It’s a bit of fun she never really got as a kid, only seeing it on TV and wishing she could do that too. She’d already been 15 by the time the Nolans had taken her in, eventually for good, and Emma had already been too old and full of teenage attitude to take part in the hunt herself, even if the residents of Storybrooke - who adopted her nearly as much as Ruth and Robert and David had - doubtless would have cheered her on if she had. It’s fun, finding clever little places to stash eggs for the older kids and easier spots that will make the littler ones feel clever, all the while hearing the rattle of coins and candy inside the plastic.

Sure, there’s a few eggs in spots Emma doesn’t remember leaving anything, but it’s half past midnight. It’s easy enough to write that off as tiredness and simple forgetfulness. Since the eggs are fake, Emma doesn’t need to keep a map of where she hides things for later. She’s the only one out doing this, anyways, and the eggs don’t look like they’ve been left outside for a year; there’s no reason to think she’s not the one who hid them.

That makes it all the more shocking to look across the town square and see another figure in full rabbit costume with a wagon full of eggs.

“What the…” she mutters, squinting as if it could somehow make the sight make sense.

Meanwhile, the other rabbit takes off their head piece - one of those massive mascot-type deals. “Swan?” they call in an accented male voice, before moving closer into her clear line of sight.

Oh shit. She knows exactly who it is: Killian Jones, local bartender and object of her lust (and possible love). And the last person Emma wants to see facing her in a rabbit suit.

Emma not wanting to see Jones has nothing to do with her own feelings; she’s willing to admit, at least to herself, that she likes Jones one hell of a lot, likes his smile and his sense of humor and that delicious accent that sends shivers chasing down her spine, even if all three are usually directed at other people. There’s been an attraction, at least on her part, ever since he moved to Storybrooke almost two and a half years ago now. No, the problem is that Jones doesn’t like her, and Emma can’t figure out why.

She’d thought it was some kind of jealousy at first, what with the way she catches him glaring whenever she interacts with other men in the bar, but it’s more than that. If she leans over the bar to try and talk to him over the noise, he groans. If they see each other in public, he offers only the briefest pleasantries before heading in the opposite direction as quickly as possible. Honestly, he seems disdainful of everything about her. The heart wants what the heart wants, though, and Emma’s never been able to quash her attraction to Killian Jones, God help her.

“What are you doing here, lass?” he asks as he approaches until he’s close enough for Emma to reach out and touch his mascot suit if she wanted too. Did Storybrooke High change its team from the Knights to the… Demon Rabbits or something? She doesn’t follow high school sports close enough to remember; all she knows is that the enormous rabbit head under Killian’s arm is freaking her out with its dead eyes and cartoonish teeth.

“What do you think I’m doing out here?” Emma shoots back, probably harsher than is needed in the situation. Maybe this is why she’s still single. “I’m hiding Easter eggs. Jesus Christ, where did you get that awful costume?”

“No,” he replies slowly, gesturing towards his ridiculous wagon. “I’m the one hiding Easter eggs. And technically, Swan, it’s already Easter, it seems pretty bold to be taking the Lord’s name in vain on Easter. But, for the record, Belle lent it to me from the drama department. The high school put on a production of Harvey last year, don’t you remember?”

“Shut up,” she mumbles. The know-it-all attitude definitely isn’t helping any of this… even if Emma hadn’t remembered that play. Musical? Whatever. “Okay, well, I don’t know why you’d be hiding eggs still, because Mary Margaret asked me to take over since she’s sick.” Emma’s getting a bit defensive about this, but she can’t actually bring herself to care.

“And David asked me for the same reason. I don’t know why you’re arguing with me about this, Swan.”

“Because you’re not supposed to be here!” she all but explodes, before reigning her emotions back in. It’s just a weird misunderstanding; there’s no reason to get mad at Killian for something that’s not his fault. Probably. “Look, just… I don’t want to be in your way, just as much as you don’t want me in your way, so you take the North end and I’ll hide stuff on the South end. Everything gets covered and you won’t have to deal with me. Fine by you?”

“That seems a bit harsh,” Killian mumbles back. Notably, he doesn’t answer her question, which Emma tries not to be pissed about. God, this man some days.

“What, the divide and conquer plan? Not sure what you’d find harsh about that.”

“No, the part where you seem to think I’m bothered by you.”

“Look, you don’t have to pretend, Killian. I know you don’t like me, and it’s fine, I’m a big girl, we’ll just stay out of each other’s hair —”

“What makes you think I don’t like you?” To his credit, Killian does look genuinely confused. That almost pisses Emma off more - this who, me? act that he’s apparently decided to put on.

“Oh please. I’d have to be blind not to see the glares and hear the groans and whatever. I’m not an idiot, I can put two and two together.”

“It’s not what you think,” Killian argues - weakly, in Emma’s opinion - turning red to his very ears.

“You go out of your way to avoid me,” she deadpans.

“Yeah, but it’s not because I don’t like you, it’s because…” Killian trails off for a moment, before muttering something unintelligible.

“I didn’t understand a single word of that,” Emma comments dryly, crossing her arms. “Try again.”

Killian sighs heavily. “Look, I really like you, alright?”

“No you don’t.” It’s a stupid thing to say, considering that he literally just told her so (and turned adorably red doing it), but it’s Emma’s knee-jerk reaction. There’s no way, right?

He scratches behind his ear - a sign Emma’s learned means he’s uncomfortable or embarrassed. Could he actually be serious? “Aye, I really do. Veering rather alarmingly towards the territory of “smitten”, if I’m quite honest.”

“But you’re always so... disapproving,” she tries to reason. “If you like me so much, why all the glaring and the groaning?”

“When do I groan?”

“Usually when I’m leaning against the bar, though I can probably come up with other examples.”

Killian laughs. It’s very much unexpected. “You’d groan too, Swan, if a lady you fancied had a habit of leaning down right in front of you and perfectly displaying all her lovely undergarments. I’m just a man, love, and that lacy black number does things to me.”

Oh. Oh. Well, she supposes that makes enough sense. Still… “Well, what about everything else? You go out of your way to avoid me, don’t pretend you don’t.”

He sighs again, a frustrated sound this time. Maybe a little sad too. “I know it doesn’t make much sense. And believe me, it wasn’t at all for lack of want. But you’re my best friend’s little sister,” he shrugs. “David can be protective, not that I blame him. I’m sure I’d be the same if I had a younger sister. But the fact remains that I’m not too keen on him cutting my balls off over this, especially since it’s so one-sided.”

That gives Emma pause for a moment. “Wait, one-sided?” she demands. “Is that what you think this is?”

“Aye,” he says, hanging his head. Rejection tinges his tone - needlessly, really, but he’s not picking up one her cues in the least. “Which is fine, Swan, I’m a grown lad and my feelings are my own. I’m not asking… that is, I’d never assume you felt the same, and nothing needs to change —”

“Whoa, hold on, that’s not —” Emma cuts herself off to collect her own thoughts, running her hands along her scalp in an anxious gesture. It’s been an absolute 180 in the past few minutes where her perception of their relationship is concerned, and she feels the need to take a few moments to try and recenter herself, collect her bearings. “Fuck,” she grumbles, “this is not how I imagined this going at all.”

“How you imagined what, love?” Confusion still colors his face; that just won’t do. She’s making a total hash of this - though she’d argue that that’s kind of on him as well - but maybe there’s still a way to redeem it. It’s about the destination, not the journey, right?

(She’s pretty sure that’s not how the saying goes, but she also doesn’t care anymore.)

So she kisses him, reaches across and hauls Killian down to meet her mouth by the front of the ridiculous vest his stupid rabbit costume is wearing. It’s the only redeeming factor of the whole thing, allowing her some form of leverage.

The kiss isn’t a gentle thing. Somehow, in her mind, Emma always imagined sweeping instrumentals as her and Killian’s lips brushed, hands stealing tentatively into hair and across cheeks. This is… not that. There’s a lot of tongue and a bit of teeth (mostly on her part) and honestly, the word she’s looking for to describe this is probably closest to devour. After waiting so goddamn long there just doesn’t seem to be a point in taking it slow; instead, she’d rather try to make up for every missed second, all at once. Not that Killian seems opposed to it. Rather, he seems determined to pull Emma as close as humanly possible, like if she’s just plastered tight enough to his front he can feel her through his ridiculous bulky rabbit suit.

Eventually, the franticness starts to settle into something easier, tongues giving way to lips, nipping giving way to sucking. They’ve finally perfected the angle too, noses just barely brushing as their mouths meet. Emma’s hands have settled on his chest, faux-furred as it is, and Killian’s have begun to creep down from her hips towards her ass. After his talk about being tormented by the sightline down her shirt, Emma would have figured he was a boob man, but hey, she’s not opposed to this development either…

Until he reaches the stupid fluffball on the seat of her pants and pulls.

Emma jerks back at that. “Did you just tweak my tail?” she demands, staring at him incredulously.

“Couldn’t help myself, love,” he teases, dropping a little kiss on her nose. “You make a bloody cute Easter Bunny.”

“Oh my God, file that under ‘things I never want to hear again’,” Emma groans, but she’s smiling too. It’s hard not to, now that she gets to enjoy his playful side. “C’mon, we’ve got to finish hiding these eggs… but maybe you can come back to my burrow afterwards.” She even throws in a wink for good measure, now that there’s no reason they can’t have a little fun.

“I’m holding you to that, love,” he says, crossing back to his wagon as Emma collects her own fabric grocery sack full of eggs. Once they’re both collected again, his terrifying rabbit head perched in the wagon’s bucket, Killian offers his free pawto her. “Shall we?”

“Yeah, alright.”

They’ve barely started walking again before the realization hits Emma, making her groan.

“What is it, love?” Killian asks, his voice full of concern.

“Nothing to worry about, not really,” she quickly clarified. “I just realized… if this is Mary Margaret and David’s idea of a set up, I’m going to kill them.”

Killian laughs uproariously at that, slinging an arm around her shoulders. “Ah, well, all’s well that ends well, right?”

(As it turns out, no one really believes Mary Margaret when she tries to claim that this is exactly what she had planned all along. Distraction induced by morning sickness is much more believable, after all, than setting up two people to fall in love as the Easter Bunnies.)

(Emma and Killian are a little too busy doing some other things like rabbits to care too much.)

[brianmayswifey]

Request: Could you do a oneshot where the female reader and Brian are visiting Brian's parents and Bri's mother is showing the reader embarrassing pictures of baby Brian and he gets all shy and blushes like mad? Thanks in advance ♥

UHMMM THIS IS SOOO CUTE! Maybe this story is not as good as you’re expecting because I’m not that good at writing fluff but I really tried hard! It took long becaaaussee I wasn’t in the mood for writing for days but here it is!

Warnings: kinda sad in the end, fluff

“We’ll be there in an hour.”, Brian told his mother on the phone. He was nodding while smiling, very excited of what’s about to happen tonight. “Okay, Mum. I love you too.”, he put the telephone back down and walked fast towards you.

“They’re excited, love! I told you not to worry about it.”, he says, running his warm hand on your neck down to your shoulder. He looked at you from head to toe and his smile grew wider. “Look at you! You look wonderful, you’re amazing!” He kissed you gently on your temple. You gave him a fake smile. “What if they don’t?”

Brian frowned a bit. “They’ll love you as much as I do. You look absolutely stunning, darling. And not just that! You have a beautiful heart too. I know they’ll see that too. You’re not just gorgeous. You’re perfect, baby.” He smiles at you as he fixed your dress’s neckline, which was a bit revealing. “These are mine, I don’t want anyone looking at it.”, he chuckled as he was pulling it upwards. You giggled, “I’m sorry it was the nicest dress I could find.” He smiled at you. “Remember baby, you’re absolutely amazing and they’ll love you.”, you nodded and smiled at him. He leaned down to kiss you on your lips. You rested your arms on his shoulder, around his neck and his hands were down your waist. “I love you, Y/N.”, he whispered into your mouth. His breath smelled like mint. You smiled before replying, “I love you too, Brian.”

You looked at the mirror once more before spraying on the perfume Brian gave you as a gift on your second month as a couple. It smelled like candy, something sweet, which Brian believes matches your personality. You turned to your boyfriend who looked very handsome in his white button down shirt and black pants and of course, his favourite pair of clogs. His curls are very majestic which adds to his attractive face. He had a perfect face structure and breathtaking facial features that makes you want to stare even longer and it automatically melts your heart. “You ready?”, he asks grabbing your bag and handing it to you. You nodded while smiling. The way he assured you and talked to you earlier had boosted your confidence a lot.

——————

“You know, I find it really cute that we’re both wearing white, Y/N.” He glanced at you quickly and put his hand on yours while the other one was on the steering wheel. He gotta make sure his girlfriend is safe. The warmth of his hands reminded you of how loving he is as a boyfriend. You are just almost five months together yet it feels like forever. It feels like you were already married by the way he showed you his love. You fully trust each other not just because you met four years ago but because of the way Brian makes you feel that you make his life a lot better and the way you make him feel that he’s the only man that makes you happy and confident.

You looked outside through the window and you remembered once again that you’re going to meet his parents for the first time. The nervousness, anxiety, and fear kicked in again. You kept worrying that they would hate you or something. That they might think you are not enough. The thoughts were bothering you so much that you didn’t hear what Brian was telling you.

“Love? Are you okay?”, he asks. You hear him now as he distracted you from overthinking. “Oh- oh yes, love. What were you saying?”, you stuttered as you replied. “I said we’ll go to Freddie, Roger, and Deaky’s flats first because Mum would love to see them too.”, he smiled as you nodded, mouth agape, obviously out of your mind. “Honestly, you okay?”, he asked once again for confirmation. “You look tensed.”, he continued. You didn’t respond nor look at him. “Babe, I told you you are an amazing woman and they’ll love you. There’s nothing to be worried about. I told them stories about how you take care of me when you visit my flat. And they smile when they see my face light up.”, you felt your confidence boost up again as he said that. There was concern on his face but you don’t like seeing it so you held his hand tighter and replied. “I’ll try my best to calm myself, love.” He took your hand and kissed it.

As you picked up the boys, the trip started to become kinda noisy. Roger was teasing you for being too nervous while the three were trying to make you feel better.

——————

As you got to the May’s house, your heart started to beat faster. You tried to catch some breath while Freddie was tapping on your shoulder, trying to calm you down. “Darling, they are amazing and welcoming parents. Don’t be so scared.”, Freddie smiled at you. The boys got out of the car first while you and Brian stayed so he can talk to you for a minute. “You can do this, my love. Okay? Remember what I and Freddie said.”, he said as he held you by your cheeks. You nodded and held his hand tightly. He gave you a gentle kiss on your nose.

“I’m so excited!”, Brian said as the five of you were walking towards the house. Brian knocked and in just about ten seconds, the door opened. It was Mrs. May. She looks a lot like Brian. She looks beautiful. She immediately hugged Brian. “I missed you!”, she exclaimed. She looked at you with widened eyes. You were so nervous waiting for her to speak. “You must be Y/N!”, she smiled and opened her arms wide, inviting you for a hug. “You look absolutely pretty! Brian has good taste.” Brian looked at you with ‘I told you’ eyes. “You too, Mrs. May!”, you responded with a smile.

She gave the boys hugs. “Ah Roger, looking great as usual!”, you see Roger’s cheeks turn pink. “And Freddie and John! I missed you!”. After all those welcoming talks on the door, she finally let you in. You saw Brian’s dad by the dining table, placing all the meals and plates on there. As you see him, you notice how Brian is a mixture of his parent’s appearance. The face shape and height was from his dad and the beauty from his mum. Mr. May quickly walks towards all of you and gave Brian a hug. “Dad, Y/N, my girlfriend.”, he says proudly. You gave him a smile.

Mr. May looks at you with glistening eyes. “How beautiful you are!”, he gave you a warm hug. He turned to Brian and joked, “You inherited great taste from your mother. Ruth chose a great partner like you did.” Mrs. May hit him with her elbows. You all, chuckled. He also greeted the three boys.

They invited you to sit on the dining table. The meals looks absolutely delicious. Brian sat next to you, his parents in front of you, and Roger, Freddie, and John at either sides of the table. You all got foods for yourself and Brian spoke. “So, Y/N, this is dad and this is mum. I told you my parents’ names already and you can call them Harold and Ruth...or Dad and Mum if you’d like.”, his parents smiled and his dad responded. “Yes, you’re a part of our family now. I want you to call us ‘Dad’ and Ruth, ‘Mum’”, you nodded.

You shared stories with each other and how you two met. You can see excitement and happiness in Brian’s face as he talks about you. How sweet! Everyone was laughing at the ‘Dad jokes’ when Mrs. May stood up and went to a room, which you suppose is the living room. She came back with a thick blue book in her hands. You watched her as she opened it and giggled to herself. She pulled a picture out and handed it to you. Before you could reach her hand, Brian swatted yours. “Mum! Don’t.”, Mrs. May laughed and slapped Brian’s hand away. You looked at it and saw Brian, his young self, probably the age of thirteen, sitting at the side of a pool in his swimming brief. You and Brian looked at each other. His face was red and he was embarrassed. You bursted into a laugh which made him smile. Mrs. May handed you the whole photo album while the boys were looking at the photo she handed you earlier. “Cute, right?”, Mrs. May smiled.

And there was another one where the whole family was at the beach. Brian looked like he’s a girl though. “He was two years old that time.”, Mr. May said. You literally cannot stop smiling that your cheekbones already hurt and kind of feels numb. He was pouting his lips the whole time you all are looking at his pictures while his mum was telling stories.

You could see Brian just poking his food with the fork and not eating them. He had lost his appetite out of shame. “Mum, this is embarrassing!”, he finally spoke. “There’s nothing wrong with them, baby.”, you caressed his cheek. A few minutes later, he stood and walked away from everyone without them noticing because of how much fun they were having. At first you thought you shouldn’t follow him because it would seem rude but you felt concern. “Excuse me, would you mind me checking him for a second?” They said it was okay.

You went upstairs and looked for him. You saw a door to a room with Brian’s name written and hanging on it. You knocked. “Bri? This is Y/N.” You heard his heavy footsteps across the room towards the door. He looked down at you, his lips still pouting. He let you in and you sat on his bed. “You okay?”, you asked while rubbing his back. He didn’t respond. “Why would you think it’s embarrassing? I find them cute.”

He looked at you with sadness in his eyes. “I- I just feel embarrassed that my childhood was not as great as you had. You know, I felt sad when taking those pictures. Having no siblings to share happiness with sucks. I felt so alone and it’s not just because I look ugly on the pictures”, you interrupted, “you look cute there.” He just looked at you and continued. “But also because it doesn’t have much value...I mean my life then wasn’t that great because I had no one to share my adventures with. I have no one who can understand me by the time. Those pictures makes me remember how sad being alone is. And I don’t like seeing them anymore— or letting other people see them. Because you’re all with a huge family. Tim is your brother, Fred, Roger, and Deaky have siblings. You were all laughing at my pictures but you don’t know what was deep inside those smiles.” You felt guilt after hearing those words. You held him by his chin.

“I’m sorry, baby. I-I didn’t know you felt that way.”, he placed his hand on your cheek. “No, it’s okay, my love.” He answered and looked into your eyes. “You’re not alone, Brian. You don’t have to be alone. I’m here with you. I’ll forever be by your side. I will make you happy every second of your life. I’m your best friend. I love you.”, you assured him, making him smile. “Thank you, Y/N. I’ll do the same. I love you so much.”

You invited him to come back downstairs. As you sat down, Brian smiled at everyone, gesturing that he’s okay. Roger whispered at Brian, “I thought you were doing something illegal upstairs.” They both laughed. Brian looked at you and smiled. You placed your hand on his thigh, making him feel loved and feel comfort. He kissed you on your forehead and whispered, “I love you.”

[saltine-kakyoin]

hii for the ask game 28/29 maybe🥺 also if u have any song recs for me I could really need it i mean we all remember the wuthering heights incident 😳 anyways hope ur doing ok!! wishing u the best🤼‍♂️💕

jules!!!! howdy hey! even though i see you on the daily, i’ve missed you!!! 🥺🥺🥺 thank you for sending these in! i ended up writing quite a bit, so i’m putting this under a readmore! ^^

28. Name a book you don’t mind reading over and over.

oh man, this is a tough one bc it’s been so long since i’ve Read a book ;w; one book that I remember thoroughly enjoying in high school and wishing I could read again (every month i flip-flop about whether or not to order it haha) is A Tale for the Time Being by Ruth Ozeki! I don’t remember it super well anymore, but I recall it really opening sophomore Sarah’s eyes to many things. if you’re interested in checking it out, I would just advise caution bc I do recall it discussing suicide

29. Do you collect anything? And what are some hobbies you have?

so i already answered this one BUT i realized i forgot things! alongside plushies and score-books, I also collect the programs from my performances + any shows I’ve gone to see, alongside any ticket stubs I may have received from those! i keep thing in a big ole binder- I actually had to move them all to a new binder a few years ago because there were too many qwq I also like collecting sheet music for the songs I’ve performed, but I haven’t ordered any new sheet music in a long time ^^;

i also wanted to elaborate on the asmr thing, bc some people read that and go 🤢👉🤢👉🤢👉 mic-licker! but that’s the not asmr i want to make! (when i originally posted this i was typing WAY too fast and completely missed typing ‘not’... pls know i am not that kind of gal ;o;) The asmr I really want to create one day would kind of be similar to the content from Goodnight Moon and ATMOSPHERE: really story-driven and detail-oriented! i also want to incorporate aspects of Latte’s style, where she’ll jump to a close-up shot for certain actions (ie pouring a cup of tea), and Dana’s style with all the special effects! i think it’d be such a fun way to explore Foley artistry and work on my acting skills, but i’ve always been too shy to start recording 🙈🙈

as for song recs.....bro i feel like the one girl at the party w the beam coming out of her, i always get so PUMPED when we share songs!!! (never forget the wuthering heights incident 😳😳) here are my recs!

I’m Not Calling You a Liar by Florence and the Machine!! admittedly, i heard the dragon age 2 version of this song before i heard the actual version, and it is gorgeous too, don’t get me wrong!!! but i personally prefer the original instrumentation more uwu

Fool’s Errand by Fleet Foxes- jules i am DEEP in the throes of my fleet foxes addiction and this song has me in a mfin chokehold.. i love this song so so much, i love how the singer’s voice just soars during the chorus. another song i really enjoy from fleet foxes is I Am All That I Need / Arroyo Seco / Thumbprint Scar, which ouughhh it makes me so sad. I listen to it a lot when thinking about my DA2 player character ;_;

Feet of Clay by Vashti Bunyan- i recently discovered vashti’s songs and oHH they all hit me emotionally T T this one makes me feel many many things, and I’d love to dance to this song if/when i get married someday 🥺 i also love if i were/ same but different, which is a much sadder duo

Locket by Crumb- this song is a bit repetitive and 1000% an earworm kinda song, but god the instrumentation is SO good

Television Romance by Pale Waves- okay so frfr i originally decided to listen to this song bc i thought that the vocalist was hot umu;; however, it’s really catchy too!! I like that the lyrics kind of run counter to the sound of the song, and I really enjoyed the wistful, almost regretful?? or maybe resenting?? expressions the singer pulls between the choruses and verses

The Machinist by Japanese Breakfast- so i’m sure you’ve probably already heard this considering you introduced me to japanese breakfast, but!!! i’m recommending it anyways bc i have been JAMMING to this song lately... when the song goes ‘it could be bliss’ i’m like bRO IT IS BLISS ;_;

Need Your Love by Tennis- this was the first song i ever heard from them, but I really like their sound! the ‘baby you’ve got more poison than sugar’ section is SO fucking good, oh my goddd

Waltz Me to the Grave by Kimbra- i will love kimbra’s entire discography until i die, but god this song has always been really dear to me. I listened to this SO much when I was trying to rewrite nge so that basically everyone lived (ikik, i was like 14 ;__;), and it has kind of lingered in my head every since. i love the instrumentation through the middle of the sing, that shit SLAPS in the dark at 2:23am.. some other faves from her are the build up, 90′s music, like they do on the tv, and version of me! but every song from her is so so good i honestly recommend them all

Stone by Raveena! every single raveena song is the best song in existence, but this one.... ooh it hurts ;__; i originally listened to this song as inspiration for one of my characters, but i’ve really been relating to it more personally lately. Raveena’s entire Lucid album is *chef kiss* if NOT *chef marriage*, but I also really love Headaches, If Only, Sweet Time, and Temptation!

Valentino by FKA Twigs- so this is actually Mary Magdalene, Cellophane, and Home With You, but the specific way they’ve been blended for this fashion show is TRANSCENDENT!!! I’ve loved Twigs’ music for so many years now, but her entire Magdalene album is such a new and interesting development for her already kind of abstract sound to take, and I’m a huge fan! c: daybed wasn’t featured in the fashion show, but it’s another one of my favorites from this album!

this last one is like... a Bonus and also Not An Actual Song, but JULES my brother and i heard it and IMMEDIATELY started crying, it’s the funniest thing i’ve heard in a long time. if you’re in need of hysterical laughter, pls give Monkey Type Beat a listen ;w;

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2010s: 75 - 71

75. Valentina Monetta - “Crisalide (Vola)” San Marino 2013

The middle chapter of one of Eurovision’s most epic saga’s. God, I may be an insane book nerd for looking for ~THE BEST STORY~ every year, but Valentina had one forreal and it was legit a great one. While the first chapter established Valentina as a universally beloved backstage darling, and the third rewarded her previous struggles with a spot in the finale, it’s the second that I hold dear the most: It put Valentina on the mark as an artist who mattered. Like a butterfly emerging from chrysalis, if you will? 🦋

Needless to say, it comes down to Valentina’s song, which is again, one of the better Siegel compositions: “Crisalide” has all I need in my Eurovision anthems: emotional imput, a great beat (made to resemble an irl heartbeat), a eurofriendly message about spreading wings and flying away, topped off with a KILLER KEY CHANGE. Like, this moment:

is one of spine-shivers. What a great entry. My 2013 self was DEVASTATED when she NQd, but my 2019 self is thrilled Valentina got to return and write history as Stan Marino’s first qualifier.  🦋 ALL HAIL THE LEGEND THAT IS VALENTINA MONETTA! 🦋 VOLA! INSIEME A MEEEEEEEEE 🦋

And that concludes San Marino! It’s pretty weird that I’m usually into “STANNING SHIT FOR THE SHITTINESS” movement, because San Marino is a country formed AROUND being deliberately bad. However, intentional humour is very often less funny than unintentional humour and because of this I find it very hard to get into the San Marinese shitfests. They’re capable of greatness though, and hopefully can capitalize on Serhat’s qualification to serve us some delicious campness in the future. 

________________________________________________________________

74. Greta Salóme - “Hear them calling” Iceland 2016

ANOTHER gut-twisting NQ. 😭 To be fair, I can sort of understand why Greta 2.0 flopped? The act is very similar to Sergey’s, but not as eye-catching, and the lighting is a bit too dark, making it dificult to connect with her.

However, having said that... what a STUPID reason to NQ one of the best songs in 2016 o__O. “Hear them calling” is a great song: It has a truly haunting atmosphere, a visually stunning act and infectuous melody. The only wish I have is that Greta had stuck to the Icelandic version though because that one is even more epic. 

Another thing I really like about “Hear them calling” is, well, Greta herself. I think she’s one of the most talented Eurovision songwriters, consistently churning out magical music, but at the same time is held back as a performer by her stagefright. Seeing her overcome it and ~blossom~ into a murder of crows the confident woman she deserves to be makes me feel warm and fuzzy on the inside. BRING HER BACK (as a songwriter lol).

And with Greta’s elimination, HATARI are now the sole Icelandic rep standing. Love has won!

________________________________________________________________

73. Miki - “La venda” Spain 2019

LMFAO it truly was a crazy ride with Miki. When “La Venda” was first selected, it was a massive burst of uncoordinated positive energy, in desperate need of taming. A revamp polished off all the raw edges, pre-packaging it for greatness. “So it happens” BorisBubbles thought, taking an indifferent sip of cold coffee from a bone china mug. “Spain are going to break their flop streak :slurp:” 

Silly me, I had completely forgotten that, oh hello, this is fucking SPAIN and Spain doesn’t *do* competent whoops. Thank fuck they went all out with “La venda’s” staging because the results were fucking GLORIOUS. From the giant manikin rocking the dollhouse

over the go-pro,

to the technicolour explosions,

"La venda” sent a pyroclastic flow of party energy all over Europe, covering our faces with celebratory soot when we didn’t expect it. This... was fucking AWESOME though, because the eruption of Mount-St.-Nuñez was one of unbridled fun, but it also overloaded the maximum capacity of ownage energy, which short-circuited the jurors.😭 May next year’s jurors grow themselves a stronger tolerance for kickassness.😭 Nevertheless, Miki and his friends capped this decent Grand Final off in great style, turning what was a fun competent reggaeton into an EXPERIENCE. 

That leaves RUTH as highest ranked Spanish entry:

“SOY YO? SOY YO??” -“RUTH!” -“AAAAAAA!!!!!”

________________________________________________________________

72.  András Kállay-Saunders - “Running” Hungary 2014

SHE CALLS PHARRELL, SHE CALLS PHARRELL, BUT NO ONE SEEMS TO CARE.

I will just plunge into this write-up in medias res because “Running” is one of those songs that feels like the “perfect” Eurovision entry on many levels. It’s a great example of a dark, contemporary hit single that would hit the charts on its own. 

It also tackles the issue of child abuse with grace and elegance, addressing the topic head-on, but NEVER trivializing it. This PSA is supported by András who makes for a very convincing narrator and a sublime dance act portrayed where the pain and terror is portrayed with harrowing accuracy.

Which brings me to why I’m booting it now, and not like, in the top 20. “Running” suffers from the fact that it is *too effective*. I think that, on an academic level, "Running” is probably one of the ten best entries in this decade. On a practical level however, “Running” is still an entry that gut-punches me into contemplative silence, but... it’s also very serious, distubring and saddening at the same time. It does not have the same level of replayability or likability that the upper tier Eurovision entries do. Ergo, I have to boot it now. bye. 

________________________________________________________________

71.  Sofia Nizharadze - “Shine” Georgia 2010

“Shine” was one of my intensely random faves back in 2010, so there is a lot of nostalgia resonating in dragging it this high. With that caveat out of the way though, I will say the deal is very similar to that of “Running”. Like, “Running”, “Shine” feels like a ‘perfect’ entry on an academic level. Like “Running”, it is kind of lacking on a connection level despite getting everything right. However, unlike “Running” it has a lot of heart seeping through the performance. Yes, Sopho is a notorious “slrrer vf wrds” 😍 which is just the endearment I needed.

You see, “Shine” may be a generic love ballad, pleasant and little else, but I actually think the act is the real showstopper. I could watch Sopho getting flung around for hours and never get bored. LK THE TDS GNA TRN YO ANOW

NNNNNNNNN BT ITS CLLLLLLD. 

YR LL N YR WN BT YR NVR UH-LNNNNNNNNNNNN!!

SHYNNN SHYNNN LK D STRZ N D SKYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

100% deserving of being the best scoring Georgian act in Eurovision!!! But not this ranking because “Midnight Gold” is not of this fucking planet. Congratulations Nikangel Kocharov!!

[amwritingmeta]

MCM Comic Con London

Heyyyy, my loves!

I went to my first ever Comic Con on Sunday. I know! First ever?? How could this be? What did you make of it? Did you hug a Storm Trooper? Did you get lost in this huge enormous vast building with huge enormous vast rooms filled with huge enormous vast groups of people? Did you pet the TARDIS? Did you meet RAPUNZEL? DID YOU SEE DEADPOOL?? DARTH VADER?? Did you make a friend? Did you dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?? Do tell!!

Alrighty, then! (I’m afraid I’m going to prove a huuuuuge disappointment) (but there’s Misha panel commentary further down m’kay?)

So, here’s what I learned about myself from visiting Comic Con: I like small, intimate spaces with assigned seating.

Yeah. I know. Told you that you’d be disappointed. 

It’s basically why I haven’t been to Comic Con before tbh. I knew I’d enjoy milling about and looking at merchandise and graphic novels and oh the fan art and seeing the TARDIS (I did see her but I did not pet her) and R2D2 (he moved around and talked to people and everything) *feelings* and passing Darth Vader in the hallway (true story) and just being in a space filled with people nerding out together like YES. My heart was very full. 

But.

(oh here it comes)

My nerdy heart is pretty much sequestered by SPN. While I enjoy the original Star Wars very, very much because epic (obviously) and have enjoyed Doctor Who (on and off) and while I’m a big GoT fan (yes I shall remain so thanks to the books never mind what they did on those final two episodes of the show but also do not get me starts on what they fucking even DID) and I fucking love Disney and anime and animation of any kind, and have a huge respect and interest for the artistry of graphic noveling, that’s just not my world. 

(I do want to start reading graphic novels though and I’ve been so close to ordering the BtVS ones but... anyone have solid suggestions or advice on where to start, hit me up in DM) (I’ve read a few where the art has been unspeakably gorgeous and just mh!)

But because I’m not deep in anything even approaching a multi-fandom attitude, they just don’t grab at me, you know?

So though I’m so fucking happy that I went - truly am (and nope I did not dress up and though I know I’d enjoy it because who wouldn’t enjoy dressing up as Kahlan from Legend of the Seeker? End of the day, the dressing up is more fun when going with a group of people...) (anyway) - it’s not quite my cuppa. That being said, if Misha comes again next year *dirty* then I’m there. I mean, it’s one tube ride from my place. How the fuck could I not? 

Okay, before those three sentences make me say things I’ll regret in the morning, let’s talk about The Panel!

I’m actually going to open with something that Misha kind of threw out there in the middle of the panel because it made me so excited: he may direct in S15! Ahahahah yes please! I really hope he gets to!

Now, what else?

Highlights for me were:

Him talking about the fandom in his warmest tones, which is something he does on the regular, but he spoke of the positivity of the intensity of our community and how he thinks it’s been really cool to be a part of it and to do charitable work together (hundreds of thousands of volunteer hours and millions of dollars into worthy causes over the years, so kudos, guys, kudos) It’s a wonderful, surreal phenomenon. *his words* *and so very true* (and we all know this is how he feels, but it’s always lovely for him to restate it)

Ruth sending a video message and prompting Misha to talk about when Amara carved the I Am Coming message into Cas’ chest (and Misha thinking Lucifer carved the message and promptly dismissing us correcting him) *snortlaugh* Has everyone heard this story? Because I actually hadn’t. That Misha was making corresponding noises and facial expression to really convey the message and the only thing was that the top brass at the CW were conducting their yearly set visit and were, in fact, standing at the monitor watching him. *MCM audience laugh track* *aw Misha*

Talking about how close the cast is and how much they enjoy JiB, and how they laugh themselves into shape in the Green Room every year. Admittedly the six pack is a lie, but the aching stomach muscles are a truth. *not jealous because the rest of us are having Just As Much Fun In Our Corner* >.>

When asked what he’ll miss most about the show: the fun they have on set and the people, including the crew, since they all know each other so well and have grown up together. But also he’ll miss the Supernatural community. He knows it won’t go away immediately, but, as these things go, it will dwindle. He’ll miss the fire and intensity that is there when the show is on the air. 

Which is fair, because there will be a dropping off, there will be a slowing down, it’s inevitable, but I honestly can’t see this family ever just dispersing entirely. And I almost wanted to get up there and suggest to him that they consider keeping the JiB torch burning, because giving this community of ours a few set points of warmth each year where people (if they so choose) get to interact with them while also getting to reunite with people we don’t otherwise get to see often and to have those points of warmth to aim for and gather around is a sure-fire way to keep the flame alive. Right? I’m not expecting them to continue doing the con circuit because omfg no, but to have one or two points a year...

Anyway.

Misha trying to do a Scottish accent makes him sound like a leprechaun with a lisp. *ehehe*

Misha telling us that the writers gave them the option to draw out the story for another two-three seasons, or land it in one kick-ass final season, and they all chose one kick-ass final season, which makes me so happy for them, that they get to finish strong and on their terms. It’s so well-deserved.

(I think I’m just going through the panel moment-by-moment at this point) (the panel was apparently the highlight)

Him talking about The Adventurous Eaters Club - the cookbook he’s writing with Vicki that I cannot wait to read, tbh, because I do believe kids often say no at the dinner table because they’re trying to stay in control of the situation, rather than them not really wanting to eat, and as a grown-up, recognising this and relenting control and allowing them free reign to be a part of building their dinner from the ground up and getting them excited about food and understanding the process of actually creating a meal is so damn healthy. Well, if that’s the objective of the cookbook! Just what I’m taking from the premise, but, hands against heart, I adore them both.

Talking about his favourite vehicles for Cas and saying that he’d love for Cas to get a smart car and squeeze Sam into the passenger seat and omfg PLEASE yes. *the imagery is so  e n t i c i n g*

Going full-meta and talking about Cas’ travails going to get the fruit of life without his wings in S13, looking up a flight on Expedia, sitting squished into the middle seat, saying no thank you to food, getting through customs with that bag of fruit, probably getting held up. (quite impressive actually because this happened more than a season ago and clearly he’s given the story gap some thought) (and he remembers) (astonishing) 

*^^^ sarcasm, guys* *sarcasm* :)

If Cas gets to be happy, he will die (my addition: unless he’s, you know, human) :P

Cas’ wings are rainbow (and I’m immediately thinking of them almost like peacock *shhhh don’t even start* feathers that shift tone in the light so that they shimmer rather than are divided up into single colour feathers in a rainbow pattern) (wow I took that seriously af) (but mh gorgeous wings!)

Maison is a goddamn rockstar. *not literally but internally* :)

Okay, so that’s the panel done. And dusted. *sparkly*

And then I met up with a friend of a friend who I’d actually met briefly at JiB - her name is Katie - and I stood in line with her as she waited for Misha autos and I met the loveliest Scottish bloke named Oliver, mostly because I desperately needed to charge my mobile and just said out loud “Does anyone have a mobile charger” and the blessed man turned around and said “Yes, I have one”, so he lent me his mobile charger and was gushing over his photo-op with Misha (it really is the most adorable photo ever) and Oliver was entirely flustered with happiness and just *my heart strings* and then he fucked off and didn’t come back for his charger! 

He just disappeared! Without as much as a by-your-leave!

So we waited. And waited. It was terrible. Having to stand there. Not knowing. Okay, kidding, but we did wait and wait and tried to look for him, but he just didn’t come back.

But just now, ten minutes ago, he followed me on Twitter!! I just accosted him going OMG IT IS YOU IS IT NOT! Do I have your charger?? And it is he and now I don’t have to have a guilty conscience anymore, though I did ease it by thinking that he was the one who literally effed the fuck off and didn’t return. Anyway. What drama, huh? Guess that’s Comic Con, for you. And I got to add the resolution! *sweet*

It was a grand old indoor day and then we went down to the river for food and lots of alcoholic really-really-tasty beverages and good company. 

The End.