#terrifying AND pretty (Arcee)

[lets-try-some-writing]

i love it when people apply the whole “humans are space orcs” idea to transformer humans.

jack, miko and raf just doing regular, average day things that make the bots both extremely worried and unsettled gives me so much brainrot.

I got you here. I love this kind of lore/reaction ask.

Each of the children have a particular habit that bothers the team more than anything else. Can it be explained? Not really. All humans do the things they do. But for the bots, it is strange and out of sorts all the same.

Miko always carries around a bottle of sparkling water. She adores the stuff. The team, despite knowing it is not what the name implies, are still horrified with her drinking habits. Not to mention, they can't help but wonder where all the liquid goes. She drinks up to three whole bottles of water a day. In her own words "Hydrate or die." That in it of itself is concerning since the team, while well aware that humans need water, do not know how much they need exactly. The team are down right terrified of her ability to down water like a dry sponge. How can such a small fleshy even consume that much? They aren't entirely sure. Not only that, but if she drinks that much, then are Jack and Rafael getting enough? They can't be.

Not only does Miko down water like a bone dry houseplant, she also drinks just about anything else too. The team have seen her chug sodas which contain Primus knows how many strange chemicals and compounds. They've observed her willingly drink things that no other would on bets, including food that has been blended and watered down just because Jack wanted to see if it was possible for her to down hotdog cafeteria milk cheeto apple slurry.

Yes the team are terrified of humans and their ability to put anything inside themselves and walk it off. But more than any other, they fear Miko. Who knows what she's consumed.

All the kids do it, but Jack is the most notable since when he needs to go to the restroom, he makes it loud and clear mainly so that someone knows to keep an eye on Miko. The team are aware that organics have a need to manually handle removing waste since their systems are rather inefficient, however there is a certain level of mysteriousness surrounding the restrooms. The bots don't want to watch or even know HOW the humans get rid of waste, but they do know that THINGS happen in the restroom that seem to either be painful, emotional, refreshing, or aggravating. No one can really be sure what reaction will follow those who enter the space. Sometimes Jack or one of the other kids will go in there seemingly to just be alone.

It is a strange and almost sacred location where strange happenings occur. Miko went in once with bloody clothes and emerged with a fresh set before Ratchet could figure out what was wrong in the first place. Jack went in once and came out an hour later looking like he'd gone to war after he convinced Arcee to let him stop and get takeout the night before. Rafael took his charger and computer in there and hogged the space for a while to get away from the others once. The team does not know what happens in there, but it is mildly concerning since it either repairs or breaks a person.

Bulkhead theorizes that its a pocket dimension like the shadow zone. Ratchet refuses to think about it. Optimus will say nothing about whatever he knows. Arcee and Bee assume its a safe haven or sorts and Wheeljack is almost certain they keep weapons in there. Ultra Magnus and Smokescreen both agree that the restroom is simply a quiet space where a human can deal with personal issues in peace.

No bot is willing to try and confirm anything since humans flip out at any attempts to view the supposedly sacred ground.

Rafael is generally pretty good about flying under the radar most of the time, but he has a habit that has caught the team's attention. Humans have been noted doing what they can to clean themselves on their own. Its rather ineffective to clean one's own venting openings with digits considering the sheer amount of germs involved, but it is not out of the question to do so when a cleaning cloth is not available. Rafael occasionally and quietly trying to clean his nose is not what bothers the team.

No what horrifies them is the goop that he pulls out after his attempt at cleaning. What Ratchet has studied states that the goop is referred to by a number names, but is commonly called snot. Its the natural germ catcher humans have, but it still unsettles the team whenever Rafael quietly blows a few or when one of the others grabs a tissue and makes a rather disgusting sound as they try to clear their airways.

The goop reminds the team of any number of horrible things. But the sheer amount of GROSS within a small amount of the stuff has left the team all gagging whenever they find the stuff around base. Rafael is usually good about being clean, but sometimes he gets lazy and will use his chair to hide his cleaning attempts. Bumblebee has almost purged a few times seeing the marks on the chair from where Rafael may or may not have wiped his fingers.

Is he twelve? Yes. Is he fully mature? No. That much is evident just by looking at his chair.

[lockheed-martin-unofficial]

Thinking about Altmodes.

The fact that cybertronians even have the ability to “scan” vehicles (created by other alien species) tells me that they’ve always not only been aware of other intelligent species, but also possibly interacted with them. They were designed to interact with them that way, assuming scanning was an ability Primus gave them and not an extra gadget they added into their frames afterwards (Which is also an interesting concept) But maybe that interaction only went one way.

Taking the catchphrase Robots In Disguise™️ seriously, it is easy to imagine cybertronians being a horror story for other species. Aliens that hide in plain sight, lying in wait. Indistinguishable from the very vehicles you use to travel around. Would you trust your car, be sure it wasn’t replaced? Cybertronians would be TERRIFYING if they wanted to conquer your planet from the shadows.

On another note, I like to imagine there’s More Than Meets The Eye™️ to scanning altmodes. It’s not just to hide. Take TFP for an example. Neither Airachnid nor Dreadwing/Skyquake transformed before scanning an altmode even though they were in situations where doing so would have greatly helped them. This was probably an animation thing, the people making the show not having the time and budget to design two seperate altmodes for the characters.

However, if we read into it, I think it’d make sense that the true reason they scan earth-based altmodes is that their cybertronian altmodes are not fully compatible with earth. Or at least they don’t know how compatible they would be so instead of risking they wait to scan an earth-based form. Especially when it comes to flyers. The atmosphere, the gases in it, the gravity, all work a whole lot differently on other planets. It’s more advantageous to become something that was built to maneuver on this planet, than trying your chances with your cybertronian altmode and seeing how it fares in this unfamiliar environment, while also in the middle of a battle.

The Autobots specifically mention to Wheeljack and Smokescreen that they needed an earth-based altmode for disguise purposes, so we know they could have probably transformed this entire time but simply chose not to out of convenience.

They would probably not be able to go back to their earth-based altmodes again without scanning if they reverted to their cybertronian ones, which is why they don’t when they go to Cybertron. I also imagine the process of un-scanning an altmode (dunno what else to call that) would take a while, so if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.

In episode where Arcee and Jack go to Cybertron, she’s gonna come back in a few hours so why would she go through the trouble? In the movie, they don’t really have a reason/motivation to do so. The Autobots probably want a reminder of Earth, Decepticons like Shockwave and Megatron already have cybertronian altmodes. I don’t think we see Knockout transform but he’s always been very vocal about how pretty he is as a car so he probably kept his altmode as well.

That leaves only Starscream to be explained, and my personal headcanon is that he secretly grew to like human-made aircraft. Although it would’ve been cool to see him as a cybertronian jet in the movie, the movie scriptwriters didn’t really care about Starscream anyway.

In my AU the earthplane enjoyment is in part due to him bonding with Nicole and pitying all the trouble humans have to go through to achieve what comes to him naturally.

[dragqueenstarscream]

tfp starscream is a tricky character to write when giving him a redemption arc because you've gotta remember that this guy is still an asshole who doesn't trust anyone, and old habits die hard.

like, he has no reason to trust anyone among the decepticons, because almost everyone is out for themselves. he can't trust the autobots because... yeah, they're autobots, they're his ideological enemy, not to mention he's pretty sure that arcee would tear him apart on sight after what starscream did to cliffjumper. optimus is the only one willing to give him a shot, but optimus is also top autobot, and that's terrifying. him going rogue was really his only viable option to get away from megatron until he got his hands on the omega keys and had proper leverage over megatron (until shockwave showed up).

if you're gonna write starscream having a redemption arc, then you've gotta remember that he's still starscream, he still doesn't trust anyone, and he likely won't trust anyone for a long time. it's a tough balance, but it's so much fun to write when done well.

[gl1tt3r-gutz-and-r0b0tz-sl]

Do you like the idea of Elita being in the transformers one movie?

Also i like ur art!

Yeah! I like it. In my opinion, based on my own fan continuity, I would like Optimus and Megatron split apart because of betrayal, not a girl. Now, I know no one has done that, but I really don't hope that's where it goes. I think it would gut punch me if Megatron felt betrayed and out of place because he was different, being the reason he was jealous or something.

Elita is badass and I love her, but I really do hope she doesn't replace Arcee's whole shtick as a whole. I love both girls. They're so pretty, and I'm lowkey terrified of them also, but I just hope that Arcee gets introduced at least once later on.

Also, thank you for the compliment!

[blueikeproductions]

On the topic of EarthSpark factions, let’s also consider the Autobots.

Hasbro, understandably, wants to mostly use characters who sell so Optimus, Arcee, Bumblebee & Grimlock tend to be the Autobots primarily used the most in things. Lately Wheeljack and Elita-1 have become more common fixtures, and while it’s preferable to have Elita get a chance in the spotlight again over the somewhat forced Windblade and Pyra Magna back in the IDW days, it’s still a big symptom of modern storytelling. The insistence to use the same five or so Autobots over and over again is proving to be stale. It wasn’t THAT long ago we had a more varied cast but there’s only so much you can do with the same five guys and gals over and over again without completely rewriting them (Arcee being a particular stand out due to Prime and IDW).

Like the Decepticons, it feels like the Autobot cast in EarthSpark is miscast.

For instance, if GHOST is meant to be part of human relations anyway, shouldn’t some of the Autobots be public service vehicles? This show is Rescue Bots for Teens, own up to it, man!

Like where’s Inferno & Red Alert?

While never really depicted as a gay couple before, if you want an organic relationship, these two are it. It wouldn’t take much to pivot these two into being husbands. Plus, Red Alert’s paranoia could easily (and rightfully in some cases) played off against Megatron and other GHOST aligned Decepticons.

Human/TF romance is also something that could be played up with Powerglide and Sea Spray.

Powerglide for the aerial recon and support (it’s not like they do anything with Wheeljack’s drones in show anyway) with Astoria being his semi eccentric co-pilot and one of the rich sponsors that helps fund GHOST.

Alanna and Sea Spray I had it were part of GHOST, who research aquatic areas of interest related to the Decepticons.

Tow-Line! A personal fav of the RiD01 Autobots. Still following his No Parking! mantra, he’s mostly comic relief towing away Decepticons, Terrans and fellow GHOST operatives who park irregularly.

Quickshadow! Pretty much a straight transplant of her Rescue Bots self, and the straight woman to a lot of the antics of the Terrans and her teammates. Notably she’s the only Rescue Bots Autobot to make the leap to the big kids table in this scenario.

Smokescreen! I see him as a hybrid of his Prime and G1 self. Young and impulsive, but having a bit of a smoking problem which is useful for confusing Decepticons. Hes largely kept in check by Quickshadow and his human partner Jack Darby.

Strongarm! Transplant of her RiD15 self, slightly less rigid but no less by the books. She’s in on the Terrans, and drops by the Maltos to teach them what she knows of what it means to be an upstanding Robot in Disguise. The bit with her and the Terrans is a toned down version of IDW Tailgate being taught by the fastidious IDW Ultra Magnus about the Autobot code.

(Frankly I’m terrified Prowl’s upcoming role as of typing will make him an ACAB type due to IDW and current events, so Strongarm is my choice of having a competent cop that’s doing what’s she’s supposed to be doing.)

And to round us out: Grapple. The artsy fartsy type of the GHOST Autobots who leads reconstruction efforts with a squad of other construction themed Transformers like Bulkhead, Quickmix & the Constructicons. Very detail oriented and a perfectionist, buildings MUST be up to his standards to the letter. Grapple, Jawbreaker & Thrash tend to be played off in work/play scenarios where they learn from each other.

I do understand that the Terrans are meant o be the standouts and the Decepticons, due to favoritism, are getting the oddballs, but it bothers me that the GHOST aligned Autobots especially feels like an afterthought (because in a fashion they kinda were…).

[neonpaperlanterns]

Sometimes I worry that I would forget to mark anonymous one day and just... lose the magic that makes me, Sunny anon... Just wanted to air that out.

Transformers prime thought. Do you think it'd be interesting if a vehicon or two (I think I spelled that right) defected to the autobots? Like... they finally have a flyer-type ally, but said ally is terrified of them because of just what they have done to other vehicons. Given that they all essentially look like clones. I'm going with them being clones. Which means that Buckhead could tear out their insides like in one of the first episodes of TFP. And anyone minus a human could easily tear them apart too.

Maybe they end up having a interaction with one of the autobots, shouting that they are more than just a clone of a con. And this flyer can't really fly solo. Starscream did that and he pretty much barely survived, lost his Tgog. Granted, Starscream shares the survivalability of a roach. But still, that just adds to the reason this defector would stay with the autobots. They are a clone of someone who isn't that durable Cybertronian-wise. The Jack of all trades, can dish out some damage and can take some.

I imagine it'd be real awkward (and hurtful) whenever someone starts stating how many cons they scrapped like it was a high score in some game... Vehicons need some love.

-Sunny Anon

[A/n: If you forgot to put it as anonymous I would screenshot the ask and crop out the username so I could still answer it but delete the original ask. You username would slip from my mind like what I had for breakfast.]

Stand Up

They were doing it again. Boasting about how many Cons they were able to offline. Bumblebee with 22, Smokescreen at 16, Arcee with 24, Bulkhead with 26, and coming in first was Wheeljack with 150. The Bots were arguing that it shouldn't count if there were bombs involved. Sighting it wasn't really Wheeljack who took them out.

Finch curled his servos, digits digging into the metal as they carried on. Oblivious of the other two occupants in the room. BlueJay wanted to leave, wings turned down and their field pulled in tight around them as they urged the other vehicon to come with them. But they were doing it again and Finch was so tired of hearing how proud they were.

He felt like they didn't matter. Like they were back on the Nemesis. Just disposable clones meant for nothing more than to die fighting a war they did not get to choose.

And he has had enough!

"Do you think this is a game!?" He heard himself shout. BlueJay flinched but didn't let go of him.

"Do we matter so little that you can stand around arguing about whether bombs count as if you didn't just murder a couple hundred other Cybertronians?" He asked them, genuinely curious but not caring for an answer right now.

"Fin-" He stopped Bulkhead before he could even begin.

"No I'm not done!" Finch slammed his pede into the floor. "It hurts the way you talk about killing us. How unbothered you are but I remember the remorse that was felt over Skyquake or the concern you-" He stabs a digit at Bulkhead "Felt about what happened to Breakdown." He felt BlueJay's grip tighten, the plating denting just a little as they took in a shaky ex-vent.

"It's like you care more about them than us." BlueJay spoke quietly but the silence that deafened the room assured that everyone heard them.

"Do you not view us as equal to the likes of Breakdown and the others? Are we less in your optics?" Their voice wavered and filled with static near the end.

There was a beat where nothing happened. No one moved, no one made a sound.

Then suddenly all the Bots were talking. Their words falling over each other as they defended themselves. As they apologized. As they reassured. But Finch didn't want to hear it. Not right now. Not when it felt forced. He threaded his digits through BlueJay's and stormed out of the room. They were being followed but it didn't matter. The Bots couldn't follow them up into the clouds.

[rowiewritesstuff]

TFP/RID2015 Yandere Soundwave X Reader

TW: Death, Gore, Violence, Kidnapping, Mind Break

Pretty fucked up tbh

Bumblebee was your guardian. One day on a mission, Soundwave snatched you up. Apparently, he’d been watching you for a while- he found you interesting for whatever reason.

Time passed. Everyday, you hoped for rescue. Surely they’d find the ship and find you, right? 

You were trapped on the Nemesis for a year. You didn’t know that, however. On a ship like this one, time seemed to phase together. Soundwave kept you with him 24/7. Eating, sleeping, reading- showering. No matter where you went, you’d be under surveillance. It was so uncomfortable, and for a long time you tried to avoid the cameras. Everytime you did, Soundwave would just place more. Eventually, you gave up. 

There were times you’d try to escape. Soundwave didn’t like that much. The first time, he squeezed you slightly in warning. He clipped together audio clips that gave you a warning you wouldn’t forget.

The second time you attempted to escape, he broke your leg. The blank visor he wore stared into your face as he watched your pained expression, making sure to record every second of it. He made sure to take you to Knockout right after, though. 

The third attempt to escape was your last. You were far too terrified and traumatized to attempt again after that. Soundwave was out on a mission, and you decided to sneak out of the room. The Vehicons somehow missed you, and you ran through the open groundbridge. 

There you saw your friends- the Autobots. “Arcee!” You shouted at her. You realize your mistake a moment after as many Decepticons and Autobots alike turned to you. As soon as you saw Soundwave’s visor looking at you, you knew you were in for it. 

He pointed to the ground bridge behind you- he was giving you an out. A last chance or else you’d be punished. You knew what you should have done. The route that would have saved you a lot of pain down the line. You did the opposite of what your brain told you to do, however, and ran to the nearest Autobot- Wheeljack.

Wheeljack quickly scooped you up in his servos and transformed into vehicle mode. Within seconds you both were retreating into the tall trees. “Wheeljack to base, open a bridge! Now!” 

Something huge landed on the ground in front of Wheeljack, making him swerve into a tree. You groaned as your head slammed into the window. Wheeljack transformed and threw you to the side and you realized just what the object was.

You looked on in fear as Soundwave began fighting Wheeljack. It was brutal. Energon was leaking from both of them, but eventually Soundwave overpowered the wrecker. Soundwave’s pede stood on his head, and he gazed over at you. He was making sure you were watching. A digit was pointed in your direction, and then back to Wheeljack. He was telling you that it was your fault, without speaking. You did this to Wheeljack.

“Kid…” Energon leaked from Wheeljack’s intake. “Run. Run… now.” 

Your legs shook as you stood there, back pressed into a tree. Soundwave looked at you to see what you’d do. Your legs moved slowly, as if to run. Soundwave then electrocuted Wheeljack. 

Wheeljack’s screams of pain were enough to make you run up to Soundwave and try (uselessly) to push him off. “Please, Soundwave! I-I’m sorry! I won’t run again!” 

Soundwave picked you up with one tentacle and pointed again to Wheeljack. He wanted you to watch, and if you didn’t your punishment would be worse. You were forced to watch as Soundwave ripped off Wheeljack’s arms. Nothing could be heard but screaming and metal crunching. Wheeljack’s screams would haunt you for the rest of your life. 

When Soundwave was finished, Wheeljack was limbless. Energon leaked freely from his frame. All you could get out at the sight was whimpers. You were shaking in fear and your throat was raw from the screams you’d let out previously. 

Soundwave left Wheeljack’s body on the ground and opened a bridge. Right as you were being taken through, you managed to whisper out an apology to the beaten mech. Somehow, Wheeljack managed to nod weakly at you. He was trying to reassure you that it wasn’t your fault- but you knew it was.

After that day, you never tried to escape. Your life as you knew it was gone. There was nothing but fear and numbness. 

Soon enough, the Autobots raided the ship. Miko was in the Apex Armor and she grabbed you up from Soundwave. When he tried to grab you back, another groundbridge opened. He was gone. 

The Autobots didn’t stay very long after that. Everyone (except Ratchet) left to go back to the now revived Cybertron. You tried to go back to normal life, but it was so hard. The trauma you faced at Soundwave’s hand left you damaged. Ratchet chose to watch over you. He didn’t trust that you’d be fine by yourself. 

Two years down the line you were still traumatized, but through therapy and medication you managed to become a somewhat functional member of society. 

While you wanted to keep in touch with Ratchet, you knew that you couldn’t stay in Jasper anymore. There were too many memories there- so you packed up your bags and moved to Crown City, Virginia. 

You started up a small repair business- cars, toasters, washing machines- if it was tech you would fix it. After time with Soundwave, you knew how to deal with things like that. 

With a need for a more rare spring for an older vending machine, you made your way to the second biggest scrapyard in the area- Denny’s Scrapyard. The door was open, so you figured it was fine to walk right in. 

When you entered, you saw three Cybertronians. Your eyebrows furrowed and you backed away in fear until you saw their insignia. You sighed. 

“Citizen! We are new construction bots. This area is unstable, please ev-”

“Mhm. Okay. You’re the weirdest Autobots I’ve met. Anyway, have you seen the owner of this scrapyard?” They all looked at you with shock. Suddenly a familiar black and yellow bot came around the corner. “Bumblebee?” 

Bumblebee quickly looked down at you. A small look of sadness covered his faceplates as he kneels before you. “Hey, Y/N. It’s been a while. Are you… doing okay?” 

You just nod slowly, backing up a bit. “Yeah. I’m fine, Bee’. You?” 

Before he could answer the blue and white bot spoke up. “Lieutenant, do you know them?” 

Bumblebee nods. “They were part of the original Team Prime.” He looked at you. “This is Strongarm.”

“It’s good to meet someone who was on the team!” Strongarm quickly moved over to you. “What was it like?” You quickly backed away and whimpered, trying to make yourself seem smaller. She took another step forward confused. “What’s wrong? Are you injured? Did I do something?”

“Strongarm! Back up!” Bumblebee pushed her back. “They’ve been through a lot, be gentle with them. 

Strongarm looked guilty, but you assured her it was okay. As time went on, you frequented the scrapyard. You helped Fixit here and there with whatever he’d need, and even patched up minor injuries on the bots. You began to feel more comfortable with the rest of them, making friends for the first time in a long time. With your business booming, and you were doing great. On your calls with Ratchet, he’ll comment on how much you were improving. He was so proud of you that you came out of your shell more. 

 Then it happened. There was an issue with the groundbridge. Two of them appeared where there should have been one, and everyone started panicking. You ran over to try and fix the issue when a jet emerged.

“No, it can’t be.” Bumblebee squinted as he looked closer. 

The jet spun into the sky and landed on the ground. Tentacles emerged from his back as he picked up Grimlock and Strongarm, slamming the two together. 

Bumblebee pushed us all towards the various shelves. “Take Fixit and go hide in the stacks!” While the others ran to hide, you were on your knees frozen to your spot. Flashbacks of what happened in the past came back to you all at once- you couldn’t let it happen again.

Soundwave was quick to notice you. He felt his heart skip a beat. After all this time, he’d finally found you. There was no way he was going to let you go. He deployed Laserbeak to knock Bumblebee out.

Grimlock jumped to attack him, throwing punch after punch on the silent mech. Grimlock was quickly knocked unconscious with Soundwave’s electricity, and Strongarm soon followed thanks to Laserbeak’s skillful distraction. 

Bumblebee was the only one to be thrown into the shadowzone as it soon collapsed after. Soundwave laid his eyes back on you. He was so proud of you- you didn’t try to run away. You just sat there, waiting for him to reclaim you. 

Soundwave gently picked you up into his claws. He rested his visor on your head. This was the first contact he’s had with you in years. You had no idea how much he missed you. 

Denny suddenly came running out of the stacks with a gun raised up. “Let them go!” He yelled at the con’.

Soundwave aimed his weapon at Denny and you shouted. “No!” Soundwave titled his head at you. “Please! Let’s go. I don’t want to be here anymore with them. It will just be me a-and you. Okay?” 

Soundwave didn’t need you to repeat that as he transformed around you, flying away from the base at top speeds. He did, however, mark down the coordinates in case he needed them for future use. 

Soundwave was so happy to have you back. He was never letting you go again- no matter what he had to do. 

[bots-and-cons]

Hi there :b I would like to request a scenario where the Bots and Cons play Five Nights at Freddy's + how they'd react. Cuz like, technically, they ARE animatronics😂 I wonder if that would make them find it more scary, or less scary.

I’m not gonna do both groups because that’s a bit too much, so I just picked the autobots because it seemed like a good fit. Also I absolutely hate fnaf, because I find it freaking terrifying, but I have nothing against writing about it

•Miko of course got the great idea to show the bots this cool horror game that she’d come across

•Bulkhead is naturally the first victim, and his scream brings the rest of the team to the main room

•Everyone is like, “Where’s the danger?” and Miko just points at Raf’s computer like, “game scary”

•Arcee asks if bulk actually screamed like that because of a computer game

•Because she thought it was because of scraplets or something since that’s the last time she heard him scream like that

•She doesn’t believe a game can be that scary, but then she gets to watch Miko and Raf play too and she’s pretty jumpy for the rest of the day

•Of course Arcee wouldn’t admit that she got spooked by the game but she did

•Pretty much everyone, aside from Ratchet and Magnus are watching the kids play, because they really want to know why Bulk screamed and is now refusing to look at the computer

•Optimus is having some very vivid horror, gorey imagery going on in his head of him accidentally transforming with a human on the front seat, because Miko explained Springtrap

•Like holy shit he has nightmares for weeks

•Ratchet just tells Miko he doesn’t have time to look at the game, but based on everyone else’s reactions, he really doesn’t want to

•Magnus is very much not interested and doesn’t really understand the point of horror games in the first place, because his life has enough horror in it already and he doesn’t understand why anyone would want to be scared for fun

•Smokes is really into it, sure he’s scared and he thinks the whole thing is creepy as hell, but he does still really like it

•Though the animatronics are really, really fucking creepy and he’s yelping at the jumpscares

•Bumblebee isn’t really that into it, but he doesn’t want to seem like he’s scared so he’s just forcing himself to watch the game, with his optics wandering all around the room, because he doesn’t want to watch the game

•Wheeljack on the other hand thinks it’s freaking hilarious and is laughing hysterically the whole time, especially at the jumpscares

[transingthoseformers]

More screenshots!

Now, we've established that I was immediately down bad for Scourge the moment i first saw him walk on screen

Primus the things i want to do with this mech

I also got a good snap of Arcee! This is difficult because she's a lot faster thean Scourge, meaning it's pretty hard for me to get clear shots of her

Aaaaand Nightbird! When i watched this movie in theaters i exactly didn't hear Scourge when he said her name, and was confused the entire time i saw her on screen because i didn't know who she is. Y'all kind folks on tumblr informed me that she's Nightbird. Now, one thing i did know was that she's fucking amazing as hell, look at her she's so badass, pretty, she's got a beautiful/terrifying voice, she moves in such a deliberate and fun way, and now that i realize it I should put in her petition for Riot's Evil Babygirl Club.

I apologize for the shaky and tilty nature of these, my hands are about as steady as a fifteen year old rheumatic chihuahua.

[witchofthesouls]

Miko and smokescreen?....do you have any hc at the moment?

Oh, I actually wrote a one-shot about these two on AO3. The username is the same. I used to go by TheMidniteOwl on it but decided to synch my Tumblr and AO3 accounts up.

Okay, so these two dumbasses have so much chaotic energy, that they're bound to gravitate to one another. Like calls to like.

They're both virgins.

Miko comes from a very competitive, stringent society, so she has a lot of pressure to do absolutely excellent and thought Jasper would have been a great place to have a summer romance with a foreigner before hitting the entrance exams back home. Too bad Jasper is ridiculously tiny.

Smokescreen was a raw recruit during the last stages of the siege of Iacon before getting assigned to Alpha Trion that's immensely busy shuttling artifacts into deep space. So no action for him.

Miko is far more forward compared to Smokescreen and far more willing to explore and initiate things.

Between her curiosity and his lack of restraint got the mech a handy after some desert racing and some talk about their homes.

It's not that Smokescreen is shy, he's just very aware of the size differences, has no experience with a partner, let alone an organic one, and has some ingrained cultural practices and taboos as well.

Miko is far more perceptive than people think she is. (She figured out Arcee is something else, hunted down an Insecticon, and utilized the Apex Armor against far more experienced foes.) She can tell when Smokescreen is uncertain or confused (waffling his hands over her clothes), has no idea what to do (playing with her belt), or is deadset against (Do NOT tap the middle of his chestplate).

Plus, Bulkhead will kick his aft straight into a volcano to melt him down and use his reforged corpse to slit Megatron's throat.

If she ever finds out about his valve, she will scream and explore every single nook and cranny of his array just to watch him light up and keen.

Smokescreen will return the favor. He's going to be confused with the lack of biolights and nodes, but he's an enthusiastic sort and wants to figure out Miko.

When Miko found out that Cybertronian dicks are called spikes. She had an absolute field day with that information because her foster family has a dog named Spike.

Of course, she takes the dog to the base.

This girl stares straight into these mechs' optics and introduces her Spike.

The Autobot mechs are dying inside. Smokescreen is straight-up terrified. And Arcee is living it up with double entendres and innuendos. Miko knows exactly what she's doing and does the exact thing.

Smokescreen knows he's in trouble when he starts daydreaming of soft, pretty hands, and spends more time in the shower rack since it's loud enough to drown out his vents and vocalizer.

Since he's Praxian, the others don't side-eye his behavior since Seekerkin tend to be very meticulous with their frames.

Vosians are known for their vanity and Praxians dislike dust and gravel in their seams and joints and cables, especially in their sensory panels.

Nevada is purely sand and dust, so it doesn't strike them as odd or out-of-character.

Because Miko is a menace and an absolute fiend, she finds ways to tease her space-boy.

Deliberating eating strawberry icicles and ice cream pops in front of him.

Giving his frame a car wash as she introduces her 'classmate' to her foster family. She finds out that a holomatter can be very realistic, including sweating.

Her crowning achievement, however unintentional it was, is finding a Hot Wheels toy similar enough to him to repaint and show it to him.

"I guess you're my favorite Hot Wheels, space-boy."

Smokescreen slammed his brakes so hard, he gave her a minor concussion over his stuttering fuel pump and spasming spark, vents hiccuping steam as his AC systems are completely shot.

Definitely, in the top ten awkward moments in his life when he drove her to Jasper Hospital and had to explain why...

It competes with the explanation he needs to give at the base when Mrs. Darby fusses over Miko.

'Hot Wheels' is an extremely provocative expression to ground-frames. It's beyond flirtation and has connotations of sinful debauchery and vice: The absolutely filthy things I shall do to you that will set your very tires on fire.

[nevis-the-skeleton]

tfp starscream ! (cosmics-beings!)

First impression :

So, to contextualize, before watching TFP I watched Cyberverse, and I was just starting to discover Transformers. I still had trouble remembering the names of the characters, or recognizing them. So when I watched the first episode of TFP and found that Starscream didn't look like this anymore:

But like this:

I gone crazy. Also, I found him terrifying at first XD (not to mention Soundwave). I remember asking my sister to press pause, and I cried saying that Starscream and Soundwave scared me XD. It was especially the claws and the look of Starscream that terrified me. I also yelled that they changed the colors which caused me to be lost (because I spot a character or image mostly with the colors). Don't judge me I was discovering Transformers, I was still a novice X).

Impression now :

I love Starscream TFP! Without contest ! He is the most complex and the most brilliant character of the series in my eyes! He's the one who made me love Transformers and the others Starscreams! That's mean a lot! His character, his way of thinking, there's so much to do with this character that he's a real goldmine. I like characters with a strong character, and he has a character that is just incredible XD. Also, he's really cool! We sometimes forget it because Season 3 made a gag of him. But in fact he is incredibly determined, and really strong. Also, he's really pretty X3.

Starscream supremacy !

Favorite moment :

I have a lot of favorite moments with Starscream, but I'll make the effort to name only five X) (that's a lot already… Shhhh…) 1- When he saves Arcee. In fact, I wasn't expecting it, so much that it almost moved me. It really showed me that this character could show pity, when they had never really given him any. It made me really appreciate him. 2- When he flees from Megatron, and manages to fly into a collapsing cave. Do you realize the skill it takes to do that?! It's just impressive! 3- When he goes to look for Breakdown, despite Megatron's orders. I know they're presented this as if he did it for his own benefit. But we must not forget that at the beginning of the episode, he tells Megatron that it is not right to leave Breakdown to his fate. It proves once again that he is much more "empathetic" than the others. Megatron doesn't care, and we never see KnockOut worry about it. 4- His many infiltrations in the Nemesis, which apparently is not very well monitored XD. But one in particular is the chase with the Vehicons, he once again has so much flow in the air, really it's magnificent! 5- The episode in Antarctica, the scene with the Apex Armor is really great. And also it made me happy to see him let off steam a little, knowing that he had been roughed up during the whole episode. And above all, he wins for once! He's the one with the Apex Armor at the end!

Idea for a story :

I had a lot of stories ^^. There is of course "The Polar Star" (of which I am already writing Part 5 in French and Part 4 in English). The novel tells a version where Skyfire exists, and is found by Starscream and Optimus (during episode 13 of Season 2 precisely, with the Apex Armor). I just wanted to give Starscream some love, after being particularly frustrated with Season 3 and the movie. Summary :

Starscream was never very lucky, he knew it... But he didn’t think he was that lucky! He did not think that going to the Arctic to look for a relic would cause him so many problems... He had already had to avoid being destroyed by Dreadwing, and now he found himself prisoner by Optimus... Really, it was pure bad luck... Besides, because of his inability to fly, because of the damn MECH, he was more than destitute... This day could hardly be worse... When they found themselves in front of the ice block containing the relic, the Seeker noticed that it was not a relic inside... But, someone?! And this person is none other than... Skyfire! The ghosts of the past always end up coming back, often bringing back things that were supposed to be long gone... Things that could well change the future itself...

* My other story idea was a novel called "We are the same," and that version takes place at the start of Season 3. Starscream is devastated by the destruction of the Omega Keys, and gives up all reason to live. He then left the Decepticons, and hid in an old military hangar, to let himself starve. But what he didn't know was that a young human named Adler, who also often thinks of death, always takes refuge in this hangar when he's sad. They will each then meet someone who looks a lot like them, and try to enjoy life together (no ship of course, Adler is only 12 years old!)

Unpopular opinion :

Ok... Ready...? I hate Season 3 and the movie!

And, it's not just that I don't like it, I hate it. I know it's violent, and I wouldn't go so far as to hate for Season 3 (thank you Predaking). But the film is a definite no! There was so much injustice towards Starscream it was heartbreaking to watch! And Season 3 may be less hateful than the movie to me, but that doesn't take away the fact that the violence against Starscream was just awful. He really never had a break, and I had to put up with that, and not show anything because I wasn't watching alone…! I showed TFP to a friend, until Season 2, we watched together. Then I asked her to watch Season 3 on her own (I really don't want to watch this season again), and I advised against the film.

Favorite relationship :

Skyfire x Starscream without a doubt! I know that this ship is not possible normally, because Skyfire does not exist in TFP, but I don't care X). For me, no TFP character deserves Starscream, they were all too bad with him! Except maybe Optimus. Skyfire was just the touch of sweetness that was missing, and that Starscream needed in my opinion.

Favorite headcanon :

I like to think that Starscream isn't interrested by sexual stuffs or things like that, despite the fact he's looking very "sexy". I like to think that it's embarrassing him to talk about that.

Thanks for you ask ^^ @cosmics-beings

[lets-try-some-writing]

It’s all fun and games until one of the kids actually gets sick (just a cold or the flu, nothing too crazy) and the bots have to learn about the joys of human illnesses

Hazmat suit time.

Illness on Cybertron generally tends to be pretty quiet. Its often software issues or does not present itself outwardly unless its serious. Their version of a common cold is a software issue that can cause a mech to overheat if they aren't paying attention. Things such as the flu would present as cognitive impairment or an inability to transform. In short, a good number of Cybertron's ailments do not appear on the frame unless one is really looking.

The only illnesses that appear in such a drastic manner are the lethal ones.

As such, when the kids came in with colds, or in Jack's case, the flu- well, the team did not handle it well. They couldn't be sure it wasn't able to transfer across species, and not to mention, their contaminated fluids could damage other humans or equipment. Seeing the children's state quickly got Ratchet to pull out his emergency quarantine equipment.

Ratchet, Arcee, and Bumblebee got themselves dressed helm to pede in hazmat suites, fitted with masks and everything. The bigger mechs in the room where fitted with tarps held in place with rope. Their faces were covered similarly, leaving only their optics visible. Terrifying? Perhaps. But required? Absolute according to Ratchet.

The children were examined as much as possible and Ratchet promptly separated the three from one another. Miko was put into her own pen filled with blankets, food, and water. Bulkhead was set to watch her and let Ratchet know if her temperature shifted too much. Rafael and Jack were treated the same and put in separate units with their guardians watching over them. Optimus served as a constant watchdog and went from unit to unit to assess the children personally and reassure them. Ratchet meanwhile kept constant tabs on their states as he frantically tried to call June and Fowler.

The children did try to tell the team that they were fine, but at most they got pitying looks and assurances that they were going to be fine. The team genuinely feared the kids could die, but none said a word as they worked in silence. When June and Fowler arrived, both were given gas masks and gloves. Only then were they carefully allowed to see the children from a distance. The team weren't taking chances.

Only after Ratchet explained the symptoms did June go from worried to amused. The whole team got to stand around feeling dumb as June told them that the kids were going to be fine. They just needed to go home and rest. All that effort and looking like penguins had been for nothing. Ratchet will die on the hill that he was right to react so drastically. The team disagree and occasionally mock him for it.

[fictional-love-is-my-life]

I love your headcannons can I have the tfp autobots and decepticons cons react to a neutral cybertronian who has the personality of rinny from pretty blood who looks normal but is an psychotic killer who kills in the worse way possible because it brings them joy if your uncomfortable don’t write it

Thank you, I am glad you like my work!

Warnings: Mentions of death, killing, harm, psychotic behavior.

~~

Autobots:

Optimus is very disappointed. He is appalled by their behavior and thinks it is awful He would like to talk to them, to try and get them to stop. But he knows his efforts would be worthless. The best he can do is keep them far away from the base in order to keep his Autobots safe.

Ratchet thinks there must be something wrong with their spark or their processor. Whether from creation or from an accident. But there is definitely something wrong with them. They send unpleasant shivers down his back. He is glad he barely goes outside, because he never wants to risk bumping into them.

Bulkhead wants to be the one to end their life. They disturb him and part of him never wants to meet them. But he also thinks they don't deserve to live after the horrendous murders they committed. And if he could make their reign of terror come to an end, that would make him happy.

Bumblebee never wants to see them. He hates the idea that they are out there. He's met some nasty bots before, but this neutral bot gives him nightmares. If it weren't for the humans, he would have suggested the leave Earth and try to hide far away at the other end of the universe. He has no idea how a Cybertronian could do such horrible things to other bots.

Arcee thought Blackarachnia was the worst. Then she heard of this neutral killer. Stories of them made her sick. She'd love to be a part of the team that takes them down. But at the same time, she hopes she never meets them. After learning about them she becomes constantly alert, worried they are out there and they could get her.

Decepticons:

Megatron has met many different bots. Many of whom have hurt others or conducted experiments on bots, like Blackarachnia and Soundwave. But this neutral bot makes them look like amateurs. They even make Megatron feel uncomfortable. He will be quite happy if they stay a neutral and far away from him. He also thinks if perhaps they were to cross paths with them, them may just get a canon blast to then chest. For his safety.

Starscream is terrified of them. He's heard horror stories about them and he never wants to cross paths with them. If they were to meet, his plan is to fly away as fast as he can. He thinks they should just drop a bunch of bombs on them. He's not even willing to send vehicons after them. He thinks it would be too harsh on the poor vehicons.

Knockout thinks they could possibly be one of the worst Cybertronians to ever exist. They kill for joy, and not even for a side to try and win the war. They are psychotic and Knockout never wants to meet them. Knockout thinks they should seek professional help, but that would be unfair to the poor medic who tries. So instead he hopes they just fall over dead.

Breakdown, like Knockout, hopes they just keel over. But they probably won't get that lucky. He has no interest in trying to find them to fight them,. He's strong, but he doesn't want to risk the possibility they could be stronger than him. He doesn't want to die horrifically at their hands. He'd much rather stay on the ship where he is safe.

Soundwave has set up cameras, alarms and a whole security system to ensure they never set foot on his ship. He is not afraid of them, but he still dislikes their behavior. He does not want them around. He will be quite happy never seeing them in person, and he won't feel sorry if they come to an unfortunate end.

[melishade]

I got questions for Shockwave's timeline latest chapter. Like a lot.

1. Titan with no teeth is Eren ? How ? Is it because he get a battlemask from hardening serum or something ? I thought it was Reiner

2. Is Zeke interrogated ? Tortured ? Cause I personally want to know

Previous Episode

That was a typo on my part and I fixed it.

Zeke is currently being held prisoner by Paradis Island. How did that happen? Well let's rewind a little before Arcee and Wheeljack's arrival.

TW violence. TW torture. TW death. It does get pretty intense.

So if you remember Part 4: Eren’s emotions, Eren flipped out over the loss of Optimus. His mentor, his friend, his father, was now in the hands of some sadistic monster. He could actually die and Eren is terrified. Zeke tries to comfort him (Because he still wants Eren on his side for the Euthanasian Plan), but he says the wrong thing, Eren takes his anger out on Zeke, and outs him for not telling Megatron about Shockwave before things got worse. Because the Survey Corps still needed to find out where Zeke stood in all of this, they didn't out his betrayal to Marley, specifically Magath, because he's the only Marleyan official left.

So after Eren is dragged away by Megatron, Magath drags Zeke away, with Pieck following close behind, but not noticed by either of them. Magath throws Zeke in a room and demands an explanation because 'you were working with the island?!' 'You were going to betray your motherland?!' 'YOU HAD A CHANCE TO STOP ALL OF THIS FROM HAPPENING BY SIMPLY TELLING THE FLYING TITAN ABOUT SHOCKWAVE?!' Magath can't help but agree with Eren! They were all here at this moment because of Zeke!

Zeke retorts saying he didn't know this would happen, and Zeke is trying not to lose his standing and access to Marley because if they somehow make it out of this, Zeke could lose his standing, and get eaten by the next warrior. So...he lies. He does tell Magath about the wine in order to 'take control of the island' for Marley. He says it was a long term plan to ensure Marley had control of the island long term. He was still there to serve his motherland. He tells him that his second, Yelena, distributed the wine. And when this was somehow over, Zeke would be able to take control of the island. All he was doing was for Marley.

Magath, wants to believe Zeke, but he's clearly lied for years at this point. And even if Magath wanted to go along with this plan, he couldn't. Being on the island, with the people, slowly destroyed his perception of Eldians. On top of that, Optimus' bravery and sacrifice just saved thousands of lives: Annie, Lara, the fucking Warrior Cadet, innocent men, women, and children. Magath owes Optimus a debt at this point, and going with Zeke's plan was just spitting in the face of what Optimus and the Survey Corps have done. So Magath doesn't agree to go along with Zeke plan, but he doesn't decide to rat him out either. He tells Zeke: "If you do this, and they find out, you are on your own."

Pieck hears all of this and slips away before either spot her, and Pieck is scared now. The island might not be safe if Zeke succeeds in his plan, and she owes Optimus and Megatron her life. But if she did this, she could possibly be betraying Marley and Zeke. But it was clear Zeke had his own self interest. Optimus and Megatron did not, so she makes a choice. She finds Megatron and Levi (because Megatron is having the talk about taking a leadership role again), and tells them what Zeke had done. Levi is pissed off at Zeke, but Megatron...is terrifyingly calm. Megatron gives Levi and Pieck one order: "Round up all the Restorationists."

Levi grabs everyone who hadn't drunk the wine and uses them to get the Restorationists with Pieck's help. Megatron ends up acquiring Hanji help, after some major reluctance because she's still pissed at both him and Levi right now. And after they are rounded up, Levi ends up dragging Zeke, hands bound, legs cut off, gagged, to a secluded area away from civilization. Levi removes the gag and Zeke immediately tries to scream and call the titans, but he can't. The soldiers he's surrounded by haven't taken the wine. Megatron makes his appearance in holoform with Pieck and Hanji behind him. Pieck looking both guilty and ashamed while Hanji looked so...unkempt and dead inside, holding something in her crossed arms. Zeke demands what's going on, and Pieck just tells him to stop lying because he already told him about the wine. Now Zeke is scared. The Restorationists are fearful because they didn't know about the wine. They didn't they swear! Megatron takes note of this, and the way Yelena is just in stunned horror. He's gauging their reaction to see who's honest and who's not. The Restorationists seemed earnest, Yelena was not. And Megatron does not have time to mess around. Not now. Not while Shockwave was out there and everyone was in danger. So he reacts:

Megatron snatched a pistol from one of the guards, ignoring the now fearful cries of the Restorationists. They were terrified now. They were going to die! For something they didn't do! They weren't involved! They didn't know!

"Wait! Stop!" Zeke pleaded as Megatron snapped back the barrel.

"Megatron, hold on!" Pieck shouted as Megatron pulled the hammer down. He aimed the pistol at Yelena's head. And as she registered the gun in her face, snapping out of her stunned silence, Megatron fired. Yelena's head was blown open. Blood and guts flew everywhere, hitting the ground and people's clothes. Yelena's corpse slumped forward before collapsing on the ground, causing the Restorationist to cry out in terror. Zeke was in horror and Pieck covered her mouth at such a violent and instant act. Levi even seemed off-put at such a cold act. Hanji, didn't seem to care, nor did she want to.

"Y-you!" Zeke tried to speak, but Megatron merely snapped the barrel back again, causing everyone to shut up. They all internally prayed that another shot wouldn't go off and someone else would die.

"My enemy," Megatron began in a calm, stern, voice, "My friend...my brother."

Zeke gulped at that. Brother? Optimus...Optimus was his brother?! He didn't know that! Was it just brother in arms?! It had to be! But...he just pissed someone off that considered Optimus a brother! Zeke froze in fear as Megatron turned his head towards Zeke. Both he and Levi, saw a swirl of emotions in Megatron's eyes. He looked furious, like one simple word could set him off at any minute. He looked...betrayed. Almost disappointed even at Zeke's treachery. Levi could also see something he never expected to see on someone like Megatron...agony. Megatron was in agony.

"The only constant in my life for over four million years may be dead, because of you," Megatron addressed Zeke without raising his voice, "Optimus risked his life to save those thousands of lives. I saved your life; I kept you out of Shockwave's claws. And this is how you repay us? By spitting in the face of our kindness? Putting us all at risk of Shockwave's demented experiments? Shockwave is crueler than I, and Optimus is now in his hands because of your selfish decision."

Megatron dropped the pistol to the ground. "Optimus believes in this dirt ball. He believes that you humans are capable of 'great things', and for the life of me, I can never see it. He believes that every sentient beings deserves an opportunity for redemption."

Megatron extended his hand towards Hanji. "I do not."

Zeke grew fearful as Hanji placed a syringe in his hands filled with something without a word. Zeke tried to run, but Levi had grabbed him and forced him into a submission hold.

"No! No! Please!" Zeke begged as Megatron approached him. Megatron covered his mouth and jammed the syringe directly into Zeke's larynx. Zeke let out a muffled scream, but was quickly silence as Megatron injected the liquid into Zeke's throat. Megatron let go of Zeke as the titan shifter was choking. His throat was burning, he could feel this liquid burning him from the inside out. It was agony! Zeke choked on his spit, tried to breathe, tried to speak, but nothing was coming out. Megatron merely kneeled down and showed Zeke the remnants of what was in that vial, and Zeke could only stare in confusion with tears welling up in his eyes from the pain. Was that...was that an energon serum? Why did it burn so much?!

"Raw energon," Megatron clarified the burning question that Zeke had, "Hanji had done enough experimentation to determine that energon in it's purest form, or as a form of a weapon, would be enough to slow down regeneration of an energon powered titan shifter."

Zeke could only choke, unable to come up with a response.

"You will be injected with this 24/7," Megatron declared, "You will be confined in a place where no one will be able to find out. You will never speak again. You will never scream again. You will never see the light of day again."

Zeke tried to plead with him, but it only came out as a strangled cry and a painful wheeze. Megatron yanked Zeke back by the titan's shifter's gray hair and forced him to look in his red eyes.

"If Optimus does not live by the end of this, you will follow him soon after," Megatron swore, letting Zeke's hair go and standing up, "Take him away."

Levi did not need to be told twice. He grabbed a struggling Zeke, clawing at his throat, desperately trying to get the energon out of his body. He turned to two soldiers and ordered them to follow him to take Zeke to his prison. Levi looked back and...oddly wanted to check in on Megatron, but this was beyond him right now, and he needed to make sure Zeke was secure first.

The Restorationists grew fearful as Megatron turned his attention to them. He walked over to them, stepping in the pool of blood by Yelena's corpse.

"The only reason the rest of you continue to function, is because of a hunch," Megatron told them, "A whim. We need allies, and we cannot afford this treachery while Shockwave is around. This is your only warning. If any of you try anything,"

Megatron pointed to Yelena's corpse. "That will be your fate. Do you understand?"

Onyankopon stepped forward and spoke up, despite his fear. "If you help us save our homelands, we will forever be in your debt."

Megatron didn't reply to that comment. "For the time being, you will be watched and monitored. You will need to earn our trust. This is your only offer."

Pieck watched the Restorationists accept the offer that they were given before they were escorted out of the area. Pieck forced herself to walk up to him, ignoring the corpse on the ground.

"I...," Pieck trailed off, her voice dying in her throat as Megatron glanced back at her. Pieck instinctually braced herself for something worse, but it never came.

"...thank you," Megatron said to her. Pieck was surprised at the gesture, but recognized she wasn't going to get anything else out of him. He looked...weary. Oh so, weary.

"I'm sorry...for everything," Pieck could only muster, electing to leave Megatron alone and leave.

"This changes nothing," Hanji coldly spoke, coming back towards Megatron on her horse, "This changes nothing about the shit decision you and Levi made about leaving Optimus behind."

"...I expected nothing less." Megatron could only reply.

"What about that?" Hanji nudged her head to Yelena's corpse.

"I'm sure the wolves will enjoy an easy meal," Megatron answered.

"Fine," Hanji huffed, "I hate you."

Megatron didn't say a word as Haji rode off back to civilization, stopping quickly to ask Pieck if she wanted a ride. Megatron looked back at Yelena's corpse and merely clenched his fists.

"I'm sorry," Megatron whispered to no one before deactivating the holoform.

-So after this, Zeke is kept in an isolated, underground, prison created by Lara with very little room, getting his throat injected with energon to prevent him from calling titans to his aid. They can't trust Zeke, and transferring his power over to Historia should have been an easy decision, but the military and Megatron have no idea how long this conflict with Shockwave will last, and they needed a symbol for the people to guide them. And Historia is doing her best to keep the public calm and make ideas to provide aid to the refugees. Having her die in 13 years isn't practical at the moment.

-Megatron ends up confronting Magath, causing Magath to grow tense. Megatron warns him not to try anything. His complacency in all of this is something that his putting Megatron off, and the only reason he's not dying today, is because he decided to not help Zeke.

-Because of Pieck's decision to tell about the wine, the Survey Corps do end up trusting her completely. They trust that she can be a reliable ally, possibly even a friend, because she prevented something worse from happening.

-The wine is disposed of accordingly; however, long term effects of the titan serum have yet to be foreseen. They don't know if it will be permanently in their bodies.

-Megatron...oh Megatron himself is in a pretty dark place right now, because there is a lot riding on him and his shoulders now. And he is genuinely scared of Optimus' fate and even the fate of the island. He knows for a fact that he cannot fail. He has to correct his error.

(So even after Optimus rescued, Zeke is still locked underground, and when Optimus asks about using the Founding Titan. Oh it's gonna be awkward to explain)

[prince-toffee]

My review of Rise of the Beasts

It was... okay. I liked like 70% of it. We're inching- we're inching closer and closer to that perfect Transformers movie, but we're not there yet. I gotta say I liked Bumblebee (2018) more but that's not really fair to say because it's my favourite movie of all time, because it was the first time we had proof that live action Transformers movies can be good, the first time that they made a genuine effort and were created by decent human beings. So, this movie can't beat that in my mind. Overall, I'd give this film a 6.5 out of 10

Spoilers obvi

Not sure how to structure this, so I'll just go chronologically through the film and say whatever pops into my head. The opening is fun. Scourge is terrifying. I kind of love that he dispatches Apelink pretty much effortlessly, it's so disheartening and horrifying and it really tells the audience that the main characters are screwed. Look, the bar is so so SO low so when we see Primal sad when Apelink transfers the leadership over to him, you're like ‘Oh my God, there are people, that's great’. Voice acting in general is great, Peter Dinklage sounds great as Scourge. Ron Pearlman as Primal is phenomenal.

There wasn't much depth to Scourge, he's just evil for the sake of being evil, but he's good at being evil for the sake of being evil, but honestly I’m kind of disappointed because I thought I heard Steven Capel Jr say he wanted the villain to not just be plain evil, so I think some scenes could have been cut out. Unicron mentions that Scourge, Nightbird, and Battletrap are survivors of a world he consumed, but... why? Why did he pick them? I thought Scourge was like in a Silver Surfer situation like ‘hey don't eat my world and I'll lead you to other worlds’ and that's why he keeps serving Unicron to protect his home, that way there is a parallel there between OP and Scourge, they both want to go back to and protect their home, Scourge is what OP could be if not for the character arc he embarks on. Which would have been great. But we didn't really get that. But you have no idea how happy I was to hear that OP was getting a character arc, like I said the bar is on the floor.

Now... a major gripe here:... I noticed a plot hole. So, the Maximals use the Transwarp Key to escape through space and time and go back in time to earth, right? Airazor mentions she's from their ‘past and future’ and Primal mentions that he was named after Optimus. So, they are from the future. So... how does Scourge know them? How does Unicron know them? Shouldn't they be like WTF this weird energy signature just appeared, what is this? Who are these people? An easy fix would have been if Scourge and Co grab onto the ship and follow them through the portal and they get lost along the way somewhere in space that's why they're not on earth from the get go and then they are drawn to the planet by the key being activated and then once they get the key they call Unicron from their future by opening a portal through time.

Human stuff is good. Humans are bearable. Humans have never been better. I actually found myself tearing up at the scenes between Noah and Chris. The Sonic and Tails reference was cute. Calling Mirage Knuckles was extremely adorable too.

I have to admit when the Autobots first appear on screen I got so excited. Loved Arcee, Liza Koshy did a really good job, I really wasn't expecting her to deliver the lines so perfectly, I love the G1/Energon design. Especially the shade of pink they use for her visor it's delightful. I like this interpretation of Arcee, she's like a tech-head, she sounds like a strategist, very much G1/Animated personality. The dynamics between the Autobots are really fun. I love the fact that they actually like each other and are friends.

References to Bee (2018) are much appreciated, thank you.

Mirage is great, love him, a new fan favourite for me, he's funny, he's adorable, he sincere, Pete Davidson did a damn good job. Formula One G1 reference was fun, but that was one of those instances where the CGI wasn't great. His relationship with Noah makes the film alongside with OP's arc.

I like the reasoning behind the Autobots needing him, him being a thief and all that. I like that the humans serve a purpose and it all brilliantly ties in together. I think that the first act is the tightest by far.

So, a new concept introduced in this film is that bots can transform into any vehicle they want no matter the size, that's cool, explains the mass-shifting for others like Shockwave and Megatron, I know some people might have a problem with that, but I actually thought it was fine.

Apart from Prime (show) this is Peter Cullen's best performance yet as Optimus. Love that he distrusts humans and doesn't care for them much at the beginning, I love the guilt and shame that he feels for pretty much losing the war and getting his Autobots stranded on a backwater planet I love all of those scenes with Optimus.

Would have loved to see that deleted scene with OP killing Transit and hunting Decepticons and dumping their bodies into the Hudson, that sets the perfect tone for his journey and the mental state that he's in.

But on the other hand I like the fact that without this scene the Decepticons haven't made it to earth yet, not diminishing Bee’s victory at the end of the last film.

Humans don't see the beacon, that's cool. Explains why the police don't just show up right away.

Those BayFrenzy-looking things, hate them, once again that Bayverse garbage from the producers is leaking in. There's a lot of good stuff from Steven Caple Jr here to counterbalance that. And all the best stuff from this movie comes from him and his personal rewrites from what I can tell from his interviews. But that God damn Bayhem still pokes its head out from time to time. Like... every villain gets decapitated and is murdered gruesomely. It's completely unnecessary. It doesn't allow for these villains to grow in later sequels which is unfortunate. Stratosphere coughs up an engine, whatever, at least it wasn't a fart joke. Like I said; the bar is on the floor.

The museum fight is fun, it's good, entertaining, we can actually see what's happening. The Terrorcons are formidable. ‘Primus would be ashamed’ what a great quote. Great one liners from Scourge, you can tell that he's a psycho and that he enjoys being a psycho, good stuff.

I wish Nightbird and Battletrap talked more, I wish they had a Shatter/Dropkick relationship. Just something you know? They hate each other / they love each other / they hate but they respect each other / they are plotting against each other. Just something. Anything. But at least they look great, and unique, and you can tell them apart. The voice acting is really good, especially for Nightbird.

I love that OP wants the Transwarp Key to go home, while Noah wants to destroy it, all that stuff makes for fascinating conflict, I really love that. But it makes you wonder though why the Maximals didn't destroy the key themselves. Maybe it can't be destroyed only split, or they secretly hoped they could use it to travel the universe again one day to protect and shepherd different planets as that is their role in this continuity stated by Primal.

OP is furious over the death of Bee, his son, and that's great, the guilt he feels, that shame of losing the war, stranding his Autobots on a planet he doesn’t recognise, the same actions that lead to Bee dying, it's all excellent.

Bee being in a coma gives OP further motivation to get back to Cybertron, every event in this movie is really just hitting him over the head saying ‘you should have never come here’ ‘it's all your fault’.

We meet Wheeljack, he's still ugly, still looks like Urkel, but I actually love him, he's adorable, he actually reminds me a little bit of Earthspark Wheeljack, so I really liked him for like the three scenes he was in, there wasn't really a point to him, he doesn't do anything techy, but he was fun. Paying respect to Peru culture was delightful. The Maximals having a relationship with the indigenous native people is so heart-warming and so joyful to watch. One thing I love about this movie is that they avoid the Chariots of the Gods bullshit, Primal says ‘we cannot take credit for human ingenuity’ this movie gives so much respect and props to indigenous people and poc, it's wonderful. You know a white person did not write that.

I wanted more of the Maximals, because I mean the title is ‘Rise of the BEASTS’. but they kind of stand as the perfect link between the Autobots and the humans, they represent that techno-organic bond, the theme of coexistence, they represent what OP could be and becomes, so they serve their purpose in the movie perfectly fine, but still, wish they were kind of more important. Everyone's voices sound great, it all fits, I would love to hear more of these voice actors.

The Peru battle is good. OP is pissed and I love that, when Scourge is around he can't keep a cool head because of the emotional turmoil he feels inside after losing Bumblebee, I love that he finally feels emotions and isn't just monotone all the time.

Now, Scourge has some weird trackers that corrupt you and turn you evil, so... why doesn't he use them all the time? At least say he only has one, or it costs something to produce them, that's why he can't use them all the time. I guess also the reason is he enjoys killing his victims with his own hands, it's a sport to him.

I wish we had more emotional scenes with Airazor so that when she dies it would have had a bigger impact on us. It's sad, because you're getting to see Primal and Airazor as friends, but only for a little bit and it's sad because you see him crush her chest, but the transformers films still have the same problem of cutting to humans reacting dramatically to the dramatic thing happening rather than showing us it. And if it's too horrifying to focus on her chest caving in, focus on Primal’s sorrowful face or on Airazor’s face as she dies as the light leaves her eyes. Either or.

I think the movie really shines in its first and second act, and the third act is kind of the weakest. I think the third act suffers from generic Avengers faceless army syndrome. It looks great. When these CGI people are fighting in a CGI world it works and it looks like everything fits, but still it's very generic.

Also, a small rant incoming, when Mirage knocks Scourge’s ‘mask’ off, we cut away from Scourge, we see he pick up the mask and we dramatically reveal... what? Nothing. Is it Bayverse OP, because becoming a psychopath was his arc in those movies, no it's not because it's the same producers working on these films so there's no way we could make fun of the Bay films, those films bought them seven different beach houses they think that they are good films. So, is it someone OP knows from his past? No. Is it at least an Easter egg for fans, is the G1 Scourge? Is it RID 2001 Scourage? Is it Cybertron (show) Scourge? Nope! It’s just some guy. He's nobody. So many missed opportunities.

That moment with Mirage protecting Noah, the conversation with his brother, it's all super emotional and phenomenally acted by Anthony Ramos. All good stuff.

The suit CGI is unfortunately not great. I did like the whole homage to Daniel’s suit from The Transformers The Movie 1986 and to Kicker/Sari’s suit from Energy/Animated.

I wish the temptation of Unicron would last a bit longer, like maybe we see OP being tempted with a vision of his greatest desires, like he's back on Cybertron with Elita, the war is over, Megatron is defeated, you know? Just do something more with it.

Overall, I liked Bumblebee more, but it's okay I'd give it a 6.5 out of 10

[lex-munro]

[Suicide Squad Scrap] Princess pt. 17

self-indulgent batjokes-flavored SS/BvS/JL, installment 17.  by this point, Ratcatcher has accepted Joker’s somewhat ambiguous gender identity and has decided they are platonic galpals.  chapter contains a barely-off-panel sex act.  TW:  dubious/coerced consent.

the piece as a whole is rated Mature for pervasive language, varying degrees of violence, use of controlled substances, sexual references, questionable ethics, and themes of mental illness.  set from Flag’s POV, with references to Birds of Prey, but not compliant with The Suicide Squad.

p.s. i’ve loved pretty much every version of Mercy Graves.  shoutout to underpaid henchwomen.

p.p.s. Mister J is genuinely more upset about his hair, just saying.  that’s where the bad behavior is coming from.

***

~All right, I’ve tapped a line to the admin server, so we’ll be able to pull a prison census and a map, as well as maybe some easy admin overrides.  Resuming my trip to the roof while Flag heads out to be Mister J’s backup.~

Flag sets about fully securing the unconscious guards.

~Overrides, eh?~ says Digger.  ~Anything for the front door?~

~No, Goomba, I fucking told you the door control is on the naked-ass roof of this building, where I will probably get shot to death if somebody sees me.  So!  I’m at the door now, Mister J—give ‘em the old razzle-dazzle.~

~Probably gonna end up cuffed, so I’ll leave my comm open,~ Joker tells them.  ~Here we go.~

A knock.

~Candygram!~

~Classic,~ Digger says with a chuckle.

A minor commotion.

~Four of you?  I charge extra for gang bangs.~

~Shut the fuck up!  Who are you?  How did you get here?~

~Now, now, no call for such aggression.~

~ Got the door,~ says Ratcatcher.

~Heh, open sesa—FUCKING HELL!  Jeezling Chrimbo holiday biscuit batter…~

“Report!” Flag snaps.  He finishes tying the last guard and heads for the door.

~Fucking close call, is all,~ grumbles Digger.  ~Doors started to close as soon as I crossed the threshold.  Got one sleeve stuck and a very good boomerang at a very precise angle keeping the door from crushing half my torso and skull.  Can’t even take a full breath.  I am at your fuckin’ mercy, Arcee.~

~Some kinda failsafe—I’m on it, Dicker.~

~Handcuffs, oh my.  That’s one of my kinks, boys.  Ooh, and manhandling!  Lucky me.~

Flag hits the door running.  “Backup on the way, Jay!”

~Pretty mouth on you, princess.  Whattaya say?  Gonna be a good little freak for Daddy?~

~Oh, I’m definitely a freak~ the Joker says.  ~But I’ve already got a Daddy.  Still, I fancy myself a talented cocksucker, and I haven’t been face-fucked in ages, so if you’re volunteering…~

“Jay, you don’t have to go that far,” Flag pants, bursting into the lookout building.

~Speaking as the person most likely to be shot to death if these fuckers happen to look out the window at the wrong time, go as far as it fucking takes!~ Ratcatcher snaps.

~As the person currently one boomerang away from being a human crepe if she gets shot, I second the motion!~ adds Digger.

~Yeah, princess?~ the thug leader says, sounding too interested.

~You said I had a pretty mouth, didn’t ya?  No gag reflex, either.  Ah-ah!~ Joker scolds with a little growl.  ~Hands off the ‘do.  Only Daddy gets to touch my hair.~

~Yeah, we’ll see who’s your Daddy, sweetie…~

~Ick,~ says Ratcatcher.  ~Men are so gross.  I’m almost done, max three more minutes.  Lie back and think of England.  Or…I’unno, Gotham, I guess.~

(~You know, not all men are like that.~ ~Did you seriously just fucking ‘not all men’ me?  Not all rats can chew your dick off in ten seconds or less—wanna chance that when I get down there?~)

Seven goddamn floors up, and the elevator has an ‘out of order’ sign hanging from it.  “Piece of shit broken elevator,” Flag huffs, and bursts into the stairwell.

~Best three minutes of your life, coming right up,~ Joker purrs, followed by a long, loud slurp.

~I feel like there should be a word for turned on, grossed-out, and terrified on account of being on the verge of getting literally crushed to death all at the same time,~ Digger grunts.  ~The stress will kill me if this damn thing don’t, Arcee, hurrythefuckup.~

~Eugh, think I’m gonna hurl,~ Ratcatcher groans over the loud noises of whichever-asshole-lookout having too much fun for a guy with metal teeth next to his junk.

~Almost to ya, Arcee,~ says Lawton.  ~And then anybody looking out here ain’t gonna see shit but a bullet.~

Flag hears another wet sound and a drawn-out moan and runs harder.

~Heh, whatcha gonna do now you’re a sloppy mess, princess?  Whatcha gonna tell your Daddy, huh?  What now?~  And the guy laughs mockingly.

Joker spits (not in the guy’s face, from the lack of reaction, but it’d serve the fucker right).

~In position,~ hisses Lawton.  ~Jay, you just say the word, and that piece of shit has frontal lobe air conditioning.~

~Hmmm, what now?~ Joker drawls with eerie calm.  ~What’s your name, big guy?~

“Coming up the stairs,” says Flag.  “Ready to breach on your signal.”

~Vince,~ the rapist says.

Joker makes an agreeable noise.  ~Well, Vinnie, now you’re all mine.  I’m gonna start by fuckin’ up your knee, and maybe breaking your nose.  The guy by the window’s going down next, and one of the guys by the door.  By then, I’ll be out of my cuffs, so I’ll drop Number Four with something heavy, like that lamp over there, probably before he can even raise his gun.  Then me ‘n you are gonna have some quality time together, Vinnie.~

~You delusional f—~

There’s a couple of meaty crunching noises, then laughter and a bullet through the window, so Flag rams the door and clotheslines the guy right next to it.

Joker swings the floor lamp at the last guy, hitting him precisely in the temple and dropping him like a sack of potatoes.

One guy is still writhing on the ground:  presumably Vince, and Flag is a hundred percent behind the idea of letting Joker do whatever the fuck he wants to the creep.

(~Got it!~ says Ratcatcher.  And, ~About fuckin’ time,~ coughs Digger.)

Joker unfastens the second handcuff and lets it drop, then smoothes a hand over his curls (tangled and mussed from being pulled, and for some reason, the idea turns Flag’s stomach worse than the noises before).  “Vinnie, Vinnie, Vinnie,” he tuts, then sighs.  “You were doing so well.  I like swallowing a little sausage now and then, but ya got greedy.”

~Anybody recording for posterity?~ Ratcatcher asks with a dark chuckle.

~I got you covered, Jay,~ Lawton says.  ~He tries anything, he’s gone.  You do whatever your bloodthirsty little heart desires, man.~

Joker flicks his butterfly knife out of his pocket and fidgets it open and shut a couple of times.  “I toldya, Vinnie:  only Daddy gets to touch my hair.  But you just had to have a yank.  If I hadn’t had such a good upbringing, I’d use this knife to do something real unladylike to ya,” he says, trailing the blade up the inside of Vince’s thigh.  “Instead, I’m gonna do you a favor:  I’m gonna make it so you can smiiiiile, ear to ear, every single day, happy as can be.”

Flag makes himself watch as Joker slides the knife in and jerks it back out twice to the sound of pained howls.  There’s lipstick on the guy’s fly.

Joker purrs happily and puts his knife away. “Much better!  Why so serious?” he asks, showing his three grinning tatts to the sobbing mess on the floor.  Then he wipes his left hand across to reveal his hateful scowl, lipstick smearing in a false half-grin.  “And the name’s Joker, you ungrateful fucking Philistine.  Can’t anybody fucking read anymore?”

“You need anything else here, Jay?” Flag offers.

Instead of answering, the clown switches his comm back from open and sweeps out of the room.  As he follows behind, Flag can see that Joker’s pants are riding lower than ever, showing an unfamiliar tattoo across his tailbone, just below the dimples.

“Is that seriously a tiny bat-shaped tramp stamp?” Flag asks.

Joker just flashes a wordless grin over his shoulder.

Lawton meets them out front with the coat Flag abandoned earlier, and he helps Joker into it without being asked.

~My buddies found Turner,~ Ratcatcher informs them.  ~Yo, Dicker, you through yet?~

~Yeah.  I’m looking at the main comms relay, which looks to have itemized camera feeds.  Hold up, got a boomerang for this…~

The fire escape rattles, and Ratcatcher lands in a crouch beside them.  “They said Croc’s near the bottom, and Turner’s one floor up.  Thanks for keeping them off me Mister J—that was pretty boss of you.”  The tablet beeps, and she starts poking through the cameras.  “Good work, Human Crepe; I got visual on the target.  Bronze Tiger, the fuck kinda codename is that?  Sounds like a wrestling move…”

“Porn star,” Flag argues.

“Gaybar,” Joker asserts, to general agreement.  “Fuck, now I wanna own a gaybar called Bronze Tiger…”

“Elevator shaft?” says Lawton.

“Natch.  Not feeling energetic about ladders, though, so I vote for riding most of the way.”

“Arcee?” Flag prompts.

One of her ‘buddies’ climbs her and tells her something.  “Yep, the cellar door here connects to the tunnels where Human Crepe is rollin’ up; auxiliary freight elevator there can take us all the way down.”

In they go, down rusted stairs and into echoing tunnels.  A right turn, a left corner, a right corner, a pair of two-foot-thick thresholds that must’ve been the airlock that almost crushed Digger.  He’s just unplugging a little pocket computer from the comms relay box as they approach.

Another fifty feet, and there it is, clearly labeled ‘Auxiliary Freight Elevator,’ like a plot device in a cartoon.  Lawton helps Flag wrench open the rickety steel gate, and they’re on their way.

Ratcatcher starts humming Girl From Ipanema as they descend.  Lawton joins in.  And then Joker starts singing.

“And when she passes, I smile but she doesn’t see…”

“Doesn’t seeee,” Digger chimes in on cue.

Flag kind of hopes the elevator will crash and they’ll all die.

They peter off into blessed silence, and Flag has just enough time to breathe a sigh of relief.

“Fuck!” Joker yells, startling them.

“Jesus!” squawks Digger.  “What?”

“I chipped a goddamn nail…should’ve cut Vinnie’s balls off after all.”  Joker seethes for a moment, then reaches up to smooth down his hair again.  “Is my hair okay, at least?  Fuck, I feel ugly.”

“Aw, no, Mister J,” Ratcatcher tells him, daintily reaching up to fix a minor tangle.  “You’re so pretty.  Nobody else could pull off orange and purple like you do, ‘specially with green hair.  The Bat would still totally swoon if he saw you right now, chipped nail and all.”

Joker settles a little.  “I’m gonna shoot so many kneecaps when we get down there.”

“No, you’re not,” Flag admonishes.  “We’re trying to be sneaky.  No loud noises if we can avoid it.”

“Croc ain’t exactly subtle, either,” Digger says.

“Jones knows when to keep it low key.”

Lawton scoffs.  “The James Brown suit he was rocking the other day would be evidence to the contrary.”

“Not everybody can pull off a cravat like that.”

“I’m not saying he didn’t make it work; it just wasn’t low key.  Should maybe get Turner first.  What was the security like, Arcee?”

“Huh?  Kinda thin, but they don’t need numbers with those fancy LexCorp guns.  You know those things got a puke setting?  For ‘non-violent pacification.’  Yuck.  Heard that Mercy bitch was around, too; some kinda inspection that’s got the wardens here piddling like puppies.”

Lawton hums thoughtfully.  “Shitty tunnels with piped power, everybody on edge…  Who’s up for a haunted house?”

Flag sees the shape of a plan.  “We’ll stop early—Arcee will hit the lights while Jay plays diversion.  Lawton pops ‘em quiet as a…well, mouse.  If Luthor’s henchbitch is here, all the more reason to tread softly.”

Joker tilts his head.  “Never had a chance to meet her.  She’s that scary, huh?”

“She carries Kryptonite bullets and once beat the shit out of Deathstroke,” Flag explains.

“Hmmmm.”

“No.  Whatever you just thought, no.  I’m not explaining to the Bat how I let you get your ass handed to you by a megalomaniac’s sidekick.  We’re doing the haunted house thing.  You like scaring the piss outta people, right?”

So they take out the lights and go for Turner first, Joker humming a little tune and skipping through the shadows like something out of The Shining.  The third guard they take down really does piss himself.

Nobody they take out has keys to the cells, which is very inconvenient.  Joker dances his way down the corridors, spectral in the shitty chartreuse emergency backup lighting, and glues himself to a door.

“He still intact?” Flag asks, assuming it’s their target.

“Hm?  Oh.  Yep.  Anybody got a set of  lockpicks?”

“You don’t?” Lawton asks, brows high on his forehead.

“Nah.  Always borrow ‘em.”

“Stand back, kids,” Ratcatcher says.  She cracks her knuckles and pulls out a metal file and a dental scraper from her coat pockets.

“Where the hell—” Flag starts to ask.  “Never mind, don’t wanna know.”

After about ninety seconds of little clicks and clinks and metallic scraping noises, the lock turns.  “Lucky those fit,” she comments.  “Real thing is a lot skinnier.”

Turner—codename Bronze Tiger—sits up with a yawn and says, “Do I know you?”  He’s handcuffed and dressed in a plain blue jumpsuit.

“Nope,” says Flag.  “You’re coming with us, though.  Any idea where they put your claws?”

“Guard station, next corridor over.  Little shits were playin’ with ‘em.”

“Arcee—”

“My buddies are already on it.  We taking Deadweight to get Croc, or we splitting up?”

Turner puffs up angrily.  “Deadweight my ass!  Uncuff me, and—”

“Not gonna happen,” scoffs Flag.  “Arcee, you ‘n Boomerang Boy take Gaybar back topside while me, Jay, and—where the hell’s Jay?”

They all look around, then look at Lawton.

“The hell y’all look at me for?  I ain’t the man’s babysitter.”

Overhead, the intercom crackles to life.

~Paging Mmmiss Mercy Graves,~ Joker purrs.  ~One of your wardens would like to register a complaint about his wwwork environment.~

~Please, please,~ somebody else simpers.  ~Please, don’t kill me.  W-what do you want?  Why are you smiling like that?  What are you—~  And the broadcast trails off into blood curdling screams that can’t quite drown out gleeful cackles.

“Oof, so much for low profile,” snorts Ratcatcher.  A pair of rats bring her some wicked looking armored gloves.

“Fuck,” Flag grumbles.  “Well, let’s go get the Twin Masters of Unsubtlety.”

They all pile back into the elevator (Digger shoves Turner along, probably mostly to use him as a human shield should the need arise) and ride it down one more floor.

Joker is unlocking a set of handcuffs from Croc’s wrists.  Beside them, a motionless guard has had his shirt ripped open and the words ‘Joker was here’ cut into the skin of his torso.  “Passed out partway through, real disappointing,” Joker says.  “Hasn’t even lost that much blood…what a baby.”

“We need to leave before Graves finds us,” Flag says firmly.

“Rrrgh, you’re so boring!” growls Joker, metal teeth gleaming.

“You compromise this mission and you will absolutely not get a visit from Daddy,” Flag retorts.

Joker subsides to a pout and sulks his way onto the elevator.

Flag is dumb enough to think they’re fine now—that they’ve gotten away with it.

Then the cage of the elevator rises past some very serious stiletto heels and an equally serious sidearm, and Flag shoves their precious cargo behind Croc as he and Lawton open fire through the grating.  Graves dodges while returning fire with something that melts red-hot holes into the floor and the rear wall of the elevator (“Shitshitshit!” “You’re on my fucking foot, Captain Bonobo!” “Singed my damn suit—now I’m mad.”).  She empties the mag just as the elevator floor passes her head—she licks her middle finger and points with it.

“Got my eye on you, clown,” she calls after them.

“Try two; you’re a shit shot!” Joker retorts.

.End.