#terrible coloring but pls. disregard

[userscully]

This is a game about winning the points that matter. CHALLENGERS (2024, dir. Luca Guadagnino)

[notsocheezy]

Brain Curd #89

Brain Curds are lightly edited flash fiction - practically first drafts - posted daily and sometimes written with the express intention of being terrible… but, you know, in an endearing way. Please enjoy.

Read the rest of Government Man here on Tumblr!

Government Man sat perfectly still in his chair, at his desk, not moving, nor thinking; and barely breathing at that - but he was blinking, so he was most certainly alive.

The pneumatic tube in the corner delivered a canister, and he got up to retrieve it. He opened the canister to see a hand-written (more accurately described as hand-scribbled) note from Boss Man:

“pls see me at my office in ten mintuts”

Since that was not a word, Government Man had no choice but to assume it was a typo and meant to be the word, “minutes.” This was supported by the red squiggly line scrawled beneath it.

Government Woman sat in her chair, too, though her knees were where her head was supposed to be and her head was somewhere in the lap’s normal habitat. She heard the satisfying whoosh of her office’s tube, and fell out of her chair, sliding under her desk. She poked her head up over the edge. Her desk was full of jars with insects and arachnids in them, all living peacefully and in harmony. They were her pride and joy.

She went to the tube and opened her canister, which was much like a jar except without a cool bug in it. Inside was a hand-written note from Boss Man:

“do u like me? circle one - yes no maybe - also come to my office its important”

Both agents arrived at Boss Man’s office at approximately the same time, as Boss Man worked on coloring in a printed-out drawing with crayons. He noticed them come in and quickly hid all evidence of this in his desk drawer, which was full of similar half-colored illustrations.

“Good morning, Government Man. Government Woman.”

“Good Morning, Boss Man,” Government Man replied. “I hope I have not misinterpreted your note.”

Government Woman raised her eyebrows. “Did he send the same note to you, too?”

Government Man disregarded her question. “You did mean ‘ten minutes,’ correct?”

“Of course I did. That is what I wrote, is it not?”

Government Man showed him the paper. Boss Man squinted at it for a moment, then put on his reading glasses.

“Looks fine to me.”

Government Woman took a peek. “That is not how you spell ‘minutes’.”

“But Microsoft Word always corrects it to have the little squiggle line on it.” Boss Man rubbed his chin. “I do not believe you. Anyway, agents, I have an important mission for you today.”

Government Man put the note back in his coat pocket.

Boss Man continued. “There has been a breach at an extra-special-most-top-secret facility and an unknown quantity of government property is unaccounted for.”

Government Woman raised her hand. “How do we know what is missing if the quantity is unknown?”

“Because it is unaccounted for. Pay attention. Every third item is fitted with a tracking device, and all tracking devices point to one warehouse in particular. This means the items have yet to be re-sold on the black market, and they may still be retrieved. Your mission, agents, is to go to this location and secure the materials without looking at them.”

“Without looking at them?” Government Man asked.

“They will probably be covered in a blanket or towel. Nothing to worry about. As soon as you are sure it is safe, send word and some other agents will bring the items back where they belong.”

Government Woman furrowed her brow. “Why must we not look at them?”

Boss Man looked her in the eyes. “I have not been given a reason. Maybe it is because if you look at them, their beauty will make you regret that you are not allowed to have them for yourself.” Tears started forming in his eyes. “Please, agents, go!” He waved them away and began sobbing as soon as GM and GW closed the door behind them.

Government Man quipped, “He sure loves those secret items.”

Government Woman looked at him. “That is none of our business.”

They arrived at the warehouse, over in the industrial district. It was quiet, and seemingly unguarded. Government Man pulled out his gun anyway as they opened the squeaky unlocked side door. Government Woman shined a flashlight inside. The building was packed to the brim with large cylindrical objects, which were covered in blankets just as Boss Man had said they would be.

“Remember, Government Man. We are not supposed to look.”

“Of course,” he said, left hand over his eyes as his right pointed his gun into the warehouse.

Government Woman gently pushed his gun down. “There do not appear to be any enemy combatants. But this is very strange.”

“Why?”

“Exactly. Why? Why steal such large items only to abandon them?”

Government Man peeked through his fingers. “For fun?”

“Hmm.” Government Woman pondered.

A rat scurried by and Government Man immediately fired at it, missing by several yards and instead hitting one of the cylinders. It made a glass-shattering sound.

“Government Man!” GW yelled at him. “Put away your weapon! This is just like at the car wash!”

“Huh?” He scratched his head with the warm barrel of his firearm.

Government Woman took it from him and slammed the door shut. “We will stay out here and call for the moving crew.”

“Okay, I will send the message.”

Inside the warehouse, where it was too dark to see, the cylindrical object which took a bullet leaked a gelatinous blue fluid onto the floor. Even harder to see was the deep red blood swirled into it.

[des-draws]

it's officially July but I'm still on pride mode!!! can't stop won't stop

Here are my lgbt+/queer hcs for class 1(g)A(y)!!! Here's what they are in case you don't recognize all of the flags (bc let's be real before I started coloring this I wouldn't recognize at least a few of them either ;^; ), strap in bc it's going to get l o n g:

(also they’re listed in the order they’re shown in the deviantart post rather than this one oop)

- Ojiro is trans!! I feel like he prefers being stealth but still celebrates with all his classmates because it's such a special occasion :') - Tooru is pan and a demigirl!!! It's her first pride and she's hyped!!!! And full of love!!!!! Love Is Stored In The Tooru!!! - Todoroki is a gay demiboy!! His trauma has made his experience with gender rather vague and blurry but he's still happy to have a label to somehow describe himself!! He's using End*vor's credit card to buy all of his friends pride merch!! - Midoriya is bi and trans!! He's been so happy to see his friends discover themselves and even more so to see them celebrating :') - Iida is bi!! As the second of the three members of the Rich Kids Club, he also wants to support and reaffirm his friends by buying them pride stuff!! - Kirishima is gay and trans!! I hc that he's been basically the class' go-to for gender identity/sexuality stuff bc he's been out-and-proud since Day 1 until pretty much everyone had a big coming-out ("I'm gay!" "Cool! I think I might be bi! :0c" "I...might...not be a girl???" "I'm pretty sure I'm [ace/genderfluid/etc.]" "What's that?" "Oh, it's [...]" "...might have to look into that. I think it might fit me too?" " :'D !!!!! " ) (he probably cried bc he was so proud of everyone) and then things calmed down a bit . He's a tinsy bit sad ppl no longer come to him for it but he pushes it down because he's just so!!!!!! happy to be surrounded by so many ppl like him!! - Bakugou is gay, trans and demisexual!! The last part was the hardest for him to figure out and he spent a lot of time being confused at other people, it was when Sero shared his own orientations that he thought maybe he wasn't as alone as he had thought :') - Uraraka is bi!! She's spent years thinking her crushes on girls were just her being jealous/wanting to be friends with them/not as important/stong as the crushes she's had on boys. She's getting over that internalized stuff now and I'm proud of her!! - Tsuyu is a trans girl and a lesbian!! She's been very open about wanting people to call her "Tsuyu-chan" because she chose that name herself!! And she's so happy that everyone here is supportive of her and each other!! - Yaomomo is also a lesbian!! This is her first pride, she's so excited to see all these people with different identities and experiences come together, and while she could easily create pride merch herself she much rather prefers supporing the indepentent LGBT+/Queer creators selling their own! (Hence why she bought two different variations of the lesbian flag for both her and Jirou!) (and probably many more of the stuff you see everyone wearing lol) - (Speaking of,) Jirou is also also a lesbian and also nonbinary!! Her only connection to girlhood is her love for other girls, but other than maybe updating her wardrobe a little she doesn't mind presenting femininely. - Sero is asexual, demiromantic and genderflux!! He's v. chill about everything, he probably found out and was like "Oh. Ok cool. I'm hungy" like he has a very laid-back attitude abt his identity/orientation but he Will defend his friends' to hell and back. Group mom heck yea - Kaminari is bi and nonbinary!! He was scared shitless to the point of losing sleep when he started figuring out that he miiiight like boys too, and even more so when he realised he might not even be a boy?? Thankfully being surrounded by so many supportive people (and having Kirishima as one of his closest and more trustworthy friends) helped him accept himself :') - Mina is pan and trans!! She's always been very open about being a Romantic™ but rather than being the Disaster Pan that gets flustered around everyone, she's the Disaster Pan that flirts shamelessly using Terrible pick up lines ("If we were dating...heh.....let's just say horses wouldn't be called horses anymore ;) " was the first ever thing she said to Kirishima, which earned her an extremely confused and somewhat flustered "I'm????ga y???? ???????" (it was the first time he'd admitted it out loud so he kinda thanks her for that) ) - Tokoyami is bi and trans!! A while back I read a fic that happened to have trans Tokoyami in it and was like "You know what. Yeah I can see it!" Emo culture is probably what helped him realize, with it playing around with and disregarding gender stereotypes and everything. - Aoyama is transmasculine, genderfluid and aromantic!! For the longest time he'd much rather have people mistake him for a feminine/gnc boy rather than a girl. It took him a while to come to terms with his aromanticism, since pretty much everyone expected him to be gay- he kinda expected it himself too, since he never liked girls that way, so?? But when he found out about the term "aromantic" it was like a weight lift off his shoulders. - Shoji is netrois and androsexual!! He knew he liked boys early but he's avoided dealing with figuring out his gender out of fear that he'd be disappointed- he's only ever seen nonbinary/genderqueer people depicted as androgynous and much smaller in stature than himself, so he thought he'd never fit. Seeing everyone else come out (especially the other nonbinary classmates of his), he stopped hesitating and starting working on coming to terms with himself!! - Satou is asexual and panromantic!! I don't really have much reasoning for this, I never really thought about it (or Satou himself) but when the time came to draw this I was like "Satou likes baking.....and puns are ace culture......FOOD PUNS!!! OF COURSE!!!" I'm sorry glkjhklhfdlkhj; - Koda is a trans boy!! He's had trouble recognizing it at the start because he's always been soft-spoken (almost nonverbal) and timid and kind, and """"those aren't traits of a boy""""" but he was so happy when he hit puberty and started growing So Much in stature due to his genes and people started "mistaking" him for a boy!! He came out to his parents almost immediately bc compassion and kindness seems to run in the family and he knew he'd be accepted even if they didn't completely understand!! He was more scared to come out to his classmates but when two, three, four of them come out and are accepted for being trans boys, he knows he'll be safe with them too. - And finally, last but not least, Aizawa is gay and trans!! He might act somewhat aloof about this stuff, but secretly he's very happy that his kids students all have eachother's support, and most of them their families'. Part of him is a little bitter and wishes he had the same kind of support system in their age, but he's going to be there for them if they need him nonetheless. He has his own support system now, and that matters a lot, too.

But wait!! There's M O R E !!!!! - I always love love LOVE how fanartists/editors give some of the characters more animal-like features, so I did that too!!! I went Full-on-Frog with Tsuyu (and I'm rather proud of how she came out (lol) ), but also I gave Mina some Sharp Chompers and a Fluffy lil' tail bc It's What She Deserves, and Ojiro a lil' toof poking out and ears that sharpen a lil bit at the tips? I hc that as he grows, other than his tail he'll start growing more animal features like that- sharper teeth, longer ears, claws and also, get ready.....pawbeans........the last ones give him Heck when they start growing out, and he needs his palms massaged at least once a day while they do :'( His legs get weird too and they end up looking more like a wolf's back legs :0c - I gave a lot of them freckles!!!! bc I Love Freckles!!!!!! also, as my sister very eloquently pointed out, I gave Uraraka "A R M S,,,,," bc. let's be honest. the girl got martial training she's not a twig - Sero is holding the polyamorous flag behind himself, Kaminari and Mina bc.. u guessed it,, they're all dating each other,,,,, lotsa smooches and cuddling and shenanigans bc there's only maybe one(1) braincell between the three of them and most of the time sero has it - Todoroki, Midoriya, Iida, Kirishima, Bakugou, Tsuyu, Yaomomo, Koda and Aizawa are also autistic. Yes all of them. No I won't explain. (unless you ask in good faith and want to share your own hcs pls ask me then I'll explain everything and you can expect it to be as long as this description!!!!!) (I might draw something about it when it's April again maybe *thinking emoji* ) - Oh!!! and Tooru, Kaminari and Mina are ADHD. Kirishima is also dyslexic. - Bakugou has been losing his hearing ever since he entered U.A.- sure he's always used his quirk but never freely to that extend and with so much power behind it, so getting into fight after fight with such close proximity to explosions that big really did a number on his ears. He can hear a little better with the right one than the left, so Kirishima has gotten used to walking by his right side before his custom hearing aids came in, and then just stuck to that. Bakugou's custom hearing aids block out any noise above a certain volume bc let's assume technology has advanced to do that. When he and Kirishima started thinking about working together as heroes even after they graduate, Bakugou requested custom ear protectors with similar block-out features as his hearing aids for Kirishima so his ears aren't damaged by working so close to Bakugou (Kirishima cried). - I'm actually quite flexible on which of the two I hc as trans, or if I hc both of them to be. The "both gay + demi Bkg" is pretty set in my interpretation of them, but I find it interesting how their friendship/relationship could manifest and grow somewhat differently depending on if both of them are trans or if only one of them (and depending on which one of them it is). They're still the same loud rowdy boyes we know and love but there's different conversations to have and difficulties to tackle between them based on that factor alone, and frankly? I Adore It.

Okay that's all!!!! I think. Thanks for reading, if you did!! And if not, I completely understand lol

I hope you had a great pride month!!

[callmeminseok]

@plt1127 asked me to answer all of the nct questions so here they are!! under the cut <3

The 7th Sense or Firetruck? the 7th sense invented innovation

Who’s your bias? Winwin!! my bb :(

Bias wrecker? taeyong? or yuta, i have a soft spot for renjun too 

When did you start liking SMROOKIES/NCT? A month or two before Limitless

Favorite vocalist? Doyoung has the absolutely most fantastic voice imo

Favorite dancer? Ten :( where is he :(

Favorite rapper? Marky mark (HSR really did him wonders I think)

Favorite NCT Life in Seoul episode? akjnsdfksn the first one where kun is rly awkward with doyoung and jaehyun jansdjkf iconic

Favorite NCT Life in Bangkok episode? umm i cried when ten met his teachers??????? like....rly cried

Favorite ship? yutae is so pure tbh but my heart is with nct/winwin,,...he’s truly the xiuharem of nct

Dance-line or Vocal-line? Vocal vocal vocal nct has such good vocals

Vocal-line or Rap-line? rap line 

Cute Taeyong or Sexy Taeyong? i guess sexy?? really...both are good but taeyong on stage is so special

Favorite member that hasn’t debuted? K U N my man....bias wrecker in the shadows.....waiting

What song are you most excited about on the mini album? well limitless is out but I’ll say that Back 2 U is everything

Favorite ‘The 7th Sense’ stage? from the comeback show music core but that one they did in feb in the sparkly suits.......iconic...i missed ten so much

Long hair Ten or short hair Ten? long :( bb

Curly haired Jaehyun or straight haired Jaehyun? c u r l y

What hair color do you prefer on Taeyong? black.....it just..looks correct

What concept do you wish that NCT would try next? i want nct 127 to try something 90s ish or just less pseudo hip hop streetwear like.....put on some pastels or somethin lkmasklfm nct dream i wanna see in sweaters like exo’s xmas comebacks :(

If you could choose the next sub-unit to debut, who would it be? lmfao um nct china ft all my mens.....im hollering at the thought of promotions with winwin kun and renjun and chenle....like..... pl e ase

Most underrated member? taeil? vocals of the century? i think he’s frequently overlooked bc he’s so reserved, also somehow haechan i feel like is disregarded as a vocalist :/

Most likely to get a solo debut? lmfao taeyong......he’s really gonna be taemin but ft rap there’s gonna be a new mini every year for taeyong

Would you rather see NCT on Running Man or Weekly Idol? i dont really care that much for nct on weekly idol their appearances on it are......underwhelming?? like the hosts spend too much time pointing out how weak nct is at variety lmfao but i think they’d be great on running man

If you choose our fandom name, what would it be? god who wants that job maybe techies? that’s terrible lmfao nctechies im laughing NCT-L final answer

First bias? whose first bias wasnt taeyong tbh

How long did it take you to learn all their names? technically i still haven’t bc i really dont know all of the rookies, but of those who debuted i think a week or two 

Who do you want to see NCT collaborate with? exo~ lay, specifically I’d love to see nct china line with lay

Favorite fancam? the one from gayo daejeon where mark runs from his chewing gum stage to the 7th sense lmfao

Once Again or Switch? Switch

If you could choose where NCT Life Season 3 is filmed, where would you choose and why? Beijing or Tokyo, I want to see the other foreign members be happy to be in their country and be comfortable sharing it w the rest of nct like ten did (i esp want this for yuta :( )

Where do you see NCT in a year? wildly overworked, full album for 127, debut of at least one more unit, and a mini for dream 

Which member has the best fashion sense? i dont trust a single one of them.....but probably mark

Has NCT ever made you cry? yep :-) i am overwhelmed w pride 24/7

How did you discover NCT? u know that clip of xiumin and mark from mickey mouse club....here we are now

Favorite teaser pic? jisung’s first and last teaser pic.....it’s truly a work of art

Bassbot or 0701 dance practice? 0701 tbh

Most handsome member? Jaehyun

Favorite pre-debut photo? all of chenle’s predebut pics

Did you pre-order the mini-album? no :(

Cutest member? winwin~ and renjun

Sexiest member? taeyong no butts about it

Member you want to bring home to your mom? winwin im sorry this is so......repetitive i rly just love him

If you had NCT in class, what member would you most likely sit next to? taeil or doyoung....their vibes are calming and the type that i usually look for 

What member are you closest to in age? winwin only bc jaehyun is a full year older than me and winwin is only 4 months older and im a year older than mark

What member are you closest to in height? Jeno/Haechan 

If you had to choose your ideal type, who would it be? .............winwin