#technically today cause it’s 2 am but we’re gonna freaking see!

[elliesbelle]

alright. y’all just might get chapter 12 of ncty tomorrow.

[blackgirlalmighty]

Personal vent post incoming I don’t know how to do a read more on mobile I’m sorry:

I’m so sick of struggling like this. I am so broke all the fucking time and I feel like a failure and a loser and a shitty person bc my younger autistic sibling is my dependent and we’re barely making it. He was denied disability. We have no parents to live with or ask for help. They’re dead. Grandparents are dead too. I work full time and technically ‘make too much’ for food stamps or rent assistance or utility assistance

I can barely focus cause I’m so stressed out all the time. I have no motivation no energy to do anything even things that make me happy. My health is in the shitter and some days (like today) I’m literally shaking from not having enough to eat. I am in fucking eating disorder recovery and I have to lie to my care team about how much I’m eating because the answer isn’t that I’m purposely restricting it’s that I can’t afford groceries for two people every week.

It’s not always this urgently bad. Today I am freaking out because I am super short on rent and we have very very little food in the house and I have no idea what I’m gonna fucking do. I’ve texted a friend and an older brother (who literally just got out of homelessness himself) out of desperation but they’re not getting back to me yet. I just don’t know what to do anymore. Every single plan and plan B and plan C I had in place this entire year to try to carry us through financially either fell through or some bullshit happened that cleaned me out, starting with when we moved and the movers charged me $400 over what they told me initially and put my account negative and started the shitty chain reaction I’ve been fighting off all year. Every 2 weeks my account goes negative before I get my check. Every single month electric company is sending me a disconnect notice that I just barely beg them to let me pay a tiny bit of the balance to last me until the next one.

Finally started getting my feet under me a little in September then my fucking car broke down, $2k repair bill. Over $300 a month to pay that off with no ability to change the amount. That took every single cent of my yearly piddly raise and then some.

Then 2 weeks ago my cat starts pissing blood. Banfield can’t see her so she gets rushed to urgent care vet and thankfully she’s okay now but that was $400. The last of my teeny tiny cushion I had to try to prepare for days like today.

I’ve pulled from my 401k as much as I’m legally able. I’ve borrowed from friends and relatives who barely have anything themselves. My younger sibling had a tiny inheritance from his grandma and that’s almost completely gone now which breaks my fucking heart.

Where do we go from here? What the fuck am I supposed to do? Do we just get evicted and try to find a shelter? Do I sell off everything I own? Everyone around me seems to have their shit together and I feel like I’m drowning and drowning and drowning. My mom died and trusted my sibling’s care to me and I feel like I’ve let her down.

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

🤔🥰👏😭😭👏🥰🥰😭😭😭OKAY OKAY OKAY I’M BACK

TOOK ME A HOT MINUTE BC TIS THE LIFE OF A PROCRASTINATOR (just bc I had other things to do) AND OVER-ACHIEVER BUT! HERE WE ARE.

Alright now I was just gonna say that 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Anyway, yes I’m having feelings, no I don’t really remember them, and yes this will have less emojis than it would have given that I’m on the computer and not my phone so this goes faster xDD.

ANYWAY

Also I was gonna say (finally remembered it lol) at the time, well I did say out loud, after laughing: ANDREA NOOO HE’S DYING YOU CAN’T DO THAT XDD

But technically it was for when he recovered lol, not while he was still dying, so we’re good XD. Especially because she’s being protective and I just love that in people and characters, especially (especially) because she’s been protective over CARLOS cause just CARLOS, and also especially (especially [especially]) because it’s funny xDD.

Anyway!

Onto the summary, the reaction over all :D.

If you will, it’s time for the:

REVIEW

Alright, so, overall: I. ABSOLUTELY. A D O R E D. THIS EPISODE. :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Now, it may just be because of the Tarlos and Grace (and Judd, obviously), but this is probably my favorite episode this Season so far :)).

Seriously though, I am living my best life. If I had the energy, I might even write a Tarlos talking fic myself. Now, I don’t, not right now, nor the time, which is why I apologize if this is a shorter review than other episodes, which it probably will be - it’s been an hour and a half since the show ended, I can’t use emojis as easily so I get a little less distracted lol, and I’m just less sucked/zeroed in to my phone since like, idk, I’m just more in the environment, and like, aware xDD. Another reason for a shorter review is that I got my covid vaccine booster today, and, as the wonderful words of the amazingly wise mas said/state, that booster sure can covid. In short, I’m gradually feeling worse and worse, so, uh xdd. This is distracting me a little though, so let’s continue on with it :). Lol, maybe it won’t be a shorter review, but certainly less about the episode xD. Maybe not, idk yet, lol.

And also like I said I’m not freaking out as much anymore LOL XD. Well, I mean because of the whole, it ended 90+ minutes ago (100 actually - well, 99 technicallyyyyyy. . . Okay I’m waiting for it to hit 100 but it might actually be a minute lol because I was looking at the clock and it was at like 40 seconds so- ope no the computer switched like half a minute ago as I was typing this lol I just wanted to finish typing, lol ANYWAY, 100 xDD), but, anyway lol.

Okay, so, first off, Grace and Judd (and Billy, obviously).

THEY ARE SO CUTE  😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. Like literally I love them soo much 😭😭😭 xDD. Seriously though, we’ve once again revisited (grammar haha) the fact that Grace tries to do everything on her own. Well, maybe not everything, for example, she’s not trying to have this baby on her own lol (well, the actual birth sure, but xdd). I know that in Season 2 it talked about this in relation to the standards black women and other women of color are held to in today’s society, and I do think that’s very important to talk about, but I think I’ll let a few more of you talk about it more in-depth instead, seeing as I’m white xdd. I do get the pressure to want to do things on your own, though - I think that’s something a lot of people can relate to, no matter what their situation is. But, nonetheless, I thought the scenes of her and Judd were really cute, and I’m just glad they’re all okay :)). And I am so, So, SO, SOOO HAPPY THAT JUDD MADE IT FOR THE BIRTH :DDDDDDD 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 :D :D :D :D :D. It just- yes, it was wonderful.

Now. Owen. You know what I’m gonna say, methinks.

STOP 👏 MAKING 👏 EVERYTHING 👏 ABOUT 👏 YOU 👏!!!!!! 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏!!!

Like, sure, I liked your sadness about TK (my BOYYYYYYYY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭), and I did like your comparison, just bc I know you were actually sad and really, really very scared, specifically for him and yourself, but nonetheless, it’s s t i l l  n o t  a l l  a b o u t  y o u. But I will let it slide this time, as it’s all in juxtaposition to TK.

And oh my gosh his hug to Carlos 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. I thought I would literally lose my mind xddd XDDDD 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. And just- one more tear from Carlos, everyone being there, the comfort of that hug, Owen just finally seeing the pain of someone around him and CARING and helping him through it, I just- I can’t 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 xDD. I love them so, so much. Well, mostly Carlos, and TK if we’re including him here, but Owen’s aight. Lol, anyway, also Marjan having to find out 😭😭😭😭? Literally killed me. I mean, it really would have if we would’ve had to SEE it, but luckily we didn’t. Still kinda wish we did though xDD. And of course her being surprised about Paul - glad they assuaged her fears rather quickly, because she was still calm in that moment, I feel like - or at least in control of her emotions. Anyway, glad that we finally got to see the rest of them there with TK 🥰🥰🥰🥰. Or at least some of them anyway.

But! Yeah. I think you now what time it is. Time for. . .

T A R L O S !!!

You knew it had to be coming eventually xDD.

OKAY! So, as y’all well know if you follow me or follow what I’m doing here, like my posts, you know I LOVE Tarlos. I mean, I think most of us do xDD. And like- this episode 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. Literally I can’t deal. I was stimming. SO. HARD. It’s been a long time since I’ve stimmed like that and- yeah, it was nice :). I REALLY wish I had the energy to say more about them right now. . . I’ll do a little more, but then I really have to go - I get up in 7 hours and I have most likely at least 30 minutes of school left lol. OKAY took a quick break but we back <3. I am definitely not letting this be the smallest, or even second biggest, section XDD. Anyway, yeah, I just- it was really lovely and wonderful to feel such feelings that I stimmed like that again, and it was really great <3. With a recent re-hyperfixation at some really epic parts I’ve been able to stim a little, like, naturally, but this is just a whole new/’nother level :). I was literally kicked my legs up in the air and flinging my arms around lol xD. Like, those legs were 90 degree angles because I was mostly lying down on the cough XD. I just- I love them so, so much. That final, well more like FINALLY, culminative I suppose, handholding and kissing and cuddling at the end 😭😭😭😭😭. Like, when TK woke up I mean - although obviously we’ll talk about the apartment and the ending-ending in a minute xDD. It was like, he was so worn down that as soon as he felt like it was okay to hold his hand, the dam broke for Carlos and he couldn’t handle not touching TK, being close to him, supporting him, loving him. I am, in short, VERY emotional 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭xdd. Just- 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰. I LOVE THEM. SO. M U C H. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3. They are perfect (not literally) and- oh my gosh, Ronen and Rafa did SUCH 👏 A 👏 GOOD 👏 JOB 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏!!!!!! I just- I love them so much. Later I will be posting my betting pool between me and the lovely @mas (yes I know that’s not your account/blog name lol I just don’t care <3 <3 <3 xDD) on why the broke up lol, or the whole situation in general - we were both pretty close 🤔!!!! Okay, real quick, just as a last thing or two here, the apartment: it is so beautiful. I really do hope we eventually get at least a little talk, a little on-screen explanation from TK on why he acted the way he did, and while personally I think it was a little much to break up, I also kinda get it. He’s not used to having nice things :’(((((( (I believe I saw someone else say something along those lines and it is %1,000 true in my opinion 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭, if not all the time). I also saw someone say they honestly would’ve preferred if it was Carlos who had made the mistake, whether it was him or TK who actually did the breaking-up with, I believe, but honestly I don’t really care. I think we’ll see more mistakes from Carlos in the future (that was their reasoning), and while I don’t like the fact that TK has to make so many mistakes, he’s been through a lot and I feel like that was the only logical storyline to make the break up fit. Sure, do I wish they hadn’t ever broken up? Yeah! But also, kinda not. TV’s not perfect - in the wise words of Abed Nadir, “It needs to be okay for TV to take a sick day. Or phone in a day.” The show isn’t gonna be perfect - I agree with and acknowledge that. But, to me at least, it’s so very, very good <3. TK will keep making mistakes. So will Carlos. Hopefully, they won’t break up ever again - I really don’t think that’s likely, to be honest, luckily. I love them so, so much, and I think they’ll be okay.

Now, the ending party. Yes <3. I got a special little thrill and :’) of happiness at Mateo ringing the bell, because this is his first time entering that fire house, officially at least, as a full-fledged Fire Fighter. So proud of him <3 <3 <3 :’’’)))))))) 😭😭👏👏👏👏👏👏🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰. I just- I love him, I love them all :))))))). Also, yes, stan Paul and his new rich sponsor family <3 <3 <3 xDD. And yes, I was so happy that Gwyn was there 😭😭😭😭. Sure, TK, you may eventually have to admit - to her or to your therapist, I don’t know lol - that you saw her in your coma dream(scape), but for right now, I think it’s just good for you to see the real her :). She supported you through a hard time, and she’s hear to REALLY support you. You know, as a real person xD. And, support everyone of course, but mostly him, and Owen, I think :)). I mean, I know, but I’m sure she cares about the others too xdd. And TK’s little brother, her son 😭😭😭😭😭. I don’t remember his name, but I just- he is adorable. THEY are adorable - Gwyn with him, TK with him, whatever. Glad Owen wasn’t too weird or salty about it :’). Also having Baby Ryder (Charlie!!!!!! Love that so much 😭😭😭 :))) :’)) <3 <3 <3 <3 :pppppp :pp :pp :p) and Gwyn’s second son all (well, there’s two, but, you know, lol xD) around at the same time, it’s just fun and interesting :). Even if she and him (Gwyn and the kid) won’t be here too often, I assume :). And yes - quick note, again, CHARLIE IS SUCH AN AWESOME NAME 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. You mind your business, Evie (I believe it was her, lol xDD) - that’s a wonderful and kick-butt girl’s name 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰. And it’s just so, so sweet 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 :’’’)))))))))))).

Anyway, that’s about it!

Overall: I absolutely loved this episode. I adored it. Owen wasn’t too bad, we got to see everyone at least a little bit, and the fire house is back up :). Maybe the ending was a bit quick, but honestly, it’s time that we move on from this storyline lol. It makes sense to wrap it all up right now :). Honestly, I was afraid it would end with a cliffhanger, or like, even if it happened offscreen, a kind of open ending, TK woke up and Tarlos is about to talk scene, but nOPE, we got much better :)). This was an amazing episode, so lovely, from Grace and Judd being amazing as always, to Billy, who was slightly less annoying than usual 🤔. You gotta admit he’s funny though, lol, xD. Ah, I love him. Well, maybe. Probably not as much as the rest of them, but I’m just in a happy mood right now XD. So yeah, I’ll love him :)). The team was adorable and loving, Tarlos hurt so much but ended happily, and it hurt in a good way, since it was amazing <3, Tommy might’ve finally forgiven herself for TK’s accident, :), Nancy helped Carlos open up a little bit, it wasn’t all about Owen, and little baby Charlie Ryder came into the world :)). And, of course, finally: The 126 Firehouse opened back up. Such an lovely ending. A great ending for an exciting episode arc :DD :D. I’m psyched to see more :)))))) 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰. I loved it <3. This was an amazing episode :’).

Sooooo, yeah!!

This was my review for. . .

9-1-1: Lone Star, Season 3, Episode 4: Push

Next week!!! I’m so excited for :))). . .

9-1-1: Lone Star, Season 3, Episode 5: Child Care

See you then!!!! :DDDDDD!!!!

[icantthinkofanythingcool3]

Hii I saw ur post about short blurbs and was wondering if you could do 5 or 13 🤍🤍

Well this did not end up being short 🤦‍♀️ but here ya go! Hope you enjoy!💜

It had been 2 years since y/n had moved away from Beacon Hills and half of her friends. Kira and y/n had ended up at the same college and in the same dorm. Lydia and Stiles both ended up about a half hour from them in different directions. The group was still close, but things were definitely different for all of them. Kira and Scott had grown apart and Scott and Malia had grown closer. Lydia and y/n had grown closer than before, they were always going back and forth on the weekends visiting with each other. Although y/n and Stiles were really close before, things had simmered down right before they left for school two years ago.

All their friends had sworn that the two were going to be together, even with college coming up. They were going to school close enough where they could totally still pursue a relationship. Somewhere though, Stiles and y/n had ‘grown apart’. At least that’s what their friends thought. In reality, neither of them really knew what had happened. It was like one moment they were falling for each other and the next it was just gone. Y/n and Stiles had both tried on different occasions to talk to each other, but something always got in the way.

Y/n walked into her apartment, that Kira was decorating...for Valentine's Day. “UGHHHHHH. Kira I thought we decided not to make a big deal out of this stupid holiday.”

“No...you decided that. Just because you’re still stuck on Stiles, doesn’t mean everyone else can’t be happy about love.” Kira announced.

“That’s not-no you’re. Ugh, whatever.” y/n replied, not having a come back, because what she had said was true.

y/n was still really hung up on Stiles, she was still so confused about what had happened to them back in Beacon Hills. There had been plenty of times since then that Lydia, Kira, y/n and Stiles had gotten together to hang out, even times when Scott and the others had come down to visit. However, their interactions were always strange and confusing. She hadn’t been able to date anyone else, and was honestly just making herself super unhappy.

“Before you make yourself too depressed, this was slipped under the door for you today.” Kira handed her a note, folded up with a huge heart on one side and y/n on the other.

“What...what is this?”

“I don’t know silly, clearly I haven’t opened it...since it’s for you…”

Y/n’s eyes rolled as the note was opened. It was typed and it read:

"When love is not madness it is not love." –Pedro Calderon de la Barca.

I have felt nothing but madness from the moment I laid eyes on you.

As she read it to Kira, she let out a screech, “y/n!!!!! Omg you totally have a secret admirer! This is so EXCITING!”

However y/n was doubtful, she left Kira to go to her room. Who on Earth could have sent this to her? Was it a joke? Was it real? The next day, nothing appeared under the door and it disappointed y/n, even though they would never admit that, especially to Kira!

The next day however, when y/n got home from work Kira was waiting impatiently by the door with a note in her hands. It looked exactly like the other one. She basically threw it in my face and stood over my shoulder as she repeated ‘open it, open it, open it’ in my ear.

This one read:

“Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.” – Jules Renard. This, I can assure you, is true. I make dumb mistakes every time I’m around you.

“I literally have no idea who could be doing this. I don’t talk to anyone, no one even notices me around here!” y/n exclaimed, confused.

“Well, you must be wrong, because someone is DEFINITELY noticing you!!!!”

“No, this is just wrong. This has got to be a joke or something. I’m telling you. Throw away any other ones, I’m serious.” With that, y/n walked into her room and slammed the door, she was done with this.

The next day was normal, but y/n wasn’t hopeful that she wouldn’t get another letter, and the next day, the 5th of February, Kira was waiting again with another note.

“You are my heart, my life, my one and only thought.” – Conan Doyle. You are the only thing I can think about lately, you’re in my every thought.

y/n didn’t know what to think anymore. Was this person a freaking psycho stalker? How did they know where I lived? We’re they stalking me?

“Kira, I know that you’re sitting here thinking this is some romantic love story...but what if this is some crazy stalker that now knows where we live? Like what if they break in and kill us in the middle of the night?”

“y/n I think you’re being a little dramatic. I feel like this is someone that has to know you in some way. This is some intense shit.”

“We’re gonna die...watch.” y/n finished, over the anxiety this was causing her.

Two days later, y/n didn’t have class. She was going back and forth from the front door, to her room. She was stuck between being excited and worried. Half of her believed that this was some kind of cruel joke, the other half thought maybe someone actually did like her. By 4 o’clock, she thought maybe that it was over, but as she made her way out of there room, there was a note by the door.

"Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back." - Plato. This one may be corny, but it’s true, I feel this with you.

This definitely sounded like someone that knew her. But how could she be so oblivious? How could there be someone this into her and she had no idea. That’s why she still believed that this could be a joke. Like clockwork, two days later she got another note.

“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” – Dr. Seuss. I swear since I started these notes, I haven’t been able to sleep at all. I know this is probably starting to creep you out, I promise that you know me and I know you. I’m not a random person.

“I’m sure that this is supposed to make me feel better Kira, but I feel worse. How do I not know this person likes me, if they like me this much?”

“Well, I’ve been thinking from the beginning of this, do you think it could be Stiles?”

“WHAT?” y/n asked incredulously, “Come on, there’s no way. First of all, that would mean he would have to drive a half hour here and back every other day to slip these under the door? There’s no way, that would be crazy.”

“I mean, you guys definitely had something and then suddenly you guys just stopped. You’re still awkward around each other, maybe this is the only way he can get you back?”

“No. Seriously. Stop that’s, that’s. No, that's crazy.” But later that night, what Kira said had gotten the best of y/n. She did something she hadn’t done in a while, she called Stiles.

As soon as he answered, y/n regretted it, “y/n? Are you okay? Did something happen?”

“No, no nothing’s wrong. Sorry, I’m not even sure why I called…...I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize for calling, you know.”

“Yeah, sorry- shit I mean okay. I-I gotta go talk to you later.” And she hung up, she felt so stupid why would she call him? Kira and these damn notes have gotten her head all twisted up. She should know better than to think Stiles could have done this, she was getting her hopes up just thinking about it.

Two days later, y/n could hardly think at work. Her mind was all in a swirl and she kept making mistakes and dropping shit, by the end of her shift she was exhausted. As she had expected, when she got home, Kira was sitting on the couch, holding a new note.

“Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.” – Rumi. I haven’t known you forever, but when I met you it was like I had known you my whole life.

“There’s only three days left until Valentine's Day. What’s going to happen? Is this all leading up to something? Or are the notes just going to stop?”

“I guess that’s the fun part!” But when y/n looked at her pointedly she continued, “I know this is freaking you out and giving you anxiety, but this could be a good thing. Whoever it is, really cares about you. And I’m not getting creepy vibes from any of this, if someone was going to break in and kill us, I think they already would have.”

y/n knew that Kira was right, she shouldn’t be so freaked out about this. It didn’t seem like a creepy kind of thing, the notes were sweet and heartfelt, and they definitely, probably would have already been killed. So all y/n could do was wait.

As y/n made her way through the day before Valentine’s hazily, she could barely focus. She kept texting Kira, asking if she had found anything yet. Seeing as she was still in class, she had not. Y/n wanted nothing more than to leave her classes and go to the apartment, but she knew if the note wasn’t there yet, she would get even more impatient. So when Kira finally texted her that she got home and there was a note, y/n excused herself from her class and rushed home. Kira was waiting, almost as impatiently as y/n, with the note in her hand!

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” – Lao Tzu. Meet me at Hilton tomorrow, 7PM, there’ll be a note left at the front desk.

“What? Kira, am I really supposed to just go to this random hotel and meet this random person?”

“I mean they said you know them, so they’re not that random!”

“I know a lot of people! It could be the cute barista that gets my coffee everyday! I technically know him, but would I go into a random hotel room with him? NO.”

“Okay, then I drive you there, and you keep me on the phone. If anything funky happens I’ll run up and save your ass. I think you should go. I see the look in your eyes when you read the notes, you’re excited. I haven’t seen you genuinely excited in a long time.”

Kira had saved my life multiple times, I trusted her, and it was a good plan. I was excited, she was right, I was stupid for thinking that I would get it past her. And I wasn’t exactly defenseless, I had learned to fight through many years of fighting off the supernatural. I decided it couldn't hurt, if anything it would end up a good story to tell one day.

The next day was torture waiting for 7pm. Especially since y/n had no class and only finding an outfit to distract her. y/n called Lydia in the morning, while Lydia had been pissed that she’d only just heard about this, she insisted on y/n video chatting her to pick an outfit. Together, they had decided on a blush pink dress, with a small flower design. There was a belt that tied right under the chest, that accentuated the top of y/n’s body and flowed down nicely to a little above the knee. They picked out black kitten heels, which according to Lydia, y/n should have already had. It was 4:30 when she got home, already ready to start her makeup to keep her distracted. Kira helped her do her hair nicely and put on minimal makeup, to highlight her best features. By 6, y/n was ready to get in the car, but the drive was only 15 minutes. Kira tried to distract her with finding things to fix, like an out of place hair, or too much highlight. At 6:30, she couldn’t distract her anymore and they got in the car. She drove slowly, constantly trying to hit red lights. Although, y/n had noticed, she pretended not, too.

Freaking out at 6:50, y/n got out of the car by the entrance. Looking at Kira who gave her a thumbs up, y/n walked in and to the front desk.

“Hi, um, I was told there was a note going to be left for me here?”

“Ahh, you must be y/n, yes?” The desk attendant said to me, smiling brightly.

“Yes, that is me!” I said, nervously.

“Here is the note, don’t be so nervous. I think you’ll like what is waiting for you!”

She looked at the note that looked the same as all the other ones. The note said:

Go to hotel room #33.

y/n double checked that Kira was still on the phone and went up the elevator to the correct floor. She walked up to the door, but was hesitant to knock. It took her a full minute and many deep breaths to finally knock. When the door opened, she gasped at what she saw.

“Stiles?” She asked incredulously.

“Hi, y/n. I was nervous you weren’t going to come.”

y/n looked down at her phone to see that Kira had already hung up, “I-I, the notes were you the whole time?”

“Yes, I’m sorry, I didn’t know how else to do it. I was freaking out about the whole thing. I know things got messed up before and honestly, I don’t even know why. I didn’t want to mess up again, and I just thought this was the best way to get you to see that I was sorry.”

Y/n took a minute to look around the room. There were two queen beds, both covered in rose petals. There was a small, pink and red bag on one of them. There were actually rose petals everywhere. There were small candles lit all over the room, lights turned down. There was a bottle of champagne on ice and room service on a trolley that contained y/f/flowers in a beautiful vase. It was beautiful honestly, and clearly took a lot of thought.

“y/n?” Stiles started, as she had not said anything after his confession.

“I’m sorry, it’s- I mean this is beautiful. It’s amazing honestly. I can’t believe you did all of this.”

“I’ve loved you for a long time y/n. And I don’t know how exactly we got all fucked up, but I was nervous and scared about what would come to us when school started. I’ve wanted to tell you everyday since that whatever was going on was stupid and that we should be together, but I never could get it out and I’m sorry.” Stiles was nervous, not sure y/n felt the same.

“I don’t know what happened either, if I’m being honest..I felt the same. Scared and nervous. I’ve literally made myself miserable everyday, knowing that I should have done something about what happened. I love you. I’m sorry too, that I didn’t do anything to fix whatever happened. I knew from the moment I met you, that we were meant to be more than just friends.”

Stiles couldn’t hold back after he heard y/n’s confession, his feelings had been overwhelming for so long. He walked closer to her, placed his hand on her face gently, and placed his lips on hers. At first, it was sweet and slow, but y/n moved her hands to the back of his head, pulling him closer. When they both ran out of breath, they pulled away smiling at each other.

“Can I ask you a question?” y/n spoke first.

“Of course, anything.” Stiles answered.

“Why are there two beds?” y/n wiggled her eyebrows.

Stiles face turned red and his hand went to rub his chin, “I well, I mean I didn’t want to-uh...I didn’t want to assume anything, I just, I didn’t want to mess anything else.”

“Well I don’t think we’ll be needing it.” y/n said and pulled Stiles back to her, placing her lips on his again.

[twinkleomorashi]

Day 2 Desk Wetting

Day 2 Desk Wetting ( Junior Year Preston) 

AN: Yeah big shock, Preston again. It is technically day 2 after all so I managed to get this done just 4 minutes too late lol.

All characters in sexual scenarios are 18 or older. Read my “refz” tag. Preston is 18 in her junior year, the only reason this doesn’t take place when she’s 19 and a senior is because in the greater universe of my fics it wouldn’t make any sense. I care too much about the pissfic universe canon, soz about it. Contains female omorashi. Not your cup of pee? Don’t read!

Not My Fault

Teachers need to chill the fuck out. Listen, I get it that seniors are all little shits who just wanna get out of school already and I wouldn’t wanna deal with us either, but if you’re getting paid to do it there’s no need to be such a massive bitch all the time. Apparently it’s not their fault though. No, apparently it’s my fault. My fault that my idiot friend Josh dared me to chug four bottles of gatorade back to back without hurling. I mean, yeah I didn’t have to do it, but then I wouldn’t have gotten $20. Fine, I can see how that’s kinda my fault. But my third period teacher didn’t have to assign a test today and she didn’t have to make a rule saying that nobody was allowed to leave the room during it. And my fourth period teacher really didn’t have to have such a harsh tardy policy which forces me to sprint to her class everyday or risk detention. 

What I’m saying is, it’s really not my fault that I have to piss this badly right now.

I scribble down the homework assignments I probably won’t do in my planner I never used. The writing is more messy than usual, I have to go so bad my hands are shaking. I finish writing and slam the planner shut before trying to casually walk up to her desk.

“Ms. Perez? May I please use the restroom?” I ask in my nicest voice. 

“No, you’ve already used your bathroom pass for the semester, remember? September 2nd?” she asks.

It was December 14th, of course I don’t remember that. Oh wait.. That’s the day I ditched class in favor of Taco Bell. Fuck, I’ve screwed myself over. I’ve screwed myself over so bad. No way would I be able to last another hour and twenty minutes like this, I can literally feel my bladder pressing up against the waistband of my jeans and I’m already bouncing my legs and squirming in my seat like an idiot.

She shrugs me off and starts to lecture. And lecture. And lecture. She’s lecturing for years. Centuries. I know it’s history class and all, but does it really have to be taught in real time? The scenario is so cliche I’m shocked I haven’t been in it sooner. I have to pee fucking so bad, holy fuck. I jam my hands between my legs and cross them out of sheer desperation to not risk accidentally letting any out, it helps.  I feel a pencil tap my left shoulder. 

“What?” I irritatedly whisper at the tapper, my friend Andrew. 

“Does wittle Pweston have to go to the potty?” he chides. 

“ Leave me alone, dicksack.”

Fuck, if a dumbass like him noticed I’m definitely being too obvious about it. I’m conflicted, do I sacrifice my pride or my (relative) comfort? I slide my hand out from between my legs and hold my legs still. Nope, nope nope nope. It feels like I’m seconds away from pissing myself when I act natural. I check the time. How the hell do we still have an hour left?!

“Ms Perez?”, I beckon, “May I please use the restroom?” 

Some kids snicker, probably noticing that I’m drenched in sweat and trembling like a cold chihuahua.

“Is it an emergency?” she asks.

I swallow my pride for the sake of my pants. 

“Yes.” 

“You should’ve thought of that on September 2nd.” 

The class laughs again. It takes all of my strength not to lose my shit over that. That was over three months ago, how the fucking hell was I supposed to know that I would be on the verge of pissing myself in the middle of her class in a few months? And this bitch has the nerve to keep on lecturing. I have to piss too badly to pay attention, much less write notes. Andrew taps me again.

“What now? More words of wisdom?” 

“She usually gives in at this point. Guess she just hates you.” he shrugs.

“Andrew, if I piss myself I am placing 23% of the blame on you.”

His eyes widen.

“You have to go that bad, huh?” he chuckles as I rock back and forth in my seat with my hands still between my legs. 

I don’t see how he couldn’t have realized that yet. I feel tears prick into my eyes. I can’t tell if it’s because this hurts so much or if it’s because I can tell that I’m reaching the end of my rope at a quick and dreadful pace. Panicking is only making it worse. I need a plan. Fuck, fuck, fuck, I need a plan. Why can't I think of a plan? 

Then something horrifying happens. I leak. A ton. It surprises me so much that I whimper in surprise and take a sharp breath. A few kids turn their heads so I try my best to act natural to some extent. 

Once they lose interest I quickly inspect that crotch of my jeans. Fuck, it's noticeable. It's really noticeable, there’s a patch about the size of my palm and a couple drops of piss already on the desk chair. I start hardcore freaking out. I can't hold it much longer. Hell, I don't even know if this counts as “holding it”. The stain on my jeans is only gonna get bigger if I don't do anything about it. I shakily raise my hand for the second time in five minutes. 

“I said no, Preston.” she says, barely turning away from the board. 

I whimper again in frustration, more heads turn. Some kids whisper. Holy fuck, this is so embarrassing. I’m usually not so shy with this kind of stuff, but I literally know only one person in here and it’s fucking Andrew. If I was with my friends I could at least laugh it off.

“Miss, please.”, I beg, “I know you don't want me to miss anymore class, but I- I can't even focus right now!” I whine, my voice shaking. I'm willing to do just about anything to not piss myself right now. I can brush off any comments about this, but if I don’t make it I’m never gonna live it down. 

Ms. Perez slams the dry erase marker into the built in tray on the whiteboard and puts her hands on her hips. 

“Fine, but we're gonna use this as a learning opportunity. See, kids? This is why we don't skip class-”

Fuck fuck fuck! She's lecturing again. I leak once more, a small puddle starts to form on the chair. I panic and try to sit back further in it to try and cover it up. The feeling of wetness only causes another spurt to escape, somehow traveling up the seat of my jeans. I'm not gonna make it, there’s no way. This isn't happening. This can not fucking be happening. 

“Because leaving class at all detracts from your learning and then you use up passes that you're going to need later. And on that note, you really should be going before class.”

The leaks become longer and much more frequent. Even if she stops lecturing right this second everyone is gonna see that my jeans are soaked when I stand up and there’s no way I’m making it all the way to the bathroom, but if worst comes to worst at least I can hide somewhere and avoid making a scene over the inevitable. Another wave of desperation hits me and I can tell my time is running out fast. Hell, can I even move from this position? I slowly uncross my legs to test the waters. 

I let out a shaky gasp in surprise as the floodgates stop leaking and burst open entirely. My hand instinctively flies to my mouth as I freeze in shock and try really really hard not to make my heavy breathing obvious. Everybody in the room except for the teacher who's too wrapped up in her fucking lecturing can tell what's going on. A puddle forms on the desk chair and dribbles down to the scratchy classroom carpet. Loudly. To the point where I wonder how the hell she can't hear it. I cross my legs to try and quiet it in sheer mortification but now I can hear people whispering. This can't be happening, this can't be happening. 

“So you can't really come crawling back to me if you miss information, because you chose to leave class.”

There's no point in trying to hold back at this point, there's no going back or covering it up now. I put my head on my desk in defeat. Pissing after holding it for a long time is probably one of the greatest feelings in the world. Even if it is in your jeans during the middle of history class. Okay that was the grossest thing I've ever thought. Ignore that please. But I’m not wrong. But-

“So in short, be smart about your bathroom passes. Now hurry, Preston.” Ms. Perez nods. My face is burning with embarrassment as I nervously bite my tongue knowing I had no choice but to fess up before someone did it before me. 

“T-Too late.” I stutter through the tears pricking in my eyes. I feel like I'm gonna pass out. My face is so hot with embarrassment it feels on fire. 

Her face goes pale, almost sickly so. She stands still, unsure of what to say. All eyes are either on me or her.  I slowly stand up, covering my ass with my backpack and my crotch with my spiral which was nowhere near the right size for the task at hand. 

“So, uh, I’m gonna go now.” I blush, regretting my choice of words but leaving before any obvious jokes can be made. 

And I don't come back. I embarrassedly stormed outside the school, rummaging for my car keys and pressing the car unlock button for way longer than necessary before practically diving into the driver's seat. I start the car and let my head rest against the steering wheel as it turns on, still in park. I glance down at my jeans and can’t help but to find a little humor in it. If people give me shit for it there’s nothing I can do. This so obviously is not my fault.

[megamanxfanfics]

The Hiatus

I’ve been dreading the idea of writing this, but the fact that I am at all means that I’m coming out of my funk and am looking onward towards moving ahead, and hopefully forward, once again with this project in the future.  I’m afraid I’ve got a lot of explaining to do.  Wouldn’t you know it?  Life got in the way again.

It seems that every new Writing Season, something always happens to me to shift things around and make it near-impossible towards writing Mega Man X.  I’ve been mulling over how to talk about all of this without getting too personal on an MMX blog.  But the fact is that what happened to me is very personal.  And very complicated.  So I’m gonna just go for it, while keeping it in simplest terms.

I broke up with my girlfriend last month.  Which means I had to move out...

I can say that with dry eyes now, and without a heavy heart.  It was a smooth break.  Very mutual.  We both knew it needed to happen, because we weren’t happy at all. (Always doing our own thing, making separate plans... etc. etc. etc.)

But back to this.

I recall back in November I had posted a Writing Exercise - What X Remembers, in an attempt to kick-start my motivation for this project.  Needless to say, it didn’t work.  I can tell you right now that I wasn’t exactly busy.  I was burnt out.

Yes, I’ve been wanting and wanting to start this thing, but in the planning phases, I’ve also been afraid of it.  Because I don’t want to mess this up. Or it’s too confusing, or disjointed.  And I know how I get.  I harp and harp on things until it’s perfect, or feels good enough to present.  And... frankly, I was in a position where things were so bad at home, that I just wanted to spend time with her to keep everyone happy.

I would also take advantage of ‘Me-Time Monday’ as I used to call it when she’d be out doing her own thing.  Except my creative outlet for those days would be working on music, which is my first passion.  I’ve taken on a massive project of adding vocals to a lot of old music I had written, and even now I’m maybe half-way through that.  And there were definitely certain Mondays that I wasn’t even in the mood for music...  I certainly wasn’t in the mood for X.

I was depressed...  She was depressed...  But why?

Well... this blog, isn’t exactly about that.  But what I can tell you is that we were just going through this mundane routine every day.  Even our weekends became routine.  And neither of us were fun to be around any more.  Even upon realizing it and trying to do different things.  ‘Go out on a date, Dummy!’  That’s what I would tell myself.  But even nice events didn’t work.  She’d complain about being tired, or full or we wouldn’t talk at all.  That... was the extent of our interactions.  Outside of that, we’d just watch our shows, which would entertain us, and make us laugh.  We’d hold hands and stuff, sometimes.  But even then... it didn’t really feel romantic.  As one friend put it best, “It sounds like a friendship...”

And we both realized that last month.

So you could say that from November-February, I had slowly been working at getting my motivation toward this project back up.  Despite my daily toils, I was driven to bring myself to do the things that make me happy.  I had even reread most of the Writing Diaries, all the way up to Season V again, which took me down a nice bit of Nostalgia Road.  Reading about the Process of this Project is just as fun as reading the actual episodes for me.  It’s the Journey, not the Destination, after all.

But like I said, then February happened and we just imploded.  Everything immediately broke down.  My living space, my comfort zone.. where I was going to be!!  I didn’t know what to do.

In week 1 I took out the time to hang out with all of my closest friends.  I told everyone who needed to know first.

In week 2, I started seriously looking for places.  And that was equally exciting as it was exhausting.  However, I did find one thing that wouldn’t be ready for the next 2 months!  And that also freaked me out.  Now I had a pseudo-time table on my hands, but it was a little too long.

In week 3, I cracked.  We absolutely got into a fight in our shared space.  Things were so smooth as friends and roommates.  We had still shared our King Size Bed, and kept it completely civil, since nothing romantic was happening in the bedroom anyway...  But, at some point, some Social Media Drama occurred and I actually started acting like an Ex.  It was becoming very clear to me that living together any longer was going to destroy my Mental Health.  So I made the choice to get out of there, sooner than anticipated.  That Friday, I put a bag together and stayed at my parent’s house.

The original plan was to ride this out as long as possible and move into the 2nd Bedroom while I start to leisurely pack, as I keep looking for places.  But instead, all this drama accelerated my schedule and forced me out of that house.  That weekend, I came back to grab the rest of my clothes and relocate my TV back to my Parent’s house... Which takes me to week 4.  

In week 4, I focused on helping my brother with an After-school play.  I changed my work hours for him and everything, but on top of that, I had an unexpected interview which could’ve changed everything!!!  You see, I’ve been looking for better jobs at the same time as looking for new places.  And that’s what made this so stressful.  That’s even partially what caused all this drama, because one night I tried complaining about it to her, and she didn’t really seem to care much.  We were acting like exes to each other, and I really couldn’t handle it.  So once we got into a fight, that was the wake up call.  We’re not together anymore.  We can’t do this any more! Literally.  It was time to get out of there and move on.   Well, the job interview wasn’t in the cards... but it’s for the best, because it would’ve made this new place that I’ve been hoping for, not make sense any more.   That weekend, I got together all of my books/movies/games/comics, electronics, pictures, etc. etc. while she had put together boxes of the kitchenware I get to take.  By Sunday Night, basically all of my stuff was out of there. I couldn’t believe it.  It was very therapeutic and bittersweet.

This takes us to Week 5 - last week.  The commotion has slowed down to an abrupt halt.  I’ve been very tired.  Technically I have all the time in the world for MMX now, but I’m just not there yet.  And I probably won’t be for another month.  And I say that now, because I’m literally in between places.  All of my stuff is in boxes at my Parent’s house, but this other place that I saw is in the process of coming through.  Their time table accelerated a little bit.  I got news yesterday that the place has been painted, and that new carpets will be installed on 3/23.  As I am basically move-in ready, but also really want this to be the place, I worked with my new Landlord and asked him if I can start to leave boxes this weekend.

And that’s what I did today.  Today I left the first installation of boxes into that house’s basement.  It will be the new location I call my home, and the best part about it is that it’s only 5 minutes from Work.  That’s HUGE.  [But that too is temporary, as I still need a better job.]. One day at a time though, right?

This is primarily the reason why I’m writing today.  I feel that the brunt of this Transition Period has reached it’s Apex, and from here, it’s gonna be pretty smooth sailing into the next place, as I become acquainted with my New Normal of 2020.

I’m also writing, because admittedly, I have been thinking about MMX6 again, and rather than catch up with the rest of the diaries, I just read the last one.  Where I actually regressed into plot points again and still couldn’t answer certain questions, like what those stupid teleport portals are.  I mean, how much of an explanation do I really need?  It’s Mega Science!

I’ll be honest.  I could start tomorrow, and I’d probably feel pretty good about it, until I hit my first slump.  Which will most likely be the Central Museum stage.  And then I won’t want to do anything.

No, my heart’s just not in it yet.  I don’t want to start MMX6 on my laptop.  I want to be fully set up and Comfortable in my New Place when I start Season VI properly.  The silver lining is that I have all the time in the world for this and my music, now.  And I’ll have to feel out that situation too, because I desperately want to do both.  And that’s part of the conflict too.  Both projects literally interfere with each other, because I only have enough time and energy for one or the other on any given night.

Keep in mind, once I have my own place, everything’s on me.  That’s cooking, dishes, laundry and of course self-care, right?  So that involves the necessary shower, and of course entertaining yourself.  And that means yes, actually pulling myself away from my hobbies that I tend to wrap myself in so much.

I’m not blaming this project for losing my girl, or my music.  Hell, I’m not even blaming myself.  We just weren’t a good fit for each other, but we sure tried to be.  For 5 Years!  There was a lot of good in those 5 years too.  But she changed a lot.  Me too.  But her, more...  In a less fun way.  Very easy for me to say, of course.

These things happen.  People change.  And we truly made the healthiest choice to end it when we did.  It was really just a logical conversation about what isn’t working, and both of us literally agreeing that this doesn’t make sense any more.  My friend last night put it best.  “I think your relationship just ran its course.  You both saw it through to a complete end, and it was really good that you chose to end it when you did, because neither of you were happy any more...”

And there it is.  I suppose I’m ending this on that note.  One day I’ll be ready for MMX6 again.  But today is not that day.  And instead, I’ll be playing the MMZ/ZX Legacy Collection in the meantime.  =P.   And no.  Don’t get any ideas.  I have NO intention of writing an MMZ Anime.

[gg-astrology]

hiii gg! (i still don't know ur name 😔) what's the difference between sidereal and tropical? im a libra rising 6° sidereal and scorpio rising 1° in tropical.

Hey there (tis Nita but gg is fine too!! skdnfj) 💕💕💕 I’ve been saving this ask for a while and I finally have time to talk about it now!! 💕💕💕💕

[Side-real v Tropical ?? Whats that and What do?? ]

🚫long post 🚫

This is really really stripped down and basic but lemme jus explain a really quick zip up of some stuff

I’m going to skim over alot of details, and by no means am I an expert on this. So please read with your discretion

 I’m jus gonna give you a real quick run down of the basics oki 💕 

Hmm how to do this.. ok so let’s start for beginner beginner and go forward ok?

Beginners, hello! 💕 Today we’re gonna talk about 2 sets of zodiac (same signs just… how should we categorize/where does the start actually start) – that you might or might not know about yet! 💕

When I say ‘sets of zodiac’— today we’re going to consider the 12 signs. Just the 12 signs. And where it starts. Simple yes?

Questions we might be asking today: how do we have 12 signs?? (and consequently: Is there more?) and also ‘what do you consider to be the ‘real’ zodiac?’ 

For most people who started learning western/modern astrology, you’ll probably start off with using the Tropical system– which is the default nowadays and what astro sites usually use! 

Let’s learn a little about the Tropical system then?? What about it?? What it do?? 

Tropical Astrology

Tropical Astrology is probably the one most beginners tend to start out using, most people don’t realize maybe because it’s automated on most astro sites and generators nowadays. But there is an option where you can ‘check’ what kind of Zodiac set you’re using:

Like here, you can see on the left it says ‘zodiac’ and it’s usually set at ‘tropical’. 

In our really long history of astrology through the eras, we’ve transformed and evolve, shift and made things as we’ve come along. It’s still happening today too, but Tropical zodiac we align our Aries (the start of the Tropical zodiac) to when Spring begins (transform/shifts and ‘begins’ or carries through into spring from Pisces -> Aries).

We might’ve heard how cardinal signs are the ‘start’ of each astronomical seasons (Aries- Spring, Capricorn- Winter, Cancer - Summer, Libra- Fall) carrying the solstice and equinox of each one. The year (12 months) can be split into 3 months, 3 months of which we’re supposed to be in ‘each season’💕

Thus the 12 signs are also split into 3 modes, with the elements of each sign falling onto different modes as each other. Creating a certain hierarchy and dynamic, falling into place. The ‘start’, the ‘fixed’ and the ‘end/transformation’ (self, social, transcendent) of each reaction/behaviour in our signs. 

(Taurus/Leo/Aquarius/Scorpio are smack dab in the middle of their ‘season’ before they shift/transform into the mutable signs, that adapts and changes.. getting ready for the new season again) 

With the tropical, because Aries is always aligned with the Spring Equinox whenever the Spring Equinox is-- that’s when Aries is supposed to start. It changes, so it’s nice to consider how the person who considers themselves a ‘sun cusps’ of something can figure out which sign they’re were born in according to their specific year (y know, not really a fixed date since we got Aquarius early this year as well) 

And ok, that’s fair and good. But what about the stars? And this is where the mayham begins.

The Mayham

The thing about it is, the idea that the first degree of Aries also coincides with the beginning of spring can be like, yeah ok that’s good and true bc it’s seasonal and not ecliptical (aka like, we don’t have to consider the foot of Orpheus being in the way of our ecliptic plane and thus complications over that. But also i’d like to remind us that astrology wise: tropical or side-real are both equally relevant and important and shouldn’t be dismissed) 

We can feel the affect of how that might not always be the case though (ugh climate change and global warming but that’s human factor and I’m picking fights with the wrong thing here). 

Climate wise, some sides are having longer winter, longer summers than what was preceded 1000 years ago. Astronomical season vs Meteorological seasons. So should we go with season?? or Stars?? What is the truth?

(also for those of you who are curious about meteorological seasons, it’s like how the start of the season should be at the first day of the month. So the start of spring is essentially March 1st… running to May 31st. Clean, easy, cut and set.) 

Who even came up with the idea of 0/1st degree of Aries = Spring? It’s mr. Claudius Ptolemy (1 BCE). Our favourite Greek astronomer who saw that Aries Vernal Equinox coincide with the Spring back then. 

What we didn’t know however, is that back then the side-real and tropical coincides together. The earth ‘wobbles’ a little through the century (although Mr Ptolemy did apparently know that— but the 21st century will have to deal with it and figure out what we wanna use now, instead of him sdkfjn) 

The ‘start’ of Aries shifts. Not coinciding with the ecliptic. At first it was aligned, so no problemo. But after people started dying and years have passed (centuries) we start to notice that  the ‘start’ of the Tropical zodiac is now 25 degrees later than the Side-real zodiac (what the sky says/what the season says)

(So to answer your question: if you look at your side-real you’ll probably find that you might’ve moved back one sign. In all aspect, so with a Tropical Scorpio ASC you’re now a Side-real Libra ASC) 

The degrees gets added a little more bc of the wobble (or ‘precession of equinox’)… so let’s say its 25 degrees now… 1 (or 1.4) degree is added every 72 years or so (the ‘precession/wobble’) until it becomes 26 degrees different later (and so on) 

Equinox?? Tf??

For those who wanna know what that feels like… The Spring Equinox is essentially– for those who lives around the tropics, This is the time we all begin to suffer from heat (which will get worse and maybe we’ll be lucky for chances of rain). And for those who are upper/lower begins to have better weather. Congrats. 

The wobble that the Earth goes through (I think it’s called the ‘Axial Precession’ and ‘precession of equinox’) causes deviation in our we measure the ecliptic. Instead of looking at the ‘declination’ of the Sun in accordance to Earth (our earthling ego is so big) we now base it around the Sun’s ‘ecliptic/celestrial longitude’ instead.

(— also on that topic you can also check ‘Chandler’s Wobble’ as well!)  

The ‘precession’ gets longer, to skip the details and not confuse you, let’s just say because the Earth wobbles – our Tropical system and Side-real system starts to differ.

How? Why? What is a side-real?? We defined tropical as the 1st degree of Aries coinciding with the start of Spring. So what is side-real?

Side-real

Is a little more based on Constellation Zodiac. Think of us learning how to read constellations. Basically, our ancestors have noticed that our Earth, the Sun, Moon and 5 other planets are moving through the sky with a very specific routes in their travels. 

The observable stars and planets that we see scattered across our night skies makes up the visible ‘constellations’. The ones that coincides with the planets– the ones that the planet moves through, are the ones that we ‘count’. Whilst the ones that are just visible/there– are the ones that we don’t.

So technically, imagine if you were looking up at the sky. And you can see Mars travelling into this bish of a star again. You go ‘oh its Taurus season, it’s happening again ugh’. That’s what it’s like to live with fixed stars skjnksn

That’s a little off, but to help you out a little the path that these stars/planets travels to (the specific path) is called the ecliptic. It’s like how our sun has an ecliptic and sees the paths in which these constellation/stars move above in our sky. A little trippy, kinda weird. But also really really cool huh (think of the gif above of things just rotating along it’s axis and spinning, a little trippy huh)?

The side-real zodiac is based more on the constellations, these sets of ‘fixed stars’ that travels through our ecliptic and what we can see/observed. Because it’s not based on the equinox– the seasons, our environment and how it affects us as humans– the side-real is often regarded as the more ‘astronomical’ or the two.

Around the 5BCE (i think) the Mesopotamia starts to create a ‘standardized’ zodiac for side-real (or jus the zodiac since the hellanistic era is when things really starts to boom up and shift around) — technically some stars are smaller than others. But they decided that they’re gonna give each stars equal segments and make them look like they’re the symbolic representation of the heavens instead (poetic and also really cool, y know like why everything looks like a circle on the chart anyways– also the start of decans, which is really neat too!)  

So let’s… regroup a little.. That was a lot. Let’s give you a little tl;dr summary to work with:

Side-real zodiac would mean Aries ‘starts’ (1st degree of Aries) 25 days before the Equinox (currently)

Tropical isn’t based on the constellations/fixed stars (like side-real) but rather the Equinox and Solstice themselves (Aries ‘starts’ on the Spring Equinox)

Side-real is based on the constellations, and the celestial ecliptic. Whilst Tropical is based on the seasons, how it influences us.

You remember how I mentioned Tropical dates for the Sun sign? How Aries is March 21st - April 20th? With Side-real, it’s completely normal to have a different Sun sign Zodiac. So don’t freak out 💕

Right, that was a lot… so essentially what we’re dealing with here is two sets of zodiac. One that’s based on Season and one that’s based on Constellation/Fixed-stars. 

Which one do you choose?

Well… for me, personally, I just go with both? Learning both can be helpful. Plus there’s so much history behind both of them that it’s really good to balance and use both in my studies.

You might’ve heard of the debate with the star Orpheus that popped up. It’s more of an argument with the side-real part, where people say ‘hey if we’re going by the ecliptic then shouldn’t Orpheus that is between Scorpio and Sagittarius be counted? As the 13th sign in the zodiac?’ 

That’s another topic all together. But anyways. Which one is more accurate which one is wrong– well neither? Just because they’re different instruments, doesn’t mean they won’t end up reaching similar conclusions. It’s just a matter of what you’re using them for, or how you’re utilizing them.

(Also im skimming a lot of the details and debate on stuff, a lot of the argument might center around y know— basing it on stars instead of season. But also what do when feets of stars dangle within our ecliptic. Lotsa argument, debate and stuff on how the earth works in relation to our gravity, space, the Moon as well. Tropical vs Side-real. But y know. Both systems are good and valid it’s the more technical stuff that differs.) 

Tropical and Side-real??

Some people feel more at ease and comfortable with side-real, and that’s cool. Some people prefers tropical, and that’s cool too. None of these sets of instruments are ‘wrong’ because the dance of the seasons that Tropical brings and the constellation star-path that Side-real brings are both valuable and of importance???

One thing to remember for those is that Vedic astrology might not always be the same as side-real. Whilst Vedic astrologers may use side-real zodiac, the set of instrument themselves depends from people to people (vice versa with Western astrology with Tropical, you can use side-real. But it’s not Vedic astrology. Does that make sense?)

These zodiac sets are tools, zodiac instruments. How you play them differ from people to people (Vedic astrologers and Western astrologers) whether you’re a traditional astrologer, or a modern one. Whether you’re a Brazilian Vedic astrologer, or an Indian Vedic astrologer. How you play these instruments differ. So that’s a little something on… that.

Ayanamshas

One last thing about side-real astrology I think…. is that the ‘start’ of something in the Ayanamshas.

When you clicky the ‘side-real’ zodiac option it shows you a drop down list of ayanamshas to choose from (astro.com) The most popular one is ‘Fagen/Bradley’ and ‘Hindu/Lahiri’ – doing a lil bit more research on this might be good for you, since y know. People disagree on a lot of things 

(also you can use whole signs for this, since y know. it makes your life a little easier.)

I think that’s?? All I have to say for now?? For further research y know the Thema Mundi and learning about the Dendara, History of Astrology in general might be nice to get to know too. I’ll link my sources now:

Ayanamshas - Astro.com

Side-real and Tropical: What is Real?  - Real Astrology

Tropical, Side-real and Tropical Zodiac - Horoscopic Astrology Blog

The Thema Mundi - Horoscopic Astrology Blog 

The Western Tropical, Vedic Sidereal or Nakshatras? - Star Wheel Astrology

The Different Zodiacs used in Astrology - Star Wheel Astrology

Western Side-real Astrology - This ones more Fagan/Bradley based. 

Podcast: Tropical vs Sidereal | Kenneth Browner | Vic DiCara Dendera (YT video) 

Babylonian Star Lore - Gaven White (*change the end of the url link to the different signs) 

Wikis: Chandler Wobble | Axial Precession | Equinox | Declination of the Sun | Axial Tilt | Ecliptic Co-ordinate System | 

Astronomical Season and Meteorological Seasons 

Oh right I forgot to actually answer!! Aaaaahmmm if you count back 25 degrees currently from your Tropical placements, you’ll get your Side-real placements. So to answer why your Scorpio shifted to Libra, it’s like that bc it’s currently 25 degrees apart right now. 💕 But yeah again, the technicalities of it depends on what ayanamshas you use! 💕

[jq37]

oh my GOD the new ep!!!! like!!!!!!!!! SO MUCH happened but then also the preview for the next ep looks SO GOOD

**spoilers for first kisses and last words**

Hoo boy this was, as I predicted, a BIG one. Not that I needed to be an oracle to figure that out since there’s only a few eps left but man did it deliver.

I still think that Cool Kids, Cold Case had the most off the wall nonsense happening in the shortest period of time but this ep I think was overall the most consistently wild ep.

So let’s take it from the top.

I think I forgot to mention it before but Adaine’s, “I go into a rage,” hardcore cracked me up.

“I have hold person.”/”I stuff a sock in her mouth.” Insult to injury Adaine. 

The entire group dunking on Aelwen, forgetting that Riz is literally bleeding out, half dead.

“sausage festival” 

Adaine really was dead serious about her snitching threat huh?

Ally miming a boom mic.

I love how everyone including Siobhan mess up Aelwen’s name or mix it up with Adaine’s half the time.

And speaking of, wow. What a rise and fall for her in 3 eps (and about an hour in game time). She’s queen of the nerds. She’s not even cool at her own school. And terrified of whoever she made whatever shady deal with. I know she literally tried to kill the whole party last ep and that she’s the worst but I almost feel for her.

Almost.

“This is not on you. This is on the world within which you inhabit.”

I love Adaine’s semi-indigent, “We’re not going to kill you,” because Alwen was 100% ready to murder them which, side note, imagine how much on an international incident that would have been.

Lol at the group tag team bullying Aelwen about going to Mumple and Adaine using her magic jacket for super petty BS.

“Hey mom!”/”GodDAMMIT honey.”

The parent/kid relationships are so good in this show.

Everyone but Kristen parkouring off the roof when Sklonda specifically set up a ladder. 

“The put a girl in a palimpsest,” followed immediately by, “She went to a party,” as if those are on the same level.

Sklonda Gukgak DUNKING Aelwen into the squad car with a technical assist from Adaine. I knew she was gonna be my fave parent from her intro scene and I love her even more than I thought.

“With all due respect, (A/N: Which is none), suck my dick, fuck you.”

“She tried to murder me.”/”BE THAT AS IT IS.”

“Eh, you carry a gun.”

“No one who’s detecting maidens is a maiden.”

I feel like I’m quoting a lot today but there were so many money lines this episode. 

Everyone always loses it when Brennan starts doing the Identify spell voice and I love it. 

Adaine’s dad is T R A S H

Adaine’s mom on the other hand…I’ve been wondering about her for a little while because usually the outright emotional abuse has been from her dad while her mom is either not there or not saying anything. So I’ve been wondering was her deal is and we finally got the start of an answer. I know we only have a few eps left but I hope we go a little deeper into what exactly is going on there. It seems like Adaine’s parents are gonna be a big factor in whatever endgame is planned so fingers crossed,

Everyone cracking up as Emily backs Fig into a corner talking to Penelope. 

I love Gorgug so freaking much. Just his good natured, lumbering self. EVery time Zac opens his mouth gold falls out. 

Emily MAXED out her deception huh?

I think Siobhan must have forgotten that she took the crystal with Ostentasia away from Aelwen at the end of last ep. Either that or they willingly gave it to the cops and I forgot (but I think it’s the former because she said in this ep that it was in Aelwen’s pocket when at the end of the last ep she def took it).

My autocorrect keeps wanting me to type Ellen for Aelwen. I WISH.

I knew it! He’s a PIRATE. Suck it Fabian. (lol at Adaine stirring the pot. That was like Adaine being sincerely polite and Siobhan trying to cause problems and I love mixed motive player/character decisions). 

I wonder if the banker is named after John Hughes. 

I can’t believe the dumb bank is actually a huge plot point.

Yikes, re: Bill and Fabian. That got tense. Though I’ve kinda been waiting for some kind of blowout for a while. His dad runs very hot and cold and I figured it would only be a matter of time before we saw some of the cold.

Also, Lou breaking character in the middle of that very intense moment to clarify a plot point. 

Sidenote: For a hot sec after reading the title of the ep and remembering how Sklonda is competent to the point of (probably) breaking the original plot, I was so concerned she was gonna eat it this ep. So glad she didn’t.

Anyway, the idea of swinging sadly on a rope is so freaking funny.

Fig: Can I offer you a sad song in this trying time?

Huge portrait of Bill Seacaster in Fabian’s room. 

Adaine is gonna bring up him kissing her sister very time she needs to get out of something w/ Fabian for the rest of her immortal life. 

Another sidenote: This is a little thing but I always think it’s interesting when fantasy worlds have the same months and days as us when they’re named after like Norse Gods and Roman statesmen that wouldn’t exist in their world. Same with Roman numerals and Irish coffee. 

“Am I allowed to smoke in here?”/”Of course.”

I really like the character detail that Adaine is always really polite to everyone, including/especially people like Fabian’s maid and Basrar. People that she wouldn’t necessarily “have to” be polite to, you know? It’s like she’s trying to make up for the fact that her family is a bag of dicks. 

“Fantasy Google”

The whole bit with Fabian’s porn stash was so good. This group is so good w/ yes-adning each other.

“Privateer me a new one.” Emily is so good.

“Special investment” Suspicious  

I was thinking “I can’t believe looking at a bank’s FAQs is part of this game,” right as Brennan said it.

So I went back and watched Siobhan’s face from when Emily first mentioned Kal Vaxis to when she got the connection to KVX and it took her 22 seconds. I also missed the quick cut to Brennan when Gorgug asks, “What is Kal Vaxis,” and you can tell he knows they’re so close to breaking it with the little grin on his face. I wish we had gotten a reaction shot right after she got it. Anyway, great team solve w/ the MVP trophy to Siobhan/Adaine. 

I loved when Zac, Emily, and Siobhan all whipped out their laminated maps in tandem to figure out what was happening. 

The hard mood change from Adaine dropping the bomb about Riz’s dad and to forming a committee to help Gorgug flirt with Zelda was wild.

Kristen telling anyone to be suave is hysterical. 

What a DISASTER of a committee Gorgug’s friends are. Well meaning but so trash

Fig: Tell her you got a SICK tattoo

Adaine: Bring her to see art in the middle of the night

Fabian: You cannot date this person (Kristen: You absolutely have to)

Kristen: Actually not garbage advice but she is in no position to be giving dating advice to anyone 

Riz: Having a literal existential crisis 

“Who else is he gonna date?” WOW, savage Adaine.

I meant to say this before but I love how Adaine’s go-to is immediately ice cream and she’s always on board to go to Basrar’s. Like how when she texted everyone 2 eps ago she was like, “Let’s get ice cream now.”

Mmm, don’t love that Gorthalax isn’t answering his phone. I have been waiting for a significant adult to die for a while now.

OK, look, the whole thing about Penelope and Dayne being eternal prom king/queen. Is it wild? Yes. Is it implausible? No. No it’s not. Even Murph, most veteran player, was kind of like, “Wait, does that make sense?” Because, in this setting, it kind of would? I’m not sure it fits within the story so far and I’d have to go back and listen to the more lore-y stuff again but the conceit itself is like the exact right amount of crazy to fit in this setting? And they never cut to Brennan like I wanted so I could judge his face for any kind of tell. But anyway, you guys know I’ve been predicting a prom finale and this would fit right into a prom finale. 

The girls giving Gorgug a pep talk before his date was ADORABLE. 

Gorgug having to check his phone to remember three words, “You look nice.”

“Your friends are popular and loud” True

Zelda’s a BARBARIAN! She’s a MEGA BARBARIAN! 

I know they mean ecstasy like intense emotion but I kept thinking, like, molly.

Hmm, so Penelope wanted to know if Zelda had hooked up w/ Gorgug, ie: if she was a maiden. Can they only palimpsest maidens? Or (as we will get to later) does nice guy Biz only want virginal maidens for his creepy reverse Weird Science arcade setup?

Zelda listing off every type of metal and then Gorgug’s, “Same stuff,” was perfect comic timing on Zac’s part.

Imagine the Hangman screaming down the road on fire, Zelda completely terrified. 

I love the Hangman so freaking much.

“DO NOT GIVE TREATS TO MY MOTORCYCLE.”

I can’t believe everyone is living at the freaking crappy apartments. I knew they were all gonna end up hanging at one persons’ house but I kinda figured it would be Fabian’s house or Gorgug’s house. 

I”m also concerned about Bill. I feel like we keep getting reminded that he’s mortal a LOT.

Did Gorgug’s parents have indoor fireworks on tap for Gorgug’s first date?

Oh my God the whole docking conversation. Never play chicken with Brennan because the dude will not blink.

“We didn’t do that.” That’s his other best comic timing moment of the ep.

“Polishing my axe”

Kristen this episode 

I really wish they’d made the roll to find Ragh later in the ep. Fig is so ride or die for Gilear now and I love it.

“I fall asleep.”

Adaine almost making her parents dunk on Gilear but then pulling back.

But also, Adaine and Gilear going off the the oracle together.

“Fig pack it in.”

Affirmations with Fig and Gilear.

Fig, do you really think platonically cuddling with Kristen is the move?

Riz setting himself up for a dramatic entrance is so fantastic.

Hmm, so Biz and Zayne were attacked at the same time. That’s why that cold pill detail was in there way back. I’ve been trying to figure out what was always planned and what was quick re-working but Brennan is so good I can never really tell.

Are multiple unrelated groups just getting into palimpsests at the same time? Or mostly unrelated groups tied to one person?

“We are not gonna get our security deposit back.”

RIZ’S DAD IS JAMES BOND! YES! I didn’t know I wanted that to be the case until it happened and now that’s the only acceptable option. 

Riz didn’t get the 20′s he needed when fighting Aelwen but man he got it at the best story moment this week.

Oh man that home movie

The pearl is grey. Interesting. 

“Mom our family is so awesome Mom we’re all so badass, I thought it was just us but Dad is awesome too, why didn’t you tell me Mom?”

Sklonda: Internally screaming. 

Man he went full Inigo Montoya.

“I’ve got nimble escape so…”

“I guess we have a two bedroom,” I think was a really underrated funny line.

Did Riz ever tell his mom about the time of death thing.

Everyone inundating Gilear with overlapping chatter.

lol the Hangman likes Zelda’s family

Ally’s panicked, “FUCK” is always hilarious. 

Why are all the adults in Gorgug’s life trying to get him laid?

OK so the elementals were conjured by Aelwn’s magic Brennan said. He said by Aelwen’s magic, not by Aelwen. I wonder if that turn of phrase was specific or arbitrary. Like, we were told where Aelwen is but we don’t know. Was she forced to do it (either by threat or by magic)? Clearly someone (Biz?) is pulling her strings to at least some degree. 

“It’s probably about marriage.” “WAR HAS BEEN DECLARED.”

That happened fast

Fun fact from my International Law class: When a government kidnaps someone, it’s called rendition. 

“There’s a war, fuck school.”

Yeah it is wild that Adaine’s parents didn’t call her.

OK so did the Elves get Aelwen back but also go, “But you still need to go to jail.” Because they cut Brennan off before the end of that sentence which might have had more clues in it.

“I text my mom k”

I also wanna know who gave Kristen a slushy marg (It’s war times. I bet things are looser now)

Murph’s face when Brennan said, “Lucky Stones” was so good. That was so Riz.

S/O to Ally for pre-casting Guardian of Faith. Good instinct. 

AHHHHHH BIZ

As I said in an earlier conversation s/o to Adaine for DUNKING on him at every opportunity because he DESERVED IT. Also, her instincts for who sucks in this game have been spot on.

Another s/o to Riz for having the presence of mind to not pull a Star Lord and to pretend to be on the bad dude’s side for long enough to gain some kind of upper hand.

OK, wow was not expecting that twist. I feel like I need to go back and rewatch some stuff to get a better handle of the timeline and stuff. Like, when exactly did the girls start going missing again? And what year is Biz? Has he been masterminding this whole thing? I feel like no but I feel like he’s masterminding his own thing which happens to a puzzle piece in something bigger? BUT IT’S A PRETTY DAMN BIG PIECE. Who opened the new arcade? Is it connected to the bank?  How did Biz get involved? Who’s his supplier? Did someone hook up Biz, Daybreak, Penelope, and Aelwen with Palimpsests to do their own separate things, hoping that at least one of them would succeed which would somehow be good for the mystery person? I am so excited to find out and I really hope Brennan and the cast do a Q+A sesh after S1 is over to hash some stuff out.

Siobhan’s face when Biz said he was going after Adaine.

ALSO, you’re just gonna TELL RIZ and you wanna PUT ONE OF HIS BEST FRIENDS into a MAGIC CRYSTAL???? AND YOU THOUGHT HE’D BE ON BOARD? Like, even if he was, what about the 4 other people who are there?????

(sidenote, wild Gorgug’s parents just left them alone, no questions asked)

Theme-wise, this is the fight ep I’m most excited for. It seems rad as hell.

All that yelling in the promo for next week. Either the raddest thing possible happened or there was a TPK. There is no other option.

Wow, that was a stellar ep and this is a really long post. I really can’t wait for next week’s!

Edit: I meant to say before, is Penelope’s FB album like…a hit list? Like does whoever’s doing the actual dirty work (Biz? S/o else?) know that whoever she takes a picture with is who they should target?

[friendliest-place-on-earth]

Sprace Domestic Series (pt. 7)

(Part 1)

(Part 2)

(Part 3)

(Part 4)

(Part 5)

(Part 6)

(AO3)

Spot anxiously paced up and down in one of the small rooms of the building where he would soon be married. Jack, being his best man, sat in a chair near him and tried to calm him down.

“Spot, there ain’t nothin’ to be worrying about.” Jack said calmly, only to earn a glare from the nervous, now slightly pissed off, groom.

“You don’t know that! How can you tell me that everything is going to be okay because this is my wedding. How’d you survive yours, Jack?” Spot wrung his hands nervously, feeling the moisture on his palms then rubbing them on his black dress pants.

“Well I just remembered that the only reason everyone was there was so that I could marry the man I love. In all honesty I was where you were right now, only I was alone in the bathroom so no one had to watch, but as soon as I saw Davey from across the aisle I knew everything was gonna be okay.” Jack smiled.

“Geez, what a sap.” Spot muttered, slowing his footsteps.

“Yeah, says the guy who proposed to his boyfriend in the freaking snow and then watched Frozen in a blanket fort.” Jack scoffed.

“Ah lay off will ya? It’s my wedding day!” Spot rested a hand on his chest, feigning offense.

“Yeah okay. Seriously though, you’re gonna make it through this because this is gonna be something you’ll want to remember.” Spot pulled up a chair next to Jack and practically collapsed onto it.

“What if… what if Race decides he doesn’t wanna marry me anymore?” Spot tilted his head down, playing with his hands as a distraction.

“Oh trust me that kid’s got it bad.” Jack laughed, clapping his hand on his friend’s shoulder.

“I just hope you’re right…”

“You kiddin’ me? I’m always right!” Jack exclaimed, hitting his chest with his fist. Spot gave him a look with his eyebrows raised that said something along the lines of Really?

“Okay so I’m right most of the time.” Spot gave him the same look.

“Well some of the-” Spot raised his eyebrows even higher.

“Alright, so I’m wrong a lot but I do know a whole lot about love and you two are in it.”

“I know that it’s just, what if something goes wrong or-” Spot began his descent into the spiraling pit of worry.

“C’mon Spot, Davey planned this wedding. Do you think he’d ever let there be room for error?” Jack questioned.

“I guess not-”

“So, all you gotta do is wait for everyone to arrive and we can get this show on the road and you’re on your way to becoming Race’s husband.” Jack added emphasis on the last word, which made Spot’s heart flutter and his stomach flip. If he could get out of here as his husband, then it would all be worth it.

“I still can’t believe you got Katherine to officiate it…”

“Race, sit down would ya!” Crutchie groaned, pulling his friend onto the couch he was sitting on.

“Just lemme pace in peace, Crutch.” Race tried to stand up again, but he was again pushed into the cushions.

“I’m not just gonna sit here and watch you worry yourself sick! Now talk to me, what’s got you so worked up?” Race breathed a sigh of defeat and sagged into the back of the couch.

“I’m just so nervous. I want this to be amazing, Spot doesn’t have any family that would care enough to come and my goal is to make up for that.” he said quietly.

“First of all, you’re never gonna take their place, most likely because there never really was a place in his heart for them. Those are relationships you can never replace, but you have something better- a real partnership based on love and trust. Isn’t that why you’re here today?”

“You ever thought about taking up writing?” Race smiled crookedly at his friend.

“Well, I teach English class from 11-12 every single day.” he joked. Crutchie was a fifth grade teacher at the local elementary school, so he taught all subjects.

“I’m sure it’s a blast.”

“Hey Race, I want you to remember that Spot loves you, a lot. It’s really obvious, because when he looks at you, I see what everyone talks about and that’s something special. What I’m trying to say is, he loves you no matter what so you don’t gotta work extra hard to please him.”

“I know, I just can’t help feeling this way from time to time. Spot’s usually here but, I guess I can wait a little longer.” Race let a soft smile grow onto his face.

“I hope I can help you at least a little bit.” Crutchie returned the smile.

“Yeah of course kid.”

“We’re the same age!” he groaned, rolling his eyes. Race felt a laugh bubble up through his stomach and some of the nervousness went away. Maybe this will be okay, he thought.

“How much longer we got?” he hoped to get this started soon.

“I’d like to say about twenty more minutes, but I can go see for myself if you want?”

“If you would, that’d be great.” “No problem, I’ll be right back.” Crutchie quickly got up off the couch and walked out the door. He noticed someone else walking in the same hallway a few feet ahead, and soon recognized them.

“Hey, Jack!” he waved, moving faster to catch up.

“You out here to get everyone inside too?” he smiled.

“Well, technically I’m just supposed to see how long it’s gonna take for everyone to get inside, but yeah basically.” Crutchie laughed. They walked briskly down the hall and began guiding everyone inside. They were all shown their seats and it was time for the wedding to finally begin.

It had been decided that their wedding would be very traditional, (Race’s parents insisted and they were paying for the wedding so what could they have done?) and it turned out to be better than they could’ve imagined, thanks to Davey since he basically planned the whole thing all by himself. Race was going to be the one walking down the aisle, the only two reasons being that Spot proposed and Race actually had a parent to walk him down. As the wedding party took their places, there was a pause and the large double doors at the end of the room opened up to reveal Anthony holding onto his father’s arm. Sean almost burst into tears right then and there, but he managed to summon all his willpower and only let a few slip through. Everything was just so perfect, the first notes of the piano version of “This is Gospel” by Panic! At The Disco came on, and how good Anthony’s tux fit on him, it was everything they could’ve hoped for. The grooms immediately made eye contact, even as the blue eyed boy’s eyes welled up with tears which made them look like the ocean. It seemed like he couldn’t get to the end of the aisle fast enough, all they wanted to do was reach out and grab each other’s hands. Finally though, that moment did arrive and Anthony was met with Sean as he released his father’s arm.

“Friends and family.” Katherine’s voice rang out, silencing everyone.

“We’re all here today to witness Sean and Anthony join one another in marriage.” they had decided to put their legal names on their invitations, since that might make more sense years in the future.

“I have had the pleasure of knowing these two for quite some time, and I am honored that they have allowed me to officiate the ceremony.” she beamed as Spot raised an eyebrow.

“Okay so I asked if I could do it, but I am legally certified thanks to the internet. That said, being a good friend of these two men here, I have had the privilege of watching them fall in love. I would like to start this off by reminding you two and everyone else here of the newest journey you are about to take with one another. Marriage is something many people have fought long and hard to earn, which shows its importance to people. It adds a whole new meaning to your relationship, it’s a promise to love one another.” Anthony squeezed Sean’s softly.

“It’s a promise to be supportive, to love and accept all parts of your spouse. Getting married is one of the many ways to celebrate and showcase how much you love your significant other. Speaking of, I think it’s time to share the vows Anthony and Sean have prepared separately.” Katherine stepped back slightly and motioned for them to begin. They each took out a piece of paper with their vows on it, which was basically their insurance policy incase they got too flustered in the moment. It was Anthony’s turn to begin..

“S-sean, I love you more than I can say. I know how incredibly cheesy that sounds but considering we watch Disney movies pretty much all the time, I think it’ll pass.” Sean laughed quiet enough for only Anthony to hear, and he carried on.

“I know that I can be a lot to handle, I get too worked up sometimes or I can stress out if things aren’t how I want them to be, but I also know that you’ll be here despite that. I promise to tell you when I’m upset or stressed out, because I know you can make it better. You are my favorite person in the world, you’re my best friend and this is why I promise to always love you.” Anthony’s voice shook like mad as the world’s happiest tears fell in line down his cheeks.

“F-for my last promise, I promise to keep finding new movies for us to watch because as long as there’s new movies, there’s new ones to watch together.” Anthony’s vows were finished, and Sean pulled him into a tight hug while they both cried for a few moments.

“How am I supposed to follow that?” he asked, causing the entire audience to erupt in tearful giggles.

“Anthony, I can’t tell you what it means to be standing here, looking at you, in front of all these people. You have added so much color to my life, and that’s one of the many reasons that I love you. I’m mostly known as “that angry short guy” and while I fully admit that that’s true, you make me feel like I’m more than that. I grew up in an a place where I couldn’t even dream about being this happy, feeling like my heart is about to explode in the best possible way. I don’t feel so confused about what my future looks like ‘cause I can see it right here. I promise to spend the rest of my life making you feel as important and as whole as you’ve made me. I promise to always be there for you when you feel sad, because I know how hard it is to ask for help. Finally, I can promise you that I’ll make many more blanket forts that we can spend the night in, if only to remember the night I proposed. My love, you’ve done what I thought was impossible, you’ve managed to take a broken boy from Brooklyn and make him feel loved.” Sean took in the brief moment as he finished his vows and heard small sniffles ripple through the crowd. Anthony reached out again to pull him into a hug, crying even more this time.

“If we could get the rings…” Katherine motioned for Les, the ring bearer, to bring them forward.

“Thank you, Les.” she instructed the pair what to do next.

“With this ring, I thee wed.” Sean slid the ring onto Anthony’s ring finger, both of their hands shaking.

“With this ring, I thee wed.” Anthony’s turn to give Sean his ring. Sean’s heart was pounding in his ears and he heard something along the lines of “you may now kiss the groom” and before he knew it he was kissing Anthony, his husband.

Everything else paled in comparison after that kiss, talk about magical. Nonetheless, they all went to the reception a few minutes away, which was held in a hotel ballroom. They’d taken all their formal pictures beforehand, so now it was time to party and hope the photographer didn’t get any embarrassing candid photos. As everyone shuffled in and had a few cocktails, (well, those who could drink) it was time for the newlyweds to make their big entrance. The wedding party was introduced and soon Davey, who was in charge of the mic, announced the new couple.

“If everyone could please welcome, Mr. and Mr. Conlon-Higgins!” the ballroom erupted in cheers and applause as Spot and Race made their way onto the dancefloor. The room was soon silenced as they began their first dance to “So This Is Love” from Cinderella. Spot had his arms hooked around Race’s waist as they danced slowly to the music. Race was keenly aware that everyone was staring but according to his husband “they’re supposed to be staring”.

“It’s okay, don’t look at them, just look at me.” Spot whispered as he looked up into Race’s eyes.

“Using my own words against me?” he fake scoffed as Spot pressed a kiss to his forehead. They continued to dance to the music, drunk in the feeling of absolute love and happiness. Race his forehead on Spot’s as he softly sang one of the lines.

“So this is love.”

“Mhmhmm.” Spot hummed the next line, earning another tearful kiss from his Disney prince.

Here are I used in this fic and the links to the YouTube videos that inspired me to use them:

This is Gospel (Piano Version)

So This is Love [This one is a cover with Tessa Violet and Jon Mozart but I really liked it]

[canaryatlaw]

alright, so today was pretty good. I didn’t have any specific thing to get up for in the morning so I slept till like 1ish like I have been lately. After waking up I spent a while with my laptop in bed trying to figure out technical issues regarding converting the podcast recording file into an mp3 which was very easy for the main file, but the two minute one I had to record just with the plugs was being very difficult, so it required a Skype call and downloading some different software, and ultimately having me re-record it in a way that we could get it transferred to an mp3. The issue was the main file was recorded on the call recorder Skype software I have, but at the end my co-host’s wifi dropped out, ending the call and the recording, so I had to record the ending separately in a different program that was now being very difficult. so that took a while to figure out but ultimately we figured it out and the episode should be getting put out in the next few days, so that’s exciting. from there I moved to the couch and didn’t really feel like watching tv so I just listened to some podcasts I needed to get through so I don’t get too backed up while taking care of some stuff on my computer. Around 5 I got changed into actual clothes and got ready, then took the 5:30 bus down to the school Jess works at where i was meeting her when she got off at 6. that went smoothly, in the past the bus has been running late but it worked out pretty well this time. so I met up with her at her car and we sat for a few minutes because she had to make a phone call, then we headed out. The agenda was to drive up to the car dealership we had been at this weekend and got her car from to give them the second key for her old car that we didn’t have on us this weekend (because we weren’t planning on getting into a new car, so we weren’t prepared). So we made the drive up to where the dealership was (northern suburbs) and gave them the key, then from there we drove to the mall located nearby that we hit up on Saturday for their fancy movie theatre in order to hit up their cheesecake factory, since that’s one of our favorites and we didn’t get to go on Saturday. We got seated in a few minutes, ordered our usual pastas, then Jess fought anons for a while during which she read them out loud and I mostly laughed and made witty comments, so that was fun. We didn’t finish the pasta so we’d have some room for cheesecake, we both got about halfway through our cheesecake before taking the rest back with us (or I did at least, I think Jess just gave up) and from there headed home. When I got back to my apartment I just chilled on my computer in my room for a bit before getting in the shower and getting ready for bed, and now I am here. Plan for tomorrow is to go to the dentist because I haven’t been in like a year which is bad because like many other parts of my body, my teeth hate me and love to cause problems 🙄 so let’s hope everything goes smoothly there. Otherwise I’m gonna be packing for London (I’m still so freaked/amped that we’re going to London in 2 days!!!) and possibly doing a load of laundry, I need at least two pairs of like leggings or sweatpants without any metal in them for the plane ride there and back (because the airport scanning machines also hate me). So we’ll see how that goes, I have all my cosplay stuff laid out already so it shouldn’t be too difficult. And yeah, that’s it for now, it’s a bit past 1 am and I gotta get up at like 11 (not bad, I know, but still earlier than like 1 and we know how I like my sleep) so I should be getting to bed now. Goodnight dears. Sleep well.

[survivoremathia]

Ep. 6 - “I Had the Wig Snatched from On Top of me” - Duncan

ROB

Eddie did not fucking deserve that, fuck you Sam you piece of shit I've hated you for so long. The newbies can go to hell. Matt fucking Summers I am so glad Jenna Tibby beat you she is a much better person than you, and you don't even host. Bye. 

I'm pissed I wish it was me instead

http://survivoremathia.tumblr.com/post/158247853246/immunity-6-word-play

http://survivoremathia.tumblr.com/post/158291809426/immunity-results

RYAN B

I pretty much said nothing this round and did absolutely nothing for the challenge but #noshame cause I'm failing 5 classes so.....

ALI

AHHHHH. I JUST MADE A BIG MOVE! This was my first real tribal (the last one was just an inactive being voted out) and it featured IDOL PLAYS, A SPLIT VOTE and.... ME PLAYING AN ADVANTAGE. little old me!!!! Like I just am in shock. That tribal went amazingly. And I don't feel bad about potentially having betrayed Duncan, as he betrayed me too by lying to me! :) All is fair in love and war, but if they think they can fool little old me, they're mistaken. This sheep has claws :)

ROB

7F

fucking [6:56 PM] Trevor: 

<<< FranklyTrevor, Today 6:56 PM no swear words

fucking

JAY

I haven't done one in a bit I'm sorry!!! But I'm in a fantastic position on my tribe. Scott and Ryan are mostly inactive, so I shouldn't have to worry too much about the first two votes. Also I'm still very close to Owen and RTP. And with Owen comes Trevor, which is fantastic for me. I feel like I'm playing Robin's game from India. Getting close to the couple. But it works. And I'll be close with them while I'm on this tribe.

JD

That tribal was terrifying. I was so stressed... I thought that Logan had the same advantage as Ali did. I was holding my breath, waiting to see a 'and there's one final vote' which never happened. I was buzzing on that for like hours at work. But at yen same time, we might have out smarted them this time but why are still in our tribe. We have to get along and we have to win the next challenge.

I'm not going to lie though, the thought of throwing a challenge did cross my mind. Because me and Ali are in a good place here and if we win then that puts our alliance i. A tight spot and we don't know how they are making over there. We just have to do the challenge and hope that they've had time to make their connections like we did and see what happends.

On another side not, if Sam ever right my name down, I'm going to be a bit bitter, not for long because this is a game but i mean me and Ali saved him, his game was in our hands and we decided we needed him. So Sam, if you voted for me at any time... Give me a day lol

-

Omg i really want to work with Eddie. I really think we could have done really well together. And i feel bad about lying to him because he told me flat out he was voting Sam and he wasn't lying. But i mean shit happens and of we play together again i hope to work with him but i guess we might never see that 

I think this last vote out a target on me and Ali. I think we did a good job at downplaying how close we are but I think everyone is starting to see if. Hopefully not all of it, but they know we're working together... We'll see. 

-

I'm a little bitter that the hosts feel asleep during the endurance challenge. It's 4 am for them and I'm still up and they're​ hadent been a post for 2 hours not. My tribe could have really put themselves a head for when everyone else gets on but now we can't. People need sleep but i don't know, feels a little unfare that my tribe (not just me) sat up late to try and grab the extra points and now we'll be tired tomorrow and the others will get the bonus of sleep. Whatever, that's life. 

-

I can't wait to get back with Trevor and Lydia and see what they think about is being able to vote out Eddie :) thank you Trevor for giving us that little bit of advice baby

RYAN PALMER

Ok so tribe swap, epic. I ended up with most of my allies and this is going to be great. The Fam consisting of me Owen Trevor and Lydia seems like it going to be my strongest alliance rn. I obviously still have David who I want to work with, and Jay seems to think the 4 Othrys are gonna stick together. That leaves a pretty big group of intertwined people to work together and I dont have to expose myself. and as soon as we came over trevor immediately told me about how he wants ryan b out next. idk what happened but he does not like him. we are just gonna ignore scott and hope he just gets med evac'd. we won the music video challenge thanks to muah! jk lydia is the star of the video lmfao i love it. so then eddie leaves? nut. glad i dont have to deal with him in this game. their tribal seemed like a shit show and i want to know everything about it. so then we get this new challenge and trevor is like...oh we can lose its fine....and im like....uh no i dont lose on purpose....and he said not on purpose....but like hes not even trying for this challenge...i know hes trying to throw and i hate that. this is going to bite him in the ass later let me tell you!

DUNCAN

You know the saying "I had the rug swept from under me"? Well I had the wig snatched from Ontop of me

-

I fee like freaking Gina Marie after nick got evicted in bb15. Yesterday really sucked. Eddie is a dear friend and someone who I've been dying to play with for the longest time. I'm so pissed that they took him out. Like? The only reason I voted with those three is because eddie was a part of the three. I could of dealt with being lied to by the other side, by being in the minority, by losing an alliance member. I'm crushed by losing eddie. Now I look like a fucking idiot bc I followed my d*ck and not my head. Now I'm on bottom and I need to make sure I find footing in this fucking tribe to make sure that I'm not the next one to go if we go to tribal.

-

Oh! On top of that! I played my fucking idol and had to give it to someone. So who do I give it to?! It's a hard decision bc I don't trust anyone for shit on this tribe, and I'm probably the next to go, but I have to do something, I can't just roll over and die right? Sooo even though I just tried to help vote him out, I gave it to Samuel. Samuel has all the control over the newbies and is in the power position. I don't want to try and get anyone to flip to Logan rob and I because really? Like I've said, I was only in that alliance for eddie. I'm not going to stay on bottom for the other two. #sorrynotsorry I know I can work well with Samuel if he'll have me, so basically I have to spit shine his ass while trying to play it cool with the newbies. Matt summers? Can cheauxke? I told him I liked eddie and I think he was looking to weaken me if I flipped so that's why they went for him. Also you know what, I didn't feel bad about flipping when I casted my vote. Matt summers lied to me about being in an alliance on our old tribe and that's just frustrating. Then he messaged me back after I messaged him at Tribal like "looks like it's going to be hard for me to trust you now" and I'm like BITXH YOU ALL LIED TO ME ANTYWAYS! So I was on the outs anyways?.......I just feel kind of down. All these great people were cast and I knew it was going be a lot harder than the last two times. I'm still going for that crown, but it looks like the path is going to be paved with blood tears and the corpses of friends 

ROB

I know that now that we're not playing anymore, Eddie is going to stop talking to me again. Fuck Ali, should've just voted Sam and saved your double vote jackass.

ALI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMRRoCmK5eU

OWEN

SO! We lost immunity. I didn't try very hard. I don't think any of the people who actually try on this tribe DID do very well... Oops. We have dead weight in Scott and Ryan B so honestly... I wasn't that concerned. Part of me wants Jay to go because Duncan/Rob/Logan are probably a thing, and Jay would most likely join them. Plus Jay has WON before. But also, Jay does well in challenges and I'm technically working with him.

So my thought now is to go for Ryan B, and maybe Scott will just get expelled for literally not showing up lmao. I'm not really sure who Isaac is... But yikes.

I'm not playing a very good game I don't think, but it's because of the cast. Half of them I have strong relationships outside of the game and I can't really help that. The other half don't bother to show up or try. So there's nobody new for me to get to know. So! I'll lay low and wait for shit to hit the fan when all the people I know merge. I do feel like I have my hand in different baskets and we'll see what happens :~)

JD

So... I got a ring. I don't know own if i like not being able to help direct the vote. Not being able to have a say in what was happening. I might have to pass it off too maybe, I'm not sure. It's cool as hell, i love the idea but i don't know... Control issues maybe.

RYAN B

Welp. At this point it's gonna either be me or Scott. I've accepted my fate either way. We both have been pretty inactive(although Scott has done even less than me so far). If it's not me this time it'll probably be me next time soooo.........

SCOTT

So my Skype officially HATES ME. I literally haven't been active in the chat for what seems like weeks. Hopefully I don't go tonight. 

TREVOR

https://youtu.be/jhuTyOZlEL8

http://survivoremathia.tumblr.com/post/158332506751/tribal-council-5-olympus