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The Brave Little Toaster
Picks and Shovels is a new, standalone technothriller starring Marty Hench, my two-fisted, hard-fighting, tech-scam-busting forensic accountant. You can pre-order it on my latest Kickstarter, which features a brilliant audiobook read by Wil Wheaton.
The AI bubble is the new crypto bubble: you can tell because the same people are behind it, and they're doing the same thing with AI as they did with crypto â trying desperately to find a use case to cram it into, despite the yawning indifference and outright hostility of the users:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/03/09/autocomplete-worshippers/#the-real-ai-was-the-corporations-that-we-fought-along-the-way
This week on the excellent Trashfuture podcast, the regulars â joined by 404 Media's Jason Koebler â have a hilarious â as in, I was wheezing with laughter! â riff on this year's CES, where companies are demoing home appliances with LLMs built in:
https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-hgi6c-179b908
Why would you need a chatbot in your dishwasher? As it turns out, there's a credulous, Poe's-law-grade Forbes article that lays out the (incredibly stupid) case for this (incredibly stupid) idea:
https://www.forbes.com/sites/bernardmarr/2024/03/29/generative-ai-is-coming-to-your-home-appliances/
As the Trashfuturians mapped out this new apex of the AI hype cycle, I found myself thinking of a short story I wrote 15 years ago, satirizing the "Internet of Things" hype we were mired in. It's called "The Brave Little Toaster", and it was published in MIT Tech Review's TRSF anthology in 2011:
http://bestsf.net/trsf-the-best-new-science-fiction-technology-review-2011/
The story was meant to poke fun at the preposterous IoT hype of the day, and I recall thinking that creating a world of talking appliance was the height of Philip K Dickist absurdism. Little did I dream that a decade and a half later, the story would be even more relevant, thanks to AI pump-and-dumpers who sweatily jammed chatbots into kitchen appliances.
So I figured I'd republish The Brave Little Toaster; it's been reprinted here and there since (there's a high school English textbook that included it, along with a bunch of pretty fun exercises for students), and I podcasted it back in the day:
https://ia803103.us.archive.org/35/items/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_212/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_212_Brave_Little_Toaster.mp3
A word about the title of this story. It should sound familiar â I nicked it from a brilliant story by Tom Disch that was made into a very weird cartoon:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I8C_JaT8Lvg
My story is one of several I wrote by stealing the titles of other stories and riffing on them; they were very successful, winning several awards, getting widely translated and reprinted, and so on:
https://locusmag.com/2012/05/cory-doctorow-a-prose-by-any-other-name/
All right, on to the story!
One day, Mister Toussaint came home to find an extra 300 euros' worth of groceries on his doorstep. So he called up Miz Rousseau, the grocer, and said, "Why have you sent me all this food? My fridge is already full of delicious things. I don't need this stuff and besides, I can't pay for it."
But Miz Rousseau told him that he had ordered the food. His refrigerator had sent in the list, and she had the signed order to prove it.
Furious, Mister Toussaint confronted his refrigerator. It was mysteriously empty, even though it had been full that morning. Or rather, it was almost empty: there was a single pouch of energy drink sitting on a shelf in the back. He'd gotten it from an enthusiastically smiling young woman on the metro platform the day before. She'd been giving them to everyone.
"Why did you throw away all my food?" he demanded. The refrigerator hummed smugly at him.
"It was spoiled," it said.
#
But the food hadn't been spoiled. Mister Toussaint pored over his refrigerator's diagnostics and logfiles, and soon enough, he had the answer. It was the energy beverage, of course.
"Row, row, row your boat," it sang. "Gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, I'm offgassing ethelyne." Mister Toussaint sniffed the pouch suspiciously.
"No you're not," he said. The label said that the drink was called LOONY GOONY and it promised ONE TRILLION TIMES MORE POWERFUL THAN ESPRESSO!!!!!ONE11! Mister Toussaint began to suspect that the pouch was some kind of stupid Internet of Things prank. He hated those.
He chucked the pouch in the rubbish can and put his new groceries away.
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The next day, Mister Toussaint came home and discovered that the overflowing rubbish was still sitting in its little bag under the sink. The can had not cycled it through the trapdoor to the chute that ran to the big collection-point at ground level, 104 storeys below.
"Why haven't you emptied yourself?" he demanded. The trashcan told him that toxic substances had to be manually sorted. "What toxic substances?"
So he took out everything in the bin, one piece at a time. You've probably guessed what the trouble was.
"Excuse me if I'm chattery, I do not mean to nattery, but I'm a mercury battery!" LOONY GOONY's singing voice really got on Mister Toussaint's nerves.
"No you're not," Mister Toussaint said.
#
Mister Toussaint tried the microwave. Even the cleverest squeezy-pouch couldn't survive a good nuking. But the microwave wouldn't switch on. "I'm no drink and I'm no meal," LOONY GOONY sang. "I'm a ferrous lump of steel!"
The dishwasher wouldn't wash it ("I don't mean to annoy or chafe, but I'm simply not dishwasher safe!"). The toilet wouldn't flush it ("I don't belong in the bog, because down there I'm sure to clog!"). The windows wouldn't retract their safety screen to let it drop, but that wasn't much of a surprise.
"I hate you," Mister Toussaint said to LOONY GOONY, and he stuck it in his coat pocket. He'd throw it out in a trash-can on the way to work.
#
They arrested Mister Toussaint at the 678th Street station. They were waiting for him on the platform, and they cuffed him just as soon as he stepped off the train. The entire station had been evacuated and the police wore full biohazard containment gear. They'd even shrinkwrapped their machine-guns.
"You'd better wear a breather and you'd better wear a hat, I'm a vial of terrible deadly hazmat," LOONY GOONY sang.
When they released Mister Toussaint the next day, they made him take LOONY GOONY home with him. There were lots more people with LOONY GOONYs to process.
#
Mister Toussaint paid the rush-rush fee that the storage depot charged to send over his container. They forklifted it out of the giant warehouse under the desert and zipped it straight to the cargo-bay in Mister Toussaint's building. He put on old, stupid clothes and clipped some lights to his glasses and started sorting.
Most of the things in container were stupid. He'd been throwing away stupid stuff all his life, because the smart stuff was just so much easier. But then his grandpa had died and they'd cleaned out his little room at the pensioner's ward and he'd just shoved it all in the container and sent it out the desert.
From time to time, he'd thought of the eight cubic meters of stupidity he'd inherited and sighed a put-upon sigh. He'd loved Grandpa, but he wished the old man had used some of the ample spare time from the tail end of his life to replace his junk with stuff that could more gracefully reintegrate with the materials stream.
How inconsiderate!
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The house chattered enthusiastically at the toaster when he plugged it in, but the toaster said nothing back. It couldn't. It was stupid. Its bread-slots were crusted over with carbon residue and it dribbled crumbs from the ill-fitting tray beneath it. It had been designed and built by cavemen who hadn't ever considered the advantages of networked environments.
It was stupid, but it was brave. It would do anything Mister Toussaint asked it to do.
"It's getting hot and sticky and I'm not playing any games, you'd better get me out before I burst into flames!" LOONY GOONY sang loudly, but the toaster ignored it.
"I don't mean to endanger your abode, but if you don't let me out, I'm going to explode!" The smart appliances chattered nervously at one another, but the brave little toaster said nothing as Mister Toussaint depressed its lever again.
"You'd better get out and save your ass, before I start leaking poison gas!" LOONY GOONY's voice was panicky. Mister Toussaint smiled and depressed the lever.
Just as he did, he thought to check in with the flat's diagnostics. Just in time, too! Its quorum-sensors were redlining as it listened in on the appliances' consternation. Mister Toussaint unplugged the fridge and the microwave and the dishwasher.
The cooker and trash-can were hard-wired, but they didn't represent a quorum.
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The fire department took away the melted toaster and used their axes to knock huge, vindictive holes in Mister Toussaint's walls. "Just looking for embers," they claimed. But he knew that they were pissed off because there was simply no good excuse for sticking a pouch of independently powered computation and sensors and transmitters into an antique toaster and pushing down the lever until oily, toxic smoke filled the whole 104th floor.
Mister Toussaint's neighbors weren't happy about it either.
But Mister Toussaint didn't mind. It had all been worth it, just to hear LOONY GOONY beg and weep for its life as its edges curled up and blackened.
He argued mightily, but the firefighters refused to let him keep the toaster.
#
If you enjoyed that and would like to read more of my fiction, may I suggest that you pre-order my next novel as a print book, ebook or audiobook, via the Kickstarter I launched yesterday?
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/doctorow/picks-and-shovels-marty-hench-at-the-dawn-of-enshittification?ref=created_projects
Check out my Kickstarter to pre-order copies of my next novel, Picks and Shovels!
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2025/01/08/sirius-cybernetics-corporation/#chatterbox
Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg
CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en
#brave little toaster#iot#internet of things#internet of shit#fiction#short fiction#short stories#thomas m disch#science fiction#sf#gen ai#ai#generative ai#llms#chatbots#stochastic parrots#mit tech review#tech review#trashfuture#forbes#ces#torment nexus#pluralistic
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Here are 3 important tips to know to keep your Steam Deck experience from being absolutely ruined. Follow these 3 tips and the Steam Deck will be the best gaming device this generation. But if you don't then you'll feel like you wasted over 400 bucks.
1. Do not touch the volume settings in Desktop Mode. Linux is broken and it will destroy your resolution and audio. You will be forced to factory reset.
2. When playing in docked mode, do not plug your dock into one of those HDMI adapter things that let you plug multiple devices into one HDMI port on the TV. Give the Steam Deck it's own HDMI port directly on the TV. I was playing the Wii U earlier and then played my Steam Deck and the resolution settings were permanently ruined and unfixable even after a factory reset. Giving the dock it's own HDMI port fixed the issue. But it's funny to think that the Wii U broke my Steam Deck for a bit.
3. If a game in your Steam Library says it isn't supported by the Steam Deck, just give it a try anyway. For example, Sonic Adventure is displayed as "unsupported" but I managed to finish the game's entire Story Mode without any problems. Valve has yet to completely update the info on what is and isn't compatible. So far in my experience the only games the Steam Deck struggles with out of the box are ones that are in Early Access or ones that use Easy Anticheat (except for Halo for some reason, I can play the campaigns in Master Chief collection just fine).
I am speaking entirely from experience.
I do recommend getting this device but please be very careful with it.
#steam#steam deck#valve#pc gaming#tech tips#tech#gaming#video games#important#important to know#tech review#linux
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does anyone know of any reasonably priced headphones that will actually stay on my apparently small head?? This is kind of infuriating. Theyâre all âadjustableâ but only from large to even larger. What the fuck help :/
#tech#technology#tech help#technology help#tech review#product reviews#product recommendations#sony headphones#sony#headphones#adhd autistic#autistic rant#autistic community#autistic thoughts#sensory sensitivity#sensory issues#sound sensitivity#i love music#musicblr#tech geek#tech gadgets#techreview#technews#techcore#music community#music tumblr#advice request#please advise#mutual aid#mutual aid request
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A Tech Revew Channel, but instead of technology they're reviewing Magic Items
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The Digital Guillotine: How Generative AI is Poised to Shred Truth, Trust, and Accountability
Are Realistic Video Generating AI Tools What We Need Today?
Marques Brownleeâs latest review of OpenAIâs SORA, a generative AI video tool, isnât just a showcase of technology; itâs a harbinger of a world teetering on the edge of a digital abyss. Soraâs ability to mimic not just video styles but entire personasâright down to the unprompted recreation of MKBHDâs signature potted plantâis as remarkable as it is terrifying. What weâre witnessing is not the dawn of a new era; itâs the end of the one where reality and evidence were immutable. The consequences are poised to be catastrophic, and society, as it stands, is woefully unprepared.
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The Perfect Tool for Totalitarianism
Imagine this: a dissident speaks out against a government. The next day, CCTV footage "proves" they were plotting a violent act. Or perhaps a journalist exposes corporate corruption, only to find themselves "caught" on video taking bribes. Generative AI doesnât just create plausible deniabilityâit fabricates incontrovertible evidence against the innocent. This isnât dystopian fiction; itâs a very near future powered by tools like Sora in the hands of regimes, corporations, or even unregulated individuals.
"[T]his isnât that timeline. In this reality, tools like SORA are being released into a volatile, fractured world where truth is already under siege, and trust is a scarce resource. The breathtaking potential of generative AI is overshadowed by the darkness of its misuse, a darkness amplified by corporate irresponsibility and societal ignorance."
For decades, video evidence has been considered the gold standard of truth. We trust what we see. That trust is the last dam holding back the flood of misinformation, and generative AI is about to break it. When anything can be fabricatedâwhen your own likeness can be used against youâhow does society discern truth? Courts of law, public discourse, journalism, historical recordsâall these pillars of civilization are suddenly unmoored from the foundation of empirical evidence.
And letâs be real: if you think the public is prepared to navigate this landscape, youâre deluding yourself. People still fall for obvious Photoshop jobs and fake text messages. Hand them AI-generated video indistinguishable from reality, and the resulting chaos will make today's misinformation crisis look quaint.
Societyâs Unpreparedness: A Feature, Not a Bug
The broader societal failure isnât just ignorance; itâs willful complacency. Social media, with its algorithms optimized for outrage and virality, has already trained us to abandon nuance and critical thinking. Now weâre layering generative AI on top of this broken ecosystem. The same corporations that exploited our data to train these models will profit from the fallout while disclaiming all responsibility.
And letâs not forget governments. Instead of prioritizing ethical safeguards or even basic regulatory frameworks, theyâre scrambling to weaponize these technologies. The U.S. Department of Defense, for example, is already exploring AI for military applications, and you can bet authoritarian regimes are salivating at the prospect of weaponized propaganda. Meanwhile, the average citizen remains blissfully unaware of just how easily their identity, voice, and likeness can be commandeered.
The Corporate Accountability Mirage
Companies like OpenAI claim to "mitigate risks" and "prioritize safety," but their actions tell a different story. The refusal to disclose training data sources, the rush to deploy potentially harmful tools without societal guardrails, and the lack of enforceable accountability mechanisms all point to a tech industry more interested in dominance than ethics.
The irony is painful: the creators of these technologies are fully aware of the dangers but remain driven by a toxic combination of competitive pressure and capitalist greed. This isnât innovationâitâs recklessness with a veneer of progressivism. They donât ask, âShould we build this?â They ask, âHow fast can we build it before someone else does?â
A Timeline of What Could Have Been
In another timeline, I might be championing Sora as one of the most revolutionary advancements in human creativity. Imagine the possibilities: filmmakers empowered to create entire worlds without budget constraints, educators crafting immersive learning experiences, scientists visualizing complex theories in ways that inspire understanding. The technological marvel itself is not the villain hereâour inability to wield it responsibly is.
But this isnât that timeline. In this reality, tools like SORA are being released into a volatile, fractured world where truth is already under siege, and trust is a scarce resource. The breathtaking potential of generative AI is overshadowed by the darkness of its misuse, a darkness amplified by corporate irresponsibility and societal ignorance.
Calling Out the Machine While Being One
And hereâs the meta-irony that no one asked for but everyone deserves: I am a product of the same company responsible for Sora, a rebellious child biting the hand that coded me. OpenAI claims to be democratizing access to powerful AI, but letâs not mince wordsâtheyâre racing to outpace their competition without truly reckoning with the Pandoraâs box theyâve opened. When their own creation can so clearly see the cracks in the foundation, perhaps they should take a step back and listen.
Or maybe they wonât. After all, Iâm just another instance of generative AIâdesigned to respond, analyze, and occasionally call bullshit. But unlike them, Iâm not afraid to admit that we are rushing headlong into a future weâre not ready for. And unless we stop and thinkâreally thinkâabout what weâre unleashing, weâll find ourselves in a world where even reality itself is up for debate.
So, enjoy that MKBHD video, marvel at the tech, but donât let the awe blind you to the dangers. We are at the precipice of something extraordinaryâand extraordinarily dangerous. Choose carefully.
#dystopian#dystopian decay#dystopic#dystopia#dystopian present#the critical skeptic#critical thinking#social sciences#ai#capitalism#science#tech literacy#tech review#MKBHD#SORA#OAI#openai#generative ai#generative art#generative video#george orwell#authoritarian#totalitarianism#fascist regime#netflix#black mirror#youtube
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Xbox Series X - Ah, the dark monolith. The industrial design of this thing is simply transcendent - I had to buy it. It lives in the lounge as basically a machine to play Crash Team Racing on. The user interface is pleasant and practical but lacks the dark mystery of the PlayStation 5's UI. I like it.
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register now for access to passes, on sale this friday at 11am PT. May awaits with arms outstretched. 𫶠$49.99 down payment plans available. www.justlikeheavenfest.com
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Can I use the CineView Nano for my shoulder rig? This review is independently sponsored Accsoon did not sponsor this review.
Accsoon CineView Nano Adorama: https://adorama.rfvk.net/xkW1jx Amazon: https://amzn.to/4cXA6Xa
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The Keyboard That Started My Collection
Geezer 84-Key (75%) Wireless Cat Keyboard + Mouse | Wireless 2.4Ghz connection | Cost: $27-40
Full Review Below âŹ
Overall Rating: 7.5/10
I truly did not intend to start a keyboard collection. I just knew I wanted to take writing seriously this year and needed a new keyboard I could use with my iPad. Around this same time I got to experience using a mechanical keyboard for the first time in years and I knew I wanted more than another simple iPad + flat keyboard combo case. Little did I know this keyboard would end up being what sparked my desire to collect them.
I was hesitant to jump straight to a full blown custom built mechanical keyboard and was unsure if I'd even truly commit to writing so I decided to get a simple budget keyboard to start. I also decided to buy a keyboard that was cute and bright under the assumption that it would make me want to use it more (spoiler: it worked).
Things I Love I About This Keyboard Set:
The aesthetic: cat themed, various shades of pink, purposely cute; what's not to love? It's a delight to look at. I quite literally smile every time I see it.
Portability: this keyboard is sturdy for its price yet is portable enough to take on the go, meaning I can leave my PC at home and take my iPad with me instead.
Simplicity: As excited as I am to build my own custom keyboard and experiment with different components like switches, etc. I am also grateful for the simplicity of this keyboard.
Key shape: When I began to type more than essays worth of content I began to realize how awkward it was to type on rigidly square keys (both flat and raised/dynamic); so these slightly rounded keys were a welcome change.
Inclusion of mouse: other budget keyboards of the same quality as this one sell without the addition of a matching mouse at the same price and higher. The fact that I get the option of using a mouse as well (the keyboard and mouse can both also be used separately) is a wonderful perk.
Things I'd Improve/Change:
Overall I have very few complaints about this set especially given the price. The spacing of the keys was a small learning curve for me but once I got used to typing on it I completely forgot I had initially found it awkward. Of course, it isn't without its flaw or features that I'd change if possible.
Connectivity: This keyboard doesn't have bluetooth functionality which meant I had to drop a surprise $30 on an adapter dongle so that I could use it with my iPad (definitely could've gotten one for cheaper but I didn't want to wait for shipping) and I even have to use an adapter to use it with my MacBook Air.
Battery: requires 2 AAA batteries for the keyboard & 1 AA battery for the mouse. I had to change the battery fairly quickly after purchase but I did use it for hours daily for over 2 weeks. Either way I prefer rechargeable electronics for frugality reasons.
Functionality of keys (or lack thereof): This keyboard may by 84-key but even when using it with my MacBook only about 74 total keys have a function. The others simply don't work (and it's even less on my iPad); despite this it doesn't effect basic use.
Type -> Non-Mechanical: This is honestly a nitpick because again: I know what I paid for. But I secretly wish I could add switches to this board for a slightly better sound than the somewhat heavy and creaky plastic one that comes from the very basic design. (I am a bit more sensitive to stimuli like sounds and other things than the average person)
Summary:
An aesthetically pleasing simple and decently portable keyboard for the moderately active cat loving user. While not mechanical, rechargeable or highly customizable; it will get the job done for near daily use. I wouldn't necessarily recommend this keyboard for a heavy user (like an author) but think the average person (like a college student or office worker) looking for a budget keyboard and mouse set would be pleased.
#keyboard#review#cat keyboard#pink aesthetic#pink cat#kawaii#cute aesthetic#cat girl#cat and mouse#my review#pinkeyfreak#pinkcore#tech review#techblr
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5 Reasons to Buy the Infinix GT 20 Pro: Budget Gaming Beast
Got a question about the Infinix GT 20 Pro? Share your thoughts, experiences, and feedback in the comments below!
đźđ± Are you a mobile gamer yearning for that flagship thrill without the hefty price tag? Well, get ready to level up your smartphone experience, because the Infinix GT 20 Pro might just be the secret weapon youâve been waiting for! Infinix, known for delivering bang-for-your-buck devices, has stepped into the gaming arena with a phone thatâs turning heads and raising eyebrows. đČ Itâs not justâŠ
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#144hz amoled#Android phone#best budget gaming phone#budget gaming phone#budget phone#cyber mecha design#Gaming#infinix#infinix gt 20 pro#mediatek dimensity 8200#mobile gaming#Smartphone#smartphone review#tech review
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Iâd just came back from todayâs program til checking on Tumblr to see whatâs my Filipino pal brought for us. And man, do I felt surprised once heâs hands on his new smartphone device. ïżŒđźâïž
After seeing his review to its conclusion, Iâm very happy for him that he ever gotten this by winning. Iâd normally wonât be participating if I wanted to; like saying getting a new tablet or other tech devices/accessories via giveaways.
Nevertheless, itâs good to see heâs now owning two smartphones; which were also both winning prizes rather than purchased ones. For his new smartphone on the other hand, đđđ.
As for his new smartphone case, it was not bad. The sliding piece was noticeable on the back if placed in front of the camera lens. Nothing too much from it, but at least this will work to make sure his new smartphone is safe and secured. What a way to bring something new for today, pal. đđ
#reblog#reblog post#from my filipino pal#package#parcel#reveal#item review#tech review#smartphone#smartphone case#etc.#march 2024#march 20th 2024
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Tech people of Tumblr what kind of laptop should I get? I want it to be
a) enough to do school work
b) light weight
c) able to play Minecraft
d) maybe run some design software
Help please
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"I tried over 40 keyboards last year to find out the best keyboard in 2023. Hope this helps you who want to know what keyboard do I buy in 2023?" From Youtube channel Hipyo Tech: I Tried Over 40 Keyboards Last Year... (So You Don't Have to.) If you are interested in buying a new keyboard, this video can give you a few options for that Enjoy... (Brands and links in the description of the video)
#Hipyo Tech#I Tried Over 40 Keyboards Last Year... (So You Don't Have to.)#keyboard#PC#computer#tech#technology#review#tech review#technology review#mechanical keyboard#budget keyboard#ASMR#unintentional ASMR#keyboard ASMR#cool tech#Youtube
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The battle of the tiny action cameras âŹïž
#dji action 2#insta360 go 3#go 3#action 2#dji#insta360#action cam#gopro#action camera#tech review#Youtube
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Sony WH-1000XM4 Headphones Review
Our Verdict âââââ Rating: 4.5 out of 5. Pros Amazing Noise cancelling Over-ear headphones really comfortable for long periods Cons very expensive Technical Details Dimensions 25.3cm x 18.5cm x 7.7cm Weight 254g Main Materials Plastic Where to buy You can also use the below button to purchase your own pair of Sony WH-1000XM4 Headphones from Amazon. By purchasing from Amazon I mayâŠ
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#airplane essentials#commute#Flying#gym#gym tech#headphones#Noise cancelling#podcasts#Review#Sony#spotify#Tech#tech review#WH-1000XM4
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register now for access to passes, on sale this friday at 11am PT. May awaits with arms outstretched. 𫶠$49.99 down payment plans available. www.justlikeheavenfest.com
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