#tbh the person i was writing about was a massive part of my life
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The Other Woman
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Synopsis: Where Miguel leaves Y/N to go back to a different version of his old wife found in another universe.
Pair: Miguel O’Hara x Spider!Reader
Tags: ANGST!!, long term established relationship, heartbreak, marriage, cheating, mental health, cold/distant Miguel
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A/N: Hi! I don’t really write at all!!
I have been a silent reader on tumblr for years but this idea has been playing in my mind so much I had the urge to write it. I have been down so bad for Miguel been on his tag like 24/7 indulging in all the content creators have been putting out. So I’m excited to join in giving content, however keep in mind I kinda suck! Apologies for any mistakes, anything confusing, or it not being well written enough. Honestly could have made this into multiple parts with better details but nah. Tried my best ^^ since it’s my first time, any feedback is greatly appreciated!
Honestly tbh we all don’t have a solid grasp how the whole canon thing and multi universe works yet so!! A lot of what is written is made up to suit my storyline so please don’t get mad about the inaccuracies.
I love a good angst and today’s story will be EXTRAAA angsty!!! As well kinda long!!
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The moment that changed your life was while working on an experiment during your college finals. You were a proud and gifted physics major that was so passionate about discovering and exploring what the world didn’t know.
You had snuck into Alchemax late at night. You wanted to show your professors just how much you could do with the right tools. Next thing you know, playing with their machines, you had spawned a spider right in-front of you. The glowing vibrant red spider had sunk its jaw into your hand.
Your life did a complete turn and you spent the rest of that week freaking out while changes to your body were happening. Causing you to fail your semester after missing exams. Things felt like it could only get worse when a massive blue suited masked man showed up out of nowhere in your dorm interrogating you.
“Where’s the spider?” He had a strong grip on your shoulders. You couldn’t focus while trying to process why this man had what seemed like claws sticking out of the ends of his fingers.
“I don’t know, it like died after it bit me!” You exclaimed nervously at the freakishly strong man. Trying to reach for anything behind you to use as a defense weapon.
“Dios mío no me digas eso…” He groaned loudly letting you go. Having the opportunity to grab something, you threw a sanrio plushie at him. Only causing him to wave his arms in annoyance. “That spider is from my earth and somehow you brought it here. Now you’re a spider-man.”
And the rest is history…
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You learned that the man was Miguel O’Hara and when he found you he was just starting his missions with the multiverse. You being the few of the firsts to join his team.
Your situation was quite bizarre and he called you an anomaly for a long time, spending hours studying you and also training you. You ended up being the one case that can’t be explained no matter how much effort was put into monitoring you.
Almost like it was meant to be. Your universe remained perfect with its current spider-man doing fine. No big collapse of a black hole or anything. When you got bit by a spider from Earth-928 your DNA merged with that universe making you fit in perfectly. You were one of the only spider-people with an uncertain timeline with new canons being created depending on what universe you were in.
What changed from you being just a piece of research for Miguel is when he then realized that maybe you were a gift from the multiverse. After all the grief and pain he’d went through the universe had given him this person that worked out perfectly no matter how hard he tried to push them away. You fell head over heels for him and vice versa, all while canon events were being created with both of you together.
You were there as his team grew, slowly turning into a family. Then both of you getting married finalizing that this was your home. Everything felt perfect. Although a relationship with Miguel could have its up and down days, nothing could ever tear you both apart. Or so you assumed.
—
“I’m sorry Y/N.” Miguel couldn’t look at you.
“When did this start? Please be honest with me. Did I do something wrong?” You begged at him. You knew he was acting off recently but never did you think it would result to this.
You watched as he exhaled deeply staring at the ground. You felt like you couldn’t breathe as you studied his face trying to grasp onto any emotion he was showing. The atmosphere in his office felt so cold. You so badly wanted to catch his gaze and find the warmth and love his red irises used to give you. He was doing everything to push you away. He was abandoning you.
“You did nothing wrong. I met her during a mission 4 months ago.” Was all he replied.
“Who is she?” Your heart kept breaking. His face hardening as the question slipped through your lips. You knew Miguel wouldn’t leave you for just anyone. Deep in your heart you knew what this was about. He never responded but he didn’t need to when you saw his eyes flicker over to his monitor screens. You followed his trace and saw the photo of Gabriella in the corner.
“Does she have another version of your daughter?” You tried again. This is what made him look directly at you. Miguel kept opening and closing his month unsure how to tell you the truth. You weren’t stupid and he knew that. After everything he couldn’t just walk out on you with a lie.
“No.” He paused thinking of how to finally share the truth without it ruining you. There was no way out of this. “She is a younger version of herself. There is no Miguel in her universe and she’s not important to the timeline. She lives a regular life. I-it’s a chance for me to start at the very beginning.”
You felt your heart being ripped out of your chest. You processed the words carefully. She doesn’t have a child yet… Not only was he leaving you for her but he was going to fall in love with her all over again and start a family with her. A family you wanted so badly to have with him.
“What about with what happened last time you tried to live a life in a different universe?” You didn’t understand how this was happening.
He was always so carful he would never do anything to cause that again. Everything you had witness Miguel work so hard for to keep safe for years. Sleepless nights, returning bruised and beaten, frustrations and constant stress. Was it all for nothing? Is he throwing all his work away?
“This is different.” He turned away from you. “I pushed myself then into an already established life. This time I am creating that life. After all the research we did on you…” He knew that this was going to tear you apart. “I learned that if done right I could have a child from two different universes that won’t disrupt anything.”
It clicked to you then that all the research he was doing on you lately was for this. The research he did on you that time was different, personal, intimate even. As he was testing your DNAs together and seeing the outcomes. He mentioned a child and you were foolish enough to assume he was doing research to see what it would be like if you both had one together. You were giddy even as you watched him work. You had both spoken about having a family together in the past but had been too busy with spider activities. You thought it was a sign of him getting more serious about it, knowing how badly he wanted one. You would have never thought he was doing it to see how he could get back his previous child. The one you could never give him.
You had truly believe that Miguel had recovered from his obsession that his grief gave him. He accidentally destroyed a whole universe needing that life back so badly. You had spent late nights watching him re-watch clips over and over of what he had lost. It slowly stopped once your relationship blossomed with him and you thought he was ready to move on and start new. Why would you have never thought that with such a perfect opportunity presented to him that he wouldn’t drop everything for it.
“I think it’s best that you leave.” He spoke with a soft tone. As if not looking at you any longer will make the problem go away. You couldn’t wrap your mind around how he was just throwing you away like this. As if he wasn’t making you dinner, giving soft kisses, whispering I-love-you’s not so long ago.
You felt too choked up to ask anymore questions. Your throat tight and painful as you held back tears from escaping in-front of Miguel. You just nodded and headed straight out the door not being able to handle another second in that room. Your knees and hands were shaky as you speed walked into the nearest bathroom and let it all out.
—
It didn’t take long for everyone else to know something had happened. Everyone had gotten used to seeing you and him sitting together at lunch. You would make him cute lunch boxes and everyone would gag a bit while watching the two of you smile together. Some cringing seeing their scary boss being so soft around you. It was a big surprise when Miguel started to eat alone with a bag of take out food and you no where to be seen.
His teams he sent out for missions were all confused when you weren’t assigned to anything. Knowing you were one of the best, one of them slipped out a “Call for Y/N!” In the middle of fighting an anomaly too strong for them. Miguel only looked away.
It wasn’t until a new woman showed up in Miguel’s office with a grip around his waist. That’s when the spider-community realized that this was way worse than they thought.
��
You on the other hand had spilled everything to Hobie when he caught you that day leaving the bathroom with puffy eyes. You had been staying with him in his universe until you could gather yourself together to return to HQ. You knew you were going to leave for good, but you needed to go back to retrieve all your things. You couldn’t stay with Hobie forever. Worse that you weren’t from there.
You still had some hope that Miguel would come looking for you and tell you that he was all wrong. However almost two months had passed and not a word from him… That’s when you knew it was time you should return to what you once knew.
Stepping into the portal Hobie followed close behind you. He told the few others who were once close to both you and Miguel that you would be visiting. Stepping through the portal you were immediately greeted by Jessica and Peter B Parker.
“Oh, Y/N.” Jess sighed your name sadly while pulling you into a hug. You felt like you wanted to cry all over again. Missing your friends so much. Peter B came behind giving you a hug on the side.
“He’s on a mission right now.” Peter spoke up. “It might be a long one too but don’t waste anytime just incase.”
You nodded pulling away from them. Looking up around the headquarters building faintly smiling at the past memories you had here. You started heading to different areas gathering all the little things you had left around. Hobie had stitched for you a cute backpack with different scraps of patterned clothes and covered in patches of punk band logos but made with hammer space technology. Making it fun for you to fill endless of your things in the bag.
The last stop was in Miguel’s office. Doubt started to fill your mind; maybe he already threw out all of your stuff. Why would he even keep it after all of this? What no one could warn you of was the other person sitting on his platform.
“Hello!” She chirped at you. It felt like the air in your lungs had just been punched out. You knew her too well. From all the photos and videos you had seen peaking over Miguel’s shoulder. However seeing her in person was something you had never expected. You knew it wasn’t the original her but it was a copy paste image for sure.
“Hi.” Was all you managed to choke out. She was beautiful, stunning. You could see clearly now the similar features she shared in another universe with her daughter. The parts that Miguel didn’t have. She kept smiling kindly at you, almost in a graceful way. You started to feel all your insecurities start eating you up from the inside. How could you have ever compared to her.
“What’s your name? I don’t think I’ve seen you here before.” Getting off Miguel’s platform she walked closer to you. The room started to feel suffocating.
“Y/N.”
“Well, it’s nice to meet you! It’s nice to meet other girls around here.”
Your eyebrows furrowed as you realized she had no reaction to your name. So Miguel never told her about you… Or that the fact was he was still even legally married to you.
“My boyfriend isn’t here right now but, if you want, I can tell him you stopped by.” She continued as you stayed silent.
“Oh, no it’s okay. I just came in here to get some stuff.” You rushed as you really wanted nothing to do with Miguel at all. You almost worried that he might even get angry knowing you got to speak with her. If he already dislikes you this much you couldn’t even imagine how he would feel if you got in the way of this for him.
You started heading over to the familiar drawers around the room. Grabbing your old hoodies and shirts finding your most comfortable of things here. You treated this place as one of your safe spaces as you used to spend so much time here.
“Oh I didn’t know these were all yours! I was wondering why this was all around. When I came here I wanted to do some spring cleaning but Miguel wouldn’t let me touch anything.” She followed besides you. “It’s so mind blowing seeing all this technology. We don’t have any of this where I live-“ She continue rambling but you started to zone her out. You felt like you were about to have a panic attack any minute. There was one question that kept burning in your mind.
“Are you and Miguel already planning to have a child?” You blurted out. Your eyes widened a bit as you surprised yourself. She let out a loud laugh.
“Oh dear no! We have only been together about 6 months. You must be new around here so you must not know much about us.” She chuckled.
In some cruel way you were hoping she would have said yes. You had that twisted hope of maybe Miguel just keeping her to have a kid and ditching her after he gets Gabriella and run back to you. In reality he was playing the long game, he really meant it when we said he was starting over. “He’s never mentioned kids anyways. I’m not even sure if he’d like them or do well with them.”
With that statement she made you looked at her appalled. Anyone could see in Miguel how good of a father he could be. Just in the way he takes care of the society he built here. You started to realize that she really has been left in the dark. She doesn’t know anything. She probably doesn’t even know that she’s a replacement of another self. You wondered why Miguel was doing this. It felt like he didn’t just toy with you but with her as well. A man you came to love for how selfless he was, to realize now everything was for his own personal gain. Suddenly you started to feel bad for her. You couldn’t dislike her, she wasn’t doing anything wrong and she doesn’t even know.
“I got all my stuff. Nice to meet you.” Was all you could say as you zipped up your bag and turned straight around out of there. Not giving any glance back at her, you left to one of the empty training rooms to recollect your overwhelming thoughts. All of the self healing you tried the past month thrown in the garbage.
It wouldn’t be too soon that news of you going around the building was returned to Lyla. You had cut out all coms while you were gone so she immediately popped up on your watch when she found out.
“AH-“ You jumped as the tiny AI was suddenly in front of your face.
“It’s so wonderful to see you Y/N. Oh my god!”She started. Then she went on rambling about how she knew everything and had seen everything. How she didn’t agree with what was happening and was doing everything she could to convince you to stay. After 5 minutes of her rambling you stopped her to let your emotions out.
“Lyla, Lyla It’s okay. Just stop. It’s all complicated I know, but this didn’t work out. I wished Miguel just cheated on me like all the other fucked up normal men out there. That I walked in on him deep in another random girl. Though painful I could have tried fixing and fighting for us. But instead what I got was him emotionally cheating on me and chase after something he knows I can never give him.” You felt yourself choke up. “I can never ask him to give up what he longs and dreams for just for me to be happy. I lost this battle the moment he laid eyes on her.”
Finding comfort in the AI your husband made. You’ve created a bond with Lyla that Miguel found cute but you knew now this might be the last time you’ll be speaking with her.
“You can give him a family y/n… you guys have been married two years now. I know you’ve both set the thought aside until the multiverse issues are better but you can fight for him. You have to snap him out of his fantasy. He still thinks about you.”
“Lyla you know deep down truly he never just wanted a family. He wanted exactly what he had. What he lost. Which should be impossible but being by his side seeing how insane the multiverse is… Good for him for believing in something so hard he’s found himself even a third chance to do it.”
“I hate that you’re being too kind about this situation.” Lyla paced around you.
“I love him so deeply Lyla. You know that very well. It’s so hard to suddenly hate him. I am angry, but I’m also emotionally drained I can’t do this.” You let out a deep sigh. “I’ve watched him long for this family when we just met. For some stupid reason when things worked out for us I thought I would be enough… When we got engaged and he would spend some days at home with me not even coming to HQ. I thought he was finally moving on not just from his grief and past but from the weight of his work. I saw a bright future for us.”
“You can still have a bright future with him! You moving here gave him a new canon event, another chance at life in his timeline. Here in his own universe! He’s just too obsessed and he’s lost himself in that.” She exclaimed with her hands up.
“Our canon event was our wedding.” Your frowned deepened. “But the universe didn’t say anything else after. It doesn’t say our canon event means we are suppose to live happily together forever I guess.”
“I’m just trying my best to be optimistic. I rooted so hard for you and Miguel when you joined the team. I know you can remember the amount of times I would force you both in rooms.” Lyla recalled.
“And I’m grateful for it… Even if this didn’t work out. I was given precious memories, not just working with you and being on this team but falling in love with Miguel. I know I’m being all depressed and hopeless but I feel like even if I move on I’ll never be able to replace him and find a relationship like this again. However he threw me away so easily and maybe he never valued me as much as I did to him.” You felt your emotions bubble. “I became who I am here. I’m going to miss everyone so much.”
“You can still stay here and work with us.” She edged on.
“I can’t just sit around here begging at his feet to return to me or moping around doing missions while watching him with someone else. I want to hate him so badly. I know he’s your boss and you’re basically hardwired to do everything for him and you’re trying your hardest to fix what you think is his right path. But think of me a little more and how miserable it’ll be. I’m the only one hurting here.”
Lyla paused and stared at you with an almost glossy-eyed look. While she worked she could see the inner term-oil Miguel was hiding and the emptiness he was turning to since trying to start new in the other universe. It just wasn’t her place to hold this conversation and he was the one who needed to get a grip of himself and really think and talk with you. She can’t be the one trying to mend the pieces for both of you together. What Miguel did was so wrong. She knew you were right and she didn’t want to see any more damage be caused to you.
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” She looked up at you sincerely. “I hate this outcome for you. Not only are you loosing your husband but your home. When was the last time you’ve even been in your universe?”
“Like a year ago for a mission…”
“Exactly! Even if things are over with Miguel, you have all of us here! I wish you could stay. I understand you leaving, I really do. I know a lot of us will try visiting you but I’m tied to Miguel…” You started to see how it clicked for her too that it’s most likely you might not see each other for a long time. “Even if a spider-person is visiting you I can’t just show up on their watch… It’ll go back to him and I know you wouldn’t want that. I know I’m an AI and I can’t hold real emotions but I mean it when I say I’m going to miss you.”
Tears poured down your cheeks as her words hit you. Going back to your universe is going to be a struggle. You have nothing there now. However nothing can compare to the pain of the outcome you’ve had with Miguel, and you needed out of here ASAP. Your mental health getting worse the longer you stay. Even the other spiders you have come to love can’t bring that spark back right now. You needed genuine time for yourself, even if it’s self destructive, instead of putting on a fake smile everyday here.
“Bye, Lyla.” You whispered. She nodded and waved her hand goodbye at you before disappearing. You took your watch off your wrist placing it on a nearby desk. With it you pulled the divorce paperwork out of your pocket neatly sealed and already signed on your half. Opening a portal you took your last glances at the place you spent so many loving memories in.
Tears blurred your vision as you stepped through the portal. Once your legs landed on a rooftop of a building in your dimension, you racked out full sobs falling to your knees.
You were always just the other woman.
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Thank you so much for reading!! I know it was a longer one ~
would anyone like a part 2? If so anyone want a angsty or happy ending? I think it’ll be more in Miguel’s perspective as well!
EDIT: You can now read PART 2 here
#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o’hara imagine#atsv miguel#spiderman 2099#miguel o’hara x y/n#miguel o’hara angst#spiderman imagine#across the spiderverse#miguel o'hara#x reader#spiderman#fanfiction#miguel o’hara fanfiction#spiderman x reader
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making miguel blush by touching his muscles and teasing him w over dramatic “ooh” and “ah’s” 🤭🤭
i like the way you think anon :> (tbh this is what i had in mind for reader in the jealous miggy fic, MAYBE I'LL WRITE A BONUS SCENE TO THE ORIGINAL FIC, WOULD Y'ALL LIKE THAT ...)
(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)
one way to get you to shut up. – miguel o'hara x reader
miguel never usually lets anybody touch him, let alone get up close and personal with him; but you were always the only one he permitted to get closer to him, to be within a closer proximity, because... your presence was calming, comforting to him—dare he say being in your presence is proof that he interacts with other human beings and doesn't stay cooped up in that dim, dark office of his like a hermit. though the worst part about being in your presence is that you knew every way to push his buttons, to send him over the edge with your snarky, cocky demeanor. maybe you meant to, maybe you didn't, but the way you spoke to him whenever he let you touch him... hell, the way you even did touch him was so hypnotic, enticing... it was hard to deny, it did something to miguel.
"wow, miggy... you have quite the biceps." you'd purr to him with a cheeky grin on your face as you ran you soft fingers up and down the curves of his bulging muscles. miguel nodded, knowing you had much more than that to say about his build. you sighed as you soon brought your other hand to caress the grooves and bumps of his arm. your hands made their way to his broad shoulders, with you whispering all sweetly how massive his frame looked. you gently ran your fingers over his chest and gave a small, "ooh..." at the feeling of his pectoral muscles that were underneath the nanotech suit. you repeated this cycle of teasing miguel for his beautifully sculpted frame, making sure every bit of him was touched and admired greatly, mainly with little "ah"s and "ooh"s.
his breath kept hitching in his chest and throat, his commanding voice that was about to tell you to shut up, to get your hands off him in a low growl was silenced every time he heard you praise every bit of his excellent figure. his breath came out all raggedy and labored, his exhale shook as it left his body, in unison with you sighing as you teased how delectable his muscles seemed underneath that suit. "c'mon, miggy... give me a fun time, would ya?" you asked him with a giggle as miguel seized your hand that reached out for his face and stared down at you with a hint of red in those dashing, yet deadly, eyes of his. his face remained stoic as a statue as he leaned in closer to you, his breath hot and beating against your face as he practically snarled his answer: "don't be too bold with me now."
and with that, you had finally been silenced. miguel's face was flustered and had a forced expression of sternness on it—but deep down... he had yearned for you to touch him again, to praise him for his one of a kind body that you loved feeling up and sneaking glances of, and feeling your lips against his as you told him you... loved him, not just for his body, but for who he is. even if the guy he is was pretty intimidating and no-nonsensical, he yearned for the day when you could quit the teasing (or keep teasing him until he melts out of sheer embarrassment) and just... kiss him already, make him yours; his body, his mind, his heart, his life—he'd give it all to you in a heartbeat.
tags !! @miguelswifey04 @hearts4gabri @capnshtfce @fictarian @yuridopted0 @luvstarrstruck @melovetitties @arachnoia @ophanimgold @popeheywardssecretgf @meeom @simsrandomstuff @fable-library @hisachuu @wreakingmarveloushavok
#miguel o'hara#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o'hara x you#miguel o'hara x y/n#miguel o'hara fanfiction#miguel o'hara fluff#x reader#atsv x reader#atsv fluff#atsv fanfiction#spiderman 2099#spiderman 2099 x reader#spiderverse x reader#across the spiderverse x reader#spiderman across the spiderverse x reader#spiderman across the spiderverse fluff#spiderman across the spiderverse fanfiction#spiderman across the spiderverse imagines#atsv miguel x reader#miguel atsv x reader
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What you said about Miss Raven going from being an "onlooker"/more of a side character to being the main character of her own story really resonated with me 🥲 and tbh it inspires me to try and give my own ocs some more story/value in canon... bc I tend to always purposefully make characters that can "blend in the background", or like... that could work as side characters if they were canon. Not really invisible, but not quite important either. But your work has inspired me to try and push my own boundaries a little bit and try to make a character that could work as one of the main cast... ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ
Also, unrelated to my first point but- reading Raven going against her "destiny" and remembering some posts you did a while back really gave me EAH vibes in the best way possible 🥹 I love whenever a writer's inspo can shine through their own writings. Which made me think... I think Miss Raven could fit very well into the EAH universe (from what I recall about it)! I mean, we already have someone with the same name there 😭 But ignoring that, I'd love to see a "what if...!?" of her in the EAH world someday, if you ever would like to do smth like that HAHDHHSDH
( No more permanent ink, this is not what you think 🎶 )
Twst x Ever After High AU discussion: part 1 / part 2 / part 3
Oooh, I’m glad you found some meaning in that aspect of her story! I think finding one’s confidence is something a lot of us struggle with, especially if the people we spend our time around seem so much stronger or more skilled than we are. In the world of fandom, maybe that feeling translates into being shy about sharing our very personal creations with the world. That’s also a common sentiment, and I wanted it to resonate with my readers.
For me, a large part of the appeal of Twst is that every character has their own life and feels organic in the world. It’s not like they’re only ever seen in class or with certain other characters. They go to places, act and think for themselves, interact with everyone in unique ways. I like to think the mob students are like this too, even if we don’t see much of them. Everyone is out there doing their own thing, and that’s so beautiful. I hope you’re able to make something like that, if that is what you wish for.
Yes, EAH and Princess Tutu (which is also very fairy-tale laden) were massive inspirations for me ✨ I've never really thought about inserting Raven into worlds outside of Twst though. I know some people like to repurpose their preexisting OCs to plop into various franchises, but I'm the type that tends to make OCs specific to them. Twisted Wonderland is Miss Raven's comfy home! I wouldn't stop other people's imaginations though www
#disney twisted wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland#disney twst#notes from the writing raven#question#twst oc#twisted wonderland oc#Raven Crowley#EAH#ever after high#princess tutu#feedback for the writing raven
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27JSC ❧ teaser [sungchan]
❧ teaser word count: 768 | full fic: 21.3k ❧ warnings: once again everything i know about hockey is from the internet and only for this fic i’m sorry, blood/injury mention ❧ genre: fluff, sooo much fluff they’re sooo in love tbh, quite a bit of hurt/comfort sprinkled in, established relationship, college au, hockey captain sungchan, chronically ill reader (chronic migraines), christmas-y for a couple scenes in the middle, sequel to buzzer beater ❧ extra info: this is the sequel to buzzer beater, which you should definitely read before this one so you know what’s going on! the reader in this has chronic migraines, which i have. when the reader’s migraines, experiences as a chronically ill person, and thoughts about being chronically ill are described, that is me writing directly from my own life. i am not generalizing the lives of all people with chronic migraines/chronic illnesses, but i am sending all my love to any readers out there living with a chronic illness, and here’s a reminder to go take your meds! ❧ estimated release: saturday, december 16, 2023 2:00 p.m. eastern time
“My head hurts,” he announced, sounding downright pitiful.
“Really? Your head hurts?” You pouted at him, getting on your tiptoes to pull down your massive first aid kit from your cabinet.
“Uh-huh.”
“Aw, my poor Sungchannie,” you cooed, setting the huge first aid kit down on the coffee table and popping it open.
The apartment heating had kicked on, so you finally took off your heavy parka and overcoat as well, leaving you just in the base lounge clothes you’d been in before you’d hurried to get dressed with the urgent texts from Sicheng.
First, you tipped a couple of over-the-counter painkillers into his waiting hand, and he knocked them back with a sip from his water bottle.
Grabbing a couple alcohol swabs and boxes of bandages, you asked, “Okay, Hello Kitty, spaceships, or Pokémon?”
“Mm… What kind of Pokémon?”
“First gen. I think it’s mostly Gengars and Psyducks left in there.”
“A Gengar please,” he requested sweetly.
You fished a bandage out, pre-ripping the end of the packaging before setting it on the arm of the couch. Standing in between Sungchan’s legs as he was reclined back on your couch, you leaned over him, very gingerly brushing his hair back from his forehead so you could see the injury better. Thankfully, the bleeding had stopped between the rink and your place, all clotted blood and the start of scabs. Less thankfully for him, you were about to sanitize all of that. Gently turning his head so you could get better light, you tore open the first alcohol wipe and lightly touched it to the very edge of where you thought the wound started. Sungchan’s forehead wrinkled, but he didn’t make a sound. You continued at your task for another second before he finally spoke up.
“Y/N.”
“Sorry, I know it stings, but I’m almost done.” You promised. “I’d go faster but the lighting isn’t great in here, and some of it goes into your hair.”
“Don’t you think you’d be able to see better…” A pair of hands grabbed your hips, encouraging you closer, closer, down, down, until you were straddling Sungchan's lap, a knee on either side of him. “Like this?”
You were about to make a retort, except this tragically did get your own head out of the way enough to stop casting a shadow where you needed. So instead, you looked down at him with an eyebrow raised.
“How injured are you, really?” You questioned, pink-tinged alcohol wipe still in hand.
“So injured,” he fake-whined, settling his hands on your thighs.
“I’m sure.” But you made no move to leave, instead leaning in and getting back to work cleaning up the area.
Sungchan provided no more obvious distraction to you as you did so, seeming content to just smooth his thumbs over your clothed thighs and trace shapes there with his fingers. When you were finally able to see where the skin was split, you frowned, using your fingers to part his hair and inspect how far back it went.
“How long do I have, Doc?” He joked.
“You’ll live, but the bandages aren’t going to help the part that’s in your hair,” you forewarned. “That means be gentle when shampooing while its healing.”
“Sounds complicated. What if I mess it up? I think you should do it for me,” he suggested with a smirk, fingertips playing with the hem of your sweatshirt— well, really it was his sweatshirt, but he’d forfeited it to you some time ago.
“Is there something about getting injured that just turns you into a horndog?” You scoffed. For emphasis, you pinched the sliver of skin on his stomach that was exposed where his own t-shirt had ridden up above the hem of his pants and boxers.
He sat up then, forcing you to lean back to avoid smacking faces, but he just chased you forward until you were nearly nose-to-nose.
“No, there’s something about you being so worried and taking such good care of me that makes me want to show you how much I adore… you… back...” He punctuated the last three words with kisses that went up your neck to your jaw.
You looked up at the ceiling, as if pretending to consider this reason. But the happy smile that was working its way across your lips clearly gave away the fact that your mind was already made up. You snaked a hand between the two of you to push him back against the couch by the chest and hold him there. “Alright, but at least let me put this Gengar bandage on you first, hm?”
⤷ blog masterlist
#sungchan x reader#riize x reader#sungchan imagines#riize imagines#jungsung#sungchan imagine#riize imagine#nct x reader#nct imagine#nct imagines#jung sungchan#i: sungchan#f: 27jsc#27jsc: teaser#writing#text#mine#bias tag#surprise bb2 teaser!#*100
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Idk if this is weird to ask but can you tell more about your situationship?😭 I’m curious since it inspired the story idkkk
nooo not weird at all haha, i had plans to share more ab it once i was done w kickoff but i dont really mind sharing a bit now (will literally always take up any chance to talk ab it it’s an impulse i cannot resist)
basically i met this guy like halfway through my freshman year of college at a frat event, it was a bit different from kickoff dynamic in that we started hooking up pretty soon after that, just a casual thing, but then the pandemic hit and so he went back home to live w his grandpa/family in new york (i live in cali) once campus shut down and stuff. obviously we couldn’t hook up anymore LMFAO but we still talked a lot and i think it was during this time of just talking to one another that i really started to catch massive feelings for him :”)
i went through some bad anxiety during covid, struggling a lot w my career and if i still wanted to pursue the things i thought i wanted (i think a lot of college students went through this w the pandooski) but he would always be there for me and would stay on facetime calls w me if i was struggling to study, he’d cheer me up w pics of his tibetan dogs lol, just reallyyy sweet ugh when we were long distance i rly saw a side of him i didn’t before and i think that’s what made me fall for him
i confessed to him first, similar to reader in kickoff, n told him we could do long distance until he moved back here. but then he hit me with the “i’m sorry, i can’t date you, i’ve got commitment issues”. in his case, he had a long-term girlfriend in high school for four years who he also was dating into college (before he met me), but he found out she had been cheating on him for a long time w not just one but multiple of his friends 😭 so..he said he has really bad trust issues, and that he really wanted to try to date me, but he just felt like he couldn’t
i was really hurt, obviously, but i think in hindsight maybe it was a responsible decision on his part to not throw me into a mess of a relationship w him, one he knew he wasn’t ready for. but at the time, i just thought that it was bc i wasn’t good enough to change his mind. anyways, he asked if we could still talk and be friends, and i said sure bc i didn’t really want to lose him. i figured i could just wait for him (and i told him that i would)
yeahhh well the waiting was way more fucking painful than i thought. he flew to cali once to visit me when flights were sort of resuming, which is just fucking insane because you’ll fly to see me but you won’t date me 😭, and i told him that it’d be the last time he ever sees me! and it was :”) maybe it was an impulsive decision by me, but idk. yknow when you get stuck in a limbo for what feels like forever that you make a decision just for the sake of making one (it was such a short amt of time in reality, but it felt like forever) he made a comment to me in our last conversation about how he really wished he didn’t have to be someone i had to wait on to change, and that really fuckin stuck w me lmao i cried so hard the drive home from the airport. i think all the “what-ifs” kinda sunk in at that moment
ch7 of kickoff was basically me trying to get inside the head of the guy from my situationship, and see what it’s like to have fears hold you back from wanting to experience something for yourself, something that could be beautiful if you would just give it a chance. i felt like if i wrote it from that angle, i’d have more understanding of my situationship (i dont have commitment issues myself, tbh i’ve never rlly understood the concept. like, i’ve been fucked over by ppl in my life too but i’m never one to punish the next person for it. dealing w my situationship was really hard because of this, i would get really frustrated, but writing ch7 from gojo’s character’s perspective made situationship guy’s feelings make more sense to me, i think, there was a sense of closure in that)
but anyways, i was in love w him for sure. like, possibly infatuated. there was a time where we got into a big argument about something and i think i legit i cried myself into a fever 💀 it was all so crazy and powerful, the feelings, i’ve been involved w n dated other guys since but of course none of it really compares. idk, i guess there are just some people that can make you feel that way, there’s really no use in understanding why.
this sounds so sappy, lmaoo i swear i truly am “over” him in that i hardly think of him that much anymore, n tbh i don’t think of him specifically all that much while i’m writing kickoff, but there are moments where i can’t help but bring those feelings into the story.
there’s a line in ch8, near the end of the bed scene, where reader has a thought like
“You feel so safe with him, and yet you also feel scared, because you like him so much that you would let him ruin you if he wanted to.”
yeah. that’s basically how i felt about him.
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Archive-locking the fics that YOU WROTE and are thus 100% yours to decide what to do with 'hurting people' is so silly tbh. Skill issue on their part. Wish those people could be normal about the amazing fics that writers like you put out & be understanding or at the very least respectful of the choices that writers make about how and where they make their fics available. Especially in light of recent ai training theft and nonsense & all that.
I hope this doesn't sour the fic writing & sharing experience for you too much. I love your writing & think you're very talented & skilled!
There seem to be dual attitudes I'm coming up against recently (and obviously these are not held by everyone, I don't even know that they are held by a majority, but they are certainly held by a plurality).
The first is that authors should be grateful that readers deign to read what they put out there. I think this stems from the "content creation" mentality and the idea that everyone who posts things wants as massive as an audience as possible (for monetization purposes which... isn't a thing in fanfic). I think this mindset also leads to readers demanding that people write specific tropes/pairings/whatever, or threatening basically to take their business elsewhere. "Nobody will read unless you do [X]." 1. Not true and 2. Okay, you weren't my audience.
(I also think authors circulating those posts about how badly they want comments/kudos feeds this mentality of readers doing authors a favor by even clicking on the fic. "Wow, if people are so desperate for attention, then mine must be worth an awful lot!")
Fanfic ain't a business, and I write for myself. Readers choosing to read my work isn't a privilege or an honor they are bestowing upon me (nor are comments for that matter), just as me posting my writing where they can see it isn't a privilege or an honor for them. We are both engaging in hobbies and a love of some media, and sometimes we will overlap and connect and sometimes we won't. Readers aren't reading out of altruism for attention-starved authors, and authors aren't writing out of altruism for content-hungry readers.
And there are those who will read these paragraphs above and think to themselves "wow, what an ungrateful author," and that's exactly the attitude I'm talking about. Don't get me wrong, it's delightful and rewarding to receive comments on fics and chat with people about Blorbo and the Situations. But it should be delightful from both sides of the exchange, or why the hell are we doing this? If I'm meant to be grateful for every commenter who jumps into my inbox, then every commenter in my inbox better be grateful for me, and I can tell you right now there is a population who is not. There is a population who sees me as a service provider for their entertainment, and whatever form I take in their brain, it is not shaped like a full person.
This attitude also leads to people thinking that things like lorefm are no big deal. Don't I want to get my work in front of more eyeballs (or ears)? Don't I want to broaden my audience? And once I put my work out there for readers to see, should I be shocked (or express any negative emotions at all) when someone plagiarizes/scrapes it for AI/demands updates rudely/reads it on a monetized youtube channel/binds it and sells it for profit?
The other idea I've been coming up against is almost the opposite of this--that because some readers form attachments to fic, deleting that fic (or even archive-locking it!) is actively harming those readers. Sure, they can't be bothered to hit the download button or get an AO3 account, but that's no reason not to think of these strangers first before doing what I want with my creative output.
Yall, life is ephemeral. There are things we will see and enjoy and never find again for one reason or another, and it's not harm being done to us, it's just the nature of existence. Having an emotional reaction to something does not give you any sort of ownership over that thing. Artists are allowed to change their minds about whether they want that art in the wild, particularly given that it's free. Maybe it's because I utilize the library a lot, but reading a book and then losing access to that book is not a crime against you, it's just a normal thing that happens. If you read something and it means that much to you, there are ways to avoid losing it (download it).
Seeing this particular attitude extend out to "not making your fic available for as many people to read as possible is harming them" is beyond bizarre. If I woke up tomorrow and deleted everything I have ever written, there would still be thousands upon thousands upon thousands of beautiful, emotional, meaningful fics out there for people to read. They would lack for nothing. Would some people be upset? Probably. Would I be hurting them? No, not really.
Sometimes people have negative emotions because of our actions, but that doesn't mean we did anything to them. This is one of those times.
Lastly, this AI and everything else bullshit really has taken a toll on my enthusiasm for posting my work. It's one thing for companies to try to pillage every thought, every word, every stroke of a pen or paintbrush to enrich themselves while actively making the planet an unbearable and inhospitable place to live, it's another when fellow fans are telling you that "Whelp that's just life, what did you expect, give us your content anyway or you're a bad person and if you complain, then I'll be taking my business elsewhere, you sensitive, entitled creative, lol."
#because here's the thing#it just stops being fun#and fun is the reason I (and hopefully all of us) started writing in the first place#if I wanted to cater to people whose tastes aren't mine#I would be trying to woo the taylor swift fans who control the publishing industry#and don't get me wrong the people on AO3 who interact with my stuff rule#Particularly patrochilles fans like that group of people has given me the best writing experience of anyone#and I don't want to let some idiotic exchanges ruin the joy I get from writing#but it feels like it's coming from all sides this year#I do think everyone would benefit if we all remembered that author-reader interactions are just two strangers attempting to communicate#sometimes good sometimes awkward sometimes wires get crossed sometimes cultures clash most often it's just small talk
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Fan Fic Writer Interview
I’ve wanted to do this ever since I saw it on @hollow-lime-green’s blog but I have my phone set up so that I can only be on social media for 5 minutes at a time and it is hard to do something like this 5 minutes at a time so I’ll probably be chipping away at it for another couple of months lol
How many works do you have on AO3?
17! But I think there’s one that I orphaned when I myself was 17 so I guess technically 18.
Your top 5 stories by kudos:
1) Fuckery - JJK, Satosugu, 14.3K which is insane now that I look at it, Rated E
This fic is the bane of my existence istg (lh). I wrote it on a dare from my irl friends, slapped it out in like a month and a half and it became my most popular fic by far within less than a week. Sex sells ig.
Seriously though, there are some parts of it that I am genuinely proud of and even if my repressed ass wants to die of embarrassment and Catholic guilt every time I think about it I do think it’s a good fic. There may or may not even be a sequel in the works who knows.
2) Glycerin - BNHA, Kiribaku, Rated M, 130K
My baby. My pride and joy. The fic I always keep coming back to. I’ve been writing this fic since I was 16 and genuinely it has been one of the most valuable experiences of my life. It’s still holding on by a thread as my most popular hits wise (damn you Fuckery), but it definitely has the most dedicated and supportive readership of anything I’ve written. Even if it’s not #1 in my kudos it will always be #1 in my heart.
3) hug me, love me, protect me - BNHA, Krbk, Rated T, ~8K
Kind of a sleeper agent tbh. I wrote it for a Christmas exchange and it was kinda out of my comfort zone cause I never write AU stuff but I think it turned out pretty cute! (Though very goofy)
4) Please Just Give Me One Last Kiss - BNHA, Krbk, Rated M, 5K
It’s angsty, it’s cheesy, what more could you want. I should reread it tbh
5) Something In Between - BNHA, Krbk, Rated G, 6.9K
Another fic that is super important to me. Straight up this fic and the zine it was a part of may very well have changed the course of my life (got me to break up with my girlfriend/childhood best friend of 11 years). I still get comments from aromantic people saying that it’s so nice to have a fic that makes them feel seen and even though my sexuality is once again massively up in the air it’s definitely one of the fics that I’ve poured the most of myself into.
Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I try to! Though admittedly I’ve been lacking recently 😬
Comments are always such a big motivator for me and I think that 1) it encourages people to keep commenting and 2) since they’ve taken the time to comment it’s nice to take the time to thank them. I should really get caught up on my comments lmao
What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
Uhhhhh probably either The Thing He Wants or What kind of gift? though tbh I don’t even know if I would count those as full on fics cause they’re both less than 1000 words and were more just ideas that I posted on Twitter and decided to cross post onto ao3 cause why not. I don’t really do full fics with angst endings. I’m a happy endings only kind of person
What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?
It hasn’t happened yet but Glycerin is gonna have such a happy ending I promise. I actually wrote the epilogue several years ago and sometimes when my motivation is low I go back and read it cause I’m like after all the shit I’ve put him through I need Kat to get to that point.
Insofar as happy endings that have already been published, probably either Please Just Give Me One Last Kiss or Something In Between
Do you write crossovers?
Nope
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
Nope again
Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Well as previously mentioned I tend to be a bit repressed so for a long time I didn’t, but I’ve started to a little bit within the past year thanks to the previously mentioned dare and Ykw it’s pretty fun I can’t lie. It’s nice to get out of my comfort zone a lot a little bit and according to my comments I’m pretty good at it so that’s always fun. So far my smut has been exclusive to Satosugu for the simple reason that it’s one of the few ships I have where I genuinely think the characters are attractive
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of
Have you ever had a fic translated?
Not yet, but oh man that would be the biggest compliment ever.
What’s your all-time favorite ship?
Oof this one is hard. The one I’ve loved for the longest is definitely Sokeefe, but that series is so genuinely bad idk if I can in good conscience call it my all time favorite. Maybe it would be if the characters didn’t still have the personalities of badly written 11 year olds.
Im gonna say my OTP is probably Kiribaku cause I just love how caring and supportive they are of each other while also being very goofy and fun but with plenty of angst potential too, but that being said Satosugu has absolutely consumed me for the past year and a half and I don’t see that disappearing any time soon
What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
Hands Like Mine, Heart Like His (BNHA, Krbk, Rated G, 8.8K)
It’s a really sweet story but it’s another one that I planned to be long and I’m such a slow writer that I had to choose one long fic to focus on and Glycerin is way too important to me to give up. I still day dream about Hand and Hearts though so maybe someday I’ll add another chapter or two
What are your writing weaknesses?
Speed for sure. I am so abysmally slow it’s awful. The absolute best I can do is maybe 500 words in an hour and that is super rare, like genuinely maybe once or twice a year rare, which especially sucks cause I like writing super long stuff that ends up taking me literal years. I have such an insane amount of respect for writers who can consistently get chapters out every couple of weeks or even days.
What are your writing strengths?
One common thing I get complimented on a lot is making my characters feel human/well rounded which makes me really happy.
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I think it’s super fun! Unfortunately I only speak English and a little bit of Spanish so I don’t do it often, but I do have a chapter of Two Weeks where a majority of the dialogue is in Spanish and it was a really fun challenge (though idk how accurate the translation is lol). If the POV character speaks the language then usually I’ll provide a translation, but if they don’t I think it’s fun to just have it as is and either have the reader experience the confusion along with the POV character or try to write it in a way where the reader and character can both kind of understand what’s going on even without knowing what’s being said.
What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?
Beiguang, CaitVi, GELPHIE. Basically any F/F ship because I am unfortunately cursed with being completely unable to write Sapphic ships despite the fact that I myself am a woman who has exclusively dated other women. I’m hoping Gelphie will save me though. Please.
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
Glycerin and Something In Between are definitely the ones that are the most important to me, but I’ve already talked about those so honerable mention goes to In The Garden (JJK, Stsg, Rated G, 2.8K). It’s definitely short and sweet but idk I just think the writing is really good and I’m so proud of how the formatting in that one scene turned out. It genuinely was like a month of me brainstorming ways of visually portraying what I wanted to portray and I think it turned out really well!
Okay wow I actually managed to finish this within the day! (Though it did take me all day). I don’t really have anyone to @ since all in all I’m still relatively new to tumblr so I’ll just do what Hana did and say anyone who wants to go for it!
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Fic Ask Game: Favorite Fic Lines
Hello people. So, I got some sudden inspiration for this little game, which goes hand in hand with the KinnPorsche Fanfic Comment Event a little bit, in my opinion: Share the lines of fics that have brought a big emotional reaction out of you. It can be anything, from sadness to happiness to horniness to anything in between. Lines that have stayed with you, no matter how long ago you read the fic. I believe our writers deserve a little praise in these trying times, don't you think? So, for me, some of them are the following: 1) "The rib hurts so much more now that someone else knows about it." - drank every scar, by @ginnymoonbeam - Tbh, I'd have to put the whole fic in here, but this is the line I tend to think of whenever the fic comes to mind. Rereading it now to find the line made my eyes water, it's so fucking visceral and perfect and I love it so much. Once again, thank you so, SO much for writing it and sharing it with the world ❤️ 2) "Vegas’ violence is unpredictable, painfully personal, and utterly, tragically ineffectual.
Pete forgives him all of it." - Civil Hands, by @ameliarating - I can't count the times I went feral over both Civil Hands and Deep Dive. As a fan of Pete, both of those fics mean the world to me, and this specific line has been on my mind since the moment I read it. I love how it showcases Vegas' effect on Pete's worldview, how Vegas made him break his own rules, and how he came to accept it, because it's him. Incredible writing, I love it so fucking much❤️ 3) "He’d rather be marked as disposable, he’d realized, than erased as invisible.
There was something bitter about realizing that he’d been both." - Once You Are Real, by @veliseraptor - Lise chose this for the summary and it's such a perfect choice. I think it's the reason I chose to read the fic in the first place. I am very emotional when it comes to the concept of Pete finding out he was forgotten, and this fic does an amazing job with it. I keep returning to it a lot, I love it to death. Painful in it's brilliance, I can't recommend it enough. 4) "“I don’t know,” Pete said unsteadily. “I don’t know. How could I know what that feels like? I’m not that kind of person.” He pulled against Vegas’s grip, and got nowhere. “You make my teeth ache. You make the world bright, like it’s real. It hurts. It’s hurt since I met you, but that means I can never forget I’m alive." - even the clearest water, by @luckydicekirby What a fic. The concept, the lines, the execution, it all deserves praise until the end of time. Pete's answer to Vegas' "Do you love me?" will always remain in my head as one of the best things VP-related I've ever read and ever will read in my life. I loved this so fucking much, I will never get over it ❤️ 5) "“And now you have nothing,” Kinn says. “As I said, a dumb move.”
“Wrong again,” Vegas says. “I now have something you don’t.”
“Oh?” Kinn doesn’t hide the way he rolls his eyes. “Massive hospital bills? Bed sores?”
“Happiness.”" - Your Power Over Me, by @wisteria-daydreamer - A very special shout out to my lovely friend who's written one of my favorite Kinn&Vegas fics I've ever had the pleasure to read. When this line came, I literally gasped out loud, it left me speechless. The way Kinn's POV is written was marvelous and the whole conversation he had with Vegas was incredible. Check it out if you crave some good Kinn&Vegas fics, it's very, very good. Disclaimer: I have so many fics and authors I love and I've made that clear to both them and my followers in the past. My brain could only handle doing 5 for this, but I absolutely have more than 5 that I'm obsessed with. Maybe one day I'll do a Part 2, I'll see how it goes in the future. No pressure tagging all the following lovely people, besides the writers that have already been tagged: @wretchedamaranth, @xpi-x-elx, @fleet-off, @lu-sn, @suzteel, @tsttoain, @thisautistic, @theoldastronomer, @vegaseatsass, @adanima, @kissporsche, @raksh-writes, @nyxelestia, @yourknightofrage, @mightymightygnomepriest, @justanothervariant, @justfionn and anyone else who wants to share the love for their fave fics and authors. You can do 5 or 10 or 100, there's no limit at all ❤️❤️
#Idk how this even came to mind but I love spreading appreciation for the people who have given me so many feels so here we go#No reason necessary tbh#I can't wait to see what people will share <33#ask game#fanfic
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Dappling Gothic Horror AU
Because there are a surprising amount of people into EAH and the game Touchstarved, my brain started cooking up a gothic horror au based off the latter’s setting. And tbh, since that game is still just a demo, some inspiration might bleed in from stuff like Bloodborne. Although, I’ve only watched some gameplay and listened to video essays so it’d be very surface level inspo. Idk we’ll see where this goes after chapter one.
Here’s what I got so far:
The world of Ever After has fallen into chaos after a failed rebellion led by the Evil Queen
There was a destiny system in place, just without the school. It was meant to regulate the flow of magic after its discovery several centuries earlier.
Said system was created by a blood pact between the original fairytale protagonists. The villains were rounded up one by one and forced to join.
After the war with the Evil Queen, bloodthirsty creatures began to roam the land. They seem to come from a mysterious fog that emerged during the final battle.
The Evil Queen is blamed, but no one has seen her in years. Some say she was consumed by the fog alongside her family.
The various kingdoms are city states who maintain an admittedly tense alliance with one another. Each one has built itself massive walls and continues to strictly regulate magic.
Apple is the heir to the largest among them , but she’s mostly lived a sheltered life in the palace and its surrounding wealthy neighborhoods.
Attempting to get a better understanding of her kingdom, she sneaks out one day.
She accidentally ends up outside the city walls and is nearly killed by monsters when someone in armor saves her.
She thinks it’s the kingdom knights but she passes out before she can thank them.
Apple wakes up, healed of her wounds, but suspicious of her surroundings because she’s clearly not in a kingdom sanctioned hospital or clinic.
Raven walks in and introduces herself as the healer who helped her, and just as Apple is about to interrogate her, Darling comes in and reveals herself as the person who saved her.
Apple soon finds out that they’re part of a gang. She freaks out and runs off the next time she’s alone.
She contemplates telling the knights about what happened, but feels conflicted about the kindness shown to her by a pair that her mother would call criminals. She opts to stay quiet, but doesn’t stop thinking about Darling
Apple eventually decides to seek her out to propose an arrangement. A high paying position as one of her personal guards in exchange for Darling’s unfiltered knowledge of the kingdom.
That’s it for now. I have more outlined for Darling and Raven’s backstories, as well as Snow White’s role, but that’d spoil things. I’m also thinking about adding old letter fragments from the Evil Queen because I’m obsessed with her letter that was included with the SDCC Raven doll. Till then, I shall keep plotting and trying to write this first chapter!
#dappling#darling charming#apple white#raven queen#ever after high#eah#ever after high fanfic#ever after high au
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yo. wsp. sooooo i been writing some thoughts lately and i need help with something
HOW THE FUCK DO I WRITE GOOD SMUT? like i tried once and it was fucking BAD lollll. i seriously need help and you're the only person i can actually ask because you. are literally. the best at that. so pleassse send help
bb i love you and you are a sweet little raspberry pastry. i am so flattered to be asked something like this. i don’t know if i am the best but i do think any success i have is from learning from the best! im not great with advice but here are some things i believe have helped me.
the most important thing i can tell you is this: WRITE “BAD” SMUT! who cares? no-one has to see it?? write bad smut, and then write more bad smut, then go back and reread your og bad smut and decide what you would change so you enjoy reading it just a little bit more. then write some more bad smut. the first time you ever wrote a sentence, was it an ivory tower example of academically flawless grammar, punctuation, and spelling? was it an evocative and award-winning piece of revelatory poetry inspiring massive social change on a global scale? no way. you probably didn’t even have all your letters facing the right direction. WRITE BAD SMUT OR YOU’LL NEVER WRITE GOOD SMUT.
also write bad smut because it’s fun honestly and who cares how good it is?
next most important piece of advice: i think you gotta start by asking yourself what you like best when you’re reading smut. nono wait back up. first you gotta read A LOT of smut. no, more. however much you’re thinking, probably more. then you gotta figure out what your favorite parts are and why.
now. on a more individual note. every author’s smut is different and personal because everything author’s writing is different and personal and smut is in some ways even more personal, right? (don’t stop making plums) so what you’re writing will always look different. but here are some things that have worked for me and maybe they can provide a good space for you to start exploring how you want your smut to look. (warning for late-night first-draft rambling ahead)
for me, there are two parts to what makes smut satisfying (again, this is personal preference).
the first is when the smut is very rooted in an emotional core — specifically, the characters and their motivations. what does each character want? if it’s only an orgasm, why is it only an orgasm? if it’s more than an orgasm, what is it and why? and what does that look like?
sunshine-reader in sunshine wants a playful one-night stand but is incapable of not offering warmth. rocket in the same narrative wants connection because he’s rocket and never feels connected enough. their connection is warm and open because (they think) it’s low-risk and short-lived.
pearl-reader in wyndham/cicatrix wants to exercise autonomy for once in her damn life. rocket/“the monster” in wyndham/cicatrix wants revenge-sex. both of these two are grappling with their own versions of grief and that shows through in their motivations too (at least id like to think so).
in window, sex between jo and rocket looks different when it’s their first time versus when rocket’s trying to coerce her into taking up more space versus when jo is spiraling as they head back to terra, because the goals and motivations are always different.
knowing your characters’ motivations for sex, the way they’re trying to communicate with each other, and their outside-the-bedroom neuroses can also help make sense of kinks, too. in my imagination, rocket always has control issues (especially mcu rocket tbh) because of his historical lack of control and what it means for him to be under someone else’s power. (but i also see him with a complicated/conflicted praise kink a la adorations because he wants to believe nice things about himself while also not believing them, or not believing compliments are genuine).
all of the above is the philosophical part of smut — the emotional core that makes smut more satisfying for me personally as a reader. after that, we get into the technical writing-shit. i think, much like actual sex, the pay-off is better if you savor the journey. so at least for me, that means writing beyond just pinched nips, grinding, penetration. it means taking time to explore the way it feels to be touched in even the mundane parts of our bodies: different textures, pressures, etc.
for example, a claw prickling over the inner flesh of the forearm is not explicitly sexual but. i mean. ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ or is it. you know?
another thing for me is to focus on detail. when our senses are overwhelmed we tend to focus on very specific details: the light coming through the window, the stroke of the back of the knuckles on your shoulder, the scent of the pillow. you could say “then she reached orgasm” or you could say “she squeezed her eyes tight. the crackle of electricity in her abdomen snapped taut, and then broke apart in a shower of sparks.” you could say someone was spanked, or you could say there was a crack in the air, and a stinging heat bloomed on their asscheek. don’t just say what happened — say what it felt like, what it looked like, what it smelled and sounded and tasted like. (i mean sometimes you gotta just say what happened or the scene can get too dense…but overall, i opt for relying on sensory description over exposition).
the rest imo is window dressing. are there certain phrases or words you particularly like to read or hear? are you someone who loves or hates the word “pussy” or “dick”? would you rather avoid explicit terms all together, or use them often? or sporadically, for impact?
anyway. like i said these are just my initial late-night first-draft thoughts so they might be rough and they ARE just things that have helped ME (everyone has different thoughts/ideas on this!) but i hope maybe this is a helpful place to start??? also if any of this did not make sense i apologize i am sleepy just lmk and i am happy to expand/clarify
also you are a precious little cherry tart, a springtime crocus, and i love you. please write more smut and allow yourself the freedom of enjoying it. ♡♡♡
#rfh writing advice#rfh asks#rfh smut#make plums#people need plums#just writer stuff#just fanfiction things
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What are your unpopular opinions on any/all of the BAU women?
(i saw the word unpopular after so i jus gave general opinions shdgsdjdsdk sorry but some of it is prolly unpopular anyway)
jennifer jareau is the apple of my mothafuckin eye fr. the literal love of my life. i am so serious when i say every blonde woman that i have ever found attractive needs to bow down before her (n samantha stephens) n kiss the mothafuckin ring. she is so slept on n i feel like people don't really understand or appreciate the many layers of her. i feel like she's so widely misunderstood. tbh people's takes on her tend to make my eye twitch real bad. as beautiful as she is, i feel like "soft", beautiful looks contribute a lot to her massive mischaracterization. except rosie's; she understands jj, she gets it. but for the most part, i dont feel like people should b allowed to speak on her bcus they're prolly wrong. (also butch jj is the best hc ever, but we all know i feel that way)
i really love emily prentiss, i do. she's intelligent, soulful, goofy in a way that doesn't feel ridiculous or stupid (contrary to a lot of fanon portrayal) but i mostly feel like that about early seasons emily. the more she left n returned, the less it seemed like the writing for her character was true to her n it started to feel bland. i often ask myself in later seasons where her personality went bcus at a some point she jus feels kinda blank n like shes there for fan service. it isn't emily's fault tho; it's all the writers. i love emily tho. also i hc her as bisexual now bcus idk i feel like u would have to swing from multiple vines to participate in sin to win; i can see her being w women n men equally as far as sex goes but being more likely to fall in love w women but sometimes she'll fall in love w a man n b like, well shit... ok n rockin w it but yes, shes a bi babe. i have also concluded that homegirl has a type n jj would b the exception to her rule/type bcus emily is def robert deniro (iyyk). anyway....
no one is allowed to hate elle greenaway, alright? as much as i do love gideon, everything that went wrong elle is his n hotch's fault n i mean that wholeheartedly. anyway, she was a cool as a fan w ice in it, bruh. i b missing her so much. also, i was proud of her when she shot that serial rapist; he was never gon stop offending. she did the right thing.
jordan todd was such a sweet, sensitive baby but she was functional n driven n i like that. she's also flirty. i like that too. idk man. i loved her so much, and ya know, i really loved her for really highlighting all the work jj does and reminding them all to like really appreciate her. she was a great temp; i hope she's happy somewhere. also i will never not scream about this but HER AND EMILY PRENTISS GOT NASTY n i would like to see it (:
i didn't enjoy ashley seaver or her arc. contrary to popular belief, it isn't bcus she replaced jj. it's bcus shes the only team member they've ever had that was there without any actual professional merit. girl wasnt even finished w the academy, and i, for one, did not enjoy watching what was essentially an internship. also she was boring so.
i like penelope garcia a lot; she's fun n she's sweet. i would like to write for her more but i find it difficult bcus she doesn't feel like a real person to me. which is like not to say i haven't met people like her bcus i have but whenever i do, it's kinda jarring n i always feel like i jus hallucinated. also my view of emotions is... yeah. so, there are times where she's kinda paralyzed w emotions that grind me a bit bcus idk i kinda feel like if ur emotions aren't servicing u in that moment then u needa jus suck it up n deal w them later, u not getting nowhere if u crying to much to function n then u still have this problem; so suck it up n deal w the problem n cry later n she has to b reminded of that often which again grinds me a bit but thats a me thing. i dont hold that against PG but it's jus sumn that we are not compatible on n that's fine. also i love love love love love love her n her dynamic w morgan ofc but some of the nicknames she calls him makes me personally uncomfortable as a black person but i mean hey... also, evolution was a disgusting disservice to her character n she deserves to b happy n at peace w her life away from the bau; she coulda came back without getting sucked back into a job that was messing her up mentally. she deserves better
i don't really have an opinion of kate callahan. i don't like her. i don't dislike her. i simply did not connect to her at all; also s10 wasn't a strong season fr so that ain't even really her fault. i do like that scene w her n my jocks on the plane tho. i like jennifer love hewitt tho (maddie buckley is that bitch fr). she b cool in stuff.
alex blake, my beloved fr; she calms me. i love that. i really really really loved her on the team; i loved how that version of the team functioned so much. it's one of, if not my favorite version of the team. she is the best (later seasons) replacement character hands down. god, i loved everything about her. literally everything about her. i fr don't have any notes, 11/10 fr. i miss her terribly. i would also let her do unspeakable things to my body so long as she talks me thru it n i know she would. anyway, i hope she's happy teaching n living her life <3
okay don't jump me but like the v worst thing any show could do to me w any character is introduce them w terrible hair. it's shallow as fuck, i will admit that but if that's how i first meet them? baby! i will never get over it, i will never unsee it n it will impact my ability to consume that character moving forward. that to say n i do hate to say it but tara lewis is a character who has fallen victim to this. they shoulda never introduced her in that fuckass wig. it pisses me off jus thinkin about it n she was in it for a while so as shallow n terrible as it is, it affected my connection to her. but it is what it is, im not apologizing for it. also, she has the horrific misfortune of being introduced in the late late late seasons when for the most part they wasn't even trying in the writers room fr, which sucks. bcus im gonna b particularly honest here, i dont feel a thing for her or luke. i like matt bcus i watched beyond borders n bcus i mentally connect him to jj as her male tethered. i also, so sorry, don't care that she's queer; i don't like how that whole thing was written. it didn't do shit for me at all. really, in conclusion, tara lewis is a victim to criminal minds writing team n costume department. so justice for tara!! but no yea she not my homie or nothin like that; i don't hate her tho.
#ro's asks#jennifer jj jareau#emily prentiss#elle greenaway#jordan todd#ashley seaver#alex blake#kate callahan#tara lewis#penelope garcia
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hi moottt how was ur day?
i have some bookish questions for u bc why not
-what is ur favourite genre of literature?
-what are your top 5 favourite books?
-what are your top 3 favourite authors?
-do you have a favourite book character? if so, who are they? (feel free to list more than one)
-what is your favourite romance trope?
-what do you like to see in a main character?
-what are your thoughts on queer literature?
-what is a bookish pet peeve you have?
-do you like to purchase books, borrow them, or read them online?
-do you often read books translated from other countries?
thats all for now :) have a nice day
hello! i’m doing okay in the middle of moving tho so stressful haha
help did i never answer this? i’m sorry i’m actually tumblr illiterate like crazy
My fav genre is probably hm… def fiction haha young adult and contemporary…? it said those were genres i’m so sorry i don’t know the names of them and i’m an anxious mess! but if it’s got gay people and mental illness i’ll take it. i like dystopian as well!
top five NOT IN ORDER LOL
-girl in pieces by kathleen glasgow
-solitaire by alice oseman
-radio silence by alice oseman
-the perks of being a wallflower by soeben chbosky
-blood of olympus by rick riordan
(they change all the time haha)
-for authors i would def say
-rick riordan
-alice oseman (obv)
-and hm i haven’t read more than one of glasgows books so possibly suzzanne collins maybe? AUGHH IM SO INDECISIVE! (i do have fav fanfic authors tho haha)
NICO DI ANGELO THE SON OF HADES AND WILL SOLACE THE SON OF APOLLO THEYRE FROM RICK RIORDANS GREEK DEMIGODS SERIES(S) AND I LOVE THEM SO MUCH THEYRE MY SPECIAL INTETEST THEIR COOL AS FUCK AND HE IS SO ME I AM SO THEM THEYRE MY EVERYTHING AND I LOVE THEM MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF (wait that’s not a good comparison uhh) I LOVE THEM MORE THEN FOOD ITSELF 🗣️
as someone who is demiromantic i’ve got to say friends to lovers since nothing else makes sense in my mind haha other then that hurt/comfort and just being domestic are UGH love it! SUNSHINE X GRUMPY as well. I eat it up everytime.
i love when main characters are similar to me so mentally ill gay very sad etc etc lol but besides that i would say complex? i hate it when authors make “i’m so happy all the time” characters the main character like i need DEPTH where’s the FLAVOR. so i suppose just not being perfect?
there needs to be more of it lol. i’m loving how much of it is being made to day but tbh in my opinion some authors do it wrong… i love when being queer is a major part of a characters personality because well they’re proud! but it’s when an author makes the entire character based off of that with no other personality traits. sexualizing queer relationships too like…. yikes! would love to see some more aroace and genderqueer rep that isn’t just boy/nb/girl tho!
when endings are rushed! it’s terrible i remember i loved this one book when i was younger that had the og “i’m nothing like y’all” as the cover haha. i forget what it was called sorry! but there was a great story and then it ended with her friends saying “sorry for excluding you and they went on to win the state math fair!” what. YOU JUST HAD A FULLY FLESHED OUT STORY AND YOU DID THAT??? i’m sure nobody likes them but they especially piss me off. skipping over important scenes as well and just showing the aftermath! non floppy books. FIX ITTTTT. also tbh smut? i mean i don’t mind it but that’s what ao3 is for i’m fine with the smut where they don’t show it like in charlie and nicks first time in heartstopper where it’s just kinda vague but as soon as i see a dick beint described im OUT. and books that just are smut like dude there’s so many better things you could be writing about!
ngl i am a massive book purchaser. i used to get them all from the library but thennn i got a bookshelf and discovered what annotating is… i just love being able to go back on what i’ve read whenever i want! and the covers are pretty :)
no actually! i don’t think i ever have tbh? i think the only time that happened was when i translated an official nico di angelo short story from italian haha
thank you if you listened to my yap! also i’m so sorry i didn’t see this :( also if i already responded to this and i forgot you can just kill me please and thank you. also have a good day too so sorry i didn’t see this! :(
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I didn't expect the Thane post, i even forgot my og ask, but by chance, I saw it scrolling through my homefeed (which i dont often check bc im not super active on tumblr) and omfggg, the scream I scrumpt. What a happy suprise! We Thanemancers got fed GOOD. Thank you. My heart feels healed. Now, I will need to invest in creating a time machine, clone you, and send your clone back in time to work on me3. Perhaps make a whole army of clones to make each clone work on the writing for every romance. The Kolyat inclusion is peak. Thank you for not forgetting Kolyat, he really is so inportant to Thane. Geniunly made my entire week. I want to print your post out and chew on it everyday. Thank you!
🫡
I felt bad for taking so long because the chances of the original requester actually seeing the finished fic got more and more slim by the day.
And by some twist of fate you actually end up seeing it!! Even though I only started being active again a couple days ago?? Even though you rarely open tumblr??? The fact it was on your homepage rather than you specifically looking for stuff on the Thane x Reader tag???
I'm beyond happy <333
Most of all, I'm really glad you liked it! That fic might not have been the most intricate vocabulary wise, but god, it drained me creativity wise, having to come up with scene after scene, second doubting myself, erasing and rewriting.
I will never underestimate storyboard writers and script makers after this. It felt like a world champion boxing match where I only managed to win by an inch. Damn that story got hands.
I had to scrab the whole Party and Identity Theft II mission stages because words wouldn't register in my brain anymore. Maybe in the future I'll go back and add them, but for now I'm clinging to my beloved short drabbles.
Then there was this whole letting it rot in my draft for months out of petty bc I thought no one was reading my stuff either way, what's the point in posting it– I got upset at the idea I spent so much effort on one story only for it to possibly end up never read by a single person.
I tried not to gloss over Thane's condition or his impending doom. I didn't want it to be a full escapism–which is ironically my ideal style–but a proper sweet goodbye, a final dance, the chance to experience life by his side a little bit more, a small extension on the deadline before the curtains fall.
And I wanted Kolyat to share the spotlight as well, he deserved so much more. Shepard was there during the confrontation, aware of it or not, you were a turning point in his life as much as his father finally stepping up to take full responsibility for his past actions.
Kolyat and Grunt being best friends came out of nowhere tbh, at that point the characters had a mind of their own. And it hit me, Kolyat grew in the hanar world, it's mostly oceans, he must have gone to swim a lot, he definitely knows about the aquatic life.
What if I give him an interest in marine biology? What if that's what he's persuing in his study in uni, hanar granted him a fully paid scholarship—another bittersweet benefit he got handed in exchange for the ruthless job his father took—while working a part-time job himself, living in a modest apartment and leading an independent life.
But Kolyat is a loner. He has no friends, no significant other, or even pets. Which causes Thane great concern, Drell society values finding a parter a lot. Maybe that's why Thane moved into his apartment to help make him feel less lonely and subtly push him into making friends. Blaming himself for Kolyat's antisocial nature.
So, with Grunt being very fascinated by sharks, a massive extrovert, a natural leader personality, zero hesitation to speak his mind and aim for what he wants. He makes the ideal friend for Kolyat!
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The wedding imagery and symbolism in the casino stage are my absolute favourite details. Part of it was because I saw a mod for "wedding dresses" back when I was playing ME2 for the first time, scrolling through the mods page for a nice looking dress to use in the casino mission.
Writing Thane's distraction lines was fun ngl. One scrapped line was about him walking up to a human security guard, mentioning how he's actually dating a human and wanted to get some advice on how to woo you and act, what do humans consider romantic?
But then I remembered Garrus has a similar line, just a little more sexual and I didn't want there to be repetition.
Thane didn't seem like the type to hit on the security guards like other characters, even as mere pretend. He's too devoted to his partner for that. Half of his lines were genuine, wanting to hear about the human's family back on earth as a way to help them vent.
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Lastly, you're so kind <3 Thank you so much for your sweet words fosjofjskfks It made me so happy to receive this. I never expected it, which made it just more sweeter.
100% on board with the whole cloning thing, it should've been me on that ME3 writing board! I would've given Cerberus justice I swear! I would've kept Thane alive by the sheer power of love...maybe some prothean magic too.
Like you receive an email for him stating his concern for Kolyat getting into trouble again, he's been coming home more and more late each night. He asks you to investigate, you oblige.
First stage is following his son through the Citadel stealth style, exactly like Thane Loyalty mission in ME2. But it's much shorter and ends once you see Kolyat board an unmarked spaceship.
You follow him, ofc, try to confront him. He's surprised by your presence but then expresses relief rather than acting what you'd expect from someone caught red-handed.
He explains he read in an asari research paper about a prothean technology that could possibly help repair damaged organs, or at least prevent them from degrading even further. But the research has been abandoned since the war and developing biotics took priority.
Kolyat informs you that he's been investigating and managed to get a copy of the whole unedited first draft of the published paper. Some scrapped information in it were apparently the theorised location of the prothean artifact.
He's going there to retrieve it, with or without your help...but he'd be very thankful if you came. He doesn't know how to uh...hold a gun you see, some skills don't pass down in genetics.
You can agree - Thane lives, Kolyat lives
Both of you go there and you can pick only one other teamate. Kolyat is a bit of liability, but bringing him along opens shortcuts and grants you so much lore about him, his late mother, and Thane's past self. It is Kolyat's loyalty mission in a way. You gain the hanar Marine biology branch as a war assest afterwards. You Gain Thane as a new recruit.
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You agree, but demand he doesn't come along - Thane lives, Kolyat dies.
He went behind your back and boarded a different shuttle, without the Normandy abilities...the ship barely makes it into the atmosphere before the prothean technology defences shoots it down.
Thane is very visibly depressed and apathetic for the rest of the game. You gain Thane as new recruit.
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You refuse and demand he hands you the papers - Thane dies early, Kolyat lives
Plays out the same in canon. You gain Prothean research papers as a war asset.
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You refuse - Thane dies early, Kolyat dies
Same as canon but no funeral this time since Kolyat isn't alive to make preparations. You don't gain anything.
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I imagine the mission to be your run of the million clearing out a base, etc. Maybe throwing in some stray collectors who were hiding their for old times sake? Bringing Javik and Lara gives unique dialogue, but you can't bring both unless you sacrifice Kolyat.
Bringing Javik informs you early that this technology isn't a miracle maker and doesn't magically fix organs. It simply delays the inevitable a little bit. It grants the sick a short extension on their lifespan, the pain mostly disappears, their health is restored...but it's a mirage. Nothing in reality changes much, placebo is hell of a thing.
However, despite you telling Thane about the placebo, it still takes effect. He makes the most of his time, realising he doesn't want to spend the last of his moments in a hospital bed.
But if you don't bring Javik, then you never discover that fact, which makes the eventual death scene when both of you realise his health is still deteriorating, much more painful.
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Ik you're joking about the munching thing, but if you want to save a copy for yourself or just to keep in your files and reread, then I'm more than okay with that. In fact, I crossposted the fic to AO3, which natively lets you download it in any format.
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Curious about what role (if any?) Rosie would play in helping Ida through her guilt re. what the SS made her witness. Because based on what you and the anons have been chatting about in terms of the SS using it to drive a wedge between the leaders, and how their reactions might actually make Ida question her humanity, I think Rosie would be the best person for that (of course the majors are always supportive and caring but it’s just hard to get past that you know). Also her brother because we all know he’s her biggest supporter.
Asking this because Ida and Smith’s relationship has become so dear to me and it’s absolutely my favourite thing about this series. There’s genuinely something so beautiful about Smith healing the parts of Ida that saw womanhood and femininity as a weakness and worming her way into her heart. But then the way that that all comes to fruition in such a devastating way when they’re shot down? And how despite everything they’re forced to go through together Smith remains so tenacious in her blind and consuming adoration of her? And how Ida’s fear of femininity being used against her is validated? It’s all such great storytelling. And don’t even get me started on how the comments from the SS make her question her humanity and her ability to love. That sort of stuff stays with you, especially postwar. I hope you choose to explore more of their relationship, it has totally captivated me <3
My darling, this was such a beautiful ask. Your language and all the aspects your put so beautifully -I practically forgot mid way through that you were commenting on something that’s actually my writing, you were saying such beautiful, universally lovely things.
Uhem anyways, lemme get a grip.
I am utterly invested in exploring more of this. In camp, maybe a flashback to training or at least references, and then for sure explored postwar. I love Ida and Lu and I think them along with a changed Maureen are life lines for each other and their men. And “their men” are more than just their husbands.
I think you’re right that while the guys are supportive of Ida -she didn’t have a choice, she did the right thing, it’s not about empathy it was a form of torture- none of that fully heals her. It’s validating. Her bother can say a million times that she did the right thing and it’s validating, especially hearing it from someone who went through something similar, but it’s not enough for her I think.
Even seeing Lu prosper in the postwar years only heals that part. It doesn’t reassure Ida herself that she’s not broken inside for enduring that without cracking. And yes, that’s where Rosie would step in.
I think Rosie puts a massive amount of weight on authority. On the responsibilities of hierarchies. On how a position of power like being a colonel isn’t about how many individuals you have control over, but rather how many souls are in your care and will be put to your account for your mistakes or successes. Like, he’s unbendingly strict about that. And while I think he’d be tender with her over this subject, sometimes I think be might take are bit of a stronger method.
Sometimes it’s what she needs and craves, tbh.
I dunno if it would be utterly out of character but I can see him doing something benign or restraining her consensually and asking “can you prevent this?” just to remind her how absurd it is to consider it her fault.
I dunno. Maybe thats fucked. But one thing I do love about Ida and Rosie is that in some ways her makes her feel more feminine and soft than she’s ever felt safe to be before him, and in the other ways he can be an unflinching fellow officer, which she also responds very well to as she associates that tough love with respect for herself.
Does that make sense? Gimme y’all’s thoughts
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Hi hello my friends and super nerds
I would like to write or do something with a Spy x Family + His Dark Materials crossover... aka ‘what if the Forgers had daemons’ scenario. I’m not great at form finding, especially on fictional characters, so I really hope some daemians can help me out .w.
I’m gonna preface this with two things: - I personally believe daemons would react to trauma and stress in bizarre ways. Most of the cast of SxF is severely traumatized so uh there’s some fun I want to do, like Twilight having never settled, Anya’s never taking a ‘real’ animal form etc - I’d ideally like a mix of symbolic and realistic form stuff. I haven’t been in the HDM/daemonism community too much for a good decade now, but I’ve seen some people say they’re different things so uh... I’d like to just blend it
Twilight (Loid + [REDACTED]): Due to the massive trauma early in life, his daemon has never settled. It basically gives him the master of disguise superpower easily, as it’s extremely rare (and bad!) when that happens. Even so, not many people know of it, just some WISE higher-ups like Sylvia, maybe Franky As Twilight, he’s very independent, detached, meticulous, solitary, detail-oriented, with a brain moving a mile a minute. His ‘default’ form would reflect this. As Loid, however, he’d need something more gentle and approachable, that cares deeply for family, but still very intelligent The fun part would be that he doesn’t realize he’s settling slowly by acting as Loid. I’m not sure if he’d really fit exactly what Loid’s persona daemon is, but we know ‘on the inside’ he’s very loyal, manipulative, crazy smart, anxious
Yor: We don’t know exactly what happened to Yor’s parents, but I think it was likely around settling years (onset of puberty). Having to take over an adult role for Yuri, I’d think she settled early and suddenly. She’s also fiercely loyal (even more than Twilight), cares deeply for family, worried about not being normal enough or not being good enough constantly, act first think later, scary when threatened When we first meet her, Yor’s daemon would be sickly, skinny, mottled. But through the story, they’d get healthier
Anya: Since Anya’s a child, she doesn’t have a defined form yet. I do want to note that, since she’s a human experiment, something is still very wrong with her daemon, though. I’m mostly going with that her forms are always mythical animals and chimeras, never a ‘real’ animal, but open to feedback if anyone thinks something different?
Yuri: His is ‘normal’... relatively. He probably also settled early but not weirdly or suddenly. He’s obsessive, overly protective, uses intelligence as power, aggressive, absolutely dedicated, only vulnerable to their loved ones
Franky: Probably the most normal daemon situation in the whole cast tbh. He’s a jokester but very smart and weirdly wise. He’s like the most typical ENTP ever, if you know your MBTI. Social and savvy, but not very charming
Sylvia (Handler): Her daemon would be quiet and stoic with an aggressive side. She’s a mentor and a leader, who deals with the unfortunate ugly situations, so she’s very dedicated and hard working. There’s a softer side to her, but rarely seen. Not as tunnel-vision as Yuri at all, but probably a form in the same vein
Nightfall (Fiona): Super quiet, super dedicated, super antisocial and unemotional. Except that she’s obsessed with Twilight, of course, just that she never shows it ever. I have an idea that her daemon likes to make ‘weirdly aggressive’ moves at Twilight’s, like laying on them, which Twilight is always slightly alarmed by but it’s just Fiona’s very miscommunicated adoration lmao
Donovan: He’s severed. Nobody knows this. They just think his daemon hides in his suit all the time
Damian: Wants to settle asap and tries to take ‘noble’ forms like lions and wolves and eagles, due to pressure
Becky: Is weird and tries to put accessories on her daemon. The forms are always extra pretty animals
Okay so now that I kinda wrote down the jist of the cast... Anyone wanna help me with form finding for them? .w.;;;;;;;;;;
#personal#long post#spy x family#spyxfamily#sxf#hdm#his dark materials#the golden compass#daemonism#pls help me figure out their forms#and if you don't know anything about daemons they're essentially your soul as an animal in a totemic sense
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hi ᡣ𐭩
i’m joey & i’m a trans dude !
tbh this account doesn’t have one singular purpose, i’m part of very many fandoms & i’ll prob post abt most of them :’) it’s also my personal account so, yeah…
⌞i’ll post about daily things (probably, maybe) & i’ll possibly talk about trans things & mental health (i’ll tag it dw) since i have OCD, anxiety, audhd & i’m a system⌝
that being said, i’m an artist & i stopped drawing for a while bc of depression but i’m tryna get back into it & i’m hoping to be able to post art regularly. i don’t really have a specific style yet, i’m still figuring out what my style of art is… but i do really like drawing bodies & doing paper sketches using ballpoint pens of random stuff
i’m also an (amateur) gamer ! i mostly play nintendo icl (splatoon & mario kart usually) but i do play xbox as well & i’m always looking for ppl to play games with bc it can get boring on your own :/
some of my other interests include:
⟡ writing ~ creative writing got me through most of my life & i absolutely love love love writing so much !
⟡ watching tv ~ specifically shows like TMNT, icarly, heartstopper, very many kdramas, some animes, stranger things, only murders in the building, etc. i’m a huge marvel fan too & i’m a total sucker for horror movies & thrillers !
⟡ reading ~ i have so many books but i always go back to that one book i’ve read forty million times. iykyk :’)
⟡ music ~ bring me the horizon, motionless in white, slipknot, twenty one pilots, nothing,nowhere, yungblud, nvthvn, piri, ren, stray kids, twice, itzy, ateez, le serrafim, newjeans, michael jackson, 2mello, bbno$, and more !
⟡ research ~ absolutely adore researching. idc what it’s about. i love to know the how/why/etc. i think this comes from my background in biomedical science?
⟡ other ~ i love going for walks, fashion is a massive love of mine as well, i like cooking a lot too, stargazing, watching reaction videos, and i’m a dancer as well
i hope to make friends here, or at least find people who like the same things as me & hopefully have fun. i’m not new to tumblr but it’s been a long time
see you around ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶
#new account#art#artwork#digital art#sketch#queer art#my art#lgbtqia#transmasc#trans ftm#queer#gay#heartstopper#kdrama#happiness tvn#sweet home#nintendo#splatoon#splat3#inkling#writing#fanfic#writeblr#writer things#bands#bmth#miw#slipknot#moots#art moots
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