#tales from the holodeck

[sshbpodcast]

Tales from the Holodeck: ENT Fanfic: Caitlin’s Story

Celebration! We’ve luckily finished Star Trek: Enterprise here on A Star to Steer Her By, and good riddance. There’s only one thing left to do in our typical style: show the writers how it’s really done by writing up our own fanfic stories and teleplays with carefully selected characters from the series. Will they end up better than most episodes of Enterprise? Low bar, folks.

Let’s start things off with Caitlin’s installment in our “Tales from the Holodeck” fanfic series, featuring some homewrecker lasses and the ship pairing we’ve been asking for since season one of the show! Follow along below and/or listen to the cold reads on this week’s podcast episode (this one starts at 1:41). Ready, Set, Flirt!

[images © Paramount/CBS]

“Bachelor Number Fun”

By Caitlin

Random Main Character Pick(s): Reed, Trip Character Draft Picks: Feezal, Tarah

Malcolm had wanted to get his life together ever since he had met his future self and found he was still utterly alone.

So when Trip had suggested putting together some game shows (like they had in the 20th century), Malcolm leapt at the chance to be a contestant on The Dating Game.

He sat in a chair, dressed in his finest, while behind a screen sat three potential dates. His role was to ask questions to determine who would be his ideal match.

Mayweather was hosting (both because of his charming good looks, and because he frankly got left out of a lot of the ship’s shenanigans), and he introduced the show to the audience - made up of the entire crew.

“Bachelor number one,” said Malcolm (thank goodness they had done away with most gendered language in the 23rd century!). “What would your ideal first date be?”

“I think an intimate evening together, a coffee date at a quiet, dark cafe, followed by a romantic concert… Anything that gives us a chance to learn about each other and appreciate each other in beauty,” came the response.

“Very nice,” Malcolm said appreciatively. “I love that answer… Bachelor number two, same question.”

“Ideally, we’d begin by destroying our enemies, and would then celebrate by roasting meat on an open flame, and feed each other with our bare hands.”

“Certainly an… intriguing first date,” said Malcolm, suddenly very afraid of Bachelor number two. “Bachelor number three, same question.”

“Well,” drawled the third voice. “I’d like to cook my date my favorite meal, fried catfish, mashed potatoes and collard greens. Then, we’d watch a classic film and cuddle up together. Maybe something scary, so I could hold you if you were afraid.”

Malcolm smiled in spite of himself. The voice was charming and friendly, and he knew he could trust that person with his life.

After a few more questions, Malcolm was somewhat embarrassed to ask, “uh, Bachelor number one - we’ve been seeing each other for some time, and things have gotten hot and heavy. What would your ideal first time - uh, making whoopee - be like?”

“Well, the first time we make love, I'd want it to be somewhere quiet and private, so that when we reach our climaxes, We can be free with the pleasure we feel,” purred Bachelor number One. “Oh, and I'd want to make sure there was plenty of seating - my five husbands will want to watch. Maybe even if join, if you're comfortable with that.”

“I’m… not sure about that, but I appreciate your candor,” stammered Malcolm, now completely terrified of Bachelor number One. “Bachelor Number two - same question.”

“After we’ve defeated our enemies, still covered in their cooling blood,” growled Bachelor Number Two. “We throw ourselves onto the floor of an ice cave and ravish each other.”

He was definitely afraid of Bachelor Number Two. “Uh… Bachelor Number Three, same question, please.”

“Well… I don’t know that there’s a one size fits all answer here,” said Bachelor Number Three. “I think when the moment is right, you just know. And then you go where the spirit takes ya.”

“Well, that’s just about all the time we have,” said Mayweather. “Malcolm, who do you choose for your very special date for a private dinner prepared by Chef?”

He didn’t even need a second to consider. “Everyone seems lovely,” he said, diplomatic, “but I have to go with… Bachelor Number Three.”

“Congratulations, Bachelor Number Three!” crowed Mayweather. “Before we bring him out, let’s see who you didn’t choose!”

Bachelor Number One, it turns out, was none other than Feezal, one of Phlox’s many wives (and certainly his most comely, by his own reckoning); Bachelor Number Two was Tarah, an Andorian the Enterprise crew had once encountered when they were teamed up with Shran.

“And now,” said Mayweather, hardly able to suppress a smile, “let’s meet your date!”

And of course, Bachelor Number Three was… Trip. Malcolm felt giddy. It should have always been Trip. He stood, and the two men embraced. 

Maybe now, Malcolm though, the future would be brighter. Maybe now, 20 years from now, he wouldn’t be alone.

-Fin-

—

For more Enterprise fanfic, check out Chris, Ames, and Jake’s stories from this year’s “Tales from the Holodeck”! Be sure to keep listening to new episodes every Thursday on SoundCloud or wherever you podcast, follow us on Facebook and Twitter, and we’ll pick you up at eight for your hot date!

[trekbait]

Must see things on DS9 while on shore leave!

Deep Space 9, simultaneously the most important military outpost in the Alpha Quadrant and the most popular shopping mall this side of Freecloud, has rapidly become a Shore Leave destination to rival Risa. This is your guide to making the most of your leave!

The Promenade

The hub of the station is the Promenade where you can view the station’s many stores. You’ve got gift shops, a tailors to dress up for a night out, the Jumja stick stand, Bat'leth’s R Us and the bowling alley. As far as food or drinks, you’ve travelled around the quadrant in seconds! Choose from Bajoran, Bolian, Klingon, Vulcan, the replimat, and of course Quark’s which we will come back to soon. 

Can’t I just replicate all of this, you ask? Sure but cosplaying ancient capitalism is a hobby so many Federation citizens enjoy these days. Just remember to bring some currency and brush up on the terms you need to “haggle” and “gamble” before you go so you don’t look like an “easy mark” (Have you got advice on how to spend currency? Leave a comment!). If you’re looking for handmade “unreplicated” items, however, get your purchase externally verified before parting with your chosen medium of exchange.

If you’re not someone into aesthetic scarcity, there’s more to do! Opposite Quark’s is the Bajoran temple where you can take in a slice of Bajoran culture. After all, they’ll soon be a Federation member! If your captain has been savvy in scheduling your visit, you may even get a chance to see the Gratitude Festival. Finally, fans of the first Ferengi in Starfleet may want to find a spot opposite Quark’s and dangle their feet over the edge. Enjoy the ambience of Commander Nog’s favourite spot before security moves you along.

Watching the Wormhole

You may be wondering why we didn’t point out the best spot to see the wormhole on the promenade. Well, that’s because the best spot isn’t on the promenade. Every insider knows to head to a vacant upper pylon (our favourite is number 2). Up there you’ll get a beautiful view of what the Bajorans call the “Celestial Temple”. Maybe you’ll have a religious awakening? 

Don’t forget, they say that if you see the wormhole open, you get to make a wish. I guess the dockmaster at DS9 must be a very lucky person by now.

Ops

The nerve centre of DS9 is off duty to casual visitors (such as young ensigns on shore leave) but since the war ended tours have been scheduled twice a day. Visitors will be shown around Ops by a member of the crew and told stories about the events that happened there. You will also get to see inside the station commander’s office including Sisko’s famous baseball. If you’re lucky you’ll catch a glimpse of Colonel Kira! The wait list is very long so book ahead.

Note that holo imagers are not permitted in Ops and the tour may be cancelled at short notice in the event of an emergency situation. For a more in-depth experience, see the “Ops: Battle Stations!” holosuite programme in Quark’s which recreates various dramatic battles from the station’s history.

Quark’s

This isn’t just any Quark’s, it’s the original Quark’s! A bar so good it’s spread across the quadrant like Caitan nip. It’s got drinks, live music, auctions, a Dabo wheel (with some very good-looking Dabo girls and guys to help you part with your currency) and some amazing holosuites (with none of the content filters recently applied to Starfleet Holodecks). This is also the spot where Captain Sisko punched Q!

Those looking for something special should ask after Quark’s private stock. It comes at a premium, but who can turn down some Aldebaran whiskey? Share a glass with Morn who is renowned for regaling fellow patrons with war tales. Meanwhile, Ensigns who have studied under Professor O’Brien at Starfleet Academy might also be looking out for his famous dart board. It’s located just to the left of the bar and you can try it out yourself! See if you can beat O’Brien and Doctor Bashir’s high scores!

Speaking of O’Biren and Bashir, check out Vic’s Lounge in the holosuites. This recreation of an old Earth club was so popular among the crew of DS9 that Bashir kept it running 26 hours a day. The eponymous Vic himself, the proprietor, is a sentient hologram much like Voyager’s EMH. So speak freely and enjoy the vibe of old Earth.

Don’t forget to stop in the gift shop on your way out! 

The Tribble Experience

Something away from the promenade is a Tribble cafe, opened in a cargo bay after the crew of the Defiant brought back the one-extinct Tribble from the 23rd century. Realising they could stop its spread by ensuring they were away from any food supply they managed to relocate the tribbles away from the promenade to a cargo bay. 

Lacking a better idea, they opened an “experience” where you get to pet, play with and roll around a cargo bay with several hundred tribbles. Their cute purrs will calm even the most nervous disposition!

Please note they have a strict no-food policy for all visitors. Anyone inadvertently bringing food into the Tribble Experience will be held legally liable for all the Tribble offspring that result as well as any containment or cleanup costs the station incurs.

Dukat’s Ghost

Several years back, the crew on DS9 triggered a Cardassian self-defense mechanism built into the main computer designed to suppress a Bajoran uprising. While the station locked down and attempted to kill its now Cardassian-free inhabitants messages of the old prefect, Gul Dukat (yes, that Dukat), played on monitors across the station. 

After the program was purged, a bug remained in the system. Head down to level 32, section H. Stand outside the cargo bay there and turn right. Walk to the next junction then left, right then straight on for 12 meters. On your left you’ll see a flickering display screen. At 12 minutes past the hour, every hour, an automated message from Dukat to his Bajoran workers will play. However, the audio generation gets spliced with the general communication system of the station so you’ll get a unique presentation from Dukat. We stayed for 3 hours and heard these;

“Bajoran Workers, I will learn to live with it. Because I can live with it. I can live with it.”

“Bajoran Workers, it is said that in the right hands the Mercury Stone has the power to cleanse the land of evil and bring prosperity to all.”

“Bajoran Workers, come to Quark’s, Quark’s is fun, come right now, don’t walk, run!”

Enjoy your stay on DS9 and remember to leave a review on FourQuad.

[uptoolateart]

Voyage! Tales of the USS Miraculous

Chapter 12 Preview:

Adrien fastened the gold bell onto the front of his catsuit, then looked down at himself, unsure what to think. The soft black leather hugged him from neck to ankle, without a hope of hiding the angles of his body.

At least he could move in it, now putting on what Marinette had explained were arm and leg guards. Bending a little, he put on the boots. Bulky black things with grey toes, shaped to look like large paws. Next came the belt, which doubled as a long tail that draped on the floor behind him. Then the gloves, clawed at the fingertips. And finally, the ears, pinned to a headband. It pinched at his temples, and he adjusted it, fluffing some of his hair over it so it wouldn’t be so obvious.

One thing he’d learned today was it was important to get into the part.

Now, he just needed a mirror.

In the sad absence of this, he approached the holodeck door, drawing in a deep breath for strength before pressing the button on the side. The door eased open, revealing Marinette in the corridor. She turned to him and her jaw dropped.

He shuffled back in. ‘I know. It’s –’

‘Fantastic. Let me get a better look at you.’ Before he knew what was happening, she’d pushed into the holodeck, letting the door shut them in together.

She crossed her arms and walked a slow circle around him, nodding in appraisal. When she stood in front of him again, she looked him right in the face, her gaze so intense that he almost stumbled. ‘The mask brings out your eyes.’

‘It – it does?’

‘Mm. And the ears are a nice touch, if I say so myself. Not to mention the tail.’ She glanced at his ass.

Read at Ao3

[holo-squad]

Holoween Prompts

Only three more days until we begin our week-long Holoween bash! 🎃👻

(For details, see my pinned post!)

Would you like to write something or create some art for the week of ghostly holo-horror tales, but can't quite think of anything that would fit? Here are a few ideas to get your started!

The crew makes a pit stop at some far-flung trading station and Picard acquires an Ancient Artefact of Great Renown and Immeasurable Value (i.e. he's sweet-talked into paying way too much for an old piece of junk). Raffi decides it looks like a Ouija board and holds an impromptu sceance, since it's Halloween and all. Unfortunately, it turns out the artefact is not some harmless piece of junk but a highly sophisticated piece of technology that can mess up all kinds of computer code...

Rios is haunted by ghosts of his past and the holos decide to help him through it.

After a few gruelling months of close calls with hostile ships and diplomatic incidents, Steward digs through a database of ancient Earth customs to find something that might cheer up the crew's spirits. He lands on a tradition called a "Halloween Party", which may or may not end in disaster...

Emil has to patch up various participants of Elnor's "introduction to pumpkin carving (with a guest lecture by Emmet on the advantages and disadvantages of various types of knives)".

It's only been a year since Rios has had this holographic "crew" of his, and their relationship is strained, to say the least. When a computer glitch threatens to turn his Emergency Holograms into hollow, lifeless specters of their former selves, he has to decide how far he is willing to go to save them.

Enoch tries to create a corn maze on the holodeck. Things only get more convoluted from there.

Feel free to use any of these as straight-out prompts or modify them to your heart's content!

And if you don't have the time or spoons to create something new, remember: Holoween is an excellent time to practice a little bit of resurrection! 🕯👻

Simply post a link to a work you have already published or reblog some art and tag me, so I can find it and reblog it!

👻🦇🎃 Let's get ready for a spooky Holoween! 🎃🦇👻

[to-trek-or-not-to-trek]

Hiya, I love your trek stuff.

Would you mind doing a "Data learns about dragons for the first time" bit ? Thank you for your work, I haven't laughed like I did for a good while.

I hope this works:

Data: In an attempt to better understand the human condition, I am attempting to familiarize myself with and analyze traditional folklore. I am most curious as to when humanity hunted the draconic lineage to extinction. Could you explain?

Picard: ... I'm sorry?

Data: Folklore tells of a species of giant winged reptillians, but there is no record of when they went extinct.

Picard: ... Do you mean... dragons?

Riker begins laughing silently in the background.

Data, earnestly: Yes, does their demise exist in humanity's collective memory?

Picard, fighting off a smile: Erm, Data, are you aware that most folk tales are based primarily in fiction?

Data: And also in fact. Many paleontological studies are indicative that such a species could have evolved following the-

Picard, allowing himself to crack a smile: You know, Data, I'm not entirely sure, but, then again, I am not a paleontologist.

Data, oblivious to the crew laughing silently behind him: Then I must consult our Paleontology Officer. *begins to leave*

Pulaski: *Opens her mouth, presumably to burst Data's bubble*

Riker, grabbing her by the arm: Don't you dare!!

~~~

Later, in the holodeck

Geordi: Well, what do you think, Data?

Data, staring at the dragon in front of him: It is a most magnificent and unusual creature, Geordi. However-

*Data is cut off by a stream of fire from the dragon's mouth, which does not harm him but does leave him covered entirely in soot*

*Data blinks several times*

I now understand why these creatures are best left to fiction. And, perhaps, observed from a distance.

[sitp-recs]

Hey liv!! Do you have any recs of fics where there's an imbalanced power dynamic between them or an exploration of that..I guess it is sexual in a way but also not only in that aspect. I just read sth like this and thought it would be an interesting theme between harry and draco. It doesn't need to be a main thing in the plot..Thank you in advance! Kisses 💋

Hi anon! Yes, I’ve read a few fics like that and it can be a fascinating dynamic indeed! Most fics I thought about explore the teacher x student and boss x employee relationships. I hope you enjoy these:

Defined Parameters by Amelior8or (E, 4k)

Harry is a security officer on a ship stuck in the far end of the Delta Quadrant. Malfoy is the Maquis First Officer they tentatively have an alliance with. If they're going to spend the next 70,000 lightyears together, they need to define the parameters of their power. They just so happen to define it on the Holodeck, during a bout of Turkish oil wrestling.

Love, Actually, is All Around by punk_rock_yuppie (T, 10k)

It's Christmastime, and Harry has just started as the new Minister of Magic. It just so happens that Draco works in his office as well, a holdover from Kingsley's tenure. Naturally, love is in the air.

Crutch by AWickedMemory (T, 11k)

Harry has too much to do, and Draco, too little. The solution? Hire him, of course. Who knew Draco Malfoy would be such a perfect personal assistant?

Little Talks by Femme and noeon (E, 11k)

Draco's been shagging the Head Auror for months now, and he's sure it's just a fling. Until Harry asks him to a Quidditch match, that is, and things go horribly wrong.

Rebuilding Draco Malfoy by khasael (E, 11k)

Draco wants to do something to get his life back on track, but no-one seems to be taking him seriously – until he finds himself in an Auror training session led by Harry Potter.

Exiled by A_factorygirl_69 (E, 16k)

Draco is declared persona non grata by the Ministry after the War. Harry has been tasked with keeping an eye on him, ensuring he stays out of England.

UnKnown by DorthyAnn (M, 23k)

Draco just wanted a second chance, he was willing to work hard, he was willing to do whatever it took, but no one would let him live down his past. But when he recklessly casts a spell promising a new life, he's not prepared for the consequences...

The Four Doors by fluxweed (E, 49k)

It’s been four months since Harry lost his memory. Four months of dead ends and no answers. With time running out until his memories are gone for good, Harry agrees to a course of Legilimency therapy with a renowned specialist: Mind Healer Draco Malfoy.

By the Grace by lettered (T, 140k)

Harry is an Auror instructor. Malfoy wants to be an Auror.

Tales From the Special Branch by Femme (E, WIP)

When Gawain Robards asks him to form Special Branch seven-four-alpha, Harry Potter knows they'll have to work outside the confines of the law--even though they are the law.

[maplefiasco]

8 Shows To Know Me

Thanks for the tag, @booksandabeer! This was extremely difficult and I look forward to kicking myself in a week when I remember some other show that's 20% of my personality but I totally blanked on when making this list.

No pressure tagging: @asmoonlightthroughthepines, @scare-ard--sleigh, @msmandapants, @blithers, @dontcallmebree and anyone else up for distilling themselves down to eight tv shows!

Okay let's do this!

Star Trek The Next Generation

TNG imprinted on me in 4th or 5th grade. I'd watch it every night before dinner and have lots of opinions about the holodeck and Data. Did I put a headband in front of my eyes and call it LaForge's visor? Yes. Did I unironically love the cheesy episodes like Rascals, The Game, and Disaster? Absolutely. It was also my intro to fannishness, pre-internet. One of my friend's dads had a stack of action figures, and a Riker uniform he'd break out at Halloween. I remember being confused by his whole deal, but mostly thinking it was really cool.

Flight of the Conchords

I saw this promo before the first season premiered and was instantly sold, it was so silly and unassuming. I was in college which is just. the perfect age to find everything about it delightful and hilarious and to be low-key in love with both Bret and Jemaine. I'm pretty sure I've thought about some lyric or throwaway line or small facial expression every day since 2007.

New Girl

I made myself limit this list to only one 2000s/2010s network comedy. New Girl edged out The Office, Parks & Rec, Community, 30 Rock, and even my beloved dark horse, Happy Endings. It's pure comfort. Every character is the best character.

Severance

I will not rest until everyone is as obsessed with this show as me. I've already watched season 1 three times, and I'll probably watch it all the way through again before season 2 comes out. It just hits all my buttons. Eerie weirdness! Sci-fi elements explored at a very personal, human level! Retro corporate dystopian branding and decor! Random moments of absurdity! Existential dread! Defiant jazz!

The Magicians

One doesn't keep up a semi-active sideblog for four years (?!!) and counting for a show without being permanently altered and irreparably damaged by it. One day, a work friend and I were talking tv and she went, "you would like this show! I wouldn't recommend it to everyone, but you would like it!" For better or worse... she was not wrong. (On the fandom side, the fic for this show is just exquisite. The art, edits, and gifs are impeccable. I'm grateful it compelled me to start making stuff more regularly. Fussy, high-effort stuff!)

Better Call Saul

I know, I know *pikachu surprised face* that this one made the list. Y'know that post that makes the rounds every once in awhile, about 'ships and fictional relationships that's like, "sure they're in love or whatever. But, like... do they even like each other?" I think this silly lawyer prequel to the crime-and-drugs show accidentally became the best display of two people who like and love each other on tv. (Also yes, everything else about it is A++. Meticulous. Stressful. Exhilarating. No notes.)

Simpsons (Seasons 1-8ish)

This feels like an embarrassingly basic answer, but my personality really is just several early seasons of The Simpsons in a trench coat. It's what shaped my sense of humor. It's the foundation of my marriage. It's why I knew what Citizen Kane was at eight years old.

Pushing Daisies

Pushing Daisies was one of the first times I felt like, "oh! Someone made a show for me specifically!" Every single element was a feast for the eyes, from the saturated colors, to the quirky, overly literal sets, to Chuck's outfits, to Lee Pace's face. Baking AND knitting were heavily featured in every episode! There was a cute romance with supernatural complications. There was whimsical, fairy tale-style Jim Dale narration!

Runners up include: Tuca & Bertie, Buffy, Firefly, Freaks & Geeks, Mad Men, Home Movies, Legion, WandaVision, The Mandalorian, and Lost.

[saturntovenus]

Pt1: Today Neelix and I went out into the forest. We saw blue jays and reindeer. Pretty lady bugs and sweet bumble bees. One of them even landed on my finger, and all I could do was stare at it as it seemed to lick the salt from my skin. At least, that's what my mind thought it had been doing. When I told him about this he just laughed, trying to hide it but failed miserably. "What? It has this weird tongue thing that sticks out. It's licking the salt from my skin because it's simply that delicious." I smiled. "Well kid, you better hope the queen doesn't hear you saying that." He looks around, "She might just chase you out of here."

He laughed again. Of course I got scared and hid behind the nearest tree. Today is my birthday actually. It's hard to believe mommy had me on this Stardate 11 years ago. Some say I'm even quite mature for my age, while others think playing make believe on the holodeck makes that less so. Neelix pats me on the shoulder every time someone says something though, he knows it bothers me.

So my mom gave me my very own journal today. Before I was just writing these on some of the pages in hers, but today I have my very own. All of my adventures are gonna go in here, including the ones with you Auntie Mina, and Jack too. I know I was really young when you guys would let me tag along, but I remember the time I fell and would've hit my head if it weren't for Jack. Dumb me tripped over his shoe. We laughed about it afterwards, but you kept asking me if I was okay. You made me pinky swear that I was fine, but like double double pinky swear. Mommy would ask about what we did, and even asked how I got the bruise on my leg. I didn't really tell her too much, but I didn't know how to lie and she saw through it all anyway.

Hm, I also remember the time when we went to the circus and you won me a stuffed animal. It was such an amazing day and i'll never forget it. I was younger then, and I've kept it ever since. I like to think that Mr patches and Snuffleuppagins are best friends who go on adventures of their own when no one is looking.

Pt2: "You are quite young my child, I suggest if you see the white rabbit, never ever follow." I came across a man with a rather large hat today, and he said these words to me. "A girl named Alice was not so very lucky." What did he mean? Is this the story of Wonderland? I have come across a giant maze, finding myself lost in dead ends.

I looked to the right and I saw her. Long blonde hair, wearing a white and blue dress. I called out but she ran away. Did I scare her? They say their are potions here that can make you big or small, and I was tempted to drink one. They sat on a small table as if all of this was planned, but who could've known I'd be here?? Am I the alice in this story or is she? Regardless I just kept running. Mushroom clouds, the Cheshire cats smile, and the queen of hearts. I saw the heart shaped tiles at the end of the grassy maze but I turned back.

I know this story, and what a twisted tale if it is the original. I cut the projection and visited my father. Him and I sat in the bedroom he had when you guys were children. I know he was only what I wanted him to be, but I loved just spending time with him, Even if he is a ghost. The whole of it is that I get to see my father, and I know my mommy preferred I hadn't. I know it makes her sad, but I just wanna get to know him. I hope she'll understand someday auntie mina, I wish things were different. I love you, and i'll write soon! Sincerely, The Adventurous Alfie Alferson.

P.s: I hope mommy knows I love her just as much...

[denimbex1986]

'Ripley is a new limited series that’s coming to Netflix. What’s it about?

Just recently, I referenced The Talented Mr. Ripley – but really I mention it all the time as it’s absolutely brilliant...

…I caught a movie called The Talented Mr. Ripley in the theater. I had no background on the (also excellent) novel by Patricia Highsmith at the time, and so I was completely taken with the dark and stylish tale of a young, troubled con artist named Tom Ripley (Matt Damon, in one of his best ever performances) and his obsession with a spoiled, debonair young man named Dickie Greenleaf (Jude Law). Gwyneth Paltrow, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Law are also incredible in it.

The Talented Mr. Ripley takes place in late 1950s Italy – 1958, in fact, one year before the release of Mingus Ah Um – and the film just looks spectacular, like it’s been generated in a genAI/ChatGPT/Holodeck thing for “make late 1950s Italy look like absolute heaven” engineering prompt.

And then, the music! There’s a tactile feel to the vinyl records that appear in the film, as the names of jazz giants are thrown around and also appear on album covers: Charlie Parker, Dizzy Gillespie, Miles Davis.

So therefore, I was all kinds of interested to learn that that there will be a new version of this story coming to Netflix, told by way of a limited series called Ripley. It stars Andrew Scott (the “hot priest” of Fleabag fame) as the titular Tom Ripley, Johnny Flynn as Dickie Greenleaf, and Dakota Fanning as Marge Sherwood.

To say the least, Ripley has a very high bar to pass to surpass the greatness of the film. Beyond what I mention above, the movie version boasts some of the best performances that Damon, Paltrow, Law, and Hoffman have ever given.

The Ripley trailer looks visually interesting, but it seems to lack the cool stylishness of the film, directed by Anthony Minghella. And while there’s no doubt that Andrew Scott is a great actor, I find the glimpses we get of him in the trailer to be somewhat concerning. He comes off more like an enigmatic serial killing weirdo and much less like the charming yet confused, vulnerable yet dangerous masterclass that Matt Damon puts on.

Now, that being said, I’m going to watch the hell out of every episode of this thing, and I’m hoping that I’ll be happily surprised on route.

A few other interesting tidbits:

* The IMDB page for Ripley says that this version of the story takes place in the 1960s, versus the ’50s-set film. Not sure why they updated the setting slightly, and then also obviously made a bold choice to film it in black-and-white (perhaps to clearly differentiate it from the breathtaking and splashy color of 1950s Italy we get from The Talented Mr. Ripley). * Johnny Flynn, who plays Dickie Greenleaf (Jude Law’s role in the film), is absolutely spectacular in a romcom TV show called Lovesick (in fact it’s #38 on Pop Thruster’s Best 100 TV Shows Ever). We barely see Flynn in the trailer, so I’m super curious and yet somewhat concerned about the casting here as well.

Ripley: when and where can I watch it?

Ripley will premiere on Netflix on Thursday, April 4th, 2024. The limited series comprises eight episodes.'

[towritecomicsonherarms]

TEN NEW COMICS YOU SHOULD PROBABLY CHECK OUT BECAUSE OF REASONS

Click the links for more info! 

Briar

What if Sleeping Beauty never got her happily ever after... and instead had to save herself? Set in a brutal fantasy world that time forgot, this isn't the fairy tale you know!

Vanish

Oliver Harrison was a mythical hero who slayed the greatest threat to his realm before even hitting puberty. But that was then. As an adult, Oliver leads an average cookie-cutter suburban life-aside from the fact that he's mentally unstable, massively paranoid, smokes like a chimney, and gets blackout drunk every night to hide from his horrific nightmares. Will the arrival of a superhero team called the Prestige prove the madness isn't all in Oliver's head? And what about all the epic fantasy crap from his childhood? 

The Roadie

More than thirty-five years after his heyday, a former heavy metal roadie must return to the backroads of America to do a job he thought he'd retired from: exorcist. But this time, he's not saving groupies and drunk bassists. He's trying to save his daughter. 

Earthdivers

The year is 2112, and it's the apocalypse exactly as expected: rivers receding, oceans rising, civilization crumbling. Humanity has given up hope, except for a group of outcast Indigenous survivors who have discovered a time travel portal in a cave in the middle of the desert and figured out where the world took a sharp turn for the worst: America. Convinced that the only way to save the world is to rewrite its past, they send one of their own on a bloody, one-way mission back to 1492 to kill Christopher Columbus before he reaches the so-called New World. 

Flawed

Frasier meets The Punisher! 

Maskerade

Felicia Dance is hiding in plain sight. The provocative social media star and shock TV sensation has one of the most recognizable faces in the world-so she can't capture and kill the butchers who murdered her little brother and experimented on Felicia like a lab rat when she was a child. Not unless she looks like someone else. 

Old Dog

Jack Lynch was a once-promising CIA operative. On the eve of retirement, looking back at a failed career, he is tasked with one final mission...that goes horribly wrong. He wakes years later to a changed world and deeper changes within him. When a shadow group offers Lynch a second chance at a life of adventure, he's paired with the last person he could ever imagine. In order to adjust, this old dog will have to learn some new tricks... 

Star Trek: Lower Decks

Soon after leading her crew on a planetary expedition aimed at building bridges and advancing Federation technology, Captain Freeman begins to suspect that the planet and its people are not all what they seem... Meanwhile, the crew in the lower decks take to the holodeck, enjoying some much-needed recreational time-until a bloodthirsty visitor decides to join in on their games! 

Creepshow

Each issue of CREEPSHOW will feature different creative teams with uniquely horrifying standalone stories. 

Shock Shop

a brand-new horror anthology flip comic taking place in a haunted comic book shop with a twisted retailer filled with tales of terror sure to leave you with the lights on.

[to-boldly-nope]

Thumbelina- Jean-Luc x Reader

Plot: {requested by @groovy-lady} Fairytale AU: Jean-Luc Picard x fem!Reader and the tale of Thumbelina (the Don Bluth version please)!!!

Words: 941

A/N: I honestly would write a longer one but I'm not feeling that well lmao

You hated every second of this. You didn't know if it was something Q had done, or if some alien decided to transport you into their world, or if you were actually stuck in the holodeck, but a) you hated being the size of a thumb, b) you didn't know if anyone was here with you, and c) you were getting married to an actual mole!

"And you, Thumbelina, take this mole to be your lawful wedded husband?" The rat preacher asked, making you give him a slight glare.

"Never. I cannot marry Mr. Mole, I don't love him!" You yelled as you threw your bouquet on the ground, making the audience of underground animals gasp.

You stormed off, but the toad that was chasing you earlier came crashing through the top of the cave.

"I marry you!" The toad yelled, trying to stop the already ruined wedding.

"No!" You groaned. "I no marry you, I go home!"

You continued to make your way out of Mr. Mole's tunnel when the beetle that took you to a ball  just to be made fun of showed up.

"Hiya, Toots!" Mr. Beetle greeted, making you roll your eyes as you picked up the bottom of your dress and continued to walk.

"I'm not your toots!" You called out as you continued further down the tunnel, trying to get away from the crowd chasing after you.

As you made it to the end, you realized that the tunnel was blocked off by Mr. Mole's gold coins, but you were determined to get out of there. You searched for a hole and you saw something shining.

"The sun. The sun is shining again," you told yourself as you moved a coin and made the whole pile come down.

You gave the underground one last look before escaping to the outside world. You wiped some dirt off of you as you admired the sunlight. As you were trying to still wrap your head around things, a swallow by the name of Jacquimo swooped down next to you.

"Jacquimo, it's you," you sighed as you gave him a hug. He seemed to be the only one who would help you.

"Yes, c'est moi. I have found the Vale of the Fairies."

"No, Jacquimo-"

"No, no, listen it is true. I talked to the rabbit, who talked to the fox, who talked to the bear, who know for sure. You see – ah, I show you. Jump on. Hang on!"

Jacquimo threw you up in the air and caught you on his back and flew you to the Vale of the Fairies.

~

"You brought me to a weed patch!" You yelled.

"No, it's the Vale of the Fairies," he stated. "Sing for them. Sing, Thumbelina."

"My name is (Y/N) and I just want to go home! I don't even know if anyone is here, I don't even know if Jean-Luc knows I'm here. I don't even know where here is!"

"But everything will be fine if you sing," the swallow said, making you groan. You weren't starting to like fairytales ever since you got here. You looked at Jacquimo and sighed.

"You will be my wings. You will be my only love.You will take me far beyond the stars. Jacquimo, this is silly. This is a weed patch," you pointed out.

"Trust me, it is the Vale of the Fairies, just sing."

"Can't you just take me home?"

"Let me be your wings. Like that. Sing, like that," he instructed.

"You will lift me high above," you sang out, watching for a change in the environment.

"Oh, magnifique!"

Everything we’re dreaming of will soon be ours. Anything that we desire, anything at all. Everyday you’ll take me higher," you sang, finally getting hopeful. You frowned as the environment stayed the same old weed patch.

"Let’s be practical," you sighed as you sat down on the branch that you were standing on. "This isn’t the Vale of the Fairies. And whoever is supposed to save me is never going to show up."

"Mon amour?"

You looked over and saw Jean-Luc and behind him was fairy wings. You couldn't help but to giggle.

"Oh, these," he pointed out, "Laugh all you want."

"I can't believe that I found you. I thought I was going to be stuck here forever."

"You know, I've seem to notice a pattern with these situations," Jean-Luc pointed out, making you tilt your head.

"Yeah? What is it?"

"Not only is it us two, but we always seem to kiss or get married at the end before returning to the ship. So, (Y/N), will you marry me?"

"Oh, so we're single in this universe?" You laughed.

"Apparently so," Jean-Luc laughed with you.

"Gee, I don't know if I want to marry you again," you thought aloud, making him smile at you. "I mean, I guess I can marry you twice."

"Honestly, I couldn't ask for anything better," he stated before leaning in for a kiss.

~

Remember when the author said in a previous post that Picard doesn't show much public affection? Yeah, well when the two of you were kissing, you both teleported back onto the bridge and everyone saw. You opened your eyes and jumped back.

"Mon amour, what seems to be-"

You saw some color drain from his face as he realized where he was. He straightened his uniform before sitting in the captain's chair. You gave him a slight wave before leaving the bridge, blushing from ear to ear.

"Sir, may I speak freely?" Riker whispered to Jean-Luc.

"What, Number One?" He sighed, waiting for Riker's comment.

"I didn't take you for a person for public affection," Riker laughed while Jean-Luc sighed and watched the monitor in front of him.

[sshbpodcast]

Tales from the Holodeck: ENT Fanfic: Jake’s Teleplay

Celebration! We’ve luckily finished Star Trek: Enterprise here on A Star to Steer Her By, and good riddance. There’s only one thing left to do in our typical style: show the writers how it’s really done by writing up our own fanfic stories and teleplays with carefully selected characters from the series. Will they end up better than most episodes of Enterprise? Low bar, folks.

We’re wrapping things up with Jake’s teleplay in our “Tales from the Holodeck” fanfic series, which shines some light on what we all know about humanity’s first contact with Vulcans. Follow along below and/or listen to the cold reads on this week’s podcast episode (this one starts at 1:24:42). Get ready to get prank’d!

[images © Paramount/CBS]

“The Greatest Prank Ever Pulled”

By Jake

Random Main Character Pick(s): Mayweather Character Draft Picks: Mestral, Zefram Cochrane

SCENE 1 - INT. STANFORD PROPULSION AND SPACE EXPLORATION GROUP LAB, AFTERNOON

Fade in to reveal the advanced propulsion laboratory at Stanford University, California. The lab is in a state of disarray with boxes of papers and envelopes marked "TOP SECRET" scattered about. Graduate student LILY SLOANE flutters about hastily sorting through piles of papers and placing some into boxes while others go into the trash. Her husband, TRAVIS SLOANE, also a graduate student, stands in front of a whiteboard covered in equations and engineering diagrams, seemingly oblivious to the chaos around him. LILY picks up an envelope, opens it, and considers its contents for a moment.

LILY (reading): Antimatter Conversion Ratio Test Results, Group B. (to TRAVIS) We shouldn't need these any more, right? (beat) Travis?

TRAVIS: Huh?

LILY: The results for the group B antimatter conversion ratio tests?

TRAVIS: Right. Uh… Trash it.

LILY sighs

LILY: I spent four weeks modeling the reaction chamber dynamics for this test. Seems a shame to just shred it. Oh, well…

She throws the envelope into the trash. She continues going through documents; most go into the trash. After a moment:

LILY: You know, this would go a lot faster with two people.

TRAVIS: I'll stop. I'm sorry. It's just… This is fucked up. We're close. Like weeks away close. They can't just shut us down now.

LILY: They can. And they have. The Department of Energy has declared the entire area at-risk of potential invasion.

TRAVIS: I know, but let's be real, though. If the ECON attacks, they're not going to storm the beaches of Half-Moon Bay. They're going nuke us from orbit and we'll be reduced to ash in the blink of an eye.

LILY (sarcastically): Real, nice, Travis…

TRAVIS: You know what this research could mean. For humanity. Virtually limitless energy. Access to off-world resources. There'd be nothing left to fight over! (Sighs. Takes Lily's hand) And maybe we could leave this rock and all its bullshit behind.

LILY: (Laughs) And go where, exactly? From where I'm standing this is the only rock we've got. Even if this thing works we're still decades away from a practical engine, let alone a space ship.

TRAVIS: I know.

LILY: Look. I know how important this is to you… To us… And it does feel like we're close to something big. This isn't the end, T. When this whole thing blows over we'll build your space ship.

They embrace.

ZEFRAM (O.S.): Woah, get a room, you two!

ZEFRAM COCHRANE enters. While the same age as TRAVIS, years of drinking and drug use has taken its toll and he looks significantly older. He's wearing a stained Led Zeppelin T-Shirt and is wearing sunglasses. He's carrying a case of beer, and looks ready to party. LILY rolls her eyes when she notices him, clearly fed up with his shit. TRAVIS seems excited to see him.

TRAVIS: Zef!

ZEFRAM: The one and only!

The two friends approach and execute a complicated handshake. LILY is not impressed.

LILY: Wow, Zef, it's only 3 PM, seems a little early for you to be up.

ZEFRAM: (sarcastically) I love you, too.

TRAVIS: It's good you're here. Prof says we need to be fully cleared out by Friday night. All the drives have been wiped, and we just have the hard copies to deal with-

ZEFRAM: (interrupting) Don't sweat it. I'll chat with The Meister, buy us some more time.

LILY: Good luck with that… This comes from the government.

ZEFRAM: Pfft… They've got bigger fish to fry. Besides, I've taken care of everything.

LILY: What's that supposed to mean?

ZEFRAM: Lily, my dear, I've got two words for you: Bozeman. Montana.

TRAVIS: (confused) Bozeman, Montana? What's there?

LILY: (under her breath) You know, besides nothing?

ZEFRAM slams the case of beer down on a table and cracks open three cold ones. He hands one to TRAVIS. He tries to hand one to LILY who instead crosses her arms. Unfazed, ZEFRAM decides to two-fist it.

ZEFRAM: Salvation.

FADE TO BLACK

SCENE 2 - INT. THE OFFICE OF PROFESSOR PAUL J. MESTRAL, STANFORD UNIVERSITY - EVENING

PROFESSOR MESTRAL sits stoically behind the desk in his sparsely decorated office. Outwardly he appears to be a man of about seventy, but in reality he is a Vulcan who is nearly one hundred and fifty years old. Not even his students are aware of his true identity. TRAVIS and LILY are seated across from him, while ZEFRAM stands, having just pitched his Montana idea. There is a long pause before MESTRAL speaks.

MESTRAL: These people… They are criminals?

ZEFRAM: NO! No no no no. No. They're in the militia. You know, like George Washington or Sam Adams. Freedom fighters.

MESTRAL: (skeptically) I see. And they have access to an advanced aerospace propulsion laboratory with facilities for antimatter experimentation?

ZEFRAM: Not yet… but they're working on it. I mean. we'll have to help them. You know, tell them what you buy. Maybe, uh, borrow some equipment from the university on the down-low. But they're committed.

MESTRAL: And how are you connected to these people?

ZEFRAM: I've known them my whole life. I grew up out there, remember? Plus, my cousin is a member. He put in a good word, and made some introductions.

LILY: (unimpressed) Tell him what they expect in return.

ZEFRAM: Right. Yeah. So I may have had to tell a little white lie about what we're-

LILY: (interrupting) He told them it was a bomb!

MESTRAL raises an eyebrow at this and leans in.

ZEFRAM: Not a bomb, exactly. I just explained the basics of antimatter theory and implied that there could… Potentially… be some military applications.

TRAVIS: It's crazy, Professor. We shouldn't have even brought it up. Just silly, really. We're sorry to have bothered you.

TRAVIS starts to stand.

MESTRAL: Tell them we accept.

LILY: (shocked) WHAT?!

MESTRAL: Contact the people in Montana and make the necessary arrangements.

LILY: I'm sorry, professor, did you miss the part where these nutjobs want us to build them an antimatter bomb?!

MESTRAL: I did not, Miss Sloane. You are all well-aware of the importance of this research, and its potential impact on the future of this planet. Terminating the warp program at this time would be illogical. Mister Cochrane's contacts in Montana have presented us an opportunity to continue this work. Logic dictates that we must accept their offer.

LILY: (quietly) Faust said the same thing…

FADE TO:

SCENE 3 - INT. THE OFFICE OF PROFESSOR PAUL J. MESTRAL, STANFORD UNIVERSITY - NIGHT

Later that evening. MESTRAL is alone, packing boxes. A figure appears in the doorway. MESTRAL notices, but doesn't look up.

MESTRAL: If you are here for office hours, you'll have to come back tomorrow.

The figure takes a step into the room.

SOTEK: I've come to take you home, Mestral.

MESTRAL looks up as the figure steps into the light. It's a Vulcan man, SOTEK. He appears quite a bit younger than MESTRAL. MESTRAL knows the jig is up.

SOTEK: The high command has determined that your mission on Earth has concluded and you're to return with me to Vulcan immediately.

MESTRAL is taken aback… as much as a Vulcan can be taken aback.

MESTRAL: My mission ended ninety years ago. I have decided to remain here of my own volition.

SOTEK: The high command chose to allow you to continue your mission indefinitely to more closely monitor the development of this civilization, otherwise you would have been retrieved long ago.

MESTRAL: Then I wish to continue monitoring this civilization.

SOTEK: That is no longer possible. Continued observation would serve no logical purpose as we have deemed Humans unsuitable for contact. We now believe that their self-destruction is imminent.

MESTRAL: (snaps, Vulcanly) I disagree with that assessment. I believe the humans are on the verge of an awakening.

SOTEK approaches MESTRAL, assessing him. He notices that MESTRAL's ears have been surgically modified to appear more human.

SOTEK: You have altered your appearance. Perhaps your affinity for these people has affected your judgement. The high command is confident that the current political tensions will escalate into a global conflict within the next six months. Given the Humans' capability for destruction, it is highly probable that their annihilation will soon follow…

MESTRAL: The high command hasn't been here. While it is true that war appears likely, there is still hope for this civilization. They are a resilient and resourceful people. The work being done in this lab is proof of that. I estimate they are only a few years away from a functional warp reactor.

SOTEK: It is only through your interference that they have made any progress at all.

MESTRAL is becoming visibly frustrated.

MESTRAL: That's simply untrue!

SOTEK: I see that this conversation has distressed you. You will return with me to Vulcan.

He produces a small data pad from his cloak and places it on the desk.

SOTEK: The location of my vessel is encoded on here. If you do not come willingly within two days, I have been authorized to coerce your return by any means necessary. It is time to come home.

SOTEK leaves. MESTRAL stands motionless for a moment before he violently throws the box he was packing across the room, scattering its contents.

FADE TO BLACK

SCENE 4 - INT. STANFORD PROPULSION AND SPACE EXPLORATION GROUP LAB, MORNING

The next day. The lab has been mostly cleared of clutter. Only a few neatly-stacked boxes remain. TRAVIS and LILY are standing at the whiteboard having just sketched out a diagram of a warp reactor. ZEFRAM is seated at a nearby workstation with his feet up on a lab table. He's sipping from a bottle wrapped in a brown paper bag.

TRAVIS: I think it'll work.

LILY: It'll probably work.

TRAVIS: It might work.

LILY: Definitely.

TRAVIS: You think?

LILY: I do.

TRAVIS: Me, too.

ZEFRAM: JEEESUS CHRIST!

LILY: Oh, fuck off, Zef. This is big!

ZEFRAM: You've been staring at that diagram for twenty minutes! (mockingly) "it'll work" "no it won't" "yes it will" "I know it will" SHUUUT UP!

TRAVIS: You're the engineer, do you think it'll work?

ZEFRAM: I think it's got equal chances of either working or creating a fireball visible from Mars.

TRAVIS: (smiling) I'll take those odds.

ZEFRAM gets up and takes a closer look at the diagram.

ZEFRAM: The coil is too small.

ZEFRAM starts writing out equations on the whiteboard. He narrates as he writes.

ZEFRAM: I figure the reactor has to be putting out… let's say… one point two-one petajoulses per second. Roughly. Best case scenario we maybe capture seventy-five to eighty percent of that as plasma.

TRAVIS: You're overestimating it. The warp bubble should be able to form at around point seven PJ per second.

ZEFRAM: Sure, if we were dealing with only superconductors. There's going to be a lot of copper in this thing-

LILY: He's right.

LILY grabs the marker from ZEFRAM and finishes the equations he was writing.

LILY: It'll need to be at least thirty percent bigger. Any smaller and it would melt within seconds from the heat. Your space ship would be stranded a few million miles from Earth with no warp coil.

ZEFRAM: (self-satisfied) As I said, too small.

ZEFRAM goes back to his seat and takes a celebratory sip of whatever poison he's been drinking.

ZEFRAM: That's what I like about you, Sloane: you get it. Travis: you're all theory.

TRAVIS: Yeah, well, we would've figured it out anyway.

LILY finishes the calculation, erases the number that had been written on the diagram and plugs in the new value.

ZEFRAM: Now it'll work…

MESTRAL enters, looking somewhat perturbed

ZEFRAM: Morning, prof. Look at what your star pupils did.

MESTRAL: Have you spoken to your contacts in Montana?

ZEFRAM: Yeah, it's all set up. Even gave them a shopping list.

MESTRAL: Good. We will leave tonight.

TRAVIS: Tonight?! I thought we had until Friday.

ZEFRAM: Kind of short notice.

MESTRAL: The situation has changed.

LILY; What about all of the equipment? We haven't even finished packing up the lab.

MESTRAL: We will take as much as we can.

TRAVIS: What about the antimatter?

ZEFRAM: Yeah, it's not like we can just throw it in the back of a pickup. The entire containment vessel will have to come with us.

TRAVIS: Even then it needs constant power.

MESTRAL: We will have to produce more on-site.

LILY: That's going to be difficult unless Zefram's militia friends happen to be hiding a particle accelerator in their survival bunker. It took us half a year to produce two grams of antideuterium and that was with a state of the art collider.

MESTRAL considers for a moment.

MESTRAL: There may be another way.

FADE TO:

SCENE 5 - INT. STANFORD PROPULSION AND SPACE EXPLORATION GROUP LAB, MORNING

The next day. A small, brown capsule about the size of a watermelon sits on a table in the lab. ZEFRAM, LILY, and TRAVIS are standing around the table studying it intently. MESTRAL is seated nearby.

TRAVIS: How is this possible? There must be over a kilogram in there…

LILY: One point three seven kilograms. Approximately.

TRAVIS: And it's completely stable. I just- I don't- Just- How?

MESTRAL: A contact at the DOE who… owed me a favor.

ZEFRAM: Must've been some favor. This is some next-level area fifty-one type shit. There's no way we're supposed to have this.

TRAVIS: There's enough antideuterium here to sustain our experiments for decades.

ZEFRAM: Or build one kickass warp reactor.

The three students look up at each other, realizing that this is real. MESTRAL stands, looking somewhat forlorn.

MESTRAL: Indeed, Mister Cochrane. The antimatter in that pod should be more than sufficient to fuel the engine prototype.

TRAVIS: So that's it, then, the rest of the equipment is already loaded into the truck. We can leave tonight.

MESTRAL breathes a heavy sigh.

MESTRAL: I'm afraid I will not be joining you in Montana.

LILY: What?! Why?

MESTRAL: In exchange for the antimatter, I have agreed to work for the government.

LILY: Then give it back! We can't do this without you.

TRAVIS: She's right, Professor. We'll find some other way to synthesize the antimatter. There's no way we could build the prototype without your guidance.

MESTRAL raises his hand to stop them speaking. He walks over to the whiteboard which still has the prototype design sketched out.

MESTRAL: You do not need me. I have every confidence in your skills as engineers and scientists. The design is sound, and you now have all of the resources you need to build it. But you must do it on your own; I cannot help you further.

LILY: Will you join us later? Will we see you again?

MESTRAL: That I cannot say. Know that I am… proud… of the work you have accomplished, and that I have every confidence in your skills as scientists and engineers. Your work, I believe, has the potential to usher in a new era for humanity.

A long pause. ZEFRAM realizes something.

ZEFRAM: Hold that thought.

He runs over to a cupboard labeled, "Office Supplies", opens it and fishes around inside for a moment before pulling out a bottle of whisky and four shot glasses. The others stare at him.

TRAVIS: Is there anyplace in this lab you haven't hidden booze?

ZEFRAM: What? It's my Rainy Day Fund. Besides, this is the good stuff.

ZEFRAM returns and places the shot glasses on the table. He uncorks the bottle and haphazardly pours the shots, spilling quite a bit in the process. Finally he picks up one of the shot glasses and raises it. TRAVIS and LILY follow suit after a moment.

MESTRAL: I do not imbibe alcohol. (beat.) But exceptions can be made.

MESTRAL picks up a glass and holds it up with the others.

ZEFRAM: I've never been one for speeches, so I'll just say: To a new era for Humanity.

TRAVIS: To the warp program.

LILY: To you, Professor.

All three students nod to this. MESTRAL appears close to tears.

MESTRAL: To peace… and long life.

ZEFRAM: Hear Hear!

All four raise their glasses and down the spirit. ZEFRAM flaps his arms like a bird and lets out an audible "woah". LILY and TRAVIS try to suppress their reaction to the strong alcohol and almost succeed. MESTRAL looks at the empty glass as if to say, "not bad". They all stand in meaningful silence for a long moment.

ZEFRAM: (soberly. ish.) We, uh, should get going if we want to make Reno by nightfall.

ZEFRAM holds out his hand to the professor.

ZEFRAM: It's been real.

MESTRAL shakes ZEFRAM's hand, who promptly pulls him in for a "bro hug". As ZEFRAM steps back, LILY comes forward and wipes away the tear forming in her eye.

LILY: We will build it, Professor.

MESTRAL just nods. He holds out his hand to shake, but LILY ignores it and goes straight for the tender hug. It's then TRAVIS's turn.

TRAVIS: I don't know how to thank you for-

MESTRAL: Thank me through your work. Take humanity to the stars.

TRAVIS nods, holding back a deluge of emotion. He embraces MESTRAL strongly, and holds for a long moment. As he backs away he sees something he'd never seen before: tears welling up in the Professor's eyes.

ZEFRAM picks up the antimatter pod and makes his way out of the lab followed by LILY. TRAVIS takes a final survey of the lab before turning to leave. MESTRAL stands in the empty lab, completely overcome with emotion. After a moment he composes himself and begins erasing the reactor diagram from the whiteboard.

FADE TO BLACK

SCENE 6 - INT. ENTERPRISE MESS HALL 6

HOSHI, TRIP, T'POL, and MAYWEATHER are seated in the mess hall. All attention is on MAYWEATHER as he finishes telling his story.

MAYWEATHER: After that, the rest is history.

HOSHI: I just can't believe the professor didn't go with them!

TRIP: I just still can't get over the part where you're actually related to Lily and Travis Sloane! I mean, they're basically legends! I went to Lily Sloane high school, for chrissake! How have you not told us this before!?

MAYWEATHER shrugs.

MAYWEATHER: I guess it just never came up.

HOSHI: It's an amazing story, Travis.

T'POL: Indeed, but a story nonetheless. The details seem… implausible.

MAYWEATHER: I mean, it's a family story, so I'm sure some of it has been lost to time, but that's how it was always told to me.

T'POL: It seems highly unlikely that humans of that period would possess the technology to construct an antimatter storage pod of the style you described.

TRIP: Do you know what ever happened to the professor? Did they ever see him again?

MAYWEATHER: Not that I know of. I think everyone just assumed that he went missing during the war. So many did back then.

TRIP: He was so instrumental, yet history doesn't even know he existed.

T'POL: (incredulously) If he existed.

HOSHI rolls her eyes.

HOSHI: Well I, for one, believe it. (Beat.) Anyway, I'm late for bridge duty.

MAYWEATHER: Me too.

They all stand and start to leave. As they walk out…

TRIP: You got any other family stories about the Sloane's or Cochrane?

MAYWEATHER: A few've been passed down. Remind me later to tell you the one about when Zefram Cochrane entered a hotdog eating contest…

TRIP: No kiddin'…

FADE TO BLACK

SCENE 7 - EXT. SOMEWHERE DEEP IN THE WOODS - NIGHT

A small Vulcan starship rests in a clearing. A vehicle approaches. The door to the spacecraft opens, and a walkway slides out to the ground. SOTEK steps out. The car stops and MESTRAL emerges.

SOTEK: I am gratified that you have chosen to return willingly.

MESTRAL says nothing. He starts up the ramp into the ship. SOTEK turns to go back in, but just before they enter the ship, MESTRAL neck pinches SOTEK, who collapses unconscious.

MESTRAL: I am truly sorry, friend. I will return with you, but there's something I must do first…

MESTRAL enters the ship.

FADE TO BLACK

THE END

—

For more Enterprise fanfic, check out Caitlin, Chris, and Ames’s stories from this year’s “Tales from the Holodeck”! Be sure to keep listening to new episodes every Thursday on SoundCloud or wherever you podcast, follow us on Facebook and Twitter, and why don’t you come with me, little girl, on a magic carpet ride.

[trekbait]

Upcoming holonovel releases this month!

Catch the latest entertainment, available soon at your local holosuite!

Captain Proton Versus the Zombies of the Stratosphere!

Tom Paris’ latest instalment in his Captain Proton series has Proton face off against undead alien invaders who seek to swap their dying planet’s location for Earth’s warm orbit. It is down to you to stop them from throwing Earth away into the cold void of space with the power of atom bombs!

Vulcan Love Slave, Volume VII: T’Hot in Prison

Fresh off Ferenginar’s anonymous erotic presses, this latest tale from the Vulcan Love Slave series sees T’Hots thrown into a barbaric Breen prison where she must “bond” with her fellow female inmates to plan an escape. Can she distract the attention of the cold and mysterious Breen guards to allow her comrades in chains to melt away the ice walls of their cells with their physical activity? (Please note this programme may be restricted in some Starfleet holodecks; check before you download)

Human

The first Exocomp-written holonovel follows the crew of the all-Exocomp science ship Omortson who come across a derelict spaceship in an uncharted asteroid belt. The brave Exocomps mistakenly release a creature from stasis, a deadly and aggressive Human who starts to stalk and murder the crew within their own vessel. Can you survive and ensure the Human doesn’t escape the ship onto other worlds?

Sharknado Attack!

When a freak hurricane swamps San Francisco, thousands of sharks terrorize the waterlogged Starfleet Command. Pyblic Domayne HoloProductions previously became famous for adapting classic Human works like Dixon Hill, Sherlock Holmes, Beowulf and Shakespeare. With the recent craze for Human stories from the early 21st century they’ve been adapting that era’s golden classics such as Bubba Ho-Tep, 50 Shades of Grey, The Emoji Movie and Daddy Day Camp. Sharknado is celebrated as one of the great works of the era and this is the best adaptation of the work to date!

An Eye for a Golden Lady

Felix’s Secret Agent series continues as you are sent on a mission to retrieve the kidnapped daughter of the Japanese emperor. As you travel across ancient Earth in style, uncovering a vast criminal arms conspiracy, all our nuclear war is on the line! But you'll still find time to seduce the princess and sample the local martinis.

Photons Be Free: The Opera

The Doctor, from Voyager, has adapted his tale of photonic servitude for those more musically inclined. The 5-hour-long operatic masterpiece will have you singing along (autotuned if necessary) with the characters as you play an abused holographic slave to an evil crew. The locations are redesigned to be more abstract like stage dressing and, based on the quality of your performance, expect a round of applause for your performance!

[hiccupmistress]

Season 7 - Tuvok tries to design a holodeck training program to help the crew practise combatting The Borg. However, as a joke, Tom inserts the “easter egg” that if the user asks to face “nine Borg”, the program will instead recreate 20th Century film actor, Ernest Borgnine.

Naturally, the holodeck malfunctions and refuses to produce the exit, leaving Tuvok stuck in the holodeck with the aging actor. To make matters worse, the Ernest Borgnine hologram believes he is in his role as the grandpa narrator guy from “Merlin’s Shop of Mystical Wonders”, meaning Tuvok is treated as if he were a kid and is told lengthy tales of how the wizard Merlin caused all sorts of family-friendly eldritch horrors in the 1990s. Meanwhile, Harry and Torres try to override the holodeck malfunction to little avail.

The episode was cancelled, as it was seen a bit of a stretch for the sake of an obvious pun.

Disclaimer: This is a fan-made parody account and is in no way representative of actual unproduced episodes of Star Trek.

[holo-squad]

Holoween Prompts

Only five days to go until we begin our week-long Holoween bash! (For details, see my pinned post!)

Would you like to write something or create some art for the week of ghostly holo-horror tales, but can't quite think of anything that would fit? Here are a few ideas to get your started!

The crew makes a pit stop at some far-flung trading station and Picard acquires an Ancient Artefact of Great Renown and Immeasurable Value (i.e. he's sweet-talked into paying way too much for an old piece of junk). Raffi decides it looks like a Ouija board and holds an impromptu sceance, since it's Halloween and all. Unfortunately, it turns out the artefact is not some harmless piece of junk but a highly sophisticated piece of technology that can mess up all kinds of computer code...

Rios is haunted by ghosts of his past and the holos decide to help him through it.

After a few gruelling months of close calls with hostile ships and diplomatic incidents, Steward digs through a database of ancient Earth customs to find something that might cheer up the crew's spirits. He lands on a tradition called a "Halloween Party", which may or may not end in disaster...

Emil has to patch up various participants of Elnor's "introduction to pumpkin carving (with a guest lecture by Emmet on the advantages and disadvantages of various types of knives)".

It's only been a year since Rios has had this holographic "crew" of his, and their relationship is strained, to say the least. When a computer glitch threatens to turn his Emergency Holograms into hollow, lifeless specters of their former selves, he has to decide how far he is willing to go to save them.

Enoch tries to create a corn maze on the holodeck. Things only get more convoluted from there.

Feel free to use any of these as straight-out prompts or modify them to your heart's content!

And if you don't have the time or spoons to create something new, remember: Holoween is an excellent time to practice a little bit of resurrection!

Simply post a link to a work you have already published or reblog some art and tag me, so I can find it and reblog it!

Let's all get ready for a very spooky Holoween!

[writingsfromstarfleet]

[Vorik] Feelings

♫ - Breathe Me - Sia

A/N: For a lovely Anon, this was really fun to write; a character I definitely didn’t expect, but I’m very happy I did! I hope you enjoy, as do I all of you, too! Thanks for reading! Hugs :) x

Life on Voyager, despite being stuck in the Delta quadrant, never was boring. Every day seemed to have some mishap or hostile alien species ready to attack. Truly, never a dull day. Engineering was always full of life, and it was by far the best division to be in. You worked under B'Elanna for most of it, and made some very good friends. Among them, you took to a quiet Vulcan, Vorik.

At first, he seemed very standoffish, but you hadn't taken it personally, as you knew that was how Vulcans were. Through steely determination, however, the ensign had begun to talk to you more and more, and eventually, he became someone you could call a friend. Over time, the feelings of friendship began to dwindle, and you felt them being replaced by stronger feelings.

Your attempts to get him to hang out with you were futile in the beginning, and he always denied it. Your determination was the only thing that stopped you getting frustrated; you were adamant you could get him to spend an evening with you, and eventually, you found success.

"Hey, are you busy tonight?" you spoke, voice happy and bright as always. Vorik nodded his head in greeting towards you.

"I am not, no. Why do you ask, Y/N? Do you wish to partake in a meeting tonight?" His voice was flat, though had a tone of curiosity at your question broke through.

"If you would. We could grab some food, or visit the holodeck, anything you would like, really. I just thought it might be nice to relax after this week."

He stared at you for a few moments. Rare it was for him to be invited anywhere, let alone have someone be so persistent with him. It peaked his interest, and so he accepted.

"That would be nice, Y/N. I will see you tonight."

As he walked off, your heart fluttered. Vorik had said yes? Yes? You were now excited for the evening to roll around. When it did, you were ready, and as prompt as you would expect, Vorik had arrived at your quarters. The door opened, and Vorik stood, as handsome as ever, and offered a greeting to you.

"Good evening, Y/N, I trust your day was well."

"It was, thank you. Please, come in."

The evening was filled with conversation, Vorik opening up more and more as the night went on. To your surprise, he was a conversationalist and had a lot of stories to tell, from his time on Vulcan exploring the Osana Caverns to the tales of his time at the academy. You, in turn, shared your own experiences with him. Over the course of the night, you found yourself coming to one stark realisation; you loved Vorik. Your mind wandered.

The first time you saw him, you were drawn to him; he was very handsome. Though, upon speaking to him, it became clear he was a quiet man. Rude he may have seemed to anyone who was unfamiliar with Vulcans and their culture, but not to you. You knew of the Vulcans confined nature, and that was when your goal of having him open up came into play. You remembered the first time you made him smile, a genuine smile, and the first time you heard his laugh. He would deny it, but he had the sweetest laugh. The times you shared in the mess hall, conversing and debating over drinks, and the times you shared on shift, arguing over test results. Each of those moments ran through your head as you confirmed what you had known for a while. Love.

You knew Vorik wouldn't return the feeling, but you decided to tell him anyway, needing to get it off your chest. Even if he rejected you, you could live with it, you just needed to tell him.

"Vorik, I have something I'd like to say." He nodded, a silent gesture to allow you to continue. "I may possibly have developed feelings for you, and uh- well, I.." you trailed off, unsure of how to continue. "Oh, well, it- it's nonsense isn't it, it-"

"It is perfectly logical, Y/N." Vorik cut you off, his expression suggesting you were rambling once again. He'd never admit it, but he found it amusing when you went off on a tangent, often giving himself leeway for a chuckle. Bringing his mind back to the present situation, he continued. "I have been aware of these feelings, as I too have been experiencing them in regards to you. I have for a while, though I was not sure of how to approach you about them. It is an unusual experience, but I am glad I can share this with you."

You sat there and just looked at him. Vorik felt the same connection you did. As a rule, Vulcans didn't tend to stray into emotions, and yet, here he was, expressing his own admiration of you. Your heart did leaps, and you placed a hand on his forearm, which was resting on the table, careful not to overstep the boundary of touching his hand. Vorik moved his own arm, and took your hand in his lightly. You looked at him with love in your eyes, and found the same staring back. The silence that surrounded you both was comfortable, and a wave of happiness and contentment overcame you. Smiling, you mind wandered to the future.

This was the last place you would expect to be, but the only place you ever wanted to be.