#take these fuckers down
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I wanna fuck this man so good that he sees heaven again…

#lucifer morningstar#hazbin hotel#hazbin lucifer#hazbin hotel lucifer#i was peer pressured into making this just so you know#take this as my official monster fucker declaration#I’m never living this down 😭
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i think i was so thrown off by the puppy spit slow motion that i completely forgot about the oh my God they kissed joke. i am sincerely happy that they don't have to filter themselves out that much these days, they deserve it. i do wish that didn't involve the various kinds of foreplay they've done on camera over the course of june, but i guess kink does belong in pride . so
#astra.txt#dan and phil#phan#sometimes i worry if i need to cool it on the sex jokes#but i feel like they discuss their sex lives for longer durations of time than their own fucking ad reads. and at least im joking#i know these fuckers are vers but daniel howell had made it his mission to prove that phil is the one getting dicked down#and taking a glance at ao3 i'm not really sure how many folks he's convincing#buries my face in my hands. alright time to finish marathoning their poppy playtime gigglefests
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in the category of things true in my heart: Steve has knocked out three of Pony's teeth rough housing, Soda has done the door n string trick to pull one out (pony TRIED to do this alone one time but he was too chicken to slam the door n two bit stuck up behind him n SLAMMED it n pony HOWLED like he'd been SHOT), n collectively as kids darry soda n pony helped pony get like four of his BARELY wiggly teeth out for cold hard tooth fairy cash
#every time steve knocked out of ponys teeth out pony would SCREAM#n it would always scare steve so bad#but darry would come in n take one look n be like man that tooth was about to come out either way pony HUSH#steve didnt knock out a permanent tooth it was a BABY one#ponys still losing his mind#man was NOT good with losing the baby teeth thing#by the time they were yanking ponys teeth out for money darry was old enough to know it wasnt real#but he knew that fucker would still get a quarter or two#so hes got his finger IN ponys mouth like CMON WE GOTTA HAVE ENOUGH CASH TO GET THAT NEW COMIC#(they get caught :()#also fun fact#i have a cousin thats 14 n still hasnt lost his last baby tooth#so pony could plausibly still have baby teeth by the time their parents die#which means darry gets to deal with the lovely experience of pony coming home with a mouth FULL of blood#n pouting so hard#bc he 'swallowed his thucking godthamn thooth'#darrys trying his best to be serious#its really only working a lil bit#the outsiders#ponyboy curtis#sodapop curtis#darry curtis#he loses a tooth one time with dallas n dallas cant even LOOK he finds that shit DISGUSTING#he takes him all the way home marching pony in front of him bc he cant stand to look or he'll vomjt#none of the boys let him live it down#dallas winston#steve randle#the outsiders 1983#two bit mathews#cw losing teeth
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Guardian Urak after ROUND 6 (his fuckass pet that he barely invested in beat another guy's overly-invested in pet)
#he dressed till in the most basic emo outfit and tossed him into the ring yelling SING BOY#yes he dgaf about the kiss. whatever it takes ig#this man literally keeps winning while doing the bare minimum#just because till is talented and is batshit crazy enough to put on a show even without fancy shit#/crazy shit keeps happening to till#guardian urak when till killed freddie: ayoooo#guardian urak when ivan kissed till: AYOOOOOOOOO#all he does is chain up till and toss him around and not give him anything good to the point where his clothes are the most casual ones#and till still comes out the winner somehow i bet that nasty fucker is laughing so hard watching shit go down#Guardian urak during an interview: yeah that shit was crazy. rip ivan. or whatever. thanks for doing that *waving around medal*#alnst#alien stage#alien stage till#guardian urak
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Thoughts/hcs re: the 2003 animated teen titans series:
Robin having multiple flavours of angst including but not limited to: "ScRew YoU yOu'Re nOT mY dAd", general teenage angst, not wanting to be under batman's shadow angst, thinks he's getting replaced by a younger sibling angst (jason), etc and running away from home to live on the custom built T shaped tower on the private island that's all very much being paid for by batman
At some point Jason steals the red x suit and uses it to torment Dick!robin CONSTANTLY. Bruce either doesn't know a thing about this or does, but doesn't let on that he knows, and is just watching on from a distance with fatherly affection like "aww they're bonding :)" while dick is popping a blood vessel with stress going "WHO is this KID???"
When Bruce adopted Jason he had no intention of making him Robin, but at some point the red x shenanigans were going so far that he actually started feeling bad for dick so he had to put his foot down like, alright, this kid clearly has some energy to burn off or something, let's redirect that energy to something more productive. Like punching the sHIT OUT OF GOTHAM GOONS HELL YEAH. And gives Jason the Robin ii mantle
Jason "gremlin child" Todd is clearly very "yippee :) violence" about this and the red x fuckery stops, but of course dick!robin finds out about this and is all "you replaced me?? >:'( I HATE YOU DAD" and his list of reasons to be angsty and emo increases yet again. Clearly his stress never ends
Eventually dick grows out of his teenage angst and becomes everyone's favourite big brother figure nightwing. And every time Jason tries to tell anyone about Dick's emo angsty edgy menace robin era NOBODY believes him. This is cosmic karma for all the times he broke into the titans tower and moved all of Dick's furniture two inches to the left so he'd stub his toe in the morning. And the time he replaced all of his birdarangs with custom made glitter bombs. And the time he bought a seam ripper and broke into titans tower AGAIN just to rip all the crotch seams of Robin's pants. And the time...you get the point
(Tim DOES know about Dick's edgy emo era (because he's a creepy little stalker FREAK) He just acts like he has no idea what Jason is talking about just to mess with him. Jason is TEARING his hair out and FOAMING at the mouth.)
#teen titans#batfam#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#tim tries to gaslight jason that his dip in the pit is fucking with his memories#jason is screaming and threatening to 'snap all his bones like a glowstick'#dick is being very level headed and trying to get them to calm down and play nice#jason: 'YOURE NOT HELPING' and 'IM GOING TO KILL YOU TOO FUCKER'#damian is sitting to the side waiting for them to kill each other so he can be an only child#bruce is watching them like 'aww :) theyre bonding' and takes a picture for the family album
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guys pls if u dont play kcd2 yourselves watch an LP of it because there was a scene just now that I can only describe as the biggest comedy of errors I've ever seen in a videogame
#>try to kidnap one of the popes men#>the only guy that speaks italian is a drunk monk. who cannot speak italian bc we forced him to be sober#> popes guy panics and runs away on horseback. chase him. gets closelined by a tree#> guy in the team who only speaks polish picks him up and tries to get him to calm down as hes screaming#> headbutts him. knocks him out#> bandit leader takes a look and sees that the poor fucker hit his head on a rock and died. fml#> gets into a looney toons style slapfight w the polish dude saying hes going to burn in hell as polish dude is lamenting god giving him#> a thick skull#good fucking god#kcd2#kcd2 spoilers
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#one piece#sanji#black leg sanji#everysanji#dressrosa#ch801#wanted poster update!!#and we're also done with dressrosa. wild#well ig that's what happens when he doesnt show up for 70 chapters#i made a note to myself as i was skipping through on the wiki for chapters i want to come back to#namely law's backstory and the law/luffy vs doffy fight#man i'm getting nostalgic for the first time i read one piece...#i really got into it in high school esp as a freshman#and i binged so much of it over spring break on a shady manga pirating app LMAO#but that would have been like march 2016 (9 years ago now!!! holy shit!!!) while wci i think was releasing#i remember dressrosa was pretty recent at that point so like regardless of how you feel...#idk dressrosa has always been an arc i've enjoyed personally bc of when i read it originally and i want to reread it in full but this blog#doesnt rest!!! i cant take the time to do that rn while queuing sanjis unfortunately#but bc wci is a sanji centric arc i probably will slow down to actually read some of it#you'll probably get my thoughts on it in the tags as we go too#i have a lot of thoughts and it ties in to why i dont want my posts here tagged as v*nsmoke at all#i've seen some of you fuckers talk about that in my notifications dont think i dont see you#i have my reasons for that. and its bc the vinsmokes suck major ass and sanji is not one of them#i plan on doing more full panels for that and maybe i'll bring back actually adding captions on some of those posts#sound off in the comments if you want that
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I AM NOT HERE. (i'm here to pick up your daughter) I AM TYPING FROM MY GRAVE. (your daughter calls me daddy too) JFC STOP STOP STOP. I DIDNT MEAN TO CATCH THE DUALITY (get you a man who can do both) BUT I DID, I WANNA PUNCH HIM (lovingly) IN THE FACE (with my lips, full blown make out bitch, tongue, teeth, sloppy, heated EVERYTHING idc if i can't breathe) FUCK YOU. DONT YOU LOOK AT ME WITH YOUR CAPTIVATING EYES FULLY KNOWING YOURE ABOUT TO DRAG ME INTO THE DEPTHS OF THE OCEAN (please do, honestly i beg of thee) GOOD GODS I WAS JUST TRYING TO FIND A CERTAIN QUOTE (there he is!! right there officer!! the thief!! of my heart!!) LORDS OF ALL PANTHEONS HAVE MERCY ON MY WEARY SOUL FOR THIS MAN HAS (bewitched, enchanted, ALL OF THE ABOVE) ME DOWNBAD, I CAN BARK, MEOW, WHATEVER YOU WANT, RAFAYEL, ILL DO ANYTHING. ASKLDJFLDSJFKS clearly i'm so normal about him.
#i found what i needed#but at what cost#TO BE ATTACKED BY THIS FUCKER#[kay voice] the SCREAM I SCREAMPT#i had to take a minute and SIT. THE. FUCK. DOWN.#paused the game and everything.#rafayel#rafayel lnd#lnd rafayel#rafayel lnds#lnds rafayel#rafayel lads#lads rafayel#rafayel l&ds#l&ds rafayel#rafayel love and deepspace#love and deepspace rafayel#lnd#lnds#lads#l&ds#love and deepspace
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If I was on the Tulpar nothing would’ve happened at all but not for any heroic or altruistic actions but because I’d constantly be beefing so hard with Jimmy there would be no time for him to do anything.
This is like also like in a world I know nothing of mouthwashing. I know we’d annoy each other so bad that all we’d think about is how to fuck with each other and ruin this experience. Likely for everyone else too.
#like I’m tripping him in the hall and when he tells Curly I’ll be like he just fell over my foot#he’s taking my rations and trying to push me down the stairs#he’s scared to leave his room at night cause I’m waiting to hit him over the head with the polle statue like fuck horse fucker#like it’s Tom and Jerry up in that bitch like he annoys me as a person like if we weee coworkers I see his name on the schedule and fall to#my knees and vice versa#real reason everyone sleeps bad is they hear us yelling at 3 am cause he accidentally nudged me in the hall and i took it way to personal#like this is just about me no analysis I just hate his as a person as well
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They should make a Waiting for your pain meds to kick in that doesn't Suck
#ace on stage#im taking -1 damage per second and the minimum time for these fuckers to kick in is anywhere from in 10 minutes to 25 minutes#im not even DOING anything right now im literally just Lying Down. but alas. my leg. does not like me.#save me hot water bottle and codeine. my two best friends
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A smooth jazz cover of the Killers' 'The Calling' would be so unbelievably, illegally sexy.
#that song really lives on its industrial elements and 'walking to kill captain america' bass beat BUT#if you take that out? turns out that fucker is SINUOUS#you put that in the mouth of a woman in a red dress on stage in a smoky club. you put some saxophone in it.#there is a nonzero possibility that she may actually be the devil and you may just be down one soul#because you would do annnnything for her attention#or yanno maybe that's just me but also. those lyrics. hoo boy
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jake mccabe i would die for you
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If one more man in my workplace tries to ask me out i will set the whole place on fire, i don't care anymore. I can't keep doing this over and over. These fucking idiots want to get into the pants of a fucking NPC, the person they work with isn't REAL! THAT'S A MIRROR MADE TO BOUNCE BACK WHATEVER YOU THROW AT IT IN HOPE TO END THE INTERACTION SWIFTLY AND WITHOUT ANY ISSUE. THAT SIMULACRUM OF ME IS THERE TO MAKE MONEY AND THAT'S ALL! NO friendship! NO relationship! You DON'T get to know anything about me! you get a COWORKER! and that's IT!
#IM SICK OF THIS SHIT!!! NO FUCKER! I DONT WANNA HANG OUT OUTSIDE OF WORK I DONT LIKE YOU!!!!!!#the ONLY guy who did this to me who was okay was the one who confessed his feelings on his last day right before quitting#he did scribble my initial inside a heart and it was up in the department for weeks but at least he wasnt in my FACE about it!#now i gotta fucking go to work tomorrow and be fucking stressed out and scared because i have to deal with turning down a motherfucker#i JUST started liking my job again and this is what i get????? can i get a fucking BREAK!?#benny babble#i needed to put this somewhere because im very honestly at my wits end here. like i guess that's what i get for being nice at work#dudes will really look at someone they think is a woman smile at then and take it as interest. im being POLITE
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as a romanian watching Castlevania the only thing that takes me out of the story and makes me cackle like a witch is the pronunciation of the town Târgoviște
like my brother in Christ thank Heavens they made it in English and no other romanian words are present (at least in season 1)
I am no longer horrified to not be able to properly pronounce some words in English
#castlevania netflix#castlevania#castlevania season 1#vlad dracula tepes#alucard#also#my brother in christ#i’m supposed to root for who????#dracula did nothing wrong#burn the fuckers down#THEY KILLED HIS WIFE#BURNED HER#also very nice of him to give them a year#too bad they’re fucking stupid and didn’t take the warning#andy rants
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Bruh, being in the US right now is a fucking trip. This feels like clown music playing 24/7 because like this shit can't be real, but no, it is. I now have to be scared that my mom will be dragged from hospice care if ICE agents come poking around. I now have to worry about if my dad or grandma will be taken, or shot or God knows what because people thought electing a convicted felon was a good idea. I now have to be even more careful about the shirts I wear, the bi keychain I have, in case I get shot one day because God forbid I have color and like women.
Is it so wrong to want to just be alive? Is my, or anyone who looks like me, happiness that much of a threat to you? If so, why? Are you so unhappy, hold so much disdain and anger that you lash out at anyone who just wants to be happy??
WHAT was so great about him?? Please, actually give me a reason for why you elected him, anyone, give me an actual reason for why he was worth all this. Is your hate that much stronger than your common sense that you would rather a convicted felon than anyone else?
#I honestly dont even want to know a reason at this point#because of this I have to live in fear for me and everyone in my family#I was born and raised here and yet I have to go about my day like there isnt a threat breathing down my neck#I just want to love dammit#I didnt want to live for most of my life#and now that i do#like hell will I let anyone take it away from me#i forged my will to live from nothing fuck you if you think some fucker in a suit will ever take that away from me#us politics#i hate the us#anyway#back to the funny nonsense thats usually on my blog
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Hi I don't know what this is meant to be but have it anyway
#currently watching stephen try boba for the first time as i tag this#i know this is the fandom slander meme but i ended up with this instead lmao#i legitimately don't know how to tag this so i guess I'll keep my regular ones??#stephen colbert#john oliver#jimmy kimmel#seth meyers#jon stewart#conan o'brien#craig ferguson#taylor tomlinson#strike force five#strike force memes#strike force#late night#meme#video#you'll never take me alive viacom#hiding the other fuckers down here#jimmy fallon#james corden#late night hosts
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