#tag it like Im a straight man i block you

[beatingheartbutch]

Aw do you like that baby? Thinking about my big butch cock stretching you out? Like the thoughts of me bending you over and inch in the girth of it slowly into your aching wetness, shooting a little lube in you to ease it in. Letting you cum only when you get half of it In because its just so big and filling? So ready to be filled up aren’t you? You just can’t wait for my cock to shoot into you a fuck you over and over. All until its fully in you. Precious girl you look so pretty around my cock.

-

MINORS AND MEN BLOCKED ON SIGHT

[risingsunresistance]

twitter is entering their "rts > likes" phase now that likes are private after they spent years calling us ungrateful for being demotivated by ratios lmao

[feyd-meowtha]

.

[scopophobia-polaris]

I think there are a lot of criticisms you can give to people who portray hylia as just evil especially when they project that onto any zelda, and end up sounding like complete misogynists. you can like evil women without sounding like textbook misogynist! not saying that you or your anons have done it I'm just venting at the tumblr fandom at large especially when they portray link as a man who can't do no wrong. plus the post was about morally GRAY hylia and not just Evil God Woman

Okay

[balletfilmss]

ISN’T SHE SO SWEET?

✸ pairing: percy jackson x daughter of artemis! reader smau

✸ notes: requested by @sunnflowerss-wp !! this prompt was fun & i looooooved incorporating my hunters of artemis girlies <3

…now playing: there she goes — the la’s

percyjacks: “but percy, she’s so scary” are we looking at the same person? 🤨 new moon=yn appreciation day

tagged: yn.ln

view all comments

team.leo: look i said that ONCE bc she shot me and i feared for my life

╰┈➤ percyjacks: excuses excuses, if she shot you then you deserved it

╰┈➤ team.leo: BRO THE GAME WAS OVER???

╰┈➤ percyjacks: LALALAL 👨‍🦯

╰┈➤ annabethc: did…did you just use a blind emoji for not being able to hear?

╰┈➤ percyjacks: omg beth let me live

piedpiper: EVERY day should be yn appreciation day wdym 😒

╰┈➤ percyjacks: yk what piper, you’re so right, my sincerely apologies to everyone

yn.ln: NOOOOO BABE YOU’RE EXPOSING ALL OF MY SECRETSSSSS

╰┈➤ percyjacks: sweetheart…you’re about as secretive as piper is straight

╰┈➤ yn.ln: HEY

lieutenant.thal: new moon = thalia visits day, hand over my girl

╰┈➤ percyjacks: im sorry, WHOSE girl???

╰┈➤ lieutenant.thal: did i stutter?

annabethc: those cookies in the second pic were bomb asf, you’re welcome

╰┈➤ yn.ln: make more beth, im begging 🙏🙏

neeks._: i’ve quite literally seen her try and bite people’s fingers off before

╰┈➤ percyjacks: what’s your point? 😒

╰┈➤ neeks._: oh there isn’t one im js sayin

gracefully.jason: she’s pretty, but where’s my man percy at?

╰┈➤ yn.ln: you mean MY man. i will hunt you down, grace

╰┈➤ percyjacks: she’s so sweet 🥰

…now playing: tek it — cafuné

yn.ln: the peeta to my katniss 🤍🏹

tagged: percyjacks

view all comments

lieutenant.thal: babe it’s not too late to join 🙏🙏

╰┈➤ percyjacks: yn block her PLEASE

╰┈➤ yn.ln: no to both of you 🤍

hazel_lev: YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTIE TOOTIE

╰┈➤ yn.ln: JSJSKSK ILY HAZE <33

percyjacks: idk who this peeta guy is but i think i look pretty damn good 😮‍💨

╰┈➤ yn.ln: look, i love you but don’t disrespect peeta mellark like that

piedpiper: you guys are cut but im gonna throw up next time im within a 3 mile radius omg

╰┈➤ team.leo: this is how we all feel when you and annabeth are all over each other btw!

╰┈➤ annabethc: you’re just mad because you can’t get a girl

╰┈➤ piedpiper: GET HIS ASS BABY 🗣️ (suck it, valdez)

gracefully.jason: idk what tf bread and cats have to do with this post but go yn 🙌

╰┈➤ yn.ln: …

╰┈➤ percyjacks: jason… bro

╰┈➤ yn.ln: i have never sighed so hard at a comment before in my life

reyna.ara: gods, i love it when his face is hidden & all i can see is you, you’re so gorgeous bae <3

╰┈➤ yn.ln: stawwwwwp 🤭

╰┈➤ pecyjacks: yeah. stop.

╰┈➤ reyna.ara: percy. three’s a crowd.

thegoat_: it’s so unfortunate to say but i took two thirds of these pictures

╰┈➤ yn.ln: grover do NOT act like i dont take cutie pics of you & juniper ☹️( reminder: 🏹)

╰┈➤ thegoat_: you are absolutely right, pretend I didn’t say anything (pls but the bow down)

percyjacks: gods, i love you 🩵

╰┈➤ yn.ln: i love you too, seaweed brain 🤎

[dreamertf]

Follow the Instructions

/hello! Hope you enjoy this one, im gonna start tagging ai as #ai tf so if you dont want to see any ai images in your tfs you can block that tag. Ill also be putting a disclaimer at the top of each post that has ai.

/contains ai images & video

/includes; muscle growth, suggestion tf, straight to gay tf

"Yeah, Im feeling fine!"

Jason was tired of how weak and scrawny his best friend Max stayed throughout their time in high school and now, college. So he had given Max a new black market roid that promised to "make him a bro." He crushed up a few of the pills without looking at the instructions and baked it into a cookie he gave Max.

Jason wasn't so bad himself, 6'4" and muscular, with a charming face. Little did he know that his height that he had since he was a sophmore in highschool would be changing.

Jason stared at Max as his skin started to ripple and shift.

"Are you sure?"

"Never better, bro."

Max ripped his shirt off as his muscles swelled. A deep canyon of rippling abs leading up to two giant slabs of muscle. He flexed and stretched as his biceps filled out.

"Sorry, im feeling a little hot." Max said non chalantly. His muscles continued to grow as he flexed them.

"Oh my god it worked"

"What worked?"

"Oh nothing, dont worry about it."

"Ok brah"

Their surrounds changed from school as it turned into a living room, a living room Jason had been in so many times before, Max's living room. All of a sudden, Jason felt a pull towards Max. He couldn't stop looking at him, like literally. He traced Max's outline as each muscle became more prominent. He stared at the giant as he grew taller and taller, but something wasn't right. It was like everything around Jason was getting taller too.

Unfortunately, Jason hadn't looked into how the roid actually worked. On the back of the small blue box, it read ;

Are you tired of being weak and nerdy? We got you covered. We believe the human mind is a powerful tool, and our Bro Pill helps you to use it to your full potential! Not only does it shift your mindset to be more focused on sports and the bros, but it also changes various other aspects of your life in order to fit your new you! We recommend taking one pill weekly until desired affects.

WARNING: taking more than one pill a week may intensify the effect you have on other people

Jason panicked as he felt himself losing muscle and height. His features softened as he turned from a rugged man into a young 20 something twink. It looks like the god of Jason's creation has type cast him as his twinky boyfriend. Making Max a jock apparently didn't override his sexuality.

"What are you doing to me?"

His voice was still deep, too deep for someone like him.

"Make that voice a little higher, and can you please quit being so worried brah? Be like me, stop thinkin as much little guy huhuhu."

A wave of relief came over Jason as he collapsed onto the couch. His body continued to shrink as he lost his height, becoming about 5'6" compared to Max's new 6'8". His musculature toned down more, not as defined anymore.

"Whatever you say babe" Jason giggled, his voice much higher and more flamboyant.

"Thats my pretty boy." Conversely, Max's voice became much deeper and demanding. Jason felt himself starting to get hornier.

"I'm so happy i couldfind you. Your ass was like made for my dick huhuhu" Max said as he spread his legs wide as his pouch grew bigger. He had one more explosive growth as his shoulder broadened and his pecs filled out more. Jason shifted in his seat as his ass grew more plump and muscular.

"What do you mean?" Jason feigned innocence, turning the ditziness all the way up.

"Come here and I'll show you, slut."

[marlenesluv]

Keep It Private. Part 2. (DR)

summary: just some more of you and daniel not being able to keep it in your pants on instagram

warnings: suggestive content

note: i wasn’t gonna make a part 2, but my posts have been getting a lot of love (thank you sm) and you guys seemed to rly like this one! <3 (still trying to reply to comments, but j know i see them all!)

masterlist here -> masterlist link

^ check my list for part 1! ^

liked by: y/n.ricciardo, charles_leclerc, and 1,891,034 others

tagged: y/n.ricciardo

danielricciardo: big win today in the australian grand prix race. thank you to my team, my fans, my friends, family, and pit crew. but i couldn’t have done it without my wife @y/n.ricciardo. i will be giving you so many orgasms later, and many reasons to have you not stand straight. i love you, my lucky charm❤️

view comments…

oscarpiastri: omg daniel, seriously?

|> danielricciardo: yeah😊

f1fanpage: do i say that they are cute? or disgusting for the pda?….

wagsoff1: congratulations, daniel!!

|> y/nanddanfp: you’re skipping over the whole last part…?

|> wagsoff1: trying to pretend i didn’t read it

maxverstappen1: congratulations, daniel!!

|> danielricciardo: thank you! 😁

y/n.ricciardo: daniel omg my mom follows you now😳

|> danielricciardo: i blocked her, she follows my family one though. its okay😊

|> y/n.ricciardo: oh okay. i love youuu

|> danielricciardo: i love you tooo❤️

|> landonorris: it’s almost like you guys don’t have messages to say this to each other?

_______________________________________________

liked by: danielricciardo, lilymhe, and 1,037,956 others

y/n.ricciardo: workout or workout..?🤭

view comments…

francisca.cgomes: you look stunning!💓🫶

|> y/n.ricciardo: thank you kika🥹🫶

f1wags: GOOD LORD THE CAPTION Y/N

danielricciardo: i prefer the second one

|> y/n.ricciardo: what a coincidence! me too!!

|> danielricciardo: im coming home so we can workout rn

|> y/n.ricciardo: YAY

f1updates: you GUYS😳

georgerussell63: the only couple i know without a filter

|> carmenmmundt: they make it work, they’re hot

|> y/n.ricciardo: ily carmen

|> carmenmmundt: ily too babe

_______________________________________________

Daniels BeReal (friends/grid only):

Caption: How mad would she be if i ate her out even tho she’s working?

Reactions:

Comments:

Lando Norris -> dude….

Charles Leclerc -> on the plane??

|> Daniel Ricciardo -> yeah? so?

|> Charles Leclerc -> seems a bit unsanitary

Carlos Sainz -> what the fuck

Pierre Gasly -> get it, daniel!

|> Daniel Ricciardo -> pierreeeeee

Max Verstappen -> i’m not sure what to say.

_______________________________________________

liked by: danielricciardo, landonorris, and 1,200,248 others

y/n.ricciardo: congratulations, baby. p1 in australia, our beautiful home country. couldn’t have asked for a better way to celebrate your win ❤️

view comments…

lilymhe: such an adorable couple, congrats daniel!

|> pierregasly: congratulations, daniel !!!

|> danielricciardo: thank you lily, and thank you pierre! congrats on p2 my man

|> pierregasly: YEAHHHH thanks daniel 🙏

f1wags: my couple goals and inspo

danielricciardo: the real win was making you my wife ❤️

|> y/n.ricciardo: damn straight it was

|> danielricciardo: excuse me? you’re gonna regret that miss

|> y/n.ricciardo: WAIT JK JK

|> danielricciardo: mhmm

formula1updates: congratulations on p1, daniel!!!

y/n.fans: parents are slaying tonight

_______________________________________________

liked by: y/n.ricciardo, arthur_leclerc, and 2,473,815 others

danielricciardo: happy anniversary to the love of my life, my partner, and my favorite person in the world. i don’t know how i would live without you. i love you, and i cant wait to spend the rest of our lives together❤️

view comments…

charles_leclerc: happy anniversary, guys!

|> danielricciardo: thank you, charles!

fanpage.f1: awwwww, happy anniversary🥹

landonorris: happy anniversary, mom and dad☺️

|> y/n.ricciardo: lando🙃🙃

|> danielricciardo: don’t give her baby fever

|> y/n.ricciardo: too late

|> danielricciardo: wanna make one?

*liked by y/n.ricciardo*

georgerussell63: happy anniversary, you two!

|> danielricciardo: thank you!

f1fan: i cant believe you guys have been together for four years already

|> wagsof.f1: four married and eight total with their dating ����🥹

y/n.ricciardo: i love you so much❤️❤️

|> danielricciardo: i love you so much too❤️❤️

_______________________________________________

liked by: danielricciardo, carmenmmundt, and 2,013,284 others

y/n.ricciardo: four years ago, you proposed to me while we were at dinner with your friends…translation: four years ago, you made me the happiest, luckiest, and the most loved person in the universe. i cant believe that i’m able to say you’re mine. and now i present my lockscreen for these past four years. i love you more than words can explain, my love❤️

view comments…

pierregasly: i remember that

|> maxverstappen1: yeah, never thought he would propose

|> carlossainz55: it did take him a while

y/nsfans: the lockscreen picture🥹 we finally know what it is. i can now live in peace

wagsf1: you guys don’t get it, im obsessed with this couple

lilymhe: congratulations!! you guys are perfect for each other💓

|> y/n.ricciardo: thank you, lily🥹💓

danielricciardo: i love you so much, thank you for sticking by my side

|> y/n.ricciardo: 🥹🥹🥹

|> danielricciardo: don’t cry, we haven’t had sex yet you can’t cry

|> oscarpiastri: they can’t even stop on anniversary pictures

_______________________________________________

(reposts, comments, and likes are appreciated!^-^)

[povlnfour]

ੈ✩‧₊˚ PADDOCK TO PADDOCK (LN) PART 8

series masterlist | previous part

lando norris x fem!horse rider!reader

landonorris just posted a photo ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and 207,567 others

landonorris 100th race, p2, and a nice little call with my girl to show off her flexibility. thank you austin

view all comments

user3 ‘MY GIRL’🥹🥹🥹

user7 I KNEWWW EVERYTHING WOULD BE OKAY

user9 lando have you seen what she’s done?

landonorris have friends? yeah pretty happy for her tbh

charles_leclerc p2 because the fia hates lewis and me*

user2 see everyone the boys are fine

landonorris keep crying mate

yourusername i actually hate you so bad rn

yourusername @/charles_leclerc SURE you don’t wanna date me instead?

user1 HELP Y/N AJDJDJSJ

user6 she said i’ve had ENOUGH

charles_leclerc make me that rice dish again and i’ll consider it

landonorris @/charles_leclerc you don’t even know what tteokbokki is called you don’t deserve her😤

yourusername just posted a photo ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by landonorris, lilymhe and 200,087 others

yourusername from monaco with love

👤 tagged alex_albon, lilymhe, charles_leclerc

only people yourusername follows can comment

alex_albon we need to have a serious conversation about how cute lily always looks in the photos you take and yet…. me…

lilymhe that’s just your face baby

charles_leclerc he’s not gonna know what hit him🤫

yourusername you could not have made this sound worse

charles_leclerc i’m quite enjoying being an accessory to internet drama

lilymhe do you know what’s rude? you spend one (1) second with a man and get a dating rumour… yet NOTHING when you hang w me!

yourusername FR we’ve been married for two years atp🙄

landonorris i know a Better place in monaco you can visit🧡

yourusername get your cute butt home and show me then

texts with charles ੈ✩‧₊˚

y/nupdates just posted a photo ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by landonorris and 10,397 others

y/nupdates y/n at the airport today!! it seems she’s flying out to mexico for the upcoming grand prix 🩷

view all comments

user9 seriously? has everyone just forgotten she’s a cheater?

user3 and yet you follow fan accounts of her??? get a life

user7 ur actually miserable. lando hates u.

this comment has been hidden by the author

y/nupdates any unnecessary hate comments will be deleted and you will be blocked🩷

user8 she’s so pretty even in the rain :( and she stopped to take photos with fans

user1 apparently someone gave her a necklace with an L on it and she put it straight on🥹

user8 @/user1 YOURE KIDDING THATS SO CUTE IM GONNA CRY

user1 THEY GAVE HER A MATCHING BRACELET FOR LANDO WITH HER INITIALS ON AS WELL!!!!

landonorris thank you admin for giving me a new lockscreen

user2 OH MY GOD ADMIN

y/nupdates 🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣 YOU ARE SO WELCOME

landonorris just tweeted ੈ✩‧₊˚

tweet 4 should finish: hate towards those close to me*

tweet 6 should finish: blocked by my team**

twitter reacts ੈ✩‧₊˚

mclaren just posted a photo ੈ✩‧₊˚

liked by yourusername and 165,407 others

mclaren from p17-p5. not the start to the weekend he wanted but he only went and turned it around🙌🏻

view all comments

user2 SO PROUDDDS

user9 all because of her….

user3 HAVE FUN GETTING BLOCKED LMAO

this comment has been hidden by the author

user6 GUYS I THINK MCLAREN ACTUALLY BLOCKED THEM THE COMMENT ISNT SHOWING UP FOR ME LMAOOO

yourusername that’s my boy

mclaren we heard it had something to do with his lucky charm😉

user3 this isn’t taking a week off ma’am

yourusername had to support the boy. it starts now <3

y/nupdates just tweeted ੈ✩‧₊˚

a/n:

OKAY this part was boring i am very sorry BUT there is onE OFFICIAL PART LEFT. it’ll be a long one i warn now but then there may be a mini epilogue of stuff i fully made up for next summer xxxx

thank you all for coming on this crazy ride with me — sorry it’s aLL OVER THE PLACE atm but it makes sense in my head ok

charles au is also otw next week and a one shot lando smau

taglist (found in pinned post): @idkiwantchocolatee @vellicoranorca @alessioayla @bborra @crimeshowjunkie @minkyungseokie @paolexsstuff @celestialpato @champagnelovers101 @loxbbg @hobiismyhopeu @tsukishitm-a @moonypixel @champagneproblems17 @ironmaiden1313 @lqvesoph @sunflower-golden-vol6 @six-call

[shuckinbeanz]

warnings/notes: Tumblr decided to post this incomplete so I had to finagle it lmfao kudos to Google lens for copying the majority of this and saving me some grief. n don worry ur secrets w me nonny! 🥰 N E WAYZ 🥵 NSFW, I'm gonna say y'all are married here, Daddy kink, chubby gn reader, stretchmarks, squirting+overstim, standing full nelson, breeding kink if u squint, reader can get pregnant, Kats is so mean to you ab your insecurities (in a good way i promise) so degradation, dirty talk, teensy bit of thigh worship(partly me indulging myself bc i have thicc ones), some orgasm denial, praise kink with a little bit of humiliation kink if u squint, biting? soft nibbling more like, n mirror sex. Told in his POV kinda bc who doesn't love a King who's head over heels for his s/o--it gets wonky at some point im sorry 😭

I'M FINALLY DOONE 😭😭

~Masterlist~

MINORS 👏 DNI! 👏 AGE 👏 IN 👏 BIO 👏 OR 👏 DNI! 👏 Head on over to @candybowbeansies please for my SFW pieces, or be blocked if you interact here! 😇

Tags: @dynamightsdaydream

You were doing it again. Prodding at the dips of your stretch marks morosely. And quite frankly it was pissing him off. He knew that look from ten miles away. He knew what your deep sigh meant, and he'd be damned if you do it again. Having enough of glaring daggers your way because you stubbornly kept your current mindset-one insecurity after the other-he resorted to picking you up, princess style.

"Kats!" you gasp, your rambling about how heavy you were going in one ear and out the other as he carried you straight to the bedroom with one thing on his mind; dealing with your insecurities the best way he knows how, by fucking them out of you.

"I'm a Pro, sweetheart. Carrying ten of ya is an everyday thing for me, so nice try, dumbass." he throws you onto the comforters, making you squeal in surprise.

You huff and squint at him as you sit upright, glaring your cute little glare as he readies the mirror. "What are you doing?" you finally ask, offended he brought you into its reflection to the point of near tears. "I'm huge," you start as he makes the strides towards you, "I'm ugly, I don't wanna see m'smff--" cutting you off by firmly planting his palm under your chin and squishing your pretty cheeks. Your pretty hues go wide, your pupils dilating at his stern look, a flush painting your features.

You were gonna get punished.

"We'll see how long you keep this up. Stop being a fuckin' brat." he gives you a meaningful squeeze before releasing you. "Now strip." he commands, and you shake your head before opening your mouth to speak.

"Strip, or that's another one to the dumpster." he seethes, eyeing what you wore as he settled beside you. You wisely clamp your mouth shut, immediately springing into action, knowing his habit of ripping your favorite clothes to shreds. While the money he makes can fill your closet with new ones, you preferred the ones you've worn down.  "Not so hard, now, is it, sweetheart?" he rasps warmly, a stark contrast to his earlier demeanor. "Now, c'mere." he coos, beckoning you over when you've removed the last article of clothing, and you disobediently stay where you are. "Don't make Daddy say it twice, toots." he warns you, making your breath hitch as you squirm in place.

Katsuki is a patient man for his spouse. After several moments you eventually begin to cave, and you inch towards him. He pats his lap, watching you fiddle with your fingers apprehensively. "What did I say?" a growl escapes him, and you begin to stutter, your beautiful face much more lurid in hue; of embarrassment, shame, and arousal.

"Y-Yes, Daddy..." a meek affirmation escapes you as you turn around and hesitantly take your seat, gasping as he all but grabs them plump, pretty hips, and pulls them down onto his lap.

He purrs in satisfaction, his large hands engulfing your plush thighs. "There we go. Atta sweetheart." he praises, groping and massaging them. "I wouldn't've married ya if I didn't like everything you had to offer." he starts. "You know me, sweetheart, yeah?" giving them a particularly firm squeeze. "Yeah?" he repeats firmly when you hesitate, his voice making you nod.

"The juicier, the better." he says, pressing them together. "Press these babies t'gether after a li'l TLC, makes a mighty fine cocksleeve. Nice and slippery, drives me up the wall every damn time, never fuckin' fails." he rasps in your ear, making you squirm. "And here?" he lifts one of his hands to grope your stomach, making you jolt. "Here, I stake my fuckin' claim." "Kats--" "Would prefer t'do it inside, turn you into my pretty li'l cumdump, keep you stuffed full of my kids." he interrupts you, thumbing up your inner thigh, stopping just short of your sex.

He revels in your whimper, in the flush that grew to the tips of your ears and down your neck, creeping towards your shoulders. "Can turn 'em info earmuffs, too." he squeezes your thigh, the hand on your stomach traveling up to fondle your chest.

"These here are just the cherry on top, sweetheart." he says, flicking one of your nipples, making you gasp. He scoots back, holding onto you to keep you in his lap. "See that mirror? I'll have ya yellin' how pretty you are by the end of this, and that's a fuckin' promise. Daddy doesn't go back on his promises." he tells you as he manhandles you into a more comfortable position with ease, paying special attention to groping at your tummy and thighs-the areas you were most insecure about.

He'd have those thoughts long gone before he's done with you, your pretty little head filled only with him.

He takes your hands, first guiding them to your plump pretty rolls. "Remember what I tell ya?" he asks, as he guides your hands lovingly across your body. Incoherent sounds escape you, and he hums encouragingly. "Little louder, toots." he tells you. You're silent for several moments, shyly speaking up.

"...like cinnamon rolls..." your voice comes out small as you lift your gaze to yours and his reflection in the mirror, cheeks painted the prettiest color. "Mmhm, and?" he rasps coaxingly in your ear.

"Y'could...gobble 'em up..." you go redder as his crimson eyes meet yours in the reflection, your own hues darting downward. "Damn right." he chuckles, giving a playful nibble to your neck, eliciting a soft gasp and shudder from you. "Can't convince me that's not what those bastards are fantasizin' when they stare at'cha a little bit too fuckin' long. Really pisses me off." he growls, "I like watchin' 'em bounce, too. They're for my eyes, only, yeah?" he tells you.

It was true. The hungry gazes you'd get from thirsty passerby was far from being a rarity or occasional, not that you didn't like it though. Your guard dog of a husband's protectiveness always did set a fire in your belly.

"And these?" he inquires, his large hands moving to your thighs, guiding them apart-but you stubbornly keep quiet. He bends, chuckling darkly. "Take your time, baby." he tells you, mouthing at your neck, his crimson hues dark and knowing. You try to avert your gaze, but one of his big calloused hands grips your chin, making you look back at the reflection, his other toying with your pulsing sex.

You wouldn't be able to keep it up much longer.

"Earmuffs..." you mumble shyly, trying to remember through the haze. "Th'juicier--th'better--" you gasp, unable to keep from squirming anymore as his finger teases your entrance. "Mhmm, and?" he encourages you, his voice husky in your ear.

"Ahh--oohh, Daddy, m'sorry--" you barely contain your moans, wriggling your hips a little, wanting nothing more than those thick fingers to fill you up.

“Don't be.” he tells you, his voice clear through the pulsing heat, “Don't be, baby.” he soothes. “From the crown of your head, down to your pretty little toes. Every fuckin’ inch, gorgeous.” he tells you, inserting one finger.

“Ya like t’keep spoutin’ nonsense, about perfection, about who's deservin’ of what.” in goes another as he continues-really, he’s too perfect for you-curling his fingers only just a tad, not quite enough to quell the fire.

“This whole damn planet don't deserve you.” he moves his hand, fingers pulling out in a slow drag, curled up against your spongy spots, “You know damn well y'can't convince me otherwise, sweets.” he whispers in your ear. You moan at the sudden onslaught; large calloused fingers pumping in and out of your heat at a dizzying pace, his palm rubbing against your sex deliciously.

You find rhythm with him, bringing your hips up for more, wantonly humping his hand. It's not long before your husband's skillful fingers are coated with your slick, and your teetering on the brink of orgasm.

He knew exactly how to drive you crazy. His voice in your ear, the strong grip he had on your chin. His skillful fingers bringing you up, and up, and up-only to suddenly stop.

You whine and squirm, reaching down to get that high, only for your hands to be swat away, his large palm covering your pulsing heat. "What'd I say, baby?" he pants in your ear, voice husky. He was clearly enjoying this. You could feel his hard cock straining against his sweatpants, pressing up against the meat of your ass.

And if you were going to be honest, you were enjoying this, too.

"Daaaddddyyy~" you whine, high pitched and desperate, closing your legs. "Nuh-uh." he grunts, pulling one of your legs in the hook of his elbow. "What'd I say, toots?" he asks again.

"I'm big, an' ug-ghoooh!~" you try, with a hint of squirmy sass, quickly cut off by his fingers plunging into your needy heat again. "Nope. Wrong answer." he growls.

You keen his name, legs trembling as he ravages your spongy bits, knuckle deep. He slows to a drag just as you're about to reach your high. "Last time, what'd I say...?" he rasps in your ear. You squirm and hump his hand as best you can, face hot and head fogging over, frustrated tears starting to prick your eyes.

Adamantly, you try to shake your head with him holding your chin, squeezing your eyes shut so you wouldn't have to look at yourself in the mirror anymore.

Because he's convinced you, like all other times. You're perfect. At this point, you were only being stubborn, but you refused to admit it easily.

The moment his fingers leave your heat, though; all that crumbles. "Nooo!~" you release a high pitched whine. It crashes and burns, your sweet, sweet release seeming even further away.

" 'm pretty! 'm hot! 'm sexy, I--" your voice cuts off as he eases his thick fingers back in, where you needed them most. "What else, toots?" he asks, voice husky. "Got sexy curves!~ Thick n' warm n' jiggly!~ Oohh, yes, Daddy please, right there!~" you keen as his skillful fingers pick up the pace, scissoring you open. "Keep going." he commands you.

" 'm thighs!~ Stretchmarks, too, they--they look, oh fuck, Daddy, Daddy, 'm coming!~" you squirt all over his palm, shaking your hips against his hand as best you could, riding your high.

You go completely limp against him, panting harshly. Slowly, sensually, you feel that same hand travel around the curve of your ass and up your thigh.

When you feel him reach behind you, between your bodies, and pull down his sweats, you can't help the pleasant shudder that escapes you.

"Daddy, 'm legs're jelly, I can't--" you try weakly, but he shushes you. "There's positions for that, sweetheart." he pants softly in your ear as he manhandles you into position to take his throbbing, red-hot cock.

Your toes curl in delight at the stretch, his cock all but filling you up. He pulls you into a full nelson, "Daaadddyyyyyy!~" you squeal in surprise when he stands, impaling you just right, making your hole gush.

"Didn't tell ya t'stop, did I?" his hisses hotly in your ear. "Nhooh~" you moan. "Touch yourself." he commands, and this time, he doesn't have to tell you twice; you snake your hand in front of you and start stroking. "Wanna hear your pretty voice, c'mon." he grunts, his strong arms keeping you fully secure as he proceeds to use you like a pocket pussy.

"Dad~dy~ I'm!~"

You sing hot praise to yourself in the mirror, getting lost in your own little world as your husband bounces you on his fat cock, encouraged by his lewd praises. This goes on until you're fucked stupid-until he's made you cum at least twice all over the mirror.

Only then would he have mercy, cleaning you up and tucking you in.

The next time you'd wake up, he'd already have your favorites prepared. Really, he's such the perfect husband for you. <3

[bloopitynoot]

Reading SVSSS: Chapter 16

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

Hello! Another day, another chapter!

I really don't have much to ramble about today, but I am back on my tea. This is a new one from the ren faire this year- vanilla chai with sugar and milk. The cup is from the same ren faire (but purchased last year).

let's go let's let's go- I am already impatient to get into this chapter.

Last chapter we ended on a cliffhanger with Luo Binghe totally unconscious- we start this chapter with Shen QIngqiu ready to rescue his man and escape!

It's really so upsetting that he is going back to trash (two bar) spiritually energy in this body when he was so used to his mushroom Unlimited Power p65

RIP Luo Binghe's skull LOL he is really being tossed around like a rag doll. SQQ needs to be more careful. p66

MXTX said forget the only one bed trope, I raise you -> There Was Only One Coffin p67

Fuck. This is actually so scary 10/10 I would pee myself if a little skeletal arm was worming it's way into the coffin I was temporarily occupying (really anything in this book's reality would make me die of fright. as an aside I was talking to my partner about this while watching MDZS donghua yesterday, in the world of cultivators I would be a dumpling stall owner. I could never with the sword training and literal corpses). pp67-68

I CANT 'extenuating circumstances'. SQQ definitely: I just HAD to kiss his cute little forehead to save our lives. p68

i'm crying LOL "a person's abdomen is supposed to be the softest spot on their body, but Luo Binghe's was uncomfortably hard against Shen Qingqiu's stomach. The farther down he pulled him, the more he was sure that Luo Binghe had an eight-pack. Was that a rock slab down there?" p70

this keeps getting worse LMAO

OOOOO Meng Mo is back! Is it weird that I kind of love this guy? He has such a cool power and is a bit of a dick, but in the best and worst of ways. Him and Airplane give similar energy and I am not mad about it. p72

oh gosh! LBH is either "fatally ill" or "close to death" p72

wait- adding to the above point. he could also be mentally very unwell :( poor buddy -> it's likely this option. p72

so even though SQQ is processing nothing , I think SQQ admitting (not naming the feeling but admitting) that he is feeling a mess of emotions about Luo Binghe is a big step for him! p73

Meng Mo seems to have a lot of feelings about LBH. I am not sure if it's just pride or what but whatever it is he is correct here, "The way this elder sees it, he (LBH) should either kill you (SQQ) or do you!" p74

PLEASE OH NO

I AM WHEEZING

+1000 Protagonist Satisfaction Points for touching LBH's "Heavenly Pillar" p76

IM DYING OH NO

WHY IS THIS EVEN A THOUGHT IF HE THINKS HE'S STRAIGHT "He couldn't exactly help Luo Binghe jerk off under these circumstances, right?!" p76 But like if not these circumstances he is cool with doing it in other circumstances???????????

oh no! SQQ blocking the blades with his bare hand for LBH p79

Dang. the Old Palace Master has been through some shit. p80

Are we getting more of Shen jiu's story??? We have Qiu Haitang here too! p81 (just as an aside because my notes did not revisit this, we do not get more of his story just weird little hints. That I hope Shang Qinghua clears up later). p81

What a terrible combo. Old Palace master is just butthurt Luo Binghe doesn't want him as a teacher or to marry his daughter and Qiu Haitang seems to be just a vile woman with a grudge against SQQ for some reason. pp82-83

Okay but as horrible as OPM is, that cultivation he's doing with his voice is kind of cool. p85

Wait. Did the Old Palace Master have a thing for Su Xiyan? This is so fucking weird for LBH and he's not even conscious pp86-87

reading further the above point got so much worse omg :(((((((((((( I'm so upset for Su Xiyun. p87

It got even worse with the implications of what it meant for Luo Binghe in that sect. That terrible terrible man deserved that horrifying death. Fuck that guy! pp 89-90

OMG SQQ, basically half dead carrying LBH, barely got away from the death flower room, and here we have Tianglang-jun back on his bullshit. p94

SQQ is in such a bad state :o pp94-95

Is this another dime??? Our demon blood piggy bank for SQQ is now at $0.40 p97

YAY! Luo Binghe is awake! (is he going to be okay mentally though??)p 99

Why is Luo Binghe so mad? Like this man just nearly died trying to get you the fuck out of there p100

Fucking finally okay, it got better LBH is realizing what SQQ did while he was unconscious pp102-103

I'm glad they cleared that up (even though there was the other added miscommunication about LBH thinking SQQ was crying when he was actually just in a fuck ton of pain). p104

I am actually so glad that the discussion was interrupted before LBH found out about the dick touching being real LOL p108

MORE DEMON BLOOD. -> SQQ's dime bank is at $0.50

How many times does this man get kidnapped?

We really ended with him being kidnapped again and with Luo Binghe being conned by his own dad. That was so rough. -500 dignity points (not really but it sure feels like it)

[saccgiriangel]

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[total-killer-brainrot]

Remote Broadcast

You felt the cold wrap around your wrists and tug them to your sides. And finally you got a glimpse of who was messing with you. Tendrils of darkness holding your arms tight, just below the tablecloth. And grinning up at you between your legs, a large smile amidst inky shadow.

---

Amidst one of Charlie's mind numbing lesson plans, you get a big surprise hiding under the dinner table.

---

i love this stinky swamp man so much and i love the thought of his shadow basically manifesting any and all horny desires and occasionally acting on them despite his best efforts.

i am fully aware that hes canonically aroace, but fuck it im horny i wanna write horny shit

---

All my fics are also on AO3

Not Beta Read. Rating: Explicit. Length: 1,303. Ship: Alastor x You. Fem!Reader. Tags: Mildly Dubious Consent, Groping, Exhibitionism, Public Humiliation, Public Sex, Restraints, Tentacles, Vaginal Fingering, Cunnilingus, Embarrassment, Multiple Orgasms

---

The logic behind today’s lesson plan escaped you. Charlie seemed to think that proper table manners and dining etiquette would surely land each participating sinner a spot in Heaven. Like you, most of the Hotel’s residences were less than enthusiastic. But still, why bother trying to redeem your damned soul if you were going to refuse to get involved with all of Charlie’s ideas.

By now the Hotel boasted over twenty willing sinners. Most of which had no clue how to properly hold a butter knife, let alone know the difference between a fish fork and a salad fork. A handful of the volunteers from Cannibal Town were actually well educated in the practices of fine dining, despite their usual methods of messy eating. And they were more than happy to assist Charlie’s lesson. Including the Hotel’s resident facilities manager, the Radio Demon himself, who sat near the head of the table with Charlie and Vaggie. 

Halfway through the lesson and you were bored out of your mind. Picking at your food while Charlie attempted to instruct a particularly violent demon on how to use the fork without breaking the fine china. Most of the other residents were chatting quietly amongst themselves as they ate. It wasn’t often the whole Hotel got together to eat and talk casually. And most seemed to be enjoying themselves. You continued to pick at your food until you felt something brush your leg.

You frowned and leaned back in your chair to look down, unable to spot anything in the shadow. You assumed one of the people seated next to you, or perhaps even Angel Dust seated across the table, must have nudged your leg accidentally. And then you felt it again. An icy cold slither up the back of your calf. You glared at Angel, sure he was pulling some kind of joke. But he wasn’t laughing, lost in his own conversation with Husk next to him. You glanced at the other sinners near you, but no one seemed to be paying you any mind. 

A shudder ran through you as the thing at your feet touched you again, reaching the hem of your skirt and pushing it up slowly. You leaned back further, but still couldn’t see anything. Just inky darkness below the table cloth. Too dark to simply be the shadow of the table. Quickly sitting up straight and going very still when you felt cold fingers run over your clothed cunt. What the fuck was going on? 

This time the thing below you didn’t pull away. Exploring your pussy and inner thighs. You did your best to not show your reaction on your face. Whatever cruel joke someone was playing on you, they wouldn’t get the satisfaction of seeing you enjoy it in front of everyone. Though you did draw a few confused glances when a quiet gasp escaped you. Your mystery friend pressing down on your clit repeatedly. Your hands shot down between your legs. Pressing down on the chair below you and blocking the things access to your core. 

You felt the cold wrap around your wrists and tug them to your sides. And finally you got a glimpse of who was messing with you. Tendrils of darkness holding your arms tight, just below the tablecloth. And grinning up at you between your legs, a large smile amidst inky shadow. You’d seen this creature before. Always attached to its master. Your head shot up, looking towards the Radio Demon. He was sitting nearly at the opposite side of the table to you, but even from this distance you could see he was tense. His ever present grin strained as he stared straight ahead, brows furrowed. Not engaging in conversation, just dead focused on, well you knew what. 

Another shuddering gasp left you. The shadow having pulled your panties to the side and gaining full access to you. You refused to look down again, trying to remain calm, but you could feel a long, cold tongue on your clit as two fingers slipped inside you. You whimpered, as quietly as you could possibly manage. The stretch didn’t hurt, the combination of your own slick, and whatever substance the shadow was made of making its fingers slide in and out of you easily. It was slow, taking its time to explore every inch of you, inside and out.

Your gaze turned back to Alastor, and you were surprised to see his cheeks flushed bright red. You could see his claws digging into the edge of the table as he gripped it. And all of a sudden you weren’t so sure he was doing this on purpose. Did the shadow have a mind of its own?

Before you could stop it, a horribly loud whine escaped your mouth. Drawing everyone’s attention. You blushed dark, the fingers inside you stilling as everyone stared at you. Everyone except Alastor, who remained staring straight again. Embarrassment clawed up your throat and you stammered to explain yourself. 

“Oh yeah! That's what I’m talking about!” Angel Dust moaned across from you, leaning back in his chair as he mimicked your whine, though much louder and far more exaggerated. The table laughed along with him, before returning to their conversations. You frowned at Angel in confusion, but he simply just winked at you and returned to Husk.

You took in a deep breath, right as the shadow curled its fingers inside you. You squeezed your eyes shut and breathed through your nose, focusing on remaining still and quiet as it drew you closer and closer to your orgasm. The coldness of its being a stark contrast to your burning skin. 

Glancing once again at Alastor you could see how he was gritting his teeth. For a brief moment the shadow disappeared, not pulling away, simply fading out of existence. Before returning back full force. Seemingly intent on making you finish before Alastor dragged it away from its work. 

You clenched your fists and bit down on your bottom lip hard as you rolled your hips against the shadows fingers. Eyes fluttering shut as you felt your pleasure nearing its peak. Distantly you hear Angel talking louder, making lewd jokes and making sure the attention was off you as you tipped over the edge. Thighs trembling as your orgasm flowed over you. Each and every nerve on fire. The wonderful sensations quickly turned into overstimulation as the shadow continued its motions. You squirmed in your seat, struggling to get out of the tendril’s grip so you could push it away. It was hopeless. 

You had long since forgotten about keeping quiet. Far too distracted by the fingers and tongue driving you crazy. Right as you were being dragged towards your second orgasm, it all stopped. You whined needily and glanced down, the shadow was gone. Looking up in a daze you noticed so was everyone else. Except for Alastor. 

The tall demon stood from his chair, adjusting his coat and running a hand through his hair. He looked embarrassed almost. Avoiding your eye as he turned towards the door. You sat up slowly, watching him as he walked away from you. Still trembling and a little bit out of breath.

“Alastor. Don’t you dare fucking leave. I was just about to cum.”

He froze. And you grinned as the room around you darkened. The length of the shadow crawling up the wall, grin spreading across its dark face. You felt another tentacle of darkness wrap around your waist and lift you out of the chair. 

The door in front of Alastor opened and Angel Dust stuck his head in.

“Hey I got everyone to leave and- oh! Well I’ll leave you to it.” He laughed, watching you be maneuvered by Alastor’s shadows before leaving the two of you alone once again.

[quin-ns]

Taking Care (Saul Goodman x Reader)

Word count: 2K

Summary: after jesse beats up saul you help fix him up

Tags: brba ep. 5x11, canon violence, canon behavior, blood mention, hurt/comfort kinda, hurt!saul, saul being a bit sleazy but it’s goofy it’s fine, fluff, flirting, humor/comedy, very light hearted despite the episode, kissing, happy end :)

A/N: finished breaking bad and couldn’t get this episode out of my brain. im a saul simp now and even tho he lowkey deserved it i didn’t like seeing him get beat up. my self indulgent fix it- idk how big the fandom for saul fics is so I’ll just have to see lol

Misc masterlist + main masterlist

As you headed into Saul’s office from the waiting room, you heard a commotion. Saul was screaming at someone. The door had been kicked in. You’d seen some pretty crazy things happen here, but you were in no way expecting to find Jesse being the cause of the chaos.

“Jesse! Stop!” you shouted, gaining the young man’s attention. He was standing over Saul—who was on the ground, hands raised in defense—with a gun pointed on the man.

Jesse stared at you in surprise, obviously not anticipating your arrival. His jaw tightened and he looked guilty. You were one of the only people left whose opinion of him actually mattered to Jesse. The two of you were friends; you could only hope he’d listen to you.

“Oh Y/N, thank god,” Saul said in relief when he spotted you in the room. “Call the police!”

You weren’t sure if he was serious or not—Saul never wanted police at his office—but it must’ve been bad if he was even willing to mention calling help.

“No need,” Jesse decided. He dug into Saul’s pocket and grabbed something out. Sounded like keys. “We’re done here,” he told you calmly. Huell, Saul’s massive bodyguard, tried to block the door. “Back up!” Jesse yelled, pointing the gun at him. You weren’t in the line of fire and you really hoped Jesse wouldn’t shoot you, but you stumbled back further away from him. Huell moved too and let Jesse out the door.

Huell ran over to Saul and tried to help him up. “Get off me! What do I pay you for?” Saul yelled at Huell and grabbed his phone. He frantically called someone and said, “hey, it’s me. We got a big problem.”

Huell ran off out the door and you turned to go after Jesse too. As much as he was deranged in the moment, you tried to convince yourself maybe you could help, but Saul interrupted your contemplation after making his call that you didn’t pay attention too.

“Leave him,” Saul coughed out. “He has a gun and is clearly not afraid to wave it around.” You looked back at him and became aware of the damage Jesse had done.

“Oh, you idiot,” you muttered, approaching Saul where he had slumped back to the ground. It was only the two of you in the office now. “What did you do?”

He let out a dramatic scoff. “Me?” Saul asked, offended, as you crouched down next to him. “I get assaulted and I’m somehow at fault?”

You took his bloody face in your hands and inspected the injuries. “Jesse wouldn’t beat you up for no reason.”

A guilty look crossed his face as your hands fell. “I’ll tell you about it later,” he grumbled reluctantly, sitting up straight. You weren’t sure if he ever would. “Can you help me out first, maybe?” Saul gestured to his face.

“Yeah,” you replied curtly, standing. You kept a first aid kit in your car. You were in a similar line of business to Mike and through him you met Saul (and Jesse, Walter, and Gus). Although, the only ones you became friends with were Jesse and Saul.

Your friendship with Saul was a little more… well, more complex. You had a good rapport with him and often bantered back and forth, flirting and what not.

You stopped by his office more than you probably should’ve and he was always pleased to see you appear. That’s how you thought today would go when you came by to visit. You had a couple minutes to spare so you figured you’d swing by for a few. He joked more than once that you could take up all his time in a day and he wouldn’t charge you a dime.

You went out and grabbed the kit from under your seat as quickly as you could. It was something you kept on hand given your past experiences in your occupation. And right now, it was about to come in handy.

Saul was standing when you walked in, looking around the room at the mess. His expression was defeated, which was only amplified by the cuts, bruises, and most of all the bloody nose.

“God, he did a number on you,” you commented, unable to hold back. You actually felt bad for him even though you weren’t sure whose fault it was—it looked like it hurt.

“I’m aware,” he replied, disgruntled, and dropped down into his chair.

You rounded the desk to his side with the kit and set it on the surface of it. You began to unpack the kit and set aside the things you needed. Saul watched you—your back was to him but you could feel his eyes on you.

The first thing you did was check his nose to make sure it wasn’t broken. Good news, it wasn’t. Just really, really bloody. And there was a cut on the bridge. You grabbed a packet of wipes and started to get to work.

You focused on wiping the blood away, but you noticed Saul’s eyes scanning your face. He was watching you almost transfixed. He had been quiet for a few seconds, which was longer than usual for him.

“If I knew I could get you this close I would’ve gotten my ass kicked sooner,” he finally spoke up in that sleazy manor you were so used to.

You scoffed out a laugh. “At least you’re not trying to say you won that.”

Blood was still dripping from his nose, layering onto what was already present, so you took care of that first. You cleaned it from his face which he groaned and whined about, but you wouldn’t have expected anything less.

“Don’t be such a baby,” you muttered.

You finished up with that and his nose finally stopped leaking fresh blood. It was a start, right? You threw bloody wipes away in a little desk side trash can and moved on.

You leaned in a little, glancing over the injuries. You dabbed at the cut on the bridge of his nose with one of those tiny square alcohol wipes.

Saul winced but recovered quickly.

“Are you gonna kiss it and make it better?” he teased while you rolled your eyes and reached for a band aid. “If so I think I might have a scratch on my lip.” You raised your brows with a look that said a sarcastic ‘really?’ “What? I—I thought it was a legitimate healing method.” The lie rolled so easily off his tongue you might’ve believed he believed it. Part of being a lawyer you assumed.

“You wouldn’t know what to do with yourself if I did,” you said offhandedly (baiting him), unwrapping the bandaid and placing it on the bridge of his nose.

“What?” Saul sounded incredibly offended. “I so would,” he argued.

Before he could get another word in, you grasped his face in each of your hands and leaned down to capture his lips. Saul, as expected, was stunned. You pulled back with a light laugh while he stared at you dumbfounded.

“See?” you said with sass and a smile. “Now can I finish?”

Saul nodded, speechless for the first time in… well, as long as you’d known him.

Now that his nose was taken care of, which is where the brunt of the damage was, you could focus on the more minor things. Like the eye that was probably going to be a tad swollen and the cut on his forehead.

“You’re taking such good care of me,” he mused. “I’m starting to think you like me.”

“Maybe I do,” you replied smoothly, not missing a beat as you worked.

“I want a do-over,” Saul announced, referring to the kiss where you’d very effectively proved your point.

You ignored him, except for biting back a small smile to yourself. “I can’t do anything about the eye and the cut on your forehead is so small it probably doesn’t need a bandaid. Unless you want one.”

“It’s fine,” Saul dismissed.

“Alright then,” you stepped back to look over him one more time. “You’re good to go.”

“Thanks,” he told you, but was already distracted by prodding at the bandaid.

“I only had a few minutes so I gotta head out now,” you told him as you packed up the first aid kit.

You closed it and grabbed it, then headed for the doorway. Saul realized you were leaving and furrowed his brows, trying to find something to say. You only made it about halfway before—

“Wait! A date!” Saul scrambled to stand, but recovered and tried to act casual. “A date. We should go on one,” he suggested. “Like, for real.”

There it was. Something you’d been waiting for for a while. You knew he had a thing for you beyond just provocative comments and flirting, it was obvious, but he never actually asked you out. So you didn’t plan on taking him up on any of his offers until he was serious. It took a while, but that moment finally came.

If you were mean, you would’ve said the punch knocked some sense into him.

“Sure,” you replied after a beat.

“Really?” He sounded surprised. “I mean, really?” he repeated, much more collected. “That’s great. Okay. So uh, how about dinner this Friday?”

“You sure you don’t have… other stuff going on?” you asked vaguely, but he knew exactly what you were referring to.

Saul flashed you that charming grin of his. “For you? I have all the time in the world.”

You couldn’t help but smile and let out a laugh at that. Sure he could be coquettish but you genuinely did enjoy his presence. Besides, it suited him. You couldn’t imagine Saul being a perfect, boring gentleman. The flirting was like a game with him and you liked to play just as much as he did.

“Do me a favor, though—”

“Anything,” he responded a little too quickly.

“—try and keep that handsome face intact, alright? No more bloody noses,” you requested with a sarcastic tone (though you did mean it). “If you and I go out I don’t want people thinking I beat you.”

Saul chuckled at your joke. “I’d let you,” he said lasciviously. Despite the wicked glint you were pretty sure he was joking. Although with Saul you could never be too sure.

You scoffed, but with a sense of humor. “I don’t think that’s the compliment you think it is.”

“Whatever,” he said with a shrug. Saul strolled towards you, going overboard with how leisurely he tried to be. You laughed to yourself when he stopped in front of you. The sound made him crack a smile of his own.

“Can I get my do-over?” Saul implored.

“Hmm,” you hummed. “No,” you said unseriously. You laughed at your own joke and Saul sensed your tone.

“You sure?” Saul placed a hand on your waist and decreased the distance. His other hand rose to your cheek. You looked into those soft blue eyes of his.

“Maybe not,” you sighed out as he was already closing the gap between your lips.

Saul initiated and you gladly reciprocated. This kiss, unlike before, was expected. And not to prove a point. You weren’t sure what you thought kissing him would be like, but it was nice. Good. He had you practically swooning by the time the two of you separated.

“I gotta go, but um,” you said softly, eyes lingering on his lips. “I’ll see you Friday?” You flicked your eyes up to meet his.

“How about seven? I’ll pick you up,” Saul offered with a lopsided smile.

You clicked your tongue. “But your car is so tacky,” you teased.

“Hey! My car is awesome,” he defended. “You’ll look great in the passenger side.” Saul patted your hip (nearly your ass) and shot you a wink.

“You better make this date worth my while.” You poked him in the chest, all teasing and accusing like, and stepped back. You turned on your heal and headed out of the office.

"I wouldn't dream of anything less!" Saul called after you. You could hear the smile on his face and for the rest of the day, nothing could get rid of the one on yours.

[im-a-luxury]

warning: absolutely delulu headcanon incoming (based on a convo i had w/ @sharonz-arty-corner03)

after the happenings of atsv calm down (and they will <- im insane) and miguel BEGS and GROVELS for forgiveness and everyone becomes a family again (AND THEY WILL <- even more insane), miguel totally becomes the dad that always has a child crawling over or hanging onto him. (more under the cut!!)

seeing that he’s 6’9 (in the movie atleast lmao) ~300 pounds, and built like a brick shithouse, the kids immediately go “oh so you’re a jungle gym”

he’s in a super important meeting? mayday’s climbing over his shoulders babbling. another meeting? pav is clamped to his back, interrupting the meeting with periodic snores and sleep-mumbles. the other meeting members bring it up and he glares them down.

he’s working? hobie is crawling over his shoulders and back and leaning over him and blocking miguel’s view of the screens with his hair and arms and hands. miguel tries to act annoyed but he’s just glad that hobie finally feels comfortable.

he’s talking with jess or peter b? miles and gwen are running around him, playing tag and using his hands and shoulders and back as vaulting platforms. or they’re just sitting on both his shoulders, holding a completely unrelated conversation. miguel keeps a perfectly straight face, but on the inside he’s grinning so widely.

he’s working in the lab with margo? they're leaning back to back, margo’s leaning over his shoulders and ducking under his arms to show him something or ask a question.

peni needs to get energy out? she’s using him a jungle gym, crawling over his shoulders and swinging over his arms and clambering up his back. her nails dig into his skin ever so often, and she nearly falls a couple times, but miguel just catches her and sets her up on his shoulder.

he’s reporting after a tiring mission? ben’s leaning against miguel’s WALL of a back, arms wrapped around his chest and face shoved into his shoulderblade. his breathing is steady, but he’s sagging against miguel’s back. eventually, miguel turns around and scoops him up in his arms.

he’s working on his platform (in his office that’s warmer than the rest of the building)? noir comes in, shivering slightly (you cannot tell me that boy has a core body temp above 20 degrees). he clambers up onto the platform, and shoves his forehead against miguel’s shoulder. he just swings an arm around the boy and pulls him into his side. noir falls asleep, and miguel picks him up, figuring a nap might be good for them.

just….miguel who gets to be a dad again man.

[sunshine-on-marz]

Pretty Girl

Wilbur x Reader

Feminine reader

Tw: body image issues and crying

“Will..” you whispered, sitting next to your boyfriend on the couch. “Yes love?” The brunette asked, looking towards you with a dashing smile. You give him a sad look and lean into his chest. “Oh what’s wrong honey?” He asked, wrapping his arms around your waist. “I don’t feel pretty Bub..” you mumble, tears welling up in your eyes. “Wh-“ he almost started on a tangent of calling you pretty and saying how dumb it is to think otherwise, but he knew getting frustrated would only make it worse. “Baby you’re gorgeous, even if you don’t see it, I see it.” He whispered, placing a kiss on your temple. “You have too say that though Will, we’re dating, that’s like- the whole thing” you sadly laughed. He sighed “well, I thought you were pretty before we dated” he retorted. You just burry your face in his chest, Wilbur began running his hands up and down your sides. “I love you, and you’re pretty nose, and your pretty eyes, and pretty lips, and those pretty hips and that pretty tummy and your pretty legs, your perfect back and jaw and hands, your soft hair and skin, god baby.. you’re a goddess”. You teared up some more, a few tears spilling down your cheeks. “Oh angel don’t cry” the man cooed as he wiped your cheeks. “T-thank you Wilbur” you really didn’t know what to say, this man was amazing to you. “You’re so welcome pretty girl” he whispered before placing a kiss on your lips.

——————

Guys this is so self indulgent- im so sorry- also my writers block and mental health and school and litterally everything has been so fucked.

I love you all so so so so much, thanks for sticking around, even when I don’t post for a month straight.

I genuinely don’t know what I’d do without this little community

Remember that you’re beautiful, and it’s ok to be insecure even if you don’t fit the criteria to be considered “ugly”

Bye lovies!!!

Tags: @kit-is-a-weeb @lillylvjy @jadeissues @curiouseris @m0thza

[lockandkeyhyena]

just wanna thank u for tagging mouthwashing bc holy crap people r not doing that and i am forced to see the gore bc i like their other content. never seen a community with any form of gore as a common focus left untagged like this. its so so frustrating i dont even care if people do the gore tw because i just blocked both tags (mouthwash, mouthwashing) so i can avoid it more easily. but ppl just straight up reblog that no tags and im like. Bro That Character Is Covered In Bandages That Don’t Fully Cover Their Massive, Severe Injuries. It Is Basically Gore.

sorry this turned into a rant. im just super freakin glad to see that there’s someone tagging it

aw man it sucks that people arent tagging it, sorry about that anon. im glad you can still enjoy my stuff cause i tag it though! i try my best to tag all stuff that might be upsetting/triggering