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carmenized-onions · 6 months ago

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chap pap 2 - electric boogaloo (well actually it’s about plumbing)

you ever start writing and you just cannot seem to find an end so you keep going forever? yeah. - 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️ i would kill to read your drafts anyhooo

Sitting in the back corner booth (your favourite) with Syd - yoooo the one she sat in with carmy and also mikey’s carving!! tony’s restaurant!! the circles are circling

“You wish you were dead when you’re there, but you’d rather be dead than do anything else?” - onion you are just describing life on a movie set (also i want to find a new nickname for you but i’m struggling)

“Dad cut the cord on his business phone when it transferred to me” - not entirely true now is it chippy!! well maybe it is but i just remember the thing about her not wanting people to be able to reach her after mikey

squidink are so cute, their lil morning date, and what’d you know they shared a smoochy smooch after

You would argue you're not even that close, but he'd slap you upside the head. - AS HE SHOULD!! (i’d go to war for their friendship)

you told Mikey he was getting a mold problem. - chippy is just superior

“S’been a while since he’s had a good influence.” - chippy being close with louis and eva just makes me:’))))

“I’m just saying, you’re alike.” - the way they all see it. oh be still my beating heart

He makes you jump for it - my 5’1 ass would be fucked. i mean i would TRY, trust, but

if you take all his names. - kicking ass and taking names, literally

On your way to the kitchen, you’re stopped and walked backwards to a booth in the corner by Richie. - this makes me emotional. i love them so much stop

not Richie coming with your ice water, but Carmen - pookie!!! wait now i just see the word poo, okay scratch that- BABYBOY!!!<3<3

He pauses mid slide into the booth, sitting across from you. He seemed all cool and collected and is now suddenly extremely caught off guard. Already sweaty. “Y-yeah, I’m better, thank you—” - this is the cutest interaction in the whole series. YEAH I SAID IT

“Carmy is fine. Tony is fine?” “I’m doing okay, yeah.” - HOW AM I NOT SUPPOSED TO BE UNHEALTHILY OBSESSED WITH THEM

You nod down at the dish. “Do the thing.” - i mean i know she’s the guy, but the way they seem so comfortable with each other (like old friends) already is so special to me

Two things can be true - they can!!

“It’s the plate, isn’t it? I told Syd—” - the plate 🥹 rip to a real one (jk it survived, but it was almost a frisbee)

You put a hand on his knee to stop the shaking - now i’m shaking

You’re nothing. You’re— - she and carmy are soooo similar ugh

“Who needs a coffee? Or water?” - my fave barista!!

Marcus has fresh coffee beans (that he’s willing to share!) - marcus crumb<33 backgroud bestieee

It’s too worth it, when she says it like that and slaps your cheek - it would add like 10 years to my life for sure

You switch it for a spiced coffee when he’s not looking. He’s silently very thankful. - chip really is that girl we knew she was

supreme favouritism - which carmy later gets<3

“It’s the one oat milk latte I made.” - oat milk!!!

then darts looks over her shoulder like she’s making an under the table deal - i love them and their schemes so much

Fak running by you to steal a coffee off your tray. - he’s so funny aidjeiri

“Collector’s item...” You nod / “That’s what I fuckin’ said!” - don’t think i forgot about this. i actually have not moved on from this moment

You pivot your shoulder for him to throw it over, hands too busy. / He throws it over your shoulder. - THEY’RE SO!!!!!

“Oh, fuck, missed your twists, Chip.” - he’s so💓💖🫶🏼💕

“Fuckin’ terrible, Carm.” - the way mikey would say this oh OH

Why it shot water straight at my tits— Close your eyes - i know he looked away but like 😁😁😁

removing your walls have completely shattered his. - yo this is so cute??

we must remember, I love Syd. - we must remember that is her gf

“You can’t take yourself?” “Bitch?” - LMFAOOO

“Like… an hour?” “It had been 23 minutes.” - Lakskfkfirorikr remember when we had ALL the comedy

“You’re doing a good job, Carmy.” - 🥹🥹🥹 i miss them so much

You’re considering a career in stand up exclusively for him because it feels like such a reward to hear it. - *evaporates*

“I’d say yeah, probably not ready for a relationship” - he is with the right person (please please please)

oh! i almost forgot but what is chip’s coffee order? i was thinking it seems plain based on the writing (her offering to swap if he didn’t like her fancier take) but i could also see her fucking with some syrups

“I know you’re a Michelin star fuckin’ big deal but like, me personally, I can’t name a thing I got perfect the first time I did it.” - i see how similar she and mikey is now, i really do. carmy you’re in love with your brother - well a mix of your brother and yourself

The Berf shall prevail. - aSJHDHEBSBA ONION

For a Bear, she sure knows how to poke one. - YOUR WRITING!!! mwah mwah mwah

“There’s something about a handywoman that Fak cannot match.” - real

She chuckles, slightly. There is something about you that feels familiar. - *clutches chest*

reading the old chapters now is so!!! like knowing the back story and how certain things are panning out (at least for now) just makes it even more enjoyable to read and to catch all your lil hints. you smartass.

Had to answer one last thing before bed (GUESS WHO DIDN’T FINISH THE DRAFT FUCK!!! But I’m like,,, like closing in,, i think,,, I do hate this last scene so far I think I have to barf out all the nonsense and pull back. Pray for me)

You think you would love to read my drafts but if you did you would find— Well actually, here, here’s a list of just some of the edits/beats I wrote for Something to Do.

Should I be sharing my behind the scenes secrets? Probably not but eh it’s fine. Something to Do had I think the most edits out of any chapter. NONE OF THAT MATTERS THOUGH BABY WE’RE TALKING ABOUT CHAPTER 2 I JUST WANTED TO MAKE YOU AWARE THAT MY DRAFTS ARE,, , BAD.

Anyways. The circles are fucking CIRCLING. I love(d) injecting world moments like that that weren’t all that relevant in the moment but LATER you’re like OH YEAAHHH THAT THING FROM EARLIER!! Chekov’s table carving.

100% I’m describing a set, I honestly did just assume every career is like working on a set— You all not in film also wanna die at your jobs but if you weren’t you’d explode, right? Right? I made the right career choice? Right?

Also NEW NICKNAMES— I don’t love Onion but it seems it has been chosen. And I must live with my fate. Could do Caramel? No one’s gonna do caramel. On my main I am salt, so you could do Salt but I do not imagine this will catch on.

She’s a fucking LIAR!!! This I think was the one full lie I ever let Tony tell. Everything else is pretty much true or of omission but this one yes, she just stopped fuckin’ payin it. Dad’s a business man!! Of course he wouldn’t just cut the cord— You liar pants Tony!!!

100% canon every time the camera cuts on squidink you can assume they kissed in between scenes. Canon i said it!!

This chapter is so telling to re-read, because you can really tell how disjointed Chip feels, without Mikey here— To me, at least. Like, the friendship she has/had with Richie is so barely present with him in this chapter— And she THINKS they’re not close!!! Bitch!!! It’s been you two the whole time!!! I love seeing how much this changed, by Ad Interim. Our baby got her groove back. And you can see it w/ Tina too! I love my mother…. Boots the house…. She’s so very good at seeing people now, I love HER!!!

BABYBOY TIME!!! Cutest interaction in the whole series you say?? Yeah that’s probably true. I was gonna say I gotta try to one up myself but to be fair there’s something about introductions that can’t be matched. Alas. Perchance (you can’t just say—).

100% this was Tony being the guy per usual but I also think like, she’s real special cause she knows Carmen pretty well through word of mouth— To her they are kinda like old friends. And I think that’s also what contributes so well to her COMPLETELY DISARMING HIS ASS as he gets to know her back lmao.

That plate was so fucking close to being frisbee’d— It was gonna be this whole tragic mirroring scene to a scene I had considered with Mikey but pivoted because it just ,,,, did not hit. That plate sure would’ve hit the fuckin wall though yesssiirrrr— (I have much to say about the You’re Nothing, but I will get into that in a later ask down the line I SWEAR THERE’S A WHOLE THING!!)

Anyways, favourite barista !!! I love that Chip has essentially learned every trade by wanting to impress someone. Her dad, Syd, Mikey. She’s so people pleaser. Number 1 people pleaser, my beloved. And then she makes Carmen arguably one of the best coffees!! Immediately trying to impress him after 2 fucking seconds. She’s so fucking dumb. I love her. She is me and I am her.

I would actually love to hear ad nauseam why The Berf shirt is so unforgettable. Actually no I get it. It’s them. This whole moment is just very them. You can see their friendship start to finally peek out and it’s a real joy.

“Fuckin’ terrible, Carm.” - the way mikey would say this oh OH

AND THE CROWD HISSES IN PAIN!!!! Yessir, yessirrrrrrrr— She is SO THE GUY SHE IS SO MIKEY!!! THE FRUITS OF MY LABOUR!!

We’ll come back to this sweetness and comedy eventually. Maybeee. We got some in Something to Do— they’ll be FINE!!

Now Chip’s coffee order— This honestly went unwritten for so long for a couple reasons. 1 - I rarely drink coffee so I suck at having opinions. 2 - Tony is really just an OC at this point but it is still technically insert, so like, whatever YOUR coffee is, is her’s.

But like… now? Between u and me? And the 3 other people that will actually bother to read this ask? I think she’d do a cortado. Half steamed milk, Half espresso. It’s simple so it’s very switchable but I think still very her, yknow?

100% She is just a blend of Mikey and Carmen. HEY HALF MILK HALF ESPRESSO!!!! LETS GO!!! IT’S A METAPHOR NOW FUCK YEAH!!! Now is she a blend of them because I deeply relate to both brothers and really just fuckin stuck my whole self into Tony? …. .i decline to speak at this time

THE BERF!! SHALL!! PREVAIL!!! I need to buy a Berf shirt. Maybe I will use my ko-fi money (i love u) to buy a Berf shirt. Collector’s item.

The whole Nat scene is SUCH A TOUGH READ AFTER TWO STEPS BACK HONESTLY,,, THEY BOTH HANDLE GRIEF IN SUCH DIFFERENT WAYS AND IT’S SUHKFJSFKH FUCK!!! And Natalie just seeing Mikey in her, like fucking everyone does— It’s just so— I’m fuckin DYING!!

Also. I’m so glad tumblr blurs ask photos because I remembered looking at these and then I forgot what they were and then i got to look with fresh eyes again and have a giggle all over again. THE MIRRORJEG— (processing an emotion)I’ll include these in a comp eventually, but here are some from my collection. Meme exchange, only fair.

I LOVE YOU AS ALWAYS KISS KISS I AM NOT GONNA GET TO SHOWER TONIGHT I’M GONNA HAVE TO GO TO WORK WITH AN OILY SCALP AND IT’S YOUR (my) FAULT!!

#yapping #ask #popcornpoppin #extensive yapping #Do The Thing / Toilet Repair #chicagos kindest comp #chicagos kindest #richip

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currentlyfckingurmom · 2 years ago

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Her Song part 33

"I'm just gonna go take a quick walk around the building. He might be here," JJ announces.

"Okay. Be safe," I reply. She nods and exits the apartment, leaving Florence and I alone in the living room.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me about any of this," Florence starts. "I mean, we're in a relationship, are we not? I know we haven't really had this talk yet, but I'm not gonna dance around it with high school bullshit. I really care about you, Y/N, and that means no keeping secrets from each other."

"I know, Flo, I know I should've told you. But I was just so focused on getting you and Syd out of here, I wasn't thinking. I just want you to be safe, mon amour. Je t'aimerais jusqu'à la fin de mes jours."

Her glassy eyes look into mine and I smile softly. "I have no idea what the fuck you just said, but it was really hot," she says. We both laugh and I pull her body close to mine, wrapping her in a tight hug.

"It doesn't matter," I whisper into her neck, pressing a kiss to the soft skin. "I wanna do this. I wanna be all in with you. As soon as Ben is gone, I want you. For real. I want the world to know that I am head over heels for Florence Pugh. I want Syd to know. I just want you."

"Head over heels, huh?"

"From the second I laid eyes on you."

"Let's tell the world, Y/N."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." We smile like teenagers in love and kiss fervently, forgetting the troubles surrounding us, just for a moment. My phone dings in my pocket. I ignore it and hold Florence closer. It dings again. I sigh and dig it out.

JJ: SOS JJ: ROOF ACROSS THE STREET

"What the hell?" I mumble, jumping up from the couch. I get out on the balcony and squint my eyes to try and see the rooftop of the building across the street. I can't see anything. My phone vibrates with an incoming call from JJ.

"JJ, what's going on?"

"Well, I caught your friend here lurking around the building. Not very nice," a male voice gravels through the phone. "Don't worry though, sweetheart, I took care of her for us. See you soon."

"Ben, I swear to god if you touch her-" He cuts me off by ending the call. "Shit!" I yell.

"Y/N, what's going on?" Florence asks shakily.

"Stay here, call the police," I instruct as I throw on a pair of shoes.

"Are you fucking crazy? You're not going out there alone! Tell me what's going on!"

"Flo, there's no time! Just trust me, okay? Call the cops. I'll be back." I open the apartment door and step out, looking back as I exit. "I love you, Flo." And then I close the door, running through the apartment building. Down the stairs. Down. Down. Faster. Down. Across the street. My lungs are burning. I don't have a fucking plan. I reach the building across the street. The doors are locked. I run around the side, trying every door in sight. They're all locked.

"Fuck!" I grunt, pulling on another door. I run around the back of the building, tripping over the cracked concrete but quickly getting back up. I see the fire escapes, and I take my chance. I climb up and up until the black metal stairs end. There's still about ten feet to the roof. Fuck. I glance over at the metal pipe attached to the side of the building and swallow thickly. Before I can change my mind, I grab ahold of it and swing my body off the fire escape, placing my feet on the rivets in the pipe. I take a few shaky breaths, then force myself to climb. Up and up, until I reach the top and heave my body onto the roof. "Holy shit," I breathe, standing shakily. I glance around but don't see anything.

I pause, thinking I heard something. A man's voice. I can't make out what he's saying, but I know it's him. And it sounds like he's dragging something. JJ. I step quietly across the roof, pausing when I reach the corner of what looks like a small utility room. I peer around the corner and immediately jump back, seeing Ben dragging JJ's motionless body across the roof.

"Y'know, it's not very nice to spy on people, Agent Jareau. You couldn't have just left us alone, huh? It's too bad...You were a pretty one," he mumbles.

My heart lurches in my chest and I step out from the corner. "Ben!"

He looks up with wide eyes, momentarily looking ashamed to be caught red-handed. "Well hey there, darlin'. Glad you could join us. Wanna lend a hand?" I don't say anything. "No? Okay then. Why don't you sit pretty and give me a few minutes okay? Then we can talk, yeah?" he says brightly with a sickeningly sweet smile.

"Fuck you," I spit, but I'm frozen to my spot. My legs won't move forward. I'm scared of this man. I don't want to be, but, fuck, I am.

"Oh, we'll get there, baby, trust me. But right now I'm busy," he grunts, dragging JJ's body once again. I lunge forward and push him, but he barely budges and now I'm only a few inches from his huge body. "See now that was just unnecessary, sweetheart," he says tightly, grabbing my arm.

I wince, already feeling the bruises forming on my arm. "Ben, you're hurting me," I say through clenched teeth.

"If you want me to play nice, then you're gonna have to behave," he spits.

"Hey, douchebag!" someone yells, and then Ben collapses to the ground. Florence is standing there holding a pipe, her mouth agape.

"Holy shit, Flo. I told you to stay there! What the fuck!" I yell, panicking.

"Oh, yeah, you clearly had the situation under control here. I'll just go then, yeah? You can deal with the big stalker-man by yourself, hm?" she retorts, visibly panicked.

"I was working on it!" I scream.

"You cunt!" Ben seethes as he staggers into a standing position, clutching the back of his head. He stumbles toward Florence and I jump in front of her. He steps closer and I slap him across the face as Florence and I both scream. "I'm gonna kill you both, I swear to god!" Florence knees him in the nuts and he crumples to the ground, his face bright red. He grabs her ankle, pulling her to the ground as he punches the side of her face, and she falls unconscious. He lunges at me with a knife, tackling me to the ground and holding the blade to my throat. "I didn't wanna have to do this but I'm running out of options, sweetheart. I'm giving you one last chance to behave. Are you gonna be a good girl for me?"

"Go to hell," I grit out as I feel a line of blood trickling down my throat. He puts more pressure on the blade and I feel it cut deeper, but then his face goes slack and he falls to the ground beside me. I don't even register the gunshot. I only stare into his glassy eyes. Everything is ringing and I'm getting dizzier. He's dead? They're safe. It's okay. He's dead.

I faintly hear yelling. Someone is kneeling over me, tapping my face. "Hey, Y/N, baby, c'mon. Say something, please. It's Flo, can you hear me?"

"It's, yeah...I can- I can hear you," I mumble.

"She's losing a lot of blood," Flo says tightly.

"I know. The ambulance is on the way," JJ answers, blood dripping down the side of her face.

"Flo? Am I- Am I gonna die?" I cough, blood spilling from my mouth.

"No, darling, you're not gonna die. I promise, okay? You're gonna be just fine. Syd needs you, Y/N. Just keep your eyes open, okay?"

"Okay," I whisper, but everything's getting heavier and I'm just so tired. My eyes start slipping closed.

"Hey, don't do that. Stay with me, Y/N. Y/N? Hey, I love you, asshole. Keep your eyes open. Just for a few more minutes, okay?"

"Okay," I promise, and then my eyes close and everything goes black.

#florence pugh x reader #florence pugh

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dannyxwhitechapel · 2 years ago

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❝ I wanna tear this place apart tonight And have you thank me for my rage ❞

( n/a / 33 / cis male / he/him ) — did you see DANNY WHITECHAPEL wandering around the island today? they kind of look like CHRIS WOOD from certain angles? i heard around town that the FREELANCE HACKER is CHARMING, and PATIENT, but also IMPULSIVE, and MANIPULATIVE. people say that they remind them of BRIGHT COMPUTER SCREENS, TWIZZLERS HANGING FROM THE CORNER OF HIS MOUTH AS OFTEN A CIGARETTE, and LEATHER JACKETS, and HEARTACHE by FROM ASHES TO NEW is definitely their theme song. they seem like a nice enough person, but we all know how hard it is to keep a pristine reputation in a small town. ( marie / 27 / est / she/her )

triggers: mentions of parental neglect, childhood abuse, domestic abuse, death, violence

stats

Character Name: Daniel Samuel Anderson (now Whitechapel)

Nickname: Danny, Danny Boy,

Age: 33 years old

Birthday: June, 27th 1989

Gender/Pronouns: Cis man, He/Him

Sexuality: Bisexual

Occupation: Hacker.

How long they’ve been in Kingshaven: Two month

Similar: Kai Parker, Alex Karev, Crowley, Katherine Pierce, Mon-El, Joey Tribianni (foodie), Stiles Stilinski (techie), Theo, Johnny Faust, Damon Salvatore

Inspo: Spotify | Pinterest

personality

impulsive

sadistic

manipulative

patient

observant

charming

pretty goofy (idiot)

temperamental

cunning

THE CHESS MASTER - this is an incredibly patient muse, they may seem oblivious, but in reality, they are quietly plotting something big. they’re intelligent and not everyone around them is aware of this, which works to their advantage.

key points:

Danny was born into a trashy family that lived in a small town on the outskirts of Nashville, TN. His father was famously abusive in the household, beating on him and his sister more often than not. His mother was an addict who used heroin and coke as a means to escape the life they lived.

She passed away when Danny was eight and his sister was three. Overdose. After that, Danny was left to try and raise his sister while dealing with their abusive father. Most of Danny’s life was spent figuring out his next meal and avoiding a beating at his father’s hand.

The only ray of minor sunshine in his life came in the form of his first love (wanted connection). They grew up together, neighbors, This person knew of the horrors behind the Anderson home, but she tried her best to alleviate it through their friendship. Danny and her were complete opposites but it worked. They grew up as best friends and she was the first person Danny found himself actually caring for. More information is found below.

His father eventually passed away during Danny’s junior year of high school under suspicious circumstances. Without the man’s domineering hand upon him, Danny’s familial ties disintegrated. He didn’t particularly care for his family and though maybe odd, the lack of being able to connect with people wasn’t abnormal...at least to Danny it wasn’t.

From early on, Danny had developed a love for technology. A geek to the core, he was quick to learn his way around a computer and even quicker to learn his way around the web.

He has built a reputation online as one of the best-known hackers. He is a certified hacker for a legal front but most of his sizable income comes from jobs he does through the dark web.

A year and a half ago, Danny met Syd Whitechapel while the man was passing through his town. Their connection was conflicting at first. The two are far too similar at times to seemingly make it work. Not to mention that Daniel had been living in the closet for far too long.

Sooner than both thought possible, they fell in love. Even faster than that, it seemed, the two were on the road. They left behind a mess of Danny’s hometown but there were no regrets. A couple of months later, Danny planted a wedding ring on Syd’s finger while they were in bed together and that was their marriage.

They lived on the road for most of their time, only stopping in towns for a couple of weeks at time.

Two months ago, Baby - Syd’s car that Danny is convinced he loves more than him - shit the bed. Much to his husband’s dismay. While they are waiting for the car to be practically built back from the shell up, they are making somewhat of a life in kingshaven.

What the town doesn’t know is they gained more than they bargained for with these two.

headcannons.

Do not call him by his full name. He absolutely hates it.

Has a pretty bad temper and is sadistic to the core. A bored Danny is a dangerous Danny. His mind needs constant stimulation or he grows exceedingly restless and that leads to impulsive decisions that bring the sense of chaos and adrenaline he needs.

The kind of guy that can be ruled by his emotions (impulsivity) and thinks about things later.

Lower on the sociopathy scale so he’s able to feel some emotions at a higher intensity and comprehend to an extent but he prefers not to. He technically has a sense of right and wrong but blatantly doesn’t give a shit and would prefer to cause destruction at others' expense.

As a result of - what he calls his “normie” side, Danny can make more connections and does care about certain special people.

Daniel loves twizzlers - that is the way to the man’s heart.

He knows how to ride a motorcycle. Owned one back home but sold it when he hit the road.

Was a bartender in his early twenties and hated it so he only did it for a couple of years.

Danny is fascinated with technology. He has heavily invested in it since he was young and has become a tech wizard of sorts, going as far as becoming one of the most well-known hackers on the dark web, even if not known by his actual name. Mostly, he does it for fun because why the fuck not? Besides the illegal stuff he gets to pull is downright ridiculous and sometimes, enjoyable. Plus, his comfortable bank account is not complaining at all.

He wears a silver band with the words partners in crime on his left ring finger - it’s his wedding band, handmade by his husband. It’s a combination of the original rings Danny got and the creation of Syd’s hands.

Often is seen wearing a black leather jacket

Fluent in English, some French and is determined to learn Ukrainian.

wanted connections

CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL LIST OF HIS WANTED CONNECTIONS

First Love/Best Friend: This girl was Danny’s best friend growing up and one of the few people he genuinely cares about. He has always had a soft spot for her and probably always will. She was sunshine in the midst of his dark childhood and the reason why Danny even knows how to love or really form any sort of connection with people. They dated through high school but mutually broke up at the end of it as life took them separate ways. They reunited briefly back home before Danny left Nashville. There is a sense of unfinished business among them.

Younger Sister: The Anderson siblings would have had a difficult relationship. To an extent, Danny would have been protective of his sister. Whether that is born out of genuine concern or obligation is up for debate. His sister would have had a front-row seat at the earlier and maybe more subtle signs that Danny had never fully been there in the head. The early signs of lack of empathy, manipulation, and sadistic behavior. However, these were minimal and often went unnoticed or overshadowed by the horrors of their home. Brushed under the rug as a result of just trying to survive. She left home to live with some distant relatives when she was twelve and they haven’t seen each other since. We can discuss their dynamic afterward. Would love to explore that relationship and how it would be now that they are grown up and have been separated for so long.

Enemies: Danny has no regard for right or wrong and whatever he does is born out of either spite, boredom, or sadistic need. I would love to see an enemy relationship that bites him in the ass. Someone he wronged in the past? someone who can sense something isn’t fully right about him and calls out his bullshit?

Previous Customers: Danny’s jobs online vary from menial things or higher jobs. From black mail, to finding out personal details of someone, to hacking into a major corporation for retaliation. He’ll do anything for the right price and nothing is too dark or dirty for him. Does your muse have a dirty little job that might need some assistance?

GIVE ME EVERYTHING

#intro #khintro #tw murder #tw abuse #tw child neglect

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sydmarch · 9 days ago

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there's been too many times i've clicked an old link & it no longer goes anywhere so i'm gonna begin the tedious yet satisfying process of archiving some interviews that i reference frequently starting with this one

Like the offspring of any revered icon, Brandon Cronenberg’s last name grabs hold of your attention. Indeed, the 33-year-old Canadian filmmaker is the son of David Cronenberg, genre cinema’s great auteur of psychodrama and body horror. And like his father, Brandon expresses a strong interest in the inextricable brain-body link, not to mention the dark crevices of society’s underbelly. Antiviral, Brandon’s feature debut as writer and director, is a sci-fi satire with a sharp conceit worthy of that unmistakable surname, and a stylistic strength that promises more compelling work from its maker. Uniquely skewering our ever-evolving (or devolving) obsessions with celebrity, the movie, now playing in limited release, tells of a world intended to appear not very far from our own, wherein a facility known as the Lucas Clinic perpetuates the ultimate form of star worship, infecting rabid fans with diseases harvested from the cells of the über-famous (what’s more, delis on corners sell “steaks” grown from celebrity muscle cells, so die-hards can literally consume their favorite A-Listers). At the center of this seriocomic nightmare is Syd March (Caleb Landry Jones), a Lucas employee who also moonlights as part of the superstar-sickness black market. Things turn especially ugly when Syd comes down with the same bug afflicting America’s most-wanted sweetheart.

In person, Brandon is deeply humble and unassuming, a boyish-looking guy with his father’s grey-blue eyes, and a few piercings that project just the right amount of edge. He’s remarkably articulate about the themes his film explores, and he proves just how fully he mulled over the movie’s ideas, which, according to him, aren’t that far-fetched at all. In a high-rise in the heart of Midtown Manhattan, in a small office whose unremarkable sterility calls to mind Antiviral‘s stark aesthetic, Brandon chats at length about the psychology of fandom, the time he cozied up with a primate on one of his dad’s sets, and his thoughts on the trajectory of celebrity culture, which, if not literally, has surely already gone viral.

Filmmaker: There’s a lot of pointed dialogue in Antiviral in regard to celebrity, such as, “What does it mean to deserve to be famous?” and, “Celebrities are not people, they’re group hallucinations.” How much of this is your own perspective? Do you believe that certain celebrities don’t deserve to be famous? Do you see them as being real people?

Brandon Cronenberg: A lot of that is me, but it’s also filtered through the character, so not everything said in the film is just directly my own opinion. “Celebrities are not real, they’re group hallucinations”—I do believe that. I think that the majority of people have this idea about a celebrity, but that idea is sort of a culturally constructed thing and kind of a fiction. Because a lot of what’s reported about celebrities is made up, and a lot of our sense of them comes from the media and is sort of unrelated to the human being who is living their own life, and living and dying in this way that’s sort of disconnected from their media double. But I think anyone who’s famous deserves to be famous, only in the sense that this whole criterion for fame is that people recognize you enough to be famous. A lot of people say, “Oh, this person doesn’t deserve to be famous.” What is it really to deserve to be famous? It isn’t an accomplishment. I think fame has always been something other than an accomplishment. It’s sometimes tied to an accomplishment—sometimes people become famous because they accomplish something. But I think it has more to do with the repetition of an image, or of a person, or a name, rather than fulfilling a certain obligation.

Filmmaker: The whole thing must be a more interesting concept for you now, since you’re essentially becoming a celebrity yourself, being a filmmaker in the public eye.

Brandon Cronenberg: That aspect of it is really weird, because going around promoting a film that’s about something like this is kind of strange. But, two things: First of all, as a director, and especially as a Canadian director, I can only become so famous, so I don’t imagine myself getting stalked by paparazzi anytime soon. Also, I think that the film is about the industry of celebrity, which isn’t the same as just celebrity in general, in a sense. I think, for instance, to recognize someone and have respect for them because you like their work, and to take an interest in what they’re doing because of that isn’t unhealthy—I think that’s fine. It’s more that certain level of fanaticism that represents a kind of mania and a kind of delusion that is unhealthy. And tied to that is this increasingly insular industry of celebrity that sort of mass produces fame through reality television, and tries to elevate people to this point where they’re famous and their job is just being famous for a year, or two years. I think that is different from just talking about your film, in that all art, to a certain extent, is a cultural dialogue that you need to engage in as an artist.

Filmmaker: What specific thing in our celebrity-obsessed culture do you see as being most closely linked to the satirical extreme that you go to in Antiviral?

Brandon Cronenberg: I don’t think there is one! [Laughs.] Someone bought John Lennon’s teeth, you know? But that isn’t even just the one thing. Covers of magazines comparing people’s cellulite…[the film is] only a very slight exaggeration. That industry’s pretty insane.

Filmmaker: I read that this idea germinated when you were in film school at 24, and came down with a bad case of the flu. Did a fear of illness or mortality factor heavily into the concept?

Brandon Cronenberg: It wasn’t really a fear of illness, it was more just a moment of seeing disease as something intimate. Because a virus is manufactured, literally, in someone else’s body, by their infected cells, and then gets into your body and penetrates your own cells, and that’s hugely intimate if you think about it on that level. So it was that moment of seeing disease as intimate and trying to think of a character who would see disease as something intimate. We tend to be repulsed by disease, but you could imagine an obsessed fan who would want a celebrity’s virus, or something, as a way of feeling physically connected to them if it were described in those terms—something from their body into your body. Don’t you want that? Someone’s gotta want that.

Filmmaker: You’re 32 now?

Brandon Cronenberg: 33.

Filmmaker: In the the eight or nine years since you first toyed with this idea, the world of celebrity and fan relationships has changed quite a bit, with social media somewhat leveling the field of interaction and things like that. Was there ever a worry that the concept would lose some of its relevance because of that evolution?

Brandon Cronenberg: During editing, a friend of mine sent me this Sarah Michelle Gellar clip where she was on Jimmy Kimmel Live and she was saying that she was worried about singing because she had this cold—she was worried she would infect the entire audience. And then everyone started applauding madly and cheering. So I thought, “Okay, we’re pretty much making a documentary now!” So it’s changed and it hasn’t changed. I’ve been talking about Paris Hilton lately. She’s out of style now, and maybe seems like the obvious, passé celebrity to go to to discuss this sort of thing, but I think, early on, when I was first writing, she was just really becoming very public, and there’s something about that moment, when a lot of people were using the phrase “famous for being famous.” Again, I don’t think fame has ever been inherently bound to accomplishment, but I think she was so just famous for being famous, in a way that everyone recognized, that I think that really fed into the celebrity industry. It was a certain moment in the history of celebrity. Now, to say that she’s famous for being famous is not even interesting anymore, but at the time, people were like, “Haven’t you noticed that Paris Hilton is famous for being famous and isn’t that kind of weird?”

Filmmaker: As the central character, Syd March, Caleb Landry Jones gives a really impressive breakthrough performance, and he looks like a runway model, which amplifies your visual juxtaposition of fashion-magazine chic and body horror. Can you describe how you came to work with him and how he complimented your aesthetic?

Brandon Cronenberg: Sure. His agent had worked with my producer, and when we were looking around for actors, he sent Caleb’s stuff over—some clips from films he’d been in and an audition he’d done for another film. And we all got immediately, really excited because he has that very striking look, and he’s very intense, and a great actor, He really has that thing that some actors have where they’re immediately interesting to watch. Even when they’re doing very mundane things, they’re somehow able to be captivating performers. So we wanted to get him and he wanted to do it, so it worked out nicely. I had actually written the character for a much older actor, and the character was a bit different in my mind, but when I saw Caleb, I wanted to plug into the excitement and roll with it. Now I can’t see that character any other way. He brought a huge amount to it and that was part of developing that character—discovering all of this stuff with him.

Filmmaker: And then, of course, there’s Sarah Gadon, who starred in your father’s Cosmopolis last year, and A Dangerous Method the year before that. Did your father recommend her to you?

Brandon Cronenberg: Well I saw her in A Dangerous Method, and I thought she was great, but I hadn’t met her until we sent her the script. I liked what I saw from her in my dad’s work, and then I asked him, and he said he had a great experience with her. So, whether you’re related to them or not, being able to talk to directors who have worked with actors, it’s a good thing.

Filmmaker: Gadon’s character, Hannah Geist, is the ultimate desirable object in Antiviral, and then there’s also Aria Noble, played by Nenna Abuwa. I was wondering why you didn’t opt to focus on any obsessed-over male celebrities in the film.

Brandon Cronenberg: There are a couple of references, and on the walls there were some male celerities in the office. I guess I was focusing on female celebrities just because of the degree of the fetishy body stuff you get in celebrity news. I mean, you get that with male celebrities, too, but the “who has the worse cellulite?” stuff is always female. The covers of those magazines, the surgical precision with which people fetishize and criticize—it’s particularly extreme for females. But there are both in the film.

Filmmaker: I also read that you had initial interest in writing, painting, and music, and then turned to film because it merges all of those things. How influential was your father, or his work, in that decision?

Brandon Cronenberg: I was less inclined to get into film because of people’s preconceptions about me based on my father and the fact that they assumed I should want to be in film. Like, “Oh, you must love film and want to be in your father’s footsteps!” It was always kind of obnoxious and kind of off-putting. So, I would say it probably took me longer to develop an interest in film because of that, if anything.

Filmmaker: Yeah, the connection must be a bit of a double-edged sword. There’s a clear cache to it, but also this pressure to assert your own voice, and to live up to expectations.

Brandon Cronenberg: I’ve felt that pressure, but only because everyone keeps telling me I should! I didn’t feel any special pressure, but especially now that the film’s done, everyone’s asking me if I feel some special pressure to live up to something, so I’m starting to wonder if I should.

Filmmaker: Well there’s obviously some thematic kinship going on. Did that develop on more of an unconscious level?

Brandon Cronenberg: Yeah, it’s more…I decided when I got into film that I needed to not worry about his career and just do whatever was interesting to me. To actively avoid it would be defining myself in opposition to him and in that way defining myself in terms of his career still. So I just did what I thought was interesting. I mean, he’s my father and we have a close relationship, so the fact that some of our interests overlap is pretty reasonable.

Filmmaker: Growing up, were you on set for a lot of your dad’s projects? Any experiences tied to specific films that stand out as remarkable?

Brandon Cronenberg: I was present to varying degrees. I mean, obviously, a lot of it happened when I was very young, or before I was born, depending on the film. I worked on eXistenZ in the special effects department, so I was very around for that one. Some of the other ones, not so much. I tried to be on set a fair bit for Eastern Promises just because I was already in film school at that point, and wanted to absorb what I could. When I was a kid, the baboon from The Fly sat on my lap. That was a pretty memorable experience! But I don’t think it had an influence on me as a filmmaker. [Laughs.]

Filmmaker: Good stuff. In Anitviral, I noticed you also make passing mention of Henrietta Lacks, who’s made a lot of headlines thanks to Rebecca Skloot’s bestseller, and even recent updates about the continued usage of her cells. Did Lacks’s story strongly influence the film’s concept, or was it just woven into the fabric of it?

Brandon Cronenberg: It didn’t strongly influence it, but it’s just a really interesting idea, I think. Because that relationship between identity and the body is really interesting. I think they’re two very different things, and I think identity is this very theoretical, weird thing that no one has a full grasp on. I don’t think we can perceive ourselves perfectly clearly, but obviously, from the outside, people can’t know us perfectly either, and we’re always in flux. And then you have this body that people associate that identity with, but again, the body is constantly changing, and I find all of that stuff really interesting. And in the film, obviously, there’s the celebrity cell steaks, and the idea that they’re grown from the celebrities. It’s sort of cannibalism, but it’s not quite cannibalism. Are they that meat, or is that another thing? The human being, the body—is that the celebrity, or is the celebrity this cultural idea, this abstract thing? So that was just a really great, real-world example of that sort of thing, but it wasn’t at the core of the film.

Filmmaker: You mention in press notes that you’re naturally reclusive, much like Syd March. How much do you identify with the character? Beyond, you know, his activities…

Brandon Cronenberg: Well, I definitely put some of myself in there. But in weird ways. I was going to college in this horrible city in Ontario, called London, Ontario, and it was hard to get good food there. So, for a while, I was eating a lot of egg salad sandwiches and orange juice. And when I was thinking about the character, I thought that for a character whose main interest in his body is this disease, I could see how food could become just a purely functional thing—just a necessity that he takes no pleasure in. So he has these units of food—orange juice paired with egg salad sandwiches. Interestingly, Caleb—because he likes to live the character as much as he can—was eating all egg salad sandwiches and orange juice when he initially got to Canada, and then he got really sick of them. So he was worried that when it came to doing those scenes, he wouldn’t be able to eat the egg salad because he was so grossed out by it at that point. But apparently the props department makes solid egg salad, so… [Laughs.]

Filmmaker: There’s a lot of talk in the film about the human face. Can you discuss your fascination with it?

Brandon Cronenberg: Yeah. There’s a line in the film that says “[the face] has a high information resolution.” I think it’s true. There’s such a huge amount of information that we communicate consciously and unconsciously through our facial expressions. And apparently that’s why we so commonly see faces in clouds and in rock formations—because our brains are tuned to look for faces, and look toward that information. Apparently with zebras, it’s the stripes. We see zebras as just striped animals, but they really identify each other through the stripes and they can really recognize quickly individual markings, and that’s a huge identifying factor for them. So I think the way we see things depends greatly on our biology.

Filmmaker: Antiviral speaks for itself, but how would you sum up your current view of our celebrity culture? Where do you see it going? Is it on a hopeless downward spiral? Is all this transparency just becoming more and more unhealthy? Is it getting worse? Better?

Brandon Cronenberg: I don’t know! I think it’s a version of something, a kind of broader, older human tendency that we have to deify each other. One example I tend to fall back on is sainthood. The saints were sort of celebrities. They were people elevated to the status of gods, almost, and there’s the iconography—the recognizable repetition of images—and the same physical fetishism. There are the old Italian churches that claim to have the finger bone of such-and-such saint, and it’s imbued with this great power, these relics. So I think we do that, for some reason. I’m not exactly sure why. I think it’s hard to predict where celebrity culture is going, just because I don’t think it’s unique to our time and place. Again, I think the industrial aspect of that is something that’s fairly unique, or that’s at least becoming more prominent—the manufacturing of celebrity to make money. And I assume that will, just by the nature of industry, go as far as it possibly can, but it’s hard to predict. I don’t know if it will implode eventually. I think we’ll always have some version of celebrity.

#texticles #eventually im gonna edit these to not have read mores bcus the fact that readmores become inaccessible if sth happsnt to a blog is a traged #antiviral #av archival

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ob-la-di-ob-la-di · 4 years ago

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pink floyd

Omg I just have answered this!!! Anyway thank you babe for the ask<33

Favorite song: Mother

Least favorite song: I don't have any

Have I ever seen them live : unfortunately No *runs away to a corner and cries*

Favorite band member : Syd

Least favorite band member : *inserts blinking white man gif*

How many of their albums you have: all of them :)

Favorite album : The Wall ( rog and I have same concept)

#omg this was fun hahaha #sweet caring mutual #answered

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bedbellyandbeyond · 5 years ago

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Azeros

(Story Post, New Character)

They didn’t waste time after breakfast getting ready for the ritual. There were pearl coloured robes for the humans to wear but Dusty and Köbi were expected to be in their true forms (or at least truest form with out blinding the others). In their true forms however, they both had wings and took up a lot of space. They had to tuck their wings very close as they were packed into the elevator, both not wanting to touch wings as well and limiting their space even more for it. Dante was blowing feathers out of his face as he waited to see what floor Sydryn chose.

They chose the ninth floor, the very top of the whole complex. It took only moments for them to be lifted up there and then the doors were opening again. What they saw then didn't even make sense for the layout of the building. They were entering what appeared to be an enormous cathedral. Gold gilded the walls and ceiling. Niches held statues of various divine creatures and prophets. To call it a cathedral would greatly diminish the intersectionality of it all as it appeared that religious symbolism from all corners of the world had a place here. Decorated prayer mats adorned the floor, a Shinto arch framed the way in from the elevator, and a bronze font sat on the side of the entrance. There were other forms of symbolism the party had never seen before and too many to list. A figure dressed in black, white and gold robes, with alabaster skin and golden horns, swept towards them and bowed, golden jewellery dangling from their neck. It was quite clear that this dragon hoarded religion. Sydryn was immediately disgusted by the sight of their peer. They scowled at them as they approached but stepped forward to greet them. “Azeros,” Sydryn addressed. “We've come to use your space.” “What kind of greeting is that to your superior?” Azeros said, getting even closer to Syd and taking their arm. “Good morning. Blessed be the day.” Sydryn was clearly using everything in their power not to spit in the face of this dragon. “Good morning.” “Please. Do you really want to carry that negativity to our offspring?” Azeros asked, placing a hand on Sydryn's stomach. The doctor immediately snapped and grabbed Azeros's arm, twisting it backwards. “Don't you ever touch me.” Azeros groaned in pain and pulled their arm away when Sydryn's grip eased. “You haven’t introduced me to your companions.” Sydryn glowered and pointed between Ruben and Dante. “That one's the lover and that one's the bonded. You can determine the rest.” Azeros rolled their eyes and pushed past Sydryn to their visitors. Köbi was absolutely over the moon in this great hall of religious symbols and artefacts. Dusty was very much the opposite. “Angel, welcome,” Azeros said eyeing Köbi in an almost lustful manner. “It is an honour to have you here in my domain.” Köbi beamed. “Your collection is very impressive. I feel like I'm in...well. If I can't say in front of the humans...” Dante and Ruben both looked at him curiously. “I understand,” Azeros said. “Make yourself at home here.” They moved on to Dusty. “You are also very welcome here. There are many religions who worship the demon. Perhaps after the unbinding, you would chose to stay with me. Both of you.” “Not in your wildest dreams,” Dusty stated glaring at the dragon. “There's no way I'd even consider having a sleepover with someone Syd clearly hates so much.” Köbi didn’t say anything, clearly considering the option. Azeros chuckled. “Sydryn loves me. Our fates have always been intertwined.” “I couldn't loathe you more,” Sydryn stated. “And you think talking to me like that will allow you to use my home?” Azeros asked. “No.” Sydryn looked up at the other. “I know carrying your eggs inside me gives me the right to use your home.” “Now, now...” Azeros withdrew a bit. “You know we all agreed long ago on repopulation terms. You're not the only pregnant dragon right now.” “I agreed to repopulate. I did not chose to repopulate with you,” Sydryn stated pointedly. “Not to mention, you don’t have to carry any eggs. You get to sit around comfortably watching the rest of us suffer.” “I was run through in battle,” Azeros reminded them. “Isn’t that suffering enough?” Sydryn set their jaw and muttered. “You should’ve perished and saved us our suffering…” Azeros rolled their eyes and sighed. “Second eldest always repopulates with the eldest,” they stated. “These rules are known.” “These rules are nonsense,” Sydryn said. “The only factor to consider when choosing partners is whether or not the dragons are related.” “So we're partners?” Azeros said, smiling. “Barely mates.” Köbi raised a hand. “I don't mean to interrupt, but we're losing the morning.” “Right. This way,” Azeros said, waving them down the centre of the hall. The centre was setup as if morning mass was about to begin, but they passed the pews and behind the altar to a much smaller room beyond. The ceiling was still high and vaulted. The room was an opalescent white and carved with unknown ruins. There was a large stone table in the centre of the room the size of a king sized bed. An altar at the back held a large codex bound in leather hundreds of years old. Slots in the domed ceiling allowed for sunlight to pass through stained glass windows, though the imagery in the windows were not the biblical narratives one expects. Instead it depicted scenes of creatures and monsters of all sorts: dragons, demons, angels, centaurs, mermaids, giants, griffins, kappa, kitsune, Jotun, and so on. “What religion is this room for?” Dante asked. “Prodigean,” Azeros said, grinning as they stepped behind the altar. “A very ancient power dedicated to the worship and management of monsters.” Köbi frowned. “I don't fancy the term...” “Of course you wouldn't,” Dusty said. “This is probably the first time anyone's called you that.” “Demons are monsters,” Köbi argued. “Angels are the opposite so we can't possibly be monsters too.” “Have you ever considered we're just two sides of the exact same coin?” Dusty asked. “Absurd.” “Now, I've had to make some modifications to the ritual we are performing,” Azeros stated. “The original would require the human to perish but I’ve merged it with a lifesaving ritual so all should go swimmingly.” “Whoa, hold on a minute,” Ruben stopped. “You merged it? You’re talking about this fatal ritual like some kind of soup recipe you can just throw a couple extra onions in. Aren’t rituals, like, pretty fucking strict about what you can and can’t do?” “Child, I have studied religion and rituals for centuries before your grandfather was even a sperm in his father’s scrotum,” Azeros stated. “I know the limitations.” “You better because this is my partner’s life we’re talking about here,” Ruben growled. Azeros approached Ruben and took his chin in their thin clawed hand. The dragon leered deeply into the human’s eyes but Ruben didn’t waver. Azeros released him and turned to Sydryn. “My dear, when you told me they were in a lover’s quarrel, I had my doubts about this working, but this child is absolutely madly in love. He’s perfect.” Ruben and Dante both glanced at each other, turned away, and blushed. Azeros’s joy only grew. “There’s no faith greater than trusting one’s life to another. Köbi, please look over this tome with me.” “Right.” The angel walked over beside the dragon and read through the ritual they were to perform. From beyond another door, Sydryn was wheeling in IV equipment, including a reclining medical bed, a pole and empty blood bags. They’d also changed into scrubs and they were probably the brightest pink scrubs anyone had ever seen. “Ruben, please join me here.” Ruben walked over and sat down as the doctor got set up. “Forgot you were a licensed doctor for a second… So I’m giving blood the old fashion way then.” “No, the old fashion way would be the way that book describes it,” Sydryn said. “We’d just cut open your palm and Dante’s with some rusty old knife, and make you clasp them tightly together, just hoping your blood would enter his. It’s barbaric and likely to get you killed. This way,” they held up the IV bag, “is definitely the newest way of doing things.” “Geez.” Ruben rubbed his arm. “I’m 33, not 303. IV is the old fashion way to me…” “Being the only way in your lifetime doesn’t make it old,” Sydryn stated. “Put your legs up and your arm out.” Dante went over and sat on the edge of the table nearest the blood donation. He kissed Ruben’s head as the doctor checked his boyfriend’s temperature. “Thank god you’re not my brother. You’d have to knock him out to get blood out of Lino.” “Trust me, I am always glad I’m not your brother,” Ruben stated. Sydryn finished up checking his health then sterilised the the skin over the vein they were going to use. “Count back from five.” “How much are you tak—Ow. Fuck, man,” Ruben complained. “A pint. It’s not my fault you didn’t count,” Sydryn said, taping down the needle now stuck into Ruben’s arm. A machine on a trolley nearby cradled the the IV bag and appeared to rock the blood out of Ruben’s arm. Dante gagged and looked away. Ruben frowned. “You too then?” “I’m not afraid of needles like Lino. I just don’t like seeing blood…” “Then you might want to close your eyes for the whole ritual,” Azeros input, looking up from the codex. “It is entirely blood based.” Dante paled a bit but Ruben rubbed his shoulder with his free arm. “You’re going to be fine,” Ruben said. “You’ll have my blood in you from now on.” “No, Dante’s body will have replaced the blood in about a hundred to a hundred and twenty days,” Sydryn corrected. “It’s the demon’s blood which has lived inside him for so long.” “Wait…” Ruben frowned. “So this whole bonding thing is because Dusty’s blood is inside Dante’s? Would that have any affect on Marco?” “The child? Did you even take basic biology in school?” Sydryn asked. “Actually, no. I didn’t,” Ruben said. Not finishing high school was always a soft spot for him. Dante ran his hand through Ruben’s hair. “Only my DNA was passed on to Marco. Not the contents of my blood. Only Yori’s blood could’ve had an affect on Marco, but I don’t even know if Yori has blood…” “He doesn’t,” Sydryn stated. “What’s a Yori?” Köbi asked getting curious. “Dog spirit.” “A spirit you say?” Azeros asked, interest also peaked. “Like a ghost or a god?” “Wouldn’t you like to know,” Sydryn scoffed. They left the room for a moment only to bring back cookies for Ruben. It took another ten minutes for the bag to fill, and then Ruben was cleaned up and they were ready to start the ritual.

#lore #Sydryn #Köbi #Dante #Dusty #Ruben #Azeros #dragon #demon #angel #new character

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canonicallyanxious · 6 years ago

Text

“i never lose your stuff.”

Untitled Original Project | Jessie Yang/Sydney Walker | 1.2k words

It’s Femslash February and it’s Valentine’s Day!!! I wanted to do something to celebrate, so even though I haven’t written much recently i do have a tiny thing to offer - a little pre-canon sketch of some of my oc’s from a story i’m currently working on. In this scene, Jessie is 14, and Sydney is 13. Please enjoy! <33

Jessie loves track meets, loves them with all her heart, she really does. The warming up, the racing, the spectating, and also surrounding herself with people who are almost as intense about track and field as she is. She always tells her coach she kind of wishes track meets happened every day, and her coach always says that if they actually were every day she’d be wanting to quit the sport entirely within the week. But as amazing and wondrous and brilliant as Coach T is, between the two of them there’s only one person who can see inside herself, and even if no one else in the world believes her, she at least knows the truth, and that’s pretty much all that’s ever mattered to her.

The one part of track meets she loves a little less than the rest of it - just a little - is the before part. Not the warming up, but the getting ready. There’s plenty of other people who probably hate that part, too, because the nerves can be especially bad in the locker room when you’re surrounded with your competition and there’s absolutely no one to talk to and all you can really do is wait until your time to go out on the track.

That’s not her reason, though.

Her reason is that it’s so fucking boring.

Honestly if she could just come here and run in her street clothes she’d do it. But jeans and long loose hair in the wind aren’t particularly conducive to winning a gold medal, and she likes winning gold medals too much to actually risk trying. So here she is, yanking through the snarling tangles of her hair to manhandle the mess into something that won’t get in the way - a tight ponytail, usually, but with her thick and smooth hair it takes way more bobby pins than it should - and biting her tongue so she doesn’t scream out loud. It’s a bit early for that kind of thing, she knows.

There’s a light tap on her shoulder, and she twists around to see who it is. It’s a black girl who’s a couple inches shorter than her, treble clef necklace gleaming in the overhead lights and heels of her velcroed shoes pressed neatly together.

“Hey, Jessie,” the girl says, beaming.

“Syd!” Jessie surges forward to wrap her in a big, gangly-armed hug. Syd huffs a laugh into her shoulder as she staggers back from the force of it, and that’s how Jessie knows she doesn’t mind the surprise attack. “What are you doing here?”

“That’s what you always say,” Syd sniffs as she pulls away. “Like you’re even surprised at this point.”

And of course she’s right, because she always is. But sometimes pretending to be surprised can feel kind of good. Like they just ran into each other simply because they were meant to.

Syd’s eyes shift to the brush in Jessie’s hand, and then the top of her head, her eyebrows raising. Probably shocked at the complete disaster that is Jessie’s attempt to tie her stupid hair up.

“I don’t understand,” Syd says. She reaches out to pull her fingers lightly through Jessie’s hair, and tucks a loose strand behind her ear. “You have the straightest hair known to mankind. Why is this so hard for you?”

“You know I’m not good at the girly shit.” Jessie wipes her nose with the back of her hand.

“It’s not girly stuff,” Syd chides. “It’s just - life stuff.”

“Hey, you’re great with life stuff,” Jessie says. She sticks out her hairbrush and smiles at Syd hopefully. “Why don’t you do it?”

Syd shakes her head, though there’s no hiding the smile tugging at her mouth, either. “I swear you do this every time. You can’t always count on me to do your hair for you, Jessie Yang.”

“Please?” Jessie clasps her hands together and pulling her face into an exaggerated pout. It’s not the kind of thing that would work on anyone - Jessie’s not that brand of adorable. But that’s not really the point, is it?

Syd gives her a pointed look - one that lets her know she knows her game exactly - but she reaches out and takes the brush anyway. “Here, turn around,” she says. “You can borrow my scrunchie, ‘cause I don’t think these cheap hair bands are gonna cut it. Just please don’t lose it.”

Syd’s long and careful fingers start pulling through Jessie’s hair, a slow and gentle motion. Already it feels so much better. Jessie lets her eyes slip shut.

“I never lose your stuff,” Jessie says, which is true. She’s losing her own hair bands all the time, every day. But never Syd’s.

“Yeah, I guess that’s true,” Syd says. The brush starts running through Jessie’s hair, pulling at her scalp in a way that tingles not too unpleasantly. “How are you feeling about today, anyway?”

Jessie has to resist the urge to start bouncing on the balls of her feet, thinking about the upcoming races today. Probably wouldn’t help Syd at all. “Good, I’m feeling real good. I think this one’s going to be a piece of cake.”

“Yeah, I think so, too,” Syd says. “It’s nice out but not too hot. Perfect racing weather. And you’ve run against everyone in your division here, right?”

“Yeah,” Jessie says, clenching her hand into a fist. “I’m gonna crush them into dust.”

“Please don’t actually do that,” Syd says. “I don’t want you to go to jail.”

“Metaphorically, though, can I crush them?”

“Metaphorically, you can do whatever you want.” Syd touches her fingers to the back of Jessie’s neck, feather soft. Her hand is cold. “Done-zo.”

“Nice.” Jessie whirls around and hugs Syd again, mostly because she can’t help herself. Syd’s hands come up and rest under her shoulder blades, warm and reassuring. Not that she needs the comfort, honestly, because she’s not usually in the habit of getting nerves before a race. But - it’s nice, still. It’s proof that someone believes in her - that someone wants to believe in her. And if that person is Syd, all the better.

Some days she wakes up with Syd’s faith tucked snugly under her collarbone and she knows she could do just about anything in the whole entire world.

Jessie leans back, placing her hands on Syd’s shoulders and grinning down at her. “Thanks,” she says.

Syd smiles back, one of those that touches the corners of her eyes more than her mouth; it’s warm, like the sun, and as sincere as the truth. “You’re gonna do great, Jessie,” she says, and goes on her tip-toes so she can press a quick peck to Jessie’s cheek. The customary good luck kiss. Jessie feels herself grin wider at the gesture.

“Waffle House after?” Jessie says, just to be sure.

Syd shakes her head and laughs. She turns and moves to leave the room, twisting her head back around to shoot one last smile at Jessie. “Do you even have to ask?” she calls out behind her, making a jaunty little salute as her farewell.

Jessie turns around to face her locker, the warmth of her own smile still lingering on her face and in her chest.

Yes. The answer is always yes.

#femslash february #sarah does writing #i don't actually expect anyone to read this lol but i had fun writing this so i wanted to share it #i don't think it's going to make it into the story at large but it's fun to sketch out their relationship a little #also it's not particularly romantic for v day but like its what i've got so

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thoughtsmadnessandmusic-blog · 7 years ago

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My Top 50 Songs of 2017

Rules and disclaimers:

No more than five songs per artist, and no more than two songs from the same album/EP. Features count as a song for each named artist. I will try to link the songs to their headers where possible. For songs fifty through twenty-one there will be a short quip; the top twenty will have a more detailed discussion.

This list is subjective, as should be obvious. If you don't like this years, maybe you’ll like next years. In the interest of sharing cool tracks, I will list some honourable mentions that didn’t make the list as I heard them too late for consideration. Some songs (and their videos) contain explicit lyrics and imagery.

Honourable Mentions

Wolf Alice �� Yuk Foo

Chromeo – Juice

Rina Sawayama – Alterlife

Sampha – (No One Knows Me) Like The Piano

50. Tyler, The Creator – I Ain’t Got Time

The percussion on this track, especially the first half, is just sublime. Shout out to the random shakers on the chorus.

49. Syd – All About Me

From one member of Odd Future to another, this song somehow straddles the line between chill and hard, and pulls it off.

48. T-Pain & Lil Wayne – Listen To Me

Who would have thought sampling the ‘Oompa Loompa song’ would sound so hard?

47. Belly – Man Listen

Belly makes some hype music, but his rhyming on this first verse should not go unnoticed. Quality track, with a catchy melody.

46. HAIM – Nothing’s Wrong

The “tell-t-tell me” in the background of the chorus is one of the best things to happen in music this year.

45. Kacy Hill – Hard To Love

The swell of this song, combined with a chorus that only grows larger each time you hear it, makes for 80s infused pleasure.

44. T-Pain & Lil Wayne – Heavy Chevy

This song is just so, damn, southern.

43. Kacy Hill – Arm’s Length

Kacy Hill’s vocal performance on this track is exceptional, and that chorus hits like a truck.

42. Calvin Harris – Slide (Ft. Frank Ocean & Migos)

If you had told me at the start of the year that Calvin Harris would produce some of the smoothest tracks of the year, I would have called you insane. But, here we are. I’d like to give a special shout out to that pitched up vocal sample for being everything that’s right in the world.

41. Travis Scott – Butterfly Effect

The catchy chorus here is accented perfectly by the switch up for the rap verse, which may be my favourite part of the track.

40. Vince Staples – BagBak

Vince Staple’s fusion of electronic music with hip-hop adds a constant sense of movement to a track dripping with political critique and comments on racial inequality.

39. Action Bronson – The Chairman’s Intent

Action Bronson always comes through with constant bars, flow and charisma, so throwing in a catchy refrain is just putting the cherry on top.

Highlight: “I started clapping when the chef brought the duck to the table

Uh, that shit was shining like an angel”.

38. Syd – Body

I’m not sure I fully appreciated how smooth, and sexy, this song was until I began planning this list. The whole track is coercive, and the break down after the chorus serves to let you settle in before the ride continues.

37. Raekwon – My Corner (Ft. Lil Wayne)

First and foremost, I’d like to address the fantastic snare that anchors this track. Secondly, I’d like to remind everyone that Wayne murders his feature, with a flow that just glides through rhyme after rhyme.

36. Lorde – Green Light

Yes, this song is making damn near every list, and with good reason. Lorde’s imagery is superb, and the way this song builds musically is something to behold.

35. DJ Khaled – It’s Secured (Ft. Travis Scott & Nas)

Travis Scott’s hook is phenomenal, anchoring Nas’ vivid lyricism and capitalising on the hype of the instrumental. Maybe we need Travis Scott on more Nas songs?

34. Gucci Mane – Curve (Ft. The Weeknd)

Gucci and The Weeknd suit each other so very well, creating a song that never stops flowing, and revels in its debauchery.

33. Sabrina Claudio – Unravel Me

Alright, why did I have to discover Sabrina Claudio through Spotify radio? How is this track not being plastered over every R&B fan’s Twitter, Facebook and Instagram accounts? If I hadn’t found this song so late in the year there’s a good chance it would have landed higher on this list. What a beautiful track.

32. Japanese Breakfast – Machinist

The first time I heard this song is by far my favourite ‘what the fuck’ moment of the year. Add a saxophone solo on top and you have a fantastic track.

31. Lady Gaga – The Cure

I can’t get this chorus out of my head and I don’t want to. Now, that may be aided by the fact that I picture Lady Gaga dancing like an 80s robot while delivering the lyrics, but I can live with that.

30. Cam’ron – D.I.A.

This is some classic Dipset, from the beat to Cam’ron’s nonchalant dismantling of every other rapper’s brag.

Highlight: “50 keys in the tub, that's a real bird bath”.

29. Stormzy – Cold

I love how dramatically hard this beat is, and Stormzy’s refrain “I've been cold the whole season, I should call my next one "Freezing"” is such an excellent, tongue in cheek, cap on the chorus.

28. Injury Reserve – Boom (X3)

Is this the hardest chorus of 2017? Yes, yes it is.

27. Future – Comin Out Strong (Ft. The Weeknd)

Honestly, at this point we need a Weeknd x Future project. The Weeknd is his usual, swaggering self, and Future comes with some surprising intensity and entertaining adlibs.

26. Stormzy – Big For Your Boots

Combine Stormzy’s raw personality on the mic with another catchy hook, and you have a track with insane replay value.

25. Rick Ross – Trap Trap Trap (Ft. Young Thug & Wale)

This song is plain hard. Rick Ross’ change up in flow and voice on his first verse hit perfectly, and Young Thug’s personality complements the track superbly. Throw in some great bars from Wale and you get one of the best trap tracks of the year.

24. N.E.R.D – Lemon (Ft. Rihanna)

The production on this track is incredible, and words can’t describe how badly I want a straight up rap album from Rihanna.

23. The Killers – Run For Cover

The lead single from ‘Wonderful Wonderful’ hits with a fantastic chorus and lyrics that attack the current (or constant) political climate. I’d be remiss to not acknowledge how much this song reminds me of “When We Were Young”, one of my favourite Killer’s tracks.

22. Young Thug & Carnage – Homie (Ft. Meek Mill)

Wait, one second, I might have to revisit my comment on the hardest chorus of 2017... Even if Young Thug does sound like the Cookie Monster.

21. Vince Staples – Big Fish (Ft. Juicy J)

I do love a Juicy J chorus, not to mention a beat with a groove like this. Place a smooth flow from Vince Staples on top and you’ve got a track that will always move your head.

20. Frank Ocean – Chanel

This song has already received accolades from many publications, and the symbolic use of the Chanel logo to frame Frank Ocean’s exploration into the duality of things is surprisingly powerful. Yes, Frank Ocean is a fantastic writer, but this track serves to demonstrate how the mainstream, both in terms of pop culture and music, can be explored and appropriated to analyse deeper social issues. More than that, the fantastic second verse where Frank Ocean belts his lungs out is one of the most cathartic moments in music this year, and serves to remind the listener of how excellent a vocalist he is.

19. HAIM – Want You Back

HAIM’s ‘Want You Back’ was one of the tracks that grew on me the most this year, it’s infectious, 80’s infused sound constantly weaving its way back into my rotation. It’s a song that builds, starting stripped back, and minimalist, before exploding into the chorus with layered vocals, percussion, and some impressively effective vocal samples. There is a certain swagger to the verses here, tying the personality of the band with the sound they create, giving the track it’s smooth movement, and self-assurance. Yes, the relationship is over, but this song is sure in its desire for it to return, and knows it will succeed.

18. A$AP Ferg – Plain Jane

This song is so very addictive. A straight up flexing anthem, ‘Plain Jane’ lands this high on the list for Ferg’s impeccable use of flow. For this kind of track to be effective it needs an MC to bring confidence, swagger, and mic presence that owns the beat and owns who they are. A$AP Ferg executes this perfectly, gliding along the beat to hit all the right points alongside the percussion, and flipping his flow just enough on the chorus to provide a catchy break. It’s a comfortable, commanding presence, accented by a hard beat that is just that bit quicker, and more rhythmically consistent, than the typical trap affair.

17. Lorde – Perfect Places

If any song on this list could be said to have captured what 2017 felt like as a year, especially how it felt for the younger generation, this was it. ‘Perfect Places’ is a masterful display of song writing, diving headfirst into the need for escape in a world that is constantly hammering at our doors. Yes, it deals with the timeless insecurity of becoming a young adult, but more than that it acknowledges the “graceless”, constant nature of it all. There is a distinct helplessness to it all, and as heroes fade what else is there to do but search for an escape? And that’s just the lyrics. The gorgeous production hits like a wall on the chorus, and the synth that accents the refrain is simply stunning. The defining moment of the track, however, is the smallest. Lorde’s mouthed, clicking trigger, where the metaphorical gun that is this song is cocked before exploding into the chorus.

16. Young Thug – Relationship (Ft. Future)

‘Relationship’ contains one of the most exactly crafted choruses of the year. Young Thug begins it, providing his trademark charisma and vocal inflections, and singing in a way that is evidently building to something. Then the beat drops and hits exactly on the first line from Future, signalling the change to more euphoric lyrics from the artist. The rhymes that follow are consistent, but it’s that rising melody that Future provides that will get stuck in your head for days. Once some solid, quotable verses are added, and this song is full of quotable lyrics, it’s back to the chorus, and back to one of the best moments in music this year.

15. PLAZA – Personal

There’s nothing like some good, autotuned debauchery. Plaza’s ‘Personal’ is a vibe; a constant, wavering scent of smoke on the air, smoke that rests deep in your lungs. It’s the taste on your lips the next morning, and the broken, bleary smile given before an early departure. Indeed, it’s the OVO sound through and through. PLAZA flows over the beat smoothly, providing a simple, catchy refrain, that epitomises the song, and the mindset of lust over reason. The song is accepting of this, acknowledging that perhaps the pursuit of carnal pleasure is not entirely good or bad, but simply feels right.

14. Drake – 4422 (Ft. Sampha)

To call this a Drake song seems disingenuous. Even if it was part of the ‘More Life’ package, this is a Sampha song, albeit one fitting of the Drake catalogue. A gorgeous vocal performance from Sampha, ‘4422’ is beautiful in its simplicity. It’s a track that resonates due to its blatant need for any amount of commitment that is not forthcoming. Why? We don’t know. No one knows, because sometimes these moments, and feelings, are inexplicable hunches. They are the twists of the stomach, when we know what feels right, and what doesn’t, but we can’t reconcile the issue and so slip into anxious turmoil. Sampha knows this, and he wants it to end, if only they could meet halfway.

13. Drake – KMT (Ft. Giggs)

I could not stop listening to ‘KMT’ this year. It’s just such an easy, catchy listen. The beat is your standard trap banger, albeit those on beat drums in the introduction are somewhat unique and build the tension excellently. For that matter, the strings themselves are catchy and tension inducing as well. At the end of the day, however, the reason this song is up so high is because it’s just so damn fun to listen to. The lyrics are quotable and often silly or over the top. The flows are catchy, yes, even the ones borrowed from other rappers. Furthermore, Giggs’ voice and adlibs suit the track perfectly, and it all builds to one of the most hype listens of the year. Trust me, if you want to have some fun, crank the speakers and just let yourself be taken away by this track.

12. Kendrick Lamar – HUMBLE.

How much really needs to be said about Kendrick’s ‘HUMBLE.’? The track that cemented Kendrick as the biggest name in rap sees him step into a lane more pop orientated, but yet still viciously lyrical. The beat, courtesy of Mike WiLL Made-It, is not quite the normal trap affair, focusing instead on a staccato piano line that in a lot of ways reminds me of the more simplistic, yet catchy, early 2000s hip-hop beats. It hits perfectly, and Kendrick steps into it with ease, diving in and out of the beat with one of his catchiest flows yet. To top it off the song is filled with quotable lines that you have no doubt seen plastered all over social media, and with good reason. This song is tongue in cheek fun, with just a hint of a more serious edge to it, and I love it.

11. Jay-Z – The Story of O.J.

The best way to experience this song is with the phenomenal video (linked in the title above) which does a remarkable job of conveying the ideas of the track. A journey into the mindset of a fiscally responsible Jay-Z, ‘The Story of O.J.’ attempts to address the need for wise financial decision making to pull people, especially those discriminated against, out of the world they find themselves in. Yet, throughout it all, Jay-Z makes it clear that no matter the success he, or others around him, might experience, they will still be seen in the same, racist light. For a song that attempts to offer hope it is a bitter taste, suggesting that although over time things will change, for now the colour of your skin will still alter people’s perception of you. All of this is delivered over an immaculate beat from No I.D., complete with an incredible sample and tight, punchy drums.

10. PLAZA – Run This

The way this track builds is nothing short of brilliant. It opens up with PLAZA lamenting his interactions with a girl, his reverb soaked voice echoing over stuttering synths. And then the hats come in, and you know those incredible kicks are about to hit. Those three, perfectly timed kicks, hitting on the start of his line like a truck. The track then builds further, the element of ambition and desire slipping into PLAZA’s vocals, the melody switches up, and further synths come in. But then the song pauses for the briefest of moments, the chorus hits, and PLAZA slips into one of the catchiest melodies of the year. It’s flawless, intoxicatingly arrogant, hype, and so very replayable.

9. Bob Dylan – Making A Liar Out Of Me (Rehearsal)

When Bob Dylan released a new bootleg series, I knew there’d be something good on there, and I wasn’t let down. ‘Making A Liar Out Of Me’ is Dylan at his poetic best, delivering line after line of vivid images and scathing critiques. Of much debate is who this song is aimed at. Is it a lost lover? A politician he had faith in? Higher ups in the church that have been abusing their position of power? God, and Dylan’s faith itself? Or, even, Dylan himself? Yes, this track comes from Dylan’s Gospel era, but it’s using that hint of Christianity to inform it’s critique, to build a pastiche of this person who has horribly let him down. I could simply paste the whole song’s lyrics here and leave you to make your own peace with the track, and in essence that is what I’ll do, but I’ll leave you with a personal highlight of mine:

“Well I say that, that ain't flesh and blood you're drinking

In the wounded empire of your fool's paradise

With a light above your head forever blinking

Turning virgins into merchandise”.

8. dvsn – Conversations In A Diner

I’m unsure how many people would have chosen the closer off dvsn’s ‘Morning After’ to land this high on their year end list, but more certainly should have. It is a beautiful end to a stunning record. The vocal performance from Daniel Daley is gentle, delicate and absolutely embodies the love he is attempting to convey. ‘Morning After’ was an album about struggling to keep a relationship going, and to capture those moments of perfection that remained, and this song is a heartfelt promise to continue trying. It’s an exceptionally mature end to the album, accented by some beautiful piano and a perfectly timed choir.

7. Jay-Z – Bam (Ft. Damian Marley)

This is straight up, uncompromising, old school, braggadocios Jay-Z. Over a beat that contains another excellent sample and fantastic drums (shouts out to No I.D. once more), Jay reminisces on the actions that lead him to where he is today. It’s an acknowledgement of the ego that allowed him to succeed, and it contains some of the most vivid images and best lines on ‘4:44’. Damian Marley’s feature is superb, fitting well with the sample, and his charisma builds off Jay’s perfectly. The highlight of the track for me is the superb transition from chorus to verse, where Jay shouts over the last line of the chorus: “Fuck all this pretty Shawn Carter shit n****, HOV”. It brings so much energy to the track and stylistically harkens back to ‘Public Service Announcement’ off ‘The Black Album’.

6. Roy Woods – Instinct (Ft. MadeinTYO)

A track that came out very late in 2016 on Roy Woods’ ‘Nocturnal’ EP (and thus qualifies for this list), I rediscovered the song when the music video dropped earlier this year. Up until that point I hadn’t realised how fantastic the drop on the first verse was, but Roy Woods going crazy in the video certainly opened my eyes. From then on this track was inescapable for me; I’d keep starting it off, listening to those intro lines from Roy Woods, and waiting for the drop. To this day, when that kick hits, and the flow switches, I can’t help but move. It’s the rhythm of this track that really leaves it sticking in my mind, from Roy’s upbeat, braggadocios lyrics and flow, to MadeinTYOs more laid back, controlled cockiness. Throw in a few more quotable, sometimes ridiculous lines (You ain’t got sauce like I got sauce”), and you easily have one of my favourite tracks of the year.

5. dvsn – Body Smile

Another gorgeous song by dvsn, ‘Body Smile’ sees Daniel Daley once more flexing his vocal chops to make up for the things he has done to break his lover’s heart. Of course, he’s not going to make up for them simply by singing, he’s going to make up for it with a night of, apparently, the most passionate, loving sex, ever conceived (no pun intended). Perhaps that is a ridiculous sentiment, but then, in an album dripping in the raw physicality of a relationship, it makes perfect sense. It’s about marrying the emotional with the physical, recognising sex as capable of being more than just enjoyable, but rather as being an honest, unhindered expression of love. That’s just the context of the song. The production itself is slow, ebbing and seductive, culminating in a stellar vocal performance on the final chorus. Then there’s the pre-chorus, which contains one of my favourite vocal melodies and rhythms of the year, with the way it slinks through each word, as if Daniel Daley is trying to skip through the wrongs, but proceeding to get more and more caught up on his mistakes. Yet, all of this song culminates in the last two lines of the chorus, where Daley stops belting, the instrumentation dies down, and we get a beautiful, seductive, pleading falsetto. It’s stripped back, raw, and honest, just as the song is supposed to be.

4. Bleachers – Don’t Take The Money

Jack Antonoff had a big year, but amongst all his writing for other artists he found time to record an exceptional pop song of his own. ‘Don’t Take The Money’ is an undeniable anthem, painting the stress of being in a relationship with vivid metaphors and a mammoth chorus. It attempts to deal with the constant anxiety that comes from being in a relationship, especially, perhaps, when it is not going so well. What if this incredible person disappears? What happens to me? What if they take the metaphorical money and run? It’s an uncertainty fuelled track that acknowledges the incredible nature of love by recognising how fragile it is. Then there is the fantastic, aching production, that grows into a huge, passionate chorus. The percussion, and use of bells, accents it all so well, and it’s the moments when the instrumentation calms that you notice just how textured it is.

3. The Killers – Tyson vs Douglas

There is so much I want to say, or feel I could say, about this song. First, I want to make it clear how great the instrumentation is. The driving guitar and dramatic synth; the way Brandon Flowers voice screams out the chorus. The sheer size and blatant anxiety of the chorus. It all feels cinematic, as if capturing that final punch and replaying it again and again. But, that’s not really the point. The point is that in front of that TV set was a generation of boys realising their heroes, and, perhaps, father figures, were not invincible. In a world that can be so absurdly masculine, they were witnessing just how fragile it all really was. And that’s not to say it’s bad, but it is a loss of innocence. A realisation that their father, or hero, is fallible, and that sometimes they will break down. They will lose. They will cry. This is a world outside of the conception of a child, and here it is happening in front of them, again and again. It’s a feeling of helplessness because it acknowledges how little control anyone can have over the world around them. In the bridge Brandon Flowers sings “you said it was nothing, but maybe you’re wrong”, because he realises it wasn’t nothing. Every boys view of the world changes when they see their hero, or father, fall, and this song perfectly captures that moment. Incredible.

2. Kendrick Lamar – DNA.

It’s so rare to see a rapper absolutely snap on a track, and on ‘DNA.’ Kendrick lets loose. A track that deals with everything that Kendrick believes makes both him who he is, and makes every other person on the planet what they are, DNA. is a vivid portrayal of the complexities of black culture and the way it is perceived. This idea is demonstrated just before the beat switch, when Kendrick samples a comment from Geraldo Rivera in which he claims that ‘this is why I say that hip hop has done more damage to young African Americans than racism in recent years’. An idea, that aside from being utterly ridiculous, serves as ammunition for a vicious final verse from Kendrick in which he berates the cheapening, and pigeonholing, of black culture, and makes it clear that who he is is something to be proud of.

1. Carly Rae Jepsen – Cut To The Feeling

‘Cut To The Feeling’ has been my number one song of the year since the day I heard it. No other song released this year is so euphoric, so infectious, so bouncy, or so downright undeniable. It provides moment after moment of highlights, and is quite possibly the best produced track of the year. The song starts simply enough, a nice, catchy clap rhythm, building to the vocals, but as soon as the vocals start, everything begins growing. The kicks come in, and Jepsen delivers some staccato vocal melodies with their assistance, before disappearing into a shuddering, building ‘oh’. An ‘Oh’ that takes us to a chorus. The chorus. The kicks hit, the synths and bass swell, and Carly Rae Jepsen sings her damn lungs out. The melody is shoutable, it’s catchy, and its rhythm matches every jump you’ll be making as you dance along. It’s the second half of the chorus that really drives it home for me, where somehow the song grows even larger, and Jepsen sings “I wanna play where you play with the angels”, hitting the word ‘angels’ in the most, well, angelic way possible. Yet, every line delivered in the song hits perfectly, so for me to even highlight them is almost unnecessary. That’s what this song does so very well, every musical aspect is in complete harmony. An outstanding effort in pop music, and without a doubt my top song of 2017.

#music #topsongs #2017

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pahketz · 8 years ago

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1. Is there a boy/girl in your life? Kinda, idk what’s happening right now tho 2. Think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them? I don’t remember who last hurt me so I guess I forgive them? 3. What do you think of when you hear the word “meow”? Cats? what else am I supposed to think? 4. What’s something you really want right now? Either to be away from school forever or Torchy’s 5. Are you afraid of falling in love? With the wrong person yes, or with someone who doesn’t love me 6. Do you like the beach? I fucking love the beach. not Galveston beach tho, it’s ugly 7. Have you ever slept on a couch with someone else? Probably, I don’t remember 8. What’s the background on your cell? It was a generic metallic grey sheet, but now its a cartoon solar system, cuz space is rad 9. Name the last four beds you were sat on? Wtf? My college bed, my home bed, and idk any others 10. Do you like your phone? Yea, the screen’s acting up and a 7 Plus would be nice, but overall I like it 11. Honestly, are things going the way you planned? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no 12. Who is the last person whose phone number you added to your phone? Dude named DJ, he’s alright I guess 13. Would you rather have a poodle or a Rottweiler? Por que no los dos? 14. Which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain? Well usually emotional lasts longer, but nothing matches the pain of stubbing your pinky toe 15. Would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum? Zoo, definitely 16. Are you tired? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA I’m always tired 17. How long have you known your 1st phone contact? If it’s alphabetical then since middle school, but if it’s the 1st number I added to my phone then since Pre-K ish 18. Are they a relative? I’m assuming you’re asking about 17, no they aren’t 19. would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes? Only been one, idk she was super religious which wasn’t my cup of tea but it was nice to have someone that cared about me like that. I’m not really sure 20. When did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with? 30 minutes ago ish 21. If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today? Bitch I don’t even know if the socks I’m wearing are the socks I want to keep wearing. Also my life is kinda held together by thumb tacks and scotch tape, so probably not today 22. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Definitely 23. How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now? zero, i’m lame 24. Is there a certain quote you live by? “I have no idea what is going on around me, and I’m kinda scared to ask anyone about it”-Me, just now 25. What’s on your mind? Why is there so much trash in the corner of my room? 26. Do you have any tattoos? No, I hate needles. If I didn’t I’d probably get a few 27. What is your favorite color? The color of the blood of my enemies. Or blue 28. Next time you will kiss someone on the lips? I don’t even know what time it is right now, and there’s a clock right in front of me. but hopefully soon 29. Who are you texting? A friend needing a ride back from a party 30. Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch? Such a specific question, I don’t think so 31. Have you ever had the feeling that something bad was going to happen and you were right? Probably I can’t think of an example off the top of my head tho 32. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to? I’m pretty sure I do 33. Do you think anyone has feelings for you? If they do they should tell me cuz I’m oblivious af 34. Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes? Everyday cuz my eyes are pretty af 35. Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you? “The last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?” Weird question but ok 36. Were you single on Valentine’s Day? Single on V Day for the past 18 years 37. Are you friends with the last person you kissed? I hope so otherwise I have no idea what’s going on 38. What do your friends call you? Oh boy... Pahketz. not funny. nerd. gay. a waste of space. nobody will ever love you. why are you talking to us. you know, the funny stuff... 39. Has anyone upset you in the last week? Texas A&M University 40. Have you ever cried over a text? No, men don’t cry because of our fragile masculinity 41. Where’s your last bruise located? No clue 42. What is it from? No idea, I try to exert as little effort as possible, which leads to very minimal bruising 43. Last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad? right fucking now 44. Who was the last person you were on the phone with? My mommy :) 45. Do you have a favorite pair of shoes? I only have 3 pairs of shoes so I guess not 46. Do you wear a hat if you’re having a bad hair day? I wear a hat every day, so take that as you will 47. Would you ever go bald if it was in style? almost went bald junior year, it sucked. no 48. Do you make supper for your family? No, but I like to bake occasionally 49. Does your bedroom have a door? What kind of bedroom doesn’t have a door? AND 50. Top 3 webpages? Youtube, Netflix, Reddit

Thanks Syd :D

#asks

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