#susuru suru

[chichiriwinds]

Prompt #4: Shifting Blame

For FFxivWrite2019

Susuru stepped through the gates of Gridania. How many years has it been? She looked around, glad that this city, like Ul’dah, was rebuilding well. She walked towards Carline Canopy, glad to see many people hustling about, going on their daily lives. Though it was almost five long years since the Calamity, she had no doubt that it was still fresh in their minds. Just like it was in hers.

“One room please.” She said to the innkeep once she arrived. She glanced to the side as she followed him to her room. There Miounne was, talking to a group of whom she presumed to be new adventurers, a small line behind them. Ul’dah too had seen an influx of them in the last few years. She smiled.

She left her room as soon as she unpacked her belongings. Though the room was spacious and comfortable, she nonetheless felt a little sad that she could not stay with her friend like she had done countless times before. By the gods, Yehsui, where are you? She feared the worst, a sinking feeling that she would never see her again.

“Now there’s a sight for sore eyes. Welcome back to Gridania, my friend.” Miounne’s gentle voice brought a smile to the Lalafell. “Miounne!” She waved. “How wonderful it is to see you hale and whole.”

The pair chatted animatedly about various topics, Gridania, Ul’dah, and the rebuilding taking up most of the conversation. Miounne had even teasingly asked if she had found someone, but the sad smile she got in return told her enough. “My apologies, Susuru.”

The Lalafell shook her head. “It’s quite alright, you didn’t know.” She smiled sadly. “That said, have you—or anyone—seen Yehsui lately? I know she left the Shroud years ago, but...”

Miounne shook her head sadly.

Susuru nodded. Though she had expected that, her heart ached nonetheless. Mayhaps...I should not have encouraged her to leave... Silence fell between the two.

“Would you like to accompany me to Stillglade Fane?” Miounne asked, seemingly out of the blue.

“O-of course!” Susuru forced a smile. Mayhaps...the guild would know more...

* * *

Susuru had never felt particularly comfortable in Stillglade Fane. The atmosphere was always rather stiff to her, though her friend was completely at ease. She felt even less comfortable going anywhere near it since her friend decided to leave the Shroud. After all, she was partially to blame. Yet here she was years later, waiting for the guildmaster in the meditation chamber with Miounne.

“Brother E-Sumi.” The pair greeted as he walked in.

“Welcome. How may I help you?” The padjal smiled gently. “The elementals spoke of your visit. Welcome back to Gridania, Susuru.”

“O-oh! Th-thank you, Brother E-Sumi.” Susuru was not sure what she had expected, but such a warm welcome was not. She bowed courteously. “I wished to ask if you have heard from—or better yet—seen Yehsui lately.” She asked, cutting straight to the heart of the matter.

Miounne smiled sadly. Brother E-Sumi’s expression was unreadable. “Please follow me. There is someone I would like you to meet.”

Despite her better judgement, Susuru felt her hopes rise a little. Could it? No...it can’t be...

The trio turned the corner into what looked like a study area. Susuru’s eyes widened. Though the tips were white, the lone Miqo’te in the room had a head of very familiar blue hair. “Ye-Yehsui...?” She whispered.

The Miqo’te’s ears twitched. She raised her head, her expression curious.

Susuru’s heart fell.

“Brother E-Sumi, Mother Miounne.” The young Miqo’te stood up and bowed in greeting. “How may I be of service?”

“Suzu, I would like you to meet Susuru Suru,” The padjal introduced, “your mother’s friend.”

The Miqo’te nodded. Smiling gently, she bowed. “My name is Suzu, daughter of Yehsui Tayuun. Pleased to meet you, Lady Suru.”

Susuru felt as though the young Keeper knew how disappointed she was. “L-Likewise, Suzu.” She bowed in return, making sure to smile. It was no fault of the young Keeper’s that she was disappointed. “But please, call me Susuru. ‘Lady Suru’ sounds far too formal.”

“A-As you wish, Su-Susuru.” The young Keeper hesitated before adding, “Might...you be here to ask about my mother? I could tell you what I know...”

Susuru nodded. Miounne and Brother E-Sumi excused themselves, wishing to give them some privacy. Susuru had an inkling feeling that the young Keeper has had a fair few people inquire about her mother already. “Mine apologies, Suzu. You must have had many people ask about her already.” She offered a sad smile.

“It is quite alright, I understand.” Suzu smiled. Susuru could not shake the feeling that it was a practiced one, like those merchants like herself used regularly.

They took a seat nearby. “Mayhaps it’s best I begin with where I’m from.” Seeing Susuru’s confused expression, she added. “Unlike my parents, I’m not uh...what’s the word...Forest-born? I’m from Doma.”

“Doma? The Imperial province in Othard?” Susuru asked, surprised. She knew Yehsui had planned to travel to Othard, but she had hoped that she would have returned to Eorzea when Doma fell. Then again, knowing Yehsui, she would have stayed.

Suzu nodded. “I heard, my parents fought for Doma and after the surrender, they remained with the Liberation Front.”

“You heard?” Susuru’s braced herself. The fact that the young Keeper did not know could only mean one thing.

Suzu nodded sadly. “My mother passed shortly after I was born...My father was...captured...when I was around seven summers.”

Her heart sank. Gone. She’s gone.

“My deepest apologies...” The young Keeper bowed deeply. “You...lost your friend because...of me...”

That shook the Lalafell out of her shocked state. Oh gods no. She berated herself for not having a hold on her expressions better. Doubtless many had blamed her throughout her short life. So as mistaken as it was, of course she would blame herself. She shook her hands frantically. “No no, don’t ever blame yourself for something like that! I’m sure your parents were very happy that you were born.”

“Thank you.” Suzu smiled sadly, her head lowered. Though it was probably true, the feeling of guilt nonetheless remained.

Susuru smiled. She could imagine her friend and her husband playing happily with their kit had the gods permitted it. “Who is your father, by the way? You said they were both forestborn?”

Suzu nodded. “His name is Nhaja’to Jinjahl. I heard that he was a...bard?”

Susuru could not help but grin. She should have known. Though she was a spitting image of her mother, the white streaks in her hair and her blue eye were reminiscent of the bard’s. So his feelings finally got through to her. Good.

“My parents...were well-liked among the village I lived in and in the Liberation Front. My...family did not tell me much, but whenever they were mentioned, it was always in a good way.”

Susuru nodded, feeling slightly better. From what she could tell, neither Keeper regretted their paths. And neither should they blame themselves for their fates. She smiled, decided that though the young Keeper was no doubt in good hands, she would like to at least get to know her better. “Pray tell me more about yourself, Suzu.”

Her eyes widened. She was clearly not expecting that. “M-me?”

Susuru nodded. Mayhaps this visit was worth the trip after all.

[chichiriwinds]

Prompt #29: Determination, Support

For FFxivWrite2019

[Previous]

In the years Susuru has known the Keeper, she had always seemed content with her place in the Shroud. To hear her speak of leaving was shocking. “I-I see...” Susuru stammered, having failed in trying to keep her voice even. It must have taken her much courage to voice this thought of hers. She had the impression that the locals do not take kindly to those who leave. It was not forbidden, but it was still something that was probably looked down upon. The last thing she wanted was for her to seem like she too judges her nagatively for it, when it was anything but.

Yehsui frowned, unsure of what to make of that reaction. It was almost as if her friend was trying to keep her true opinion from her. “Do you...do you think it’s a bad idea?” She asked tentatively.

“No!” Susuru exclaimed. Both of them jumped, surprised. She hung her head. “Sorry Yehsui, I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m just surprised. I never thought I’d hear you say something like that.” Realising it could be taken the wrong way, she quickly added, her arms waiving frantically, “I-It’s not a bad thing—in fact, I think it’s a great idea!” She rubbed the back of her head sheepishly. “Well...I am biased...”

Yehsui smiled. Though she had guessed that her friend would approve of such an idea, it was nonetheless a relief to hear her say so.

Sisuru’s expression changed to one of concern. “If I may, Yehsui, what sparked this? Could it have been because of me or Nhaja’to? We meet up every time I’m in town and I’ve seen you with him a lot lately—Thal’s beard I can’t speak properly!” She sighed. Again, what she said could have easily been taken the wrong way. “What I mean is, are you sure? Living in the Shroud and being on the road are very different...and I can’t imagine your guild or fellow Gridanians would be happy about it either...”

Susuru’s concern for her filled her heart with warmth. She looked up at the canopy, her eyes dreamy. “I have thought long and hard about it. I would travel the world, and try to help as many people as I can on my journey. Like Master A-Towa! Wouldn’t it be wonderful if I can be like him?” She turned to her friend. “I have no doubt it’ll be hard. I’ll have to adapt and survive, no longer protected by the Shroud I love. But the more I think about it, the more I feel in my heart it’s what I’m meant to do.” The determination in her eyes was strong, unwavering.

Susuru nodded. Since her friend was so determined, she would do all she can to help her. She gave her a thumbs up. “Alright! Regardless of who planted that idea in your head, you have my support!” Her eyes narrowed, though a teasing glint remained. “Just to be sure, it’s definitely not because of him, right?”

“N-no!” Yehsui’s face flushed a bright red. “Matron preserve, it’s not because of him!”

Susuru burst out laughing. “A jest, it’s a jest!”

She pouted, looking down. “Well...I have to admit, his stories paint the outside world so vividly that even if they are greatly embellished, I find myself wishing I could see it for myself.” She looked up. “But it doesn’t change the fact that I’ve thought long and hard about it.”

Susuru nodded with a grin. She was getting excited. How lovely it would be to show her Thanalan, her home, just as she had shown her around the Twelveswood when she first arrived? That said, a part of her was, however, disappointed that her teasing largely went over her friend’s head. She had chanced to see them both talking to each other and though she had wanted to join them, the look in Nhaja’to’s eyes as he listened and spoke with Yehsui dissuaded her. He was smitten with her. She was sure of it. But Yehsui, being Yehsui, was completely oblivious. She felt a little sorry for him. “Are you going to tell Nhaja’to?” She asked.

Yehsui tilted her head to one side, as if deep in thought. “I probably should, shouldn’t I?” She said, after a while.

Her heart went out to the poor bard.

[chichiriwinds]

Prompt #25: Trust

For FFxivWrite2019

[Previous] [Next]

Despite being a bard of a popular travelling ensemble, Yehsui had been seeing Nhaja'to in the Twelveswood more often than her friend Susuru. On inquiry, she found out that he had asked for and had been granted permission from the Elementals to stay. She found it strange—mayhaps not as strange as he is also Forestborn—but she did not question it. Most residents, both within and without Gridania, seemed to enjoy the spontaneous performances he gave. She was no exception. Whenever she chanced to see or hear the bard performing, she would always stop and listen, if only for a fleeting moment. When duties permitted, she would even stay until the end and talk to him afterwards.

What started as a simple congratulations quickly turned into a lengthy chat. Bells would fly by as they chatted, him talking about his travels and she about her work around the Twelveswood in return. Why he wanted to hear about something decidedly less interesting is beyond her, but if she got to hear more about the world outside the Shroud, she was more than happy to oblige.

* * *

“You're making that face again, Yehsui.” Susuru remarked one day as the pair was enjoying tea.

“Huh? Oh.” Yehsui looked down, pensive.

“Is everything quite well? You haven't been yourself lately.” Susuru asked, concerned. Her friend had a faraway look that she had never seen before. It was almost as if she was yearning for something, waiting for something.

Yehsui nodded. “I've…just had a lot on my mind…” She turned to her friend. “Would you…promise not to tell a soul what I'm about to tell you?”

“But of course.” Susuru smiled gently, glad that her friend trusted her enough to confide in her.

Yehsui smiled, grateful. She looked down. “I'm…thinking of leaving the Shroud.”

[chichiriwinds]

Prompt #19: Radiant

For FFxivWrite2019

[Next]

“A concert. You want me to go to a concert.” Yehsui Tayuun looked at her friend in disbelief.

Her friend, Susuru Suru, a travelling merchant from Ul’dah, nodded enthusiastically. “Come on, Yehsui!” She encouraged, “How often do you hear the Elementals grant a group of performers permission to hold a public concert in Gridania, let alone one as famous as they?!”

Yehsui found herself at a loss for words. Her friend made a very good point.

“Oh come with me please?” She pleaded, seeing her friend still hesitant. “I'll bring you some of those Ul'dahn sweets you like so much the next time I'm back!”

“Alright, alright. I'll come.” Yehsui sighed in defeat, unable to refuse her friend. She must be a huge fan if she would go as far as to promise her sweets.

Susuru cheered. “You won't regret it, I promise!”

* * *

Yehsui was beginning to regret agreeing to her friend’s request. She had never seen Apkallu Falls so crowded. Menphina preserve, this is worse than the markets… Her eyes darted around the sea of people, hoping to spot her friend. A difficult task, given her friend’s small stature. She sighed. She was going to have to go through the sea of people to find her, wasn’t she?

A low, melodic voice sounded, capturing her attention. "Are you all right, my lady?"

She spun around, coming face-to-face with an unassuming Miqo'te in a cowl. One whom she would have missed were her ears not already tuned to his voice. He smiled gently.

For reasons she did not understand, she felt a little calmer. "Yes, I am…" She answered, finally finding her voice. "I came with my friend, but I seem to have lost sight of her. I'm not good with crowds, I'm afraid…" Why she felt compelled to tell him, a complete stranger, was beyond her. "What about you? Did you travel far?"

"You can say that." The Miqo'te rubbed the back of his head, slightly embarassed. "I uh…consider myself as something of a fan. I try my best to attend their concerts, wherever they may be."

Yehsui could not help but admire such dedication. "I am sure they appreciate your support--oh that's right!" She clapped her hands, "You should meet my friend! She's also a fan!"

In her excitement, she missed the panic that passed through his clear blue eyes.

"Yehsui! Thank the Twelve! I've been looking all over for you!" Relief was clear in the Lalafell's voice.

"Susuru! There's someone I want you to meet! He's also a fan--eh?" Yehsui looked around. The traveller was nowhere to be found.

* * *

Yehsui had heard that music could move the heart and soul, but it was not until that night that she felt it for herself. It was clear even to her that each performer poured their heart and soul into their song, their emotions laid bare. How brightly their souls shone. How radiant, dazzling they were. She could not help but be a little jealous of them.

"…by the Twelve, YEHSUI!!!"

Yehsui jumped, letting out a 'mrrp!' sound. She was so lost in her thoughts that she did not hear her friend. "M-my apologies, Susuru."

Before Susuru could retort, the pair heard a chuckle. They turned in the direction of the sound. A hooded Miqo'te walked out towards them. "You're--" Yehsui started, before realising that she did not know his name, "from before…" She did not notice Susuru's shocked expression.

He nodded, smiling. "Did you enjoy the concert?" He asked.

"I did." Yehsui answered, nodding. "Yourself?"

"Thal's Beard, Yehsui, that's Nhaja'to Jinjahl!" Susuru exclaimed. At her friend's confused look, she elaborated, "Singer and Flutist." No reaction. "Twelve, you just watched him perform! Remember? The song about a secret love?"

Yehsui's eyes widened as realisation dawned upon her. "That was you?!" She buried her face in her hands, embarassed. "My apologies, that was rude of me. That was a spectacular performance. Your song was very touching and uh…you have…a very different singing voice…"

"So I've been told." The Miqo'te chuckled. He pulled back his hood, revealing his snow-white hair and sparkling, clear blue eyes. "Nhaja'to Jinjahl, a bard." He bowed politely to both of them. "Pleased to make your acquaintence."

"Su-Susuru Suru." She stammered, starstruck. "I-I'm a merchant…from Ul'dah."

"Yehsui Tayuun…A conjurer…of Stillglade Fane…" She could not meet his eyes.