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darklydeliciousdesires · 7 months

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London Will Burn - Chapter Sixteen.

Here it is, besties. The final chapter. Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to read and offer such warm words of encouragement along the way. They mean the world to me! :)

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen

Tag list - In the comments, please DM to be added/removed

Words - 3,910

Warnings - 18+ content throughout. Minors DNI.

“So, where has the ginger twat taken my granddaughter today, then?”

Rin closed her eyes, counting to ten in her head. “Woburn Safari Park. She told him how much she was missing all the animals back in Africa, so he said he’d take her to where she could see a few of the same.”

It was becoming tiresome, her mother’s unchanged attitude regarding the father of her child. “Mum, you honestly have to stop being so hostile towards him. It shan’t be good, going forward, with him being in our lives to the extent that he will be. I’m not asking you to like him, but a little civility wouldn’t go amiss.”

Diane was resolute, crispy turning the next page in the copy of Hello magazine before her on the island. “I will never be anything close to civil with that piece of shit.”

This did not bode well. Not since she and Sean were... well, Rin wasn’t entirely sure what they were, exactly. Dating? Co-parenting with extras until he earned her trust? They’d been out a couple of times by that point, two dates the week before, one that had ended up in a sleepover at his place. Not that they’d slept much. God, he’d given her such a thorough shagging, she was still glowing from it four days on.

Yes. It was dating, she had to admit that it was. Furthermore, she was enjoying every second of it, when her guard slipped enough for her to do so.

“It’s a pity that you can’t put your own feelings aside for Tiger’s sake,” she spoke, continuing to do her stretches. She and Sokoro were off for a run, Rin glad to have a Saturday morning to herself to do it at a reasonable hour for once, enjoying a blissful lie in until 8am that morning as opposed to being out of the house by 6am.

Her mother viewed her through shrewd eyes, cocking her head slightly. “Is it purely for Tiger’s sake, Catherine?” The slight colouring of her daughter’s cheeks sealed it, though Rin did not utter a single word. “Oh, for heaven’s sake! You’re not, are you? With him?”

She was not in the mood for verbal combat that morning, but it looked like she was about to foray into it all the same. “I am, yes. I’m seeing how it goes with him. He’s genuinely sorry, mum, and I do see that. I need to get to a place of trust with him, though, and he told me he intends to prove himself there.”

“But what he did to you!”

“Is seven years in the past,” she interjected with, lifting her leg to the stool before her to tighten her shoelaces. “He would have absolutely nothing to gain from trying to be nefarious all over again. He has what he wants. I elevated him, made him rich and powerful once more, and he knows only too well what would happen to him, should he attempt to upset the apple cart. I do believe he is earnest, but I want to see if for myself.”

Diane snorted, lifting her coffee cup to her lips. “I think you’re barmy.”

“Yeah?” Lifting her chin, she pulled the laces sharply, double knotting the bow. “And I think, mum, with all the respect in the world, it’s none of your bloody business. Look how far I’ve come under my own merit and judgement. I am not an eighteen-year-old any longer who fell in love with a man she shouldn’t have, a man who had the agenda of his father pressing upon him. Finn is gone; it’s just Sean now. Believe me, he isn’t his dad.”

“Wouldn’t have lost it all in the first place if he was.” Rin realised that she wasn’t going to get anywhere with her mother, so simply kissed her cheek and told her she’d be back later, heading out to find Sokoro in the courtyard, lightly jogging in place.

“Let us depart now, eh, boss? Let’s run past the palace, wave to the King and Queen on our way!” Ever since arriving in London, her dear friend had been hellbent on getting a glimpse of the royal family. He’d scared a poor woman half to death one time while in Waitrose, asking very loudly if she was the Princess of Wales. She had not been, merely bearing a very uncanny resemblance to Princess Catherine.

“So, I hear you and your mother having shouting's this morning before we leave, eh?”

Having shouting’s. How she loved his turns of phrase. “We were, yes. We indeed had words with one another.”

“Over the ging... over Sean, yes?”

She liked that, that at least Sokoro was trying hard not to be hostile towards the father of her child, no matter how protective he was of her and Tiger. “Yes, over Sean. She’s very hardheaded, my mother. What kills me is the fact I think even my dad would have softened by now, and you know how ferocious he could be.”

Sokoro raised his eyebrows, wiping his clammy forehead on the back of his arm. “Kevin was nothing if not a force to be reckoned with, eh?” Pausing as they turned the corner, beginning to run down The Mall approaching Buckingham Palace, he then continued. “But I do agree, eh, I think that he would see how much he has taken to the role of Tiger’s father and not condemn him as your mother does. He ah, he did say something to me, back when she was a baby.”

Immediately, she slowed, jogging in place. “What?”

Sokoro looked uncomfortable, like he wished he’d have thought on his last sentence prior to its delivery. “Ah, I should probably not say, eh. Even though he is gone, I do not want to betray your father’s confidentiality.”

“Bollocks,” she spoke strongly, her eyes widened a fraction. “I’m here, he’s not. Tell me.”

Sokoro shook his head, his own in place jogging coming to a halt. “Okay, okay. We break here. It has been five kilometres.” Moving to a bench at the side of The Mall, he took a seat, swigging from his bottle of water.

“Your father, after Tiger was born, he pull me aside and he tell me all about it, how she came to be, how Sean betrayed you, etcetera. He tell me he was not only heartbroken for you because he know you love the man who got you pregnant despite what you tell him to the contrary, but because he always like Sean.

“He tell me he see him as perfect suitor for you, before all the shit with the sex video, eh. He tell me that if he ever could see you with anyone, it was Sean Wallace, because you are both so similar. But he say most of all, he see you with him because Sean would never stop you from being who you are. We stood outside of the lodge and I remember, he say he wanted to tell him about the baby, because he thought it might change him for the better, make him a good man for you again, but he would not do that to you, not ever. But he say it, Catherine.”

His words hit her square in the chest, the opinion her father held in secret. He’d wanted them to be together, but for the sake of her heart in all its damage done by Sean, never told anyone that other than Sokoro. It left her feeling like something was opening up within her, letting the light in to where she had been shadowed and jaded for the last seven years.

Her father, as it happened, was not as hardened as she’d thought. He’d seen the true Sean too at some point. He’d known that the man he was, and the one he was moulded into by Finn were truly not the same person.

“Did he say anything else?” she pressed with, Sokoro shrugging lightly.

“He say he hate him for what he did to you, this is natural of course, eh. But he also say he know he put him between a rock and a hard place, and with the weight of Finn Wallace bearing down on him, he know, and I quote, “the kid cracked under the pressure, and made my Catherine the fall when I doubt he really wanted to.” I think your dad, he see the same you do in Sean. A man who did what he did so he did not sink under the greater weight.”

It was hard to take in, the enormity of what Sokoro was telling her. Part of her wanted to shred him to pieces verbally for keeping it from her for so long, but most of her saw clearly that he was simply being a man of his word. Her father had shared his thoughts in secret with him, and Sokoro was nothing if not a bona fide confidant.

In all of this, her father’s opinion was something she had desperately wished she could call upon, to know if she was doing the right thing. Now, she had it. It wasn’t first hand, but she knew now that should her dear dad have still been with them, he’d have likely welcomed her and Sean finding a way back to one another.

“Are you okay?”

Sokoro’s question roused her from the daze she’d fallen into, Rin shaking herself with a small smile as she turned to him. “I am, you know. I really am.”

“Come on, let us continue. I feel Queen Camilla at the windows waiting for my jolly smile and wave!” He nudged her with a soft elbow as she got up, laughing and sipping her water before on they continued towards the palace. Their jog landed them back at Mulford Hall just before 10:30am, both immediately heading upstairs to take a shower each, Rin returning to hear the usual Kenyan merriment in the kitchen.

“What are you lot giggling about?” she asked, moving to the fridge to get out some fruit and yogurt, Sokoro, Marcus and Silas all sitting around the island, huge grins fixed in place.

“We are discussing the slang of your motherland, boss,” Marcus spoke, still partially hissing with laughter. “We see on Twitter somebody call Donald Trump a fuck billed twattypus and we all say, it could have been you! It sounds like something you say!”

“We learn so many British cusses from you. Knob, shit bag, twat, bloody fucking bastard,” Silas then weighed in with, counting them off on his fingers as he chuckled with glee.

“Or when she call you twat waffles and you thought it is some kind of British breakfast cereal,” Sokoro chimed, Marcus waving his hands in dismissal as the men roared.

“It sounds like it, though! I had no idea that twat was slang for the female anatomy until we met Catherine!” he laughed, Rin in absolute stitches as she closed the fridge door. They kept her entertained as she went about preparing her breakfast, Sokoro sorting himself and the other guys with gigantic vegetable omelettes and toast.

With a day to herself, she decided to relax before her masseuse arrived, Jenna giving her a much-needed rub down and easing of tension from her locked up back, several knots clicking and cracking under her expert hands. It was a day of pure bliss, her child not arriving back until 7pm, Sean stating that he was also taking her to the museum and out for dinner as well, carrying a very sleepy Tiger into the house. He looked completely shattered himself.

“I’ll take her,” Diane bustled coldly, fixing him with a glare. No, Rin’s words hadn’t sunk in any further. Luckily, Sean didn’t react with any negativity whatsoever.

“Thank you, Diane. It’s nice to see you again, you’re looking very well.”

She turned away from him, her lips slightly pursed. “I wish I could say the same.”

He winced. “Ouch.”

Rin reached for his face, giving him a kiss. “Maybe one day she might finally thaw.” While he expected as much from her mother, he did note that Rin seemed to be behaving more freely with him, making the first move to offer affection. “So, did you and our baby have a good day?”

Right on cue, he yawned. “A tiring one. I’ve been up since 5am, she decided she couldn’t sleep so we took Butch for a walk for an hour, one I ended up carrying her on my back for half of before dropping him off with Minnie for the day.” Hugging her, he rested his chin on her head, Rin laughing softly at the fake snoring noises he began making. “She has abundant energy, though. I don’t know how you cope full time.”

Emerging from beneath his chin, she smoothed her hands down his chest. “I’m used to it, as you’ll become, too. Can I get you a coffee before you fall asleep on me?”

He nodded, kissing her forehead. “Please.”

“Alright, go and rest your weary bones.” He moved to the sitting room and she the kitchen, taking a seat on the sofa and beginning to browse his phone. It might have been a Saturday night, he might have been shattered, but he had a few work-related emails he needed to at least check in with, planning on putting in some time the following morning in his office at home to be nicely ahead for the coming working week.

“Oh, you’re here.” Looking up, he met the narrowed eyes of Diane, the matriarch of the Cavanaugh household taking a seat on the adjacent sofa, eyeing him with her usual level of distain.

“Hello again, Diane,” he smiled, attempting to at least be cordial with the woman. The truth was, he had little to no issue with her, but goodness, she certainly gripped tightly upon the grudge she held towards him. “How are you?”

“I’d be much better if you weren’t here.”

He expected little less than such hostility, but knew he couldn’t meet it like for like. “I understand that, I do. I will be here, though, in your lives. Your daughter and granddaughter are very important to me.”

She picked up a copy of Tatler magazine from the coffee table, huffing as the pages were flicked through with mild irritation. “Until the next chance to use her in your quest for power presents itself. Men like you don’t change, Sean.”

He felt his temper flicker into life, the corner of his mouth twitching. He wouldn’t let her spark it into roaring flame, though. She was probably trying deliberately to wheedle such a response from him, purely so she could point her finger. “As I explained to Catherine, I am in no position to do that. Your daughter has elevated me to my former status, more so, in fact. I have my company, I have my standing, and I have a hell of a lucrative income because of her. I don’t truly have what I want the most, though. Trust me, fucking her over would not be conducive to me attaining it.”

“Oh, wouldn’t it?” she spoke, each word biting in its chilly delivery.

“No,” he spoke with a shrug, his smile widening, “because what I want most is her. I love your daughter, perhaps the most honestly and genuinely I have ever loved anyone. Trust me, my intentions towards her are not what you assume them to be. Far from it.”

He didn’t know, but out in the corridor, Rin stood, coffee in hand, grinning like an idiot to hear him coolly standing up to her mother. She might have known it already, but hearing him state that what he wanted most was her almost provoked a squeak of pure joy.

“Well, I shan’t be doing that any time soon, Sean,” she bustled, just as Rin walked in.

“That’s up to you, I suppose,” he replied, taking the coffee from Rin. “Thank you, darling. I think I might need three more just to stay awake. So, are you still coming with me when I go back up to Manchester on Thursday? We could take Tiger too, make a weekend of it once I am done with Friday’s meetings. We could take her to the art gallery, with her flair for the artistic I’m sure she’d enjoy it.”

She beamed widely. “Yes, great idea, I’d love to. It’ll mean getting her out of her pit early, I suppose. I was surprised you told me she’s been up since five this morning, that child loves her kip.”

“Isn’t this all so very cosy,” Diane muttered sarcastically, shaking her head. “Forgetting conveniently what that vile shit of a man did to you.”

Rin’s hand clenched into a fist where she rested it upon Sean’s thigh, her eyebrows knitting as she sighed. “Which is a mistake he both admits and apologises for, mum. I’ve let it go. You need to as well.”

“I can’t! Not when...” she began, the Tatler magazine cast aside. She didn’t get very far in her retort, though.

“Enough, mum,” her daughter spoke, with quiet firmness as she stared at her. “That’s seriously enough, now. I’m sick of dealing with your attitude. What happens between Sean and I is honestly none of your business, and I am fucking tired of you making it just that. This is my life, you need to but out and stop treating me like a child. That’s the end of it. Sean, come on. Let's move locations.”

He stood gladly, taking his coffee and following her out without further word, Diane sitting there floundering at being shot down so efficiently by her eldest child. “We both stood our ground with her, and didn’t raise our voices once,” he observed, moving up the grand staircase beside her, pausing to gulp back a little more coffee, save it spilling and Diane becoming furtherly vexed towards him.

Rin raised her eyebrows. “We must be growing up, at last.” Arriving in her bedroom, she swung the door open, walking through to where she’d had a little bit of a makeover of the large room, the former section dedicated to her desk and workout items over at the far side by her window now containing a small sofa and television set on the mantle above the fireplace. The space most definitely had more of a grown up feel to it than it had when Sean had been in there last.

Sitting down beside her, he finished his coffee while they chatted on how best to handle her mother, both agreeing to be staunch without rising to her need to argue the toss constantly. The coffee was sadly no match for his tiredness, though, Sean waking with a start hours later to darkness, finding himself draped in a comfortable throw. The bed his sleeping love occupied looked much more comfortable.

“I was wondering if I’d have a companion at some point,” she murmured, turning to cuddle up to his nakedness after he’d undressed and gotten under the covers. “What time is it?”

“Half past two. I’d say time to go back to sleep, but I’m wide awake.”

She grinned into the darkness as his hands felt their way to her, pulling her even closer, lifting her leg to rest over his hip. “Mmm,” she hummed, feeling the hard of his cock press against her abdomen. “Yes, you definitely are, aren’t you?” Her hand reached between them, curling around his cock, working him lazily as she felt the sleepiness slipping away, ducking her head to begin placing hot, open-mouthed kisses upon his neck.

He lay there in a daze of sexual fog clouding him for a few moments, enjoying the feeling of what her hand evoked within before his own reached for her, stroking her softly, feeling her begin to dampen his fingers. Pushing them inside her, his mouth then founds hers, her teeth crushing a soft bite upon his lower lip. Those kisses, all sugared embers and need, began to gain rapid heat, hands working upon one another with more vigour until Sean turned her, slotting himself between her legs and arrowing into her fully with one fluid motion.

She swallowed back his moans as their tongues swirled, her groin prickling pleasantly, nerve endings singing their bliss against the thick swell of his cock as he dragged her walls deftly. It was heavenly, wet velvet softly flexing around hot steel, their veins warming, Rin crying out softly at feeling him burying himself within her again and again.

With his mouth at her neck, consuming her with such all-encompassing force, all that existed was him, that moment, the sound of his groans in her ear as his tongue glided across the column of her throat. Him, just him. He was all she wanted, and to hell with what her mother thought of that.

Trembling against the lean bulk of his chest, the lightning bounced beneath her skin, the weight of him centring, driving himself into her plush wetness, causing moans she barely recognised to be hers. How she had longed for a lover with this kind of skill while they’d been parted, but beneath him there in her bed, she realised she could look forever but never find in a single other person what she had with Sean.

His hips arrowed down purposefully, giving way to a slight rotation that had her floating in the stars, her fingers raking through his hair as she arched up against him, teeth nipping his thick shoulder as her nails grazed his back, digging in and clawing when he began to gain momentum.

She was molten beneath him, singed by the wildfire of his fuck, her walls beginning to flutter around him as his soaking cock pounded her hard, mouth lowering to suck at her nipples, making her come apart beneath him with surging force, Sean coming just moments after her.

They fell asleep that night entangled, swathed in the blanket of one another, Rin awaking early the following morning. The sunlight streamed in, the sound of the Westminster bells softly tolling, yawning as she stretched. Looking up, she was greeted by the sight of smiling blue eyes, shifting up a little to place a soft kiss upon his lips.

There they were again, just as they had been seven years before. Sunday morning, bell song and sunshine.

“I love you.”

He smiled, kissing the tip of her nose. “Finally.”

Finally, indeed.

Finally, they had everything they’d been looking for. Finally, they had love and peace, and finally, although it took her almost two years after that morning to see that Sean was entirely genuine, they had Diane’s support. After all, the mother of the bride couldn’t very well have a sour face on at the wedding of her eldest daughter. Not after she’d bared witness to seeing just how happy the man waiting for her at the altar had truly made her.

In fact, Diane’s tears of joy as they were pronounced husband and wife were the greatest of all the guests, watching Rin held tightly by her new husband, and the complete and utter adoration they viewed one another with. Neither noticed it, though, lost in one another as they kissed, Sean stroking her face with his thumbs as he rested his forehead to hers, repeating the word he had spoken two years prior, when they had truly reconnected.

“Finally.”

The End.

#sean wallace fanfiction #sean wallace smut #gangs of london fanfiction #gangs of london #sean wallace x ofc #sean wallace fanfic #sean wallace fic #joe cole #gangs of london fanfic #gangs of london fic #london will burn #sean and rin

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whiteqnn · 4 years

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PURE [3] - Corpse Husband x Fem! Reader

A/N: Over 1 thousand notes. You guys are insane. I can’t see any other explanation.

Thank you so much for all the love and support under the previous parts, all those comments just absolutely made my day! I would never expect this story to receive such a positive feedback, which I’m extremely grateful for!

Anyway, I decided to add some additional plot to this story - mainly, the sudden criticism and hate directed on Y/N after the last Among Us stream. I thought it would make things more interesting.

That being said, I hope you enjoy the third part ^^

part 1

part 2

part 4

part 5

PURE [3]

Y/N stared at her phone screen, reading through the latest tweets of her friends inviting their fans to watch their streams. It was Thursday evening and just as it was planned, everyone was getting ready for another game of Among Us. Just as she would do if it wasn’t for all those comments...

The last stream caused sudden, unexpected amounts of attention on her social media. She probably shouldn’t be that surprised by it, given the fact that by appearing in Sean’s and Felix’s videos she wasn’t all that strange to their fans. But people who watched Rae, Toast, or Corpse’s streams didn’t know her. And apparently, some of them weren’t that happy to see a new face among the group of well-known gamers.

She always tried to avoid the unnecessary spotlight as much as she could, preferring to stay hidden somewhere behind other, much more popular streamers. And it never bothered her. She was never one to enjoy too much attention anyway.

That’s why when she discovered how upset, or even angry, some people were when she played with all those famous streamers, she was quite shocked, to say the least.

Like all those comments under Poki’s tweet, in which she mentioned who’s gonna be playing this time...

“Duh, why’s that Y/N chick supposed to play with them again? There are at least hundreds of other, much more popular streamers I can think of who would be better than her.”

“Who the fuck is she anyway? Why’s she there?”

“lmao, some random girl who got lucky enough to know jacksepticeye. Don’t get why she’s playing with them though.”

“NOT HER AGAIN. I SWEAR TO GOD SHE WAS SO FUCKING ANNOYING LAST TIME”

Sure, she wasn’t as famous as Felix, or Sean, or Rae, or anyone else for that matter. Her audience wasn’t very small, but it was nothing compared to the number of fans other YouTubers had. It was understandable that most people didn’t know who she was, and didn’t understand why she was there in the first place.

She was, in fact, just some random girl who was lucky to have Sean as her friend. But in a group of such great and well-known streamers, she definitely stood out like a sore thumb.

Y/N almost jumped in her seat when her phone beeped with a new message, Sean’s nickname showing up at the top of her screen.

Jackaboy: We’re starting in a few kiddo

Jackaboy: But join the call now so we can both make fun of Felix

After the last game, she was so excited and couldn’t wait for this evening. She looked forward to cooperating with Sykkuno again, to arguing with Toast, to laughing with Sean and Felix, to murdering other people with Corpse... Yet now, all this excitement seemed to vanish just like the mood to play, let alone talk with other people. They would surely see right through her and try to make her spill the beans, which would ruin the stream. And the last thing she wanted was to ruin their game.

Jackaboy: You there Y/N??

She sighed, thinking of some believable excuse that wouldn’t arouse suspicion, but her mind was flooded with all those comments and DMs she received over those past days, which expressed nothing but hatred towards her.

Y/N: I’m really sorry Sean, but I don’t think I will be joining you today... I don’t feel very well.

She waited for Sean’s reply impatiently, expecting him to send her some angry emoji or tell her to move her ass and join the discord call. What she didn’t expect though, was that he would facetime her.

Her first instinct was to throw her phone across the room as if it would make Sean stop calling. He wouldn’t stop unless she’d tell him the truth.

So she cleared her throat and plastered the widest smile on her face, before answering his call.

“Alright, what is going on?” Sean asked right away, staring at her with his brows furrowed. He wasn’t in his recording room, but in his kitchen, which meant that he left his stream to call her. “And please don’t tell me you’re sick cause I won’t believe it anyway. And neither will Pewds.”

“I’m tired, Sean... I was working late again and I really need to rest.” she lied, trying to keep her voice steady and calm. She really didn’t want Sean to interrogate her now, not when his fans were waiting for him. “I’m sure you’ll find someone else though. Please tell the guys that I’m sorry”

“Y/N, c’mon, cut this bullshit. What’s wrong?” he asked softly, moving his phone closer to his face. “You know you’re a terrible liar, just tell me what happened. If you don’t wanna play then neither do I.”

“Sean, please don’t do it” she shook her head with a sigh. “Your fans are waiting for you, I’ll be fine.”

“Well they’re waiting for you too you dummy, I already promised them you’ll be playing with us tonight” he stated matter of factly, rolling his eyes. Y/N remained silent for a moment, and Sean suddenly furrowed his brows, narrowing his eyes at her in a suspicious look. “Did someone tell you something rude last time we played? Who and what?”

“What? No, Sean, oh my God. Everyone was super nice, it has nothing to do with the last stream... not with you guys, at least.” she mumbled under her breath, dropping her eyes from Sean’s confused face.

“What do you mean not with you guys? Y/N, what the hell happened?” he demanded, slowly getting more and more worried. She wouldn’t tell him though, too scared that Sean would just laugh it off, even though he also sometimes had problems with dealing with hate. And just as if he was reading her mind, Sean sighed, his face softening in a sad smile. “You’ve read the comments, didn’t you?”

She felt so stupid for being so easily offended by comments of some random people on the Internet, that she just nodded her head meekly, still looking anywhere but at the man.

“Look kiddo... I’m not gonna tell you to get yourself together and just ignore them, cause it won’t help, and I know cause I’ve been there. Hell, I’m still there.” he chuckled to himself and continued “Anyway, you really shouldn’t be worrying yourself about people who don’t even know you. They don’t know you, Y/N, why would some complete stranger’s opinion matter to you?”

“They said I shouldn’t be playing with you guys... that I’m nothing but a burden and you should be playing with someone who’s at least recognizable.”

“Well excuse me Miss, last time I checked I could choose who the fuck I want to play with.” Sean scoffed, clearly irritated by such comments “You’re one of my best friends Y/N and I don’t give a fuck what some haters say. And neither should you.”

“Maybe you should just invite someone else... It would make everyone happy.” she muttered almost inaudibly, but Sean almost barked at her when he heard her words.

“I told you to cut that bullshit, Y/N! Everyone couldn’t wait for this game and now you wanna back out? C’mon, kid. Do you have any idea how heartbroken Sykkuno’s gonna be? When you left so quickly last time, he kept complaining that he has no one to team up with.” she couldn’t help but smile at that, letting out a tiny giggle. “And Corpse? Have you even seen his last tweet?”

“What? No, I- I don’t follow him...” she said, wondering what Sean was talking about. She quickly searched for Corpse on Twitter, still being on facetime with Sean, and her heart almost dropped when she saw the last tweet.

@.Corpse_Husband Really excited for tonight’s Among Us stream, 8PM PST.

Jacksepticeye

Valkyrae

Pewdiepie

Pokimane

Sykkuno

Disguised Toast

Logic

Mr Beast

and, hopefully, my partner in crime - Little Y/N

She stared at the screen with her eyes widened, and her lips corners curling up in a small, bashful smile. It was so nice of Corpse to mention her as well, especially with the nickname that he seemed to like so much since their last game.

“God, if you could see yourself right now. How’s it that my pep talk didn’t do shit, but Corpse’s tweet magically made you smile, ugh.” Sean reminded her of his presence, and she quickly returned to the call, trying to somehow control her burning cheeks.

“It’s not like that, Sean, I really appreciate that you’re trying to cheer me up... I just didn’t expect your friends to like me...” she admitted quietly, and if Sean could, he would probably strangle her at that moment.

“I JUST TOLD YOU THAT SYKKUNO KEPT BUGGING ME ABOUT YOU FOR TWO FUCKING HOURS. YOU THINK HE WOULD TALK ABOUT YOU IF HE DIDN’T LIKE YOU?!”

“I just... what if they’re just being nice, but they don’t actually want me to play with them?”

“I’m done.” Sean groaned, shaking his head furiously. “Alright, here’s what you’re gonna do. You stay away from your phone, join the discord call, say hi to everyone, and we’re all gonna have fun, okay? If not, Pewds is gonna murder you, cause he was already growing impatient even before I called you.”

“I’m still not sure if that’s a good idea, Sean...”

“But I am sure, Y/N! Now come on, we’re playing in five. I’m telling everyone you’re joining as well.”

And before she could even reply, he hung up. Y/N groaned, rushing to her computer to turn it on. Now it would just be plain rude not to join the game, especially after Sean wasted his time talking with her, while he should be talking to his fans. Just as he suggested, she kept her phone far away from her desk, deciding to stay away from Twitter and all those comments for a bit. Maybe it would help her clear her mind and at least try to have some fun.

An invite to the group call was already waiting for her, along with a message from Sean with a code to the game. Y/N put her headphones on before joining the call and quickly typing in the code.

“... so let me repeat myself. I ALWAYS sound guilty, no matter what. Please, guys, don’t vote me out!”

Y/N shook her head with a smile on her lips when the first thing she heard after joining the call was Felix’s pleading voice. Clearly, he was already trying to save his own ass even before the game began.

Y/N could hear Sean’s loud voice as he commented on Felix’s plea with some snarky remark, later also catching the sounds of Rae’s laughter. Everyone was already there, they’ve been clearly waiting for her to join.

“Hey, look who’s finally here! Hi Y/N!” Poki noticed her presence first.

“Hello everyone” Y/N said, as shy and quiet as usual.

“Oh, Y/N! It’s so great to see you again, I was worried you weren’t joining us tonight” Sykkuno said, a pout clear in his voice.

“WELL ABOUT DAMN TIME” Felix all but yelled, making her roll her eyes with a smile. “What did I tell you about being late?!”

“Give her a break Felix, her mic wasn’t working again... Luckily, I was there to save the damsel in distress” Sean said, and even though she couldn’t see him, Y/N was almost certain that he was smirking.

“Yeah, I’m really sorry guys to have kept you waiting so long...” Y/N said, feeling genuinely bad. Maybe Sean was right after all? They could have just invited someone else, and yet they decided to wait for her.

“It’s okay, you’re here now and it’s all that matters” a deep voice sounded out, and whether she liked it or not, Y/N grinned like an idiot with a blush rising up her cheeks.

“Shit, here we go again...” Felix sighed, making everyone else laugh. Y/N bit at her lower lip, feeling her heart thump in her chest as she felt a sudden wave of courage, deciding to speak up despite her initial shyness:

“Well... I couldn’t just leave my partner in crime alone, right?” she asked, and she could swear she heard Corpse stutter as if he completely didn’t expect her to say that.

“Ah yes, after all, killing wouldn’t be the same without her, right Corpse?” Toast teased, repeating Corpse’s words from the last stream. Everyone in the call laughed, Y/N included. She couldn’t stop herself from smiling, even though just mere minutes ago she was on the verge of crying. “It’s good to have you here, Y/N/N. Maybe I’ll actually get a chance to finally kill you this time.”

“Jesus Christ, Toast. You sound like a psychopath. Hey, I’m happy you’re here, lemme stab you in the back, please?” someone whose nickname was MrBeast spoke up with a chuckle, before directing his next words to Y/N “I believe we haven’t played together before, I’m Mr Beast, it’s really nice to meet you Y/N”

“Yeah, pleased to meet you!” another player, Logic, spoke up “I also didn’t have a chance to play with you yet, but I’ve seen Sean’s last stream... Let me just say, that Toast murder was absolutely perfect!”

“Wow. And here I almost managed to block it out. I’m fucking traumatized Y/N, you should be ashamed of yourself” Toast scoffed over Felix’s laughter.

“You should be proud of yourself!” Sean interfered “Just so you know lads, Y/N may seem like a little angel, but she’s a little demon. You’ve been warned.”

“Yeah, she’ll charm you with her voice only to snap your neck next second.” Felix scoffed.

“Just like she did with Corpse!”

“Charm?!” Y/N gasped, her cheeks burning.

“I don’t recall Y/N killing me...” Corpse said in his low voice.

“I love how that’s the only thing he denied” Poki pointed out in a teasing voice, which only made Y/N sink further into her chair.

“Can we please start the game now?” she asked in a pleading voice, hoping that everyone would stop making fun of Corpse and her. She could only imagine how uncomfortable he felt, for some reason being the target of their jokes... They must’ve made him feel awkward, right?

“Jack, did you tell Y/N how we’re playing tonight?” Sykkuno asked, and she sighed in relief that they dropped the jokes.

“Oh, right! So there’s this mod called proximity chat, where we’re able to hear each other as we pass by another person, and it seems quite fun so that’s what we decided to try out tonight.” Sean explained to Y/N, and before she could ask another question, he added “I’ve just sent you the link, it’ll take a minute to install it.”

“Oh, okay. Thank you Sean” Y/N said, before downloading the mod and quickly installing it. When everything was set and ready, she pulled up Among Us again and typed in the code, and the game finally began.

“Woah”

“Holy shit!”

“Guys this is so cool!” Sykkuno exclaimed, his voice so happy and excited that Y/N couldn’t help but giggle.

“Okay, I’m scared now. I feel like encounters with Imposter are just gonna be perfectly cut screams” Felix chuckled, as they left the dropship and moved down the map. That’s when Y/N gasped in surprise, upon seeing the locations completely different than those she was used to.

“Wait- is that a different map?” she asked through her mic, hearing Toast’s distanced, devilish laugh. There was only Rae and Sykkuno beside her, as everyone else have already split up to do their tasks.

“Oh yeah, that’s Polus, it’s much more fun than the one we were playing in last time.” Rae explained happily and Y/N groaned. She didn’t know that map.

“Great. I don’t even know how am I supposed to do tasks in here...”

“Oh, it’s not that hard. They’re in most cases similar to those you already know, they only look a little bit different.” Sykkuno said in his kind voice, before asking “Do you want to team up again, Y/N?”

“I thought you would never ask Sykkuno” Rae chuckled under her breath.

“Yeah, that would be great! I need someone to show me around” she smiled. The trio finally moved from their spot beside the dropship and went to the left where, as Y/N later realized, was electrical. She quickly did her task in there, being under the watchful eyes of both Sykkuno and Rae.

Before the latter could do his own task, the first body was reported.

“The body is in the lab” Felix said, and Y/N couldn’t help but smirk as she saw that it was Toast who was murdered first. One less person to accuse her or try to frame her, if he was the Imposter.

“I just ran towards the lab from the left side, I only saw Poki on my way there” Corpse said right away, and the accused girl was quick to try and defend herself:

“Okay, I wasn’t in the lab, I was doing that engines task which is next to the lab.”

“Did you see someone else there?” Jack questioned.

“Nope, just me and the engines.”

“Okay. Sykkuno, where are you?” the lime astronaut was next on Jack’s list of suspects, which made Sykkuno groan.

“Why do you sound so suspicious right away?” he asked in disbelief, causing the rest to giggle “I was with Y/N and Rae all this time, we were all doing our tasks in electrical.”

“Is that true Y/N?”

“Yes Sean, that is true” she rolled her eyes with a laugh “I don’t even know this map, I have to stick with someone so I don’t end up like Toast.”

“Alright, what about rest? Logic? I think I saw you in admin but then you disappeared somewhere.” Felix said.

“Yeah I’m with Mr Beast in the office”

“That’s right” Mr Beast confirmed, which didn’t bring anything new to the investigation, so everyone decided to skip.

��Wo- Okay where are we now?” Y/N asked in surprise, when the new round began in some completely new place Sykkuno didn’t manage to show her yet. She could hear as Corpse laughed at her shocked voice, which made her smile widely.

“Yeah, I’m also not used to this new map yet” he admitted, his black astronaut walking up to her white one “Hey, wanna see something cool?”

“Sure!”

*Meanwhile Sykkuno*

“Okay this is bad guys, we lost Y/N” Sykkuno said to his mic, running around the map to find the girl he was earlier teamed up with. “I thought she followed us when the new round began, but she must’ve gone the other way... What if she’s dead already? Not good, not good...”

"Woah! This looks amazing! Is there some task here as well?”

“Yes, there’s temperature recording right here” Corpse said, standing by the lava pit, watching as Y/N’s character ran back and forth over the pool of lava.

“I wonder if you could jump into it. What do you think, Corpse?” she asked curiously, standing close to the edge.

“Not that I’m aware of it...” he mumbled coming closer to the edge as well “Why would you jump into it?” he asked with a half-smile on his face.

“So Felix can’t stab me in the back.” she whispered, even though there was no one around them.

“You think it’s him?” Corpse mirrored her voice, and she hummed in response “Why?”

“He’s constantly suspicious of everyone, last time we played he also kept interrogating us all, without even telling his own location.” she stated as if it was very obvious. Corpse couldn’t help but let out a laugh “What? Why are you laughing at me?”

“Not at you, Y/N. I’m just impressed by your investigation skills” he admitted “In that case, we better both jump in. Felix likes to frame other people.”

“You wanna jump into the lava with me?”

“Sure I do.”

“There you are!” Sykkuno’s lime astronaut came out of nowhere, followed by Mr Beast. Two of them walked up to Y/N and Corpse, and before the latter could even say anything, Mr Beast snapped Y/N’s neck.

“WAIT, NO-”

“OH GOD, OH GOD” Sykkuno yelled in panic.

“KILL HIM CORPSE” Mr Beast screamed, frantically running around.

“What the heck?” Y/N stared at her screen in shock, her dead body laying over the lava pit. Mr Beast had already fled to the left, leaving her, Sykkuno and Corpse standing between two of them. None of them said anything for a moment before the black astronaut finally spoke up.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry, Y/N” he kept repeating, regret clear in his voice. “And Sykkuno, I- I can’t even express how-”

He was cut off by Felix’s scream, who reported the bodies before Corpse could kill him as well.

“IT’S CORPSE ALRIGHT” Felix yelled right away “HE’S STANDING OVER Y/N AND SYKKUNO, HE HAS THEIR BLOOD ON HIS HANDS”

“That is- I did not kill them” Corpse replied, calm as ever, as opposed to his frantic apologies.

“Then why were you standing there?! Without reporting the bodies?!”

“I was... mourning their death.” he replied, which caused the whole group to burst out laughing. “Seriously guys, you think I would murder Sykkuno? And Y/N? I would never even think of hurting them.”

“The simp is strong, we get it, but it doesn’t really save your situation” Rae laughed.

“Let’s kick him out guys, he can’t even defend himself” Sean chuckled, and everyone else didn’t need to be told twice. Soon enough, Y/N watched as Corpse’s black astronaut was thrown into the lava pit... Oh, the irony...

The game continued with her wandering around the map, doing the rest of her tasks to at least support somehow her fellow crewmates. She stumbled upon Corpse’s ghost at some point and laughed wholeheartedly when he started circling her little character in something she read as an attempt to apologize.

A little while later another body was reported, this time it was Felix who lost his life. Y/N didn’t really focus on the conversation this time, glancing at her phone instead. There was this urge to reach for it and check how people reacted to her joining the game, but she kept repeating Sean’s words in her head. There was no point in worrying about the opinion of somebody who doesn’t even know her... or at least that’s what she tried to convince herself to think.

Her attention was brought back to the game when she heard the sound of a new message from someone who was also dead. She clicked on the chat, seeing that it was one of the Impostors.

Corpse: :(

Corpse: I’m sorry

Y/N thought it was sweet of him to apologize for it, even though it was his main goal to murder everyone after all. She believed he was genuinely sorry for it, just like she was each time she was an Impostor and had to kill somebody.

Sykkuno: Welcome to the afterlife, Corpse!

She laughed at Sykkuno’s constant happiness, which was evident even in his messages, before typing one as well:

Y/N: We’re all corpse here

Sykkuno: Oh, so it means we’re all really cool then ^^

Y/N: Fair point

Corpse: See Y/N

Corpse: I told you I would jump into the lava for you

Y/N: You didn’t exactly jump...

Corpse: :(

Y/N: But let’s say it counts as well :)

Corpse: :)

Before they knew, the voting ended. Mr Beast was thrown into the lava, which ultimately lead to the victory of crewmates. Y/N cheered happily, when the blue sign appeared on her screen, right above everyone else who was innocent.

“Yaaay, the first time I wasn’t killed in the first game!” Sean announced enthusiastically, his astronaut running around the dropship.

“Yeah, and the first time it went so fast...”

“Right? Corpse, I’m disappointed in you. What happened to the King of Impostors?” Rae asked.

“Well.. no matter how good you are, you can’t always win, right?” Corpse replied calmly.

“Hmm, you seemed kinda absent-minded during the game, though...” Poki suggested with a smirk hiding in her voice, and Rae was very quick to pick on it.

“Oh, you’ve noticed that too? Almost as if he was distracted by something”

“I don’t know what are you talking about” he chuckled nervously, and Y/N just sat in her chair confused about what was going on. “Anyway, who’s up for another round?”

“Yeah, I have an idea” Sean said, effectively shutting everyone up “What if we play something along the lines of hide and seek? Let’s have one impostor, and everyone else needs to get their tasks done before he finds them.”

“That is...” Felix took in a dramatic breath “THE BEST THING I’VE EVER HEARD ABOUT”

“Yeah, I think it will be fun” Sykkuno replied.

“It sounds really cool, but let’s maybe tell who’s the impostor? I think it would be more fair” Rae suggested.

“I think it’s a good idea” Sean concluded, before changing the settings for one impostor only. Y/N waited patiently for the game to begin, and when she saw that she was a crewmate again, she sighed in relief. Only to gasp in a panic a second later...

“It’s me.”

Everyone stumbled out of the dropship as Corpse admitted that he’s the impostor. It seemed that knowing exactly who can murder everyone made the whole game a little bit terrifying...

“I don’t know where the heck I’m going” Y/N mumbled to herself with a nervous laugh when instead of doing her tasks, she searched for the perfect place to hide. When she entered security, she spotted Mr Beast fixing the wires, so she decided to join him.

“OH SHIT- god damn it, you scared me to death!” he all but yelled when she appeared next to him, doing her tasks.

“Sorry” she giggled, quickly finishing the wires, before speeding out of the room. On her way to weapons, she stumbled across Felix’s dead body, and could hear some screaming in the background... but didn’t recognize who was murdered next.

Y/N managed to do most of her tasks without meeting Corpse, whom she hoped not to see probably for the first time since they played together. She was just leaving decontamination when she heard Sean’s panicked laughter:

“...tee, bitches love me?”

“Wrong.” Corpse’s voice almost made her squeak in surprise, only to really scream when he suddenly snapped Sean’s neck.

“Retreat, retreat!” Y/N laughed as she sped past oblivious Rae and Logic, Corpse hot on her tail. She quickly returned to the decontamination room, hoping to flee from her inevitable death, when Corpse’s black astronaut walked in, and the door closed.

“Please don’t kill me” she chuckled, even though there was no hope for her.

“Finish my lyrics, and I’ll let you live...” he began, and Y/N furrowed her brows in confusion “ I spilt wine...”

“Wait- what lyrics? You sing?” she asked, completely dumbfounded. Corpse was silent for a moment as if he didn’t understand her, before bursting out laughing “What’s so funny again? Corpse, come on!”

“Yes, Y/N, I do sing, I was actually hoping you’ve heard some of my songs...” he admitted, still chuckling to himself. She felt a blush rising up her cheeks.

“Oh- I- I didn’t, I-... but I will, okay? I’ll do it right away!” she promised, quickly jumping up to grab her phone and listen to Corpse’s song. She was genuinely shocked, she would never expect him to sing!

She unlocked her phone with a wide, somehow nervous smile on her face, which, however, dropped the moment she saw her notifications. Hundreds of notifications.

“You there, Y/N?” Corpse’s voice reached her after a moment, when she still didn’t say anything, just kept looking at her screen. “I hope my music isn’t so bad that you passed out from listening to it...”

She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes, her phone gripped tightly in her shaking hands.

“Um, Y/N?” his voice became more worried now “Is everything okay?”

Y/N cleared her throat and quickly wiped her eyes, closing them for a moment to steady her breathing.

“Yeah, all good Corpse” she forced herself to smile, so her voice wouldn’t sound weird. “Look, um, I need to leave, can you tell the others bye from me?”

“Is something wrong?” Corpse asked confused.

“No, of course not!” she laughed through her tears “Something just came up and I really need to leave.”

“You sure you’re-”

“Bye Corpse. It was nice playing with you.”

A/N: I hope you guys are not too disappointed in me... It didn’t turn out as I initially thought it would. Isn’t it too dramatic? And is this hate plot fine? Or is it not? What do guys you think?

TAG LIST IS CLOSED!

@slytherin-chan @pillowjj @afuckingunicornn @love-and-virtues @ignooynim @crapimahuman @hannahjsworld @laugh-like-the-moon @fallengoddess772 @kingric03 @dolphinpink310 @paigeyisme @bunnychano3o @dxrtygxrl28 @z-nyx @baby-iyania @trashygeek

#corpse husband #corpse x reader #corpse husband x reader #fanfiction #youtubers #corpse husband imagine #writing #imagine

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lightsovermonaco · 3 years

Text

His Good Sweater: Chapter 5

Masterlist

Shoutout to @acollectionofficsandshit for being my sounding board and beta reader! She's the absolute best a girl could ask for, thanks my love!

Word Count: 3.0k

Recommended song: "The Heart is a Muscle" by Gang of Youths

You woke before the sun, Pierre's bare chest pressed to your back and an arm slung over your middle. You wiggle in his grasp, trying to be sneaky as you turn to face him but ultimately waking him. You run a finger over his lips as they curve upwards before biting lightly. You draw back and he laughs quietly.

"Morning," You whisper, head throbbing slightly. "I feel like I got hit by a train."

"Knocking back four or five shots in a few hours will do that to you." Pierre stretches, arching his back and exposing his neck. The slight mark you left the night before had darkened into a true, unmissable bruise. The reminder of it sent a thrill down your spine, and you couldn't resist ghosting your lips over the hurt.

He sighs, cupping your chin and bringing your mouth up to his. The kiss is lazy, both of you still too ensnared by sleep to put any heat into it.

You stayed tangled in him until Yuki called to remind Pierre they had to be at the airport by eight. You helped him pack as slowly as you could manage, a stone settling in your gut. When the time came, Pierre hadn’t wanted to leave, only relenting when Yuki called again to say the jet was waiting on him.

The longing wasn't something that normally hit you this hard when Pierre left. It was new, the edges raw and unhealed when you poked at it. Everything on campus Tuesday reminded you of him, from the sunlight hitting the lab table to the rare cloudless blue of the London sky.

Just when you’d gotten over the sting of his absence, the news broke. Charles sent you the link to the article, simply captioned, 'You will want to read this.'

Gasly snogs mystery girl in London bar, the headline read. And fuck, that was a grainy picture of you standing between his legs, fingers tangled in his hair. You scroll through the article, heart in your throat, praying you weren’t called out by name.

By some small miracle, whoever had taken the photos hadn’t gotten one of your face. Against your better judgement, you checked the comments.

That was where your name came up. Fans had connected the dots. Your hair had been up that night, but it was the exact same shade as the picture. Your instagram had been filled with photosets of London for months, and Pierre had flown out early before Silverstone. Clearly he had been meeting someone. Anyone with half a brain could figure out that you were the one in the photos, even if the article didn't mention you directly.

The first DM didn’t come for a few hours. It was nasty, the user hurling cruel words at you that struck your chest like tiny knives. Plenty more followed, threats and names alike.

Gold digger.

Does she really think she deserves him?

He could do so much better.

You couldn’t bear attending classes. You sent Pierre the link to the damning article and stayed in your apartment and sobbed. The fans- if they could even be called such a thing- pulled no punches. Every DM and comment struck home, until you eventually had to turn your phone off and curl up in bed, defeated.

People are cruel, you thought, wiping the tears that streak down your cheeks.

You kept your phone off for a few hours before you gathered the courage to check it again. You immediately uninstall any and all social media, unwilling to let it affect you further than it already had. But messages pour in, most from Pierre and a few from your brother.

Hell yeah! Was all your brother sent, along with a screenshot of the article. Your mouth twists, the memory of the comments washing over you again.

Pierre’s messages were the ones that broke you. There were close to a dozen of them, accompanied by missed calls and panicked voicemails.

“Are you okay? Please pick up the phone, my love, I need to hear that you’re okay. I love you. Please call me back.”

The last message, time stamped from a half hour earlier, simply said, “I’m getting on a plane.”

A fresh sob wracks your body. You press a hand to your mouth, trying to silence it. God, he was so pure hearted. You knew the comments would hurt him just as much as they hurt you, if not more. He would blame himself, when in reality, it had been a mutual mistake. Either one of you should have recognized the risks of your actions. But you couldn't let him risk his career for it. You could make it through… somehow.

I’m okay, you type, hating that you had to lie. You don’t need to come to London.

I’m already in the air, He informs you, and you curse softly. He would have hell to pay upon returning to Austria, even if he had somehow convinced Tost to let him leave at the last minute.

I'll be there soon

The flight from Vienna to Heathrow was about two and a half hours, which meant you had that long to pull yourself together. You didn’t want Pierre to see you broken. You shower and change into slightly less ragged sweatpants and an oversized shirt. You grab your laptop, quickly emailing your professors to apologize for missing lecture unannounced and informing them you wouldn’t be there the rest of the week either. You'd need time to sort out your head before facing your peers.

Pierre’s knock came far too quickly. You’d barely assembled your face into a mask of resolve before the door opened. Whatever semblance of control you'd managed to construct came crashing down at the sight of him. He looks just as distraught as you, eyes red and cheeks flushed.

Before he says a word, he gathers you in his arms, tucking your head to his chest. Your lip wobbles, and when he whispers “I’m so sorry,” the tears fall in earnest. For less than a week, you’d been on top of the world with Pierre by your side. You’d gotten to enjoy the idea of being his girlfriend for six days before reality stepped in and ruined it.

You clutch at his shirt, fighting hard to piece yourself back together. Now that he was there, the dam had burst and no amount of willpower could keep the sobs back.

Pierre sweeps you up, one arm under your knees and the other keeping you tight to him as he carries you to your bedroom. He climbs into bed, shoes and all, and keeps you in his lap as he strokes your hair. He sniffles, softly enough that you know he's trying to be strong for you. The realization that he's crying too just makes it hurt that much more.

"I'm sorry," He whispers again and again, as if the two syllables were the only ones he remembered. You can't find your voice to tell him you don't blame him or how much his presence means.

Instead, you press your face into the soft cotton of his sweater. He doesn't move except to stroke a calloused hand over your hair. You let his presence wash over you until your breathing turns more even and your fingers stop trembling.

"H-how were you able to leave Austria?" Your voice shakes, but you tilt your head up to face him. He quickly wipes away the wetness on his cheeks with a sleeve.

"I just left. The only one I told was Yuki. He said he'd cover for me. I saw the comments and I couldn't think straight. I didn't want you to believe them." The look he turns on you is an apology. "When I called and it didn't even ring, I had to get to you."

"I don't think you'll be welcomed back with open arms," You point out, and he presses a tender kiss to your brow.

"They can be pissed at me all they want. I don't care. I needed to be here." You wouldn't admit it, but he was right. The fact that he'd risked everything to comfort you helped you ignore what those users had said. Nothing could ever erase the words, but Pierre’s presence dulled their impact.

“I already petitioned for the article to be removed,” Pierre says softly. “Don’t know if it’ll amount to anything, but it’s worth a shot.”

You nod and wipe your nose on your sleeve. “It’s so much worse than I imagined.” Pierre’s cheek comes to a rest atop your head, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on your arm. “I get that I’m not the only one that loves you. But it’s like they don’t remember that I’m human.”

“People are bold when they're speaking to a screen instead of another person.”

"It was so much easier before anyone knew," You say, words dipped in longing. Rumors had never swirled when you had kept your distance, you'd made sure of it. But now that the secret was out… Would your life be spent dodging threats and dealing with negativity?

He pauses, thumb stilling. “Do you… Do you want it to go back to the way things were before? When we were... friends?"

Your head whips around. “What?”

“It isn’t fair that you have to go through this because of me,” He explains. “I hate the fact that I’m the one causing you pain. The way you’re being treated is only because I live in the spotlight.”

“It’s not your fault,” You assert, placing a hand on his stubbled cheek. “Please don’t blame yourself.”

“Maybe it would be easier if we-”

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence,” You say sternly. You force him to look at you, his eyes storming like the sea. “We’ll figure it out. Our emotions got the best of us last week. We just have to be more careful, keep this behind closed doors. We don’t need to flaunt it, right? Just tell the press that you want to keep your private life private, and I’ll take a break from social media. We can figure it out.”

Pierre nodded in agreement. His voice is scratchy, like he had swallowed gravel. “Alright.”

“It’s us against the world,” You tell him, “And I couldn’t ask for a better teammate.” Your lips ghost against his in an attempt to reassure him. He returns the kiss, firmer and more confident. Your hand slips to the nape of his neck, drawing him in as your tongue glides against his lower lip.

Last week, you’d fucked. But tonight, the sex was something else entirely. It was soft sighs and languid kisses, whispered words of adoration and promises of endless love. Above all, it was an affirmation. Pierre loved you; heart, mind, and soul. In every sense of the word. He would let nothing come between you and himself. Not his career, jealous fans, or the thousands of miles that may sometimes separate you.

Pierre offered you his heart, and you accepted it without question.

**********

The few precious hours Pierre managed to give you were enough to keep you afloat the rest of the week. The break from seemingly endless lectures helped to reset your mind and give you time to focus on yourself.

Pierre called as often as he could, and texted when he couldn’t. You filled him in on the little things you did to keep busy, like how you spent all of Sunday rearranging your tiny apartment so that your bed was as close to his in Austria as you could get it. Monday night, you fell asleep on Facetime with him as you tried and failed to write a term paper for your architectural history class.

Pierre’s visit and subsequent calls had made you feel invincible. But the moment you walk into the lecture hall on Tuesday, everyone’s eyes are on you: the first test of your newly minted confidence. Chin held high, you meet a few of their stares and take your usual seat at the front. The moment you start to question yourself, if you're ready to face the scrutiny, your phone buzzes with a text from Pierre.

Ignore them. Remember that I love you. I’ll call you tonight.

Once again, he somehow knew exactly what you needed to hear. It amazed you that a handful of carefully selected words could grant you so much strength. But it was proof that Pierre recognized and accepted your fears and was willing to help you work through them.

You take a breath, letting the whispers of your classmates fade until they were nothing more than a faint hum. You turn your focus on the professor as she enters, falling into your usual cadence. Easy. You could ignore the gossip until they got tired of it and left you alone. Their fascination couldn’t last more than a few days.

You made it through the rest of your classes and walked home without incident. No one ran up to you and demanded you explain your relationship with Pierre. Your worst fears had been abated. The stress of it rolls off your shoulders when you make it to your apartment. It was already 7 o’clock, but Pierre hadn’t called yet. Seeing as Austria was an hour ahead, you weren’t sure he would hold to his earlier promise.

Your stomach growls, and you leave your bag next to your bed before heading to the kitchen. Dinner was a box of macaroni and cheese, simple but delicious. You couldn’t stop yourself from glancing at your phone every few minutes, hoping to see Pierre’s name on the screen.

Coming to terms with the fact that you probably wouldn't be getting a call, you settle into your favorite chair and crack open your laptop. Term papers didn't write themselves, and you still had a few thousand words to write. You lost yourself in theories and articles for a few hours before your phone breaks your concentration.

You awake?

A smile splits your face. Yeah. Working on this never ending term paper.

I'll leave you to it. Love you, sleep tight.

You laugh quietly. You agree with his 'school first' mentality most of the time, but there were exceptions to every rule. You call him, heart stuttering when he answers.

"You're supposed to be writing."

"Well, nice to hear your voice too," You say playfully. "It was boring me anyway. Who wants to read twenty pages comparing Roman and Greek columns anyway?"

"I'm pretty sure your professor does," He says with a laugh that warms your bones. If only he were standing in front of you so you could feel his chest rumble beneath your fingertips. Wanting to see his face, you switch to a video call.

"I was wondering how long that would take," He teases, smile wide and welcoming.

"I miss you," You say softly, padding to your bed. You'd accomplished enough that you could push off writing more until tomorrow. "I wish I could come to Japan this weekend."

"Me too, my love," He responds, voice tinged with longing. "It's one of the more challenging circuits on the calendar. And you've always wanted to visit Tokyo."

You weren't surprised that he remembered that silly dream of yours. "Send me something that reminds me of you." You flick off the lights before climbing under the covers, pulling them up to your chin. "Something cute and sweet."

"I fly out tomorrow night to meet Charles. I should have some extra time to do some window shopping."

"You and Charles going on a date?" You tease, propping your head on a hand. Now that you were cozy, it was hard to keep your eyes open.

He shakes his head. "He's been… helping me with the press. Tackling it all."

"Oh." The mood sours. You decide not to dwell on it, turning to humor instead. "Give him a kiss for me as a thank you."

"He would love that," Pierre laughs. Comfortable silence blankets you, broken only by Pierre humming softly. It was a song you recognize as one of his favorites; it must have been stuck in his head.

"What time do I have to wake up on Sunday?" You mumble, struggling to stay awake while he was unknowingly serenading you.

"Do you want to watch the prerace stuff?" Papers shuffle softly on the other end as he figures it out for you. "If you do, probably like 3:30. If not, the race would be at five your time, so maybe 4:30."

"That's early. You're lucky I love you enough to sacrifice my beauty sleep."

He didn't hesitate before responding. "Luckily you don't need sleep to be beautiful."

Your mouth curls in a sleepy smile. "When you say things like that, I hate the distance between us even more."

Pierre scrubs a hand over his face. "I don't have a break for another month or so."

"I know."

Silence falls again, both of you lost in your own heads.

"You should sleep," He says finally, and you nod. Your first class was only 6 hours from now. "I'll sing to you if you promise to close your eyes and try to sleep."

Despite your best efforts, you yawn. You often called him for a song when you couldn't sleep and the time difference permitted it. Just hearing his voice was soothing enough, but a song? It was heaven. "Shouldn't be hard to do." Sleep came within minutes, Pierre's soft song your lullaby.

Tagging: @flashcal @sunshinesewis

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uglypastels · 4 years

Text

To the Beat // drummer!Tom 2/2

(a/n) and, as promised, here’s part 2! again big thanks to @duskholland and @captainpeggy40 <333 but a quick reminder, that i don’t often write smut, i don’t really know shit about writing smut so i actually had no business doing it... but i did it. so enjoy :) just, if its bad, don’t come for me

word count: 9117 words of filth tbh

warning: SMUT, i don’t even know what to specify. just.. 18+ okay but also, some fluff and humor cause i live by that

Please reblog if you liked it so more people can see it <3 and if you want to see more of this au, send an ask or dm <3

Read part 1 here <---> extra headcanons here

“It looks good on you,” he commented when you met at the door.

“Thanks,” there was the heat up your cheeks again. “And thank you for everything else, I had a really great night.” you were about to take the hat off to give it back, but he stopped you.

“It doesn’t have to end here, darling.” He said softly. For a second, it felt like your heart had stopped altogether. How you hoped he would say that, and then he did.

“What do you want to do?”

“I live a block away. We can- I don’t really know what we can do, to be honest.” He admitted, making both of you laugh.

“Your place sounds good,” and you stepped aside for him to lead the way. Tom opened the door but almost stopped when he saw it was raining. And it was raining hard. It had escalated from the moment you had looked out the window. Then you realised he didn’t have a jacket and was only wearing that tank top.

“I would offer you my jacket,” you said, “but I don’t think you would fit it… and I don’t have one.” You came to realise like the genius you were.

“I guess we’ll have to run for it, then.” He held out his hand. You didn’t even hesitate and grabbed it. Clutching on to the shirt and CD, you ran alongside Tom, across the street and then following it to the next right. It wasn’t really a run, but definitely a trot. The rain poured down on you, quickly soaking through all your clothes. By the time you had reached the door of his apartment building, your hair was sticking to your face, and you both looked like drenched cats. Tom grabbed his keys and unlocked the door as quickly as possible, letting you go first.

You leaned against the wall and let your breathing calm down. He did the same against the door. There was a second of silence before you started laughing. What was so funny? Neither of you knew. It just felt nice and like the right thing to do after running through the rain like idiots. Oh, so that’s what was so funny.

“Right, this way,” he pointed up the stairs. “I would suggest the elevator, but it hasn’t worked in like five years, I think.”

“Stairs are fine,” you said, already walking up.

“Wait until the fourth floor. Cause I’m not carrying you.” He joked, and you giggled, putting away the thought of him holding you in his arms and carrying you up the stairs into his home… and kissing you… throwing you onto the bed… FOCUS!

“Woah!” you almost missed a step, but luckily Tom caught you just in time.

“You okay there?”

“Yeah, just a bit slippery,” you tried to excuse your clumsiness, hoping that the fact that you were soaked from top to bottom would help. It did. Still laughing at you though, Tom helped you up and from then on you walked side by side. All the way up to the sixth floor. As exhausted as you were, you tried to play it off cool.

“Here we are.” He tapped on the door with his whole palm, and for a second you thought someone would open, but then he pulled out his keys again. A moment later you were walking into the flat. You couldn’t see much in the dark, but Tom quickly turned on the lights. It was a nice looking place—big living room with an attached kitchen. On one side there were two doors, which you assumed were his bedroom and bathroom. It was clean, but here and there some items were misplaced or left behind, making known that there was indeed a person living here.

On the wall closest to the entrance, you noticed pictures hanging. Most were of Tom and his friends and family. One stood out to you. It was an adorable little dog, smiling at the camera. When you looked over to the living room again, you noticed a red dog bed next to the couch with a bunch of squeaky toys.

“You have a dog?” you asked, already excited to see a puppy.

“Yeah, she’s called Tessa, but she’s staying with my parents and other brothers for the weekend since I would be out of the house for most of the time.”

“Ah yeah, that makes sense-” you had been looking around, not paying too much attention to Tom himself in all honesty. But then you had turned around and froze. There was Tom. Shirtless. He looked at you, slightly concerned and confused as to why you looked like that. You just had no idea what to respond with. There he was… six-pack and- and everything, in all its glory. His arms were still shining from the rain. Was this actually real?

You hadn’t noticed it before, but without the shirt, you saw how he had been wearing a necklace. A thin silver chain with some sort of charm on it that from a distance looked like a coin. He had been in the middle of fixing it when you turned around. So, there was that flexed arm to add to the things that broke your mind momentarily.

Tom stared at you, looked down at himself, then back at you. He was about to look behind himself, probably to check if there was something wrong, but then realised.

“Oh..OH. Shit.”

You were still speechless.

“See, I did not think this through. I was just gonna change my shirt.” He showed you the wet piece of cloth that was once his loose tank top. “Do you want something to wear? I don’t want you to catch a cold.” Now that you mentioned it, you were starting to shiver.

Your throat dry, you tried to mutter out, “uhh, yes. Thank you.” He nodded, walked past you and disappeared into the room you suspected to be the bedroom. He was gone for a bit, but when he came back, he was already changed. You had to hide your disappointment that he had put on a shirt, but the grey sweatpants made up for it in a way. Fuck.

“Here,” he handed you some clothes. “It’s probably not the best outfit, but it should keep you warm.”

“Thank you.” you grabbed the clothes from him. “Can I change in there?”

“Yeah, yeah, go ahead.” He got out of the way, but you only took a step before he repeated something. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“Uhm, sure. Tea?”

“Coming right up.” and he went off to the kitchen to set the kettle. You walked, uninterrupted, to the other room. It was, like assumed, the bedroom with not much there except for a closet and a large bed. It did look really comfortable though. And made up. You wished your bedroom looked this clean.

You took off your wet clothes, which was quite the challenge since it all stuck to your skin and your jeans wouldn’t budge from their place. The clothes Tom had provided were some shorts that seemed like he used for training or whatever exercise he did and a sweater. You had wanted to wear your new Winter Solstice t-shirt but, of course, that had soaked through as well. So, you put on the sweater and knew immediately that that was the better choice. It was soft and warm. Plus, the idea of wearing his clothes was also touching to the heart.

You walked out of the room as Tom was pouring the boiling water into two mugs. He looked over at you with a smile.

“How do you take it?” He was opening the fridge, ready to take out the milk.

“Honey and lemon, but it’s fine if you don’t have that.” you quickly added.

“Please, you’re talking to the tea expert here.” He took out a bottle of lemon juice, the same out you always buy you noticed, and a jar of honey from the cupboard. As he did that, you looked around some more in the room. The large leather couch was definitely the centre point of the room, with the large tv in front of it, accompanied by a PlayStation. There was a bookcase filled with… well, books, but also CD’s, records and different little things between them. You looked around, hoping to find a drum set somewhere, but there was none. Which made sense. You didn’t expect the neighbours to be too fond of drumming as a pastime hobby.

“We practice at Harrison’s place. He soundproofed his place.” Tom explained, seeing how you were looking around cluelessly. He handed you your cup as you both sat down on the couch. Fearing for your tongue, you carefully took the first sip, but it was surprisingly pleasant. He must have poured in some cold water to cool it down, just the right amount too. As soon as the tea got into your system, you felt the warmth go through your entire body. It was absolutely fantastic.

Still, you had to admit, it was a strange situation. Never would you have imagined to go to a concert and then, later on, go out for a late-night meal with the drummer, and now to be drinking tea on his couch.

“You don’t do this often, do you?” You quizzed. Tom looked up from his mug.

“Do what?”

“This. Take a girl out to eat, bring her home, undress in front of her… make her tea.” you elaborated on your question.

“The tea making, yeah, that’s new.” He sipped his tea with a slurp.

“Well, I’m glad to be the first then.” You knew he had meant it jokingly, so why not just go along with it?

You drank your tea together in silence. It all had this strange domestic feeling that was very nice, but by far not what you thought would be doing with Tom that night. But eventually, the tea had been drunk. You were sitting on opposite ends of the sofa. At one point you had put your legs on top of his. You could see that he was thinking about something.

“Penny for your thoughts?” you asked. He had been staring at the coffee table, mumbling the Flintstones theme song to himself and tapping his fingers along to the melody on your leg. You had clearly pulled him out of a trance.

“Do you wanna dance?”

“What?”

“Sorry, I was just thinking, we can sit here the whole night until we fall asleep, or we can put on some music and dance. Just a suggestion.” He was full of surprises, this guy.

“Yeah, sure.” You got up and pulled him by the hands to follow you. “Sounds fun. Pick a song” You thought he would just get out his phone and get a Bluetooth speaker, but boy were you wrong. He moved over to the bookcase with his music collection. You tried to look over his shoulder at what record he had picked, but he pulled it out of the sleeve quickly and put it under the needle of the record player.

As the needle scratched between songs, he walked back to you. The music that he picked was slow, and it felt perfect for the moment as he took your hand in his and let the other softly touch your side. You weren’t the most excellent dancer but knew enough that you had to put your free arm on his shoulder.

The two of you moved around the room slowly, to the beat of the song. You put your head on his chest and could hear his heart beating along, well a bit faster. You could see his necklace poking out from underneath his shirt, so you let go of his shoulder to pull it out.

“It’s nice,” you smiled, a bit dazed, playing with the charm between your fingers. You could hear him chuckle a thank you.

The song was new to you. It was a simple melody, the singing was soft and intimate. As you spun around in Tom’s arms, it felt like the words were speaking to you directly. What was it again? You couldn’t remember exactly. Feeling him so close next to you, everything else was just a blur. Just like when he sang-

“Wait, is this you?” you looked up at him. He just smiled.

“Oh my god, it is!” Way to ruin the moment, but the song had already ended, and it was the only one on that side of the small record. “You guys have records?”

“We got ourselves an EP copy each,” he explained, scratching the back of his head. “I hoped you would like it.”

“I- I do.”

You looked into his eyes, trying- hoping- to see what he was thinking. They were flickering golden brown in the soft and warm light of the room. Then you saw it. That one sign you were looking for. It was just a fracture of a second. If you had blinked, you were sure you would have missed it. But you did see it. You saw how his eyes quivered down to your lips and back up to meet your eyes again.

He held your hand in his, the other was on your waist. He pulled you in closer—your chest against his. You could feel how shaky his breath was against your cheek. You lost your battle with self-control as you dared to glance down at his lips. They looked so soft. So inviting.

And you took that invitation gladly. Pressing your lips against his. He stumbled back a step, not expecting the push. He let go of your hand so he could hold you firmly against his chest. In the meantime, your hands wandered off to his hair. It was still wet from the rain, making it easier for you to comb through it. The kiss itself intensified with each lasting second.

A sound escaped you as he grabbed onto your leg, just to drag you off to the couch. He sat, giving you easy access to sit on his lap. You sat down with great pleasure.

If the air wasn’t such a necessity in life, it would have been likely you would have never pulled away, but alas. You parted your lips just enough to stop your lungs from burning. Tom took that moment to brush off a strand of hair behind your ear. A classic little move but you fell for it immediately. The feeling of his fingers against your skin. It felt sinful. It was only your cheek. Just thinking about his touch all over your body gave you that rush to kiss him again.

As he kept on holding your waist with one hand, the other made its way to your thigh, squeezing it gently. That little gesture made you jump up. Unplanned, was the friction between your and his hips. You couldn’t hear it, but you felt him hold back the moan.

“Fuck, don’t hold it in,” as frustrating it was to pull away, it had to be said. “Please,” you panted.

“Whatever you want, baby.” He leaned in to kiss you again, but this time he went lower down to your jawline. You held on to the back of his head and shoulder for support as he kissed and nipped at your skin, moving down to your neck.

Your body was starting to feel hotter and hotter. The once so comfortable sweater was just an inconvenient restriction at this point. And Tom felt that too. To your disappointment, his hands left your body to tug at the hem of the sweater. Before taking it off, however, he looked you in the eyes.

“You sure about this?”

“Yes,” you breathed out.

“But, if you ever wanna stop, just tell me, okay?”

“Yes.” How he managed to form full sentences, that was a mystery. You put your arms up, letting Tom take off the sweater. He threw it over the edge of the couch. Not a second later, your lips were together once again. Even though it only had been a minute, two max, it felt like an eternity that you had to get through to touch him again.

His fingers moved slowly over your body. Every inch he moved, followed with a burning sensation as if he was on fire. Burning you gradually, in the best way possible. One thing just felt off. So, you tugged at his shirt.

“I’m not doing all the work, babe,” he said with a grin. You rolled your eyes at his comment, but it wasn’t as if you really minded undressing him. You grabbed the shirt and slowly pulled it up to his chest. One by one, his muscles showed themselves, and you had to control the urges that started building up in the pit of your stomach. You pulled the shirt. Tom already had his arms up, ready to get the fabric off. If only he knew about your plan that started forming in your head.

The hem of the shirt just touched his lip when you put it in his mouth. He was about to spit it out, but you stopped him.

“Just wait, okay.” He kissed his cheek sweetly, making him roll his eyes at you. As slowly as possible, you slid off his lap. He wanted to make a grab at your hips, but you pushed his hands off… with difficulty, cause fuck, if it didn’t feel right to have him touch you.

The only way to let him leave you alone was intertwining your fingers, and letting your hands fall to his sides. He saw how you planted your feet on the ground so to make it easier for the both of you he spread his legs. It was a golden sight. With a big smile on your face, you leaned in, kissing his chest. It immediately received the reaction you hoped for. With the fabric in his mouth, Tom groaned softly, but still very audibly in the quiet room. When you looked up, you saw him tugging at the shirt as he tried to pull his head up, tensing his jaw. He could have just spit it out if he really wanted it gone… but he didn’t.

Thought it safe, you let go of his hands. They stayed in place next to his thighs. You moved closer to him to continue the feather-light kisses along his smooth skin. With each touch, his chest heaved in deep and heavy inhaled. You kept going. Kiss after kiss, moving lower and lower. You couldn’t help it but lick down that line of his abs, across that gorgeous tummy of his. And it was good too, rewarded with a beautiful growl from Tom. You could have said it was the best thing you had heard that night, but you had listened to a lot of good things that night… and who knew what was still to come.

You left one last kiss below his belly button, exactly to meet the elastic band of his underwear. A part of you wanted to snap it, but that felt a bit too cruel considering you almost made him swallow his shirt. You looked up again. It was a magnificent sight, Tom holding that hemline in his mouth, gritting his teeth as his chest moved up and down, needing and hoping for a release. He looked down at you too, and his eyes were black with lust. You could see him clenching his fists.

That was a sign of continuing. Unlike before, you quickly started to unbutton his trousers. You were too focused on your little task to look at Tom, but you saw him roll his head on the backrest of the couch. You unzipped the pants and pulled them down with a few tugs.

You almost felt bad seeing how hard he got in those few moments. Almost. Just a little bit more teasing wouldn’t hurt, right? Tom had other ideas. He pulled out the shirt from his mouth, tugged it off in one swift move, and threw it behind him. He glared down at you. “I swear if you don’t suck me off right now-”

“Or what?” you challenged him. This clearly took him aback, but only for a second. Then, this twinkle in his eye appeared, telling you that there was not a saint thought in his mind at that moment. He leaned over, only an inch away from your face. His words were like a high, each one giving you precisely the right rush of adrenaline you needed.

“Suck my cock, Princess, or I’ll just have to fuck that pretty mouth myself.”

And you were gonna let him, but a more significant part of you didn’t want to give up that easily. So, for now, you let out a soft whimper and nodded. Tom kissed you softly on the lips before sitting back up straight. He looked like a king on a fucking throne, with that proud and smug grin. It was giving you the greatest pleasure to ruin that little moment of his.

You palmed him through his boxers, moving your hand up and down, then leaned in yourself to kiss it, still through the fabric. Tom hissed out a moan, and right then, you knew you were golden. One more little kiss and you reached out for the border of his underwear. You were about to pull it down-

And then you got up.

“What the fuck-”

“I’m gonna get some water, I think.” And just like that you hopped over to the little kitchen and grabbed yourself a glass. As you were pouring yourself the water, you could hear him shuffling his feet out of his trousers. You could hear him walk up behind you. As you were about to touch the brim of the glass against your lips, you felt him push against your back. His hard-on was more than evident. He moved his fingers into your hips as he whispered into your ear, making your body shake from anticipation.

“So, you wanna play games, huh?” His tone was nothing but filthy. “You could have just said so, I mean I got Monopoly somewhere in the closet.” His left hand drifted off, moving up your side. You were still holding that damn glass of water, body frozen.

“Or I could turn on the PlayStation, whatever you want darling.” He kissed you just below the ear. His hand was sliding across the valley between your breast, tracing up to your neck.

“Hmm, tell me, what do you want?”

“I- I-” you couldn’t think straight. With him talking like that and his soft touch, it was too much.

“Speak up, baby.”

“I want...Aah!! What the fuck!” Suddenly his touch was gone, and you felt something ice-cold cover your torso. You had still been holding up that glass of water, and when Tom got close enough, he tipped it over with his finger, letting all the cold content spill out on you. Goosebumps formed all over your body, and you shrieked out in pure shock.

“Oops,” he giggled and pecked you on the cheek. Before you could say another word, he was walking away, in the direction of his bedroom. Not looking around, he held up his hand.

“Counting to four and then you better be here, without those ugly shorts.”

“They’re yours,” you said as he opened the door, still shivering from the cold water. He opened the door and was gonna close it but then quickly said-

“So? I have horrible taste. Take ‘em off, darling,” and he closed it. You could hear him count from the other side.

ONE

You quickly pushed off the, indeed, not great looking shorts.

TWO

You started walking up to the bedroom. The butterflies in your stomach had left the cage and were going crazy.

THREE

Almost at the door.

FOUR

You opened it. There stood Tom. He didn’t even hide the way he was checking you out. In only a bra and panties, there was little you could hide behind, but you tried to fight the insecurities.

“Fuck, you’re perfect.” He said before striding your way. Grabbing on to you, he kissed you passionately. You felt his hand in your hair, so you mimicked it. For the rest, you had no idea what was going on since you had closed your eyes. You let all the other senses speak for themself—his soft but harsh touch; the way you could still smell the rain on him—the sweet taste of honey and tea on his lips. You could hear the little grunts and whimpers escape the both of you as he slammed you against the door with a thud.

Then he grabbed your leg, signally for you to jump. You did without hesitation. Arms around his neck, fingers tangled into the hair at the nape of his neck. You kissed him feverishly. The fact that he was holding you up with only one hand hadn’t even caught up to you. The hand that was leaning against the door next to your face was not even registered by your addled brain yet.

Feeling the need for air again, you pulled away. Your foreheads were leaning against each other as you both inhaled deeply.

“What happened to fucking my mouth, Tommy?” You quipped. Tom was staring down, looking at how your chest heaved deeply with every breath.

“Would take too long,” he said, now looking up into your eyes. “I thought it would be better to just straight up start with your sweet little cunt.” He growled into your ear. Before you could say anything in response, he kissed you again.

His words were still spinning around in your head as he pushed the two of you away from the wall and carried you across the room to the bed. You could feel his erection against you, hard as a fucking rock. Why did you pull away from him on the couch?

He put his knee on the mattress before letting you drop. It made you think back to just a few hours ago, how you had fallen down on to your own bed, contemplating whether or not to go to some dumb concert… now look at you.

Your head touched the soft bedding, but your legs were still around Tom’s middle. He grabbed your legs and spread them just the right way so he could lean closer to you.

“You look so fucking hot, right now.” He groaned as his teeth grazed your neck, making you arch your back. He pinned you back down on the bed.

“Seeing you in that crowd, you know how hard it was for me to concentrate?” At this point, he had your arms above your head, holding them tightly. He kissed your jawline and moved up to your ear, tugging at your earlobe just that little bit, enough to make you quiver. You didn’t realise he actually wanted an answer until you felt the harsh sting of him slapping your thigh. Just enough to send that spark up to where you needed him the most.

“Fuck,” you moaned, “No, Tommy, I didn’t.”

“Hmm, thought so. But I saw you staring at me. Checking me out, huh? I had to really control myself to not just grab you and fuck you out there, right on my drumset.” His free hand, the one that wasn’t holding back your arms, was getting closer to your pussy. Your entire body was pulsing and shaking, needing for him to do something. Anything.

“Just imagine that, Princess,” he was whispering into your ear again, “you bouncing on my dick, in front of all of those people.”

“Fuuck,” you had never been much into exhibitionism, but hearing him speak like that, everything sounded good.

Suddenly you felt his fingers move over your underwear. It was just for a moment, him passing through from one thigh to the other, but it was enough to have you moan out his name in need.

“Tsk, behave, darling,” he kissed your forehead. So sweetly, it almost seemed as if he wasn’t about to fuck the complete hell out of you. “You’re gonna behave for me, right?”

“Yes. Just please- please do something.” You pleaded, which gave great pleasure to Tom.

“Good to know we got that little attitude from earlier sorted out, huh? I really didn’t want to punish you.” He didn’t? So what the hell was this torture? Of course, it all felt amazing, but if he would cross his fingers one more time next to your clit, you might actually explode.

“Now, I think I’m going to finger your little pussy, okay Princess,” He asked with that sweet tone. You could feel his fingertips move across the fabric of your panties. “Yeah, I think you’d like that huh, look how fucking soaked you are.” With his thumb he pressed over your clit, moving down through the slit. You moaned out, finally feeling some kind of relief from him.

He kissed your neck as he finally moved your underwear to the side.

“You’re so pretty and needy, you know that?” he said, smiling. You nodded your head, biting your lip in anticipation of what he was gonna do next. You had your eyes closed and opened them for a moment. Tom was right above you. He sent you an air kiss for extra measure. You tried to focus on his eyes instead of the sensation you felt every time one of his fingers was getting closer to push into you. Still, whimpers escaped you. Which he enjoyed immensely.

Then he finally did it. Two fingers, deep inside, stretching your walls. You moaned out in pure relief, ecstatic to finally feel something inside you. Tom let you adjust for a second until he started to move slowly in and out, making momentum. Not that he forgot about your clit. Oh no, he rubbed it until you were seeing stars in front of you,

“I’m going to let go of you, alright?” You were ready to nod at his question, but he added more on to it. “But since you do like playing games so much-” here it comes, you knew it, “let’s make it a bit of a game. I’ll let go of you, and then you got, let’s say, three seconds to pick a new place for them. And then you better stick with it too, cause I don’t want to see you move until you come, understood?”

“Yes, Tommy.” you gasped more so than said.

“Good.” He kissed you but quickly started to move down. You knew what was going to happen, you had been waiting for it. But he was still holding on to you. Right as his mouth had passed your stomach, he let go of your wrists. Without thinking about it, you planted your fingers in his hair.

“Hmm, good choice, darling.” He mumbled against the skin of your hip. You brushed your fingers through his hair, not sure what else to do while waiting for him to-

Then, he pushed your panties aside completely. You felt his tongue, and it made you roll your eyes to the back of your head. He held on to your leg with one arm, the fingers of the other were still moving in and out of you. You held on to his hair, holding on for dear life. For a second that thought of possibly hurting him flashed through your mind, but then that melodic groan went through him, and the vibrations of his voice passed through your body like an electric shock.

He kept moving his tongue in a way that made you sure he was trying to spell something out, possibly his own name, but you simply couldn’t make anything of it. You could barely concentrate on your own breathing, let alone words.

Tom pulled you closer to him, deeper, making you moan like you never had before. Now, you had your fair share of experience, but he was… extraordinary. He took his time, made sure to give every minuscule part of you the attention it needed. Almost as if he wanted to hit every single nerve and cell individually. You weren’t even sure if he did it for your pleasure or because of his own.

Did it matter?

From the way how you could feel the knot in your stomach tighten, clearly not.

“To-tom.” you gasped out. You were close. So close. But he didn’t need your words to know that. But it wasn’t enough for him. So, instead of going deeper, harder, faster, he sucked at your clit one last time before licking his way over to your thigh. You could have screamed in agony.

“Tom!” you did.

You wanted to let go of him and get up. Pull him up to you, maybe get on top even. But you remembered his words. I don’t want to see you move until you come. As much as you wanted to know what would happen if you broke that little rule, you also wanted to listen.

And so, you let out your frustration through digging your nails into his hair, but it had the exact opposite effect on Tom that you hoped for. Any time you would pull, even the tiniest bit, he would grab your thigh even harder, pulling himself to you. And he just kept on toying with you. Playing with your clit until that familiar knot was tying itself up in you, only to pull away and suck another perfect little hickey on your thighs. You had lost count how many times he had already marked you. On top of that, every time his lips would pull away, so would his fingers. Pull out just enough, only leaving his fingertips in you, to get you on that next edge of frustration, to make you beg for more.

“Tom, pleeease,” you begged. Tears were already forming in your eyes. It didn’t help that he would take that stupid necklace of his and put it against your burning skin. The cold metal of the charm always managed to come up against a new mark that Tom had left behind.

“Tell me what you want, darling,” he said, kissing your sensitive skin between the words. You had to take all the power left in you to form the semi-coherent sentence.

“I want- want to come. Please, Tom.” Your head was spinning, body flushed and hot, sweat and tears mixing at your temples.

“You only had to say so.” His voice was the opposite of yours, composed and relaxed. You felt his smirk against you as he left one last kiss on you. The finally-

The easiest way to describe it was that he had gone wild. Animalistic. He devoured you as if he was a starving man, and you the last meal on earth. Then there were his fingers, moving at a rapid pace, but still so steady. You could feel it nearing. So fucking close. You couldn’t hold it in any longer. Your legs were shaking, and all your other muscles were practically rigid from how tense you were. You needed to let go now. Feel that release at last.

At last, yes. With a scream, you felt it all relax. Your body came undone in a wave of pleasure. You were melting into the bed, Tom being the only thing keeping you somewhat conscious of your surroundings.

You tried to concentrate on the feeling of his lips, licking one final line over your clit. It shook you to your core. You whimpered, not being able to take much more. Your body went limp, you let go of his hair.

“Shhh,” he was moving up. Kissing your body, snaking his way back up to look into your eyes. The cold touch of the necklace followed behind. You opened your eyes, but everything was blurry. After blinking a few times, you could finally see him, drenched in your juices, with the biggest grin on his face.

He parted his lips just the tiniest bit, and you followed him blindly. You felt his fingers on your lips and without thinking, put them in your mouth. The taste of yourself, together with the feeling of his fingers tasted like the best damn thing ever.

“That’s right,” he kissed your tear-stained cheek, “you’re my good girl, aren’t you?”

You nodded, closing your eyes. It was all too much, you had to cut off one of your senses before it was too late.

“I wish you could see how beautiful you looked right now. So fucked out- and I haven’t even had my good fun with you yet.”

You wanted to protest, but it was too difficult to speak. Besides, your fingers felt too good in your mouth to let them go for some pathetic little words. It wasn’t worth it.

But like all good things in life, it had to end. He pulled his fingers out of your mouth. Having no control left over your body, you let a whine escape you at the loss of touch.

“Christ, you’re needy,” he said before kissing you deeply, but shortly before he finished his statement. “I love it.” His hands were roaming your body. He held up your leg just so he could get in the position to squeeze your ass.

“Hold on to me, baby,” he murmured between another kiss. You did your best, still feeling no energy in your limbs. You crossed your arms behind his neck, feeding on the kiss for the strength to move. He held you as he pulled the both of you up to sit on the bed. And he kept holding on to you when he thrust his right hand to your back, to the strap of your bra. He moved his fingers around, looking for the clasp. Even in your dazed state, it made you laugh a little.

“It’s upfront,” you mumbled, kissing the corner of his mouth. He moved away to look at you, confused. You pointed down at the front of your bra.

“So you’re telling me,” he flicked it open, letting your breast basically spill out in front of him, “I could have had this view this whole time? Fuck!” He pulled the straps down your shoulders to take it off.

“Sorry?” you said, not sure if you really needed to apologise.

“No, don’t be.” He threw the bra to the floor. Almost on the spot where you had changed. It really wasn’t that long ago, but it felt like it. Had you thought of this happening when you put on his sweater? Maybe? In a sense. It was an option. But nothing would have prepared you for this.

How could you have even thought about sitting on his lap, your legs around his waist, your arms on his shoulders, as he held you? Because of this, this wasn’t just some simple fuck. You hoped it wasn’t, at least. The way you held each other and how there was nothing but the passion between you- or was it possible that it didn’t mean that much to him?

Still, that orgasm he gave you was the best you have had in a long time. So if it was only for the night, then let it be. You could still get a good time out of it, and you would not let your mind ruin this.

Luckily for you too, Tom’s kisses made you shut off your thoughts reasonably quickly. It wouldn’t even matter if the world had been ending.

But kissing could only get you so far. And he clearly had the same thought. Panting, his hot breath hitting your neck, he asked you.

“Are you ready for this, babe?” You nodded. “I need to hear it, please.”

“Yes. Just fuck me already.”

“Perfect.” with a peck on the cheek, he let go of you and let you slip off his lap. He got off the bed. You sat on your knees, hands next to your legs, looking at him in anticipation. It was insane how he had managed to eat you out while his cock was rock hard. You could see the outline of it through his underwear, leaving nothing, but really nothing, to the imagination.

You watched him do a little jiggle, making you laugh, before taking the band off his boxer shorts and pulling it down. To say your mouth started to water, would sound ridiculous, but you weren’t so far from that state. He wasn’t too long, or too thick, you didn’t expect it to be anyway, but it looked just right to send you over into another dimension. There was that one vein going along his shaft that you couldn’t get enough of. Unconsciously, you were moving over to the edge of the bed. Just seeing him completely naked in front of you, send your mind into a frenzy. It was a magnificent view.

What couldn’t go unnoticed was how red the tip had gone, from pure arousal and frustration that he needed to relieve. How badly you wanted to help him. You moved closer to the bed end, he took a step closer to you. He had his hand on his cock but didn’t move a muscle. If he did, you thought, he might have exploded right there in the spot. And what would be the fun in that?

“Fuck,” he groaned, standing in front of you. “You look so fucking perfect on your knees.”

You didn’t say anything, just smiled. The energy was coming back into your body, slowly, and you could feel getting that independence back that Tom had so rudely taken away from you. So, without saying anything, you took him in your hand and started to move up and down, not breaking eye contact, well, until Tom’s head rolled back. You couldn’t blame him.

You kept on stroking him, steadily, leaving kisses every few seconds on his tip. The pre-cum started leaking almost instantaneously, which you gladly used to spread all over his tip, making it much easier to move your hand around. Your kisses in the meantime got sloppier each time, longer. Until you were basically just kitten licking that vein that was taunting you before.

The sounds that were coming from Tom were adding to the whole experience in the best way. His moans and grunts were sending you to the edge, so far that you couldn’t help but let your free hand wander down and rub your clit. And it didn’t go unnoticed by Tom.

“Even when sucking my dick, you need more, huh?” He asked as he looked down, right when you had finally put the tip in your mouth, twirling your tongue around it. The fact that you tried to look up into his eyes all innocent like should have sent him flying from laughter, but instead, he put his hand on your head and softly started to stroke your hair.

“Thought so,” he grunted. His hand stayed in your hair as you let your jaw slack and you made your way down his shaft, all the way till you could feel him touch the back of your throat. His grip got tighter, he didn’t move anything, but you just felt him grab your hair in his fist. Just enough to tell you to move without hurting you. He would have probably said it in words, but when you looked up, you saw how twisted his face was in pure delight.

You started to move in a paced way, but eventually, it felt too slow for Tom. That hand in your hair came to final use as he began to guide your movement. Letting you practically choke on him every time he moved up with the tempo. You felt the tears coming again as the drool fell from your mouth. You were an absolute mess, but it didn’t bother you one bit.

He kept going, fucking your mouth just like he had promised on the couch earlier.

“You know,” he said between pants, “As much as I’d love to cum in your mouth-” he hissed in pleasure when he hit the back of your throat again. “I swear the things you do to me, darling.”

He let go of you and pulled out. You gasped for air, finally having a free passage of air to come through to your lungs. Tom wiped some of the drool from your mouth before leaning in to kiss you. He closed you in by placing his arm next to you and slowly let you fall on your back again.

“Jesus,” he panted after the kiss. He looked at your mouth before gazing into your eyes again. You couldn’t imagine that it looked great, with your makeup completely smudged, but he smiled. “Would it be crazy to say that I love you right now?”

“I’ve heard crazier,” you said back, also out of breath.

“Oh yeah?”

You just shrugged. He let out an airy laugh that you could feel against your face. You closed your eyes, just for a second, to enjoy the moment. This small speck of time in the universe, where it was only you and him, where nothing else mattered. Just two strangers having a great time. Would there be more after this? Who was to say? It didn’t matter. Not to you, at least.

The little moment was ruined when you heard him curse. Suddenly the weight of the bed shifted, as he moved from hovering on top of you. You opened your eyes.

“What’s wrong?”

He was already on the side of the bed, leaning out to reach the drawer of the bedside table.

“Condom,” he muttered out, still trying to reach it. Not that he could just move up a bit and slide the thing open with ease. He liked feeling you underneath him. And you did too.

Finally, he managed to open the drawer and had to move up a bit to reach into it. You could hear his patting on the wood, but there was no sound of packaging.

“Fuck, wait a second.” He got up with a small jump and ran off, leaving you basically naked and alone on the bed. You sat and finally took off your panties. It was no surprise that they were completely soaked. You threw them on the ground next to your bra.

The drawer was still open, and you bit your lip at the thought of looking inside it. You could tell a lot by a person’s bedside table. And it was already open… just a peek wouldn’t hurt? Right?

You moved closer to the table and leaned in to look. There was not much inside-just a charger, a book (but it was too dark in the room to read the small print of the title), a glasses case and a small notebook and pen. On the notebook, you saw scratched “WS”. Winter Solstice? Was it possibly lyrics? You didn’t go as far as going into that.

As you had been looking, you could hear him rummaging through stuff in the room next door, the bathroom.

Having seen everything there was to see in the drawer, you decided to just lie down on the bed, looking for a comfortable position, but also something that Tom would enjoy seeing when he walked into the room. Right then, the door opened, and Tom walked in. His one hand over his crotch and the other holding a box of condoms.

“Sorry, I couldn’t find them at first, turned out they were- fuck.” He was looking at the box and hadn’t seen you lying there immediately. When he finally did, he almost dropped the condoms, only catching them with his other hand at the last second.

“You think you can get on your knees for me, darling?”

“I can try,” you shrugged, already turning around. You could hear him curse to himself as he saw you sit there. Then the ripping off the wrapper. He was taking his time for sure, which you didn’t really mind. You just weren’t really sure if your arms would be able to hold yourself up. You could already feel them shaking.

“I really fucked you up, didn’t I, love?” You felt his cold hand on your ass, squeezing and kneading gently.

“Yeah, I guess so-Ah,” you moaned as he slapped the spot he had been so gentle with just a second before. At that touch, your left arm gave in, and you lost balance, falling with your face into the blanket. The nicely made up bed now only smelled of sweat and sex and you really weren’t mad at it.

“Fuck, c’mere,” he groaned, pulling you in by your waist, so your back was against his chest. You yelped out at the sudden movement and looked over your shoulder to look at his face. He was looking down at your chest. Hard nipples begging for attention from his hands and then they finally got it. As he kissed your shoulder, he started to play carefully pull at them, making sure your reaction was nothing but good. He got what he looked for when your hand reached out for his while you moaned.

Then there was that cock of his, between your legs at this point, teasing you. Tom let go of your chest, allowing you to replace it with your own hand. You tried to ignore the tickling sensation as his fingers danced over your naked body, moving down to your legs. He grabbed his shaft and, for worst or best, slapped your pussy with it.

“Tommm,” you whined, just needing to feel him inside you.

“Alright, sorry. I just couldn’t help myself.” He kissed your neck as he finally slid into you. Those two feelings together made you roll your eyes so far back you thought you had gone blind for a moment. He spread your walls and filled you up perfectly, like the strangest fucking puzzle. You reached up to grab his hair again. There was just something about it, how it was so messy and you were the cause of it, that turned you on. And by the way, he smiled as you tugged at it, you could tell he loved it as well.

Tom kept on pounding into you at this perfect rhythm, to no surprise. You wouldn’t have expected anything less from a drummer. He was rough, deep, hitting every spot he needed to at just the right time. And with every thrust, you felt yourself getting closer. Already so sensitive from the previous orgasm and the way he had utterly destroyed your mouth, there was really not much you needed to get there again.

But it didn’t mean that he put in any less effort. Tom took each and every thrust with the precision you deserved. He kissed every inch of your skin available to his lips.

It didn’t take long for you to come undone again. The moans coming from your mouth were all he needed to get there too. The way he groaned into your ear as he came could have sent you going for another round, but your legs were shaking like crazy. If it wasn’t for the way he held you, you would have most definitely fallen.

His hand fell to your stomach, holding you tightly. Out of reflex, you reached out for it, intertwining your fingers. He pulled out of you. The sudden emptiness in you was the final straw for your legs to give up, your knees spread, making you slide down past Tom’s body a little. Heavy breathing from both of you filled the room—his chest against your back. Your heart beats mixing together into one.

He held you close to him until you could somewhat control your breathing. He sat down and carefully put you down so you could lay down on the bed. You watched as he took off the condom and threw it into the small bin in the corner of the room. He grabbed his underwear and put it on quickly.

“Let’s get you something to wear, shall we,” he smiled at the sight of you lying in his bed, exhausted, naked, with the most sheepish smile on your face. You nodded, expecting him to grab the sweater from the living room, but instead, he opened the closet and took a shirt that was folded on the top shelf. He sat down on the bed and helped you sit up as you got the shirt over your head.

You noticed it was another Winter Solstice shirt, but it had a different design on it. It didn’t have that scratchy writing on it. Instead, the letters flowed smoothly into each other in an intricate cursive pattern. Underneath it, there was a sketch of a crescent moon.

“It’s a design we think about using if we do any other shows,” he explained before you could ask. “The other one was cheaper so we could get more.”

“I do hope you’ll play more shows,” you admitted as you lay down on the pillow. You thought he would join you, but instead, he got up. Clearly, he saw the panic in your face because he quickly explained: “I’m just gonna get you some water.”

“No, stay,” it came out a bit more whiny than you intended it to, “I’m fine.”

“You sure?” He raised an eyebrow but still sat down next to you. You patted the other pillow motioning for him to join you in the horizontal position, which he eventually did with pleasure. You scooted over to be closer. By doing so, though, the shirt moved up, only just covering your breast.

Tom put his hand on your side, tapping mindlessly, you focused on it, trying to figure out a pattern, but nothing came to mind. You put your arm under your head for some more support, and you looked at him while his eyes were on your body. He seemed to be deep in thought again, just like back on the couch before you started dancing. His tapping transformed into his fingers moving around over your skin in small shapes.

“You know,” he said, still drawing little pictures on your side, “I’d really hate for this to just be a one-night thing.” He looked up into your eyes.

“As long as you make me some more tea again, we’re good.” you leaned in to kiss him through each other's soft laughs. Of course, it wouldn’t be a one-time thing. You didn’t want it to be. You were completely hooked on him. Ever since you had seen him sitting at that bar. To think it was only a few hours ago.

The END

> Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed > please reblog and leave a comment or ask with your thoughts. i love reading them >masterlist and link to taglist in bio

tagging:

@definitely-not-black-cat @artemisiaarm @nerdyhockeygirl @miraclesoflove @justasmisunderstoodasloki @thefridgeismybestie @m19friend @creative-happenings @parker-holland-osterfield @fanficparker @fanficscuziranout @peterparkoure @xxtomxo @happywolves81 @captainbuckyy @tra-gicx @qxeen-of-hearts @varshavisuu @kangaroobunny @petersunderoos96 @the-lost-fairy-tale @nerd-domland @sleepybesson @rissa067 @the-queen-procrastinator @scarletteclipze @screeching-student-unknown @tomhollanders2013 @miraclesoflove @playinonaloop @captainpeggy40 @queenoflostspirits @roses-hxlland @hereiamhereigo @sunnydays0803 @averyfosterthoughts @moorehollandplz @beiroviski @you-bleed-just-toknowyouarealive @peterparkerbabyyy @multifandomlover21 @lmaotshollandd @badbitchydecisions @tikapollak @starkeybabie @awesomehritz @madzleigh01 @oh-what a beautiful-parker @taciturnspidey @quaksonhehe @mountainsforwords @harryfobter @peepeeparkerr @viagracex @ethereal-beauty-p @perspectiveparker @slytherin-chaser @worldoftom @moonysoftt @peeterparkr @wazzupmrstark @saintlavrents @peachybloomss @blissfulparker @spidey-reids-2003 @fallinfortom @chloecreatesfictions @londonspidey @hollandcreep @inlovewithmobtom

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland smut #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfiction #smut #tom holland fanfic #tom holland imagine #tom holland au #band!au #drummer!tom au #drummer!tom #au #strangers to lovers #not even gonna lie #i have a love hate relationship with writing smut #cause i love the content #but to write it #i want to punch myself in the face

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redisriding · 4 years

Text

I finished ACOSF last night, and I absolutely loved it. It didn’t go in the direction that I thought it was going to go in, not that I really had a strong idea as to where the story was going to go, and honestly, I was just happy to read anything about Nesta and Cassian.

I do however have some thoughts:

Spoilers below…

- I think the book could have done with a better edit. A long time was spent at the House of Wind, and maybe this slow progression towards the climatic 100 pages or so is to reflect Nesta’s own slow struggles with dealing with her mental health, but compared to ACOWAR which covered SO MUCH ground, this was a little slow for me.

- Related to this, I think there were some scenes that SJM put in just because she wanted Nesta and Cassian in those situations rather than things happening to be integral to the plot.

- Actually, I found the plot a little lacking, both in the fantasy side and the romance. Again, some of the scenes just seemed loose strung together than driving the story in any real direction.

- That said, I think this book did a lot of leg work for the set up in the next books, so WATCH THIS SPACE.

- In respect of Nesta obtaining the Mask, Harp and Crown, I thought those scenes moved a little quickly, I would have loved to have had some more drama/suspense in these elements, maybe making the scenes longer and cutting back a little on all the House of Wind training session scenes.

- This is particularly true in respect of the last 100 pages in the book. If the Blood Rite was going to happen I would have loved to see more of it. It all just seemed a little easy for Nesta, Gwyn and Emerie having only trained for a few months up against Illyrian warriors who had been training for years, and it being something that Rhys, Cass, and Az really struggled to achieve. Again, I would have had this section of the book extended, maybe making up the last 200 pages of the book (and really ramping up the tension) at the loss of some of the training scenes.

- Connected to this, Cassian and his espionage with Az while Nesta was in the Blood Rite. I would have loved a little more internal dialogue here, to see Cass really suffering knowing that his mate was in the Blood Rite, but again, this was rather glossed over.

- The scene however when Cassian hugged Nesta and then whispered into her hair that he had to kill her was PHENOMENAL. My heart honestly skipped a beat when I read that. Again, would have like an extended battle scene - student beating the master kind of thing.

- Speaking of my heart skipping a beat…I love a slow burn, and actually think some of the Nesta/Cassian scenes in ACOWAR were more tension building than the scenes in ACOSF. That said, maybe a slow burn was never going to be on the cards for this pair, it just doesn’t really suit their personalities (Elriel, anyone?) and I certainly wasn’t complaining about all the spicy hot scenes of them fucking each other. After a while though, I needed some more emotional investment, and Gods did I get that with the solstice scene. Again, wish it had come a little earlier in the book, but I have no real complaints.

- I wish we’d been in Cassian’s head a bit more for when that mating bond finally “snapped” for him and what it felt like to actually know what he suspected for a long time. They were both crying as they “made love” so this was indication enough, but again, would have liked some more explicit feels.

- This really is a fantasy romance than a romantic fantasy, but I love love love romance and am excited to see where SJM goes with the rest of this series in a new direction.

- The banter in the middle section of the book had me grinning like an idiot at the page, and I LOVED it.

- I wish the relationship between Nesta and Mor had been developed a bit more. Mor said some really cruel things to Nesta at the start of the book about her reminding her of her family, which she most certainly is not. Mor should be able to see the wounded animal that Nesta is at that point. Later in the book Mor teaches Nesta the traditional fae dances, but it’s all off the page. I would have liked to see this dynamic.

- I felt some of the characters were written a little thinly. I’ve seen some people complaining about Gwyn and while I enjoyed her presence she didn’t really “click” for me until the second half of the book. Honestly I thought she was going to die in that last scene in the Rite but alas.

- Merrill is Miranda Priestly though, can we all agree on that?

- Eris at one point makes a comment about the Illyrian’s not being brave enough to look under Ramiel to see whether it has tunnels carved under it. I really thought that this was going to come back and have something to do with how Nesta and the other’s got through the Rite, but that never came. I wonder if it is a set up for another book.

- Baltasar anyone?

- Overall, I’m not sure I love the whole Nesta becoming a Warrior and trying to build a new legion amongst the priestesses (I think I would have preferred it if she tried amongst the Illyrian women) but if it’s just a “hell yeah we’re badass strong women” than actually fighting in another war then I’m into it.

- That heartbreaking scene with Feyre almost dying was beautiful. Again, wish it had been longer and more suspenseful. I still cried.

- The ending was really beautiful, but I think I would have enjoyed an on the page reconnection of the sisters and each saying things to each other. Presumably we just have to take Nesta’s “I love you” to Feyre as proof of this happening.

- Rhys only really coming around to Nesta after she saved his mate and son’s lives. Not the best, but unsurprising. I thought that Nesta was going to be the one to save them as soon as that plot point was introduced. Still enjoyed it though.

- And her altering her pelvis so she can have Cassian’s babies one day…what better way could she tell him that she loved him? (Certainly not with a stale biscuit). The question remains, did she afford Elain with the same curtesy knowing how Azriel feels about Lucien. Heck, how Elain feels about Lucien.

- I would have loved a little more internal anguish were they both realise that they love the other and are too afraid to tell the other. This does happen, but it’s not as explicitly on the page as I would have liked.

- The ending, they’re getting mated, in front of all of their friends and family. It’s the most beautiful sentiment and they both deserve to stand up and declare the love, that they kept hidden for so long, to everyone.

Wow, I didn’t realise that I had so many opinions on ACOSF but apparently I do (thanks for reading this far, if you have!)

Overall, I really, really, enjoyed ACOSF. I love Nesta and Cassian so much and it was so great to finally read their story. The book wasn’t as crushingly “this is perfection” as I felt about ACOMAF but it was still pretty fantastic.

Right now, I’m heading off to begin my reread of ACOSF (every SJM book has to be read twice as soon as it comes out - this book series brings true comfort to my soul and makes me sob like a baby and I LOVE it). I’ll be back on Tumblr (properly) from this weekend and CANNOT WAIT to see all of the takes, memes, fan art, etc about this book. Feel free to slide into my DMs or Asks if you want to chat.

Speak soon,

Red

#acosf #book review

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fuckingrealityshifting · 4 years

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1// hi there, before you get too far, I want to say that I am trying to say this with all the kindness in my heart, and that I do, truly care for yall, and this is why im typing this now. I stumbled across your blog via your 'shifting terms' post, and I explored the idea of shifting and the shiftblr community a bit. I read all of your sources (although I don’t really believe most of them are credible enough) ((it could just be the uni student in me tho)) and I can't help but worry for you and

2// the shifting community. As I understand, most of you are still quite young, and while I haven’t tried to shift (I have a deep paranoia of developing a psychotic disorder), I fear that this practice could affect the young minds in this community in an unprecedented way. I am /not/ saying that any of you are delusional, im not saying its fake, im not saying i dont believe you. But many of you have mentioned how shifting is a) not dangerous and b) similar to astral projecting.

3// This is where I begin to worry, in my understanding, astral projecting is VERY dangerous, so if what you are doing is similar i dont believe it is a good idea. Especially for young people. Adolescent brains are very prone to mental illness, and I fear by placing yourselves in this situation you could eventually damage your mind. I dont mean to preach or anything, i just know a lot of you are young and i think you should be aware of the dangers of what you are doing,

4// because it could affect you in the long run. But stay safe, watch over each other and i wish yall the best. (ps. im sorry this was long)

/////end of ask

Okay so I just wanted to first say it would be okay if you didn’t believe or thought I was mentally ill and stated such! An ask like this is useful because it can start an actual conversation; I have concerns besides just disbelief to go off. Astral projection, being young, etc. I thank you for that and for leaving asks.

I don’t want people to think it’s not okay to be open about not believing. I know with the whole rating stuff rather than responding to comments it might seem like that, but I’m just going to brush off what doesn’t have a purpose other than bringing people down because there’s no point in repeating myself.

If it’s clearly meant to be sarcastic or has a punchline or comment for the sake of being rude or feeling like you’re superior (“get a hobby”) then I’m just not gonna humor you. I’m not intending to shut down all concerns at all.

About the sources—yeah, I do agree, a lot of the sources aren’t very credible, I totally acknowledge that. I also acknowledge even if they were all done by very credible sources the findings wouldn’t be absolutely decisive.

That’s kind of the fault of a lack of experimentation in scientific/professional spaces regarding anything spiritual and just the nature of spirituality itself. At the end of the day it’s mainly the suggestion of the findings that are important to spiritual people looking for evidence. I’m not sure if I worded that all coherently lol

I’m gonna answer these two points in reverse

Shifting is b.) similar to astral projection

So when I say similar to astral projection, I mean mainly in the fact you are perceiving stuff outside of your body and projecting. It’s a similar concept, and a bit of a similar practice, but not entirely.

With shifting, you are projecting your consciousness, and with astral projection, you are projecting your astral self/soul.

(I haven’t researched as much into the specifics of astral projection as I have for shifting so feel free to correct me! My understanding of astral projection is that your soul/astral self projects from your body to wander the astral realm.)

I’m gonna copy and paste some stuff I said in a dm message to someone who had a similar concern.

When a person shifts, their soul remains in their body. Your consciousness/awareness of reality is what is in another universe. When a person asteral projects, their soul leaves their body and can travel different realms of the universe.

When a person astral projects, they can come across spirits, deities, and harmful entities. They can take damage to the soul. They can change their astral form. Astral projection is dangerous. It is highly recommended not to astral project without protection.

When a person shifts, they are in a normal reality and do not need protection. Protection doesn’t hurt, as it doesn’t hurt to have protection in this reality, but its not necessary. (Precautions should always be taken.)

If they die in their desired reality, their soul is fine so they just come back. There is no danger of death. Your consciousness or alternate self (“clone”) can also go about your day while you are shifted which I have never heard about for astral projection.

The differences between your spirit projecting outside of your body and your consciousness projecting into another reality is why shifting is generally regarded as safer and as needing less precaution.

shifting is a. not dangerous

Well, not inherently. But like most anything it can be used dangerously. Some of the precautions that should be taken are:

•educating yourself properly before shifting

•grounding yourself (an ungrounded shifter can have issues)

•making sure you are not depending on shifting for anything or using it as unhealthy escapism

•understanding spirituality concepts even if you’re not practicing

I have a Staying Safe While Shifting post that has been in my drafts forever because I want to finish my mental health series to link it in the post, but I’ve been procrastinating finishing the mental health series because of the ADHD and shifting topic, which I believe I have.

We do have a majority of young people on the community—middle to older teens, I think. Most adults interested in this sort of thing participate under Quantum Jumping, a term that’s been around longer, which seems more online forum based.

Overall, yes. Shifting when exposed to the wrong people can absolutely harm mental health. I think we’re seeing it on TikTok. I just don’t have the power to make sure only people who can mentally take it see it. I just have to do my best to educate people on how reality shifting works so delusions or misunderstandings are hopefully easier to spot.

I absolutely thank you for the thoughtful message and if I brought up more concerns let me know.

#shifting #shiftblr #reality shifting #spirituality #desired reality #dr #shiftblrs #cr #shifting community #shiftblr discussion #shifting disbelief #not really but just in case #unreality #long post

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witchyintention · 4 years

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Impractical Witchcraft

Impractical witchcraft, if I've said it once I've said it before. Witchcraft is absolutely nothing like we see on TV. And like all my posts thus far, I find myself being asked a bunch of things from people all over the world. This time though it's been question regarding transgendered individuals. I have been asked things such as can you do a spell to change me to look like a man, can you make my family support my change (more on the financial spectrum but I've gotten both), and my personal favorite a breast reduction.

I often answer their request with a question myself. If magic could do that don't you think I'd be making some serious bank and wouldn't plastic surgery be non existent? Not to mention people would accept witches. I imagine not too many people want to be cut open to fix whatever it is they want to be fixed.

Ultimately magic like anything else has its limitations. So what can't magic do? To put it simply unrealistic things, such as but not limited to making anything happen with a snap of your fingers. I mean sure you could stop the growth of yourself but you can't reverse what has already grown. Unless we are talking about weight loss. But don't expect to just sit back and drop weight as you lounge on your couch eating potato chips. You still have to put for the effort.

Now you are probably also wondering how it can help trans people then. And though I am specifically covering transgender individuals, does not mean these things can't apply to everyone else as well. I simply chose them for the sake of the many who have been coming to me in desperation to be who they were really meant to be. Also to show that this blog, just like myself, is inclusive of everyone no matter the things that make you different.

Confidence. Witchcraft can make you confident. This seems to be a thing many people struggle with. Just because they don't look like those celebrities on tv showing off their money. There is a fine line between cockiness and confidence. Confidence is the result of your shadow work. You have embraced yourself for who you are, flaws and all. And have a sense of pride for the things that make you uniquely you.

Cockiness on the other hand is more on par with pretty much saying "People will love me" rather than "I am okay if people don't like me." I understand everyone wants to be acknowledged. I mean I do too. Sitting here taking the time to write this all out with the mindset of someone being grateful for my efforts, for people to read and react to it. So I am fully aware of the fact. I am confident someone out on the vast internet will find it useful and that is my sense of seeking acknowledgement.

I feel like it's also a great time to mention that you shouldn't use magic to force people against their wills. That's wrong. That is no different then slavery and your taking away basic human rights. I've had a few people finding their ways into my DM's asking me about doing a spell to make people except them and to that I respond with a who the fuck cares if they do or don't. Okay. I know. I am fully aware we tend to care too much about what others think and honestly unless you ask them, what they think in regards to you, you should not give them the time of day.

You be you. It matters not what that random person you have never met thinks. And if those closest to you can't accept you for you, well know that I will, quirky flaws and all. Though I am a person who has never really cared what others think it doesn't mean I want to see nasty comments. I want to support those who have nowhere to turn but I will not use magic to force another against their will.

If you are a trans person or anything else and you feel outcasted it's fine to seek help. Magic can help you feel confident in yourself. You can do a spell for self love, and help you feel good about yourself. Now I am not a trans person so I can't say what all magic can do to help. However when I started writing this several months ago I reached out to an androgynous witch who found confidence and self love through witch craft. They (Aédan Mercury Hybrid) inspired me to write this. I was initially supposed to do an interview with them and you know one of these days I will but for now here is what I've got for you. I hope reading this inspires you as much as it did me when when I was writting it.

Blessed Be Beautiful Witches 💜

✩ Don't Steal Other Peoples Work ✩

Written By:

Reine Alicis

Date:

July 15, 2020

#witchblr #witchcraft #witch community #witches #wicca #witchythings #healing energy #witchcraft info #witchcraft 101 #witchcraft blog #real witchcraft #magick

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lighdramons · 3 years

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Hi I'm back. I promised awhile ago I’d tell the story of the fucked up digi.mon cult, so I figured that’s a great start for getting back onto this hellsite.

If the read more works, everything will be below the cut and it is a mess. Just a few things before the cut though:

General TW as I will be bringing up some of the bad experiences I had as well as talking about mental illness.

I will not be using names of sites, usernames, etc. I will not answer on specific users either. I’m sure these sites are still operating somewhere privately and back in the day, some of these people were big in the Digi.mon community outside of the sites as well.

If any of the people involved see this, no ill wishes towards you guys, just my take on things.

I quit these sites back in early 2015. I do not know what happened after I quit. I am only still in contact with a few individuals who either quit around the same time as me or long before.

As a general courtesy, some of these sites still exist. Please do not go harass them. A lot of the public sites are just teens trying to figure out themselves.

If you have questions or comments after reading this whole thing, I’m happy to answer any either publicly or privately. And yes, you can reblog this post.

We need to jump back to 2007 to begin with. I was a middle schooler getting back into Digi.mon because I walked into Gamestop and Digi.mon was sitting in the new releases. And I had access to the internet. I did binge S1-5 with subs and watching reruns of the dub on Toon Disney. I spent some time on the big fansite. Great site, just bad experience at the time because I was a teen and probably lied about my age. I didn’t feel like that was the community for me. I do check it every day now for news, just never made a new account cause I don’t even remember what I used back in the day.

By end of 2008/beginning of 2009 I began looking for other sites, stumbled across the digiclipse stuff on the bad encyclopedia site, looked into it, thought it was neat, moved on. Stuck with the big site for now because the only other sites I found were RP sites and not my thing at the time. Got hit hard with depression at the start of 10th grade (late 2010) and found my way back onto the digiclipse stuff. Didn’t really believe most of it, but thought the idea of creating AI Digi.mon was neat. Joined the smaller of the two sites because it felt friendlier and most users seemed my age.

For people who do not know, digiclipse is the act of going outside and holding the toys up hoping to get teleported. Most people by the time I joined thought the people who did this were crazy. Some people liked to do it for the lolz though.

Anyways, most of what happened on the sites was just talking and hanging out in chat rooms about life and other things. It was pretty chill. I can’t speak for everyone on the sites, but for me it was an escapism kind of thing. I was depressed and hated life so pretending that a magical adventure was a possibility gave me some hope. But honestly, got a group of people who were cool to talk with for the most part. There was one older female in her mid 20s that would come in the chat drunk and sexually harass the other female users and tell all the male they should die and are worthless. Nothing was ever done about her. And honestly it was weird having her there when most of the other people on the site were under 18. That was initially my only bad experience on the sites.

At some point during 2011, there were three individuals who claimed to see and speak with their digi.mon partners. And that they could read your aura and tell you exactly your digi.mon partner. And everyone believed this shit, mostly because two of them were prominent members and how could they lie. The process was simple, you would DM them either a creative piece you’ve done (art, writing, etc) or send a photo of yourself and they’d come back in a few days and tell you who your partner was. There was only ever one individual this method of tracking did not work on and that is yours truly. Oh and at the time it hit hard because I had started falling down the rabbit hole. This is the beginning of the cult-ish stuff.

Then the Ouija board happened. I have no issues with what happened during the fucking around with said Ouija board, I have issues with everything that spiraled out of control after. They fucked around with it confirming people’s partners that the others had “found”. And eventually they asked about mine. And then it was basically said, “oh we can’t tell you the results”. I was eventually added to this secret site of “The Chosen”. And basically told, “oh your partner is the offspring/creation of THE BIG BAD” and there were all sorts of debates on what to do about it. I literally thought I was getting punked at first and these people are clearly taking this whole thing too far. No, these people all believed this. Oh and the best part, most of the people involved in this “chosen” group were in their mid 20s. Me being a depressed as fuck 16yo that just wanted something exciting in life ended up eating all this up. I felt special and chosen. I look back on it now and I’m like what a fucking idiot.

We were all taught from the three who could do the stuff I explained earlier how we can also learn to bond and communicate and see our partner. I had absolutely no progress. Eventually this stuff led to everyone in this “chosen” group getting a “special guardian spirit”. Again, I made no progress on this. And to the point where they made me feel special again, I was the only person who had the wrong “guardian spirit” and they eventually found my “real one”, more on this later.

These discussions moved from a forum site to a private skype chat room, and then further smaller private chat rooms. The movement to skype is where I started having some bad experiences. I gave a few of my “close” friends on the site my phone number, soon everyone had my number. And this happened to multiple people over the years. My own stupidity at the time.

This stuff continued as I finished high school. At the time, I still managed to maintain my social life with school friends, keep up my grades, etc. Got into college with a good scholarship in my dream field. And then I started to go downhill once I got to school. The longer this stuff went on, the more you were expected to be involved. Including being on skype calls all night. It slowly began consuming my life. I ended up not only with depression, but ending up with an ED that was tied to anxiety so I’d go days without eating. I was seeing things and hearing voices, which was highly encouraged because it meant things were working. I literally could not tell the difference of when I was asleep or awake. I honestly do not remember the majority of my freshman year of college. I had no real friends and was just barely scraping by grade-wise. And well, the academic year almost ended with me hanging from a pipe in my dorm.

I ended up running the site I started on as an admin after the original admin team left. And it was expected you do not mention any of the “secret” stuff on the main site. Over the years I know it became clear to the users not included that there were secrets in the background. And those who knew stuff would actively fuck with these users. And if I haven’t made it clear yet, there was a hierarchy to this whole secret group. And it was the original three who were mentioned at the beginning that were on top. And what they said was gospel. Whatever they claimed is what happened and whatever rules they had were the rules. But of course certain people could break the rules and get away with it.

This next part happened at some point during my freshman year and will be relevant again later on. This is the biggest TW section so skip if you have to. I had a user dox me. He had my home address and threatened to post it. He had sent it privately to a few other users as well that alerted me of this. His reasoning? I would not date him or say I loved him. He told me that he would come to my house, murder me, r*pe my dead body, because he is the only one who gets to have me. Another user got involved and called the cops. I do not know if anything ever came of this because I never spoke to anyone about it. I at the time had admin privileges on one of the sites so I banned him and blocked his IP and I blocked him on anything I could. And I continued doing this over the years. I was told I was a bad person for doing this because I did not understand him. This lead to a lot of the things in the above paragraph getting worse.

As this all continued, there were battles and casualties and everyone ended up with like 20 partners. And if you haven’t noticed I’ve stopped using the term digi.mon entirely in the past few paragraphs. That’s because oh they weren’t digi.mon. They were spirits/dimensional beings that took on a form we were comfortable with and we formed a bond with. And I kept going along with all of this because I was in too deep at this point. And obviously yes, this all made sense. So at some point during this time, my “spirit” went to sleep and a new one “awakened”. And I of course still went along with all this. The BIG BAD kept mutating into stronger forms and blah blah blah.

During my fall semester sophomore year, I joined theatre at my college and did tech. Honestly, one of the reasons I was able to begin breaking away from this. I started to get an actual friend group and have less time for these sites. But there was always a pull of “you have to be here”. You were expected to be on skype calls and/or active in chat.

Well, that all changed at the start of 2015. They wanted a deletion of all the other sites and they would have one site united under one belief system. I was not a huge fan of this and made this known, but also offered to help in the coding as that was a skill I had that no one else really had. It got out around that I was a cunt and a power hungry bitch and blah blah blah. If it was just that, I would probably not have left. No no no, I was accused of lying about the shit that that user said and did to me. Because he is such a nice guy that could never do that type of stuff. And unless I provided the receipts I was clearly an attention seeking liar that wanted to ruin his life. That was the straw. I fucking blacked out in a rage and attempted to delete some of the different websites, I blasted some of these people on their real facebooks, and then I deleted all of my accounts and blocked everyone and blocked their numbers.

After that, I started talking with other people that quit. I started enjoying my college life. And I tried to act like none of that stuff had happened. I distanced myself from those individuals that were active in the Digi.mon community. I stopped hearing the voices and seeing things. I started going to therapy. My road hasn’t been perfect, but I’ve come a long way since I got out of this stuff. Honestly going to meet up with one old member after covid is all clear cause we’ve known each other for over a decade now and its about time we finally meet in person.

So yeah, that’s my story. I know I jumped around a bit and thoughts might not be too clear, but I wanted to share the fucked up things that happen in the background of the digi.mon community. Did I have good times? Hell yeah. The Olive Garden incident still to this day is iconic. We played d&d oneshots sometimes. We had memes. We all watched xros and hunters together live. And I still have some good friends out of this. The most fascinating thing out of all of this is everyone from the community that I still am either in contact with or see them via social media had admitted over the years to suffer from some kind of mental illness and has come out as part of the LGBTQA+ community. My own conclusion is a lot of us got sucked in due to depression/escapism and just a feeling of not belonging. And being around people of similar age with similar interests just made things more bearable at times. It also made a lot of us very vulnerable to the manipulation that took place, whether it was intentional or just one big group delusion created by multiple mentally ill people. I call it a cult, but I'm sure people will disagree with me. Whatever you want to call it, it wasn't good for my mental health in the long run.

If this shit is still going on, I hope people aren’t letting it consume their lives. And I just wish the best for everyone even if some of the shit hurt me.

As I said up top, if you want me to elaborate on anything or have questions, I’m good with talking about stuff. If you know me IRL and are reading this and are like "RACHEL WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK" I owe you a drink and explanation. And of course it Is okay to reblog. This is one hell of a comeback post on this site, am I right?

#ray's rants #im back on this hellsite and im here to share bullshit

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simp-for-mha-men · 4 years

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𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕥𝕦𝕤: 𝕠𝕟𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕖 (𝕕𝕖𝕟𝕜𝕚 𝕜𝕒𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕒𝕣𝕚 𝕩 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣)

A/N: My first piece of writing! I hope that all of you enjoy it. I LOVE IT! (also a Denki stan, so ya know) I totally believe Denki is the kinda person to create friends only AND in person. Without further ado, here ya go.

Genre: fluffy fluff with mutual pining 💞

Word count: 2.3k

♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥

itzElectric has joined the chat

itzElectric: HEAR YE! HEAR YE! I SUMMON MY COMPANION @IceStorm TO CURE MY BOREDOM!

Denki Kaminari was once again on his phone, searching for the person who he began talking to only months ago in a future-hero chatroom. He remembered he slid into IceStorm’s DMs with a cheesy pick-up line: Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Enough to break the ice. A classic one-liner he hoped wouldn’t scare the person on the other side of the screen away.

IceStorm ended up responding to the DM almost immediately, commenting on how the Titanic wouldn’t appreciate that opener. Denki knew from that simple reply that he and IceStorm were going to get along just fine.

IceStorm, whose name he later found out was (y/n), was an all around perfect human being. Seriously, they were. Denki swore to the Bakusquad that if you looked up the definition of perfect in the dictionary, (y/n)’s tag would be next to it.

Their quirk related to the online name they chose for themselves. The fact that they could not only produce ice from their body but also turn any bodies of water, like clouds or lakes, into ice was fascinating to the electric boy. He, in turn, shared his quirk with (y/n). He even sent a video of himself in full “Dumb Denki” mode, to which he received an audio clip of them laughing hysterically as a reply.

The two online friends shared everything with each other. When (y/n) broke up with their first boyfriend, they talked with Denki the entire night over voice chat. When Denki started doubting himself and his placement in UA’s hero course, the future ice hero immediately gave him a million reasons on why he was going to become a great hero.

It took Chargebolt only 3 months to realize that he had developed feelings for his online friend after sending that fateful DM. He couldn’t tell (y/n) though. No way. If he did, they would probably block him, maybe even delete their account and create a new one just to get away from him for good.

How did this happen you might ask? Well, it began when (y/n) and Denki found out they were the same age. They also both wanted to become pro-heroes, obviously. Plus, all of their interests lined up with each other. It was as if fate pulled them both together through an internet connection and an obsession with Tik Tok memes.

Snapping out of his trance, Denki realized he had been zoning out for a few minutes to recount how he met his current crush. He was so head-over-heels for a person he had only ever heard and not seen that he didn’t even check if IceStorm was online.

Doing just what his brain thought of, he clicked IceStorm’s profile in his friends list and saw what he wished to see the most. Next to a green dot read the words Status: Online, making Denki’s heart rate speed up just a bit.

Instead of waiting for more time to pass, and considering it was almost 2 AM on a Friday night, he DMed the ice maker.

itzElectric: hey.....you lowkey left me hangin in the main chat 😔

He hoped, prayed, and wished that (y/n) would respond. He wanted his partner in crime. His meme expert. His muse. He wanted another audio clip of them singing songs horribly off-key or laughing at another ridiculously stupid Tik Tok. He wanted his heart to flutter in his chest just a bit more. He wanted to feel them in person. He wanted...no, needed to video chat with (y/n).

They had known each other for a total of 8 months, and graduation was coming up for the both of them. If he could video chat with (y/n), maybe he could work up the courage and ask to meet them at the café near U.A. It had the best pastries, something that he knew they would love.

itzElectric: something up? you know you can tell me anything

Very rarely did it take you more than a couple of seconds to respond to the blonde. It worried him. What if something had happened? What if you were doubting yourself? What if you had gotten injured? What if you were--

Suddenly, his phone vibrated. He never had picked it up faster in his life. As he looked down at the message he had just sent, he felt his face heat up slightly when he read your response.

IceStorm: nah nothing’s wrong. was someone worried about me? lol 🥴

He was so happy you couldn’t see his blushing face. However, little did he know the reason you didn’t meet him in the chat room was because you were thinking about what to say. Also, you were blushing as well.

Going to Shiketsu was a big deal, and you never wanted to get distracted. When you met itzElectric online, everything changed. You began developing feelings. It was an issue, but it was a very, very good issue. You had never seen his face. All you wanted to do was video chat with him. If you could video chat with Denki, maybe you could work up the courage and ask to meet him at the café near U.A. It had the best frappes, something that you knew he would love.

You felt your heart rate pick up when Denki responded to your previous message.

itzElectric: obviously. if you died or something, who would make me feel better about myself? 👉🏻👈🏻🥺

Denki began questioning his latest reply. It sounded clingy, he thought. He might as well have just dug his own grave. Who would say something like that?

IceStorm: awwww is my bb giving me a compliment 💘

Your heart soared with emotion. This man, separated by a screen, was your world. You could never have him, though. If you did, he would get freaked out. Besides, you knew he was a flirt with how many pick-up lines he got your opinion on.

itzElectric: well.....since your online, i wanted to ask you something kinda important

Denki knew he shouldn’t be typing anything to them. He knew that this could make or break their entire relationship. In a couple minutes, he might be blasting The One That Got Away by Katy Perry and crying. Despite this, he waited for (y/n)’s reply.

IceStorm: sure. what’s up?

itzElectric: i feel like we have a pretty strong connection....so can we maybe see each other

You might as well have gone into cardiac arrest. This man, the man you’ve had a crush for 4 months, just asked you to meet him. Or was it a video chat request? Maybe just pictures? You needed clarification before you freaked out even more.

IceStorm: what do you mean? like in person or....?

Denki froze. In person? YOU wanted to meet HIM in person? That did not catch him off guard. No, totally not. It punched, kicked, and threw him off guard. That wasn’t suppose to happen. He wanted to video chat then meet up with you. Could this happen out of order?

IceStorm: yo....pika? gonna answer me?

The electric boy typed before his brain could tell him to stop what he was doing.

itzElectric: can you video chat right now?

He wanted exactly what you wanted. The months of banter over chat and stupid voice memos led up to this, but you couldn’t believe it. The two of you could never be together. Denki had to have a girlfriend or boyfriend. There’s no way a catch like him would still be single. Still, you typed your response out immediately.

IceStorm: yes

Your phone began vibrating profusely due to the incoming call. In the moment, you forgot to turn on any lights. Leaping out of your bed, you scrambled to turn on the lamp that was on your desk. You then turned on the one next to the bed. Then, you did the unthinkable: you answered the call.

When the phone stopped ringing, Denki saw you. Oh my All Might.....why didn’t he do this sooner? He was floored by your looks. You were even better than perfect. Your face held a soft expression that made him turn almost as red as a tomato. Your hair complemented the irises of your eyes beautifully. It was as if you weren’t even human. You were just an angel visiting him for a brief moment.

You were seeing him in the same light. His blonde hair and bright yellow eyes made a fire ignite in your heart. He held a goofy grin, one you had imagined many nights before falling asleep. However, you were very far off. His entire persona was fixated in that grin. It was absolutely phenomenal.

“Hi,” you started, letting out a breath you didn’t even realize you were holding.

“Hey,” he responded.

Denki was speechless. You were enamored. This was everything you both wanted.

“So,” you began, “should I call you Denki or itzElectric?”

“Whatever you want.”

Denki wasn’t using his brain anymore. It was as if he short-circuited himself without using his quirk. He was responding to everything you said from his heart. It was all out of love for you.

You giggled a bit, bringing the electricity user back to his senses.

“Why all of this suddenly?” you questioned.

“I wanted to see you.”

“Really?”

“No. I,” Denki paused and inhaled, “I needed to see you. To hear you. To just be with you.”

Your face became flushed as if you had been training for the past 5 hours. The guy you had fallen so hard for needed to see you? He wasn’t acting flirty or overly comedic. He was peaceful and had a glint in his eye. Could it be--?

“D-dude! You can’t just s-say things like that,” you stammered in the best voice possible.

Denki was whipped for you. He glanced at the clock and realized it was 2:18. He needed to be up at 7 for a morning run with Kirishima. He’s run on no sleep before from talking to you all night, but tomorrow was going to be a strenuous training day. He had to get everything off of his chest.

“Listen,” Denki said, “(y/n), I really--”

“N-no. Just w-wait a minute,” you cut in.

Two very different emotions coursed through you both. You felt a sense of purpose, bordering on the edge of extreme shyness. Denki felt nervous, bile already threatening his throat.

“I like you,” you stated.

His eyes grew the size of dinner plates. You did not just say that. He just had too much caffeine before bed. Wait, he didn’t have anything with caffeine before bed.

“L-like as m-more than a friend. You’re really cool, and I want to see you,” you ended.

When you realized he hadn’t said anything, you panicked. Trying to cover up your embarrassment, you just started spewing out word vomit.

“You know what? Forget I said anything. It’s clear that you are totally not ready to talk about that. I mean you probably have someone else in mind, right? I’m not the best looking. My jokes are subpar. I mean, I’m not even that confi--”

“In person?”

“Wait...what?”

“Do you want to see me in person?” Denki asked.

He was floored. The person, who he had feelings for, liked him back. For the first time in his life, the pick-up lines and corny jokes worked. He was truly himself and still got the prize: love.

“Yes,” you replied. “I really, really want to see you in person.”

“You can on one condition.”

You tilted your head, clearly confused by his statement. He chuckled at this and continued talking.

“You have to let me hold your hand.”

“What?”

“I like you too, IceStorm.”

Your online username coming out of his mouth made you smile so wide. It also could’ve been the fact that the guy you fell so hard for reciprocated your feelings.

“Want to meet at the café near your school on Sunday? At around 1?” you blurted, hoping that wouldn’t be too soon for him.

“Absolutely. Speaking of which,” he began, “I need to test out my newest pick-up line.”

You rolled your eyes, faking distaste, but on the inside, you wanted nothing more than to hear it. After all, he felt the same way about you. It was bound to make your heart soar even more now.

“Do you like coffee?” he smirked. “Because I like you a latte.”

You couldn’t help bursting out in laughter and blushing profusely. He, in turn, laughed with you and felt butterflies in his stomach. This continued for a couple of minutes before both of you could catch your breaths and refocus yourselves on the conversation.

You were ecstatic. He was elated. You actually did it. You admitted your feelings to the one guy you never thought you could have. You were everything to him. He would electrocute the whole world just for you to smile if necessary. It was as if fate had finally done its job.

Forgetting about his morning run with Kirishima, Denki started a new conversation about the latest Tik Tok he saw. You replied with your usual sarcasm to which he pretended to be mortified by your opinion.

It went on for hours. The two of you were genuinely happy. Hopefully, Denki would ask you on a date soon. Maybe, you might have to, but who knows.

Suddenly, in the midst of talking about plans after high school, a knock sounded on Denki’s door. He glanced at the clock and realized it was Kirishima.

“Be out in few!” he yelled, jumping out of bed.

He threw his phone down, which still had the call going, and got dressed at lightning speed. Once you had calmed down from laughing at his urgency, he picked up the phone and said something you’ll never forget.

“I’ll see you soon, my wonderful snowflake. Zapping out!”

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thejakeformerlyknownasprince · 5 years

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How To Get Into DnD in 10-ish Easy-ish Steps

Cates here. I just wanted to add my thoughts about joining or starting a DnD game for the first time, as someone who’s been there, done that, and still can’t calculate Rogue Sneak Attack damage to save her life. It can definitely be intimidating entering the world of DnD, but for me the best thing about DnD is running around with a group of people who would literally take a sword in the gut for you. Find a supportive and welcoming group (or start one!) and you’ll be fine.

(Note the “easy-ish” modifier in the title. If you’re a hardcore DnDer who thinks that 5e is a travesty and we all should have stuck to 3.5e, or if you’re the kind of person who gets annoyed about DnD suddenly being “mainstream” and “popular”…chances are some of what I’m about to say will make your eyeballs twitch.)

1. Use other media as a way into understanding DnD. My absolute number one recommendation would be to see or read the play She Kills Monsters by Qui Nguyen. Not only is it a beautiful send-up to nerd culture in general and DnD in particular but because the main character is playing DnD for the first time, it actually provides a decent overview of the mechanics of the game. Another entry point is, of course, Stranger Things—the first season in particular establishes a pretty solid picture of what playing DnD is like.

2. From there, find a podcast, YouTube channel, or similar where a group plays DnD, and watch to get a sense of how things work. Film Reroll is fun but that’s GURPS, a different system than DnD. The Adventure Zone is another good one. By far the most popular is Critical Role. I personally don’t care for Critical Role (put away your torches and stink bombs, please,) but it seems to work for other people.

3. Purchase (or check out from your local library,) the DnD Player’s Guide, 5th Edition. (The most current edition.)

4. Now that you have a sense of how DnD works, find a game. Bug mentioned some good avenues, like comments sections on Podcasts. To that I’d add check out Reddit subs, Facebook groups, and your local game store if you’re lucky enough to have one. Most game stores have resources for finding parties or even host games at the stores themselves.

5. Another option: get together a group of friends, form a party, and stumble your way through one of the early level adventures. If no one wants to DM, do what my second party* does and rotate DMs. We each take turns running an adventure, and while each of us does so our character is off on another quest/on vacation/bringing goblin corpses back to life/etc. Ideally, you’ll have at least one person in the group who has some experience with DnD, but if you don’t…so what? The internet is an endless bounty of information. Some of it is even accurate!

*As opposed to the one I’m in with Bug where I’m the permanent DM.

6. Figure out what you want from a game of DnD. Are you there for the complicated character backstories? Does the complex system(s) of magic fascinate you? Do you want to be like Legolas from LotR, or like River from Firefly, or like the Incredible Hulk? This will help you get a sense of the kind of character you’d like to play. Some people will wildly disagree with me, but here’s my rough-and-tumble ten second mini guide to figuring out your class as a first time player.

Want to be the smooth talker, the one who gets info from the local bartender? Be a bard, or a rogue who leans into Charisma instead of Dexterity.

Want to be really useful/involved in combat situations? Be a barbarian.

Want to use magic? Be a cleric. Your team will thank you. If you want a more “hardcore” magic class, go with sorcerer over warlock or wizard.

Want to come up with unusual solutions to specific problems? Be a druid.

Want to be sneaky? Be a rogue or a ranger.

Want to be some combination of the above/figure it out as you go? Be a fighter. Fighters get overlooked as a class because they seem so generic, but that’s actually the advantage of playing one. It’s so broad you can pretty much do whatever you want with it, taking on just about any of the roles I listed above.

7. Keep in mind that to set your party up for success you’re going to want at least one of each of the following: a healer, a magic user, a ranged (long-distance) fighter, a tank, and a talker. Now, this doesn’t mean you need a party of five, because one character can take on multiple roles. For instance, in the game where I DM, mine and Bug’s brother plays a character who is the party’s main talker and their main magic user. We also have a healer who can be a tank when needed. Basically I just wouldn’t recommend that you have a party consisting of a wizard, a sorcerer, and a warlock, or a fighter, a barbarian, and a monk. Cover different areas of expertise and you’ll have a happy and harmonious party that actually stands a chance of surviving their first combat.

8. Resist the urge to use unusual races or classes for your first game. Trust me when I say that you’ll have so many other things you need to work out, sorting through a class or race that isn’t clearly outlined in 5e is a headache you don’t need. More to the point, it’s a headache that your DM doesn’t need. The amount of work that goes into figuring out how to give an unusual class or race a good combat experience (ie, one that doesn’t kill them and one where they don’t kill all the enemies with a snap of their fingers) is a ton of work…and that’s only one aspect. If you really want to be unique, look at the subclasses and subraces. There are some delightfully strange varieties in there.

9. Similarly, for the love of the Ellimist make sure everyone is clear on the goal of your standard game of DnD: you are a party of adventurers. For the game to work, you need to, for whatever reason, work together. Keeping a whole bunch of secrets from your party, excessively lying to your party, and going against the party’s goals are all ways to make the game waaaaaaayyyyyy less fun for everyone involved. This doesn’t mean that you have to be an open book, but keep in mind that is a COLLABORATIVE, not COMPETITIVE, game. Save the trickery and theft and all for the monsters your party will fight. For instance, in my first game I played a gnome who was disguising himself as a woman because he was on the run from a sorcerer who’d kept him enslaved. He lied about his gender and his name and was vague about his backstory, but he didn’t tell any lies that were aimed at getting a leg up on his party members. Eventually as they bonded he came to trust them and revealed his past, and the party helped him disguise himself as an elderly dwarf so they could take down the sorcerer (it made sense in context : ). Tl;dr: work with your party, not against them.

a. For all my “well, but in my party…” friends, if your game features a bunch of cutthroats all trying to assassinate each other, or if your character was secretly planning on murdering another player’s character for Reasons, that’s fine. All I’m saying is don’t do it in your first game, or you’ll never get off the ground.

10. Within reason, ignore the minutiae. Don’t worry too much about money, food, or how much weight you’re carrying. (At this point I’m assuming some of my hardcore DnDers’ eyes are popping out of their heads.) Again, note that I said within reason: this doesn’t mean that you can take whatever kind of weapon or armor that you want, and you shouldn’t have a never-ending supply of arrows, nor should you be able to purchase that super rare artifact. But if you focus too much on this stuff, you’ll have a hard time getting anyone (yourself included) invested in the game. If this sort of hyper realism appeals to you, add it in after a few sessions. But give yourself a break at the start and don’t roleplay every afternoon tea.

Remember, a good DnD game is a game that you enjoy playing. A good DnD party is one in which the characters AND the players respect each other. Don’t metaphorically or literally split the party, and you’ll be fine.

#dnd #asks #answers #there ain't no party like a dnd party #dungeons and dragons #d&d #rpg #tabletop games #dnd 5e #nothing to do with animorphs #text post #beta takes the box

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xellandria · 3 years

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Zmija Yilan was a temporary character I played towards the end of our Tomb of Annihilation campaign after my boy Alexus got petrified by a beholder somewhere deep in the bowels of the tomb itself. We were able to “salvage” both him and Amara (who had also gotten petrified in the same fight) by shoving them into the Bag of Holding, but short of having the two of us sit on the bench while the remaining two party members waddled back to town, we had to roll some new characters.

I spent most of the week between the petrification and the new characters appearing being mad at myself for not remembering I had Inspiration I could have used to reroll either of my failed dex saves and not being able to do much beyond that, but with less than 72 hours left until she had to debut, I finally pulled an idea out of my butt, ran it by the DM because it involved Shenanigans™, got the OK and started designing her. Thus was born Zmija Yilan, whose appearance was based partly on an old photo that was semi-viral on Tumblr several years prior and partly on Xelloss from Slayers because when I’m in a pinch, that’s always who I fall back on, and have been doing so for like, 20+ years at this point lmao. Personality-wise, there was a post floating around Tumblr that week about proverbs in various languages that, when translated literally or without context, made very little sense so she got a lot of that (and associated misunderstandings based on language mix-ups) mixed in with—again—Xelloss from Slayers, because I am a hack. I would probably never play her again because she was so firmly entrenched in that campaign and also there’s some parts of how I designed/played her that I look back on and am like “ehhh I’m not sure I’m comfortable with the optics of this,” but I enjoyed playing her a lot more than I expected, and I look back on the end of our Tomb campaign very fondly because of it.

I haven’t been able to talk about her in public both for a lack of reason to do so and because I didn’t want to “spoil” my group in case they found my various social media posts, but as it’s nearly a year since she was introduced and nine months since the campaign ended, I’m gonna absolutely wall of text the shit outta this bitch, rofl (that said there’s baby’s first nekkid pin-up under here so assuming Tumblr lets me actually post it, fair warning for that under the cut)

Zmija Yilan - level 8-10 Human* Warlock (Great Old Ones/Pact of the Tome) (usually this is where my D&D character posts put stats but I don’t actually have access to her character sheet anymore, so let’s just pretend she had something ridiculous like maxed Charisma because I remember my spell DC being ridiculously high)

Zmija Yilan is a traveler from the far-off land of Zemlya, and a disciple of Matrymriy, one of the "family" of five gods in the pantheon of that region. Matrymriy came to Zmija in a dream one night and told her to travel across the seas because She had a task for her, and that she would learn more once she reached her destination. She's been traveling around Faerun for seven or so years—reaching one place, being given hints to go to a specific location, and upon reaching it, being told to travel on without seeming to do much more than just Be There. Upon reaching Chult sometime within the last few months, her patron's hints indicated that she should travel to a place called Shilku Bay; she hired a guide (named Salida) and a bodyguard (a Fort Belurian mook) with what little locally-acceptable currency she had; they got separated after being attacked by a band of undead, and after failing to reunite with them, she was wandering around lost, trusting that Matrymriy will guide her where She desires her to go.

Part of her wandering had her end up in the Tomb of the Nine Gods itself, where she encountered our adventuring party (down two player characters) desperately trying to find their way out of the tomb in the hopes of returning to Port Nyanzaru to depetrify their friends. Our barbarian’s player immediately distrusted her because I’d drawn her tabletop token with her back to the camera, which was an awkward feeling almost immediately returned in-game because both the barbarian and paladin aren’t hardcore RPers but they had to carry all the RP weight as they were introduced to this new character and explain that they were there to destroy a lich (both because it was the source of all the bad undead in the area, and because they’d been promised a reward—a motivation Zmija understood, as “a hungry bear will not dance.”) Beyond the usual RP awkwardness there was an additional layer of awkwardness between the characters IC as at the time, Thokk was barely wearing more than a breastplate and loincloth, while Zmija was covered neck-to-ankle despite the heat and humidity of the region. She claimed that in the culture of Zemlya, having strangers see your skin was a mark of great shame and that modesty was of paramount importance, so seeing so much of him was very off-putting and threw her off-balance for much of their initial interactions.

Getting off on the “wrong” foot with the party and pushing as hard as I could into Zmija’s quirks (the weird proverbs, sprinkling in her Zemlyan vocabulary and making a point of her being from Very Far Away with Very Different Customs) meant I went a little too hard on them at the beginning, which is partly what I’d do differently and partly why the whole thing ended up working, so it’s a weird retrospective balance. If my partymates had ever shoved (almost) any of the names or places Zmija mentioned into google, they probably would have twigged to the scheme pretty dang fast.

In reality, Zmija is not a human traveler from Zemlya, because surprise! she's actually Zsaksatyi, a Chultian Yuan-Ti Pureblood under the command of Fenthaza. She worked as a bit of a double agent/interrogator within the Fane prior to her current assignment (hence her spell list's focus on information gathering, silent communication, and manipulation); she's been fleshing out her alternate persona for years and would occasionally pretend to be a captive and be thrown in one of those cells the party was in to get relevant information from the other prisoners, or assist others that were interrogating prisoners by more direct means (via Detect Thoughts). In-universe, the language she pretends to speak is mostly made up, and something she's been working on for years at this point—it's not a fully-fleshed conlang and she only has a couple hundred words and phrases but it's enough to be consistent and believable when she sprinkles it into regular speech. Since there's no real risk of running into anyone else from Zemlya (because it doesn't actually exist), it mostly didn't matter, and since there's actual meaning behind the words she does have, in theory it would have held up to a spell like Comprehend Languages as well. Out of universe, the language she speaks is an amalgamation of my own conlang stuff (which, like the in-universe version, is very limited and not complete) and various words and phrases pulled mostly from real-world Slavic languages (russian, croatian, hungarian, etc) with a little bit of Turkish thrown in when my English-only ear felt that it fit or when I had already used a word and needed another word for the same thing. Zsaksatyi (pronounced dzahk sot-YEE) is the only name/word in the whole mess that doesn’t actually mean something somewhere, and was a combination of syllables from an online Yuan-Ti name generator that I kinda liked together. If she had ever been outed, I would probably have come up with something a little less cumbersome for me and my (almost certainly wholly monolingual) D&D group to say... but she didn’t, so Zsaksatyi it stays!

She very much looks up to Fenthaza and almost idolizes and worships her—if she ever had to choose between Fenthaza or Dendar, things might have gotten a little bit rough for her (possibly no matter which way she ultimately jumped, though I imagine Dendar's vengeance would be more immediate, if Dendar's a hands-on sort of patron). Thankfully (for her), there was very little risk of that given that the party had left Fenthaza on reasonably neutral terms (having already helped her oust Ras Nsi from his position of power in the Fane and the party having essentially marked that dungeon as “cleared”). Fenthaza had sent her to scout the Tomb of the Nine Gods and locate (or steal) an artifact known as the Black Opal Crown, which will allow the Night Mother to emerge into the world. The group actually came across the crown pretty soon after Zmija (and our other new character, a firbolg druid named Mei Ren who replaced our cleric, Amara) joined them, but the party couldn’t figure out how to get it out of the room it was in and Zsaksatyi was content that it would be safe from both our group and other adventurers there while she found her way back to the Fane (though she Sent the location to Fenthaza in case she wasn’t able to make it back). That was actually like, halfway through the session right after she’d been introduced so having her sneak off that fast would have been absolutely wild, so I kept playing her as Zmija and while there were myriad opportunities for her to be discovered—including a hallway where any non-magical non-living thing got evaporated, up to and including clothing—she never was. The fact that the only spells she ever used spell slots on were Hex, Counterspell, and Identify never really got commented upon, because prior to her joining the party we didn’t have a source for any sort of utility magic and we’d been feeling the lack for a while. She was a lot of fun to play just as Zmija once I got the hang of her, but the hidden agenda that only our DM & I knew about was an extra layer of fun, too. It would have been neat to see how the party reacted to a reveal, but unless Jim wants to take us back to Chult to actually deal with the Night Mother’s return (because without having to keep up appearances and alignments, I’m pretty sure I could have gotten that crown out of there even before the weird teleport-defying magic of the Tomb got turned off), her story is over for us—taking her outside of the setting she was designed for would be weird... plus we already have two warlocks (well, one and a half) in a party of four PCs; adding a third would be a little bit bizarre, I think.

Her more Yuan-ti features include scales down her spine and across her shoulderblades, on the backs of her hands, and on her hips and thighs—mostly in reds, oranges, and browns, but as she increases in power and connection with the Night Mother, more of them are darkening to Her blue-black; it started right at that spot between the shoulderblades where you always picture being stabbed in the back, and has expanded from there; I imagine by level 20 all of her scales would be that blue-black and may have encroached further on the more human-y leather bits, probably encroaching on her face at the last, which would make being a spy a lot more difficult (even moreso than wearing as much clothing as she already does) but I guess at level 20, do you really need to be sneaking around pretending to be human?

In direct sunlight or other very bright light, her pupils constrict to slits, which is the real reason for her heavy eye makeup—between the distraction of it and the (somewhat exaggerated) squinting that such light induces, it often goes unnoticed, as it did with her character portrait (although to be fair to my party, Alexus also has slit eyes because that’s one of the traits of elves and half elves in D&D, and also I’m not sure if they ever saw her portrait any larger than 150x150 or whatever Roll20 shows them at). Both her top and bottom canine teeth are sharper, longer, and narrower than is typical for humans, and she is careful not to grin too widely and will cover her mouth when she laughs or yawns, whether she is in disguise or not. That part I’ve never drawn though, so I can’t really point to that as something the party overlooked, heh. In hindsight, I wish I'd given her more/heavier snake features but even the official art for Yuan-Ti player characters are very light on them and getting around the differences between human and yuan-ti racials without tipping off the party was hard enough as it was—I took the 120 feet of magic-ignoring darkvision invocation to disguise the fact that she innately had darkvision, I never used my racial spells and abilities unless I was willing to “use” a spell slot on them and had another plausible way to have obtained them, the one time I got hit with a poison ability (which she was immune to) I spent a lot of time “figuring out the math” on how much HP I had to drop, etc. I also wish I’d given her darker skin, as she is supposed to be Chultian but she is significantly lighter than all the NPCs we came across. Then again, I’m as white as a sheet soaked in bleach so there’s something weird about me RPing folks of colour regardless (especially given her fake backstory, agh agh agh) so yeah. Really enjoyed her, don’t regret her, will not ever play her again rofl

In our very last session of Tomb of Annhiliation, the party—fresh off the victory over the big bad lich whose name I can never spell and his weird world-eating fetus—headed back to Port Nyanzaru via the Aarakocra village of Kir Sabal, which the previous variant of the party (of whom only Thokk remained alive and mobile enough to talk to them) had helped out significantly earlier in the campaign, unlocking a flying ritual that we were like “man we’re not coming back here if we’re gonna use it we gotta do it now” to get us the rest of the way to the port. En route, Zmija tried to leave the group and rolled a secret 15 Stealth roll... contested by 17 and 18 perception rolls from Mei Ren and Thokk, but as she wasn’t carrying much of the party’s stuff and it was the end of the campaign, they kinda just let her give some line about seeing them again in the future maybe, the Mother’s will is unknowable, etc etc. I think if Duf and Kattii didn’t know that I wanted Alexus back as badly as I did and that we were like twenty minutes (real time) away from actually getting him back, they might have considered that more suspicious than they did.

Pronunciations (and translations): (mostly C&Ped from her bio, which is the only part of her character sheet I can still access on Roll20)

Zmija Yilan: zMEE-ah yee-LAHN. Because I'm subtle as hell, that's Croatian/Russian/Ukranian (first name) and Turkish (last name) for "snake/serpent," according to the internet. What do you mean Remus Lupin is a werewolf?!

Matrymriy: mah-tRRuh mRREE (Rs are rolled). Matrymriy is Zmija's claimed patron—one of five major Zemlyashan dieties—but she'll state that she doesn't know the name that she goes by in the local dialect. That's only partly true, of course—мати мрій is Ukranian for "Mother of Dreams" (at least according to google translate), which is close enough to her patron's actual names and titles (Dendar, the Night Mother) that she can get away with it without actually raising suspicions about the true source of her powers. She'll also do that thing where if someone tries to say the name back to her she'll "correct" them by saying it exactly the same four or five times and then "give up" and accept whatever "butchered" version the speaker comes up with, except she'll do it even if they're actually saying it perfectly correctly. She may do this with her own name as well (sorry, Jim. And Duf. And Dustin. And Kattii. And Kattii's coworker, if he ever joins us and I'm still playing this character by then, lmao.) (2021 addition: and literally everyone who has a name that isn’t typically pronounced by us English-only plebians, I am so sorry I’m not better at your language)

Zsaksatyi: dzahk sot-YEE. Zmija's real name, when she isn't pretending to be a human. That doesn't mean anything as far as I know, it was just a combination of some of the syllables the random Yuan-Ti name generator was coming up with that I liked (which is also where "Itszella" was from), lol. I may end up changing it to be less cumbersome at some point, unless it comes up before then and ends up written in stone, but I'm on a bit of a time crunch for the moment.

Zemlya: zem-lyah. If pressed for more detail on where in Zemlya she's from (e.g. by someone pretending to know details about her country), her home town is Fal'shyva (fall-sheh-VAH), southeast of the capital of Hayali (HI-yah-LEE) and just north of the port city of Farazi (fah-ra-DZI), which is where she originally sailed from seven years ago. фальшива земля is Ukranian for "fake land," Hayali is Turkish for "imaginary," and Farazi is Turkish for "hypothetical," lol.

Proverbs & (approximate) Pronounciations: (if I recall correctly, asterisks indicate ones I had used, so I didn’t repeat myself too frequently)

Wziąć się w garść (zvun shih garsch): lit. take the self into the fist (polish), pull yourself together Галопом по Zemlya (gal-OH-pohm poe zem-lyah): lit. galloping across Zemlya (russian), to be hasty/haphazard. * У кого немає собаки, полює з котом (Ooh koe-hoe meh-MIGH-eh soe-BAH-kay, poe-LOO-yay koh-tome): lit. who does not have dog, hunts with cat (ukranian, original proverb is portugese), make do with what you have. Z choinki się urwałaś? (dzi hoink-E she urr-vahl-wash): lit. did you fall from a Candlenights(aka Christmas) tree? (polish), you are obviously not well-informed; are you dumb? * Mi o vuku (MEE oh voo-koo): lit. to talk of the wolf (croatian), speak of the devil. * Thalai muzhuguthal (tha-LIE MOOz-GOO-thal): lit. pour water over someone's head (tamil), cut off a relationship. * Хоть кол на голове теши (coat-coal nah gohl-ehvee teh-SHEE): lit. you can sharpen an axe on this head (russian), a very stubborn person.

Other Languages Are Hard Today, Let’s Just Proverb It In English:

Cat's Forehead (japanese): a tiny space, usually used humbly to refer to owned land. It fell between chairs (swedish): group work that everyone assumed someone else would do, and didn't get done as a result * It gives me a beautiful leg (french): fat lot of good that'll do me Drown the fish (french): avoid a subject by talking about anything and everything else, confuse the issue In a river with piranhas, the alligator swims backstroke (brazil): protect your weaknesses * Accusation always follows the cat (iraqi): it's easy to blame someone who can't defend themselves The honey only sticks to the mustache of he who licked it (arabic): he who smelt it, dealt it * A hungry bear does not dance (greek): the reward must be worth the cost (or at least exist) * The crayfish sides with the crab (korean): people who have a lot in common stay friends * If you can't live longer, live deeper (italian): get the most of your time * A spoon does not know the taste of soup (welsh): intelligence is not wisdom Examine what is said, not who speaks (arab): don't take things at face value * Turn your face to the sun and the shadows will fall behind you (new zealand): have a positive outlook He who does not travel, does not know the value of men (moorish): wide experience is gr8 Do good and throw it in the sea (arab): don't expect anything back from kindness * Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is halved (swedish): friends make things better If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together (african): strength in numbers, speed on your own.

#xellart #dungeons and dragons #original characters #zmija yilan

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floralelu · 4 years

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Le Fleuriste Episode IV:

WARNINGS: NONE :))

Summary: Lucas hangs out with Eliott despite him trying to suppress his feelings, but will his feelings actually be reciprocated?

Word Count: 3,570

[A/N]: Hello!! We are so excited for you to read this chapter!! We just wanted to say that we would love to hear from you so send us questions or comments!! We will be checking our inbox and responding!!

———————————————————————

Lucas woke up the next morning with the sun in his eyes. He knew it was late morning because of the lack of noise in the apartment. All of the guys must’ve gone to work already, but Lucas didn’t mind. It meant he had the morning to himself.

Lucas checked his phone and was greeted with an Instagram notification.

1 Message from plantjunkieeli

Lucas welcomed the surprise message from Eliott. Even though Lucas knew deep down that this boy was probably straight and had other girls in his DM’s, it still thrilled him the fact that Eliott would text him.

plantjunkieeli: hey, lu <3 i’m sorry for what happened last night. i have a surprise for you tonight in paris, i’ll pick you up at 19:00 pm. can’t wait to see you :)

Lucas clutched his phone to his chest. His heart ached for this boy, but he had to realize that with heartache came heartbreak and he was scared to experience the feeling, especially for the first time.

But that didn’t matter. He was hanging out with his friend, Eliott. His friend. That’s it.

lucallemant: sounds good and me too <3

Lucas glanced at the time at the top of his screen. It was already 14:43 am. He only had a little over 4 hours to prepare for his “date”. Lucas slowly got up, still sluggish from the night before, and went out to the balcony.

It was a clear day, the sky was bright blue and people were scattered among the cobblestone streets before him. Lucas enjoyed it when the sun was out like this, he loved feeling the sun’s warmth on his skin.

Lucas wondered what Eliott would surprise him with. In a perfect world, Lucas would be greeted with a bouquet of flowers, it didn’t matter what kind as long as Eliott picked them out. Then Eliott would ask him the words. Will you be my boyfriend?

But Lucas knew that was too much to ask, if only he lived in a fantasy. Lucas knew his expectations couldn’t and would never be met.

Lucas soon left the balcony and went to Yann’s room. Yann and Lucas shared a closet since Yann already had a room to himself and had the space to accommodate Lucas’s wardrobe, which was larger than you might think.

Lucas went to the closet and opened it, he looked at the selections of clothes in front of him. Lucas wanted to wear something nice for Eliott, even though he knew he had no choice with him, he still wanted to look decent for him.

The only thing was that Lucas didn’t have many nice clothes. He had a couple of decent pairs of jeans and a few nicer shirts that he could wear, but the rest of his nice clothes were either too small for him or he sold it so he could have some extra cash on hand. Lucas finally settled on a pair of black jeans and a grey hoodie that had “ROMANCE” written across the chest. Lucas might as well wear his greatest wish across his body for Eliott, maybe he would take the hint then.

Lucas took a shower, washing the night before off of his body. It felt like all of Lucas’s thoughts from the previous night were washing down the drain. When he got out of the shower he felt renewed. He was excited to see Eliott.

Lucas slipped the hoodie over his head and felt something in the front pocket. He reached his hand in and was greeted with a picture. He took the picture out of his pocket and studied it.

Lucas could barely recognize what he was looking at. It was Lucas and his once manageable family. Lucas was a baby in the photo, he was seated in a highchair with a cake on the plastic tray in front of him. The cake was shaped into number 1 and was covered in bright blue frosting. His mom was on the right side of the photo next to Lucas, kissing his cheek. His dad was on the left next to Lucas, he was holding bunny ears behind Lucas’s head.

Lucas remembered grabbing this picture off of the pinboard on the wall above his desk as he was packing all of his things from his old room. He remembered his mom trying to talk him out of leaving. He had already been crashing at the gang’s place for a few days before he returned to his home and gathering his things in order to move in with them permanently

———————————————————————

“Lucas, you don’t have to do this. We’ll make it through this,” Lucas’s mom pleaded. “Please, Lu. You’re not ready to move out.”

“Mom, I am. You know I am. I’ve been ready since you and dad started fighting. I need to be away from it.”

“But what about me, huh?” His mother raised his voice at him. “Imagine what I’m going through! Dealing with my husband leaving and now my son.”

Lucas turned around and placed his hands on his mother’s shoulders.

“Mom, I promise to come to visit and call you as much as I can. But you have to keep in mind that I can’t be here. It’s not good for my mind.”

His mother nodded and hugged him tightly.

Lucas went back to the closet, picture in hand and reached up on the top shelf for his duffle bag. The duffle bag was filled with personal things to Lucas such as books, sheets of music he liked playing on the piano, and other things like his laptop and his chargers. Lucas placed the photo deep at the bottom of the bag, hoping to never see it again.

———————————————————————

“Lucas! You have a date?!” Basile shouted.

“This is great news! I’m tired of seeing you mope around all the time, Lu. Maybe this boy can bring some happiness into your life,” Arthur pointed out.

“It’s not a date. Just two friends hanging out,” Lucas commented.

“Yeah, sure. Friends,” Yann stated, making air quotes.

“With the way that boy flirts, I won’t be surprised if Lucas comes home with a boyfriend tonight,” Arthur remarked.

Eliott would be here any time now. Lucas was terribly nervous. He was terrified of the possibilities of what the night would bring. Could he get back his friend-zoned image and catch Eliott’s eye?

Lucas had his Instagram open, awaiting Eliott’s message of arrival.

plantjunkielei: i’m here :)

“I gotta go,” Lucas said as he placed his phone in his back pocket. “Wish me luck.”

“I bet he won’t be a virgin by the end of the night,” Yann mumbled to Basile and Arthur.

Lucas rolled his eyes and laughed.

Lucas headed down the stairs of the apartment building and headed towards the street. He was met with a truck that had the front of an old Volkswagen bus and had what seemed like a place for storage in the back. It was quite cute, it was the most Eliott vehicle Lucas had ever seen.

Eliott rolled down the window and Lucas’ gaze met Eliott’s eyes.

“You coming?” Eliott asked, flashing his brilliant smile that made Lucas melt.

Lucas nodded his head and hopped into the passenger side of the vehicle.

“For you, good sir,” Eliott laughed and handed Lucas a small bouquet of white daisies. Eliott plucked one of the flowers out of the bouquet. Lucas’ skin sparked at the contact of Eliott’s hand grazing his cheek and his temple as he placed the flower in his hair. “You look absolutely precious,” Eliott said, admiring his handiwork.

Lucas blushed hard and turned away from Eliott until he calmed down.

“So is this the flower that I remind you of?” Lucas asked as they headed down the street.

“I’m not sure yet. I’m testing out some different options,” Eliott said, glancing at Lucas multiple times while he drove on the road. “I still need to need to weigh my options, see what best fits you.” Lucas smiled.

“So where are you taking me in Paris?” Lucas asked as they headed out of Annecy.

“I can’t spoil the surprise,” Eliott remarked. “Besides, what’s the fun in ruining surprises?”

Lucas played with the bouquet of flowers in his lap, playing with their pedals and their leaves. He found that it calmed his nerves.

“Don’t you think I should have a right to know where we’re going?” Lucas asked. “You could still be a murderer, it’s especially suspicious how far away you’re taking me.”

“Oh come on!” Eliott exclaimed. “You still think I’m a murderer?”

“Not exactly,” Lucas said.

“Well, what do you think of me, Lucas?”

“Beautiful, I think you're beautiful,” Lucas wanted to say.

“I think you’re talented. People like you are hard to come by. You run your own flower shop and you’re so young. I could never do that,” Lucas told Eliott. “You impress me.”

Lucas met Eliott’s eyes, only a quick glance before Eliott turned back to the road, but Eliott’s eyes sparkled. Lucas turned away before he could blush any harder.

“And I think you’re beautiful,” Lucas whispered.

“What?” Eliott said.

“Nothing,” Lucas turned back to him. “What do you think of me?”

“I think you’re someone who doesn’t let people in easily. You’re a very reserved and quiet person. You have a lot of underlying issues that you keep hidden,” Eliott continued. “I want to be let in, Lucas.”

Wow. He was reading Lucas like a book. It was true, Lucas didn’t let people in very easily. The gang was a group of people he had grown up with, there were no barriers there, but with others, it was harder. Most of his friends were girls, which Lucas realized he could trust women easier than men. Most of Lucas’ friends knew his dad had left, but they didn’t know why. No one knew the full story because it was too hard to tell and Lucas didn’t want to see the other person’s reaction. Lucas knew he didn’t trust men as easy because of his dad and what he grew up with.

Lucas didn’t understand why Eliott wanted in. Who would want to befriend a guy with abandonment and daddy issues? Could Eliott handle hearing about Lucas’ past?

“I’d like to know more about you first, Eliott,” Lucas said. “I need to know if I can let you in.” Eliott smiled.

“Alright, then. My name is Eliott Demaury. I’m 26 years old. I was born in Paris, France.” Eliott said. “That enough?”

Lucas shook his head.

“Dig deep, tell me something no one else really knows about.”

Eliott sighed.

“Well, I just started back working at Barney’s this year. I used to work there all the time growing up, it was my home. I would burn through gas money just trying to go visit and work there every weekend,” Eliott told Lucas. “I loved seeing visitors come in and their faces light up with smiles just because of some fucking flowers. I mean, who doesn’t love flowers?” Eliott laughed.

“My grandpa and I ran that shop, it was something we were both passionate about,” Eliott said, his eyes lit up talking about it. “I went to my grandpa about everything, girl troubles, family issues, drama with my friends, he was there for everything, Lu. He was one of the only people who listened to me. Then, he got sick. My mom made us move to Annecy so that we could take care of him in his final days.” Eliott was tearing up at the thought. “I couldn’t bear it, seeing him in the hospital bed. I held his hand till his final breath and then I got angry. I was yelling and cursing, nurses eventually pulled me out of the room and calmed me down.

“At his funeral, I didn’t cry. I was tired of crying. I moved back to Paris because I couldn’t bear being in Annecy anymore. I didn’t go to the shop for years after he died, not until this spring. Luckily, Mrs. Lawerence hired my friend Idriss to manage the shop until I felt well enough to return.” Eliott continued. “It’s still hard sometimes, grieving him. But I’m getting better and that’s what matters.”

Lucas nodded. He was shocked to hear such a sad past come from the mouth of this boy who is upbeat. He didn’t know what to think.

He turned to Eliott as Eliott wiped the tears from his eyes. Lucas smiled at him.

“But you made it through it,” Lucas said. “I’m proud of you for that.”

The rest of the drive was filled with jokes and laughter. Even though it was a bit of a drive, Lucas felt like it went by quickly with Eliott. Lucas loved how easy going it was to talk to Eliott and to be around him. He enjoyed his company and Lucas prayed Eliott enjoyed his.

———————————————————————

Paris was a place Lucas had only been a few times, mostly for holidays or weddings. He never got to understand the love and the romance behind the city. He was someone who had been surrounded by the mountains his whole life. To be honest, Lucas was excited for someone to take him back to Paris again. Lucas hoped Eliott had some late-night sightseeing in store.

They pulled into the parking lot of Jardin des Plantes. Lucas had never been to the gardens before in Paris. Lucas hopped out of the car, following Eliott who had a picnic basket and a blanket tucked in his arms. Lucas was excited until he realized that the gardens would be closed.

“Eliott, why are we here? It’s definitely closed.”

Eliott smiled and flashed a set of keys.

“You have keys to this?” Lucas gestured to the massive gates in front of them. “May I ask how you obtained these keys, murderer?”

Eliott laughed.

“Yes, I just killed one of the bodyguards and stole these keys from his dead body.” Lucas rolled his eyes. “Okay, okay, I used to work here when I moved back to Paris after my grandpa died, and when I decided to quit, I may not have returned my set of keys.”

“Eliott!” Lucas shouted. “We could get caught!”

“Shush,” Eliott whispered. “If we keep quiet we’ll be fine.”

Eliott unlocked the gate and let Lucas in first before following him in. Lucas started to relax when he saw that no one was around. Maybe they won’t get caught after all. Eliott locked the gate behind him.

The moon was full and bright enough that it illuminated the ground below them. Eliott led him to a courtyard that had a stone pathway that was outlined with flowers. The courtyard was at the base of a hill, and at the top of the hill was a large grand building that looked like it could be built for French royalty.

As Lucas admired the scenery around him, Eliott was spreading out the blanket and placed the picnic basket on the ground. He opened the basket and fished out a few candles and a box of matches. He lit the candles one by one and placed them around the blanket, illuminating the beautiful spread. Eliott had packed sandwiches, crackers, different kinds of cheeses and fruit. Lucas’ mouth watered at the sight. Finally, Eliott pulled out a bottle of champagne and two glasses.

“What’s that building on the hill?” Lucas asked.

“That’s the Gallery of Evolution. Beautiful, right? It was designed by Louis-Jules André in 1889.” Eliott said, admiring the building with Lucas.

Lucas nodded and turned back to the spread before him.

“Eliott, this looks amazing. Did you make all of this?” Lucas asked.

“Are you kidding?” Eliott laughed. “Mrs. Lawerence made it, she’s good with details like these. After all, I wanted this night to be perfect.”

Lucas smiled and butterflies rose and fluttered in his stomach. He wished he could kiss Eliott now. He wanted to kiss him for eternity.

Eliott popped and poured the champagne into the glasses. They clinked glasses and sipped the champagne.

“Now,” Eliott started, pulling out a joint and lighting it. “Will you let me in?”

Lucas avoided Eliott’s eyes. Lucas didn’t know if he could do it, tell him his sob story of a past. What if Eliott didn’t want someone like Lucas in his life? It seemed like Eliott already had too much on his plate, with his grandfather’s death and taking over the shop again. Lucas sighed and began.

“My dad left my mom and me about a year ago. He would constantly abuse and yell at my mother and me. My mom was always having to hide bruises from her co-workers and family. My mom is schizophrenic, and my dad couldn’t deal with it anymore.” Lucas took another sip of champagne. “I couldn’t deal with it either. That night, I ran away to my friends’ apartment. They took me in with no questions asked and I’m really grateful for that, but sometimes I feel like a burden to them. When I arrived there, all I did was sleep, I couldn’t handle being awake. My mom kept calling me for the few days I was there and I wouldn’t pick up.” Lucas was beginning to cry.

“When I went back home to get my things, my mom begged me to stay with her. I couldn’t do it. I needed to get out, I was too old to live in my mom’s house anyway, you know? We eventually figured things out, I told her I would call her and visit her and I have been. It’s getting better.” Lucas said as a tear fell down his cheek. “But I miss those happier memories with my father. I miss when he was a good dad and didn’t abuse my mom or me. I have fucking abandonment issues and I’m so fucked up because of him.”

“Oh, Lu,” Eliott said as he pulled Lucas in for a hug. “I’m so sorry, you never deserved anything like that.”

Eliott pulled away and placed his hands on Lucas’ cheeks and started into his eyes. Lucas could feel his skin ignite under Eliott’s palms. Eliott took his thumbs and brushed them across Lucas’ cheeks, wiping the tears away.

Lucas calmed down as they dined on the sandwiches and other goods. They chatted a bit here and there but they mostly looked at each other, long glances being shared between them.

“Come with me, I want to show you something,” Eliott said, standing up and offering his hand to Lucas. Lucas nodded and grabbed Eliott’s hand.

Eliott guided Lucas further down a path that branched from the courtyard. It led to a large building made of glass that almost looked like a bubble. Eliott pulled out his set of keys again and unlocked the door.

Lucas was welcomed by a variety of tropical plants and trees, creating a jungle landscape. Lucas could even hear a waterfall running in the background. Little ponds of water covered in lily pads surrounded the path that leads throughout the building, eventually circling out to the entrance again. One of the glass panes was open, displaying the moon brightly in the sky and casting an enchanting glow on the water and the beautiful plants around them. Eliott took Lucas’ hand and led them around the path, even though it was dark, it was obvious Eliott had been here many times. Eliott led them to a spot where the trees and plants weren’t as dense and you could see one of the ponds of water clearly, you could even spot some of the koi fish circling the pond. Eliott turned and grabbed both of Lucas’ hands and stroked his knuckles with his thumbs.

“So, what do you think of me now?” Eliott asked, once again flashing his bright smile.

“I think you’re someone who doesn’t even realize how strong they actually are. You’re talented and independent. You’re someone others can count on, including me. I don’t deserve someone like you. I’m not enough for you.” Lucas felt the same feeling he felt when he last realized he didn’t deserve Eliott.

“You have the same look you did when you left my apartment,” Eliott frowned. “What makes you think you’re not enough for me?”

“Are you kidding?” Lucas started. “I’m falling for a fucking straight guy!”

Lucas tried to pull his hands out Eliott’s grasp, but Eliott tightened his hold.

“Lucas, I love people. I don’t love any specific gender or anything. I love who I love. I like you, Lucas,” Lucas wasn’t looking at Eliott, he couldn’t. Eliott lifted Lucas’ chin in order for him to meet his gaze. “Lu, I really like you, and I mean that.” Eliott readjusted the white daisy in Lucas’ hair. “You’re more than enough for me.”

Eliott wiped a tear that escaped onto Lucas’ cheek. They stared at each other for a minute, their faces inching closer and closer. Lucas could feel Eliott’s breath across his lips. Eliott brought his left hand to hold Lucas’ cheek while the other held Lucas’ hand, and with that Eliott kissed him.

Lucas felt the feeling deep in his belly, a whole migration of butterflies traveling across his body. Lucas got the wish written on his chest in the most beautiful place he’s ever been with anyone.

They were here together, kissing in their bubble, in their world, in their universe.

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