#sujatha

[connan-l]

unafraid

Fandom: Ciconia: When They Cry

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Sujatha/Rukhshana

Summary: Suparna’s training session is cancelled for the day because of a sudden storm, which Sujatha is absolutely not scared of, and that might or might not creates tensions with her girlfriend.

[Femslash February 2023 Day 3: Storm]

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Link on Archive of Our Own

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Notes: Hi here’s your annual Ciconia FemFeb fic from me! Yes you’ll get one until Ryukishi finally decide to release Phase 2. Anyway this is very late but it’s meant to be for Day 3: Storm, from those prompts.

I don’t know why, but at first I didn’t want to write any Sujatha/Rukhshana piece for FemFeb; not because I don’t like them but for some reason I really wanted to write a proper one-shot for them and not something based on a random prompt. But technically speaking they’re still one of the most obvious F/F ships of the VN so far, so I thought they were just the next obvious choice, especially given I’d already done Lingji/Aysha and Valentina/Maricarmen before. So yeah it’s just a small cute fluffy thing without a lot of substance.

Given it’s going to mark the third year since I’ve last read the VN I admit I forgot a lot of stuff about the characters, so I really don’t feel confident in how I characterized them here. Especially Rukhshana. (And I know it *seems* like Phase 1 implied she was a CPP as well like Miyao, but we don’t know much about that yet so I didn’t want to touch on the topic). So I hope they don’t feel too off.

Also, it’s a small detail in the fic but — if you’re like me and haven’t played the game in a while, I feel the need to mention that COU is the one country that has ‘traditional’ families; so I’m assuming Sujatha, Rukhshana and Andry probably have ‘normal’ parents like Lingji & co.

Now on a small caveat I have that made me hesitate while writing this fic: I realized that, obviously we don’t know anything about whether or not Sujatha is religious, but as she is from India and that we’re told the COU is very traditional, IF she is religious then she would probably follow one of the many Hinduism faiths; however, on the other hand, given Rukhshana is from Saudi Arabia and is clearly wearing a hijab, she has to be Muslim. Queerness aside, I know interfaith relationships can be a bit of touchy topic in Islam; some might tolerate it and others do not (one of my non-Muslim cousin dated a Muslim woman for three years, but he had to convert when they got married), and it would be especially so for a Saudi girl given ‘dating’ in the Western sense in general is frowned upon over there. Not sure how things would be in Ciconia’s futuristic, post-World War III universe, but it did seem to imply Saudi Arabia is still very traditional similarly to how it is in our world because of how they mention there were issues with Rukhshana, as a girl, joining the team while there was a boy in it. The VN is very scarce when it comes to giving details about the religious/cultural practices of the characters (hell even the hijabi girls are never actually called ‘Muslims’ in-universe), so I can’t say how pious Rukhshana must be or how important it would be for her to only get together with someone who’s Muslim. So the way I see it in this fic, is that she must probably be respectful of the faith and wouldn’t marry a non-Muslim person usually, but she can give herself some leeway if this is with someone she really loves (and that the other person can potentially convert)? (And well, Muslim communities exists in India too so I suppose you can headcanon Sujatha as such as well). I dunno, maybe I’m just overthinking about it; and of course like I said this is just a short fluff piece and not some exploration of any of these topics anyway lol, but I am not Muslim myself, so I’d understand if any actual Muslim people don’t like it or take issue with this.

All this aside, there’s no spoilers (except for like, the start of Phase 1 I guess) or content warnings except for the inevitable vague mentions of war/child soldiers.

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Sujatha was absolutely not scared.

She had sworn to herself, from a very young age, to never become a person who got scared.

Fear was only meant for the common people. Fear was for normal girls; ones who didn’t have any responsibility, who weren’t soldiers, who weren’t part of the elite of the COU India Aerial Augmented Infantry, leader of Suparna.

Sujatha was anything but a normal girl — had worked very, very hard to not be one; so it was only natural she wouldn’t be scared.

And, most of the time, she did a good job at suppressing the feeling, even when it threatened to bubble up at the surface in the pit of her stomach.

Right now, however, as she heard the news that their training for the day was going to be exceptionally canceled because of some weather turmoils, the wave of anxiety started to overwhelm her in a way she didn’t think she could easily appease.

“What a pain,” Andry declared, letting himself fall all over a nearby couch. “What are we supposed to do now? They warned us at the last minute, so it’s not like we can quickly make other plans.”

Rukhshana made a weak noise of agreement buried under her black hijab. “Maybe… maybe we could play a game together? Until noon, at least…”

“Guess so,” the boy replied, but he didn’t seem very enthusiastic at the prospect. Then again, Andry never seemed very enthusiastic about most things. Everything seemed to pass through him like water; which could be both a relief and frustrating, depending on the situation.

“What do you think, Sujatha?”

“Huh? U-Um…” Sujatha’s eyes darted towards the dark sky, full of threatening gray clouds, trying not to fidget. “S-Sure. Probably.”

At this, both Rukhshana and Andry stared at her as if she was a ghost. They exchanged a brief, skeptical look with each other, before the boy straightened up and arched an eyebrow in Suparna’s leader’s direction.

“You sure?”

Sujatha frowned, feeling as if she was missing something obvious or was left out of an inside joke between her two teammates. Which, unfortunately, happened often.

“Of course I’m sure,” she responded sharply. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“W-Well…” Rukhi bit her lip, looking up at her hesitantly and wriggling her hands like she did whenever she felt unsure of herself. “It’s… not really like you to say something like this…”

“What?”

“Rukhi’s right,” Andry added. “Usually, you would’ve gone all ‘Who have time for games, you lazy scoundrels! If you only think about playing, we’ll end up the weakest of all Gauntlets Knights!’ and then Rukhi would have freaked out mentally over it, or something.”

Sujatha puffed out her chest in an irritated manner and glared at her teammate. “I do not sound like that.”

“But… you are acting weird, aren’t you?”

Rukhshana took a step towards her, and while Sujatha was about to snap back at her that she was imagining things, her mouth shut up instantly the moment she saw her eyes.

The other girl was looking at her with a concerned gaze, the one she took when she was genuinely worried about her; and instantly Sujatha felt herself softening against her will and guilt clogged up her throat. Had she really done that bad of a job to hide her anxiety?

“You’ve… been odd for a while now,” Rukhi continued. “And… it’s been worse since our training was officially canceled… I know you always think training is important, but… Is there… something else?”

Rukhshana stopped right in front of Sujatha, catching her off-guard, and her eyes staring straight into hers instantly pinned her into place. She gently reached out to her, her fingertips cupping her cheek in a tender, intimate gesture; and Sujatha flushed bright red, froze, then panicked.

“Th-There’s nothing else!” She exclaimed, snapping Rukhshana’s hand away and glaring at the other two teenagers. “But you’re right! You’d better find another way to exercise or study if you have nothing else better to do!”

She turned around before almost running away from the room; which still didn’t prevent her from hearing Andry snorting from behind and Rukhshana squeak and grumbling to herself ‘What’s this, she’s the one who said it was okay for us to play!’

Sujatha paid it no mind. She headed to her bedchambers, her face still feeling hot and her chest about to explode because of embarrassment.

She couldn’t believe how… open Rukhshana was with her in public, sometimes. Well, in private as well.

The two of them had been dating for about three months now, but everything still felt very new and surreal to her. No one knew, of course, with the exception of Andry — who had somehow grilled them only a week afterwards — and it did bring in some new challenges to navigate, but so far Sujatha didn’t regret it. She didn’t, but… she had to admit sometimes it felt a bit too… overwhelming, and she wasn’t always sure how to act towards Rukhi as a result (not that she knew how to handle her before, though).

She sighed, closing the door behind her, and let herself fell on her bed.

Rukhshana was going to be so angry for snapping at her like that, she knew. And maybe she deserved it, too. That… hadn’t been really fair from her, after all. She probably should go apologize before things get worse.

She might not look like it, but Rukhi was a pretty grudgeful person; and if she felt wronged, she was absolutely not going to let it slide. She could stop talking to Sujatha for months because of something like this — and the simple idea made Sujatha’s stomach turns into knots, even more so than it already was.

She knew she was the one who had to apologize, and that she had to do it now, but she couldn’t bring herself to get out of her bed.

The gray sky and future storm that loomed over outside seemed to have drained her entire energy. She wasn’t sure how long she stayed like that, but the moment she heard the ripple of the rain on her window’s glass she tensed, then hurriedly buried herself under the blanket, as if this could protect her from the foreseeing tempest.

Sujatha wasn’t scared — she just… didn’t like the rain. And gray skies and clouds. And the dark. And thunders.

And it was absolutely not because she was scared that when she was a child she would stay hidden that way under the blanket back in her hometown in Hanumangarh, and that she would spends hours praying to Indra that the sky could finally light up.

She definitely never came to her parents for comfort, because Sujatha wasn’t destined to be a normal girl and not-normal girls were never scared.

So she also definitely didn’t jump when she heard a timid little knock at her door.

“Uh… S-Sujatha…?”

The voice on the other side was barely audible, especially with her ears camouflaged by the blanket and the heavy sound of the rain that seemed to get more and more violent as the minutes passed by — but of course Sujatha still recognized her.

She’d recognized her girlfriend’s voice everywhere.

“R-Rukhi?”

She distinguished some grumbling from the door, which confirmed her visitor’s identity and at the same time furthered her confusion.

She’d never thought Rukhshana would ever come to see her first. After what had happened earlier, she would’ve been way too mad for that.

“Um… I… I wanted to… uh, check on you…” Rukhi’s voice let out hesitantly. “Can I… come in?”

Sujatha bit her lip. Her heart screamed Yes please, her mind yelled back God no. Sujatha wasn’t scared, but she still refused to let anyone see her… like that.

Even Rukhshana. Maybe especially Rukhshana.

“No,” she finally declared, with a voice a little too shaky.

There was a sigh. And then the door opened anyway.

Sujatha almost jumped off the bed.

“I just said no!”

“I know,” Rukhshana said, glaring at her. “But it was one of your ‘no’ that actually meant ‘yes, please, I need you horribly.’”

Her frame was hallowed of light from the corridor’s luminosity, and Sujatha could see she was still wearing her hijab, albeit another, more casual one along with a long, dark dress.

She clenched her jaw, glared at her girlfriend, flushed, and then threw the blanket over her head yet again. Damn her.

She couldn’t see her, but Sujatha was pretty sure Rukhi rolled her eyes at this. There was a few footsteps sounds, then the mattress moved, tilted under an additional new weight.

“So. Can I stay?”

“A bit too late for that now,” Sujatha mumbled, and the more this situation kept on the more she felt ridiculous. She acted just like a child — completely unbefitting of her.

“Yes.”

And then they fell into an awkward, deep-seated silence for what felt like an eternity.

“Why…” Sujatha started, succumbing to the discomforting tension, before hesitating. “Why are you here, anyway? I thought you wouldn’t…”

“Talk to you for a while? Yes. I didn’t want to. But…” She sighed. “Andry convinced me it was better to not be stubborn, for once.”

That made sense. Andry seemed to be the only other person Rukhshana actually genuinely listened to.

“But he agreed you owe me an apology.”

Well, she supposed that was true. All three of them were on the same page, for once.

“…I’m sorry… for snapping at you… It wasn’t your fault.”

“That’s fine. I forgive you. But… you’ll have to tell me why you did it.” Of course, only silence met her and Rukhi grumbled. “Come on. Why are you acting like this since this morning? What’s going on? You know you can talk to me.”

And Sujatha knew she could. She knew. She just wasn’t…

Well. She wasn’t used to it. Talk, and be open, and be… be scared. That wasn’t a thing she’d been taught. Not even to someone she, apparently, loved.

Sujatha buried her face into her knees, debating what to do with this overflow of contradictory feelings, when it seemed the sky decided to answer for her.

A booming, deafening thunder ripped the room apart, bathing the place in a wide splash of white light. Sujatha then lost all self-control and dignity and actually screamed, her heart stopping and her breath getting caught in her throat. A couple of smaller, other thunders outside left her a trembling, weeping mess under the blanket, rolled into a ball as if she was hoping to disappear.

For a while, the room stayed quiet except for the sound of the rain, but then finally Rukhi raised a small, doubtful voice:

“W-Wait… Could it be… that you’re scared of the thunder?”

Sujatha made no attempt to try to answer this. She didn’t think Rukhi needed and answer, anyway, as even a three years old could have come up with one.

And then the next second she was greeted with loud, unadulterated laughters.

“Oh no! That’s what this was all about! You’re scared of the thunder!”

“D-Don’t laugh! I’m not—”

Sujatha flushed red as she tried to disentangle herself from the blanket to glare at the other girl; but then another thunder resonated behind her, and she shrieked. Rukhshana gave her a smug look, raising an eyebrow.

And stared.

“…F-Fine,” Sujatha admitted, before hiding her head into her knees. “Maybe… Maybe I’m…”

She felt like someone was tearing out her teeth one by one, having to make such a statement. It would have probably hurt less if it had actually been the case.

Vulnerability was the worst, most humiliating thing in the world. She would rather die than appear weak to anyone, least of all Rukhshana.

Least of all Rukhshana, but…

But, maybe, at the same time, if she had to choose just one person who could see this side of her… then Rukhshana would be the one.

“Maybe… I am… a little scared…”

She wasn’t sure what to expect from her teammate, friend, lover. Maybe some teasing mockery and more laughters; that sounded like something Rukhshana would do, because she sure loved to tease her.

Instead, she felt something warm and soft on her back; a hand, she quickly realized, and when she raised her head, she was meet by a pair of soft, kind violet eyes that shined in the dim room.

“You are so ridiculous,” Rukhi said, but there was only fondness in her voice for once. “You know you got me and Andry actually worried here, right? If it was just about something so silly then you could’ve just told us. We’re your comrades.”

Of course she couldn’t have just told them, and of course it wasn’t just something silly; no matter how ‘ridiculous’ it seemed, it was still a weakness to Sujatha, and she could never let any weakness be seen to anyone. Well, except for now, it seemed.

“We’re all afraid of something. What’s the point of being friends if we can’t rely on each other to parry our weaknesses?”

Sujatha didn’t feel like fighting on the topic, so she just looked away, escaping Rukhi’s dark, deep eyes. Maybe the other girl knew it was a pointless argument to have at the moment, because she just shook her head before sitting right next to her girlfriend, their shoulders brushing. She pulled the blanket and covered up both of their heads with it.

When Sujatha looked at Rukhshana again, her face was only inches away from her own, her breath on her lips.

“Don’t be scared,” Rukhi said, smiling. “I’ll stay with you for the entirety of the storm. Okay?”

Rukhi extended her hand toward Sujatha, and while the former muttered a small ‘Idiot,’ she grasped it without a second thought. Rukhshana then leaned in and pressed her lips to hers, giving a gentle, comforting kiss as she was oft to do.

Sujatha let herself melt into her lover’s embrace, hiding her head into the corner of her shoulder, retracting into her arms every time a thunder shattered their peace.

And here, hidden under the blanket, away from the storm and from the whole world with only Rukhshana’s heartbeat and warmth for company, she didn’t feel so scared anymore.

[tamilbooks]

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[hoshizoralone]

ciconia suparna

[indizombie]

For much of its history, BRS had an efficient mechanism to read the mood on the ground:

Telangana's passionately active civil-society movement. KCR grew his understanding of the state over week-long discussions with former Naxal insurgents such as Gade Innaiah. His statehood movement was buoyed by the revolutionary poetry of balladeers, including Gaddar. The focuses of his manifestos were guided by grassroots intellectuals, such as M Kodandaram. But each of these vestiges of the old movement were progressively cut out of the Telangana that KCR and, increasingly, his son were building. In the past five years, the BRS government discredited, charged and arrested such activists in a manner so vengeful it could make the BJP blush.

Sujatha Sivagnanam, ‘Broken Record’, Caravan

[madhansband]

Kaadhal Rojave | Roja | A. R. Rahman | Sujatha | S. P. Balasubrahmanyam | Vairamuthu | Madhansband

For Event Bookings and Enquiries: Call: +919840153443 / +919786766666

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Kindly Support us with your reviews by giving us 5 Star Ratings and by your valuable comments. Madhan's band Google Review Link:

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Original Song Credits:

Lyrics: Vairamuthu Music: A. R. Rahman Movie: Roja Released: 1992 Singers: Sujatha, S. P. Balasubrahmanyam

Song Lryics:

காதல் ரோஜாவே எங்கே நீஎங்கே கண்ணீர் வழியுதடி கண்ணே காதல் ரோஜாவே, எங்கே நீஎங்கே கண்ணீர் வழியுதடி கண்ணே கண்ணுக்குள் நீ தான், கண்ணீரில் நீ தான் கண் மூடி பார்த்தால் நெஞ்சுக்குள் நீதான் என்னானதோ ஏதானதோ சொல் சொல் காதல் ரோஜாவே, எங்கே நீ எங்கே கண்ணீர் வழியுதடி கண்ணே தென்றல் என்னை தீண்டினால் சேலை தீண்டும் ஞாபகம் சின்ன பூக்கள் பார்க்கையில் தேகம் பார்த்த ஞாபகம் வெள்ளி ஓடை பேசினால் சொன்ன வார்த்தை ஞாபகம் மேகம் ரெண்டு சேர்கையில் மோகம் கொண்ட ஞாபகம் வாயில்லாமல் போனால் வார்த்தையில்லை பெண்ணே நீயில்லாமல் போனால் வாழ்க்கையில்லை கண்ணே முள்ளோடு தான் முத்தங்களா சொல் சொல் காதல் ரோஜாவே, எங்கே நீ எங்கே கண்ணீர் வழியுதடி கண்ணே கண்ணுக்குள் நீ தான், கண்ணீரில் நீ தான் கண் மூடி பார்த்தால் நெஞ்சுக்குள் நீதான் என்னானதோ ஏதானதோ சொல் சொல் வீசுகின்ற தென்றலே வேலையில்லை நின்று போ பேசுகின்ற வெண்ணிலா பெண்மையில்லை ஓய்ந்து போ பூ வளர்த்த தோட்டமே கூந்தலில்லை தீர்ந்து போ பூமி பார்க்கும் வானமே புள்ளியாக தேய்ந்து போ பாவையில்லை பாவை, தேவையென்ன தேவை ஜீவன் போன பின்னே சேவை என்ன சேவை முள்ளோடு தான் முத்தங்களா சொல் சொல் காதல் ரோஜாவே, எங்கே நீ எங்கே கண்ணீர் வழியுதடி கண்ணே கண்ணுக்குள் நீ தான், கண்ணீரில் நீ தான் கண் மூடி பார்த்தால் நெஞ்சுக்குள் நீதான் என்னானதோ ஏதானதோ சொல் சொல்

[deepasharma]

Why should one be cautious when engaging CA Sujatha G., CA G Sujatha, CA G Sujatha Raghuraman, CA Sujatha Raghuraman of Sujatha & Associates, Bangalore, who is a member of ICAI athe Karnataka State Chartered accountant Association, Bangalore?

[dreamerslovechaos]

gonna go to watch ponniyin selvan 2 in theatres this weekend so . i am struggling my way through the first novel. why am i so bad at reading tamil it hurts my pride.

[herpsandbirds]

Black-headed Jay or Lanceolated Jay (Garrulus lanceolatus), family Corvidae, order Passeriformes, Sattal, Uttarakhand, India

photograph by Sujatha Murching

[anonbeadraws]

I'm allowed to share this beautiful art for the Motley Coast Adventures, one of the add ons for Confluence! Also very fun fact, you can now get the Lore books only, the Atlas and Sujatha's Journal, full of art and stories! ✨Come get yours here!!✨

[publishinggoblin]

Live now on Backerit, Confluence: The Living Archive is the capstone of the Publishing Goblin journey. In the world of Ajurea, you can play any game you want. Horror, sci fi, fantasy, slice of life, drama, intrigue-- Confluxes bring people, objects, buildings, ideas, technologies, magics from other times present, past, and future, as well as from other worlds entirely.

As a result, you can have swashbuckling adventures, play sports in the Gravity Isles where contestants float through the air, start a crime ring in Motley Coast City, form a union in Crop Circle Junction, or take part in a chili cooking contest!

Pledge for a set of the 6 books that make up this game now and you'll receive the Atlas for Motley Coast, one of three regions on the continent of Wemrel, itself just 1 of 6 continents in Ajurea. The Atlas is an in-world artifact that shows you the world, with mechanics, handwritten marginalia and notes that give story hooks, and so much more!

Sujatha's Journal will be your guide to the lore of the world, all the unique new lineages to meet and play as, and the new forms of magic and technology to be found here!

The core game system for players and Story Leaders alike can be found in the Confluence Guide to the Living Archive!

A list of your unique character traits and abilities can be spotted in the Catalog of Lists!

The Calibration zine will guide you through session 0 to setup a game, as well as help you re-set your game if you need to recheck in on your themes and safety tools.

Then the So You Want to Build It? zine will teach you how to make your own tools for the game system, including new Facets to customize your characters with new mechanics, as well as Focuses to give new area mechanics and NPC abilities!

You can get the whole game in PDFs (well over 1000 pages of material!) for $40, or the whole hardcopy set for $85!

So come visit the Backerkit page today and check out all that Ajurea has to offer, from a huge living world to expansive bonus materials to all the Publishing Goblin projects connecting back to it one way or another. The Alleyman visits here often, as does the Publishing Goblin, and time agents from ZOETROPE, and ghosts from WHAT WE POSSESS, and the Koukyla from NEW AVERNUS.

[tamilbooks]

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[childofthenight2035]

i loved you so much i forgot my mother tongue

// search for my tongue, sujatha bhatt // chennai sentamizh, m kumaran s/o mahalakshmi (2004) // i love you so i made you my mother tongue, sofea t. // i love you so i made you my mother tongue, sofea t. // this is how i forgot my mother tongue, umm nabaat // mother tongue, bring me the horizon // love to lose, @childofthenight2035 // untitled, @wisp-of-thought // kannalane, bombay (1995).

[pangeen]

" Scaly-Breasted Munia " //© Ayush Singh

Music: A.R. Rahman, Unni Menon, Sujatha Mohan - Pudhu Vellai Mazhai

[the-final-sentence]

When Sujatha starts to play, we will close our eyes, and let the vibrations in the air enter us, again.

Deepa Rajagopalan, from "Singing for the Gods"

[seavoice]

Do you have any nonfiction recs? 👀

HELLO VITA hiii how are youuu <333 and yep!!!!

since you haven't asked for a particular genre of non fiction i'll be a little all over the place but if you have some area in particular let me know!!

the emperor of all maladies: a biography of cancer - siddhartha mukherjee. (science) exactly what it says on the tin. i read this probably a little too young under weird circumstances but it was SHOCKINGLY riveting for kid me. absolutely fascinating, and really well written for a book about...well, basically cancer! i don't know how to sell it except to say it still remains one of my most favourite books ever

ants among elephants: an untouchable family and the making of modern india - sujatha gidla. (autobiography | history) it's a biography about a dalit christian family from andhra pradesh and it's super compelling. obviously i can't speak with total authority about what that experienceTM is since it's soooo varied but AS someone from a dalit christian family from andhra pradesh it felt so so true down to minute details. the naxalite movement and its depiction is the part of the book that is more debated in critic circles but even then it is still an absolutely fascinating look into that complex history

curfewed night - basharat peer (memoir). peer is a journalist whose family was personally affected in the 90's during insurgency in indian-administered kashmir. good place to start to learn more about the conflict. it's a short read but super powerful. didn't know haider was partially adapted on this until recently!

a bunch of non-fiction graphic novel recs because i love non fiction graphic novels: alison bechdel's fun home i loved it soo soo so much and it kind of changed me in the last year of school lol, it's about many things but especially about her complicated father. persepolis by marjane satrapi, a wonderfull read on iran and feminism and satrapi herself. palestine by joe sacco which is about palestine through the eyes of joe sacco, a journalist, and gives you a glimpse of palestinian history as well as the conflict and its present day ramifications. munnu by malik sajad! this is also an autibiographical book on kashmir and an excellent importantl read. the author portrays the kashmiri people as the endangered hanguls. the concept was based on art spiegelman's maus which of course if you haven't read is itself an automatic recommendation.

a few non fiction essay collections that live rent free in my brain - arundhati roy's entire oeuvre of course, but especially an algebra of infinite justice (the collection, not just the essay of the same name). the education of a british protected child by chinua achebe is excellent in many brilliant ways, but especially the essays on language and literature are <33