#sufferfest

[gamersagainstthemachine]

i hear sh2 remake is good? i know nothin about silent hill. got my sister into RE and just beat dmc1 with her watching, hoping she starts to like 3 and 4 when i get there. but yeah, vido games! love em

ive been playing these games because i found the ps2 which i thought had died and i also frequent thrift stores and have been able to find these games cheap (not the silent hill games obviously collectors have scalped those) but my friends got me dmc1 because it "seemed like something id like" yeag. it cracks me up especially the devilman references. but it seems like these games are also just popular again with the general person?

i havent played sh2 remake myself yet im busyyy and also tired of people rushing me to play things instead of doing it in my own pace. but ive been following along the release and it has some good things to it like environment details and even more endings. people have always been praising the little things in the writing and art direction which arent in the remake and they havent been replaced with better content so its lesser in this way. absolutely no way replace plauing the original with this one lol

i like games that are like interactive theatre with a great soundtrack and silent hill is often this. there is a lot of silent hill content, from installments that prove games are art to b movies that facilitate stupid cliches and it also encompasses other franchises like forbidden siren which i have played a bit of and team psyskallars fangames which are better silent hill games than some silent hill games and also hit closer for me because they take place in urban scandinavia. You know me its all been indie game supremacy because i didnt want triple A bullshit but ive made friends that have introduced me to the value of Big Gaming because its a part of them and because they are important to our culture and they are creative and its fun and there IS a lot of bullshit done in the name of marketability like blatant sexism and racism which i complained about the other day completely devalues the new dragon age for me because once i start thinking the authors are idiots with no other values than representing a power fantasy it really just feels like a waste of time to visit their work. Not that i dont want a power fantasy but i need it to address what matters to me especially the unattrative parts of life. Silent hill 2 is exactly this its what marias character is all about. i set my standard for video games when i first heard about silent hill 2 and similar games. the thing to like about it is that it is just so honest. its not really about people being horrible and ugly it makes a point about people being multifaceted and realistic and it is a sufferfest sure but its to drive a point home about ultimately love and gotta like media that examines the concept of love. they never try to censor themselves which i like because adults dont need content censored for themes they have specifically sought out depictions of. because it doesnt dumb down or glamourize it is entirely different from other commercial experiences which makes it weird that it is a popular franchise and video game with things like remakes coming out because you just cant treat it like any other consumable product its not anonymous or universal like that which lends itself to waifus and merch. but at the same time its also a video game made for an audience of adult gamers so it was made to create a fanbase around it. the best thing about being a silent hill fan is the gatekeeping and elitism it has resulted in and im serious because they arent games for everyone and it shouldnt be treated like they are. everything in moderation and all and the overexposure and bad retellings completely undermining or missing the sophisticated point is really prevalent. mr ito said it best https://x.com/adsk4/status/1495530138922283008 but seriously i have to even ask silent hill cosplayers and fanartists if theyve even played/seen the games and they often say no. a bit alienating. i think its fair to say the reputation overshadows the actual content for better or worse. it gets more exposure with the remake delightfully making history repeat itself like dis

i think you would like silent hill games for their thoughtfulness i rec emulating 1-3 maybe 4 and maybe give siren a try even though its difficult. it is pure japanese horror and the face model scans are very haunting the plot is also more resident evil-scoped. but yeah very big franchises, tap out when you get tired.

personally i think any remake should be played as a sequel although triple a games are usually finished products when they come out so they dont really need more content? but people talk about remakes all the time so playing through an old game series like dmc made me think about it. DMC4 has a lot of things to like that were never realized or only realized in pachinko games because it wanted to be this big final fantasy hero adventure but had rushed development. playing it feels very stiff and vague and it should have been much longer story wise but it was padded out with nonsense gameplay. it "needs" a remake or prequel for sure! DMC2 was also never realized and i personally like its tone more and i think it could be remade to be the sequel that DMC never got.

DMC truly feels like the designers just did whatever they think is fun and throw it at you and thats good because media should be challenging and the gameplay and puzzles definitely felt like the game was treating you like an adult. I was really surprised when DMC turned out to be important to me. Because it wasnt really where id look for a game experience that is intelligent or subversive. But i was surprised when its an emotionally smart game. ill be honest what makes DMC work is the camp, which isnt necessarily profitable or what a straight audience of noncreatives want so i think thats why it kinda has been worked out since DMC1. but dmc1 güde. i dont remember the last time i noticed i was smiling while playing a game my genuine and& honest reaction

i thought dmc was final fantasy for the longest time which is why i got pleasantly surprised by the dmc1 cutscenes you know the ones when they happened ahahah. that game is just entertaining i hope you and your sister had fun with it too! i have played all of the dmc games now except for the reboot which i am very interested in playing because even though its a bad dmc game from what i have seen it looks like an excellent devilman game it seems their train of thought was very similar to crybaby. dmc4 was almost my least favorite moreso than 2 but i can imagine DMC4 is very good if youre a catholic teenager. dmc5 is worth playing the other games for, its like the details and continuity keep hitting you and V is goth incarnate he is the character ever. his official manga is that good and it has no official english release at all. fucked. the dmc1 anime is fun its very 2008 anime. The franchise overall feels like it keeps giving.but it also feels like its thinning out by relying too much on happy reactions in the reader like jokes. it really hurts vergils character the most i think.

i was so excited to play 4 more games like dmc1 but they are very different which also has its merits i guess but i miss the darker stuff and difficulty. dmc5 gives you gold orbs just for starting the game... the novels can def be skipped for fanwritten lore dumps

its pretty common for people to say that dmc is for kids but i think its exactly for people that have seen all the tropes genres and series it draws on before and want a fresh spin on them that doesnt take itself seriously when it comes to plot but does handle emotional maturity carefully. its different from resident evil in this way right? when they arent implementing internet discourse, then franchises are increasingly asking us to take their stories seriously marvel is prime example of this and i just cant bring myself to gaf so i lov dmc way more than resident evil. i also got into that franchise by chance because i won a copy of re8 village and some of my ps4 games were stolen so i needed things to play. im peeved by the shallowness of the series but they do haunted house experiences SO well. i get a bit scareds. RE engine is also insaaane they really spend so much money on rendering every single wrinkle on dantes ass in leather and dynamic wetness its excellent to play with

the thing about these games is that you can really help getting an attachment to them after playing because they are really effective. i understand the dedicated audiences. I hope you take your time with them and its so awesome to bring somebody else along for the ride. it can be challenging to visit old media that has its installments in perspective to eachother because old players view them retrospectively. but there is also some cool historical fan content to find. and its one of those beloved franchises once you know it you just remember seeing it everywhere. i think my friend had pictures of trish and nevan on her computer when we were like 9 and had no idea what it was from but our favorite activity was of course Google Images

so ya i wrote much but that was all i wanted to say. youll have to list the replies in numbered order or something if you want to add anything XD

clown lady 4 u V have a wonderful day

[michiruze]

Thoughts on Slow Damage

A six-year long wait turned into a desire, and before we know it, today is the euphoric moment of the desire, realized.

I started Slow Damage expecting your usual dark and occasionally trashy but awesome Nitro+Chiral game. Like watching a grindhouse film in an arthouse theatre reserved for people who are into the genre and the subculture around it.

What I got instead is dark, unrelenting, heartbreaking, and cathartic work on the darkness of people, breaking free from chains, desires, and the captive nature of guilt. 

Slow Damage is a painting where colors lights up the dark canvas.

It’s a memorable game that hopefully will go down in VN history, it’s impeccable and mesmerizing, altough still, not for everyone and not for the faint of the heart. But if you do have the heart, please give this game a go. It’s worth your time and money.....and desires. It is very wonderfully made and presented.

My main thought upon finishing Slow Damage is that this is what getting a therapy after suffering for so long in silence feels like. Confronting the hard-to-face, the uncomfortable truth, the source of your pain, speaking up about it....then work for the better. Heading towards light at the end of the tunnel.

Slow Damage is a story of suffering, but there’s always hope to end it.

And for that, it’s hard for me to call Slow Damage as the ‘usual N+C sufferfest’ because SD has a lot to say. And boy, it did.

All the darkness has a reason (Shinkoumi is NOT a wonderful place, and all the suffering is clear), and I find it hard to look away from parts I personally find normally upsetting. This game makes me keep looking at it in a mesmerizing, direct way. I can’t look away, it almost feels like I am having a euphoric session with Towa himself, trying to look into us audiences.

A common theme in this game that I consistently see is how pain and suffering affects our lives. Everyone in the game is tied to their painful pasts and the scars it did. Even whey they live normally, there’s still pain inside of their hearts. It is either remaining pain or worse, repressed pain.

All the smiles and joy are real, it’s a way to keep yourself intact in the painful world of Shinkoumi where everyone gets pain inflicted upon them. However, the sense I am feeling in Rei and Taku’s routes is that while Towa might seem to have 'moved on' from his past through his time today, he’s not actually moving on from his pain. This applies to Taku and Rei. Taku and Rei still have their pain and guilt, and Towa is running away from it.

Towa continues to live on since his life after the pain with Taku and Rei are comfortable. It’s a comfortable new world.....without resolving the pain and problems. Just forgetting it and pretend most of it didn’t happen.

[MAJOR SPOILERS ONWARDS]

Madarame’s route felt like him returning Towa to the plentiful, pleasurable, and ‘better’ past, by making Towa almost recalling his past and pain, but Madarame uses that chance to push him back into 'the good times right after your worst trauma’. Because for Madarame, Towa was at his best and most composed during those days. Why not return to those days? And throw all our opponents and obstacles into the trash?

But this still does not make Towa ‘move on’ from his pain. He just runs away to a different direction.

Even if Towa rejected Maya, he’s still unconsciously doing what Maya does....to Madarame, especially when he decided to try Euphoria session on him. It makes sense after reading Fujieda route.

Which brings us to Fujieda route, and why it’s great. Not only that they both face the darkness in order to find light, the reasons why it’s a great and highly cathartic route is:

1) Towa actually has someone in his side, and friends to help him address his past. And by that, he actually helped them to address their pasts too. Taku and Rei also faces their darkness in the process. We find light together

2)  Towa acknowledges his problems, and while he initially has extreme guilt (he cant separate his art from his PARENT), he thankfully isn't consumed by it. The usage of paint thinner as fuel for fire is also apropos, as paint thinners function as erasers. Towa wished he could be erased to blankness again, but he realizes that he could just make himself better. Like deciding to paint something better on a messy work.

3) Fujieda and Towa work together to find the truth. While it hurts (VERY painful), all they can do is to respect Mei's life by living and becoming better people and supporting eachother, living the life they deserve to have

4)  Both acknowledged pain and their scars. And doesn't think it never existed. Instead, they don’t see it as their sins, and unconditionally embrace eachother in their pain-riddled bodies. It just happens, and there’s nothing they can do to completely erase it. Again, all they can do is support eachother to be better.

5)  Most importantly: not running away from the past and all the pain. And reclaiming those. 

And all of that will bring us into the light.

There’s more to Slow Damage than that, however. The themes of acceptance, guilt over denouncing your parents, and embracing yourself are present, along with the harrowing longtime effects of trauma, written in elegant ways. Fuchii Kabura and Nitro+Chiral took their sweet time improving their craft, and it’s especially present here.

I’m glad I waited so long for Slow Damage, it felt like a tender embrace from the painful world, best described by this BGM track.

That’s all I can say about the game proper. On the artistic front, Yamada Uiro’s art is really great. This game really showed off her sheer skills and talents that she previously only shown in light novels and promo arts for Nitroplus and Nitro+Chiral games.

The character designs are still memorable even though the game has a more realistic setting. The memorable elements comes from the different features each character has and their toned bodies too. There’s something for everyone in this game.

The overall feel of the game in terms of the aesthetics is that while it is dark in the level of Togainu no Chi, it’s actually one of the more colorful games that N+C ever made. Closest comparison I can make is the works of film director Gaspar Noé, specifically his later works. The darker-toned CGs with colorful lighting evoked the same feel of Noé’s cinematographer Benoit Debie with the striking colors dimly lighting the dark.

The 3D backgrounds has improved a lot from DMMD, and overall....the production value is BIG, and you can see it right from the title screen!

As usual, the music is delight to the ears. Personally I adore Madarame’s ending themes. Very much bangers, altough I have soft spots for Rei (GOATBED!!!!! SHUUJI IS BACK!!! PROVING THE ‘GOAT’ IN GOATBED!!!!) and Taku’s themes too.

That’s all I can say about this game, really. It’s a difficult game to write about, and really needed to be experienced.

Overall, I am grateful to have stepped into the dark tunnel of Slow Damage and walking into the light with new perspectives. Slow Damage will make you see impossible colors, and how even the darkest of places can, and will be guided towards the light.

Also, this is an Inada stan account. We stan an unbothered king minding his own business!

[becomingkatie]

Saturday morning at 10am I was stomping around like "the weekend is half over and I haven't gotten anything done yet!" Clearly I was feeling more than a little stressed about maximizing the weekend, lol.

Saturday morning I baked a loaf that I'd mixed up Thursday night and shaped and popped in the fridge Friday morning. It's got fish peppers from my garden and cheddar cheese in it - a nod to a jalapeno cheddar loaf, but I didn't have jalapenos. The fish peppers are SPICY. Like, I cut a slice of bread and my hands tingle and then I scrub them with soap and then if I rub my eyes it still burns them. Soooo, maybe not the best? If you've ever wanted to sweat and cough from eating spicy bread, I have succeeded in making the spicy loaf for you.

Saturday night I made marry me chicken gnocchi soup. I'd say it's medium. Good enough to happily eat the leftovers of, but probably not so tasty that I'll make it again. Well, I say that, but Ken has been saying, "Next time I think I'd (insert small change here)" so I think he actually really enjoyed it and might want it again. Anyway, it's gone well with a slice of toast on the side.

We had a big finances talk Saturday, too, since even over 2 years of marriage the only joint finances we have is a credit card I got where he's an authorized user so we can have a "joint" card. We're going to be moving to a fully (or at least mostly) joined approach (with some separate savings and investments) so we are getting ready for that.

Sunday morning I was in a MUCH better mood and we went for an "easy" gravel ride where I cried on the side of the road and nearly puked in someone's driveway because it was such a challenge. I haven't been riding much, and I haven't been challenging myself much either. Combine that with having covid a few weeks ago, and it was a shock to me how hard this ride was. Ken signed us up for a "mini" 25-mile gravel ride in about 6 weeks, so I have some work to do to make that an enjoyable experience and not a sufferfest. I've done a 40-mile gravel grinder ride a few times and loved it - it just makes me really sad to be in such worse shape now than I used to be. At least I genuinely enjoy cycling so the climb back to where I want to be is something I can have fun with.

After the ride we got bagel sandwiches in the town near the start/stop point. Mine had sausage, egg, cheese, and apple butter. I'm a sweet+savory gal so it was AMAZING. And then we showered and I napped on the living room floor for half a football game. ("Ken, can you put on the football channel so I can take a nap?") After dinner I made a blueberry muffin recipe that uses sourdough discard. I'd been meaning to make them for ages and finally had discard in the fridge and time to whip them up. It said to divide into 12 muffins... I am not sure that was the right move. But they taste great.

It's going to be a busy week. Plenty of work, a vet neurologist appointment for Theo, both individual and couple's therapy on Tuesday (I hate double-therapy days ugh), and trying to stay up late and push hard to finish editing this book so I can publish it before the end of the month. This weekend we want to bike again, and I want to do some training stationary bike workouts during the week, and we also both need to make sure we have clothes (or, more likely, get some clothes) for the two October weddings we have coming up. So I am Stressed but it'll be a good time if I can manage to enjoy myself through all the busy. And people add kids on top of this??? Howwww???

[thereareeyesinsidethetrees]

trying to figure out which one of my wips i should prioritize writing

we have eldritch ford (not too concerned with that one), more ford trio (even less concerned with that one), various random ideas from my list (which are mostly fun ideas and aus but there's too many), and then we have sufferfest 2.0 and sufferfest the original.

Those last two are somewhat similar (hence them being put together and having the same name), but not enough that i can write them into one singuar fic

both have lots of angst and horror, but sufferfest original arguably has more of that. both would probably be multichapter. sufferfest 2.0 would have both stan and ford perspectives. sufferfest original is either exclusively or primarily in stan's perspective

as you can see, im a bit more excited about those last two wips

[farotrails]

Tecumseh Trail Challenge 50k race report

Tecumseh Trail Challenge 50k. Yellowwood State Forest, IN. Oct 19 2024. 7:41:09. Strava link.

the training block leading up to the race was less than ideal. maintenance miles at about 30/week, some dedicated hills, a few multi-hour runs. the real gains came with the mental training: ditching headphones and learning to listen to the wilderness, not getting frustrated with low effort low pace low fun long runs. everything over 21 miles was unexplored going into the race, and i wanted to maintain the curiosity that got me to that point. life got busy and the physical side was going to have to come down to base fitness from a couple years of consistent running.

flat cola rules and was the real mvp. everything was going stellar; perfect; unbridled by pain and suffering for the first 16 miles. pace was consistent, effort was similar (but creeping up as the miles ticked by), and importantly i was still eating.

not that anything was really expected beyond finishing at all, but it would have been really hard to anticipate how the race would affect me from mile 21 onward. the aid at mile 21 (dam 1) came into view, and instantly all appetite disappeared. i was still in good spirits, but food didn't sound good at all. i had a few chips and a slice of orange, refilled my water, and headed out for the next 5 mile section.

that's where the real sufferfest started. knee inflammation made uphill running slow and the climbing hr made it less economical than the nearly-as-slow hike. downhills were still happening but getting worse. "oh well, we're getting by, i signed up for this and knew some parts would be rough."

dam 2 at mile 26. i came in completely blown up, filled up my water, had a quarter piece of pbj and took off without a word. the marathon mark came and went with a sigh as i started jogging off towards a creek crossing and the last 5 miles.

this section was mostly a trial of power hiking, or death marching, or stubbornly aching towards the finish. mixed with moments of brilliant inspiration and shaky running. the full scope of this endeavor came into view as i retreated further into my own head. a modest 250 foot high / 0.1 mile long climb marked mile 28. i mutter "fuck" and keep my cadence without a second thought.

this was the breakthrough moment. my "why" had always been that i think my fitness can get me through an ultra, i love being outdoors running these trails, and i'm curious what running that long in a supported environment would feel like. the expectation of ayahuasca-tripping-tech-bro mind expansion was a rumor. and still is (pranked ya). but what that trudge taught me is that my conviction in the face of suffering was unwavering. that the pain i felt, now scraping the bottom of the barrel for "acceptable caloric and carb intake" as I slowly jog into and out of mile 29 aid (margaritaville) without consideration of the wares, wasn't going to stand in the way of this goal.

and if this was possible in an athletic pursuit where a dnf would be disappointing but without a real consequence, why could it not be possible in other situations that actually matter? i forced a smile. full coherent thoughts weren't happening but the satisfaction of movement broke through. i caught up to two other runners at mile 30 and listened as they made conversation and i explored my own human ability to make sounds with my mouth. but together we ran it in.

two beers and a cookie later brain function was returning around a fire. the reflection on this accomplishment started. i think it has made me more calm, more aware, more trusting of my intuition, and more confident in situations requiring tenacity. the hay was in the barn, the training had been done, but those last 5 miles were not something i think i could have trained for. they just had to be experienced and dealt with. the marathon was relatively easy. and then it got very very hard. and i can't wait for my next one.

epilogue: MoMoFo 100k in June. also going to look for a 50k in spring to fill in the gap, hang out with really fit people, and see what about the experience changes in the face of a looming 100k race. i love this sport. i love that the barrier to entry is a pair of shoes and the courage to commit to the training and hold on. and i love how participation can lead to soul crushing lows and life defining highs and unwavering determination to get this shit done. it reinforced that this is a lifetime journey.

when i started training for my first half marathon a few years ago, i had wrote the distance off with "i don't need to do that, i'm comfortable running 10ks." but then started the "why not run a half marathon." and then "why not run on trails in the forest." and then "why not train for an ultra." i couldn't answer that why not, and i still can't, and i hope i never can. stay curious.

[runnersnz]

"I started running at primary school, somewhat reluctantly, doing the required cross-country. And being at a small Fiordland school, if there was a sports team for anything, you sort of all have to play, just to make up the numbers!

Both my parents did the first Kepler Challenge and I remember “running” with Dad while he was training and trying to keep up with him... as much as an eight year old can. Around that time there was also a local run/bike event that went from Manapouri to Te Anau. You’d be in teams of two where you'd leap frog one another, leaving your bike on the side of the road and then start running. That would have been my first race but I didn't really run again after I left school. I did spend my youth volunteering for the Kepler Challenge though; amazed at how people could possibly run that far and never once believing that I could do it myself.

Years later I worked for DOC on the Milford Track, essentially chasing whio (blue duck) up and down a river. That kept me pretty fit as I was always on my feet a lot, hiking and climbing hills. So I decided to enter the Luxmore Grunt, essentially with no training, aside from chasing ducks. I did the Luxmore Grunt two years in a row and I did all right. And then I just stopped running again, for about fifteen years.

It was during the Covid lockdown that I took it up again properly. Mostly because there was nothing else to do, you couldn't go anywhere. I'd sort of tried to get back into running a few times, but I'd always injure myself early on because I’d go out too far, too fast, too soon. So lockdown was a good opportunity to do it right and I made a plan to take it slow. I even found a ‘couch to 5k’ plan and (mostly) stuck to it. But then they let us out of lockdown and I sort of just bolted! I found all the trails close to home on the Wild Things website and it ballooned out of control quite quickly. I was like “how many trails can I tick off?” I live in Christchurch with the Port Hills on my doorstep - so it turns out there’s a lot!

I found another training plan online and decided to train for the Motatapu Marathon. Unfortunately it was cancelled because of Covid, so I ran a 42km loop around Lyttleton Harbour. I just thought “I wonder if I can”. And I could, although it was a bit of a sufferfest. (I also had to because it was the only way to get back to the car!). 

Why did I run? I think I just really enjoyed the freedom of being out of the house and in nature. I don't know, it's quite relaxing... as much as it can hurt at times. And I think for me, those mental health benefits you get from being outside, moving and having time to think were really important. And I love a challenge - I'm very badge orientated. If there's a way of gamifying something, you've got me! And ticking off as many trails as I could had me hooked.

I’d listen to podcasts on my runs and there was an episode on Dirt Church Radio that stuck with me. Madeleine Collins from Auckland had done a challenge during lockdown where she ran an 8km loop in January... and then she ran it twice in February, three times in March, four times in April, continuing on like that for a whole year, finally running twelve loops in December. That challenge really appealed to me; that kind of incremental, increasing suffering, a ‘I don't know if this thing is possible’ kind of thing. I didn’t jump on it right away, but doing something similar was always in the back of my mind.

Then my Aunt Joan passed away from younger onset dementia a couple of years ago. Dementia Canterbury, a support network for patients and their families, had been a really useful resource for her and her family, and so I decided to try and raise some money for them in memory of my Aunt, to give back for all that they did. My Uncle Pete had ridden the length of New Zealand as a fundraiser and I still had this Madeleine Collins idea mulling around in my head. So I decided it was an opportunity to amalgamate these two ideas; raise some cash for Dementia Canterbury, and set myself a fun challenge... well, type two fun.

For my “Adventure for Dementia”, I settled on a 5km loop in the Port Hills, known as the “Pipeline of Pain”. It just sounds so appealing, doesn’t it. It has 490 metres of climbing over that 5km. The plan was I’d run one loop in January, two in February, three times in March, all the way through to December. The final run in December was 62 kilometres with 5,780 metres elevation. Okay it’s not really a run, it was basically straight up the gas pipeline, then it was too steep to run down the other side really, and then it was into another steep up and down. December's 12 loops took me 18 hours to complete. 

I was so fortunate to have a whole lot of community support around me for this. I did the single January lap by myself because I hadn't told anyone what or why I was doing it, and I didn't know yet if it was even possible. But people slowly found out and basically every lap thereafter people would join me. One guy Ken, who at the time I didn't really know, joined me in May and he did all five laps with me. Then he came back for June, July, August, right through to December. I did 78 laps in total and Ken did 68. We're quite good mates now, after spending a lot of time and suffering together. Heaps of other people that I'd never met before joined in for laps too. Some people got wind of it and drove from miles away to be a part of it. Some people just wanted to come and challenge themselves on the Pipeline track, and some came because they had a dementia connection.

I/We raised $13,000 for Dementia Canterbury - very stoked!! That was nine months ago now. I still like running, but I didn't run for some months afterwards. I was a tad broken, but I learnt that it's possible... that it's absolutely possible... you just have to be stubborn, keep moving.... and remember to eat!

I do want to know what more I am capable of. I don't feel like I’ve hit the limit yet, maybe because I haven't failed. I feel like there's more. I've got a miler on my list, another Backyard Ultra maybe. 

My advice, just go and do it I reckon. If you don't get out there and give it a go you'll never know what's possible!"Amy @amy_goes_adventuring (Christchurch) Photo taken in Te Anau– Portraits of Runners + their stories @RunnersNZ

[veradune]

I am late to the end of year asks so just, any questions you really want to answer but haven't been asked yet and also your favorite Missy moment of the year

Oho! I would love to rant about these three things:

7. Favorite actor of the year?

I definitely developed an Ebon Moss-Bachrach situation.

8. Game of the year?

I gave Disco Elysium another shot at the beginning of this year and ended up so obsessed I beat it in a week, I am still thinking about it 11 months later. Should I be worried about Harry DuBois being a mood? Probably.

13. How was your birthday this year?

I had an interesting birthday week that consisted of:

Taking a buddy up Yamnuska for a shared 38th birthday sufferfest

Backpacking on the actual day of where we lost half the group for 48 hours and it turned into an episode of Mantracker or something. I had to hitchhike with a stranger to get my car so we could then pile more people and gear into it than it has ever hauled because whoops we lost 2/3rds of the car shuttle. Lost people eventually stumbled out onto the road at the end of the weekend.

And then my family took me out for pickle pizza and pinball at the local hipster bar (nice)

As for Missy moments here's a sequence of me introducing her to Noah Kahan's music.

[fendrieneu]

Rouvy Virtual Vuelta – Tranquilo! Stage 4 – La Hermida

It was a sufferfest to end the Tranquilo Virtual Vuelta on Rouvy. Nearly 1200 feet of climbing in just 19 miles with a couple of sharp peaks early on and then a long but shallow climb to finish the event. There was also the added challenge thrown in of a golden kilometre in association with Strava which came before the first climb and carried a spot prize. I went all in for the golden K and…

[merkabici]

Oferta rodillo Elite Turno - Análisis en vídeo

En el mundo del ciclismo, la búsqueda de la excelencia en el entrenamiento es constante. Cada pedalada cuenta, cada esfuerzo es crucial para alcanzar tus metas. Es aquí donde entra en escena el Rodillo para Entrenamiento Ciclista Elite Turno. Con su transmisión directa y resistencia progresiva por fluido en función de la velocidad, este dispositivo se erige como una herramienta esencial para ciclistas de todos los niveles. En este artículo, exploraremos a fondo las características que hacen del Elite Turno una opción inigualable para optimizar tu entrenamiento. Suscripción Gratuita y Conectividad Sin Igual En un mundo cada vez más interconectado, la tecnología juega un papel vital en la evolución del entrenamiento ciclista. Al adquirir el Rodillo Elite Turno, no solo obtienes un equipo de primera clase, sino que también te garantizas una suscripción gratuita de 12 meses al software y la aplicación My E-Training. Esto te brinda acceso a un sinfín de herramientas y recursos diseñados para potenciar tu rendimiento. Transmisión Directa Inteligente y Sensor Misuro B + La base de un entrenamiento efectivo reside en la precisión de los datos. El Elite Turno se destaca al ser un Hometrainer de transmisión directa inteligente con el sistema integrado Sensor Misuro B+. Esto significa que tus métricas, como velocidad, potencia y cadencia, son capturadas con una exactitud excepcional y transmitidas a través de ANT+ a dispositivos inteligentes. La compatibilidad con aplicaciones populares como Zwift, Trainerroad, Bikevo, Kinomap y Sufferfest asegura que puedas aprovechar al máximo tus entrenamientos. Potencia y Compatibilidad Sin Límites El Elite Turno no se queda atrás en términos de potencia y versatilidad. Con una capacidad máxima de 1580 vatios a 60 km/h y 780 vatios a 40 km/h, este rodillo es capaz de satisfacer las demandas de ciclistas exigentes. Su volante de inercia de 5 kg garantiza una sensación de carretera realista, mientras que su compatibilidad con cassettes Shimano 9/10/11 velocidades estándar asegura que puedas entrenar con tu bicicleta preferida. ¿Cómo Zwift ayuda a identificar talentos deportivos? Descubre la tecnología fluida para una resistencia excepcional ¿Qué hace que este rodillo sea tan especial? Imagina poder simular diferentes terrenos y condiciones climáticas desde la comodidad de tu hogar. Con nuestro rodillo inteligente, esta visión se convierte en realidad gracias a su tecnología fluida de resistencia. A diferencia de los rodillos tradicionales, que pueden sentirse monótonos, este modelo ofrece una experiencia realista y estimulante. Potencia máxima que impulsa tus límites Con una potencia máxima impresionante de 700 W, este rodillo inteligente está diseñado para desafiar tus límites y mejorar tu rendimiento. Ya sea que estés entrenando para una carrera importante o simplemente deseas mantenerte en forma, este dispositivo te proporcionará la intensidad que necesitas. Conectividad inalámbrica y compatibilidad avanzada Mantente conectado mientras entrenas La comunicación inalámbrica es clave en la era moderna del ciclismo. Nuestro rodillo inteligente ofrece conectividad ANT+ y Bluetooth, lo que significa que puedes conectarlo fácilmente a tus dispositivos y aplicaciones favoritas para un seguimiento preciso y datos en tiempo real. Rodillos inteligentes consejos para comprar el mejor Compatibilidad con una variedad de software y aplicaciones No importa si eres un entusiasta de My E-Training, Zwift, Trainerroad o Kinomap, este rodillo inteligente es compatible con una variedad de software y aplicaciones de ciclismo. Esto te permite personalizar tus sesiones de entrenamiento y mantenerte motivado mientras compites virtualmente con ciclistas de todo el mundo. Adaptable a diferentes tipos de bicicletas Perfecto para tu bicicleta favorita Independientemente de si prefieres una bicicleta de carrera ágil, una mountain bike resistente o una bicicleta de ciudad versátil, este rodillo inteligente es compatible con todos estos tipos. Esto lo convierte en una opción versátil que se adapta a tus preferencias y estilo de ciclismo. Diseñado para la Diversidad La comunidad ciclista abarca diversas disciplinas y estilos. El Elite Turno abraza esta diversidad al ofrecer compatibilidad con bicicletas de carretera, montaña y ciudad. Incluso si tu bicicleta cuenta con un cuadro de fibra de carbono, el Elite Turno puede acomodarla sin problemas. Su capacidad de trabajar con bujes de 130-135 x 5 mm con cierre rápido y 142x12 mm Thru-Axle asegura que no tengas restricciones a la hora de entrenar. Accesorio Opcional para un Impulso Extra Si buscas llevar tus entrenamientos al siguiente nivel, el Elite Turno tiene cubierto incluso ese aspecto. Un accesorio opcional para 148x12 mm Boost está disponible, brindándote la oportunidad de incrementar aún más tu rendimiento. Conclusion En resumen, el Rodillo para Entrenamiento Ciclista Elite Turno se erige como una herramienta esencial en el arsenal de cualquier ciclista comprometido con el progreso. Su transmisión directa, precisión en las métricas y amplia compatibilidad lo convierten en una inversión valiosa para alcanzar tus metas ciclistas. Prepárate para explorar nuevas fronteras en tu entrenamiento con la potencia y precisión del Elite Turno. https://youtu.be/4B-20Ql0nSQ Fuente vídeo: INEQUILA Preguntas Frecuentes 1. ¿Necesito experiencia previa en el uso de rodillos de entrenamiento para aprovechar el Elite Turno? Absolutamente no. El Elite Turno está diseñado para ciclistas de todos los niveles, desde principiantes hasta profesionales. 2. ¿Qué ventajas ofrece la transmisión directa inteligente? La transmisión directa inteligente del Elite Turno garantiza una conexión perfecta con aplicaciones de entrenamiento populares y una precisión excepcional en la captura de datos. 3. ¿Puedo utilizar el Elite Turno con mi bicicleta de montaña? Sí, el Elite Turno es compatible con bicicletas de carretera, montaña y ciudad, asegurando una experiencia versátil. 4. ¿Cuál es la función del accesorio opcional para Boost? El accesorio opcional para Boost te permite llevar tu rendimiento al siguiente nivel al incrementar la potencia y resistencia de tus entrenamientos. 5. ¿Cómo puedo aprovechar al máximo la suscripción gratuita a My E-Training? La suscripción gratuita a My E-Training te brinda acceso a planes de entrenamiento personalizados y herramientas de seguimiento de rendimiento, optimizando tus sesiones de entrenamiento. Read the full article

[merrillsafricabikeadventure]

Monday April 10 Stage 14- Sesriem to Toulou’s Farm, Namibia

Today’s ride was supposed to be an 88 mile jaunt on sand and gravel but I bailed at 15 miles. Soft sand and gravel is hard enough but Mother Nature added head winds in the range of 18-25 mph and it was too much for me. My pace dropped to 5-6 mph and that was with a lot of energy expended. I’m not here to have a sufferfest so I flagged down a support vehicle and was happy to get in. Both the dinner and lunch trucks have small passenger compartments known colloquially as “dog boxes” and I had plenty of company in the “box” before the day was done. Many riders did finish but they were the ones to look like whipped dogs.

The dog box.

Toulou’s Farm is what we might call a ranch. It’s off grid and the mail box 110 miles away. The ranch is 16,000 sparse desert acres where they run cattle, sheep and goats. It’s a third generation operation and, needless to say, they need to be self sufficient. They have a few cabins for rent and let us camp around their house. Bennie is the proprietor and he acted like he had not seen another human in months.

[trixies-allstar-crown]

Laurens ten Dam returns to Transcordilleras Rally Colombia for ‘sufferfest’

Group of four Dutch riders set for 852km ride across Andes mountains in eight-day stage event from CyclingNews RSS Feed https://ift.tt/5dbhmS0

[sueheaven]

Indoor Cycling Software Market is Booming Worldwide | Gaining Revolution In Eyes of Global Exposure

Latest business intelligence report released on Global Indoor Cycling Software Market, covers different industry elements and growth inclinations that helps in predicting market forecast. The report allows complete assessment of current and future scenario scaling top to bottom investigation about the market size, % share of key and emerging segment, major development, and technological advancements. Also, the statistical survey elaborates detailed commentary on changing market dynamics that includes market growth drivers, roadblocks and challenges, future opportunities, and influencing trends to better understand Indoor Cycling Software market outlook. List of Key Players Profiled in the study includes market overview, business strategies, financials, Development activities, Market Share and SWOT analysis are:

Zwift Inc. (United States)

Strava (United States)

Sufferfest (United States)

Trainer Road (United States)

Rouvy ( Czechia)

BODY BIKE (Denmark)

SpiviTech Ltd. (United States)

CycleCast (United States)

Garmin Ltd. (India) The Indoor Cycling Software market is expected to grow in the future due to the rising concern about health and fitness among individuals and rising traffic and pollution on road. The key feature is that allows indoor cyclists to join group rides where they can measure themselves against others in the comfort of their own homes. Also offers a wealth of specific training plans that are built around the rider’s goals. Key Market Trends: Advancement and Innovation in Indoor Cycling Software Opportunities: Growing Awareness Regarding this Technology in both Developed and Developing nations

Government Initiatives Promoting a Healthy Lifestyle Market Growth Drivers: Growing Concern about Health and Fitness among Individuals

Increasing Traffic and Pollutions which Limiting the Cyclists on Road Challenges: Lack of Awareness among the Consumers The Global Indoor Cycling Software Market segments and Market Data Break Down by Application (Professional Training, Health and Fitness, Racing, Interactive Tourism, Others), App (Paid App, Free App), Platform (IOS, Android, Windows, Mac), End User (Professional Trainers, Personal Users), Session (Solo, Group)

Presented By

AMA Research & Media LLP

[alpinefitco]

Packrafting Gear List

Packrafting is intensely fun if you ever get the chance. Packing the gear is a chore. I often find myself packing and repacking wondering where the extra space in my bag has gone. Once the boating gear is packed it leaves little room for other essentials, so pack wisely! A disappointing amount of extra space and a heavy pack are the norm, no matter how light your backpack and tent are. Here in Alaska, we need to prepare for the weather, and there can be snow in the Brooks Range in August which makes the adventures even more fun :) 

Below is my packing list with a focus on saving weight for all the gram counters out there. There are many great brands out there and listing all the options is out of the scope of this article. Trust your local guide or gear shop, you can usually find an excited local for recommendations.

Packrafting gear

Packraft: Do you really need thigh straps? To save weight remove them if you can. I’ve heard of some creative ways to save on seats and seat backs with nylon webbing for a true sufferfest

Paddle: 4-section paddles are neater but more prone to breaking. 2-section paddles might give you the comfort of only bringing the one rather than packing a spare

Dry Suit: Water temp and safety make this a priority, possible to eliminate in warmer climates or very safe flatwater trips

Life vest - Get a light one!

Helmet: May not be necessary on easier trips

Throw rope: A dedicated polyester throw rope that doesn’t absorb water 

Repair kit: No weight saving here

Bow bag: Get creative and this can serve as an extra pocket on your backpack

Clothing

Baselayers: Alpine fit of course! Lightweight, long lasting, doesn’t stink, quick drying. Save weight by not needing extra backup clothing. I rarely bring a short sleeve, it never gets used

Underwear: 2 pair, wool

Midlayer: One pair of quick-dry pants like bushwhacking leggings, thin synthetic puffy jacket

Footwear: Paddle shoes or boots (not both), crocs, 2 pair wool socks

Headwear: Brimmed hat, Alpine Fit merino wool hat, bug net

Gloves: Paddling gloves are a luxury but much needed on some trips. 

Sunglasses: Preferably polarized. Best to have a safety cord in case of a spill

Camping Equipment

Backpack: A no-frills backpack to save weight is important. The lighter ones usually fit inside the boat better as well. I will admit on shorter trips or trips with lots of hiking I take a backpack with a more comfortable harness system

Tent: The lighter the better. Options abound but one with a quick setup is nice after a long day

Sleeping mat: The new thicker sleeping mats have changed the game. If you haven’t bought one recently they are light and comfy, best of both worlds

Pillow: I’ve suffered using a stuff sack with clothes for years but recent air pillows don’t add much weight and I sleep better

Sleeping bag: Save weight with a quilt

Headlamp: Make sure it’s charged or has new batteries. Don’t bring extra batteries if you don’t have to

Water filter: Get a soft-squeeze water bottle with attached filter. Super light and easy

Eating utensils: Sierra cup doubles as cup and bowl. Titanium spork for eating

Stove: Get a contained unit like JetBoil. Lightweight, efficient

Food: Take your pick of freeze dried options plus some snacks for mid-day

Extras

Sunscreen: Pack as little as you can. Remember Alpine Fit is UPF 50+!

Lip Balm: No more than 1 per person

Navigation: Lots of weight to save here. One paper map is a good backup. Otherwise I use my smartphone for everything now. Apps like Gaia and Avenza mean the days of an extra GPS unit are over

First Aid: Size depends on the length of trip but make sure you can take care of the basics and have enough for the whole party

Fire Starter: I have collected sap and hunted for dry twigs but having one good fire on a trip makes for a happier bunch. Now I bring one fire starting stick that I break in half for 2 fires

Bear Can: I do the Ursak and hang it when I can

Bear Protection: Bear spray and sometimes some small flares. Definitely not a firearm, waaayyyy to heavy

Insect Repellant: Don’t use deet, it wears on latex cuffs and anything plastic. Use picaridin which doesn't have all the drawbacks of deet

Toiletries: Only the basics, one roll of TP, toothbrush/toothpaste, one flosser, a plastic shovel or trowel for digging a cat hole for your poop

Be��safe out there but don’t suffer! Pack and weigh your bag before you go. If you are tipping 50lb and have lots of hiking to do, then try and take the unnecessary items out. If it’s a short trip and you have less food, or if you are on the water for a few days at the beginning then you can pack a little extra. Have fun!!

[seaottersandstrings]

something lgbt just happened to me (extreme emotional pain edition)

(ignore me I just need an internet void to scream in where she wont see it or read if you’re nosy and willing to be nice about it)

(also if anyone has any advice for how to not be so fucked up about the girl who is kinda your ex but not really (in the “never actually dated but we both had feelings and acted like it a lot” way) officially dating a new person for the first time since she shattered your heart into a million tiny pieces please dm me said advice this is 100% serious)

like we have all the same friends and it’s been over half a year so I feel weird talking to irl people about it. even I am surprised at how intensely the emotions punched me in the lungs when she told us she has a bf now. like cmon brain I knew we weren’t over this but I thought we were at least getting better. 

also there’s the added fun layer of “her own internalized biphobia and biphobic family members made it so our connection was always laced with shame and repression and suffering anyway.” and now she gets to celebrate this moment with friends and family and do boy talk with her mom and ask her parents for advice about this guy she’s known for a couple months and have an easy friends to lovers arc with him. while I was stuck listening to her family coo over how she should get back with her ex bf once he transferred to our college while she and I were literally sleeping in the same bed the night before. but bc I’m not a guy ofc nothing could possibly have been going on there. 

like you’re telling me I was in a years-long, will-they-won’t-they sufferfest where I was embarrassingly emotionally devoted to this person only for npc #3 to crawl out of the woodwork and get the instant stamp of approval for wanting to get to know her better and giving it the old college try? 

and to be clear I’m not blaming her she feels how she feels and obviously the bi/homophobia is a societal/community level issue. it just sucks so bad to fall so deeply in love with someone over such a long time and have those feelings be treated less seriously because of things we can’t control. like just on top of the regular heartbreak of it all. and believe me the regular heartbreak of it all is more than enough for my little eggshell heart to handle. 

and on a regular heartbreak level it also sucks because she’s a good person that I genuinely care about on a non-romantic level and still think very highly of. like our relationship wasn’t and still isn’t perfect but she’s one of the best people in my life and an objectively decent human being. so it’s not like I can even rationalize to myself “well it was toxic” (actually maybe the dynamic was but like SHE wasn’t a toxic person y’know) or “she treated me badly” or “she sucks so I’m better off now anyway.” like no she’s wonderful and her new bf is very lucky life just sucks sometimes. 

did I mention she and I are still best friends and even though we live in different cities now which helps I still have to pretend to be totally 100% excited about this for the sake of being a good bestie? like god I love being a lesbian if I had to do life all over again and got a choice I would choose to be queer every single goddamn time. but this is the most painful shit I’ve ever felt in my life and that’s a pretty high bar at this point. especially since this is technically not my first heartbreak but it’s my first one since realizing I’m a lesbian and not bi and started having a lot of The Piercing Loneliness of Breaking Every Societal Expectation feelings about it. like I think my brain was unintentionally pulling a “maybe I’ll turn out normal-passing” on itself (which is total bullshit) for a while there. and even though I know that was bullshit coming to terms with being a lesbian was so much harder for me than coming to terms with being queer at all and everything related to it has just felt so much more intense since. 

and on some level I’m also jealous bc she got out and can have a relationship she can celebrate and talk about with her family without fear and I can never have that. like bi people obviously go through so much shit and have a hard time getting both straight and gay people to take them seriously and as someone who lived that (in the “other people treated me like I was bi bc we all thought I was” sense) and thought that was who I was for 7 years I would never want to diminish that but oh my god being on the other side now I can understand how easy it is to let yourself get bitter. And I never want to be that person but at the same time speaking purely of my own experience it didn’t take me so long (2+ years) to figure out I was a lesbian because I just didn’t know like at some point deep down I knew especially near the end of my questioning era but I kept asking myself “well are you SURE?” because didn’t want to face the loneliness of it. Of closing the door on the last possible chance I had for my family and I to bond over something in a normal way for once. And coming out again was incredibly freeing but I also had to be willing to break my own heart to do it and the compounding heartbreak is just so much. 

anyway if anyone is reading this I love you and I hope you’re having a better day than me. happy new year. 

[davidwfloydart]

I need time and space to be alone so I can overthink things, over eat and suffer… #overthinker #overthinkingkills #obessivecompulsivedisorder #overeatingdisorder #holidayseason #sufferfest #sufferinsilence #suffermode (at Catalina Foothills, Arizona) https://www.instagram.com/p/CXeATL0p05irDgKY9bEaPARKWAd5iykU-3PqxU0/?utm_medium=tumblr