#stray rizz

[kazcassette]

I LUV HAN SO MACH (got lazy on le hamster)

BARRSS

[yang-innie]

I.N ⋆ Teen Vogue

[9xyzt]

guys oh

“Just feel the Rock”☆彡

Ren is dressed as Leeknows outfit in one of the “Lalalala” Rockstar album performances!

og

[mybodyfails]

[evilkaeya]

bro said EWW... personally I would not have recovered from that

[eomcheong-keun-megi]

WAT DID HE SAAAYYYYY~¿

[iridescentdove]

I need a BSD x Reader where it’s just the reader casually rizzing up everyone like no one is safe from the reader’s infinite rizz, not the ADA, not the PM, not the DOA, not the guild, and definitely not the Hunting Dogs, not even civilians; it’s literally everyone that is getting rizzed up, while the reader is aware and laughs and points at every clown they rizzed up.

THE ULTIMATE RIZZLORD.

various!BSD x reader

A/N: anon, I would like to point out how much I love you and this request right now. also, I put the reader in the port mafia for fun because why not.

Absolutely speechless.

This is how everyone felt – well, whether whoever it may be, there was just one thing all could collectively agree on. They may all be feared and powerful factions that anyone could basically kneel down to, however ...

Who THE FUCK is this audacious person?

MORI was the first to witness your ass flirt with every single person you saw. But no, did you even care? Not at all. He stares, bewildered and mildly in concern as you came up to every single person you saw – completely distracted from the mission at hand as you asked women to step on you, choke you ...

He wants you throw you back from where you came from.

Oh wait, nevermind. You were now flirting with HIM. MORI is in even more shock at your confidence. Damn, pretty bold of you. But he actually thought you kinda hot fr. Elise still #1 bae tho

And somehow, you were taken up to being an executive. Everyone is morbid and utterly terrified.

How the fuck is someone like you an EXECUTIVE?? HELLO??

CHUUYA turns as red as his hair could ever be. Look man, he just wanted to complain about Dazai and you here just ..

"That fucking idiot Dazai! I'll rip him apart!"

"Yes daddy- I mean, can you do that to me too?"

"... What?"

"Ooh~ those fingers are so slender and pretty .."

"Wh-"

"Mind if I ... caress them a little, babygorl?"

"(Y/N) WHAT-"

Aww, look at that, Chuuya is deader than Odasaku <3

But God forbid you be taken on important missions against another factiom because fuck man. All you're there for is 1% fighting, 99% rizzing.

Y'know when everything was in chaos in Yokohama bcz of the Guild trying to take over? Everyone's fighting their ass off, God knows where DAZAI is but no one cares, and you?? Uh yeah already guessed it.

Tryna rizz up the agency.

Like yes, they're in trouble, everyone is, we know but fuck war we want fictional men. And women.

"Are you lingo? Because we can make a good duo 😏" - you

"... Did you just make a duolingo pickup line" - kunikida

Man times when the port mafia and the agency are in a truce, you're there back and forth flirting nonstop. Everyone is red, turned on from your oh so amazing rizzler skills

DAZAI enjoys your company obviously. Both of you create so much chaos, but even sometimes you're so much worse than him. You're the only one who can actually surprise him. Like wtf bitch stop flirting with the damn secret police?? Uh??

You make suicidal jokes, whispering them so sexily in his ear he wanna take you to the bed right there mamasita lip bite

Oh, the Decay of Angels wanna achieve world domination? They can dominate sumn else if you know what I mean

No words can express how terrified u keep making everyone THAT'S FYODOR HE'LL KILL YOU WITH A TOUCH BITCH- oh wait nvm he's melting from all of your rizz and affection.

You are literally so sweet but so confusing. SIGMA sees you around the Sky Casino just chilling and flirting with everyone you see. He don't mind cause you hot anyway

The Guild kinda ... actually, no. They're not safe. FITZGERALD? More like Rizzgerald cause this bitch 'bout to get rizzed so hard he turns poor

Yeah .. I don't take it to heart.

You'll just be up in their ass even after the Yokohama incident. Literally all of them both love and hate you. "Should we throw her off a cliff or kiss her" "Idk the second option is kinda tempting tho" "Boss, what do we d-" "Both."

DAMN LOVECRAFT AND BRAM TOO?? BITCH STOP 😭

No one can escape from your rizz. Okay one time you got kidnapped by the fuckin Hunting Dogs but you just?? Started to rizz up and call JOUNO ur bbygorl?? He is seconds from slicing your head off but he gave up at this point.

Where you got that rose from 🤨

Why the fuck is romantic music playing 😐

You asked FUKUCHI himself to choke you and slam you against the wall. Not even an ounce of regret of fear.

Everyone officially is scared of you.

ANGO isn't free from this either, bitch. You'll strut into the room all happy to talk for a mission and all but ... uhh. "So you're from the Special Division? I can't blame you then ... I feel as if I have something special going on for you."

ANGO, internally: iamnotasimp- iamnotasimp- iamnotasimp-

Sadly, he is now a simp.

The fact his face turns so red is not unnoticed by you. You laugh, clowning everyone you literally rizzed up no joke. They're so in love with ur pretty/handsome/hot ass 😔

No one is free. If you find a pretty bird, ask it's hand for marriage. There is no other way but that.

Mk but the way you literally hit on AKUTAGAWA do be funny. Bitch is so oblivious, he just thinks you're another certain blonde hair slaying bitch 😳

By the time he actually knows you're rizzing him up by being more direct about your advances, he is questioning life.

But bcz you're SOO close to DAZAI maybeee we can ...

Work sumn out, you know? heh

One day the mafia just be chilling and BOOM heree comes the wh00000re~ hello wh000re~ welcome~ 😍

(i am so sorry if this offends someone it's a meme-)

Cue everyone sighing as you come in and start your daily routine which is rizzing. You'll be caressing KOUYOU's cheek, talking to CHUUYA with that sexy ass deep voice, whispering in MORI's ear, and everytime you breathe the vine boom sound effect comes off.

Can't say they don't like it though. We all know we have some horny deviants lovestruck little cuties <3 but let's just say it's hard being here with those hoes 😔✌️

Yet most especially,

You.

*bites lip* (i am sorry.)

[justcallmesakira]

"All pickup lines are taken, can I pick you up?~

Sypnosis: Whats better then flirting with your own lover by shocking him with the most flabbergasting pickup line?

Genre: Lowkey crack, a bit suggestive?

Pairings: Dazai x reader

A/N: this was so fun especially since this was a short drabble💗💗💗guys read it again if you already read it I made slight changes

Today was probably the quietest day in the agency especially since dazai was somehow in a calm mood today. Though it's a very rare possibility of dazais shenanigans to not be on display, everyone was doing their work.

Dazai was leaning against a wall probably thinking of some suicide method in that brain of his. Only God knew what goes on in that big brain of his.

You came marching over to the office with a cheeky grin on yourself which immediately made ranpo jolt up from his seat with a shocked look on his face... Oh boy what did he deduce....

"Helloooo~ donna'! How was your da-" Before dazai could speak the whole of your arm was right beside him with your knee bend down beside his pair of daddy long legs which immediately made his eyes widen in shock.

Only silence in the agency could be heard for a few seconds before everyone's eyes switch to you pining the bandaged man to him.

"I'd love to take you to the movies but they don't let you bring your own snacks" you spit out with a grinding face which makes dazai brain a long time to process what in the rizz lord did you say.

Oh ho ho, you didn't stop there

"By the way, Dazai have we met before? Because you look like my next husband"

you winked at dazai with the most nasty eye, the type of expression which any boy would give to a girl.

Yosano was sighing with ranpo beside her giving them the nastiest eye anyone in the room could give. Atsushi was beyond flustered by your bold move, good thing kenji and kyouka went on a playda-- I mean mission.

Kunikida was simply shocked because of his no pda rule.

Dazai's senses finally came back which made him snicker. "my my, belladonna, trying to be dominating now are we, Though the thought of sliding a ring on your empty finger isn't a bad idea" He really had the audacity to tease you and grin at you while he's the one being pushed against the wall like a poster.

Your little interaction was interrupted when Kunikida came raging towards you two with a file in his hands, hitting the both of you harshly and giving you two a quick scold.

Deep inside though, dazais heartbeat really fastened though that even he couldn't code it down.

A/N: idk if I should do more well written parts....

Divider creds: @cafekitsune

[spicyraeman]

busy couple of nights

[didisayso]

Jisung : there are a lot of things that people should do and shouldn't do

Minho : ok?

Jisung : with that in mind you should totally do me

Felix : bro is a rizzler

[kazcassette]

Im cooking.

[lostfanboyarts]

idk if you’re still taking polycule requests/like this ship so feel free to ignore but!! B2 tachihigugin?

This ship is delightful I adore it <33

[blue-thief]

why has dazai osamu been made into a hot anime boy FOUR TIMES??

[rohansdisciple]

BRO CHRISTOPHER 😧⁉️

i’m glad this was the first thing i saw when i woke up today 😮‍💨 .

[uzi-x33]

just a sketch for now but here’s emo/alt junichiro:33 and his bf w 0 rizz

[jeonsoyeoyon]

shit, the boys need me for the album, ill text you later 𝓳𝓪𝓰𝓲𝔂𝓪 ❤️