#straight. up. bawling. just bawling.

[yorshie]

Hey, Yorshie! Fun fact: I was the one who sent in the original prompt for Raph with the phrase "tell me it was a lie. tell me you're playing with me right now." You did SUCH a great job with it.

After deleting my reply to your other post, I kept thinking about it trying to remember exactly what my reply had been, and then I was like... hm. I'm gonna. I'm gonna write that, actually. So, here's a present for you Yorshie! My first ever reader-insert piece. (Obviously, feel free to delete/not post this if it's too... idk. Anything. I hope this is an okay thing to do.)

Another fun fact: the title in my gdoc is "Yorshie's Gift" lol <3

---

You would recognize the rumble of that motorcycle anywhere.

No one else had realized, yet, just how much danger you were all about to be in. The others were still hauling boxes into the back of the truck. Only you were frozen, hands hovering in the air above the box you’d been reaching for.

You needed to get everyone out of here fast. Most of these new recruits were just kids, barely out of high school. Searching for a sense of belonging, a sense of purpose, like you had when you first joined years ago. Every year there were more. Kids who had never believed they even had a chance at a future, kids who got caught up in the pretty lies and promises that the clan used to suck them in. You hated to see it happen, but there was really nothing you could do about it. You had agreed to lead this excursion, hoping at least that you could be there to ensure no one got hurt.

The rumble was getting louder.

You jerked up, hissing out an order to retreat. The others paused in their movements to look at you, surprised, and you felt a wave of frustration and terror constrict your lungs as they stared at you. 

Their hesitation would get them killed.

 “Move your ass!” You shoved the keys of the truck into the hands of the nearest member and pushed them toward the front. “Now!”

Thankfully, they started to scramble. Within seconds the truck peeled away, leaving behind at least half of the goods you had been ordered to secure. You really couldn’t fucking care less. You made sure the recruits who hadn’t been able to fit in the truck were headed toward safety, too, before starting to run.

And then you stopped.

The rumble was so loud, now, that you could almost feel the vibrations in your chest. He’d be here any second. You should run. You should run. The last words he’d spoken to you, weeks ago, echoed in your mind. 

“I’d better not see you again. If I do, my face is the last thing you’ll ever see, I can promise you that.”

You knew what you would be running from, but… what exactly were you running toward? More listless days with your mind lost in a haze of regret? More nights alone with your chest hollow and aching? Before him, you hadn’t even realized that you were just going through the motions of your life. And then you had found what you were looking for, after all this time. You had found that sense of belonging, that purpose that you had so desperately sought out when you were too young to know any better and you had turned to the foot clan. And when you’d found what you’d been looking for, it hadn’t even been something you found in the foot clan itself. You’d found it in their enemy.

Raphael.

Then you’d lost him. It was your own goddamn fault, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. The weeks since he’d found out had left you feeling untethered. Floating through the days, wondering what the fuck the point was, anyway. You hadn’t realized just how much he had changed your life, just how much he had changed you. And now, without him…

You didn’t want to run anymore.

A strange sense of finality settled over you. It’s what you deserved, anyway, wasn’t it? You were a criminal. No matter what circumstances had led you here, no matter how trapped you had felt… you were still a criminal. And you had still lied to him, for so long. 

And maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. For his face to be the last one you ever saw.

Tires squealed, pulling you from your thoughts, and then he was there. You watched him leap from his bike, sprinting down the alley straight toward you, and the adrenaline that burst through you reminded you that you should run. You were wearing your full gear, face covered by the mask that had been replaced after he’d crushed your old one in his hand. He didn’t even know it was you. You could still slip away into the shadows, you could still- 

You didn’t move. 

He was fast, faster than most people could even follow, but time seemed to slow as he approached. You could see the determination, the anger in his expression. In the tense set of his shoulders. But beneath that, there was a weary sadness. And despite the fear that was clawing its way up your throat, that sadness that you saw was what solidified your decision. 

An enormous fist, clenched around a sai, barrelled toward you, but you focused instead on Raphael’s face. The last face you’d ever see. So angry and tired and sad, and it looked like that because of you.

Yeah. You deserved this.

And the blow hit.

WWWWOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! OMG YOUR FIRST READER INSERT AND YOU SEND IT TO ME????? *crying* LET’s GO!!!

Wow! Your pacing is very good *trying not to cry* I was totally immersed *tears start falling* and the feeling! The feel- *breaks down sobbing* omg what if raph takes off the mask at the end OR DOESNT WHICH ONE IS WORSE!!!!???

*straight up bawling at this point* im fine! It’s just. It really hit me in the angst corner. Don’t mind me I’m just. Gonna slide along the floor in a little raccoon puddle.

But IT WAS A GOOD READ. IMMA READ IT AGAIN!!

Also! If you ever write for the turtles again, please tag me. I’d love to be in your tag list and I’d love to read it.

[geekiemire]

man that new boonboomger and new gavv...

[greenteabelle]

it's the silence he hates the most .

it's ironic , he supposes . philza has spent an eternity being alone , save for the few companions he's met and lost . this new family he gained a year ago shouldn't make things any different .

yet , it has .

now , when he wakes up , he seeks out the soft rustling and scampering as chayanne plays another round of hide and seek .

now , when he wakes up , he expects to hear the rattling of maracas as llulah impatiently hovers above him , waiting for him to awaken .

as they go about their day , philza is constantly surrounded by sounds .

crows cawing .

hummingbirds chirping .

leaves rustling .

doors opening .

but now . as he lays in bed , alone .

it's so quiet .

it's too quiet .

philza wants to close his eyes and pretend that everything is okay , but it's terrifying .

knowing that when he opens his eyes , it'll be to a world of silence .

it's ironic , how he comforted them as they said their goodbyes , when he's the one who can't let go .

how can he , when he promised that they wouldn't be apart again ?

it's not fair .

it's not fair .

he's tried so hard to keep the one family not born of war and chaos , the one family he's sworn to protect with his eternal life .

he failed them again .

again .

so now , he waits .

he waits for the darkness to consume him , and prays for a never-ending dream .

where they will all be together again .

[cranberrymoons]

.

[noobslayerarchetype11]

I tweak everytime my sense of thinking lands on this man. Because everytime, I lay a thought on him, all I remember is his devastating back story and when I remember that back story the background music in my head plays "Strangers" by Ethel Cain. (I will never shut up about this.)

"Electrical" by Bali Baby

"Brooklyn Blood Pop"

"Do I wanna know?" Arctic Monkeys

"Paranoid" Chase Atlantic

Assigning songs that matches Servamp characters because I am bored as freak, Part 1. (Guys give me song recommemdations that you think have Servamp vibes.

(I wanna cry.)

This man is the definition of "Written by DPR Ian" like look at him, his hair, his character, his tattoos bruh definitely "No Blueberries" vibes grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr anyways "Here" by Alessia Cara seems to match him too.

"Brooklyn Blood Pop"

"Electrical" by Bali Baby

Crawling back to YOU.

Do I wanna know?

If this feeling blows both ways?

Sad to see you go

Was sorta hoping that you'd stay

Baby we both know

That the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day.

Do I wanna know?

To busy being yours to fall

Sad to see you go

Ever thought of calling darling?

Do I wanna know?

Do you want me crawling back to you?

[oakfern]

why does consuming content destroy me. i am so bad at this. why can't i just read books and play video games like a normal person

[kiisuuumii]

you ever just stare at a tree for a lil bit too long and start crying

[gromky]

what a waste of army dreamers oh what a waste of army dreamers army dreamers army dreamers army drea

[abitofboth]

the best part of tabling at cons is the amount of nerds you get to chat shit with

[mainfaggot]

- couldn't sleep last night (took over an hour to fall asleep. I take sleep meds bc otherwise it would take 3 hours. goddamn)

- woke up 45 mins before my alarm bc of stress. couldn't fall back asleep

- wasted time talking to my mom and got to the bus stop late

- cried once bc my mom said something upsetting to me. cried again bc I was late to the bus stop.

- got to campus and couldn't find anywhere to sit for 25 mins bc everyone and their mom is here during the first 3 weeks of classes before they give up on pretending to be studious. #real studiers (the word is student i know.) like me get annoyed . #academia (-> likes suffering❤️ is bad at everything but reading, writing, and memorizing + and cant go into trades)

- not enough time to study the entire chapter for the class i missed last week (#fake studier. i am no better than the campus crowd of posers rn unfortunately) before the class i have at 1 pm

[turnedpalefromlackofsun]

list of things i can depend on to make me cry

feathers across the seasons

starscream's confession + sentence at the end of till all are one

shigechi's death in jojos

the director watching allison's last words on repeat until he died

[brettsgoldstein]

my parents trying to get me to talk abt my feelings drives me wild bc my mom will just tell me everyone feels that way and i need to clean my room and my dad will tell me to write abt it

[aria0fgold]

Remembering the days when I was such a fast reader I can read at least several stories in a single month cuz I loved reading so much and wouldn't put the story down once I started reading but then the Fire Nation™️ (The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller) attacked and I've never been the same since... I'm such a slow reader now cuz of it.

[strawberry-cowmilk]

never thought I'd cry so much at a scene in a show last time was at least 4 years ago omg

[swampndn]

Hee hee it's midnight, so imma drop a dear diary then reblog a bunch of stuff to bury it. So for those who make it through the random posts, enjoy an ounce of my vulernability.

So I burned medicine tonight, and I spoke to someone I've not been speaking to because I didn't feel ready. And the sheer amount of information I got was beyond overwhelming. I would just go into it here, but there are folks irl that I should talk to about them first when it's time.

I will share one little thing, though. One of the things I was told to do was have a commemoration day. Other folks earth-side have said the same thing too. WELL, after being kind of drawn to a specific day, I got the very clear affirmation that it's on the 22nd.

Growing up, people would ask what my favorite number was, and I just kept picking 2. That's it. Just lil ol 2. And I know this is probably silly or delulu, as the kids say, but it felt really comforting getting the 22nd. I'm not one of those that is like everything happens for a reason, because I don't think Creator has us go through awful things to "teach us some lesson". However, something as small as that does make me think that Creator does give us little things to signal that while shit is shitty, the love and care and intention all of our ancestors prayed for us persists through it all.

Omg look at me transitioning from my mean auntie NDN into whatever gentle soft NDN shit this is

[dooplissss]

god i keep remembering i'm going to see into the spider-verse with a live orchestra next month and i'm already pre-crying, i'm going to sob the whole time orchestras make me so insane i love it