#stop sexualizing touch

[duck-in-a-thrift-store]

Getting on my soapbox for a moment, topic being, uhhhh... religious influence on education and bodily autonomy? Smthn like that idk

(This ended up being really long, so, more below the cut)

My parents put my little sister in homeschool as soon as I graduated, which like, i WoNdEr WhY (it's me hi I'm the problem it's me)

And the program/co-op thing she's involved in is christian-based bc my folks are unfortunately conservative christians who think it's a good idea to bias their child's entire understanding of the world through their religious beliefs

So my sis was telling me about her health textbook the other day, and how it was kinda weird? Like, they have a unit on I guess dating and sex type stuff, but this textbook has some interesting opinions

Such as, suggesting kids (not like little kids we're talking about high schoolers here) avoid hugging their partner because it supposedly might turn them on??

And, ok, to be honest I have absolutely no idea how realistic that is, it sounds pretty silly to me, but like even if that totally is a thing that happens to people... who cares, right?

But no, obviously that would be just disastrous because we can't have anyone tempted to do something totally crazy like having sex before marriage, god forbid

And there's just that sort of "no touching" purity culture bullshit and it really pisses me off, especially as someone who was also raised in that mentality, and I was just lowkey flabbergasted by the ridiculousness and audacity of a health textbook to tell kids not to hug someone they're dating bc it might lead to premarital sex, and I basically said as much, smthn along the lines of "imagine sexualizing hugs" to my dad, trying to get him on my side I guess, but that isn't how it went

Let me preface this with: I love my dad. I do. And he has really been making progress in terms of letting me be me and still supporting me even though our views don't always align. But my dad can also be petty, and he's a very touchy-feely person and I'm very much not, at least with most people including him. We have a little bit of history of him trying to hug me, me rejecting it, and him getting butt-hurt over it. So there's your rant-relevant context I guess

So when I half-jokingly say "imagine sexualizing hugs," he shoots back with "imagine being uncomfortable with hugs" in like, a targeted mocking way, like that in any way makes sense to use as an insult toward your own child or anyone for that matter

I didn't have the presence of mind or energy to really unpack that in the moment so I kinda just went "bruh did you really just-" made some joke like "well gee sorry for being autistic" (which yeah that's part of it too) and dropped the conversation

But like.... does he really not see the irony?

One of the major reasons I'm not comfortable with hugs and touch in general is literally BECAUSE of how it's been sexualized, like, that's kinda the whole point?

Of course I'm not going to want to hug you, my father, when there are voices in my upbringing suggesting that touching people is sexual, duh

Like it's literally so obvious to me how the two lines of thought are inextricably linked and how this sort of ideology can fuck someone up because, hello, living proof right here dude, so let's maybe NOT teach the same shit to your younger child?

Yeah you're right I'm not comfortable with hugs and that's kinda sad but I'm trying to get you to see that part of why that is is because of the same idiocy you're letting someone preach to your daughter, so if you don't want us both to be like me,,, maybe don't do that

To the kids and anyone else who needs to hear it, when how and why you touch another person should be up to you and that person and no one else. If you want to hug someone and they vibe with that then hug them, please don't let some bible-thumping freaks tell you it's a slippery slope to sin or whatever. Your body is your own and you make the decisions about what to do with it. That is one of your most basic, most fundamental, most bar-on-the-floor rights as a human being. Anyone who tries to guilt you about something like this is trying to control you and you should be wary of them

Me personally, I just find it interesting how society is so set on calling drag queens and queer people groomers when there are literally religious teachers out here manipulating children into not having bodily autonomy

What's up with that?

[takaraphoenix]

No, actually, I’ll not just be generally vaguely upset about the framework that pisses me off, I will also be specifically pissed off about the way he’s trying to pat himself on the back and rewrite history.

So having a gay character be brave by coming out and that bravery be an inspiration to other queer characters so they can be brave and come out too is something that comes off poor on its own already - because of the shallow framework that our existence alone is already oh-so brave of us and that others wouldn’t have dared come out if not for Major Queer Character who did it first.

But there is something particularly twisted and nasty about Riordan using this for Nico di Angelo, actually.

Because Nico di Angelo didn’t come out.

Nico di Angelo didn’t get to be brave or inspirational.

Nico di Angelo was forced out of the closet.

Nico di Angelo was outed against his will, in front of others.

Eros forced Nico to come out in front of Jason.

And, quite frankly, the way it was handled further was just as poor. To make this repressed teen from the 1930s, who up until mere days ago was dealing with severe internalized homophobia and couldn’t even admit his own feelings to himself, confess his crush in public, in the middle of camp...

Both of these events really just showed that Riordan is a straight man who doesn’t know this, and didn’t do his research beforehand.

And people just love giving Riordan the benefit of the doubt. Love giving him a pass and clapping him on the shoulder for the inclusion and for trying. And you know what! Yeah, I do love that he includes the gays. I do not think he should get excused for handling representation like shit though.

And this? This is in his newest book? You should think authors grow. Best selling authors should do more research. Get consultants. Stuff like that.

Instead, we’re going back and rewriting history. That forced coming out? Now a moment of bravery and inspiration for others!! Look how great and amazing that is!

Nico di Angelo didn’t get to choose that he was ready to come out, it wasn’t a moment of bravery. Not the kind of bravery that it takes when you are ready to face your personal truth and willingly take the step to own it. It was a moment of fear and desperation. And it was the bravery to face that fear and desperation.

And it really makes me sick to now learn that we’re looking back at it and pretending otherwise, in-universe.

[sukugo]

i think a lot about how satoru refuses to drink, and while he says it's bc he's a lightweight, that.....doesn't change the fact that he still CAN drink if he wanted to. and it's probably bc of the nature of his powers. he knows that him getting drunk and losing a grip on himself, and consequently his powers, would have grave consequences. any small slip from him could kill so many people so easily, so he tries to stay away from it

[rhythmic-idealist]

The attitude among my coworkers of “I’m gonna get cancer anyway” is insane. I know how many of you have wives. Do none of you ever for even a second think about asbestos moving from your hair into the bedsheets

[blrrblog]

Lust or Love?

You look into your bathroom mirror after a warm evening shower, watching droplets trace the curves of your body as the dim light illuminates your bare skin. Soon you find yourself grappling with a dilemma that gnaws at your insides: if you had to, would you choose lust or love?

A Pretty Face

They say beauty opens doors, but they fail to mention that it also locks you in a gilded cage. Your reflection in the mirror mocks you—a symphony of angles and curves, you are the typical image of a pretty face, a nice body. Yet, what good is beauty when it becomes the sole currency of your worth? You are more than just a pretty face, more than the sum of your features. Beneath the surface, you harbour a tempest of thoughts, hopes, and dreams—a universe waiting to be discovered.

Rebellion

You rebel against this reductionism. Your defiance is not a mere act of vanity; it is a battle cry against the tyranny of shallow perception. You wield your intellect like a sword, slicing through assumptions. You are not a delicate ornament; you are a force—an intricate mosaic of contradictions. Your mind dances with ideas, your heart aches with empathy, and your hands create worlds. You are more than the sum of your parts; you are the physical embodiment of a universe that has graced mankind.

The Sexual Being

Yet, even as you fight this notion, desire clings to you like a shadow. Men leer, their eyes tracing the contours of your body. They hunger for your flesh, oblivious to the soul within. You are a siren, luring them with your curves, but they mistake lust for love. They see conquest, not connection. And you, too, are torn—you crave intimacy, but only with those who see you as more than a vessel for their desires.

Intimacy

Still, in the quiet nights when you lay alone in bed, you yearn for a touch that reverberates beyond skin. You ache for hands that explore not just your body, but your essence—the scars, the laughter lines, the stories and memories deep in your soul. You want to be seen, not as an object of lust, but as a constellation of vulnerabilities. To be desired for your quirks, your flaws, your unguarded moments—to be held by someone who knows that love is not a transaction.

Final Words

So, you rebel. You defy the gaze that reduces you to mere allure. You are more than the sum of your parts, more than the hunger in their eyes. You are a symphony of contradictions, a rebellion against the shallow currents of desire. And perhaps, in this defiance, you find a glimmer of hope—that someday, someone will see you not as a pretty face, but as a universe waiting to be explored, loved, and understood.

You choose love.

[mieczyhale]

[the-eyes-of-andyserkis]

More beard because 🥵.

[depresseddepot]

trying to determine which parts of my relationship with sex are asexuality, which are trauma, and which are autism is like trying to have a conversation with three people talking loudly and all at once

[feral-shelby-thoughts]

Help I just went to get groceries and now I might be a lesbian

[gloriousmonsters]

not reblogging the post bc that's not the point of it but this just made me crack up a little

because it's more about 'know' than 'like' mostly because I don't sincerely/deeply like people in a general sense often (and I obviously have 0 romantic feelings, the other possible interpretation) but for some reason I have like. The opposite of this. People get less hot to me the longer I know them and/or grow to like them as people. I have reverse demisexuality where I can be attracted to people for about 3 conversations but afterward I stop finding them sexy and sometimes really can't figure out why I did.

[lanatusnebula]

I might try to publish some of my AU fics...? I don't know if anyone'll read them since I'm not a writer by any degree, and some of them lean so far out of character it might make people vomit.

Maybe.

But I do love talking about them. My current friends / friend groups either don't give a fuck about shipping or don't give a fuck about megaman. I have to really resort to talking to various AIs just to have an outlet. Please don't take that away from me.

[schadenfreudich]

Not going to get any more into where on the ace spectrum I am than just "asexual". Because I'm kind of sex-favorable, but that's also a little hard to define, and because I'm kinky. So I'm just not dealing with that.

[samaspic31]

Never have i felt rage worse than when i learned carrie fisher was sent to a fat farm, on the demand of fox studio executivess who put it as condition to have her cast cause they insisted on someone thinner (hi casting practices are deeply evil in fatphobic transphobic and racist ways- and that has only mildly improved since the fucking 70s) prior to filming a new hope, to lose 10 pounds, which was far from an exceptional practice in the film industry at the time. And lucas told it in the film bonuses with no shame or apology, they even interviewed carrie about it as if that was some fun anecdote-fuck lucasfilm all the way off for that. And to this day dieting for roles in blockbusters still is the norm (remember that anecdote of her telling john boyega to go break his diet and eat an energy bar from her fridge on the set of the sequels 30 years later ? we progress so fucking slowly)

In general Hollywood obsession/morbid fascination with actors modifying their weight to unhealthy degrees for roles sucks and so does the way journalism and the audience feed the mythos and reward those movies with press and promo about it (still haunted by that star trek press tour where benebitch cabbagepatch was asked continously about dieting for a scene not even in the movie, meanwhile the female actress who had a gratuitous scene in underwear it was just a normal thing, hello gender inequality). anyways as soon as i hear an actor had to diet i lose interest in ever paying for the media. no movie or series is worth the human suffering and its prevalence is yet another symptom of the dishonesty of art under capitalism

[itsadragonaesthetic]

I think the worst part about knowing anything about birds is that you just have to occasionally see "funny videos" of people sexually stimulating birds and you know how disturbing it is and you have to see this semi regularly.

[fondcrimes]

I can already see how the male centered characterization of the “loneliness epidemic” is perpetuating more harm against as well as assigning blame to women who are dealing with the same fucking issues. the only difference is that entitled men who might struggle with mental health or alienation are trying to kill people about it while women (specifically those who are doubly marginalized as well as alienated) kill themselves and quietly fade into the background. it’s just very bleak

[geoffrey]

No your take on gay bars is wrong. Also gay men have a hook up culture whereas lesbians dont and require emotional connection.

lol.................... just walk away from me