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namirastar · 5 years ago

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A meteor shower

Pairing: Analogical

Authors note: Sorry if its a little longer than most stuff i write or if it comes off as weird, I wanted to do a warmup but went on for much longer than expected. Hope you enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~

Once Virgil heard the satisfying ‘click’ he knew Logan was done setting up the telescope, now if only he could get the same done with his tripod.

“Would you like some assistance Virge?”

He chuckled a bit, the dork sure loved to help. “Yes please.” And Virgil always appreciated it.

“If only using a tripod was just as easy as a camera...” Virgil muttered eliciting a soft smile from his friend. “Don’t be too hard on yourself, this is only first time using one, correct?”

“Well technically second since i tested it at home today...” and there was the same satisfying click as before.

“Looks like we’re ready now.” Logan stood upright again and Virgil stretched a bit looking over at Logan.

“Even if it was my second try, i don’t think you’ve ever set up a tripod yet you managed to make it work in less than a minute!”

Logan looked at him a little surprised by the compliment and averted his eyes, his cheeks may or may not have been a bit red but nobody could tell in the dark of the night.

“Well it’s... nothing really. I’ve set up my telescope hundreds of times and it uses a pretty similar mechanic to your tripod to make it stand so it makes sense that I could set it up quickly.”

Now it was Virgil’s turn to smile softly at the nerd in front of him, oh how cute he is when he gets all shy like that. Virgil quickly shook that thought out of his head, beginning to blush a bit and turned his attention to the sky.

“So uh... when’s the meteor shower supposed to begin? I kinda need to set my camera’s timer up.”

“Oh right!” Logan said as he glanced down at his clock. “We have exactly 5 minutes and 18 seconds.”

Virgil chuckled a bit turning to his camera and setting the timer, “I guess I’ll set it to 6 minutes then...” ‘Such an extra and nerdy dork’ he thought fondly.

Then he turned back to Logan to see him looking through the telescope, perhaps adjusting the height and where its been pointed which reminded Virgil to do the same for his camera.

~~~~~~~

“One minute left!” Said Logan as he looked at his watch. He was going to be counting down the remaining seconds in his head if it weren’t for Virgil clearing his throat. He then turned his head over to the emo who was rubbing the back of his neck, looking quite bashful.

“Hey uh... thanks for joining me Lo... I don’t think I would’ve come out here to do this if I was on my own...”

Logan smiled fondly at his friend and said “No need to thank me, I was already looking for a reason to see this myself.” It also worked out well for Logan as he had always wondered what it would be like to stargaze with Virgil though he wouldn’t admit it.

Virgil smiled back at him and Logan felt the need to look away to hide the blush on his face and so he turned his attention to the sky.

“Oh, it has begun.”

The sky had lit up with the spectacle and the boys watched on in awe. The shower was to last several hours yet they watched on for several minutes. They hadn’t even noticed Virgil’s camera going off, oblivious to everything but the sky.

When they finally looked away they turned towards each other. Virgil giggled a bit at how cliche the whole scene was, making Logan blush again only this time it was visible to Virge but that wasn’t important to him as...

“I haven’t even used the telescope yet!” with that he made a move towards the telescope when he had another thought.

“Virgil... have you ever used a telescope?” Virgil looked back over and with the shake of his head Logan had another fond smile on his face “Would you like to try?”

He smiled back and made his way towards the telescope, “Sure” He knew to close and eye and look through the hole and Logan felt himself smile at the growing smile on Virgil’s lips.

Standing upright he turned to him, “Thanks, that was pretty cool!”

Logan, now very aware of both the sincere thanks as well as how close the other’s smile was, turned away and distracted himself by looking through the telescope instead.

“Uh... no need to thank me V, it’s-it’s only common courtesy after all...” he felt his cheeks begin to burn as he processed the moment and inwardly cursed himself for stuttering.

And with that the boys went to work, Virgil had flipped through the pictures he got and then began taking some on his own as Logan observed and occasionally took notes, it was quiet but peaceful as both went about their own side projects.

Then as he was gazing through the telescope he heard Virgil speak up all of a sudden, “Hey, don’t move right now ok?” followed by the sound of his camera shutter. “Ok you can move now.” The boy looked over towards his friend as he scrolls through his pictures.

“Sorry if you didn’t want your picture taken, it’s just...” he paused for a moment to take a breath. “...it would’ve been weird to come out all this way and not take a picture of the most beautiful star there is.” Virgil let out an awkward laugh, “Sorry it was just perfect, sorry!” But there was no response from Logan, he just stood there completely caught off guard.

Virgil, now visibly nervous, ran over to his friend with his camera and showed him the image, “Hey uh, how do you think it turned out? I managed to capture the shower as well so it looks pretty cool i think.” The picture really did look gorgeous, you could only see the silhouette of the boy and the telescope with the focus being the sky yet it fit in perfectly.

“Yes it’s quite beautiful.” Logan looked back at him, seemingly having forgotten the comment and the photographer let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding in.

“By the way... if you didnt want an image taken i’ll delete it for you.”

“Oh there’s no need,” Another warm glance, “It’s perfectly fine by me.”

They then started flipping through the photos that he had taken. Some of the ones taken by the tripod were a bit unfocused whereas some looked perfect. Of those the boy took on his own, they were all beautiful and looked professionally taken.

“These are absolutely stunning Virgil, you’ve outdone yourself tonight!” He exclaimed. Feeling a little flustered he tugged at the end of his hoodie.

“It’s nothing really, they’re not even ready for the news or my blog!” The boy took a hold of his camera again “I still have to edit them so the meteor shower pops out more...”

“While I do agree you can always improve you shouldn’t push yourself down. Talking yourself down can harm the creative process in several ways and do believe me when i say you’ve done good as you are aware I’m not one to metaphorically sugarcoat any critique i give.”

Virgil took in a deep breathe as he felt the heat once again rise to his ears but quickly giggled, drawing Logan’s attention away from it.

“Alright, I’ll stop if you stop!” The emo said with a smirk.”Deal?” He winked at the boy in front of him causing said boy’s heart to skip a beat. ‘When had the anxious boy gotten so comfortable’ he wondered to himself but wouldn’t dare question it. He needed as much support as he could get tonight.

The man in front of him smirked back “Touche.” and grabbed his hand firmly, shaking it. “Deal.”

And there was the anxious boy again, who thought he couldn’t get a better moment and continued to hold the boy’s hand far after the handshake should’ve been over.

“V, is everything all right?” He met Logan’s eyes and could tell by just a glance that he was both confused and concerned.

“I um... Do you know why I asked you to come with me?”

He watched wide eyes blink in confusion and glance off in another direction. “Wasn’t it because you wanted company and I have a tendency to stargaze.”

The response made Virgil chuckle a bit, ‘analytical as always’ and calmed his racing heartbeat with another deep breath. “Well that does help but those aren’t the only reasons you know like i said...” They locked eyes. “If you hadn’t come then I would have picked another topic or something, not plan out an outing to an open field like this at least.”

The bespectacled boy now was even more confused. Was it not due to the fear of being out on your own at midnight? Then why?

Meanwhile Virgil attempted smiling as casually as he could but it was evident he too was nervous. “You- you see...” He took another steadying breath and decided to grab the boy’s other hand as well. “I wanted to tell you something..”

He focused back at his friend once again who was smiling at him lightly, “What is it Virgil?”

“I-I..” An inhale and exhale could be heard once again “I really.. like you Logan, uh romantically I mean.”

He had kept his gaze on Logan’s face until it finally showed a sign of shock to which he let go of his hands, looked away and braced himself for the worst but then;

“Am I... free to hug you?” Locking eyes again Logan was staring back at him looking nervous himself but the warmth and adoration radiating from his eyes said it all. Virgil happily flung himself into the arms of his new partner.

#analogical #sanders sides #sanders side fic #nami writes #photography #meteor shower #logan sanders #virgil sanders

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myvideosscripts-blog · 6 years ago

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ONISION'S ACCUSATIONS DEBUNKED + RECEIPTS

Hello everyone, and before you make a comment on the sound, consider not doing that and reading the description box first and I am aware that my videos are low quality. Please understand that this is what I do in my spare time, it's not my job and I don't have the kind of time Greg has to dedicate to my channels, I actually take care of my family. Thank you and remember to reach out on my social medias down below if you wish, just give me a little request! Let's begin (and if you already know everyone involved please just skip to the time stamp where I debunk Greg's accusations against Madison and Ayalla: 10:30

Greg has struck again. I have a few videos on the back burner because this dude just wants to dig himself a hole so deep, he's about to go straight through the earth's crust and hit the mantle. The video we are debunking today is Greg's attempt to smear those who are coming forward with accusations about how absolutely trash he is.

Before we dissect and debunk his video I think we should take a look at the history of each party involved. For the sake of continuity, I'll be referring to Kai (formerly known as Lainey and Taylor, and I think even Eli at one point) as Lainey and I will be using they/their pronouns. I also want to address comments I made about Lainey changing their mind on... everything, because they do. That's no excuse for me to question their gender and I deeply apologize for that. There's no excuse for that and I won't attempt to make one.

We'll start with the largest figure in all of this. Onision, also known as Greg and more recently "character" but because nothing out of his mouth is blatantly fact, nor opinion, nor joke, we'll refer to him by his biological given name, Greg. Remember how I said in my last Greg video regarding the allegations that he is both technical and metaphorical when it suits his narrative. Keep that in mind throughout this video. It's very important.

To keep things as brief as possible while also hitting the main points, Greg has always been problematic on youtube. These days he chalks it up to being a jokester and everyone else just not getting it. Sure, Greg. He has a history with younger girls and publicizing his relationships, and exploiting his "personal experiences" and those involved, whilst getting upset if the other party does the same, these are facts. Forums like lolcow and kiwifarms and Greg himself have documented this. Greg has also exploited his own drama, claiming to want to squash things to garner sympathy from his audiences and the skeptics among us. He has ALLEGEDLY rated inappropriate photos of underage girls on his forum... I'll be using that word, allegedly quite a bit in this video. He has allegedly coerced women into having sex with him. He has allegedly harassed women via text, phone call, twitter, video - women whom are either easy targets, like Eugenia Cooney who I've voiced my opinion on, Jaclyn Glenn whom is staying neutral and/or not voicing her opinion on the current situation (as of right now), Shiloh who was "too much to handle" but also was so underage at the time that he ALLEGEDLY drove her across the country so that he could legally consummate their relationship. Speaking of which, according to this 2017 twitter interaction, Greg seemingly replies to Billie saying "I'm not a liar or a criminal. I'd take 1 person like me over 100 like you any day. You got dumped, again, you can leave now." To which Ayalla, another big part of this, replies, "this coming from the man who told Billie to shave her head and get a tattoo that says, "I'm a liar" to prove herself". Thanks to tumblr I found the following screenshots. Shiloh said on her blogspot that shaving off the rest of her hair caused her to become depressed and that her femaleness had been stripped from her completely. In the next screenshot (which looks like a wiki article) it reads: "On June 30th, 2011, Shiloh uploaded a video titled "BALD!!!" to one of her channels to announce her newly full shaved head. Throughout the rest of their relationship she dyed her short hair different colors and wore wigs. This did not cause controversy until later when Shiloh revealed more of her side of the relationship on her tumblr. She claims that Greg forced her to shave her head and told her, "I want you to shave your head cause you're a good bitch." She says he took her into the bathroom and shaved her head. She says she felt ugly and de-feminized because of it. Could it be a coincidence? Sure, suuure. There are a plethora of details I could go into to make this an hour long video to absolute kill my computer, but rather than doing that, just comment with anything you'd like me to cover and I'll do my best to do that. Until then, explore the rabbit hole that the internet has to offer about this.

Next, let's explore Lainey. Lainey has been at the center of quite a few controversies mostly due to their proximity to Greg. Lainey is 24 years old and claims that Greg and them started dating February 7th 2012, however the article on their wikia page, states that they were married in November 2011, so that's a little conflicting. That would mean they married Greg when they were around 16 years old and Greg was 25. When they met, Lainey had a striking resemblance to Shane Dawson, a particular obsession of Greg's, however that could be attributed to Lainey's scene/emo phase... and not any pressure from Greg to look like a guy he kissed and has since made numerous accusations about. Lainey specificly said in a livestream with Sarah that they were Sarah's guardian, which makes this entire situation a little messed up. I can speculate the Lainey Sarah relationship, but I'll save that for another time. The last thing I'll mention is that Lainey has made numerous tweets using slurs that I won't repeat.

There's an interesting timeline on reddit regarding Greg and Lainey, which I'll leave in the description if you want to dive a little deeper into those two. And though Lainey is an adult therefore fully accountable, I have a little more sympathy for them, despite their seemingly blind loyalty towards Greg. Lainey is complicit in everything that has happened in the house of horrors. At 24 years old, that needs to change or you need to be ok with the drama channels calling you out.

Next in this is Sarah, who was a long-time fan of Lainey. I need to correct myself in saying that Sarah was actually 14 when she and Lainey interacted, but was 16 years old upon meeting in person, which strikes me as odd, especially given that Greg has used the age of consent technicality before and how 16 years old is the age of consent in Washington. It's a little odd to me. Sarah was allegedly having... home trouble when she joined the household. There's been a lot of vague alluding to... well... abuse, it seems. Despite the fact that Sarah might be mature for her age, she still was only 14 years old when they interacted vs Lainey's 20 years old, a 6 year age gap. There's been a bit of drama with her online, like confusion about her mental disorder (borderline, not bipolar - apparently those two still get confused). Sarah used to confide in Lane, and frequently ask her to delete texts. During a livestream with Sarah and Lainey, when the first grooming accusations came out a couple years ago, Lane watched the broadcast and both Sarah and Lainey allegedly "freaked out" on Lane. For the record, Lane had no direct contact with Greg and Lainey, and there was nothing beyond brief twitter interactions between Lane and Lainey.

Next we have Madison who was strictly friends with Greg and Lainey, and states to have only ever had platonic feelings for the both of them. But given that Greg has accused her of inappropriate conversation and over-staying her welcome at Greg's house of horrors, and Greg's history with rejection... the following information is not so surprising, but keep in mind we're seeing things from a very limited scope. Madison and Greg were friends for just a few years shy of a decade when she found out she was blocked, to her it was out of nowhere. But there could have been discussions between Greg and Lainey about how one or the other felt uncomfortable, and since Greg is a manipulator, he may have even told Lainey half-truths about Madison, and their interactions. The only reasonable explanation for being blocked was that she had made a video explaining to her audience that Greg's DDlg video was done preemptively on his part with cruel intentions behind it, and/or misleading her to make the uncomfortable video. She clearly states, and I've never seen him actually deny it, that Greg brought up the idea of doing his usual diaper bs, and she could actually explain and give context behind the kink (although if kink isn't the correct term in this case, please let me know in the comments). There's also been some controversy with her making a statement against Greg, retracting the statement and apologizing for it, and lashing out at RSN for inciting drama.

The last player in this situation is Ayalla, easily the most consistent and honest out of everyone here. Ayalla is a musician here on youtube who was introduced to Lainey and Greg through Billie and Social Repose - the former is her best friend and the latter being her now ex. Her previous experiences with Greg and Lainey have not been positive - having resorted to posting a cease and desist against Greg when he wouldn't stop posting about her, which makes one of his recent videos all the more... ugh gross.

With all that said, we're going to thoroughly debunk this video made alleging that Ayalla and Madison are creeps. Bear in mind, he is attempting to discredit them after these allegations came out to sway his audience and any skeptics watching that they are not credible sources.

It starts off saying "the truth will set you free", which probably should say "the truth will send greg to jail or at the very least to the authorities possibly resulting in having to register as a sex offender, so why not make a video making allegations against those brave enough to speak out against greg and lainey's inappropriate and immoral behaviour (if not blatantly illegal... allegedly)"

The next slide is a screengrab of Madison with the caption "Onision ended his friendship with this girl for repeatedly trying to be in a relationship with him and his spouse despite him having no interest in her, cheating on her boyfriend with his boss at Fred Meyer and going behind Onision's back to trash talk him all while pretending to be his friend". I haven't seen the deleted tweets that Madison made with regards to her and Greg's friendship ending and I can't find them (though if you have access of them, feel free to leave a comment of the link below or DM me on instagram or twitter, all links are in my bio). Madison has gone on stream herself to debunk this, and Lainey has also made statements about this situation. The statement that has absolutely zero proof is that Madison tried to be in a relationship with either of them, and she has vehemently denied those claims. Greg mentions that his zero interest has to do with the cheating and gives details, but Madison herself has stated that her now fiance is her daughter's father. Bringing up specific details like that, repeatedly, is a diversion tactic so that his viewer will hopefully not think twice to ask for the evidence. Whether or not she cheated on anyone is irrelevant in this video.

Next, it reads: "Not long after Onision cut ties with her she decided to connect with a girl who cheated on Onision and gather dirt from the very same girl Onision dumped for cheating on him." The amount of exes Greg claims to have, also who he claims cheated on him, is such a large number that Madison could walk down the street and bump into anyone who he says he dated. She's allowed to befriend others, especially given that she was hurt by the random ending of said friendship. And if Madison had made them feel uncomfortable, either of them could have voiced that instead of coming up with this elaborate story of all the terrible things she did while never taking responsibility for their own actions. Greg is incapable of doing that, but Lainey gives half-hearted, almost disingenous apologies for any of their wrong-doing.

Next the slide reads, "Onision and his ex started dating legally, consentually, however this girl lied to everyone and told everyone that Onision had dated her when she was younger than the age she was. And here are the receipts." Notice how Greg is not naming this person at all. The receipts he shows, are between him and Madison and this seems to be about the clip of her and BillytheFridge about Greg's alleged interactions with underage girls. Greg is blue, Madison is white. I'll do my best Greg voice for you all.

It's dated Saturday December 29, 2018, just last month. Greg says "Unfortunately we're going to have to sue you for slander. Best of luck to you." Madison replies, "Okay. I will press charges for this then." And Greg replies, "For?" The next message is a screenshot or document that says Washington Wiretapping Laws, and I'll provide the larger image which states that Washington is a two-party consent state. In his next message he says, "Like I said, there is no recording of your voice without consent." He sends a separate message a minute later saying, "We are going to have to sue you however, as there is a recording of you publicly slandering me." She never outright slandered him, she questioned his motives and stated some simple facts.

Madison responds, "You stated out loud, verbally to me that you were presently recording me. If you deleted it then great. But you verbally stated to me on the phone call you were recording me." Directly after, and her message was cut off in the screenshot, she says, "Be my guest. I don't have a fn dime. So you won't get anything out of it but paying for your own legal fees. And what I said wasn't untrue." Greg replied, "You were informed on the phone that you were wrong about Shiloh's age. You need to publicly state that." He never actually denies verbally telling her he was recording her, he just says that there isn't a recording. As for Shiloh's age... when they started recording videos together, Greg was 24-25 and Shiloh was 17, there's been speculation that Greg was talking to Shiloh while he was still married to Skye. There's a lot of conflicting information regarding when Lainey and Greg got together. I remember reading somewhere that Lainey was 15 when they first started talking, there are texts between the two that state they were 16 when Greg asked them about being his soulmate. In 2012 they were already married.

Moving on, he says, "You also implied I was a pedophile, you need to retract that statement as well. Otherwise we have to sue. It is our only option." I do find it interesting that just a couple days after the stream where she had made the comments, and RSN made the video with all of the clips, Greg texts her. I can definitely see where it looks like Madison has inside information on Greg. The general consensus is that she's afraid of Greg and that's why she retracted her statement, flippantly saying it was a poor choice of words, however I believe if she does have information about him and underage girls, she should join the other brave people who have come forward and say something. With the recent wetland situation, which fines are up to 10s of thousands of dollars, and given that Greg complains about his finances, and he even stated that he was using the money from his bogus gofundme for a forum (rather than paying himself, if he's so financially stable), it's safe to assume that Greg does not have the money to pay a lawyer and court fees in order to sue anyone. Don't be afraid to tell the truth. Stand by your convictions.

Madison replies to his message saying "I'll speak to Shiloh and I'll say what ends up being the truth. If I was wrong I will happily state that. I already publicly retracted the statement regarding you being a pedophile. Multiple times. But have you retracted yours regarding Shane? No. Have you retracted your comments regarding me being a sexual predator toward you or your family? No. You have not."

Greg responds "Please watch the documentary I made on Shane. It proves your wrong. Also I never called you a sexual predator. You are wrong about that as well." In this text we're seeing technical Greg. He implied many times that Madison made his family feel uncomfortable, that she overstayed her welcome, etc. Though I think it's a jump to use the word sexual predator, I can understand why Madison would feel that way. Technically he didn't call her that. His Shane Dawson "documentary" had no clear point, but even if she wasn't refering to that, Greg has made a lot of statements against Shane Dawson.

Madison replies, "You want me to dig out the texts you decided to publicly tweet about me?" I think those are deleted now by the way, but with Greg's audience, it doesn't matter if they're deleted, the damage is done.

Greg's reply is, "ALso why would you be in contact with a self-admitted pathological liar (my ex of over 7 years ago)? Do you not see how weird and inappropriate that is? I broke up with her for cheating on me, then I end your and my friendship/refuse to work with you, and this is what you do?" He makes a few more messages, but this one speaks volumes because it looks as though he is trying to make her out to be the bad person when he's been accused of something. Classic deflecting Greg.

The next three texts say, "Like I said, I never called you what you say I did. However I do have proof you slandered me, heavily. Retract, completely or we sue. And you need to retract it on the same place you accused me. On both the Drunken Peasants and wherever else you wrongly acused me." That was at 1:28pm. At 4:11pm Madison's response to him is cut off which says "Do not contact me again." So if there's anything in between those messages, Greg hasn't show us.

Greg reponds to her, "Expect to hear from my lawyer."

Madison says, "I retracted the statement you requested me to retract. Do not contact me again." But that's not good enough for Greg, and this next text of his shows us the controlling nature behind this "man". He says, "Unless you completely retracted your implication that I was ever with a 16 year old and also retracted your implication that you believe I am a pedophile on both The Drunken Peasants & Twitter (as well as anywhere else you said it) I will still be pursuing you legally, making an example out of people" (and it cuts off, but we can assume what it says). The words Greg chooses to use speaks volumes. Unless you do this, I'm gonna do that - whereas she already retracted what she needed to saying that it was a poor choice of words. Her opinion is not something that she legally needs to change. She can believe he's a pedo all she wants. We can believe that shady stuff goes on in the House of Horrors all we want. You can't sue someone for having an belief or opinion.

Next slide is where he highlights the message from her and uses the caption, "She made a public false claim about Onision, and admits it was false. Yet the damage is done. People continue to believe her lies, despite the fact she admitted she did not tell the truth." Once again, the use of his words speaks volumes. He always stresses the words honest and truth. As for the damage being done, the same can be said about his implications and accusations against Shane Dawson. Shane actually has the money and the means to sue Greg for the malicious things Greg has said about Shane. But it only counts if Greg is in that position, right?

The next slide is what Greg probably thinks is an unflattering photo of Ayalla. You could google a better image of her, but Greg uses this tactic that we see so often in the news and media of using unflattering images of people to paint them in a negative light. The caption reads, "This is the ex girlfriend of Social Repose. Onision defended her when she was being blackmailed by Social Repose. She is also the friend of Onision's ex girlfriend, who Onision dumped repeatedly for lying, cheating, and illegal drug use." Greg once again attempts to put himself on a pedestal by saying he defended someone, whilst also victimizing himself claiming that Billie lied, cheated, and participated in illegal activity. Which is interesting given that by all accounts, Greg himself is a criminal. In true Onision fashion, let's go over the definition of criminal: Criminal. noun. 1. a personal who has committed a crime. Destroying wetlands is a crime. Also, Greg is a cheater as well, considering he continued his relationship, or at least attempted to, with Billie, the person he refers to in this, while Lainey was taking care of their kids.

Next he says, "This girl claims that Sarah, a girl Onision and Laineybot first met in person when she was 16 and were only friends (and remained just friends even after she turned 18) "groomed" the girl." He conveniently left out the fact that Lainey was in contact with Sarah when she was as young as 14 years old. Lainey was 21 at the time. If it was a cis-man in contact with a 14 year old girl, it would be considered disgusting and creepy, so how about we toss out the double standards and call it like it is.

Moving on, in the next slide Greg mentions everything he did for Ayalla as though that has any bearing in the situation... especially since it was years ago. Notice that this is one of Greg's favorite tactics making him seem like a caring, good guy. It reads, "This girl spent about a week total around Onision, free housing, free meals, collaborating in videos, free plane ticket paid for by Onision, and knows for a fact we never did not do anything inappropriate with Sarah. In fact she knows very well that I (Onision) was often mean to Sarah. Which I have since apologized for."

What strikes me as odd is that Greg, the literary guy, says "we never did not do anything inappropriate" Freudian slip or just a rush in editing? What also strikes me as odd is that he says, in fact she knows I treated Sarah like crap, as though that makes any of this better.

Next slide reads, "In fact the only reason this girl was even around Kai and Onision is because Onision's ex begged Onision to bring her, despite Onision preferring not to take care of another adult's expenses." This is a world of crap right here. For starters, Greg can't stay consistent and switches from referring to Lainey as Lainey and as Kai. He also fails to include Lainey in the relationship.... Lainey was the one who initially pursued Billie and the intent was for those two to have the relationship, to which Greg sorta invited himself into and whether by spousal pressure or insecurity, Lainey allowed for a very short time. It's clear with how many failed poly relationships that this marriage should not be poly but rather just open. As for the begging, I believe this was debunked already. Billie did not beg for Ayalla to be there but asked. However by using the term beg, Greg attempts to make Billie and Ayalla look as though they had stepped on his toes. He could have said no, but he didn't. That's on him.

Next slide reads, "Onision's ex indicated that this girl was the reason why previous relationships did not work out because her ex-boyfriends did not like her." That has absolutely no fact behind it, we're literally supposed to take Greg's word for it. This is Greg attempting to pit Billie and Ayalla against each other. Notice how he uses "indicated" instead of "stated".

Next, "Other than her previous boyfriend who allegedly cheated on her with Shannon (the youtuber) according to Onision's ex at the time they were dating." This is one of the few times Greg mentions a person's name, and he uses the word allegedly. Allegedly to cover his own ass. I'm sure this is to deflect and create drama between other people. Remember when it comes to Onision, he loves to deflect from his own issues and stir up stuff between other people... allegedly.

Next is where it gets real with allegations. Greg states in this slide, "While this girl lies about Sarah being groomed, she leaves out the fact that she asked Sarah if Sarah would have sex with her in just the short week she was around Onision, Sarah, and Kai. So you can understand why I regret ever flying her out. She is a liar and a pervert." Meanwhile Ayalla ain't stressing because she knows that's not true. Greg asked Sarah to make a video saying that there was no sexual intercourse between them and Sarah, but doesn't ask her to make a video with these allegations? Is Sarah even aware that he's using her as a pawn in his twisted game? Furthermore, the evidence is stacking against Onision and Lainey about the grooming allegations. Whereas there's nothing remotely substantial to back up the claims of Ayalla asking Sarah to sleep with her, besides Greg's statement. Not even from Sarah herself, this is coming from Greg.

Next, "Remember how the first girl asked Onision to stop contacting her right after she realized she was wrong and retracted her slanderous statement? People often do this when they realize they have lost the argument. They have nothing left to defend themselves with, because the truth is not on their side." Wrong on so many counts. Let's bring the texts up again, part of them are cut off. Madison retracted her statement multiple times already, but Greg really wanted it in text. She did not lose anything. People often tell others to not contact them when they are tired of being harassed and/or don't want contact with that person. Since he continued to threaten her with being sued via text - rather than actually following through with it - he did not respect her statement. Greg does not understand what the truth is, given how biased this video is. Next slide he says here are the receipts (spoiler alert they aren't actually receipts, just screenshots, in which he proves that he doesn't respect the wishes of anyone telling them to stop contacting them):

We can assume he has tried to call her and she texts him: "Anything you have to say to me you may say in writing. I don't know what you could possibly discuss with me." Straight to the point.

Greg's response: "It's ok. Our lawyer will contact you." Again bringing up the lawyers that he allegedly doesn't have the money to pay for.

Ayalla responds: Looking forward to it.

And rather than ending it there, he texts her at length the next day: "Sarah very clearly asked you to not talk about her/to leave her alone. Why are you harassing Sarah? Can you please stop causing problems in her life?" I'm gonna stop to say, there's no evidence or screenshots of harassment. The fact that Ayalla slipped up and used Sarah's name in a stream is very clearly just a mistake. Anyone who had tuned into the livestream was there because of the allegations against Onision and Laineybot with Sarah. I understand her not wanting to be named, and Ayalla did her best, it was clearly not malicious. "Additionally Sarah has made it clear you hit on her when you were at our house. You even asked her if she would be willing to sleep with you, and these are Sarah's words." Unless Sarah comes forward to accuse Ayalla, it bears absolutely zero truth. Given what both Lane and Ayalla have had to say about Sarah and what Sarah has said about her possible future relationship with Lainey, I cannot believe Greg.

"I keep hearing about the things you are saying and you admitted you have brain damage acording to Sarah who watched your live stream." Having brain damage does not equate to memory damage, it could be that she has trouble with finding the correct words, and needing extra time to find the correct words. Classic Greg trying to discredit someone with more evidence than he could provide.

"Please get help for your issues and leave Sarah, who has asked you to not discuss her in any way, alone." And this is the Greg who has shown a little bit of concern and empathy lately, but by Greg's own admission, it's easy to fake. "You are harassing her and she just wants to live her life." Again, no evidence of harassment. You got receipts on that, Greg?

"Lastly, you will be receiving a cease and desist soon." Except he continues not just in this same text, but in another.

"You told me long ago to move on, and I did, yet here you are, trying to get back in all of our lives. Please take your own advice, leave Sarah alone and be happy with your own life. Thank you and get well soon." For starters, I feel as though if Ayalla wanted to actually be in their lives, she would reach out to them personally instead of speaking out against them. Secondly, Greg attempts to put himself on this pedestal by showing us his fake concern by telling her he wishes her well.

"Additionally Sarah confirmed most everything you're saying about her is a lie. I'm going to assume you are saying these things as a result of the brain damage you mentioned. I do hope you get well soon." Again, Greg tries to discredit Ayalla and claims that Sarah has confirmed Ayalla being a liar, without providing a lick of evidence. She can't confirm anything, all she can do is say, "uh yeah, false." And I understand why Sarah would say none of this is true, if she's attempting to stay in Greg and Lainey's lives, and maybe she thinks she's the exception because she's just so mature for her age, but she's still young and fully capable of being manipulated by Greg.

Ayalla replies, "I have asked you repeatedly to stop contacting me Greg. You may paint me however you wish but I know the truth and you can't hide from it anymore." Again, short and to the point.

Greg says, "Then why does everyone involved, both Sarah and Kai, claim you are lying? You, a person who was only around for one week, who also hit on/asked Sarah to sleep with you?" Ok, before we continue, I want to mention that if Sarah truly was 16 at the time and Ayalla was 18 or 19, it would have been legal. I'm going to read this for all of you, so that you may get a better understanding of why Greg is wrong on so many counts:

The Washington Age of Consent is 16 years old. In the United States, the age of consent is the minimum age at which an individual is considered legally old enough to consent to participation in sexual activity. Individuals aged 15 or younger in Washington are not legally able to consent to sexual activity, and such activity may result in prosecution for statutory rape.

Washington statutory rape law is violated when a person has consensual sexual intercourse with an individual under age 16. The age of consent is raised to 18 when the partners are a foster parent and foster child, when the older partner is at least 60 months older than their 16 or 17 year old partner and abuses their significant relationship(as defined by RCW 9A.44.010) to have sexual intercourse, or when the partners are teacher and student(this law was actually interpreted by the Washington State Supreme Court to extend to students up to 21 years old).

I don't personally believe that Ayalla would say that considering she was in a relationship with Social Repose at the time, but even if that was the case, it would have been legal for her to ask, or even act on it. It would have been completely illegal for Sarah to have sexual relations with Lainey if she were 16 because of Lainey's guardianship, which they spoke about in a stream. Now that Sarah is 18 years old, it would be legal. Morally questionable, but legal.

Continuing, Ayalla responds, "Your lies will get you nowhere." Greg says, "That's Sarah saying this." Either she is using his phone to which she would probably not refer to herself in the third person the way Greg does. Also, she never states that Ayalla asked her that, or remotely hit on her. Ayalla responds, "Please stop contacting me." Greg does not respect this and continues, because he has a fundamental lack of respect for all women. That's nothing new though.

"Stop talking about Sarah, publicly humiliating her. None of us are saying anything bad about you publicly, you are the one who needs to stop. Sarah asked you, I'm defending her right to privacy. You need to move in with your life, finally." Sarah is an adult now, at 18 years old, so she will be treated as such. No one can defend her using harassment.

Ayalla simply says, "Do not contact me again." Take a shot every time she has to say that. Don't do that, you'll get alcohol poisoning.

Once again, Greg disregard her wishes and says, "All right! Just please don't ask people like Sarah to sleep with you and then years later claim others were as perverted as you are." Oh, Greg. You're doin too much. He literally says, don't ask people like Sarah to sleep with you... what? People who you want to possess or...?

"Best of luck to you and reviving from your brain damage. Seriously, wish you will. Cease and desist is being sent soon and legal action will be taken against you if you continue to humiliate and harass Sarah." Again with the brain damage to which Greg doesn't even know the extent of. Why bother mentioning cease and desist if you already said that if not to use it as a scare tactic? And he also says he'll pursue legal action if she continues to humiliate and harass Sarah... which there's no evidence of anyway, so clearly he's not going to.

Greg being Greg doesn't even end it there, "Heal, get well and find a better use of your time than harassing victims of your sexual harassment (Sarah was 16 at the time you asked her if she would sleep with you) - Get help and become a better person. Goodbye." Was Greg a cheerleader when he was younger because I can almost hear him chanting, "Be aggressive, passive aggressive." Again, no evidence and big if, but if it were true it would not be illegal for Ayalla to ask Sarah to sleep with her.

And of course, in all caps, Ayalla says "STOP CONTACTING ME".

In the next slide, he says "Sarah asked this girl to stop talking about her, directly, and in response this girl tweeted "the plot thickens" - Ok, for starters, Ayalla could have been talking to multiple people about this situation and found out more. Your attempt at correlating is not a direct causation.

"Then proceeded to live streaming, exploiting Sarah for personal gain despite her asking for her to not speak of her. She then uploaded a youtube version of her live stream, where she made hundreds of dollars on her channel, which prior got barely any views." He doesn't know how much she made, and since it is her channel she is allowed to do what she wants. Also, Ayalla has 50k subs, so I'm sure she gets more than just barely any views.

Next slide, "In response to this liar/pervert who asled a 16 year old girl if she wanted to sleep with her making false claims about Kai, the now adult Sarah made the following public statement." Again, harping on the accusation, making it seem like it's illegal. The now adult Sarah did not address anything other than what Greg allegedly asked her to address... something no one was even accusing them of. Grooming has been speculated and there's more evidence of that than anything.

Over this video, Greg has made captions, which read, "Sarah asked this girl to stop talking about her/stop srpeading lies, yet she continued. This video was made as a public plea to discontinue the lies. The girl simply refuses to stop harassing Sarah"

Let me repeat. The accusations were about the inappropriate nature of Lainey and Sarah's relationship and grooming.

"The ex girlfriend of Social Repose" keyword ex and they are no longer associated with each other. "the friend of a girl who was dumped repeatedly for lying, cheating, breaking the law" Greg's way of being a hypocrite. "The girl with nearly no views on her youtube channel" actually about as much if not more than Greg, so... "who was asked by multiple parties to not try and exploit their lives with lies," which she didn't do. "the girl who has everything to gain off lying to the public through revenge and monetary gain for her friend being dumped" why does he keep bringing up Billie... the dude doth project too much if you ask me. "The girl who also asked a 16 year old Sarah to sleep with her (and Sarah backs up this claim)" Sarah just said she didn't want others speaking for her, so she herself can accuse Ayalla publicly, and even then, it's not illegal - whereas anything between Sarah and her former guardian was entirely illegal.

"The girl who also, with Onision's ex, Onision's ex tried to convince a 16 year old Sarah to starve herself like she did, to become part of her eating disorder" that is so grammatically incorrect I can't properly address it, but again, Sarah's an adult now she can address it herself. "and the friend of Onision's ex who offered Sarah illegal drugs, as a 16 year old" no evidence, Greg, "who tried to get Sarah to move in with them as well..." and honestly if the latter is true, I'd assume it had something to do with being concerned about Sarah's wellbeing... you know, like how Lainey took her in for Sarah's wellbeing.

"Again, all facts backed up by Sarah's claims." If you're going to use the term facts, back it up with evidence. Claims are not evidence. "Sarah, a person who is does not have Youtube channel and does not try to turn drama into money" except when she livestreams about the drama?

The next slide is of Madison again where he harps about how desperate she was to date Greg and Lainey. "And this girl, someone who tried to get in a relationship with Onision and Kai and was repeatedly rejected." EVIDENCE. "A girl who cheated on her boyfriend with his boss, who was drunk while slandering Onision, someone who went out of her way to connect with Onision's ex of over 7 years." Hang on though, it's not really that hard to get in contact with another person... like you type some words... sorta how it wouldn't really be that hard for Greg to look up laws about age of consent laws and the EPAs stance on wetlands.

"A girl who lost her friendship with Onision for going behind his back while still trying to be his friend, dishonest." Sure Jan.

Next slide he completely contradicts what he had texted to Madison, "And admitted she was wrong about Onision, issued a public retraction of what she said about Onision." So it's almost like he manipulated her into the retraction to specifically discredit her in this video. Hmm... interesting.

Next slide is of both Ayalla and Madison. The above heading reads, "You trust these two people, one of which admitted she lied.. and the other asked a 16 year old girl if she wanted to have sex with her..." Under the photo of Madison it says "Lied about Onision publicly and later admitted it/retracted." She didn't lie though... she admitted it was a poor choice of words but not that it was a lie. And under Ayalla, it saus "Asked a 16 year old girl if she wanted to have sex with her and offered the 16 year old drugs illegally" do i need to harp on the legalities like Greg harps on his ex, who was initially just supposed to be dating Lainey until he forced his way into the relationship. Was that a poor choice of words? Allegedly.

In the next slide there's a picture of Lainey with what looks like Greg's mom and he has a caption pointing the picture, "And this is the person you think is guilty? THIS is the person you guys are demonizing and trying to ruin the life of? Over what?" Then a caption pointing to a picture of Ayalla reading, "This girl's attempt at five seconds of fame?"

This is Greg's poor attempt at mimicking what the news and media does by using a flattering picture of Lainey and an unflattering one of Ayalla, because he thinks this sweet picture of his mom and Lainey will make us change our minds when there's a lot of shady stuff online that doesn't paint Lainey as this innocent party.

In the next slide, he lines up a well done photo of Lainey, a well done selfie of Sarah, and a photo of Ayalla midspeech, basically just repeating what he had already claimed.

Then he dedicates a slide just to the word and and an elipses, followed by a slide, again harping on Madison, which says that Madison "claims she publicly retracted her statements about Onision" except using the phrase claim is incorrect because she factually retracted her statement by saying, I REPEAT, it was a poor choice of words. Next to an image of Greg and Lainey, with the caption "if very happy he is no longer friends with a liar like her." She may flip flop, but at least the chick corrects herself.

Long story short... is the next slide. Followed by a slide of both Sarah and Ayalla but with the word pervert over Ayalla's photo... The caption says the same shit he's been claiming in this video. The next slide of Madison is pointless really and pretty much his attempt at being gracefully petty, but falls short because it's Greg.

Next, Greg says in true narcissistic fashion - oh no, there I go diagnosing a narcissist without any credentials, just my diploma from Google University - he says "To everyone else, I forgive you for being wrong... But now you have no excuse to continue being wrong."

Then Greg asks everyone to go to twitter and apologize to Lainey, and to comment an apology to Sarah on that video... because he needs the engagement that badly I guess.

And in his next slide he alleges, "We are still pursuing legal action against this girl, who has yet to retract her statements and will be pursued in court with three separate witness and other evidence that remains private." I love that he claims he has evidence and conveniently states that it's private after previously saying that he's taking Sarah's word for it and Sarah is the one making all of the claims. I repeat, claims.

TL;DW: Greg is trying to manipulate his audience into believe that he and his spouse are not predators by attempting to discredit one person who has come forward, and another person who made a passing statement in a livestream and apologized saying it was a poor choice of words.

If you've had any interaction that you find odd or questionable or has made you feel uncomfortable, don't hesitate to reach out. My twitter and instagram require requests and you can reach out to me, but I am not the only one willing to listen. Ayalla has made a tweet saying her DMs are open, and if there are any other youtubers, streamers, etc who are open to listening, please feel free to comment and I will the comment a heart.

I'll catch you guys in my next video.

#scripts #onision allegations

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teeth-guy · 7 years ago

Text

wow. I never realized this THIS WILL BLOW YOU MIND!

the world we live in. it's so... wonderous. mysterious. even magical. no... no no no.. not that world. i meant this one. the smartphone. each system and program app is it's own little planet of perfect. technology. all providing services so necessary, so crucial, so unbelievably profound. look who just sent me a text! addie mccallister? it must be a mistake. or a joke. or a scam! don't send her your social security number. she's right there! that's our user, alex. and, like every freshman in high school, his whole life, everything, revolves around his phone. and, because the pace of life gets, faster and faster... phones down in five. and attention spans get shorter and shorter... and... you're probably not even listening to me right now. who has the time to type out actual words? and that's where we come in. the most important invention in the history of communication! emo gees. that's my home! textopolis. here, each of us does one thing, and we have to nail it every time. christmas tree just has to stand there, all festive. merry christmas! it's still september, tim! and princesses... i am so pretty. they just gotta wear their crowns and keep their hair comb. we are so pretty. devil, poop, thumbs up, they just show up and they're good to go. but for the faces, the pressure is on. cryer always has to cry, even if he just won the lottery. hurray, i'm a millionaire! laugher's always laughing, even if he's just broken his arm. ahh!! ah! i can see the bone!! ah ah ah ah ah... and me, i'm a meh. so i gotta totally be over it all the time, you know? like meh, who cares. which is not as easy as it sounds. i gotta be mehhhhhhhhh i GOTTA! be! mehhhhhhhhh morning misses D, i see you have the little minis with ya! oh, they're so... cute! NYAH, SO ADORABLE, I CAN'T TAKE IT! I WILL NEVER GET THEM TO SLEEP! STICK TO YOUR ONE FACE, WEIRDO. OLE! OLE! OH NO! OH NO! it's hard to only act blasé. when, living in textopolis is.... just so exciting! hah low good simeans! those ah some shalp attach shays! yes, well we have business to attend to. whot kind off business? monkey business. ha ha ha ha, i sounded british. meh... Oh, that was really good.. meh ? meh ... meh ha ha... what the freak ya doing there, mate? practicing. today is my first day on the phone. oh, droit. i'm gonna be so.. meh. what are you going to do? blah! me and the boys are gonna throw ourselves on the barbie! woo! puh-zow! gooday, mate! hey, koh knee chee wah! sorry emote icons!! oh, I hate knocking over the elderly.. let me help, let me help... oh, my colon!!! ducks... hey, is that the time? HEY, my eyes are up here, pal! woo ooh hoo! woo hoo! right on time! and last week, Alex sent me next to THIS text! huh? huh? HA HA HA THAT ELEPHANT PISSED HIMSELF HA HA HA AH HAH HA HAH HAH UH HUH HUH why are YOU laughing, freak? ho ho ha ha ha! now, unlike me, my parents are total pros. gene, please tell me you weren't laughing just now. gene so help me i swear oh, he was, I remember. let's go see if you can get it right. i have some bad news, gene, and i'm afraid that you'll have the wrong reaction. ok, what's the wrong reaction? anything other than meh. come on! i don't want to be late! i'm not letting you go to work today. wait, WHAT? you're just not ready, son. come on!! working in a cube is an Emoji's whole purpose in life! everybody my age is working on the phone except for me! oh sweetie, that's not true. ow! YEAH! i'm going to work on the phone and I'm only ten! that's because I believe in you! should we wash our hands? ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! we're number two! we're number two! see? i, i know i'm different, ok? but, i need to... i can be meh... i just... want to be a working emoji, you know, like... everybody else... and then... i would finally fit in, you know? ah, you fit in, honey. no I don't, mom. I never have. but I could change all that if you just let me! just give me a chance! but what if you get sent out on the phone, making the wrong face? no dad, i'll make the right face! look! maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah? you're so handsome when you make that face. i think he's ready, mel. meh. come on, dad. let me prove it to you. if you really think you're ready... YES! yes i am! i promise i won't let you down! wow! Congratulations, everyone! What an exciting day for all of you! oh, it's really her! oh, pizza! first day on the job, hi, hi! don't be nervous! i won't bite! hi, i'm smiler! ho ho ho ho ho... DON'T TOUCH ME! Hi! i mean.. hey.. as you know, i'm smiler, i'm the system supervisor here, because I was the original emoji. here's how it works. it's nothing fancy! wait a minute... it's really fancy! you each have your own cube on the emoji bar! if alex chooses you, should you be so lucky, your cube will light up! it's showtime! the scanner will scan you, and that scan will get sent right up to alex's text box. and let me tell you guys, there is nothing like getting scanned for the first time. a har, you're gonna love it. now over here is the favorites section, where you'll find all the most popular emo gees. and of course, you'll find my cube here. whoo. you are smooth. just doing my duty. ha ha ha! what did i say? come on, tell me you aren't just a little bit tempted? steven, for the last time, i don't want to buy a timeshare. come on, man, it's high five! you know me! i'm a favorite! Alex hasn't picked you in weeks. when he stops picking you, you're no longer a favorite. there's gotta be some sort of mistake, i mean, look at me, i'm an attractive, hand-giving high five! oh! fistbump! come on in! hey, ladies! FISTBUMP? he's a knucklehead! literally! look at him, I can look like that! ugh, ow, cramp.. big mistake.. oh... help me.. help up a hand.. oh... here you go... thanks mate... hey, little man, how about you create a distraction, and i'll just slip under the rope! uh, oh, is someone lost? smiler, hiya, just leaving. yeah, you know, just killing time before i go back to my cube in the far corner where Alex can't even See Me ANYMORE! you may not be a favorite anymore, but you will always have a place, in a cube! yeah, in the nosebleeds... uh, i'm standing right here? words hurt. the most important thing I can tell you is to just be yourself... basically, happy itself... i am always smiling... places, please! emo gees to your cubes! attention, we've got incoming! gotta be meh, gotta be meh. oh my gosh, my own cube! i can't believe it... oh, i could put a plant over here, and over here could go an inspirational calendar, okay, gotta be meh... look at our son get on there, i'm beaming... with pride! you don't think he'll actually get picked, do you? heiroglyphics. heiroglyphics was an ancient language of picture forms. does that remind anyone of anything. hello. a language of pictures... anyone? early heiroglyphics back in ancient... i gotta reply to addie's text! what should i write? nothing! nothing? words aren't cool. ok, be cool, be cool... alright, alex is not sure how he wants to play this... oh! i would really love it to be me! beam me up! beam me up! i need thumbs up on standby! oh yeah! thumbs up is going in! wait! alex is changing his mind! he's moving! ok, looks like it's gonna be meh... i'm so nervous, i could almost shrug. we are go for meh! initiating scan! okay, you can do this. ah! i can't do this! i can't do it! stop the scan! i can't, it's too late! oh! what's he doing? he's making the wrong face! good for him, little... wait, what? ugh. abort, abort! oh, shi... shut it down, shut it down! ah! what is that emoji? all the emo gees present, evacuate the cube! evacuate the cube! i gotta get out of here! i'm trying! oh, jeez. sorry, everybody. that is not what i meant to do! i kinda.. i kinda panicked.. are you even a meh at all? uh, who, me? like you are, is a malfunction! a malfunction? no, i can be meh, just give me one more chance? you know what would be really fun? a board meeting, where we can find out what to do with you! i just wanted to be useful, you know, fit in! now everybody's calling me a malfunction. i am a malfunction. even if you are a malfunction, gene, your mom and dad still love ya. i knew you weren't ready. let's get you out of here and take you home. one day, all of this will blow over, and everyone will almost forget about what you did. until then, you should probably stay locked up in the apartment. wait, you're gonna hide me away? you're embarrased of me. it's for your own safety. we're trying to protect you, son. gene, where are you going? i'm not going to run away from this. i'm an emoji, and, even though i'm not exactly sure which one... i've gotta have some sort of purpose here, i know it. gene, no! sweetie, please! so, how'd it go, gavel? hey, lightbulb, tell me what's going on in there. what... poop... what is it? tell me turd, tell me truth. what happened? i know it was an accident. we all have accidents you're so soft, poop. not too soft, i hope. i came up here to defend myself, but, uh, you seem pretty happy. so, good news? i'm always happy. oh, right, yeah, truth. but the only thing that could ever make me unhappy, is if one of our emo gees has made a mistake. which would cause alex to lose faith in the phone... and then, our whole gets wiped out! smiler, i devil pinky swear promise to you that i will never, ever make a mistake in the cube again. oh, we know you won't, gene. we know you won't! ha ha, you know, the first time you said it it sounded genuine, but then you repeated it, and, and then, now it's weird. we're setting you up! with our best anti virus bots! so they'll, like, uh, they'll just, they're gonna fix me? actually, delete you. but yes! wait, what? if you get deleted, you don't have to worry about department heads, or the future, or lying about being a malfunction! because you're deleted, right? right! good job! bots! no! stop, he's escaped! party time! oh, wait a minute... the air is better here! beer, tea... i'm coffee! sorry... ish... so ish e. my old cube! ugh, pinkeye. mike! my name's not mike... ah! there's AV bots coming! what, me? just because i'm in the wrong section? holy toledo! what do we do? quick! this way! let's go! don't tell anyone you're about to see this. they'll never find us down here. where are we? the basement? nope. welcome to the loser lounge, where the emo gees who never get used, hang out. go fish! fishcake with swirls sweep so you won't cry. sweep so you won't cry. sweep so you won't cry. i almost got deleted! me! high five! hey, what's up high five? they weren't trying to delete you, they were trying to delete me. you? what's so important about you that they'd send out an entire team of bots? they say... i'm a malfunction. gasp oh, you bringing malfunctions in here now, high five? for crying out loud, abandoned luggage, that had better not be my leftover chinese food... uh... what chinese food? huh ha! do you have any idea what it's like to be living large? hashtag blessed? the favorite of the favorites, and then demoted to this pit of despair? here, will you hit my callouses for me? at least you're a working emoji, that's all i ever wanted. well, if that's all it will take you to be satisfied, then just find a hacker and get reprogrammed. it's not that complicated. where would i find a hacker? in the piracy app, duh. ugh. and who took my clear nail polish? piracy app? to get there, i mean, i have to leave textopolis. so? i've done it. would you be a brother. one of the princess emo gees left the phone altogether, now she lives on the cloud... mmm... ooh, that is good. i'm sure the hacker that helped her do that could easily reprogram you. The name's jailbreak. jailbreak? that's great? reprogrammed. i just need to get reprogrammed, and then i can finally be the meh i was meh to be! help me find that hacker high five, will you? please? maybe this hacker can help you, too? like, rewrite some code? get you into the favorites sections? wait a minute! ow. i've been trying to use my charisma and sensitive entitlement to get me back on top when all I need is a hacker! today's your lucky day! let's roll! hey, can i come too? talk to the hand, bretheren. i thought i was... bye, felicia. ciao, fishcake with swirls. daddy's headed back to the VIPs where he belongs! wait, what about the bots? good point, good point. ow, ow ow, ow... hey... i shouldn't have picked the cactus. i shouldn't have picked it. you didn't even try to get the tree, it's baffling. let's go. high five? hello? high five! where are you? i'm right here! here we are! end of the text aisle. no way. come on, gene, it's perfectly safe! ah! gene, help me! high five! oh no, this is all my fault, high five, I... i'm just messing with you! it's just one of those rubber finger monster puppets from the eighties, i collected the whole set! alright, you coming? uh, what do i do? what do you mean? just take a step through the other side. this, is it. the next time i come back here, i'll be a real meh. high five? woah! are you finished? where, where are we? welcome... to the wallpaper! wow. this place is incredible! each app is a whole new world. ow, that's my face, get off my face, thank you. what is this place? WeChat! it's like a whole other world! oh, it is. what are they? they're bubble pups, they might be cute, but man, are they clean. bubble pups? they're stickers, gene, try to get with the program? this is so cool! wait, what's in that one! everybody's talking about themselves! how does he know so many people? none of these people know him, but they like him, and that's what matters in this life, popularity. uh, i, i think i'd rather just have a real friend. a real friend? how's that going to get you anywhere? what you need are fans! they give you complete and unrelenting support! as long as you're on top. poor gene, i blame myself. i blame you, too. i just wanted to be supported. you just wanted a vacation. you take that back, mel. bots, they haven't found gene by now. he must have skipped town. you mean the wallpaper? our boy's on the run. how about we find him ourselves? yeah, sure. tell those bots to follow those mehs. i'm sure they'll know about all those freaky deaky apps Gene would hide out in. i'm really good at making plans, you guys, right? here we are, the piracy app! this is where we'll find jailbreak. um, but this is, the dictionary app. that's just what alex wants his parents to think. this is called a skin. really? what could a teenage boy possibly want to hide from his parents? just try to keep up, this place can get a little rough. ahoy mateys, look who's back! high five! i'm a bit of a celebrity here, always welcome. ow! loser! come on, follow me. oh, great, emo gees! i thought the conversation just got dumber. ugh, internet trolls, just ignore them. eventually, they'll get a job, or a girlfriend, or some sort of purpose in life, and then they'll stop. virus, we'll just, we'll just walk over this way... hi! it's so great to see you again! do i know you? it's spam! just sign here and i can get you special discounts on vitamins and coupon offers that can save you up to 25 percent! 25 percent? nonono no no, don't get sucked in! back off, spam! it's the only way to do it. back off! thank you very much! you can illegally download our CD right here! hey, trojan horse, how are you? yeah, what'll it be had? i'll have a bottle of... hack, daniels, hmm? maybe with a plate of... cheese, and hackers, kapeesh? you try to buy a hacker, you can just ask, you know. oh, sorry, um, yes. we're looking for a hacker named jailbreak. oh, i know a guy who could hook you up. right over there. oh, yes. patable. no, not him. her! wait, he's a she? hey! jailbreak! mind if we join in? yes. that's the thing about the internet, is that you never know if someone's being ironic or sincere. i sincerely, unironically want you to go away. ha ha ha ha, so good... so here's the thing, my friend gene here has a little problem. well, see, i'm supposed to be a meh, but i don't really feel... yeah, yeah, and we thought that you could help... the princess, you know, off the phone... woah, hold up, that's not a meh face. bots, they're after me! how are you doing that? look, it's just something that i can do, can you help us? follow me. bots, delete my history! i need to wipe my entire hard drive! i made the most delicious cinnamon buns! maybe if there was something to uh, jog my memory? come on! move! hey trolls, wipe our mailbox wearing a tuxedo! hi, it's so great to see you again! this tunnel will get us out of here! move! get us out of here! move! did that cloud taste sweet to you? ow. ow. ow. help me. help, i'm stuck! sweet motherboard! where am i? candy crush! get me out of here! hey, cornface! try getting him out the top! already on it! hold tight, gene! woah! woah! this feels very off.. and smells. i mean, it smells delicious, but, i still don't like it! the game obviously thinks you're a candy, even though you're, weirdly misshapen, you know? what do i do? stay very still! don't worry, we've got your back! right, high five? hey, fingers! you wanna focus? for your information, i happen to have a sugar addiction, and it's a very, serious... hey, finger head, we have to get Gene out of the game without blowing him up! i don't want to blow up! we have to match up the candies so that Gene will drop to the bottom. and we can't match him with any yellows, or else... oh! don't do that, please don't do that. watch. got it? knock 3 in a row, don't blow gene up, got it. and, we have to be careful. yeah yeah yeah. careful! woo hoo! candy! yo! no no no! don't do yellow! do NOT do the yellow! i said careful! hey, addie! i... i was just wondering, if, you are... tasty. what? um... delicious. excuse me? sweet. hey addie! uh... hi nikki. see you later, alex sugar crush. ah! i'm so over this. Wireless Repair Service, how may I help you? i'd like to make an appointment. it's like this phone is playing games with me! woah! hey, what does this do? get me out of here! ooh... suck it in... stop it... stop it... ow ow ow... it's not working! well, there's one option left. we line you up with the yellows. but you said not to do that! special candies get transported to that jar. the game might think that you're a special candy. and... what if it doesn't think i'm a special candy? well... ah! jailbreak, hello? hello, jailbreak? uh, sorry. what if it doesn't think i'm a special candy? oh, i'm not too worried about it. alright, just do it. gene, gene! you're alive! you were trying to see if i had somehow turned into candy, weren't you? yes i was. and you have not! hey, looks like something popped up on alex's calender. ah, i'm sure it's nothing. uh, alex made an appointment at the phone store? calm down, everyone, calm down. don't worry, everything is fine. maybe alex just wants to buy some accessories. uh, his appointment is with techinical support. well, i'm sure we'll have plenty of time to figure this out. uh, his appointment is for tomorrow. then maybe it's just for some routine maintenance? uh, actually, it's to erase the phone. listen, gene, i'm about to become your knight in shining armor. you are? oh yeah. but first, we need to get uploaded to the cloud. that's where we'll find the source code to reprogram you. the... cloud? isn't that off the phone? ding dingding ding! you got it! mmhm, yeah, the cloud! off the phone! uh! we're in candy crush, oz, i know a shortcut to just dance, which is right next to dropbox, where we can get uploaded to the cloud. mmhm, of course, just go dive into the dropbox and vroom! hold up, here's the stinker. before they let us into the cloud, we have to get past this... firewall. the firewall uses face identification. it's really annoying, because i've already tried to get through. guessed wrong once, and now i'm locked out for life. locked out for life? you're thinking, because i can make different faces, the firewall will think i'm different emo gees! yeah, i wanted to say it, because it was my idea. you know, women are always coming up with stuff that men are taking credit for. you know what, well, let's hit the road. high five, you coming? i'm coming! why do i always think i'm going to come around on black licorice? ah! oh! my precious... move it! sudden death, here we come! let's try this one... you tube? wow, what an original treat, and i don't even need a remote. that guy is so expressive. he reminds me of gene. yes, something's really wrong here. our son is a malfunction, and you should have never let him go into that cube. don't blame me for that now, i am hopping mad at you. see? mary, i think we're being followed, but don't overreact. uh oh. i told you not to overreact. what are you doing now? i could be in there for hours. hey, where are you going. i think we should go our seperate ways, mel. i thought i knew the meh that i married, but maybe i don't. but, mary? this tunnel will help us avoid the bots. thanks for helping us. it's really, really nice of you. NPD, dude. you're helping me! move along, move it, why so slow? high five, stop, why are you getting so close? back off. i can't stop now, i'm having a sugar rush! i'm going to go around you. if i stop moving, my heart's going to explode! coming through, jailbreak! watch out! hey! watch it, knuckle butt! i can't feel my face! ha ha! jailbreak, you said back there that i'm... helping you. i've been trying to get past that firewall for months! ha ha ha ha ha, come on, come on, the faster we go, the faster I can become a favorite! ah ha ha ha ha ha! woo hoo! look at me i just want to bounce out of here, get off the phone, and live on the cloud! hee hee! ow! what just happened! you know, you don't like it here? there are so many rules here! what is up with that? the cloud's supposed to be amazing, it's full of dreams too... oh, sugar crash. i can't hold on anymore. catch me, gene, catch me! and you can be whoever you want! thanks. we're free! come on! oh, oh my gosh, my hands are sweating. you know what, come to think of it, i don't really remember there ever being a hacker emoji. oh, um, you know, you're taking too much of my brain space, let's try to keep the chit chat to a minimum. ooh, someone likes you. what are you talking about? this just like when peace sign gave me just one finger, i knew she was in love with me. let's go! ugh, i'm never eating another piece of candy ever again... high-five, don't do it! don't you do it! it's already been in there once. don't do it. wow. move it! are my fingers getting fat? i'll tell you what, this bandage wasn't so tight before. okay, we get through this app, and dropbox is right on the other side. we just need to keep it super DL in here. and no matter what, we can't, turn it, on. OMG this turned it on! what? i'm a hand, it's a big red button! woah. no no no no! what's happening! welcome to just dance! follow my moves and you get to move forward! do the wrong moves and you get an X! three strikes and you're out! out? what does she mean by out? digital death. thanks to you, fingers, now we're going to have to dance our way out. which is alright with me, because I can shake it like michael. or michael's glove, anyway. Are you ready to daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnccccccee? this is bad, gene, i can't dance, i got no groove! come on, everybody can dance! not me, okay? i'm really stiff... see? you don't... understand? okay, no no. stop, stop. you have to stop. i see now what you are saying? just follow her moves. ready to dance in three! this i can't do! two! dude! just shut up and... dance! i'm just doing it! hee hee! shamon! jailbreak! i got you! look, just do the music, express yourself! dance? yeah, you got it! now throw some sauce on that dance burrito! woo hoo! i'm doing it! i'm finally nailing this dance! you got it! hee hee! oh ho ho! great job! now you're moving on to free dance! impress us with your moves to move forward! more dancing? you're killing it, gene! nice! take it gene! you can break it! wait a minute! i've never seen that dance before! what's it called? the emoji... bob? i love it! you do! everybody! do the emojiiiiiiiiiii bob! ha ha ha! woo! oh! princess! woah! you're the princess emoji! you never got off the phone! new player! who? oh no! we gotta go! no worry, they're robots, they can't dance! downloading thought protocol... can't dance, he says. heh. hey alex, you gonna dance for us? alex, that's extra homework for you. yeah, alex's getting wicked, ha ha ha... alex must be deleting the app! watch out! we gotta get out of here! come on! hoo! this song is my jam! high five! come on! let's go! hurry! gene! i got you! gene! gene... hey, wait a minute, where's high five? alex trashed the app.. and high five right along with it. wait, what? wait, trashed? high five is in the trash? he wanted to dance... but, i knew it was a bad idea... i'm so sorry... we gotta get him out of there. gene, dropbox is right here, we have to get to the cloud! and the trash is on the other side of the phone! we don't know how many other bots are out there! i'm sorry! no, wait! i can't go without high five. i don't care how far away it is. gene... that's my friend down there. i'm not going to just let him get deleted. what, what is it? i've always just thought, you've got to look out for number one... but what good is it to be number one, if there aren't any other numbers? wow, okay. i'm sorry, this is, this is my malfunction, i just, i can't be meh about anything, this is why i'm going to be reprogrammed. well, actually, it's kinda cool. wait, really? no, i think i know a shortcut. we can take the music streams in spotify. let's go give that big hand a hand. come on! now it's trashed the just dance app, and our bots are offline, and it's giving me a real headache... i am so angry! i really need to stay happy. can we please lighten the mood? no one can resist la fiesta! ole! not that happy. ow! we've only got four hours before alex's phone appointment. if they find a malfunction on the phone, we are all going to be wiped! she said wiped! aim higher, steven. i didn't want to have to do this, but it is fun to press buttons. the illegal upgrade! now that makes me happy! ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! i just want to dance.. dance... argh! quiet, you saucy gypsy. ugh, where am i? hi! it's so great to see you again! you're in the trash, fingers for brains! get away from me, troll! hi! it's so great to see you again! i've got to get out of here. you can't! and at the end of the day, the trash gets emptied, and we're all going to die! oh no, no, no! this is the last face you will ever see! this is spotify? yep, every one of those streams is a different song. is it safe? are you sure that this is a good idea? that's the point of the wave, dude! can we at least pick a... a colorless stream? okay buzzkill... alex, a bunch of people are hitting the promenade, and i think addie might be there, too... that's perfect! i have an appointment down there, anyway! i've got to get this phone fixed! hey, bubble butt! yeah. ah, much better. so, i gotta ask, is it true that when a princess whistles, birds fly down from the skies.. hello, stereotype, that is a complete and total myth! i'm sorry. did you realize that in the first emoji set, a woman can either be a princess, or a bride? that's why I need to get to the cloud, where you can be whatever you want to be! get ready! whale song coming! wait, wait, whale what? whale song! from alex's biology DVD! woah! wow! woah! ha ha ha ha. you're not going to see that sitting around in a cube. funny, you went out of the cube, and I went in. gene, that means you can't be yourself. what's the point? you know, i think you're pretty cool just the way you are. we're, we're going to need this. nobody knows, the touchscreen dramascene. nobody knows my screenshot... trash? me? i used to be somebody. here i am, in an old email Alex never sent. addie, blah blah blah blah blergh... and then there's me! high five! right there! doing my job! FYI, nobody cares about you. just leave me, troll, and let me die! in this dump alone! let me look for the world's smallest violin in here, so that you can play it! is that the hand angel of mercy? has she finally come for me? give me your hand! i mean, give me yourself! take my hand, angel! i'm ready to take my place amongst the other great hands of the past. it's me, gene! gene? the one and only. gene! i got him! take me with you! high five! let go of me! you'd leave me down here? you were wrong, troll, people do care about me! and i'm not upset, troll! do you see how not upset I am? gene! you came back for me! you saved me... it wasn't just me, jailbreak helped, too. she's a hugger. give her a squeeze. oh, nonono no. not really, nothing great. i'm not feeling your feelings, relieve me! you filthy trolls, I inhaled your stench, and I was once one of you, so I feel your pain. so now, go. be free! smooth sailing from here. huh ha ha! ugh. gene! gene... gene? are you insta gramming? oh, where is my gene... oh, mary, you've really done it this time. no, you haven't. mel? what are you doing in alex's trip to france album? i was looking for you. none of this is your fault, mary. it's mine. what do you mean? is that a tear on your cheek? it's my fault gene is the way he is. i have other expressions, too. i think they've just been buried away. but with gene going missing, and thinking i might have lost you, too... oh, mel, why didn't you tell me? i didn't know myself. right now, i'm so overwhelmed with passionate feelings for you. mary, my love for you burns with the intensity of a red hot flame. oh, i like it. let's go find our son. together. we'll always have paris, mary. so you're a princess. so you have a little tiara, very fancy. is it true when a princess whistles, birds fly that's what i said! no, guys, that's a stupid myth! what awkward virgin haven are you living in? go read an e-book! educate yourself! uh, jailbreak? what the? what is that? smiley must have upgraded her bots! let's get out of here before it... hi, do you remember me, it's smiler! i'm coming to you live from the amphitheater, why don't you come back to textopolis and we can talk through our differences, okay? my friend here will escort you, alright, i'm gonna see you soon, buddy, bye now! we're actually going to delete them in front of everyone. psst, it's still on. it's still on? oh! jiminy, attack the frauds! seperate! take a look! jailbreak! gene! this way! it's still onto me! over here! let's go! we have to make it to dropbox! yes! no! go low! woah! don't worry, it can't get in. it's illegal malware, and this app is secure. come on. welcome to dropbox! you are about to leave the phone. remain seated, please! permanecer sentados por favor! might want to hang on! why do they call it dropbox, anyway? oh, this is why! i see why now! i'd better not see that candy corn again! we made it! you guys, chill. we still have to get past... that. oh... shaw. welcome to the firewall, how may I help you? alright, here goes! what should I do? sit in the corner, and don't say a word. keep those soft fingers to yourself. yes, your majesty, princess of nightmares! now gene, step onto the password icon, and i'll feed you the passwords. okay. okay. ten, eleven, two thousand and two. ten, eleven, two thousand and two. ow. cough. access denied. okay, try a different expression. is it going to blast me every time i messed up? yeah, kind of. what do you mean kind of? ready? welcome to the firewall. his favorite food. chimichangas! chimichangas? ow. access denied. huh. this might take a while. oh boy. krav maga! krav maga. major lazer! major lazer. what did i do now? ow. skate, or die! access denied. denied. denied. denied. i don't get it! we've tried all of the important things in alex's life! his favorite pet, his sport, his favorite grandma... i'm sorry, gene. i let us all down. now, if I had to come up with a password, I'd probably use the name of a girl I like. i've been all over the phone! he's never mentioned a girl. yes he has! hi. when I was in the trash, I read a very interesting email, but, i'm just a dunce, in the corner, forbidden to speak... what email? sorry, what? what email? uh, took it out, at school, he was declaring his feelings of love for her, i guess instead of sending it he tossed it in the trash. high five, this is very important. what is her name? her name, yes! excellent question. it... was... tina. karen. marge. lint, lindsay. ack, allison. sarah, or, lupita. i want to say lupita, but that doesn't feel right, now i'm saying it out loud. ugh.. gotta find that email, i think i can access the trash. i got it! addie! yes! yes, that's it, addie! i knew i'd get there! dear addie, you and I, we are like diamonds in the sky. you're a shooting star I see. a vision, ecstacy. shining bright like a diamond. he used a high-five, see? guess now we know why he trashed it. ooh, shade. guys, should we try this? addie! access granted. oh snap. this place, is, amazing. wow, i can't believe it. woah. one little emoji could sure get lost in a place like this. i... i guess we should, make you, a meh before that bot comes back home. oh, oh, so we're gonna do that now. we had a deal, right? yeah, okay. right. i, uh, guess i'll start hacking. ha! we did it, gene! all our dreams are coming true! i'll be alex's favorite again, and you'll be a real meh! ha ha, yeah! do the hand dance. do the hand dance. and pinky. pop it with the pinky. pop it with the pinky. yeah, but this all seems kinda super fast now, doesn't it? i didn't expect to be having these feelings right now. well, maybe you should go and express them while you still can. so, uh, i've been thinking, um, ever since we. jailbreak, you're the coolest, most interesting emoji i've ever met. and, after all the adventures that we've had, i'm just not sure that i want all of that to go away. because, my feelings, right now, are, like, huge. i just think that they could be enough for me to want to stay the way that I am. if it means that i could stay here, with you, like, forever. forever and ever. and ever. maybe longer than that, even? like in the fairy tales. uh... wait, wuh, what is that? gene, if this is about you deciding not to be meh, then, i am all about that. i like you just the way you are, but i had a plan. right. i'm not just some princess, gene, waiting for my prince. i mean, uh, what you said was beautiful, but, gene... ha ha ha! you're all... meh! the source code worked! turns out I didn't need it. for the first time in life, meh is all I feel. oh! gene! i have an appointment. i'm a little early. no prob. i can take you right now. jailbreak! ah! don't do that! that freaking huge bot has got gene back inside the phone! what? he left being more meh than the meh-est meh face i've seen! what did you say to him? it's what I didn't say. we gotta go get him. how are we going to get there in time before he gets deleted? ugh.. i can't believe i'm doing this. you tell anyone you saw this and I'll crack more than those knuckles. woah. birds do like princesses! it's not a myth! it's not a myth at all! what happened with becoming a favorite? because i'd rather have one real friend. let's go get him. i can't wait to see that emoji's face! look at that expression! is that for realizing that you've put all of textopolis at risk? causing Alex to question our reliability? hmm? hey, now that's going too far, even for me! if we could delete this malfunction, before he gets dissapointed, Alex will realize there's nothing wrong with the phone. and any last words? meh. well, it's too late for that. delete him! wait! you delete gene, you'll have to delete me, too. what? i have the same malfunction gene has. dad? oh gosh, i don't know what to do! yes i do! BOTS! sorry misses meh. wow. i did not see that one coming. smiler, I think you might be making too much stink out of all this. oh really? how about you're next? i was wrong, gene. i should have believed in you all along. oh, what a touching daddy son reunion moment! it reminds me of the time I deleted you both! oh wait! that's this time! delete the two malfunctions! How's that for an entroof gasp oh, great. I can't reach! oh no! what did you do to my beautiful monst Ow my tooth! hand, button! jailbreak? oh, gene... you really are a meh... what happened to looking out for number one? being number one doesn't matter if there aren't any other numbers. alex's appointment! he's deleting the phone! nononono no no no no! show me alex. are you sure you want to delete everything? do it! red alert! alex, no! game over. fellas, i'm afraid this is the last call. dude, addie's here. you should go over. every time I try, i screwed up! i don't even know how to tell her how I feel! if we help alex connect to addie, maybe he won't delete us. i might be able to bypass the wipe and get a text through to him. but we'll only have time to send one. maybe I should go! he has love in his eyes. send me! alex looks nervous, too! he's more shy than nervous! stop! it's gene. he's all of those things! emo gees should only be one thing! oh, really? gasp the princess! linda? not now, mom! gene, you got this. that's not me anymore. but I have to try. it's starting! no! it's ending! almost in? working on it! mom? dad? no.. i'm in! last time I was in this cube I screwed everything up. gene, why do you think I came back? it's because of you. me. it's all inside of you, gene. just try to bring it back. and do you. high five! i don't want to wave goodbye! it's now or never, gene! jailbreak, now! woah! she got this emoji! no way! hey, i got your text! that's one super cool emoji! i know, right? a lot of feelings in one! i get it! i like that you're one of those guys who actually expresses feelings! yeah, that's me! so, do you think you cou yes, i'd love to go to the dance with you. we made it! oh, i could have lost you, peter pinky finger... oh, you wretchy ring finger, even you, tiberius thumb... change your mind? yeah, maybe it's weird, but i'm going to hold onto it. gene, you did it! you saved us all! oh, mel... gee hee eene! gee hee hee heene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! and us! and high five! and high five! and high five! and high five! hey, what happened, gene? slap me some skin! and a little orange for the pinky! hey high five! save a little hand for later! unless you know the hamburger! back on top of the hand pile! you're not on the list! wait, what? what's going on? ha! from now on, everyone is welcome! wait, what is all this? it's for you, gene! everybody! the emoji bob! this is so jazzy... go eggplant! go eggplant! go eggplant! we are out of Alex's pocket, emo gees! this is not a butt dial! to your cubes! are we up and running? roger that. good, because we got incoming! looks like it's gonna be gene. hey gene, ready to try out your new cube? in 3, 2...

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you-just-got-wormed · 7 years ago

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#the entire emoji movie script #here you go #long post ;)#somehow i think its shorter than the bee movie #i havent seen this honestly #the emoji movie #trash

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gay-white-bread · 7 years ago

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the world we live in. it’s so… wonderous. mysterious. even magical. no… no no no.. not that world. i meant this one. the smartphone. each system and program app is it’s own little planet of perfect. technology. all providing services so necessary, so crucial, so unbelievably profound. look who just sent me a text! addie mccallister? it must be a mistake. or a joke. or a scam! don’t send her your social security number. she’s right there! that’s our user, alex. and, like every freshman in high school, his whole life, everything, revolves around his phone. and, because the pace of life gets, faster and faster… phones down in five. and attention spans get shorter and shorter… and… you’re probably not even listening to me right now. who has the time to type out actual words? and that’s where we come in. the most important invention in the history of communication! emo gees. that’s my home! textopolis. here, each of us does one thing, and we have to nail it every time. christmas tree just has to stand there, all festive. merry christmas! it’s still september, tim! and princesses… i am so pretty. they just gotta wear their crowns and keep their hair comb. we are so pretty. devil, poop, thumbs up, they just show up and they’re good to go. but for the faces, the pressure is on. cryer always has to cry, even if he just won the lottery. hurray, i’m a millionaire! laugher’s always laughing, even if he’s just broken his arm. ahh!! ah! i can see the bone!! ah ah ah ah ah… and me, i’m a meh. so i gotta totally be over it all the time, you know? like meh, who cares. which is not as easy as it sounds. i gotta be mehhhhhhhhh i GOTTA! be! mehhhhhhhhh morning misses D, i see you have the little minis with ya! oh, they’re so… cute! NYAH, SO ADORABLE, I CAN’T TAKE IT! I WILL NEVER GET THEM TO SLEEP! STICK TO YOUR ONE FACE, WEIRDO. OLE! OLE! OH NO! OH NO! it’s hard to only act blasé. when, living in textopolis is…. just so exciting! hah low good simeans! those ah some shalp attach shays! yes, well we have business to attend to. whot kind off business? monkey business. ha ha ha ha, i sounded british. meh… Oh, that was really good.. meh ? meh … meh ha ha… what the freak ya doing there, mate? practicing. today is my first day on the phone. oh, droit. i’m gonna be so.. meh. what are you going to do? blah! me and the boys are gonna throw ourselves on the barbie! woo! puh-zow! gooday, mate! hey, koh knee chee wah! sorry emote icons!! oh, I hate knocking over the elderly.. let me help, let me help… oh, my colon!!! ducks… hey, is that the time? HEY, my eyes are up here, pal! woo ooh hoo! woo hoo! right on time! and last week, Alex sent me next to THIS text! huh? huh? HA HA HA THAT ELEPHANT PISSED HIMSELF HA HA HA AH HAH HA HAH HAH UH HUH HUH why are YOU laughing, freak? ho ho ha ha ha! now, unlike me, my parents are total pros. gene, please tell me you weren’t laughing just now. gene so help me i swear oh, he was, I remember. let’s go see if you can get it right. i have some bad news, gene, and i’m afraid that you’ll have the wrong reaction. ok, what’s the wrong reaction? anything other than meh. come on! i don’t want to be late! i’m not letting you go to work today. wait, WHAT? you’re just not ready, son. come on!! working in a cube is an Emoji’s whole purpose in life! everybody my age is working on the phone except for me! oh sweetie, that’s not true. ow! YEAH! i’m going to work on the phone and I’m only ten! that’s because I believe in you! should we wash our hands? ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! we’re number two! we’re number two! see? i, i know i’m different, ok? but, i need to… i can be meh… i just… want to be a working emoji, you know, like… everybody else… and then… i would finally fit in, you know? ah, you fit in, honey. no I don’t, mom. I never have. but I could change all that if you just let me! just give me a chance! but what if you get sent out on the phone, making the wrong face? no dad, i’ll make the right face! look! maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah? you’re so handsome when you make that face. i think he’s ready, mel. meh. come on, dad. let me prove it to you. if you really think you’re ready… YES! yes i am! i promise i won’t let you down! wow! Congratulations, everyone! What an exciting day for all of you! oh, it’s really her! oh, pizza! first day on the job, hi, hi! don’t be nervous! i won’t bite! hi, i’m smiler! ho ho ho ho ho… DON’T TOUCH ME! Hi! i mean.. hey.. as you know, i’m smiler, i’m the system supervisor here, because I was the original emoji. here’s how it works. it’s nothing fancy! wait a minute… it’s really fancy! you each have your own cube on the emoji bar! if alex chooses you, should you be so lucky, your cube will light up! it’s showtime! the scanner will scan you, and that scan will get sent right up to alex’s text box. and let me tell you guys, there is nothing like getting scanned for the first time. a har, you’re gonna love it. now over here is the favorites section, where you’ll find all the most popular emo gees. and of course, you’ll find my cube here. whoo. you are smooth. just doing my duty. ha ha ha! what did i say? come on, tell me you aren’t just a little bit tempted? steven, for the last time, i don’t want to buy a timeshare. come on, man, it’s high five! you know me! i’m a favorite! Alex hasn’t picked you in weeks. when he stops picking you, you’re no longer a favorite. there’s gotta be some sort of mistake, i mean, look at me, i’m an attractive, hand-giving high five! oh! fistbump! come on in! hey, ladies! FISTBUMP? he’s a knucklehead! literally! look at him, I can look like that! ugh, ow, cramp.. big mistake.. oh… help me.. help up a hand.. oh… here you go… thanks mate… hey, little man, how about you create a distraction, and i’ll just slip under the rope! uh, oh, is someone lost? smiler, hiya, just leaving. yeah, you know, just killing time before i go back to my cube in the far corner where Alex can’t even See Me ANYMORE! you may not be a favorite anymore, but you will always have a place, in a cube! yeah, in the nosebleeds… uh, i’m standing right here? words hurt. the most important thing I can tell you is to just be yourself… basically, happy itself… i am always smiling… places, please! emo gees to your cubes! attention, we’ve got incoming! gotta be meh, gotta be meh. oh my gosh, my own cube! i can’t believe it… oh, i could put a plant over here, and over here could go an inspirational calendar, okay, gotta be meh… look at our son get on there, i’m beaming… with pride! you don’t think he’ll actually get picked, do you? heiroglyphics. heiroglyphics was an ancient language of picture forms. does that remind anyone of anything. hello. a language of pictures… anyone? early heiroglyphics back in ancient… i gotta reply to addie’s text! what should i write? nothing! nothing? words aren’t cool. ok, be cool, be cool… alright, alex is not sure how he wants to play this… oh! i would really love it to be me! beam me up! beam me up! i need thumbs up on standby! oh yeah! thumbs up is going in! wait! alex is changing his mind! he’s moving! ok, looks like it’s gonna be meh… i’m so nervous, i could almost shrug. we are go for meh! initiating scan! okay, you can do this. ah! i can’t do this! i can’t do it! stop the scan! i can’t, it’s too late! oh! what’s he doing? he’s making the wrong face! good for him, little… wait, what? ugh. abort, abort! oh, shi… shut it down, shut it down! ah! what is that emoji? all the emo gees present, evacuate the cube! evacuate the cube! i gotta get out of here! i’m trying! oh, jeez. sorry, everybody. that is not what i meant to do! i kinda.. i kinda panicked.. are you even a meh at all? uh, who, me? like you are, is a malfunction! a malfunction? no, i can be meh, just give me one more chance? you know what would be really fun? a board meeting, where we can find out what to do with you! i just wanted to be useful, you know, fit in! now everybody’s calling me a malfunction. i am a malfunction. even if you are a malfunction, gene, your mom and dad still love ya. i knew you weren’t ready. let’s get you out of here and take you home. one day, all of this will blow over, and everyone will almost forget about what you did. until then, you should probably stay locked up in the apartment. wait, you’re gonna hide me away? you’re embarrased of me. it’s for your own safety. we’re trying to protect you, son. gene, where are you going? i’m not going to run away from this. i’m an emoji, and, even though i’m not exactly sure which one… i’ve gotta have some sort of purpose here, i know it. gene, no! sweetie, please! so, how’d it go, gavel? hey, lightbulb, tell me what’s going on in there. what… poop… what is it? tell me turd, tell me truth. what happened? i know it was an accident. we all have accidents you’re so soft, poop. not too soft, i hope. i came up here to defend myself, but, uh, you seem pretty happy. so, good news? i’m always happy. oh, right, yeah, truth. but the only thing that could ever make me unhappy, is if one of our emo gees has made a mistake. which would cause alex to lose faith in the phone… and then, our whole gets wiped out! smiler, i devil pinky swear promise to you that i will never, ever make a mistake in the cube again. oh, we know you won’t, gene. we know you won’t! ha ha, you know, the first time you said it it sounded genuine, but then you repeated it, and, and then, now it’s weird. we’re setting you up! with our best anti virus bots! so they’ll, like, uh, they’ll just, they’re gonna fix me? actually, delete you. but yes! wait, what? if you get deleted, you don’t have to worry about department heads, or the future, or lying about being a malfunction! because you’re deleted, right? right! good job! bots! no! stop, he’s escaped! party time! oh, wait a minute… the air is better here! beer, tea… i’m coffee! sorry… ish… so ish e. my old cube! ugh, pinkeye. mike! my name’s not mike… ah! there’s AV bots coming! what, me? just because i’m in the wrong section? holy toledo! what do we do? quick! this way! let’s go! don’t tell anyone you’re about to see this. they’ll never find us down here. where are we? the basement? nope. welcome to the loser lounge, where the emo gees who never get used, hang out. go fish! fishcake with swirls sweep so you won’t cry. sweep so you won’t cry. sweep so you won’t cry. i almost got deleted! me! high five! hey, what’s up high five? they weren’t trying to delete you, they were trying to delete me. you? what’s so important about you that they’d send out an entire team of bots? they say… i’m a malfunction. gasp oh, you bringing malfunctions in here now, high five? for crying out loud, abandoned luggage, that had better not be my leftover chinese food… uh… what chinese food? huh ha! do you have any idea what it’s like to be living large? hashtag blessed? the favorite of the favorites, and then demoted to this pit of despair? here, will you hit my callouses for me? at least you’re a working emoji, that’s all i ever wanted. well, if that’s all it will take you to be satisfied, then just find a hacker and get reprogrammed. it’s not that complicated. where would i find a hacker? in the piracy app, duh. ugh. and who took my clear nail polish? piracy app? to get there, i mean, i have to leave textopolis. so? i’ve done it. would you be a brother. one of the princess emo gees left the phone altogether, now she lives on the cloud… mmm… ooh, that is good. i’m sure the hacker that helped her do that could easily reprogram you. The name’s jailbreak. jailbreak? that’s great? reprogrammed. i just need to get reprogrammed, and then i can finally be the meh i was meh to be! help me find that hacker high five, will you? please? maybe this hacker can help you, too? like, rewrite some code? get you into the favorites sections? wait a minute! ow. i’ve been trying to use my charisma and sensitive entitlement to get me back on top when all I need is a hacker! today’s your lucky day! let’s roll! hey, can i come too? talk to the hand, bretheren. i thought i was… bye, felicia. ciao, fishcake with swirls. daddy’s headed back to the VIPs where he belongs! wait, what about the bots? good point, good point. ow, ow ow, ow… hey… i shouldn’t have picked the cactus. i shouldn’t have picked it. you didn’t even try to get the tree, it’s baffling. let’s go. high five? hello? high five! where are you? i’m right here! here we are! end of the text aisle. no way. come on, gene, it’s perfectly safe! ah! gene, help me! high five! oh no, this is all my fault, high five, I… i’m just messing with you! it’s just one of those rubber finger monster puppets from the eighties, i collected the whole set! alright, you coming? uh, what do i do? what do you mean? just take a step through the other side. this, is it. the next time i come back here, i’ll be a real meh. high five? woah! are you finished? where, where are we? welcome… to the wallpaper! wow. this place is incredible! each app is a whole new world. ow, that’s my face, get off my face, thank you. what is this place? WeChat! it’s like a whole other world! oh, it is. what are they? they’re bubble pups, they might be cute, but man, are they clean. bubble pups? they’re stickers, gene, try to get with the program? this is so cool! wait, what’s in that one! everybody’s talking about themselves! how does he know so many people? none of these people know him, but they like him, and that’s what matters in this life, popularity. uh, i, i think i’d rather just have a real friend. a real friend? how’s that going to get you anywhere? what you need are fans! they give you complete and unrelenting support! as long as you’re on top. poor gene, i blame myself. i blame you, too. i just wanted to be supported. you just wanted a vacation. you take that back, mel. bots, they haven’t found gene by now. he must have skipped town. you mean the wallpaper? our boy’s on the run. how about we find him ourselves? yeah, sure. tell those bots to follow those mehs. i’m sure they’ll know about all those freaky deaky apps Gene would hide out in. i’m really good at making plans, you guys, right? here we are, the piracy app! this is where we’ll find jailbreak. um, but this is, the dictionary app. that’s just what alex wants his parents to think. this is called a skin. really? what could a teenage boy possibly want to hide from his parents? just try to keep up, this place can get a little rough. ahoy mateys, look who’s back! high five! i’m a bit of a celebrity here, always welcome. ow! loser! come on, follow me. oh, great, emo gees! i thought the conversation just got dumber. ugh, internet trolls, just ignore them. eventually, they’ll get a job, or a girlfriend, or some sort of purpose in life, and then they’ll stop. virus, we’ll just, we’ll just walk over this way… hi! it’s so great to see you again! do i know you? it’s spam! just sign here and i can get you special discounts on vitamins and coupon offers that can save you up to 25 percent! 25 percent? nonono no no, don’t get sucked in! back off, spam! it’s the only way to do it. back off! thank you very much! you can illegally download our CD right here! hey, trojan horse, how are you? yeah, what’ll it be had? i’ll have a bottle of… hack, daniels, hmm? maybe with a plate of… cheese, and hackers, kapeesh? you try to buy a hacker, you can just ask, you know. oh, sorry, um, yes. we’re looking for a hacker named jailbreak. oh, i know a guy who could hook you up. right over there. oh, yes. patable. no, not him. her! wait, he’s a she? hey! jailbreak! mind if we join in? yes. that’s the thing about the internet, is that you never know if someone’s being ironic or sincere. i sincerely, unironically want you to go away. ha ha ha ha, so good… so here’s the thing, my friend gene here has a little problem. well, see, i’m supposed to be a meh, but i don’t really feel… yeah, yeah, and we thought that you could help… the princess, you know, off the phone… woah, hold up, that’s not a meh face. bots, they’re after me! how are you doing that? look, it’s just something that i can do, can you help us? follow me. bots, delete my history! i need to wipe my entire hard drive! i made the most delicious cinnamon buns! maybe if there was something to uh, jog my memory? come on! move! hey trolls, wipe our mailbox wearing a tuxedo! hi, it’s so great to see you again! this tunnel will get us out of here! move! get us out of here! move! did that cloud taste sweet to you? ow. ow. ow. help me. help, i’m stuck! sweet motherboard! where am i? candy crush! get me out of here! hey, cornface! try getting him out the top! already on it! hold tight, gene! woah! woah! this feels very off.. and smells. i mean, it smells delicious, but, i still don’t like it! the game obviously thinks you’re a candy, even though you’re, weirdly misshapen, you know? what do i do? stay very still! don’t worry, we’ve got your back! right, high five? hey, fingers! you wanna focus? for your information, i happen to have a sugar addiction, and it’s a very, serious… hey, finger head, we have to get Gene out of the game without blowing him up! i don’t want to blow up! we have to match up the candies so that Gene will drop to the bottom. and we can’t match him with any yellows, or else… oh! don’t do that, please don’t do that. watch. got it? knock 3 in a row, don’t blow gene up, got it. and, we have to be careful. yeah yeah yeah. careful! woo hoo! candy! yo! no no no! don’t do yellow! do NOT do the yellow! i said careful! hey, addie! i… i was just wondering, if, you are… tasty. what? um… delicious. excuse me? sweet. hey addie! uh… hi nikki. see you later, alex sugar crush. ah! i’m so over this. Wireless Repair Service, how may I help you? i’d like to make an appointment. it’s like this phone is playing games with me! woah! hey, what does this do? get me out of here! ooh… suck it in… stop it… stop it… ow ow ow… it’s not working! well, there’s one option left. we line you up with the yellows. but you said not to do that! special candies get transported to that jar. the game might think that you’re a special candy. and… what if it doesn’t think i’m a special candy? well… ah! jailbreak, hello? hello, jailbreak? uh, sorry. what if it doesn’t think i’m a special candy? oh, i’m not too worried about it. alright, just do it. gene, gene! you’re alive! you were trying to see if i had somehow turned into candy, weren’t you? yes i was. and you have not! hey, looks like something popped up on alex’s calender. ah, i’m sure it’s nothing. uh, alex made an appointment at the phone store? calm down, everyone, calm down. don’t worry, everything is fine. maybe alex just wants to buy some accessories. uh, his appointment is with techinical support. well, i’m sure we’ll have plenty of time to figure this out. uh, his appointment is for tomorrow. then maybe it’s just for some routine maintenance? uh, actually, it’s to erase the phone. listen, gene, i’m about to become your knight in shining armor. you are? oh yeah. but first, we need to get uploaded to the cloud. that’s where we’ll find the source code to reprogram you. the… cloud? isn’t that off the phone? ding dingding ding! you got it! mmhm, yeah, the cloud! off the phone! uh! we’re in candy crush, oz, i know a shortcut to just dance, which is right next to dropbox, where we can get uploaded to the cloud. mmhm, of course, just go dive into the dropbox and vroom! hold up, here’s the stinker. before they let us into the cloud, we have to get past this… firewall. the firewall uses face identification. it’s really annoying, because i’ve already tried to get through. guessed wrong once, and now i’m locked out for life. locked out for life? you’re thinking, because i can make different faces, the firewall will think i’m different emo gees! yeah, i wanted to say it, because it was my idea. you know, women are always coming up with stuff that men are taking credit for. you know what, well, let’s hit the road. high five, you coming? i’m coming! why do i always think i’m going to come around on black licorice? ah! oh! my precious… move it! sudden death, here we come! let’s try this one… you tube? wow, what an original treat, and i don’t even need a remote. that guy is so expressive. he reminds me of gene. yes, something’s really wrong here. our son is a malfunction, and you should have never let him go into that cube. don’t blame me for that now, i am hopping mad at you. see? mary, i think we’re being followed, but don’t overreact. uh oh. i told you not to overreact. what are you doing now? i could be in there for hours. hey, where are you going. i think we should go our seperate ways, mel. i thought i knew the meh that i married, but maybe i don’t. but, mary? this tunnel will help us avoid the bots. thanks for helping us. it’s really, really nice of you. NPD, dude. you’re helping me! move along, move it, why so slow? high five, stop, why are you getting so close? back off. i can’t stop now, i’m having a sugar rush! i’m going to go around you. if i stop moving, my heart’s going to explode! coming through, jailbreak! watch out! hey! watch it, knuckle butt! i can’t feel my face! ha ha! jailbreak, you said back there that i’m… helping you. i’ve been trying to get past that firewall for months! ha ha ha ha ha, come on, come on, the faster we go, the faster I can become a favorite! ah ha ha ha ha ha! woo hoo! look at me i just want to bounce out of here, get off the phone, and live on the cloud! hee hee! ow! what just happened! you know, you don’t like it here? there are so many rules here! what is up with that? the cloud’s supposed to be amazing, it’s full of dreams too… oh, sugar crash. i can’t hold on anymore. catch me, gene, catch me! and you can be whoever you want! thanks. we’re free! come on! oh, oh my gosh, my hands are sweating. you know what, come to think of it, i don’t really remember there ever being a hacker emoji. oh, um, you know, you’re taking too much of my brain space, let’s try to keep the chit chat to a minimum. ooh, someone likes you. what are you talking about? this just like when peace sign gave me just one finger, i knew she was in love with me. let’s go! ugh, i’m never eating another piece of candy ever again… high-five, don’t do it! don’t you do it! it’s already been in there once. don’t do it. wow. move it! are my fingers getting fat? i’ll tell you what, this bandage wasn’t so tight before. okay, we get through this app, and dropbox is right on the other side. we just need to keep it super DL in here. and no matter what, we can’t, turn it, on. OMG this turned it on! what? i’m a hand, it’s a big red button! woah. no no no no! what’s happening! welcome to just dance! follow my moves and you get to move forward! do the wrong moves and you get an X! three strikes and you’re out! out? what does she mean by out? digital death. thanks to you, fingers, now we’re going to have to dance our way out. which is alright with me, because I can shake it like michael. or michael’s glove, anyway. Are you ready to daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnccccccee? this is bad, gene, i can’t dance, i got no groove! come on, everybody can dance! not me, okay? i’m really stiff… see? you don’t… understand? okay, no no. stop, stop. you have to stop. i see now what you are saying? just follow her moves. ready to dance in three! this i can’t do! two! dude! just shut up and… dance! i’m just doing it! hee hee! shamon! jailbreak! i got you! look, just do the music, express yourself! dance? yeah, you got it! now throw some sauce on that dance burrito! woo hoo! i’m doing it! i’m finally nailing this dance! you got it! hee hee! oh ho ho! great job! now you’re moving on to free dance! impress us with your moves to move forward! more dancing? you’re killing it, gene! nice! take it gene! you can break it! wait a minute! i’ve never seen that dance before! what’s it called? the emoji… bob? i love it! you do! everybody! do the emojiiiiiiiiiii bob! ha ha ha! woo! oh! princess! woah! you’re the princess emoji! you never got off the phone! new player! who? oh no! we gotta go! no worry, they’re robots, they can’t dance! downloading thought protocol… can’t dance, he says. heh. hey alex, you gonna dance for us? alex, that’s extra homework for you. yeah, alex’s getting wicked, ha ha ha… alex must be deleting the app! watch out! we gotta get out of here! come on! hoo! this song is my jam! high five! come on! let’s go! hurry! gene! i got you! gene! gene… hey, wait a minute, where’s high five? alex trashed the app.. and high five right along with it. wait, what? wait, trashed? high five is in the trash? he wanted to dance… but, i knew it was a bad idea… i’m so sorry… we gotta get him out of there. gene, dropbox is right here, we have to get to the cloud! and the trash is on the other side of the phone! we don’t know how many other bots are out there! i’m sorry! no, wait! i can’t go without high five. i don’t care how far away it is. gene… that’s my friend down there. i’m not going to just let him get deleted. what, what is it? i’ve always just thought, you’ve got to look out for number one… but what good is it to be number one, if there aren’t any other numbers? wow, okay. i’m sorry, this is, this is my malfunction, i just, i can’t be meh about anything, this is why i’m going to be reprogrammed. well, actually, it’s kinda cool. wait, really? no, i think i know a shortcut. we can take the music streams in spotify. let’s go give that big hand a hand. come on! now it’s trashed the just dance app, and our bots are offline, and it’s giving me a real headache… i am so angry! i really need to stay happy. can we please lighten the mood? no one can resist la fiesta! ole! not that happy. ow! we’ve only got four hours before alex’s phone appointment. if they find a malfunction on the phone, we are all going to be wiped! she said wiped! aim higher, steven. i didn’t want to have to do this, but it is fun to press buttons. the illegal upgrade! now that makes me happy! ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! i just want to dance.. dance… argh! quiet, you saucy gypsy. ugh, where am i? hi! it’s so great to see you again! you’re in the trash, fingers for brains! get away from me, troll! hi! it’s so great to see you again! i’ve got to get out of here. you can’t! and at the end of the day, the trash gets emptied, and we’re all going to die! oh no, no, no! this is the last face you will ever see! this is spotify? yep, every one of those streams is a different song. is it safe? are you sure that this is a good idea? that’s the point of the wave, dude! can we at least pick a… a colorless stream? okay buzzkill… alex, a bunch of people are hitting the promenade, and i think addie might be there, too… that’s perfect! i have an appointment down there, anyway! i’ve got to get this phone fixed! hey, bubble butt! yeah. ah, much better. so, i gotta ask, is it true that when a princess whistles, birds fly down from the skies.. hello, stereotype, that is a complete and total myth! i’m sorry. did you realize that in the first emoji set, a woman can either be a princess, or a bride? that’s why I need to get to the cloud, where you can be whatever you want to be! get ready! whale song coming! wait, wait, whale what? whale song! from alex’s biology DVD! woah! wow! woah! ha ha ha ha. you’re not going to see that sitting around in a cube. funny, you went out of the cube, and I went in. gene, that means you can’t be yourself. what’s the point? you know, i think you’re pretty cool just the way you are. we’re, we’re going to need this. nobody knows, the touchscreen dramascene. nobody knows my screenshot… trash? me? i used to be somebody. here i am, in an old email Alex never sent. addie, blah blah blah blah blergh… and then there’s me! high five! right there! doing my job! FYI, nobody cares about you. just leave me, troll, and let me die! in this dump alone! let me look for the world’s smallest violin in here, so that you can play it! is that the hand angel of mercy? has she finally come for me? give me your hand! i mean, give me yourself! take my hand, angel! i’m ready to take my place amongst the other great hands of the past. it’s me, gene! gene? the one and only. gene! i got him! take me with you! high five! let go of me! you’d leave me down here? you were wrong, troll, people do care about me! and i’m not upset, troll! do you see how not upset I am? gene! you came back for me! you saved me… it wasn’t just me, jailbreak helped, too. she’s a hugger. give her a squeeze. oh, nonono no. not really, nothing great. i’m not feeling your feelings, relieve me! you filthy trolls, I inhaled your stench, and I was once one of you, so I feel your pain. so now, go. be free! smooth sailing from here. huh ha ha! ugh. gene! gene… gene? are you insta gramming? oh, where is my gene… oh, mary, you’ve really done it this time. no, you haven’t. mel? what are you doing in alex’s trip to france album? i was looking for you. none of this is your fault, mary. it’s mine. what do you mean? is that a tear on your cheek? it’s my fault gene is the way he is. i have other expressions, too. i think they’ve just been buried away. but with gene going missing, and thinking i might have lost you, too… oh, mel, why didn’t you tell me? i didn’t know myself. right now, i’m so overwhelmed with passionate feelings for you. mary, my love for you burns with the intensity of a red hot flame. oh, i like it. let’s go find our son. together. we’ll always have paris, mary. so you’re a princess. so you have a little tiara, very fancy. is it true when a princess whistles, birds fly that’s what i said! no, guys, that’s a stupid myth! what awkward virgin haven are you living in? go read an e-book! educate yourself! uh, jailbreak? what the? what is that? smiley must have upgraded her bots! let’s get out of here before it… hi, do you remember me, it’s smiler! i’m coming to you live from the amphitheater, why don’t you come back to textopolis and we can talk through our differences, okay? my friend here will escort you, alright, i’m gonna see you soon, buddy, bye now! we’re actually going to delete them in front of everyone. psst, it’s still on. it’s still on? oh! jiminy, attack the frauds! seperate! take a look! jailbreak! gene! this way! it’s still onto me! over here! let’s go! we have to make it to dropbox! yes! no! go low! woah! don’t worry, it can’t get in. it’s illegal malware, and this app is secure. come on. welcome to dropbox! you are about to leave the phone. remain seated, please! permanecer sentados por favor! might want to hang on! why do they call it dropbox, anyway? oh, this is why! i see why now! i’d better not see that candy corn again! we made it! you guys, chill. we still have to get past… that. oh… shaw. welcome to the firewall, how may I help you? alright, here goes! what should I do? sit in the corner, and don’t say a word. keep those soft fingers to yourself. yes, your majesty, princess of nightmares! now gene, step onto the password icon, and i’ll feed you the passwords. okay. okay. ten, eleven, two thousand and two. ten, eleven, two thousand and two. ow. cough. access denied. okay, try a different expression. is it going to blast me every time i messed up? yeah, kind of. what do you mean kind of? ready? welcome to the firewall. his favorite food. chimichangas! chimichangas? ow. access denied. huh. this might take a while. oh boy. krav maga! krav maga. major lazer! major lazer. what did i do now? ow. skate, or die! access denied. denied. denied. denied. i don’t get it! we’ve tried all of the important things in alex’s life! his favorite pet, his sport, his favorite grandma… i’m sorry, gene. i let us all down. now, if I had to come up with a password, I’d probably use the name of a girl I like. i’ve been all over the phone! he’s never mentioned a girl. yes he has! hi. when I was in the trash, I read a very interesting email, but, i’m just a dunce, in the corner, forbidden to speak… what email? sorry, what? what email? uh, took it out, at school, he was declaring his feelings of love for her, i guess instead of sending it he tossed it in the trash. high five, this is very important. what is her name? her name, yes! excellent question. it… was… tina. karen. marge. lint, lindsay. ack, allison. sarah, or, lupita. i want to say lupita, but that doesn’t feel right, now i’m saying it out loud. ugh.. gotta find that email, i think i can access the trash. i got it! addie! yes! yes, that’s it, addie! i knew i’d get there! dear addie, you and I, we are like diamonds in the sky. you’re a shooting star I see. a vision, ecstacy. shining bright like a diamond. he used a high-five, see? guess now we know why he trashed it. ooh, shade. guys, should we try this? addie! access granted. oh snap. this place, is, amazing. wow, i can’t believe it. woah. one little emoji could sure get lost in a place like this. i… i guess we should, make you, a meh before that bot comes back home. oh, oh, so we’re gonna do that now. we had a deal, right? yeah, okay. right. i, uh, guess i’ll start hacking. ha! we did it, gene! all our dreams are coming true! i’ll be alex’s favorite again, and you’ll be a real meh! ha ha, yeah! do the hand dance. do the hand dance. and pinky. pop it with the pinky. pop it with the pinky. yeah, but this all seems kinda super fast now, doesn’t it? i didn’t expect to be having these feelings right now. well, maybe you should go and express them while you still can. so, uh, i’ve been thinking, um, ever since we. jailbreak, you’re the coolest, most interesting emoji i’ve ever met. and, after all the adventures that we’ve had, i’m just not sure that i want all of that to go away. because, my feelings, right now, are, like, huge. i just think that they could be enough for me to want to stay the way that I am. if it means that i could stay here, with you, like, forever. forever and ever. and ever. maybe longer than that, even? like in the fairy tales. uh… wait, wuh, what is that? gene, if this is about you deciding not to be meh, then, i am all about that. i like you just the way you are, but i had a plan. right. i’m not just some princess, gene, waiting for my prince. i mean, uh, what you said was beautiful, but, gene… ha ha ha! you’re all… meh! the source code worked! turns out I didn’t need it. for the first time in life, meh is all I feel. oh! gene! i have an appointment. i’m a little early. no prob. i can take you right now. jailbreak! ah! don’t do that! that freaking huge bot has got gene back inside the phone! what? he left being more meh than the meh-est meh face i’ve seen! what did you say to him? it’s what I didn’t say. we gotta go get him. how are we going to get there in time before he gets deleted? ugh.. i can’t believe i’m doing this. you tell anyone you saw this and I’ll crack more than those knuckles. woah. birds do like princesses! it’s not a myth! it’s not a myth at all! what happened with becoming a favorite? because i’d rather have one real friend. let’s go get him. i can’t wait to see that emoji’s face! look at that expression! is that for realizing that you’ve put all of textopolis at risk? causing Alex to question our reliability? hmm? hey, now that’s going too far, even for me! if we could delete this malfunction, before he gets dissapointed, Alex will realize there’s nothing wrong with the phone. and any last words? meh. well, it’s too late for that. delete him! wait! you delete gene, you’ll have to delete me, too. what? i have the same malfunction gene has. dad? oh gosh, i don’t know what to do! yes i do! BOTS! sorry misses meh. wow. i did not see that one coming. smiler, I think you might be making too much stink out of all this. oh really? how about you’re next? i was wrong, gene. i should have believed in you all along. oh, what a touching daddy son reunion moment! it reminds me of the time I deleted you both! oh wait! that’s this time! delete the two malfunctions! How’s that for an entroof gasp oh, great. I can’t reach! oh no! what did you do to my beautiful monst Ow my tooth! hand, button! jailbreak? oh, gene… you really are a meh… what happened to looking out for number one? being number one doesn’t matter if there aren’t any other numbers. alex’s appointment! he’s deleting the phone! nononono no no no no! show me alex. are you sure you want to delete everything? do it! red alert! alex, no! game over. fellas, i’m afraid this is the last call. dude, addie’s here. you should go over. every time I try, i screwed up! i don’t even know how to tell her how I feel! if we help alex connect to addie, maybe he won’t delete us. i might be able to bypass the wipe and get a text through to him. but we’ll only have time to send one. maybe I should go! he has love in his eyes. send me! alex looks nervous, too! he’s more shy than nervous! stop! it’s gene. he’s all of those things! emo gees should only be one thing! oh, really? gasp the princess! linda? not now, mom! gene, you got this. that’s not me anymore. but I have to try. it’s starting! no! it’s ending! almost in? working on it! mom? dad? no.. i’m in! last time I was in this cube I screwed everything up. gene, why do you think I came back? it’s because of you. me. it’s all inside of you, gene. just try to bring it back. and do you. high five! i don’t want to wave goodbye! it’s now or never, gene! jailbreak, now! woah! she got this emoji! no way! hey, i got your text! that’s one super cool emoji! i know, right? a lot of feelings in one! i get it! i like that you’re one of those guys who actually expresses feelings! yeah, that’s me! so, do you think you cou yes, i’d love to go to the dance with you. we made it! oh, i could have lost you, peter pinky finger… oh, you wretchy ring finger, even you, tiberius thumb… change your mind? yeah, maybe it’s weird, but i’m going to hold onto it. gene, you did it! you saved us all! oh, mel… gee hee eene! gee hee hee heene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! gene! and us! and high five! and high five! and high five! and high five! hey, what happened, gene? slap me some skin! and a little orange for the pinky! hey high five! save a little hand for later! unless you know the hamburger! back on top of the hand pile! you’re not on the list! wait, what? what’s going on? ha! from now on, everyone is welcome! wait, what is all this? it’s for you, gene! everybody! the emoji bob! this is so jazzy… go eggplant! go eggplant! go eggplant! we are out of Alex’s pocket, emo gees! this is not a butt dial! to your cubes! are we up and running? roger that. good, because we got incoming! looks like it’s gonna be gene. hey gene, ready to try out your new cube? in 3, 2…

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0iqgremlin · 7 years ago

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I wrote the best fanfic ever

#Fanfic #reader insert

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harryhenry1 · 7 years ago

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#long post #the emoji movie #copypasta

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telnaga · 7 years ago

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unpopular opinion

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pastawaves · 7 years ago

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4gd2 · 7 years ago

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Het mooiste verhaal ter wereld

#trash #submission

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scholar-of-the-abyss · 7 years ago

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#Emoji movie

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jawololo · 7 years ago

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HECK

#sorry not sorry #long ass post

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