#still haven't done that
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thinkign about outer wilds again....
#pharaoh rambles#I remember saying like a month ago I would put my emotions about this game into words#still haven't done that#don't know if I will ever be able to do that#it's just#SUCH a good game#outer wilds#play outer wilds#please#for me
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pspspspsps poetry mutuals come here... new quiz... making you the patron saint of something...
#not its final form. but i'll edit it tomorrow lmao i want the mutuals to have access to it Now#rebloggable still!!! if this post spreads around that'd be really cute actually. people can see it now#nd i'll tell you all when i make it better later <3#time to remember all the little tags that i use for these. haven't done one of these since my other saint quiz fucking Forever ago#uquiz#quiz#quizzes#uquiz link#uquiz quiz#uquizzes#my uquizzes#quiz link#my quizzes
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Asks are closed again~
Man, I wish i had to close my art commissions as frequently as i need to shut my writing commissions.
But! You read that right! I need to close the ask box once again to actually make a dent in the very big asks ya'll gave me. Usually I don't close it in what feels like such a short time, but I've got some aks that are shaping up to be big ol' beasties to write. So, I'm saving myself the absolute insanity of trying to keep up.
Don't worry though! I'll, of course, open them again! When i get through the ocean of a to-do list lol.
#update#asks are closing#This way I can focus on really writing some good set ups and stuff as well!#I also lowkey need to recharge after being sick#still haven't done that#maybe i shouldn't launch myself into complex threesomes just yet lol
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a buncha okami thumbnails I've done for my playthrough!
#okami#art#digital art#will I ever post something else other than thumbnails?#maybe#probably yes actually#once I have some art to show#but I haven't done anything personal in a hot sec (if it ain't fanart)#so thumbnails be upon ye!!#I've been slowly chipping away at okami and I still can't get over how beautiful it is
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i said that gale and cyra have disaster romcom energy and now it's all i can think about
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#galemance#gale dekarios#tav#i think it falls under miscommunication trope bc she's SO hard to read that he would think she's fucking with him#but no she genuinely wants to know every reason he disliked that book#in this au she actually has a phd instead of just being. a weird lady#she's still a weird lady but she's licensed now#also idk if it's registered bc i haven't done a lot of comics with her but i see her a lot like elizabeth zott from lessons in chemistry
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
Plain-text version:
Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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meow
#narilamb#cotl lamb#cotl narinder#the one who waits#cult of the lamb#my art#digital#these are so lazy lmao i still wanted to put in a little more effort#i haven't done full digital illustrations in so long help
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trying to get back into drawing... by drawing them from memory ;w;
#paper craft#isat#in stars and time#isat fanart#siffrin#isat siffrin#isabeau#isat isabeau#bonnie#isat bonnie#odile#isat odile#mirabelle#isat mirabelle#loop#isat loop#the family#i'm so tired...#i have had the post-canon bonnie redesign finished for quite a while btw :( just haven't done the doodles or sprite edits...#i have isa mostly done but i'm stuck w the earring still#siffrin's already been 'designed' but i haven't started the lil matching ref shet
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The standard @drawfee experience ❤️
Saw that meme going around from Myszka on Twitter and knew that I had to render the gremlin crew. Original under the cut
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#I haven't done any caricature work in a long time and I am unreasonably proud of how recognizable everyone looks here haha#reminder that this is still kinda a Drawfee blog too lmao#this was so fun to draw guys I think I enjoy making art again? been having a like 6 month streak this feels amazing#drawfee#drawfee show#drawfee fanart#jacob andrews#julia lepetit#nathan yaffe#karina farek#drawfee art#silly#meme#shitpost#dilfosaur#miss misnomer
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i'm ready to try
#This drawing is kind of personal to me#I recently graduated (CUM LAUDE WOOOO!!!!) and its like. not to get depressing#but when i was younger i was never sure whether i would make it to this point#When i was going through what i consider to still be like. the worst time of my entire life#This fictional character was there for me and she was something for me to latch onto and cope with#eGem helped me a lot with being able to process my emotions at the time but also helped me to reflect on myself#which i think is a big reason as to why I'm really happy with where i am with myself right now#I'm going off to uni next school year to study astronomy!!! which!!!#Im also doing because of eGem!!! She ignited this kind of childlike wonder for space for me#I love doing math and physics and whilst Im still a bit scared because. honestly i don't know whether this is what i want to do with my lif#I think i'll be okay either way#either way i wanted to draw egem again even if i haven't done so in a while because its like#i think i wouldnt be who i am without her. i think i'd be a lot worse off#so like. thank you empires smp thank you geminitay thank you egem This drawing is me expressing my gratitude#AND THANK YOU AUTISM!#empires smp#empires smp s1#empiresblr#esmp#geminitay#art#fanart#alice.art#mcyt#mcytblr#song is andromeda by weyes blood... obv.. you guys know me by now :oP
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oops!!!!!!!! accidentally caught the script up to msq!!!!
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i honestly did not think this was going to be possible with the amount of time left after i finished 6.0, but here we are!!!!!!!
the entire msq, at your fingertips!!!!!!!!!
please know that i will NOT be doing dawntrail's MSQ immediately after it drops though. i want to enjoy playing through for the first time without making it into a job. i hope to get to it before TOO too long, though 💖
#i'm not sure if i missed any characters hiding around the world with specific post-6.55 dialogue; i only checked around old sharlayan#but i haven't done any of the other post-patch hiding npcs so completionism there is for a future run#(unless you know of any specific ones i missed; if so please lmk)#and of course i'm still missing all of the usual things#like conditional dialogue for optional content like the extra gaia scene in 6.5#i'll get there eventually!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hope#ff#ffxiv#ew#xiv script
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... and he was eager moreover to discover all that he could concerning Mankind. He it was that first met Men in Beleriand and befriended them; and for this reason he was often called by the Eldar Edennil, 'the Friend of Men'. (Athrabeth Finrod ah Andreth)
(partially inspired by this)
#small disclaimer: i still haven't completed my annual silm reread#so this mayyyy be a little bit inaccurate#i was having so many thoughts about finrod and the edain again so i couldn't stop myself :)#but!#clarisse! you may ask. whats up with the hands being so realistic but they still have cartoon faces#i don't know. i respond. im at that stage of drawing#you know how sometimes you draw something and stare it for too long and you start having a crisis of whether it was even a good idea#like i've been working on this for the past week! and have no idea if it's even comprehensible#however. i am done with it and methinks is time to release it to the wild#clarisse doodles#tolkien#the silmarillion#finrod felagund#finrod#beor the old#house of beor#baran#andreth#beren
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DTIYS for @tizeline
Congrats on 10k!!! (love your artstyle btw sooo soft and beautiful i wanna look at your art all day!)
The original outfit was perfect but I still felt like something was missing...
#my art#art#dtiys#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise leo#rise donnie#rottmnt donnie#rottmnt leo#april o'neil#rottmnt april#wow first time drawing her#she's beautiful#i don't really like how i drew donnie here((#i think i could've done better(#i'm too tired to do anything else with this art so#tiz sep au#oh god i haven't read it yet#at least not all of it#you see#there's this thing#when i find something exciting that i wanna read/watch i instead just run around it for months thinking about it preparing to dive into it#before i actually do it#i don't know why#i did this with cass au for nearly a YEAR because i was SO excited i couldn't sit still to read#anyway#did i tell you how much i like your art?
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“… it would ease my heart, if while the Sun yet shines, I could see you still.”
#lotredit#tolkienedit#lord of the rings#eowyn x faramir#eowynedit#faramiredit#eowyn of rohan#faramir of gondor#lotr#eowyn#faramir#eowyn and faramir#*#idk what this is lol#pj WHERE is the faramir in the houses of healing footage. i know it's out there; i've seen the stills#i don't need an extended extended edition bc i know that a lot of stuff they cut truly was unnecessary#but i WOULD like a blu-ray set with whole bonus discs devoted to deleted scenes. hello is this thing on#Éowyn x Faramir#otp: though they did not know it#need to get my eowyn/faramir sideblog active; i made it but haven't really done anything with it
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You're not fooling me again, are you? // If you don't stay true to me after this, you'll find out how I deal with liars.
#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#firstkhaotung#joongdunk#kantbison#fadelstyle#asianlgbtqdramas#esmetracks#userrlana#uservix#userspicy#tuserrowan#khaotunq#userjamiec#raeblr#forfive#userrzey#*#*thk#sorry if someone has done this. i did try and check but i still haven't watched yesterday's ep so i was also trying not to spoil myself
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something something the main cargo of the tulbar being mouthwash and its main advertising slogan being 'kills 99% of germs without leaving a bad taste'
something something Jimmy desperate to remove the rest of the crew and his mistakes, so far as to try and crash the ship so he doesn't have to face what he did to Anya, killing 99% of germs and bacteria everyone and himself so he won't have to face the bad taste in his mouth consequences of it all
something something eating curly to survive, feeding curly to himself to survive, the fact that human cannabalism infects you in a way you can't heal (prion disease), something something mouthwash will rinse it out, something something have your terrible actions and the consequences they bring without feeling guilty if you just wash it down with delusions mouthwash
something along those lines
#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#catfish speaks#mouthwashing jimmy#mouthwashing curly#i still havent seen many people talk about the mouthwash at all#its maybe such a small part of the main story and uncovered pretty early but i think its so important#given the game is called mouthwashing#like ive seen people mention the removes germs bit but not anything else#especially not yue fact that mouthwash is designed to clean and leave a nice taste#almost like you had a bad taste in your mouth you wanted to get rid of#actions youd done that you dont want yo take responsibility for#idk i wanna see more analysis abiut it! i think its so clever!!!#granted i haven't been looking#but this is an open invitation for people to talk aboit it yo me#please
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