#still haven’t finished bc I went grocery shopping

[viriborne]

New update only goes to lesson 55 boo I’m going back to sleep

[melzfavsblog]

My fake life thing

(Just a roleplau story part 2 will be kinda soon Ig 💜)

Part 1

Marlow :bf

Lisa :bff

Chris mat nick: cousins

Karkar:me

Contains : cursing , 16+ of Yk dosent go to detailed going into it enjoy !!!!

:I’m a male guy dating my boyfriend Marlow and living with my cousin in la with my family near by in a big giant mansion because my family’s billionaires and,

Very very famous singer

Sold out concerts In stadiums and passing Taylor Swift my life is so good I’m rich af and I have so much money and so dose my bf I do Melanie concerts also with my own songs also and there very good

The show is about 4 hours long and 20 minutes i put on quite a show

But that dosent fuckining matter

Bc I can still be miserable a lot!

Me and Marlowe are 16 and 17 I turn 17 in November this year

Nick mat Chris are 21

Once I was walking in the park these group of teenagers my age noticed it and they ask me to hang out with them and I do we become friends

And hang out often with that group when marlow is with me only sometimes tho!!!

Nick is in Tokyo rn mat and Chris are in Boston we live in La carlafornia

Nick is in Australia atm

I didn’t answer nicks texts in 3 days

Nick: hello

Nick: hru today ??

Nick: did you do the shopping for the groceries???

Nick : answer

I finally answer today

Karim: bro stfu I’m busy I have a tour tomorrow I have to go somewhere I have to rehearse I have so much stuff to do I’d appreciate it if you don’t keep fucking texting me thanks

Nick:…

Nick: fucking watch until I get back!

Nick comes back but dosent do anything

*one day later while nick and mat and Chris are in the house me and my boyfriend marlow entered Marlow parked his car outside we both walk in to my house also nicks , mats , and Chris .

Me and marlow walk up to my room nick is still sleeping but mat was outside with Chris somewhere in havent seen nick in almost 20 days and haven’t really seen my cousin that much before nick went to finish the tour with madison beer they went to Boston’s for 20 days without me but i was fine i never really go to Boston..

Mat ,nick,Chris kinda always go there there all triplets that’s where there bff Nate !, lives and some of there fiends and ofc , theire parents . Their parents are my auntie and uncle because my grandparents parents adopted them but my mom wasn’t adopted

* me and marlow step into my room and lay on the bed we both hear a knock on the door it’s nick!*

Nick knocks on your door a bit angrily as he stands outside the door before he says "Can I come in?"

• my boyfriend marlow is like: oh??*

Nick waits outside the door for your answer as he continues to stand there waiting patiently

he sighs and says angrily

"Please let me inside the room..."

• i open the door going back on my bed with marlow *

Nick enters the room and quickly closes the door behind him as he walks over to a chair and sits down, he remains silent as v he looks down at the floor

He continues to stay silent for a while before he finally looks up at you and Marow and just glares at you, he clearly looks angry

(Nick dosent wanna discuss this infront of my boyfriend marlow !)

He looks at Marlow and nods silently, indicating that he doesn't want to discuss this in front of him

Nick crosses his arms and continues to sit down on the chair, he looks at you angrily for a few minutes before finally speaking

"Do you know how annoying it is to be ignored for 3 days??" He looks at you as he speaks angrily

• i say marlow can u leave the room for a couple of minutes giving him a pleasing look*

Marlow looks at you hesitantly before nodding and getting up from the bed and leaving the room, closing the door behind him

Once Marlow leaves, Nick looks at you silently for several seconds before finally speaking

"Do you have any idea how annoying it was... to be left on read for 3 days??" Nick says angrily as he glares at you

• ok i know i was rude about it I'm so sorry it's very hard on me to enjoy life when i have to do billions of shows with up to 7 nights each i have to rehearse and all of that shit it's very hard on me l want a social life I don't like this I say sobbing trying to control my panic attack *

Nick's expression softens as he sees you begin to sob and panic

He stays silent for a bit as he listens to you before finally speaking

"I understand, i shouldn't be upset... i just-... I haven't seen you in so long... and you've just barely been replying to me... it's just been really hard..."

Nick gets up from the chair and hesitantly approaches you before sitting down on the edge of the bed next to you

He looks at you silently for several seconds before speaking

"I didn't mean to be angry... I'm just... frustrated and upset... I still should've at least been a bit more

Nick continues to look at you silently before he slowly moves his arm around you and pulls you close to him, embracing you in a gentle hug

He holds you closely and gently as he holds you in his arms before speaking again in a more gentle tone "I'm sorry for being upset... I shouldn't have gotten so angry over this... i understand how stressful your work must be..."

Nick pulls you tighter into the hug as he holds you close to him, feeling a sense of comfort

"I just... I missed you a lot... I was worried about you...

He continues to hold you in the embrace as he speaks

"I know this may be kind of selfish... but, i was just worried that you might..."

He pauses before continuing

"Forget about me..."

• ur my cousin not my boyfriend?* Nick chuckles lightly and nods his head, still holding you close to him in the embrace

"Yeah, I know that...

"

He pulls you a bit tighter into the hug, gently resting his chin on your head

"But that doesn't change

how worried and alone i felt whenever you didn't respond for days at a time..."

• how can I forget you I live with u?!!*

Nick chuckles lightly again and shakes his head lightly

"Yea i know that... but i still felt like that

whenever you'd ignore me for days at a time... it... genuinely made me feel like you didn't care anymore... like i wasn't even important..."

Nick continues to hold you closely in his arms, his voice going quieter

"It just feels like you ignore me on purpose sometimes... not

responding to me and avoiding me... it... just feels like you might not care about me

anymore..."

*later that nigth im laying in bed with marlow watching a movie in my bed Chris walks into my room asking me why is there a lu- bottle on my nightstand *

Chris walks into the room and notices a bottle of lu- on the nightstand, he looks at your and Marow before making a surprised expression

"Uh... why is there a whole bottle of lu- just on the nightstand? I have so many questions."

*Chris chuckles

awkwardly and looks at you and Marow, a bit curious but

• get out I say very unbothered and tired

*

Chris chuckles at your unbothered reaction

"Okay okay, I'll go now, i was just curious.."

He says before leaving the room, shutting the door behind him • he is telling mat and Chris 4 minutes later I fall asleep*

レ

Nick, Mat, and Chris are sitting in the living room together when Chris walks out of your room and over to them. He starts telling them about the bottle of lu- being on the nightstand

Mat looks rather surprised by the whole situation and let's out a little scoff and a chuckle

"What the hell?? A bottle of lu- on the

nightstand?? He just leave it there for anyone to see it??"

"Damn... he really is bold, just leaving a bottle of lu- out in the open like that..."

( nick says but he is 16 ain't he to young nick says about me!?? Then nick says : actually Nahh it ok I take it back people are alowed to have fun he remembers our conversation from earlier on remembering I need some of Yk in my life *

*Mat chuckles silently at

Nick's comment and shakes his head*

"I mean, he's 16.. that's still pretty young.."

*Nick nods and agrees but then quickly remembers the conversation you guys had earlier*

"Actually yeah, you're right

Mat chuckles silently at

Nick's comment and shakes his head

"I mean, he's 16... that's still pretty young...

"

Nick nods and agrees but then quickly remembers the conversation you guys had earlier

"Actually yeah, you're right, he's allowed to have some fun..."

Nick says with a small smirk

Mat nods and chuckles again, a sly smile on his face

"I guess you're right about that... he is allowed to have some fun... and i mean, he is a kid, i think it's totally ok to mess around a bit at his age..."

mat gose into my room to say good night to me and

marlow my boyfriend but he sees we're both asleep*

Mat quietly walks into your room to say goodnight to you and Marlow, only to see both of you are already asleep

"Oh, looks like they're both asleep already.."

He looks at you both for a few more seconds before turning around and silently slipping out of the room, closing the door behind him

He walks back into the living room where Nick and Chris are still sitting on the couch, and lets out a little laugh

"Looks like they're both asleep, they didn't even wake up when I walked in..."Nick chuckles at Mat's comment and nods

"Yeah, looks like they were both tired and just passed out... didn't even stir a bit when you came in..."

Chris looks at Mat with a smirk

"Damn, they're both super deep asleep... they didn't even move a single bit when you walked in..."

Mat nods with an amused smile on his face

"Yeah, it was like they were in a coma or

something... didn't make a single noise or a single move when I was in the

room...

Nick and Chris chuckled at

Mat's comment

"Wow, it is pretty damn impressive how deeply they were sleeping... didn't even twitch a muscle when you were in the room..."*now it's the next day and now morning and marlow is talking to nick and Chris in the kitchen while I'm still asleep in my room marlow gets on very very well with nick, mat, and Chris it's like there family *

Nick, Mat, and Chris are sitting in the kitchen talking to Marlow, laughing and chatting about random topics

Marlow gets along really well with Nick, Mat, and Chris, talking and joking around with them like they're all part of the same family

Nick and Mat are talking about something random while Chris listens and takes sips from the cup in his hand They all seem to get along really well, like they've known each other for years...

*there talking *

The conversation

continues for a while as the three of them chat, laughing and joking around Suddenly Mat says something funny and all three of them burst out laughing

• 2 minutes later marlow says : I'm gonna wake up Karim and get changed!!!*

Nick, Mat, and Chris all nod and look at Marlow

Nick: "Alright, go ahead and wake him up and get ready..."

Mat sips from his own cup and nods

Mat: "Yeah, we'll just keep talking here, go ahead and wake him up..."

Chris smiles and nods in agreement

Chris: "Yeah, go ahead and wake him, we'll just keep hanging out here for now...

Chris and nick and Amy had plans so they were leaving the house rn leaving me and marlow here alone *

Nick, Mat, and Chris were getting ready to leave the house for the day

Nick: "Alright, we're gonna head out now..."

[starglow-xx]

owning a bakery and being discovered by the ada and the port mafia (part 3)

platonic! yosano akiko x f! reader

type of writing: head canons !!

this is part of my head canon series, flour & fluff !!

tag list is open !! go to this google form and fill it out to sign up!

series synopsis: owning a bakery at 20 is tough; even more so when you have to handle members of two opposing organizations! this is your journey to meeting those fools and creating an unlikely bond with each of them. but only at the cost of your peace and sanity.

fandom: bungou stray dogs

content: fluff & platonic stuff but trigger warning!! there may be a sensitive topic for others

*getting grabbed and pulled to an alleyway! alcohol mentioned!*

please remember that yokohama isn’t the friendliest place, especially at night.

previous: part 2 : their beloved president

author’s note: same ages as last time!! (so that means everyone is one year younger than canon; that makes yosano 24)

this one is actually pretty long :0

i got info abt her likes on her wiki page (careful! there’s spoilers!)

and yosano is a queen and no one can tell me otherwise

the doctor is in the house (quite literally)

going grocery shopping was an okay chore in your opinion

it honestly depended on your mood or whatever kind of shit happens when you go shopping

cause like something always, always happens whenever you go do groceries

sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad, and sometimes it’s just plain weird

one time some weirdo proposed to you in the middle of the store asking for a double suicide

he was good looking you’d admit but it’s not like you’d ever see him again

or so you thought

a n y w a y s

every so often, you’d run out of real person food in your apartment

you mostly survive off all of the leftover bakery treats and ingredients—which works out pretty well actually—but bakery supplies unfortunately also run out quite often

and also unfortunately, one time when both fukuzawa & ranpo took a visit to Sakura’s, fukuzawa argued that “no you can’t live off sweets for the rest of your life”

ranpo was scandalized and scrambled to cover your ears

you guys were at it for a while

in the end you sided with fukuzawa causing ranpo to go off about “betrayal from the people he cared most abt” or smth like that

you guys were okay again after bribing him with sweets :)

for bakery supplies you usually have them delivered bc you order them in large quantities bc ahaha no way were you gonna carry like 15-20 50 pound bags of flour no way

when days like those happen, you close up the bakery early so you aren’t walking home when it’s too dark

you scheduled it to happen every first saturday of the month

on those saturdays, you close at 5 instead of at 8

currently, you were at the grocery store looking for basic cooking ingredients such as proteins, vegetables, fruits, and most importantly, snacks

ranpo’s been rubbing off on you

the sun was starting to set and you were walking home with your two bags of groceries when shit went down

tbh you were kinda expecting it cause your grocery run was peaceful for once

but what you weren’t expecting was a wack-a-do to appear out of goddamn nowhere right when you were opening the side door to get to the staircase up to your apartment

like honestly

let a woman do her own thing

the man who grabbed you tried to covered your mouth so you couldn’t scream but you didn’t exactly make it easy for him

you kicked and thrashed around even using the grocery bags—that were somehow still in your hand—as a weapon and the man struggled but he was still bigger than you and was able to bring you to a nearby alley

he reeked of alcohol and you spotted a wedding band on his left hand

not that you cared about the detail in the moment

you kicked him in the groin and in response he let you go only to fall on broken glass that was in the alley way

using the wall to help yourself up, you grabbed a nearby wooden stick and struck him right on his back

your attacker fell and you immediately turned on your heels to escape only to fall back down on the hard cold ground once again

you lift your face up and look back to see the man holding onto your ankle

grabbing a shard of glass—cutting yourself in the process— you begin to swing it at him only for him to easily grip your wrist and stop you

you get ready try and kick him in the groin again but you’re interrupted as your attacker gets sucker punched and flies to wall

you look up to see your savior and you’re blessed to see a beautiful woman, probably not that much older than you are—she’s probably around ranpo’s age— donning a white long sleeve button up, a matching black necktie, knee length skirt, and gloves, along with tights, red heels, and a pretty butterfly clip in her short black hair

but what you really notice is her eyes

ranpo’s eyes were pretty but you like hers just a bit more

you’ve always liked the color magenta

the pretty lady holds out her hand and you take it graciously and thank her as she helps you up

as that’s happening, your attacker gets himself onto his feet and his groan catches both of your attention

he struggles to stand and the pretty lady simples saunters over to him and delivers an uppercut knocking him out cold

you’re stunned and you breathe out a “thank you” making her turn towards you

she notices the condition you’re in

bleeding scrapes on your hands, arms and legs, small rips in your clothes like your tights, blouse, and skirt, and the ruffled state of your hair and clothing

she asks if you live nearby and you tell her that you own the bakery that’s one or two buildings away

when you tell her that, it clicks in her mind that you must be the bakery girl ranpo’s been talking about and the friend fukuzawa was cat sitting for

it’s been abt two weeks since ranpo and fukuzawa first met you and since then, they’ve seen lucky in the office plenty and the boxes of your signature sweets even more

if those two trust you, she has no reason not to

she smiles at you, holds out her hand for you to shake, and introduces herself as the doctor of the armed detective agency

your eyes widen and you smile back at her shaking her hand

“ah! you must be yosano-sensei then! ranpo-san and fukuzawa-san have talked about you! it’s so nice to meet you! im (l/n) (y/n)!”

“they’ve talked about you too, it’s a pleasure to finally meet you (y/n)”

after that exchange she insisted on bringing you home to treat you wounds which you told her it wasn’t necessary

she gave you a pointed look and that was when you realized what state you were in

you sighed and weakly gave in to which she only grinned at

before leaving the alley she walks over to the unconscious man and pulls out his wallet for some sort of identification and home address as you try to see if there’s any groceries still salvageable

after texting the details to kunikida, yosano turns to you poking around the now ruined grocery bags

she simply rubs your back and tells you that the both of you could go buy more groceries together as she was meaning to get some anyways; she even said she’ll pay for you

you refused obviously but she, unknowingly, used the same tactic fukuzawa used with you

“so you’re saying you don’t need groceries?”

“...”

*cue an eyebrow raise from our resident queen*

“...you agency members don’t like making things easy for me huh.”

you gave in reluctantly and at this point you don’t even know why you try negotiating with them

and that’s only three of them

apparently, she was on the other side of the street on the way to buy groceries for the agency when she noticed different produce items on the other sidewalk leading to the alley and she went to check out what happened

ironically, the way to the grocery store from the agency makes you go past Sakura’s but she didn’t realize it until after the two of you had met

before you know it, the two of you are in your apartment kitchen as she cleans and patches up all of your wounds

as she does so the two of you have a little girl talk

you find it quite comforting bc since you opened up Sakura’s you haven’t really had the chance to connect to many people much less other women

you definitely see yosano as your cool, loving, badass older sister

she thinks you’re adorable and agrees with ranpo’s opinion

yup 

that’s right

the opinion that you’re like a little kid </3

you called it a betrayal and all she did was laugh at you <//3

“awhh that’s really cool yosano-sensei!—MFPH?!?”

*squishing your cheeks the same way ranpo did* “ranpo-san was right (n/n)-chan, your cheeks are squishy!”

“?!”

after that small fiasco, the two of you talked some more and bonded over your love for flowers, japanese sweets, and much more!!

you even made a date to have a girls day to go shopping and eat out!

you’re internally squealing a bit bc it’s been a while since you’ve gone shopping

yosano notices and she giggles behind her hand not saying anything bc she knows you’ll only throw a fit

the two of you came around the topic of ranpo when lucky passed by

lucky quickly warmed up to the doctor and cozied up in her lap

“i wish ranpo-san was able to meet lucky when he came by the first time, but then again, he’d probably throw a tantrum if i don’t pay attention to him for 5 seconds”

she snorted at that and like fukuzawa, she shared stories abt the slightly older male

“ranpo-san doesn’t know how to ride a train?”

“unbelievable right?”

“for someone so intelligent i expected more from him”

“i’ll be telling that to ranpo-san, (n/n)-chan”

“wha—?! yosano-sensei please don’t!”

like ranpo, she’s also a tease </3

but you love her anyway <3

eventually, she finished patching you up and promised to treat you to a new set of clothes when the two of you go out

“you don’t need to lose a good set of clothes just because of a sleazy man (n/n)-chan! you deserve better!”

you were going to argue that the rips in your clothes were fairly small and could easily be fixed—except the tights—but you stopped in your tracks when you remembered that it was practically useless to argue against an ada member

the two of you walked to the grocery store and bought both of your needed supplies—along with some extra goodies—and then she walked you back to your place bc it was already a bit dark out

but even if it wasn’t, she would walk you anyways

besides, if anything happened to you, she’s 1000% positive that ranpo and fukuzawa are gonna flip the fuck out not that she wont cause she most definitely will

speaking of which

you were drinking a bottle of water as the two of made your way back to Sakura’s when all of a sudden

“(y/n) you do realize that i have to tell shachou and ranpo-san about what happened today right?”

you choked on your water

“yosano-sensei you can’t! if you do they’ll freak! they won’t leave me alone for at least two weeks! one if im lucky!”

“exactly the point”

you just accepted your defeat already knowing that you’d lose

but maybe you can simmer down their anger towards the bastard with sweets and lucky

you arrived at Sakura’s shortly after and after bringing groceries in, you packaged a bunch of pastries leftover from today—bc you closed early—and bc you’re well aware that ranpo doesn’t share any of the sweets you send him with

you even gave yosano her own special box filled with goodies she loves, and a thermos of fukuzawa’s favorite, your special hot honey lemon tea

other than the sweets, you prepared lucky to spend the night at fukuzawa’s

you really really hoped that doing these things would make them calm down

you shivered at the thought of what their responses would be

you felt really bad for giving yosano all these things to carry and that you were keeping her very late

she assured you that she was fine and that if someone tried to mess with her she’d kick their ass

and after exchanging numbers, the magenta eyed queen bid you a good night and walked back to the agency with lucky walking by her heels

arriving back at the agency, yosano was greeted with some concerns asking if she was alright bc she came back from her grocery run pretty late

(she usually goes in the mornings but today was pretty busy so she left in the late afternoon but now it was already dark)

she waved off the concerns and plopped a couple boxes of your signature bakery boxes at ranpo’s desk, the one for her at her own, the last few boxes in the kitchen for any other agent or clerk to grab, placed the thermos on the desk fukuzawa was by, and picked up lucky and handed him to the president

the two males were pleased with what yosano had brought them, and pleased that another agency member had the chance to meet you

fukuzawa was rubbing lucky and ranpo already snacking on treats as yosano expected

but here comes the hard part

or maybe it’s gonna amusing who knows

“i met (y/n) today.”

“we could tell.”

in goes another treat in the green eyed man’s mouth

“would you like to know how?”

“you bumped into each other, had girl talk, made plans to go out, went grocery shopping, and you brought me and shachou presents.”

“great job ranpo-san, you’re almost completely correct.”

this caught the attention of basically everyone bc they knew ranpo was never “almost completely correct”

“we ended up meeting bc she got attacked on her way home from grocery shopping, i treated her wounds, then we had girl talk and did all the other stuff”

ranpo and fukuzawa froze right in their tracks

“i sent all the info of the bastard to kunikida”

“kunikida.”

“yes shachou”

“find out everything about that man and bring it to me and ranpo”

“...yes shachou”

“and yosano”

“yes?”

“text (y/n) and tell her that her cat, tea, and pastries aren’t going to work as a bribe”

just as you finished taking a shower you sneezed

<<previous // next >>

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taglist: @hanniejji​ @timeless-tales46​ @realitycanbeajerk (i didn’t know if you wanted to be in the tag list or not but i tried anyway :)

italicized means it wouldn’t let me tag you 

[ugokuna]

shopping au pt.two

park ilypo, taek jegal, and commissioner/judge r x g/n reader

warnings: a little bit of spoilers for commissioner/judge r, esp if you didn’t watch the last episode and tiny bit of spoilers from the manhwa, if you’re okay with that then ignore this lol. fluff. angst (in r’s part). if i used improper pronouns for g/n then pls pls pls let me know!

a/n: this is part two. if ya’ll missed out on part one, it is here. i honestly did not know what the heck i just wrote, like it’s still shopping, but not really lol. i’m so sorry for half-assing ilypo’s part, his character was kinda hard to do??? for some reason??? ooc??? i also went off in r’s part, that’s why it’s the longest. it’s funny bc i personally don’t like him but um yea. anyways, i still hope you enjoy it!

park ilypo:

he actually calls you right when he finishes his ssam-su taekkyeon practice, knowing you’d probably be finished with your club bc, stay in school kids 

“hello?”

“hi.” you both sound breathless.

“sorry, did i call you at a bad time?” it makes you smile to hear his voice.

“no, i just got out of my club meeting. how was practice?”

“it went okay, could’ve done better. i called bc i was wondering if you would cook something for me at your place? i hope i’m not imposing.”

your smiling over on your side of the line. but he doesn’t know that. bc if there’s one thing you learned about your boyfriend, it’s that he hates being a burden. he rather take things into his own hands rather than have someone else do it.

“i can tell how excited you are,” he teases.

“i haven’t even said anything!”

before you even know it, you’re running along to the nearest store, backpack and uniform still on. but you don’t care. a chance like this was NOT going to be wasted.

you grab a shopping basket rather than a cart for your convenience.

you are the definition of lightning mcqueen at this point, you are speed, zooming thru the aisles as you try to come up with what you should have for ilypo.

you turn the corner and end up running into someone like a bulldozer.

“ah, sorry. are you okay?”

you freeze.

he freezes.

both of you just end up staring at each other like 👁👄👁

“w-what are you doing here?” you ask him, rubbing your forehead.

he laughs, his eyes turning into smiles. “i think i should be asking you that question.”

and that’s how you both end up shopping together. it’s mutual shopping, talking and pointing at which ingredient would be good. which ones would be best. which one would taste better. which one was cheaper.

as you add more and more things into the basket, you start to struggle to carry it. 

without evening offering, ilypo notices and smoothly takes it from you and carries on walking as if it were nothing.

for some reason your face is heating up at the small gesture. 

ilypo turns back to look at you. “what?” he says obliviously.

“what?” you mimic, dropping your voice an octave lower and scrunching up you face. you stomp your way to him, pouting as you wonder why your boyfriend could make you fall in love with him more. all you can do is rub the top of his head annoyingly. and you swear, even tho he’s a bit surprised, you can just see his nine tails wagging gleefully at your petting.

n e ways, after you both split the cost, the both of you end up just standing there awkwardly in front of the store bc you just bought all this food. and ilypo didn’t come by car, he ran as well. and the walk to your house is far. 👁👄👁

all you can do is sigh.

ilypo on the other hand just rolls up one of his pant leg. grabs the other half of the grocery bags from your grasp along with his. and runs off. “last one home has to cook the food!”

“ilypo! you idiot! i’m the one already cooking!” you run after him.

by the time you reach your house, you’re covered in a thick layer of sweat. you’re out of energy. grumpy. furious.

when you find ilypo in the living room, you are ready to beat him up. but you short circuit when you see him sprawled on the couch.

you make his way to him, falling on top of him.

he groans. opening one of his eyes. “took you long enough.”

“i hate you.”

“let’s get cooking.”

“no. i’m tired bc of you.”

ilypo pushes himself from under you, getting up and taking off his tiger sweater and putting it over you. “it’s ok. dinner’ll be ready by the time you wake up.”

taek jegal:

he told you that he’d be back, leaving you alone in his empty mansion during your study date. 

as you’re about to sigh, the front door slams open and you scream.

you see him come in with his body guards, their arms full of bags of groceries. his? empty, he doesn’t like getting his hands dirty. i don’t make the rules. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

“make me food, loser,” he tells you nonchalantly. as if it’s normal to barge into his own home with more than necessary bags of ingredients and demand you to make him “food.”

at this point in your relationship, you still hated how much he called you by that nickname. 

you peer into the bags. fruits. vegetables. snacks. meat. “this already is ‘food’ you loser. eat it as it is.”

“well aren’t you miss little smartass,” he teases, grinning down at you.

you both argue and have trouble on settling on which dish to cook. you prefer to make one big dish to share together while he opts for multiple dishes.

you argue that it’ll take too much time. that you’ve never even seen half of the ingredients he’s brought in. bc you speak broke.

he tells you that you have enough time since he has more than the typical four stoves. that he’ll help you cook with the ingredients you don’t know. bc he doesn’t speak broke.

in the end, you settle with a compromise of one of your favorite dish and two of his. in your opinion, you feel like it’s too much, but you don’t tell him that bc you’re pretty he caught on to it.

“nexttime,” you sigh, “at least tell me you’re going shopping.”

“why?”

you stare at him. “bc i want to actually take part in deciding what to buy. and bc i want to go shopping with you.” you murmur the last part, too shy and embarrassed to say something so cheesy out loud. 

you watch him get ready, pulling his aquamarine hair into a messy ponytail. this man is fineeee with his hair up, i don’t make the rules. like, the way his shirt rides up a bit at the waist, the way his arms flex under the matieral, sir have mercy on my- sorry i’m just going off at this point bc altho he may be the villian of g.o.h. he was a sexy one at that

he could choke you with his hair and you’ say thank you lolll

lemme eat you instead, you think to yourself

n e ways

surprisingly, this is your first time cooking at his place. and you’re so amazed at his culinary skills that you gawk at him like a fish out of the water. his mincing skills? on point. he even can cut an onion faster than it can make him tear up. you had expected him to be horrible at cooking with him being so rich, but you were so so so so wrong.

and he KNOWS that you know that he had you stumped. and he isn’t even trying to hide his big teasing smirk. you bonk him on the head.

ngl, you expected him to cut things up by summoning his megalodon. 

as you’re cutting something, rather fast too, you end up cutting yourself. nothing too deep, but enough to bleed. “ouch, i cut myself.” you go to the sink to rinse it off before grabbing a towel and putting it over the cut.

“lemme see,” taek jegal hums your way. he peels off the towel and examines it. he sighs. “just how clumsy are you, loser? bandages are on top of the cabinet over your head.”

“okay.” you turn away from your boyfriend to get a bandage when you feel something wet on your cut finger. you shriek as you look down. “w-what are you doing?!”

your boyfriend had licked your cut finger, blood along with it before sucking softly on the tip. “you were taking too long and the blood was getting everywhere.” he licks his lips.

as aggressive and merciless as taek jegal can get with his enemies, he was surprising careful when putting the bandage on you. you wonder why he didn’t show this side to others more. even tho you’ve been dating him since the start of high school, you realized that you barely knew what was going on inside his head.

“you’ve gone quiet. what is it?” his voice is surprising soft too, nothing like the usual gruff tone.

“it’s nothing.” you shake your head. maybe another time you’d bring it up.

“you’re such a bad liar,” he tells you, raising a sharp thin eyebrow.

“shut up, you loser.”

he erupts into a laugh before bringing you hand up to his lips, kissing the tip of your finger. “i’m your loser.”

commissioner r:

just like taek jegal, he goes shopping on his own. not bc he wants to, no, rather, bc he needs to.

about a month ago, you and r had a very heated argument to the point where he even was about to use his borrowed power on you, a non-power borrower.

“are you sure you want to go through with your plan?” you ask him, sitting across from him in the living room couch. it was late at night when finally he told you of his plans of going against park mubong and work with nox. you had your suspicions, but what he just told you confirmed it.

he only looks at you, which ticks you off.

“what if it doesn’t go the way you want it to? do you have a solid plan if it goes south?” with him staying in his quiet and calm demeanor, it only makes you more worried. r was the type to bottle and keep everything inside.

“i know what i’m doing,” is all he offers you.

you clench your fist into his shirt that you were wearing. “ok, i believe you. i’m just worried about the worst case scenario. i know how serious you are about this, and i trust you but-”

r looks at you though the slit of his eyes. “if you trust me, then there’s no need for you to worry.”

you frown. “i think i do. bc what if you die, i can’t help but jump to that conclusion. it’s like you don’t even care if you do.”

“i won’t,” he growls out, his patience beginning to crumble. “i can’t explain it to you right now, but i will when i set things my way.”

you turn your head away from him. “isn’t that what you always say?”

“then...then what do you want me to say?! that i won’t die?! i won’t! i’m not like you lowlife humans who all deserve to die!”

you whip your head his way, scowling at his cruel words. “then you must want me to die as well then. that’s what you want right? if you’re so bound on hating humans, then there really was no point in dating me right? It’s better to just kill me right? i could have have told park mubong of my suspicions but i didn’t! i trusted whatever you were planning! why can’t you see that i genuinely care about you bc i love you?”

“that’s what they all say, but i know better than to trust a human’s words. let alone yours bc in the end, anyone can betray anyone.”

you rise from your seat. “fine, let’s break up. that’s what you want, right?”

“shit,” he curses to himself, banging his fist onto the shelf of the store aisle, breaking it and making the items fall onto the floor. he hated his mind kept pulling that memory out of him.

“um...s-sir.”

he looks up to see an employee staring at him. “what?”

“excuse, but, if you keep causing such a mess, you’re going to get kicked out. this isn’t the first time.”

all r can do is set his lip straight and move onto another aisle. 

here he was at the store, trying to shop for the ingredients for the dish you used to make him after a long day at work. but now that it’s been a month since you moved out of your shared apartment, he was craving it more than ever. but dammit, he couldn’t quite recall what ingredients you used. he should’ve paid more attention to it. to you.

“do you think my daddy will like this, (y/n)?”

r looks up from his dress shoes at the sound of your voice. 

there you were, at the other end of the aisle with a little boy.

he watches as you smile brightly at the boy, nodding before saying, “he’ll absolutely love it.”

the boy shouts a hooray before turning his way to put the gift into the cart. “look, auntie (y/n)! it’s r!” the boy runs up to the commissioner.

you look up.

and you both lock eyes.

r notices how fast your eyes turn dull. he stays quiet. like always. before sending a small quick wave to the little boy.

“hello,” you greet him formally when you reach him.

he nods your way.

“hi, r! do you remember me? i’m naoko, it’s been a long time since we saw each other right?”

you intervene. “i’m so sorry, sometimes he can get carried away in a conversation.”

“i remember,” he tells you.

“r, r, r,” naoko nags excitedly, “i’m almost ten, can’t you believe that?”

he looks at you from the slit of his eye before looking at the boy. “i heard you were seven.”

“i’m almost ten.”

you whisper to naoko to put the item into the cart before looking back to your ex. “i’m sorry about that. we’re shopping for his father, my brother, who you met before, right?”

he only remains silent.

you bite your lip, what did i expect? “anyways, what are you doing here?”

his eyes open at your question, not sure if he should tell the truth or lie. “to...buy... q some food since he’s broke.” somewhere, q sneezes.

“no you’re not,” naoko skips back into the conversation. “i recognize those ingredients anywhere. those are what (y/n) makes when i want to eat that dish.”

“oh, are you trying to make that dish?” you ask him.

and so that’s how it ended up with you and naoko shopping for r. technically, it’s naoko shopping for r since he remembers all the ingredients while the both of you stayed behind to watch him enjoy himself.

you both watched as naoko happily walked through the aisles, collecting the correct items --and sometimes carrying too many in his small arms-- and putting it into r’s basket.

the silence was too thick. the curiosity to how things have been since the breakup is heavy. the yearning to just ask is burdensome between the two of you.

“how’s it going?” you ask him cautiously, not looking at him. “with, you know, nox.”

he looks at you, wanting you to look at him. there’s silence. and you don’t expect him to answer you at all. you just wanted to put it out there. “it’s going smoothly.”

hopefully it remains that way, you think. “that... that must be good.”

usually it’s you who would always keep the conversation going, but now that you weren’t dating, there was no point in putting in the effort. not anymore.

r insists on paying for both of his and your things, and no matter how hard you try to refuse, he ends up doing it against your wish.

to say the least, it was embarrassing, especially when the cashier assumed that naoko was your shared kid and called him cute and all the boys did was smite brightly and the other remained silent.

before you part ways, r speaks up. “will you come over and show me how to make it?”

and so here you were, in r’s apartment --the same one you used to live in-- after you dropped naoko off. you note that r had rearranged everything in the apartment.

you help him unpack, prep, and show him step-by-step how to make the dish.

he watches how you do everything and commits it to memory. he watches you closely, committing you to memory. bc he wasn't sure if this was the last time he’d see you again.

and when he begins to feel that the dish is almost done cooking, like when you just know when a movie is almost to its end, he blurts it out. “stay.”

you look at him from over the fallen strands of hair your hair tie didn’t catch. it’s your turn to stay silent.

“stay,” he repeats to you, much softer than the first that it almost gets drowned out by all the noise being produced in the kitchen. his gaze is steady and strong and unrelenting. just like you remember. you can see how serious he is.

and you wonder, does he mean to stay for dinner? or stay forever?

all you can offer him is a sad smile and the shake of your head. 

[jung-snoopy-woo]

How I Met Your Grandfather

~ Chapter 4 ~

(gif credit: @ katelin via Pinterest)

Pairing: Bang Chan × reader, twin brother! Felix.

Other Chapters: Masterlist | 1 | 2 | 3 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 (coming soon!!).

Genre: fluff, a bit of angst.

Warnings: None :)

Word Count: 1.6k+.

Summary: Felix and his sisters go to the movies together after a long time. Felix is surprised to see Chan there too and they have a talk. When Felix and the girls get home, he decides to tell her about the situation.

A/N: Decided to upload it today bc I might not have time in the next few days (I’m so stressed and busy vndsfjkvdvnk)

Also, I think this chapter was the hardest for me to write so I’m sorry it’s not the best 😢😢 but hopefully you can still enjoy it!! 

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"Y/N!!!", Rachael, your older sister, called from downstairs. "We're only going to the movie theater, what's taking you so long??"

It's not that you were slow or anything like that, it's just that it's been a while since you last went out with all of them and you were so excited, as a huge Marvel fan who finally gets to watch the new movie with her siblings who are also her best friends in the world, that it might've taken you a while to choose what to wear and how to look presentable.

As you walked down the stairs, Olivia and Rachael complimented the way you looked and Felix gave you a little smile. You two started talking again (of course, as you two are like the best siblings... Also, you got mad about something that wasn't even his fault), and you seemed pretty fine after that day (when you stormed outside for a reason Felix haven't figured out yet, but as you already moved on- he just thought it was better not to ask. I mean, all siblings have small fights they don't even know what they're about, right?).

He missed hanging out with his sisters so much, and it's been a while since he had some break from practicing or performing, being busy all the time. He always felt sorry for not even telling them that he was okay, as he always fell asleep before he could even think of doing so. He was exhausted, but he loved what he was doing.

Rachael was driving and she let you choose the music to play in the car. You decided to play some Stray Kids songs (such a supportive cute family awww) so you all jammed to them on your way to the movies.

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"Shhhhh~!!", you told Olivia who was sitting to your right as she was moving uncomfortably, "it's about to start!"

"But uhmm.. I... I really have to go to the bathroom.. please, Y/N, come with me", she said, begging. You couldn't get angry at her because you remembered how you did just the same to Rachael not too long ago. And you know, no one wants to go to the public toilets alone.

When you got back, the lights were already off but you could see from afar that there was someone now sitting on the seat to your left, which was empty just before you and Olivia left. You said "excuse me", as you made your way to your seat, trying your best not to step on anyone's feet (Olivia was a lot better than you at that). "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!", you told the guy sitting there. Of course, if you succeeded going all this way without stepping on (almost) anyone, it had to happen just when you were one seat away from yours. And thank God you balanced yourself back, a second before almost tripping and falling over him. 'Ugh, this is probably going to be so awkward now', you thought. 'I'm just going to avoid looking at him the whole movie so I don't have to deal with his judgemental look. "Oh, it's okay", a somehow familiar voice said. 'Don't look', you told yourself. 'It's not him, stop thinking and just enjoy the movie.'

'Why isn't she looking at me?', Chan thought. When you almost lost your balance as you stepped on his foot, he was ready to catch you if you fell, movie style, somewhat disappointed you didn't. He thought you'd turn to him once you heard his voice, but he was faced with disappointment, yet again. Maybe you didn't recognize his voice? Or maybe you knew it was him and just didn't care?

But he had so much fun watching you as you got excited when your favorite character appeared or the way you got mad at the evil ones. He enjoyed the moments you'd be the only one laughing in the whole theater, the most. Just listening to your laugh made him feel ×100 times better. He even stopped making up scenarios in his head as to why you didn't turn to him at the beginning of the movie. He thought of how you'd laugh at his stupid jokes, when him and the boys visited, and smile to himself.

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"Chris hyung??", Chan heard from behind him, on his way to the male's restrooms during the Intermission (a/n: I don't know if movies still have them out of my city but yeah we have those halfway through the movie lol). Felix could recognize the older boy's back everywhere. 'Oh, no', Chan thought. 'Why does it have to be Felix? Ughhh and why did I get myself into this mess? I didn't even get to say a word to her...Should I walk faster or...', he stopped. 'NO Chris, you have to face it like an adult'. He turned and gave Felix the most I'm-innocent-and-didn't-ask-your-younger-sister to-buy-me-a-ticket-so-I-could-see-your-twin-sister smile he could pull, saying "Heyyy Felix, how's it going?"

"I'm pretty good, just got out of the new Marvel movie... You?", Felix asked. He wasn't stupid, of course. When Y/N and Olivia left to go to the bathroom, in the beginning of the movie, he could see someone that resembled his friend way too much, sitting on the left to Y/N's seat, but he let this thought go, thinking it was just his imagination ('Thinking of the members during the holiday? Come on, I have to just relax'). But now, seeing him standing in front of him, there's no doubt it really was him. And to be honest, Felix wasn't very happy to see him here. The chances of Chan sitting so close to them in such a big movie theater were... Well, very small.

"Oh, I was just...", Chan started. The look on Felix's face made it pretty obvious that he saw him there, and that he was pretty mad too. There's no point in lying here. He sighed. "Listen, Lix, I'm sorr--"

"How?", Felix asked, as Chan lifted his eyes to look at his, confused. "How did you get that seat?", He asked, now being a bit less angry and more curious.

"I... I asked Olivia to buy a ticket for me when I saw her after grocery shopping", He admitted. He couldn't be any more embarrassed than he was at that moment. "I gave her the money!", He added. Chan couldn't read Felix's face. Was he mad? Disappointed? Did he want to punch him in the face? All of the above? But then, Felix started laughing. "Oh my god.. Chris hyung... you went that far...", He said between giggles. "For Y/N? So you could see her?"

"Felix, listen I...", He started, a bit confused and taken aback from Felix's reaction, but feeling more sorry than he could describe in words. "I know I promised to be okay with your decision, but I--"

"No, no, Chris, bro, stop", Felix said as his laughter stopped. And so did Chan's heartbeat, almost. "You know what? I'll be honest with you, I am pretty angry seeing you here...", He started. Chan wanted to apologise, again, but Felix continued before he could say anything. "BUT it also made me realize how much you really like Y/N and that you're willing to do some very weird stuff just to see her... So I think... uhhmm.. I think I'll maybe give you two a chance".

Chan couldn't express the happiness he felt at that moment. Oh my god, these were the words he wanted to hear the most (Okay, maybe they were in like 2nd place?). "Felix, bro, thank you", was all he could say.

"But I want you to know that if you hurt her in any way, I'll break you. Somehow. Because you're like super fit and strong and--", he was stopped by Chan's hug. "I promise I'll never do anything to hurt Y/N", he said with the biggest smile, almost choking the younger as he hugged him even closer. Finally, he got the chance he wanted. And he's not going to ruin it.

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You were NOT okay.

You told yourself for the 5th time today that it was normal. It's just a crush who didn't like you back (again), and not a heartbreak. And you tried telling yourself that a guy (that you only met once, by the way) is not worth being sad over.

In the past month you already finished reading 7 books, tried 20 workout routines you added to 'Watch Later' and never had the time or energy to get back to, learned baking 10 new types of cakes and cookies, did some drawings and paintings, and you even played a few video games with Felix (you now understood why he spent so much time doing that, because woah you were one competitive girl and as so, tried so hard winning, "Like, come on, I have to at least win ONCE", to which Felix replied with "I can lose on purpose if you--", "NO WAY").

But now, after coming back from the movies, you finally realized something was wrong. You did enjoy the movie, though. You laughed and you cried and you showed love towards some characters and hate towards others. It's just that you noticed how your heart started beating so fast when you heard that voice in the movies, saying "it's okay". This voice... Sounded so much like him. And it made you feel weird the whole movie. You kind of regretted not looking, and for letting your feeling of awkwardness take over. But what could you do? You didn't want to embarrass yourself by looking in the eye of the poor guy you stepped on.

"Y/N?", You heard Felix say from behind you. You turned, and saw his troubled eyes. "Can we talk?", He asked. You didn't know what it's going to be about, but whatever it is- it seemed to be very important.

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Hope you enjoyed!! (Pleaseee let me know what do you think)  💕💕

[surveys4ever]

36.

Name a song that brings back memories of your childhood when you hear it. Little Bitty by Alan Jackson.

When was the last time you ate strawberries? We had waffles for dinner on father’s day because Beebs loves breakfast and I always make them with strawberries and whipped cream.

Is there anything you like to put on a sandwich, that some might find odd? Sometimes I put chips or crackers on my sandwiches. And I always used to get banana peppers on my subs at Subway.

What colour are the shoes you wear most often? White or brown.

When was the last time you were required to put on a mask? We haven’t been required to wear one in a while now but we still do when we go in public.

And what colour was the last mask you wore? Leopard print!

Can you recall the last time you gave your mobile phone number to someone? I mentioned in a previous note that I just met a new friend and I gave her my number because I’m a lot more likely to respond to texts than DMs.

The last time you were in a queue, what were you waiting for? Foood.

Have you had your Covid vaccine yet? Which one, if you have? Not yet!

If you've had your vaccine, did you experience any side effects? --

Can you recall the last time you walked up or down a hill? I can’t tbh.

Any idea what you were doing at 5:30PM last Saturday? Oh lord I don’t remember. Probably hanging out on the couch.

The last time you went to a supermarket what were some of the items you bought? We just got home from grocery shopping and we got our weekly stuff. Vegetarian meats, croissants, various cheeses, pastas, a pizza for dinner tonight bc as if I’m actually cooking dinner after all that, soda, assorted veggies, etc.

When you were 13 years old, who was your closest friend? Do you still talk? Her name is Alisha and sadly not really. We really grew apart and don’t have anything in common anymore. I still text her to wish her a happy birthday and check in once in a while but they’re never very deep conversations.

Have you ever met anyone named Janine? Nope!

When was the last time you had a bottle of pop, or soda? What kind? Ummm..I had a coke slushie yesterday if that counts!

What was the last catchy song you heard? Did you sing along to it? I Wanna Be Your Slave by Måneskin and of course!

Can any of your friends sing well? Which one has the nicest singing voice? I don’t think so tbh but our neighbor’s daughter actually has thee most beautiful singing voice. She hangs out outside and sings sometimes and I always love when I catch it because she’s so good.

When was the last time you wore make-up, if ever? What shades/colours? Last time I wore makeup was Wednesday I think. I really just did my brows, my regular face of foundation/concealer/bronzer/blush/highlighter, threw some bronzer in my crease, popped on a pair of lashes, and put on a glossy nude lip tint to finish it off.

Do you have any accessories that you wear daily?  My wedding rings and my glasses!

What brand of lip balm do you prefer? I like the thick, oily ones that last forever.

What was the last thing you wrote down on paper? I wrote in my day planner earlier.

And what colour was the pen you wrote with? Pink!

When was the last time you had a parcel delivered? Ummm..Thursday or Friday. It was a PR package.

If you wear nail varnish, do you have a favourite brand/shade? I usually wear Essie or OPI! And I wear a lot of different colors, so.

What's the next item of clothing that you intend to buy for yourself? I’m not sure! I need some more capris.

What is something that seems popular, but doesn't interest you personally? K-pop.

How old is the device you're currently using to access Tumblr? I bought it at the end of 2019!

[chickenisamazing]

Was gonna eat a second meal today and just never went downstairs. Didn't go grocery shopping either bc it was rainy and I didn't feel like getting up. Haven't re-started my meds either even though I'm supposed to get blood work done next month. And I still haven't finished my personal statements or emailed my professors. I am a hot, steaming pile of garbage pouring out of an overturned trash can.

I need 2 fix this!!

[damn-it-damian]

Why don't you hit me instead of screaming at each other?

and a little something I call "the sponge effect"

[long post ahead]

My parents have never beaten me up. Like yeah, my father spanked me like twice when I was like five years old - first bc I forgot to do my housework and second bc I was rude to my mum. And hell, I made so damn sure to never do that again. But that was all. Aside from that, none of them ever hit me. Not even a slap across the face. But oh, did they scream! The worst of all? Most of the time, they're not even screaming at me! Most of the time, they are just screaming at each other bc of some absolutely stupid thing. Or, one of them is screaming bc of the other one, but the other one is not even there! Like, my mother was screaming and went hysterical for nearly 30 minutes the other morning because my father have thrown away her water bottle when he was cleaning the kitchen the day before and now, she have to go and buy another. And of course it works the other way, too. Father screaming bc of something my mother did. Best of all? They start screaming at each other when the whole family (him, her, me and my 16-year-old sister) is having dinner bc of something that happened yesterday morning but they haven't seen each other until now. And me and sis- we are just sitting there bc we are not allowed to leave until we finish our meals and we are not allowed to take it to our rooms or to throw it away. And I'm just silently clenching my fists under the table so they won't see and slowly but surely I'm about to cry.

And suddenly, they're all like, why the hell are you crying? Stop it. Nobody is hurting you!

But you do.

You are hurting me so much, you just don't realize it. This screaming of yours, it's hurting me so much! I know that probably none of you is doing this to me intentionally, that none of you is hurting me knowingly and that you're just venting out your anger, but if you just want to take your anger out on someone and make yourself feel better - here I am. Just hit me, but please! Stop screaming. I know that you're not hitting me bc you don't want to hurt me - I am your child after all - but you just don't realize that you're hurting me so much more when you do this. Why don't you just slap me across the face instead of all this screaming? It would be just so much better! It would hurt, yes, but it would be just so much better that all of this.

Like, I can deal with physical pain. It's so much better that the psychical and mental pain. Yes, all those bruises hurts like hell but it all fades away eventually. Psychical pain does not. It may get weaker, yes, but it's still there. And it still hurts. All those insults and that screaming - it's all still there.

That's mostly why I'm skipping dinners now bc there's always a possibility that something like this will happen.

So, the actual story is: today I've woken up to my mother screaming. Like, a lot more than usual. She went completely hysteric. I mean, she was in the kitchen which is on the ground floor, I was in my freaking attic room on the freaking third floor and it still managed to wake me up from my deep-ass sleep. At first, I thought that I can manage to just ignore it. Clasp my hands on my ears, burry my head under the pillow and just ignore it. It's the best thing you can do, when she's like this. I mean, every time I hear people scream my body just stops working. It's in some kind of paralysis when I have a need to curl on myself, close my eyes and clasp my ears until it ends. But man, just how much I've been wrong. There was like no way I could survive with ignoring it like that because it just didn't end. I had no idea what's going on or why she's so mad, but I thought that maybe if I go downstairs and ask her what's happening them maybe I could help somehow and end all of this. (like, I know that it actually doesn't work bc I've tried so many times and it never helps, but I just needed it to stop!)

So, I got up from the bed, I went downstairs and casually, in the soft voice and without any screaming or shouting I asked her what's wrong. And man, I've never been screamed at as much as this in my whole life. I seriously though I'll start crying. I mean, not because I was screamed at, but the feeling of that moment was just so wrong! And I still couldn't make out what's wrong, I had no idea what's happening. It all just felt so wrong.

Like, let's say that I'm quite empathetic and a way more 'softer' and more 'sensitive' than other boys (at least more than all the boys I've met till now) and I just can 'feel' the emotions of other people (gosh, that sounds weird). I mean, it affects me like, a lot. Casually, I'm referring to it as 'the sponge effect'.

That's something I made up myself so please don't judge me but people seem to understand it more if I have some name with which I can call it. And basically, it works like a big sponge. I'm here and like a sponge is absorbing water, I'm absorbing emotions of other people. Like, when I'm around someone who is sad or crying - even if it's a complete stranger, someone I've never seen before in my life - I just feel like crying and if it's really intensive I'll most likely start crying, too. It works like this with all kinds of emotions but sadly, it's a lot stronger with the negative ones. At least in my case.

So these emotional outburst are... let's say it's really difficult for me.

And like a big sponge, I still continue to absorb all emotions from people around me and people I meet. And I just keep them inside unit there's no room and I'm completely overwhelmed. And then, when the sponge is full you have to squeeze it to wring it out so it can absorb new water again. The only problem is that I can't let those emotions go. I mean, of course I can let my emotions go, but that applies only on the 'good ones'. But I just can't take my anger and negative emotions out on others. I mean, that's what people do - someone is mean at them and 'gives' them that emotion and they 'pass' it to the next person by being mean to him. Like yeah, I'm angry as hell, I wanna scream, I wanna shout, I wanna swear, I wanna punch something till it breaks but I just can't. For some reason. Or I just really don't want to, I don't know. I mean, it's probably a good thing bc I'm not 'passing' those negative emotions on other people but I can't keep them in either bc honestly, it's killing me. Like, all that rage and anger and hatred is still in there and it's pilling up. And I still keep it in bc I just can't let it out to hurt other people, unit it becomes something I can deal with: sorrow. Just keep it in long enough till all that hate and anger fades to sadness and sorrow. Now, that's something you can work with, isn't it? Sure, you can! (please don't.) But yeah, basically I can deal with sadness a little bit better than with anger and I can actually let it out. So yeah, I'm crying myself to sleep and I'm full of self-hate. But that's okay, right? You can cry in secret so nobody can see you and your negative emotions won't affect others. (It feels so bad, please don't do this qwq). But it works. And then I just cry it out. All of it, all of those emotions. Till I'm an empty dry sponge again. And it all feels so cold and wrong. And I feel empty and alone and I'm just so touch starved. I just so miss that most basic kind affection like patting on the back when I cry or hugging when I feel so empty after all of that.

But hey, here I am - ready to suck up some new negative emotions.

You still here for the actual story? Great! (I literally love you if you made it to this point! qwq)

So, after I went downstairs and gently asked my mother what's wrong, she screamed her head out on me. But I wasn't able to make out what's actually going on. And I just felt so bad because I actually care but she didn't even give me a chance to help. But okay she doesn't want to speak to me? That's cool, I won't push.

I just... need to... get out of here.

So I just ran out of our house without thinking. Just grabbed my jacket, pulled on some shoes a ran out like that. Like, the whole freaking street of people saw my undies bc aside from the jacket I was wearing only my sleeping t-shirt. But I absolutely didn't care at that moment. I just wanted to get away from all that screaming.

I mean, I'm not a rebellious type of child but today I've seriously considered running away. Not to upset my parents or to make them miss me, no, I just want to get away from all of that. I didn't run away tho. I just sat outside on the street and when I saw them leaving for groceries I quickly ran back, changed into some normal clothes, took something to eat for later and then I ran to my uncle's house where I "hid" in the cellar - all before they returned from the grocery shop so they couldn't see me.

Well theoretically, I'm still in our house, bc our and uncle's house share the same wall, but here I feel a way more safer rn. I mean, the cellar is basically underground, main unit of central heating is based here so it's warm in here (not like on the street rn) and it's relatively quiet in here. Like yeah, I still can hear some of my parents' screaming (bc of that one shared wall) but it's a way less than when I'm in my room and I can put my headphones on in here which I can't do at home bc my parents assume that I'm purposely ignoring them when instead I'm just trying to block out all that shouting. Plus, nobody knows I'm here! (yeah, my uncle knows but he won't tell)

.

What I was about to say is, that today I finally told myself that I've had enough and that after I finish school (I have finals in less than one month from now) I'll visit a psychologist bc I really need to talk about this. Mostly bc I wasn't really allowed to visit her until now, because only mentally ill people visit psychologist and you aren't ill, now are you? But you know what? Fuck you all!

Also, I probably can't move out yet, even if I wanted to (and the hell I want!) bc I don't have enough money but I told myself that I'll make damn sure to live away from home when I start college. And when I'm at it I also need to come out from the closet and find myself someone who'll help me out of my touch starved misery.

[scrambledthoughtz]

what i could do better on

1) i could be spending my time better. i feel like, as of late, i’ve been wasting more and more of the time that makes up each of my days. i get distracted so easily. i come home from school or work, and i spend hours and hours on youtube, watching random shit. four out of my five school days, i don’t get home until 5 pm or a little after, and you’d think that this limited amount of time would spur me into productivity. that’s what i thought too, but usually when i get back, i end up laying on my bed and draining my energy even more by spending hours on youtube or facebook. i feel like i’m significantly less motivated than i was last semester, and i’m not sure if this is a sign of burnout, if i’m depressed (lol probably not?), or if my study habits are just spiraling and i’m becoming more lazy. i have this mindset where it’s okay if i don’t start my work until later bc i don’t need to sleep. as long as i get it done before 11:59. as long as i get it done before the deadline, even if that means finishing it in the morning. yesterday, i had a whole collection of assignments due at 11:59 and i actually waited until 11 pm to start one of them. earlier this week, i submitted my essay at 11:57 and i spent until 11:50 typing up the conclusion. it’s crazy, bc “past” me would have finished my essay early to make time for revisions or proofreading. this time, i didn’t even care; i was typing up my conclusion for the first time 10 minutes before the essay was due. it’s weird to think about this comparison, but in my first semester, i literally went to mission coffee after my class ended, and i took out a sticky note and i wrote down EXACTLY how much time i would spend on each assignment to make sure that i was sufficiently alternating between getting things done. i would carve out an hour to type up my english 101c reflection responses, and then i would take a 15 minute break to go on my phone, and then i would start another subject and then i would alternate and it was so freaking efficient. nowadays, i just trust that i will get it done, even if it means putting minimal effort into my work. as long as it’s submitted. 

2) going off of that, i could control my impulses better. what do i mean by that? it’s honestly pretty difficult to put into words. this is something i’ve actually never spoken about, which is weird bc most facets of my life i’ve attempted to put into words and talk about at least once. anyways, what i mean by impulses is that i’ve been more frequently getting the urge to watch videos that make me feel a certain type of way. it’s not quite like porn, but these videos are more intimate and raw, and usually when i’m watching them, they evoke a deep aching within me that spreads like a crackling electricity that numbs me in the best way possible. i usually do this before i go to sleep or right after i wake up bc it’s such a pleasant sensation, but as of late, i’ve been more frequently waking up in the middle of the night (i think it’s bc i usually forget to turn the lights off before i go to sleep, or it’s bc i decided to take a nap instead of studying and the anxiety wakes me up or bc i spend an obscene amount of time staring at a bright screen before i go to sleep). but i’ve started watching these videos when i wake up in the middle of the night too, and it’s honestly something that has been taking up so much of my time. i get these urges and they’re hard to resist, so i lay down on my bed and get into the zone and hours can pass by without me caring. i recognize that this is starting to sound erotic lmfao but it’s the best way that i can put it for now. i’m sure i’ll get better at putting this into words later. 

i do wonder though: am i getting these urges bc i’m craving physical touch? this is something that’s been on my mind a lot lately. i haven’t really had solid physical touch for a while. the most physical contact i get and receive is an awkward hug or an occasional handshake. i keep telling myself that the last real time was with mom bc she would hug and hold me when i was upset, or she’d gently brush my hair back. honestly, this is probably the main reason i would be okay with having a romantic partner. it’s not bc of pressure from friends or family, but it’s to have that level of physical intimacy.

3) lastly (for now). stop with the self-pity. you need to get yourself together. i got a C on my geography midterm this past week, and the first thing that came to my mind was, “it’s okay, you’re probably going through something bc normally, you wouldn’t get such a bad grade on an exam.” i need to stop thinking like that. when i come home and spend hours on youtube, i tell myself that it might be bc i’m subconsciously going through something. but that might not even be true, and even if it is, it doesn’t make this excusable. i feel bad for myself way too often, and even worse, i expect others to feel the same level of understanding or pity. if only they knew about mom, they would let me off easy. this fact about me has become this type of secret weapon that i’ve told myself that i can wield at any time. but in reality, that doesn’t make it okay for me to fuck around instead of spending time on my classes, and it doesn’t make it okay for me to be getting lower grades on my exams and assignments just bc i procrastinated.

you can’t expect everyone to have sympathy. even if they did know about mom, they might not give a shit. other ppl have gone through worse, but they’re still doing well at school. you’re super privileged, and this one sad fact about you doesn’t change that. at least you get to come home from school every day to food on the table, and you can still ask your dad to pay you back for groceries and gas. you have a job, but you don’t actually need it bc your dad is supporting you with his income. you need to get out of your bubble. you expected your dad to pay for your car accident, and you were shocked when he said, “you were the one who got into the accident, don’t you think you should pay for it?” and he’s right, you know? you can’t be recklessly spending money every time you get stressed. that’s just another part of your self-pity cycle. you tell yourself that it’s okay to spend $2 on a granola bar at the vending machine bc you forgot to pack a snack and you were stressed about the fact that you failed your geography midterm. you expect your dad to pay you back for your purchases, when in reality, you should be taking responsibility and keeping a budget and making sure that you don’t eat out too much with friends or spend too much on coffee every time you can’t focus at home and go out to a coffee shop to study. 

you’re being irresponsible, lazy, and your self-pitying is getting out of control. get yourself together.

you know, even as i’m typing this, it’s not hitting me for real. these are just words that are my thoughts, but i’m not actually internalizing them. it’ll probably hit for real when i transfer and move away, but i honestly want to get a grip of these things before then. 

[bouttogolinkurbitch]

hey just a little request from ya girl bc ya said ya in the mood to write, but anywho literally write anything about E and I bc I could use some E imagines rn ahhhh

Mutual: Ethan Dolan for @dolanoodle

sorry for errors

Also, I still wrote it as Y/N ;))___

All night Ethan and I had been avoiding speaking. Three weeks ago we had slept together when Grayson was out with some friends. I felt so awful after, not because it was bad, but because Ethan had been looking to be in a relationship. It’s safe to say that didn’t work out after she found out we had boned.

I was sat on the couch in the living room on my phone when I heard a loud bang down the hall. “Fuck!” Ethan yelled out, I ignored it, figuring it wasn’t my place. Grayson was out again, grocery shopping I believe, which left us alone. I looked to the hall as I heard Ethan come in. “Listen, I know we aren’t speaking, but could you help me wrap my hand?” He asked. I looked at his limp left hand and I nodded.“Come here, you goof.” I muttered as he followed me to the bathroom.

I had him sit on the closed toilet before I got the ace wrap and started to firmly wrap his wrist and hand. “Why haven’t you looked at me, Y/N?” I bit my lip slightly as I finished up before I turned. “I just am processing shit.” He was quiet before he stood, “I need to know if you’ll love me before I fall too deep. Help me understand what you’re feeling.” Our eyes locked in the mirror and his good hand landed around my waist. My eyes drifted to his hand and then back to his eyes. “What do you want from me? How do I show you?” I asked, he laid his chin against my shoulder. “I need to know if this is mutual. I need to know if you’ll reciprocate.” My eyes squeezed shut as I pictured a future with Ethan.

A future where we could potentially get married or have our own little babies. When they finally opened, his eyes were hooded as he watched me. “Ethan, I can’t do this right now. I hope your hand is okay.” I mumbled before I moved from his arms, and I went to collect my hoodie, phone, and keys. He came out of the bathroom and watched before I went to the front door. “Before you go,” He said softly, and I turned, “What are you afraid of?” I let that sink in before I looked back up at him, “I’m afraid I’ve already fallen.”

I laid in bed with a cold chill over my body. Ethan was the only thing on my mind so I chose to change that. Instead, I wanted him in my arms or between my legs. I got my keys and phone before I went out to my car and practically sped to his house. I walked around the back, past the pool, to the door that led from the patio to his room. I knocked against the glass and waited. In a few seconds, the glass slid open and he stood there, arms crossed. “I love you, Ethan Grant Dolan. Fuck you for making me feel this way.” I growled before I pulled him down to my height and kissed him. His hands slid around my body as he pulled my inside, his lips moved against mine until we stood still. “I love you too, princess.”

[softhaos]

NEIGHBOUR!AU SEUNGKWAN

masterlist other members: s.coups | jeonghan | joshua | jun | hoshi | wonwoo | woozi | dk | mingyu | the8 | vernon | dino

you’re so grateful for having seungkwan as your neighbour

,,,,, most of the time that is,,,,,,

there are times where he just can’t mind his business and highkey wants to know everything about your day and all that jazz

and sometimes you end up being very very very bothered and annoyed by him,,,,,, ofc you know he only means well but s t i l l

though whenever you have a bad day and don’t need to spell it out, he’ll try his best to cheer you up

you sorta consider him a close friend but at the same time you’re trying to keep a distance to him bc the only reason why you came into contact with him is that you’re neighbours

doesn’t matter fact is he’s the one you trust the most in the entire apartment complex

up to the point where he has your spare key in case you lock yourself out

and vice versa you have his spare key

luckily seungkwan has never abused the power of having your spare key and never barged into your place and you also did the same

he tends to throw some things on your balcony tho for some reason

you have your daily routine and so does he

and you coincidentally leave your place at the same time so you always chat a little until you part ways at the subway

seungkwan has two moods in the morning and is always the one who initiates the conversation,,,, it’s either

“good morning y/n i hope you have a nice day pls do nOT die or get involved in an accident!!!”

or

“y/n i feel the need to die or get involved in an accident”

and you’d either reply with

“seungkwan i won’t don’t worry”

or

“DO NOT GET RUN OVER BY A BULLDOZER AND DIE BOO SEUNGKWAN ISTG”

you’re so close to each other that he invites you over every other day or you invite him and watch some movies together and do stuff friends do

tbh the longest time ýou haven’t seen each other is three days

whenever you don’t see each other for a longer period of time one of you will text the other and ask for life updates,,, because yes you care THAT much

this also applies whenever one of you is on holiday,,,,,,, life updates are vital ok

your workload is getting bigger and bigger and you decide to work from home for the rest of the week

meaning that you won’t leave your place for the next seven days

dw you went on a huge grocery shopping spree the week before because you know you’ll need all the proteins and carbonates you can get

ofc seungkwan notices,,,,, and he’s getting restless

whenever he knocks on your door you’re either asleep

or busy

or done with life

therefore you don’t open the door

and whatever text messages he sends to you

well,,,, you blocked him just for the short duration bc he’s gonna squeeze out all of the information and you just cannot be bothered

seungkwan being seungkwan he expects the worst

like you’ve been kidnapped or something

and is so close to calling the police

but he doesn’t

bc you left him a note saying that you’re alright and that he must NOT CALL THE POLICE

and so he doesn’t turn to them but is still restless

on friday he can’t contain it anymore tho

and so he barges into your place by using your spare key and not breaking the door

“Y/N WHERE ARE YOU,,,, oh”

and he sees you in front of your laptop and you look like a zombie

you don’t deny that tho because you pulled an all-nighter

“WTF Y/N WHO GAVE YOU THE AUDACITY TO BLOCK M E?”

“i told you i’m fine”

“you’re fine my A S S when was the last time you took a shower??”

you know you look like a mess,,,,,,,, but did he have to exaggerate?

“seungkwan i’m busy as you can see pls”

but he’s not satisfied with your answer

instead he closes your laptop and tugs you into your living room

and you’re confused,,,,,, like what is going on??

“,,,,, what are you planning to do ???”

but he leaves you on the couch and moments later he comes back with lots of ice cream and chocolate chip cookies

“you’re taking a break from work,,,,, you do know you can die from a heart attack because of overwork right DO NOT DIE”

“i’m not??”

“well obviously bc i’m preventing you from death”

and he puts in your favorite movie and at first you want to rebel

but he then opens the ice cream, spoons out a huge scoop and shoves it into your mouth

but not violently ok he’s not choking you alright

“i can feed myself thank you very much”

and his breath hitches for a moment before he hands you the ice cream and goes for the chocolate chip cookie

you realize he hasn’t taken any bite of the ice cream yet

and so you scoop some of it and hold the spoon in front of it

and he’s giving you a weird look at first

“eat it fast or else it’ll melt and your shirt is ruined”

and he hesitantly accepts it before he settles back and stuffs cookies into his mouth

and you notice his ears turned red,,,, ohohohohoho

is it just you or are you witnessing the boo seungkwan being flustered??

throughout the movie you feel the tiredness washing over you and your eyes start to droop

and before you know it you’re asleep and tilt your head to the side and suddenly seungkwan’s shoulder is your pillow

he tenses up at the contact and is about to jump away but when he sees you fast asleep he loosens up and takes the rest of the ice cream from you

knowing that he’ll wake you up if he moves away or tries to replace himself with a pillow, he resumes watching the movie whilst finishing up the ice cream

and somehow he wraps an arm around you so that you’re nuzzled up against his chest and it’s a much more comfortable position he figures

and once the ending credits roll you wake up

first of all you are utterly confused and surprise bc HOW TF DID YOU MANAGE TO WAKE UP IN SEUNGKWAN’S ARMS

you’re about to break free from his grasp but he instinctively tightens his grip aon you

and so you look up

what do you have there a sleeping seungkwan

bc you don’t want to wake him up from his peaceful sleep you stay still in your arms and wow he smells nice

and bc he’s so adorable

you can’t help but fish out your phone and take pics of him 

partly for blackmail purposes but mainly because the sight of him warms your heart

“y/n delete those pictures right now” he mumbles oh shit

you better not mess with him and delete the pics,,,,, well most of them

finally you cuddle up to him again and find comfort in his warmth

[disasteralex]

A couple weeks ago, my family and I went back to visit British Columbia for the first time in over two years. I can say without any exaggeration that I’ve been missing the province since the day I left it, and coming back felt like a reunion. I’ve made no secret of my love of BC to anyone who knows me, and I hope this post reflects some of that.

DAYS 1-2: AIRPORTS + RELAXING

Our flight was around 3 pm EST, so we left for Pearson airport (late, as always) around 11:45 am just to be careful. I was pretty tired, having worked most of the day before as the final day of my summer job and then hurriedly packing up everything, but I was still excited as hell.

The plane ride itself went pretty well. It’s the first time I’ve flown on an airplane in over two years, but beyond the initial tiny panic at liftoff, the five-ish hours went pretty well, and the plane even got in a little early.

We got into YVR around 5:30, and after picking up the rental car and grabbing some groceries, we drove to the home of the friends we were staying with and caught up with them for most of the night.

We also spent most of the next day relaxing, because all of us were pretty tired and thrown off from the time zone difference, but what can ya do? I also managed to read most of THE SUN AND HER FLOWERS, which I’ll be reviewing at the end of the month. I also Skyped my friends to show them our friends’ dog, because I am that kind of person. It was a pretty cute dog.

    Look!

At this dog!

DAYS 3-4: EXPLORING DELTA

My parents had a wedding to go to the next night, which was our “excuse” for going to BC in the first place, so I spent the next day and a half relaxing a little bit and exploring Delta, the area where we were staying, a little bit. The mom of the family we were staying with, who I jokingly refer to as my second mother probably too much, took me down to Tsawwassen Mills, the huge new(ish) mall there. I live in a pretty averaged-sized city, so I’m used to pretty average-sized malls, but this one was huge—apparently it’s about a million square feet. Also, it was so pretty. I’ve never seen a mall that has so much artwork in it. Also something cool: I heard that because the mall is on Native land, all of the artwork inside it is by First Nations artists. Neat, right? Unfortunately, I’m a bad blogger, so I didn’t manage to take any photos of the mall itself.

I did some more work the next afternoon and helped out the family a bit for the rest of that day. Some of the family we were with had returned from a trip that day, so the house was suddenly a lot louder.

My parents came back the next day, and my dad and I went out to the Boundary Bay Bird Sanctuary, which was really beautiful even though the weather (rainy, cloudy and a little smoky) dampens my photos a little bit. We also saw more herons in the hour or so we spent in the sanctuary than I’ve seen collectively up to that point, so that’s something. (Unfortunately, I only had my regular lens with me, so I don’t have any bird photos to show you. Like I said, bad blogger.)

Boundary Bay Bird Sanctuary, sans birds

DAY 5: DOWNTOWN VANCOUVER (Kits)

The next day we headed to downtown Vancouver to look around. My mom had a meeting with a friend, so my dad and I walked around Kits for a while and then met up with my mom near Kits Beach.

Fun fact: my parents have a very weathered photo that looks almost exactly like this on our fridge from like 20 years ago.

Look at that skyline!

My parents actually lived in Kits for a while, so they know the area pretty well and have a special place in their heart for it. I do, too. It’s a really cute little hipster-ish place, and turning the corner and getting a great view of the ocean and mountains is pretty neat, too. Even if it is a little weird.

saw an electronic sign outside a house near Kits Beach the other day that read “they are too tired to regret it” and I still have so many questions

— A. C. Wyatt (@alexisabooknerd) August 30, 2018

Next we walked down to Teetotaler Beach, which is pretty small but also a pretty great place to stick your feet in the ocean if you so desire, and then we drove down to Spanish Banks. Spanish Banks probably had the best views of the mountains and the Vancouver skyline, but Teetotaler Beach is still pretty neat, too.

Teetotaler Beach

Spanish Banks

We got home a little early, had dinner and hung out a little more, and then tried our best to pack and get to bed early for our trip the next day. I wasn’t very successful at that.

DAYS 6-7: NANAIMO, UCLUELET + TOFINO

I woke up at 6:45 the next day, which I wasn’t very fond of, but luckily I was able to get a little sleep on the ferry itself. I had wanted to get some photos on the ferry, but sleep called. Oh well. I have some photos from the last trip if you wanna look at them.

We got into Nanaimo around 11 am, and then slowly made our way up to Ucluelet. On our way there, we stopped off at Cameron Lake and hiked down to take a look at the view. And it was a pretty great view, if I do say so myself.

Cameron Lake, which kind of doesn’t look real

We continued on to the Cathedral Trail. It reminded me a lot of Lighthouse Park, to be honest, and mostly because of the trees themselves. You don’t see huge trees like that anywhere in Ontario, and seeing them here was more than welcome. I don’t tend to get out a lot when I’m in Ontario, partly because I’m busy with school and work and partly because there aren’t a lot of places to hike where I’m from (and also partly because I’m lazy). I probably exercised more on this trip than I did in the previous two months. Whoops. But I didn’t mind; I loved being around the scenery here.

Walking into the Cathedral Trail

Look, I just thought it was pretty.

I don’t ever think I’ve ever seen trees this tall.

We finally got into Ucluelet around 3 pm, and spent about an hour or so recharging before my dad and I set off to hike the trail around the Amphitrite Lighthouse. To be honest, I chose it purely because I’m a Classics major and I love all things mythology-related, but the trail itself certainly didn’t disappoint. It reminded me a lot of a hike we did in Victoria on the Dallas Road Waterfront Trail the last time we were here, but honestly, I think the views were better on this one.

Look! At this view!

The Amphitrite lighthouse itself

Even though it was pretty sunny out, the fog followed.

Once we finished the trail, which probably took us about an hour with all our collective photo stops, we went back to our hotel and then went out for dinner.

The three of us headed up closer to Tofino the next morning. It was supposed to be a little rainier and colder that day, so we didn’t want to plan too much, but we all decided to go down to Wickaninnish Beach. Like I said, it was a little rainy and cloudy that day, which normally doesn’t make for great photos, but it added a mysterious effect to this beach that was cool. Also, we found a jellyfish (or what looked like one) on the beach, which was pretty neat. I got some interesting photos of me posing like an idiot for my Instagram, too, so that was a bonus.

So much fog.

We spent about an hour-ish just walking around the beach before we got back in the car and headed up to Schooner Cove. It was mostly the same as Wickaninnish Beach, but a little more populated and with much better views. It also took a lot longer to get to, even though the scenery made up for it. We spent a while walking along Long Beach, which, as you guessed it, is very long, but also very pretty to look at.

Honestly, this might be my favourite photo that I took on this trip.

The view on the trail

Actually, scratch that. It might be this one.

After we got back from the beach, we puttered around the gift shop for a little bit, bought some things, and headed into Tofino to look around.

We were told by our family friends that Tofino was touristy and a little kitschy, but honestly, I loved it. It’s a cute little town with a lot of small, unique shops and cafes, and it was something I honestly haven’t seen before. Unfortunately, I was too exhausted to take many photos, so you’ll have to visit there yourself to really find out what it’s like.

After another hour or so, it was time to head back to Nanaimo to catch our ferry. We made a couple stops along the way, including a quick one down at Sproat Lake to get a picture of the water, but we got back to Nanaimo around 7:30-ish. By 10:30, we were back in Delta to get everything unpacked and ready for the next day.

Sproat Lake, another very nice lake

View from the ferry, which is pretty fuzzy but also look at those COLOURS

DAYS 8-9: GRANVILLE ISLAND AND DOWNTOWN (Fairview, Mount Pleasant)

The next day we decided to head to Granville Island, which might just be my favourite places in Vancouver. I honestly have never seen a quirkier and more unique place than Granville Island. It’s just so vibrant and colourful and almost magical in a way I’ve never encountered before. I could easily spend the rest of my life on Granville Island if it wasn’t so expensive. But there are a lot of seagulls there, so maybe not.

Seriously, so. Many. Seagulls.

There’s so much art around Granville Island and I think it’s so neat.

This is a little shop called BC Blacksmith, where all of the artwork was super unique and beautiful. I’m not very familiar with metalwork, but I thought this was really neat.

When we got back home, the family we were staying with were having a little party, so that was a more than welcome way to end the night.

The next day was pretty chill for us—everyone was a little tired from the night before, and my parents and I had decided to take it easy for our last full day in BC. We lounged around for a bit in the morning, and headed downtown again to look at a few places. My mom had to scout out a café for a thing she’s working on (shh, it’s a secret), and I was told about a really cool bookstore I apparently just HAD to see. (Spoiler alert: it was cool.)

DAY 10: TRAVEL HOME

Look, man, I hate leaving BC just as much as I love going there, so the last day of our trip was a pretty somber affair for all of us. Our flight back to Ontario boarded at about 2:20 pm PST, so after a morning of packing and reluctant goodbyes, we left our friends’ house and left for the airport.

It’s hard for me to articulate how I feel about BC, and the Vancouver area especially. I feel a kind of peace there that I’ve never felt anywhere else. Coming back here was hard—enough so that it took me extra long to finish this, to the point of this post being a day (and a half) late. But even though I’m back home now, I know it won’t be long until I visit BC again.

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British Columbia Travel Diaries: Vancouver, Ucluelet and Tofino | A. C. Wyatt A couple weeks ago, my family and I went back to visit British Columbia for the first time…

[goldenscript]

HEY HEY it’s fine, your health always comes first! my friday was really interesting and today i finally went grocery shopping so there’s that. how’s your weekend so far? LMAO UR LITERALLY ME. i often feel detached from people or even myself but it takes .0000081 seconds for a tear to slip out when im reading or watching anime. omg i cried sm the second season of haikyuu bc like.. my baby oiks deserved to go to nationals man, seijoh deserved to go ;-; dont get me wrong i was sooo proud of (1/?)

our crows but like.. oikawa!!! i watched a couple episodes of avatar yesterday and i already love how flawed zuko is, you can see it right from the start. i already know what happens tho okay HAHAH. AND GIRL IM SO HYPED FOR INFINITY WAR!! LIKE aSDJD I CANT EVEN EXPRESS HOW I FEEL, SHIT’S BOUT TO GO DOWN. WHICH REMINDS ME, BOKU NO HERO ACADEMIA IS SET IN A UNIVERSE WITH SUPERHEROES AND IT’S HONESTLY V CUTE. which ALSO reminds me i had a fic draft about how an ex-superhero mc who’s next door (2/?)             

who’s next door neighbors with a notorious anti-hero (superrrr orig ik, i was like in 9th grade ok i’m cringing) and she finds out about him through some funny circumstances bc for one, she’s not dumb. she can piece it together. she lost her powers in some way and is trynna adjust to reg human life and she doesn’t want anything to do with playing hero anymore bc of uh “PLOT.” shit happens. never got past the 3rd chapter lol which made me realize that long fics weren’t for me, i lose (3/?)

motivation too fast but it just sucks bc idk how to condense it enough for it to be a oneshot. when i randomly write, they still hit up to 20k so I DONT KNOW?? maybe i just write too much. i’m just as disorganized as i was 4-5 years ago ;; AH FF(.)net AND QUOTEV. GOOD OL’ TIMES. the first fic i read was about infinite’s woohyun bc he was my bby at the time lmaooo. and wow  i’d love to read your revamped fics and whatever else you have in mind!! the thing about fantasy is that it’s so broad (4/?)        

u can literally do anything with it!! LMAO WELL I MEAN TBRH IT’S JUST BTS but HM WHO DO YOU THINK MAtCHES THE JOB DESCRIPTIONS?? wink wink. ALSO sorry that i talk so much omg u must hate reading my messages lmao i feel like i always have a lot to say (5/5!!!)  -sjsu    

lemme just say that i don’t hate getting your messages at all ok!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel like i have a lot to say especially when the topics are within my interests and girl talking to me abt cringey fanfics, ugly crying over sports anime, & black panther are perfect enough reasons to babble over! i promise!!!!!!!! i look forward to talking to you girl (’:

thank you! i honestly just went out to my friend’s bday dinner yesterday night and chilled at home all day today. i’m supposed to hang with my dad and probably go out driving tomorrow so we’ll see. as of rn, i’m fooling myself into thinking that i’m gonna work on my english paper rn but i’m compromising and telling myself to just find quotes and write my thesis then saving the actually writing for tomorrow. but LMAO I’M GLAD YOU CAN RELATE. I WORRY THAT I’M ALONE ON THIS SOMETIMES. yeah, i detach easily and i don’t mean to but sometimes i prefer to let my mind drift and daydream because it’s so much more interesting than day to day life. buT I GET SO EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN ANIME OK. I CRIED FOR SEASON TWO ALSO. LIKE OIKAWA WAS SO HARDWORKING AND FUCK WHEN THEY LOST TO THE CROWS I WAS SO SAD BC I HONESTLY WISHED THEY COULD BOTH WIN SOMEHOW. like fuck that anime is good, making us sympathize and love like literally everyone you meet because the biggest antagonist in that damn show is time and how one minor point just fucks everyone over and kjsdhfsjkdhf i love haikyuu!! sooooo much. god

LMAO IT’S OK. i spoil myself a lot with shows and movies bc i’m a big like movie person especially in the MCU and horror cuz i like knowing that what i’m watching is worth all the fuss (this goes for most movies in general) although for black panther i didn’t spoil myself because i could feel it in my gut that it would end my entire existence and guess what it did? ended my entire existence. AND OMG INFINITY WAR SDFSDKJHF I’M SOLELY WATCHING IT FOR T’CHALLA TBH. I NEEDA KNOW WHAT ELSE IS GONNA HAPPEN WITH HIM AND THE REST OF WAKANDA OK. AND OMG IT IS? I LOVE THAT. OK FOR SURE I’M WATCHING IT OK.

i only played an interactive story app abt superheroes and it was so freakin’ cool. now this makes me want to replay it ‘cuz it’s just a trip man. the story line is great and i love the idea of superpowers. and omg that story of yours sounds so cool! like imo a trope / plot can seem “cliche” but how you execute it is what really makes the biggest different! like make me feel!!! make me love and hate your characters!!!!!!!! but yeah, honestly, i’m really starting to disbelieve in my skills at writing multi-part fics bc it’s a STRUGGLE. i write to finish i think. but i’m challenging myself to write series bc i have a few that i reallyyyyyyyyyyy want to write. and holy shit 20k????????? that’s amazing! i’ve only done that like once and i haven’t read it in hella long.

whenever i get around to it (man, i’m starting to get annoyed with myself for using this phrase kjsdhkjfsh), i will most def hit you up!!!!!!!! my first fic was like......... uh.... fuck i can’t even remember but i will admit i did try writing twilight fanfic too. in terms of kpop, my first was this jungkook drabble that i never saved and actually deleted after a few days but another one was this yoongi drabble that i currently have up rn that isn’t too bad. but ok girl telling me, a girl who thrives off structure and a basis, that something is broad is HELL for me. like i really need to think things over and make sure it makes sense and it’s just hard. i struggle but i’m trying.

rjgnkjsgkjsdhfkjshf alright, alright mundane jobs for earth-bound bts:

jin: cafeteria lady (sorry bb), everyone loves him, his station’s the cleanest, and no one hates him like............. at all. not even Boss, who everyone FEARS

yoongi: janitor but not really he doesn’t clean and his boss loves him too much to make him do work

hobi: retail worker bc he will not let any atrocity walk out of the store no matter what, doesn’t need his powers to get anyone to buy anything, makes pouches A Thing

joon: librarian, likes to observe ppl, somehow likes humanity even tho we’re messes (”aren’t we all messes, after all?”)

jimin & tae: delivery boys aka the bats bc they move like they’re coming straight out of hell

jungkook: mcd cashier, hates his job, sometimes gives people melted ice cream bc they looked at him funny

[jaeminlore]

Adventure // Na Jaemin

-

the prompt: can you write a prince!jaemin au bc i love that boy sm pls.

words: 4800

category fluff + minor angst

author note: i love him sm too. also this is lowkey from a tolkien quote: “I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it’s very difficult to find anyone.”

- destinee

-

You sat around the dinner table with your grandparents, unable to return the bright smiles they sent your way.

Did they even hear themselves?

“What do you mean the prince is going to live with us? This is a joke, right?”

Your grandfather patted your shoulder comfortingly in a way only grandfather’s can do. “With the threats to the castle, Her Majesty has requested that we hide him here. No assassin will think to look in a blacksmith’s home.”

“You work for the queen,” you argued. “Won’t they suspect you and the rest of the staff when they can’t find the prince?”

Your grandmother butted in. “Her Majesty has made her decision final. Prince Jaemin will come to be under our secret care until the assassins are caught.”

“What do we do with a prince?” You asked in confusion. As far as you knew, he was probably spoiled and not used to working. What would he do while you and your grandparents were working?

“He’ll help you with your rounds around the town.” Your grandmother answered calmly, as if she and your grandfather had already discussed it.

As your grandfather was a blacksmith, you often delivered the orders he finished to the customers. It wasn’t a hard job, and after delivering you usually arrived home and helped your grandfather clean the tools and weapons he had worked on that day.

“When is he coming?” You asked.

“Tomorrow morning,” your grandfather replied, “Your grandmother will be going to the healer tomorrow so I need you to go to the market and pick him up. Then you can pick up our groceries.”

“Okay,” you replied, knowing it was useless to argue with him.

Even if you were skeptical about the prince coming, you definitely weren’t going to defy your grandparents. You had lived with them since you were a child, and you knew there was no use in trying to argue with them.

You struggled to sleep as you anticipated what would happen the next day.

-

Despite your grandparents’ protests, you didn’t wear your nicest clothes to meet the prince.

The last thing you wanted was to stick out like a sore thumb in the middle of the market. You didn’t care if Prince Jaemin stuck out on his own; that was his problem.

You walked to the market with your rucksack hanging from your shoulders. You were told that the prince would be arriving in a carriage near the strawberry stand.

“Mark!” You said cheerily as soon as you saw your friend who worked the strawberry stand. “I’ll take a pound of strawberries, please.”

“A pound?” Mark laughed as he began to weigh the red fruit. “That’s a lot more than usual.”

“Well, Grandmother want to make a strawberry pie for a guest we have.”

Mark’s father was also close to the royal family, being their top agricultural worker. “Oh, right. I’ll go let him know you’re here.”

You handed him the proper amount of change and packed the strawberries safely in your rucksack before Mark went back behind his stand.

“Y/n, this is Jaemin. Jaemin, this is Y/n,” Mark said, pulling a tan boy behind him.

You watched him, only to widen your eyes and look down. You didn’t remember the prince being that handsome. His black hair was a bit too long, and his smile was wide. You had never seen whiter teeth in your life.

“Hi, Y/n.” As if he wasn’t in line to be the future king, Jaemin held his hand out for you to shake. “Call me Jaemin, since I’m incognito.”

Indeed, he was. Dressed almost identical to you and Mark, he looked ready to face the village in his brown leather trousers, his tucked in and baggy beige shirt, and his knee-length boots.

You could tell they weren’t his everyday clothes, for they were far too clean, showing no blemish or tear anywhere.

“Hi, Jaemin. We’ve got some shopping to do before we get home. Is that okay?” You spoke formally, wondering if you would be thrown in jail for saying something wrong or looking the prince in the eyes.

Jaemin must’ve noticed, because he stopped you and placed both hands on your shoulders. He pushed them so they weren’t so tense and smiled at you. You really weren’t sure if you were ever going to get used to that smile.

“Just speak casually, Y/n.” Jaemin widened his smile. “We’re friends so let’s talk like it.”

“Alright,” you spoke, gently moving out of his grip. “Then we need flour, sugar, and eggs before we return home to help Grandfather.���

“What’re we making?” Jaemin asked. There was a certain bounce in his step that you couldn’t pinpoint. Perhaps he was just a peppy person.

“My grandmother wants to make you a strawberry pie.”

Jaemin walked beside you, quiet for a moment. Then he piped, “What if we make the pie for your grandmother?”

“What’s the difference?” You asked, stopping at the booth where a local was selling flour. You accepted the large sack after you paid and turned, handing it to Jaemin.

The prince didn’t complain, he only shifted the bag in a more comfortable position and kept walking. “The difference is that your grandmother doesn’t have to bake a pie! She’ll be so surprised!”

“That’s a sweet idea,” you sighed, “but I don’t know how to bake a pie.”

“You don’t have to know. I know how to bake pies.” Jaemin surprised you with his words. “My servant taught me how to cook and bake.”

Your furrowed your brows. “Why would a prince have to learn how to bake?”

“I didn’t have to,” Jaemin corrected you. “I asked her to teach me. I surprised my mom with an apple pie for her birthday and the smile on her face was so worth all the effort. So, let’s make a pie for your grandmother. I’ll help you.”

“Okay,” you whispered. “Let’s hurry home then, because I still have to deliver my grandfather’s orders this morning.”

“I’ll help you with that, too. That way we’ll finish two times quicker than you would doing it alone.”

By this time, you had found the woman who sold sugar, and you hastily paid her for the correct measurement you needed. Then you led Jaemin out of the marketplace, toward your home.

-

You were glad Jaemin was so good at keeping conversation up. The boy never seemed to run out of anything to say. Especially when the two of you arrived at your grandfather’s smithing shop after dropping the ingredients and Jaemin’s luggage off at your house.

He just couldn’t believe how many swords and other miscellaneous weapons covered your grandfather’s walls. “This is the same design our knights have,” Jaemin said to you in fascination.

You ignored him, not out of rudeness, but out of lack of anything to say. Instead, you turned to your grandfather. “How many orders today?”

“Only one,” he replied, handing you a pair of long knives wrapped tightly in burlap. “Deliver this to Madam Burk across the lake, and then you’re done.”

“What does Madam Burk want with long knives?” You asked skeptically.

Jaemin walked over and peaked over your shoulder. All that could be seen of the knives were the carefully carved hilts. “Wow!”

He traced over the intricate details on the stained wood. “How long did this take?”

While he and your grandfather bonded over weapons, you felt far too aware of how close the prince was to you. His chest kept brushing against your shoulder and any time he laughed he would look at you, perhaps wondering if you laughed as well.

You were well aware by now that Jaemin had no respect for personal space. The boy was playful and curious, and he wasn’t about to let something silly like personal boundaries keep him from discovering new things around him.

It was cute to you, the way his eyes lit up when he saw something he found interesting. He was currently nodding his head eagerly as he listened to your grandfather explain the painstakingly boring process of staining wood. If he nodded his head any more, you were sure it was going to fall right off his neck.

“I should really get these to Madam Burk.” You interrupted their talk. “You guys can stay here and talk, though. I’ll be right back.”

Jaemin shook his head and followed you out of the forge. “I’m coming with you! I want to see Madam Burk.”

“You don’t know Madam Burk,” you told him calmly.

“I want to know her,” Jaemin pointed out.

You let out a breathy chuckle. He never ran out of curiosity, that was for sure. “Let’s go then.”

-

Although you were used to a busy schedule with your grandparents, you certainly weren’t used to doing any of it with the level of enthusiasm Jaemin had.

You still weren’t sure how he got the grumpy Madam Burk to smile for him and invite the both of you in for tea.

This little unplanned visit set your schedule back slightly, so you and Jaemin were quick to return to your house to prepare the pie for your grandmother.

“She should be back within the hour,” you told Jaemin as you cut up the strawberries.

He was busy kneading the homemade dough, “So, at the least, it would be in the oven when she returned. That would be just as well.”

While you cut the fruit in silence, you noticed Jaemin staring at you from the corner of his eye. “What?”

Jaemin chuckled and looked away. “I just find it odd that you haven’t asked me about my life as a prince yet. Don’t you want to know what the castle looks like on the inside? Or how many servants we actually have?”

“Should I?” You asked. “None of those matters concern me in the slightest.”

“You aren’t the least bit curious?” Jaemin pondered aloud, sounding offended.

“You can tell me if you want,” you permitted. “I’m just letting you know that I haven’t really wondered about it before.”

“I’ll take it,” Jaemin said contently. “Let me tell you about my dream: to be a knight.”

Jaemin began to roll out the properly kneaded dough, shaping it into the pie plate accordingly. “So, your grandfather obviously does a lot of the castle’s weapon work. In fact, my mother gave me the option of staying with Mark’s family, since I knew him, but I wanted to go here instead because I look up to your grandfather.”

“Really?” You found it hard to believe. Sure, your grandfather was a lovely man, but he wasn’t extraordinary or anything.

“Yeah,” Jaemin smiled. “Your grandfather was never a knight, but his craftsmanship for weapons really inspires me. Ever since I was little I wanted to become a knight and be the best swordsman in the kingdom. I wanted to go on quests with my fellow knights and sleep outside by a campfire, fending off wolves with nothing but a stick and a flame.”

“You seem to have thought about it a lot,” you mentioned.

“Of course; it’s my dream.” Jaemin then changed the subject. “Let’s make the filling next.”

You grabbed a large bowl and brought it over to the counter. While you dumped the cut strawberries into the bowl, Jaemin measured out the additional ingredients.

“Tell me more about this dream of yours,” you spoke up, now intrigued.

“Well, there isn’t much more to it,” Jaemin sighed. “The reality is that I’m a prince, not a knight. It’s my duty to stay in the castle and prepare to rule the kingdom one day. While I do have swordsmanship lessons, it’s nothing like a knight’s training. It’s okay, though. One day, when I’m king, I’ll go on my own quest.”

Without thinking, the words popped into your brain. “We could go on a quest now.”

Jaemin dropped the wooden spoon he was holding, and watched as it clattered to the ground. “What?”

“We could have our own adventure!” You said.

“What would we do?” Jaemin’s eyes suddenly widened in excitement. “Where would we go?”

You pondered his questions as you poured the filling into the pie crust. “Let’s stick this in the oven and then we’ll talk about it.”

Once the pie was safely in the oven, you and Jaemin went to your room to talk about the quest in secret.

“There’s a waterfall in the forest,” you said. “We could go jump off of it. Or we could go search some of the caves nearby and see if we can find something cool.”

“We could look for jewels!” Jaemin said, agreeing with your second option. “We’ll need to bring pickaxes, in case we want to go mining for stones.”

“Okay,” you said. “Tomorrow, after our chores, let’s go on an adventure.”

-

“I honestly don’t think your grandmother would’ve let us leave if we hadn’t baked her that pie,” Jaemin said as he two of you walked towards the forest.

You rolled your eyes. “You’re the prince. She probably didn’t want to get on your family’s bad side.”

“Even so, it’s great luck that your grandfather had some pickaxes for us,” Jaemin spoke, holding his own pickaxe over his shoulder. “Do you think we’ll find anything?”

“I don’t know,” you said.

At that, the two of you stayed silent for the rest of the journey. The forest outside of the kingdom was very dense, with tall oak trees growing so close to each other their branches intermingled with each other.

It created a foliage roof for the two of you to walk under. Protected from the hot sun, you and Jaemin both enjoyed the fresh air at a slow pace. You were in no hurry to get to the caves.

“Woah!” Jaemin stopped, and since he was a bit ahead of you, you ran into his back.

“Oomph!” You grunted in discomfort. “Why’d you stop so suddenly?”

“Look.” Jaemin pointed to a small animal standing in the middle of a trail. “I’ve never seen one in real life.”

“A rabbit?” You found yourself giggling at the frigid look on the prince’s face. “Here, let’s go say hello.”

Jaemin opened his mouth to protest as you grabbed his hand and pulled him closer to the animal. Once you were only a few feet away, you slipped your bag off of your back and pulled out a carrot.

You handed it to Jaemin. “Hold it out for the rabbit.”

Jaemin refused. “What if it bites me?”

“It won’t,” you assured him.

“Do it with me, please.” Jaemin said, cutting his gaze to yours.

You obliged, finding humor in the situation. “Hold your palm out.”

You placed the carrot in Jaemin’s open palm and held his wrist. “Now wait for the rabbit to notice.”

With a few clicks of your tongue, you got the animal’s attention. The rabbit’s nose twitched as it noticed the orange vegetable.

You felt Jaemin tense in nervousness, so you patted his shoulder with your hand. “Rabbit’s really aren’t that scary, Jaemin.”

When the rabbit hopped over and sniffed the carrot, both of you stilled. Finally, Jaemin broke into a soft smile when the rabbit grabbed the carrot with its teeth and pulled it away from you both.

“See? They’re harmless.” You said, helping Jaemin to his feet.

The prince breathed a sigh of relief. “To be fair, I thought their teeth were a lot bigger than that.”

-

The caves consisted of around five cave openings that started at the end of the forest and all connected together. Eventually, they led into a mountain, but no one ever went that deep into the caves. It was said to be as virtually impossible to escape as a life size maze the deeper you went, so you were sure to warn Jaemin not to wander off.

Guess who didn’t listen to you?

“Jaemin!” You rounded yet another corner of the cave and looked around for the prince. “We need to stick together.”

You weren’t sure what kind of trouble the prince would get himself into. Truthfully, you were more worried about the creatures that could possibly live in any of these hidden crevices.

“Y/n!” Jaemin’s voice suddenly shouted.

You darted towards the voice, worried that he had somehow gotten hurt already. “I’m coming!”

When you found him, he was not hurt at all. In fact, he looked fairly content, crouching in front of the lake that was hidden in the cave’s interior.

He stirred the water with his finger. “Look, Y/n. There are little fish here and they aren’t scared of me.”

“That’s because they’re blind.” You said, and followed up by explaining why.

“Oh,” Jaemin looked disappointed. “I thought they were just really brave fish.”

You snorted. “You have a naive mind. Has anyone ever told you that?”

Jaemin looked up. “Yeah. My mom says I need a more practical sense of the world if I’m going to rule the kingdom.”

You dropped you bag and rolled your shoulders back a few times before sitting beside him. He was still stirring the water with his fingers.

“I don’t think being naive is necessarily a bad thing,” you said. “As long as you have other qualities as well, I don’t think you have to be practical to run a kingdom.”

“What qualities?” Jaemin queried.

“Well, for instance, compassion. Or being a hard worker. Having empathy for others, especially in a lower position than you is a great trait as well. I think your mother might be worried about your willingness to trust people so quickly. Once you’re king, people will want to use your friendship for selfish reasons, so I think she just wants to make sure you don’t get hurt.”

“That’s exactly why I’m making friends now,” Jaemin said. “So when I’m king, I can have loyal people by my side, helping me with the qualities I might lack.”

You were silent for a moment. Jaemin really was a mystery to you. Since he was usually hyper and fully of vigor, you never expected him to be this solemn. Then again, he was only a teenager, so it must be hard on him knowing he must rule the whole kingdom one day.“

“Is that why you want to be a knight?” You dared to ask him.

“Yeah,” Jaemin breathed. “I could be myself if I was a knight. I wouldn’t have to worry about anything. A knight’s greatest trait is loyalty, and I can offer that easily.”

You nodded in understanding. It seemed that was all Jaemin needed. Perhaps letting his worries out in the darkness of a cave was good for him, for he went right back to his normal self, eager to dig for jewels.

Neither of you found any jewels or special stones that day, but maybe that was never what the journey was about anyway.

-

Your grandparents let you and Jaemin sleep in the next day, after being exhausted from your adventure. After all, two seventeen year olds need their sleep, no matter how much they might assure you they don’t.

Still, you and Jaemin only slept in about an hour later than usual. Some of his energy must’ve transferred to you, for you found yourself wanting to go on yet another adventure.

Instead, you were stuck inside, thanks to lightening and pouring rain that occurred outside. Your grandmother was still under the weather, so you did her usual work while Jaemin hung out with your grandfather in the forge.

Once you were done with your work, you made sandwiches and brought them into the forge.

“Y/n! You’re alive!” Jaemin showed you his never-wavering grin as you walked in.

You set the plate of lunch down and eyed the longsword in Jaemin’s hand. “What’re you doing?”

“Your grandfather said I could whet a design into the hilt. Want to help?”

You agreed and dragged a stool over to watch him. You nibbled on your sandwich and watch over his shoulder as he struggled to carve a design into the wood. “What design are you going to do?”

“I want to do my family’s crest, but I think it’ll be too hard to do.” Jaemin said. “Since this is the only chance I have, I want to design something simpler.”

“Why don’t you make your own crest,” you suggested. “Something easier but just as significant. It could remind you of the time you spent here.”

Jaemin pondered your suggesting for a moment before nodding. “I should do our initials!”

“No!” You protested, color rising into your cheeks at a quick rate. “That could be taken a wrong way.”

“So?” Jaemin chuckled. “I want to remember our time together. We don’t know when I’ll have to leave, so I want to enjoy our friendship while it lasts.”

Your grandfather announced that he was going to go check on his wife, and grabbed a sandwich on the way out.

“You know you’re welcome back anytime,” you told Jaemin. There was nothing you liked about the idea that he might not come back.

The prince had wedged his way into your heart in a mere three days, and you weren’t about to give up that easily.

“I wish,” Jaemin said. “And I promise I would if I ever have the time, but my schedule is so busy nowadays. I’m sure it’ll be worse when I get back, since I’ll be behind.”

You frowned. “Well, can’t I come visit? I know I’m not royalty or whatever but I could help you with your princely duties or something.”

Jaemin chuckled. “I doubt you want to help with all the boring stuff I do. But I would love for you to be there, just as company.”

“You mean it?” You asked.

“Of course I do,” Jaemin said. Then he bumped your shoulder playfully. “Don’t think you’re the only one who feels this way.”

You could only blush and look away.

-

Jaemin felt closer to you after that. Somewhere along the way, between the second and third week of living with your family, he decided that you would appreciate it if he clung onto you like a koala whenever he felt like it.

Which would explain your current predicament, struggling to clean your grandfather’s tools while Jaemin had his arms around your waist and his chin on your shoulder.

Not only could you not concentrate, you also couldn’t breathe properly because of his close proximity.

It was no surprise to you when you began to like Jaemin as more than a friend. Although you regretted it sometimes, it wasn’t like you could just erase your feelings. If Jaemin wasn’t so clingy, it would be much easier to smother your feelings deep down until he left to go back to the castle.

“Can I help?” He asked.

You turned to look at him, but quickly terminated the action when you noticed how close his face was to yours. “Yeah, just grab a rag and a tool or weapon.”

Jaemin let go of you and grabbed a rag and a dagger that seemed particularly dirty. You didn’t watch as he cleaned, having your own object to polish. That was why you were so surprised to hear Jaemin hiss in pain a drop the dagger onto the stone table nearby.

“What happened?” You asked, eyeing the cut that ran down the prince’s palm. It was bleeding steadily, so you told him to sit while you ran to get some supplies.

You returned only a few moments later to Jaemin sitting on the stool with his head down.

“Alright, Jaemin. Give me your hand,” you ordered him gently.

He held out his hand, which you could already see was swollen and infected from the dirty blade. “Now, can you explain to me what happened?”

While he explained, you poured disinfectant onto a clean rag. “I was just cleaning the dagger.”

“How did you clean it?” You asked, apologizing quickly afterwards as you began to dab the medicine on his wounds.

Jaemin hissed quietly, the veins in his wrist tensing for a moment before returning back to normal. “I rubbed the rag up and down the blade.”

“Did you hold circle your palm around the blade?”

“I thought that’s what you were supposed to do,” Jaemin defended himself.

You began to wrap his hand. “No, you should never do that. Next time, try a buffering technique.”

“What’s that?”

“Umm,” you struggled to explain. “Like, wipe the sword with the rag but only clean one side at a time. Use circular motions, I guess? I’ve never explained it before, but I’ll show you how to do it eventually.”

“Thanks.” Jaemin grinned and held up his wrapped hand. “I dare say you could be a healer with this kind of skill.”

“I’m just doing what I was taught.”

“You know, I never asked. What’s your dream, Y/n?” Jaemin asked, peering at you inquisitively.

You hummed in thought before answering. “I don’t know yet. I kind of just want to get married and have a family. Isn’t that too plain for a dream?”

“No.” Jaemin smiled at you. “That’s a nice dream to have. It offers security.”

“I think so,” you agreed. “I mean, obviously I want to do a bunch of stuff before I get to that point. For instance, I want to find a rare jewel before you do.”

Jaemin returned your teasing smile with a laugh. “No way! I’ll definitely beat you with at that dream.”

-

A few nights later, a messenger from the castle came and informed your grandparents that the assassin was captured and Jaemin was to return to the castle the next morning. You ended up taking the news harder than you thought you would, but you able to hide your emotions while you hung out with Jaemin.

Now, however, it was nighttime and you were on top of your roof, watching the stars twinkle in their vast environment. Up here no one could stop you from moping.

You didn’t want to lose Jaemin. He was your closest friend. As much as you despised the idea of the prince living with you, now you wouldn’t trade these past weeks for the world.

“You just had to hide somewhere I didn’t know, didn’t you?” Jaemin’s voice brought you out of your reverie.

“What are you doing up?” You asked. He had been asleep when you left.

“Well, I woke up and wanted to see if you would take a walk with me. I guess you’re a step ahead, though.”

“Not quite,” you said, “I’m not walking.”

“Even so, this seems like a nicer option than walking. Do you come up here often?” Jaemin sat beside you, close enough for your shoulders to brush.

“When I want to be alone, this is where I go,” you answered. Then, seeing the recognition on Jaemin’s face, you retracted your statement. “I don’t mind you being here though!”

“Oh, good, because I have something to tell you.”

“What?” You asked, curious as to what he would say.

This could be the last time you ever talked to him. You weren’t sure what the future held, and you were honestly afraid of what was coming.

A small part of your heart didn’t want to admit it, but you weren’t sure you would be able to forget Jaemin easily. He had become your favorite person, and all you could think about was that tomorrow, you would go back to being strangers.

Jaemin sat up and grabbed something out of his back pocket. “Here. I win.”

You caught the box he threw to you and opened it. The black velvet should’ve warned you what was inside, for there was a ring topped with a bright red ruby.

“I found it a few days ago,” Jaemin explained. “Granted, it was at a stall in the marketplace and not inside of a cave. I thought you would like it anyway.”

“I do,” you assured him. “What’s it for?”

Jaemin inhaled nervously, “Well, since I’m leaving tomorrow, I thought about how much I wanted you to remember me. So, if you want, it’s a promise ring. A friendship ring, even. Whatever your comfortable with. This way, you won’t forget me.”

You slipped it over your finger. “I promise Jaemin, I could never forget you.”

“Good,” he said, staring at you as you looked at the ring. “Because I won’t forget you either.”

-

The next morning came quickly, and in a blur.

You couldn’t quite pinpoint the emotion you were feeling as Jaemin climbed into a carriage that would send him back to the castle.

Heartbreak seemed too extreme, and yet it seemed too tame as well.

You held onto the ring as the carriage began to drive down the road.

Please don’t forget me, Jaemin.

~to be continued~

[lysitheaioandeuropa]

1-100 cute questions

:~)

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?- more cereal than milk! it has to be crunchy and milk is fucking gross, even though i use almond milk instead

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?- FUCK yeah, especially if it's also sunny outside

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?- grocery receipts are the usual culprit. maybe i should make my own bookmarks!

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?- rn i'm having sugar free white chocolate w half & half and 3 splenda

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?- i'm self conscious of my entire existence my friend

6: do you keep plants?- yes! she gave me and orchid and a bamboo plant a while back, and i have ian my aloe/succulent

7: do you name your plants?- lmfao yes, ian! she named the bamboo melman, and i never named the orchid. zack and sabrina are no longer w us unfortunately

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?- i used to write and draw a lot. i don't get a chance to do it as often now but i rly am trying more. i'll even try my hand at inktober this year but yikes scared bc i can't actually draw

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?- hell yeah bitch if i am in the mood for it

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?- all of the above? lmao. my back is most cozy but sleep paralysis, so a mix of side stomach like its a specific diagonal ass position on my bed lol

11: what's an inner joke you have with your friends?- "coming this soon"

12: what's your favorite planet?- FUCKING JUPITER BRO OMFG MY URL ARE TWO OF MY FAVE MOONS OF JUPITER TEST ME BITCH

13: what's something that made you smile today?- i don't think i've smiled today? maybe something michelle said earlier when we went to lowe's

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?- *takes pics of my current place*might have a little more aesthetic to it just bc location though. and if i live in a bigger city than orlando that means i have more money to REALLY fulfill my aesthetic wishes

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!- Recent work by planetary scientists has indicated that the deep atmospheres of Jupiter and Saturn may contain chunks of diamond floating in a liquid hydrogen-helium fluid. MEANING, it rains diamonds on jupiter

16: what's your favorite pasta dish?- permission crusted chicken, w angel hair in a lemon butter sauce

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?- i was going for a magenta over the summer and was p successful but my mom paid for me to not keep lightening and shit, that wasn't my money so idc lol rn its auburn-ish. i rly do still want a light blond/almost gray though

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.- the time i got incredibly drunk, like, throwing up and dying can't even walk drunk like wow i'm not like that lmao so when that happens it's wild

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?- i have multiple journals and a sketch book. the sketch book is whatever i feel inspired to draw atm and bc thats so rare i just be picking it up and going lmao. i hardly write anymore, these questions kinda keep me going

20: what's your favorite eye color?- light brown is vastly underrated tbh, like yeah green is cool but i have always been a sucker for hazel or just noticeably lighter brown eyes. i remember this one boy in the 8th grade had me swooning w that alone lmao and ofc my gf now its soo nice

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that's been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.- i no longer have it, but i had the same jansport since the seventh grade. i used to customize it and sew on letters or iron on, change it up ever so often, and got rid of it senior year of high school

22: are you a morning person?- i really am not, but everyone thinks i am since i'm up at 6am even the days i ain't got shit to do

23: what's your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?- PLAY VIDEO GAMES. draw, do these questions, sometimes even brainstorm ideas about books i'll never write

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?- shit every single one of them? well nvm, yeah there is. jordan. that's my ride or die forreal and honestly i think she does know ABSOLUTELY everything there is to know about me. timmy too actually!

25: what's the weirdest place you've ever broken into?- hmm idk if it counts but this one "abandoned house" in the gables to smoke, and the rooftop of merrick park late at night

26: what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit?- bro i had these low top black and white converse that i got for christmas one year from this boy that rly liked me lmao i kept them for a hotttt minute, through college i think but had to throw them away when the sole finally gave out

27: what's your favorite bubblegum flavor?- just mint is fine

28: sunrise or sunset?- sunset

29: what's something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?- just how she remembers and notices absolutely everything. i moved a pin in my room once and after not having been over for a week she asked me where it was as soon as she walked in

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?- yeah last night when i was home alone and i swear i thought i heard knocks on my bedroom door which would be impossible. fuck no i didn't open it

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.- i think socks are cool, they make my feet soft if i put them on immediately after showering & moisturizing. they protect your heels from getting too cracked as well. i don't care for white socks, but am a slut for black no show ones. i sometimes have to buy kids socks bc my feet are so fucking small that no show, still show. i like aesthetic socks! like the ones w cartoons and stuff like that. and knee high socks can be sexy, just maybe not on me?

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.- i don't be w friends like that? OH but this one night we went to see Laidback Luke at Space and then we went to Nikki beach to drink some more and watch the sun rise and we all rly bonded and i learned some shit about my friends i def ain't know before it was rly nice. there was a dog we met there named molly LMFAO

33: what's your fave pastry?- i like lemon and red velvet stuff. guava and cheese pastries are good too i miss them

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?- okay i didn't rly have any stuffed animals as a kid, but that boy i was obsessed with, omar, he gave me a plush lil puppy one year for christmas and omg i cherished it lmao. but then my dog got it and i was so sad :(

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?- FUCK YEAH I DO. i use them often, though not as often as before like i need to get back on track w being organized

36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now?- arctic monkeys, always

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?- clean!!!! i finished cleaning it completely today and wow i feel like a brand new person

38: tell us about your pet peeves!- messes stress me outtttttt, like gross unhygienic messes omfg

39: what color do you wear the most?- black bitch, next

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you?- i have these 1/4 carat diamond earrings that i received as a christmas gift last year from one of my kids and it was just so sweet and i rly love them, they're the only earrings i wear now

41: what's the last book you remember really, really loving?- the zodiac series! and lord of shadows!

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!- no i don't, not yet at least. i would like to find a rly rly nice one, maybe we'll go hunting for one next weekend. there are two rly good boba places i like though!

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?- michelle maybe? and no gaze, we just noticed the starts were nice during that hurricane lmao

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?- july 8, 2017 it was short lived limited to just that day lmao but it was nice

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?- some times? my instincts don't be telling me a lot tbh

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.- "what did the cell say to his sister when she stepped on his foot? Mitosis"

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?- sea food? fucking pickles!! mustard too

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?- roaches, and possibly hell yeah

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?- i do! but i have apple music now so i do not buy music or anything any more

50: what's an odd thing you collect?- tickets. plane tickets, parking tickets, concert tickets, admission tickets, sometimes even receipts, if it has a nice enough memory attached to it i collect it

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?- nothing i can think of at the moment

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?- salt bae, all the "it" memes, the neo yokio memes, "i had to do it to em," x-files memes

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?- i'm familiar w rocky horror & the heathers, love beattle juice, haven't watched pulp fiction

54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?- myself whenever i look in the mirror

55: what's the most dramatic thing you've ever done to prove a point?- i don't rly be doing shit "just to prove a point" thats rly petty

56: what are some things you find endearing in people?- love when their faces light up talking about some shit that gets them hype

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?- i rly don't fucking care for bohemian rhapsody like why is that a thing

58: who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?- i am vodka aunt

59: what's your favorite myth?- I LOVE ALL GREEK MYTHOLOGY EQUALLY. norse mythology is cool too, as is celtic but i think greek is my fave

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?- poetry is hard to get into bc so much of it doesn't resonate w me or comes off as fake deep tumblr posts (i'm looking @ you milk and honey). howl by allen ginsberg is still my fave

61: what's the stupidest gift you've ever given? the stupidest one you've ever received?- i'm always surprised to be getting any gifts at all, i don't think i have ever received anything "stupid." my gf used to love giving me food and candy though but like i'm fat so no. and i don't give gifts without putting any thought into it so i have never given a "stupid" gift either.

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?- no, i drink ice cold water and coffee. sometimes crystal light which isn't rly juice to me i think its just flavored water

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?- nigga YES! i just reorganized my entire bookshelf and my itunes is not as neat bc i'm behind but i also keep that rly meticulously done

64: what color is the sky where you are right now?- blue-ish gray

65: is there anyone you haven't seen in a long time who you'd love to hang out with?- my gf, lmao. thuy!!!! nick and andres too omg!!

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?- not roses, it'd be an assortment of a ton of flowers, lots of pink and green and white

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?- i fucking THRIVE it's nice, scary movie and reading weather

68: what's winter like where you live?- it's FAKE AS HELL. i wish it just a tad cooler, like ten or fifteen degrees

69: what are your favorite board games?- i like scategories and the game of life. candyland!

70: have you ever used a ouija board?- those are caucasian activities no thank you

71: what's your favorite kind of tea?- great tea or tazo passion tea

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it?- HELL YEAH and i'll note it down multiple times like written, typed, phone agenda, etc it's hard and i hate my shit memory

73: what are some of your worst habits?- procrastination is the worst i think

75: tell us about your pets!- i don't have any :( i would count zeus but i'm also deathly allergic to him

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't?- yeah!!!!! smh

77: pink or yellow lemonade?- "why not both?" probably pink more

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?- hate that shit they're so ugly and annoying and gross and hate how they talk like bro

79: what's one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?- i never thought my mom cared about me tbh but she threw me a huge graduation/birthday party i cried.

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?- they're a nude/beige, i didn't pick it but i'm also not painting over. its nice though

81: describe one of your friend's eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.- this sounds nice in theory but i dont rly have the energy for it rn lol

82: are/were you good in school?- i was but i coasted, had i tried a lot harder and dedicated more time to it i could have been better

83: what's some of your favorite album art?-i can't think of any rly  

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?- i have to add to what i have on my back, and have a few more i would like but am not sure about

85: do you read comics? what are your faves?- i do! i'm actually reading one now on tumblr, its called countdown to countdown and its rather interesting. i like twd comics, and am also reading the OoT manga. i rly love manga too actually, inuyasha was the first one i read that got me into it

86: do you like concept albums? which ones?- BECAUSE THE INTERNET, CHILDISH GAMBINO

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?- i've seen a ton of movies dude. i think spirited away or kiki's delivery service, or princess mononoke. ghibli movies w strong female leads. howl's moving castle too but it does focus more on romance. i should reread the book

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?- i'm not familiar enough w art to tell you! i think art is rly interesting though, and don't particularly care for modern art

89: are you close to your parents?- not rly, but am more so as an adult. i don't tell them my business or anything like that though

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities.- seattle just really resonates w me and the more i talk about it the stupider it sounds. but i have been to quite a few cities, DC, atlanta, Tallahassee, miami, san diego, vegas, the list goes on. none of them made me feel the way seattle does. maybe bc i went alone? maybe the time period that i went? some of the memories attached to the city kind of suck now, lol, but still rly important to me

91: where do you plan on traveling this year?- nowhere in particular this year, but i'm def going back to seattle next year guaranteed, maybe doing paradiso

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?- if its my own sauce then no cheese at all, otherwise olive garden def hates me

93: what's the hairstyle you wear the most?- i just wash it and wear it down

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?- today is felisha's bday apparently

95: what are your plans for this weekend?- uh idk, ig see my gf. i'm avoiding a baby shower but idk what we'll do instead

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?- i procrastinate on them a ton lmfao "remind me later" yeah bitch in like a century

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?- INTP, gemini, ravenclaw

98: when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?- i don't think i ever have gone hiking

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.- i'm sure there are a few but nothing i can think of off the top of my head. reflection by 5h actually lol

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?- FIVE YEARS INTO THE PAST and five years ago is a rly good time to go back to!!! i was 20 and going through suchhhhh a bad break up but i wish i could have gotten up and been a bad bitch sooner lol i love the stuff i experienced that year, went to my first edc and whatnot. 2013 was rough on me but i pushed through it! 2014 i made some bad choices that i would change, 2015 wan alright but i can do it better and i'm not even sure what 2016 was. i would have started teaching sooner had i known it was something i could do i think. i would have worked harder and been more responsible especially financially, though tbh i did pretty well. i'd just do adulthood a lot better and start off a lot stronger. I WOULD REDO THAT LOCKHEED INTERVIEW AND ROCK THE SHIT OUT OF IT.

[wildgrave]

so i rarely use tumblr anymore but i feel obliged to keep y’all up to date... please my fanbase... so here is life updates: edition 3,001,922

classes start in two days and i am absolutely unprepared but i feel like anyone who is prepared is a filthy liar and also reads hemingway for fun, probably. so far i’ve spent $350 on my textbooks, one of which was just a piece of paper with an access code written on it (and i’m pretty sure my prof wrote the textbook which i feel makes it even more sadistic that it cost $140). my books for english lit haven’t been posted yet, but i’m guessing that’ll be aother $150 at LEAST. why is getting an education so expensive??? where are the “this is how bernie can still win” memes when u need them??

on the plus side, I MOVED INTO MY APARTMENT!!! i have already made many friends, 90% of whom are cockroaches that i have had to kill with my BARE HANDS (and also a paper towel). but i like to think that we have a kinship. they eat my food, and in return, i am forced to learn how to clean up after myself. also all of our walls are lined with borax which does not work but makes us look like we’ve watched too much supernatural and are trying to keep out demons.

my roommate is really chill. she loves early 2000s pop and fighting republicans on the internet and honestly, what more could i ask for?? she also makes a mean marg which doesn’t hurt (unless you count my liver, in which case it hurts a lot).

she also allowed me to do this to our living/dining/kitchen area:

and i’m super pumped about my bedroom as well!!! i need to take more pictures in order to properly portray the ~ambience~ but in the meantime these will have to suffice:

honestly i really have enjoyed living here though! it’s so WILD that i’m able to just walk out the door and do things that i wanna do. i can basically walk to everything i need to walk to, including school, and i can come and go as i please. and i can take NAPS when i want to. and i can go grocery shopping. and i feel like a bonafide adult!! i feel like it has been rly good for me to be independent because it’s kinda forcing me into learning how to exist and be a functioning human being.

i don’t have any WILD stories, mostly because i’ve only been here for 4 days, but don’t worry guys!!!! i will absolutely make atrocious decisions and they will likely occur very soon. i mean, i almost got stick n pokes with a girl after knowing her for half an hour, so it’s only a matter of time.

but really, even though i haven’t been wildin, i’ve had more fun in the past few days than the rest of summer combined. i feel so fulfilled. there are already people that i feel like i can be more genuine with here than people i’ve known for my whole life. i feel like i can start afresh -- i’m starting by working on wearing less makeup. i went out to dinner with some friends the other night completely barefaced!!! that was mostly bc the circumstances forced it, but still!!! v proud of myself

i’m also pleased b/c i can already tell i’m not gonna have a problem with managing freedom/too easy access to alcohol and such. i mean, my roommate and i are STOCKED. but since it’s SO easy to drink/smoke whenever i want, i don’t feel like i have to. i didn’t finish my beer and i stared at it for like ten minutes before realizing that i can have beer WHENEVER i want and don’t have to stay pressed about not wasting it/drinking anytime i have the chance. like... growing up in the suburbs, you CONSERVE that shit. mostly bc ppl are stingy and you ask for a shitty light beer and ppl are like “haha yeah venmo me $5 tho” like??? BOI...

anyway i was a lil worried that i’d start going wild but i’ve been home every night by 11pm, solely because i KNOW i can go out and party when i want to. i don’t have to seize every opportunity. ya girl can just turn in early and listen to the noise of drunk college kids absolutely screaming outside of the fast food place (which i live DIRECTLY above) until 4am. honestly, i’m already used to it...... it’s basically asmr

but stuff in general is good! i need to schedule meetings with potential therapists (which i have been putting off for literal months) and i have been a bit anxious at night, but that’s not incredibly abnormal for me. tmrw is my last day before school and i plan on spending it doing laundry and repotting my plants on our balcony. i am 100% prepared for life as a domestic single woman who is essentially married to her cacti.