#steve is a number

[morganbritton132]

Steve has the worst case of wrong time/wrong place and keeps getting unknowingly filmed in public and posted online.

Sometimes he accidentally wanders into the background of someone’s shot. Sometimes someone tries to stop him to ask him questions for one of those street interviews. Sometimes someone is a creepy weirdo and just filming him without permission.

Steve’s notable and noticeable because he’s hot and kinda a weirdo. Robin is a number one Steve defender though so she’s always in the comments warding off creeps.

Her favorite example of this was when a girl posted a video complaining that people were so unfriendly nowadays. Her example is that she sees this guy at the park all the time and she always says hi to him, and he always ignores her.

She demonstrates this by flipping the camera around to Steve on his morning run. He goes past her, she says hi, and Steve doesn’t acknowledge her.

She complains that he’s not cute enough to be ignoring people trying to be nice.

Robin simply commented, ‘He’s deaf 🫶’

[sunsickjune]

“i felt that five had to have a love story” okay steve !! fine. i’ll humour you. picture this : lila and five in the subway. they’re travelling to different timelines, loosing hope, trying to find a way home. then they get to a timeline and five sees dolores. but she’s a human, not a mannequin. he falls for her. loves her. wants to stay with her in her timeline. and that’s why lila has to force him to come home. she has kids, a husband, a life. five wants to stay with dolores more than anything. but he goes home, back to his timeline, because he knows he has to save his family. because he loves them more.

[twobraincells-art]

The 8th of August, 2024

Two mistakes of the universe go for a walk. Despite this, the universe doesn’t chew them up and spit them out. It lets them be. They deserve it, after all.

It’s a lovely day.

[golden-redhead]

You see, the biggest problem with this is that Five HAD a love story all along.

His love for his family has been THE very foundation of the show and what kickstarted the entire chain of events.

He spent 45 years in the apocalyptic wasteland because he loved them too much to give up.

He found them in every possible timeline.

He reversed time for them.

He became an assassin to get a shot, however small, at coming back to them.

He’s been through countless timelines, doing his best to save and protect them in every single one of them.

No matter how dire the situation, he always pushed to find a way to save his family. His devotion was stronger than anything and there was no line he wouldn’t cross for his siblings. No matter how self-destructive the cost, he sacrificed himself again and again just for a chance at reuniting with them and saving the world so they could live.

It was a destructive kind of love, yes, but also inspiring. I think it resonated with many people because love can be intense, we love and want to be loved with this kind of intensity and dedication.

So, to throw it all away for a romantic subplot that no one asked for is not only a huge disservice to Five’s character but also goes against everything he represents. We already knew he’s capable of love and that he loves deeply.

I don’t understand how the showrunner who worked on the series for 5+ years can say that Five had to have an arc like this. It doesn’t make sense. He already had a love story. Arguably, the most beautiful and deepest of them all. He didn’t need more, what he needed was to have it returned and to finally settle down after multiple lifetimes of putting his life on the line to keep his loved ones safe.

To say otherwise means that the writers fundamentally misunderstood what made Five a great character and what fans loved most about the show. It feels like a betrayal, because it is one. It proves that the creators not only misunderstood the core character of the show but also never paid attention to the fandom and its preferences.

There’s a difference between catering to the audience and what they ended up doing, which is a character assassination at its worst. And it’s not just the character who was ruined but also the entire premise of the show, the reason why fans loved it in the first place. There’s no coming back from something like this.

[capsicle107]

money can't buy no friend of mine, and money can't buy me back no time (x)

[piratefishmama]

Eddie and Robin taking Steve as their 'token golden retriever straight friend' to a queer bar in indy only it has a rodeo bull and subsequently Steve ends up going home with literally almost every single phone number in that place cause

"I got an uncle with a ranch over in Texas, didnt I tell you that Robbie?"

[fantastic-nonsense]

Steve Orlando, after writing half of Supergirl Rebirth and fixing Wonder Woman after Robinson's run, in the middle of writing Donna Troy's nth origin story retelling: "bro she saw her planet blown up as a teenager and then got to Earth and her baby cousin was older than her now. it's not hard, go read some of her stories and figure it out"

[tartarusknight]

Based on this tik tok

Famous Eddie AU, where he's known for going out into the crowds during performances. It has led to a few security risks and freaks out his manager, Chrissy. So, when they get to the next venue, Chrissy goes up to the security crew and tells them about Eddie and that nothing but brute force would stop Eddie. Because Eddie always says that he needs to be in the heart of it to show that he loves his fans as much as they love him.

The venue manager, Robin, tells them they have it covered because she has a secret weapon. That secret weapon is Steve, who dresses up like he's just a fan, but everyone knows his face well enough that they will see him and know better than stop him from saving Eddie.

The only thing they don't take into account is Eddie in between two songs, singling him out. "We alright?" Eddie asks, and Steve freezes before dumbly nodding. The people around him are staring. "You're good?" Eddie asks again, a growing smile on his face. He tilts his head all cutely, and Steve forces himself to stay formal with another nod. "You're like an important security guy, though," Eddie says, looking at the other security man whose shirt obviously says staff. Unlike Steve's own plain outfit.

"What's going on? You're like CIA in the middle of the whole crowd." The crowd laughs, and Steve can feel his face heat. "You sent him out there undercover! This is weird!" Eddie cackles, looking towards the other staff member who is now trying to keep it all under control.

"So are you coming out or are you staying?" Eddie asks, and he crouches down by the edge of the stage.

Steve raises an eyebrow. "Are you coming out?"

Eddie sighs with a shrug, "I am going to come out into the crowd at some point in this song." He admits, and Steve can't help but grin as the crowd erupts into cheers. "And that's why you're there?" Eddie asks and laughs slightly as he says, "You're doing too much." The other members of Corroded Coffin are laughing now. "I'll be careful, I promise," Eddie says, like he can control the entire crowd.

He cocks his hip as Eddie goes on, "who's going to beat me up when I come out there." The crowd cheers, and they all raise their hands. Steve's sure it's a joke, but it has him straightening up despite that. Soon enough, Eddie's giving the crowd instructions along with Steve to part and make a pathway towards Steve when Eddie starts making his way into the crowd during the song. It puts Steve on edge to go far from the stage, but he lets himself be corralled into it by the fans.

Eddie grins at Steve, "And I want you to stay right where I put you. And I'm gonna point right at you, and you're gonna be my security. But you're not gonna be man, cause you're gonna go fucking hard with me for that whole rest of the song, okay?" Eddie smiles, a dimple showing, and Steve just dumbly nods.

The band starts up and Eddie rocks around the stage. Steve watches him with rapt attention, his own fondness for the band's sound growing. Until Eddie points at him and walks off the stage into the crowd. Steve jerks forwards but stops when the crowd actually parts. Eddie appears easily in Steve's view and the singer's finger points him out.

He begins to wave Steve forward and Steve's hesitant. Hesitant enough that Eddie, during a small break of lyrics, grins at Steve, "Come to me papa." Someone in the crowd shoves Steve forwards and he moves towards the singer who dances over to him. Fans are reaching out to brush Eddie as he passes, but no one is grabbing and pulling.

And suddenly Eddie's there, and he's pulling Steve to dance with him. Steve wants to shake it off and tell him his job is literally just to protect him, but Eddie's smile is wide, and Steve can't help it. He bounces along, following Eddie's lead in the middle of the crowd. Eddie's hand grazes his chest and Steve knows Robin is going to give him so much shit, but he doesn't care. How can he when Eddie's focus is on him, and he's just dancing the crowd dancing with them?

Then the song slows ,and Eddie reaches out, running a hand on Steve's cheek. The crowd roars and Steve takes a step back but Eddie gently, not forcefully stops him. "Don't go anywhere." He says and Steve nods on instinct. Eddie's grin brightens, "Catch me," he orders and Steve tenses up.

"Wait-"

But Eddie's singing, looking back at his band. The song begins to pick speed back up. Then the drums are clashing and it hit a crescendo. Eddie's arms shoot up, and he looks at Steve before running and jumping towards him. Steve stumbles slight but manages to hold onto him. Lifting him up above the crowd. Eddie laughs and squirms until Steve places him down.

He's even pretty up close, and Eddie moves to place a kiss on Steve's lips before he's dancing back towards the stage as the next song starts up. The roar of the crowd makes Steve wish he was deaf, and he knows his face is bright red. As Eddie gets to the stage and lifts himself to sit on the edge, he looks right back to Steve and does the phone motion with his hand that has fans shaking Steve in excitement like they are happy for him.

[lovelylittlegrim]

I really love the idea of a supportive Wayne Munson buying books and zines on bisexuality to give to Eddie. And Eddie who mistakenly thinks that Wayne is trying to come out to him when all Wayne was trying to do was show Eddie that it’s okay to like girls and guys and that maybeee Eddie’s friendship with Steve Harrington isn’t as platonic as the two young men think.

So now Wayne’s just accepting a big hug from a supportive Eddie. And listening to Eddie tell him how proud he is for coming out and asking if Wayne has found someone and if maybe that’s why he’s decided to tell Eddie now and Wayne is just flummoxed on what he’s supposed to do now.

“Now wait just a minute,” Wayne is trying to say.

“Dont even worry about it,” Eddie claps him on the shoulders. “We’ll have you a boyfriend in no time.”

Eddie does take the books though because he wants to be “the best ally” for Wayne.

(Eddie Bursts into Wayne’s room like a week later all wide eyed and frantic, holding one of the books and is just like ‘is being gay hereditary?’ Because holy shit Eddie’s pretty sure he’s bisexual too and half in love with Steve Harrington)

[hungharrington]

hi, gorgeous. currently daydreaming about steve’s innocent, shy girl climbing on top of him while he’s in a chair and she’s ready to ride him but his huge hands settle on her hips to stop her and she’s looking at him all confused and ready to do her part but he just says “just sit here and look pretty for me,” before he begins to absolutely pound into her, one hand on her hips and the other holding her jaw to make her look at him. he’s just praising the hell out of his little angel baby for taking him so good because he’s just so big. the mental image of his furrowed brows and clenched jaw as he watches her completely melt on his lap from pleasure has me clutching my peARLS

– sittin’ pretty

U KNOW WHAT!! UR THE DEVIL! THE DEVIL!! anyways this request had me feral the moment i started writing it… it gets a little soft at the end tho fem!reader, light choking, hella praise kink, what the request says basically <3 and around 1.7k MDNI this entire blog is 18+

It’s hard to press down your shyness as you tug the tight elastic of your underwear down your calves. They pool at your ankles. You step out of them and resist the urge to cave in and cover yourself. 

“C���mon, c’mere sweet girl,” Steve says softly, his hands smoothing over the top of his tan hairy thighs. He pats them to urge you over. 

Everything feels a bit stilted as you tiptoe over to the big comfy armchair he’s seated on, with his thighs parted. You can feel a surge of slick between your thighs at the sight of his aching cock, the head all pink and drippy just for you. It lies back against his happy trail, the vein on the side prominent. 

Steve offers you his hand, palm up. You take it and let your knees gently find either side of his hips, hovering hesitantly above him. Heat swirls between you, mixing with the fog of lust that emanates heavily from Steve. His adoring face gazes up at you, but his are eyes dark in a way that makes your tummy twist up. 

“Hi, pretty.” He murmurs, guiding your face down for a kiss. You sigh into it sweetly, hands gripping his shoulders. 

“Hi.” You whisper back, against his lips. His kiss and reverent gaze give you courage, leaning back to plant one hand on his knee. Your other hand reaches between your two bodies and curls around his throbbing cock. It’s warm and hard, twitching at the sudden stimulation. Steve hisses lowly, his tummy flexing as pleasure jolts through him. 

Even though you’re shy, that doesn’t mean you’re not impatient. Today, there will be no working him up til he’s begging to be inside you, no matter how much you desperately want to. Instead, you waste no time, tilting your hips forward to let the head of his cock catch against your entrance in a way that makes you moan. Your thighs ache a little with the slow pace you lower yourself — but Steve’s cock is always a stretch. 

It stings, just the slightest, but enough to make you revel in it. You sink down, hand shifting forward to hold his hip to prop yourself up, and your eyes flutter shut in pure ecstasy as his hard cock stretches you open— unaware of how Steve fights to keep his eyes open, drinking in every minuscule expression on your face. 

“That’s it, honey,” He coos, sweeping his hand up your hip to tug you down an inch more. You mewl, body shuddering as you clench around him. It feels fucking mind-melting how good he feels filling you up. “That’sssss it.” 

You’re whimpering by the time he’s fully hilted in you, your thighs pressed down against his own. Steve’s panting a bit, hairy chest rising and falling as he struggles to keep himself in control. You’re so wet, so warm, and god, you’re still so shy even when you’re sitting on his cock — averting your eyes even as your tight little hole clenches around him. When did he get so lucky?

Try as you might, there’s not stopping the pitiful gasp that comes out when you lift yourself back up, his cock gliding almost all the way out of your cunt. You can feel the mess you’re already making on him, can already feel the subtle ache in your thighs but none of it deviates you from your plan. You’re going to ride your boyfriend like there’s no fucking tomorrow. 

But right as you prep yourself to sink back down, Steve’s hands stop you, shooting out to grab you by the hips. You pause. Shyness creeps back in. 

“Wha…? Is something wrong?” You ask. 

Steve’s quick to comfort, one of his hands reaching up to cup your cheek. “Hey, hey, everything’s fine. I just—“ He shift his hips up a bit and you shiver, eyes fluttering closed without thinking. When you open them again, he’s grinning. 

“I just want you to sit here and look pretty for me, hm?” He leans up to kiss your cheek and it makes you entirely too distracted for what happens. 

His tummy clenches, muscles tightening, as his hips suddenly snap up, thrusting his cock back deep into you. You squeal. 

“Steve!” Your hands propel forward, grasping his shoulders, but he doesn’t pause. His hands on your hips tighten as he holds you in place, drilling up into your wet cunt, hard and fast. Pleasure dribbles through your core, hot and melty. His thighs slap against your own, causing them to buckle and you sink down a little lower — only forcing his cock deeper inside you. 

You whine, all of a sudden overwhelmed, and tuck your face away— all too aware of how every time he fucks up into you, you make a needy little uh. 

And, well, that just won’t do. With one hand keeping your hips secure, his other wanders up, creeping in around your neck. Even as he fucks you roughly, his touch is still gentle. His big hands can stretch across the expanse of your jaw— and he uses it to coax your head up. You’re already looking teary eyed, warm enough in the face that he can feel it with his hand, all from how much you’re enjoying it. Steve loves it. 

“Baby,” He manages to rasp out sweetly. You gasp, hiccupy and high pitched, embarrassed by the wet squelchy noises he’s fucking out of your cunt. “Look at you, my baby. Doing so good for me, huh? Taking it so well, angel.” 

You lean into the hand around your throat further, letting him curl his fingers around it a bit tighter. One of your hands flies up to grasp his wrist, needing, craving the connection. 

“Steve,” you cry, delirious from the pleasure. His cock fills you over and over, unravelling you from the inside. “Steve,” You repeat his name uselessly, mouth hanging open as a whiney moan takes over. 

“I know, I know.” He coos, sweet as he can be while ruining you on his cock. He’s got a furrow in his brow, his jaw set, perfect brown eyes searching your face— always looking for which button to press next, which way to make it better for you. God, you love him. 

“So fucking good, isn’t it angel?” He grunts. “Perfect fuckin’ cunt, just made to take my cock, isn’t she?” 

“Yes!” you keen, the words tearing from your mouth. “Yes, yes, yes, fuck,” Pathetic whimpery noises flow out freely, your grip around his wrist tightening as you feel heat gather low in your tummy. 

“G-God, fuck,” Steve groans, the first hint of desperation leaking into his words. His hand around your throat tightens in the slightest, a soft pressure that has your head spinning. “Can fucking feel you getting close.” 

His words make you moan, your thighs slipping further down — your hand shoots out to brace against the arm of the chair, desperate to keep him going, to reach your peak. 

“Your—“ A whimper slips into his voice. “Fuck. Your pussy gets all tight when she wants to cum— y’wanna cum?” 

You’re nodding along before he’s even finished his sentence. With how hard he’s fucking you, hips thrusting up against yours, it’s a wonder he can even see it. You whimper out a “Yes.” just in case. 

“I know you do.” He groans loudly. “Deserve to, too. You’ve been so good, so fucking good, yeah?” 

His hand holding your hip slips forward, snaking towards your clit and pleasure twists the coil in your tummy up tighter and tighter. His rough thumb pushes against it, sloppy but effective. You wail. 

“Y’deserve to cream all over my cock like a good girl, don’t you?” He rasps, throat a bit wrecked from every sweet sultry noise thats passes his lips. 

You’re not even sure if it’s words coming out your mouth anymore, just a whiney mess of yes’s tangled up in your moans. Steve whines, the rhythm of his strokes beginning to falter as his own orgasm begins to rear up. You whine and your hips move on their own accord— bouncing down on his cock to meet his thrusts midway. 

“Yes, yes, fuck, you’re so good, y’look fucking perfect bouncing on my cock,” Steve rambles, that perfect pussy-drunk expression beginning to take over him. His moans turn to whines and with one desperate whimper of your name, you topple like a house of cards. 

Pleasure unravels you. Your hips stutter and drop down, trying to cram every inch of Steve into you as you can, while your other hand claws weakly at his tummy. Heat scorches every nerve inside you, delicious and overwhelming all at once. 

The scratch of your nails, the clench of your wet cunt, the pitiful crying noise you make, all of it sets Steve off — his back arching and hips bucking up, trying to get more of your hot, wet pussy. His face screws up, a high whine tearing out his throat as his hands grapple to circle around your back, trying to get you closer.

It’s a sweat press of skin, chest to chest. You twitch and moan, face tucked away safely in his neck, as Steve lets all his noises out into the curve of your own. It’s deeply intimate — enough to make your shyness peek back up when Steve digs his face out after a minute of laboured breathing. His face is pink, his expression blissful. 

“You,” He huffs tiredly, eyes scanning your face worriedly. “You okay? Wasn’t too rough?” 

You melt a bit, a breathy laugh escaping you. “Yeah, I’m okay.” You chuckle. Nerves rear their ugly head within you before you can flatten them. “Was I— that was good?” You check. 

Steve laughs softly, nuzzling in closer to you. He smells fantastic. You can’t help how you mirror him, nosing along his cheek, letting your eyes slip shut. 

“Baby, I think you melted my brain.” He says, pressing a kiss to your cheek. 

[morganbritton132]

AU where Eddie is a drug dealer going to pick up his next shipment when he notices a guy tied to a chair in the back. The guy gives him a little smile. He’s got blood in his teeth.

Eddie’s told not to worry about it and he’s not dumb enough to argue so he gets his shipment and gets the hell out of there.

He’s in his van and five miles away when he has the holy hell scared out of him by someone climbing into the passenger seat from the back like, “Hey, thanks for - stop screaming. Thanks for the ride. I’m Steve.”

It’s the guy that was tied to the chair so - so - “How the hell did you get out of that chair?!”

Steve holds up his hand. His knuckles are bruised, his half his fingernails actively bleeding, and yeah. The clearly dislocated thumb.

With his good hand (still bleeding but not dislocated), he pops the tab on one of the beers Eddie had in the back and takes a drink. He gives Eddie a look and then says, “Don’t be dramatic about it, okay?”

“Dramatic about wh- oh god,” Eddie swore at the sickening noise of Steve relocating his thumb. He slams on the breaks because, “No. Nope. You’ve got to get out. Now. Go.”

“No way, man,” Steve says, way too fucking casual for this conversation. “We’re in this together. You’re my accomplice.”

“No, I’m not. I don’t even know you.”

“I’m Steve,” Hw introduces again. “You think they’re going to care about the semantics, Mr Getaway-Driver? I don’t think they will.”

Eddie swore again.

He started driving and some time went by before he asks, “What did you do to piss off a bunch of drug dealers?”

“Drug dealers?” Steve snorts. “Those guys were not drug dealers.”

[laurrelise]

thirteen year-old five desperately shaking a dead diego to try and wake him up and then sitting in the rubble and staring at his corpse will never not bring me to disgusting, ugly, rocking-back-and-forth-on-the-floor-sobbing tears

^ gif credits to capinejghafa

[twobraincells-art]

Brisket Five would have beat the crap out of S4 Five (and Steve Blackman <3)

[hawkinsbnbg]

Steve: So the D.

Robin: Mhm.

Steve: I think I lo– I like him.

Robin: Yeah?

Steve:

Robin:

Steve: Ok, Jesus! I love him! Satisfied?

Robin: Plenty.

Robin: So the D.

Steve: Mhm.

Robin: Why him? He's a possum.

Steve: Well. He's funny.

Robin: And has a big D.

Steve: Yeah. That too.

Robin: Steven Catherine—

Steve: Hey, that's my aunt!

Robin: —Harrington. I raised you better!

Steve: I raised myself! Thank you very much.

Robin: Does he know?

Steve: He just gave me flowers yesterday.

Robin: What did he say?

Steve: He asked if I'm free today.

Robin: Ohhh, you're blushing. Did he finally ask you out, Rapunzel? Do you think he's the one?

Steve: Shut it. This is only our first date. There's nothing certain about it yet.

Robin: Right. How long has you been pregnant?

Steve: What? What are you talking about? I'm not pregnant!

Robin:

Steve: Fine! Three months.

Robin: I knew it!

[hello-sweetheart]

You know that trope where Person A thinks Person B is just being nice but they’re actually flirting. What about the opposite? Person A misreading their behavior and being the only one falling impossibly in love.

Clumsy in Love part 1

Eddie really is just that nice and friendly, but Steve is convinced that Eddie is flirting with him. He’s flirting back, less confident and more subtle than he usually would, but he’s never liked a guy that way.

Not in a way that made him really want to spend every waking moment just hearing them ramble. Not in way that made Steve want to keep him the way he wants to keep Eddie. Everything is so new. It feels, delicate. Precious.

His heartbeat quickens each time Eddie leans into his space and it’s been happening all the time now that Steve worries he’ll develop a heart condition if he doesn’t deal with it soon. When Eddie laughs and leans his face closer to his own, looks into Steve’s eyes through those lashes in a way that Steve can’t help but take a quick glance at those lips curled is mischief.

He’s always so happy to see Steve, wasting no time in bouncing his way to greet him and pull him into the conversation with an arm slung around his shoulder. Then there’s the moments of shared glances when someone says something particularly astounding. And how Eddie will make his way into Steve’s space when they sit together, throwing his feet in his lap or leaning into his side.

Sure, Eddie is friendly but not to this extent. Not with everyone else. Steve feels it. Knows it. That electricity between them that makes this thing between them different. Special.

But one day (another that Steve spends trying to work up the courage to do something), they’re in the city shopping for music in an alternative store that’s tucked away. Steve is talking to Eddie, giddy and happy because it just them today, and Eddie is nodding along while he browses through the tapes and then,

Eddie looks up and stills, eyes widening just a bit. And Steve is still rambling along, but he can tell his words are just going through one ear and out the other. He trails of caught in the middle of his story because he’s never seen this look on Eddie face.

Eddie’s mouth is slightly agape, eyes alight caught in wonder and soft as he looks at something across the room and when Steve turns to see what caught his eye—

A guy stands a couple tables away looking at some vinyl and shyly smiling at Eddie in small glances. He’s a bit taller than them, dressed in black with a couple of piercings decorating his face, the sides of his head shaved short. Attractive, dementor coy and kind.

His heart skips a beat again, but it feels different this time.

Steve looks back at Eddie whose cheeks are slightly dusted in pink.

“Eddie-“

Eddie takes his lower lip between his teeth before smiling back at the guy and continuing without casting a second glance at Steve, “yeah, uh, give me a second, okay?” And he’s crossing the room without waiting for a response.

His chest. It feels…

Like those few seconds before plummeting down a rollercoaster… when your way up high, at the very top, the moment still with the anticipation of the fall, and there’s nowhere else to look but down.

You finally plummet and caught in the whiplash thinking you must have left your heart back at the top.

There’s static there on the bottoms of his feet and at the palm of his hands. The world goes a bit distant as he watches them.

Eddie’s leaning against the wall with a sultry smile adorning whatever sweet words he’s speaking.

Steve’s drowning in the honey, it’s palpable. doesn’t know if it’s better or worse that he can’t hear the words.

Eddie’s fiddling with a curl that’s draped over his shoulder, pulling it slightly over his face like a young school girl.

Steve doesn’t think he’s ever seen Eddie appear anything but confident and loud; the image of the person in front of him is foreign, strange.

Eddie’s speaking to him but his eyes are locked on the guy’s lips that are wet from the tongue that peaks to briefly lick them as he listens.

Eddie’s shoe is nudging the guys own, as he talks, playful.

Oh.

Oh.

Mouth dry, Steve’s throat clicks.

It’s hard to swallow.

Part 2

[stevieschrodinger]

Part One of Rock Star Eddie and Baker Steve wrong number AU

Link to Part Two

Eddie's got dubious history with picture messages. Only a very small group of people have his number, considering he's the front man of a multimillion best selling metal band, he doesn't ever want his number to be public knowledge.

So yeah, picture message from and unknown number? Dubious.

Eddie's had enough dick and...vag...pics in his time that he, honestly, doesn't really want another. But when the picture is followed by a message, "were you thinking something like this?"

Well, Eddie's a curious guy. So, committing himself to the idea that this might be new number time, again, he opens the message.

To be confronted with a cake. A really fucking cool cake actually, it's got a car dashing around a muddy track on top with a big '5' in the middle. All of it looks edible, made out of...cake stuff. Eddie has no idea what it is, but it looks delicious.

"One layer chocolate, one layer red velvet? I can do any combination of flavours you want."

Well. Eddie isn't anything but impulsive and he was trying to figure out what the fuck to do for the 'quiet' celebration they were planning for going platinum. Again.

"I think you have the wrong number'" Eddie types, "but I definitely want to order a cake from you."

"Oh my god I'm so sorry, unsolicited cake pics are the worst 😉"

And Eddie can't help it, he laughs, and types back, "if I told you I wanted three tiers of the darkest, spookiest, cherry chocolate what would you come up with?"

It takes a couple of minutes, but Eddie's phone pings twice in quick succession, the first picture is of a spooky orange cake clearly Halloween themed, covered in ghosts and skeletons and stuff. The second is jet black and has a coffin on top that looks like it's leaking green corrosive stuff and Eddie nearly throws his phone in excitement. "That! The second one!"

"🤣 that's an old pic, I was just starting out then, but everything is edible, the green slime is made out of jello"

"Where are you based and can you make it for the 15th? I'll get a courier to collect."

"Sure thing, how many portions? And I need a deposit up front. I'll do chocolate ganache and cherry filling."

"Errr...like, 150? Maybe?"

Eddie sits and watches as the dots appear and disappear, appear and disappear, and then there's a pic.

It's a selfie of the most beautiful man he's ever seen. And he's standing in a kitchen, holding a cake pan. Suddenly Eddie's phone is ringing in his hand and he is panicking because beautiful man is calling him. "Hello?"

"Hey, man, it's Steve, the cake guy?". Eddie assumes he makes an affirmative noise because Steve keeps talking, "anyway, that cake pan I'm holding is literally the largest one I own, even if I did three tiers, no way will it cater that many, I'm a small business, you know, it's just me. I can recommend you some companies I know would do a great job."

But then, Eddie will never get to talk to beautiful man ever again, "what if you made like, three cakes?". He asks desperately.

There's a long beat of silence on the phone, "I mean, in theory, I mean, it might cost you more than-"

"I'll pay it. I'll pay double, for, inconvenience, or whatever-"

And oh no, beautiful man has the most beautiful laugh too. Eddie's fucked. He's so fucked.

"I'll raise you, two cakes and fifty muffins?" Steve laughs again, and Eddie laughs right along with him.

Steve grabs his phone when it pings, hoping for Eddie. It is Eddie. It's a selfie from the neck down, like always, Steve still doesn't know what the guy looks like, but Eddie's wearing a deep red shirt that he's clearly just dumped a whole cup of coffee down, "hope your days going better than mine, sweetheart,"

Steve sends back a selfie with a lump of uncooperative modelling fondant in the background, "that depends, can you tell what this is supposed to be?"

Steve's pretty sure it's wierd to talk to a customer every day, but he's started to find he's looking forward to Eddie's messages. Even when they turn flirty. Especially when they turn flirty, maybe.

And maybe it's not exactly professional that Steve's found a lot of reasons to call Eddie. He just, needs to get this right, and if Eddie wants chocolate covered cherries on the cupcakes, well, Steve needs to call him and check, right? Right.

Steve heads out into the lounge with flour on his nose and a mixing bowl under his arm, Dustin, Lucas and Max are sprawled on the couch, El lying on the floor. He can hear Mike and Will fucking around outside. He spoons up some cherry mixture, "hey will you try-"

"Shhhhhhhh!"

Well. Rude. Steve looks to the interview they're watching on the TV. It's some metal band Steve vaguely recognises, and when the lead guy speaks...Steve has to sit down. Because that sounds a lot like-

"So, Eddie," the show host guy starts, and Steve's knees would go weak of he wasn't already sitting down. He's certain his stomach has left the building. "Seeing anyone?"

Eddie laughs, says no, but the band mate next to him makes a show of nudging Eddie and sharing a look.

The host picks up on it immediately, "so there is someone," Eddie's still shaking his head, but he's got a shy smile on his face that makes Steve feel like he's melting. "Come on Eddie, give us something."

"It's not a thing," Eddie flaps his hands, "don't make it a thing."

"Oh it's a thing alright," the audience laugh, "come on, give us something!"

Eddie looks uncomfortable for a second before shrugging, "they, uhm, they make the most amazing cakes you've ever seen."