#start rambling/

[pain-suffering-even]

various headcanons that i forgot aren't actually canon

just the koreans cause if i did everyone at once, we would be here forever

Jongin and Yoonho were both part of the Fiend Guild, and that's where their rivalry started, by competing for vice guildmaster

Jongin rescued a cat from Jeju during their first raid and smuggled her back in his cape. Her name is Kiwi. He had to get a new cape because she uses his old one to sleep

Byungyu and Yoonho are childhood friends. Byungyu would always defend Yoonho, because he was so much of a softie and a crybaby as a kid

Yoonho has like. A bajillion animals at home. At some point when he's walking his dogs during a hot summer, he goes topless, and the picture reaches the papers so fast. It gets brought up in almost every single argument with Jongin

Taegyu will eat sour candy until his mouth bleeds and it sends Byungyu insane

Eunseok was an S rank assassin part of the Fame Guild, and was best friends with Byungyu and Haein

Haein was first vice of the Fame Guild before Jongin created the Hunter's Guild and stole her (he promised her no paperwork if she joined, and she was sold)

Hwang Dongsu used to be part of the Knights Guild. He joined, thinking as an S ranker he would immediately become the guild leader. When that didn't happen, he began searching overseas, where Thomas Andre ran into him and picked him up

Byungyu felt too guilty to dedicate himself to one guild, and so he freelances for a high price, so this way he can help more people instead of being tied down. It made it easier to retire, too. The running joke is that he wants to join the Hunters Association

Taegyu and Dongwook had a healthy rivalry between the Fiend and Fame guild. They don't know where Jongin and Yoonho learned to be rivals like that

The Fiend Guild used to be no. 1 until Jongin rose to the top by recruiting Haein and gathering a lot of attention by being a guild leader as a mage

Taegyu and Jongin still talk often. Jongin always makes fun of Taegyu for being ancient and forgotten and Taegyu calls him an arrogant brat. They would die for one another

Just before he became no. 1, Jongin had a really bad fight with Hwang Dongsu. It wasn't unusual, because most other S rankers despise him, since he was blatantly power hungry and bloodthirsty. Because Jongin lost, he ended up leaving Taegyu and the Fiend Guild and created his own guild in an attempt to prove his strength

Jongin despises Yoonho for hiring Hwang Dongsu's brother, Dongsuk, because he still holds a grudge

Jinchul doesn't like Taegyu very much, because he kept trying to bribe him to join the Fiend Guild. They're ok now, especially now that the Fiend Guild isn't no. 1, but Jinchul avoids Taegyu still

Go Gunhee used to pretend actually entertaining the idea of letting Jinchul join a guild until Jinchul told him it was causing problems on his end (Thomas got sad Gunhee said no and Jinchul was terrified that sadness would turn to anger)

During the holidays, Yoonho always takes his dogs and one cat back home with him. Byungyu also goes, so it's become a sort of yearly roadtrip for them. Yoonho usually asks Taegyu or Haein to pet-sit the rest of his animals while he's away

Haein likes fast food restaurants. Neither Jongin nor Dongwook understand why, but she drags them there all the same

Jinchul appreciates Byungyu and Haein, since they always mediate Yoonho and Jongin whenever he isn't around to stop them. It doesn't always work, but at least they tried

Haein doesn't know Jinchul is the origin for her nickname, The Dancer, because he was creating her hunter profile and was mesmerized by the way she fought. He mentioned it to Go Gunhee, and it kinda spiraled from there

[antennatoheaven]

[lazylittledragon]

can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024

[secondbeatsongs]

somehow instead of saying "as a treat", I've started using the phrase "for morale", as if my body is a ship and its crew, and I (the captain) have to keep us in high spirits, lest we suffer a mutiny in the coming days.

and so I will eat this small block of fancy cheese, for morale. I will take a break and drink some tea, for morale. I will pick up that weird bug, for morale.

I'm not sure if it helps, but it does entertain me

[12u3ie]

I just went on a rant about plungers, how’s your day going?

[liimonadas]

randomly rememebered a very silly maya content creator AU i came up with like 2 years ago. its just dumb fun haha

[calmlb]

“Chuuya wasn’t in Dark Era, why is he in this art??”

wdym, he’s right here 🤨

[gingermintpepper]

I think, perhaps one of the funniest things to come from EPIC popularising the Odyssey is that now a ton of people think Poseidon wanted to kill Odysseus.

In the Odyssey, Poseidon has no intention of killing Odysseus. In fact, part of the whole reason Zeus lets Poseidon do whatever he wants even though he thinks Odysseus is rad and should get to kiss his wife is explicitly because Poseidon had no intentions of killing Odysseus. Poseidon wanted to pay back the suffering/inconvenience blinding Polyphemus would have caused. It's a really abstract thing tbh. How do you pay back someone permanently disabling your son? Poseidon's solution was just to amputate Odysseus from his other half; i.e. Penelope. The end game was never murder, it was always an endurance race.

(Od. Book 1: Zeus reassuring Athena that he is not, in fact, a part of Odysseus Hater-Nation. Trans. Robert Fagles)

Also, for those wondering if there's any sort of in text reason for why Poseidon wasn't around in God Games - at the time in the Odyssey when Athena petitions Zeus to let Odysseus leave Calypso's island, Poseidon was -checks notes- on vacation in Ethiopia. Yep. He left to Ethiopia for a festival and thusly was very much absent for Athena's whole "please let Ody go? Please? 🥺" request.

(Od. Book 1: While Odysseus was suffering, Poseidon went to party in the east)

I am begging y'all to read the Odyssey. It's a comedy for everyone except Odysseus and Penelope who are, in fact, suffering 24/7 365.

[tojisun]

thinking about oral cockwarming price underneath his desk.

garrick and mactavish had interrupted him as he tries finishing his paperwork to ask if perhaps he would have known where you went but john just says he doesn’t and that they should scram because laswell wants those papers sent to her as soon as possible. meanwhile, you are on your knees before him, hidden under his heavy oak desk. you have your head leaning on the robust press of his thigh, your eyes going heavy as drowsiness fills you up.

then, the door opens again. with how close you are to your captain, you hear his grumbled annoyance before he addresses who it was—“ghost. what brings you here?”

simon doesn’t reply for a moment and you are back to tuning everything out except for the weight and size of john’s cock and how it twitches every time you swallow, when—

“yer hiding the rookie, aren’t you, sir? right there, under yer table.”

his tone is light, pleased and amused, but the knowledge that you’ve been caught. that a higher-up—hell, not just anyone but ghost, knows what you’re up to—

…well, fuck.

[humming-fly]

Every now and then I'm reminded Real People with Actual Jobs use tumblr and I've always been legitimately curious what all you weird adults are up to when you're not on this site and with tumblr's New Poll Feature I can finally get an answer! (or the closest approximation of an answer possible with only 10 available options h a)

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

Being someone who read Under The Red Hood and came out with the firm belief that, for Jason, it's not about killing Joker, it's about Jason wanting proof Batman would choose him over the Joker (bc shelia chose the joker). Makes seeing any other media where it's all about just wanting the Joker dead is a teeny bit frustrating. to be honest

Jason could've killed the Joker himself, really, really easily. Jason kidnaps the Joker before the confrontation. I can't open my comic for a reference right now, but it felt like he had the Joker for quite a bit before the confrontation. He had him. He beat him up with a crowbar. He had every single opportunity to kill the Joker himself, but he didn't because that wasn't his goal. Make no mistake, he did plan for the Joker to be dead by the end of it, but do you see what im trying to say here

Edit: If I knew this post was gonna get 1000+ notes I would've tried to word it better or something, this was a rant I made on the way to the grocery store 😭

It's not about making Batman kill either. When Batman says he won't kill, Jason adjusts and goes, 'Let ME kill the Joker or kill me to stop me' instead. The test is all about Batman choosing him. The whole final confrontation is Jason's first death again. The parent, The Joker, and the explosives. It even ends with Jason unable to move as a bomb goes off right next to him again because the parent didn't choose Jason. And instead tried finding an option that'd benefit them and (consequencely) letting the Joker walk, again, lol, lmao <-in agony

[pain-suffering-even]

various headcanons that i forgot aren't actually canon pt. 3

the draw sword guild team, who definitely aren't my favorites

Firstly, I don't know why, but I made the jump of headcanon-ing Hoshino Minoru as Goto Ryuji's nephew. This isn't canon but I refer to it a lot, so I just wanted to clarify straight away this is not part of the manhwa!

Reiji had a really long lasting emo phase. It kept going even when he was a hunter, and only stopped when he was promoted to vice guild leader. But he still has tattoos and piercings from back then, and it drives the team wild (they figure out he has his tits pierced and he never knows peace)

Tatsumi was in university to become an engineer. He tends to do random things whenever he gets bored. As in, dismantling the communal kitchen dishwasher and trying to "upgrade it to maximum efficiency," or taking apart various devices to try and "create a homemade roomba," and so on

Ryuji's lockscreen is an old, fat cat, and his homescreen is that same cat with kittens, and a rather excited young child. This has sparked rumors within the team that he has a kid (the kid is a very young Hoshino Minoru, his nephew)

One of Tatsumi's better hobbies is the trumpet, much to everyone's dismay. However, they realize Minoru is a heavy sleeper when Tatsumi attempts to play the Megalovania theme and Minoru just. Sleeps entirely through it

Kanae was going to be a tattoo designer/artist (I think being a tattoo artist requires a medical degree in Japan... but she would not care) and she still doodles designs in her spare time

Kanae also wants to have every inch of her tattooed, as a goal of hers, so she takes suggestions from the team (Kenzo and Tatsumi aren't allowed to suggest anything because they keep advising onigiri)

When Reiji created the team, he first hired Kenzo, Kanae, and Tatsumi. A tank and two fighters. He hires Mari, a ranger, and Akari, a healer after Tatsumi nearly dies doing stupid shit in the gates

Mari was a sheltered rich kid. The team takes it upon themselves to educate him on the wonders of 60 cent ramen packets (and other things as well)

When Akari moves in with her pet bugs, Kanae goes back to trying convince Reiji to allow her to have a pet python. Reiji doesn't budge, and for her birthday, Kenzo, Tatsumi, and Minoru all band together to sneak a python to her room (it goes about as well as you'd imagine, which isn't well at all)

Kenzo is terrified of bugs. At some point, Akari's millipede escapes. This is where their little rivalry begins

Ryuji doesn't really interact with the team a whole lot (at first), doesn't even attend the trainings. He's moved out of the offered room that comes with being a Draw Sword Guild leader. The kids are a little disappointed, because they've heard a lot about the Goto Ryuji, and barely get to see him outside of dungeons or gates

At some point, the Annual Guild Conference is held in Las Vegas. The entire team begs to go, because it's Las Vegas, and Reiji relents. Even Ryuji goes

Ippei and Mari are tied for being the shortest two on the team. Kenzo uses their heads as elbow rests a lot

Everyone tends to distance themselves from Atsushi a lot, since his fighting style is... dangerous. Kenzo is the only one who is really friendly with him, since he's so confident that he's stronger than Atsushi, so he can't ever kill him

Ippei is prone to insomnia, so it becomes a thing to just. Walk into his dorm room to bother him if you're up at 4 am, because he's most likely up as well

Kei isn't an insomniac, but they are a night owl, so they tend to run into Ippei in the communal kitchen a lot, and they become really good friends when they start playing Minecraft together

Akari discovers Ippei's old streamer videos. Even though he deletes them immediately, it's too late. She's clipped several videos of him getting jumpscared, or rage quitting, or doing something stupid, etc. They become reaction images in their groupchat

Tatsumi challenges him to speed-running Minecraft and loses terribly, but now they know Ippei didn't fake his speed-running videos. Tatsumi always challenges him at least once a month

Reiji urges Ryuji to participate in the team, which prompts Ryuji to choose Atsushi, Kei, and Ippei as potential hunters. Reiji recruits them immediately, but Ryuji still doesn't interact with the team much, to Reiji's disappointment

Ippei accidentally microwaves a fork one time in the morning after not getting any sleep. His expression did not change a single bit as the microwave caught on fire. "Oh no," has become an expression throughout the group

Atsushi, like Yoonho, is capable of shifting powers. He turns into a brown bear, but it's a really unstable shift. He's working on controlling it

(I chose bear because I think Kuma = bear in Japanese, so little brown bear boy!!! He's not little hes like 7 feet tall but you know what I mean)

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

i know i’m the one who keeps making jokes about Lucanis being financially savvy and wealthy but you have to understand. he is also IN TOUCH with reality. you can’t make the “One banana? How much could it cost, 10 gold?” joke about him because HE IS THE ONE DOING THE GROCERY SHOPPING. that joke is for rich people who have no clue how everyone else lives. If Illario asked Lucanis how expensive bananas could possibly be, Lucanis would say "well if you want the best bananas imported from Par Vollen those are quite pricy these days because of the blockades, but you can still get ones grown in Rivain more reasonably[1]”. But, crucially, he would still buy the expensive fancy bananas anyway because he knows Emmrich likes them[2] and he wants the team to eat well. And that’s what makes him mr fantasy heartthrob in addition to being a pathetic wet beast of a man[3]

[1] The World of Thedas has a surprising amount of banana lore [2] Groceries codex in DAV [3] My heart tells me this is true

[ash-and-starlight]

Reposting a couple of old arts from my twitter era bc the GORJUST SHOWSTOPPING spiritual twin soul fic “My world gets slower” by @kyoshialone is now Real and on ao3!! cancel all your evening plans rn and go read it!!

[pastabaguette]

look guys i don’t like to argue but i hate it when people portray equius and nepeta like this:

i mean, they’re both just thirteen, come on.

equius is not her parental figure, and nepeta isn’t a fussy baby that can’t eat her fruits and veggies! equius isn’t some malicious evil guy, he’s just a stupid little teenager. that goes for eridan too (and i guess like, all of the trolls, but especially those two). nepeta’s not some innocent little baby. she’s the same age as all her friends. she kills huge wild beasts on the regular for consumption.

a lot of dubs i’ve seen, too, make nepeta sound like a toddler, and equius like a whole grown adult man, and i don’t really like it because neither of them are those things. (granted, i don’t watch too many dubs, so maybe i am wrong on this)

[plushiebi]

the more time i spend w my friends and their kids the more i realize i am not a toddler but i believe in their beliefs