#st and childhood

[conflictofthemind]

I can’t sleep because I just have so many thoughts rolling around in my head. The more and more stuff we get about S5 the closer I can get to being able to ‘predict’ where they’re going with it, not with hard facts about plots and locations but the thematic aspects as well.

The way children and childhood seem to be highly symbolic for this last season is very juicy. The random children in the mansion. The Derek kid at the farm. The supposed leak about Robin with all of those kids. The disappearance of Holly Wheeler. The rest of the kids in the Creel House / Playground scenes. The kids on the military school bus. The multiple flashbacks to our characters as their younger selves. Taking inspiration from children’s novels such as a Wrinkle in Time.

I said before I think this show is actually presenting lots of commentary on childhood nostalgia, meanwhile almost the entire media and general audience dismisses it for being un-self aware. But it’s very aware.

[mahoganyrust]

Happy Birthday Jack!

Did I draw this on unhealthy levels of caffeine? Yes. Do I regret it? It’s 3am so maybe but it doesn’t matter BECAUSE IT’S JACK FROST’S BIRTHDAYYYYYYYYY

[asoftepiloguemylove]

SPEND ALL THE EVENINGS YOU CAN WITH THE PEOPLE WHO RAISED YOU / 'CAUSE ALL THE TIMES THEY WILL CHANGE // ON NOSTALGIA, GROWING UP, AND MOVING ON

Lorde Stoned at the Nail Salon // Djo End of Beginning // Katatsumori (1994) dir. Naomi Kawase (via @octoberdead) // @lettingitlinger1 // Taylor Swift Never Grow Up // 怪物 Monster (2023) dir. Hirokazu Kore-eda // Sam Haft You Will Be Okay (Simon's Lullaby) // Keaton St. James A LIST FOR NIGHTDREAMERS // @chloeinletters // Sylvia Plath Witch Burning from "The Collected Poems" // Aftersun (2022) dir. Charlotte Wells // Lorde Stoned at the Nail Salon // Banana Yoshimoto Kitchen // Moonlight (2016) dir. Barry Jenkins // John Green Looking for Alaska // 방탄소년단 BTS EPILOGUE : YOUNG FOREVER // Stephen Chbosky The Perks of Being a Wallflower // 火垂るの墓 Grave of the Fireflies dir. Isao Takahata

[da-owo]

thank you to everyone who gave requests for this ! honestly was so star struck by who ever requested shadowbent ive been meanin to draw him for a while now haha

[the-case-book-of-fanfiction]

The Only Tally Mark

Ship: Steve Harrington x reader

Summary: The 'You Suck' tallies are getting pretty high, but there's a girl in Scoops Ahoy who knows Robin in wrong. If she can just get the courage to open her mouth, Steve's luck is about to change.

Word Count: 7,250 words

Warnings: Robin's a bit mean, she also has no filter, pining, Steve's failed flirting attempts, blatant staring/pining, implied confession, first kiss

Note: Set pre-s4 and the day Dustin comes back, before the Russian code is cracked.

☟ Continue below the fold ☟

July had only just begun in Hawkins, and you could already tell it was going to be a hot one. Less than twenty-four hours in, temperatures had already hit record-breaking highs—at least, that was according to the weatherman on the television you were sat in front of, sweating and feeling relief from the heat only when the fan beside you swiveled back toward you.

“Every July is this hot,” your father said from the kitchen, where he was drinking his second glass of water in five minutes.

“Oh, sure, but never this early,” your mother retorted. “It’s only the first, and already we’re melting out of the house.”

Sensing an irritable argument birthed from the nearly unbearable heat, you left the living room and headed up the stairs to your bedroom. You picked up the phone you’d begged your parents to let you have years ago, dialing the number of your best friend of four years: Robin Buckley, the band dweeb to your theatre kid.

It was her mom who answered the phone, several dial tones later. “Hello?”

“Hi, Mrs. Buckley—is Robin home?”

“Oh, hi, sweetie! She’s at work right now, her shift ends at seven.”

You stopped yourself from swearing. “Oh, right, I forgot. Thank you!”

“No problem, dear,” Mrs. Buckley said before hanging up.

You leaned against the wall. How could you have forgotten? Robin had been telling you about her new job in the mall—and the sailor’s uniform she had to wear. You’d seen her get ready for work once and had burst into giggles the moment she put the hat on her head.

You glanced at the digital clock next to your bed, checking the time. There was still several hours before the mall closed. You might as well visit Robin and abuse your friendship to get some free ice cream at the same time, right?

So you grabbed your wallet and shoved it in your pocket and bounded down the stairs.

"Hey, I'm going out!" you shouted to your parents.

"Where do you think you're going, young lady?" your father asked, appearing in the doorway between the living room and the kitchen.

"To the mall? Robin works there and I'm going to visit."

"Don't spend too much, dear!" your mother called.

"Sure, Mom!"

You hopped in your car and headed for the mall, following the thick cluster of traffic that always lined the streets leading to the mall, passing through the streets lined with empty, hollow shops.

~❊~

The mall was crowded, as busy as it had always been since the day it opened. You pushed your way through the crowds gathered around storefronts and display windows, trying to remember which floor Scoops Ahoy was on.

You took the escalator down to the first floor and scanned the shops surrounding you. When you spotted the sign for the ice cream store, you headed toward it, maneuvering past a group of pre-teens cackling about manipulating the store's workers into giving them free samples.

There was no one at the counter when you walked in. A majority of the tables were occupied by groups of teens. As you approached the register, you could hear faint bickering from behind the pebbled glass windows, Robin's distinct voice floating out to you.

"...do the job you're supposed to do, I've been scooping so much ice cream my hand's cramped," she was saying.

You stifled a giggle and tapped your hand lightly against the bell in front of you, wincing when it was a little louder than you had been expecting.

The swing door on the left opened with a bang, revealing the back of a boy who was gesturing at Robin, who was quite literally pushing him out the door. She disappeared before you could catch her attention, and the other attendant took up his place in front of the register.

"Ahoy, sailor! Would you like to set sail on this ocean of flavor with me? I'll be your captain, I'm Steve Harrington."

You blinked at him. "Is that company policy like the hat and the outfit?"

He stared at you. "I'm sorry, what?"

You shrugged. "I'm a friend of Robin's, she complains about the, and I quote, stupid company rules that make everyone look stupid."

He stared at you. You stared at him. Awkward silence settled between the two of you.

The introduction hadn't been necessary. You had spent most of your high school experience listening to Robin complain about Steve Harrington and his stupid perfect hair and his stupid easy charm and his stupid actual stupidity. The Steve she'd painted matched up perfectly with the kid you'd seen around in the halls, dressed in his ironed polo shirts and pleated khakis or that stupid basketball uniform and letterman jacket—and Nancy Wheeler on his arm.

You and Robin had watched his life crash and burn with malicious glee—and all the while you had tried to ignore that this was the very same boy you'd crushed on in middle school, and had been so shocked to find out had changed so much when you got to the high school, a year after he did.

Steve cleared his throat, his gaze dropping to the register, firmly away from you. "Um. What can I get you?"

"Uh..." Every ice cream flavor you had ever liked instantly disappeared from your head. It wasn't like the usual mind-blankness that came from being asked a question about your favorite anything. It was like your entire body had stopped, freezing in the pretty face of Steve Harrington, ridiculous as the uniform was. Especially with the hat, which Robin hadn't told you about.

The door swung open again. "Jesus, Steve, what's taking you so damn long?" Robin froze where she stood. A smile lit up her face. "What are you doing here?!"

You grinned. "Visiting!"

Robin hip-checked Steve out of the way. Steve glared at her while she grabbed the ice cream scoop from the pocket at his side.

"Jesus, do you have to be so brutal?" he snapped.

Clearly fighting the urge to roll her eyes, Robin turned back to Steve. "I'm sorry, would you please get out of the way so I can serve my best friend? Thanks," she said, her customer service smile plastered to her face.

Muttering under his breath, Steve pushed away from the counter, leaning on the sill of the window behind him. He crossed his arms, still staring resolutely at the floor.

Robin grinned at you. "I wasn't expecting you to—"

"Be here?" you finished. "I called your house before I realized you were working, so I thought I might as well come visit."

"Glad you did," she said. "You would not believe how much of a headache it is working with dingus over there."

You glanced over her shoulder at Steve, his pink lips forming a pissy pout. Oh, yeah. Still pretty, still a bitch.

"You didn't tell me you worked with him," you said under your breath.

Robin shrugged, shooting you a knowing smile. "Yeah, well, I knew you'd show up and find out for yourself eventually." Her eyes slid to the corners, as if she could see Steve sulking behind her. "We'll talk about him later. What ice cream do you want? On us."

You giggled. "How did I know you'd say that?"

She snorted. "Oh, so you're abusing our friendship for free ice cream?"

"Maybe," you said. "Just this once."

Robin rolled her eyes and grabbed an ice cream cone. "Here—I'll grab your favorite."

And, without you needing to remind her, she lowered the scoop into the tub of ice cream that you got every time the two of you had gotten ice cream after going to see a movie, back before the mall. You wondered how you could have forgotten, until you looked over Robin's shoulder again and found Steve looking up, lips parted and eyes fixed on you. The minute you caught his gaze, he blushed and looked away.

You took advantage of his embarrassment, admiring the pink in his cheeks and how he awkwardly licked his lips. He toyed with the watch on his wrist, crossed and uncrossed his legs. Was he nervous? An even better question—had you ever seen Steve Harrington nervous before?

While you studied Steve, Robin made a second cone of ice cream, a different flavor than yours.

Robin looked behind her. "Hey—man the counter, will you? I'm going on break."

Steve spluttered. "You just came back from break!"

"No, we just finished our lunch break. I still have my federally-required thirty minutes to take. So I'm gonna take 'em." She shoved the scoop at Steve's chest and stepped out from behind the counter.

The pair of you took an unoccupied table near the counter, in case she was needed.

"Should you be leaving him to do it by himself?" you asked, glancing back at Steve one last time.

"What, are you worried about him? He'll be fine," Robin said. She shrugged with a sigh. "He's...he's not as bad as we thought he was in high school. He's less of a douche now, at least."

"Just a dingus?" you asked with a smile.

She nodded. "He's still as stupid as we always thought."

You turned your attention away from Steve at toward your ice cream. "Why didn't you tell me he worked with you?"

She rolled her eyes. "Let's not have that conversation while he's here, okay? For your dignity's sake. I know he's far away, but he's got impressive hearing." She shrugged. "Blame it on four years of listening for gossip, I guess."

Your gaze shifted back to Steve as he raked a hand through his hair, stretching enough for his shirt to lift. Heat rushed to your cheeks and you crossed your legs. Now that he wasn't surrounded by assholes who mocked you and Robin and your friends for their own personal entertainment, it was easier to appreciate how he'd grown into himself since middle school. Taking care of himself had made him a whole new level of handsome.

Robin giggled. "Yeah—that's why we're not gonna talk about this while he's around. You still have a thing for him, don't you?"

Steve relaxed against the countertop, fixing his hair and putting the hat back on with a scowl. You cleared your throat.

"I was hoping you'd forgotten about that."

"Me? Forget about you having the most embarrassing crush on him for years? Only to get to high school and find out he'd become a dick? Never."

You groaned. "Oh, stop rubbing it in!"

A gaggle of girls walked into the store, four of them giggling and talking and rolling their eyes. Immediately, Steve stood up a little straighter and fiddled with his uniform.

Robin snorted. "Oh, watch this. He's been failing catastrophically with every girl that walks in. I keep count."

"You keep count?"

She nodded gleeful, pointing with her chin in the direction of the counter.

"Ahoy, ladies!" Steve said, leaning on the counter. His attempt to be attractive failed dismally, however, when his hand slipped off the side and he lost both his balance and his composure for a moment.

One of the girls giggled with her friend. Steve's cheeks darkened.

"I'm Steve Harrington, I'll be your captain on this ocean of flavor. What can I get you lovely ladies today?"

You glanced at Robin. "I don't see what he's doing wrong."

"That's because this is scripted," Robin whispered back.

The first girl stepped forward. "One scoop of chocolate and one of vanilla, please."

Steve tried a debonaire smile. "Oooh, classic, I like it. I'm all for vanilla myself, you know, all the time."

You winced. "Was...was that supposed to be a double entendre?"

"Yep," Robin said, popping the p with a smirk.

"I see what you mean now," you said. The girl was making a face that said she caught Steve's drift and found it rude. Steve cleared his throat and moved on, scooping ice cream into a cone and handing it to her with a mortified whisper of "here you go." His gaze flicked over to you and Robin, at which point his mortification seemed to grow.

You watched the exchange grow steadily worse. Steve stumbled over his words and tripped over his feet and dropped an empty cone twice. Customers who had already gotten ice cream became onlookers who left, one by one, as the secondhand embarrassment grew.

"God, he's hopeless," you whispered. "Whatever happened to the Steve in high school?"

"You mean the one with a new girl on his arm every week? I'd say that stopping can be blamed on one Nancy Wheeler," Robin said.

You rolled your eyes. "While they were dating, obviously. But now? One relationship shouldn't make him incapable of flirting with a girl."

Robin watched the girls leave, snickering behind their hands. A moment later, Steve groaned, wiping a hand over his face. "You know what I think his problem is?"

"What?"

"He's trying to flirt all of them into submission, not just one girl he likes out of the group."

You nodded slowly. "Sounds about right. I mean...if he flirted with me one minute and then you the next, I don't think I'd want to jump his bones, exactly."

Robin rolled her eyes. "What are you talking about? You've always wanted to jump his bones."

"That was middle school, and that was before any of us gave a shit about sex."

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that," Robin teased. "I saw how you looked at him during gym class."

You shrugged, trying to hide your face behind your hair. Robin knew your expressions better than anyone; your embarrassment was going to be obvious the minute she caught sight of you. "It's gym class! Guys don't wear shirts ninety percent of the time, they practically invite girls to stare." Your gaze slid back to Steve, who was once again staring at the floor. His cheeks were still red, and that pretty mouth of his had once again formed a pout. "Jesus, I don't think I've ever seen him so...despondent."

"He's like that at least five times a shift," Robin said. She played with a small red plastic spoon she had pulled from her pocket. "You know... You could come work here with us. Then you'd get to see Steve every day."

"Robin, you're constantly complaining about how much you hate working your, and I quote, pitiful minimum wage job."

"Yeah, but you like Steve, and eye candy makes the day go by faster."

You swatted her arm discreetly. "Don't objectify him!"

She rolled her eyes. "Hey, Steve!"

Steve looked up so quickly you swore you heard his neck crack, even with some distance between your table and the counter. "What?"

"Come convince her to work with us!"

You glared at her. "Robin, I already have a summer job!" you protested, trying to stop your heart from racing as Steve approached the two of you. You looked anywhere but him, knowing a soft smile and a well-timed flutter of his eyelashes was all it would take for Steve to convince you to do anything he asked.

Steve pulled a chair from the other table for two next to you, spinning it unnecessarily in his hand and dragging it to the edge of your table. He straddled it, leaning his arms against the backrest. Your heart climbed into your throat.

Steve's eyes met yours and every thought melted from your brain. Brown had never been such a pretty color. Although his eyes weren't just brown, they were hazel, mottled with soft greens and blues and greys. You'd never seen such beautiful eyes before, so expressive and kind and interested and attentive and—

"Tell her why she should come work with us," Robin said, breaking your focus on Steve's eyes.

You rolled your eyes. "Robin, I already have a job," you repeated. "A job I like that pays well that I can work at year-round."

Steve snorted, shaking his head absentmindedly. "Then don't come here, that's for sure. The pay is shit, the job is just as bad, and nobody likes ice cream in the winter."

Robin glared at him. "What part of convincing her do you not understand?"

Steve shrugged, ignoring her. "But, then again, you'd get to work with Robin and you might alleviate my boredom from dealing with her all the time." He jerked his head toward Robin. "You wouldn't believe how mean to me she is."

You stifled a giggle as Robin huffed. An easy grin reminiscent of the king he once as slid across Steve's face. You felt slightly giddy, knowing you had been the one to put it there.

More people walked into the store and Robin shot to her feet. "Come on, dingus. We have a job to do." She dragged him to his feet, ignoring his hiss of complaint. He shot you an apologetic shrug as she pulled him behind the register again.

While the two of them got back to work, you sat back in your booth table and finished your ice cream. Once you were done, you discreetly snuck out of the store, leaving a note for Robin at the counter promising to call her after her shift.

As you wrote the note and taped it to the register, you failed to notice Steve pause where he was scooping ice cream to watch you, or that his gaze stayed on you until you left the store and Robin had to snap him out of his reverie.

~❊~

Though it seemed utterly impossible, the next day was even hotter than the last. You lasted all of two hours at the community pool before you got tired of the screaming children and moms flirting with Billy Hargrove and you went home.

You changed out of your bathing suit, dressing more consciously than you had since the eighth grade semi-formal. You selected your jewelry carefully before hopping in your car and heading to the mall for a second time that week.

Scoops Ahoy was significantly less busy when you walked in. Robin looked half-asleep where she stood at the counter, but she brightened when you walked in.

"You just couldn't stay away, could you?" she asked, leaning on the counter with a grin.

You shrugged. "It's hot, ice cream is a solution."

She studied you for a moment. "The pool didn't solve that?"

You scoffed. "Hell no. It's full of tiny children and middle-aged moms and girls who only go so they can take up space and stare at Billy."

"And there's no Steve there, is there?" Robin teased.

You rolled your eyes. "No," you admitted. "Or you."

Robin scooped your ice cream and passed it to you over the countertop. "He'll be back soon, his break ends in a minute. He went to go grab us food."

"He what?"

Robin shrugged. "Yeah, he does that a lot. I hate to say it, but he's actually a nice guy. I think we might have been wrong about him."

You grinned. "So I was right back in middle school! I told you."

Robin rolled her eyes. "Yeah, you did." She cleared her throat. "Behind you."

You heard Steve's footsteps approaching a split second before he said, "Hey, you're back! Applying?"

Turning to face him, you snorted. "Absolutely not. I'm here for ice cream and ice cream alone."

Steve frowned. "What are we, chopped liver?" he asked, gesturing between himself and Robin.

"I'm surprised you know that phrase," Robin said.

Steve made a face. "I do know some things, Robin." He turned back to you. "I told you she's mean to me."

You laughed. "She's mean to everyone sometimes, it's nothing personal."

"Yes it is, dingus," Robin said, and you remembered she had plenty of reasons aside from Steve's years mocking her and her friends to be angry with him.

You just shrugged at him when Steve looked at you for guidance. He copied your shrug and passed Robin a plastic bag that smelled heavenly.

"If I'd known you were coming to visit, I would have gotten you something," Steve said apologetically.

"Oh, it's fine," you promised. "I've got ice cream." He smiled at you, his laughter shining through. "Honestly, I'm surprised you two don't exist off of ice cream."

"We used to," Robin said.

Steve nodded. "It got pretty tiring after a week. It's like when they told us in health class that energy from sugar doesn't last very long. Or something like that."

Robin squinted at him. "You can't remember enough of high school to get to college, but you can remember health class?"

"I remembered enough to graduate," Steve mumbled, cheeks turning pink once again. You were starting to get used to Steve's embarrassment. It was as cute as he always was.

"Stay and eat with us," Robin said, turning back to you. "I'll split my fries with you. You did remember the fries, didn't you, dingus?"

"Of course I remembered the fries," Steve snorted. He dropped the Closed for lunch! sign on the counter and held the swinging door open for you. You thanked him as you walked by, aware of his eyes following you.

You sat in the seat Robin pulled out for you and finished your ice cream before stealing some of the previously offered fries.

"I think we're closing early, Robin," Steve said, glancing out the cracked window. "We've had, what, three people all day?"

"Four if you count the Radio Shack employee across the way," Robin said. "But I don't, because they get it for free."

You frowned. "Do I not count as a customer because you give me ice cream for free?"

Steve shook his head a bit too quickly. "No, you count, Robin just doesn't like the Radio Shack employees."

"Because they're rude," she complained. "They complain about everything and change their minds three times—but always after you've already started scooping, and even when you're done, they don't like it!"

"Sounds like a regular day in customer service," you said, feigning cheerfulness.

"Yeah, a shitty day," Robin said.

"Where do you work?" Steve asked. "I don't think I've ever asked."

"The record store down on Main," you said.

"You know, the one I said I had been planning on working at," Robin said. "But Scoops hired faster."

"Maybe we should switch jobs," Steve muttered.

Robin snorted. "Yeah, like that'll go over well."

"The store won't hire more people, anyway," you cut in. "It got rid of most of the staff, especially the new people, to cut costs because of the mall."

"Is there a record store in here?" Steve asked.

"No, but there is a Sam Goody and a Camelot Music in the mall. We used to have a partnership with the Sam Goody on Main, but then it closed due to the mall, and we started losing business to the one in the mall." You sighed. "I hear about it all the time. It's all the owner ever talks about these days."

Steve munched on a fry, staring at you as you spoke. His eyes were stuck firmly on you. You tried not to squirm under his intense gaze.

Robin leaned back in her chair. "One of these days, I'm gonna visit you at work instead."

You rolled your eyes. "If you ever have a day off," you said.

"Kinda hard to have a day off when we're the only two working here," Steve said.

You nodded. "The constant problem of being short staffed."

"That would be solved if you just came and worked here," Robin muttered into her wrap. You rolled your eyes again, stealing another one of her fries.

"No, Robin."

Robin harrumphed and took a bite of her sandwich more viciously than twas strictly required.

Steve faked a pout. "You just really don't like us, do you?"

"She doesn't," Robin agreed, smirking. You knew that smirk; she was going to do her best to guilt trip you—using Steve, which was perhaps the only way to guilt you into doing what she wanted.

You rolled your eyes. "It's got nothing to do with you, I promise."

"Ouch," they said in unison.

You frowned. "What are you, the same person?"

They both shrugged.

"Alright, that's just weird," you sighed. You glanced down at your watch. "How long does your lunch break last?"

"Thirty minutes. Why?" Steve asked.

You shrugged. "Wouldn't want you to get fired because I'm here distracting you."

Steve propped his head up on his hand. Stray curls of hair fell into his face. Your heart twisted in your chest. He was beautiful. How could he be so beautiful?

Robin watched as you and Steve stared at each other. You were aware of her gaze bouncing back and forth between the two of you, observing the way you were melting under his gaze, your lips parting the longer he looked at you, the barriers you'd put up slowly crumbling. Steve was no better, staring at you with open, asking eyes. He moistened his lower lip with his tongue and it took everything in you not to whimper.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw the look on Robin's face—the look of disgust that crossed her face every time she was disgusted by public affection from straight couples. Your heart did flips at the sight of her expression.

"Would you guys stop that?" she groaned, getting up from her seat.

"Doing what?" Steve asked, still looking at you. You tore your eyes away from him and back to the half-empty container of fries.

"Making eyes at each other," she said. Steve spluttered, instantly losing the lovey look in his eyes.

"Making eyes— Robin, what are you talking about?"

You cleared your throat. "Hey, um, what's the board for?" You hoped your question would steer the conversation away from the feeling bubbling in your chest at the sight of Steve.

Steve groaned, hiding his face in his hands.

"I told you I was keeping score of Steve's failing dating life. This is my scoreboard."

You nearly choked. "You keep track of it on a whiteboard at work?!" You looked at the neatly drawn board, the 'You Rule' and 'You Suck' columns divided by a line.

"Actually, I have to put the one from yesterday on here."

Steve groaned again, cheeks burning very red. He looked like he wanted to crawl under the table and stay there.

You watched her add a line. "Robin..."

"She's right, I suck," Steve sighed. "My luck's been pretty shit recently."

"You don't suck, she's just being mean," you said. You sent her a look, shaking your head slightly. She just shrugged.

"You don't have to be nice about it," he said. "I know how bad I am at this. I haven't gotten laid in months."

"Okay, too much information, Steve," you said with a little laugh.

"Oh, so this suddenly isn't a safe place to talk about all our life troubles?" he teased.

You laughed fully. He smiled, and the room seemed to light up with the glow emanating from him.

"Get a room," Robin groaned.

Steve turned around. "I'm not flirting, Robin!"

"Yeah, right," Robin smirked. "It's just working this time."

You coughed. "I, um, I have to go."

They both turned back to you, as if they'd forgotten that you were even there.

"Shit, hang on," Steve started, but Robin cut him off.

"No, wait, I didn't mean it like that—" Robin said, realizing she'd practically told Steve you liked him.

"Yeah, right, I know, I just have, uh..." You fumbled for an excuse for a minute. "I have to go drive a friend home! I'll call you later, Robs!" You rushed out the swinging door just as the bell at the counter rang.

Steve pushed his hands through his hair. "Shit."

"Oh, no," Robin whispered. "Steve, ignore that, ignore all of that, I screwed up, I shouldn't have said anything, she's going to be so pissed. It's just that she's liked you since middle school and it's gotten worse now that you're not a douchebag—" Robin clapped a hand over her mouth.

"I won't tell her you said that," Steve said quietly. "Oh, Jesus, Robin..."

"I'm sorry—"

"Stop apologizing to me," Steve said. "If you hadn't said anything, I never would have realized."

Robin made a face. "See, that's why you suck, not because you're bad at flirting with girls. You've just been flirting with the wrong ones, because you're oblivious of the ones that actually like you."

Steve was quiet for a moment. "Yeah. Thanks for pointing that out." He peered out the window, watching you leave the mall, wiping at your eyes and pushing your hair out of your eyes.

Simultaneously, Steve and Robin whispered, "Shit."

At the counter, Erica Sinclair tapped the bell again. "Hello? I want some samples!"

They shouted, "Shut up!"

Steve slammed the glass doors shut.

~❊~

Steve unlocked his front door, stepped inside his house, and put his back to the closed door. He slid down the door with a heavy sigh.

"Jesus Christ," he muttered under his breath. All he had been able to see since you left Scoops was your stricken face, horrified and embarrassed that Robin had spilled your biggest secret. (Which Robin had told him after, in bits and pieces, while they closed up the store.)

Steve couldn't believe it. How had he never noticed? Granted, he hadn't been the most observant for, well, the majority of his life. And his middle school years had been fairly dull, unmemorable. But wouldn't have noticed if you—you, out of everyone in Hawkins Middle—had been crushing on him?

To his utter shame, the most Steve remembered of you in middle school was how you had been a good friend to him, long before any of his high school friends knew who he was, and that he'd ditched you once he got to high school. You'd helped him study a few times, too. He wasn't sure what year it was, but he knew you'd helped him pass both English and History in the same year.

He'd shared a handful of classes with you, too, when classes had been so small they'd mixed grades. Sixth grade science, when the two of you had worked on a minor chemical project together. In seventh grade, you'd had two classes together. Gym, which had been downright brutal so early in the morning, especially when the teachers split up the teams as boys against girls. He remembered you had gotten nailed in the head with a basketball once, and that he'd been asked by your teacher to take you to the nurse. Then there had been math class, where he'd sat behind you, asking you questions and begging you to explain the concepts he didn't understand—even though you didn't understand it much more than he did. Eighth grade history, where Steve had done a presentation on his grandfather's experience in the World War, and you had been the only to actually raise your hand to ask a question.

Steve got up from the door and went up to his bathroom, stripping out of his uniform to take a shower. While the water soaked his hair and skin, warming him up, Steve's mind turned back to you—not that it had ever really left you.

You had been his first crush. Well, his first real crush. You'd been pretty, even when you were young and curious and a year younger than he was. Most of his friends had said that the younger girls were cute, but embarrassing to like. So Steve hid that he liked you. It wasn't until Nancy in high school, when it became cool, that he dated anyone younger than himself.

He wished he'd said something to you then. Would it have saved him a world of hurt? Or would it just have been an even worse broken heart waiting for him?

Steve recalled the way you had looked at him earlier, your eyes practically sparkling and your lips stretching into a gorgeous, content smile. It had stopped his heart to know that he was the reason you looked so happy, that he had brought that smile to your lips and that he had made those smile lines around your eyes appear and that he had been the reason your pupils were blown wide.

Steve shut off the shower and pulled on a new pair of boxers, flopping onto his bed with a content sigh, which matched the happy smile on his face.

You liked him.

Feeling like a teenage girl, Steve rolled until he could hide an excited squeal in his pillow.

You liked him again.

Steve was certain that's what made him so giddy. You'd liked him before he'd become King Steve, before the popularity made him interesting—and you liked him again, now that he'd changed and learned and grown up. Now that he'd learned to be himself without a care in the world for anyone else's opinion.

It was like redemption, but it felt so much better than that.

A sudden feeling overwhelmed Steve.

The next time he saw you, he needed to tell you how he felt about you. He needed to make it clear that Robin's slip-up had not ruined the slow banter, the friendship the two of you had been dancing around.

Resolved, his thoughts stopped spinning. He turned off the lamp on his nightstand and shut his eyes.

Please come back tomorrow, he thought, before falling into a gentle sleep, full of dreams of romanticized meetings, confessions, and kisses.

~❊~

You avoided Scoops for several days, choosing to tough out the warm weather in the overcrowded community pool until your mortification subsided. Robin had called repeatedly to assure you Steve wasn't weirded out or annoyed or embarrassed by your crush on him. In fact, she almost made it sound as if he was pleased by it.

But you still couldn't make yourself go to Scoops Ahoy. Even the mental image of walking in and seeing Steve's face twist with some kind of disgust made your stomach twist.

But a girl could only take so much of Billy Hargrove. So, after nearly a week, you drove to the mall instead of the pool. It still took you nearly ten minutes to force yourself out of your car.

You had thought seeing Steve and Robin in their sailor uniforms had been strange, but there was a far stranger sight directly ahead of you: Robin at the counter, staring in absolute confusion, and Steve jumping with joy at the sight of the small child in the front of the store.

"Henderson!" Steve's smile was huge. The sight made you smile, albeit a bit more confused. "Henderson! He's back, he's back!"

"I'm back! You got the job!"

"I got the job!"

And then, just when you thought this strange scene could not get any weirder, Steve mimed playing a trumpet and both he and the child did a strange miming handshake, giggling all the while.

Robin leaned forward. "How many children are you friends with?"

Steve's overjoyed smile slipped from his face. He gestured to Robin with a strained look on his face, as if he were signaling See what I have to deal with?

"You mean there's more children?" you asked, walking up to them with a shy smile, almost embarrassed to make your return. Your stomach dipped as Steve turned to you, but his smile was back.

"Hey, you're back!" Steve said. "I thought we'd never see you again!"

You shrugged. "Yeah, well, I got tired of Billy flirting with me."

"Max's brother?" the child asked.

You stared at him. "I don't know who that is. Or who you are, actually."

"Oh, I'm—"

"This is Dustin," Steve interrupted. "Dustin Henderson. He's, uh, he's one of my friends." He went behind the counter and started making an ice cream sundae.

You gave Dustin your name and offered him your hand. "Pleasure to meet you."

"How do you know Steve?" Dustin asked.

At the same time, both you and Steve pointed to Robin. She waggled her fingers at him.

"I'm going on break," Steve said, handing the sundae to Dustin. "Your turn to man the counter. Come on, Dustin, my treat!"

The two of them slipped into a booth. You leaned against the countertop with a heavy sigh.

"There's like...five or six of them," Robin said. "Kids, I mean. That he's friends with."

"Jesus," you muttered. "How old are these kids?"

"Like...thirteen, maybe?"

"Oh, boy."

Robin giggled. "Looks like you gotta share your man with children now."

You choked. "He's— He's not my man, Robin!" you hissed, your entire body burning. You glanced at Steve, but he was too engrossed in whatever story Dustin was telling him.

"But that's why you're here, isn't it?" Robin asked. "You came back because you're ready to talk to him again, knowing that you like him and he likes you."

You glanced over at Steve. While you observed him, Robin slipped out from behind the counter, quietly humming to herself as she worked.

"Yeah, I mean, sure," he was saying to Dustin. "It's not really a good idea for me though, gotta keep in shape for the ladies." Was it just your imagination, or did his eye stray over toward you?

"Yeah, and how's that working out for you?" Robin teased.

"Ignore her," Steve said quickly.

"She seems cool," Dustin said.

"She's not," Steve said, even quicker. "But, uh, the girl you just met? She's cool. She's really cool." A smile tugged at your lips. You pushed it away as you looked down at the floor, completely missing Steve's lovestruck glance toward you.

Dustin, however, missed nothing, and raised his eyebrows. "Oh, really, Steve?"

Steve cleared his throat. "Anyway. So, uh, where are the other knuckleheads?"

"They ditched me yesterday," Dustin said.

"No," Steve said, his face falling. Your heart squeezed at the sight of his empathy. The Steve from high school never would have cared about a kid whose friends had abandoned him, but this Steve did.

"My first day back! Can you believe that shit?"

"Whoa, seriously?!" Steve demanded, incredulous. Your heart warmed once again.

You turned back to Robin. "In answer to your earlier question," you said under your breath, "yes, that is exactly what I'm here to do."

She giggled. "I knew it! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!" She paused. "Was Billy Hargrove really flirting with you?"

You nodded. "I guess he doesn't really care about high school social status, as long as he gets laid." You shuddered. "I've never felt more objectified in my life, and I pranced around on stage in fishnets and a bodysuit in front of the entire school last year during Chicago!"

"I'm still convinced that was our best show," Robin said.

"I'd like to know how we got the rights to it," you snorted.

"I'd like to know how we convinced Principal Higgins to let us perform it."

You snorted. "Yeah. Has anybody heard anything about next year's shows?"

"Nothing yet," Robin said.

You harrumphed, your gaze sliding back to Steve and Dustin and found them talking in hushed tones. Steve's face was fixed into an expression of embarrassed confusion.

"Oh, got customers, hang on," Robin said, and served them while you moved off to the side, watching Dustin speak behind his hand. Steve just blinked at him and told him to speak up.

"I intercepted a secret Russian communication!" Dustin said, far too loudly.

The entire store went quiet. You and Robin exchanged a glance.

"Jesus, shhhh!" Steve hissed. "Yeah, okay, that's what I thought you said."

Business as normal resumed and Robin's customers headed for their own table.

You cleared your throat. "Well, I guess I should head out—"

"No, no, no, wait! What about Steve?"

"He's busy, Robs," you said, gesturing to him. Your stomach did flips at the cute, teasing little expression on his pretty face as you caught him saying American heroes. You weren't sure you wanted to know what mischief they were getting into. "I'll just...come back tomorrow."

Robin sighed. "Fine. As long as you let me play matchmaker!"

You rolled your eyes. "You've been doing that for the past, what, four years?"

"Yeah, but this time I might actually be successful!"

You shook your head with a smile. "Catch you later, Robin. Bye, Steve!" you added as you walked past.

Steve's head snapped up. He scrambled up from his seat at the booth. "Hey, wait, wait, where are you going?" He caught your arm and your eyes darted to his fingers on you. Every possible excuse was wiped from your head. "I thought you were gonna stay and...hang out for a little while."

You smiled apologetically. "Yeah, I was going to, but your friend just came back, so I figured I'd just come back another time. So you don't have to...divide your already divided attention, y'know?" You gestured back to the counter.

Though there was understanding in Steve's eyes, he still looked disappointed. "Oh...um... Would you—" He cleared his throat, his cheeks gaining a deep pink shade. "Would you maybe wanna hang out together—" He stopped again. "Would you wanna go on a date? With me? Sometime?"

You couldn't stop the smile that stretched across your face. "When?"

"Oh, you know, whenever you want? If you want to, I mean."

You stopped his rambling with a finger against his lips. His eyes widened. "I want to, Steve. I really, really want to. I always have."

He beamed. "Really?"

"Really," you promised. You patted his chest. "Even in this stupid little uniform."

He laughed. "What do you say to...two days from now? Meet me here at the end of my shift so Robin can make fun of us like always—" You laughed with him. "—and then we can go see a movie?" His thumb caressed the skin of your arm. That single touch alone sent butterflies through your stomach, not to mention the beautiful, sappy look in his eyes.

"I'd like that," you said. "I'd like that a lot."

"And, um, if you'd like, there's a little dinner about ten minutes from here with awesome milkshakes we could go to after."

You beamed. "Oh, Steve."

"Yeah?"

"You're absolutely perfect," you said to him, cupping his cheek and smoothing your fingers over his skin. He hummed happily. "Steve?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I... Do you... Can we kiss? I know it's soon, it's just... I've wanted this for a long time."

Steve beamed. He leaned in, cupping the back of your head and pulling you into him. His lips touched yours, and you swore your body crackled with electricity. A feeling similar to pins and needles, but far more pleasant, spread throughout you.

He made to pull away. You brought both your hands to his cheeks and held him to you, kissing him for all you were worth.

In the booth, Dustin's mouth dropped open. A grin spread across his face.

At the counter, Robin, who couldn't see the kiss but saw your hands slide into Steve's hair, pulled out her whiteboard and added a singular tally into the 'You Rule' column.

She glanced back at you and Steve. Steve had broken the kiss to tug you close to him, hugging you to his chest. You twisted your hand into his hair, smiling over his shoulder, your eyes closed against the rest of the world.

Robin grinned; she guessed the 'You Suck' tallies didn't matter anymore. Steve had found the one his charm worked on.

☞ ❊ ☜

Stranger Things // Steve Harrington

part 2 coming soon!

Taglist: {comment and let me know if you'd like to be added to the S.H. taglist!} @ohatropa@nix-rose@live-the-fangirl-life

[goldenslumbersketchbook]

Sketchbook Log: Part 4 of the Overland Witch AU - The Trial

Beginning: here

Previous: link

Next: link

[rovermcfly]

let's settle this once and for all

[sexycraisinthanos]

Nature is hard to draw but beautiful men aren’t

[kidcore-nostalgia]

[dearharriet]

yooo could you write a oneshot of fem reader and eddie??? maybe with a angsty prompt, like they share some sort of trauma together but have been friends for a while & eventually realize they love each other?

i actually love how this one came out :) ty for requesting! 🫶🏻(1.2K) (cw: mentions of death)

The hand pushing your hair back is cool against your flushed skin, and it slows the tears little by little. Eddie is shushing you softly and holding your hands—or, you’re clinging to his, and he’s letting you.

Something always comes over you in the fall. The smell and the colors, it’s all too reminiscent. Small memories that gleam with nostalgia flutter around the Big One, shrouding it and then revealing it all over again. It’s hard to decide which you’re crying for.

Looking up at Eddie, you can tell he’s worried sick. You muster a wobbly smile for him, and he laughs kindly.

“Y’feeling better?”

You nod and close your eyes, and his delicate petting becomes more open-handed on your hairline. Sucking in a breath, you let the homey scent of his trailer ground you.

“Wasn’t so bad,” you remark. “This time, at least.”

“Mm-mm,” Eddie hums, wiping your damp cheeks. “Just a little one.”

Eddie would know. He’s been holding your hand through these episodes since they started.

“Do you want to go?”

To the quarry, goes unsaid.

As kids with little supervision and even less money, there weren’t many places you could go that weren’t home. The quarry became your solution. Even now, in your early twenties, diners or cinemas never give you the same relief.

Still, you shake your head. The tin roof over your head seems to contain the mountain of unhappiness well enough, and it was never really about the place.

“I wanna stay here,” you mumble. “Could we lay down?”

Eddie looks mildly shocked, but he doesn’t miss a beat.

“‘Course we can, sugar.”

Smiling tiredly, you let him walk you to the couch. You rub your face into the matching pillow as you lay down on your side, reveling in the familiar itch. Instead of laying down with you, Eddie ducks into the kitchen to get you water.

“Y'know what I’ve been thinking about, Eds?” Phlegm clogs your nose from the crying, becoming noticeable as you raise your voice to be heard across the trailer.

“Me?” Eddie asks, his tone teasingly hopeful. The faucet runs and then stops.

“How did you know,” you gasp. Eddie waltzes back to the couch with a grin.

“S’just common sense.” Eddie hands the water off to you, and fusses his way under your legs as you drink your way through half of it.

When you settle back in, on your back this time, Eddie’s looking at you softly.

“What were you thinking about?”

The thought felt so grandiose—you were hoping to shout it into existence when he wasn’t looking at you. Fingers fidgeting, you try your best.

“Um. I was thinking,” you start, “about your mom.”

Eddie’s face shifts, just barely.

“About mine and yours,” you say. “And…”

This is so stupid.

“I wondered if they’re off being best friends, just like you and me.”

Expression falling, Eddie pats your leg sympathetically.

“I don’t know that my mom deserved a friend like your mom, sugar.”

Something about his voice plants a longing in your chest, and his cold rings soothing your calves nurtures it further. It’s almost unbearable to be close to him like this.

“But maybe that’s what she needed,” you argue, though it’s barely a debate. You’re both too tired and limp and honest.

“Maybe your mom needed someone that would believe in her. Maybe she needed someone to save.”

Eddie presses his lips together, and you realize what you’ve implied a little too late. That Eddie wasn’t worth caring about, wasn’t worth saving. You backpedal immediately.

“I’m sorry, that’s not—“

“No, I know,” Eddie assures, reaching to brush the hair off your face. “I know.”

A small, sad smile creeps over you. It’s unfathomable how Eddie has learned any kind of tenderness in his short life, yet it seems to flow out of him like he can’t hold anymore. You will never understand how he’s become an unwilling pariah to a town that knows nothing about him. Maybe now, with his intense aura, but as an eleven year old boy?

Your chest houses a battle of emotions, a hurricane you can’t control. You take Eddie’s hand from your face.

“I wasn’t really thinking about our moms,” you admit. Eddie frowns. “Or I was. But only because I was thinking about you.”

Hand tightening around yours, Eddie asks, “How so?”

“I..I found that Rock ‘em Sock ‘em we stole in seventh grade. I was cleaning under my bed and I found it in an old box and I—“ You suck in a breath, shaking your head. “I couldn’t believe how old it was, or that I still had it. I…I can’t believe how long I’ve known you. Ten years.”

A glance surges between you, fraught with memories and potential.

“I was thinking about who I’d be if I’d never met you. Who you would be. If we’d even like each other—“

“‘Course I’d like you,” Eddie insists, adding a second hand to clasp firmly over your intertwined fingers. His voice is fried and shaky.

“And I was thinking—“ you continue, “—about how you came at the perfect time.”

Your turbulent emotions start to overflow, and a tear slides into your hair.

“I think our moms must have planned it.”

Eddie laughs wetly, and you realize belatedly that he’s crying, too.

“Yeah,” he agrees, “maybe.” His free hand takes your face again, and he’s nearly laying on you now. Laughing, he starts wiping your tears away all over again.

“What’s funny?”

His laugh picks up more, and you can’t help staring at his mouth, his teeth. His tongue, when he speaks.

“I’m fuckin’ sorry your mom died and all you got was me.”

Frowning, you shake your head ardently.

“Worth it,” you murmur, and Eddie’s smile turns, half pained, half awed.

“Yeah,” he whispers, grazing his thumb over your eyebrow. “Yeah, I think so, too. I’m sorry if that’s selfish.”

There’s real guilt there, but real relief, too—like he’s been holding the thought too close for too long. Fingers tracing his nose, his mouth, you say, “Eddie?”

He hums, completely involved in you. Fear and passion and impatience spin a merry web in your throat, but you push through anyways.

“Is this love?”

You’re not sure which comes first, his smile or yours.

“God, I hope so,” Eddie speaks reverently, playfully. “I can’t wait much longer.”

“Me, neither,” you croak, caught between crying and laughing.

You shimmy down while Eddie crawls up, and then it’s like every closed door is open. Your fingers are in his hair, and his hand is warming over your waist. His lips are on yours, tender and searching.

“Do you still have it?” Eddie asks, nose still rubbing yours. “The Rock ‘em Sock ‘em?”

You laugh brightly.

“‘Course I do. On my dresser.”

Beaming, he nuzzles his nose into your cheek, pressing rapid kisses on your skin.

“We gotta dust that baby off. Bet you I could still kick your ass.”

“What d’you mean ‘still‘? I did all the ass kicking!”

Eddie shushes you, sarcastically condescending.

“Ohhh, sweetheart, no. I think your memory is a little foggy.”

You try to push him away, feigning annoyance, but he wedges his way back into your arms.

“Whatever. I guess we’ll have to wait and see.”

“We will,” Eddie agrees, “later.”

Then his mouth is on yours again.

+

thank you for reading!

masterlist

[zafirosreverie]

The Brightest Star (North x F!Reader)

Every year since I have this blog I have written at least one fanfic for North when Christmas is close, I couldn't let this one be the exception, so I hope you like it.

______________________________

You sighed as you tried to control your shaking hands, you really didn't want to ruin another machine, but nothing seemed to work. You couldn't help it, not when he was so close, even if you couldn't see him, you could feel it in your bones, that terrible, ancient fear that stabbed into your skin like a million needles, seeming to inject those horrible shadows into your being.

You shuddered when the memory of that terrible day suddenly came to your mind. You had blocked out most of the details, but you remembered perfectly the feeling of a deathly cold hand wrapping around your throat, stealing all the air from your body, the darkness slowly filling your senses and the screams of children echoing in your ears.

Pitch Black had escaped, but you could still feel his grip on you.

"Are you ok?"

You jumped when you felt a large but warm hand on your shoulder and thanked everything in your mind that you hadn't screamed when you saw blue eyes filled with concern staring at you.

“Yeah, I’m fine” you lied.

The man didn't seem to believe you, but he was kind enough not to push, so he just gave you a gentle squeeze and took a seat next to you. Internally you were grateful that he was so easy to work with, because you were sure that your teacher would already be questioning you.

You silently passed him the toolbox and returned to your own project, allowing muscle memory to take the reins and letting your memory wander back to that day, though not to Pitch's terrible memories, but to the bright light that you had next to you.

Nicholas St. North, retired bandit, loud but kind man, Santoff Claussen's savior. Again, you didn't remember the details, but you did remember the way the blanket of darkness around you was suddenly broken with the clean cut of a sword, and the cold that seeped into your bones slowly melted with the warmth of a pair of big arms. You felt safe even without knowing who the man holding you was.

North had saved you, he had saved your home, your children, magic, and because of that he had not only earned a place as Ombric's apprentice, but, without knowing it (and you wouldn't admit it), he had earned a permanent place in your heart.

He was a brilliant man, with surprising ingenuity, his inventions surpassed anything that had been created before in the town, and a heart of gold. Ombric had given him a place in his house, and since you were also technically his apprentice, it was a matter of time before you struck up a friendship with the former bandit, to the point that your teacher joked that you couldn't live without him anymore.

Not that you cared, you liked North more than you were willing to admit, and the man in the moon knew that man needed a family, a home to belong to, and you hoped, deep down, that somehow you could be part of it.

You just wished he could see how special he was, that he could see himself the way you and Katerine saw him. Despite his carefree attitude and the confidence he projected in front of others, especially in front of children or Ombric, you knew that guilt and memories of his past life still haunted him, that he often questioned whether he really deserved a place as a guardian.

"Do you think I'm worthy?" he asked

"You are" you smiled, reassuring him "you're a really bright star"

________________________________

You smiled as you watched the elves running around, getting between the tables and getting in the Yetis�� way, who were already too used to it to really bother with them. You loved this time of year, the bright lights, the decorated trees, the colors, the warmth of the fireplaces, the cookies, the gifts, and in the middle of it all, him.

In the end, Ombric had been right, you couldn't stay away from North, so when he formed his alliance with the Yetis, moved to the North Pole and built his magnificent city where his inventions brought joy to everyone, you had naturally been at his side.

It had been a long time since you had finally admitted your feelings for the man, and with Manny's blessing (who had made you age as slowly as North did), you had sworn to share his mission of protecting wonder in children for whatever centuries you had left.

"Mrs. Claus" a cheerful voice sounded behind you.

You smiled as you turned to him. In front of you was Santa Claus himself, as imposing as the legends said, with the years reflected in his face, which still retained its childish warmth and as handsome as the day you met him.

"Mr. Claus" you replied "ready for your big night?"

Christmas Eve was always a busy and difficult night for North, but you knew that, like you, he would never change the children's joy at seeing that Santa had visited them for anything. 

He simply smiled and offered his hand to you, escorting you down the hallway as you headed to the reindeer shed. You never accompanied him on deliveries, preferring to wait for him with a cup of hot chocolate and freshly baked cookies, but you were always there to watch him leave. He had said you gave him luck, and you never questioned it.

"Tell me, darling" he whispered "do you still think I'm worthy?"

Oh, so it was one of those nights. Despite everything he had experienced, despite how much he had done for children and for the world, there were still echoes of his ghosts walking through his mind. It wasn't as frequent anymore, maybe once every few years, but sometimes, he still needed you to remind him how special he was.

"North" you said softly "look around you. Look at everything you've created, the wonderful ideas you've made come true, look how much this place has grown"

Carefully, you let go of his arm so you could take his hands instead, making him look at you with an intensity and fragility reserved for you.

"But most of all, look at what you have become, everything you represent" you said "You are not only the guardian of wonder, you are more. Christmas is not only about gifts and beautiful lights, it is the memories that are created, the love that is strengthened, the joy that is shared, the illusion that is reborn even in adults. You represent all that. Even when the magic seems lost, people find it again in your figure, in your celebration"

North smiled and closed his eyes, savoring the feel of your palm as you caressed his cheek gently.

"You are the most important guardian, protector of magic" you continued "and you are the brightest star of Manny's new golden age."

[artist-issues]

Omg I was gonna recommend rotg to you since it’s my favorite Dreamworks film besides HTTYD. So happy to find another fan of it! The fandom is lovely and the book series does a good job adding more background to the characters. If you want to talk about it at all, feel free; right now I’m feeling a lot like Jack in the beginning (lonely and invisible) so I’d love to gush over it with someone who gets it. ^^

I love Rise of the Guardians! I don’t think I’ve ever analyzed it before to figure out why. I think it’s probably just how earnest it is. It’s really firing on all cylinders, really trying to create moments of genuine impact and emotion out of characters that everybody has had a take on for like…several generations.

They didn’t just do their take on holiday characters. They tried to pay homage to everything a kid would like about those characters in their wildest fantasies. So yeah, Santa has tattoos and swords, but you know what else, he’s still jolly and jiggling his belly around and laughing. He still feels like Santa. He doesn’t feel like A Superhero Version of Santa. Because they put thought into having him be seen first in his workshop, making something, then making loud, silly noises of distress when it gets smashed. His first scene is not a superhero scene.

Bunny, too. Bunny is probably the farthest thing from what anyone imagines the Easter Bunny to be. But it feels like, if the character designers sat ten years-olds down and said, “okay, here’s a bunny. Now what if I give him boomerangs, should he have boomerangs? What if I make his legs longer so he’s up tall, should I draw that? Now what if he can throw eggs like grenades, should I draw that?” The ten year-old would be saying, “YES! YES!” At every question.

And they put so much effort into the way the characters move. But at the same time, nothing is too violent, or too scary. But they’re not afraid to do real, genuine emotion, or tackle hard subjects like, “What Does it Mean to Believe in Something?”

And they come at this movie from a kid’s perspective. I know they owe a lot to Joyce, but the movie has a lot of heart put into it. I don’t think it would lend itself very well to a sequel, but for a one-shot, it was wonderful. I think I saw it four times in theaters.

[smaeemo]

It’s crazy to see how people interpret dean and sam’s brother dynamic as “wincest”

Some people have clearly never had a parentified older sibling. Then you take into account the degree of trauma that they have been through and continue to go through. Their codependency stems from their childhood and current traumas, their mental states due to that, the way they grew up with their father obsessing over the importance of “family is everything,” and the deep parentification of Dean, AKA Dean having to be a CHILD while raising his little brother, and taking care of his insane father. It’s not “wincest”/incestuous in anyway, it’s called trauma, parentification and general unstable family dynamics.

I think that a lot of “wincest” shippers don’t actually see what trauma can do to a person and their dynamics, specifically the people that endured that trauma with you. Dean, who was the older one that had to in HIS WORDS “be the mother, father, and brother” of his younger brother since the age of !4! is obviously going to be extremely protective/codependant of/with Sam, both because of the parentification and the words of his father carved into his very being. As for Sam, having Dean be all those things for him, means that more than anything, Dean is it for him because Dean RAISED HIM. Which is why, for so many reasons, what John said to Dean (killing Sam), was one of the most cruel things he could have done. John if not straight out, on some level knows that Dean and Sam will forever have a different dynamic because Dean raised Sam, ergo, Dean being more of a Parent to Sam than he ever was.

That’s not to say I think Dean was a “perfect parent” to Sam when he was raising him. No one can be “perfect” especially not a teenager raising his baby brother. What it means is that Dean had to sacrifice his childhood and grow up quickly for Sam to be not only Alive, but also so that Sam could -have- a childhood. All of this while Dean was still actively growing up, enduring his father, hunting, and having to come to terms with monsters. But he couldn’t allow himself to mess up, and going back to the idea of “perfect parenting” we see that no, he in fact was never “perfect” specifically when he leaves so that he can play games, and he sees that Sam’s safety is (extremely unfairly) placed on his shoulders. All of this, yet again along side with never having a stable home, having an unreliable source of income, and having to basically learn how to be an adult at 7, was the start of their dynamic.

As for Sam, we see that he got to play on soccer teams, go to school, and exist (while still having to endure all of the nightmares that is his homelife) outside of the hunting. Whereas Dean was the one who gave him this chance. This is not to say that Sam should ever feel guilt over this, or that Dean needed to do this. This is to show just how different their sibling relationship is, due to the trauma.

Dean treats Sam like a brother many times, but underneath it (or on top) you will always see that he is a parent to him more than anything.

“Wincest” is talking about their “strange/codependant relationship” in a romantic or purely sexual manner. This in itself just shows how many people don’t understand what it means to either have a kid or be a parentified older sibling. (I personally am not a parentified older sibling, but my sister who practically raised me is) and because of MY family dynamic I can speak from experience (definitely not to Dean and Sam’s extent) of having a parentified older sibling, and how that differs from regular sibling relationships.

Ok, this was a ramble, but as a whole “wincest” is extremely disturbing to me as a whole. And I don’t know what the rules are on this specific topic, so Idk how much I should say. But I definitely don’t condone inc*st to any degree, but to each their own ig.

Alright, I have SO much more to say on this topic. But I will hold back for now, just because I am sleepy.

XOXO

[katetorias]

a warmup before work. i feel embarrassed talking about these feelings. of course Santa Claus isn’t real. but North is, to me. i have memories of spending time with him, memories of a room he has for me at the Pole. but to everyone else he’s santa. being a fictive is sometimes painful, im never going to see north again. or anyone. but there’s nothing I can do about that, except remember them and keep living ❄️

[ryanthel0ser]

HAPPY 12TH ANNIVERSARY RISE OF THE GUARDIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANS!!!

My first major hyperfixation, site of the original blorbo for me or as I like to say patient 0

*picks up Jack Frost* You are the source of so many of my tastes in character

[bumblingbabooshka]

I think it'd be funny if Tuvok was from some isolated town where everyone loved him and he hated it. Like, to be clear NO ONE outside of his hometown has heard of him but for some reason his family is important in the town and only this one town [perhaps they're religious leaders due to his strong spiritual ties] and so whenever he's there he's treated like a local celebrity. People stop him to talk in the street. He gets discounts at any local store without asking. If he's visiting with his kids they'll get showered with toys and candy. They love it but Tuvok's grumbling about how this is why he moved... I just think it'd be funny if Tuvok came from a very niche-ly privileged upbringing that he treated like a dark backstory. You don't want to see his childhood hometown....it's fucked up...it was like hell, living somewhere where you were popular and everyone doted on you...you'd never understand his pain. He was voted class president every year and didn't volunteer once. He didn't even show up to a single meeting one year and they still voted him in the next year. When he returns to his hometown after the Voyager incident he finds that nearly everyone in town came to greet him and is logically mortified. Janeway or whomever is like "Tuvok this is such a sweet gesture" while Tuvok's glancing around for a cliff to jump off. He has a plaque dedicated to him at the local temple when he didn't even serve there. Guy who wants to be left alone vs Entire town of people who love and respect him