#spell punk librarian

[shadowwizdaily]

The Shadow Wizard of the Day is Spell Punk Librarian from Skylanders: Ring of Heroes!

[yourlocaltoad]

Spell Punk librarian's abilities from Skylanders: Ring of Heroes (Skylanders: Ring of Heroes, 2018)

[unofskylanderspages]

Seen above: The Spell Punk Librarian fight in Ring of Heroes

[noxcorvorum]

Do you have any horror podcast recs

I liked tma and old gods of Appalachia but I'm caught up and need to BINGE

hello! youve come to the right place :)

Ghost Wax feels kindof similar to tma, especially tma season 1, with the main character (Owen Voncid) taking statements of people who've encountered the supernatural. However, Owen is a necromancer (the last Reclaimer!) who briefly reawakens the dead so that they can tell their final story, and all of the statement givers are dead. He also has an assistant, Luca Eso, who made the wax cylinders that he uses (he's been around for a very long time, and the remembrances are beginning to slip from his brain) and is a pop culture nerd. They work with a seer, Pip (or Phillipa Le Fay, to respect the stagecraft), who uses her grandmother's tarot cards.

All three of these people work for the Order of Hamsa, which fights the supernatural. Hamsa are incredibly powerful entities who have magic such as geomancy and necromancy, and usually inhabit a human body, though generally not for an incredibly long amount of time. There are several Hamsa in this podcast, including Owen. Owen has remained in his body for much longer than usual. Some other characters I enjoyed are Emea, the apiarist as well as Owen's best friend and a Hamsa, Cosa, the android librarian/archivist, and Azem, who is very thoroughly haunting the narrative. Don't look away.

I absolutely love this podcast, its easily in my top three. There's several incantations/spells which are so fun to me, found family, and really fun sound effects. It has 46 episodes as well as 2 Tales from the Vault, which are filled with smaller stories (I submitted a story to the second one!), there's content on patreon, and season 2 is in production.

Malevolent is about Arthur Lester, a 1930s private investigator from Arkham, Massachusetts, and the voice in his head and his eyes. Episode 1 opens with Arthur coming to on the floor of his office, suddenly blind, a strange entity speaking to him, and his business partner dead on the floor. Arthur and John, as the entity comes to be named, must now figure out how to navigate the horrors, try to find a way to separate themselves, and figure out where John came from. There's lots of cosmic horror/lovecraftian influences in here, and they have so many miles to go before they sleep.

There's a LOT of audio gore/squishy flesh sounds/Arthur screaming because the horrors love ripping into him, so if that's no good then this podcast is not for you. Some of the more eldritch characters also have voice filters, most notably John, which could make them hard to understand, though there are transcripts available. the plot can also be a little hard to follow sometimes.

I really enjoy this podcast, I'm currently relistening to it and having a great time. It's kindof forced family? because Arthur and John physically cannot get away from each other and yet they Have To communicate. They're so so much "its rotten work" "not to me, not if its you" AND "its rotten work" "especially to me, especially if its you, ill do it but christ alive". It's currently 42 episodes at usually 40ish minutes each, and still going, with new episodes releasing mostly monthly. There's also one voice actor, everyone sounds similar because it's the same guy.

Hello from the Hallowoods is a post apocalyptic show about identity, grief, family, and survival. It's formatted as a radio broadcast by an entity named Nikignik, who narrates everything. There is one voice actor for the majority of this show (save for the occasional character speaking outside of Nikignik's broadcast), and they do an amazing job, especially considering the amount of characters.

Some of the characters I really enjoy are Diggory Graves, a nonbinary frankenstein's monster with knife hands and a leather jacket, Percy Reed, a transmasc piano ghost, Riot Maidstone, the lesbian punk daughter of a rockstar, Olivier Song, a genderfluid cloud witch, Ray, a ghost possessing an automobile, Moth Scarberry (moth/mothself), Ray's adopted kid, Walt Pensieve, the asexual groundskeeper of the Hallowoods, and Polly, a devil in a floral suit. Some of the antagonists include Lady Ethel Mallory, a gaslight gatekeep girlboss of a marketing specialist for an evil corporation and the Instrumentalist, a religious fanatic who keeps killing people and turning them into instruments. Darker than your dreams, and farther north than you remember, the Hallowoods loom.

Each episode has a different theme based on the title (such as Keys, Names, and Bones), and is split into several different stories that follow different characters as Nikignik jumps around. There's not very many voice filters, because Nikignik is doing the voices himself, though I think there are a few, and transcripts are available. There's 145 episodes at usually 30 to 50 minutes each, and a new one releases every wednesday.

Sidenote, the Instrumentalist is *really* religious as well as homophobic and transphobic, and he regularly misgenders/deadnames a trans main character. He only exists in the show for about 50 episodes, and definitely gets what he deserves.

The White Vault is a found footage podcast with the first two seasons comprising a repair team's trip to Outpost Fristed in Svalbard. They go up to repair some damaged equipment as well as look at some weird readings, and then have to wait out a massive storm. They find a hatch in the auxiliary bunker, and explore the tunnels beneath to find a village beneath the ice. Theres Graham Casner, the survival guide, Walter Heath, the repair technician, Karina Shumacher-Weiß, the geologist, Rosa De La Torre, the medic, and Jónas Þórirsson, the representative of the company sending them. Travel is not advised.

I listened to the bulk of the first 2 seasons at 2 am while playing powerwash simulator, and it made me so incredibly anxious that I had to have my back to a wall *in the game* so nothing could sneak up one me. Highly recommend. There's so much fear and helplessness surrounding what could be hiding in the storm and in the ice, and I absolutely love the concept for the antagonists.

Seasons 3 and 4 are about a different team in Patagonia, season 5 checks back in at Svalbard, and season 6 is somewhere else entirely. 3-4 are pretty alright in my opinion, maybe a bit repetitive as it follows a similar pattern to the first two seasons, but I don't hate them. I think 5 is pretty good, though it has my favorite character in it, so, you know. I think 6 goes in a bit of a different direction, though I'm not caught up so I can't really comment on it. Seasons 1 and 2 are absolutely stunning, though.

The creators and cast of seasons 1-2 also have a horror dnd podcast called Dark Dice. I must admit I haven't finished the first campaign, though I really liked what I did listen to. I'm told the second campaign has Jeff Goldblum in it, and has 2 different parties with one hunting the other, though I haven't listened to it yet, so take that as you will.

Jar of Rebuke follows Dr. Jared Hel, a cryptid scientist with amnesia in a small Midwestern town, and perhaps closer to the cryptids than they realize. They're also immortal, and (for a reason I don't remember at this particular moment) he has to wear a key around his neck, and never take it off. I'm not caught up, though I really liked what I did listen to. There's lots of fun cryptids and supernatural happenings, such as Jared getting a hellhound as a pet. The episodes are about 10-20 minutes each, and it's ongoing.

As someone on tiktok so aptly said, if you have trust issues with your therapist, you probably shouldn't listen to this podcast. Jared is manipulated by their therapists, and we sometimes hear them talk about him like he's a test subject or creature, not a person.

Do You Copy is another found footage podcast surrounding Redtail National Park, which more or less contains an area called the Dead Zone, in which technology doesn't work and other spooky stuff happens. The Dead Zone has a possible imminent ecological disaster, and though the park is evacuated until the emergency is over, there are a couple people still inside. These include two ghost hunters, a hiker and their dog, and two park rangers who have been instructed to stay inside in hopes of hearing from the three others. I found the Dead Zone and what lies inside VERY interesting, both from a horror perspective and a speculative biology/ecology perspective. It is finished at 14 episodes.

The Hyacinth Disaster is a space horror found footage podcast, and easily in my top three (the other one on that list is tma). It is set in 2151, when Jupiter and Mars have been colonized, and the asteroid belt is being mined for resources. There are two main mining companies in the show, Halaesus Mining Co in Lagrange 4, Greek objects, and Lykaeon Minerals Corporation in Lagrange 5, Trojan objects. The Corvus, a ship contracted to Halaesus and ordered to survey and harvest an asteroid in Lagrange 5, was captured by Lykaeon and held for ransom, and Halaesus denies the ransom broadcast is true, unwilling to pay. The skeleton crew of the MRS Hyacinth has gone rogue in the slowly dwindling time limit to survey a possibly incredibly valuable asteroid, hoping to pay the ransom themselves. But they are 6 people manning a ship meant for 53, and there are so many things to go wrong.

Conlin Hynes is the captain of the Hyacinth and is a good friend of Ember Roth, the captain of the Corvus. Con isn't the greatest captain, not by a long shot, but he's incredibly loyal, and maintains a talented crew. Famke Hynes, or Blue, is Con's sister, and the captain of her own ship, the Sibirica. She would have been the captain of the Hyacinth had she won the rock paper scissors match when they first bought it. She's returned to the Hyacinth to run comms for her brother as they bring Ember and her crew home, and to blow things up along the way.

Finch is Con's wife, and doing an admirable job at being an one-person engineering and seismology team. She's doing her absolute best with the equipment they have that corporate refuses to replace or reapir. Dreadnought in exosuit 2 is by far the youngest of the crew at 24. He's a surveyor, and in fact surveyed Saniss 130991, the very rock they're at, himself. He saw the potential and purposefully misfiled it, hoping to make a bigger profit if corporate didn't know about it, and told Finch, who told Con, and now they're all here.

Grimm is in exo 4, one that he bought himself and has carefully maintained. He refuses to tell the others what he's named it. He moves around a lot, as he gets bored of jobs quickly. Seems like a hardass, but he's actually a pretty nice guy. Argus in exo 7 is one of Con's best friends, having worked with him and Grimm on several jobs. He's a pretty optimistic guy, and follows Grimm as he moves from job to job. His lucky object of choice is a surprise tool that will help us later.

There's lots of angst and horror but also lots of comedy. I've seen a couple reactions that thought there was too much comedy for the situation, but personally I really enjoyed it. It's 7 episodes long, at about 2.5 hours total. There's a lot of sound effects for the ship controls that could potentially be irritating, Dreadnought's dialogue is full of static and sometimes difficult to understand because his radio is partially broken, and there's a loud, extended, high pitched static sound often in the first few episodes (It's when they activate the squealer device, it lasts for about 10-15 seconds each time and there's a countdown from 5 right before), so if you have issues with mechanical/static sound effects, this probably isn't for you. There's transcripts for episodes 1-4 on the website, along with a database of more information about the world.

I'm so so normal about this podcast, I have a note full of facts and trivia (Ember was voted into captaincy by her crew, and according to dreadnought, the ratio of greek names to jovian objects is about 1 in 50,000), my senior quote was from here, I've relistened to it so many times. I cannot recommend this enough.

Among the Stars and Bones is another found footage space horror, but this time it's about anthropology and alien technology. The format is mission files being sent back to the company from a large team investigating an abandoned alien settlement. There's about 7 different perspectives, one from each branch of the team (xenoanthropology, IT, etc).

I really enjoyed it the first time I listened, there were a lot of good anxious moments. A couple of my favorite characters are Dr. Celia Pannella, who heads the xenoanthropology section, and Ben Kelleher, who heads the xenoarchaeology section. I found the alien science/speculative biology really really interesting.

Given you liked tma I'm assuming you know of The Magnus Protocol, but if you don't, it's pretty much Magnus but in a civil service job instead of archiving. It has such characters as Colin the longsuffering IT guy, Alice, who is coping with the horrors by ignoring them, Needles, and Chester and Norris, two text-to-speech voices who we have definitely never heard before (/s).

It has 10 episodes plus an Easter/April Fools special, and it's on a break until April 11th.

Mabel is a podcast about ghosts, families, secrets, and connections. Anna Limon is a carer who has been hired to take care of Mabel Martin's mother Sally. The house is odd, the house is alive, and the house is hungry. Anna is unraveling a mystery as fast as she can find the thread, and Mabel, having grown up half-feral and half-faeral, is somewhere under the Hill.

I will admit I haven't finished this show, but I would definitely recommend it. I actually had to restart it because I wasn't expecting to be as invested as I was. It is very much a faerie story, with riddles and all.

The Silt Verses is a story about faith, and what people will do to keep it. It follows Sister Carpenter and Brother Faulkner as they travel upriver, looking for revelations of their outlawed god, the Trawler-Man. There's a whole cast of gods, many of which are capitalistic, and most of the ones that are not have been outlawed. Some examples are the Trawler-Man of the river, the Waxen Scrivener of decay and books, the Saint Electric of radio and electricity, and the Cairn Maiden of graves and death.

I'd say it has semi similar vibes to Old Gods, mostly with the many deities and monsters. I'm only about halfway through it, but I'd definitely recommend it.

Hope you find something you enjoy!

[lyraarylfyrefly]

just had an epiphany about one of my ocs which was essentially what if they weren't triplets and she started out as the normal one in the friend group and she was an adult and the story was political and not magical girl adjacent

Okay, so essentially Leyla is a princess, the youngest of three, there's no real plan for her yet, the society they're in is very modern and she's 3. When the royal family of Cres along with some trusted retainers do a vacation with their 3 children, they get attacked and the heir apparent (13 or 14) gets transported to an alternate dimension none have returned from if unprepared, then the middle child (8 years old) gets grievously wounded and goes into a coma whilst the youngest princess gets torn apart by a faulty teleportation spell.

Meanwhile, Lyra is a young adult happily spending her time writing novels and being a librarian. The only problem is she has a stalker who at some point tries to kill her best friend 5ever. This doesn't work because Ruby's job is being part of an elite task force and she's on leave to hang out with her bestie.

This results in Ruby cashing in favors to protect her friend while she hunts down the stalker and Lyra talking to her friends that realize from her description of the stalker who exactly that stalker is and the subsequent panic. Why? Because they thought they's already dealt with her.

Throwback to a few years back when late teen Lyra complained to her punk young adult friends and sisters about a girl that was acting creepy towards her (didn't realize it bc of double standards) and therefore got her to prison.

Anyways this would turn from thriller to a lot of combat I've got to write this out now!!!!

[bloodiedpixie]

Summary:  The year is 1977 (summer to be exact), rebellion against the establishment and groovy patterns are on the rise. Simon Snow is a 20-year-old outcast trying to stumble his way through life. With labor strikes causing job loss and the inability to stay in one place, Simon is used to traveling, and can never find a real reason to stay in one place for more than a few months. 

Baz Grimm-Pitch is a 20-year-old librarian, who (accompanied by his two friends Dev and Niall) is just trying to find some direction in life. When Simon stumbles into the Grimm-Pitch library and sees a very attractive man (Baz) reading a book on the register counter, they both just might find what they're looking for.

Word Count: 6360

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

So this a 70s normal au fic I’ve written, so far only one chapter is up which you can read here!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28460262/chapters/69739998

and you can listen to the playlist that goes along with it here!

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5edgzIeLCmzylazIzE36ny?si=YKhJFDwRSrmCq8DvHUElaw

[andtherestishistory13]

Books I’d recommend to Greta Van Fleet. As a librarian I’m qualified for this and it’s fun!

Josh: Anything by Arthur C Clarke, even though I’m sure he’s read them because he likes 2001: Space Odyssey; The Time Machine by HG Wells; Dune by Frank Herbert; Something Like an Autobiography by Akira Kurosawa

Jake: Tolkiens other books (he has a great King Arthur book called The Fall of Arthur 10/10), The Republic of Pirates by Colin Woodard; Anne Bonny by Phillip Thomas; The Princess Bride by William Goldman; Jimi by Janie Hendrix

Danny: This was a little harder, but; Slash: The Autobiography by Slash; The Greatest Game Ever Played by Mark Frost; Sympathy for the Drummer by Mike Edison; The Body by Stephen King; Just Kids by Patti Smith

Sam: Just Kids by Patti Smith; Dune by Frank Herbert; The View From Space (it’s a NASA book); The Secret World of Stargazing by Adrian West; Laurel Canyon: The Inside Story by Mike Walker; Morning Glory on the Vine by Joni Mitchell; Where the Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls

Bonus: All: Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen; I Put a Spell on You by Nina Simone; Revenge of the She-Punks: A Feminist Music History by Vivien Goldman

[queerwrock]

Anti-jkr Wizard Rock

Anthony Goldstein by Chasitherin

Can't Stand Your Bigotry by The Fizzing Whizbees

Cherry Picking by AJ Solomon

Consider by Totally Knuts

Correct the Architect by Harry and the Potters

Cursed Child Isn’t Canon by The Weirdos Are Out

IV. Dead Words by Creevey Crisis

Dear Jo by Mary Lambert

Fandom Autonomous Zone by Tonks & the Aurors

Firework by The Weirdos Are Out

F*** You, JKR by Kalysta Flame

Good Ol’ Jo by Fangirl Riot

Harry’s Haikus by Sage Palmieri

Here (demo) by The Hogwarts Elevator

Hermione Granger’s Not a Transphobe by Kathryn Hoss

Hogwarts Never Ends by errandofmercy

Hut on the Wrock by Karl​-​Johan Nor​é​n

I’m a Puff, and I’m Staying by Dream Quaffle

I’m Magic by Aguamenti

Is There A Spell? by Ludo Bagman and the Trash

It’s Intersectional by Abby Ritter

JKR Freestyle by Aguamenti

JK Rowling and The Fascists of The Christ by Song a Day

Joanne by Hogwarts Therapist

Joanne by Grace Kendall

Just Kidding (Mugglef*cker) by Andri from Pagefire

My Cursed Child Review by Tianna and the Cliffhangers

Of Course by Bradley and the Dadleys

Open at the Close by Totally Knuts

Our Epilogue by CG Matovina

Power in a Fandom by Fangirl Riot

Revelry by Proma Khosla

Revisionist History by The Whomping Willows

Rewriting Your Story by Totally Knuts

Rogue Librarian by Ariel Factor Birdoff

Sit Down by Totally Knuts

Slytherin Anthem by Luna (Not) Lovegood

Start Again by Hogwarts Therapist

The Bi Who Lived (Prod. by Aguamenti) by Bisexual Harry

The Harry Potter Hannukah Song by Mikaila

The JKR by Sally Slytherin

The Metamorphmagus Song by Anna Dardick

The Queen by Jami Schafer

Tired by Totally Knuts

Transphobe Rowling by Craic Boi Mental

Unite! By The Arkadian

Waiting by Ashley Hamel

When Magic Was Magic by Witherwings

Where Do We Go From Here by Shauna Carrick

Wizard Ⓐnarchy by Candle Wix

Wizard Punks by Tonks & the Aurors

Yellow and Black by Boom Boom Racoon

You Said by Romilda Vane and the Chocolate Cauldrons

Masterlist

[hungry-skeleton]

Quick question

Who dis guy-?

Spell punk librarian! They're from ROH and are a minor boss but I love their design sm

[archivyrep]

"Reference only": 'The Librarian' and Archives in the world of 'Hilda' [Part 1]

The Librarian in the opening montage of every episode, which is part of the show's theme song

In my recent post for I Love Libraries, I focused on the importance of libraries and librarians in the animated show, Hilda. In this post I'd like to focus on archivy/archives themes in the show. While libraries appear in about nine minutes of the first season, in one episode ("Lost Clan"), the purple-and-black-haired librarian is not shown, and in another ("Nightmare Spirit"), the librarian, who gives off some serious goth vibes, or even some gay vibes, only appears briefly. She reminds me a lot of the half-demon and half-vampire punk rocker and "vampire queen," Marceline, in the Adventure Time series, although Marcy, a person who was born as half-human and half-demon, who later turned into a half-vampire/half-demon, is not a librarian in the slightest (and neither is her girlfriend). That leaves two episodes: "The Ghost" and "Tide Mouse." In this post, I'll look at those two episodes and note the archives themes in both.

Reprinted from my Wading Through the Cultural Stacks WordPress blog. Originally published on Sept. 23, 2020.

Let's start with the next episode, "The Tide Mice." Samantha Cross, who is kinda the POP Archives guru, since she has reviewed a LOT of depictions of archives and archivists in popular culture, has a post about this episode. She begins by noting how Hilda and Twig, her deerfox, Twig, find a secret special collections room in the Trolberg library, a room which is only seen one time in the series. While she notes that as a result the room is only seen in this episode it "doesn't make a huge impact on the story as a whole." However, she describes the Librarian as a "goth/witch librarian/reference archivist," which seems about right, accurately calling them overworked, although chill and generally helpful until a "precocious ten-year-old wants to take a spell book home for reasons."

She adds that it isn't the fault of the librarian that Hilda found a loophole to the librarian wanting the book to stay in the library by using the photocopying machine, calling it "a cautionary tale for those working at libraries and archives" because...wait for it... "never let precocious children use copiers." Definitely true! What she said made me laugh. Hilda photocopies a page of the book that she was reading when the Librarian confronted her in the special collections room, intending to help her friend, David, and her mom. Snobbishly she leaves the book face down on the copier while she reads the page she photocopied! You could say that this scene highlights the issues of “problematic patrons” in a library setting.

Later in the episode, she faces the consequences of her actions, learning that the enchantment of her friends will cause her to possess their souls, and returns to the library with Alfie and Frida. Hilda learns a lesson about copying a spell to "summon supernatural mice" and problems about magical interference: that spells don't care "about the intention of the user" even if that user's intentions are good. In this case, Hilda wants to help her friend David audition for the Warblers and her mom to be a successful graphic designer. I recommend you read what she has to say about the episode and many other pieces of popular culture media.

© 2022 Burkely Hermann. All rights reserved.

[that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick]

Summary: Winry sat in the optimal place to study in the school cafe for the entire fall semester. Then spring came, and suddenly some self-entitled twit who dressed like off-brand Gerard Way decided it was his territory. He was so not going to get off easy.

Rating: T

Word Count: 1.8k words of coffee shop/college AU with a side of enemies to almost-lovers

A/N: It's finals week, I posted this on Ao3 at almost 5am, and if the rest of the sentence didn't make it obvious, I'm writing from unfortunate experience. Not beta-ed or proofread, although I happened to see one thing to fix when I woke up this morning. Feel my raw power. Rawr.

It wasn't that big a deal.

It kind of really was, though.

Every Thursday morning during the fall semester, Winry sat in the same spot at the same school coffee shop. It was the spot sent by the entire patron pantheon of cram papers. Maybe one person didn't need an entire booth, but it was in the corner, and the tops of the bench seats had opaque plastic barriers that just so happened to be perfect for minimizing excess visual chaos. For the most part, there weren't loud conversations, and the jazz music that came through the speakers helped her tune out people ordering coffee. Add to that the fact that she could use campus flex dollars and not her own bank account that was begging for mercy, and it was the perfect spot to get papers done.

But apparently not this spring.

As soon as Winry walked in, she noticed him in the corner. Some emo wannabe guy on his computer. Probably on Reddit complaining about how women didn't appreciate the amazing pics he sent them on Tinder. Or at least, it was a fair guess based on the sour look on his face. Why did this guy of all people have to steal the holy grail spot? Ugh. She was still gonna get her coffee, darn it.

"You know the deal, Sciezska. Medium roast with a shot of espresso and vanilla creamer."

"On it! You paying in flex?"

"Yeah." She scanned her student ID and lowered her voice. "Who's off-brand Gerard Way in the corner?"

"Who's Ger—"

"The punk kid."

"Ohhh. I can try to get his number for you, if you want."

"No, he looks like a total tool! And not the kind I like dealing with!"

"Which means you think he's hot. I didn't think you were into that type, but you're not wrong."

"For the last time, no, Sciezska! He took my spot! And I'm trying very, very hard to keep this to a stage whisper, but if you keep trying to set me up with some random creep, I won't be able to!"

A distinctly male voice grumbled, "I'm not a creep."

"Keep telling that to the girls on Tinder. I'm sure they'll understand eventually."

"Yeah, and I'll bet if you look at your 'Live, Laugh, Love' sign a little more, you'll understand it eventually." He mumbled something under his breath.

"What was that, Mr. Nice Guy?"

"Lay off, it's eight in the morning. I said the only reason I even have a Tinder account is because my roommate stole my phone while I was going to the bathroom."

"Well, if you didn't want it, why didn't you delete it?"

"Eh, I figured if I really got sick of being single one day, it'd already be there."

"Never would have guessed you were single," Winry said dryly.

"Come on, it's way too early to be rubbing that kind of crap in. Who says I'm not fine with being single anyway?"

Sciezska timidly spoke up. "Medium roast with espresso and vanilla creamer?"

Winry thanked her as red jacket boy continued. "'Edward Elric, Bachelor.' Almost sounds as good as 'Edward Elric, Bachelor of Science.'"

"B.S. degree. Sounds about right."

"About time you stopped acting like I'm an idiot!"

Winry snorted. "That's not what I meant."

"Hey!"

"And with that, I'm going to go find some other spot to write my paper."

Edward, as his name apparently was, scoffed and mumbled something that sounded like "good riddance". Maybe the librarians wouldn't get on her case too much for bringing in coffee.

-----

A week later, Winry walked into the cafe, assuming the circumstances of the previous week were an anomaly. They were not.

"Medium roast with a shot of espresso and vanilla creamer," she grumbled and sulked in the direction of the corner seat.

"Hey, don't start with me again, blondie. I've had a whopping four hours of sleep and I can't promise you'll like what comes out of my mouth."

"We're at a coffee shop. Get some coffee. I can't help it if you're too hung over to be polite."

"Now look, genius. I did not stay up until 4 A.M. working on a stupid chem paper for that sadistic pyromaniac excuse for a professor just for some random chick to accuse me of being hung over."

"Oh."

"Yeah. And for your information, coffee doesn't really help me wake up. It just helps me focus on homework." He lifted up his empty cup and gave it a shake.

"That's the weirdest thing I've ever heard."

"ADHD is a weird thing, and yet, here I am."

"Huh, interesting."

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to pick up where I left off with the same stupid ten page paper I started last night."

"Oh right. Sure," Winry stammered. "Listen, I'm really sorry I just assumed things about you. It was wrong of me, and I'd like to make it up to you, if that's okay."

Edward eyed her suspiciously. "What do you have in mind?"

"Well...I could look over your paper once you're done writing it? I've got a paper of my own to write while I'm waiting, and I can sit right across the table here so you don't have to come get me. I won't try to talk to you or anything. Neither of us need that kind of distraction."

"Alright, alright. Get your coffee and sit down. The girl at the counter's been up there waiting for a good minute or two while you've been at confessional over here."

"Wait, she has?" Winry's eyes widened, and Edward laughed at her expense. He was kind of attractive when he wasn't scowling...wait what? She pouted and got up to retrieve her coffee. When Winry returned, she plopped down on the bench opposite Edward and opened her laptop. Peeking out from behind it, she added, "By the way, I'm Winry. I figured you ought to at least know the name of the person who's proofreading your paper."

"Well, Winry, you're the one who volunteered." The corners of his mouth twitched upward. The two worked on their assignments in silence, occasionally speaking up when necessary.

-----

Edward was in the corner again the next week as well.

"Hey, Edward! Mind if I join you for homework again?"

"Normally, I'd say no, but you didn't bother me too much last week, so you might as well." He turned away slightly.

"Great! Have you gotten your coffee yet? I didn't see a cup, and you got something the last two times."

"Eh, I haven't been here long. If you're going up and getting yours, would you mind ordering a caramel macchiato for me?" He asked, sliding his ID across the table.

"Yeah, no problem. I'll be back in a sec."

She returned and slipped his ID back before pulling out her computer. "Do you have anything for me to look over this time?"

"Not this week. But if you have anything you need looked over, I can do that, too."

"Actually, I do, if you wouldn't mind."

"Winry, I just volunteered. Just send the paper to my school email. Mine's 'elricedwa'," he instructed as he proceeded to spell it.

"Medium roast and a caramel macchiato?" Sciezska called out.

"Coming!" Winry replied and turned to Edward. "I just sent it, so you should be able to start while I'm getting our stuff." Eyes glued to his laptop, Edward gave a thumbs up.

Once she returned with their drinks, Winry sat down and wordlessly set Edward's drink next to him.

"Thanks," he muttered distantly. His lips mirrored the words he was reading. Though his lips weren't plump by any stretch of the imagination, they were shapely. His steely concentration made the air leave Winry's lungs. To top it all off, the first rays of sunlight came through the window just right, hitting Edward's hair in a way that made it positively glow.

What was she thinking? Those were only the sorts of things people thought when they had a crush. She'd only had two positive interactions with him, including this one. ...well, maybe it was a crush. She could certainly do worse than someone with a questionable fashion sense. After all, he worked hard, and he got good grades, if the quality of his writing was any indication. Okay, fine. He was also drop dead gorgeous, if you could see past his clothing choices. Yeah, she had a crush.

"Did you hear anything I just said?"

"...no."

"Figures. I finished reading your paper. It's not bad, I just left a few suggestions for sentence structure. Now I am going to enjoy my caramel macchiato." He took off the lid and breathed in the steam with his eyes closed, nearly drooping into the cup in content. When he opened his eyes slowly, Winry was awestruck by the similarity between the color of his eyes and his drink.

"What?" Edward furrowed his eyebrows.

"Nothing. I didn't say anything. At all. Nope."

"Okay." He shrugged. She reopened the document and went through his suggested edits. Gnawing her lip in concentration, she leaned forward a bit to settle in and tackle the editing.

"...hey, uh, Winry?" Edward gulped. "Are you going to drink your coffee?"

"Oh! Yeah, I almost forgot. Thanks, Edward!" she smiled.

"No–no problem. And you can call me Ed, you know. Most people do. Except for that excuse for a professor that calls me pipsqueak. Can you believe he's my advisor? I mean, come on, I'm a grown man. I'm not that short."

Winry made a poor attempt at containing her laughter. "Okay then, Ed. Prove it. Stand up."

"Fine." He slid out of the booth and stood. Winry followed suit and appraised their respective heights.

"Well, I'd hardly call you tall, but you're at least taller than me by a few inches, for whatever that's worth."

Edward grinned as if he had won some sort of prize. "Time for shorties to sit down now!"

"Watch it now. You're not too far from that label yourself, mister."

They both returned to their positions in the booth and worked steadily for the next hour. At the end of that time, Winry closed her laptop. "Ed, are you okay? You seem distracted."

"ADHD. I'm always distracted," he dismissed.

"No, like, are you sick or something? You did get more than four hours of sleep this time, right?"

"No comment." Ed's mouth twitched. He mumbled barely loud enough to hear, "Wouldn't have mattered anyway."

"Are you sure? If you're not feeling well, I can drive you over to the health center."

"N-no. That's not it." He exhaled, then slid a napkin across the table. His hands trembled slightly. "Anyway, here's my number. In case you need me to look over a paper. Or whatever. I've got a class soon."

Winry blushed, but tucked the napkin in her laptop. "Thanks, Ed. See you next week?"

"Yeah. Next week."

-----

Winry: This goes with your major, right?

Edward: Blocked

[yourlocaltoad]

Spell Punk Librarian's Soul stone icons from Skylanders: Ring of Heroes (Skylanders: Ring of Heroes, 2018)

[unofskylanderspages]

Seen above: A render of the Spell Punk Librarian, as seen for its boss battle

[dustedmagazine]

Listed: Jeffrey Alexander

Jeffrey Alexander is a fixture in a free-wheeling, Grateful Dead-loving, guitar jam underground, a founder of the Iditarod and Black Forest/Black Sea and a sometime member of Jackie O Motherfucker. His Direwolves splice acid folk with a buzzing, humming motoric-ness that edges near Stereolab, but his latest band, the Heavy Lidders, is pure transcendental pleasure. In her review, Jennifer Kelly noted that, “These songs take their time to loosen and relax, pursuing repetitive vamps until the edges melt away and the hard colors swirl into pastels.” Alexander is also a DJ and here he lists some of the music he spins for listeners.

For this Listed, I decided to run down some of the bootlegs and quirky things that I often play on my radio show — hope you dig it. I started doing radio back in college in the 1980s, where I was also the record librarian. The archives at the station opened me up to a myriad of sounds and new zones. Radio for me is like a new mixtape — not knowing what is going to come next… or waiting for the next mic break to try and find out the name of that killer song they played 15 minutes ago. The mystery of it all is still exciting, like remnants of pre-internet music fandom when we searched through record stores, made lists from music magazines and traded tapes. I had a spell as a commercial FM DJ on WRNR in Maryland in the 1990s, but it wasn’t until moving to San Francisco that I started my own program called Pome Pome Tones. PPT currently broadcasts Wednesdays 7-9pm Central fortnightly on www.dunebuggyradio.com. Podcasts are up at www.mixcloud.com/dwlvs.

Fairport Convention — Reno Nevada — April 27, 1968

Recorded live on the French TV program Bouton Rouge. Brooke Sietinsons of The Espers turned me on this this when we were VHS tape trading in 2000 and I’ve been retreating to it every so often for 20 years. This is Fairport at their most delightfully blinding San Francisco ballroom jamming free flight. It’s just so fucking good. I love the crisp dual vocals of Judy Dyble and Ian Matthews, I especially love that they both sit down and look so bored during the guitar jam out. Especially Judy, just like a Donna Jean icy stare. But the jam out is super nice too — modal jazzy freak-outs, some of Richard Thompson’s best ever captured on video. This takes the most boring song from my favorite Richard and Mimi Farina album to incredible new zones. I also tend to play a lot of Ian Matthews’ early 1970s records on my radio show, as well. Such a pure voice and perfect ringwear rock vibes.

The Smiths — How Soon Is Now? (Chopped + Screwed)

The chopped + screwed style coming out of Houston, TX in the late 1990s/early 2000s is so fascinating. Full-on Robitussin-fueled shamanism, it’s like the modern-day version of dub. There are so many examples of this across the spectrum, but this 10-minute chopped version of The Smiths takes the cake — probably because 16-year-old me in 1984 sat on the floor listening to the original version of this over and over again, studying the gatefold. But this version is so much better. Thank you Scobed + Robed.

I’m Still In Love With You (Alton Ellis, Sean Paul)

Althea + Donna’s Uptown Top Ranking is one of my all-time favorite songs, and one of John Peel’s as well. A well-worn Jamaican riddim starting with Alton Ellis in 1967 and made famous again by Marcia Aitken in 1977. DJ Algoriddim has expertly mixed together a boat load of these variations here and it’s a killer 30-minute jam.

Jon Rose – Paganini’s Last Testimony

When things get autumnal each year, I gear up for a spooky edition of my radio show. One of my favorites featured this Jon Rose piece which he originally broadcast on ABC, Australia in 1988. It’s an amazing sinister collage of bible-belt radio bits, demonic violin, and Rose reciting devilish text from Paganini’s own letters. The CD is long out of print but you can hear the entire 57 minutes of this glorious creation on an old episode of Pome Pome Tones here.

10cc — I’m Not In Love 1975 Disco Purrfection Version

12-minute remix version of a favorite song from my early childhood — unbelievably smooth mix by DJ Disco Cat. Read the comments on the YouTube post for the full mix backstory. Purrfect.

Sun Ra Arkestra — at Victoria Theater, San Francisco California — Aug 3, 2013

I’ve been super fortunate to experience the live Arkestra a handful of times, and this set from 2013 simply floored me. They completely consumed that old ratty theater space with their magical floating power.

Dire Wolves — at Festival of Endless Gratitude, Copenhagen Denmark — Sep 13, 2019

Live DWLVS ! Yeah, I play my own music on my radio show all the time, somebody has to. This is a short rough audience clip — the proper audio of the whole set was released on LP by Feeding Tube / Cardinal Fuzz with a fabulous poster.

Flow & Heady by Dire Wolves Just Exactly Perfect Sisters Band

Copenhagen 2019 was the last time I saw these DWLVS bandmates in person, but we have plans to meet up again at the Milwaukee Psych Fest November 19-20, 2021, unless ya all spreadnecks shut it down.

Chuck Brown and The Junkyard Band — at Wilmer’s Park, Brandywine Maryland — Sep 19, 1989

I grew up in Baltimore and spent a lot of time going to punk and hippie shows in DC (old 9:30, DC space) in the 1980s, but Wilmer’s Park in southern MD was totally the place. All-day and night go-go shows, mini festivals with overnight camping, shows from Hot Tuna, Zero, Allmans, Root Boy Slim (!!!) and some of the best BBQ I’ve eaten, oh man. There was a lot of crossover of punk/funk/crunchy scenes back then, I loved it all. I went to a lot of Trouble Funk gigs, but this was the only time I witnessed the legendary Chuck Brown.

Alice Coltrane — at Palace of Culture, Warsaw Poland — Oct 23, 1987

Harp solo during her appearance at the Jazz Jamboree festival in 1987. Perfect, transportive.

Bardo Pond — What Are Their Names?

Probably the greatest band of the last 30 years covering one of my absolute favorite David Crosby songs, what could be better? I curated this Terrastock festival in Providence RI in 2006 and assembled a CD compilation of some of the performers for a micro release on the label I used operate called Secret Eye. The original features Jerry Garcia, Neil Young, Phil Lesh (what an amazing LP!) and this Bardo version somehow channels that essence in a slow fried perfect hash jar tempo.

[shemakesmusic-uk]

This segment features artists who have submitted their tracks/videos to She Makes Music. If you would like to be featured here then please send an e-mail to shemakesmusic@hotmail.com. We look forward to hearing from you!

Manpreet Kundi

South Asian, UK-based artist Manpreet Kundi is releasing her self-written debut single ‘something’, setting the unique tone for her upcoming EP. Created acoustically at the piano; the song's essence is dreamy, lovelorn, melancholy and raw—dressed up in both dark and sad pop ambiances. something is layered in an emotional and lyrical sense; but at its core, is about "doubting everything you ever were to someone who for a while made you feel the most significant. It is the chaos and sheer sadness in the breakdown of what you had with said person; after they seemingly change their mind and leave you in panicked confusion with little to no explanation." The composition is an enchanted entwine of lingering vocal melodies and evocative instrumental; blending Manpreet’s signature acoustic piano, smooth atmospheric sounds and heavy, slow-tempo drums. "The entire song fell into place very naturally; born of my reflective tendencies and the intense, prolonged emotion I was feeling." Each section develops dynamically, inviting the listener on a journey through tender string arrangements to deep, bassy, hard-hitting sections. Her boyfriend Michael Brooker is the main producer of the track; along with Manpreet directing the nature of fundamental components plus engaging in elements of co-production—yet giving him creative freedom over the project's soundscape. Manpreet casts a glitter-dripping spell of magical, emotive piano and hauntingly mesmeric vocals to move you with the innate rawness and sentiment they carry. Writing music mostly at her piano; she is constantly inspired and liberated by the instrument that ever-propels her dynamic songcraft. Manpreet's heady, slow-tempo and cinematic style is reflective of main musical influence Lana Del Rey; as well as the 80's and 90's Disney movie soundtracks she began singing along to at 3 years old. She also grew up a fan of Taylor Swift, who furthered her love of poignant story-telling and sparklingly melodic lyricisms. She is repeatedly drawn to Lennon Stella's powerful vocal delivery, and unrivalled Frank Sinatra's spellbinding artistry. Listen to ‘something’ below.

300D

Jen Weisberg (former Ruby Pins) and Ben Pearce (former Windhal Flat) met through the Santa Cruz music scene of 2004. They didn’t become friends until a chance meeting on a street corner in Oakland, and they didn’t form 300D until a couple months into the pandemic. Ben Pearce produces Jen Weisberg’s words and vocal melodies. Their sophomore release ‘Grocery Vaping’ follows their December release ‘Valley Riff’. 300D held the Oakland friends together through the pandemic when Jen (a librarian) was enlisted as a disaster service worker, and Ben returned to Santa Cruz to help his family with the childcare gap left by school closures. ‘Grocery Vaping,’ echoes the duo’s musical evolution through swelling strings and words of longing. Listen below.

300D · Grocery Vaping

VIAL

VIAL is an indie punk quartet based out of Minneapolis, Minnesota, made up of Taylor Kraemer, Kate Kanfield, KT Branscom, and Katie Fischer. Their album LOUDMOUTH is here. Building on the band’s indie-punk DNA, it’s equal parts volatile and vulnerable. Producer Henry Stoehr (Slow Pulp) approaches the band’s core tenacity with an open heart, unleashing energy informed by guts, not necessarily genre. The band’s punk rock roots pack plenty of punch while new-wave moments rub elbows with WLW songs that wear roughness on their sleeves. There’s even a carnivalesque intro, reclaiming for VIAL what it means to be ringmaster. After all: in their three-ring circus, there’s no room for clowns. The track we’re focusing on here today is ‘Planet Drool’. The track is an emotional release of anger about our recurring feelings of discomfort in select punk scenes set to a fast-paced punk instrumental. Although named after the fictional universe of the 2005 children’s film The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl, ‘Planet Drool’ is the heaviest VIAL song they’ve yet to write! Listen below.

Chloe Castro

Chloe Castro has released her first single, 'FUTURE', since her debut EP AMID. Following a childhood spent living between France, Brazil and Wales, Chloe Castro relocated to the North East of England where she began writing songs aged 11. In 2016, half-Brazillian/half-British Chloe battled it out on National Television making it to the quarter finals of BBC One's The Voice UK. Having been recognized for her hypnotic voice, depth and lyrical prowess after her successful television debut, Chloe dedicated the next few years to honing her skills and building her repertoire in a studio in her spare bedroom with producer and co-writer Jake Karno. Inspired by artists including PARTYNEXTDOOR, Bryson Tiller and Frank Ocean, UK based R&B/Trapsoul artist Chloe Castro delicately blends together R&B and Soulful tones with Trap and elements of rap to create a sound that is uniquely her. 'FUTURE’ sees Chloe deliver a dark, sassy and powerful 'I don’t care if we break-up' song promoting independence and self-worth with straight to the point lyrics and emotive vocals. ‘FUTURE’ touches on the vulnerability of being in love and the frustration of feeling underestimated. It pairs that with a self-assured “fuck-you” attitude to create an anthemic vibe for summer 2021. As Chloe describes ‘FUTURE’: “Future is my way of saying let me do me, I know what’s best for me. Like feeling underestimated by someone but knowing your worth and not caring what anyone thinks, even someone you love.” Listen below.

Chloe Castro · FUTURE

[jflashandclash]

Tales from Mount Othrys

Alabaster: Delicate Dance of Chance IV

 Alabaster found Pax in Camp Othrys, hiding with the laundry bins. There were few places Axel couldn’t smell his little brother out. This laundry room was one of them. A logical choice if Pax wanted to avoid being found. Alabaster almost forfeited his plan at the reek of towels soaked in demigod sweat and monster ooze—all cottony causalities from that morning’s training session.

One blanket trembled in the far corner of the room. Judging from its lack of filth, Pax, fortunately, must have swiped it from a clean pile. The blanket went still when Alabaster stepped alongside of it.

He hoped he hadn’t mistaken his friend for two demigods getting intimate. No. The sheet tucked tight enough to show Pax’s form: his legs curled up and arms folded atop them, looking like the grumpiest B-rate ghost. Alabaster nudged dirty towels away with his foot and settled down beside the blanket.

Alabaster lifted the small paperback from his stack of two books. The cover had a few stains and was a little too dingy for Alabaster to have kept in a library if he was a librarian. He cracked it open. The coarseness of the pages felt wonderful, even if he didn’t prefer the first page’s sketch of a baby. At an utter, a reading rune glowed on his necklace, bringing the font to proper focus.

“Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much,” Alabaster read, “They were the last people you’d expect to be involved in anything strange or mysterious, because they just didn’t hold with such nonsense.”

The blanket ghost stopped shaking and sniffling. Alabaster paused in his oration, as though about to turn a page—a ridiculous notion. What book had a page turn after one short paragraph? He berated himself, forgetting the beautiful opening of, It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness… The best example of a necessary run-on sentence. Regardless of A Tale of Two Cities, Alabaster had paused here so Pax could comment.

“Is—is that Harry Potter?” Pax squeaked.

Instead of answering, Alabaster continued to read, past the turn of a page, until he came upon the sentence, “It was on the corner of the street that he noticed the first sign of something peculiar—a cat reading a map.” [1]

Alabaster hadn’t meant to stop there. His breath choked. Sphinx, Lelly’s late cat, had been able to read maps. A brilliant Mist form, she’d been able to do so much more than that: a utilitarian helper in the lab and a compassionate friend to his little sister.

For the first time since he, Pax, and Axel had almost been captured by Romans, Alabaster pressed a hand over his mouth. His eyes felt warm. Every time he’d let Lou Ellen cry in his arms, he’d kept focused on his hatred of the Romans and on their own undiscovered traitor. Why, now, with this stupid, juvenile book, did he find himself choking up over the loss? Over a cat that could read a map?

Pax misunderstood his silence as another page break. “You… You said you would only read me books for educational purposes. And, and that Harry Potter was a ‘gross misrepresentation of magic and b-better as a study of plot holes,’” the words came out a rapid jumble of—presumably—snot and hiccups. They were a distracting relief to Alabaster.

“You wanted to read it. No one would read it to you. This is an apology, not for my unrequited feelings, but for the boarish delivery of my response. This is my attempt, over the next seven hours of reading, an hour per evening this week, to prove that nothing needs to change between us, that we can still be friends.”

The sheet ghost crept closer.  “Friends,” Pax echoed, “We’re friends?”

He didn’t even know if we were friends, but was still willing to express his infatuation? Alabaster growled. Instead of pointing out the error in logic, he said, “Don’t get cocky. It’s not every day that I get a willing lab assistant with no sense of self-preservation.”

The next noise sounded like a choked laugh.

“Is your arm functional?” Alabaster asked, examining the blanket. “Jack never found you to tend to it.”

The ghost extended its limb out without any apparent pain or struggle.

Alabaster sighed in relief as Pax lowered his arm back down. He tapped two fingers on the edge of the book. This will be fine, he assured. Nothing needs to change. All he needed was the affirmation from Pax. “Are my terms acceptable to you?”

Pax laughed. The chime was more genuine. “You don’t have a lot of practice apologizing, do you?”

“Ajax.”

The sheet ghost rested its head against Alabaster’s thigh. After a pause, Pax squirmed further into his lap. Something familial, Alabaster decided. He wouldn’t know. He didn’t grow up with any of his half-siblings and his grandparents hadn’t been touchy. In his fatherly charades, Jack often let Pax curl up on his lap. Axel spent plenty of time shoving Pax off him when Pax was sleepy and wanted a nap.

“Will you read it in a British accent?” Pax asked, poking the book’s binding.

Six to seven hours of reading in a fake British accent? Alabaster weighed his options. He could double check to assure there was no recording equipment in the room, though he doubted Pax would press their fragile friendship with such antics. “…yes.”

“Will you make Ron’s voice higher in pitch?”

“Shut up and let me read to you.” Alabaster found where he left off and pressed his lips at the cat reading a map. He continued, lilting his words in what he hoped was a British accent. He never had the ease with accents that the Pax brothers did.

Pax didn’t complain. His breathing eased by the time Alabaster finished the next page.

At the end of the third chapter, Alabaster decided he would send Pax to bed with the other book in hand, the one for Axel (who had better not ask Alabaster to read to him). That was the other half of his plan. That book had a passage marked with a simple question, “Who is John Galt to you?” The question and passage should be subtle enough. They would strike conversations with Axel about tyranny and freewill without rousing suspicion from others. Then…

Alabaster scowled.

What would happen? What would happen if their talk of evil tyranny led to discussions of overthrowing Luke? The three of them, Pax, Axel, and he, worked well together in a stressful situation. The crowds took well to them when they were on stage. Alabaster was irritated to think a name like the Triple A Chimera (Pax didn’t even go by his first “a” name) could be useful, let alone a symbol for change, but what if it could? A symbol for liberation through insurrection.

He needed to reflect on this with his mother. Her wisdom was years beyond his own, and she could reveal their different potential futures, one that might involve the “Triple A Chimera” slaying a corrupt titan.

“We work well together. With our skill sets combined, we could make an excellent assassination team,” Alabaster muttered.

“Um… Uncle Vernon started to assassinate wizards?” Pax asked. He pulled the sheet partially off and rolled to stare up at Alabaster. His eyes were wide.

Alabaster hadn’t meant to speak aloud. “No—well—we don’t know yet. He might, judging off their insistence to break into his house.”

“But, the wizards could just magic him to pieces, right?”

“No. No, bullets work quite effectively against wizards.” Though, less so against brats with the Achilles’ curse. Luke’s weak spot was under his arm, where Axel had hefted him out of the River Styx. Kelly and Jack were the only two that Luke would let close enough to touch him there. And, Kelly would immediately rat Alabaster out if he suggested killing Kronos after the war.

What about poison? Could you kill a cursed of Achilles from the inside?

Pax pulled the sheet the rest of the way off. His amber and black eyes were so startled, they might roll out of their sockets. “Are you thinking about assassinating wizards?” With the sheet off and his sleeves rolled up, Alabaster could see bruises along Pax’s arm. The injury must have hurt more than he let on.

Alabaster sighed.

Pax wasn’t ready to talk about this sort of thing. Although the child of Eris held it together against the Romans, Alabaster noted how Pax tried not to kill anyone. Besides, right now, Alabaster was supposed to focus on being nice to Pax, not using him as a tool in this cosmic power struggle.

Alabaster removed a blank spell card from his stash and placed it between the pages as a bookmarker. “What you don’t realize Pax, is, after the events of the book series, and after he went mad with power, that I killed Harry Potter.”

Pax’s jaw dropped open at the thought. “That is a fanficiton I would read.”

“I’m sure you would. I forbid you from having Jack compose a ballad about it. [2] Come on. Let’s get you back to your tent. I have something I need to give to Axel.”

As they made their way back through camp, others were trickling in from the party. From what Alabaster heard, buses had been rented (in place of giant-carting death traps like Alabaster had to take). Some were loud with revelry; others were quiet with subtle glances tender touches, all hinting at future intimacy.  

Pax didn’t speak as they walked. Under typical circumstances, Alabaster would have prayed for this. Faced with the silence, only occasionally alleviated by passing partiers, tension dug Alabaster’s fingers into his library books. Would the lab be like this in the upcoming weeks? Awkwardly quiet? Pax’s chatter and excitement made for soothing white noise. “Not that I’m regretting the ability to think without interruption, but are you alright?” he asked.

Pax’s jammed his hands into his punk jacket, toying with something in his left pocket. Alabaster knew it was probably one of those apples—the ones Pax’s mother gave him each morning to turn into someone else. “Just thinking.”

A warm breeze slithered through camp and Alabaster realized how exhausted he was. Emotional stress was tiring. He cleared his throat. “Ajax—”

“Matthias and I were talking about sneaking into the girl’s bath house again. He perfectly measured the amount of water you need to fill a balloon to simulate a realistically filled bra, and I think he makes a lovely lady when he raises his voice a few octaves,” Pax spoke quickly and adverted his gaze. This mustn’t have been what he wanted to talk about.

Another sigh choked in Alabaster’s throat. “Wait—you’re not thinking about turning into one of the girls, are you?! Ajax, that’s absolutely unethical—”

“What? No!” Pax cried. “I would not! Then, I couldn’t prove that my hair can be tamed by no amount of conditioner! Lucille thinks I just don’t use enough.”

“Prometheus and I should place a bet on how quickly you’ll be kicked out.” Alabaster shook his head. “I forbid Lou Ellen from helping you in any way, shape, or form and I certainly hope you haven’t discovered a new gift of magic, only to debut it with something so juvenile.”

“Hey!” Pax protested, “Mercedes would agree: if Matthias and I do a security test on the girl’s bath house and find it wanting, then we’ve done a favor in pointing out its weakness.”

“I’m not even the one you’re spying on and I get catharsis at the thought of your comeuppance.”

They neared the Pax brothers’ tent.

Alabaster debated whether he should give Mercedes a warning about their plan or if she’d find that insulting to her skills as an intelligence gatherer. If the Nord was strapping on a bosom and a wig and walking in the front, then it would probably be the latter.

Still, he was obligated to ask, “You haven’t found an alternative non-magic route to become invisible or a woman—”

Pax withdrew the golden apple from his pocket and nipped it.

Nothing happened, which was peculiar. Eris’ apples of mischief were never duds. Godly item only malfunctioned by intentional design. Usually, Pax turned into someone when he ate his apples, something Mercedes was thrilled to use for spy missions and something she’d only allowed Pax to tell Alabaster, Lou Ellen, Jack, and Flynn. (Alabaster suspected Mercedes’ fear—that Luke would abuse this to see Annabeth sooner, even if it wasn’t really her.)

The longer Alabaster examined Pax, the more he noticed subtleties: Pax’s jaw line softened, his shoulders looked slimmer, something far less subtle about his curvature—

“It worked!” Pax laughed, grabbing at his—no—no—her—chest and lifting. “Oh my gods—Alabaster—they dance! You put your right tit in, you put your right tit out, you put your right tit in and you shake it all about—ow.”

Alabaster shrieked and jumped backwards.

Pax, didn’t seem to notice. He—she was too busy turning to do the Hokey Pokey and giggling. “Oo! Ow, okay. Gentle with the titties. I’ll have to name them. Huh, weird that I never thought to name them before—”

“Ajax!” Alabaster repeated in horror. He was at such a loss for logical words, he resorted to profanities. “What the fuck?!”

Alabaster’s heartbeat pounded so loud in his head that he couldn’t think. He adverted his gaze to the ground. His face felt like it was on fire. Panic, it dawned, I’m panicking more than I did during Rome’s attack.

A bloodcurdling comment came from the tent as someone stepped out.

“Ajax! I’m glad you’re….” The word “back” died on Axel’s lips. “You’re a girl.”

Alabaster looked at Axel, keeping one hand firmly between his eyes and where Pax was dancing. He assumed Axel would be staring at his little brother with the same shock Alabaster felt. Instead, Axel scowled at Alabaster with the intent of a crouching jaguar. “Torrington.” Threat and accusation rolled out with the growl. Tension made the muscles in Axel’s neck strain.

Alabaster’s jaw dropped. “It—it wasn’t me!”

“It had better not have been.”

The movement behind Alabaster’s hand minimized. “Am…. Am I not allowed to be a girl?” Pax’s question was quiet and insecure.

Axel’s response was immediate. From his lack of surprise or hesitation, Alabaster wondered if Axel had been expecting this for years. “You can be whatever you want.” Axel gently ruffled Pax’s unruly hair. Alabaster lowered his hand to watch the interaction, to see Pax’s fragile smile at her brother’s approval.

Seeing Pax like this troubled Alabaster, striking some uncanny valley in the approximation to his friend. All the other times Pax had shifted around Alabaster, it had been into completely different people (pretending to be Jason Grace or Luke Castellan) or completely different species (mostly weasels since Lou Ellen struggled to turn people into much else). The scientific and magic-loving part of Alabaster’s brain should have found this fascinating—could Pax alter individual features about himself? Maybe give himself freckles, change his hair, skin, or eye color, or have a pincer in place of a hand? Why did he feel uncomfortable instead?

Axel had continued to speak, “As long as you want to be one and aren’t doing it for someone else.”

Pax tilted her head, spilling her hair off to the side. “Why would I do it for someone else?”

Axel glared at Alabaster again. Word must have spread about why Pax ran from the dance. With the ordering of events, the potential problem was obvious, though Alabaster had hoped that Axel would think better of him. “Oh, for Kronos’ sake!” he hissed. “Axel—I—he just did this! I didn’t ask him to.”

Axel finally broke eye contact to glance at Pax’s continued dancing. “Ajax,” he sighed, “What did we talk about with touching yourself in public?”

“That it’s inappropriate—oh!” Pax dropped her chest. She made quite the buxom lady and it furthered Alabaster’s discomfort. “My chest is inappropriate now… Man, that doesn’t seem fair for girls. I get why Lucille says it’s sexist bullshit. The titties should fly free—”

“Ajax!” both Alabaster and Axel snapped.

“Sorry. I normally can’t touch myself when I turn into other people because, uh, I turned into someone else, that’s their body, and that would be creepy—”

“At least you have some moral sense,” Alabaster muttered.

“But, I’m just me right now—”

“You’re just you in public,” Axel said, “And, you’re my sibling. Don’t do that in front of me. Or anyone for that matter.” Whatever Axel had predicted about this situation, Pax’s unorthodox dancing hadn’t been part of it.[3] “And don’t think Flynn is going to let us off dawn training just because there was a party in our honor.” Despite Axel’s suspicion of Alabaster, he flashed both of them a smile that might have been… cocky? Proud?

This party had been for them. Although they assuredly would have died without Jack and Flynn’s rescue, Jack happily spun the tale as an exclusively victory for the Triple A Chimera. They had worked well together, with Pax’s expert surveillance granting the opportunity to prepare, Axel’s mastery of terror and tactic, and Alabaster’s magical subterfuge. The books in Alabaster’s hands felt heavy. He withdrew the one thick enough to glaze the eyes of the feeble and handed it to Axel.

“Some light philosophy for meditation.” Alabaster hoped his voice sounded metered and not high with residual panic. “If you grow bored with the length, I marked the chapter that best encapsulates the theory. Well, the primary one of discussion.” Axel was smart, but could grow tired of things he found meandering. Worry made Alabaster swallow. What if Axel mistook the recommendation as idle chatter? What if he understood and reported him to Mercedes? Or worse, Luke himself?

Alabaster visualized Axel’s rigid posture as he stood between Luke and Annabeth’s door. There were details Luke had surely missed: the way Alabaster prepped a spell, the way Mercedes reached for darts that she kept pinned under her shirt, the accumulation of Axel’s energy as he prepped a jaguar transformation. In that room, Alabaster learned these were people who would fight for what was ethically correct, even to defend an enemy, even against a titan.

All of them were probably afraid of the same thing: expressing that their leader had lost his mind. Maybe, Axel needed a nudge in the form of a book.

Axel took it and frowned at the cover. “Atlas shrugged?” he read aloud, “That’s a little tasteless considering what happened to the General on Mount Tam.”

Alabaster smirked. He’d never liked Atlas much in the first place. “I’m glad we’re all alive. Good night, Axel.” He nodded his head and turned to Pax. In the moment, he’d forgotten Pax wasn’t his typical self.

She threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly, making it ever more apparent how differently she was shaped. “Thanks for staying my friend,” she whispered into his shirt.

Alabaster’s face felt hot. Although he hated the word, he could find no better adjective to address the situation other than, “This is weird.”

“Yea, this is weird.” Axel grumbled. Alabaster could hear his eye roll. “But turning us into weasels and polecats? Completely normal.”

“That is normal!” Alabaster snapped. My normal. One of Pax’s swirling black hairs had slid against his chin and he blew it away. The indents of her face felt warm as she burrowed against his chest. A puff of mint—Pax must have been chewing gum—flooded Alabaster’s senses, sending them into hyper-awareness.

Alabaster gently put a hand on either of Pax’s shoulders and removed her. Holding Pax a foot away, Alabaster flashed back to the first time they’d met. “Can you really do magic?” she’d asked, tugging at his sleeve and batting her lashes. He thought Pax was a girl, then, and been humiliated upon finding his mistake. What made someone a boy or a girl? Belief? And if it was belief, and not biological presets, what did that belief entail?  

He cleared his throat. Her amber and black eyes were wide, a little afraid, and Alabaster slipped his grip from her shoulders, hoping they hadn’t been there for an inappropriate amount of time.

“Are you okay?” Pax asked. “Do you need another hug? Prometheus approved: he says my hugs are cure alls.”

“No,” Alabaster said quickly. In attempt to make the denial seem less desperate, he added, “No, I think the only person who might be able to claim panacea hugs is Apollo.”

“And no one should hug that creep,” Pax said. From the way she glanced off in the distance, Alabaster wondered if that was data in Jack’s seminar: What To Do When Pursued By a God and You Can’t Turn into a Tree. “But… are you okay? You’ve been acting funny since…” Her eyes widened. She glanced down at her curves, then back up at Alabaster. Her lips quirked into a half-smirk.

Horror clogged Alabaster’s throat. Pax knew. Alabaster wasn’t exactly sure what elusive information Pax knew, but she did, and Alabaster had to leave before she used it against him.

“You—you think I’m hot! You’re—you’re just straight—!”

There was no viable response to either of those comments. Disagreement would make him sound cruel and any compliment would require Alabaster to (both) lock himself in his lab in a vow of humiliated solitude and hide from Axel for that eternity.

Axel scowled critically at Alabaster’s pause.

This. This is what would be different if Pax was Axel’s little sister instead of little brother. Axel would have an excuse to hunt Alabaster down on unwarranted suspicions and make a sign out of his lanky frame that read, Reasons Not to Hit on My Little Sister.

With nothing else to say, Alabaster nodded to Axel. He hoped that he had managed a calm exterior: his thoughts were uselessly incoherent. His voice sounded shrill. “That’s on loan from the local library and is due in 21 days. I expect it returned to me on time and in prime condition. I hope both of you sleep well.”

Before Pax could respond further, Alabaster rigidly turned and strode away. Although the night had taken on a chill, Alabaster wiped a line of sweat from his forehead.

Stupid. Trivial. Distracting.  

He harnessed his focus, tuning out the unnecessary emotions. This was something he was more accustomed to doing with shame, shutting out his grandfather’s and house servants comments about, “Witch,” and “bastard child.” It was harder with this current emotion—whatever it was that made his heart thud.

He grasped at the other thoughts drifting on his consciousness: Sleep. Axel’s nightmares. Recognizing the Pax brothers as his friends. The three of them making an excellent team. Potential for assassinations. Luke’s increasing failures as a leader. How to lead an army without their golden boy mascot.

They couldn’t. Alabaster swallowed. The chilly air cleared his head. They needed Luke for the rest of the war effort. Disposing of him now would create a rift in Camp Othrys, one that they couldn’t afford. Alabaster knew some of his siblings wouldn’t follow him if a divide happens. If something happened to Kronos, the titans would split into opposing parties. Lamia and any children of Hecate that opposed Alabaster would surely fall on that other side. They didn’t have a replacement leader strong enough to lead the war, other than… who? Flynn?

Alabaster’s stomach churned. Axel was popular, but an outsider. None of the Titans, xenophobic by Hellanistic nature, would listen to him, other than, maybe, Prometheus. Flynn, thanks the roll of luck, had no interest in being a leader. That kind of power vacuum would likely lead Krios and Hyperion to sibling rivalry.

They would have to dispose of Luke after the war. They would need a plan to dispose of Luke after the war, assuming Axel and Pax would agree.

An idea slithered along the seams of Alabaster’s awareness, one involving the murky silhouettes of a lion, a snake, and a ram. Maybe Alabaster could rid Axel of his nightmares at the same time as making a weapon to defeat Luke. The Triple A Chimera…

Magic couldn’t save his dying father, but maybe it could save the world from the return of an ancient tyranny. With thoughts of this new death machine, Alabaster walked back towards his room, blissfully unaware that—for the next week—he’d spend an hour every night reading to a curvaceous, flirty female Pax.

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Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed! (Sorry for falling off the face of the earth again >>’‘‘) I rewrote this ending, like, three times XD I hope it worked! Stay tuned in two weeks (hopefully >>’‘ in the theoretical universe) where a certain maniac redhead finds himself on an island with a population of two. Love you guys. Thanks for your support! <3

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footnotes: 

[1] When everyone stopped reading Tales from Mount Othrys, to pick up on a much more nostalgic work XD If it is not obvious enough, I do not have any rights to this book. There are not enough weasels or evil parents for me to have written it.

[2] Maybe, guys. I’ll consider it XD

[3] Pax’s playing the part of Captain Cook and the Isles of the Titties. Don’t ask questions.