#speaking of energy use: it took a lot to write this post!
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funnuraba · 5 months ago
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ME/CFS symptoms part 2: The Fatigue
Hey, have you guys noticed how everyone is tired recently? Like, everybody you know is exhausted, and so are you, and so is everyone on the internet and in real life, and nobody's getting better, and sleep and rest don't help?
In addition, are you having new symptoms like tingling hands and feet? Dizziness or lightheadedness? Restless legs? Digestive problems? Slow thinking? Word confusion? Tinnitus or other hearing loss? Vision loss? Stomach problems? Sinus issues? Sleep disturbance or change? Soreness? New, worsening or changing migraines? Heart palpitations? New sensitivity to the weather? Joint pain? New chronic pain spots? Dark patches on your torso? Hair loss? New incontinence at an unusual age without having had children? Do you feel like you have the flu after heavy exertion?
Yeah I was having a lot of that myself. Turns out it was Long Covid, the Myalgic Encephalomyelitis/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome type, which makes up 50% of all Long Covid cases. I can't sugarcoat this: if you have this, you are fucked to some degree. You have to reduce the amount of energy you use or you'll degenerate further into actual living hell. That means no stimulants, no pushing through it, no exercise at all, period, no I'm not joking, exercise makes you worse with this condition.
And not just physical exertion, but mental exertion. The energy it takes to put things into words, to look at screens or movement on screens, to digest food. All of that is way more than you think. You need to figure out your new limits, because aggressive rest is the only way you stand a chance of staying in the Mild stage. This may mean ending your social life, ending travel, working from home, quitting your job. If you don't do it, you'll wish you had.
Aggressive rest means staying in bed a lot. Doing nothing. At least an hour a day of literally nothing: you lie there with earplugs in and an eye mask on. It's gonna be awful. But I'm not exaggerating: Moderate ME/CFS is hell on earth, and there are two stages after that: Severe and Very Severe. Your body physically can't restore energy in a normal way anymore. If it runs out, you'll get Post Exertional Malaise, and if you get too much of that you "crash".
A crash keeps you from doing anything. You won't be able to process sound or light, you probably won't be able to get out of bed. You may not be able to sit up. You might struggle to breathe. You may get out of the crash in a day, in a week, in months--or never. Every single crash has the potential to become a permanent loss of function. People have lost the ability to digest food and the muscular strength it takes to breathe. There are people who do nothing but lie in the dark all day, unable to tolerate light or sound, being fed through a tube port by a caretaker who has to hurry out of the room because the physical presence of another human being is too painful. And those are the lucky ones who have non-abusive caretakers; almost no doctors or professional carers believe in this disease or are equipped to treat someone who has it. You can be legally tortured in the hospital if you go in for a procedure and the doctors think you're lying about what hurts you.
If it sounds like I'm trying to scare you? Yes. I am. I spent six months toward the lower end of Moderate ME. Hell is real. You will pray for death. You will not be physically able to kill yourself. This is why all those annoying disabled people keep screeching about wearing respirators to prevent Covid spread, because your odds of getting this go up with every infection, vaxxed or not, and many people already have it. They don't know yet. And they're pushing their way past their late chance to mitigate their descent into, I am not exaggerating, hell itself. You will want to fucking die if you get to a certain stage of this condition. ME/CFS patients have a high suicide rate and report a quality of life lower than end-stage cancer and AIDS patients.
So, again, are you tired all the time lately? Do you know someone who is? Look up the symptoms of ME/CFS and be very, very careful. And wear a fucking respirator in public spaces. All the time. No taking it off for selfies or indoor eating. You people are killing yourselves and everyone else for an illusion of normality that is never ever coming back.
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lactoseintolerentswag · 1 year ago
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Rise Characterizations
Last month I did an in-depth re-watch of rottmnt s1 to take some notes on writing the characters of rise from their perspective and such. Figured I'd share what I found, but I'm also posting this bc my docs have a nasty habit of blipping out of existence.
We'll start with Raph bc he's the oldest of course, but I'll post the others sep. bc this is gonna get long!!
Raph Character Notes
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Language Habits:
Catchphrases: "like a boss", "smash"
Verbalizes his attacks such as "smash", "knuckle sandwich", "power smash jitsu", "tonfa power jitsu", "mystic punch jitsu"
Uses older song titles for surprised exclamations or in place of cursing, most notably "jumping jack flash!"
Uses aave/bae, For example: 'em instead of them, 'ey instead of they, 'cause instead of because, forgoes the g in ing words (going becomes goin')
Uses less and less grammar the more he's stressed, and his voice will come to a higher pitch
Will speak in a softer tone to his little brothers if he's concerned about hurting their feelings. Aka babying them
Mixes up both metaphors and idioms. Would be one to say how the turn tables unironically
Does say "hero" a lot, lost count, especially in phrases like "hero town"
Refers to his brothers as "boys" or "fellas"
Refers to Splinter as "pop(s)" most often
Refers to strangers he's directly talking to as "bubs" or "hoss"
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Personality:
Protective of his family
Plays up the hero act/has a strong sense of duty and justice
Impatient, rushes in without a plan (pre-movie), doesn't finish books until the end, falls asleep during "boring movies"
Oblivious, doesn't read into things beyond surface level. Struggles with empathy when something is beyond his understanding, but is still very emotional
Center of responsibility for his brothers, but also has a reckless sense of fun. As long as it's him doing the stupid unsafe thing it's fine
Carries the weight, in a literal sense he piggy backs his brothers, but will also use his body as a shield from danger. Unfortunately this also means he takes his brothers a little less seriously (Mikey the most common victim), and will try and either protect them from everything or as an oldest sibling everything has go "his way"
Doesn't do well in solitude. Needs to be looking after people to feel functional, and needs to be around people to feel safe
Clumsy, "takes horrible pictures", isn't very good at hiding, he's a big guy so it probably took a lot of time to find balance
A sweet guy who still won't shy from making fun of his family. Leo tends to be the brunt of his teasing since he is the most annoying, but he will also poke Donnie on his dramatics
Likes cute things!!! Has a teddy bear collection and loves animals. It's so cool how this isn't played off as a joke and he's still just as masculine for liking pink and cutesy stuff
Likes fighting!!! Gets a lot of energy out defeating bad guys (where he directs his anger towards), the one who is shown to train the most, and also weight lifts in his spare time
Doesn't do well under pressure, here the anger comes out the most. He gets stressed when it's all on him, especially since he tends to mess up the most in these moments
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Miscellaneous:
Second to unlock mystic powers
Nicknames/codenames: "raph-a-doodle" by leo, "red rover" by april, "red king" by donnie
Teddy bear names: Doctor Huggenstein, Captain Snuggles, Cheech
Stinks: fear stink, amazement stink, sneaking up on people stink, victory stink
Seems to be less afraid of rabbits and more afraid of puppets
Went on his first solo mission at 13
Cannot lift a bus, at age 15
Thought about discussing fighting style, but I'm not as familiar with that concept and I've seen a couple posts dissecting such topic. So we'll end here for now. Hope this was helpful!!! I'll post the rest of the boys later and link here
Leo is up!!
Donnie is up!!
Mikey is up!!
Splinter is up!!
April is up!!
Cassandra is up!!
Baron Draxum is up!!
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marnikula · 6 months ago
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i loved the reader who cant say no trope :') i used to be that way
CAN WE GET READER WHO IS SUPER ASSERTIVE AND HAS A THING FOR SPENCER WHO IS JUST LIKE IN BAMBOOZLES OF READER BEING SO COMFORTABLE SAYING NO AND BEING STRAIGHTFORWARD 🙏🙏
SIMP
I could not think of any way to write this well for a few days, so sorry for the late reply. Also, if you are reading this and you made a request, I promise I am getting to it, I've just been a bit swamped with work and writing this post.
Now then, no real warnings except some cringe in the way that reader relentlessly simps after Reid.
✨Enjoy!✨
Your first meeting with Spencer Reid was something he would never be able to forget, even with his eidetic memory. You waltzed up to him after one of his guest lectures with such confidence that he stood to the side, thinking that you would pass by him. But you didn't. You stopped in front of him, speaking words that he would have never had the courage to utter to someone: "Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?"
He remembers seeing the way your friends cringed behind you, the pick up line that left your lips clearly having made them uncomfortable. When he thought that you would move on after seeing the blush spreading all the way from his toes to his ears, thinking that maybe you coming to flirt with him was a dare, but you didn't. Instead, you uttered another sentence that he could feel himself cringe to as well, but you didn't seem to mind, your eyes too filled with determination to be put off by his facial expression at your request. "I lost my phone number, can I have yours?" He genuinely thought you were joking, but then you held out your phone to him.
In a stupor of confusion, Spencer entered his contact details, waiting for the punchline to come, proving that this truly was some sort of joke. Throughout the whole interaction he was wondering how someone as attractive as you would decide to come up to him of all people and used lines that not even Morgan had the guts to use to try and flirt with him.
It took a few weeks of you consistently sending him pick up lines along with good morning messages and invites to a date before he decided to ask Morgan for advice. It wasn't helpful. His friend had simply laughed in disbelief when told the story and was rendered speechless when he read the messages exchanged between you, most of them from your side. Spencer decided to go for it, after all, what was the worst that could happen, you hit him with another pick up line?
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It was worse, so much worse. When he arrived at the designated spot to find you before going to the movies he was met with a bouquet of red roses with branches of baby's breath spread in between. It was a beautiful arrangement he greatly appreciated, but the fact that you gave it to him the moment he stepped out of his car and into your view, as well as the fact that it was a very public display of affection sent Spencer reeling into a stuttering and blushing mess.
The movie you picked out was a romantic comedy, and although Spencer laughed quite a lot, he could not really enjoy the movie itself, too focused on the fact that you held his hand the moment the two of you sat down. It truly baffled Spencer how you could be so nonchalant about how you approached him, you did things he would not have even imagined in his wildest dreams to have the confidence to do.
At dinner, you decided to take him to your favorite restaurant. It was a quaint Italian place a few blocks down from the movie theater. The whole walk there you were full of energy, talking to him and listening to him spew random facts about things that happened in the movie. Your eyes held such pure adoration he wondered if he might have hung the stars in the sky without even realizing it.
______________________________________________________________
Spencer enjoyed his evening with you more than he ever had with anyone else he had gone out with before. As he lay in bed, thinking about the kiss you planted solidly on his cheek after he dropped you off at your apartment he wondered again how it was possible for someone so bright and confident to be as interested in him as you were.
As he drifted off to sleep, Reid wondered where this unfolding relationship with you would take him, and he could truly say that he was excited to see what would happen.
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bluishfrog · 5 months ago
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tl;dr: please, please interact with your local fanartists
Since my dash is talking about artists and ex-artists, I thought it would be not the worst moment to encourage people to engage with fancreations more!
I obviously cannot speak for ex-artists (and there are very clearly many different issues depending on the situation that have absolutely nothing to do with what I am talking about), but I could imagine that maybe some of them would be less resentful of this fandom, if they felt more like an appreciated part of this community, and instead of dedicating time and energy to keep up with something they no longer like, they could have left quietly with fond memories.
I consider myself very lucky since despite being fairly new on dtblr, I have a few lovely blogs who regularly leave encouraging comments in my tags, but I see so many art works without any 'personal' tags (as opposed to 'category tags' that people use to navigate their blog) or any comments in any other form.
So let's make sure that the many artists of this community - and especially the smaller ones - have a good experience! :D
Here some ideas (the list is in no way exhaustive) on how to show love to your local artists:
leave personalized comments in the tags: you can point out what you like about it, maybe comment on a small detail you noticed, compliment the drawing style, etc. (small trick: if I don't feel up to add personalized tags, I put the post in my drafts and then add the tags later!)
send them a message in their askbox - you can even stay on anon if you are more comfortable like that! If you want to reference a specific artwork, you can add the link or include the title / description
you can tag people you think would enjoy the art piece - show off your favorite works
if you have something longer in mind, you can even make your own post and tag the artist themselves to ensure they see your post
write something based on your favorite art - no matter how long or short
draw something inspired by an artist you enjoy - and you definitely don't have to be an experienced artist for that. It's so much fun to inspire each other!
Same goes for our wonderful writers: leave a comment, gush about your favorite quote, ramble to them in their ask box, draw fanart for their work - let them know that you appreciate their creations and that you took the time to interact with it.
At the end of the day, we are all here because we want to enjoy something together. And some of us like to do that by creating our own little works inspired by that common interest. And as online communities tend to do, it is quite often the case that negative attention is a lot louder than positive attention. And it can feel rather lonely at times.
It makes all the difference when you feel like your works are loved and cherished :)
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blueteller · 3 months ago
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Hello, Blueteller-nim! I just want to ask what's happening rn in tcf part 2? Who are the new gods that have been introduced (and how many of those newly introduced gods became Cale's enemies)? How many hunters Cale already defeated (and how many more should he defeat)? Is there any news about the Fake Hilsman? Did Cale adopted a new kid? (Pls say yes I want him to adopt more lol)
Hi! I believe this exact question was sent to me before? Sorry it took me so long to reply! Every time I started writing, new lore got dropped and I ended up re-writing this reply from scratch. There's a lot to cover, so brace yourself for tons of SPOILERS
I made a post about TCF gods once already, but turns out, parts of it are outdated! Some new information got revealed that directly contradicts my old assumptions about several of them. But we'll get to it.
First of all, the Hunter families. The plot of Part 2 so far consists of Cale going to different dimensions to deal with them.
So there were originally seven, but by current time there were only five left to deal with. Let's quickly run by each of them one by one.
Black Bloods; residents of the planet Xiaolen – specifically Xiaolen 1 – named Huayans (Fayence in the first raw translations, just in case you've seen that version before), led by Redok. They were human Black Mages who specialized in "White Magic", meaning their variant of Black Magic was more powerful and it looked white. Pretty neat. They flooded Xiaolen with dead mana in order to sacrifice the world and gather its energy called "Karma". Still little detail on how Karma works exactly, but we know it can be gathered by either killing or saving tons of people – guess which method the Hunters use. Cale got a dramatic fire power boost because of some universal balance rules, and defeated them pretty easily. (Xiaolen citizens made Cale a statue in his honor, much to his despair lol)
Blue Bloods; residents of Central Plains, a pretty young world from what we know. They were known as the Blood Cult, lead by a female leader called Blood Demon. They created hundreds of thousands of zombies called Jiangshi and planned to cause a 3-way civil war in order to do the same thing Black Bloods were trying to do. Cale got a water power upgrade because of a dead Dragon and defeated a tsunami with a tsunami and got a splitting headache because of some third eye mumbo jumbo – long story. They were a little harder to defeat than Black Bloods, but they managed in the end. Choi Han got to personally slay the Blood Demon. (Central Plains citizens turned Cale into a folk story/legend and apparently there's already a cult for him hahaha)
Purple Bloods; resident of Aipotu – who consists entirely of Dragons and Dragon-bloods, led by Dragon Lord Neo (yes I'm pretty sure the name is a Matrix reference – love the irony of it so much). Purple Blood's specialty was getting to "inheriting" Dragon powers via some very questionable blood transfusions and heart transplants. Nasty stuff. Neo's Attribute was time, or something quite similar to it, and he used his time powers to mess up Aipotu and the World Tree, intending to transfer himself and all his followers/slaves into a Virtual Reality the Hunters planned to make their own new world. Cale had to use Instant to defeat Neo, turning his own broken plate into dust and eating it to survive (VERY questionable method, Cale!!). Dragon Half-Blood also had to sacrifice himself so Cale set him up as an NPC in the Virtual World and he gets to be reborn from an egg as a legit Half-Dragon named Eden Miru. These has been the most recent events in the story (also Aipotu residents built Cale a church under Clopeh and named it Five Colored Light religion HAHAHAHA). Speaking of Virtual Reality…
Transparent Bloods; residents of Earth 3 – the world where Anh Roh Man lives, the guy who made Alberu's Taerang; leader unknown so far. Apparently ARM's parents are the one who made the Virtual Reality, and the Hunters bought/stole it (and named it "Raising My Very Own Precious Omnipotent God!"??? Which is just hilarious…) So the game wasn't originally designed by them. That matters a lot, because it seems like not only VR is sentient like every other world so far, it has even created an AI specifically against the Hunters and their influence. It seems that VR is, in fact, a real world, capable of containing real people and their souls. So Cale will definitely be heading there next to save it from Transparent Bloods. But before we get to them…
Five-Colored Bloods; no apparent residence, but I have a suspicion… We found out very recently their leader is called the "Wanderer King". Which just screams to me of the whole "Mercenary King" invented by the White Star – the exact same brand of arrogance, really. Their specialty seems to be collecting and transferring power; that's how Dragon Lord Neo was able to get so much power to influence an entire world and the World Tree. They will be a pain to deal with, because they seem to be allied both with certain gods and demons. Which is why, btw, in the most recent chapters Cale went to the freaking Demon Realm. But more on that in a bit~!
White Bloods; all we know about them is from Choi Jung Gun in Sealed God's Temple Test of Sloth. To directly quote him, "The White Blood family betrayed the Hunters and escaped!" (chapter 730) – which I actually mixed up in the past, my bad; I thought it was the Red Blood family that betrayed them and escaped. Speaking of which:
Red Bloods; also known as Thames, last known member being Jour Thames (or is it Drew Thames in the EAP translation? Whatever, I prefer Jour…) and the "Fake Hilsman" who stole Cale's retirement fund. Judging from Jour mentioning her brother when Cale got the Annual Rings of Life Ancient Power, I think it's safe to assume it's that guy. CJG said to Cale that " The Red Blood family perished a long time ago", but he also said that "The Red Blood did not perish", so I think they also betrayed the Hunters and faked their death.
If you're still with me after ALL of that exposition, let me now actually address the actual question: the gods involved in the plot of in Part 2.
There are 5 gods we must talk about, and why I need the Hunter families context first will become clear in a moment.
God of Balance; apparently female, wears heels, and approaches people from behind for intimidation. I'd call her the "gentle in disposition yet extremely scary" grandma type. Basically forcefully summoned Cale to meet her after defeating the Blue Bloods on Central Plains (Cale did not see her face) and told/threatened Cale that he should become a god. One of the "Five Ancient Gods", which seem to be one of the if not THE oldest Gods around who did not retire yet for some reason. Seems like a real piece of work, though doesn't seem evil? More like a strict law enforced or corrupt politician. She did beat up the God of Death over giving Cale the dimension-transporting mirror Divine Item that one time. She also wrote a rulebook on universal balance, apparently. That's why most of Cales powers were sealed and weakened during the Central Plains arc.
God of Hope; I don't believe their gender was ever specified. I think some people assume she's female too, but I found no evidence for it so far? I might be wrong. Anyway – thanks to them visiting Cale to "scare away" the God of Balance, we got tons of info. The God of Hope said: "Including Balance, Chaos, and I, there are a total of five Ancient Gods. We have continued to protect these seats without ever handing it over to another existence. My my, we are all quite greedy. We all desire power as well." So the five Ancient Gods seem to be Balance, Chaos, Hope, and I think the last two are Fate and Blue Wolf? [EDIT: The last two were revealed to be Justice and Injustice in the most recent chapter. My mistake!] Anyway – the God of Hope is sometimes stronger than Balance and that pisses her off. They seem to be one of the most reasonable gods we've met so far, not only admitting that they did not wish to become a god at all but were forced to, but also sincerely cheering on Cale's dream, explaining that Balance wanted Cale to replace Hope and be her lackey. No thanks, Balance, that's never gonna happen. …I mean Cale might still end up a god, with how things are going, but. Definitely not working for Balance.
Blue Wolf; I'm also unsure if the gender ever got specified, though I got the impression that they're probably male so far? In any case, they showed up during the battle on Aipotu. One of the evil Hunter Dragons tried to summon them with a corrupt Divine Item and Lock ended up swallowing a blue flame (yes it was exactly as weird as it sounds). They seem to be the reason why Beast People are able to control their Berserk Transformations at all? Which is quite interesting. Little to no depth on this god's character so far, though, except for apparently liking Lock and making him a successor of some kind.
God of Chaos; we found out a couple of things about them so far in the Aipotu arc. One, their followers are complete freaks; like, Shou Tucker from Fullmetal Alchemist level of messed up.  Their followers experiment on people AND themselves, like re-sewing limbs and creating chimeras (which explains lots of Hunter experiments honestly). Two, their representatives are able to use some weird similar-to-Dominating-Aura power which involves creepy Eldritch Horror Eyes? And Cale's gonna try and replicate that with the Donating Aura himself?? Well okay then…? Three, that god's power seems to be characterized by grey color (Dragon Lord Neo intended to use grey stuff to kill Aipotu with. Also worth mentioning; Choi Jung Gun apparently got poisoned by it, so now he's unconscious, slowly turning gray and dying. We'll see if Cale finds a way to save him.) Which – plot twist!! Actually came up in Part 1!! Looks like Sky Eating Water herself was subdued by that very god's power?! Together with God of War, no less, which brings us to the final god on the list…
God of War; turns out they're a double agent, if not a triple agent!! It's quite difficult to figure out what their deal is. Before, I kinda assumed they had to have some good intentions, because they helped created shelters and Cotton was their Holy Maiden and stuff. But nope. God of War is either working FOR or WITH the Hunters, although I'm inclined to think the latter. There seems to be something going behind the scenes, some personal agenda we don't know of yet? We know from Part 1 that God of War gave the people of the north a river, which the Sekka family hoarded selfishly for themselves, turning it into a lake. The God of War emptied the lake in retribution and sent a Divine Item that was a watering can full of fury. However – despite apparently all that good stuff and "breaking the slave chains" from Sky Eater Water, they also forced her to work for them as a Judge, which she hated so much she ran off. We now found out in Part 2 that God of War must have wanted to control Sky Eating Water, because she was so powerful she probably could have defeated the Ancient White Star by herself!! So, God of War teamed up with God of Chaos and chained her down in the lake in the Eastern Continent where Cale eventually got the Ancient Power from. A tragic end for her, but shows how merciless God of War was for his very own chosen one, in the end. God of War was also involved in giving Neo the knowledge on how to control Aipotu's power and the World Tree. There seems to be a lot more going on with the God of War we EVER knew, and the fact that the grey color has been set up back when Cale got Sky Eating water is straight up thrilling for me. I can't wait to find out more!!
So we finally covered all the Hunters and all the gods so far – goodness I'm sorry there's so much, but in my defense, that's about 300 chapters of context for it.
I roughly covered what happened so far through the two lists, but I'll add a few more things:
Cale defeated 3 out of 5 Hunter families so far: Black, Blue and Purple (like beating someone up and leaving colored bruises lol), with Transparent and Five Colors left. Also the ever-mysterious Hunter Leader called "The King's Successor", no idea if that's the Wanderer King or not, but I kind of doubt it. We'll see… (I also totally hope Cale kicks the a** of the God of Chaos, because they're a creep and deserve to burn in hell)
There seems to be another faction aside from Hunters & their supporters, or anti-Hunter gods like God of Death and non-affiliated people – there's a group called "Arbitrators" (raw translation, EAP did not get so far yet), which include Demons?? We don't know what their exact deal is yet, they seem to be about specific Divine/Demonic politics maybe? And Cotton is one of them because she turned her back on God of War?? And now Cale is in the Demon Realm, meeting a middle-aged demon princess named Aurora (whose father got dethroned and another guy took his place so Cale's probably gonna dethrone yet another monarch soon), and it turns out that the Arbitrators are totally BROKE, which kinda explains why Fake Hilsman stole Cale's money if he's one of them… Now Cale is scared because they want him to sponsor them HAHAHA – Alberu is gonna love the irony
No Cale did not officially adopt more kids sadly, but there's been some adorable kid characters showing up, and there's DEFINITELY a ton of new loyal Caleism followers – much to Cale's despair, as they're starting to worship him across dimensions… And with the Virtual Reality apparently being able to connect worlds, it's only the matter of time before Cale's slacker life is utterly screwed by multi-dimensional religion starring him as their Lord and Savior LOL
…So anyway, I hope it's what you've been asking for? Thank for reading this freakishly long post about my rambling on Part 2!
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qalijahbydior · 9 months ago
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Mirrors — Tom Blyth x Actress!reader
a/n: happy birthday to the internet's boyfriend!! LOL HE'S 29 already I FEEL SO YOUNG 😔🤌 anyway i decided to write since i had to post something while my story is still being written. newayz enjoy reading!
warnings : none just pure fluff
Tom has been in love with you the moment he heard you speak, it might be not the softest tone or soothing but there's something that draws him into you. He finds you pretty, hilarious, oddly funny and you give off that 'sunshine energy' He feels giddy when talking to you and do you feel the same thing? You do. You just love it when he laughs to your stories and hype your jokes especially when he listens to you. You two have always been teasing each other and that's what makes your friendship go on.
"Tom, come here! Look what I've found!" You say as you carry the ginger kitten and pat it. He came running to you and was already planning to touch the cat but you pulled it away. "Let me guess, you want to adopt it right?" he said, crossing his arms and tilted his head to the side. "Of course I do but the owner of my apartment specifically said no pets." You frowned at the thought of it. You really wanted to adopt the cat even if you just met him. Tom looked at you, scrutinizing your reaction. He then took the cat and rubbed its throat.
"You adopt it but it goes home to me, how does that sound?" He looked at you and the cat lovingly, his words made your face lit up and squeal at excitement. Him volunteering for the cat to live in his house meant having you over so he thought it was a good idea. "What, really? Are you serious?" you say as your eyes fluttered. You didn't think that he'd also like to take care of the cat that you were holding. "Yeah besides I feel like my house can use a pet since I don't have one." He shrugged, still petting the cat. You clung to his arms and hugged it "Yay! I now have a cat!" you squealed again then he looked at you, smiling.
she's so cute i can adopt a lot of cats if her reaction will be like this everytime he thought to himself
"But, I will name him. That's the condition, alright?" his tone was teasing because he knows that you already have a name for the cat. And you gladly let him name the cat, you nodded. "Alright, you name him." and just by a snap of a finger he already has a name for the cat. "His name is Miku, cute right?" he turned to you then smiled.
if loving this cat means getting even closer to you then i will love him and cherish him because he'll always remind me of you he thought as he was looking at your face, like it was illuminating and he loved it.
As for you, you thought that he's so kind to even offer the cat that you were adopting a roof to live in. Tom has always been nice to you and everything you love, you do, and you liked he liked it all too. As if he's now mirroring you. Everything he does is now a reflection of you.
"Nice choice, it is cute." you thought the name was cute but it had a hidden meaning and he knows. Miku is a japanese name and it means 'beautiful sky' it's name matches the way he looks at you. You're the sunshine and now the cat is the beautiful sky.
"I'll put the cat on my dressing room." you gently tried to get the cat from him but he refuses. "Nuuh, I'll hold him for a while. I'm the Dad after all." he said, a smirk creeping on his face. You furrowed your eyebrows and scrunched your nose as a reaction. "Let me hold him, you get to take him home later." you still tried to get Miku for him but he doesn't budge.
"No, I'll hold him first so he can get used to me." he's still pulling the cat away from you and tou seem to figure out a good way to deal with this and it's by distracting him. "Wait, let's buy something for him real quick. There's a pet shop five blocks away from here. We'll be quick we just need to buy uhhh a collar, wet food for kittens and his very own plate." You smiled as you pat Miku.
You and Tom, both carrying the kitten in your arms, went to the pet shop five blocks from your set. You had come to buy everything the kitten needed, and despite some hesitation by the shopkeeper - who warned you this was a lot of responsibility - you were confident that you could do it. The kitten meowed softly as it was carried away from the safety of his littermates and the familiar surroundings of the pet shop, clearly a bit anxious and unsure of what was to come next.
You and Tom carry the kitten back to the set. The kitten is a bit fussy and wants to explore everything, but eventually settles down in Tom's arms. As the kitten falls asleep, you can't help but marvel at just how cute and adorable it is. You have to admit that the pet shop was right, cats are a lot of work. But it's so worth it when the kitten is snuggled up against your chest, purring softly. It makes all the work feel worth it. You took your phone then took a picture of you, Tom and Miku.
you two will make such good cat parents and you know it.
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You're now sitting at Tom's couch, inside his house as you insisted that you come and feed Miku. This day went on so fast a while ago you're contemplating whether to get Miku or just leave him there but you now have him! Tom is also loving Miku as the cat always clings onto him and purrs on his touch. You asked him if you can stay at his house for a while before you go home and he agreed.
"You know what it's starting to look like you're Miku's owner and not me but either way, it seems like he really likes you." you crossed your legs and picked Miku up to put him on your lap and pet him. "We're his owner, babe. Chill. Besides I used to have a cat that's why he seemed to like me." his words warmed your heart and did he just call you babe...? The thought of the two of you owning a cat is so cute and it just fuels your feelings towards him even more.
"Thank you, really, Tom. I appreciate this so much. I love that you also love Miku." you smiled at him as he was setting up Miku's bed. "Anything for you, pretty girl." He looks at you with love in his eyes, and the butterflies on your stomach felt like they're going to explode. You felt blood rushing through your face, feeling flustered. You just bit your lower lip, stopping yourself from smiling and continued to pet Miku.
Tom has always been like this, he compliments you at the most unexpected moments and it just gets you all red and flustered. You love his compliments and he loves giving it to you. He likes seeing you smile, laugh and jolly because seeing you happy makes him happy too. Your enthusiasm is like a virus once he gets to you. And you also love making him happy, that man's happiness is just simple. You don't know how you make him happy but you just do anything anyway.
Your friendship with him has been a rollercoaster ride, it gets crazy the more that it lasts. You wanted to tell him how you feel towards him but It also scared you, the thought of losing your friendship just because of your feelings towards him scared you.
You always fought the urge to tell him how you felt, so instead of telling him you just express it. Physical touch, words of affirmation and acts of service has always been your love language. You liked being near him, you liked clinging onto him like he's going to disappear anytime.
He now sat down beside you and just looked at you as you were playing with Miku. "Y/N" he called and you turned to him, smiling. "Yeah?" his expression softened as he spoke once again. He looked like he was in deep thought before he spoke. "How come you're not dating anyone? I've never seen you go around and date someone?" he asked, he always thought of that but if ever that you really did it would hurt. Just the thought of you dating another guy that isn't him is already piercing his heart.
"I'm not interested. That's it, I'm not looking for anything because I've already got what I need. I can never ask for more." and that's how you really felt through out your friendship with him. You know that he probably doesn't think of your friendship like you two were tied to each other but it always felt that way.
"But do you like someone right now or I don't know, used to like someone?" he knows that this question might be a risk but he still asked it, desperate for an answer. Like his whole feelings depended on it. You didn't know how to answer the question because you were afraid that he might think that he's the one you're talking about. But you're going to make the most out of it
"Well, there's this friend of mine. He really makes me happy. What's for sure is I like him but I can never tell him what I feel. What if my growing feelings ruin our friendship? I enjoy what we have. I feel like I'm already tied to him but not in a bad way, you get me? This friend has been there for me since we met, and lately I've been feeling that I'm seeing myself through him. Not in a selfish way." you explained and that got him thinking of the things that he's done to you or with you these days, trying to connect the dots and see if it would make sense.
And now, it did make sense. He just now realized that he's mirroring you, too. You two are the reflections of each other
"Y/N, it's me isn't it?" he asked, wanting to confirm his thoughts. You looked down and nodded. He was so happy that It was him and you felt the same. He put Miku aside and held both of your hands, he made you face him. His ocean blue eyes looking at you.
"You know why I stuck with you the moment we met? There's like an invisible force pulling me towards you. Your smile, your laugh, your funny antics had got me. It's just so addicting that I found myself always crawling towards you. You're like a ray of sunshine that wherever you go you lighten up everything." he removed his other hand from your grip and caressed the side of your face, and you finding comfort in it. His words made your heart melt even more. You loved him the same as he's the reason why you laugh and smile.
"I never knew that you saw me like that. I now know why you always tease me and make me laugh. To be honest I feel the same, there's a missing part of me whenever you're away from me even just feets away. There's something lacking when you're not there making me laugh and it has been a routine ever since. Your presence and existence completes me." you gave him a sweet smile then looked down at your hands intertwined.
The butterflies on your stomach felt crazy. His hands holding you, his ocean blue eyes fixated on you and love just filling the room felt right and perfect. He looks at you the way he always looks at you all the time, eyes full of admiration and love. You've always tried to shake off that thought when he looks at you thinking that you're just mistaken or seeing things but now it's all clear. He loves you, likes you, adores you like you're the only thing that's meant to be adored.
And you also tried to hide that look in your eyes but now that got you thinking, did he always see right through me?
The moment feels euphoric for Tom, and he can't contain his excitement as he shares his true feelings with you. He has waited for this moment for so long, and finally, it's here. Tom confesses his love for you, and you can sense the genuine and pure emotion behind his words. Seeing your reaction, he feels beyond happy and satisfied that you now know how he feels. He feels like he has accomplished something special, and the sight of your face only makes the whole experience even sweeter.
The vacancy that sat in my heart, is a space that now you hold.
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tia-shay · 8 months ago
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Solar Return Observations 1.0
Hello, I'm so excited to write this post! Today I will provide an overview of my most recent solar return chart and how the year manifested for me.
For extra background, this was my 12th house profection year (ruled by Jupiter) and it was just as messy as the astro girlies predicted. 0/10 would recommend. Due to this being my 12th house protection year, I assumed it would be pretty low-key. But, my Leo ascendant had other plans. Note: these observations were made using Tropical astrology and Placidus house system!
Leo Ascendant at 24 degrees: talk about being in the spotlight. To an uncomfortable degree, the focus really was on me this year. What I could do, what my talents are, and undivided attention. For an introvert like myself, this was superrr uncomfy!! Idk how y'all do it. But this was a year where my creativity was able to shine. I spent a lot of time with kids and nurturing my own inner child.
Taurus Sun in 9th house (conjunct mercury, NN and MC): I started and stopped college this year. Apparently I needed to go back to be reminded of how much I despise it. Much to my dismay, I did little to no traveling this year. But these planets are all in Taurus so perhaps that can make them stationary? Sun conjunct NN made it to where my entire being was exactly what I needed to be. I just needed to stand tall and confident (Leo ASC) in who God created me to be.
Speaking of God, with this being my 12th house protection year, I started going back to church, volunteering my time and resources, and standing stronger in my spirituality. I would have NEVER made it through this year without this!
Aquarius Pluto in 6th house square Taurus Sun: I thought I was gonna d*e like a thousand times when I seen this aspect/placement. Y'all I was scurred, but still I rise! This year was certainly strange. At times it felt as if I was my own worst enemy. Battling inner battles every moment of the day. I joked that each week I was a new person, but honestly, this was the truth. Pluto doesn't let you stay the same. My routine changed a lot this year and I ended up working in a career I have never even considered! I also started posting on social media a lot more and even made a YouTube channel!
Cancer Moon conjunct Cancer Mars in 11th house: this also frightened me. I'm a natal Cap moon so to give me a Cancer moon?! Baby, idk what to do with this...but we made it work! My energy levels were very much dependent on my mood and emotions so that was icky. My relationship with my mother pretty much carried me through this year. In whole signs, this moon is placed in the 12th house which I found very interesting as my mother suffered some mental health issues and had to go away for a bit. I did partake in more social gatherings this year, although I won't say I necessarily gained more friends. Friendly gatherings felt more purposeful and I felt much less anxiety compared to what I would typically feel.
Scorpio IC: a majority of my transformations took place at home. I would go to sleep and energetically wake up a completely different person.
Taurus Mercury square Leo Ascendant: the way I articulated myself was in direct contrast with the way I presented myself. My appearance was very bold and hard to ignore, but my voice was very soft-spoken, yet straight to the point. I also noticed that people expected me to be one way, but when I opened my mouth and was a straight shooter, it took people aback, Like yeah, you weren't expecting me to be a bad*ss were you? Also Sun conjunct Mercury and Mercury conjunct Uranus so I stood on business!
Aries Chiron at a Leo degree: You know what's worse than being projected into the spotlight? Being in the spotlight, but cringing the entire time because you don't want people to see who you truly are. Flaws and all. This was how this placement manifested for me. I've always struggled with self-acceptance but the universe really said it's time to tackle this head on! Not an easy feat...
7th house Pisces Saturn at a Leo degree: Dang, Leo energy was on me bad this year! Well, I experienced my first committed romantic relationship with a Pisces Rising! It only lasted a few months, but the levels of delusion were insane. Definitely someone I shouldn't have been with to begin with, but you don't know unless you try, right? Saturn sextile my NN and Sun, so it was for character development hahaha.
10th house Gemini Venus at Leo degree: I've had this placement in plenty of my Solar Returns and each time I thank God it's only for a year. But it's a cute lil placement for the time being. With Venus in the 10th house, I found it very easy to charm people and get on their good side. Especially after just one conversation. I didn't have any love triangles cause I don't play that, but I did have quite a few people tryna be my boo...Venus square Neptune added to the delusion I had going and Sextile Chiron helped me to heal relationship issues and my relationships with women! Ooh, Gemini rules the hands and I created a lot of beauty this past year! Especially on the internet. I was also incredibly loved at work. People bringing me gifts and buying me food regularly. I could get used to this lol.
10th house Taurus Uranus conjunct MC: drastic and unexpected changes in my career and reputation. One minute no one knew me and next minute I'm Ms. Popular?? Okay, popular for ME lol. I was nervous in my career because I was doing stuff I had never done before. My job seemed fairly stable and chill. I appreciated this vibe greatly.
These are some of the placements/aspects that stood out to me this last year. Feel free to shed some light on your personal experiences with these placements either natal or solar return. :)
Please do not under any circumstances copy, rewrite, reword, or repost my work without crediting me.
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kaisfruit · 1 year ago
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Motivation (Sportacus x GN!Reader)
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a/n; i'm just gonna drop this rn bc im taking a while on some of your guys' reqs! i promise im working on them, but i feel bad not posting much so...have this fic i wrote and finished a few days ago while i continue on writing other things <3 warnings; probably ooc stephanie and sportacus and i totally just made stuff up but like,,,otherwise no warnings! <3 word count; 7.8k
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Lazytown was exactly how the name described it; A lazy town. Though, with the arrival of Stephanie and then Sportacus the town had its days where it definitely picked up in activity. 
Unfortunately, it seemed as if you couldn’t get any of this energy that was being spread around.
You had attempted to perk up like so many others by starting with a simple job, but that didn’t do it. You still had the job of course since there’s not a lot of people in Lazytown who have the job as an ice cream vendor. Despite your efforts it seems as if these active attitudes have hit everyone but yourself. You really were trying! You tried to exit your house at least once a day (even on days when you didn’t have work!) That usually proved too much for you after about 5 minutes and you’d retreat back within the comfort your home provided. You had tried eating healthier, as you had seen Sportacus advise the kids, but it was semi-successful at best. Those things were just harder to make or find and you simply did not have the energy to deal with such a thing.
It was no surprise to you when Stephanie approached your ice cream stand with a frown on her face.
“Good afternoon, Stephanie.” You greeted, a customer service smile on your face. “What’s up?”
It took her a moment to process your question as she had gotten distracted by the mini-menu on the front of your cart. She had said she would get ice cream for the other kids so they could take a slight break from playing before getting back to it, but that didn’t mean she didn’t have an ulterior motive to offering to go.
“How are you doing?” She decided to ignore your friendly question with a question of her own.
“I’m good, thank you for asking.” Your brain seemed to work on autopilot here, the socially acceptable response tumbling from your lips. “How are you doing?”
Stephanie shook her head, “no. How are you really doing?”
“What do you mean?” You tilted your head in confusion at her, suddenly intrigued by what she was implying. 
Stephanie pursed her lips at you and it seems as if her focus had switched off the chilly treats completely. She wanted to speak to you. You mentally grimaced, this is why you usually stayed in your house most of the time.
“I think you should come and play with us!” Stephanie had a big grin on her face, leaning slightly forward as she looked up at you with big eyes.
“Oh…um,” you averted eye contact awkwardly, “I don’t really think I’d be that much fun…” You trailed off, feeling a bit bad. But it just felt…wrong. Your brain was screaming at you to just be active like everyone else and to spend time with the townsfolk. Yet your body had an argument of its own that your energy was too low and it would only drain you further.
“Sure you would!” Stephanie was adamant. “Everyone has more fun when they’re doing something!!” She had leaned more forward with the palms of her hands resting on the top of your ice cream cart. Her face filled with hope.
You shut her down.
“I’m sorry Stephanie, but I just don’t think I have it in me.” Your voice reeked of tiredness. “Do you want to buy ice cream? Or some popsicles?”
The girl seemed to deflate a bit, but begrudgingly paid for a few popsicles to take back to the others. A small treat was always welcomed by everybody. Well, everybody but…
Stephanie suddenly had a greater pep in her step than she had previously.
Meanwhile, you let out a huff of air as Stephanie began walking away. That was genuinely tough. You knew you had an issue, but you didn’t know it was bad enough to catch the attention of anyone in town. You didn’t even know if anyone in town noticed you outside of the ice cream stand! And that wasn’t in some “you’re so dark and mysterious and not like the other girls” way, but in a genuine way that you didn’t do anything too impeccable but you’re not completely forgettable either. When asked who lived in Lazytown, the citizens could pick you out just fine. Just when it came to such bright figures appearing in town, it didn’t seem like your problems were a big deal. There were bigger matters to be dealt with. You were just one person in an entire town, and it’s not like you were hurting anyone. You just had to convince yourself you’d get through this drag in your life eventually. It would happen one day. This endless slump that has existed your entire life, you had to believe it would go away one day. A day where you’d feel the energy to get up and maybe make a meal for yourself, or to go for a walk in the morning, or to even make your bed. Even if it hasn’t happened yet, it will happen. Maybe…
You leaned forwards against the ice cream stand and rested your elbows on the top to support your weight as you hung your head downwards. You sighed heavily as you closed your eyes. Just had to get through the rest of today then you could go home and feel the comfort of your bed. Just had to get through the rest of today. You’ve done it before, you can do it again. 
And you did just that. Since Stephanie had bought the treats in bulk, the day went on pretty smoothly. There were only a few other purchases here and there, but that was about it. Closing up shop made you let out a sigh of relief. You could finally let yourself recharge, even if it was just a little bit, but it was enough to get you through another day. 
As you walked to your house, you couldn’t help but think of your weird interaction with Stephanie earlier. She had been in town for quite some time now, so why was she suddenly taking an interest? Had she grown bored with everything else? That was unlikely. So unlikely that you questioned why you even thought about it in the first place. Had she seen everyone be active but you and wanted you to be included? But still, why did it take her so long to approach you? Nevermind. You shouldn’t think about it like that. Its not her job to make you feel included. But then…why?
You shuffled your shoes off at the door and closed it behind you, inhaling a deep breath as you finally got to experience home once again. If it were up to you, you’d just spend all of your time here and nowhere else. Technically, you could do that, but you really were trying to better yourself even if it felt useless. 
You mustered up just enough energy to switch into pajamas before falling asleep on your bed. The sheets warm and welcoming like an old friend who you hadn’t spoken to in years yet the bond still alive and going. You felt yourself smile lightly as you let sleep take you.
A sleepy groan escaped your lips as the sound of knocking on a door is what woke you up. Squinting blearily at your alarm clock you read a time that was far too early for your liking. You laid there sprawled out for a bit, hoping the visitor would just go away, but within a beat the knocking started up again. With a bit of mental preparation, you got yourself up and out of bed and slowly began shuffling towards the door.
Rubbing an eye with one hand, you opened the door expecting to see a neighbor wanting to speak to you about them not getting their mail or something of that sort, but you blinked rapidly at the true sight before you.
It was Sportacus. The town’s very own superhero!
Your tiredness seemed to melt away instantly and you stood up a bit straighter at the sight of him. He had never come to speak to you directly before, what was going on?
“What’s going on…?” You mumbled, voicing your exact question aloud. This earned you a slight chuckle from Sportacus.
“Why don’t you tell me?” He countered which instantly clued you in to one thing.
“I’m fine,” you smiled, “I don’t know what Stephanie said, but everything is well and okay.”
Sportacus frowned slightly, yet still wasn’t deterred in the slightest. “Well, you should go and get dressed!”
“What for?” You squinted at him confused, you had barely just woken up. “I don’t have work today.”
“All the more time for activities!” 
You grimaced at his answer. “What?”
“Come on, it’ll be fun!”
There was a pause in conversation. A silent battle happened between the two of you until you eventually sighed in defeat. You didn’t even have the energy to fight against it. You shut the door on him for a bit as you dragged your feet along the ground as you went about your house doing everything you needed to get ready for the day.
Finally, you made your way back to the front door and opened it to see Sportacus standing in your yard seeming to be admiring the grass and trees within the small area. It brought a small smile to your face as you shut your door behind you. The noise got the man’s attention and he flipped over to you, a spring in movement that never failed to surprise you whenever he did it.
“So, what activities are you having me do?” You asked, hoping to just get all of this over with as soon as possible. This would probably be a good first step for you, but you just didn’t feel the motivation. You felt no drive. 
Sportacus grinned as he rested his hands on his hips, “how do you feel about some breakfast?” The question caught you off-guard and you guessed it showed on your face as Sportacus laughed a bit. 
“Eating?” You voiced your confusion. “That doesn’t sound very…active.”
“That is where you are wrong.” Sportacus grinned, “just come with me.”
You followed behind Sportacus as you eventually left your house. Usually, that was your least favorite part of your day, but the hero had you too curious for you to even think about your house right now.
Very soon, it became very clear what he meant by eating being active.
He had insisted you two walk the longest route possible and this could quite possibly be considered the most walking you had ever done in your life. It was probably due to the incredibly fast-paced speed Sportacus had started you two out with. You were trying your best to keep up, but the distance began growing and growing until eventually Sportacus turned around and ran back to where you were.
“Don’t worry, it’s just a bit of warm-up!” He tried to reassure you, but your legs were too achy to really take it in. You thought you could do a bit of walking but maybe…
“Do you think we could walk a bit slower…?” You tried, not looking at him. He seemed to contemplate this before realization dawned on him.
“Yes, we should! That is a much better way to ease you into this.” Sportacus nodded as your head jolted up to look at him. “I’m sorry for not realizing my own speed.” He clapped you on the shoulder before gesturing for you to continue on with him. You felt awestruck, yet slowly took up a pace at his side.
“This is much better.” You smiled, a sigh of relief escaping your lips. “Thanks for listening.” 
“What kind of slightly above average hero would I be if I didn’t listen to those around me?” Sportacus proposed the rhetorical question. “I love it when you guys help me as much as I help you! That’s how growth happens.”
This sparked conversation between you two for the rest of the walk. Now that it was at a slower pace, it allowed for your guys’ words to flow freely between one another and it felt as if you were truly getting to know the hero. It was….fun! A feeling that felt completely new yet familiar in Sportacus’ company. 
“The perfect place for breakfast!” Sportacus announced abruptly, pausing in his steps which caught you a bit off guard. You look around the area with a slight frown on your face. It was a park. A park which you had never seen before (which wasn’t saying much.) There were trees scattered about and the grass was neatly trimmed. Sportacus seemed proud and took a seat beneath a tree, you stayed standing as you quirked an eyebrow at him. 
“This…isn’t a place to eat?” You asked as you still frowned. This got a good laugh out of Sportacus which only confused you more. You really were expecting a quaint café or a restaurant or even a food truck, but not an empty park. 
Sportacus just pulled out two granola bars and tossed one at you and, unsurprisingly, you didn’t catch it and it landed on the ground. You slowly bent over to pick it up and looked at the wrapper, trying to identify the contents. 
Timidly, you walked over to where Sportacus sat on the grass and decided to finally sit next to him as you made quick work of the wrapper. You tucked the plastic into a pocket, you may be lazy but hurting the environment was a no-no, and took a small nibble of the granola bar. 
“It isn’t the most healthy option,” Sportacus started once you had finally taken a bite, “but it isn’t junk food either. You will need something light for the start of the day! A bigger breakfast can come a bit later once your stomach has settled.” He shot you a reassuring smile as he said that. 
“Why do I need something light first?” You asked, wiping your hands on your pants to wipe off any leftover granola residue after you finished. “I thought a good breakfast is good for the brain?” You weren’t exactly sure about that, but you were pretty sure you had heard Sportacus say that before. 
“Right you are!” Sportacus agreed with a nod. “But I did say we were going to get active, yes?” You nodded slowly. “Well, that wouldn’t go over well if you had a full stomach. Getting sick would not be ideal.” Realization dawned on you as he said that. Sportacus was going to have you doing actual big time exercises? Right off the bat?! You don’t think you’ve ever taken the time to exercise in your life, which is probably why you felt so incredibly sluggish all the time, but still! That sounded horrible. You’d much rather just lay in your bed all day and maybe be on your phone when you’re not sleeping…Yeah, that sounds more your speed.
“Um…how active?” You asked as Sportacus reached his hands out towards you which you accepted as he pulled you up. 
“Nothing big! I promise you.” He grinned, slowly releasing his grip on you once you gained balance. Strangely, you missed the warmth his hands provided. “The hard stuff won’t come until later.” The look that came across your face must have been some sort of funny as it caused Sportacus to chuckle. 
“Come now, we’ll start light. Then we can get actual breakfast. How does that sound?” He spoke calmly, surely luring you into a false sense of security even though you knew Sportacus didn’t have an evil bone in his body. Your body slumped in defeat as you let out a sigh while nodding. The elf was absolutely beaming. “Great! Let’s get started!”
An hour later and you were drenched in sweat and could barely catch a breath. Meanwhile, Sportacus looked as if he had barely done anything. You were insanely embarrassed by this fact, but he was trying his best to help you feel normal.
“You’ve done great so far!” Sportacus praised, whipping out a water bottle which you gratefully took. Truth be told, he was right. You didn’t do much. Just a few cardio workouts and he allowed you to move at a comfortable pace. Still, that didn’t just erase all of your years of no workouts and you were now contemplating if you could even do this at all. “Honestly, I’m surprised you’re still here.”
“What do you mean?” You panted, lowering the water bottle from your lips.
“Well, when I first got here it took a while for everyone to just…take my advice?” He said this more like a question, as if the right words for what had happened weren’t coming to him. “I could maybe get 10 minutes of working out before getting ignored. You’re a real trooper!”
You weren’t sure you quite believed him, but you appreciated the effort. Everyone really seemed to enjoy Sportacus’ company and were happy to engage in activities with him. No way the citizens started out ignoring him? “Thanks.” You finally said, a light smile on your face. 
“Anytime!” Sportacus clapped you on the shoulder. “Now, about that breakfast I promised–” Your eyes widened and you perked up which made him huff out a bit of laughter. “Let’s head out. Then we can take a walk after and then, I’ll let you have the rest of the day as you want it. It wouldn’t be right for me to control your schedule and make you do what I want.” You nodded gratefully to him with a smile and you two slowly made your way out of the park and towards a local restaurant that was currently serving breakfast. 
The conversation while eating flowed seamlessly and it was nice having someone’s company. You weren’t expecting the town’s superhero to be such a great hangout companion, but this charisma of his is probably how he gets others motivated towards bettering their lives. It was…appreciated. You didn’t really know if this would fix everything for you, nothing could be some magical one trick quick fix, but it helped put healthy behaviors in a positive light for you. At least a little bit. Your bed and your house still sounded like the most perfect place in the world, but you wouldn’t mind getting out like this every now and again.
After lunch, Sportacus took you on a walk as he had promised but this time your time with one another was spent in silence. It wasn’t bad. Quite the opposite. You probably talked more today than you had in your entire life, so quieting down and just appreciating your surroundings while in the company of someone else was perfect. You’d probably feel like a huge dork if it was just you walking around all quiet like this, but Sportacus being there just made sense. 
You weren’t quite sure when the walk would end and it seemed as if it wouldn’t until a familiar head of pink hair began to make its way over to your position. Sportacus got a bit shifty on his feet as she approached while you just waved at Stephanie with a smile on your face. A genuine one compared to the customer service one you had given her yesterday.
“What’s up?” The girl asked, a smile on her face. “Did your guys’ morning together go good?”
You nodded at her. “Yeah. I’m exhausted to be honest.” You laughed which caused Stephanie to let out a little laugh of her own. “How’d you know we’d been out together?” It was with that question that you finally noticed Sportacus acting a bit off. Stephanie just stifled a laugh behind her hand at his behavior and you were made aware of the fact that they knew something you didn’t.
“Well, Sportacus here–”
“Stephanie told me about how you were at the ice cream stand yesterday!” He quickly interrupted her which only caused the girl to laugh a bit louder. “So she knew of my plans to come out and help you.” That made sense you supposed, but why would the two of them be acting so weird about it? Sportacus seemed to have a light red hue to his face and Stephanie looked like the cat who ate the canary.
“Well, I’m gonna head out.” You began awkwardly, a nervous smile on your face. “Thanks for getting me out of bed this morning, Sportacus!” You waved and the other duo waved back to you before you turned and began walking away. In the distance, you could hear more of what you assumed to be Stephanie’s laughter. 
What was so funny?
-
This routine continued on for a month. Sportacus would wake you up in the morning, you’d work out, eat breakfast, then part ways. It became a part of your routine even if some days you guys would switch it around because of your job or his self-assigned duty to help the town against Robbie Rotten. It, strangely, became a welcome change to you. Maybe the change you had been trying to make all of these years had finally come to you. You just needed a little push to get the ball rolling. You found yourself actively making the bed in the morning, choosing more healthy options to your usual diet, you even started noticing you didn’t dread leaving the house as much anymore. Sure, you still had a few of your quirks like thinking you deserved a little treat for every success or preferring to sleep in, but you weren’t dragging your feet along just trying to get by one day at a time. This was the best you had felt in a while!
Once a few more weeks passed after that first month, you started hanging out with Sportacus more outside of his personal training with you. You got along with the hero surprisingly well and it felt nice to finally have a close friend within the town. With his help, you finally began talking and making friends with other townsfolk. You had accepted Stephanie’s requests to play or hang out more and more. Being around everyone really made you feel like you were a part of a community instead of just being some random face within one. Sportacus had helped you a lot…
“Soooo whatcha thinking about?” The voice startled you out of your thoughts and you suppose you jumped a little too because a “relax, it’s just me,” was quickly added on. You lifted your head up from where you were staring at the ground to meet the eyes of Stephanie. A light smile graced your face as you gave a nod of acknowledgement towards the girl as she sat down on the bench beside you.
“Nothin’ really.” You answered. “Just sitting on this bench and looking at my surroundings.” Stephanie pursed her lips at that answer as if she was hoping to hear a different one. But she let that grievance go with a sigh and instead decided on something else to talk about.
“I’m really proud of you.” 
“For what?” You huffed out a laugh. “I haven’t done anything.”
“What do you mean?” Stephanie said to you, wide-eyed. “A month or two ago, I would’ve only seen you at your ice cream stand! Now, look at you, I found you out in the wild without any coercion from anyone in Lazytown!” You shrugged at what she said and she comically deflated where she sat. 
“I mean, I guess…” you began slowly, “but this really isn’t much. I really haven’t done anything. It’s been Sportacus’ influence.” The mention of the hero had her perk back up and she leaned forward a bit in her seat. She was now swinging her legs since they didn’t quite touch the ground and her hands rested on the seat of the bench.
“Still! You’re the one doing the things!” Stephanie encouraged.
“Yeah, but–”
“But what?”
You sighed, “I’m nowhere near his level! How am I supposed to truly be better if I’m not even up to his active standard?”
“Are you joking?” Stephanie deadpanned with a raise of a brow. “He was made to be active. I like to have fun and play and move around, but at the rate he does it? No way!” You were silent after that, your gaze once again focused at the ground. Stephanie was having an internal battle with herself before she finally let out a groan of frustration before speaking. “Besides, you’ll always be up to his standard. He’s…” She had a pause as she searched for the correct word. “He appreciates every ounce of your effort. He appreciates you.”
Stephanie let that sit with you and decided to finally go silent herself.
Sportacus…appreciated you? Well, he probably appreciated everyone he was nice like that. But hearing the words made you…feel something. Something that had your face heating up and making your stomach do flips.
“Th..Thanks, Stephanie.” You got out, a shaky smile on your reddened face. Now this was what the pink-haired girl wanted to see. 
“Anytime!” She said with a grin and waved jovially as you excused yourself from the park bench and began speed walking home. You barely had half the mind to wave back as you were in such a rush. Why were you in a rush again? Your mind was scrambling with ideas that you barely even registered that you had made it home. 
Closing the door behind you, you quickly locked it and leaned back against it as you let out quick breaths of air. You held a hand to your chest as you had to force yourself to even out your inhales and exhales. What had gotten into you?
Sportacus.
He was so nice to you, so kind, supportive. Could you have…
You hopped into the shower, a shaky attempt to clear your head. You just needed a shower and to go to bed. That’d fix everything. After that it’d be like Stephanie never said anything that made you think about something you’d been pushing down for weeks. Girl math!
Those things didn’t help.
In fact, you couldn’t even get to sleep. Your mind was running wild with the idea that you maybe sort of fell in love with Lazytown’s slightly above average hero. You had done everything you could think of: counting sheep, drinking a warm glass of milk, breathing exercises, etc. But nothing would calm your racing mind and rapid heartbeat. The only person you felt comfortable enough to call at a time like this just so happened to be the source of the issue, so you were forcing yourself to suffer all by your lonesome.
Sportacus was most definitely nice to everyone in town just like he was with you. You’re so stupid for falling head over heels for a man over the slightest acts of kindness. But he was just so sweet and he took time out of his day to make you feel included and he was charming and–
You needed to shut up (even if you weren’t actually speaking.)
Safe to say, you didn’t sleep that night. By the time you heard the routine knocks on your door, your head was swimming with unsolved drowsiness. Knowing who it was caused a pit to form in your stomach, but you still got up out of bed and shuffled slowly towards your front door. You opened it up just a crack and saw the man himself standing there like he always did. You noticed him perk up when he noticed the movement, but a frown formed on his face when you didn’t open the door all the way.
“Is everything alright?” He asked, peeking through the small crack in the door to see a sliver of your figure.
“Yeah, I…um…give me a moment.” Your voice was overwhelmed with exhaustion as you closed the door and slowly got ready for the morning. It seemed as if sleep had tried to win too late because your mind was no longer racing with thoughts of Sportacus, but instead it felt blank. You can’t believe you pulled an all-nighter. Granted, you really tried not to.
Finally you made your way back to the front door and Sportacus was quickly on you once you made a step onto your front porch. He had noticed the slightest shift in your behavior and damn it if that didn’t make your heart skip a beat.
“Let’s go.” You smiled at him softly which caused a bit of the tension to drop from his shoulders, but he was still on guard. He couldn’t really tell what was wrong, but he knew something was off. 
He carried most of the talking on your guys’ way to the park and you were happy to listen, trying your best to suppress any yawns so that he wouldn’t take it as a sign of disinterest. How could you not be interested in everything he had to say?
Sportacus handed you a fruit cup for today’s light breakfast and you accepted it as you two sat side by side under a tree while eating. The conversation seemed to fall as you two ate, or, as Sportacus ate. He didn’t realize you weren’t until he felt a head fall against his shoulder. The elf jumped a bit and looked down at you and noticed you had fallen asleep on him as he heard a soft snore drift from you. A fond smile graced his features at the sight. That answered every question he’s had since seeing you this morning. You hadn’t had a good night’s rest. But what was the reason for that, he wondered. Carefully, he grabbed the fruit cup from your hands and set it aside to avoid a mess and began taking some time to figure out what to do. Sportacus was not very fond of staying this still if he wasn’t sleeping, but you probably needed this more than your daily workout even if it would ruin your sleep schedule for a bit. You also looked so incredibly peaceful and he couldn’t say he wasn’t glad about the fact that you trusted him enough to fall asleep near him.
To be honest, Sportacus has taken an interest in you since he had first arrived in Lazytown. Despite having the same problems as literally every citizen here, you were kind and you really did seem like you wanted to be doing your best. Plus you got along well with the kids (which may or may not have had something to do with your job) but he spent a long time admiring you from afar. He wanted to help you like he helped everyone, but he was selfish, And by that he means that you made him incredibly nervous. An emotion that the elf didn’t feel often, so he struggled to deal with it. Stephanie, the ever so observant kid she was, noticed his glances at you, the way he seemed extra interested anytime you were brought up in conversation. Once piecing together what all of it meant, that’s when she had made her way up to your ice cream stand that day. She didn’t want to be outright with anything, but she at least wanted to help Sportacus talk to you and what better motivation for him than to help you out of your slump. Stephanie didn’t know if you two would be all romance, but what kind of friend would she be if she didn’t help out the one person who was always helping everyone else? 
That’s how Sportacus got himself into this current situation. He realized he had been staring at you the entire time he was lost in thought and got embarrassed by that fact despite the fact no one was around to see him. You looked cute when you slept, but this surely wasn’t an ideal place for you to sleep, especially with the position you were in as your neck would definitely feel it when you woke up. With a disappointed sigh, Sportacus shook you awake.
“Wha?” You exhaled, rubbing your eyes a bit. You blinked rapidly trying to get a feeling for where you were even if you had only been out for at least 10 minutes. Upon realizing your position, you quickly lifted your head off of Sportacus’ shoulder and apologized profusely with your face lit up a bright red.
“It is alright! I promise!!” He chuckled lightly, a smile on his face. Yeah, you were cute. “We can workout another day. I think you need to catch up on some sleep.” You tried to protest, but a yawn cut you off which made you groan. You began moving to begin the walk back home, but found Sportacus doing everything for you and at his super fast pace so you couldn’t even begin to protest. He had picked up your fruit cup and every other belonging you both had brought along before holding his hands out to pick you up like he often did. You looked up at him with wide eyes and softly rested your palms on his. His grip didn’t falter as he hoisted you up and you stumbled forward closer to him once on your feet since you were a bit disoriented from your lack of sleep. A matching set of red complimented both of your faces at the proximity, but your eyes stayed locked with his. A beat passed before your gaze casted downwards, getting nervous at the prolonged eye contact.
“Come on, I’ll walk you home.” He spoke softly, his hands still clasping yours. You rubbed your thumbs along his knuckles absentmindedly as you nodded at him. You’re not sure who pulled away first, but your hands separated and you two were now walking side by side. Finding yourself incapable of walking in a straight line, constantly bumping into Sportacus as you walked, you felt a strong arm come to rest along your shoulders and it held you steady. You gasped at the touch, but welcomed it all the same. It felt nice.
Meanwhile, Sportacus was a bit panicky. Was this too much? You weren’t complaining, but you always were extremely polite. In all honesty, he did just want to help. No one could walk perfectly straight all of the time, but he noticed how your constant faltering was getting on your nerves and while he didn’t mind it, he wanted to relieve that extra stress. But what if this was the wrong way to go about it? He would not be overthinking it this much if it were anyone else…
“What kept you up last night?” He decided to ask. You tensed up at the question and sent quick glances at him as your heart began racing again. How could you answer that? You were NOT about to pour your heart out to this man. No amount of sleep deprivation could get you that delirious.
“I don’t know,” you eventually settled on, “just couldn’t get my mind to ‘turn off’ I guess.” Sportacus nodded as if he didn’t quite believe you, but he trusted your boundaries enough to not push past that.
The rest of the walk continued on in relative silence as he never let go of your shoulders until you two had safely made it back to your house.
“Thank you for walking me back.” You said as if he didn’t walk you back everyday. “I’m sorry for cutting today short.”
“Don’t worry. Your well-being always comes first.” 
You two spent a moment just staring at one another as if neither of you wanted to actually separate from the other.
“I hope you rest well.” Sportacus broke the silence and sent you that damned smile of his, the smile that made you weak in the knees. And you nodded, a soft ‘thank you’ escaping your lips as he somersaulted off to who knows where. You let out a sigh of contentment as you shut your front door. He was something else.
You couldn’t fall asleep faster.
Stephanie knew something was up as soon as she saw Sportacus zooming around the town square haphazardly as he was doing an assortment of exercises. A slight frown was on her face as she watched the hero for a few moments before calling his name. This made him pause and he looked over at the girl. His attention finally had her walking over to him.
“Hey, are you okay?” She asked. “You’re usually like this when you need to, I don’t know, occupy your mind or something.”
Sportacus was conflicted on telling Stephanie anything. On one hand, he knew she knew he had feelings for you, but on the other why would he let the child get mixed in with his love life? She was extremely intelligent for her age, but that didn’t make it any less strange in his head.
“Is it about [name]? Pleeeaaaassseee tell me it is! I love hearing about you two!” She exclaimed with a big grin on her face. His reaction was everything she needed and she clapped excitedly. “Are you guys finally together? Wait no, can’t be. You wouldn’t be so stressed out. But no way they rejected you either hm. What if–”
“Stephanie.” Sportacus began which effectively quieted the girl. “Nothing happened.”
The girl quirked a brow in disbelief and crossed her arms along her chest.
“Nothing happened! Seriously!” Sportacus exclaimed. “They didn’t get much sleep last night so we canceled this morning.” He explained.
“Ohhhh so you are upset?”
“No! It is very much important that they get the proper amount of sleep. It’s just, what if they’re sick? Or something is wrong? Those are the only reasons I can think of that would make them lose sleep.” He finally voiced his concerns and it got Stephanie thinking. Sportacus was pacing as she stood still, a hand on her chin in thought. Suddenly, it seemed as if a lightbulb went off above her head and she squealed. Sportacus sharply turned towards her, looking at the girl as if she had grown a second head.
“Maybeeeee…They like you too!” Stephanie planted that seed. She was trusting her gut, and based on her previous interaction with you, it seemed pretty likely.
“I don’t know Stephanie…” Sportacus thought. He usually wasn’t the one to second guess such actions, he was always certain and dove in head first. But, as stated previously, you made him nervous.
“I think,” Stephanie started, “you should ask them out! Awwww you guys would be sooo cute!!” The pink haired girl cooed and Sportacus couldn’t help but laugh a bit at her enthusiasm, even if his stomach seemed to churn at the thought of possibly overstepping a boundary with you. It’d hurt the most to know that he had made you uncomfortable in some way. Stephanie had begun staring up at him with puppy dog eyes trying to use her cuteness that all kids were granted to sway Sportacus into making a move. The hero sighed.
“I’ll think about it.”
-
That might have been the best sleep you have ever gotten in your life. You had even managed to sleep until early the next day which is just ridiculous, but at least you didn’t wake up in the middle of the night and continue a cycle of a poor sleep schedule. This felt like your entire body had done a factory reset.
You made your way through your morning routine and got on your phone once you finished. Sportacus could show up any minute now, and even if you feared embarrassing yourself in front of him due to your feelings, not spending time with him sounded like a new form of torture. So risking embarrassment it was!
Only a few more minutes of scrolling through social media and you heard the sound of knocks on your door. You rushed over to go answer it as fast as you could. Opening the door you grinned as you saw Sportacus standing there. His face brightened at seeing you and he opened his arms up wide in surprise.
“You’re awake!” He exclaimed which made you laugh with a roll of your eyes. “Ready to get going?” Something seemed…off with the hero. He was pretty normal, but he seemed jittery, anxious. Two words that didn’t fit him all that well.
“Oh, so ready! I really need to stretch my limbs out after all of that resting.” You said, pulling your arms up above your head in a stretch to accentuate your point. A look that could only be described as pure adoration crossed Sportacus’ face and you looked at him strangely. “What? Did I say something?”
He stumbled a bit over his words as the two of you finally began your walk to the park. “You didn’t say anything, it's just,” Sportacus sighed before turning his gaze to you. His eyes were filled with a sincerity you hadn’t ever seen on him before. “I’m very proud of you, [name].” That was absolutely the last thing you expected him to say, but you stayed silent as if urging him to continue. “You’ve come very far in such a short amount of time. Of course, I’m proud of everyone here in Lazytown for their improvements! Even with people like Robbie Rotten around, all of you continue on and are unknowingly eager to better yourselves. But you…” He trailed off, his gaze finally leaving yours as he stared ahead. “Your progress is special to me.”
You were certain your face was bright red at his statement and you turned your head to look at the ground so he wouldn’t notice.
“Thank you.” You murmured bashfully as you played with a piece of your hair. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”
“Nonsense!” Sportacus spoke incredulously. “I only got you out of bed in the morning. The rest was all you! You are extraordinary.” 
The conversation died off there as you replayed his words over and over in your head. He was too perfect. You were totally going to explode. Maybe you couldn’t keep up with your guys’ daily workout if he was going to keep acting so sweet. 
You hadn’t even noticed it yet, but you had made it to your guys’ tree. You set down your workout bag and were waiting for Sportacus to offer you the snack of the day, but quickly you noticed that his attention was focused somewhere in the distance. You tried following his gaze, but it was apparent he was just lost in thought. Timidly, you waved a hand in front of his face to snap him back to attention and it did the trick.
“Ah! Sorry, I was just thinking…”
“About what?”
Sportacus’ stomach was doing flips, cartwheels, he felt as if he had just eaten a singular bar of chocolate. This must be what sickness felt like. The elf wetted his lips nervously before he let his eyes land on you. He stood there for a moment and let himself take in your appearance. No matter how many times he saw you, he didn’t know if he’d ever get enough. Maybe he should just,
“[Name],” he spoke softly, gaining your full attention, “you’re incredible. Seriously. You may not think so, but you inspire me everyday. You’re different from everyone else here. Yes, I care for everyone, obviously. I wouldn’t protect and encourage people who I didn’t genuinely like and believe in, but you’re…what I’m trying to say is that I look forward to every moment I get to spend with you. Hanging out and working out with you is more refreshing than any amount of sleep or relaxation I could ever get.” Sportacus had unconsciously moved closer to you as you spoke and you were just listening in pure awe. You gasped and looked down as he took your hands in his, his grip soft yet firm as if he didn’t want to lose this moment with you. “I was wondering if you would like to…go on a date with me?”
Your eyes were full of wonder as you stared up at the man. Every word he spoke was swimming around in your head and you were in complete disbelief.
“You? Want to date me?” You asked softly, looking him in the eyes.
“There is no one else I would rather be with.”
“Why?” Your words echoed despite the open area you two currently occupied. “Why me? I’m not the most athletic person around and I’m still pretty lazy. You’re…you’re a superhero! And I’m just…well, I’m just me.”
His hands quickly left your hands so he could cup your face. He brushed his thumb along your cheek as you two stared at each other intently.
“And you are exactly what I want.” Sportacus said with complete sincerity. “I’m only a slightly above average hero. That is nothing compared to how you appear in my eyes.”
Your eyes welled with tears, but you refused to let them spill. No one had ever spoken such words to you before in your life. Without thinking, you lunged forward and wrapped your arms around Sportacus’ neck in a warm embrace to which he quickly returned. His arms were wrapped strongly around your waist as you buried your head a bit into his shoulder. 
“I’d love to.” You finally murmured, pulling back slightly so that you could look at him. Your arms still rested around his neck and now his hands just lightly rested on your waist, trying to be careful with his placement out of respect.
“Love to what?” He asked, a confused look on his face that just caused you to smile.
“Go on a date with you. I’d love to.” You clarified and it's as if stars lit up in his eyes at your words. 
A beat of silence was held between the two of you as you both just stared at the other, happy to be in each other’s presence.
In an instant, you both surged forward as your lips interlocked. It was soft, tender, spark-inducing as the kiss continued on. The only thing running through your guys’ minds is that this is how it’s supposed to be. This kiss was right. Your lips moved in tandem for what felt like eternity in just a few seconds. If you had it your way, you would never separate, but your lungs’ cries for help cause you to back away and rest your forehead against his as you both caught your breaths. Staring at him, you couldn’t help but smile which caused him to smile in turn.
You knew you’d find motivation to become better eventually. What you never expected, however, was for it to come from someone else’s belief in you.
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wososage · 1 year ago
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One Step at a Time: USWNT x Reader
Summary: Y/N plays in the opening match of the world cup but it isn’t sunshine and fairy tales. Y/N does everything they can to hold their shit together and help the team. 
Warnings: sorry this is very very sad because i need to write out my sad emotions and this is a little bit me writing my life into an imagine… italics are Y/N’s internal monologue
Word count: 1234
Y/N POV
Step One: get to the lobby of the hotel before the bus is supposed to leave
Just put one foot in front of the other. Take the elevator, not the stairs. Save your energy for the game you are going to need it. Are my headphones on? Are my sun glasses on? Follow the team out of the hotel. Ignore the fans. Ignore the media. Get on the bus and sit in your seat.
Step Two: Get to the start of the game without crying
Chill playlist only. Focus on good deep breaths. Keep your eyes closed. Imagine today being a better day. Your family is in the stands. They can’t wait to watch you do what you love. They are so proud of all of the hard work it took you to get here. They will go crazy if you score a goal today. Do the same routine you always do. Take the picture frame out of your bag. Remember that you are playing for those who can no longer be here. Take the necklace off and put it on the picture frame. Get dressed. Warm up. How do the muscles feel? How do the joints feel? Is blood sugar okay? Are electrolyte levels okay?
Step Three: Be the player that the team needs you to be
We all line up. The whistle blows. 
Time to push forward. I am open. The ball is at my feet. The keeper is off their line. Chip the keeper Y/N. Holy shit. It worked. I just scored. Everyone is running to me.
“That was amazing Y/N!” Alex yells in my ear.
“Y/N you are the best!” Lindsey says joining the swarm of people hugging me.
I look up to the sky with tears in my eyes.
This is for you. It's always for you.
“Come on guys,” I say. “There is a lot of game left to be played.”
Line up for the corner. Have a plan to lose the defender. Never lose sight of the ball. Run towards it. Jump high. Redirect to the back post. 
“Fuck yeah!”
“That's two Y/N!”
“Y/N is unstoppable!”
Don’t get cocky. Stay humble. Stay true to yourself.
“Y/N! Push forward.”
I can see what is about to happen. Stay on side Y/N and everything will work out. Run. Get your ass there. Just get a toe on the ball. The keeper can’t stop you. Redirect. Don’t add any power.
“Hat trick! Hat trick! Hat trick!”
“Y/N! You are the love of my life!”
The whistle blows and I just sit on the ground and cry. I should be happy right now, but instead I am so sad. 
This is not how the world cup was supposed to go.
Step 4: Put on a happy face until the public can’t see you
“That was an amazing way to start the world cup,” Vlatko says to all of us in the huddle. “I am proud of all of you. Y/N, congrats on the hat trick. Everyone, enjoy this moment. The rest of the world cup starts tomorrow.”
“One more thing before everyone starts to look for their family,” Pinoe says. “Y/N get in the middle. You know how birthdays work on this team.”
Everyone sings happy birthday to me and then we head over to the friends and family section. 
Seeing everyone so excited that their family is here makes me happy. It’s great to see everyone in such good moods.
“Y/N where is your family?” Sonnett asks. “I wanna say hi to them!”
“They’re in America,” I tell her quietly, trying to not cry. “They aren’t coming to any of the games.”
“That’s okay,” Sonnett whispers in my ear while giving me a hug. “All of our families will support you and be your family during the tournament.”
“Thanks Sonny”
Step 5: Get through media as quickly as possible
Heif takes me to the mixed zone, where I am presented with the player of the match trophy.
“Y/N,” A reporter says, getting my attention. “After your goals and after the game you seemed emotional. Could you speak on what emotions you are feeling and what has been going through your head throughout the game?”
Do I lie or do I tell the truth?
Lie.
Truth.
Lie.
Truth.
Lie.
Truth. The truth will come out eventually so there is no point in lying now.
“Yeah, there definitely are a lot of emotions when it comes to playing in the world cup. Most of the game I kept telling myself to be that player that my teammates need me to be. Every goal was such a whirlwind. They were all split second decisions that worked out in the team's favor. Before every game, I remind myself of all the people I play this sport for. All of the people who would be proud of me for fighting for my dreams. After the goals, I was thinking who I was scoring for. The ones who would be going crazy if they were able to watch this game. I am sure if you were to ask anyone on the team, they would say that they compartmentalize during games and tournaments. I am no different. But once that final whistle blew, I let myself think about the things I’ve been blocking out during the game. I let myself sit in the emotions I was putting aside in order to be the player the team needs me to be.”
“Y/N, is there anything you would like to say to your family right now?”
It’s okay to cry. Everyone will understand.
“Yes. Unfortunately, my family was not able to make it out to the world cup, so they are back home watching this on TV. Before… Before we left the hotel I got a call from my family. There was a family emergency. So to my family: I am very sorry that I am not able to be there to support you right now. I know what you are going through feels unreal and unimaginable. I love each and everyone of you. Please take time for yourself and make sure you are doing okay. And I hope that watching the world cup brings you a little bit of light in this very dark time. Those goals were for Reagan, Chase, and Cole. I will fight to win this world cup for you and for them. And I will be back in a month to give all of you hugs.”
Step 6: Let the team in. Let the team support you.
I am sobbing by the time I get back to the locker room. Almost everyone is either in the showers or the ice bath. I get to my locker and suddenly I am filled with rage. I punch my locker over and over again until I am pulled away by Aubrey and Naeher. I collapse in their arms and just sob.
Nothing in the world feels okay.
By the time I have calmed down, the entire team is sitting in their lockers silently. Patiently waiting for me to talk to them.
“My brothers died today,” I say, my voice raw. “I found out right before we got on the bus. I am staying for the rest of the world cup. My family will be staying in America. I need to win this for them.”
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offical-ouroboros · 8 months ago
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I Love You
John Doe x Reader Blurb
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CW: Unhealthy Relationship, Referenced Kidnapping/Captive Reader, General Relationship Angst from Yandere Doe, Author Projecting on You
Literally just wrote this because I'm sleep deprived and wanted to post some angst id normally write in a doc or something LOL
He didn't understand why you were crying. Why you were ignoring him. Why you seemed so scared when he came near you. Of course, he liked seeing you scared. He liked your tears. He liked how jumpy you were. But... Not like this.
"You... Look at me." He whines, reaching out to touch your arm before pausing as you flinch. "You, what's wrong? Did something happen?" His voice is full of concern.
You can't muster up the energy to even respond with a sound.
"My love?" Doe brings himself to force you into a hug, no longer minding it as you tremble and try to shake him off. "Talk to me, You! I miss your voice..."
You don't want to look at him. You don't want to talk to him. You don't want to be anywhere near him. But you can't escape. Whatever he is... You're just trapped. Wherever you go in his 'house' he'll find you. The front door, the windows- It all leads to a terrifying abyssal mess that you're sure would kill you if it had the chance. You're safest with him. For now, at least.
He takes a deep inhale of your scent, sighing as he nuzzles into you. His arms are wrapped around yours, and his hair is smothering you as it coils and clings with an equally deranged need for you.
"You...?" He speaks up again. "I love you.~"
I love you. You hated how he said that- You knew he meant it, to an extent. But...
"I love love love you!" He repeats, grinning as he rolls his head against yours. "Don't you love me too?"
No. You didn't. How could you? He'd... Taken you. You barely knew him!
~ "Can I come home with you?" He'd asked. Of course you said no- This man was on the bus you took to work, then showed up there too- Who knows how long he'd been watching you?
It didn't matter what you said. Because soon enough, he'd shown up in your home. You told him to leave- And when he wouldn't, you tried to leave your self. But the second you turned around, you realized something was wrong. Your house... Wasn't yours.
It was his.
You didn't understand how it happened, or why, but now you were here.
It had been a day, maybe. You couldn't tell. It didn't matter. All that mattered to him is you were there. ~
"Doe." You say softly, and he immediately becomes ecstatic. "Yes, You? What is it, my love?" His hyper voice hurts your ear as he talks so loud. With the flinch you make, he seems to understand.
"I want to go home." You continued. His joyous persona faded a bit. "What do you mean, You? You are home! You're with me!"
"No. I want to be at my house." You say a bit more sternly.
His smile is a bit more forced now as he moves uncomfortably. You can keep telling him that all you want- He hates the idea.
"But... You? I love you! Why do you want to leave?" He can't even comprehend why you're uncomfortable in this situation.
It could take a few minutes, days- Might never happen. But hopefully, one day he finally caves. With a lot of guilt on both sides.
- "Doe, you don't do this to someone you love." You reason while trying to stay calm. "I want to go outside. I wanna see the sky- Feel nature under me- Have fresh air."
He lets out a soft whimper, similar to a dog. "But, You-"
"No, Doe." You don't let him finish whatever he's planning to say to make you feel bad for wanting to leave. "This isn't normal. I want to leave. Now."
You hate the feeling as it hurts you to raise your voice at him, to use a negative tone with him. But you have to. If there's any chance of you loving him back, he needs to let you go.
The look on his face is so... Scared. If he could cry, he would.
You look away, taking a deep breath. "Doe..." Your voice is much more gentle now, and he anxiously awaits your words.
"I just want to go back to my house." You start to explain. "I want to go home. I want to go outside. I want to do... Anything. Anything outside of here. It doesn't mean I'm leaving you."
He's holding his jacket and trembling.
"I'm not like you. I can't just stay cooped up like this. And you can't make me stay here and claim to love me."
"But I-"
"I know. You do love me. That's what you're going to say, isn't it?"
He tenses up more. It looked like he was almost breaking under the stress. You hesitate in your mind, eventually reaching out to touch him.
"I understand you don't want to be alone. I know... You love me. But right now, I can't feel the same. Let me go. Take me back to my house. You can stay near me. I just... Need a break."
He's quiet.
" . . . Do you promise you won't leave me, You?"
Silence.
You sigh, pulling him into a hug.
"I promise I won't leave you, Doe."
105 notes · View notes
yourtwistedlies · 8 months ago
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❝ women’s hearts are lethal weapons ❞
val ! ✩ she/her ✩ minor ✩ jason grace’s gf (REAL) ✩ speak now obsessed ✩ gracie abrams lovebot ✩ summer baby ✩ certified procrastinator ✩ professional listener ✩ pathological people pleaser ✩ general amaya’s #1 fan ✩ fitz vacker defender ✩ honorary grammar police ✩ kpop stan (mostly ggs) ✩ my moots’ cheerleader ✩ under the illusion i can write ✩ somewhat smart ✩ cabin 13 girl ✩
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dni: if you are racist, homophobic, xenophobic, support kill all ___, sexist, 18+ only, religiophobic, creepy, toxic, or literally just a jerk, please leave!
byi: i swear sometimes!! i also adore using cute nicknames and pet names for my moots!! if you don’t feel comfortable w/ that or anything else, please let me know <33
moots - wattpad - ao3 - carrd - follower event (coming soon ⁉️) - save the children!
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•̩̩͙⁺ the basics ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘
call me valerie/val or twisted!!
she/her, straight (heterosexual), minor (18+ only acc’s please do not follow), 18+ do not interact unless i interact first or we are moots (on my list or to be added- i am the judge of who is to be added), cancer (zodiac, but i don’t believe in them), Christian (i post about it sometimes), << summer baby, entp (mbti), 8w7 (enneagram), ambivert, slytherin, cabin 13, shade (guys i swear i wasn’t trying to be edgy or smth with the past two and this 😭😭 i took the official quizzes i promise lmao), swiftie, kpop fan, staying up writing until 4am gives me life, purple is the best color (this is not up to debate, only yellow even comes close), proud notes app writer, CATS > DOGS (occasionally my verdict changes), bunny lover, chronic platonic sofitzer, i’m either hyperactive or extremely tired (there is no in between), people say im smart, but sometimes i feel like the biggest idiot ever lmao, and ofc dex dizznee’s much needed publicist (my favorite role of mine ever)!!!
•̩̩͙⁺ music ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘
taylor swift, olivia rodrigo, sza, conan gray, alicia keys, emei, gracie abrams, maisie peters, sabrina carpenter, laufey, queen riri (rihanna), adele, beabadoobee, tiffany day, le sserafim, ive, newjeans, itzy, nmixx, stay-c, aespa, everglow, txt (baby fan), illit & more kpop, lizzy mcalpine, pheobe bridgers, nessa barrett, pinkpantheress, claire rosinkranz, lyn lapid, alessia cara, reneé rapp, mckenna grace, and more!!
as i hope you can tell, i like a lot of music :)
•̩̩͙⁺ books ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘
pjo, hoo, (never read toa, but yes, ik what happens in tbm), the rrverse, kotlc, city spies, ss (spy school), alex rider (not done with rr), the academy for the unbreakable arts,
and my many other fandoms i’ve forgotten about (dead magisterium fandom oop-)
i’ll add more fandoms as i remember them lol
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•̩̩͙⁺ ships ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘
rayllum, clauderry (stfu they’re adorable), percabeth (otp energy), sokeefe, dexiana, tiana (yes i know im the most indecisive bitch ever shut up you toad /jjjj i actually love u platonically), jason grace x ME (/j but i do love him lol), and more!!
•̩̩͙⁺ blogs ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘
side blog: @yourtangledpromises
taylor blog: @iknowplxces (guys this is so abandoned + has my old intro 🤮 ignore this js trust - august 15 2024 val)
and perhaps more?? (muahahaha)
•̩̩͙⁺ side note ₊˚. ↴ ·˚༘
if you’d like to be added to my moots list, or talk, please tell me (by wonder girls)!!
if we’re moots we’re actually bffs now (you just don’t notice it yet)
if i don’t respond to your ask/tag/rb/literally anything immediately i am not ignoring you!! i’m just lazy or busy and will do it later <33
im your biggest fan btw
1 Corinthians 16:14
with love,
valerie
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honeypiehotchner · 1 year ago
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Devil's Backbone (Unsub!Hotch x Fem!Reader) -- part nine
We'll be back to Wed/Fri next week I promise!! Btw I listened to "Decode" a lot while writing more of Hotch spiraling so......
Warnings: reader dealing w the aftermath of how Hotch treated her in the last chapter, more lies
Follow @honeypiehotchnerlibrary and turn on post notifications to be "tagged" when a new chapter goes up!
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Nine: How did we get here? -- "Decode" by Paramore
After you left, Hotch continued talking to himself for a few seconds before “ending” the phone call. He felt stupid faking a call, but he needed you to leave and not ask questions. He knew you had questions, and that was worrisome.
He hadn’t meant for all of that to happen. But he felt better now, reinvigorated, so that was worth it, he supposed. He needed the boost of energy. He had unsubs to find. You would understand.
The unsub who ran would be hard to find, Hotch knew that. He was good at hiding, it was what took them so long to track him down in the first place, and they wouldn’t have if it weren’t for the kid.
But there were others Hotch could take care of in the meantime. One in particular was just a few hours south. He could use a road trip.
+++
You didn’t tell anyone about your night with Aaron. You couldn’t. You were barely able to make sense of it in your own mind, let alone speak it out loud to someone else.
The way he handled you. It was different from before. His hands had changed.
You took the day off from work, telling Rossi you just needed to sleep. The last case exhausted you; that was all. He tried to press, but eventually let you go.
But you didn’t sleep. You slept after having sex with Aaron because you were past the point of exhaustion. You had no choice but to sleep, but now you weren’t tired enough. Your mind was still awake and running wild with questions.
You replayed the night over in your brain until it felt like it didn’t happen at all.
You laid on your couch, stared at the ceiling, and dozed. Remade the night in your head until it was a fantasy of what could’ve been if he had only let you in and let you love him in the first place.
Your phone rang and you wished it was Aaron, but knew it wasn’t. It was Penelope.
You rolled over, and let your voicemail answer.
+++
Hotch made good time driving south to North Carolina. Between energy drinks and chewing Excedrin, he barely needed to sleep at all. The four-hour drive breezed past, and soon he was sitting outside the unsub’s neighborhood, waiting.
He thought too much about you. Turning the radio as loud as it went did nothing to fight off the images of you that flashed before his eyes.
The previous version of him, before Foyet, would have called you instead of repeatedly searching the radio for something interesting. He always ended back up on the news, wanting to hear what was going on locally. Sometimes he checked national news, and sometimes he checked specific forums that he knew to watch, just in case he appeared there.
His stomach growled, and he cussed at it. He knew he should’ve eaten something before parking, but he couldn’t get this unsub off his mind. He’d eat after he handled this unsub. That was a deal he made for himself. He’d be hungry after this, and he needed to drive back to Quantico tonight, too. He couldn’t stay.
It took a few hours until Hotch saw the unsub’s car returning to the neighborhood. Hotch waited a few minutes before jumping out of his car and following.
With his gun tucked in the waistband of his jeans on his back, he knew what he had to do. He didn’t have as much time as he wanted with this unsub, but that was fine. He walked right up to his house, bypassing the open garage to ring the doorbell out front. The unsub answered with a confused greeting.
The ruse worked all the same. The unsub let Hotch into his house willingly, asking “Gideon” how he had been. How nice it was of him to check in. How the unsub had his life turned around.
Hotch waited until the unsub bent to grab drinks from the fridge. He shot him twice in the back of the head and neck, and left him there. The unsub lived alone, but someone would find out eventually. It wasn’t Hotch’s business.
He closed the garage and shut the lights off before he left. No one was home, after all.
+++
You went back to work after one day off. You needed to get off the couch and out of your apartment before you drove yourself insane with overthinking.
What the hell were you thinking? Going to Hotch’s place and going inside like that. Letting him do those things to you. No one could ever know about that. You knew that much. It had to remain a secret. You weren’t supposed to have any contact with him. You knew that, and you broke that rule. Foolishly. You knew better than that.
Penelope was the first to ask how you were doing. You swore she had special senses or something because she was waiting for you when you got off the elevator.
“Hey,” she called out, walking beside you, her heels clicking on the floor. “Rossi said you stayed home yesterday out of the blue. I tried calling you but it went to voicemail.”
“I know, I’m sorry Pen,” you tried to smile. “I was just really tired so I didn’t look at my phone or anything.”
“Okay,” she frowned. “Can I do anything? Tea? Do you want to get lunch together?”
“Sure,” you conceded, smiling genuinely then. “I’d love that. Let’s do lunch.”
“Awesome,” she grinned, her pink lipgloss sparkling with her smile. “I’m off to the cave. Come see me if you need anything, okay?”
You nodded. “I will, thanks Pen.”
Her concern worried you more than anything. You didn’t think you were that obvious with how bad you were doing. You thought you were hiding it well, but then again, there was never any hiding when working with profilers. Even Pen, who didn’t profile every day, still knew her friends extremely well and knew when something was wrong.
Everyone else knew, too. The second you walked through the glass doors, Emily was up and giving you a hug, asking if you felt any better. JJ followed and rubbed your back, asking if you wanted any coffee. Derek came over and gave a hug as well, and his stern look of worry. Reid waved from his desk and said it was glad to see you back.
“I was gone for one day,” you laughed, putting your purse down on your desk and plopping yourself down in your chair.
“It was kinda out of nowhere though,” Reid piped up. “Were you sick?”
“Sure,” you shrugged. “I was just exhausted, I think. I slept the whole day.”
“Were you avoiding something?”
“Reid,” Morgan warned. “Relax.”
Spencer grimaced. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay, don’t worry about it,” you shook your head. “Maybe I was, who knows? I’ll bring it up to my therapist,” you grinned, but none of them laughed. You cleared your throat. They stared back at you. “Why are you staring at me?”
“Nothing,” Emily said, shrugging, letting out a weak chuckle. “We all need therapists after the few months we’ve had.”
“You guys don’t have therapists?” Reid asked.
That got everyone to laugh.
“Oh, uh, by the way,” Morgan nudged your shoulder. “Rossi wanted to see you at some point today.”
“Okay…” He probably just wanted to check on you, but still, it unnerved you. “I’ll go get that over with now.”
You hauled yourself up and skipped up the stairs, bypassing Hotch’s office. You tried not to look at the door too long, but it startled you, seeing it empty. You kept walking, knocking on Rossi’s door and listening for him to invite you inside.
He opened the door for you, looking relieved to see that it was you. “Hey, come on in.”
You were welcomed inside and sat down on Rossi’s couch, and he took the seat next to you. You thought this meant that the conversation was a friendly check-in, but it verged away from friendly very quickly.
“Did you visit Aaron?”
You tried to keep your shock under control. “I did.”
“How was he?” Rossi asked.
“Good,” you lied. “I gave him some flowers. They seemed to cheer him up.”
“That’s good,” Rossi smiled softly. “How are you?”
“Fine,” you lied again, this time shrugging. “Moving on from it. Thanks for letting me have yesterday off. Resting really helped.”
Rossi waved his hand. “No need to thank me, but I’m glad it helped.” He paused, exhaling. “Strauss is worried about Aaron.”
“We all are,” you shrugged. “He’s been through a lot.”
“Yes, he has,” Rossi agreed. “But she’s…more concerned than we are, I’ll say. I was wondering if you wanted to shed some light on how he’s doing.”
“I mean, he…” You trailed off, fiddling with your hands. Should you say something? You didn’t care about betraying him. You did that when you first contacted Strauss. Betraying him wasn’t the issue.
It was admitting to yourself that something was wrong with him. Deeply. Enough to cause serious, genuine worry. Enough to intervene.
But what proof of that did you have? That he fucked you and kicked you out? You were not going to disclose that information, especially not to Rossi.
“He’s as good as you can expect him to be while grieving,” you finally said. “I think he’s fine.”
Rossi clearly did not believe you, but he let it go, and let you go back to your desk, which was completely fine with you.
You were saddled with paperwork that you didn’t do yesterday, and more because apparently new Use of Force reports are due. When are they not due?
Lunchtime rolled around slowly, and you sprung up from your desk like you were on a trampoline when Penelope came waltzing through the doors.
She laughed when she saw you were already standing. “Normally I have to pry you from your desk.”
“I’m starving,” you said. It was a half-lie. “Where are we eating?”
“Wherever you want,” she linked your arm in hers. “Anyone else want to join? JJ?”
JJ walked past briskly, shaking her head. “Can’t, sorry, sorting through some files.” She bounded the steps to the second level, pausing to lean over the railing. “I’ve misplaced a couple-- It’s not a big deal, they’re probably just buried under everything, but still. Thanks though.” She breezed into Rossi’s office and shut the door.
Pen blinked. “Okay.” She gave you a weird look and you returned it. “Any other takers?”
Reid was mid-bite of his usual PB&J, and Emily and Morgan were on the phone, shaking their heads.
You and Pen left the BAU alone, preparing for an ultimate girls lunch. Complete with food and gossip. Except, you weren’t in the mood for gossip because all Pen wanted to know about was Hotch. Before you even ordered food, Pen started with the questions.
“Okay, obviously something happened, because you never go off the grid like that.” She leaned forward on the table. “What happened yesterday?”
“Nothing happened,” you insisted. Because technically, it was the day before. Not that that even remotely mattered. “I was just tired.”
“Did you go see Hotch?”
Your eyes widened. “Penelope.”
“I knew it!” she cheered quietly. “I knew it! You two were too close when he was here, I knew you’d keep in touch.”
“We haven’t exactly kept in touch,” you replied. “He refuses to speak to me.” Technically the truth. He did refuse to speak to you. He might have fucked you, but there was no talking involved. Barely any.
“What?”
“I went to his apartment with some flowers to apologize and wish him well but he… He refused to speak to me,” you shrugged. “I mean, he took the flowers, but we barely spoke, and I left.” You kept your eyes down on your drink, swirling your straw, hoping you came across as ashamed and not a liar.
“Oh, babe…” Penelope rested her hand on yours. “I am so sorry. You really liked him.”
“I did,” you exhaled through a small laugh, then shook your head. “But it’s fine. Other fish in the sea, and all that. Not to mention,” you lowered your voice, “he’s my boss, Pen. What was I thinking?”
“Uh, you were thinking how hot it is,” she replied, her voice just above a whisper, but she was grinning. “It’s fine to have fantasies! Don’t beat yourself up over it.” She squeezed your hand.
“Thanks, Pen,” you smiled, squeezing her hand back. “Now. What are we thinking for food? I really am starving.”
+++
Hotch was just about to head out to find another unsub when his phone began ringing. He sighed heavily and spun around, hoping it wasn’t you, because the last thing he wanted to do was deal with you any more. It turned out to be Rossi.
“Hey Dave,” Aaron made sure to smile as he said it, hoping that translated in his tone. “What’s up?”
“Oh, nothing much,” Rossi sighed. “The usual. What are you up to?”
Aaron set his duffle bag down gently. Rossi never called for no reason. “Was just about to head on a short run,” Aaron said.
“Running a lot lately, huh?”
“Yeah,” Aaron chuckled, suddenly worried. Was Rossi onto him? How was he supposed to know? He felt ridiculous, being a profiler and unable to tell what Rossi was feeling. “It’s been good for uh…coping, you know. I don’t know,” he laughed. “I probably sound stupid.”
“Not at all,” Dave replied. “I won’t keep you. I just had one quick question.”
There it is. “Sure, what is it?”
“JJ is missing a few files, and I was just wondering if you might have them. The Holman case, the Goodman case, and a few others.”
“Holman?” Hotch asked. “Wasn’t he killed a few days ago?” Only a few days ago…what happened to the time?
“Yeah,” Dave sighed. “Anyway, take a look through your office after your run and give me a call, deal?”
“Deal,” Hotch said, smiling again. “I’ll talk to you later.”
“See ya,” Dave replied. “Don’t give yourself a stroke.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Hotch laughed. “Bye.”
Hotch sighed, setting his phone on the counter. This next unsub had to wait until the next day. Hotch had files to burn.
154 notes · View notes
vinestaffery · 4 months ago
Note
Hi, I don't request much but could you write skateboard reacting to reader coming out as non-binary, I understand if you don't want to its fine. Have a good day ^^
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skateboard x non-binary reader
content: coming out; implied homophobia experiences/homophobia; comfort and acceptance; purely fluff with a side of small angst
authors note: last post for tonight!!! so sorry for this being unable to be written in so long. hope this cheers you up!!
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[Y/N] paced back and forth in their room, the low hum of the ceiling fan doing little to ease their anxiety. The walls, plastered with posters of their favorite bands and vibrant artwork, seemed to close in on them. Their heart pounded, each beat echoing the countless scenarios their mind conjured. Skateboard had always been a steady presence in their life, a beacon of carefree energy and unwavering friendship. But this was different. This was revealing a part of themselves they had kept hidden for so long, a truth that lay heavy on their chest.
Memories flashed through [Y/N]'s mind like a cruel montage. They remembered the hushed whispers in the school hallways, the way eyes would linger a little too long, and the snickers that followed them whenever they tried to express themselves authentically. The worst were the snide comments, the offhand remarks that cut deeper than any physical wound.
"What even are they?" "Are they confused or just seeking attention?"
The words replayed in their mind, a relentless loop of doubt and fear.
Taking a deep breath, [Y/N] grabbed their phone and texted Skateboard. "Hey, can we talk? It's important." The response was almost immediate, typical of Skateboard's quick, effortless style. "Sure thing! Meet you at the park in 10?"
[Y/N] arrived at the park, the familiar sight of Skateboard waiting by the bench, his skateboard resting against his leg, brought a semblance of calm. His nonchalant grin and easygoing demeanor were a stark contrast to the turmoil raging within [Y/N]. They took a deep breath, steeling themselves for the conversation ahead.
"Hey, [Y/N]!" Skateboard greeted them with his usual enthusiasm. "What's up?" [Y/N] swallowed hard, their mouth suddenly dry. "Hey, Skateboard. There's something I need to tell you. It's...it's really important to me."
Skateboard's expression softened slightly, a flicker of concern crossing his features. "Sure thing, dude. You know you can tell me anything."
As they began to speak, [Y/N] felt a surge of emotions. "I've been struggling with something for a long time. I’ve never felt comfortable with the gender I was assigned at birth. I’m non-binary. I use they/them pronouns."
The words hung in the air, heavy and liberating all at once. [Y/N] braced themselves for the response, their mind racing with worst-case scenarios. Would Skateboard laugh it off, dismiss it as a phase, or worse, distance himself from them?
But Skateboard did none of those things. Instead, he looked at [Y/N] with a mix of surprise and understanding. "Wow, [Y/N]. Thanks for telling me. That must have taken a lot of courage."
[Y/N] blinked, taken aback by the sincerity in his voice. "You...you’re okay with it?"
Skateboard shrugged, a small smile playing on his lips. "Why wouldn’t I be? You're my friend, and I want you to be happy and comfortable. It doesn't change who you are to me."
A wave of relief washed over [Y/N], the tension that had coiled in their chest unraveling. Skateboard stepped forward, wrapping them in a tight hug. The embrace was warm, grounding, and filled with the unspoken promise of acceptance.
"You know, I used to be somewhat like that, struggling to discover myself. That was until I discovered it was the happiness I was seeking for? It was inside me. In accepting mysef, my true authentic self, I discovered happiness. I finally didn't feel alone, I acknowledged my friends that loved and accepted me for who I was as a person, not who they felt I should be. Even in uncovering my authentic self, I still felt like I was unable to be who I am. But, if you fight beside them, you can live a wonderful life where you don't need to hide. You have always been you, and no one should tell you otherwise."
"...Thanks, Skateboard,"
[Y/N] whispered, their voice thick with emotion. "You have no idea how much this means to me."
Skateboard pulled back, his grin widening. "No problem at all. Now, how about we go skateboarding? I’ve been working on some new tricks I want to show you."
[Y/N] laughed, the sound lighter and freer than it had been in a long time. "I'd love that."
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wyvnspng · 6 months ago
Text
Mum said it’s my turn on the writing.
Ty to my good friend @cleminthewriter for beta reading
Also posted to ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/56113669
Theo pulled his jacket closer to his body in hopes of warming himself up ever so slightly. Predictably, the soaked fabric did little to fend off the cold.
He eyed his best friend, Archie, who was stumbling around, the single umbrella that was supposed to be shared between them both was protecting them from the rain.
“..so they bring around their dog, which was massive! A uh- Idunno the breed, but it was fluffy and white. Anyway, they get the dog to uh, I guess to intimidate us? But the dog was a total sweetheart, we got to pet it.” He finished, and laughed. Theo laughed alongside them.
“Bet Jess found that to be great fun? You should invite her over sometime, I heard she’s learning how to play the piano.” Theo added, glancing at his friend's shoes, which were soaked with mud from where they’d jumped into all the puddles they’d come across.
Archie, expectedly, agreed. They always enjoyed the opportunity to hang out with his two favourite people (both his sister and his best friend!)
Theo shivered at both the cold and the uncomfortable sensation of being soaked by the rain. Luckily, they weren’t too far from their shared apartment, which was probably the biggest reason why they weren’t asking Archie to share the umbrella. He looked down the dark street, illuminated only by the dull light from whatever street lights were still working. It was an eerie sight, and made him want to hurry his pace slightly.
He didn’t, though, because then he’d be leaving Archie behind. He brushed off the mild fear he felt and remained by their side. Archie had run out of things to talk about, and the atmosphere had fallen into a calm silence, which was only broken by the sound of the rain, the buzzing of streetlights, and their own footsteps.
They walked together for a while, enjoying the simple silence, the long day out having sapped them of their energy. Theo was excited to get home and change into some clean and dry clothes before curling up into the warmth of his bed and drifting off into a cosy slumber.
His thoughts were interrupted by a dull crash and a groan, which came from the street obscured by the corner of a building. Archie also noticed, judging by how their head turned toward the sound. Thankfully, he didn’t say anything.
Peeking around the building, Theo managed to make out a familiar face. Curious, he made his way over, and offered a hand so they could get off of the floor.
“Alex! It’s been a while! How’ve you been?” He greeted his old acquaintance, who accepted the hand and got up from where they had clearly slipped and fallen over. Archie approached the two, also curious about what’s going on.
“Oh uh-“ They nervously looked off to the side. “It really has been, huh? It’s been good I suppose- I’ve been quite busy these days.” Theo glanced to the side, where Alex kept looking, and could briefly make out some weird lights that disappeared as soon as his brain registered them. He must be more tired than he thought.
Looking back at Alex, he could hear Archie speak up from behind him. “Oh yeah! I saw your wanted poster!” They giggled, and Alex looked at them nervously. “What’d you do anyway? I never took you to be the type to break the law and evade arrest!”
Alex lowered their head, and nervously fiddled with the corner of their wet jacket. “Oh, not much, just- yknow- the usual.” Theo did, infact, not know. However, he did know that Alex was acting very out of character here. They’d done lots of weird and potentially dangerous stuff back in highschool, a lot of which Theo had been there to witness, and they had never acted this nervous. They must have done something really bad.
Archie didn’t pick up on this, and continued. “Wow! Did you steal something?” Alex opened their mouth to reply, but Archie gasped and added more on before they could. “Did you kill someone? I didn’t think you’d have it in you to do something like that!”
Immediately, Alex did not look as nervous. “What? Why would I kill someone?” Archie just shrugged in response.
“You never know with this stuff! Even the nicest people can kill if they find a reason!” Alex just frowned.
“Well, I didn’t kill anyone.” They glanced to the side again, and wiped down their front, as if trying to get rid of the water.
Archie opened their mouth to say something, but Theo cut him off before they unintentionally caused offence. “Is everything alright? You aren’t, like, starving on the streets or anything, right?” Alex just shrugged.
“I’m doing alright. It’s sort of complicated, I guess.” They took a few steps backward. “Speaking of, I should get going. I have stuff to do.” Alex didn’t wait for a response before sprinting down the street.
Theo briefly considered running after them, but decided against it. Whatever they were doing, it was probably best that they stayed out of it, lest their faces also end up on wanted posters.
A quiet thump, followed by some louder scratching sounds, came from the alley that Alex had been staring at, causing both Theo and Archie to flinch. Theo, being braver than Archie, made his way over and lit the alley up with the small flashlight he carried around. There was nothing of interest in the alley, except for large scratches that went up the wall.
Theo shivered, and Archie let out a shaky breath from behind him. There was definitely something in here, and whatever it was is gone. Whether that’s a good or bad thing is something only time will tell.
Still a little shaken up, Theo and Archie make their way back to their shared apartment as fast as possible. It’s only when they’ve returned home, and Theo is taking a warm shower, does he think back to that alley and consider that Alex was aware that something was in it.
Theo can only hope that whatever that thing was won’t hurt Alex.
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chlorinecake · 11 months ago
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your first impression of your moots and your impression now?
took me a while to get to this but here’s my long asf answer 🐈‍⬛
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@angel1kisses ✮⋆˙ idk, something abt her blog jst INSTANTLY captivated me, like… even before I saw what she looked like, I knew she’d be a baddie 😏 in simple word tho, jst think of every high school stereotype (minus jock) but in one person. that’s how chaotic her energy was to me 😭 and it’s the same way now… gotta love my random and smexy wifey huhu 🤭
@nikisdubblchococake ✮⋆˙ meme material. she had an asian santa pfp when I first saw her account 😭 so I figured she would have an interesting sense of humor. she also used a lot of slang and meme references whenever we texted, but I just loved her energy from the beginning, and I knew we’d end up being really close friends like we are now 🫶 my copium 💯
@minhosimthings ✮⋆˙ okay so… mona left an interesting first impression on me… I was honestly a bit intimidated by her in the beginning 😳?? I just didn’t feel worthy/brave enough to talk to her at first 😭 like… she had a very quirky, mysterious, and boss bitch vibe all around ~~ but when I finally got to know her, she’s literally such a sweetheart :( like Ik we’re partners in crime but she seriously stole my heart… ❤️‍🩹 my jagi… all mine 🫂
@starrywonie ✮⋆˙ y’all. I’m abt to embarrass the hell out of myself when I saw this, but I was literally OBSESSED with Nana when I first found her page (way before I started writing myself) ~ like, i honestly thought she was older than me bc I just looked up to her as THE Jungwon fan page. now after getting to know her tho, she’s literally a walking wonie 🥲 the cutest bby ever 🫶
@candewlsy ✮⋆˙ okay soooooooo, i didn’t really have a first impression of Mizu bc as soon as I discovered her blog, we were talking and texting on discord the next day 🤪 !! but from that, i can say she has a very lovable and sociable nature… always willing to learn more abt a person while also sharing things abt herself... can't forget how much she loves her cowboys, too 🤠
@wonfilez ✮⋆˙ i discovered her blog during my yandere phase and boy when I tell you she had me hooked with "beautiful monster" 🫠 I just admired how talented of a writer she was (even though that was the only work I'd read by her at the time, it was enough to make me a fan 😭)... aside from the past though, once I finally got to meet her, I admired her bubbly personality 🫶
@enmayz ✮⋆ ˙ I just never felt confident/worthy enough to speak to or even follow Mira 😭 ... just from seeing the way she'd talk about her moots on her blog, I could immediately tell she had such a beautiful soul, and anyone close to her was literally so lucky, like- now tho? don't even get me started on her voice... her looks... her charisma ??? the girl just slays, I tell you...
@jaylaxies ✮⋆˙ enhabler's disney princess right here ☝️. I don't know what it is abt Aria, but she just radiates such royal energy??? like, as crazy as it sounds, I'm pretty sure she sparkles like diamonds or smth, bc she's literally a celebrity. an ICON, I tell you. but aside from my fangirling, she really is a sweetheart. very humble, very chill... yeah, she just slays like that 😌
@hoondrop ✮⋆˙ intimidating part 2. I always felt like a peasant whenever I saw Moon’s blog, like- it seemed disrespectful for me to even scroll through her posts 🤡 idk if it was just the aesthetic of her page, but she genuinely seemed ethereal to me. and even now after speaking with her a few times, she’s like an older sister 🥲 cool, chill, while still being relatable, just in a mature sense 🫠
@takiberry ✮⋆˙ miss renè... from the day she followed me, I didn't even bother checking out her blog because I HAD ALREADY BEEN STALKING NGL 🤡 she just seemed so vibey from the way she responded to her fans, plus, not a lot of creators on here write abt &team, so I was like, yes, let's be friends !! now tho, I see her as the lucky friend... blessed with good looks, a sweet personality and the opportunity to talk to ej 🥲 she's just THAT girl ~~
@rowretro ✮⋆˙ even though we just became moots closer towards the end of this year, I had to include Rowan on this list because she's just so cool and bubbly, and I've already had sm fun getting to know this cutie patootie over the past few days and I can’t wait for our friendship to blossom as time goes on :)
@squoxle ✮⋆˙ this beeyatch just gets on my nerves, honestly... from the moment I saw her as a baby in the hospital, I knew she would be the death of my 9 month streak of peace. but to look on the bright side... actually? there is no bright side 😔 only darkness... my impression of her remains the same, tho. she stinks, she's ugly, and HELLA annoying XD
@microwvdstrawb3rri3s ✮⋆˙ when I first saw her account, I didn't really form an opinion abt her bc I saw her as a follower than anything. but once we started talking more frequently, I swear she's like the cutest little sister ever 🥲 so endearing, energetic, and sweet... like, it genuinely makes my day every time I see one of her silly asks or just a random "hello" message in my dms !!
@cheruluv ✮⋆˙ if I'm remembering correctly, I first met Iya when she asked abt one of my yandere fics, so I just assumed right out the gate that she'd have more of an edgy personality, but when I actually got to know her, she's such a ray of comfort ❤️‍🩹. I mean, she's literally a human version of a my little pony character. just so nice and friendly all the time... 🫠
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Side Note: This year has been TRASH to say the least (won’t get into the details because the haters are waiting to celebrate my misfortune)… But ever since I started this blog in early August, I’ve never felt happier, like…. ever 🤑!!! So I just wanna thank all of my precious mooties for literally just existing (?) and getting me through some of the toughest moments in my life this year… obviously I’m religious, so I gotta give credit to the LORD too 🧎‍♀️ but knowing you guys is such a slay for me. Legit feels like I’m winning at life… but anyway, Happy New Year to all of you lovelies 🫶🫶🫶 and special thanks to @ashgonedash (the original gangster... kudos to this queen for requesting blood on ice 🫡), and @yourmomscuntis2tighy (my highness... MEGA props for coming up with the convenient chances plot, like HELLO???)... these two girls have supported my goofy ahh blog since the beginning, and I will always remember y’all baddies for that :3 Take care and stay safe !! MUAH 😽 Love, Chloé 🩵
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tomsdonutdealer · 21 days ago
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Jaiden kinda sucks.
I’m making a post about this from the pure fact nobody seems to be talking about it, and while I’ll try to take an open standpoint this is entirely my opinion.
The categories:
Aiden (S2 overview)
James (S2 overview)
Jaiden in AS and S2
Let’s begin
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SEASON 2: AIDEN
Where do I even begin on how dirty Aiden was done this season. He’s seen to be a kindhearted, slightly stubborn, twinkish guy who’s quick to form a grudge against James, but he’s compassionate enough to suddenly hop into Lake’s storyline to tell her that her parents are fucked (I don’t know why they had Aiden do this frankly, any character could’ve).
This post isn’t about how awful his writing is, but for a character that’s supposed to be kind and friendly, he’s around James way too much. All of his most memorable scenes are him being pissy at James, and out of context that victimises James WAY too much. James is way too glorified in the overall Jaiden plot.
SEASON 2: JAMES
I’ve already said it, but I’ll happily say it again. James is way too victimised in Season 2. He’s in general just an awful person, who’s development was rushed and purely for the sake of yaoi. Way to go, DC writing team, you made another ship into fetish content.
I’ll properly go through my main and infamous problem with him in the Jaiden section, but holy shit this man is insufferable, they were way too desperate to give him himbo energy.
I think the fandom can be blatantly misogynistic with who they call murderer on this season. Riya attempted murder, so did Yul, and James was the closest one to succeeding! If you call Yul an attempted murderer, James is just as, if not even more guilty. He took part in the plan against Aiden, mind you. He only seems like a hero because in the end he attempts to murder someone else. I hate Yul as much as the next Gabby or Grett fan, but yikes, the fandom got over that much too fast.
Season 2: Jaiden
Holy shit, there’s so much to cover. I think we may as well start with the most infamous scene that fuels both my James and Jaiden hate, and if it wasn’t obvious by now…
If the video doesn’t speak paragraphs for itself, this is blatant sexual assault. Sexual assault James gets no reprimanding for. It was another scene where they’re trying to present Aiden as an innocent twink who gets mad at James over small things, but frankly that was an underreaction, Aiden has balls to not drag his ass..
The first kiss wasn’t sexual assault, Aiden consented to the bare minimum. James pulling Aiden back in when he physically resisted IS sexual assault. I see a LOT of James fans (a certain youtuber who had controversy on X before proceeding to apologise then not change the slightest bit) try and excuse this with ‘Oh, the person who wrote it is weird!!’ or ‘Ah, let’s just pretend it doesn’t exist because it’s weird!’ While they’re not wrong, since presumably Carazar Zone wrote the kiss challenge in, the scene exists. The scene is canon, and you’re ignoring and defending sexual assault. You’re the Melaine fans of the DC fandom I fear..
The rest of the season goes relatively the same, James gets Aiden to forgive him, James fucks up, Aiden gets mad, and the cycle repeats. This is the most stupid trope to ever exist, no wonder Season 2 gets so much shit. With this cycle, really they shouldn’t of gotten together by the end of Season 2. That’s a setup for a disgustingly unhealthy relationship. Fuck this season, fuck Jaiden, fuck that bitchass motherfucker James🔥😭
ALL STARS: JAIDEN
In all honesty, this season would’ve been way more interesting if Aiden still had his brain from early S2 so he didn’t get with James and was still fucking mad at him, meanwhile TomJake was the side yaoi relationship that’s going impossibly well for how repeated the dynamic was.
Not only would Aiden have a justified reason to be mad at James (sexual assault, joining an attempted murder plan, using him for followers multiple times, etc), but it would make sense for James to be a first boot if no one there fucking liked him. Even then, if you move around the placements in all the seasons so James has Tom’s AS elimination spot and Aiden has Jake’s, it’d still be much more watchable, since they have reason to hold a grudge.
I love Tom, I love his autism coded, I fucking hate his child design but I forgive him, but it was never actually explained on why he didn’t at least send a dry ‘ok’ to Jake. Jake however, I will defend until I’m buried in the fucking pits of hell, that man has BPD, and that man had completely justified reactions because of that. I fucking love and hate both of them, they didn’t need that much focus.
Obviously the writing team didn’t do this, so we’re stuck with the reality of them being a happy and presumably healthy couple. I love All Stars Jaiden, a lot. I hate Jaiden in the context that Season 2 is canon and not just a bad dream. If Jaiden was just an out of the pocket ship they introduced in the first episode of All Stars, similar to YulGrett, I’d be all for it, because holy shit their colour palettes compliment each other, but they weren’t, we digress I suppose.
hope you enjoyed my little rant
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