#source: Josh Kennedy on vine

[detroitbecomeonline]

Hey thanks for the rb you made of my textpost, it made me feel special and all that. The source is a Josh Kennedy vine btw, check him out cause he’s really funny and also makes up like 99% of my textposts 😂

I hope your pillow is at the exact fluffiness you like it at when you go to sleep tonight and here is a link to some Josh Kennedy vines (peep 1:25) that I binged after you sent me this ask <3

[incorrect-oddworld-quotes]

Humphrey: Alright, Gabbit, the sonar in your head should be-

Munch: What?! I got a sonar in mah head?!

Humphrey: wHaT? I interrupt people?!

Munch:

Humphrey: ...Yes!

[theenbynightingale]

Alejandro: If we were the only ones left on this planet, what would you do first.

Heather: I’d break up with you.

Alejandro: What!?

Heather: I’m not trying to impress anyone anymore.

[scott-the-woz-as-vines]

Abe: Got diagnosed with Cool Guy Syndrome yesterday, huhah!

Abe: So now I take... Adderall, huhah!

[the-skull-breaker]

ANE Lance : *pops into the past* ... I'm you from the futur... ?

TO Lance : YEAH OBVIOUSLY, BITCH !

ANE Lance : I don't... I don't remember talking like that...

[youngsap]

*At Scarlemagne’s Funeral*

Wolf: Can I just have a moment alone with him?

Wolf, harshly whispering: Alright, listen faker. I know you’re not actually dead.

Scarlemagne, opening his eyes: YEAH, NO SHIT.

[incorrectstevesagaquotes]

Galaxy Steve, in Reality Steve’s mind: Yo dude, we can talk through minds now, so we’ll be in each other’s heads...

Reality Steve: ...Forever!

Galaxy Steve: Exactly, sucker.

Reality Steve:

Reality Steve: Oh no.

[koko-heads]

louise, at tammy’s funeral: can i have a moment alone with her?

jocelyn: of course *leaves*

louise: now listen, i know you’re not really dead.

tammy: yeah no shit-

[marinetteplztakeabreak]

Hawkmoth, attempting to get support from the media:Hey everybody, today Chat Noir pushed me so I’m starting a kickstarter to put him down. The benefits of killing him would be I would get pushed way less-

Mayura: *in the background with a powerpoint presentation and graphs*

[incorrect-voltron-quotess-blog]

Pidge: hey everybody today my brother pushed me so im starting a kickstarter to put him down

Pidge: the benefits of killing him would be i would get pushed way less

[skautism]

Elmer: My mom says if I don't get my grades up she isn't going to let me get my tetanus shot next year

JoJo: That's weird, what're you gonna do?

Elmer: Fuckin' study I guess

[fuckyeahscienceparty]

Medic, wearing sunglasses, sipping wine out of a glass with a curly straw: What up, I'm Medic, I'm 43, and I never actually went to medical school.

[theenbynightingale]

Dakota: Hey, guys. This is my boss, Chris.

Chris: What up, internet?

Sam: Why are you doing a livestream with your boss?

Dakota: He said if I didn’t, I’m fired.

Chris: No, I didn’t- I didn’t say that.

[scott-the-woz-as-vines]

Wendy's Employee: That awkward moment when you're tryna take a shit. And your brother's just kickin' in the bathroom.

Target Employee: I'm single!

[anice-meme]

Joel: Um, Ellie, could you swim across that lake?

Ellie: No I cannot.

Ellie: What up, I'm Ellie, I'm 14, and I never fuckin' learned how to swim

[overheardparx]

jawn, to his friends: hey guys this is my boss, awsten

awsten, nervous: hahah sup boys

jawn's friends, whispering: uhh why do you hang out with your boss

jawn: he said if i dont im fired

awsten, sweating and nervous: nah i didnt-i didn't say that