#sorry to vent Again will delete in a bit

[lavampira]

:o)

[itty-bitty-sunshine]

This next week about to be the hardest one of my life moots i am not responsible for the person or lack of one im about to become because of that

[doodlingwren]

Hiatus

I am going on hiatus for a bit more. I really really hoped the stuff that have been going on lately were already "sorted out" but, uhm... they aren't. I need to take a bit more time offline once again, and try to work things out.

Thank you for your patience ❤

Wren

[magiefish]

The real question is, if I'm not weird and annoying, then why do people treat me like I'm weird and annoying wherever I go? Hm? Why's that? Dingus

[antifragi1e]

:/

[itsahotsecondafter]

thanking and cursing the universe for my accidental acting abilities

[jaime-in-chaos]

Sometimes I feel happy and then there are times I want to fucking rip my head off.

[koushirouizumi]

(VENT) Tw: Illness

Tw: Vomit

(YEAH)

So I'll admit I was more than a little irritated last night (mainly due to absolute sh*t attitudes and horrid fan entitlement behavior, up to and including horrid treatment aimed at fans of different parts of the franchise that I've been seeing around Digi-Twit since Mille ep dropped literally every time I try to check for decent things, seriously is basic decency towards other bloggers and fans not even a THING there anymore???) but that ASIDE.

Hi yes I'm still actually hyper-thyroidism and yes it's a genuine condition I have DIAGNOSED for 10+ years that I've mentioned off and on my blog since Tri era. I've had this diagnosed before Tri even dropped; yes I medicated for it as long as possible and overall that's helped (which is why I rb a lot more about Aut!issues) but I still experience symptoms off and on at times even when medicating, especially when my levels fluctuate really suddenly (I've talked about that before TOO...)

Anyway I was trying to take tylenol for physical pain earlier (which may or may not be unrelated, really bad stiffness all over basically etc) and basically threw up almost immediately after (I had taken tylenol abt 4 hrs before) I'm usually great at keeping tylenol down and 4 hrs is usually when it's wearing off for me as of lately (it tends to wear off faster in recent years) but hahaaa either I took it too early this time or I may genuinely have a stomach virus (C.O.V.I.D??? Who knows but I'm NOT running fever, sense of smell is fine, no sinus issues or chest specific pain atm etc it was more all over elsewhere,,, temp's actually low including right after that happened and this is very average for me, I typically have low temp especially early in morning and at night as of recent last 10~ years since thyroid diagnosis and I have NO idea why, since I did get fevers off and on as a tiny kid, but well)

I'll take a test in the morning (fortunately we still have some of the free ones) but so far last couple times I tried one in past months it came back negative each time.

After this thing tonight happened I did start feeling a bit better (still some irritation), but this has been a chronic issue ongoing 12~24 hours now with off-and-on pain cycles so who knows how much longer this is gonna last

Anyway when I say to people who rudely act like that towards other fans BACK OFF AND GIVE ME SOME SPACE this is what I MEAN because my f*cking health is way more important than ANYTHING TO DO WITH DigiAdvs, 02, or anything else fan wise and I'd put every single project I've planned on hold effective immeditely if it meant taking care of myself during an instance like this

Blogs will be on auto-queue until I feel better enough to re blog again but expect a LOT of Disabled P.S.A posts to come since Yes This Topic Is Important To Me And I'm NOT Ever Going To Stop rbng awareness about it OK Thanks

[meliohy]

.

[noxtivagus]

OH NO

[barcaatthemoon]

the truth ii || jenni hermoso x reader ||

the aftermath of your breakdown.

jenni found herself walking back to the hotel soon after alexia took you away. mapi would probably kick her ass in the morning for everything, but jenni had been waiting for that moment to come. she had expected punches to come flying her way when she came back from mexico, but it seemed that you had kept quiet about the break up. you had even kept quiet when you had to stand by and watch as jenni buried herself in between the legs of various women to distract herself from you.

"ale, open up," jenni said as she knocked on your hotel room door. she had expected to find alexia watching over you for the night, and was partially shocked to see ona and patri there instead. "where is alexia?"

"she's getting some things for (y/n), who has been very chatty by the way," ona warned. jenni knew from the silence and tension radiating from patri that you told them what happened. jenni couldn't think of anything to say to defend herself.

"i'm sorry." jenni stood awkwardly at the door, hoping that one of them would let her in. "i didn't know what happened at first, but eventually it started to come back in bits and pieces."

"jenni, go back to your own room," alexia said as she pushed past jenni to get into your room.

"i want to talk to you," jenni said. alexia gave the younger players a nod as she put the thing she had bought for you in their arms. jenni stepped into the hallway with alexia, who lost her cool once the door was shut. jenni hadn't expected the outburst from alexia, who despite her poor temper, had gotten it under control as she came into the position of captain.

"how could you let me treat her like that? you knew what you did, jenni. we loved and supported you unconditionally, all the while you were the own cause of your sadness. if you would have gotten over yourself, the two of you could have been married by now!" alexia's voice was raised and her hands were fisted around the collar of jenni's shirt. jenni was backed against the wall, just waiting for the inevitable punch to come from alexia's fist. "they shut her out because we all thought she broke your heart and ran."

"i'm sorry," jenni apologized. alexia let go of her, unable to look at jenni for a second longer. "this is a mess, and it's all my fault. i don't know how to fix it."

"you'll be damn lucky if any of us can fix this. because of you, we all hurt her too. if you would have just told the fucking truth, none of this would have happened. you didn't mean any of that, not even in the message," alexia said. jenni froze at the mention of the voicemail. her face fell immediately.

"y-you heard the voicemail?" jenni felt like all of the air had been forced out of her lungs as alexia nodded her head. she had expected you to delete it. a night of drinking had coaxed jenni into venting to you about the breakup and all the things she had said. the only issue was that jenni was full of misplaced anger, and every terrible thing she felt about herself had been directed at you instead. "i didn't mean any of that about (y/n). it as about me, it was always about me."

"just get the hell out of here for now," alexia said. she was at a loss as to what she should have done. she knew that jenni hadn't meant any of that towards you, but that didn't change the fact that she had said it. nothing would ever be able to change the fact that she had said it, and despite the fact that alexia knew both of you still loved each other deeply, she wasn't sure that she was comfortable letting you go back to jenni after everything. it could only be a matter of time before she got fucked up again, leaving you to go through the whole ordeal once more.

…

slowly over the course of the next few days, the team seemed to warm up to you again. ona and patri had refused to leave your side, both of them apologizing for icing you out profousely. in all honesty, you knew that you should have been mad at them, but you were far too relieved to have friends again to care. even better than that, you were glad to no longer have to avoid your captain or the players you used to look to for guidance.

"i don't know if this is really your thing, but i was going to go with some of the girls to a candy store. i've heard a lot about it online, it's supposed to be pretty cool," mapi said as she stood awkwardly in front of your seat. you had eaten breakfast with ona, patri, and pina. it was nice, aside from the fact that jenni spent the whole morning in the corner by herself, not even sitting at a table. you had been mad at her, but you still didn't want her to be shut out by the team like you were.

"yeah, that sounds good. maybe you should ask jenni too, i bet she'd like to come," you tried to suggest. mapi gave you a look as she sat down across from you. "she's been your friend longer than i've been here. longer than any of you have known i existed. remember that i knew it was risky dating her with the age gap."

"yes, but jenni knows what she did. has she even apologized to you?" mapi asked. you shrugged. technically, there had been quite a few apologies, but none of them had been very good. jenni's sincerity had been wasted away because of your anger, and by the time you were willing to hear her out, she was mad at you.

"it's complicated, mapi. even after everything, i still love her and that's got to mean something," you reasoned.

"yeah, it means you're young. i'd stay away from her if i was you," mapi warned. you nodded in understanding, but chose not to say anything. mapi wandered off to gather up a few more girls to go to the candy store with you, which was when you took your opportunity to sneak back to your room. all you had wanted was a little time to process your thoughts, but nobody wanted to leave you alone.

you understood patri and ona being clingy, especially ona, but it was still rough on you. being alone had become your norm in germany, and while your contract was coming up soon, you weren't sure if you wanted to go back to barcelona. alexia had been pushing for it, which was part of why you had agreed to go out with mapi today instead. mapi had been the one to listen to you talk about the different club options silently yesterday. alexia had been loud, giving you a million reasons why barcelona was better than all of the other ones.

"shit, sorry. i can wait," jenni said as she walked over to the elevators. you didn't look over towards her, not even as the doors opened. you stepped inside first. jenni just stood there until you held the door open for her, indicating that you didn't mind her coming in too. "are you sure?"

"no, but you should come here anyway," you told her. jenni cracked a small smile as she stepped into the elevator with you. it was a little awkward at first, and even more so when you looked over to find her staring at you. "you didn't have to sit on the floor at breakfast today. i'm sure someone would have sat with you."

"not a chance. if we didn't have more games, i'd be back in mexico already," jenni admitted. she had planned on staying an extra couple of weeks in spain to spend with friends and family. you didn't like the idea of her abandoning that because of that happened with you. "i saw on instagram that you're going to be a free agent soon. i didn't think you had signed such a short contract."

"alexia wants me to come back to barcelona, but i'm not sure. i haven't told ona or patri that jona wants me back yet. god, she'll be so mad if i don't come back," you sighed. jenni cautiously reached out and placed her hand on your back. "you really made a mess of things for me."

"i made a mess of things for both of us, and i am so sorry. those things i said, i wasn't talking about you when i said them. i was talking about me," jenni admitted. your brows furrowed as you stared at her. "i hadn't thought much about how it would look at first, and then it was pushed into my head so i couldn't think of anything else. i never thought to ask you if you thought i was taking advantage of you. i mean, it all happened so fast at first."

"would you have ever asked me out if we didn't get drunk and sleep together?" you asked. jenni bit her lip awkwardly as she rubbed the back of her neck. "tell me. i want to hear the truth jenni."

"no, nothing would have ever happened if that first night didn't. i wouldn't have let you keep coming over, but i think i still would have loved you. i wouldn't have gotten nervous when you kissed me at alexia's, so i wouldn't have thrown up everywhere on the balcony. you wouldn't have had to drive me back to my place to take care of me, and i wouldn't have asked you to move in with me," jenni admitted. "i wouldn't have been 32 with a 19 year old girlfriend. we wouldn't have to tell the team, and patri wouldn't have ever fucking gotten in my face about us, so i wouldn't have come back home and yelled at you like that. so, i am sorry that i didn't have any fucking control, but i don't regret sleeping with you one bit."

"i don't either," you whispered. jenni glanced over at you with a small smile on her face. it didn't do much to hide the tears in her eyes or the way that her voice had been shaking as she recounted the things that wouldn't have happened if you hadn't slept with jenni for the first time.

"you should. you should be angrier with me than you are. i know that i can't stand myself when someone mentions you." jenni sank back into herself a little. you knew that jenni being upset and genuine about the breakup should have made you feel better, but it only made you feel worse. "thank you for listening to me."

"can i talk now?" you asked jenni. she nodded and you pressed the emergency stop button on the elevator. "sit down."

jenni did exactly as you asked, sliding down the wall to sit. you sat down across from her with your legs crossed. it was a habit that alexia and mapi got onto you for because it was truly terrible for your knees. jenni had never gotten onto you for things like they did, she had always gently corrected you, if she ever did. jenni liked being your girlfriend much more than she liked being an authority figure or mentor.

"if you would have talked to me about what was bothering you back then, i could have helped. i could have reassured you that you weren't taking advantage of me. i could have reminded you that every step of the way, i resisted through your persistence that it wasn't right. i could have reminded you that i wanted this so badly that i used to stay up all night trying to figure out how the hell i was going to be around you the next day," you told her.

jenni pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them, balling herself up a bit. you could see the nervous little twitch in her fingers that she tried to hide. despite what you knew was in your best interests, you reached out and took jenni's hand. almost immediately, the floodgates opened up for her and she launched herself into your arms.

"i don't think that we can do this again jenni, i really don't," you sighed. jenni glanced up at you, her makeup now smeared all over your shirt. "mapi was right, i can't just take you back. i want to so badly, and i know that i love you, but i need to love someone else. i can't run back to you, jenni, i just can't."

"oh, okay," jenni said as she stood up. you sighed as you watched her flip the elevator switch again, despite you not really being done. you had more to say, but it was obvious in the way that jenni shook as she stood there that she was on the verge of breaking down. it wasn't your job to comfort her, so she wouldn't subject you to watching that.

she stopped the elevator at the next floor, which definitely wasn't hers. you watched her sprint away from you like she couldn't get away fast enough. you sighed as you stood up, waiting for the elevator to stop on your floor. when it did, you were met with ona and mapi standing there, waiting for you.

"hi guys," you said softly. you moved past them to get to your room to change your shirt, thankful that neither of them wanted to talk to you about it. they waited for you to get ready before the three of you left together, everybody else having gone out a little earlier.

"have you thought about where you want to sign to?" mapi asked. ona's head snapped over to look at you, and for a moment, you thought about strangling mapi in the middle of the busy street.

"no, i haven't," you hissed. ona cleared her throat, causing you to glance over towards her. "oni, i would have told you, bu-,"

"sign to arsenal, they want you. i think that you could really help them, and it'll be fun to play against you in the champion's league," ona told you. you were shocked that she wasn't begging you to come back to barcelona. you remembered the night you packed up your bags and left for germany, and the way that ona had sobbed on her knees begging you to stay.

"are you sure? ale said that barcelona would resign me," you told her.

"it's not the right time for you to come back to barcelona, not yet. who knows, maybe you'll find a cute girl in london. they go a little crazy for a spanish accent. i hear leila's having a lot of fun in manchester," ona teased. your cheeks burned with heat as you thought about what she was suggesting. mapi nudged you as well, obviously on board with this idea. "think about it, okay?"

"yeah, i will," you promised. in all honesty, you had thought about transferring to the wsl or even the nwsl. there were a couple of teams in america that had really wanted you, but there was no way that you'd ever run into jenni in england. she was too far away to excuse a casual visit, so maybe arsenal was just what you needed for closure.

[thewritergremlin-rae]

Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall - Who's the Most Alien of Them All?

Pairing: Loki x Reader Characters: Loki, Thor, Brock Rumlow, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Frigga, Heimdall Rating: T Words: 3229 Content: 2nd person, kidnapping, chloroform, manipulation, soulmate AU, Hydra!SHIELD at work, set during/post Avengers 1 Summary: You'd never thought there was anything strange about your soulmate in the mirror, apart from how handsome he was, but as fate would have it - he's trying to invade New York. Ao3: HERE Notes: I am an absolute sucker for Soulmate AUs so here we are! I'm thinking of using this same AU for some others (Bucky and Steve) but I'm not sure if it'll be in same universe

In this AU, you see your soulmates face as your own reflection~ THIS IS A REPOST OF MY OWN WORK I accidentally deleted the original post so the read more doesn't work on my own blog 😭

Banners by cafekitsune

Something considered normal would rarely be considered wrong. 

So, registering your soulmate’s image via looking in a mirror at 18 and having a photo snapped had never worried you.

Everyone did it.

It was normal.

It was safe. 

It was how most people found their soulmates, and even then some just didn’t.

This early spring day started as every day usually did. You got up and ready for work, took public transport to the office, and logged in at 9 a.m. 

Lunch came and went, spent with the coworkers you got along with best, all venting about the small annoyances of the morning. You all returned to the office and the afternoon crawled by.

Last minute, your boss asked you to finish a report now rather than tomorrow morning and you waved goodbye to your co-workers with a shrug and a put-upon smile. They’d all been in your position at one time or another. No-one found it strange.

The report dragged on for a few hours and you had no idea why it couldn’t wait until tomorrow, but your boss was hardly known for his patience. He at least had the decency to stay behind too. 

You sighed and printed a quick copy before knocking on the door to your boss’s office. 

He called out and told you to come in, taking the report when you handed it over. His eyes barely scanned it before he spoke again; “Hey, I know it’s late, but we have a visitor in the conference room. Go keep them company, will you? It will just take a couple of minutes.” 

You bit back the sigh and the roll of your eyes, knowing both could lose you your job. Stupid, tight ass boss. “No problem, boss,” were the words that came out of your mouth, a false smile before you turned and left - heading to the conference room.

You took the liberty of rolling your eyes hard before you plastered the smile back on and pushed the door open. “Hello.” You stepped into the room and held out your hand as you gave your name. “Mr. Dickson is sorry to keep you waiting, but how can I help you?” 

Not the normal sort of client, if a client he was. Most clients showed up in suits or some sort of business attire, but this man wore a black T-shirt, combats, and a jacket certainly not of the suit kind. 

“Brock Rumlow.” He smirked over at you and you saw the way his eyes gave you a once over. Slowly. Urgh. Double ugh when he continued with; “No problem at all, sweetheart. Don’t suppose you could get me a coffee?”  He nodded over to the machine as he eased back into his seat. 

“Of course, sir,” you answered with a smile.

“Feel free to grab yourself one, too. Your boss sent you in here to keep me company, huh?” 

“Something like that, Mr. Rumlow.” The pot only needed warming before you poured two cups and offered him one, taking a seat opposite the man.

“I hope he doesn’t make you stay this late all the time, I hate it when my boss makes me work overtime.” He snorted and rolled his eyes as he took a sip of his coffee. “Do this, do that, clean up some mess, collect an alien’s soulmate, kill that politician, clean up more mess. Not a day’s rest I tell ya.” 

You nodded politely, staring down at your cup as you fully processed his words. Aliens, soulmates… killing politicians? You didn’t know which was the most out there. “I-’m sorry I’m not sure I follow…” 

He only looked more delighted at your confusion and the way your body had stiffened. “Well, you see, sweetheart, there’s this guy, Loki, who showed up outta nowhere and, see, he talks a big game about taking over the Earth and we figured, seeing as you’re his soulmate, that he might rethink those big ideas if we offer you up instead.” Brock shrugged as if this was just casual conversation and didn’t have you frozen in your seat. “’Course, if that doesn’t work, maybe threatening to harm ya will change his tune. But what do I know about aliens? I’m just part of the STRIKE team.” 

Brock smiled, as though he hadn’t just threatened you or spouted what sounded like absolute bullshit. A beat passed as you stared into the cup in your hands, eyes unseeing. “So why don’t we-” 

He growled angrily as you threw the coffee and the cup containing it at him and jolted to your feet, running for the door, pulling it open-

Your short-lived escape attempt ended when another similarly dressed and built man stepped into view. His hands clamped down on your arms and the panic really set in as you protested and tried to escape. “Let me go!” You kicked and thrashed, hoping the noise might cause your boss to call the cops, but that small slice of hope was soon ripped from you. He appeared from his office, face like thunder. 

“You said this would be quick, hurry up before someone hears this racket.” 

Brock huffed from behind you, fingers sliding into your hair and tugging hard to drag your head back. “We coulda done this the nice way, bitch, but that’s off the table.” He pressed a cloth to your mouth, harder than necessary.

The thought of not breathing hadn’t even crossed your mind before the fumes entered your body and you soon slumped into unconsciousness.

You woke already knowing you weren’t at home. Everything felt off and you hadn’t even opened your eyes yet as you laid on what felt like a bed. You took a shallow breath, trying to remember, but everything before falling asleep stayed fuzzy at the edges. 

You had been to work and… right, your boss had made you stay late and there had been coffee and…

Your eyes snapped open but so far it seemed like you were alone. The edge of the bed wasn’t far from the wall and you hesitated before rolling over. Good. No-one there either and this side of the wall had windows.

You shuffled over to them, eyebrows furrowing at their size. Small and curved at the edges. you slid the blind up to be met with the sight of clouds and uninterrupted sky. 

You scrambled to the edge of the bed and the one door that led in and out of the room. “Hey! Hey!” you yelled, banging on the door, fear skittering through you. How long ago had last night been? What time was it now? Where were you now?

“Quit ya banging!” A stern thump that made the door rattle had you stumbling back and falling down to sit on the edge of the bed. “We’re nearly there, no need to get your panties in a twist, bitch.” It sounded like the man you’d met in the office… Brock if you remembered correctly.

He’d certainly changed his tune, but you had thrown coffee at him. Bastard deserved it. 

“Where are we going?!” You had no idea if he would answer, if anyone would. Did it even really matter?

You were to be offered up as some consolation prize to an alien invader in the hopes he might go away. 

You weren’t convinced of the plan; who would change their plans for the mere idea and appearance of their soulmate. You probably wouldn’t if you were in Loki’s position. 

“New York,” came the answer before you heard footsteps leave the door. 

You sank to the bed and flopped back on it, unsure what to do with yourself or for the rest of the flight.

You sat in what had to be some kind of interrogation room, a bit rich considering these guys had kidnapped you. A window made up much of the wall in front of you; the blank expanse of glass left you with nothing to look at but the reflection of your soulmate. It hadn’t changed for several years, but you’d noticed recently his hair had grown longer and it didn’t seem as well kept as before.

The sharp lines of his face had always left you flustered, but now they left you worried at the gaunt paleness that clung to him. What had happened? You couldn’t possibly know, you didn’t even know his name. Well, you hadn’t.

Loki. An alien. An invader. 

You continued to sit silently in the chair, not knowing that an agent and your soulmate’s brother were busy deciding your fate.

“Father will not be pleased. Midgardians are not welcome to our realm and Loki is likely to remain in prison the remainder of her short life.” Thor spoke calmly but firmly. “Besides which, you tell me she is dangerous? A criminal? Why should Asgard take a criminal of Midgard to the golden realm? I do not think our prison is the best place to introduce them.” Thor couldn’t be certain, but he doubted the two would get along from what SHIELD had told him. 

His brother would likely perceive another criminal as a threat or he would keep his guard up. Loki was not one for letting people in so easily. Especially not now. Whether she deserved kindness or not, he doubted Loki would afford her any.

“What if your brother wants to bring her?” 

Thor’s eyes narrowed, giving the agent a sidelong glance. Hardly normal to accept a prisoner’s request… but he did love his brother fiercely - despite his recent tricks. “If,” Thor stressed, “Loki wants to bring her… I may agree,” Thor conceded. But he doubted such a thing would happen. “I will speak with him.” 

Neither you or Thor knew the thin thread by which your fate hung.

The car rumbled through central park, you seated in the back wearing handcuffs and some gag like thing over your mouth that stopped you speaking. You still wore the bright orange scrubs and white shirt as though they’d plucked you from a prison somewhere.

You were free of Rumlow at least, you didn’t even know if the agent driving knew that you hadn’t been picked up from a penitentiary. This new one aligned more with what you imagined an ‘agent’ to be. Black suit, white shirt, sunglasses. Very Men In Black, which, ironic, since you were about to meet two aliens. 

The car came to a stop and you looked out at the people milling around. You only recognised two for sure - one of them being your soulmate. Tony Stark confused you, for a moment, before you recalled his shift into heroism the last few years. 

An equally tall, blond man held your soulmate's arm just above his elbow, so you had to assume this was the brother you’d heard murmurs about. 

Your car door opened and a hand grabbed similarly below your elbow to help you out. Curious eyes turned on you and all you could do was silently, desperately, plead for someone to step in. Someone to take the gag off. You just needed one of them to be curious. 

“Er… I don’t remember any plus ones going out to this little party.” Tony Stark gave the agent at your side a look over the top of his sunglasses, his gaze briefly sliding to you. 

“She’s Loki’s soulmate,” the agent replied, no judgement but not much other emotion in his voice. He turned and marched you towards the pair of aliens. 

“Now, hang on a minute.” A different voice objecting this time and you craned your head behind you to see a blond dressed in a check shirt and a brown jacket. You thought you might have seen his face somewhere before, but you weren’t exactly firing on all cylinders and you couldn’t place him. “She might be a criminal of some kind, but you’re going to send her to another planet?” 

“I’m sorry, Captain, but it seems she may be more dangerous than a Midgardian prison could handle,” Thor answered. “My brother told me he has made many a visit to her on Earth.” Fucking news to you! Your eyes flicked to Loki, brows furrowed, but he didn’t meet your gaze. “I do not think he could have taught her many of the tricks he uses, but SHIELD assures me that they have indeed met before.” 

Now you understood the reason for the gag. Can’t contradict made up bullshit if you can’t speak. You were about to turn a furious gaze on the agent that brought you out of the car when the soft clinking of a chain drew your attention.

Loki curled a chained arm around your waist, grip firm, and tugged your back flush against him. The action forestalled anything you had been about to do or say and you attempted to catch his eye. He ducked his head and you felt the cool press of his own gag to the top of your head. 

The gesture had you stilling in surprise and seemed to only cement the story that Thor had been spun.

You felt eyes on the two of you, studying intently, before Loki’s little stunt seemed to be accepted as proof and preparations began again. You assumed for travel to this Asgard, but how exactly? There weren’t any space ships nearby and you were fairly certain the car you’d arrived in wasn’t about to escape Earth’s atmosphere.

Something with Loki here?

Thor reappeared in your line of sight holding one of two handles of some canister. A blue cube glowed inside, but it didn’t make any more sense than it had a few minutes ago. He caught your eye, his look intense and serious. “Make sure you do not let go or you will be lost to space as Loki was before he came here.” 

You felt like meaning lay beneath the words, something you were supposed to glean from them, but still struggling to process what had happened the last few days you simply nodded and took hold of the other handle. Loki’s hand settled beside yours, overlapping slightly. Unsure if this stemmed from kindness, or an attempt to be sure you didn’t let go. or something else to drag you further into the fiction and lies that had been created around you... Well, you had no way to protest, anyway.

You hoped nobody would spend too long looking for you. Maybe the local police had already told everyone you were dead, covering up the act that you still couldn’t quite understand. 

You wondered if you would ever see Earth again after this.

Your hand unknowingly reached for Loki’s at your waist, gripping tightly in fear of what was to come and in sorrow that you didn’t know what mess you were leaving behind. 

Silence as Thor turned the handle, anticlimactic, but you felt it as your stomach dropped similarly to when an elevator descends too quickly and you were pulled upwards. The blur of colours was almost too much for your eyes to bear as your vision blurred, but soon enough your feet settled on solid ground once more. 

You desperately blinked back the blurring at the edges of your vision to take in the bright gold that lined the room you had landed in. Or maybe an observatory of some kind.

“Welcome home,” a deep but firm voice greeted, your eyes drawn to a man in gold armour whose eyes glowed just as brightly as the metal. He sheathed the sword into the metal stand in front of him and approached the three of you.

You thought you could see something sad in his gaze as he touched the metal on your face, drawing it easily away from you and returning your ability to speak. “I am sorry you were dragged into this mess, miss.” 

“How did you…?” 

“My name is Heimdall and my duty is to watch over the Nine Realms. While I cannot see all at once, and some have managed to evade my sight in the past,” At this he gave Loki a look before returning his gaze to you - eyes softening once more, “I have kept an eye on your journey these past few days.” 

“Heimdall, of what do you speak?” Thor asked in utter confusion. 

But you found the words and breath to speak first. “They lied to you, I’m not an inmate! I’ve never even gotten a parking ticket!” you protested, courage mounting with every word you got out. “I was just doing my job like always and a couple of thugs came to the office and kidnapped me.” A squeeze at your waist reminded you of Loki’s presence and you pulled out of his grip, turning your annoyance on him. “And we have never met! I’ve only ever seen his reflection.” 

“Loki-” Thor growled at his brother, but received only a simple shrug and a look that lacked all remorse in reply. “Why did you-?”

Warm hands took your wrists and distracted you, your gaze drawn by watching Heimdall break the cuffs on your wrists as easily as if they were made of paper. “My apologies, miss. I had no way of letting anyone on Earth know of the misconception.” He didn’t smile, per se, but he seemed genuine and his greeting kind. 

He took a step back and you breathed with relief to finally be free of all your chains. “At least someone knows what’s going on.” Though Loki had to have known too, so why had he lied to Thor and SHIELD? “How exactly am I supposed to get home?” you asked, looking between the two brothers as if scolding children. 

“Heimdall is to use the Tesseract to restore the Bifrost and once it’s fixed, he will be able to send you home. If I can, I will return with you and explain the situation to the Avengers - they’ll be sure to help,” Thor rushed to assure you.

To be fair, they had tried, but Thor had been so convinced by SHIELD… Well, he just seemed to have gotten all mixed up in all of this so you nodded. “So, I’ll just have to wait until the bridge is fixed?” 

Thor smiled brightly this time, like the sun bursting through on a cloudy day. “Yes, just until it is fixed. I’m sure Mother will be happy to provide hospitality.” 

“I see my son is already volunteering me.” Her voice sounded light and happy despite the situation, drifting over from some as yet unseen doorway off to the side. 

“Your Majesty.” Heimdall bowed to her and you quickly followed suit - you didn’t want to end up in the dungeons for however long it would take to fix the Bifrost. 

You straightened up to find her gentle smile turned your way, her beauty and motherly face stealing your breath. “I’m glad to finally meet you, though you are such a familiar sight that I feel as though I know you already.” Her arm settled softly around your shoulders and she started to steer you along the beautiful bridge you stood on. 

Loki huffed behind you and you wondered if he might be embarrassed? No, probably not.

“I’m sorry you were brought here under such circumstances, but welcome to Asgard.” Weird space travel and spy stories coming to life aside, maybe spending some time in the golden city laid out before you wouldn’t be so bad. 

Want to be tagged in future parts or future Loki fic? Go here

[cinnoasch]

Is it ok if I request an Akira scenario where he's helping Y/N achieve her 'true persona'? How would he react when she achieves her persona? Or, different case scenario, how would Y/N react to Akira's "new form" when he gains HIS persona. dunno if this would work out, I've kinda forgot parts of the plot of Persona so I don't rlly remember where or when exactly this happened-

A/N: Hi anon! I'm so so sorry this took so long! I hope you enjoy!

Word Count: 2427

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Wish (Akira Kurusu x Fem!Reader)

You let out a sigh as you stare at your phone, occasionally typing some words and then deleting them a few seconds later. Tomorrow, the Phantom Thieves were going to steal Maruki’s treasure and fix reality once and for all. You were a bit nervous, but you had faith that things would turn out the way you hoped. The only thing that was bothering you however… was Akira. Besides the short conversations you had with the team during palace exploration, you hadn’t talked to him outside of that. You really wanted to, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to text or call him.

It was silly honestly. He was your boyfriend, yet here you were unable to talk to him. When you two first started dating, Akira told you that he would always be there for you, no matter what. Whether you needed to vent, talk or just wanted his company, he’d be there. Yet what about you? You hadn’t been there for him when he started the infiltration on Maruki’s palace. You had a hunch that things weren’t right from the start of the New Year, yet you couldn’t bring yourself out of that ‘perfect reality’. You wanted things to stay like that, even if he wasn’t by your side. Even if that was what you wanted the most.

Suddenly your phone rings, playing a ringtone you knew far too well. You glance at the screen seeing Akira's name and you answer hesitantly.

"Are you using our text messages as your grocery list again?" He asks.

“Wha- no, why would you ask that?”

“Well, you were taking a long time to type so I just figured you were typing your grocery list out.”

“I wasn’t typing out my grocery list for your information. Shopping’s the last thing on my mind right now.” You sigh. “Anyways, how’d you know I was typing? Were you waiting for me to text you?”

Akira chuckles, “I mean when your girlfriend suddenly cuts you off, a guy can’t help but wonder if he did something wrong.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Akira. It’s just… you know things have been hectic. We’ve been so busy lately with Maruki and everything else.”

“So busy that you can’t talk to me?”

You stay silent. He was right after all. Akira had made sure you all finished planning out a path to the treasure long before the deadline. You had plenty of time to talk to him, but you just felt guilty every time you thought about it.

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” He sighs. “It’s just… I miss you;, you know? We’ve barely talked since this whole thing started. And I’m not blaming you, it’s my fault too but if there’s something wrong, I want you to tell me.” 

“I know, and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you worry. I know it’s late, but I want to talk to you… can I come over?”

“No need, I’m already heading your way. Just wait for me, okay?”

“Okay.”

You hang up and put your phone down on the couch next to you. You were glad that he called but you also felt terrible. The last thing you wanted to do was make him worry, make him feel as if he did something wrong. You hated hearing him like that. Sure, you two had your fights sometimes but this was different. Not only did you betray his trust, but you broke your own promise to him.

Akira must have been closer than you expected because a few minutes later you hear a knock on the door. You go to open it, greeting him with a smile. “Hey.”

“Hey.” He replies a bit out of breath. “You weren’t waiting long, were you?”

“Please tell me you didn’t run here.”

“I didn’t. Definitely not.”

You roll your eyes as you pull him inside and close the door behind him. “Liar. Come on in, before you catch a cold.”

Akira chuckles, “I only did what you told me to. Besides, I was going to show up uninvited, but I’m glad I called you first.”

“So that’s why you said you were already headed over… Well, thank you for calling first.” You clear your throat. “Anyways, um, sit down. Would you like some tea or hot chocolate?”

He shakes his head, “No thanks.” Then he takes a seat on the couch, patting the empty space next to him. “Come here. You don’t have to be so nervous.”

“I’m not nervous…” you mumble as you sit down next to him. “Okay maybe a little, but it’s just because we haven’t talked like this in a while. Like… a serious conversation like this.”

“Would you believe me if I told you I was nervous too?”

“No. You’re always so calm and collected. If you are, I can’t tell.”

“Then here,” Akira says, taking your hand and placing it over his heart. Even through his winter coat, you could feel his heart beating at a quick, steady pace. You glance up, meeting his gaze as he smiles softly. “Now, do you believe me?”

You nod, unable to tear your eyes away from him. Just how lucky were you to have someone like him in your life? Someone that easily washed away the doubts in your mind with a single action. Someone that was so kind to you even after how you treated him. With a simple action and a smile that melted your heart, Akira washed your guilt away. It’s hard to believe that your ‘perfect reality’ didn’t have him by your side. 

“If you keep staring at me like that, we might not get any talking done at all.”

Drawn out of your thoughts, you quickly pull your hand away from Akira’s chest. “S-sorry, I was just thinking…” 

“It’s okay. Still nervous?”

You shake your head. “Nope, nerves are all gone. Thank you.” With a deep breath, you start. “Well, first of all, I wanted to apologize for how I’ve been these past few weeks. I didn’t mean to cut you off like that, and my intention wasn’t to make you think you did something wrong. It’s just… I felt guilty.”

“Guilty?”

“Mhm… the truth is, I knew from the beginning that this reality was off. I’m not sure how I knew, it was just a hunch really. But, instead of telling you, I pretended to not know. It’s just seeing everyone so happy… it wouldn’t feel right taking that away. Yet in the end, I guess we all made up our minds anyway…” You look down at your hands, fiddling with the hem of your shirt. “The main thing is that I should’ve been there when you first infiltrated Maruki’s palace. And yet I wasn’t. Despite you always being there for me, I couldn’t even be there for you…”

“So you knew…”

You nod, feeling Akira’s gaze. You knew that if you looked at him, you might just end up crying. He didn’t sound mad, if anything it was more surprise and slight disappointment. To be honest, you weren’t sure why you made that choice of not telling him. Maybe it was just how you were, you always had a habit of hiding things from people, even if you didn’t mean to.

To your surprise he ruffles your hair, and you look up, seeing him smile. “I’m not upset. So don’t look so sad. I’m a bit hurt that you didn’t tell me, but it sounds like you had your reasons, right?”

“...yeah. I didn’t want to see our friends have what they wanted the most taken away from them.”

“And what did you want? You probably weren’t affected by Maruki’s reality because you didn’t have it.”

“I…” You hesitate. Would it be selfish of you to say what you wanted? He was already right here next to you. Just like you wanted originally. However, voicing your thoughts aloud was different. If you told him, what would he think? 

“There’s that look again.” Akira says with a small chuckle as his gaze turns towards the ground. “It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me now. Or ever, if you don’t really want to. But just know that whatever it was, it wasn’t selfish of you to think that way… I mean, all of us, me included, we have our selfish ways, don’t we? That’s why this ‘perfect reality’ came about anyways.”

It wasn't often, but very rarely you saw this type of expression on Akira. It was distant, but there was also a feeling of longing. As if he was trying to come to terms with something. 

“...perfect reality…” You mumble quietly. Then your eyes widen in realization. 

Tonight was the last day for Maruki to contact Akira. You felt stupid for forgetting something so important. Then you look at Akira. Did he have that same look throughout all of this? That look of loneliness? That look easily told you who else was on his mind.

"Maruki contacted you… right? To be honest it slipped my mind… even though it was something so important."

Akira nods. "Yeah, he contacted me."

"And Akechi was there too?"

He looks at you surprised. "How did you-"

"The look on your face. The last time I saw you with that expression was when he died. You two were really close, huh?"

“...yeah.” Akira sighs. “Somehow, Maruki heard of what happened to him and in order to give us another chance at being friends, this reality came to life.” Akira runs his hands through his hair. “If we don’t go through with taking back our reality… Akechi will be alive, and if we don’t… well the answer is obvious.”

You stay silent, not sure of what to say. What could you say to this? 

“It’s a lot to take in, right? You’d think it’d be a simple decision after everything. But when someone’s life is being used like that…like a bargaining chip… it just feels wrong.” Akira shakes his head slightly and glances at you. “What would you do if you were me?”

There was that expression again. How were you supposed to answer him when such a sorrowful expression painted his face?

“I…” You begin hesitantly, trying to find the words to say. “I’d go through with what we started. Of course, using someone’s life like that is just wrong, but I think it’d be best if we went through with it. I think Akechi wouldn’t be able to stand knowing that we turned our backs on what we originally planned to do. If we did that… it’d just seem like his sacrifice in Shido’s palace was for nothing… at least that’s how I feel.”

Akira chuckles, “Sounds about right.” He sits up, leaning his head back to stare at the ceiling. “I thought the exact same thing.”

“You already gave Maruki your answer then… So why ask for my opinion?”

He hums in thought, a smile appearing on his face. “Because your opinion is important to me. Why do you think I was in such a rush to get here, to talk to you? During this whole thing, I’ve heard everyone’s opinions on what they thought we should do about this reality. Yet the one person whose opinion I wanted to hear the most, the person whose opinion is the most important to me, never contacted me to talk.” Akira turns to you, a soft expression on his face. “You know I’ll always be here for you right? No matter what. So don’t keep your feelings or thoughts locked inside.”

You blink a couple of times, feeling tears start to prick at your eyes again. You chuckle slightly as you look away from him. “You sure do have a way with words. Makes sense that you’re our leader…” With a sigh you face him with a smile. “I’ve made up my mind. No more keeping to myself. It wouldn't be fair to you, making you worry. I want to be someone you can rely on too.”

You couldn’t explain it but somehow, you felt different after you told Akira that. As if your soul felt stronger somehow, as if a voice in your head told you that you had changed. You weren’t exactly sure what this feeling was, but you knew that you wanted to give back to Akira after all he’s done for you.

You hear him chuckle, about to say something but you place a finger on his lips. “Nope, I know what you’re gonna say. That you already rely on me for a lot, but let me have this okay? I want to trust in this feeling that I have, that I can be stronger for you and the team. If I can’t truly confide in you, then who am I to even wish for you?”

“You… So that was your wish?”

“I-” Your face reddens in embarrassment as you take your hand away from his face and avert your gaze. You didn’t even realize what you had said.

“Oh, what happened to ‘no more keeping to myself’?” Akira teases. “C’mon, be honest now.”

Your face reddens even more as you look down at your hands, mumbling slightly. “I wished for you.”

“One more time? I couldn’t quite hear you.”

“I wished for you! There, happy?” You shout as you look at Akira. He had the widest smirk on his face. You grab the pillow next to you and smother him with it. “Wipe that grin off your face…”

“What? A guy can’t be happy that his girlfriend wished for him? You don’t have to be so embarrassed. Y’know it’s cute that you’d wish for something you already have.”

“Just please… shut up.”

He laughs and suddenly you feel his hands on yours as he lowers the pillow so he can look at you. “But seriously, I’m really happy you told me, even though you said it without realizing. You said it with such conviction, I wasn’t sure if I heard you correctly. You feel… stronger.”

“Yeah, yeah. You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”

“Mm, I think I can prove otherwise.”

You laugh as you look up, meeting his eyes again. “Yeah? And how can you-”

In one swift motion, Akira closes the gap between the two of you, his lips pressing onto yours. It was quick and sweet; you didn’t even have the time to react with how fast it happened.

As he leans his forehead against yours, you can hear him whisper, a bit of playfulness laced in his voice. “Believe me now?”

[cowboyjen68]

Hi Jen, sorry for dumping a big rant in your askbox but your blog has helped me figure out my identity and I don’t have anyone to talk to about this in real life lol. Feel free to delete if this is too weird.

So I’m a 17 y/o butch, and I have been masculine since I was a little kid. I always felt lucky to have a family that was generally okay with my gender nonconformity. They treated it like a cute quirk of mine, and I never felt like I was being judged or that I should change the way I am around them. My dad got a kick out of it. One summer he let me help him build the deck in our backyard. He always took me to baseball games, he dressed me up in his old clothes, basically treated me like I was his son and I loved it.

I feel like as I get older, my masculinity becomes less acceptable. I went to visit my paternal grandmother for the holidays, hadn’t seen her in a few years, and the first thing she said to me was “I thought you would’ve grown out of all that by now” (in reference to my haircut and outfit, I think.) I just don’t know how to react to the way my extended family treats me now. They used to be totally fine with it, but I spent my entire Christmas feeling like I was being judged for every little thing.

Like, what’s changed? Why is it cute and funny when a little girl wears boy’s clothes and wrestles with her cousins, but disgusting when I grow up and settle into my masculinity?

It’s like I’ve crossed the invisible line between being a tomboy and being a dyke, and now no one wants to entertain it anymore.

Again, sorry for the rant haha, I just feel like I’m going crazy because I tried to talk to my sister about it and she said she didn’t notice them acting any different, but I swear my aunt spent half of our Christmas dinner telling me how pretty I would be if I just wore a bit of makeup lmaoo. I’m just wondering if anyone else has experienced this, because I’m feeling pretty lost right now. Thanks, and happy holidays!

It is not weird at all. I hear that young lesbians, particularly butches, do not have older role models to bounce ideas off of or vent or get any perspective on certain experiences. Moms and Dads and straight sisters and cousins, no matter how well meaning, will just not always "get" what is happening. They say things like "we love you no matter what" and "we don't care if you are a lesbian" and they mean it, mostly. But they often don't see the subtle clues (or blatant ones)they toss around that indicates how uncomfortable they are with you being so visible, but just existing as you naturally are.

AND OH MY GOSH yes I have experienced exactly what you are talking about with the deepening judgement as you move from a cute little Tomboy to an adult butch women. It is almost like they hope to "catch it early" when we are in our teens and redirect us away from the "danger" of being a visible lesbian. And a woman who does not, in very overt ways, conform to their idea of how a woman should be and act.

My dad was relatively consistent in treating me pretty much like he would a son and, to his credit, he did so with my straight sister. We were allowed to do just about anything my older brothers did. In part because my sister was pretty strong willed but also a lot like him. I was less strong willed but she had mowed the path.

Mom was the one who was forever concerned about my looks and behavior, both out of worry I would not fit in, and because she had a certain expectation of how her daughter should grow up. Both normal Mom reactions. She understood bullies and knew that sticking out could be difficult. Her solution was not to strengthen my resilience but to attempt to "tone me down". Her efforts increased as I made the jump from kid to teen and into my late teens. She would discourage me from cutting my hair, becoming almost angry when I brought it up. She would tell me how lovely I was in dresses and skirts and say thing like " a little make up would be nice". It got really old. It lead to us not always getting along even though I loved and respected my mom. She was a great mom. But this one thing made us both crazy. She could not cool it and I could not change who I was.

Friends at school saw hints of my liking girls. I stopped wearing cowboy boots and my favorite horse buckle and it their place went with K Mart Tennis shoes and a generic belt that came with my pants, again, from Kmart. I put away the cowboy fringed shirts and flannel and went with simple jeans and sweatshirts, the acceptable attire for boys and girls in my rural high school. I kept my hair long to disguise my "looking like a boy" traits.

I (barf) agreed to date a boy and spent the better part of that time making excuses to not kiss him or spent time with him. I was starting to listen to mom and do my best to hide ME from the world. Anything (with in reason) to throw the world off the scent, the scent of me being a lesbian. Being butch made that one more step difficult.

It is hard to hide the space we take up naturally.

It might seem hard to see it now by your family is slightly well intentioned, knowing that being "seen" easily as a lesbian can be dangerous. But also, they are uncomfortable with your energy and physical presence because it does not coincide with their ideas of what a woman acts, feels and moves like. This is a THEM problem and I can give you words of comfort based on experience.

The more you begin to be you, and dress in what gives you comfort the more your confidence will grow and be evident. People who are emboldened to try and change you for their own comfort tend to back way off when there is no opening for their opinions. They just sort of realize they are wasting time. AND for those that don't, there are always a few, you don't have to give them any air or acknowledgement. You get to let them waste time and energy while you look great in whatever you wish to wear and however you wish to cut your hair. And in a wonderful turn around, you don't have to spend any effort just being you or trying to defend or correct them.

You are fast approaching adulthood and with that will come even more freedom and independence. Don't rush it but also, work towards that.

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

Hi? Gosh how do I even start with this :'D

I know it's been ages since I've last popped up on here. I've been debating when to post this for a while, but I kept adding to my draft more and more and now it's the end of JULY omgg I felt so guilty disappearing with zero updates but then thought my birthday would be the best day to finally address this considering it'll feel less random? idk but Ive always celebrated my bday with you guys and I'd feel so bad answering your kind asks without me at least explaining why I was gone for months.

Truth be told, I was dealing with a lot of stuff irl. health issues and sudden declining grades that left me stumped and drained for months now- along with technical issues like having to replace some parts of my computer that took a while for me to find to even draw digitally, which I didn't have the time for anyway with how tired and weary I felt every day.

I'm frankly shaken up by a lot of shit rn and I don't know how to be active online with this burden on my chest- Especially as it's been a while since I've even looked at utmv related content and my motivation dwindled. I swear I'd hype myself up to post or reblog something- but I'd see just how much I've missed or the overwhelming amount of posts I'd need to go through and I'd feel so swamped with exhaustion and most importantly guilt, for not clearing the air up sooner to reassure you guys that I'm, y'know, alive, and not dead in a ditch somewhere. And I'd procrastinate cause typing it all out is hard and I'd give up halfway every time and it's just not fair to you all!

I thought I was handling it well when I started going out and socializing more, instead of staying cooped up at home on my computer all day. and in the first draft of this post I made months ago I was gonna detail some of the fun plans I had, for my life and for this blog :D but relaxing my strict study schedule and letting go a bit of my tight routine, thinking it was better than wringing myself dry to keep it up, backfired horribly, to say the least.

I know right?? so silly to be hung up on stupid shit like studies of all things! but this is a very important thing for me considering my career plans and the competitivity encouraged by everyone I'm surrounded by, the pressure of keeping up adding to my already stressful days. I had to fix myself up first and I couldn't handle the strain nor interact with people and thinking of jobs and exams sapped my energy so much it's frankly embarrassing. writing this feels so cheesy too and it frustrates me to know I could've come back a month earlier if it weren't for that, but I also know putting all of this into words then would just sound like incoherent venting (not that this is very different tbf) and I wasn't in the right headspace to address my absence, or anything really- I didn't want everyone to see me return when I couldn't muster up a genuinely positive message, let alone talk to anyone with a shadow of my usual cheer

I feel like a complete mess and It drives me up the wall how depressed I've gotten. I debated deleting this blog so many times 'cause the fear of disappointing my audience and my friends, for lack of a more fitting sentiment, made me feel even shittier. I'm constantly thinking if this wall of text is worth posting, or if it's better not to burden you all with all my sappy troubles as if it's the end of the world. Trust me, I'll be fine. I'm not trying to dramatize this situation, but I don't think I'm up to pretending I'm all sunshine and enthusiasm you're all accustomed to.

So sorry for worrying you all! I'll try to catch up, deliver some missed birthday gifts, and answer some asks while I'm at it! Again, I can't state how much I appreciate your support throughout the years. It's frankly a miracle I kept any of you around with how much I keep popping and leaving at random with no warning. I definitely can't promise for my stay to be without a hitch, and if you don't mind an inconsistent schedule you're free to stay of course, but I'm afraid I can't sustain the pace I had when I first started this blog. I'll keep posting art, but lower my activity in the fandom sphere to reduce the strain on my mental health. so fewer rants and walls of text, more art, and less stress overall. Love you all and thanks for waiting for this long <3

[lunarubra]

Little update...

First, I want to apologize in advance—this is going to be a bit long, and I’ll be venting about a lot of things. Sorry for that.

So, I realize almost no one noticed this, and that’s partly because I’ve been quiet about it, trying to process everything before doing anything.

I took a few days off from Tumblr to figure out if I was just overreacting or being overly sensitive. I even debated whether I should take down all my stories, delete my blog, or just keep one. To be honest, bullying isn’t new to me; I’ve dealt with it most of my life.

Over the past few days, though, a blog—or possibly a group of blogs—started bullying me and attacking what I’ve published, to the point where they reported my Chapter 7 to Tumblr, which led to it being taken down. That chapter contained smut, and apparently, I didn’t follow the guidelines by not marking it as mature content.

But what really hurts is that these people "discovered" through my stories that I’m Muslim and Arab. Since then, I’ve been bombarded with racist, disgusting messages. Even after blocking them, I kept receiving more, to the point where I had to disable anonymous asks.

I’ve reached out to Tumblr and appealed the removal of Chapter 7. Hopefully, it’ll be restored, but I’ll have to mark it as mature content. Which, let’s be honest, feels a bit ridiculous considering no one else seems to be doing that and they’re getting by just fine—but then again, they’re not being harassed by a group of Zionists.

So, what’s the point of all this? Well, here it is: Are you done? You don’t like that I’m Muslim—what a shocker. You think I’m a terrorist, that the only "good Muslim" is a dead one? Fine. But just ignore me. When I started this blog, I made a rule for myself: stay away from politics. I wanted a space that was mine, where the only thing that mattered was obsessing over our fandom. I needed that. A place where, at least here, I didn’t have to worry about what it’s like to be a Muslim in the Western world.

And yes, I know this situation isn’t the biggest deal in the grand scheme of things. A bunch of insults about why I shouldn’t exist and getting reported for one chapter isn’t earth-shattering. But it’s just another place where I can’t pretend to feel safe. Even here, in my own little corner, playing with my "characters", if my characters aren’t white and Christian, it’s somehow a problem.

I understand what real problems are. My aunt is Palestinian, from Haifa. Do you know what that means for my family? It means every day, we hear news about people we know—or people my mom, my uncle, or my aunt knew—being killed or trying to flee for their lives. I get these updates daily. So forgive me if I wanted at least this space to be free from Zionist insults. Just leave me alone, for fuck's sake.

From now on, anyone who thinks Muslims should die, who labels me a terrorist, or who tries to explain how Israel is just "defending itself" will be blocked.

Sorry for the long post, but I needed to get this off my chest.