#sorry not sorry but i AM and im tired of pretending i am not a funny ass bitch!!!!
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hoptal
#library of ruina#yesod lor#yesod#netzach lor#netzach#PRETEND ITS THE 14TH FOR ME OKAY!! god this thing made me feel so tired but its over. its over. am i happy w it? no.#ahhhghg the dialog is subpar. you can see visibly where i started and stopped some days. yk what. its. done.#ill do a whole different reblog from the sideblog on just ramblings of getting through it plus choices made. tldr aroace and harder to writ#romance that feels genuine. either way its done!! i was going to have it not as detailed but since i already missed the date by a lot might#as well put more effort into it yk. the last one made me want to die though. its really iffy compaired to the others . struggled so hard to#make it look right. ended up just going w one of the other previous sketches and just giving up and shading it in. i dobnot gaf it can look#weird but be done. HUZZAH!!!#ohbright forgot#netsod#probablt will do the text reblog abouuutt ???? 2 hours after og goes up. just to properly format it and collect thoughts and write#to who ever sent that anonymous ask. hope u like it. sorry it took so long#if this isnt in order i will melt into the floor and be consumed into the earth. PLEASEPELASPELASPLEASE#i onow i will make a seperate post abt it. but also. still just very. eh? i wanted to try and be true to what i had originally come to enjoy#with lor. but also i know im not capable of replicating such aspects and works and craftsmanship. but i still want to keep to what i can or#try to express facets that drew me into it all. which makes me a bit skittish abt writing dialog or drawing them in any other situation that#isnt just like. white void or the like. but still... .. .. . ahgh. skittish and overthinking. i cant tell what is attempting to handle with#adoration and care and what is just being overly terrified of having words or intent misconstrued#rechecking and rechecking and rechecking and .. . .. ect ect. i cannot look at it lest i explode
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O'Knutzy Week Day 5
Yooo, we've made it to the end!! (Of creating at least, still two more days left but I didn't have time to make anything. Also still written in advance to the actual week.)
Anyway, I figured for the last day I would share the songs on my O'Knutzy playlist I listened to while writing my stories (+ the characters they remind me of and why they did)
Credit of this beautiful thing we call Logan Tremblay, Finn O'Hara, and Leo Knut to @lumosinlove , and thanks to @oknutzy-week-2024 for also just being amazing.
Anyway songs under cut :)
shhh its a shit ton of Hozier
Line Without a Hook, Rick Montgomery - Ok look at me and tell me this isn't Harvard Era Finnlo. "You can hold my hand if no ones there" LOGAN! "All my emotions feel like explosions when you're around" FINN! Nuff' said.
Wish You Were Sober, Conan Gray - I only need one word to explain this one. Harvard. Next!
Sun, Two Door Cinema Club - Mainly reminds me of Finn, especially when he's in Gryfindor and Logan's still at Harvard. But also like listen to it, literally the entire song is just them.
Young In America, Barnes Courtney - Just gives me that Harvard vibe yk, Finn and Logan being best friends and then being drawn apart, it just fits them Imo. ALSO THAT LAST FUCKING VERSE IS SO UGH FINNLO (Also happens to be my favorite song rn so that may be part of it but like it's still them)
Running In Circles, Dead Poet Society - LOGAN. Specifically Logan his last year of college without Finn and him being in pain. Him having to hide it as well, and pretending he's not completely fucking devastated without Finn. Just the angst.
Atlantis, Seafret - Makes me think of Logan being scared and constantly telling Finn they can't and pretty much everything after the night Finn leaves Harvard. The feeling of helpless and inevitable heartbreak is very in line with that period of time.
Mind Over Matter, Young The Giant - Very Logan coded. Kinda how I imagined him with Leo and Finn before they got together. Also, "Cause' I'm a young man built to fall" is just something I think Logan would have told himself on why he couldn't tell Finn or Leo.
To Someone From A Warm Climate, Hozier - Also very Logan coded, I imagine him just quietly singing this into Leo's ear in the dark of a winter night, which are cold in Gryfindor which Leo is NOT used to.
Francesca, Hozier - Ahem, "the entire fucking song". Finn. This song = Finn. More exactly reflecting back on all of the hurt he and Logan went through together and knowing he would do it again. And again. And again. Especially when he's a Lion and O'Knutzy isn't a thing yet.
Home, Good Neighbours - Leo's homesickness, Logan missing Gryfindor in NY, Finn wanting to go back to Logan at Harvard. All of it. Though it did mainly make me think of Leo going home for a little bit after the Rangers knocked the Lions out of the playoffs in Vaincre.
TIMEZONE, Maneskin - Let me take you back to a lovely place called Logan fully ditching all-stars to see Leo and Finn in Vaincre. If this isn't the most Logan song I've ever heard, I don't even know. Also could be Logan in NY, or even Finn in Gryf while Logan's at Harvard.
Heaven Must Have Sent You, The Elgins - Leo. Just the way Leo tends to think about Finn and Logan, and he's definitely played this while dinner was cooking and the three of them danced in the kitchen.
Can't Take My Eye's Off You, Frankie Valli - Leo sings this at karaoke night constantly and you cannot tell me otherwise. Anyway, self explanatory, moving on.
Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene, Hozier - Finn and the way he thinks of Leo and Logan. I think that's enough.
From Eden, Hozier - Yk, I don't actually have a clear explination for this one, it just gives me those O'Knutzy vibes.
Somewhere Only We Know, Keane - Reminds me of Harvard and the Roof, but also just a very O'Knutzy and FinLo song that makes me want to reread Coast to Coast.
Ditmas, Mumford and Sons - FinLo falling apart after Finn graduates. The angst is very appropriate and obviously it doesn't last but this is how I imagine it was back then.
i wanna be your girlfriend, girl in red - Very self explanatory, we don't need to dwell on it.
Figure You Out, VOILA - Hey remember when Logan freaked out when he though Finn got a girlfriend? This, it's this. Every time one little romantic interest and Logan just turns into the embodiment of this song.
Mercy, Shawn Mendes - Ok yes Ik it's basic but this is totally how Finn felt when him and Logan were doing their little dance around each other and it was absolutely Killing Finn.
Thinking Out Loud, Ed Sheeran - OK I GET IT ALSO BASIC but it does genuinely make me think of an older O'Knutzy, one that will love each other for a very long time and will love each other no matter what happens and how they change.
High, Stephen Sanchez - Sorry this song is so Finn being fucking horny over Logan in college and thinking about all the things he would do to him given the chance.
Beautiful Things, Benson Boone - SHUT UP I KNOW BASIC, but anyway this is Logan thinking over the last few years and how things have gotten so much better but also being so so so scared he could lose it all in a moment. His beautiful things are Finn and Leo.
Supernatural, Barnes Courtney - Finn constantly at Harvard. Logan and him are dancing around each other and Logan keeps fucking touching him and being so close and it drives him insane. And just a very Harvard Era song.
Like Real People Do, Hozier - Not Finn saying "can we for once not kiss while we're both crying" and that's literally just this song in different words, ok?
If She's Anything Like Me, MALINDA - Logan with every single girl Finn talks about or even looks at. Finn is genuinely the most perfect and lovable person in his eyes, so why wouldn't everyone else love him, too? And just because he doesn't have the guts to say it, that doesn't mean they won't.
Heat Waves, Glass Animals - Ok ok ok ok ok hear me out..... Actually I don't have much to defend this so Ig it's just all of them staying up late at night just thinking about each other.
Home, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros - A very FinLo coded song, especially with the "Jade...Alexander....I was falling deep deep deeply in love with you," part because tell me that didn't happen. Also Leo works in here too because home is with his boys and their home will always be with him, too.
When He Sees Me, Kimiko Glenn & co - Definitely what Leo came into his Rookie season thinking. Especially once he met Finn and Logan knowing he'd be head over heels if he wasn't careful. Just very Leo as well because ofc he's fucking defensive of his heart right after Jack bitchass Archer.
She, Foxy Venus - Guess, take a wild guess. Did you guess Harvard Era Finlo because yeah, that's it. More specifically I think Finn and trying to get Logan out of his mind and move on and that not working whatsoever.
Can't Help Falling in Love, Elvis Presley - This took me an embarrassingly long time to add but yeah Very much Leo with his boys and then Logan and Finn with Leo.
Can't Pretend, Tom Odell - Also took me an embarrassingly long time to add considering it HAS THE SAME TITLE AS ONE OF MY FUCKING WORKS but we don't need to dwell on it. Anyway, FinLo again, especially canonically when they have their little talks about loving each other and not admitting it.
This playlist will probably grow but y'all ain't getting my Spotify so it's just a list rn, might add onto it, idk. Anyway, hope this was suitable for a final O'Knutzy week post and figured it be fun to show you what I was listening to while writing all this. Genuinely I had To Someone From A Warm Climate on repeat while writing the first half of With a Straight Face because if y'all we're confused about the vibe, it's that (especially the beginning). Also Supernatural was on repeat for the first part of When We Can't Pretend (Oh and High was on repeat during the Kiss in the second half, lol).
Ok peace I genuinely can't wait to see everything when I get back in August!
#finn o'hara#logan tremblay#leo knut#o'knutzy#sweater weather lumosinlove#breakaway lumosinlove#vaincre lumosinlove#coast to coast lumosinlove#I'm so tired I can't tag rn#If yall made it this far congrats sorry for my weird music tase#I would have had more barns courtney if more fit with o'knutzy but unfortunately it does not#I should have gone to sleep two hours ago but alas#here I am#I'll probably just put to someone from a warm climate on repeat until I fall asleep#I'm actually so mad that I remembered can't pretend by Tom Odell only after i'd finished my fic with the exact same title#like that could have been perfect#anyway this was actually made the day before the actual week so I'm not as early in scheduling this one#hope it was a good week#Ill be back in August to see the beautiful trainwreck#o'knutzy week 2024#was#oh shit#forgot to tag#lumosinlove#told you Im tired#I'm going to bed now
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Oghhhh Angel and Timothy's miserable awkward and just horrible dynamic (Thinking about it (I want Angel to rip into him I need her to be mad at him idc she deserves to bully him))
#I am tryying really hard to just scribble down thoughts and ideas and sketches#I need to honestly just start writing dialogue like fully.#I don't write often because I get self-conscious#But I need to share this#This is less silent hill and more exploring their dynamic but I want to get to the silent hill part sometime.#I really want Angel to go ape shitt (she is tired of being nice)#can i say something#im sick of the way timothy is babied by a certain sort of person u know the type#He needs to be bullied hes kind of a massive loser#Also i feel like people pretend that he hasn't done anything morally dubious at best ever uhm#did you pay attention in the pre sequel i dont care if he's sorry about that im so fucking mad about felicity#I love him I love him greatly he's one of my favorite guys but I don't always like the way he's treated by fanssss#thats a grown ass man with a dick and balls#Urrgh
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is there something specific we're tryna understand rn? or just like in general
you are so sweet. like sugar like melt in ur mouth candy. I'll probably sleep for a couple hours, I don't have trouble sleeping, I was just staying up so I'd be able to call my brother (time zones)
I can't understand anything! I've never understood a single thing. whenever I try to understand stuff it only makes sense for a little then it stops making sense. I live on these tiny little islands of understanding that I swim between and the ocean is so deep and changing!!!!!!!
thank u for asking!!!! I really don't get it!!
#ask#asks#im so tired of pretending I understand because thats what your supposed to do#im so sleepy from it!!#but i am okay! i appreciate your worry! i dint expect anyone to worry! this is very in character for me#the world is so hard to understand and i am one of the people who doesnt understand it#everyone has always told me that I'm a person who understands ever since i was little but im not!!#i truly don't get it! but im safe! no worries! sorry if i disturbed you!
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I just desperately want things to go back to normal, i am so genuinely tired of hearing about my grandmothers dementia and overall condition getting worse every. single. morning. and how my uncles practically catatonic from being on the wrong meds every. single. morning.
#thoughts#i dont care if it makes me a bad person to be tired of this at this point i am so fucking tired of it#i want to go back to quiet mornings where we dont have much to talk about#im so tired every day of hearing about how much worse my grandmas getting and how my uncle is still on the wrong meds#i know how much worse it is on my dad to see my grandma going through this but i cant keep pretending this doesnt have an effect on everyone#also this is my grandmother who treated my mom poorly AND treated me worse than my male cousins so#full offense i feel like im allowed to just…not really care or have any thoughts and feelings above feeling sorry for my dad#idk ill probably delete this because i feel awful for thinking all this but i dont have therapy till next week
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Not to brag but god im fucking hilarious
#ashes ramblings#sorry not sorry but i AM and im tired of pretending i am not a funny ass bitch!!!!#Sorry if u dont agree buuuuut ur wrong!!!! hehe!!!!
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Hi, I keep coming back, but I got another song for you!! Life After Salem by Lil Nas X is so Jay to Alex, but you can even squeeze some Tim in there too!!
NEW SONG WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Okay you know the drill, shitty lyric analysis under the thingy so its all neat and tidy before BAM me spewing a bunch of bullshit about my favorite lil guys. Also this one goes off the rails cos i just finished it with a massive fuck off migraine, so it starts out all detailed then becomes "yes song good good" pretty much lol
You're so right tho, this song is so Jay and Alex.
All of my feelings are gone I left 'em all on the floor Man, who's to blame if you don't love me no more? No, I don't mind, just take whatever you want
Shocker, Alex and Jay singing a duet.
To me the first two lines would be sung by Jay about him hiding his feelings for Alex back in college/uni, pretending he didn't like him or want to be in a relationship with him (beyond just their FWB relationship), pretending he wasn't in love with Alex for years despite knowing that he absolutely was. Probably those lines would be sung by Jay to Alex about their time in College, explaining what he tried to do with his feelings: "I left 'em all on the floor". Those lines would also probably be sung, like, after Alex has said all those nasty things to Jay in the kitchen? Somewhere around then. This is like a song for if they ever actually fucking talked to each other properly lmao.
The next line would be Alex's response, a sort of manipulative way of saying he understands why Jay doesn't trust him anymore, that he understands what he did and why it was cruel. But in that kinda "oh woe is me I'm just the worst" kinda way, yknow? Trying to make Jay go "no, you're not the worst, you're not evil, you just didn't think it's okay!" and give Alex another chance. There'd definitely be a certain level of sincerity as well though, because Alex really does realize that he was pretty damn shitty to Jay. He wants Jay not to love him anymore. He needs Jay not to love him anymore.
Then the last line is kinda both of them, but in different ways, like they'd sing it together but with completely different tones and it'd be so obvious that they're talking about different things. For Jay "No, I don't mind, just take whatever you want" is about how Alex just kinda took and took and took from him throughout their relationship, but it'd also be a kinda, like, good tone? Like Jay's convinced himself that he genuinely doesn't mind how much Alex has taken from him, he kind of likes the fact that he could give Alex that control over him etc? For Alex "No, I don't mind, just take whatever you want" would be a lot more bitter, he feels like Jay is the unreasonable one who just keep's taking, because he's taken Alex's heart (lmao cringe) and Alex was not ready to give it away to him.
Why don't you just take what you want from me? I think you should take what you want and leave Why don't you just take what you want from me? I think you should take what you want and leave
Alex. He wants Jay to have basically everything he's wanted out of their relationship just before he leaves and Alex makes sure that they don't see each other again. Jay gets to kiss Alex, they have sex in a bed, Jay sleeps over, they have breakfast together, etc.
(It is another day now and I have a headache. Thinking is hard, the rest of this is probably gonna be a mess im sorry lol.)
What you want from me? Yeah What you want from me? Yeah
Then just Jay not really knowing why Alex has changed and why he's doing all these nice things for him, so he's just sitting there trying to figure out what Alex wants from him in return for all these nice things. (the answer to that being: alex wants him heartbroken enough to save himself)
Get yourself an Adderall Then throw me up against the wall And kick me when I have to crawl Ooh, I love it when you show no love at all You know I can be your part-time lover Our scars, they'll dance with each other I can be your part-time lover Our scars, they'll dance with each other
Okay, hear me out, this bit's about their dynamic, shocker... even tho it makes it sound a lot more toxic and abusive than it actually was. They were both mostly happy with the dynamic and neither were trying to hurt each other. They just both kinda wanted it to be a romantic relationship when it wasn't, but Alex was scared of that, and Jay wasn't gonna push it for fear of losing what he already had so far. And he'd rather have that than nothing.
"Ooh, I love it when you show no love at all" at first i thought this bit would be Jay, but now that i think about it, it's Alex to me. He liked it when Jay didn't show him any love back in college, because it made it easier to ignore his own feelings for him.
Why don't you just take what you want from me? I think you should take what you want and leave Why don't you just take what you want from me? I think you should take what you want and leave
What you want from me? Yeah What you want from me? Yeah
You're changin' You're changin' every day You played me I let you win again You're changin' You're changin' every day And you're takin' You're takin' everything
They are in fact changing, yup. Probably Jay talking about Alex, Alex changed up their usual dynamic when they got back to his house, then it turned out that all the niceness was just a way to break Jay's heart even worse. He just got his feelings played with, and he didn't really do anything to stop it, because he liked how Alex was treating him too much. Which like, fair.
#Headache is now a migraine and this has sat in my inbox for far too long already. so im just posting it#GREAT SONG MY DUDE. I am simply tired. you can make up some very intelligent song analysis stuff and pretend I said it lol#I may have set myself up for failure by doing my lil lyric analysis things cos now im like#“if i dont do that i will have failed to show i like the song and appreciate being given it oh nooooooo” which is silly but whoops#marble hornets#jay merrick#alex kralie#jaylex#marble hornets fanfic#MH sorry its locked
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I love to talk but I rly do feel like we have to be talking for a minimum of 8 hours straight before I feel like I can even begin to rly broach things on my mind or that have been bothering me a lot that I actually want to talk abt without being vague or deflecting or omitting or lying and if the conversation takes a break at any point it resets back to 0 and its still nice regardless but.
#we're all just desperately chasing each other around for a semblance of connection in this cold bleak world#but unfortunately due to the relentless crushing pressures of capitalism we also have to work so no time for that#man. sorry just frustrated n miserable now. wish i was capable of feeling close to other ppl wish i could give other ppl that connection#but instead we're just ships in the night passing by or whatever#and i have to settle with not rly being known or wanted or important in other ppls lives and its forever. btw#bc even if ppl do think they know me or do want me around or i am important to them in some way.. the specific torture labyrinth i call#home is constructed in the most elegant and precise way that im incapable of believing them to be sincere anyway#so thats all on me! if I tried harder and made more of an effort to communicate with or trust ppl i wouldnt feel this way!#but i dont so better luck in the next life i guess! this is why i dont think abt this shit bc it makes me want to kms#whats even the point man#dont even worry abt me im fine just need to fucking vent bc i dont have time to allow myself to feel anything bc i have plans tmr#so i need to go to bed early. and ill just try my best to keep distracted forever so ill never need to face how pathetically desperate#i am for any kind of emotional intimacy whatsoever and also physical contact but im not normal enough to fulfil any of my own needs#yeah well. its my life that i have to live and im the one making it this way. digging my grave and lying in it innit#its fine tho bc they make repressed fictional characters that i can project onto instead of confronting any of my issues#so ill just be here in my labyrinth doing that. while everyone else gets to see sunlight and grass and whatever#im just so tired i dont want to do this i want to pretend i dont care and dont need it and maybe itll become true. its too much for me#let me know when they need me to pilot the jaeger and drift with someone and thru our mindmelding i can finally achieve intimacy and trust#well anyway. that was embarrassing. hope it works out for everyone else#hope my flatmate gets her ideal life w our other old flatmates and finds a convenient way of discarding me from that like they want#except im going to make it as difficult as possible for as long as i can for them to get rid of me bc im selfish and want what i want so.#my obligate parasite ass. or whatever. im going to throw up if i keep thinking so thats a good place to stop and go to sleep probably#.vent#dont interact im being stupid as fuck and dont care just leave me alone thanks
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im so miserable idk why any of you follow me lol
#this has been an original post#personal spewage#i guess cause im good at pretending im not#im good at faking it#well. sometimes i am#not so much rn#anyway what im trying to say is i dont blame you for getting tired of it#im tired of it too#im trying not to say as much on here#i made a whole separate acct so i could go be miserable over there where none of you had to see it#. hell#ive got several accts where i can go be miserable where no one has to see#i just.#i want ppl to know#i want ppl to know im suffering#im tired of screaming into the void#writing things down where the only one who'll ever see it is a future me#i just. want ppl to know#sorry.#ill be better later
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Sorry for making a deep dish mess in your inbox. I hope you have a nice fun week and feel less tired by the weekend. You're pretty awesome.
unless you sent like ten asks about punk the other night, it wasn't just you, but thank you all the same. 💜
but full disclosure, it is exhausting to get asks on a subject i simply don't engage with. even a hey, did you know can be exhausting when it comes out of nowhere about something im not actively talking about.
i love to info dump and talk about things, and i love when people want to info dump at me. but there has to be some level of "hey, you got the brain space?" because ive been pretty open that, right now, i really, really don't. depression is kicking my ass and im hurtling toward burnout, to the point where im barely engaging with the wrestling i do watch, let alone paying any mind to what i don't.
i love you all, and im very happy that anyone ever wants to talk to me about literally anything, but please can we start just like. asking if it's a good time, please? like, as a community? just a simple, hey, can i tell you about would be appreciated, especially when it's not part of a conversation that im already actively having or posting about.
sorry if this was wildly cunty, it's early and i haven't put on my human filter yet and i didn't mean for it to be
#asks!#sorry to be a whole bitch#but in am just so tired#my own special interest are becoming a chore#i am distressingly open about a lot of things including my dogshit brain#so im gonna be open about this too#i dont have the brain for much of anything rn#and i just simply cant muscle through and pretend otherwise#even for the sake of friends#and im being open about that so no one relies on me for more than i can give here for a bit#kay? kay
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why are some resident evil fans so. weird abt avan jogia playing leon?? they only ever say stuff like "he should be playing carlos" and im starting to think they're just racist LOL bc they did a VERY good job playing leon especially in terms of re2 1998 leon and i don't know why they're so obsessed with his skin color!!
#im not going to sit hwre and pretend that wtrc was a perfect movie bc it wasnt! but it certainly was fun!!!!#avan jogia isnt even the same ethnicity as carlos u guys only see them as a darker skinned person and immediately say he#shouldnt be playing a white character whats up with that#SORRY I AM JUST. tired of people on tiktok just being so blatantly mean#resident evil#talks
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I feel so numb, I am barley here anymore. I am an empty shell. I put on my mask to hide who I am now. I thought I knew numb and pain no I did not. I am at the point where I do not know anymore.
#sad thoughts#emotionally exhausted#im done#orginal poetry#i am so tired#i am sorry#play pretend#Spotify
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Sorry for hjiacking your post but you just made something click for me! For months i've been seeing people saying there were ancients on the surface when i was pretty sure there was a pearl stating it had become impossible to live there. One sentence i remember clearly was 'we are across the river and have kicked out the boat.'
Now i realize that there WERE ancients on the surface, but only until pebbles was finalized. The rain from two iterators was likely too much to live in and, as far as i understand, some ancients refused to go onto the iterators (because they hated them, as we see here) and the remaining ones had no choice but to make everything automated (like that farm arrays (?) pearl) and go up to the surface, probably only coming down to do manteinance. The graffiti such as these, with five pebbles in them were likely made in the in between stage, when the higher ups were still deciding if the rains were truly worsening enough to justify letting more people up above the clouds. (Spoiler alert: they were. They were probably getting worse globally but i don't know the lore well enough to say that lol)
This would also mean that:
Compared to other iterator complexes, Moon and Pebbles' shared grounds likely had worse rains than other places for a long time. (You decide if thats until Moon stopped getting water or if the rains got bad enough globally to amount to the same amount they were already putting out. I think it's the second one personally.)
Five Pebbles had A Lot more power over his citizens than the average iterator (again, until the rains got worse globally). If before he was built an ancient could still survive live somewhat comfortably on the surface, after his completion there was no way for anyone to survive below the cloud layer for a prolonged period of time, making it necessary for everyone to stay on top of his structure and never come down. If my previous point is true, this would be very unusual for anyone from another iterator's complex to hear. Ergo, the exterior pearl. (The one where Moon calls the ancients skin parasites.) I realize now the conversation it belonged to was probably not between one of the citizens that decided to stay on Moon and one from Pebbles' city, but between the latter and someone from a different complex, who couldn't have known how bad it had become for them and was still on the side of those upset about the shaded citadel thing. They were at his mercy for everything, and they were probably the first to ever get to that point. (This probably didn't help his then still developing god complex. Lmao)
Five Pebbles and Looks to the Moon were the only ones in a situation such as the one with the shaded citadel. No other iterator was built in a place that was That controversial. Which may have been obvious to some but is yet another realization to me. This is kind of off topic from the rest of my points but my melatonin has kicked in and i do not have the energy to remember if this was the point i wanted to make or if there was something else i wanted to say. <3
Please tell me if i got any lore or anything wrong! I love worldbuilding but i often forget about important details here and there. Tell me what you think :)
i was looking through the graffiti in the wiki and saw this one, i wonder what does it mean?
maybe those others are scrapped iterators and the graffiti is saying "you are next pebbles!" or something like it?
i dunno
I think it’s more so protest from the ancients who lived on the surface! One iterator raining on you is bad enough.. but two?
We hate iterators!! We hate Pebbles!! Get rid of him!! Sort of thing. Most graffiti regarding iterators on the surface is negative!
I’m pretty sure Moon mentions how after Pebbles’ construction a lot of ancients who lived on the surface had to flee to the outer expanse? If I’m not mistaken/don’t misunderstand.
#also sorry if im being annoying or anything. i know i probably am not as you seem to appreciate discussions but like. social anxiety go brr#i almost didnt send this but with the time it took me to write this i just thought fuck it we ball so here you go#rain world#five pebbles#i would talk about the whole shaded citadel fiasco as well but that is off topic and also im tired as hell. but that makes me go insane so#i had to mention it somewhere here. like damn no one likes this iterator not the ones on the surface and not the ones above the clouds.#he is so good at pretending it doesnt affect him. (this probably also did something to his mind. having people who dislike you for#something completely out of your control be at your mercy.)#okay off topic thing over goodnight
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— homework ★ matt sturniolo



— CONTENTS: making out; oral (f receiving); handjob (m receiving); sub!matt

— NOTES: my plan was to post this during the weekend but im anxious to go back to college and i couldn’t help myself and ended up writing everything yesterday lol very nerdy subby matty receiving his first handjob ♡ as usual not proofread but hope you enjoy it lots! tysm for over 1,1K followers ♡ much much love always!
i heard three rhythmic knocks on my bedroom door and quickly got up, unlocking it and suddenly bumping into matthew, the smartest guy in my class. matt was clever, but extremely quiet - which only made him more charming. i recalled his ears turning a bright red when i asked him for help with my homework, shyness taking over him as he briefly nodded his head.
“hey!” he greeted me, offering a handshake. i touched his hand, slightly caressing his palm with my index, watching as he tried to look away. “we talked yesterday, about… some lessons? you need help with homework?”
“yes!” i happily agreed, spreading the door open. “come in matt, make yourself comfortable”
matt nodded, holding tightly to the books hidden under his arm. “is it really okay for me to be here?” he chuckled. “i mean… it’s the girls dorm”
“don’t worry about it, boys come here all the time” i winked at matt’s figure, balancing his weight from one foot to another, clearly anxious. “unless you… wanna go to the library or something?”
“no!” he eagerly answered. “i-i can teach you here. it’s okay”.
i wasn’t listening to a single world he said.
matt’s blue eyes underneath the round glasses seemed agitated, following the numbers i had previously written on my notebook. i could see matt’s lips trying to hold a smile at each wrong result, his digits tapping on the yellow pencil between his fingers.
“… so if you divide it by 100, it’s easier to find the percentage” he took me out of my trance, turning his head to stare at me with a confused expression on his face. “am i doing good? are you getting it?”
“you’re doing so good, matt” i let it slip out of my mouth without even thinking, my head resting on my hand while i admired matt’s cheeks flushing red as he gulped. “look at me” i said, raising my finger to his jaw as he tried to look away.
i could feel his breath getting heavier, lips slightly parted as he stood still, not moving an inch. i got closer to him, brushing my lips over his before sealing them together in a small kiss. matt’s hand quickly went to the back of my neck, deepening the pressure of his lips against mine. when i opened my mouth so he could slide his tongue in, matt pulled away - but not far enough, a string of saliva still connecting us to each other.
“i-i’m sorry” he looked at me, panting heavily. “i shouldn’t have done that, i’m really sorry”.
“don’t be” i cupped his cheeks in my palms, giving him a soft peck. “i want it matt, i really do”
“but” he started, eyes traveling through the room, as if he was checking if someone caught us. “i thought y-you wanted to study”
“you already taught me so much” i jokingly pouted, pretending i was tired. the more matt talked, the wetter my panties would get. “why don’t i teach you a few things?” i said, letting one of my hands rest on his thigh.
“like what?” matt asked me hesitantly, looking at how my hand caressed his covered skin. i reached closer to his crotch, accidentally brushing my digits on his half-hard cock, tenting starting to form on his pants.
i smashed our lips together once more, this time hungrier, the wet sounds of our tongues interlocking taking over my dorm. my fingers tangled on matt’s brown curls, carefully pulling his hair so i could get easier access to his neck. i unbuttoned the closed collar of his shirt, traveling down the fabric and repeating the process over and over again.
matt took his glasses off, tossing it over my study table, his hands finally coming to my waist. he didn’t have the courage to tighten his grip and i knew this was the boldest move he’d be able to make, so i grabbed matt’s wrist and brought his palm to my chest, letting him grope my covered tits.
i gasped from the sudden touch, noticing how this made made hesitant to keep kissing me. “a-are you okay?” he asked with puppy, blue eyes.
“yes, fuck- you’re being so good to me”, i sighed heavily and matt nodded eagerly, bringing his mouth to my neck, sucking onto my skin. “what got you so worked up hm?” i asked as i watched his pants getting tighter, fully hard cock.
“fuck! i’m sorry- i didn’t even notice” matt looked down, eyes widening. “you’re just so pretty” he confessed.
“you’re so cute, matt. do you want me to help you out?” i asked, palming him over his jeans.
“please” he let out in a choked moan, “please touch me”
the grin on my face grew wide as matt sunk his teeth on his bottom lip, trying to cover his soft whimpers as i kept on stroking his clothed cock.
i unzipped his jeans, sneaking my fingers into his underwear so i could pull out matt’s dick, which quickly sprung against my palm, almost hitting his own belly. matt adjusted himself on the chair, spreading his legs apart as his mouth hang open. i finally got a proper grip of his shaft, wrapping my fingers around his surprisingly large cock.
matt let out a loud groan when i finally started twisting my hand, lifting his left arm to cover his own face. “why are you so shy, baby?” i whispered in his ear.
“n-never… never done that” matt said, squirming on his sit as i pumped him.
“never had a girl touching you like that?” i cooed, watching matt nodding vigorously. “it’s okay, i promise it’s gonna feel good”
“it- mhm- feels good!” he bucked his hips forward when i moved my thumb upwards, circling his leaking tip. “i’m not g-gonna last long” matt said as i tightened the grasp on his length. he kept on jointing his hips, trying to fuck into my fist in a pathetic, sloppy pace.
“you wanna cum for me, matt? wanna show how much of a good boy you are?” i kissed his cheek and tucked his hair behind his red ear, continuously jerking him off.
“fuck, please!” he said, the loudest he’d been the entire night. “i’m your good boy! wanna cum, p-please”
“go ahead” i allowed him, peppering pecks on his damp forehead, sweat dripping from his neck all the day down to his tummy, which was soon painted white from matt’s release. he threw his head back, whimpering as he came on my hand, thick spurt messing us both.
i got up to wash my hands and grab him a towel, letting matt rest as he came from his high, chest still rising rapidly.
“thank you” he mumbled when i offered to clean him up. “i’m sorry i made such a mess” matt chuckled, watching as i wiped his cum off. “don’t apologize, you did really well babyboy” i praised.
“can… can i try?” he asked me, reaching for his glasses over the table. he quickly put them on again, reading my confused expression. “i wanna make you feel good too” matt said, turning his body to face me.
“you want me to teach you how to please a girl?” i teased him, bringing both of my legs to my chest, exposing the back of my thighs to him.
matt checked me out from head to toe, stopping where my feet landed and not being able to take his eyes off the panties i purposely wore. i knew he’d love pink. “no, not any girl. you- wanna be good for you” he confessed, sliding off his chair and kneeling on the ground.
i widened my eyes, not expecting matt’s sudden move. he touched the hem of my shorts, silently asking me to take them off. i quickly removed it, letting it slide down my legs along with my panties, fully exposing my pussy to him.
“oh, fuck” he mumbled. “it’s so pretty and it’s… it’s all wet”
“you did that to me” i told him, moving my hair to the side so i could get a better look of matt eating me out for the first time.
“how should i do it?” he asked, blue eyes looking for reassurance. my hands went to his brown curls, bringing his face closer to my crotch.
matt stuck his tongue out, slowly licking my lower lips. he widened his eyes once again, probably surprised by the taste and gave it another try as i giggled at his shy performance. matt’s large hands went to my thighs, forcing my legs open as he fully went for it, pressuring a kiss against my clit. i gasped when he started to swirl his tongue on me, spit drooling down his chin as he licked me in the messiest, sloppiest way.
“matt” i called but he didn’t even listen, still eating me out, only raising his eyebrows as he looked at me through his glasses. “you never done this before?” i sighed deeply, tangling my fingers on his hair as i lowered my hips on him.
matt hummed something, probably agreeing with what i had asked, but this only send a wave of vibrations through my folds, my thighs suddenly closing around his head as i felt my orgasm approaching. he was way too good for a virgin.
“matt- fuck!” i moaned loudly, the knot on my lower belly begging to be released. “i’m gonna cum!” i warned as he was about the have a taste for the first time. he moved downwards and started to tease my entrance, his tongue pushing inside my slit as i kept on moving my hips, practically humping his face.
matt continued to eat me out as my orgasm washed over me, making me throw my head back and my body tremble due the overstimulation. i had to pull his hair so he’d remove himself from me, watching his swollen lips covered with my cum. matt licked my release and went back to my thighs, biting my bare skin. “enough, baby” i moaned, feeling his hands holding me in place. “matthew, i said enough”.
he groaned in protest, not wanting to stop. matt gave a few more kisses down my legs, pulling away and staring at me with puppy eyes. i caressed his brown strands, soon cupping his cheeks and sealing our lips. “you did really well for a first time, matt” i thanked him as he got up, sliding his jeans back on.
“so…” he started. “i’m guessing you gave up on your homework?”
“of course not” i rolled my eyes, watching as he buttoned his shirt. “i’m gonna need this good boy to help me every week”.
#matthew sturniolo#matthew sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo x reader#matt x reader#matt x y/n#sub!matt#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo imagine#sturniolo x reader#christopher sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#nick sturniolo#maria's fics#maria writes matt
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surprise || op81
☆ summary: oscar surprises his partner on valentine’s day
☆ pairing: oscar piastri x nonfamous!reader
☆ fc & warnings: none
☆ requested: nope
masterlist
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
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yourbff: DIVA DOWN
ynuser: it rough out here bestie i miss you and osco and im so tired
yourbff: my queen 😭 i miss you more and i know he does too bb. only a little bit more time and you’ll get to see him in aus!! plusssss im seeing you this weekend
ynuser: ugh i know i know it’s just a spilled coffee day and im emotional
user1: liammmmmm noooooo 😫
lando: rip
ynuser: rip is right
user2: i love how you just be a normal girly going to work and also dating the op81 like
oscarpiastri: spilled coffee or not you still look incredible
ynuser: thank you sweetheart
oscarpiastri: of course gorgeous. i just sent you £20 - go get another coffee on me please
ynuser: oscar 😭😭😭😭😭😭
mclarenf1: nooooo coffee in aus is on us!!
ynuser: love you admin 🧡
user3: girl i need you to post a grwm ur makeup is always flawless
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yourbff: OSCHINA 🗣️ i need ur assistance
oscarpiastri: lol what’s up?
yourbff: your darling girlfriend is down bad and i know she’s trying to pretend like she’s not for your sake but i think we should organize a lil something something to lift her spirits
oscarpiastri: already in the works. i was actually going to text you to ask for help
user2: i’m obsessed actually
mclarenf1: nice
user4: the home race hoodie!! take 💳 my 💳 money 💳
ynuser: cutie patootie i love the new helmet! p.s can’t wait for my piastri home race jumper to come in the mail
oscarpiastri: it should be there on friday with a special delivery 😉
ynuser: oooooo can’t wait
user5: this is gonna be your year oscar i just know it
user6: i can’t wait to see that fresh lid on track
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yourbff: i really hope you removed her from your close friends list before posting this
oscarpiastri: i did don’t worry! and she for sure is going to be at the restaurant we talked about at 7 right?
yourbff: yes!! she thinks she’s meeting me there for #galentines. you’re lucky i’m letting you steal my valentine
oscarpiastri: i am lucky that’s for sure! thank you for all your help ❤️
lando: omg are you going to see y/n/n
oscarpiastri: correct! gonna surprise her for valentine’s day
lando: C U T E
nicolepiastri: i wish you were coming home but go get that girl!!
oscarpiastri: i’ll be home soon ❤️
logansargeant: better be going to see y/n 🤨
oscarpiastri: i am 🥹 miss you man
mclarenf1: have fun oscar!
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user2: hot hot hot hot
yourbff: oh my god you’re gorgeous. i’m gonna have the hottest date tn
ynuser: stopppppp thank you
user7: oscar is the luckiest man in the world
oscarpiastri: wow sorry i just started drooling
ynuser: hahaha oscar 😂
oscarpiastri: can’t help it! you’re so insanely beautiful 😍😫
ynuser: and i’m all yours baby
oscarpiastri: mm thank goodness
alexandrasaintmleux: you’re stunning. i hope you know that baby girl
ynuser: alex i’m gonna cry 😭
user8: WOOF WOOF WOOF sorry idk what came over me there
iamrebeccad: happy valentines beautiful
ynuser: happy valentines darling!! i hope carlos treated you like the queen you are
iamrebeccad: i hope oscar does the same 😉
user9: idk if i wanna be you or be with you

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user5: may this sort of love find me
yourbff: 🤍🤍🤍 adorable
oscarpiastri: yes ❤️
user6: couple goals
ynuser: i’m sorry for ugly crying at dinner. thank you so much for flying all the way here to see me!! i know how crazy things are getting with the season so close😭🤍
oscarpiastri: never apologize for feeling your feelings baby. there’s no place i’d rather be than with you
ynuser: how did i get so lucky????
oscarpiastri: i often ask myself the same thing
user9: oscar you have to stop setting the bar for men so high
iamrebeccad: give her a hug for me
oscarpiastri: done 🫶🏻
mclarenf1: our favorite girl 💐🧡
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oscarpiastri: spent the weekend with my forever valentine
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opeightyone: our favorite duo 🤍
user9: my mom and dad 🗣️
lando: ewwwwww this is rlly cute
oscarpiastri: thanks?
user14: i just showed this to my partner and asked why they didn’t do this for me
ynuser: forever and always ❤️
oscarpiastri: promise?
ynuser: yes handsome 😘
user12: end game end game end game
nicolepiastri: love you both so much
ynuser: love YOU mama piastri
user14: y’all are the blueprint 🥹
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
a/n: thanks for reading!! likes and reblogs appreciated 🤍 happy valentine’s day 🫶🏻
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction
© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform
#f1 fandom#formula 1#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#oscar piastri social media au#oscar piastri x yn#oscar piastri smau#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri imagine#op81 social media au#op81 x you#op81 x y/n#op81 smau#op81 fluff#op81 imagine#op81 x reader#op81 fic
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Post war/coma comic about Gai struggling with his recovery
Since tumblr hates long form comics, I have to split this into 2 bc its 36 images. This is the first part, part 2 i'll either do as a reblog or a separate post right after this, stay tuned! Links to support me in pinned post <3
tw: s*icidal thoughts, injury, a little blood
Bisuke: Gai's Back!
Gai: GRAAH!
Kks: Im home Gai: Welcome back Kks: [wheels rolling] Hey,
Kks: Ga-!? Gai: Im fine. The tile is cool on my face. Kks: Wanna go lay down in bed? Gai: I am so /sick/ of lying down. Kks: Ok. What do you want for supper?
Gai: You're not going to comment? Kks: I already know what happened. You overdid it again. I should be able to keep up with chores, kakashi. Kks: You can. Just don' bull through it all in one go. Do you want to end up in the hospital again? Gai: Please don't. Kks: I know sitting still is hard for you, and "too much" is in your DNA, but you have to take this slow so you don't exacerbate your injuries, Gai. You went from hyper-aware to pretending your body limits dont exist. Gai: Like you haven't done the same.
Gai: You've proved your point. Kks: It's not about that. And you've dragged me to bed and out of bed repeatedly when I needed it. You were burning alive from the inside. Tsunade told you your immune system is out of whack. You need to take it easy. /I/ know you're capable, but are you trying to prove to /yourself/ you are? Gai: You want me to admit my embarrassment? Kks: If something serioud happens, You'll be even more embarrassed then
Gai: How could you possibly know how I FEEL?! How could you EVER KNOW HOW I FEEL?! Kks: I DON'T! But I've /been/ the one ouking and sobbing on your bathroom floor because I couldn't take living anymore! And I don't want that for YOU!
Kks: I'm sorry, Gai. Gai: I'm sorry
Kks: I can't stand knowing you're in pain, and I can't get you help. If there was a way, I'd do anything. Gai: You do so much to help me already.... And I yelled at you Kks: I've screamed at you so much, that was pretty tame. I wish I was like you with things like this. Not great with what to say...... But I can listen.
Gai: I hate feeling so weak. I'm tired all the time, in constant pain, I can't even walk-..... I can tell tenten and the boys worry despite my efforts to appear positive. Kks: They're just not sure how to react. They know you hate being babied, but don't want to push you into hurting yourself. You hate being told you can't do something. They love you. You get stronger everyday, everyone is cheering you on.
Gai: I know it's irrational, but... I feel like you gave up the Hokage position to take care of me. Kks: Haa!? I'm grateful if anything. I'd be retired too if I could. That'd be amazing. I'm dreading just helping Tsunade but as long as you're by my side, I'll be fine. We're still equals, rivals, friends, partners
Gai: Even if I can't- Kks: /Always/ wil be, dickhead. Gai: You worry about me hurting myself? Kks: I know you think about it
Kks: We're the same in that regard Gai: I would never act on this, please believe me, these thoughts are rare........... Kks: It's ok, Gai. Gai: Sometimes I think i should have just died. I feel so out of place on the streets I used to feel so at home at. I never asked to live. I didn't plan to. I just don't know how to-...
Kks: I understand that. Though, dying didn't feel any better. Gai: I know I didn't fully pass like you did. I didn't see papa. Just for a moment, I wish I could have seen him.
Kks: As much as I'm sure he wants to see you again, It's too soon. Dai'd slap the shit out of you for wanting to waste your youth just to see him. Gai: [chuckle] probably. Kks: I have those thoughts less and less now, but they're still there. "why am I the one who survives?" "Burden" "Gai will come to his senses eventually"
Gai: FALSE!! None of my grief is with you! I love living here with you! My love for you only burns hotter each day! You're so lovely inside and out! Kks: Maa What did I do to deserve such praise from teh mouth of the hottest man in Konoha?? Gai: YOU STILL THINK I'M HOT?! Kks: YOU-! [CACKLE]
Kks: Your bad taste is the only reason I had a chance before someone snatched you up. Gai: The worst. Kks: Thought we'd irritate eachother, but it's been pretty smooth. Even though you still get played by the dogs. Gai: You really wanna throw those stones?
Gai: They play you just as easily. don't lie. Kks: My point is, whatever you need from me, you have it. No questions asked. Even if you yell and scream, i can take it. You held me together when I was unraveling, and I'll never forget it. Didn't trust anyone else to see me like that. Broken
Gai: I never saw you as that. Kks: I'll never see you as that
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