#sorry it’s super short and not even close to edited so I hope it doesn’t suck!!!

[steddieas-shegoes]

It could have started when Eddie was basically living with Steve during his constant physical therapy post-Vecna.

It could have started when Steve took Eddie out for “adults only” dinners and movies that no other adult was invited to.

It could have started when Eddie visited Steve at work every shift to make sure he ate lunch, and giving him a very serious, no-way-you’re-getting-away-with-not-eating look.

It could have started when Steve had a migraine that almost had Robin dragging him to the hospital until Eddie stepped in and offered to keep watch over him for three days straight.

But it was hard to tell because Steve and Eddie circulated each other like the planets revolve around the sun, and circles don’t really have a beginning, or an end.

*************

“Dingus! Your boyfriend is here!”

“He’s not my boyfriend, Robs!”

Robin and Steve managed to work most shifts together, which helped the time pass. They bickered like siblings, though, and when Eddie showed up, Robin tended to annoy them both or completely disappear.

Steve was clueless as to why and Robin refused to give him any hints. “You’ll understand when you’re older,” she’d said with an eye roll and snort.

“Did you just call me his boyfriend?”

Eddie would hate to hear it, but he was like a ray of sunshine anytime he entered a room. At least if you asked Steve, that’s what he’d say, and he’d probably blush the entire time he said it.

He wouldn’t acknowledge it.

He’d pretend he thought that about a lot of people.

He’d be lying.

“I did. Maybe you two shouldn’t be so obvious all the time.”

Eddie and Steve just stared blankly at Robin.

“Steve’s not even gay!”

“Eddie doesn’t even like me like that!”

They both spoke at once, turning to each other in shock.

“I do like you like that!”

“I’m into both!”

They both spoke at once again. Robin just started laughing and walked away.

“You like me?”

“You like guys?”

Okay, deep breath. One at a time.

“You go first,” Steve said, hoping Eddie would clear any doubts from his head.

“I’ve been halfway in love with you for months, Stevie. I thought,” Eddie cleared his throat, awkwardly looking down at the floor. “I thought I was being too obvious sometimes. But I knew you weren’t into me back so. I mean we can still be friends. I don’t wanna lose you.”

Steve took a step closer to him.

“I’ve been halfway in love with you for months, too. I just thought you were being nice to me.”

Eddie chuckled and shook his head at the floor before looking up at Steve.

Beautiful, incredible, stupid Steve.

Never believing that anyone could care about him for him.

“I think maybe we’ve been dating this whole time.”

Steve’s jaw dropped, but closed quickly, his mouth settling on a soft smile.

“I guess maybe we have. What gave it away?”

“Probably the fact that you’re attached at the hip and any time someone mentions either of you to the other you get this dumb lovestruck look on your faces,” Robin stuck her head out from an aisle to yell at them.

“Shut it, Robin!”

She went back to what she was doing, deciding whatever meddling she’d managed was probably enough.

“So let me get this straight…”

“That may be difficult for both of us,” Steve let out.

Eddie cackled. “Oh god. I think I’m more than halfway in love with you,” he got out between laughter.

Steve joined him, mostly happy because Eddie was happy.

He probably should have realized this a lot sooner. Like, way sooner.

When they finally calmed down, they stared at each other with the look Robin was probably describing.

Lovestruck was a word for it, but it was more than that.

They were two people who never should’ve even been in the same circle, and they weren’t until they had to be. But since then, they’d chosen to be a part of each others’ lives. They’d chosen to support each other, and rely on each other, and trust the other person to be what they needed through it all.

They existed as two separate people still, Steve would never wrap himself up in someone so much that he lost himself. Not again.

But they had spent months becoming a pair, unbeknownst to them, and it made them better, it made them find ways to grow amongst trauma no one could imagine but them.

When they kissed, there weren’t fireworks, there wasn’t a world-ending realization that this was the love of their life, or even a racing heartbeat.

There was something that settled though. Something they hadn’t realized had been waiting for months while they danced around each other.

Not even Robin’s cheering from across the store could ruin their moment.

[astermath]

“So? Whatever.”

pairing: dave lizewski x popular!fem!reader 

summary: The preppy girl that just about everyone admires has more in common with Dave than he expects. He doesn’t quite know how to handle this information, but it excites him nonetheless.

word count: 2K

♡ LANDING PAGE♡

notes: I haven’t written something like this in a good while, so please bear with me if I’m rusty or there are some mistakes here and there. Reader is referred to with she/her pronouns, I tried to be as non descriptive as possible about her appearance. I do love writing a bit of a mean reader like this, but don’t worry, she’ll warm up to him. This fic takes place in senior year for age purposes, I’m pretty much fully ignoring the timeline of the film. Comments and/or requests are super welcome btw!! Hope you enjoy!! <3

(ps this will get a part two don’t worry xx)

To Dave, girls like you were unreachable. You could hear about them, you could listen to them talk in the hallways, sneak a glance their way… But talk to them? Any single one of their group would consider that social suicide. The only reason any of them even looked in his direction was to ask him to do their homework. So why in god’s name were you at his locker? Why were you acknowledging his existence at all?

“What’s that?” You leaned against the locker next to his, pointing at the piece of a comic book panel he’d taped to the door. It pictured Spider-man putting on his mask for the first time, something Dave looked to when he needed some motivation for the day. 

He struggled to get basically any words out, still not fully registering that you’re within such close range. He could smell you… God that was really weird to think about, he felt like a creep already, but you just… Smelled really nice. Like vanilla, mixed with something sweet. He realized he hadn’t answered your question yet and was just staring in front of him like a weirdo. “O-Oh, yeah, that’s uh… That’s Spider-man. It’s this… This superhero I like.” He adjusted the strap of his backpack to keep his hands busy.

You smiled and rolled your eyes. “Duh, I know who Spider-man is, please.” You couldn’t help but think he was doing anything to avoid looking into your eyes, as if you’d turn him to stone if he dared to do so. Which, yes, was exactly how he felt.

“I wanted to know which comic that was from. The art style looks a lot different than the ones I’ve seen.” Now this part was pretty much making his teenage brain short circuit. He probably didn’t hear that right, there’s no way a popular girl like you read comics, right? This had to be some kind of elaborate joke, like you were trying to pull a prank on him by making him ramble about his favorite superheroes. However, he wasn’t close minded. Even if this was a prank, at least you were talking to him, right?

“Yeah, sorry, I uh… Forget he’s a pretty popular character sometimes. This one’s from a collector’s edition. One of the pages was kinda falling apart so I just… Taped my favorite panel to my locker.” Again, he tried to look anywhere else, but it felt rude not to be making eye contact with the person who’s trying to give you a chance at a conversation. His eyes met yours and he realised he hadn’t ever actually seen you up close like this. You were really pretty, he knew that, but he never noticed these particular things about you before. The way your hair framed your features so nicely, the little beauty mark that seemed to be somehow perfectly placed, or the way a dimple appeared on your right cheek when you smiled.

“Hopefully you didn’t pay too much for it, those things cost like, a fortune.” You followed, snapping him out of his haze as you twirled a piece of hair between your index and middle finger. Dave was much taller than you, so you had to look up to match his gaze, which was already hard since he kept avoiding your eyes. You never realized how much he’d matured since freshman year. He looked pretty cute… Really cute, actually. 

“S-So, uhm, I really don‘t wanna be rude, but…” He closed his locker before looking at you with a rather awkward expression. “Why are you here? Why are you… talking to me?” Honestly, not an unjustified question. Dave was often the subject of bullying, and the popular girls clique made no exception to that rule. He doesn’t remember you specifically doing anything, although... He has a vague memory of you being in the car with those jocks when they threw spoiled milk at him.

“What? A girl can’t talk to her fellow classmate? This is a free country, you know.” You pretended to be a little hurt by his assumption that you were probably just here to make fun of him. In all honesty he was still a little dumbfounded by this whole ordeal, and the fact that half the people that passed you were giving you two weird looks really wasn’t helping. “You know I sit behind you in English, right?” He responds by nodding. He is painfully aware of this fact, as your friends had expressed their empathy for you when your seat was assigned behind him, though you honestly didn’t mind. And also the fact that he got a fair share of gossip from you and your best friend always whispering to each other. “Well,” you flipped a bit of hair over your shoulder. “I saw you had a copy of Birth of Venom in your backpack, and I... Wanted to ask if I could borrow it...” You looked to the side, muttering the last part. As much as you tried not to care what people thought, you did have a bit of a reputation that you were stuck to. Liking comics wasn’t for you, you were a cheerleader, you went to parties, you liked shopping. Okay, you secretly liked comics.

Dave looked at you with a puzzled expression. “I-I’m sorry, can you repeat tha--”

“Can I borrow your stupid comic or what?” You interrupted him, clearly looking a bit embarrassed. 

“Oh!” His face was getting hot, this conversation was lasting way longer than he imagined it would. Usually he’d have his face shoved into his locker by now. “U-Uhm, sure! It’s a bit expensive, but... Well, just don’t damage it, please.” He took his backpack off his shoulder and was about to pull it out before you grabbed his arm. 

“Not here you dumbass! Just, like... Ugh, meet me at my car after school’s over, you can hand it to me then.” You were acting like this was some kind of illegal drug deal, but this truly was something important to you. Your dad had already made it very clear that he didn’t want his little girl becoming some kind of tomboy and have her mind run rampant with superhero stories. Especially with this Kickass guy running around...

The bell rang and you silently thanked it for doing so. “Look, I gotta go. White Corvette, by the vending machines.” You walked past him, and a waft of that lovely vanilla scent hit his nose. He damn near melted into the floor when your arm brushed against his. “Later, Lizewksi.”

You leaned against the hood of your car, scrolling on your phone as you waited for the brunette to show up. You couldn’t help but feel a little guilty that you were just meeting him in secret like this. It’s not like you were embarrassed to be seen with him, or that you didn’t like him, it’s just that liking comics and superheroes was just about the dorkiest thing anyone could be into. Especially with Kickass running around, and, well, kicking ass, people would probably be thinking you’d be into this whole vigilante business yourself. Sure, you thought it was cool that people were doing something about all the crime, but you’d rather die than mess up your hair beating some thug’s ass. 

You noticed someone approaching and noticed that Dave wasn’t alone. With a bit of a disgusted expression, you gestured to his two sidekicks. “I don’t remember inviting the entire geek entourage to come see me. This isn’t some kinda meet and greet, you know.” Todd and Marty seemed, just like Dave before, a little shocked that you were talking to them. 

“S-Sorry, they just uh...” Dave began.

“We didn’t believe him.” Todd followed.

“...believe what?” You questioned, crossing your arms.

“That a chick like you was into comics.” Marty said, before Todd smacked him on the back of the head. “Dude! Don’t say it like that!”

You got a bit flustered, and looked at Dave. “You told them!? What the fuck, Lizewski?”

“I-I’m sorry!” He held up his hands. “They were asking me what we were talking about, and... I panicked.” They were more so insinuating that he was flirting with her, and he didn’t want that rumor going around, in case your jock brother caught wind of that and beat his ass for flirting with his sister.

You sighed, looking down and pinching the bridge of your nose before waving your hand out in a dismissive manner. “It’s... whatever, just leave. Before I change my mind and throw a bitch fit.” His two friends gave him a suggestive look before heading out. “Those two better not snitch or I’ll cut off their shrimps.” He nodded, just a little intimidated by the threat.

He got out his backpack and handed you the comic. “I’m still surprised I uh... I never knew you were into this stuff.” His breath hitched in his throat when your finger brushed over his as you took it from him. You flipped through it, keeping your eyes on the pages.

“Yeah, well... There’s a lot you don’t know about me, as much as I’m sure you guys love to assume.” You realized you hadn’t even told him your name, so you looked up at him and held out your hand, introducing yourself. You know, out of courtesy. 

“I-I know your name, but uhm... I’m Dave.” Your hand felt so soft, your beautifully manicured fingers being a real juxtaposition to his. His hand was much bigger and rougher than yours. You wondered why his hand was so calloused anyways... He didn’t look like he did many sports.

“Wait... Your name isn’t Lizewski?” You chuckled. “Christ, my bad... I always thought that was just your first name.” Your feeling of guilt for the boy before you flared up a bit again. He was being really nice to you, offering you something personal of his that he probably spent a pretty penny on. And you didn’t even know his actual name before. No wonder some people thought you were a bit of a bitch, you thought to yourself. 

“Hey, uhm... I know you got a bunch of these, and my dad would kill me if he knew I was reading them. He hates vigilantes, and he thinks reading comics will get me into the whole thing. Stupid, I know, but... He takes it surprisingly seriously.” You put the comic away carefully. “So I have a proposition for you.”

His eyebrows rose a little. A proposition, alright. No big deal. Could be literally anything though. 

“Come to my house this Saturday, bring a bunch of these, and I’ll tell my dad you’re coming to tutor me for physics or something.” You tilted your head a little, your locks falling gently over your shoulders. “I’ll pay you. Money’s not a problem. It’ll be like I’m renting them from you.”

He thought for a second, but in all honesty... How was this not a total win/win situation? He got to be in a pretty girl’s room, read comics with her, talk about them and make money. What kind of idiot would say no to that? “Yeah! Sounds good to me, uh... What do you want me to...” His words trailed off as you pulled out a pen and reached for his hand, writing a string of numbers on the back of it. 

“I’ll text you the address, and which series I like. I’ll let you do the picking. Oh, and Dave?”

“Y-Yeah?” He felt like his heart was going to beat right out of his chest. This is the closest you’ve ever stood to him. 

Your grip on his hand tightens, and you look up at him with a death stare. “Not a word to anyone about this.” You followed with a cutesy smile. “Alrighty?” You let go of his hand and put your stuff away before pulling out your car keys. 

Dave stands frozen in place, a faint blush already spread across his cheeks. He swore you were going to be the death of him. He looked down for a second and realized that what you wrote down wasn’t just some random numbers. It was your phone number. It all just suddenly felt very real to him, he’d never gotten a girl’s number before. And you were just about the last person he’d expect it from too.

You got in your car and turned on your engine. “See ya on Saturday, Lizewski! Don’t be late or I’ll kill you!” You smile, before driving off at a totally normal and acceptable speed. 

He gave a nervous wave before he looked back down at his hand. There was a little heart scribbled behind the phone number. It probably meant nothing.

But boy did it make his heart flutter. 

[morgana-larkin]

Hey,your fics are amazing, just binged read the oneshots and can't wait for the next chapter of 'worth it'.

But here's a small prompt, maybe mel and r is not close,r is an 8th grade teacher like Jacob but rarely even stops by the break room. She's only friends with him, Mel thought maybe r doesn't wanna be friends with the elementary staff so she let her be. Then one day when Mel is doing groceries, she bumps with r, realizing she goes to the same day and same store when doing groceries. They greet each other politely when they cross paths but Mel thinks it's ridiculous how they see each other on a grocery store but not in the very place of their employ where they work together. Then after like months of that, Mel and r cross paths again as usual, and was like 'hey kid,how come we see each other here and not in school'

Hey, thank you for the prompt, I thought the idea was super cute ☺️. I’m glad you’re liking my one shots enough to binge all of them! That comment made me smile, and the next chapter of ‘Worth It’ will be out soon, possibly tomorrow. I would have had this out this morning but I kept changing the beginning because nothing fit. Anyway, here’s the story, it’s short and sweet. Not edited in the slightest as always. Hope you like it!

On another note, I have 2 prompts that I’ll be working on after I finish the chapter of Worth It. So if you sent me a prompt yesterday, don’t worry, I’ll be working on it.

Grocery Store Rendezvous

Warnings: none

Words: 1.5k

« Hey y/n! Are you going to stay and chat with us today? » Jacob says as you enter the break room. You only enter the break room to get coffee but then you always leave right after. You look and see Melissa looking at you, eyeing you curiously.

« Nope, just came to get coffee. I got to grade some tests today, especially with report cards coming up. » you say to him.

« You know one day you’re going to come in here and stay. » Jacob says, teasing you a bit.

« Maybe, but that day is not today. » You say , pouring the coffee in your mug then you go to leave.

« When that day comes, I’ll take a picture. » he tells you and you smirk.

« That doesn’t make me want to stay even more. » you tell him and give him a little salute on the way out.

The truth is you don’t stay because of Melissa. She scares you but in the best way. From the first day you started working here a year ago, you were actually stunned by her beauty.

You don’t see her much though since you’re an 8th grade teacher and teach on the second floor. You became friends with Jacob since you work closely with him but you never had a reason to speak to Melissa. You were also incredibly shy so you just admire her from a distance and when you go to get your coffee in the morning and at lunch.

It was Saturday at noon and you parked in the parking lot of the grocery store you go to every Saturday. You walk in, get a cart and start going through your list.

You were turning into the spice aisle when you bump into another cart.

« Oh sorry, I didn’t… » your sentence goes unfinished as you see the person you bumped into. It was Melissa.

« Oh hi y/n, funny running into you here. » she says.

« Well actually I come here every Saturday at this time. » You tell her.

« Oh really? So do I. I wonder why we haven’t seen each other before. » she says to you.

« Well it’s a big store so we could have been on opposite sides of the store. » you with a small chuckle. « Well I gotta go finish my shopping, I’ll see you around Melissa. » you tell her with a nod.

« Alright see ya y/n. » And you go and continue your shopping.

You continue your shopping, but not even 5 minutes later, you run into her again when you go to get some chocolate milk and she’s getting some cheese.

« Y/n? We haven’t seen each other once for months, and now twice in the same day? » she says in disbelief.

« Ya I guess so, how ironic. » you say as you grab some chocolate milk.

« Chocolate milk? Really? » she says and quirks an eyebrow.

« Don’t diss it the chocolate milk. It’s good. » You tell her and she puts her hands up a bit in surrender and you laugh.

You two go in separate directions until you’re checking out and run into each other at the same cash.

« Wow, we’re 3 for 3. » Melissa jokes.

« I guess so. » You say.

You both go home after that. You drove home smiling that day, you got to speak to Melissa, multiple times.

On Monday at school, you do nothing differently. You still only go to the break room to get your coffee then leave. The one small difference is you blush a bit when you pass by Melissa. You don’t know it but Melissa noticed the blush and smiled a little when your back was turned.

The next Saturday you two run into each other again, and Melissa wonders why she sees and talks to you more at a grocery store than at work.

Months go by and every Saturday you and Melissa keep running into each other, sometimes multiple times in one day. About 3 months of this happening, Melissa has had enough and decides to ask you the question that’s been bugging her.

« Hey kid, how come we see each other here and not at school? » she asks and you stare at her.

« I don’t know. I guess there’s not really a reason for us to talk to each other at school. » you reply sheepishly. The 2 of you walk down the aisle while talking.

« You don’t need a reason, you can just say hi. »

« I thought you were the type of person who didn’t like people just saying hi to you. » You counter.

« Ok fair point, but I wouldn’t mind if you did it. »

« Why am I different? »

« Do you see me talking to other coworkers outside of work? »

« Ok first of all, we don’t even talk in school. And 2, idk who you talk to at all. » you tell her.

« Why don’t we start talking in school? » she asks and you freeze.

« Why? »

« Because we don’t talk in school like you said, so let’s change that. » she points out. And only then do you realise the hole you dug yourself.

« Uh, I don’t think that’s a good idea Melissa. »

« Why? Are you embarrassed to be seen with me? » she asks and stops walking and crosses her arms.

« What? No that’s not it at all. » You say, you really don’t want to admit your feelings for her.

« Then what is it? » she pushes.

« it’s not important. » you say, hoping that will put an end to the conversation. It did not.

« It’s important to me! » Melissa says, getting annoyed.

« Why? »

« How about you answer the question I asked first. Why don’t you want to talk to me in school!?! »

« Because you scare me! » You spill out, and you can tell by the hurt look on her face that you just have to say it. « I like you and that scares me. And I don’t mean friendship like, I mean romantic like. » You tell her and her hurt expression turns to a happy one.

« I like you too. » she says. « Romantic like. » she adds and you can’t believe your luck. For once, the woman you like, likes you back. You two finish your grocery shopping together and you check out together as well.

« Come over to my place. » she says to you and you stare wide eyed, Melissa never invites anyone to her place.

« Ok, sure, when? » you ask and she smiles.

« Are you free right now? »

« Well I’ve actually got a couple of frozen groceries to bring home but after that, ya. » You say and she smiles.

« Give me your phone. »

« What? » you say confused.

« Give me your phone so I can add my number so I can send my address. » she says and you immediately give her your phone. She adds herself and you smile at the nickname she gave herself ‘Mel 👩🏻‍🦰👑’

« R u trying to say that you’re a ginger queen? » You snort.

« Maybe. » she flips her hair and you laugh.

You get in your cars and you drive home. As soon as you get home you text her.

You: this is y/n , I just got home, send me your address, your highness.

Mel 👩🏻‍🦰👑: your highness? I like that. Here’s my address

Mel 👩🏻‍🦰👑: *sends address*

You: I’ll be there in 20 minutes, your highness

20 minutes later you knock on her front door. She answers it and immediately welcomes you in. As soon as you walk in, she puts her lips on yours. You kiss her back and she smiles into the kiss.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for awhile.” She says and you smile at her.

“So have I.” You say and you lean in to kiss her again.

On Monday morning you come into the break room to get your morning coffee as usual. This time, instead of leaving, you sit next to Melissa and she smiles at you. Melissa gets a questioning look from Barb and you get a questioning look from the trio. You then hear the click of a phone camera and you look to see Jacob taking a picture.

“I told you I’d take a picture.” He says and you smile. At this point you don’t care, you got Melissa.

Melissa stands up to go put something in the garbage and gives you a kiss on your lips, getting gasps from everyone. You smile and blush and she has a smirk on her face. After thinking that you wanted nothing to do with her and the rest of the group, it turns out you were avoiding her because you liked her. She smiles at that thought as she sits back down next to you, and she pulls your chair closer to her.

Taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta

@imaginesmultifandoms

@idonothingalldays-blog

@sexysapphicshopowner

@dvrkhcld

If you want to be added then let me know!

[sunflowerharrington]

I’m finally sending you my request!

I would probably want a fluffy to smutty Eddie x plus size reader fic. Based on “Do I wanna know?” By Arctic Monkeys.

Like her and Eddie are bffs and she has had a crush on him for what feels like forever, they tease each other and stuff but he never picks up the hints. The whole gang goes to the lake for a day and the reader is super nervous to show up in her swimsuit because she’s bigger and doesn’t want Eddie to think she’s gross. When he sees her he realizes the feelings he’s had for a very long time. They eventually go back to his place to change and they both end up confessing to each other. That’s just my idea but you can change it however you want to fit the song better if you like. 💕

Do I Wanna Know If This Feeling Flows Both Ways? - EM X PlusSize!GN!Reader

pairing: eddie munson x plus-size!gn!reader.

warnings: male masturbation, perv!eddie, friends to lovers, p in v sex, eddie’s wild thoughts, eddie’s pov, obsessions, borderline yandere!eddie, jealousy, anger, low self esteem, body issues, lack of self love, fluff and smut, mention of heather holloway and billy hargrove’s deaths, reader is wearing a bathing suit but this can be read as swim shorts too if you like, slight breeding kink (i think that’s it).

notes: i tried my best, babes, i really did. i don’t feel as though this is the best representation because i myself am not plus sized, so if this is bad i’m sorry, i just wanted to write this for you. poc friendly also :) enjoy! if you want you can listen to ‘do i wanna know’ by arctic monkeys!

side note: not proofread or edited, sorry if there’s spelling or grammar mistakes :( also, i couldn’t help myself from switching the pov and the crush to eddie, i hope you still like it baby!

word count: 1541

taglist: @jonathansonlysweetheart @steveslittlesunflower @thisishellfire @friendly-neighborhood-ghoul @hellfirehaley @fxllfaiiry @fleurfairie @liviawritesthings @myobmaya @thefreakofhawkins86 @lxvecakes @creneal @corrodedhawkins @wzrlds @sympathyforher @quickiesgirl @eddiebillysteve @taecube @eddies-bat (i hope i got everyone!) dm comment or ask me to be added or taken off for future updates! 🖤

There’s this story that brings you on the journey of young love. It’s like stepping out from a dark place and into the sun on a hot summer’s day, where the light is so bright and hot that your eyes ache and you’re blinded, where you panic, afraid you’ll never see the sun again. That’s what it was like when Eddie Munson fell in love. And he would always see the sun, as you were his sun, and he’d never let you go as long as you both lived.

He wanted you forever, he wanted to be yours forever. Whether that was as a friend, a best friend, or something more, he didn’t really mind. He just wanted you to stay in his life. Which was why on the day before you left for your vacation to California that you were going on with Chrissy, Robin, Nancy, Max, Erica and El, Eddie decided to ask the gang to meet him down by Lover’s Lake for a cool off from the hot sun. And everyone showed up, with Dustin complaining the entire time about the heat, with Steve telling him to stop whining.

Eddie loved their brotherly relationship, and he also loved the way Steve took in Max as one of his own without any questions, filling the big brother spot she never had. Eddie aspired to have that kind of relationship with someone, which is why he jumped at his first chance, taking Will under his wing, showing him the ins and outs of D&D and highschool romances—even though Eddie was never in a relationship before. But he swore by the fact that single people give better relationship advice than those in relationships… And he also helped Will figure out his feelings for Mike, so it was heartwarming to see that after Will confessed, Mike didn’t run away, he didn’t pull away. In fact, they got even closer.

Eddie wanted to be that close with you. And this “pool party” was the perfect way to do so. He even thought about fake-drowning so you’d save him, knowing you worked as a lifeguard at the swimming pool after Heather Holloway and Billy Hargrove went missing… Or so he thought. But Dustin and the others hadn’t told him the ins and outs of the Starcourt Tragedy just yet. They didn’t need to ruin his summer even more than you already had. You’d ruined him. You’d ruined Edward Wayne Munson, and you didn’t even know it. Standing on the wooden pathway around the edge of the lake next to Chrissy, ready to jump in, in your red lifeguard bathing suit—his favorite color, the reason why he hung out at the pool, just to see you in it, with your black bathing suit cover-up and your black and white flip flops—that he loved a lot.

But not as much as he loved you. Oh, he loved you so much. He’d do anything for you, including things from moving mountains to human sacrifice. You were his goddess, sent down from heaven to guide him through his highschool years, helping him to finally graduate in the summer of ‘86, and now helping him to finish his mechanics apprenticeship so he could get a job at the local garage. He hoped your car would break down a lot so he could fix it for you and impress you with his skilled fingers—while fixing your car, obviously, get your mind out of the gutter—instead of his swimming skills, or lack thereof.

He lay on his stomach next to Lucas, who’d been writing something down in a notebook, humming a Kate Bush song to himself. It sounded like Babooshka, and he had Max’s headphones on, so it must have been. Lucas was drawing a love heart with his and Max’s initials inside, and there was a poem beneath. As Eddie read the poem, his thoughts drifted back to you, the sound of your giggles filling his ears as Nancy splashed water at you and Steve playfully pulled you under the water with his arms�� around… your… waist…

Fuck. No, this could not be happening. Eddie needed to be the one doing that. He needed to be the one with his hands around your waist, with his legs tangled with yours, with his hands around your— Woah, slow down there buddy.

Eddie rolled his eyes, he’d have to somehow slip away to sort out his growing erection somehow. Do you see what you do to him? He excused himself to the bathroom, stalking away from the group, into Reefer Rick’s cabin and into one of the rooms furthest away from where the group were situated. He sighed contentedly, working his balled fist over the shaft of his throbbing cock, the sensations of his hand squeezing over the sensitive nerves in his tip sending shivers of pleasure up his spine.

From where he was standing he had a clear view of you outside the window, the bathing suit hugging your full hips and your thick thighs he’d love to have his face between. He’d do anything for it. A small whimper left his throat as he fucked his fist faster, cursing your name under his breath, spreading his precum over the length of his dick.

“Fuck,” he mumbled under his breath, his hips bucking against his hand, whining and moaning as he kept his wide eyes full of undeniable lust on you. “Love fucking this pretty pussy, baby. My pretty pussy—fuck, baby, you’re so fucking tight, oh my God! Wanna have sex with you for real, sweetheart. Gonna cum in you again and again until you’re so full and round you look pregnant, baby—shit, fucking shit, oh shit— gonna- gonna make you mine.”

Eddie’s labored breathing turned into lewd gasps as his wrist flicking sped up, fucking himself through his high, his eyes squeezing shut, though the image of you bent over to pick up a bottle of sunscreen was still plastered in his mind. He wanted that image tatted on the inside of his eyelids.

His mouth dropped open and his thighs tensed, his chest rising and falling rapidly at the same time as his heavy breathing. One, two, three strokes until he let out a loud cry of your name, alerting you unbeknownst to him. He didn’t hear the door flinging open behind him as he came, thick ropes of cum dripping down his hand.

“Fuck, princess,” he chuckled. “Look at what your pretty ass made me do.”

He barely felt the arms wrapping around his waist until somebody rested their head against his back, against the area between his shoulder blades. His breath hitched in his chest when he recognized the color of nail polish you were wearing outside. You knew he only called you his princess, his sweetheart, his.

“Hi, Eds,” you murmured, your voice muffled against his skin, running your fingertips up and down his stomach, not realizing what had just happened, or just choosing to ignore it. “Had to come in for some shade, it’s too hot outside.”

“That’s because you were outside sweetheart. You’re gonna cause global warming,” he said, turning around after he’d shoved his softened dick back into his swim shorts, knowing that you hadn’t seen it because if you had, he knew his sweetheart would be freaking out. And he didn’t want that.

He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and pulled you close, discreetly sniffing your hair as he kissed the top of your forehead by your hairline. One thing Eddie didn’t know was how long it took Chrissy and Robin to convince you to go to the lake, practically dragging you out of your house and into Steve’s car. They promised nobody would think anything different of you, but that was so easy for them to say. Itty bitty bodies and tiny waists, but that’s not what Eddie liked. No, no. He loved your body the most.

He wanted to worship you as if you were a Goddess. Which you were, especially to him. He wanted to squeeze and kiss every inch of your body, and he wanted to suck hickeys into those deliciously curvy hips of yours and your neck. Oh, he wanted to cover your neck in hickeys, a few in the shape of an ‘E’ on the right side of your neck, and an ‘M’ on the left side of your neck. He wanted to mark you as his. And he wanted to do it now.

So that’s how he found himself on top of you as you whined beneath him, his shirt covering your body as he made sweet love to you, whispering words of affection to you as he chased both of your highs. He confessed he loved you as he came, seeing stars and angels dancing and fluttering around in his mind as thick ropes of cum landed on your breasts and stomach, seeping into his Black Sabbath shirt, joking that he’d never wash his sheets again after your cum began seeping into the sheets and the mattress.

You thought he was kidding, but he wasn’t, as you saw when you landed on the mattress after jumping back into the overworld after defeating Vecna in the Upside Down with your Eddie by your side.

feedback, likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated! they let me know that you want me to keep writing!

[skyeet-the-writer]

The Love Among Us

Chapter 1-- I’d Never Snitch On Daddy

so i haven’t seen many corpse husband x reader stories on here, so i decided to upload one myself. i’ve been watching jacksepticeye’s among us videos and when i heard corpse talk for the first time, i was like, “hol up” and now i’ve been obsessed with him. also, go stream his music on spotify, it’s amazing. enjoy! x. 

 corpse husband x female!reader

summary: while playing among us, y/n watches corpse kill felix in o2. when his body is reported, however, she doesn’t tell who killed him. 

 word count: ~3.6k

warnings: swearing, mentions of death (not real death), mentions of murder (not real murder)

EDIT: before i wrote this and after i published it, i did not know that corpse did not like to be referred to as “daddy”. had i known this, i would have not even thought of posting this. and since i know now, i won’t refer to him as such in the future. thank you. (10/19/2020)

EDIT 2: this is the first part to my corpse x reader series. i will be adding chapters as we go!

next>

4 rounds before the incident

“I was in coms with PJ!” Sean exclaims. 

“He is doing the liar voice!” Felix shouts with a laugh. 

“I’m not,” Sean tries to say, but everyone talks over him and the voting time ends. Everyone left alive, though it was only four people, had all voted for him and he yells at them as he gets ejected. 

stinky was not the imposter

2 imposters remain

The round ends and everyone unmutes themselves. 

“Lizzie, you saw Felix kill me and you did nothing!” Roomie yells as soon as the round ends and the imposters are revealed. 

“Yeah, because I was the other imposter.”

“Oh. Okay, well that makes sense.”

Everyone laughs and Ken starts the round again. 

“Wait, can I invite y/n to play? She’s doing her twenty-four-hour stream and she just finished playing Monopoly with Mark, Bob, and Wade,” says Lizzie, looking down at her phone as they all appear back in the waiting room. 

“Yes,” Corpse blurts out and there are a few laughs and chuckles. 

“You were quick to answer, Corpse,” Sean teases. 

“Shut up,” Corpse mumbles and there are even more laughs. 

Lizzie smiles and taps into her phone. “I’m gonna invite her.”

~

“I can’t believe that you actually made that deal, y/n,” Wade is telling you after ending the second round of Monopoly that you’ve played with them. 

You smile and cross your legs on your chair. “Look, I was going bankrupt and it seemed good at the time. Besides, Mark was going to win anyway, he owned half of the board.” Your phone buzzes beside you on your desk and you pick it up. “Lizzie texted me.” There’s a sound effect that plays in your headset and you look up at your screen and smile. “Thanks to _lorieplays _for donating a hundred dollars, that means a lot. Thank you so much.”

“Do you want to play another round?” Marks asks. 

You shake your head, reading the text from your friend in England. “No, I don’t want to lose to you again.” You laugh. “Nah, Lizzie wants me to play Among Us with her and a few others. It was fun playing with you guys.”

“It was even though you took all of my money,” Bob snaps. 

You laugh. “Yeah, yeah. See you guys later.”

“Bye,” says Mark.

“See y--” Wade begins but you cut him off when you disconnect from the call. 

“Oops.” You put a hand over your mouth and laugh. “Sorry, Wade. Okay.” You straighten up and glance over everything, making sure it’s all working properly. “I have to pee and I think my roommate ordered pizza, so we’ll be back after this short break. Enjoy this live feed of my pet rats.” You giggle and switch the stream over to a view of your two rats in their cage where you have a camera set up. You take your headset off and head out of your recording room. 

Every two months, you have a twenty-four-hour livestream where you play games with your friends from all around the world. Despite being only twenty-five, your Youtube channel had grown exponentially in the past three years and you’ve had the chance to meet lots of other Youtubers like Markiplier, PewDiePie, and your close friend, LDShadowLady. 

Currently, you’re on hour twenty of twenty-four and you’re beginning to feel the effects of not sleeping for a whole day. You had been drinking coffee and energy drinks for the past four hours and that seemed to perk you up for two hours max. But your roommate had ordered pizza and that would hopefully wake you up. 

After going to the bathroom and grabbing an entire box of pizza, you return to your recording room and sit down. You put your headset back on and eat a slice of pizza before switching the views back to you. “And we’re back. I hope you guys enjoyed my rats because I don’t. They keep me up at night.”

You read a comment while loading up Among Us and laugh. “No, they’re not dead. They’re sleeping. They do that a lot when they’re not fighting.” 

When you finally get into the game and entire the code, you spawn in. You also quickly join the Discord chat and wince when nearly ten voices hit you at once. 

“y/n!” exclaims Lizzie and the other voices die down for a moment before rising to greet you. 

You wince again but laugh. “Jesus, you guys are loud. Hey, Lizzie.” You move your character to the customize tab and go to try and switch your color. But then you frown and realize that you’re stuck with being dark blue. “Damn, I wanted to be white.”

“Do you want to switch?” Corpse asks. 

Your eyes widen you your stomach flips. You hadn’t noticed Corpse was in this game. Immediately, your chat became flooded with keyboard smashing and lots of “omg my shipp” and “y/n rlly said ‘anna oop-’” 

“Uh, yeah, if you don’t mind,” you manage to stutter out and take a bite of pizza as Corpse’s player comes over and the white option becomes available. You select it and also select the goggles in the hats menu. 

“How’s your stream going?” asks Sean. 

You shrug. “Pretty good. I’m super tired, though. I literally almost fell asleep while playing Monopoly with Mark, Wade, and Bob.”

“You went to college, right?” You’re pretty sure that’s Roomie. 

“Yep,” you affirm with a nod even though they can’t see you. “You’d think that those all-nighters writing papers and studying for finals would make me able to do this.”

There’s a laugh in the group and the round starts.

3 rounds before the incident

You scratch your eyebrow and sigh in relief when you’re the crewmate. You mute yourself and slide up in your chair. 

“I like being the crewmate,” you say, heading towards admin as a habit. “It’s a lot less stressful than being imposter.”

After doing your tasks in admin and fueling the engines, you stumble across a dead body in the lower engine and a vent closing. 

“Oh,” you say, and press the report button. You unmute yourself and begin with, “So I saw a vent close but I didn’t see who went in.”

“Who died?” asks Lizzie. 

“Felix,” says Sean. 

You smirk. “It’s always yellow that dies first.”

“Where was the body?” Ken asks. 

“Lower engine,” you reply. 

“I was in medbay with Corpse doing the scan so it wasn’t him,” PJ says and Corpse makes a noise of confirmation. 

This makes your cheeks heat up and you smack a hand over your mouth. Your chat explodes again but you decide to ignore it. 

“And I was doing wires in cafeteria,” Lizzie says. 

“Sean, where were you?” 

“I was in reactor doing the simon says thing,” he answers. 

You sigh. “I hate that one. What about you, Ken?”

“I was with Roomie in electrical doing the power thing. You know, the one where you have to divert it somewhere else.”

“So do we skip then?” asks Lizzie. 

“No one is super sus, so I’m going to skip,” you answer. 

When no one is ejected, you mute yourself again. “I dunno why, but Sean seems pretty sus. Because I didn’t see him on the way down from upper engine. But I guess he could have gotten there in time.” You shrug and run over to the trash chute in the cafeteria. “RIP to Felix, though.”

After doing the trash there, you head down to storage, running into Corpse doing the wires in there. You wait there to clear him and once you do, you run a few circles around him to get his attention and he follows you over to the trash in storage and watches you do that. After that, the two of you head over to electric together and do wires there. 

Suddenly, there’s a body reported and you unmute yourself. 

“Sean just killed Lizzie in front of me!” exclaims PJ. 

“PJ killed Lizzie,” Sean retorts, flipping the blame. “I watched it, he didn’t realize I was there and murdered her.”

“I watched PJ do the scan in medbay, he’s cleared,” Corpse says and you find yourself smiling for no reason. “Sean, you killed Lizzie.”

“I knew he was sus,” you say, grabbing another piece of pizza. You look at the box and your eyes widen. Had you really already eaten half of it?

“Wait wait, how am I sus?” Sean asks. 

You take a moment to swallow. “Because when I was doing fuel earlier, I was running down from upper engine and didn’t see you in reactor. Sure, maybe you could have gotten there earlier, but it was super weird.” 

The discussion time ends and PJ immediately goes to vote for Sean as well as you, Corpse, and everyone else still alive. Sean ends up getting ejected. 

stinky was an imposter 

1 imposter remains

“You’re such a detective, y/n,” Sean says when he gets ejected. 

You laugh. “I just play this game too much.” You then mute yourself and smile. “I am a genius.” 

You end up finishing your tasks quickly after that and then stand in the cafeteria and eat another piece of pizza and read some of the chat. 

“’ What am I going to do after this?’ I don’t know. I might play some Minecraft. Should I have a poll on Twitter? I’m stuck between public Among Us games, Minecraft, and taking random quizzes on Buzzfeed.” You smile and hear another sound effect and something pops up on the screen. “Thank you to coochie man for donating a hundred dollars, that means a lot.” You laugh at their name. “I love your name, by the way.” 

There’s some rattling in the cage behind you and you turn around to see one of your rats drinking water. You turn back to the chat and read another comment. “’ Do you have a crush on Corpse?’” You blush and smile, biting your lip. “I mean, his voice is hot. I’ve never met him since he lives in San Diego and I live in h/t, but yeah, I guess I do. I’ve been listening to his music for the past few days and it’s really good, you guys should go check it out.”

You look up and unmute yourself when a body is reported. “Who died?” you ask. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Are you already done with your tasks, y/n?” Corpse asks. 

God, even the way he says your name is making you blush. “Yeah, I get them done quick.”

“She does that,” says Lizzie, “She always gets her tasks done quick.”

“Ken is dead by the way,” says Roomie and your snort, smacking a hand over your mouth. “I found him in the hallway by navigation. Where was everyone else?”

“I was in cafeteria doing nothing,” you say, leaning back in your chair and spinning around just a little. “I think I saw PJ downloading while I was in there, but I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Yeah, I was downloading,” says Ken. 

After more discussion, Corpse points out that Jaiden had been following him and it looked like she had been faking tasks. 

“No I haven’t,” she says. 

“That sounds like something the imposter would say,” you hum with a smirk. “That’s pretty sus, Jaiden.”

Everyone else agrees and you all end up voting Jaiden out. 

jaiden was the imposter

0 imposters remain

You cheer as the round ends and a blue victory screen pops up for the crewmates. “Good game, guys,” you say and play again, waiting for the host. 

~

1 round before the incident 

“Oh my god, I’m imposter again?” you groan and sigh when you spawn back in. “I was just imposter, I don’t want to be it again. I’m so bad at it,”

After another short round of you and Felix losing to the crewmates, you all agreed to play two more rounds before Sean had to leave. So you move your character to admin where PJ is and fake the card swipe before moving over to the admin security thing where you could see who was around where. Luckily, no one appeared to be near admin, so you quickly kill PJ and escape through the vent and come out through medbay. 

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god,” you whisper over and over, running down to storage. “That was clean.” You fake getting fuel and go back up to the upper engine. 

When PJ’s body is reported, you see that your fellow imposter, Sean, had reported it. You stay silent for most of the round and only say that you were in the fuel area when it was reported. 

“Yeah, I saw her run past electrical earlier,” Corpse says. You blush and glance at your exploding chat and shake your head. 

After everyone skips the round, you mute yourself once more and head towards navigation. “I hate this.” You drag the last syllable and watch Lizzie enter the room. You wait a moment before walking towards her and killing her, jumping into one of the vents. You let out a sigh and flex your fingers. “I’m so stressed.” You exit out of the vent into shields and your heart stops when you see someone else in there but you realize that it’s the other imposter, Sean, and you relax. 

You run past him and go to the trash compartments and pretend to unload those. And that’s how the rest of the round goes. You kill someone, someone reports it and you vote someone off. Eventually, you and Sean do a double kill and end up winning the round.

You unmute yourself. 

“Let’s go!” Sean exclaims and you smile. 

“I can’t believe you killed me, y/n!” shouts Lizzie. “I thought we were friends.”

You laugh. “There are no friends in this game. I’m not loyal to anyone in this game. You could be my best friend and I would fucking murder you.”

“That’s cold,” says Roomie as everyone else spawns back in. 

“Yeah,” you nod. 

“Wait, PJ disconnected,” says Sean, and you all end up waiting for him to rejoin. 

In that time, you look at your chat and say, “Hey, do you guys have any questions for who I’m playing with. I’m asking you, chat.”

“I swear if someone asks about my hands, I’m leaving,” Corpse says and everyone laughs. 

You laugh louder when you read a comment and read it aloud, “_Ironlady _says that you should be a hand model, Corpse.”

“Okay, I’m leaving,” you hear Corpse say over everyone laughing. 

“No, stay!” you exclaim, trying not to laugh. “C’mon, don’t leave.”

He sighs deeply and your brain goes fuzzy. “Fine. I’ll stay for you.”

You beam and your tummy turns. You ignore the whistles and remarks from everyone else and stand beside Corpse. You suddenly wish that the little bean characters could hold hands. 

When PJ joins the server again, Ken starts the round and you cross your fingers, hoping to get crewmate. 

0 rounds before the incident

You mute yourself and sigh when you’re a crewmate. “Thank god.” You let out a breath and go over to admin with everyone else. You swipe your card and go to the cafeteria to do some wires there. 

The game turns out to be rather uneventful. A few people die and two people are voted off before the game gets truly interesting. And that happens when you walk in on Corpse and Felix. 

“I’ve had this song stuck in my head for days,” you’re saying, walking from electrical over to O2. “And I can’t get it out of my head. Maybe singing it will help.” You hum the first part. “Don't go in there, you'll become one. Freaky creatures, monster party. Eyes of yellow, scales and feathers, tails in tethers. Turn the lights off. Bend the nightmare, you control it. Artful dodger, easy does it. Shut the closet, get under the covers. Snakes and lovers. Turn the lights off.” You do a little dance for a moment and continue hum the song, glancing at the chat as you go towards O2 after doing wires in storage. 

“Like, I know the song, it’s just been stuck in my head,” you explain. “And it kind of annoys me--”

But you stop as you enter O2 and watch Corpse murder Felix. Neither one of you move and you don’t know what to do. “Uhhh.” 

Then, without thinking, you turn straight around and make your way away from the scene of the murder. “I didn’t see anything!” you shout to no one. “I suddenly can’t see who murdered Felix.” You smack a hand over your mouth and stand in the middle of a hallway. “Oh my god, what do I do? I don’t want to snitch on Corpse, he’s hot.” You scratch the back of your neck and shrug, continuing on to reactor. “I didn’t see anything.”

You’re in the middle of doing the simon says in reactor when Felix’s body is reported. You unmute yourself and fidget with the sleeve of your hoodie. You know exactly who killed Felix. 

“--was in O2,” says Jaiden and you focus back into the conversation. “And I didn’t see anyone around.”

“I saw you heading that way, y/n, but I know it wasn’t you because I saw you do the trash in storage.”

You look at the screen when Sean talks to you and you chew your lip. “I know who killed Felix.”

“Who?” asks almost everyone at the same time. 

You close your eyes and swallow. It’s just a game, why are you taking this so seriously? Suddenly, a song lyric pops into your head and your stomach flips. You imagine yourself saying it and no one knows who you mean except for him. 

You open your eyes. “I’d never snitch on daddy.”

There’s a laugh in the chat and you blush fiercely, your livestream chat blowing up once again.

“I think we know who it is, then,” says Sean, laughing. 

“Yeah,” agrees Lizzie and your eyes widen. 

“Wait, what?” you ask, watching everyone vote almost as soon as the discussion time ends. “Wait, hang on, who--”

“We know who you’re talking about, y/n,” PJ tells you. 

You vote for yourself and your brain goes blank as you see that everyone voted for Corpse. He even voted for himself. They knew. They all _knew _about your feelings for Corpse. 

The round ends with Corpse being voted out and the crewmates win. There’s some talking, but you stay on the victory screen. You’re trying to decide if your mad or embarrassed or both. 

“I didn’t know you’d say that, y/n,” Corpse says, effectively breaking you out of your trance. “I thought you were gonna snitch on me.”

“You heard her,” teases Lizzie and you can tell she’s grinning. “She’d never snitch on you, Corpse.”

He laughs and you feel something in a certain place. “Oh my god, I’m gonna die of embarrassment.” You put your face in your hands, listening to your friends tease you in the chat. You suddenly want to jump out your window and run into traffic. 

“Don’t die,” comes Corpse’s voice through the onslaught of teasing. “I’ll be sad.”

“Fuck!” you shout and slam your hand on your desk, shaking your equipment and scaring your rats. “I’m so sorry, Corpse, that was really weird, I--”

“Stop.” He interrupts you and the chat goes silent and you look up at the screen even though you can’t see him. “It’s okay. It was funny.”

Your eyes widen and then narrow. Funny? He thought what you said was funny? How could he think it was funny?

But then he speaks again and he sounds oddly flustered. “Uh, I gotta go. Um, it was fun playing with you guys. Bye, y/n.”

“Bye Cor--” but then he disconnects and you’re left talking to no one. “--pse.”

There’s a long moment of silence until Felix breaks it. “I can’t believe you just watched me die and didn’t do anything about it.”

There are some laughs and you smile faintly, rejoining the game. “Yeah, uh, sorry about that.”

“Are you okay, y/n?” asks Lizzie. 

You blush and swallow. “I don’t know. God, I’m so weird.” You run a hand through your hair and adjust your headphones

“No, you’re not,” Roomie assures you. “He has a crush on you, too.”

Your eyes widen and you scoot up in your chair. “He does?”

“I mean, he called you pretty once during a game and said that he watches your videos a lot, so maybe.”

You groan and sink in your chair. “I’m gonna go, I need to run into traffic now.”

A few people laugh or chuckle and Lizzie asks you if you’re actually going to leave. 

“Yeah,” you tell her. “But not to run into traffic. I’m going to go play Minecraft to soothe myself.”

“Aw.” You can practically hear her frown. “Okay. Bye, y/n.”

“Good luck with your stream,” Ken tells you. 

You grin. “Okay, thanks, bye.”

When you exit the game and leave the chat, you scream. You actually scream and it’s loud. Your roommate even knocks on your door, asking if you’re okay. 

You look at them and nod. “Yeah, totally fine. Probably about to have a mental breakdown, but I’m fine.”

“Okay,” they say and lean on the doorframe. “But I’m not cutting bangs for you again.”

You laugh and nod. “Yeah, okay, fine.” They leave and you turn back to your stream, feeling like you’re about to cry. Corpse knows you have a crush on him. And it seems like he has one on you as well, but now you’re embarrassed because you called him ‘daddy’ on stream.

You rub your eyes. “Well, now I know what’ll be streaming on Twitter tonight,” you tell the chat. 

[proserpina-magnus]

Can you do a fic where Sirius comforts you when your sad

Waves of Comfort (S.B)

Prompt: you fail a test and Sirius is the one to find you.

Reader: they/them (not specified)

Word count: 0.9 (I know.. it’s so short 😭)

Warning: somewhat hurt/comfort, smoking cigarettes, swearing, not edited, comment to add more.

Requests: somewhat closed.. Haven't decided yet.

A/N: This is super short and not a lot of comforting but oh well.. Sorry this took so long and I hope it’s at least somewhat good. Might rewrite it if I have the time.

You strolled through the hallways blankly, a slightly confused look on your face that dwelled your expression. You stared at the ground in front of you, chattering students coming from a blur of background noise. How could you have failed that charms test? You had studied for hours on end, you had perfected it, it was just a simple transfiguration charm; turn a shoe into a brush, a fucking brush, what blimey fool couldn’t do that? Apparently, you had been that blimey fool.

You turned down corners, not knowing where to go, you didn’t even have a destination. When you came back to your reality, you realized that you weren’t inside anymore. Hours ago you had stumbled from the castle to the docs, not many students were out at this fine hour. The sun was peeking from behind the grey clouds, stars appearing as a half crescent moon shined brighter up overhead.

You decided to watch the sun set, knees pulling to your chest as you cradled yourself. The wind blew against your ears, whistling as a storm was brewing. You had felt cold, fingers numbing but all that was on your mind was the pressure of the failed test. Was it even worth all the studying if the outcome was bullshit, was it worth all the time and energy, was it even worth it to become a certified wizard? Questioning thoughts kept appearing right after eachother, no matter how many books you read, none of these questions felt like they could be answered. What was even the point?

“______,” came a voice, calling out to you in the dark, you turned around. There was your point, your reason. You saw Sirius jog up, a somewhat concerned yet angry eyes watching you as he stood above you. “What are you doing all the way out here? You didn’t come to dinner, I was worried,”

“I was just thinking,” you shrugged, turning back to watch the water sway in the dimmed light. Sirius watched you with a frown, he came and sat beside you, his knees brushing against yours.

“You’ve been thinking a lot lately,” he said, eyeing you. You kept looking out towards the water, maybe if you were a part of the merpeople, you’d never have to worry about the stress of school. “Doesn’t everyone think often?” You asked, “I mean how do you even stop thinking?”

“I don’t know,” Sirius replied, looking out towards the water. “All I know is that it ain’t right for me to let you shiver out here,” he said, tugging off his coat as he slid it around your back, letting it hang off your shoulders. You smiled, holding the coat close to you.

“Thank you,” you whispered, he nodded. Usually Sirius was such a talker, but he knew you well enough that sometimes quiet was all you needed; you’d tell him what was really bothering you, and he’d reason with you.

You both stayed silent for a while, before you dug through Sirius's coat pocket and pulled out his cigs. You flipped the box open, taking one out for yourself as you plotted it against your lips, passing one out to Sirius.

You light the cig, a hand to cover the flame from the wind. You lit yours, Sirius leaning over as you did the same for him.

You exhaled out through your nose, sighing. “I failed my charms test,” you said, Sirius listened. He held the cig out, tapping it as the ash fell.

“I studied so hard, I perfected it, but when I got in there- everyone was watching me, I don’t know what happened, I just couldn’t do it,” you rambled, eyes concentrating on the dark lake.

“I’ve done it a hundred times, that should be enough. Why wasn't it enough?” You faltered, pushing the cig in your mouth as you took a deep inhale. Sirius had taken a long look at you, his mouth pressed in a thin line as he criticized what to say. You grew a bit irritated by the silence, turning your head as you stared at him. You wanted him to say something, and Sirius knew that.

“What happened? Was it a panic attack or just a random fluke?” He questioned, you shrug as you search your mind for an answer.

“I don’t know,” you simply state, finishing off the cig as you smush it into the dock.

Sirius nods, looking out towards the lake as it’s waves slam closer and closer to your feet. His eyes linger back to you, his arm extended as he wraps it around your back, pulling you close. You close your eyes, head resting against his shoulder. He leans over, his lips against your forehead as his hand rubs your arm. His hair tickles your cheek and you move closer to his arm, trying to get away from the feeling.

“I’d like to say we can stay here as long as you want, but it’s getting dark and chilly- and I want to go eat dinner with you,” Sirius says, pulling away as you almost begin to sulk before he stands up and offers his hand to you.

“You didn’t eat dinner?” You exclaimed, Sirius loved dinner. You took his hand, pulling yourself up as his arm went around your waist as he guided you back to the castle.

“Merlin no! I was too worried about you!” He says, though he did steal Peter's dessert. Your head rested back against his arm, walking each step with him.

“You’re so silly” you say, his hand moving from your back so you can hold onto it with yours. You wrap your arms around his singular one, clinging onto it for comfort.

“Only for you,” he says, you smile, the stress of the failed grade slipped from your mind as Sirius fills it with laughs and giggles.

—

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[bibbawrites]

Don’t Mention This To Anyone - Alive!Luke Patterson x Reader (SMUT)

Request: Hi can u do a luke x reader smut with an enemies to lovers storyline? Maybe they’re at a party and they’re playing truth or dare and luke and the reader get dared to play too hot to handle and later on at the party they get drunk and hook up? // can you do rough sex with luke?!! // Can u do a luke x reader enemies to lovers smut? //  Would you make a Luke and Y/N smut and just make it whatever you want but super smutty?

Word Count: 2163 words

Summary: Your best friend Julie invites you and Flynn to come over to hang out with her bandmates, and a game of too hot to handle ends up making you re-evaluate your relationship with Luke Patterson

Warnings: swearing, mention of underage drinking, unprotected sex, choking, praise kink, dirty talk, grinding/groping

A/N: hopefully this makes sense, i’m editing it half asleep lol  i’ve also put together a masterlist which you can find here anyways hope you enjoy :) 

You should have said no when Julie batted her eyes and asked you if you wanted to come hang out with her bandmates after school one Friday night. 

You should have said no when she used alcohol as a bribing tactic to get you to come. 

You should have made up an excuse not to go. 

Don’t get the wrong impression, you loved Alex and Reggie. The two boys had become close friends of yours since the day Julie first introduced them to you and Flynn. 

It was Luke Patterson that you had an issue with. The lead guitarist of Julie and the Phantoms and the lead pain in your ass since the minute you met. 

If you had said no to coming you wouldn’t have been in this situation. 

Staring down at the bottle on the floor after you drunkenly agreed to a game of Too Hot to Handle, watching as the bottle slowly stopped and pointed at the one person you were praying it wouldn’t. 

Luke fucking Patterson. 

“Oh fuck no.” You exclaimed loudly. Luke shook his head. 

“No way. Not doing it.” He said, his tone matching yours. 

“You have to, the bottle chose you.” Reggie grinned. You rolled your eyes. 

“The bottle doesn’t know what it’s doing.” You spat. 

“It’s simple, if you don’t want to do it that bad just give in straight away.” Flynn raised an eyebrow, looking between yourself and Luke. 

“I’m not a quitter, Y/L/N can give up.” Luke said. Your eyes narrowed. 

“What makes you think I’m a quitter Patterson.” You stared at the boy across from you, venom in your eyes. 

“There’s only one way to settle this then.” Julie spoke up after a moment of silence. 

“Play the fucking game.” Alex finished, his head resting on Willie’s shoulder. 

You rolled your eyes, standing up and making your way over to Luke. You knelt down in front of him, glaring at him. 

“I still hate your fucking guts.” You told him. He smirked. 

“The feeling’s mutual princess.” His tone was condescending. 

You placed your hand on his thigh, leaning in and sucking on his neck. He scoffed. 

“Is that all you’ve got Y/L/N?” He teased. 

You pulled away, glaring at him again before moving your hand up his thigh, getting dangerously close to his crotch, your eyes never leaving his. He didn’t even bat an eyelid. 

You held back a scowl, frustrated that Luke was so good at this game. Standing up you sat down in his lap, grinding your ass into his dick. You grabbed his hand and placed it onto one of your boobs, and your friends whistled at the scene. 

Luke fake yawned and this time you couldn’t help but scowl. 

“Are you fucking kidding? Nothing? Maybe Carrie is right and you are in love with Reggie.” You said, and Reggie choked on his drink. 

“Guess you’re not as seductive as you thought, sweetheart.” Luke teased, ignoring the comment about Reggie. You moved again so that you were straddling his hips, and you could feel that his dick was slightly hard in his pants. Motivated by this you started rocking back and forth, trying to ignore the feelings of pleasure shooting through your body. 

“I feel like we shouldn’t be watching this.” Flynn joked, covering Julie’s eyes with one hand and Reggie’s with her other.

“You guys were the ones who wanted this.” You reminded them, stopping and looking Luke in the eyes. You had always known that Luke was an attractive guy, his arrogance often outshining his good looks, but up close he was stunning. You hesitated and he smiled, glancing down at your lips. Your heart started to race and you mentally kicked yourself. 

This was Luke Patterson, the same boy who you had hated ever since Julie had first introduced him to you. 

The boy who was so self centered he couldn’t handle things not being about him.

The boy who you fought with every single time you saw him. 

He lent closer and you froze. Was he going to kiss you? 

“I- I give up.” You stuttered, jumping out of his lap and rushing back to your spot. 

“I knew you’d chicken out.” Luke sung, a smug look on his face. 

You were silent, and Luke’s cocky grin fell, concern flicking through his eyes for a brief moment. 

“Hey Julie, it’s getting late, everyone needs to go home.” Ray said, stepping into the studio and you stood up quickly, rushing to grab your bag as the others stood up slowly. 

“You sure you don’t wanna stay the night Y/N?” Julie asked as you flung your bag onto your back. You nodded.

“Yeah I’m sure, my mum would kill me.” You said, and she nodded understandingly. 

“Can I walk you home?” Luke blurted out, and everyone turned to look at him in shock. He shrugged. 

“What? I may hate her guts but I still don’t want her to be murdered on the way home.” He said, and you could have sworn you saw a slight blush on his cheeks.

“No it’s fine, my house is just around the corner, Alex or Reggie can walk me.” You replied, glancing at your two friends. 

“Yeah I can-” Reggie stopped, noticing the glare that Luke was shooting him. “Actually sorry Y/N, I really have to get home quickly before my parents realise I was gone.” 

“Alex?” You tried. The blond boy shook his head. 

“Sorry babe, Willie and I are heading in the complete opposite direction.” Alex shot you a sympathetic look. You sighed, turning your attention to Luke. 

“Fine, let’s go Patterson.” You said, giving in. 

Luke followed behind you as you left the garage and headed out onto the street, walking in silence for a few minutes before you decided to speak up.

“So what’s your motive?” You asked. Luke frowned.

“My what?” He asked.

“Why are you walking me home? You said yourself you hate my guts.” 

“Can’t I just be a good friend?” He tried. You rolled your eyes.

“We’re not friends.” You reminded him. He shrugged as you turned heading down your street.

“Okay.” He replied simply. You stopped in front of your house, spinning on your heels to look at him.

“So?” You questioned. He hesitated, his normally confident aura gone. He opened his mouth to speak but decided against it, instead taking a step towards you. You looked up, your eyes meeting his, and your heart skipped a beat when you noticed the lust in his eyes.

“Luke.” You muttered quietly, and suddenly your back was pressed against the front wall of your house, his lips on yours.

Your brain short circuited. No one had ever kissed you with that much passion before.

You kissed him back with just as much force, the lust and alcohol clouding your better judgement.

He pulled away to take a breath and you wordlessly grabbed him by the shirt, pulling him towards your front door. You reached into your bag to find your keys, Luke’s lips on your neck sucking hard enough that you were definitely going to have a few marks to cover in the morning. You got the door unlocked and you kicked it open, spinning around to capture Luke’s lips with your own again, kissing him as you dragged him into your house.

“Are your family home?” He questioned breathlessly as he pulled away. You nodded.

“Just mum.” You told him as you lead him up the stairs, him trailing behind you like a lost puppy. “But she doesn’t care if I bring people home to fuck as long as we’re safe.”

You reached your bedroom door and opened it, shoving Luke inside before shutting and locking the door behind you.

He roughly shoved you against the door, lips connecting once more in a passionate kiss full of tongues and roaming hands.

You kicked off your shoes and began to strip down, your lips never once leaving his, and he did he same. You briefly pulled apart for him to remove his shirt, but once it was off his lips were back on yours again.

“Fuck.” He groaned, as your naked bodies pressed against each other.

“Speaking of, can you please?” You teased, pushing off the wall and placing your hands on his shoulders, leading him to your bed.

You gave him a light shove so that he fell backwards, and you climbed on top of him, straddling his waist, almost moaning at the feeling of his hard dick slipping between your folds.

“God Y/L/N.” Luke groaned as you began to move your hips, grinding into his boner.

“Shut up.” You told him.

He flipped you over, pinning you against your bed, his hand coming up to grab at your neck, choking you slightly.

You moaned loudly, not even caring that your mother might hear. She’d know in the morning by the marks littering your body.

“You like that? You like it when I choke you?” Luke questioned, placing a bit more pressure on your neck but not enough to hurt you or constrict your airways. 

“Fuck, yes.” You moaned in response.

“Of course you do, you dirty little whore.” His words made you even wetter, hips bucking up for some kind of contact.

“Patterson please just fuck me.” You groaned. He smirked.

“If you say so.” He sat up, hands running down your sides, before hesitating slightly.

“Do you have...” He paused, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

“Are you clean?” You questioned. He nodded. “Me too. Just fuck me.”

“But what about-” He started.

“I’m on the pill.” You cut him off. “Please Luke.”

He smirked.

“I think you need to beg a bit more.” He teased. 

“Fuck me right now or you’ll be jerking off in the street alone.” You threatened.

“Jesus princess, no need to be so pushy.” He said as he lined up his dick with your hole, pushing in roughly causing you to gasp.

“Fuck.” You exclaimed. He barely gave you time to adjust before he was pounding into you again, causing the both of you to swear loudly.

“Again.” You stuttered out, and he obeyed, slamming into you again.

“That feels so good.” You groaned.

“Oh yeah?” He smirked, repeating his actions to see your reaction.

“Yes you cocky bastard.” You spat, and he grinned.

“Fuck you.” He said.

“Please.” You bit back. He grinned, before beginning to thrust hard, creating a rhythm. His hand went back to your throat again, pressing down causing you to moan loudly.

“Fuck if you keep this up I won’t last.” You groaned. He bit his lip as he continued to pound into you.

“Me neither.” He admitted. He sped up his pace, the room filled with the sounds of slapping skin and your breathless moans.

“Fuck, I’m close.” He said, and you felt the familiar feeling pooling in your stomach.

“Me too.” You said. He glanced at you, seemingly hesitant to say something.

“What?” You questioned.

He bit his lip.

“Could you... tell me that I’m doing good?” He questioned, somewhat shyly.

“You have a praise kink?” You asked.

“Maybe...” He replied quietly.

“God Luke this feels so good. You feel so good.” You moaned, smirking at his reaction.

“Okay yes, I have a praise kink.” He admitted, squeezing your throat slightly as a warning not to tease him. You gasped.

“Yes Luke. So good.” You praised, and he moaned slightly.

“I’m gonna cum.” He said between moans.

“Ugh yes, fill me with your hot cum like the good boy you are.” You moaned, and he came undone, hips stuttering as he came inside you. The feeling of his cum coating your insides was enough to set you off too, your walls clenching around him as you came hard.

“I hate you.” You moaned.

“I hate you more.” He replied breathily.

You rode out your highs together and he pulled out, flopping down next to you.

“Mind if I stay the night?” He asked softly. You hesitated.

“No, I don’t mind.” You eventually decided. You turned your head to look at the boy next to you, his hair stuck to his head with sweat, and you suddenly realised that maybe you didn’t hate Luke Patterson as much as you thought you did.

You forced yourself to get up and clean off in the bathroom before climbing back into bed still naked with Luke.

He snuggled into your side and you pressed a soft kiss to his head, an oddly intimate gesture to someone you had claimed to hate up until an hour or so ago.

“Goodnight Y/N.” Luke whispered softly, his voice full of sleep.

“Goodnight Luke.” You replied, and with that the two of you drifted off to sleep, until the next morning when a shout woke you from your slumber.

“Oh my god did you two fuck?” Alex’s voice startled you, and you groaned, pulling the covers up over your head.

You were never going to live this one down.

[bonbonthedragon]

HAIABDUSJWIIW I deleted an ask on accident instead of clicking answer- so heres my summery of it - I can only remember two characters they requested so if your this anon plz correct me in the comments and I can edit it :( for now I’ll add a random extra and hope it was the same

So... CALLING ALL THAT READERS THIS PLZ CHECK AND SEE IF ITS YOURS SO YOU CAN CORRECT MEH BC IM DUMB

I know there was Bakugou and mirio in it and a third one - so ima do extra people if that’s okey and please tell me if I’m missing that person :) I added Kirishima, Mirko and hawks :)

Request- can you do (blank) with a short s/o that has a case of rbf (resting b-word face) and seems really cold when she’s super sweet and nice

Bakugou

This bitch

He really thought you had something against him or som

He looked across the room and you’d make eye contact and how stoic your face was and the frown you wore just made him want to punch you

Challenges you often and you just sit there like 👁👄👁 what you want angry man

You: *jus sittin*

Baku: got a problem with me hah?! I’ll fucking kick your ass short stacks!

You: ...

Kamanari somehow made friends with you and you were part of the bakusquad

So he had to get to know you

He literally never heard you talk

So when you two are left alone for a few min and you ask him for a pencil and your voice is so soft and sweet like honey-

This man was like tf

Then he saw how kind you were, making treats for them and helping with others homework

How were you so cute

Don’t take it that you aren’t badass though

You definitely have kicked his ass on the field multiple times

It just makes him fall in love with you even more

He might not admit it but he’ll come around to show he likes you :)

Mirio

This baby

It’s the first day of school and no one will go near you bc you look so scary

Of course we are talking about this sunshine here so of course he went up to you

You just looked up at him

Didn’t even mean it and it looked like a scowl

He was like - oh sorry for bothering you haha

And walked away

That’s doesn’t stop him though

Surprisingly you and tamaki know each other from fatgums agency

So he ask questions

Tama tells him that you not so bad, your super sweet and often bring pastries from the bakery next store for them

He still doesn’t make a move, he more watches and observes

Now that he thinks about it - you seem to always be in your own world

You never yell or anything and yet others tend to stay away from you

One day he saw you patrolling with Kirishima

His heart fluttered when he saw you

Smiling and joking with the younger hero in training

Your laugh was just so beautiful that he didn’t even realize he stopped in the middle of the street and a car was honking at him

You looked over and waved and he knew he was done for

You: mirio? *you called out* come here! Get out of the street!

Mirio: uh- huh? What? Oh!

You: *grabs his arm and pulls him too the sidewalk and giggles*

Mirio: *blushhhhh*

Kirishima

Baby boy

Oh dear

He as intimidated for sure

I know he’s friends with Bakugou but like, idk, he felt like you didn’t want him there so he strayed away

He really wanted to get to know you though

He likes when he goes to train with baku in gym gama and your there

He’s never talked to you but something about you always had him stealing glances in class

He doesn’t care what everyone else says or how scary you look, you entrance him

When he sees you on the field he knows your letting loose

Gets to see some of the real you

Even gets to see you break a smile when you take someone down or get a move right

He wanted to invite you to lunch or hang out with the bakusquad but he saw that todoroki already snatched you

Lowkey made him sad

One day he thought of a idea and talked with todoroki and told him he wanted to get close and what he knew about you

Said some pretty unbelievable things that he wouldn’t have thought todoroki was capable of saying- ya know- since he’s so mellow

Saying how you joked a lot and were way too nice, often brought goodies to the table at lunch and were just over all sweet

Bamboozled but he knew deep down you had a good heart

He got the confidence to speak to you

Todo was right

Your voice was sweet like candy and you laughed so beautifully

Definitely comes to hang in your dorm and introduce you to his friends

Their bamboozled and he loves the look on their faces when you speak

You: I brought brownies! I hope there okay

Kiri: *heart explodes*

You: oh, I also made you a cookie Kirishima-san

Kiri: jwkdvidesiosbd thank you

Hawks

Pfffttt

This bitch

Your a pro who is just rising and rising fast

Of course he takes interest bc he doesn’t want to get passed up bc you super hot and pretty and ong how can someone be so pretty

You can’t tell me this man doesn’t have his own resting bitch face

But yours wins

He’s just a tad a lot bit intimidated

But he also sees it as a reason to break you and poke fun, so expect him to annoy you when the gala and charts come up

I feel like he’s going to cover it all up with smug and try and show you who’s still “boss” - literally even though you didn’t do shit like tf this birb

He’ll walk up and be like

Hawks: *randomly pops up by you with a drink in hand at the gala* ya know I saved a whole building of people

You: ...cool-

Hawks: no need to be upset or jelouse baby *walks away*

Hawks is friends with Mirko

He’ll go up to Mirko and point at you and be like, yeah they’re upset that I’m so great- why they mad all the time too? What up with that?

Inset Mirko laughing her ass off

She’s like, you’ve never talked to hem have you?

He just is like...no?

She introduced you two

You seem to light up when you see her and Mirko smiled back

Fuck your smile is even more beautiful

When you confirm you two haven’t officially met you introduce yourself

Your voice is so sweet and your demeanor just completely changed- he was being such a show off dick and you were still being so nice

He blushes so hard that he exuses himself

He doesn’t really know what to do so he avoids you the whole night not knowing what to do with his beating heart

Next days patrol you find him and apologize, saying you didn’t know what you didn’t wrong and know you tend to look like you don’t care and we’re sorry if you didn’t seem interested

He’s just like makdhsibsiw no your were perfect ksossisjsin I just didn’t know my heart could do flips

Mirko

Hahahahah

I love her so much

She loves you right when she lays eyes on you

Rising hero who’s on her tail and everyone fears them? Oh yeah she’s interested

You can’t tell me this girl doesn’t have a resting bitch face either

I like to believe this woman is not 5’2 and is in fact at least 5’10 or 6ft

So when she sees you around, small but with the face that tells everyone you won’t take anybody’s shit

She’s interested

Will know you through endeavor

You work at his agency instead of having your own

She wonders how you two don’t clash heads until she walks in for a meeting with the no.1 hero and you are in the lobby- looking all Emily and sweet

She does a complete 180- like what you doing lookin so cute and treating everyone like pure sunshine?

Your with 3 UA kids, looking to be explaining something when one decides to resort back at you and you hold up your hands with a worried face

Her heart, she wants to go defend you bc you looked so uncomfortable or at least like you didn’t know how to handle the boy

And you just so happen to be in the meeting and you brought cookies

You barely spoke and sat by Endeavor at the end of the table

She couldn’t get her eyes off you, what she thought was a mean person was timidly sitting and doodling on the documents you had in front of you

Mirko:*intensely starting*

You: *giving small worried glances*

Mirko: *smiles*

You: *becomes blushing mess*

Yeah your the one

[write-like-wright]

u asked for requests so im here to comply😳could you maybe do a ”should you date them” with the defense attorneys in the series?? or just generally some other characters?? bc the prosecutor one added like 20 years to my lifespan lmao. hope u have a great day!!

I'm so glad you liked it!!! Here's the sequel, just for you <33

Original post here

Should you date them: Ace Attorney defense lawyers edition

Phoenix Wright

yes, you really should

probably one of the best, if not the best, boyfriends in the series

wanna get married? husband material

wanna have kids? father material

has a tendency to casually adopt children actually, could be an issue at some point

worships you

you know how some guys brag about how they'd die for you?

Nick would unironically die for you

may even come close a few times but I'm pretty sure he's canonically invincible (eating poisoned glass and falling off a burning bridge, who?? tis' but a scratch!)

massive gossip

gets home after an investigation and immediately starts like "you won't believe what I found out about Gumshoe today"

somehow surprisingly mature and good at keeping secrets in spite of everything

has a lot of really cool friends!!! and larry

have you seen those shoulders tho?? mans built like a dorito, smashing through massive wooden doors n stuff

biggest monthly expense is hair gel

claims his hair is natural but you know better

don't be the big spoon, he will poke your eyes out

can somewhat read your mind tho? a bit off-putting but ok

marry him before Edgeworth someone else does

Mia Fey

hell yeah, dude

cool, calm, collected

has literal superpowers

successful business owner at 27!!! unironical #girlboss

went from being a lame rookie to a literal legend with her own practice and an apprentice in, like, three years

she's so smart, I fear her

has the fashion sense of a female character drawn by a cis man... oh, wait

god help whoever tries to hurt you

will literally kick their ass to hell

family-oriented

believes in second chances

took phoenix under her wing after everything, mia has the patience of a saint honestly

drops cool oneliners in everyday speech like a marvel character

curve lovers rejoice

doesn't mind being called dorky nicknames

major wife material

Diego Armando/Godot

I already covered him in my prosecutors list,, literally did not occur to me to split Diego and Godot into two lists

but to sum up, if I had to choose between the two, I'd go for Diego

i like my men like i like my coffee - tall, dark and bitter

^^ eats up pickup lines like those

Apollo Justice

Polly is such a sweet babey boy, please be nice to him

short king

low on confidence, makes up for it by being loud

*voice cracking* HE'S FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!

your neighbours will hate him

such a pushover, will do anything you ask of him

sensitive boy, not afraid to cry

pretends not to be dorky - is very dorky

consumes nerdy media almost exclusively (canonically a Whovian! but Capcom can't say that)

bikes everywhere and is apparently good with a hula hoop

Polly got cake is what I'm saying

have you seen his cool street style clothes?? sk8er boi

very grounded, literally

might play around and hold your hand for comfort

won't come to visit you if you live on a high floor, sorry

cat dad!!! cat pics!!! yes!!!

about 7 different tragic backstories

new secret family member drops every week

stares at you when you speak sometimes

is he jealous of Klavier?? does he have a crush on him??? who knows but it's funny watching them interact

bicon

spends way too much time on his hair

someone please date him, he deserves some love

Athena Cykes

holy childhood trauma batman

been through a lot

total empath

if you're sad, she's sad

can kinda read your mind... why is this such a common thing in AA games?? I like my privacy

super energetic

will drag you to the gym, take you on hikes, practice wrestling moves on you...

you will always be sore but also in the best shape of your life

has minus 25 chill

incapable of keeping secrets from you

her weird goth convict uncle threatens you every once in a while

she promises he means it in a friendly way

loves europop

way too accomplished for her age, everyone in this game is so smart, help

i feel like she'd enjoy theme parks idk

date her, she's baby and she needs some TLC

Kristoph Gavin

no

he's scary

thinks he's better than you

thinks he's better than everyone

has the audacity to wear white shoes with a blue suit??? are you going to prom????? sir????

obsessed with phoenix wright to an alarming degree

perfectly manicured nails!

the kind of guy who warns you never to go into his basement

nice on the outside but it's all fake

deeply rooted issues even he's unaware of

if you like drillbit hair consider Klavier instead

Ryunosuke Naruhodo

world's biggest baby

secretly a bitch

loves to clown on people

fake it till you make it

has no clue what he's doing most of the time

very determined in spite of that

everyone loves him

so many cool friends

cries at the thought of your bare ankles

physically incapable of walking by a shop and not buying something he doesn't need

"look, i got you a gift!!" "awh, how sweet! ...what is it?" "i don't know, i'll ask Mr Sholmes when he gets home!"

good with his tongue

may be somewhat trapped in the closet

has literally zero chill

remember when he just casually chased armed robbers??

must be a family trait

Iris interrogates you about your intentions with her brother

she has a gun

you have no privacy at his place

Sholmes crashes your dates

his bromance with Kazuma sometimes drops the "b"

becomes ultra cool eventually

hop into that time machine and date Ryu's ass, but be prepared to deal with period-appropriate homoeroticism and misogyny lol

Extra little shout out to Kazuma Asogi for that one time where he was a defense lawyer for, like, an hour and a half and somehow managed to cram 50 of the horniest one-liners in the game in that very limited time. Date him.

[mindmeltonabun-blog]

Tale of the Nine Tailed: Explanation of Lee Rang’s Death and Lee Yeon’s Ending Scene

Well folks...here we are once again. I did say that I would not write another TOTNT post unless there was anything worth discussing in the finale. I know many of you may feel utterly devastated or somewhat confused by how TOTNT ended, but I hope my post will be able to comfort you somehow. Anyways, let’s put on our thinking caps one last time for TOTNT!

Lee Rang’s Death

One of the biggest complaints many have had is the death of Lee Rang. Many said that the writer did him dirty while others wished that Lee Yeon and Ji Ah would’ve died instead. However, when we looked at his character arc’s as a whole, his death was justified. We mustn’t forget that he murdered hundreds possibly thousands in wake of his anger. 

Yes, he did do some good towards the end of his life such as taking in Yuri and Kim Soo, but that shouldn’t discredit all the atrocious acts he had committed in the past. Saving the life of two people doesn’t make up for all of the lives he had taken. Additionally, it is noted that Lee Rang did also assist the Imoogi’s group to bring the Imoogi back to life which caused for a slew of horrible events to occur in the first place. 

In the end, it was Lee Rang’s turn to sacrifice for the one he loved. Everything in TOTNT is cyclic if you think about it. First Ah Eum died to save Lee Yeon then Lee Yeon died to save Ji Ah. Therefore, it was only logical that it was Lee Rang’s turn to die for the one he loved which was Lee Yeon. 

Everything in life isn’t all rainbows and sunshine, what matters is what you do despite being dealt a bad fate. Both Lee Yeon and Ah Eum/Ji Ah weren’t dealt with a particularly good fate, but yet they still remained good people. Unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said for Lee Rang. Yes, he was dealt with a bad fate with having been born with a mother who didn’t want him, but he was also lucky because he had been taken in by a brother who greatly cherished him. Instead of appreciating the time he shared with Lee Yeon and remaining a good person even after the events of Lee Yeon leaving for the Samcheon River, Lee Rang still decided to take a turn for the worst. 

Over and over again, Lee Rang had escaped the punishment he so rightly deserved. For example, even after killing those villagers, Lee Yeon spared his life. Lee Rang had been basically living off on borrowed time. In a way, Lee Rang was lucky that during that borrowed time he was able to resolve the misunderstanding he had with Lee Yeon as well as have a small family of his own. Finally, if there’s anything TOTNT has taught us, it’s that if something is the will of the afterlife judges, it will be carried out eventually. One can’t escape their punishment.

In my opinion, things could have gone a lot worse for Lee Rang in the end. Meaning he could have been reborn as a shrimp. Instead, the afterlife judges granted him reincarnation as a boy who had a mother who cared for him and granted him his last wish which was to meet his brother again. He got all of wishes fulfilled. Thus, it was a satisfying ending for Lee Rang. 

Update 12/07/2020: Does Lee Yeon Meeting Reincarnated Lee Rang Indicate Many Years Have Passed?

No, it doesn’t. The team probably wanted to use the same child actor (Joo Won Lee; DOB: 05/03/2011) as to imply that Lee Rang had been successfully reincarnated. Sure, they could’ve used someone who was a few months old, but how then would Lee Yeon recognize Lee Rang ? Remember that Lee Yeon only met Lee Rang when he was around 9 years old. There would be no way for Lee Yeon to recognize what a few months old Lee Rang could’ve looked like. Get it ? Again, Lee Yeon meeting reincarnated Lee Rang happened in 2021!

Why Does Lee Yeon Still Have His Gumiho Powers?           

Initially, when I first watched this I was beyond shocked, left confused, and was rethinking my opinion of Lee Yeon as a good person. However, once I watched it with subs and then did a little research into how Gumihos can become human, the ending scene made sense. Again, everyone should’ve taken Jo Bo Ah’s advice of looking up myths and see to how they pertain to whatever happened in TOTNT.

Anyways, in legends, Gumihos can become human in the following ways:

1)    Refrain from killing and eating humans for 1000 days

2)    The human who found out a Gumiho’s true nature, must tell no one of its secret for 10 years

3)    Over a period of 100 days (other versions say 1000 days or ~3 years), Kumiho must not be detected by the human they are married to.  If the Gumiho fails on this quest, they will lose any chance of becoming human and will be a Gumiho for 1000 years

4)    Gumiho must consume the livers of 1000 humans over 1000 years. If they do not do this by the end of 1000 years, the Gumiho will dissolve in foam/bubbles

In particular, the ending scenes was in reference to #3. When Lee Yeon had came back to life, he was still technically a Gumiho hence why he could enter the Office of the Afterlife. I know you might ask well why didn’t Taluipa or Shin Ju sense he was still a fox? Because at the same time Lee Yeon was human, but only during the day or nights when there wasn’t a full moon (read further below for an explanation). Additionally, Lee Yeon probably didn’t tell Shin Ju because he didn’t want there to be any possibility that information would get leaked to Ji Ah. Better safe than sorry was Lee Yeon’s personal philosophy!  

Although, Lee Yeon did come pretty close to being discovered as a Gumiho when he let it slip that he knew that their child would be a daughter. This all goes back to the intro in Ep 1 where it is said that Gumihos have the “ability to see miles ahead”. Luckily for Lee Yeon, he convincingly tricked Ji Ah and played it off as he was just saying weird things.

Until his 100 days were up, Lee Yeon had to keep his Gumiho nature hidden from the only person who mattered which was Ji Ah. Let’s be honest here, it’s really hard to trick Ji Ah so Lee Yeon had to be super careful around her. Usually in legends, Gumihos fall short of reaching the 100 days because they are discovered by their betrothed. During Lee Yeon’s 3 months transitional phase of becoming human, a situation arose that could’ve have caused Ji Ah to discover that Lee Yeon was still a Gumiho aka Mr Samjae entering into Ji Ah’s life. 

This caused a problem because whatever misfortune befell on Ji Ah it would also inadvertently affect Lee Yeon too. Meaning that if Lee Yeon didn’t get rid of the Samjae, it could cause Ji Ah the misfortune of finding out Lee Yeon still was a Gumiho, thus ruining his plan of ever becoming human. 

The only way anyone could tell Lee Yeon was still a Gumiho was to have seen him during a full moon. This was in reference to how in legends, werewolves (also in the same canine family as a fox) can only undergo transformation into a wolf when there was a full moon (symbolistic of metamorphosis). So while in the transitional state of Gumiho and human, Lee Yeon was able to take advantage of there being a full moon to be able to transform into a Gumiho. Subsequently, Lee Yeon then used his Gumiho abilities to rid of Mr. Samjae Spirit. Thus, Lee Yeon eliminated a potential threat that could have caused Ji Ah to find out his Gumiho nature before the 3 months of remaining undetected was completed.

Flash forward approximately 3-4 years later after Lee Yeon’s face off with the Samjae, Lee Yeon is now seen as having been successful at becoming a full human as well as having daughter with Ji Ah as seen here in the following pictures (family picnic). My only complaint is that the production/editing team ended up deciding to not include the following scene. I do not know whether it was their decision or the writer’s to not include this. There could be numerous reasons why such as they had wanted to leave the possibility of there being a season 2 or there was limited time allotted for the length of ep 16 or the writer had wanted to leave an open ending. Whatever the reason, I do hope we will eventually show this to us. In doing so, they would give so many of us the proper closure we needed for TOTNT!

Side note, it looks like Lee Yeon and Ji Ah did end up introducing their daughter to her adoptive grandparents. Awww!

Updated 12/07/2020: Timeline of Samjae + Lee Yeon’s Transitional Period

There were also a bunch of questions concerning when exactly the whole scenes with Ji Ah and Lee Yeon had occurred. This occurred in 2021.

Samjae is believed to occur over a three-year period, and follows calculations based on the twelve zodiac signs. The first of the three years is known as deulsamjae (Kor. 들삼재, lit. entering the three calamities), the second, nuulsamjae (Kor. 누울삼재, lit. middle of calamities), and the third, nalsamjae (Kor. 날삼재, exiting the three calamities). The first year in this three-year cycle is supposed to be the most unfortunate. 

Source: https://folkency.nfm.go.kr/en/topic/detail/4151

So doing a little math, one will be able to see what years the Samjae entered (deulsamjae), remained (nuulsamjae), and then exited (nalsamjae). So the Samjae entered into Ji Ah’s life in 1994, 2003, 2012, and 2021. The cycle of every 9 years refers to the time period from one Deulsamjae year to the next (not every 9 years from her year of birth). For example, 1994 + 9 = 2003, 2003 + 9 = 2012, and 2012 + 9 = 2021.

What the show was trying to convey is that when Mr. Samjae came into Ji Ah’s life, it also coincided at the same time as Lee Yeon’s 3 months transitional period. Additionally, there were some who asked, “Aren't we to assume that many years have passed because Lee Yeon did say first root canal, first picnic, first snowfall, etc ?”. No, I took that scene as him mentioning things he either already did or will eventually experience.

Anyways, I really didn’t think I needed to point all of this out because I had assumed you all would’ve put on your thinking caps by now!

Last Remarks.

I hope that this post was able to resolve any confusion many of you may have had about the last episode. The writer did truly keep us on our toes until the very end. But with a little research into myths as well as analyzing everything as a whole, one should’ve been able to understand where the writer was coming from. Again, I want to give a big thanks to the cast, crew, and writer for all their hard work to give us TOTNT!

[obae-me]

Hi, I'm back with another ask (if you're still taking them)! Can I request the demon brothers reacting to an MC who usually shies away from touch, but absolutely melts under headpats? Thank you, I love your works, and I hope you aren't overworking yourself!! 💙

I live for the fluff, and I hope this warms your heart reading as much as I did while writing it! Thank you for your request, stay safe and take care of yourself! 💜

Lucifer

He’s not super touchy himself, so any form of physical affection he shows MC is minimal. A hand on their shoulder, an escorting arm, just simple gentlemanly gestures. When he saw that MC wasn’t quite comfortable with these, going so far as to sometimes move away from his body, he stopped even doing those out of respect for their space. He understood more than most that some people didn’t like being touched.

He wasn’t paying attention when he had first done it, giving MC a pat on the head. He was exhausted, having spent all day in meetings, doing paperwork, and cleaning up the messes of his brothers. He was running low on sleep, patience, and logic. His only main focus was work. MC had offered a helping hand, and he didn’t refuse, in fact he was secretly thankful for assistance. Normally, his pride would force him to carry his own work and burdens on his shoulders, but tonight he would let it slide. They handed him some of his work back, all thoroughly checked and edited by their hands. He took the stack without even looking at them, deeply concentrated in another project.

“Thank you,” he muttered, and raised his free hand to touch the top of their head, tapping them with the softest brush of his fingers. It took a moment for his action to register, and he quickly looked up from his work, opening his mouth to apologize for his folly. Then he saw the expression on their face. For once they weren’t moving away from his hands, but instead even shifting their posture so his fingers were now entangled in their hair. Their cheeks were tinted pink as they blushed, and Lucifer tried to ignore the strange flutter in his chest. He smiled tauntingly, but in a sweet way, happy to see that he had now discovered a way to give them praise. His eyes narrowed in on their complexion as it grew redder the more he moved his hand over their head.

He made a note of this interaction for the future. The next time they were alone and he thanked them, he raised his hand, looking MC with a teasing expression. He watched patiently as they squirmed in place before coming over to him. He made sure they incited the action on their own, placing their head under his touch before he patted their head.

He savors moments like these in private, this interaction a secret and intimate display for just him alone. He adores headpats where he can weave his fingers through their hair, taunting them with merely his fingertips. If he’s feeling extra special, he’ll take his gloves off for it. He’d become secretly addicted to this for sure.

He’ll use this method to reward MC whenever they do something that pleases him. It pays off in dividends. He’ll probably tease them for it later when he discovers they’ve been studying harder and been doing chores without him asking for it.

It fills him with enormous pride that they’ll come to him for this. “Hm, what is it you want? Did you want my touch and praise so badly?”

Mammon

Typically anyone who takes the time out of their day to attempt to touch Mammon is when they’re wanting to beat the Grimm out of him for something he’s done. So, because of this, he’s not super touchy either. It’s not that he doesn’t like touch, he’s just not had too many great experiences. So he can relate to how MC feels.

Surprisingly, it was MC who gave him the headpat first. He’d failed a test, already been through an intense lecture by Lucifer, and now his precious Goldie had been taken away yet again, threatened to be put through a shredder. To cheer himself up, he went to MC’s room. When they let him vent, he couldn’t stop telling them how much of an angel they were. He’d been sitting on MC’s floor, his back leaning against their bed while MC sat on top of their mattress. He was getting real deep with his feelings, saying things MC had never heard him be comfortable enough to talk about.

They wanted to comfort him and to reward him at the same time. Not knowing what to do, MC leaned forward and nervously rubbed the top of his head. “There there.”

At first, all the hair on the back of his neck stood on end, warning signals running through his mind as his nerves went on high alert. But then the soothing circles over his head put him more at ease, MC’s comforting voice lulling his fears away. MC was...was...giving him a...a...He almost found himself slipping to the floor, but then he snapped out of it.

“Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi, what’re you doing?” He tore free from them, getting to his feet as he stared down at them. His glasses were slightly crooked and hanging near the end of his nose in his flustered state. “I’m supposed to be the bigger man here, the one supporting you! So…” With a finger, he pushed his glasses up near his face before he hovered a hand above their hair. He took a deep breath, and then gave them a headpat in return, watching their expression and body language go through the same temporary panic as he did.

But then they practically melted in his hands, their eyes shiny with un-spilt tears as their touch starved body received some physical attention. Mammon did his best to prevent his face from getting even hotter than it already was. Who knew he’d love giving them headpats even more than getting one himself?

He’ll dole out headpats to MC left and right now, doesn’t matter when, where, or why, he’s greedy so when he wants to do it there’s no stopping him, but on this particular matter MC doesn’t bother stopping him anyway. He doesn’t ask for something in return for this gesture, for once, but occasionally MC gives him a pat on the head in exchange, watching him stutter as he turns a deep pink.

He loves giving MC headpats where he messes up their hair, ruffling it up and making it wild-looking just so he can do it all over again when they try to fix it.

Levi

You think his brothers are touch starved? He’s probably not had physical contact for decades, but part of that is his fault. He’s always yelling not to be touched, exclaiming loud enough that people in the Celestial Realm could hear, that he needs his personal space. He freaks out if MC accidentally even bumps shoulders with him.

He notices how MC reacts whenever he accidentally touches them, and he takes it very personally. Self doubt and anxiousness take over his mind as he secludes himself in the safe space of his bedroom. With the assistance of the brothers, MC managed to enter his comfort zone, stepping into his room. They started explaining how they were sorry that they were responsible for how he was feeling. They had to bluntly tell him that they don’t like being touched really by anyone, not just him, most things just make them uncomfortable. If there was anyone who knew about it, it was him. They sat down by him, but not too closely, and asked if watching anime with him would make him feel better.

As they’re both watching one of his favorite shows, Levi notices the expression on MC’s face whenever the main protagonist gives one of the love-interests a pat on the head. He’s the demon of envy, he knows longing when he sees it. MC’s eyes were glinting towards the screen. He had to cover part of his face with his arm just simply thinking about doing something like that with MC. It was no surprise that he wanted something like that too. 

“U-um, MC?” Levi’s brain was short-circuiting, and nothing was even happening yet. MC looked at him, their head slightly tilted to the side in curiosity. His heart was already beating out of his chest, they were cute, too cute. “Can I just...try one thing? And! And then if you hate it you can feel free to never talk to me again!” He just needed to know, the temptation of envy at watching a cartoon complete a gesture that he too wanted to make was too great to bear.

“O-okay.”

It took him a full two minutes of squirming in place and blushing to even build up the courage to put his hand in the air. Once he did, he closed his eyes and turned his head away from MC as he placed his palm over their hair. His hand stayed stagnant for a while, just resting atop their head, but then he started moving it, stroking their hair in the same fashion as he’s seen in so many of his shows. Only, he was near tears. Somehow the real thing was so much better.

Once he had finally had enough--he had wanted to keep going but he was worried his poor heart was about to give out--he apologized to MC again for touching them. MC looked down, their face almost just as red as his. When they told him that they didn’t mind and actually-maybe-kinda liked it, his eyes almost sparkled.

He doesn’t do it as often as he’d like, he’s still much too shy and anxious for that. He will manage to do it every so often, waiting until he’s had plenty of time for mental preparation. He waits to strike whenever MC is sad so he can swoop in and be their hero.

He likes the slow simple headpats, moving his hand left and right, feeling the heat inside his chest grow as MC sways their head with his movements.

Satan

Of course he doesn’t prefer being touched, why would he? He gets angry if someone even bothers him when they happen to be in the same room. He needs his space, he needs people to stay away from him, and if he does so happen to want to be touched, he needs it on his own terms. So he actually enjoyed hanging out with MC, because with them feeling the same way as he did, he didn’t have to worry they’d do something reckless like...hugging him or some awful thing.

They were reading together, his favorite activity. There was nothing better than him and his company doing their own thing within a decent distance, and all while being quiet about it. And because MC was being so well-behaved, he permitted them to sit on the same couch as him should they want it. He almost lost his place on the page as he felt their body heat wave off of them as they sat next to him.

However, MC kept moving, shifting to change position every few moments, trying to get into a comfortable reading position, but not finding one. It was driving him a bit crazy, but he understood their struggle. He weighed the pros and cons of what he was about to suggest in his head. He decided that it would mostly be in his favor. 

“Why don’t you lie down and I read to you?” He asked them, placing a bookmark in between the crevice of his book before placing it aside. They blinked at him, embarrassed that they had bothered him so badly. They got up off the couch, ready to lay on the floor. He gingerly grabbed the fabric of their sleeve. “I’m not asking you to get on the floor, I’m not that rude. To my brothers maybe, but not you.” He took the book that they had been reading and brought it to his face, already feeling some involuntary feelings rise to his cheeks. He patted his legs, hoping they would understand his gesture without him having to go through the pain of saying it.

They understood well enough, getting back on the couch and slowly, slowly, settled down with their head in his lap, their face turned away from him. MC was a bit rigid at first, but slowly relaxed as Satan started reading their story from the point they had left off at. He eventually got so enveloped in the words, he had no idea what he had been automatically doing. It took him about a chapter or two before his actions hit him randomly, his mind going blank, leaving himself tongue tied.

He’d been petting MC’s head for a while now, almost completely unaware. He assumed the feeling in his lap reminded him of a cat curled up over his legs, and he just instinctively had been stroking their head. He’d caught himself in the middle of running his fingers all the way from the top of their head, down to the nape of their neck, almost even scratching behind their ears.

“Is...is something wrong? Why...did you stop?” MC wondered, their voice gentle. He cleared his throat, deducing that their tone meant they found nothing wrong with what he had been doing. He resumed his actions, and felt MC happily shudder in his lap.

Later that night, when he was done reading, he found that he had made MC a little too comfortable, and now they were asleep on him. He didn’t dare move and actually ended up staying there all night.

He’ll only give MC headpats in this exact way, with their head over his thighs, stroking their hair like they were a cuddly pet. He’s melting almost as much as they are. To his enjoyment, MC will ask him if they can read with him much more frequently.

Asmo

He love love loves touch! So seeing MC squirm away from all his forms of affection makes him equal parts gloomy and determined. He’s never had anyone shy away from him like that, even his charm ends up rubbing off on his brothers, and they let him give them physical affection every once and awhile. He knows there has to be some form of touch MC can stand, and he’s ready to find it.

He tries hugs, hand-holding, massages, tickling, cuddling, anything he can think of in hopes MC will react positively. Touch his strongest love-language after all, so he’ll be forever downhearted if MC is never comfortable with it. Never comfortable with him...

He was close to figuring it out though, he knew it. His last massaging experiment had his hands around their head and neck, and he felt the muscles in their body unwind just the slightest bit. So, today he had them in his room, sitting on the chair in front of his mirror as he brushed their hair. Like before, they weren’t as tense, and were surprisingly complacent as he dragged his brush through their smooth strands. He was so jovial over this, he was almost humming to himself.

“MC, your hair is almost just as pretty as mine!” He put the brush down for just a second to run his fingers through their locks. MC’s body shuddered, their eyelids fluttering. The heart in his chest pounded in excitement when MC leaned their head towards his hand. He was almost as happy as the time Lucifer let Asmo give him a shoulder massage. “Hmm, what’s this?” He grinned and played with their hair some more, using his hands to pat down and fix any stray strands. MC refused to look at his gaze in the reflection of their mirror, their face adorably red. He just wanted to squeeze them! Asmo pressed his cheek to their head as he continued to pet and comb his fingers throughout MC’s hair.

He pets their head now as frequently as MC will allow. He especially prefers to do it when he notices they’re tense or stressed. Just a few minutes of his magical hands running over their head and all the tension in MC’s body practically melts away.

His special version of headpats come with special scritches. He’ll let his long nails gently scratch at their scalp, causing shudders to run through MC’s spine. Once, MC even moaned softly in comfort as he did this, causing him to almost collapse. Who knew something so chaste and simple could get him so pleased?

Beel

He’s a big lovable teddy bear, and so he loves to give hugs. It’s third on the list of things he loves, family, food (not always in that order), and comforting embraces following right after. The first time he gave MC a hug, they felt frozen, unable to hug him back. They only began to breathe again after he let them go. He respects the fact that they don’t like touch, but it will make him a bit melancholy for a while.

He only figured out MC adored headpats because they practically told him, he ended up being the only one they felt comfortable enough opening up to. Maybe it was because he couldn’t help but sulk for a few days after MC asked not to be touched. They felt a bit guilty for him, after all, he was only trying to show MC wholesome affection.

He had been in the kitchen, getting a large selection of goodies for his midnight snack when the door opened. He almost jumped when MC came into the room, as he went about clutching the food to his chest. He looked over MC before saying anything, their eyes and face a bit puffy from crying. They looked deeply upset.

Beel got so rattled from their expression, he almost dropped his precious food. He hurriedly put it all on a kitchen counter before talking to them. “MC, it’s so late, what’s wrong?” His natural instinct was to hold his arms out, ready to give them a tight embrace, but he bit his lip as he kept his arms lowered. Not knowing how best to comfort them was killing him, leaving the already gaping hole in his stomach feeling even emptier.

“I...I don’t know...I just…” MC placed their hands over their face as they began to cry some more. Beel got closer to them, every inch in his body twitching as all he wanted was to scoop them up.

“Well...what...what can I do to make you feel better? I’ll do anything!”

As they were sniffling, they outstretched one of their arms, waiting for his hand. He let them take it, taking notice of the vast difference between sizes. They felt so small next to him. MC grasped his hand with their own, doing their best to keep from shaking. Beel hadn’t quite been ready for MC to place his hand over their head, holding onto his wrist. He hesitated for a second, starting off very slow. The more he pet them, the more they started to calm down.

This made his heart swell immensely. He was so overjoyed that he was making MC happy, that he got to touch them, that he got a bit carried away as his built up emotions flowed straight to his hands. He moved his hand back and forth a bit aggressively, all purely by accident. He’d had his eyes closed as he couldn’t contain himself, his heart feeling like bursting. He was shaking MC back and forth so violently, they had to grasp onto his clothes from falling over. He quickly stopped, apologizing profusely while MC held tightly onto him as they waited for the room to stop spinning.

He will want to do this all the time, it satiates some sort of hunger in his stomach when he does, and MC doesn’t complain. Just as long as he does it gently. He’ll pet them like a fragile creature, as he closes his eyes and almost glows in happiness when he does. The gesture reminds him a lot of comforting Belphie.

Belphie

Like Satan, Belphie is only somewhat okay with touch if it’s on his terms. He almost always needs to initiate it, or ask for it at the very least. The only exception to the rule is his twin Beel. His brother is always picking him up, hugging him, or letting Belphie sleep on him.

When MC explained that they didn’t like touch, he was okay with it. What, did they think he cared? It’s no big deal, whatever, he’s too tired to worry about it. It does affect him, but he’s not even sure why. Is it because they look so soft to him that he wants to cuddle them like a pillow? Is it because he just wants to feel their sweet warmth? Is it because he wants to spite his brothers by being the only one able to touch them? He’s unsure. The only thing he is sure of is it’s making him a bit restless.

So, to deal with this, he did what came most naturally to him. That being coming into MC’s room unannounced in the dead of night. He’s still not used to normal human manners or behavior, or he doesn’t really care. Possibly both.

He watched MC sleep peacefully in bed, the silver rays of moonlight seeping through their window and landing on their head, reflecting off the color of their hair. He knelt close to the bed, tucking his pillow close to his chest as he watched them sleep for a bit. Then he lazily raised his hand, plopping it over their head. Their body jolted a bit as their eyelids opened.

“B-Belphie?” MC moved a bit, coming out of their tired haze.

“Shh, this is just a dream,” he told them, abusing his powers a bit as he influenced their exhaustion. A sleepy gaze coated their eyes. They ceased moving, nuzzling their head against the pillow as they no longer went to question why he was in their room.

He ran his hand gently over their head, watching color flush their cheeks as they stared at him in their dreamy state. Their lips almost curled into a smile, and Belphie pulled his cow-printed pillow closer to his chest, hoping to muffle the rapid beating of his heart. He pet MC’s head until they fell fast asleep again.

In the morning, MC looks at him in a weird way, more flustered than usual. He’ll tease them about it a bit, questioning their actions and feeling twisted satisfaction when they explained that they simply had experienced a strange dream last night.

He might continue to do this, giving them affection before bed and persuading them it was nothing more than a dream, but eventually he’ll want them to know it was real. He’ll just enjoy this secret interaction a little more before he does tell them, though.

He likes to pet their head in a way that lets their hair look like sleepy bed-hair, he finds it unbelievably adorable. He’ll start from the top of their head and work down towards their cheek, letting MC nuzzle against his palm before they sleep.

[smol-midgets]

Professor!Andrew AU

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

So his students know how soft he is, but they are also kind of terrified of the short midget. The constant death threats don't help

"Get used to it, you're majoring in criminology"

One day "If you don't want a knife between your ribs I'd recommend being less of a nuisance"

"Professor, you don't have knives"

Andrew looks pointedly at his armbands

".....Do you have knives in your armbands!?"

"Don't ask stupid questions"

They still don't know if he has knives in his armbands

He's staying back after school often, teaching John, some of the strikers from the team also stay back to improve further

On morning of November 4th, Andrew wakes up to Neil gently calling his name

He opens his eyes to find bright blue eyes staring down at him, hair glowing auburn from the sunlight filtering through the windows, and a gorgeous smile

Neil bends down to whisper a soft happy birthday against his lips, before lightly kissing him. "Go brush, Drew, and come out for breakfast"

He comes out for breakfast and sees Neil standing by the counter, preparing pancakes

"You made pancakes?"

"Don't worry I didn't poison them"

"You're cooking is inedible enough, you don't need the poison"

Neil pouts and Andrew has to kiss it away. One kiss turns to two, then ten, and then Andrews setting Neil on the kitchen counter, they're lips not parting the entire time

Andrew gets late for his class

when he gets there, Kevin is sitting at his desk. Students are staring because Kevin Day is sitting in their classroom in front of them

Cue Andrew's "What the fuck are you doing here"

Kevin is out of Andrew's chair in an instant "You're late for your class. And I wanted to tell you to come to that La Guardia restraunt by 6 today"

Andrew narrows his eyes "Why"

"I wanna have dinner with you"

"Why"

"What do you mean why! Can't I wanna have dinner with my best friend on his birthday??" Did he say best friend??? Professor Minyard is best friends with Kevin Day?? And it's his birthday??????

"You were never a good liar"

"I just wanna have dinner with you!"

"Try again"

Kevin's eyes dart around him, as if looking for help

"Spill day, or leave, but stop wasting my time"

*sighs* "Fine, we have a surprise planned for you"

"I hate surprises"

"We know but you'll love this one! I swear! Will you just come to the damned restaurant Andrew!?"

"No"

Kevin tries a little more, but eventually throws his hands in the air and leaves grumbling to himself (Andrew enjoys saying no to Kevin way too much)

"Is it your birthday today professor?"

"Yes"

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"I don't care about it" and that was that

When Andrew gets home Neil asks him if he enjoyed his birthday present. When Andrew only raises his eyebrows Neil says "It's been a long time since you really got to say no to Kevin. I know how much you enjoy it. That was your first birthday present. Well... second since this morning" And then smiles cheekily

Andrew rolls his eyes, but they're fond "So are you going to try to convince me to come now?"

"I definitely want you to. We know you don't like surprises but I really thought you'd enjoy this. If you say no nobody is going to force you"

"What will you give me for it?"

"Don't ask questions you already know the answer to"

And how could Andrew say no to his junkie now?

So they go to the restraunt, and all the foxes, plus a few other people from Andrew and Neil's old exy team are there (only the people they got close to). Some of Aaron's colleagues are there too. Everyone wishes Andrew and Aaron happy birthday. It's a good reunion, he gets the chance to catch up

Kevin and Aaron drink a lot and get up to weird shenanigans. Matt starts behaving like a puppy and cooing over Dan and Neil. Allison and Nicky start betting on everything and drag the rest of the foxes into it too

Andrew pretends to be annoyed by how he has to deal with the foxes' antics, but he's secretly happy to be around their weirdness again

A few hours later Neil and Andrew leave the party, and Neil takes Andrew to the roof of an abandoned building, where they share whiskey, cigarettes and kisses

They go home and cuddle and fall asleep

The next day his students have prepared an assortment of his favourite chocolates and ice creams (how he manages to maintain that body is a mystery), and a copy of a book he wanted

Andrew is just staring, and at first they think he doesn't like it but then they notice the reverent way he's holding the book (it's a book he's thought of buying for a long time)

"There's even a few cupcakes for your wife here"

"Husband" Andrew corrects automatically, finally able to unstick his tongue from his mouth, "and he doesn't like anything sweet"

Fortunately for them they quickly gather themselves and respond with smiles "Oh sorry. Well, more for you then"

They know better than to think that Andrew will thank them. But when he starts eating what they got him while teaching, they know he liked it

One day students slowly filter in the class to find a man in a large black hoodie sitting at the back of the class

Of course they are criminology students they're not going to just ignore a shady man in their class they've never seen before

So after bugging and threatening the man a little, he lifts his hoodie to reveal

Neil josten

What?!!???!!??

Several students are mortified because they just threatened Neil fucking Josten

Others are still trying to get over their shock at seeing Neil fucking Josten in real life

Andrew enters the class and looks at Neil "Aren't you supposed to be at practice". As if Neil Josten sitting in their classroom is a perfectly normal thing. Right, the only thing weird in this scenario is that he's missing practice. That's it.

Neil responds "I wanted to see you teach"

Andrew narrows his eyes "Did they kick you out? What did you do"

Now Neil looks sheepish "Ah yeah, I kind of hurt myself and Coach forced me to take the day off, but I do want to see you teach."

Andrew is visibly irritated and is grumbling something to himself quietly

The students' eyes are wide because that's probably the most emotion they've seen on their professor's face

He turns to the class and is clearly unimpressed "I don't want to be here either, but that doesn't give you free pass to stare at my face and do nothing. And you," looks pointedly at Neil, "if you're going to sit there you better keep that mouth shut."

Neil considers making a comment about how they might be staring because he's so pretty, but let's it go. However he definitely smirks at Andrew in a way that clearly says "you know how to shut me up"

Andrew tries very hard not to blush, and turns to the board in case he was unsuccessful (he was)

Everyone forcibly look away from the celebrity sitting in their classroom and try to concentrate on the lesson

Andrew makes sure they pay attention (flying chalks make for surprisingly good projectiles)

He finishes his lesson 5-10 minutes early so his students can talk to Neil like they have been dying to the entire time

In his office, later after class, Andrew looks over Neil's injuries

"It's not that bad, Drew. Really I'm f—"

He's interrupted by Andrew's mouth on his. "Don't" is all Andrew says between kisses. Neil smiles

I am SO sorry this part has come this late. I've had a lot on my plate these days. On the bright side, you will be happy to know I've found the super old post that inspired this fic! You can find it here. Credits to @humongousvoidbear for that. (I'll admit this entire fic could be better, but again, this was completely self-indulgent.)

EDIT: I have made a small edition to this part, because someone wanted a meeting of Neil and the students. This is the best I could come up with, hope you like it!

[ilikemesometaetaes]

Little One (M)

Jung Hoseok Oneshot

•••> Author: @ilikemesometaetaes​

•••> Summary: You find yourself in a position where you must choose between certainly addicting or below-average satisfaction for the rest of your life.

•••> Pairing(s): Hoseok/Reader

•••> Requested by Anon: “Hey I was wondering if you could possibly do a Hoseok smut oneshot and like hes a super dom? Love you 💜”

•••> Word Count: 6.41k

•••> Rating: 18+

•••> Tags: smut | ceo!au(?) | office!au | Hoseok!AU | Strangers to Lovers | Dominant!Hoseok | Submissive!Reader | 

•••> Warnings: smut, slight impreg!kink, oral (female receiving), unprotected sex, mention(s) of masturbation, slight choking/strangulation, spanking, dirty talk, slight mention(s) of BDSM, dom/little one relationship, hobi is filthy, but he’s also respectful, cursing, pining, mild stalking?, alcohol use

Copyright © 2020 ilikemesometaetaes. All Rights Reserved.

Thank you for the request, anon! Sorry, it took me like a week to get it done, but here it is! I hope you enjoy :) I didn’t go back and edit it so please excuse any mistakes.

~#~

The light from the chandeliers of the ballroom dimmed as the night came undeniably closer to its end.

The event was organized by your company- a Friday evening to relax and celebrate the closing of another fiscal year. The flurries of snow that dusted the sidewalks outside the venue served as a reminder that the year, in itself, was coming to an end too.

Smooth, Christmas-themed jazz music acted as a factor in your sleepy demeanor, relaxing you into a comfortable glow of warmth despite failing your mission.

You were here strictly on business; there was no time to mess around and slack off. A handful of flutes of champagne and a double pour of whiskey- which you hardly ever drank- were enough to relax you and make you confident in the success of your duty to find a proper suitor to make you cum tonight.

In the past, you had tried flings with acquaintances and a few friends, but they had turned out to be absolutely disdainful in the fact that, despite them, you had only cum twice at the hands of another in the last year and a half. Instead, you wanted to give a one night stand a try- purely for research purposes, of course. Who knew? Maybe you were into the riskiness and detachment of it all.

As the hours passed, however, you found yourself slowly resorting to the quiet and dark corners of the room, sipping on another flute of champagne in hopeless surrender with your warm buzz fading pathetically.

Unbeknownst to you, a set of dark eyes had been tracking you for a good portion of the evening. On the prowl for its prey, the owner of those eyes weighed the options sat before him, but he needed to make sure you were alone before he could risk indulging too far.

There was no ring on your finger; no one bringing you a drink; no one you interacted with longer than a short greeting and the occasional hug.

It didn’t take him very long to realize that you were incredibly and unbelievably by your lonesome.

He couldn’t help the smirk from pulling up the corner of his lips while his friends spoke loudly around him. From his seat at the table, he had a perfect view of where you stood in the shadows, however, staring too hard could prove to be the downfall of his plan as he did not want to get caught. Instead, the glass of scotch in his hand held his gaze while he rolled the sphere of ice around it in thought. He would have to be patient.

He recognized the look of defeat when he saw one. He read the way your flawless lips had slowly formed a permanent scowl of self-pity as the minutes turned into hours.

What a pitiful look on such a gorgeous little thing. He mused in thought.

By the time your phone read 12:45 am, you accepted defeat in its ugliest form. Shoulders no longer held back with your chest out and back no longer purposely arched to attract anyone, you allowed yourself to slouch.

Fuck it. You thought. Guess it’s just another date night with my magic wand.

Sourly, you left the large room to retrieve your dress coat from the coat check counter, pulling out your phone to order your Uber once you gave the desk man your ticket.

In your hunt for a ride and the slight tipsiness of alcohol still in your system, you failed to notice the presence of someone behind you.

“Excuse me, Miss.“ You jumped, knees slightly buckling in the process, and turned to find a slightly familiar man dressed in a finely-tailored Armani suit standing behind you.

“Jesus.” You mumbled before speaking up. “You scared me.”

“I apologize for the intrusion.” He laughed, sending an unexpected rush of flutters through your chest and straight to your lower belly. “I just couldn’t help myself in worrying if you were going to get home safe.”

You studied him for a moment, trying to remember who he was. His undercut, despite being a more unpopular haircut around the office, exhumed modern professionalism. A few of his black hairs that were gelled back had fallen over his forehead after several hours of holding its form throughout the night. Milky brown eyes and a narrow nose sat upon his lightly tanned but beautifully contoured face with a dark pink set of lips to grace his regal-like look.

You couldn’t help the sense of familiarity as you gazed at him. Instead of addressing his statement, you blurted out your thoughts, curiosity getting the best of you.

“I’m sorry, but… do I know you? You look so familiar to me.” He was about to respond when the desk man came back to the front with your coat in hand. Before you could reach out to grab it from him, your mystery man was taking it from his grasp.

“I’m Jung Hoseok.” He smiled, holding your coat out for you to place your arm in. So he’s a Jung, huh? Maybe he’s related to the chairman. Would be a nice snag for the night.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Hoseok. I’m Y/N Y/L/N.” You held your hand out to shake his once you successfully slid both arms into the coat. With a smoothness uncanny to any man’s hands you’ve ever felt, he took your fingers in his grasp and leaned down to touch his lips to your knuckles.

“Believe me, Ms. Y/N.” His eyes lifted to meet yours as the warm surface of his lips met your skin followed by the warm teasing exhale of his breath. You suppressed a whimper from growing in your throat. “The pleasure is all mine.”

He stood straight abruptly, shocking you out of your stupor. “So is Uber your way of getting home tonight?”

“Ah, yes. I’ve had a few drinks and I was planning on it, so I didn’t drive here.” You replied to him, hoping he would fall for the action and jump in. He nodded his head in understanding whilst you falsely resumed the task of securing a ride from a few moments ago. Please ask to take me home. Please don’t be nonchalant.

“Are you returning home alone?” Hook, line and sinker.

“Yes, I am. I do have a cat to welcome me though, so no need to worry.” You joked, hoping to push him along and give him the hint that you were very single and very available at the moment.

Deciding that your conversation should be taken outside and away from the prying eyes of your associates, you made your way out the door and into the crisp night as you spoke. The small flurries of snow began lightly pelleting your face, catching on your eyelashes. Hoseok followed close behind you, intent on listening to what you had to say.

You came to a stop on the sidewalk and faced him, shivering slightly.

“Well, I wouldn’t want to interrupt your homecoming with your cat. I’m sure he misses you dearly.” He smiled smugly, his breath forming visibly in front of him. Wow. So he’s an intellectual. He knows the game.

Fine. I’ll play.

“The homecoming won’t be too glorious. He doesn’t even greet me at the door.” You faked a pout.

Hoseok took a step closer, eliminating some of the distance between the two of you and effectively removing acquaintanceship from the air between you as he spoke. His previous polite behavior wavered slightly, transitioning your small talk “Oh? Is that so? Why?”

“I’m pretty sure he hates me even though I feed him and give him a roof over his head every day.” You chuckled with an air of breathlessness. “He’s a brat.”

“And are you?” He took another step and circled his arm around you to place his hand on your lower back, chest lightly brushing against yours. He was radiating an incredible amount of heat through the layers of his suit. You almost missed the random question with the way your vaginal floor tightened in anticipation.

“A-am I what?” You stuttered, looking up into his eyes and quickly crumbling. You hoped that he would catch you past the heady sensation of lust that crowded your veins.

“A brat.” He graveled, lifting his hand to pinch your chin between his thumb and index finger. You gasped and couldn’t help bringing your lower lip between your teeth as you were rendered silent, biting down in an attempt to use the pain as a distraction from the pooling of desire in your belly and panties. Good god, he just went right in.

Hoseok’s thumb brushed over your trapped lip, dragging it out and pinning it below his nail before he leaned in. His lips, inches from yours, held your attention and his eyes, locked on your own lips, grew dark with arousal. You thought he was going to kiss you but, instead, he only tutted and answered his own question for you. “So you are.”

The taste of his breath on your tongue was sinful with the tangible scent of his scotch overpowering the aftertaste of your whiskey and champagne. His cologne surrounded you, turning your body into a live wire as your olfactory senses were ambushed with his masculine musk.

“I’m going to need an actual answer when I ask you this, little one.” He whispered, lips mere millimeters from brushing yours. All you could do was gulp and nod in suspense of his question- but he wasn’t having it. He squeezed your chin sternly. “Verbalize.”

“O-okay.” You croaked through the lump in your throat. Hoseok smiled and released your chin from his grip, sliding his hand to your cheek to caress it instead.

“Good enough… for now.” He drew his own lip between his teeth as he slightly pulled away to scan your body in his grasp. His eyes locked on yours again, the closeness of his face scrambling your thoughts completely.

“May I be the one to take you home tonight, Ms. Y/N?” He asked genuinely.

With almost no hesitation, your desperation rose to the surface once more. “Yes. Yes, you may.”

It took mere seconds for Hoseok to back away and wave his hand in the air before a black SUV pulled up in front of the two of you. Grabbing onto your hand, he tugged you towards the vehicle.

“Mine or yours?” You asked as he opened the door for you to slide yourself across the leather seats to settle towards the far window. Following suit and settling behind the passenger seat, he spoke.

“Hm… Are you alright with coming to mine?” He asked, crowding himself on you as he shut the door behind him. His closeness was suffocating- in a good way. The way you felt the heat from his face on yours reminded you of just how close the two of you were about to get.

“I’m alright with anything, Hoseok.” You breathed, eyelashes fluttering in pure bliss. Your panties were clinging to your heat uncomfortably, begging to be removed.

“Be careful of what you say, darling. I might get a little excited.” He laughed lowly. Turning to his driver, he quickly ordered him to take him home. For a brief moment, you wondered what his place looked like and where it was.

Hoseok’s beauty was uncanny; even in the dark, you marveled at his features as the shadows of the street lights passed over them. His hands were constantly attached to you yet no kiss had been shared, causing your nerves to run rampant with tension and excitement.

After a short fifteen-minute ride, the vehicle pulled up in front of large gates and you gazed in wonder at the house that stood behind them. Situated up a small hill past a large courtyard with a giant fountain in the middle was a mansion. The mansion, from what you could see in the night, was dark brown in color due to the bricks it was built by. The fountain lit the front of it in a soft multicolored glow as it transitioned between colors.

“Wow.” You breathed, eyes locked on it as the gate opened and you were dropped off at the front steps into the cold of the night.

“Gorgeous, isn’t it?” He asked from behind you, his body heat immediately returning to your cold form.

“Absolutely.” You turned to him as you whispered, noticing the snowflakes gathering in his hair. Even as your bones chattered from how little your dress and coat properly covered your body, you still felt the heat of want flooding your veins and warming your blood deliciously. Looking into his eyes felt like the call of the wild, the sun, and anything and everything that could cause the bout of excitement and pure joy in your heart.

You just hoped he was able to make you cum tonight. At this point, with his beauty and smooth game, getting you to cum was just a plus.

“Y/N.” He muttered, taking a step to you while pushing you against the large front door to his manor.

“Yes?” You answered nervously, heart racing in your chest. Could he hear it?

“May I open my door?” He chuckled. You quickly looked behind you and realized that you were blocking the slot for his key, quickly moving to the side and rushing an apology with a blush on your cheeks. Looking at the ground, you waited until he opened the door behind you to look back up.

He was pulling you by the waist into his foyer before you could fully look at him again. “C’mere.”

Shutting the door behind you, he pressed you against the wall and pressed a kiss to your lips unexpectedly. Finally. Oh, good god he tastes so good.

His lips moved tentatively at first, smoothly molding yours to his will and pressing against your body with his. Hoseok placed his hands on your hips, sliding them delicately up your sides to your shoulders and under your coat, sliding it off with ease. He was pulling away before you could fully kiss him back, your lips chasing after his in dislike of the loss of contact.

“I’m sorry,” He heaved. “I couldn’t control myself for a moment.”

“No, Hoseok,” You whispered, sliding your hand to the back of his neck and bringing his face back to yours. “It’s okay. I want you to.” He pulled you tightly to his body with a hissed breath between his teeth.

“What? What do you want me to do, Y/N?” He picked you up by the backs of your thighs and you squealed in surprise. Automatically, you locked your ankles around him, cocktail dress making it easy to spread your legs. Hoseok continued to speak before you could reply, carrying you up the stairs as you stared intently at him. “Do you want me to nail your pussy into the bed? Do you want me to rail you until you lose your voice? Do you want me to spank you until you get welts? What? What do you want me to do?”

Wow.

Again, he made you speechless. The way his change of pace had victoriously shut you the fuck up for the second time was shocking. 

Hoseok shoving you against the wall next to a door and grinding his hips into your own pulled you from the silence-rendering shock.

“Fucking speak, Y/N. What do you want?” He said sharply.

“I want it all- all of it. Please.” You were quick to reply as his domineering tone sunk into the pores of your skin whilst you whimpered from the friction. He only smiled and took one hand out from under your leg to open the door.

“As you wish, little one.” He smirked. Swiftly, he brought you into the dark room. How he found his way to the bed, you were unsure, for even a person living in a room for years has a difficult time finding their way under such circumstances- and he was carrying you. Regardless of your wonder, you still felt the cool sheets of his bed below you as he threw you onto it with a grunt.

You laid there in the dark, confusion following when he did not follow you.

“What are you doing?” You asked, eyes attempting to adjust themselves. Hoseok chuckled, the sound ensuring you that he did not move from his spot in front of you.

“I must undress first before I can fuck you.” He laughed lowly. You blushed again, realizing that the removal of clothes was definitely a necessity. You moved to strip off your dress when he abruptly stopped you. “No. Don’t. I will undress you.”

You laid back in wait, listening to the ruffling of his clothes as you heard the articles hit the ground one by one. The sound of his belt unbuckling reawakened the jitters in your limbs, excitement reappearing in the form of more of your juices in your panties.

A deep ache sat itself on your clit, pulsing away with your heartbeat in an almost painful sensation. Trembling, you reached a hand down to relieve some of the pressure that built up over the past hour, emitting a quiet sigh from your lips once you lightly cupped your heat.

Briefly, you felt the mattress dip in front of you before his body covered yours. Tearing your hand away from your pulsing heat quickly, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders to allow him to slot himself onto your body. The warm, smooth skin of his arms underneath yours felt heavenly yet extremely intimate.

“What do you think you’re doing, little one?” He muttered onto the exposed skin of your neck, grinding himself into you and eliciting a mewl from your throat. He cracked a hand down on the side of your thigh, the hot lick of pain doing wonders to your clenched core.

“I’m sorry,” You whined as he slowly rocked against you again. “It was just hurting so bad.”

“Don’t touch yourself.” He said, pulling away to glide his hands over your calves and thighs. “That’s my job.”

In the darkness, you were beginning to make out Hoseok’s figure; a dark and foreboding form that covered your own- and he was moving downward.

“I was watching you all night.” He pressed his nose to the skin of your inner thigh, inhaling deeply. “And I just can’t find it in myself to believe that someone let you go to that thing alone.”

It was hard to think with Hoseok so close to where you needed him, but it didn’t stop the words from slipping past your lips. “Well, you obviously came alone too. How did someone let you go alone?”

Hoseok chuckled in response, tracing his nose up to your hamstrings before moving further, passing your hip bone to trail over your underwear.

“I have a very particular taste in women and you happen to be the one I was looking for.” You froze for a moment as you felt his teeth on your skin, goosebumps littering your skin again. “You smell so damn good.”

He passed his nose and mouth over your abdomen before you felt his mouth latch onto your panties and bring them down. Your heart rate picked up once more.

“Hoseok.” You breathed, watching his figure as he pulled your underwear to your knees before grabbing them with his hands and sliding them the rest of the way off.

“Y/N.” He whispered in response. “I’m going to ruin you.”

Hoseok slid his hands back up your legs, sliding under your dress and grabbing it to pull it off you.

Once your dress hit the floor, you expected him to go for your heals, but all he did was sit back and stare.

“Y/N, before we start, I must insist that you choose your safeword.” His large hand made itself present on your naked waist, gripping it lightly.

Shock filled your veins and caused a mild sense of panic within you. “S-safeword?” You stuttered. He was one of those people? Fuck. I’ve never done anything like that before.

“I assure you that I will not bring you harm and that we won’t do anything like that… yet.” You quivered under the word. “Things like that require a contract so that I have your explicit consent. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to do.”

“That’s…” You trailed off. “Actually amazing.”

“What, that there’s a contract?” He asked, scooping his arms under you to pick up your body and move you to the headboard.

“No, that you’re actually asking.” You replied, staring at the contours of his body that was now punctuated by the small amount of moonlight streaming in through his window.

“I can promise you that I never do anything like that without asking.” His voice, volume a mere breath, feathered deliciously over the skin of your chest as he looked down at you. “It’s why I am asking you to tell me what you want me to do. I don’t want to become a danger to you.”

You raised your handle to cradle his cheek, wondering how in the world someone who looked like this could be a danger to you, however, you knew that there were much more dangerous games to play than the one you had played with him earlier.

Hoseok leaned into your touch as you spoke with a newfound sense of confidence in his words, an unfamiliar sense of reassurance filling you. “My safeword will be consent, then. And Hoseok? Ask me what I want and I will answer you.”

“Y/N.” He hovered over you to ghost his lips over yours. “What do you want me to do?”

You moved your hand from his cheek to tangle in his hair. “I want you to touch me.”

“Thank god.” Hoseok delivered a soft smack straight to your heat as he smothered you with his lips, the quick contact forcing a whimper to burst from you into his mouth. He was quick to smooth it with a caress of his fingers straight to your clit, shock subsiding into pleasure.

At this point, you’re drenched. Constantly flexing your walls around nothing had created an accumulation of your wetness between the lips of your pussy. Hoseok groaned when he began spreading it around your bundle of nerves.

“May I eat you out? Please?” He pulled his lips from yours and pressed his thumb to you, softly rubbing circles. Your thighs spasmed every so often.

“Yes, Hoseok, yes.” You wobbled. His lips and eyes, now visible, pulled into a grin as he lowered himself down your body.

Without warning, he pressed his face into you, tongue out and lips agape. Immediately, you brought your hands to his hair with a low, breathy groan building in your chest. He started with zero hesitation.

Hands holding you by your thighs, he licked once, then twice, and then shoved his tongue past your folds to slightly enter you. You couldn’t help the groan as it escaped you, tossing your head back and widening your legs for him. He removed one of his hands from your leg, realizing he didn’t need to do much to keep you pliant, and used it to spread your lips further apart.

Blissed out and not paying attention, you didn’t feel his eyes on you as he surveyed your body, growing dangerously hard as he watched you slowly rock yourself into him. Your breasts swayed just slightly with the movement and his hungry eyes struggled to capture your entire body all at once. Experimentally, he slid a finger into your heat, loving how one of your hands that was tangled in his hair yanked back to tangle into your own.

He dropped his tongue back to your clit as he watched your body, a beautiful instrument that he was playing to produce the most beautiful sounds he ever heard.

You were in complete bliss. Hoseok laved his tongue over you in rhythm with his finger as he began pumping you. You couldn’t think straight anymore. The texture of his tongue was slightly rougher than the fragile skin of your folds, sending you into a quivering mess as you felt it attack you with fervor.

It wasn’t long before you were approaching your first orgasm that Hoseok added a second finger, the feel of the stretch paired with his tongue truly exquisite. You were losing your mind if your wails of pleasure were any sign of that.

The knot that began forming in your lower belly had begun to pull your legs closed as it was pulled tighter with each stroke of Hoseok’s tongue and fingers.

“Hoseok-“ You moaned past your labored breaths, gasping aloud. “I think I’m-“

“Then cum on my face, little one. Give it to me.” He moaned with you, pumping his fingers into you with the pads dipping against that specific spongy spot within you.

To say your orgasm was glorious was a heavy understatement. Your legs clapped against the sides of his head, trapping his face against you as he pulled his fingers out, tongue pushing past your folds into your pussy to welcome the juices that rushed out of your tremoring walls. His lips sloppily locked with you as if in a heated french kiss, driving you to a babbling mess whilst you let your climax riddle your body into a trembling heap. Breathless and high with ecstasy, you felt the strokes of his tongue lick you up and assist your spasms of sensitivity.

“Fuck.” You croaked, staring up at the ceiling which you then noticed was graced with a large chandelier, the crystals twinkling in the moonlit room like stars. Hoseok moved over you again, obstructing your view with his face that glistened with your release.

“Y/N,” He whispered, voice almost straining. “What else do you want me to do?”

You took a moment to look down, noticing his considerable, weeping erection mere inches from touching your skin with a pearly bead of cum at the tip glinting at you teasingly. Your mouth watered despite your post-orgasm stupor. He’s fucking huge.

Your response was almost automatic and robotic as you lifted your eyes back to his.

“I want you to fuck me. Now.”

Hoseok was quick to kiss you again, groaning with relief while he lowered his body to yours. The sheen of sweat that covered your skin caused his to slightly stick to yours. The weight of his cock on your stomach and the taste of yourself on his lips only made you press your shaking body up to his in anticipation, locking your ankles around his back.

“Y/N,” He muttered in between his kisses. “You may call me Hobi if you’d like. My full name is a little difficult to scream coherently.”

“Hobi?” You tested the name on your tongue, distracted, before smiling at him. “I like it.”

“Very good. Use it as much as you’d like.” He smirked, reaching for his cock to rub it into your pussy lips, spreading them slightly so that it massaged your clit and folds. The halted groan that Hoseok choked down proved that the feel of you on his dick affected him just as much as the feel of his dick affected you. “You’re wet as fuck.”

“Only for you.” You moaned, widening your legs to allow him more room. You held your breath as he gripped himself and positioned.

Slowly, Hoseok entered you. You were wet and prepared enough that the stretch of his girth was only mildly uncomfortable- not painful. The hiss drawn in between his clenched and bared teeth made you bristle with pride as you were able to make him feel good.

You watched the way your bodies slid together, inch by magnificent inch. The sight overpowered any previous exhaustion you felt from the first orgasm. You became completely hyperaware from the way he had seemed to reach the end of you, stuffing you full, with a bit more of him still unsheathed. Dammit. You want to fit him all.

“Shit.” He spluttered and hiccuped, causing you to realize that he was holding his breath. “You’re tight.”

Gathering your legs up into his arms, he began fucking you just as you wished.

He began his pace brutally, hips snapping into yours with abandon and stunning precision. Despite wanting to watch him, your eyes couldn’t focus, constantly fighting the urge to roll to the back of your head. Your mouth dropped open in a silent scream as he leaned over and spread you wide.

“H-Hobi.” You sobbed. The sounds of your pussy slurping on Hoseok’s dick was ungodly, yet you couldn’t help but love the sound of him invading your depths with your body greedily taking him in.

You felt his cock deep within you as if he was pushing into your lungs with each surge of his body into yours. Could you breathe? You quickly determined that yes, you could breathe, because of the loud sounds that you made that were a mix of gasps and screams.

Sweat began dribbling down Hoseok’s forehead, gelled hair now damp and falling over his face into his eyes with a look of determined ecstasy plastered across his features. His eyes, accompanied by his drawn up eyebrows, focused in concentration on where your bodies met before scaling up the expanse of your bodies, locking on your breasts bouncing with the hammering force. Hoseok brought his hand down to rub circles into your clit so that he could watch you squirm even more.

Still sensitive from your first orgasm, the second came to you much quicker. With Hoseok grunting over you, his dick railing into your heat like a jackhammer, and the feel of just him, you were coming undone quickly. Grasping onto his neck with one hand and using the other to dig your nails into his back, you began caving in on yourself, unable to leave any muscle relaxed whilst your climax approached. Your legs tensed, heels digging into the globes of his ass to bring him on top of you.

“You really want my cum, don’t you?” He chuckled darkly, to which you only managed to nod and release a quick mhm. Hoseok’s growl in your ear only brought you closer. “I’m going to pump you full of my kids, little one. Just be patient.”

But being patient was impossible with the way he was in your guts and the fact that he had slowed his rhythm in exchange for more depth. Stroke after punishing stroke, you could feel his tip battering your cervix, the slight pain making for a dizzying sensation as it mixed with the onslaught of his thumb on your swollen nub. The concern that he could possibly get you pregnant was only an after thought as you were on the pill, but you had to admit that thinking about taking Hoseok’s seed straight into your womb was a sinfully pleasing idea.

He was much too deep; too far into the pits of your stomach for you to fathom how you had never been fucked this thoroughly before. You were going to fucking die. You were going to be killed if you didn’t stop it now. There was no way you wouldn’t come back begging for more if you didn’t stop now. He would own you because you would be obsessed- but he would want nothing to do with you come morning.

You desperately tried to escape him, legs digging into the mattress to push yourself away in order to gain some sense of mind, but you only crowded yourself further into the headboard with Hoseok following you, wrapped around you, on you, in you- everywhere. Hoseok delivered a solid smack straight to the underside of your ass, the ‘clap’ resonating through the room and mixing with the slurping sounds of your body eagerly pulling him in.

“Don’t you run from me, baby. Take it like a big girl.” He smiled devilishly whilst wrapping a hand around your neck, forcing your gaze to meet his. You sobbed loudly, clawing at his back in a fruitless attempt to detach him from your body. Hopelessly, you tried to press your hand to his stomach in an effort to push him away.

His grip tightened slightly on the sides of your neck, effectively leaving your airway unbothered yet the blood flow to your head stinted. “Move-” He thrust into you roughly, triggering a cry from your lips through the lightheaded feeling of being mildly strangled. “Your fucking hand.”

What was the damned safeword? Your thoughts were jumbled as you tried to remember it, yet you found yourself wondering why you were trying to remember when he wasn’t hurting you in the slightest. The ache in your cervix was an unholy and iniquitous sensation that you found yourself literally drooling out the side of your mouth for. You were fucking addicted to it.

“Hobi!” You cried, tears welling up in your eyes as you called for him. You couldn’t wait any longer. You were about to cum and nothing could stop it. “Hobi!”

“Cum on my dick, Y/N. That’s it. Swallow me up.” He muttered softly, aggression in his tone completely gone as he softened his hold on you in order to focus on ravishing your heat.

You brought him in one last time, body seizing and clawing for him as if you wanted to completely absorb him into yourself, before your orgasm exploded on you in the form of your juices rushing from your snatch around his girth. Mere moments after, before your orgasm was done climaxing, Hoseok came with a curse, pressing himself entirely inside you to spill his cum onto your abused cervix.

In the decrescendo of your orgasm, you found your mind and body unreservedly satisfied.

This man, Jung Hoseok, was a god- in the purest human form. Your entire world was shaken as he panted over you, sweat dripping down both of your bodies. It was no use trying to reason any other way that he had ruined you for any other man on the planet. You had gone through such a dry spell only to be welcomed back by him? You were going to be one spoiled brat if you ever hoped to bed another man again; you knew that, even as a one-night stand, there was no other like him.

With a sore, pulsing body and a slowly calming heart, you watched him as he removed himself from the bed. “Hold onto yourself for a second, will you?” He asked, bringing your hand down to stop his cum from leaking out of your depths. The touch of your fingers on your heat warranted a gasp of oversensitivity, causing him to smirk at you while he got up. He seemed to smile to himself as he mused, “Maybe next time.”

You watched him as he approached a set of doors in the dark, contemplating his words. Next time? My god, yes, please.

Reaching for a towel, you got a divine view of him from the back, perfectly muscular, and plump in the right areas. He looked as if he was sculpted by the Greeks themselves.

You tried to speak but your voice cracked into silence, making you clear your throat to try again. “There’s a next time?”

He turned around quickly with the dark towel in hand, stalking towards you. “If you desire one, that is.”

“Oh! I do very much…” You trailed off as you realized how fast you were to respond to his statement. You grew quiet in embarrassment. “… desire a… next time.” All Hoseok did was grin down at you, eyes flickering to your hold on your core. He was quick to help you clean his essence from your body while he chuckled.

“I guess I made a good impression on you?” He laughed lightly as you laid there, vulnerable and spread out before him in the glow of his aftercare.

“You could say that…” You blushed, turning to look out the window into the night, grateful that it was too dark for him to see the embarrassing flush.

“I hope I satisfied your needs, Y/N. Please tell me if I didn’t.” Hoseok turned serious, lightly placing his fingers on your arm in a feather-light caress so that you would look at him.

“No! No.” You were quick to jump in and assure him. “You were… amazing. The best I’ve ever had, in fact.”

“Really?” He asked whilst tossing the soiled towel to the floor. “And why do you say that?”

You shrunk under his gaze as he laid back in the bed with you, circling his arms around you to roll the two of you over to the side that wasn’t wet with your cum in the sheets. He wasn’t going to kick you out? No. Don’t jump to conclusions. He’s probably just trying to be nice. “Let’s just say that my past escapades were a little less than satisfactory.”

Hoseok sat with his elbow propping him up so that he could look down at you.

“Y/N,” His eyes turned concerned. “When was the last time you had a proper orgasm?”

Stupidly, you replied almost monotonously. “Uh… a few nights ago with my vibra-“

“No. No.” He chuckled, cutting you off. “I meant when was the last time someone else gave you a proper orgasm?”

“Oh, god.” You laughed. You raised your hands to cover your face. “Probably about… ten months ago? Give or take.”

“That explains the brattiness earlier.” He snickered. You only looked at him in confusion. 

He looked back at you, waiting for you to understand, but you were only drawing a blank. Hoseok looked down and grimaced in disdain, shaking his head slightly. With his free hand, he placed it on the side of your neck, thumb brushing your cheek delicately. “You haven’t been taken care of, little one. Would you like me to properly take care of you?”

Hoseok began to lightly trace patterns with his thumb while his eyes searched yours for an answer. Gulping, you nodded and breathed the word ‘yes.’ Are we about to go again?

“Good.” He said lowly, ghosting his lips over yours. Oh fuck, we’re going again. Your heartbeat skipped back into the race, accelerating in speed.

As quickly as he leaned into you, he pulled away and stood up. “We’ll start by getting something to eat because I’m hungry as fuck and I didn’t see you eat anything at the ball. What’re we feeling, McDonald’s?”

And good lord. If you weren’t addicted and stupidly in love then, you were now.

~#~

If you’d like to read more of my work, feel free to check out my Series Masterlist! If you’d like to read my first fic, check out the DHYB Masterlist!

[therealvalkyrie]

What Could’ve Been Without the War

Pairing/setting: Jean Kirschtein x Female!Reader, modern!AU within the Walls, set after the War; canon divergent w/ modern tech

Summary: You and Jean embark on your weekly trip to the grocery store.

Word Count: 2.2k

Warnings: equal parts angst and fluff, idiots to idiots, mutual pining, unsatisfying ending (i’m so sorry)

AN: Surprise Jean! I hope you are all having a wonderful Friday evening and that I don’t ruin it too much with angst. This piece started out as a super fluffy drabble involving grocery store shenanigans and kinda....uh....got away from me. Ahem. It was also originally intended as a 157 follower cool prime number thank you! I think we’re up to 180-something now, but we can still count it. Big thanks yet again to the love of my life @ghostlightprincess for her edits and encouragements:) Please come let me know what you think in my DMs/askbox/comments!!  ~valkyrie

Jean opens on the third knock on his apartment door, already shrugging on a jacket. He greets you with a short “hi” and receives the kiss you plant on his cheek out of habit.

“You ready?” You’re practically bouncing on the balls of your feet, car keys jingling off of the magenta key ring looped around your finger. It’s cute, and he finds himself matching your enthusiasm with a grin of his own.

“Almost,” he replies, reaching back to his coat rack to grab a scarf. “Honestly, I still don’t understand why you’re always so excited for the grocery store.”

He looks back to catch you rolling your eyes. “I don’t understand why you’re not. A grocery store is a magical place, with all of the cheesecake and ice cream you could ever wish for!”

He chuckles and joins you in the hallway, leaning down to lock his door behind him. “Need I remind you that you’re lactose intolerant?”

“That’s what Lactaid is for, stupid. Come on!” He lets you pull him down the hall, your small gloved hand in his big one. “Good afternoon, Mrs. Croft!” you greet his elderly neighbor as you pass her open door, sticking your head in with a wide smile. “You need anything from the store? Jean and I are just on our way.”

Jean stands beside you awkwardly, avoiding eye contact with his shrewd neighbor. You haven’t let go of his hand and he can feel a blush working its way up his neck. 

“No, that’s alright, honey, I just went this morning.”

“Okay! Well, let us know if you think of anything!”

“Thank you, dear.”

“Have a good afternoon, ma’am,” Jean chips in as you wave. 

“You kids have fun.”

The next second, you’re pulling him away again and he misses the way Mrs. Croft chuckles knowingly and looks back to her knitting. 

—

“What’s next on the list?” Your voice drifts down the aisle back to him, and Jean pauses in pushing the cart to shuffle the papers in his hands. 

“Umm… AP flour, vanilla extract,” shuffle, shuffle, “brown sugar, olive oil, yeast.”

You hum in acknowledgment and he watches as you flit from shelf to shelf, gathering items in your arms. He pushes the cart up to join you.

You dump everything in haphazardly, and he sighs, leaning down to straighten it all out into categories.

“What’s next?” You’re already halfway down the rest of the aisle again, gazing up longingly at the Oreos on the top shelf.

God, she’s cute.

He joins you, reaches up to pluck a pack of Double Stuf off of the shelf, and wordlessly places it in your section of the cart, suppressing a smile of his own as you grin up at him.

“You sure know how to treat a girl right, Jean-bo.” You reach up to ruffle his mullet. 

“Don’t call me that,” he grumbles, ducking away and flushing red like a smitten schoolboy. “Next is the frozen aisle.”

—

“Was it the lasagna that she liked last time? Or the shepherd’s pie?”

“The lasagna.” He accepts three frozen dinners as you pass them over from where you’re leaning past the glass freezer door.

“Hey,” he looks up sharply at your soft call to see you staring down the aisle like you’ve seen a ghost, hand still holding the glass door open. He follows your gaze and sees him just as you say, “It’s Erwin.”

It’s not, but Jean’s heart twists all the same at the resemblance the stranger carries. Same neatly parted blonde hair, broad shoulders. But he’s shorter, still has both arms. And he’s alive. 

“It’s not, sweetheart,” he murmurs, reaching to wrap an arm around your shoulders.

“It is, look he—” you insist until the man turns and instead of the Commander’s piercing blue gaze you’re met with brown eyes that flick between you and Jean in confusion. “Oh.” Your face falls and you allow the door to close, turning into Jean’s side.

“You alright?” He tilts his head to catch your expression. It’s pure pain, mouth twitching into a frown and eyes unfocused. Your hand comes up to grip the bottom of his jacket, and after a second he can see you physically force your face back to neutral. 

“Fine,” you nod. He knows you’re faking, that it’s a survival tactic, so he lets it go for now, only steps back to let you in between his body and the cart. 

“Up you go,” he prompts you to step up, feet on the bottom shelf and hands clutching the bar. He starts to push as you ride, walking first then running down the aisle until you finally throw your head back and laugh genuinely. 

He misses the exasperated look an employee gives him as the pair of you whizz past, too preoccupied with your smile.

—

“What do you need three dozen eggs for, anyway?” you ask incredulously, nevertheless opening each carton to inspect before handing them over. 

“They’re a good source of protein,” he defends. “Plus, you always end up running out and coming to me to complain. Ran me dry last time.”

Another playful eye roll. “It’s only ‘cause I messed up my brownies! And I needed them to entice the landlord to finally fix my heater.”

“Your heater’s been broken?”

“Well, it’s not anymore. Espresso brownies work wonders, I’ll have you know.”

You’re trying to brush it off as you normally do when he worries, but the thought of you shivering and blue-lipped keeps him pushing. “How long did you not have heat for? It’s February!”

“Not the point, Jean-bo!” You poke at his cheek and twirl away towards the cheese. 

“It definitely is the point. Come to me next time and I’ll fix it.”

“And lose my deposit?” You scoff, reaching for mozzarella. “Fat chance.”

“Freeze, then.”

You grin back at him. “Why d’you think I came over so much last weekend?”

“Is that all I am to you? A hot water bottle in your time of need?” He feigns hurt, but some pride swells in his chest that he kept you warm, after all. 

“And a cute one, at that. Think fast!”

His hand flashes up to catch the mozzarella you toss deftly. 

“You wound me.”

“Eh, builds character. What’s next?”

Shuffle, shuffle. “Wine and flowers.”

—

Jean watches as you bounce in the driver’s seat, hands almost dainty on the wheel, leaning forward to stare resolutely out the windshield at the darkening road. You’re singing along to some song he doesn’t know that’s playing from the stereo.

It’s so familiar, this Saturday evening ritual with you, and it wraps Jean up like the softest blanket. He knows why you’re always so excited about grocery shopping, and it’s not the cheesecake — it’s the way this routine has centered itself in both your lives. He feels it too, the semblance of normalcy, of domesticity, that you’ve cobbled together with him in between hard weeks and harder nights.

You navigate the bends and odd intersections of his old suburban neighborhood with ease, having driven to his house maybe thousands of times since you were teens. The elementary school passes, then the vet clinic, until finally, your old black sedan pulls into his mom’s driveway alongside her silver minivan.

You shift to neutral and yank on the parking brake habitually, then turn off the car and settle back into your seat.

You’re both quiet for a moment: you staring out the window lost in thought, Jean checking the time on his phone.

“Jean?”

“Hm?”

“Do you ever regret enlisting so young?” This catches his attention, turning sharply to look at your contemplative profile.

“Never. It was the right thing to do.” He’s resolute in this conviction, always. The War had seemed to be at its worst when you’d joined up, driven by the promise of Wall Maria’s reclamation and impassioned by your comrades’ fury. It had been the only choice, in his view.

“I do, sometimes,” you admit quietly, eyes downcast to where your fingers twist in your lap. “Maybe then my head wouldn’t be so messed up,” you laugh dryly and tap your temple, then shoot him a sideways glance. “And maybe—” you cut yourself off.

“Maybe what?”

“Never mind.” You’re out of the car so fast Jean almost questions if you moved at all. It reminds him of your natural grace on the ODM gear, how you’d whoop and holler as you hurtled past him among the trees during training. He wonders for a moment when your agility turned from a source of joy to an escape mechanism, then stops himself. He knows exactly when that happened.

—

The grocery store tulips thankfully survived their ordeal in the trunk of your car, bright against Ma Kirschtein’s tile kitchen backsplash as you arrange them in her favorite vase. After a minute of fussing, you take a step back, give a nod of satisfaction, and scoop up the trimmed stems off the counter. The rest of the groceries are already put away, organized so she can reach them without trouble.

It’s as you’re stepping on the trash can pedal to open its lid that the voices from the living room catch your ear. You pause, smiling as mother and son converse.

“Have you been eating enough, Jean-bo? You look so skinny….”

“Ma, I—”

“What am I saying, of course you haven’t. You’d waste away to nothing if you were left to your own devices. I’m so glad that darling girl is there to look after you.”

“Ma, she’s not my keeper—”

“When are you two getting married, again? I could’ve sworn I wrote it down in my book, but I looked the other day and couldn’t find the date anywhere.” She sounds serious. Confused, even, not a hint of teasing in her tone. Must be an off day. A symptom of her early-onset dementia.

“Ma, we’re not even together.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. You’ve been together since high school.” She’s so convinced, so sure, and you squeeze your eyes tight against the reality that you and Jean have only ever been friends. In the adolescent insecurity of high school, in the intensity of military training, in the fucking heat of battle, all you’ve ever shared is friendship.

“Ma, I don’t think… I don’t even think she—” He pauses and your ears strain in the silence to catch his last quiet phrase. “She doesn’t think of me that way.”

You just know, you can tell, he only says it like that to ease her confusion. It’s the opposite, really, he doesn’t think of you that way. Before you can hear more sideways rejection, you toss the flower stems and make a beeline for the bathroom.

—

“What was that movie you were telling me to watch, again?” You ask around a mouthful of spaghetti with sauce fresh from the jar, covering your mouth with one hand.

The pair of you are eating shoulder-to-shoulder on the floor of your apartment two floors above Jean’s. It’s got the decidedly better view out your picture window, complete with the perfect Eastern perspective of the river that cuts through Trost and its famous bridges. It’s this, the third leg of your traditional Saturday evenings together, that makes you feel the most warm.

Jean has the manners to chew and swallow before replying. “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood? Connie, Sasha, and I went to see it when they visited last month—”

Your snicker cuts him off and he raises his eyebrows as you roll your eyes and take a sip of wine. “The feet movie? Sasha said it was pretentious.”

“Really? I thought she was too preoccupied with the fact that the theater sold chili fries to pay attention.” He teases back, twirling more pasta onto his fork.

“I’m telling her you said that,” you warn with a jab of your own fork in his direction.

“Snitch.”

“Hey!”

He ducks to avoid your swat to the back of his head, grinning at your pout. “No, but seriously, apart from the feet it’s a good movie.”

“Hmm. I’ll consider putting it on the roster for next week.”

You take a moment to relish the comfortable silence, looking out at the city lights as you chew thoughtfully. His thigh is heavy and warm against yours under the thick knitted blanket his mom gave you last Yule. Your belly is warm and full, your shoulders relaxed in the company of your closest friend, your lungs breathing easily.

Jean says your name quietly and you turn to see him staring pensively down at the plate in his lap. “About what you asked earlier… in the car?”

You nod, eyes wide and mouth serious.

“Sometimes… I do regret it.” He grits the words out through his teeth, like it’s difficult to force the truth into the world. “Not because I regret what we did in the War. But because sometimes I wonder,” his eyes cut to yours for a split second, “I wonder what could’ve been. Without the War.”

You don’t say anything, don’t say you understand, because you know he knows. Instead, you loop your arm into his and lean your head against his shoulder. It takes a moment, a release of breath and the fall of his chest, but eventually he closes his eyes, turns his face into your hair, and allows himself to sink into the what could’ve been. Just for now.

[hoebii]

Like me better

Pairing : Park Jimin x Reader

Genre : Fluff, Highschool!Au, e2l, rivals

Rating : PG13

Warning : ‘Curse’ words are mentioned (is ‘shit’ even a curse word fhgjv), OC wanting to choke Jimin and not in the kinky way, brief mention of Jimin being a playboy thot, hating on mint chocolate because it’s the worst flavour to exist you can fight me on this

Wc : 4k

A/N : Alright, this was originally supposed to be a birthday drabble but it got a little out of hand as you can see. We had a whole lot planned for this fic but it got too long oops- so we decided to cut it short and keep the ending open huhu. Happiest birthday to our precious maknae @heejinnien​ from @xiaokoo​ (who also made this AMAZING banner btw) and I. Hope you like your present baby! We love you so so so much~<3 Also this isn’t as edited as I’d like it to be but I got impatient okay don’t @ me :<

----------------

The bustling crowd of students bumped into you repeatedly as you weaved through them to get to class. You kept a strong grip on your books so as to not drop them. People squeezed passed as you tried not to trip and fall flat on your face. You had slept through your alarms and were currently rushing to your class, cursing at yourself for this blunder in your head. 

“Sorry, excuse me, oh shit!” You catch yourself as you tumbled to the ground. Your books splay across the floor as you winced at the sore feeling. Hopefully, no one would step on you or your books - you had paid good money for them!-. As for tripping over, you looked over your shoulder, glaring when you caught sight of a group of boys laughing. 

“Aw is little princess hurt?~” You heard one of them call out, the others snickering in the background. You ignored them and started gathering all your books, telling yourself they weren’t worth the trouble. You were almost done picking up all the books on the ground when one was suddenly snatched from your grasp. Looking up at the culprit you see Park Jimin, the bane of your existence, holding it up.

“Are you sure you even need books?” He snickers, flicking through it. “You’re not even smart, why bother studying if it doesn’t do you any good?” 

You feel your blood boil. How dare he?! You were smarter than him in every possible way. He had no right to mock you, sure he was smart but you always placed second. If there was one thing you hated, it was being second best to Park Jimin. 

“You’ll just come second like always.” 

That comment hit you hard. You tried to keep your cool, resisting the urge to punch him in the face. Sure, Jimin was annoying but there was no way you were going to create a scene because of it. Not again. Instead, you rolled your eyes, choosing to ignore him and walked away. There would be no reason to argue with a dumbass. Why waste your time?

Jimin watched as you walked away. He smirked to himself. Despite acting calm, he’d known you long enough to know that you were fuming inside. There were buttons he knew how to push to get the reaction he wanted and he thoroughly enjoyed provoking you. 

--------

You stumbled into the classroom, panting from the light jog. “Damn I need to get back in shape, Jesus Christ.” you whispered to yourself. 

“Miss Y/L/N, care to explain why you’re five minutes late to the class?” Your professor’s voice boomed in the small classroom. You look at him, giving him a sheepish smile as you rub your neck. 

“I… got lost…?” 

What was that?! You wanted to smack yourself at your own words. So much for your perfect attendance. 

“You got lost?”

“Y...es…”

Your professor took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Just, just go to your seat.”

You scurried to your seat, setting down your books and sitting down. You heard snickering from beside you and you turned your head slightly towards the sound to see none other than Park Jimin laughing at you. Feeling your face flush in embarrassment, you turned towards your professor and started jotting down notes. You were not going to get riled up by Jimin during a class. 

-----------

It’s official. Life hates you. You must have been some sort of a witch in your last life who thrived by torturing others. That had to be it. Why else would you ever get partnered with Park freaking Jimin for your science project?! Apparently, the professor had said it was because you two were ‘top students that will compliment each other well’. But you’re certain it was actually because she hated you and you must have tortured her or something in your past life and this was her way of getting revenge. You’re pretty sure you came up with at least 7 ways to end Park Jimin in the time he took to move his seat closer to you for ‘discussing details about the project.’ 

“So you’re gonna draw the diagram and write everything,” Jimin started as soon as he sat down. He dumped his bags to one corner taking out the necessities. “I will be supervising you as I’m clearly the better one here.”

Oh how much you craved to just lean forward and wrap your fingers around his neck and choke him. How can a person be this insufferable? You could just shove a damn pen up his- 

“Alright class dismissed! Remember, the deadline is on Monday next week! Have a nice weekend.” Your professor announced, snapping you out of your thoughts.  

“I’ll see you tomorrow then, don’t screw up the project.” 

With that Jimin left you sitting there fuming at him. You let out a tired sigh and begin packing up to leave too, mind running wild. Why couldn’t Jimin just be a good person for once?

-------------

The weekend seemed to go by in a flash, just you working on the project with Jimin, who had surprisingly been quite helpful. Just when you thought he had a heart, he had said it was ‘so you don’t ruin my grades.’ Yeah nevermind he still sucks.

What you didn’t know was Jimin being nice - well as nice as a jerk can get anyway - was because he had a bet to win. One of the boys had proposed a bet after class when he caught Jimin bickering with you yet again. The bet was simple really, ask you out and date you for a while before leaving you. Jimin had refused at first but then everyone started taunting him. Who liked getting mocked? No one. It was plain simple anyways, no one would actually get hurt, wasn’t like you liked him. So he accepted.

It wasn’t easy to catch your attention, given the fact the both of you were mortal enemies, it was near impossible. He did everything in his power so you would look at him but all tactics had somehow managed to flop. There was only one other way of actually getting you to notice him and that was annoying you. However, that would ruin the whole point of the bet. 

“Y/n, Y/n, Y/n.” Jimin chanted as he poked you on the cheek incessantly. “Y/n pay attention to meeee.” He continued to whine. 

You felt your right eye twitch. Why was this dumbass bothering you?! There was no reason for him to even be five feet close to you. 

“What is it Jimin?” You turn to him, a sickly sweet smile on your face. “What is so important that you’re trying to talk to me?”

Jimin grinned, his eyes turning into crescents as he poked his cheek and gave a wink. “Hi~ How are you doing?”  

Is he for real right now? Did he think he was cute? You felt like throwing up. “Park what are you up to? You never act,” you started, eyes squinting in suspicion, “like whatever you’re doing right now.” 

Jimin gasped and placed a hand on his chest as if in pain before exclaiming, “What?! Me? Up to something? Impossible, I’m as innocent as an angel.” 

An angel? More like a devil. There was no way he was telling the truth. You’d known him long enough and not once in your life had he treated you with such...whatever that emotion was.

“Right. An angel. Okay.” You nodded.

“Do you not believe me? You can ask anyone on this campus and they would tell you how amazing I am.” He gestured his hands wildly. 

You scoffed at that, of course they would, he had slept with the majority and had the remaining wrapped around his tiny fingers. Plus, no one wanted to cross Park Jimin. He ruled the campus and everyone knew it. 

“Listen, just get to the point. I don’t have time for this nonsense.” You said, rolling your eyes and huffing. You had to get to your next class in about five minutes. There was no way you were going to be late because some idiot was bothering you. 

“Go on a date with me.”

You choked on air at that, did you hear that right? “E-excuse me what?!”

Jimin shrugged and crossed his hands, flexing slightly, “You heard me, go on a date with me this weekend. Heard there's a new ice cream shop here, we could go there.” 

“You want to take me on a date?” You look at him skeptically. Was this a test? Were you being filmed? “You’re joking.”

“No.” He fixed you with a stare. “I’m serious. One date, if you don’t enjoy that one date, I promise I won't bother you ever again.”

You stood there staring at him, alarm bells ringing in your head. This can’t be real. He’s lying. “You? Never bothering me ever again? That’s like saying you don’t sleep with everyone you meet.”

“I didn’t sleep with you.”

“That’s different!” You exclaimed, face flushing. “You hate me!”

Jimin tilted his head, his nose scrunching up. “I never said I hate you.” You open your mouth ready to retaliate. “You simply assumed I did, my actions don’t mean anything unless I say something.”

You stood speechless. There had to be one occasion where he had stated he hated you. One. You searched your brain. Sure enough there was no such memory. 

Not wanting to lose to Jimin nonetheless you stomped your feet and said, “Yeah well that makes no sense! Haven’t you heard ‘actions speak louder than words’? I thought you were smart” You tsked, shaking your head as if you were disappointed.

“But I’m standing here asking you out, I’m sure that counters all the things I’ve done to you.” He gives you a sly smirk, one you’re all too familiar with. “There’s really two options Y/n. One’s yes and the other is...yes. Which one do you choose?”

If you could you would have burned him to a crisp with your glare. Unfortunately, you hadn’t been gifted with laser vision like superman. It would have been quite a gift if you had. Imagine how peaceful life would be without Park Jimin judging your every move. Then again, you would miss him. Wait what?! You shook your head to clear your mind before looking at Jimin.

“No.”

Jimin’s eyes widened as he spluttered. “W-what do you mean no?!”

“N-O. No. Don’t tell me you forgot basic english.”

Jimin clicked his tongue in annoyance, glaring at you. No one had ever turned him down. Whatever Park Jimin wants he gets. Right now he wants you. 

“Why not?” 

You gave him a look. “Well, it isn’t exactly a secret that you sleep with anything that has two legs. I don't even know why you’re asking me out, you never go on dates.”

“That's because you’re different.”

You scoff. “Listen Park, this isn’t some shitty rom com that you can charm your way to my heart, this is reality and I’m smart enough to realise how much of a jerk you actually are.”

Words seemed to die in Jimin’s throat. A jerk?! Sure, he annoyed you but he didn't think he deserved the title of a jerk. If it wasn’t for that stupid bet he wouldn’t even be asking you out. There was no reason why you couldn’t go on just one date with him. It wasn’t as if he was asking you to juggle swords and then swallow them. Besides, Jimin was a very attractive person and he knew it too. What’s so bad about going out with him? You should feel blessed he was even asking you out in the first place!

“Just say yes already woman. One date won’t kill you,” Jimin groaned out, throwing his head back in frustration.

“One date with you will.”

You stared at each other, no one making a single move. The silence stretched on for a moment before Jimin sighed loudly and ran a hand through this hair. 

“Come on!”

“No”

“...Please?” Jimin couldn’t believe he had to beg. He never begs! The things he does for a stupid bet.

Rolling your eyes at Jimin, you sigh, “Fine. We can go there this Saturday.”

“I begged, why won’t you just accep--” Jimin started before cutting himself off, “Oh you said yes. Um, well, yeah ok.” He mumbled, trying to fix his composure. “Yeah see you there or something. Bye,” and with that he walked away, leaving you both amused and confused… and also late for class! Damn Park Jimin.

-----------

You stood in front of the ice cream shop waiting for Jimin to show up. He was late, but then again what were you expecting anyway? You rolled your eyes as you looked around, “If he doesn’t show up in the next minute, I’m leaving.” you mumbled to yourself, checking your watch for what felt like the umpteenth time. 

“Y/n!” A voice shouted from behind causing you to turn around. Jimin ran towards you, panting slightly. “Sorry, I had to run all the way here.”

“Did you forget about the date or were you just being a jerk and were late intentionally?”

His face flushed pink, avoiding your gaze. “I might have forgotten but that wasn’t completely my fault, I just lost track of time.”

“Yeah whatever.” 

Jimin went to hold open the door for you but you beat him to it, opening it for yourself and slamming it in his face. He held back the urge to leave right there. A bet needed to be completed. He followed you inside trying to strike a conversation with you, trying to get just a crack of a smile.

“So Y/n, how’s your day?” Jimin asked, giving you a sweet smile that would have anyone swooning but it had no effect on you. 

“It would be good if the one who asked me out on a date came on time.” You didn’t look at him, instead you were staring intently at the menu. 

Jimin bit his tongue to stop himself from saying something he would regret, giving you a tight lipped smile. “I’m sure your date regrets being late.” ‘And asking you out in the first place’ Jimin thought the last part but didn’t say out loud.

“Doubt it.” You shrugged. 

Jimin knew what you were doing. You were specifically trying to provoke him, there was no way that he would ask you out on a date voluntarily. You were trying to gouge out any secrets he was hiding. His job, obviously, was to try and not let you find out those secrets. There was no way you were going to cooperate if he told you about the bet. 

The two of you knew each other since you were both babies, your mothers knew each other and would always coo at ‘how cute these two will look together.’ Unfortunately for them though, since you were both young the two of you had some sort of competition going on. Didn't matter if it was who was smarter, who was faster or who could fit the most grapes in their mouth, the both of you were always competing. 

As you both grew older the bickering turned into bullying on his part. In truth, you actually didn't know what started this long feud, all you remembered was one day when you were five an annoying boy yanked your hair so hard that a few strands had come out. Annoying boy turned out to be Park Jimin and the two of you haven’t stopped arguing since. 

“What flavour are you getting?” Jimin peered over your shoulder. He looked at you expectedly. “I’ve already chosen mine, so it’s just up to you and I’ll pay.” He holds his wallet out. 

“Vanilla.” You said plainly.

“What?!” 

You turn to face Jimin, frowning. “What’s wrong with vanilla?”

He makes a face. “Y/n, it’s so boring, like you no doubt.” The last part had slipped out accidentally and he regretted it as soon as it left his mouth. That was it. You were going to scream at him and he would lose the bet.

Instead, you ignored his comment fixing your gaze back onto the menu. “What do you think I should get then? I’ll give you the choice, assuming you don’t pick a disgusting flavour like mint chocolate chip, I’ll be fine.” 

Sure, it was a stupid decision giving Jimin the power to pick what you were going to eat, but what could go wrong? Worst case scenario, you didn't like the flavour and he would be forced to go get a new one, which would cost him more money. It’s a win win. 

“You’re giving me the freedom to pick what flavour you’re having?” Jimin asked, making sure he didn't misunderstand your statement. You simply nodded, shrugging nonchalantly. 

“Yep” you replied when he stared at you for a while longer, popping the p.

Jimin smirked. “I’ll get you the best flavour to ever exist then.”

You raised an eyebrow at his statement, “Oh?”

“Yeah, mint chocolate~” 

You stared at him in disgust, scowling as you said, “Dude I just said that flavour is disgusting. Made by the devil himself.”

Jimin tapped his chin, as if he had no clue about you were saying, “Did you really? Can’t recall anything like that. Hmm.”

“Park Jimin, I swear to god if you get me that flavour I will rip your eyeballs out and shove them up your ass.”

“So you wanna touch my ass now?” He grinned smugly. You felt your cheeks heat up as you spluttered, desperately searching for a comeback.

“Just- just get me whatever you’re having. Unless it’s chocolate mint, then get out of my sight right now.” 

“Don't worry, I hate the flavour as much as you do. So, two birthday cakes coming right up.” You try to find ‘birthday cake’ on the menu. 

“Dude, the thing looks like a unicorn just threw up on it.” 

Jimin shoots you a glare. “Don’t disrespect the superior flavour bestowed upon us by the ice cream Gods.” You gape at him open-mouthed. Ice cream Gods?! The guy was insane. You were on a date with a guy who was insane. Rest in pepperoni to you.

“You’re insane,” You shake your head. “I’ll be waiting over there. Be quick.” You point to a table in the corner. 

“Yes ma’am” Jimin saluted before going to order at the counter. You shake your head. You’d known Jimin of most of your life and he’d always been silly and annoying. 

Some reason you knew a lot about him. You blamed it on your parents making you spend too much time with each other when you were younger. Also you needed to know every little thing about your mortal enemy, wasn’t that what mortal enemies did? You had to be prepared for anything and keep track of them at all times!

“Got your ice cream.” Jimin placed the cup in front of you as you stared at it with distaste. You’d never really had ice cream often but when you did you always went for the plain vanilla. It was simple, no need for toppings or colourful flavours. You weren’t one to take risks. 

“What monstrosity did you get for me, Park?” 

“Oh stop being a baby, it’s just strawberry with some syrup on it.” Jimin answered while he rolled his eyes, lips tugged up into a small smile. Eyes twinkling with adoration as he looked at you. 

“I’m not eating it.”

“Oh yes you are. Here comes the airplane!” Jimin started, taking a spoonful of the ice cream and moving it towards your face as if talking to a child. 

“I’m not a kid. I’m not ha-” Jimin shoves the spoon inside your mouth when you open it to retaliate, his lips lifted into a sly smile. You snatch the spoon off him while glaring at him and start feeding yourself. “Don’t patronise me, you jerk.” You grumbled.

Jimin almost cooed out loud at your pout but he barely controlled himself. Since when were you this cute? He watched as you ate.

“Is it good?” 

“...yes” You reluctantly answered, still pouting.

Jimin smiled, leaning back on his chair as he pat himself on his shoulder. “Another job done well by yours truly.”

You rolled your eyes. Then you noticed that Jimin’s ice cream looked slightly different to yours. It wouldn’t hurt to ask for a bite. Would it?

“What’s on yours?” Jimin looked up, the tiny spoon still in his mouth. “What’s on your ice cream?”

“Just extra sprinkles and chocolate sauce, nothing too special.” He shrugged, continuing to devour his dessert. You stare at your cup and then at his. Something must have been possessing you because before you knew it you were leaning over and digging your spoon into his cup.

“Hey, you can’t just do that!”

“Pretty sure I just did.” You popped the spoon into your mouth, savouring the taste. “You know you really weren’t kidding when you said this was good. For once, you did something right, congrats dude.” 

Jimin would have made a snarky comment but the look of pure ecstasy on your face stopped him. Even though he knew you for most of his life, there were parts you kept hidden. He knew you didn’t get out much, constantly studying was the only thing you seemed to do. A nice feeling bubbled inside of him. It was nice to know you were enjoying yourself, made him feel happy for some reason. 

You giggled, shoving more of the sweet dessert into your mouth. Too busy to notice that Jimin was staring at you. When you did, you gave him a look of confusion.

“What’s wrong?”

“You got a little something here.” He pointed to the left side of his face, holding in the urge to laugh at your cute expression. “No here, no.” He leaned over brushing his thumb over the corner of your lips. He stared at you, had your eyes always been so pretty? You felt yourself grow red at the close proximity between you two, not knowing what to do. Jimin leaned away, - why did your heart sink at that? - and licked his thumb. “Love this flavour.”

You avert your eyes quickly, blush getting brighter. You should not have found that as hot as you did. Get yourself together Y/N! Park Jimin, enemy number one! Nothing he does is mildly attractive. Nothing. He is the devil reincarnated!

Suddenly your phone started ringing, shattering whatever moment you two had going on. You picked up the device and checked the caller ID. Why was Jungkook calling now? You gave Jimin a sheepish look.

“Hello? I’m out. No. What? How did you- Alright alright.” Jimin watched as you spoke on your phone. 

You sighed in annoyance, hanging up after a while and giving Jimin a sheepish smile, “I need to go. Jungkook somehow made the microwave catch on fire.” 

Jimin raised his eyebrows in shock, looking at you as if you had grown two more heads. “What? How is that even possible?”

“Not a clue but I gotta dip. Thank you for inviting me here today. I still think you’re up to something though but whatever.” You spoke, getting up from your seat and grabbing your small messenger bag that you brought along. 

Jimin stood up alongside you, the both of you walking out of the shop and stopping on the sidewalk. “Yeah… Thank you for coming here with me.”

You two stood there staring at each other, not wanting to leave just yet. 

“Well then! I’ll see you on Monday. Bye Jimin,” You announced after a while, quickly pressing a small kiss on his cheek before dashing away. 

Jimin stood there in shock, hands raising to touch where you kissed him. Why was his heart racing so fast and why did he feel so warm inside? 

“Huh.. maybe you’re not so bad Y/L/N” Jimin spoke up to himself before he too started his walk back home, mind filled with thoughts of you.

[tigerkirby215]

5e Akshan, the Rogue Sentinel build (League of Legends)

(Artwork made for League of Legends by Riot Games.)

HE’S HERE HE’S HERE HESHEREHESHEREHESHEREHESHEREHESHEREHESHERE...

It’s no secret I’ve been excited for Akshan since he was first announced; the prospect of a grappling hook champ was simply too interesting for me. Seeing him now... I’m having slight reservations? I really dislike his Scoundrel mechanic (who had “bring back Garen Villain mechanic” and “revival mechanic” on their 200 years Bingo card?) and I kinda wish the grappling hook was incorporated more into his kit but... he still seems fun? It looks like he plays like a Twitch with more of an assassin focus, and Twitch has always been a fun character. I’m probably not buying him immediately on release but I’ll grab him when he drops down to a standardized price.

But anyways I’m here to build funny grappling hook man! ...Without his grappling hook. Look I’m going to tell you right now that while there is a grappling hook in 5e there’s little way to get a grappling hook gun like Akshan has, and while I’ll do my best to provide options in this build don’t get your hopes up. If that’s enough to make you lose interest in the build I’m sorry, but I do hope you stick around to read it anyways.

GOALS

Reclaimed by the light, yade yade yada... - Reviving people in real life is hard. Reviving people in League of Legends is a little easier. Reviving people in D&D though? Pretty easy.

Stealth time! I mean, stealth time...! - You will never guess what class the character with “Rogue” in their title is.

Only one way out of this mess; skyward! - Like I said I unfortunately can’t give you a grappling hook... gun. I can still give you the grappling hook item, and ways to climb out of dangerous situations!

RACE

Akshan is human according to the lore, so feel free to leave your complaints about Variant Human at the door. You can put +1 into your Strength and Dexterity for super Akshan action! You can also grab proficiency with the Persuasion skill (because how can you say no to that smile?) and whatever language would fit as Shuriman.

Of course Variant Humans get to grab a feat at level 1, and hello Crossbow Expert my old friend! Get that double-shot passive in while also fighting up-close and dirty. Oh and not needing to reload is obviously nice.

ABILITY SCORES

15; DEXTERITY - You’re still a marksman, which of course means Dexterity for shooting.

14; CHARISMA - You fight with a roguish charm. Rules are more like guidelines really, and why follow rules if they ruin your style?

13; STRENGTH - You need strength to throw grappling hooks if your DM doesn’t give you a proper grappling hook gun. Also carrying reobtained loot from warlords is nice.

12; CONSTITUTION - Even if you’re a squishy marksman / assassin having health is still a good thing.

10; WISDOM - You picked a few too many fights with bad people, but you’ve still got a good heart.

8; INTELLIGENCE - Grappling hooks are cool and all but attaching a grappling hook to an ancient relic used to vanquish a prophesized evil isn’t the brightest plan, and ignoring that prophesized evil for your own personal vengeance quest isn’t a good idea either.

Feel free to swap Strength and Constitution if you want better health but worse grappling hook tosses.

BACKGROUND

Akshan was an Urchin before being saved by Shadya. You get proficiency with Stealth and Slight of Hand as well as some tools, but I’d honestly suggest replacing them with Jeweler's Tools and Leatherworker’s Tools to keep your outfit in check. (Mostly because you get Thieves’ Tools from your class and won’t need a Disguise Kit.)

As a Shuriman kid you know all of the City Secrets. When you are not in combat, you can lead your allies through the city twice as fast as your speed would normally allow. Being a street kid does give you some valuable knowledge!

(Artwork made for Legends of Runeterra by Riot Games.)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - ROGUE 1

Wow who would’ve guessed the character with “Rogue” in their title is a Rogue?! As a Rogue you get proficiency in Acrobatics, Athletics, Insight, and Deception. But feel free to swap it up to make your own Akshan! You can also get Expertise in Acrobatics for rope-swinging tricks, and Stealth to hunt down scoundrels!

When you find the scoundrels deliver swift Comeuppance with a Sneak Attack! If you have advantage or fight dirty with an ally near the enemy you can do an extra d6 of damage with your shot! And to top it off you’ve spent enough times in the streets of Shurima to know how scoundrels talk and can use Thieves’ Cant to trick them that you’re one of them, or can listen to scoundrels talking to know when to stop them.

LEVEL 2 - ROGUE 2

Second level Rogues can opt not to attack and instead use a Cunning Action to Dash, Disengage, or Hide as a Bonus Action. “To the shadows; where the scoundrels hide!”

LEVEL 3 - ROGUE 3

Third level Rogues get to choose their Roguish Archetype, and to get the ability to swing around on ropes the Thief is about as good as you’re going to get. That’s because Second-Story Work makes it so climbing ropes doesn’t cost extra movement, and also lets you jump further if you have a running start. In addition you have Fast Hands, allowing you to use your Cunning Action to make a Sleight of Hand check, use your thieves’ tools to disarm a trap or open a lock, or take the “Use an Object” action.

Now here’s the thing about using your grappling hook: most DMs would consider throwing a Grappling Hook to be a “Use an Object” action. So as a Bonus Action you can throw your grappling hook and then use your climbing speed to climb up the rope, as if you were grappling upwards! Of course talk to your DM if that’s okay, but if they let it happen you’ve practically got a flying speed at level 3! As long as there’s walls to grapple on, at least. “Akshan, away!”

And to top it off your Sneak Attack also increase to 2d6.

LEVEL 4 - ROGUE 4

Feel free to skip your first ASI if you want some Sentinel abilities first, but I consider Dexterity more important for a Rogue. More shooting, more AC, and better stealth!

(Artwork made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 5 - WARLOCK 1

The Light Sentinels are a powerful, ancient entity who gave you powers in exchange for a set of rules. Just because the one who signed you up is dead and you don’t really follow the rules doesn’t mean you can’t still use their powers! But truthfully I just wanted a Charisma caster and you all know how much I love Warlock. Naturally powers against darkness and undead would be Celestial in nature! While you normally use The Absolver’s Healing Light to revive people healing is also useful. You have a pool of d6s equal to your Warlock level plus one. As a bonus action you can heal a creature you can see within 60 feet of you, spending dice from the pool. The maximum number of dice you can spend at once equals your Charisma modifier. Roll the dice you spend, add them together, and restore a number of hit points equal to the total. You regain all expended dice when you finish a long rest.

In addition as a Celestial Warlock you get Bonus Cantrips like the Light cantrip to see with your dumb human eyes as well as Sacred Flame cantrip to deliver Comeuppance! And of course to get cantrips you also get Pact Magic! You learn two cantrips from the Warlock list like Prestidigitation to be cool and flashy, and Mage Hand which can help you with your... legitimate business.

You can also learn two first level spells like Guiding Bolt and Cure Wounds, straight from the Celestial List! Mark a foe as a scoundrel and keep your friends alive and well! “Go; and die no more.”

LEVEL 6 - WARLOCK 2

Second level Warlocks get Eldritch Invocations: normally you get two but we’re only going to take one for now. But which one? Mage Armor is the best AC you’re going to get until you get magic armor which means that Armor of Shadows could be good, but Mask of Many Faces will let you choose your outfits however you please, and keep them from getting dirty! Basically I’m leaving you with a choice: if you want better AC but worse infiltration go for Armor of Shadows. Alternatively if you want the ability to sneak around in plain sight then Mask of Many Faces is a good choice for you!

You could also learn another Warlock spell but we’re going to wait for...

LEVEL 7 - WARLOCK 3

Third level Warlocks get their Pact Boon, and while the Absolver isn’t quite a “blade” Pact of the Blade is still the boon related to using cool ancient relic weapons! If you want to upgrade Pact of the Blade into “Pact of the Blade and also Sentinel Weapons” take Improved Pact Weapon.

Now here’s where I’m going to have to tell you to homebrew with your DM a little: for whatever reason Improved Pact Weapon lets you summon a shortbow, longbow, light crossbow, or heavy crossbow. Notice that there’s no Hand Crossbow on that list. This (technically) means that you can’t summon a Hand Crossbow, even if you take the Invocation tax for Improved Pact Weapon. Pact of the Blade does let you bind to any weapon... as long as its magical, and the lowest level magical Hand Crossbow you can get is either a +1 Hand Crossbow or a Crossbow of Warning. (Both good items to have but not necessarily something you’ll find in your adventures.) In short the official rules don’t let you have a Hand Crossbow.

Honestly I see no reason why you can’t have a Pact Hand Crossbow, but if your DM’s a stickler about it you can survive with either a Heavy Crossbow or a Longbow. (Depending on your preference.) If your DM doesn’t allow you to use a Hand Crossbow take Sharpshooter as your level 1 feat instead of Crossbow Expert, as you’ll get more use out of it.

tl;dr talk to your DM about letting Improved Pact Weapon let you summon a Hand Crossbow. If they say no edit the build with that in mind.

Anyways you can also learn more spells like Invisibility to sneak around, and Misty Step for good ol’ Flash.

LEVEL 8 - WARLOCK 4

4th level Warlocks can get an Ability Score Improvement... or a Feat! It would be easier just to grab Eldritch Adept now and talk about which Invocation you’ll use it for next level.

You can prepare another spell at this level at least, and also learn another cantrip! For your cantrip Minor Illusion can be used to make distractions while sneaking, and Mirror Image is a good spell to keep alive.

There are other spells you can take instead if you so desire. Lesser Restoration from the Celestial list is never bad to have, and Darkness can be used as a Smoke Bomb which you can’t see through with your dumb human eyes. And of course there’s the obviously good spells like Hold Person or Shatter. I’m trying to build what’s most accurate to Akshan, as well as what I believe would be the most useful. Feel free to change the build as you wish.

LEVEL 9 - WARLOCK 5

5th level Warlocks get more invocations like Thirsting Blade for a bit more attack speed with your Absolver. You can also cash in that Eldritch Adept Invocation to take One With Shadows, to hide in the shade of a wall until it’s time to surprise your foes! “That’s right; it is I!”

And finally we’ve got our revive! Take Revivify to bring someone back from the dead, as long as it was fairly recent. And the best part is you don’t even need to kill the person who killed them! But you will need a lot of diamonds, which can get expensive. “Dear friends: please stop dying. Love, Akshan.”

There’s several other third level spells you could potentially take (notably Thunder Step which might be a good replacement for Misty Step if you don’t mind throwing stealth out the window) but it’s up to you to take them.

(Artwork by @Tsvetyaa on Twitter.)

LEVEL 10 - ROGUE 5

Now that you’ve got the Sentinel part down it’s time to hone your Roguish skills! 5th level Rogues can use their reaction for an Uncanny Dodge, halving the damage from an attack they saw coming. In addition your Sneak Attack increases to 3d6.

LEVEL 11 - ROGUE 6

6th level Rogues get Expertise in two more skills: Deception and Persuasion would be useful to charm your way out of danger.

LEVEL 12 - ROGUE 7

7th level Rogues can swing out of danger with Evasion: if you make a Dexterity saving throw and succeed, you take no damage! And even if you fail you only take half damage! Oh and your Sneak Attack is now 4d6. “Consider yourself, absolved.”

LEVEL 13 - ROGUE 8

8th level Rogues get an Ability Score Improvement: let’s cap off that Dexterity to be the best shot you can be!

(Artwork made for League of Legends by Riot Games.)

LEVEL 14 - ROGUE 9

9th level Thief Rogues can never be found as long as they’re careful. Supreme Sneak gives you advantage on Stealth checks if you move no more than half your speed on your turn. This has insane synergy with One With Shadows as you can turn invisible and then get advantage on stealth (because for some reason being invisible doesn’t do that.) And of course if you go slow and steady you can sneak around just about anything, which is great for when you pop out to do 5d6 Sneak Attack damage! “Ha! I have you now!”

LEVEL 15 - ROGUE 10

Rogues get a few extra Ability Score Improvements... one extra, to be precise. But that means you can bump up your Charisma to be better at socialization and all that Warlock stuff.

LEVEL 16 - ROGUE 11

11th level Rogues get Reliable Talent, meaning the lowest you can roll on a skill you’re proficient in is 10. I always like to go through your skills when you get this ability to show what the bare minimum you can roll is, so...

27 on Acrobatics or Stealth

25 on Deception or Persuasion

21 on Slight of Hand

18 on Athletics

16 on Insight

And your Sneak Attack is now 6d6. What fun!

LEVEL 17 - ROGUE 12

12th level Rogues get yet another Ability Score Improvement, which of course means more Charisma!

(Artwork made for Legends of Runeterra by Riot Games.)

LEVEL 18 - ROGUE 13

13th level Thief Rogues can use any Sentinel weapon they reacquisition thanks to Use Magic Device. You ignore all class, race, and level requirements on the use of magic items, letting you have fun with whatever toys you find. And when all else fails your Absolver now packs a 7d6 Sneak Attack!

LEVEL 19 - ROGUE 14

14th level Rogues are so good at sneaking they can catch the sneakers! You have a 10 foot Blindsense to know if anyone’s hiding near you.

LEVEL 20 - ROGUE 15

Our final level is the 15th level of Rogue for Slippery Mind... You get proficiency in Wisdom saving throws. That’s it. Well how’s about 8d6 Sneak Attack as a final sendoff?

FINAL BUILD

PROS

I’ve got something for you! It’s... comeuppance - Three shots with a Hand Crossbow means three chances to apply your 8d6 Sneak Attack! Akshan is all about burst and burst people down you can certainly do!

Sometimes I even sneak up on myself - Supreme Sneak, One With Shadows, and the Invisibility spell will help you move around in the shadows without being spotted. And even without that you have a minimum 27 Stealth roll thanks to Reliable Talent!

You are reclaimed. Go! Live! - It obviously goes without saying but a little bit of healing helps a lot in the long run. Everyone can appreciate a pick me up.

CONS

You try to rest and some lowlife kills one of your palls! - You have a lot more limited resources than the average Warlock as your Healing Light only comes back after a Long Rest. What’s more is that most of your spells are utility based so it might be hard to get use out of the renewable nature of Warlock spell slots. And to top it off Revivify is expensive! So you’d best be ready to spend a lot of diamonds.

I live by my own code: don’t be an ass - Your Charisma unfortunately isn’t maxed out, which means your Warlock abilities aren’t maxed out. But you don’t really need maxed out Charisma as most of your spells are utility based... I’m just saying Sharpshooter is an option.

Shadya would approve of this... I think - You missed out on level 17 of Thief Rogue which means you don’t get arguably one of the strongest Rogue abilities in the game: Thief’s Reflexes. If you’re not going to get to level 20 anytime soon I think that this build is quite good but if you’re going to get to a high level maybe ditch the revives? (It’s more than likely that Cleric can do it better.)

But you’re enough of a hero without the super-awesome relic weapon that can bring people back from the dead; that’s just an added bonus... as is the grappling hook! Use your natural awesomeness to sneak up your foes and then use your legitimately-obtained weapons-of-mass-absolution to vanquish any scoundrel in your way! And if a depressed ghost king comes knocking tell him that the maximum time limit on your revives expired. “Silly Viego, we can’t bring back those we’ve lost. I mean, I can. But not you.”

(Artwork made for Legends of Runeterra by Riot Games.)