#sorry im a bit late in posting but i got i finished by today so thats a plus

[iced-souls]

Alas we begin

D09 DAY YAHOOOOOOOOOO

D09 day Pt 1

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

[broke-on-books]

😍😍😍

[springgirlshowers]

Let Me Show You

Summary: You haven’t been feeling very pretty lately, Joost decides to prove you wrong, and he won’t let you finish until you admit that you are.

CW: negative self talk/self image, tiny bit of crying, body worship, teasing, praise, so much foreplay, fingering, cunnilingus, edging, orgasm denial, overstimulation, i use google translate for dutch (im sorry 😭)

WC: 2827

A/N: i wassss gonna wait to post this, but i couldn’t help myself it feels wrong to keep the world waiting </33 challenge: take a shot every time the word “kiss” is said in this fic

You hadn’t been feeling well at all today.

Not in the sick with the flu sort of well, more of just not feeling well with yourself. Not feeling content with yourself.

It started in the morning, when you stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror. Joost was already gone, needing to stop by Teuns to clean up a few songs.

You leaned forwards in the mirror, analyzing your face. Feeling disappointed at it, for some reason, it felt like every single tiny little flaw was extremely noticeable. Every blemish, every bump, every pore, it all felt so much more noticeable.

You pushed at the apple of your cheeks, then leaning away from the mirror to look at your body.

You turned to the side, looking at your stomach and squeezing the flesh. Dropping your arms weakly as you continued to stare at yourself.

You felt ugly. You hated it. You wanted to crawl out of your own body.

Since that was impossible, you threw on a matching pair of gray sweats. Then curling yourself into a ball under the sheets. Hiding away from the world.

About three hours later, you heard the door unlock and the sound of shoes being kicked off. Joost called out your name, stopping once he saw the sight of your back and head on the bed, the rest of you covered up by the duvet.

He knew you were awake, it was only a few minutes after 3PM.

He walked over to your side of the bed, sitting on the edge and smiling at you as he stroked your hair. He could already tell from the look on your face that you were upset.

“Hey, what’s going on?” He spoke softly, eyebrows knit together in concern.

“Nothing, I’m just a bit tired.” You shrugged, Joost let out a breath through his nose, seeing straight through your lie.

Joost was your lover, of course he knew the difference between a tired expression versus a gloomy expression on your face.

“I know it’s not that, schat. Something’s bothering you.” Your eyes darted away for a second, you were trying to decide if you should keep up this act of just being “tired” or be honest.

“It’s really nothing, Joost.”

“You keeping whatever it is bottled up is only gonna make it worse, liefje. Trust me, I would know.” Joost tutted, rubbing your thigh.

He was right, you would know as well. You’ve told him the same thing before when he’d be upset about something.

"I just..." You sighed as you sat up, already feeling embarrassed about your upcoming confession. "I haven't been feeling very pretty lately." Joosts face turned into an immediate frown.

"How? What's not pretty about you?" He sounded almost insulted, insulted by the fact you would think so negatively about you.

"My face looks wrong. My body looks wrong. I’ve got a tummy on me. I don't know. I don’t know how to explain it exactly, I just don't feel attractive." You sighed, dragging your hands down your face.

“We all have a tummy. I’ve got a tummy.” He poked his stomach, smiling looking at it and then back up at you.

You shook your head as an amused smile spread on your face, you pulled the duvet off the rest of your body due to the heat becoming uncomfortable.

“You know what I mean, Joost.” You silently groaned and put your face into your hands.

“I do. But I don’t care.” Joosts voice was smooth as he removed your hands from your face, your eyes were already watering, he let out a sympathetic hum.

“You might not think it. But you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

You knew Joost was telling the truth. Anytime he would look at you, he felt like he was looking at an a real life angel sent by God himself.

You were just too far deep in the rabbit hole of your negative self talk.

Tears began to slip from your eyes and you turned your head away, Joost still had his hands cupped lightly around your face.

“I’m sorry. You know I don’t look pretty when I cry.” You sniffled, wiping away tears with the back of your hand. “My face gets all pink and blotchy.”

Joost gently turned your face back to him, taking in all your beautiful features.

“I love your face. Even if it’s all pink and blotchy.” His words got a small laugh out of you, he grinned .

“You really think so?” You asked, voice still shaky.

“I know so.” He wiped away another tear from your cheek with his thumb. This was cliché, but you loved it. You loved him.

“I can prove it to you, if you want?” Joost raised his brows, you knew exactly what he was suggesting. You nodded happily.

He quickly put his lips against yours, kissing so passionately. So sweetly.

“I wanna make a deal, ja?” Joost said in between kisses. You nodded.

“I’m gonna show you how beautiful you are.” He kisses the corner of your mouth. “I’m going to tell you, show you until you know it’s true.” He kisses the other side. “And then…you’re gonna tell me how pretty you are, then I’ll make you cum. Ja?”

“Joost..” You mumbled out, flustered already.

“You okay with that deal?” He kissed your lips gently, brushing some hair out your face.

“Okay. Okay. We have a deal.” You giggled, eyes closing.

“Good.” He smiled, the type of smile that made you feel like you could melt straight into the sheets. He kissed you one more time before moving his lips along your jaw.

He moved his hand, rubbing his thumb softly over your bottom lip.

“You know how much I love your lips.” He ran his mouth along your jaw, before moving to hover his face over yours.

“And your nose. This cute little nose.” He gave you a peck just on the tip of your nose, tapping it after and making a little boop! noise.

His antics got a small sniffle and laugh out of you. God, he was so silly. So unserious in such an intimate moment like this. You loved it. It made your nervousness fade away.

He moved to kiss both your eyelids next, so silly.

“Your eyes, I could stare into them all day if you didn’t think it was so creepy.” He chuckled. “Zo mooi. Ik zie je gezicht in mijn dromen.” He whispered, quickly moving his mouth to your neck. Your breath hitched as he placed sloppy kisses all over it.

His mouth ran over that sweet spot that made you let out a soft whimper, you could feel his smirk against your skin.

“Mijn mooie meisje.” His breath against your neck tickled, making you inch away from it.

His hands began to slide underneath your baggy sweatshirt, sliding up and down before going up one last time and bringing your sweatshirt with him.

He soon did the same with your sweatpants as he moved his lips along your collarbones, you lifted your hips to help remove them. He tossed them on the floor, along with your top.

He pulled away from your skin to look at you in complete awe. You were a bit embarrassed due to your extremely plain underwear, you didn’t bother to put on a bra this morning. If you knew you’d be getting intimate today, you would’ve worn something nicer.

Yet Joost didn’t care, his face didn’t care at all. Still staring at you like you were a dream come true. You were.

“Can’t believe you’d want to hide such a gorgeous body like this.” He grazed his fingers down your arm, grabbing your hand and lifting it up to your mouth, kissing your knuckles.

Your hands came up unconsciously to conceal your chest. Joost didn’t let this happen. He intertwined his hands with each of yours, holding them against the mattress.

“Aw, no hiding. I wanna see these pretty tits of yours.” You bit your lip and turned your head away, surprised at his explicit words.

He quickly brought his lips to your chest, kissing all over it. Between the valley of your breasts, above and below them. Finally placing his mouth on one of them.

A sharp gasp let out of you, Joost chuckled against you. Sucking and nipping at your breast, leaving red and purpling hickies.

He took your nipple into his mouth, making you squirm and arch your back slightly, he moved one hand to your other breast. Squeezing and playing with it for a little before switching his mouths attention to that one.

He didn’t need words to tell you how much he loved your tits. The messy kisses from his mouth were enough.

He ignored the way his dick was hardening in his pants at the sounds of your whimpers and breaths of pleasure. This evening, he was focusing on you, and you only.

He trailed his lips down, stopping at your stomach. He dragged his hands down, sliding them to the sides of your waist and squeezing, making you shiver.

“You know how much I love your tummy. I can’t count the amount of times I’ve fallen asleep when I lay my head on it.” He pressed a kiss just below your bellybutton. “Such a cute stomach, I don’t get how you could be so embarrassed of such a beautiful tummy like this.”

You weren’t sure how your stomach could be beautiful. But then you remembered all the times you thought the same about Joosts, going insane over the sight of it.

“All day all I do is want to hold you. I dream about it when I’m away. Did you know that?” He looked up at you, he looked like a goddamn dream.

You shook your head and he gave you a dramatic pout.

“No? I guess I should’ve told you sooner.” He moved his hands and squeezed your hips, another giggle escaped you.

He trailed small, slow, pecks above the waistband of your underwear. Soon hooking his fingers underneath and pulling them down your legs. Kissing your thighs as he did so.

He parted your legs with gentle hands, letting out a coo of adoration at the sight of you. You blushed and bit your finger, turning your head to the side.

He brought a tattooed hand back up to the side of your face, turning your gaze back to him as his thumb smoothed over your cheek.

He smiled at you with a face of pure infatuation. Not needing words to say how he felt about you once again.

He leaned down, eloping his lips around yours as you brought your head up from the pillow, pushing into the kiss.

A finger came up to your clit, gathering your wetness, you let a shaky breath into his mouth.

“It’s okay.” He smiled. Making a beeline of kisses all the way down until his mouth stopped right above your clit.

He held onto your thighs, bringing them up and squeezing the plush of them in his hands, bending your legs.

“Oh, so soft. I’d live in between your legs if you let me.”

“Naughty boy.” You giggled.

“Just being truthful.” He shrugged, he watched in adoration as he rubbed his middle finger in between your folds, his finger already covered in your slick. “Prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen.” He cooed.

He carefully inserted his finger inside you, staring at your face with a smile, watching how your mouth parted, eyes fluttering.

He came back up as his finger slowly pushed in and out, watching your face up close as he inserted a second finger.

“You ready to tell me what you are? Hm?” You tried your best to look at him as you let out a whiny moan. Which was your way of saying “Not really.”

“No? Then I should stop here, ja?” His fingers slowly began to pull out.

“Nononono. Pleasepleaseplease.” You breathed out, grabbing his hand to keep it from fully pulling away. He let out a defeated sigh.

“You’re lucky you’re so stunning. I’ll let you get away with it for now.” He kissed your cheek.

You let go of his wrist as his fingers began to pick up their pace once again, your eyes fluttering shut and mouth parting will small gasps.

He moved his mouth back to your chest, sucking at your tits, leaving little lovebites, you knew you’d be covered in red and purple marks by tomorrow.

He continued that same pattern of kissing trailing down until he reached your cunt.

“Cmon liefje, I need you to tell me how beautiful you are.” He rubbed his head against your thigh.

You shook your head as you bit down on your lip, eyes squeezing shut, you were already close to an orgasm.

“Hm, if you’re not gonna tell me, then I guess we’ll stop here.” He shrugged, puffing out his bottom lip as he removed his fingers from you.

“No!” You whined out at the sudden emptiness, cunt clenching around nothing. “Joost, you’re being mean.” You whined, hips squirming.

“Mm, I’m being fair. You tell me you’re pretty and I will let you cum.” He flicked a finger quickly against your clit, he grinned at the way your body jerked.

“Just admit what we both know is true.” He said in a sing-song voice. You rolled your eyes, frustrated.

“If you just tell me then I’ll give you want you want, liefje.” He teased again.

“Fine. I’m pretty.” You mumbled, you saw the way Joosts face perked up.

“Speak up schatje, I cannot hear you.” He could hear you, but he wanted to hear you loud and clear.

“I’m pretty.” You said, much louder this time.

“How pretty?” He cocked his head in a mocking manner, resting it against the plush of your thigh as his fingers slowly increased their speed.

Was he really doing this? Bastard.

“Really pretty. Fuck- I’m really pretty.” You said through shaky breaths.

“Ja, keep going.” He encouraged, licking a stripe up your cunt as his fingers pumped into you, and you whined again, he loved how flustered you looked.

He was eating you out like a man starved, his tongue deep and swirling circles around your clit, you weren’t even sure you’d be able to speak any coherent words.

“I’m pretty. God, fuck- I’m really pretty, Joost.” Your back began to arch off the bed, your hand reaching down to grip his hair as he hummed against your core.

“I’m so pretty, Joost. So so pretty, please. I’m beautiful, god. Fuck. Please, I’m pretty.” You begged, repeating it like it was a mantra. This was exactly Joosts goal.

“Dat klopt.” He pulled away from you to praise, his breath fanning against your cunt before he attached his lips back to it, beginning to suck on your clit.

Joost held onto your hips to still them. Your legs began to shake and the moans leaving you were borderline pornographic, loud and dramatic. But they were real, not forced.

“Joost, please, Joost. I’m pretty. Please can I cum? Please?” You begged, tears forming in your eyes. All the teasing before this made you so sensitive.

“Go ahead.” The vibration of his voice added to the pleasure, his fingers curled inside you, hitting that sweet spot.

Finally, finally you were cumming. The waves of your orgasm crashing over you, the intensity making the tears in your eyes fall and trail down the sides of your face. Joost continued as you rode through the aftershock, squealing and crying out as your grip on his hair tightened. He moaned against your dripping core.

He finally pulled away once your moans became raspy and you were squirming around. His chin covered in your wetness while he had the most prideful cheesy grin on his face.

“Mijn prachtige meisje. You did so good. So good for me.” He whispered against your skin, pressing small kisses all around your pussy and onto your thighs. Your body twitched with each peck, already overstimulated from all the teasing he did.

He crawled back up to hover over you, wiping the tears that fell with a gentle hand. A saccharine smile on his face to match the saccharine kiss he gave you next. You were still so shaky and out of breath, eyes droopy as you looked at him.

“Feel any better?” He ran his fingers through your hair, scratching at your head, you leaned into his touch.

“Yeah…actually. Yeah.” You gave him a puzzled smile, not expecting this to actually work.

“See. I knew you’d try for me.” He smooched your forehead.

“I’m really sweaty, I need a bath.” You laughed, still breathless.

“I’ll run you one.” He sighed playfully, knowing that your words were a request.

“Will you carry me?” He let out another chuckle, shaking his head in amusement before scooping you up bridal style.

“I can never say no to you.”

[withlove-xixi]

bard anon again with an nsfw/suggestive request: brat tamer chilchuck pls 👉👈 teasing and discipline…

— LESSONS TAUGHT: chilchuck x reader

ᥫ cw: nsfw, dom/sub, petnames, teasing, riding, praise, creampie ᥫ wc: 2988 ★ my dear bard anon, first im sorry for doing your requests out of order i promise i'll work on yer other req soon :3! second, AUGHAHASNDGNN ANSDGMMMANSN AUGHHAHSNDNN brat tamer chilchuck ... i need this old man in my bed so bad ... so terribly bad ...!!! lastly, im sorry if its not how you expected it to be TT aughhh i hope you enjoy tho! cross posted on ao3 — MINORS DNI! —

— SOME LESSONS IN LIFE ARE BEST LEARNED BY EXPERIENCE.

[♡]: chilchuck was an impatient man, whether it was with work or with friends, he could always only stretch his patience so thin. with you, he was always more lenient, of course, you were his favorite after all. but there were times, where you wore his patience down too.

THERE'S A HIGH PITCHED WHINE that echoes through the wooden walls of Chilchuck's bedroom, something impatient, something bratty.

"Pl… Please, Chil…" You plea softly, a small droplet of drool dribbling down the corner of your lips.

He only hums, hands smoothing over the skin of your ass, caressing it in such a gentle manner. He stays speechless, and you know he's calculating something, plotting exactly how he wants to enjoy your punishment. Chilchuck could really be mean when he wanted to.

Ah, but he'd justify that he was only mean when he needed to be.

Now was one of those times as you helplessly squirm on his lap, whining from the lack of stimulation. He's had you in this hold for quite some time now, only ever moving his hands to grab at your ass or back to your hips to stop you from grinding against him. It was unfair, terribly so. You didn't even do anything too bad. Well, maybe a bit bad.

Early that afternoon you had sauntered in the half-foot union headquarters with the intent to cause some trouble for your darling Chilchuck, who made it very clear he would be busy that afternoon. You justified your visit by telling yourself it was a means to cheer him up (which was half-true, really) since he had been working so hard lately, he barely had time to breath (which was completely true).

So there you were, wrapping your arms around Chilchuck's neck, pulling him to sit flush against his chair so you could kiss the top of your head.

"Come on, Chil," you say in a singsong tone, "come take a break. For me?"

You feel his body stiffen a bit and see his fingers twitch slightly. Oh, you knew he had a soft spot for you, it was something you abused quite often. But today Chilchuck seems unmoving, sighing deeply and continuing with paperwork.

"Darling, you know I can't." He says simply and slowly, like he was explaining something to a child. "Got work."

"And no time for me?" You draw out the last word as sweetly as you can. He stiffens a second time and a moment passes before he looks up at you. You bat your lashes at him, smiling innocently at your lover.

Chilchuck sighs again. "Not now, sweetheart." Though he sounds about ready to ravage you then and there.

You make a show of letting known your disappointment, huffing and peeling your hands away from him to cross them. You pout down at him and you fight a smirk when you see his eye twitch.

"Hey, come on, don't be like that." He says and turns his chair to face you. Chilchuck's hands pry apart your crossed ones and his thumbs smooth over the backs of your palms. "Could have fun at home sweetheart," he kisses the back of each hand one at a time, "just lemme finish up my work."

This was a rarity for Chilchuck, to be willing enough to ask this of anyone so nicely and so easily. You know it's because he's asking you, and when it comes to you, you've seen miracles happen with Chilchuck, moments and secrets he dare not share with anyone else. Despite that you huff again and turn your head to the side, you feel his grip on your hands tighten slightly.

"Let's have fun now!" You try again, whining. Your hands leave his as you make big gestures to sell him on your idea. "Take a break, Chil, please. I can make it quick." You say that last bit with a playful wink.

His eye twitches again, more obvious this time. You can tell he's fighting really hard not to give into his wants, not to give into you. Again, you've seen miracles happen with Chilchuck.

"No means no," he says so sternly after a brief moment of silence as he turns his chair back to focus on his work.

You open your mouth to protest again but he quickly cuts you off. "Don't test me on this, darling. I'm serious."

At this point, you’re the one annoyed, ticked off at the fact he’s so stubborn. Sure you admired his worth ethic, always prioritizing work before leisure, making sure everything is done, but gods! Get a grip, Chilchuck! You’ve been practically throwing yourself at him but he’s just too stubborn to budge! Any sane man would fold as soon as he sees his hot partner be so eager for him!

Again you make a show of your emotions, nearly growling in frustration as you throw your arms in the air. “Fine then! I don’t care!” You yell exasperatedly as you begin to stomp away.

Not before Chilchuck quickly catches your wrist. You turn back to him with an open mouth and a glare, wanting to yell a few more things, but you immediately freeze when you meet his eyes. His usual warm brown eyes now hold a stern, unamused look and your breath hitches in your throat.

“You’re really going to be like that?” He asks, but it’s more of a statement — a challenge. To which you huff at and stick your tongue out to.

Not quite the best choice seeing as Chilchuck’s got you all wet and needy and doing nothing about it at all.

You whine again as you try to grind your hips against his, trying your hardest to catch even a sliver of friction against his warm cock. But he spares you no alms, hands moving back to your waist to keep you still. Such a terrible position to be in! Any other time, you’d be gleefully bouncing yourself up and down his lap, savoring the way he feels scrapping your insides. But today? Now? When he’s got you naked and just sitting on his lap? When he had previously spent eternity pumps his experienced fingers in and out of you, only to stop when you’ve reached the precipice of pleasure? Not as fun considering how much trouble you went to to finally get him in bed with you. And Chilchuck wasn’t even naked! He was wearing his black long sleeved shirt still, his belt remained unbuckled, his pants unbuttoned, hell, he was still wearing that damn neckwarmer!

“Ch- Chil…” You try again with pleading, looking at him with a big pout as a tearful expression. “Please… hah… Need you… Please…”

Your breathing is ragged, uneven. Chilchuck merely stares at you (though you don’t miss the way his brow twitches when he sees you pout).

He finally makes a sound, humming as if in thought. “You really need to be taught a lesson, huh?”

Your brows furrow. You don’t like where this is going.

Your mouth opens to speak, but he cuts you off. “Don’t you think it’s unfair if I just give you what you want, sweetheart?” Chilchuck asks as a hand moves back down to smooth over the fat of your ass. He doesn’t let you even think about an answer before he’s continuing with a small tsk. “Making a big fuss at work? Thinking I’ll give you what you want if you show me those pouty lips of yours? Really think that’s fair?”

You shake your head, though the response is nearly instinctive. Chilchuck picks up on that, rubbing circles on your ass before he lifts his hand and brings it back down with a loud smack. You jolt at the sting, the pain shooting straight up your spine. You whine in response.

“Can’t have you being like that, darling. Gotta teach you a lesson.” He says as his hand comes down again; another slap, another whine.

You shake your head again. “I- ‘M sorry… Chil—”

He tuts softly. “None of that now, darling. Gotta be good for me, learn your lesson, yeah?” Chilchuck says as he pulls you closer, bringing your ass up higher.

He continues to slap your ass, almost rhythmically the way his hand lifts up only to come back down with searing pain. Tears well up in your eyes as you whine the whole time, incoherent pleas to stop and half-hearted promises to behave leave your lips as stray tears roll down your cheeks. Chilchuck resists the urge to just stop and give in to what you want, but he reminds himself that that was the whole purpose of your punishment; for being bratty.

Chilchuck's hand suddenly stops, resting on your ass as you huff out small sobs, letting tears freely fall. He smiles at you endearingly, though you miss it with the tears blurring your vision. His other hand comes up to brush against your cheek, wiping away the tears as he brings you closer, kissing you just below your eyes.

"Shh, it's okay," he coos and you feel yourself instantly melt. "Didn't mean to make you cry. I'm sorry, sweetheart."

You can tell enough his apology is genuine, but instinct tells you your punishment wasn't going to end so quickly.

But you sniffle anyway, letting Chilchuck whisper sweet reassurance into your ear as he rubs over the sore flesh of your ass, the other hand smoothing over the back of your head, stroking your hair.

"Have to be punished so you could learn your lesson." He explains slowly. "You understand right?"

With a small sniffle, you nod wordlessly, frowning slightly as you cast your eyes downward.

Chilchuck shushes you again and pulls you closer by the back of your head. He plants a gentle kiss on your forehead, pressing his face into your shoulder after. "So good for me…" He whispers. "So very good."

You whimper pathetically at the praise, stomach twisting in knots, and you feel Chilchuck smile slightly against your skin.

"Can—" you sniffle "Can we–"

"Not yet, darling. Can't let you off the hook yet." Chilchuck says, his tone is gentle, like he has to be for you to understand.

You whimper a second time, moving to try and lower yourself on him again. “Please, Chil… I’ll be— be nice… I’ll be good, please…”

There’s a pause the way he suddenly tilts his head backwards, exposing his neck to you. You watch his Adam's apple bob when he swallows slightly and you feel yourself grow just a bit needier. You lean forward, pressing your nose against the side of his neck, hot breath warming his skin as you pant against it. You let out a high pitched whine. “Please, Chil… Please…” You plead as you plant a light, experimental kiss on his skin as you hear him suck his breath through his teeth. His grip on your waist tightens slightly, fingers twitching against your skin.

You take this as a sign to keep going, leverage if you will. So you keep kissing him, very carefully peppering his neck with small, featherlight kisses, each one leading up higher to just below his ear, where you whisper a small, whiny “please”; all of which is enough for Chilchuck to snap.

He sighs, almost in defeat, and brings his hands to your shoulders to gently push you off him and make you look him in the eyes. Brown eyes stare back at yours with such fiery intensity, with such want; it was hard not to feel small under his gaze.

“Fine,” he says, like he has no other choice but to let you have your way. “Just this one time, okay, sweetheart? Just one time.”

A smile breaks on your face as you nod enthusiastically. “Yes! Please!” You say, desperation evident in your voice.

Chilchuck lets out a short chuckle, amused with your reaction. “There’ll be a catch though, darling, since I’m already doing so much by just pardoning your punishment.” He punctuates the statement with a shrug and you lift off him.

“What? No! You can’t!” You immediately respond despite not knowing what he has planned.

Chilchuck frowns at you. “Guess you don’t really want this then? Was gonna let you cum all nice and pretty but I gu—”

“No, no! I’ll do it! Chil!” You draw out his name in a whine as you pout at him with furrowed brows. The audacity he had to tease you at a time like this.

He smiles at you, too innocently, and reaches a hand down to undo his pants. Chilchuck taps on your thigh and you lift yourself off him to give him more room. He slides his pants and undergarments down, just enough for his cock to spring out. Your mouth waters at the sight, the feel of its warmth against your thigh. Another whine leaves your mouth as you buck your hips, urging Chilchuck to move already.

Thankfully, he gets the message, guiding your hips downward to meet his cock. It slips easily inside of your awaiting hole, its warmth and girth instantly filling you up. You make a pleasured sound, a languid moan that melts into a relieved sigh, finally at ease now that Chilchuck’s finally buried inside you.

You stare at him pleadingly but expectantly, impatiently waiting for him to buck his hips up into yours. But Chilchuck makes no such move, his hands remain still on your hips. Instead, the half-foot smiles at you, a mischievous grin that suddenly fills your stomach with dread.

“A catch remember, sweetheart?” He says, carefree. “Been bad, so you gotta work for what you want.”

You open your mouth to complain, but he quickly quirks an eyebrow at you. “Or have you changed your mind, darling? Don’t want this anymore?”

You shake your head vigorously and Chilchuck laughs at the way your relaxed expression instantly shifts to unease. Had it been a different circumstance, you might’ve swatted at Chilchuck for laughing at you, might’ve called him a meanie too for bullying you this much, but your body betrays you as his grip twitches against you when you involuntarily tighten up.

This time, Chilchuck looks at you expectantly. “Well, go on.”

Your eyebrows knit as you frown at him, but shakily make a move anyway, placing one hand on his shoulder and slowly lifting yourself off him. A deep groan echoes from Chilchuck, a shaky breath escapes you. Very gently, you begin pushing yourself back down until he’s back fully inside you.

You repeat the process, shakily lifting yourself up and plunging back down until you form a steady rhythm, bouncing up and down his cock with gusto. Chilchuck groans every time you come back down to sheath him inside of you, his grip on your hips tight enough to leave marks, his voice growing more and more animalistic the more you go on.

“So good, doing so good, darling.” He praises as he leans forward to meet your neck with his lips. His teeth graze against your skin as he bites down, exhaling against your skin with his mouth around it.

You whine when he bites, tightening your grip on his shoulder as you moan out his name. You feel his hips slightly buck upwards into you, pushing his cock deeper into you when you push yourself back down.

“Hah- Chil-” You say his name between pants. Quickly, he moves his mouth from your neck to your lips, one of his hands comes behind your neck to pull you against him. His tongue slips inside, pressing against yours in a sloppy wet kiss.

You find it difficult to focus both on kissing Chilchuck and fucking him, your pace falters as you begin to shakily pull yourself off him, muffle whimpers filling the confines of his bedroom. Thankfully, Chilchuck’s good at multitasking. He lets out a sharp, frustrated exhale through his nose as he forcefully thrusts his hips upward, making up for the sudden irregularity in your pace.

You moan unabashedly when he finally pulls away from the kiss, your hand on his shoulder moving to hold onto him more desperately, nails digging into the skin of his back as you cling onto him for stability, to ground yourself. Chilchuck’s hand finds yours, intertwining your fingers together as he continues to fuck into you, almost frantically bucking his hips into yours as you both draw closer to your peak.

You can tell he’s close with the way his groans sound almost like growls, something low and full against the shell of your ear. The sound alone is almost enough to set you off the edge, but that combined with his grip on your hips with the twitch of his cock against your warm walls and the praise he whispers between groans.

“Feel so good, darling.” He whispers, voice grown hoarse and gruff. “Wanna keep you like this, keep my dick inside you. You want that, darling? Fuck-”

Your thoughts are incoherent, therefore your response is incoherent too, a string of yes’s and vigorous nods mewled between high pitched moans and whines. Your hips try to keep up with his pace despite your legs beginning to shake. You’re close, you’re sure he can tell. Chilchuck kisses you again, wet, opened-mouthed and sloppy, teeth clashing against teeth, saliva mixing with saliva. He keeps kissing you as he suddenly thrusts upward one last time and his hand pulls you flush against his lap at the same time, forcing his cock as deep inside you as possible, filling you with warmth as he cums deep inside you.

You don’t last much longer, tightening around him as you reach the precipice of pleasure, milking his orgasm as you pulse against his cock. You pull away first from the kiss, panting, desperate to catch your breath. Chilchuck’s panting too, but he smiles as he brings a hand up to your cheek, caressing it gently and brushing sweat-slicked hair away from your face.

“Learned your lesson?” He asks, breathlessly yet easily.

Dazily, you nod slowly, licking your lips to moisten them. He presses a chaste kiss on your forehead as the hand on your hip rubs small, soothing circles on your skin.

“Good.” Chilchuck says. “Because next time, I’m not going to be as lenient.”

[yyokkki]

Asking to Sketch Them

HEARTSLABYUL

Riddle Rosehearts

Honestly a bit shocked you’d ask him

But he’s had practice from posing for family portraits, so he isn’t too nervous

Until you say you want the backdrop to be Heartslabyul’s garden

It doesn’t break any rules… but that doesn’t mean someone else won’t break any rules

He doesn’t collar people as often as he used to, but he still makes it a point to lecture rulebreakers on the importance of said rule

So imagine the strain on his face when Ace walks by with a vase full of roses and it’s Wednesday.

In the end Ace sits beside you while Riddle gives a long lecture, keeping the rest of his body perfectly still so it doesn’t interfere with your work

You are sweating in fear. 6/10 a good model but it’s hard to draw when your model is half yelling at the dude sitting right next to you

Trey Clover

Might hesitate to say yes because he’s a busy guy,,

I mean they have tea parties like everyday and he’s always in charge of sweets-

You say he can go about his business and that you’re going to capture him in his natural habitat then he agrees

Raises an eyebrow cuz you make it sound like you’re on national geographic but ok

Anyways you’re drawing him while he’s baking and damnnn those biceps pop when he’s whisking

Secretly, however, he’s been holding back for a while now/

When you’re least expecting it he comes closer to you… and bam whipped cream on the side of your face

Devolves into flour tossing and chaos

6/10 you got whipped cream on your sketchbook and it was half finished but it was a fun memory

Cater Diamond

“OMS YAY of course ;DD”

Internally screaming because his makeup isn’t that good today and why him I mean there are better looking people in nrc and maybe he can get his clone to do it instead-

Overthinker fr

He’s a bit stiff at first, trying to only show his good side and checking his camera constantly to see if his smile looks good

If you’re close and you start talking to him about something he’s passionate about while you’re sketching he’ll loosen up a bit and his pose becomes a lot more natural

Eventually forgets you’re even drawing him and now it’s just him showing his true colours

Takes a pic of your finished sketch along with the both of you and posts it on magicam #muse #artistbestie

8/10 the sketch turned out well and you had a nice chat 

Deuce Spade

Has never been asked this question in his life

Boy is so stiff and awkward pls baby

He smiles like Oga from Beelzebub at first

Pls pls pls get this boy to do something else while you’re drawing him to get him to relax

Might be studying across the table from you while having a nice chat

Forgets you’re drawing him eventually pt.2

Tbh moves around a lot especially if a senior enters the room cuz he makes it a point to turn around and greet them while standing up

Is a bit surprised when you say you’re done because shit I forgot and I moved so much im sorry-

Also takes a picture of the sketch

Texts his mom the pic “I made a really good friend who’s great at drawing :D”

Will ask if you can draw a portrait of him and his mom together when you get the chance (will pay for it he just doesn’t know about the concept of commissions TT)

4/10 he’s so precious but not the best model tbh id still ask him again idc

Ace Trappola

Little shit (affectionate)

Not hard to make him agree but boy will he give you shit for it “my face is just that handsome ig” “you want me to get nude?” someone kiss him and make him shut up

At first he’s making a bunch of dumb faces and exaggerated poses and once he determines that you’re sufficiently annoyed he starts actually posing normally

Might get up halfway through and start stretching or laying down cuz he got tired though

Depending on how late he slept the night before and if you’re keeping quiet so he doesn’t get the chance to tease you, he might fall asleep

His sleeping face is cute so it works out for you ehe

When you’re done he acts all non chalant and smug about it but inside he’s sooo happy damn tsundere

Asks if he can draw you next and draws a potato with three dots on it <3

2/10 its only easy when he falls asleep but he’s cute so ill give him 1 extra point

-----

Heartslabyul | Savanaclaw | Octavinelle | Scarabia | Pomefiore | Ignihyde | Diasomnia

Graphic design is not my passion dear lord i really need to read a guide on how to format tumblr posts TT

Also first time writing omg depending on my mood next part will either be out tomorrow or next month see yall

[r4ikkonen]

Can you please write a smut for younger!reader x Toto Wolff? Idk I just read your new post for Toto and I felt so hot

Morning sex | Toto Wolff x reader

A/N heyy!! Im sorry you had to wait this long, tyy for requesting anyway enjoy this :)

tw: age gap, swearing, sex

It was a sunny day in Italy and everyone was still in their hotel rooms preparing for today’s race.You woke up in your hotel room with a slight hangover from last night.Mercedes had a party and you couldn’t help but celebrate Lewis’ great start.You felt the sun shining directly in your eyes that made you turn around and face the man that was laying next to you.He was peacefully sleeping with his hair over his face.You pulled yourself into his chest which made him let out a deep breath.He opened his eyes and saw you tugging his chest.He slowly reached his hand on your hip.You could feel goosebumps rise up on your bareskin.”Good morning” He muttered giving you a smirk, his eyes were nearly closed.You sat on his stomach exposing his abs.”Good morning, Toto” He was now quite awake and I could feel his bulge forming in boxers as I was sitting on top of him.He carefully placed his hands on my thighs and started placing them closer to the intimate area.”Fuck Toto” You muttered knowing what’s about to happen now.”Hm.. You don’t want me?” Toto teased making you even more desperate for him.”No.. No fuck please Toto I need you..” You whinned convincing him to fuck the hell out of you.He stood up and swapped positions with you.He held your hands above your head stopping you from moving them.”God y/n.. The things you make me do..” Toto said to you while playing with the fabric of your underwear.He was a big teaser and he would make you beg for him until you physically couldn’t handle it anymore.Toto circled around your pussy with his fingers making small gestures that made you want him even more.He kept staring at your facial expressions.They turned him on so much.He kept teasing your pussy with his fingers.You pressed your thighs together giving him a confused look.He raised his eyebrow and looked at you.Toto knew exactly what you wanted his dick and nothing more. “Sorry..” You whined hopping that you didn’t offend him. “Alright then..” He said with a serious face.He pulled you very hard revealing the naked body of yours.You lovked eye contact and his hair got very messy.He didn’t care about anything else than fucking you right there on that bed.He pulled two fingers inside your mouth.You observed them with your tongue.Sucking on them wishing it was his dick.He pulled his fingers out of your mouth and straight to your pussy.You couldn’t help but make a noise.He catched his pace and he kept fingering you until you begged for more.After awhile he got bored so he pulled out his dick.”Ready?” He gave you a serious look.”mhm” you said not knowing what’s waiting for you.He inserted his dick in you carefully.You could feel your pussy stretching.”Ah fuck Toto” You moaned.He grabbed your hips carefully and started catching up his speed.The skin banging on each other was loud and you couldn’t help yourself but moan to his actions.He leaned over to kiss your neck.Leaving all the hickeys there.You felt his warm breath on your neck.He started going even faster and you almost collapsed.”Uhh.. Toto fuck” “I’m.. I’m close” you whimpered with hope that he is too. “Cum for me y/n”.He demanded staring at you with his gorgeous brown eyes.He cupped your cheek while you moaned out his name a bunch of times.”Ah fuck..” Toto groaned finishing inside of you.When he pulled his dick out youfelt his cum dripping off of you.He leaned over you hugging your chest.You were breathing so loud.You could feel your heart beat.Toto stood up and quickly got dressed up. “Shit y/n we are going to be late” He hurried you up making a bit of a scene.”Uhh okay okay” You said trying to find your clothes.Your legs were still shaking and you hoped that he didn’t notice it.If he did he would have teased you.Both of you quickly got out of the hotel room and went to the Mercedes Office…

[namelessdeceased]

.🦋 D-1 ✧ sun ✧ 22.9.24 ✧ sawc day 52

sorry ive been so inconsistent with posting lately burnout gets BAD and its especially horrible when i get it near my exams. plus this boy got his period the day before his exams (what the fuck man i got he/him in my bio). its almost over!! and i had a lot of fun at game night a few days back. last stretch! probably gonna do some sort of all-nighter today.

.🍪 academic

finish U5 chinese flashcards

revise U3+U4 chinese flashcards

check vocab against flashcards (if i have more to do)

create 成语 flashcards

.🔗 personal

go to kapap

calm down a bit i feel like im gonna die

.☕ sawc

sleep: 0h (we pray)

routine: morning

focus: 2h

body: kapap

read: no time :(

.📜 goal productive: 5-6h

.♬ ~ iris 〢 the goo goo dolls

.🤎 positivityposting

what's one thing you believe you're especially good at ?

good evening!

╰ theo 🪐

[verycharismaticdragon]

On Air Island - chapter 4 - part 11

navigation: [prev] - [next]

catching up: ch.1 [full] - ch.2 p.1 - story so far [transcript]

other: [character guide] - [to avoid sp⊘ilers]

First of all sorry for the longass pause I got sick... autumn is here huh 🤧 Anyhow, we are finishing chapter 4 today, and hopefully I'll have c5p1 ready by the usual timeslot [3pm/15:00 (utc+0)] tomorrow as well. though please bear with me if it doesn't work out, im feeling better but im not back to full HP yet -_-

Okay, let's get back on track!

(the transcript is available below the poll, under keep reading)

Oh right, speaking of timeslots, I was wondering...

Transcript legend:

In-game text

Character speaking: dialogue line

regular chat message Donation: donation message

available donation messages

{ Alternative translation }

|| 🏅 award (achievement) collected ||

———— ———— ————

Hanse: DUCKACOON, I'm so glad you're okay.

[player] donated 50 Small Diamond: I really want to know how did Ezra find DUCKACOON!

Hanse: Uh…… Ezra, How did you meet DUCKACOON?

Hanse: Some observers are curious. 

MoMoliza: ?

Ezra: Ah~ We met near the vending machine.

Ezra: DUCKACOON came to check the vending machine and fell asleep.

savvymn: Sleep???

DUCKACOON: … … … … …

han-L: Well, it’s late though donateme: Or maybe DUCKACOON is too tired Go_Naoto: It’s hard to earn some money

Hanse: You haven't said anything since earlier... ...You're sure you're not hurt?

DUCKACOON: …Don't leave me alone…

Carat: ? hansehan: What did you say? PorkSoup: Yeah bbongGGu: Ask him to repeat

Hanse: What?

Ezra: It's fate that we bumped into each other like this...Shall we go back to base camp together?

itsme: ???? onionin: Eh??? Rolling: What… Galchi19: I think I have a good intuition { I’m so excited~~~ } BabyKing: That’s sus

Ezra: The crew has been searching for DUCKACOON. Let's go back and show them that you're safe. { The crew has been looking for DUCKACOON as well. We should hurry back and show them that DUCKACOON is alright. }

Hanse: Ah... ... ... ... … { Ah, yes… … … … }

Hanse: By the way, Ezra, you haven't found PD either, have you?

Ezra: Yeah. Unfortunately.

Ezra: I wish there was a rule about setting off firecrackers when you find PD. { Ah, it would have been nice if there was a rule to set off a flare when you find PD. }

ilovebts: IKR 180x181: Mmmh RaMe: It’s a bit hard

Hanse: Yeah.......We don't have any way of contacting him now, and we're all scattered....... { I know…… We have no means of communication right now, and everyone is scattered… }

cocobab: Someone must be found it { Did someone find him? } ImABear: They might have found something important { Mr.Fact might have found something } UKnowHer: Or it could be Naoto

Hanse: Where actually the PD is?

danceme: That’s right GuSa: It’s too late now, let’s go Blinkhan: We found DUCKACOON instead of the PD clover30: Can’t the production staff do something??? hanshack: ???: We will give cute DUCKACOON instead… [player]: Let’s go back and find out

Hanse: Okay. I think I need to get back to the base camp!

1ofEvery: Yeah Rolling: Let’s go! cutesnah: Can you finally rest now???

<Please check your connection>

… … … … …

… … … … …

[muikitoo]

~ Just friends ~

Im sorry this is a bit late, i was busy today 😅

You were currently in your room, fangirling and jumping around.

Yuichiro had asked you to go to an aquarium that same day! You felt so excited! You layed in bed, rolling around when u checked your phone and realised.

ITS 4:30PM?! YOU HAD TO LEAVE AT 6!

You hurried off as you took a shower and did your make up and hair. You were currently debating which dress to put on. You sighed in defeat.

"Why am i even trying so hard?! I mean its not like im going on a date with him... I should just dress casually.."

You paused.. ARE U GOING ON A DATE?! HE DIDNT SPECIFY. Your cheeks flushed but tried to shoo those thoughts away.

"theres no way! Im sure yui wouldnt mean it that way, were just friends!"

After mentally scolding yourself and FINALLYYYYY choosing a dress, you heard your doorbell ring. You flinched and quickly took your bag and whatever u had to take and hurried down and opened the door.

"IM SO SORRY!" you slammed the door open.

"its fine—" Yuichiros breath hitched seeing you. You looked so beautiful. He stared at u, mouth agaped and eyes wide, his face felt hot.

"Yui? Are you okay? Is there something on me?" You felt concerned and your face fell into a frown. Looking down to see if u had a spot or something on your dress.

"N-No! No! Im uh, im sorry. Lets go." He turned around a hurried off as you somehow managed to keep up.

When you got there it was PACKED WITH PEOPLE.

Somehow you two managed to get in, surprisingly after a short wait.

There was a few people looking over at you giggling, probably thinking you were a couple😭(HAHA YOU WISH)

Otherwise u had a LOT of fun.

And if you wanted anything like a drink, Yui would always insist to pay.

You saw a lot of things, personally yuichiro liked the sharks and sting rays!

(i see him liking those)

You got some souvenirs and other stuff too!

Ofc yuichiro insisted to pay again🤭

"Hey Yui, do you think this necklace looks good?" You say as you put a pretty blue necklace around you neck.

"looks great. Ill buy it for you." Yuichiro said as if it was nothing.

"w-wha- but-"

"no buts."

After you left the aquarium, you and yuichiro went to get some ice cream before you head back.

He decided to walk you home, and once you got to your front doorstep, you turned around with a soft smile.

"Thank you for today, Yui, i really enjoyed it."

"Its no proble—" before he could finish, you leaned in as you captured him in a kiss. Your lips brushed gently against his. It was so tender and sweet, it made you melt.

After a few seconds, you pulled away, cheeks flushed as you had such a loving expression on your face.

His jaw dropped as he stood there stunned.

You chuckled. "I guess its safe to say were not just friends?"

"absolutely." He said, still stunned.

Im sorry if this was shit, it was rushed bc i was late to post this. And it probably has nothing to do with the title so im wondering if i should change the title to "Aquarium date with Yuichiro" what do u think? 🤔

[drrobobitch]

Got a little challenge from my sister to draw a Hellaverse version of a Disney villains but I had to kinda insipre them from a deadly sin too so idk if you watch Hazbin hotel/Helluva boss but I took the challenge and chose Hades and Asmodues from Helluva boss....bit scared to actually post and share this guy though, I feel like his outfit can use more work

OMGGG WAIT I LOVE THIS THOO

I haven’t really watched much of helluva boss (I will admit tho…did watch hazbin hotel but only after I found out that season one was finished😭💀) I liked the characters a bit but that was about it and I never really saw a the episodes with Asmodues but I do know who he is!!

Honestly this is a pretty good fit for Hades tho lmaooooo I love the design you gave him too!! If you wanna add more than I suggest giving him a jacket or cape (hood??) or something like that but otherwise I really like the design this is so good (THE PINK HAIR TOO DJEJEJDJJDJD)

(ALSO SORRY IM SO LATE SCHOOL HAD ME HELLA BUSY TODAY I LITERALLY HAD TWO TESTS AND A PROJECT TO TURN IN LMAOOO.)

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

hi im anon from (734828727660412928/npd-culture-is-deciding-to-give-up-on-friendships?source=share) (hopefully that link works, I don't use tumblr often so I'm not sure how to go about following up asks on anon). just came back to read this blog during a really bad crash im having right now because it cheers me up to know im not alone in having symptoms of this disorder and saw my ask got posted...

(update on friend situation) just today they said in the group chat theyre all drawing gift art for each other and other friends... i'm still waiting on the paid art from them but they're doing art trades and stuff for free so i feel kind of like trash. im a bit of a bleeding heart though so im gonna give them like one more month before telling them not to bother finishing the art for me... id love my money back because it did cost a LOT of money but i dont want to be a dick so im just going to express my disappointment by telling them not to worry about the commission at all. i want to feel like i have some right to be mad in this situation but im very soft hearted and dont really have any other friends so if i lost these friends id have literally nobody else in my life :( and that kinda feels like hell for me to think about... i feel like im being treated like dirt but im still going to go christmas shopping for them.............. even if i feel like shit, i feel shittier if i dont get people gifts and stuff because i just think to myself, like, "i feel like crap if nobody buys me shit for holidays or my fucking own birthday and i dont want other people to feel that way".....

also im feeling a little sad because whenever my friends talk about their friends they dont even refer to me by name theyll go "[friend a name], [friend b name] and oomfie are in our server" or something. im not even a name to them... i feel like the last kid picked on a team but not even the last pick. like have you guys ever been on a sports team and you kinda got awkwardly waved over to one of the teams because nobody even wanted to pick you? yeah.

i wonder if im just really dense and need to pick up on hints that people dont even want to be around me. i even tried to post this video game i started working on lately because i thought it was really interesting and cool and i put my soul into it but everyone just ignored it in the group chat.

i think the social outcast route is probably my best bet at this rate, i think. im going to be pretty fucking depressed about limiting my social interactions but i think the depression from isolation isnt as bad as getting constant narc crashes from people not putting even a tiny bit of energy into friendships. like.. i honestly am not asking for very much. i get fucking narc highs if someone uses my fucking name in a conversation. i get highs from literally the bare minimum fucking interaction of anything directed in my direction im so desperate....

i wasnt going to write up a follow up ask but i just wanted to say thanks to this blog for existing and making me feel like im not completely alone and thanks for the nice comments in the reblogs and tags, it cheered me up. you guys are really nice to me and i'm a complete stranger to you all, it makes me feel like theres some hope for nice people existing out there. im just a little too tired to carry on. thank you all, i hope you have a really good day. keep on surviving out there, it's not a kind world to any of us, and it's tough to stay alive at all.

(apologies for another vent but thanks for posting my asks <3 i wish you all the best and nice days to come. also sorry this isnt in the npd culture format, but i just rly wanted to say thank you for the support on the other ask)

sending hugs (with consent) nonny 🫂 i'm so sorry honestly you deserve way better than how your friends are treating you :( i hope at some point you can talk to them about how they're making you feel and improve the situation because it sounds like you deserve better

[lostxmelody]

sorry for so many text posts recently! i have a few art pieces in mind that i'll get to eventually :')

anyway, today i wanted to share how i got into milgram because i think im a bit of a special case as i didn't get into it via recommendations or even just happening to stumble across it somewhere.

i got into it because of D4DJ!! not sure how many people know this-- but back in late april/early may 2022 they did a limited time collab. through this i heard several of the trial songs and i loved them! HARROW was actually the first i listened to iirc but i immediately fell in love with both that and MeMe (major hanae natsuki bias here).

...but i never watched the trials themselves and ended up not getting into the actual series until earlier this year. it was kind of just a brain worm for a while lol. but now im here... in milgram hell... and loving every single second of it.

to finish it off i wanted to show that yes-- they had limited in-game items that i own!

its so funny to look at... like why is es milgram in this rhythm gacha game??? hilarious.

[moreaujeans]

hi leigh!! i hope you're well :) saw your post with asks and decided i would combine lots of them lol so first thing is tell me abt whatever's bothering you!! i hope nothing's bothering you obv but still.

also i am asking you for book recs. i haven't been reading a lot of proper books lately so any recs are welcome but i kind of feel like some fantasy would do me good. but like good ones? The last couple of years i've been picking up some popular fantasy standalones hoping they feel like a fantasy book you read when you're twelve and they end up being the most mid thing i've ever read. like help. i'm planning to read some robin hobb books so hopefully they're good.

also i've started listening to mitski (talk about being late lol) and i'm really liking her songs i was wondering if you have any particular recs? Or any music recs? what've you been listening to?

sorry this ask is all over the place lol i guess i'm chatty today. i hope you're having an amazing day!! <3<333

ORLA!!!! i hope you are doing well too <3 one thing that is bothering me is school is starting again bc i have gotten virtually no break </3 also that apparently the english class i’m taking doesn’t have any required books i was looking forward to reading actual books not whatever mini readings ig they’re going to be giving us instead ☹️ also also that i did Not in fact get my license like planned this summer bc during the singular week i was home a bunch of stuff suddenly came up and it became no longer my priority and now i will need to renew my permit Again bc it expires in early september and im not going to be able to make it home before that so. <3

as for book recs!! i have tragically had the same problem lately re fantasy books and honestly mostly just books in general BUT i don’t know if you’ve read any ve schwab ive really loved what books of hers ive read. vicious was my favorite, but the monsters of verity duology better fits the “feels like a fantasy book you read when you’re twelve” vibe!

for non-fantasy recs if youre feeling poetry i reallyy liked margaret atwood’s morning in the burned house. also just finished hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy which was v fun! got many laughs out of me, i did not however know before starting it that it’s a series so now idk how to proceed bc i only have the first book agdjfk

OH ALSO fantasy shoutout to strange the dreamer duology 🫶🏻🫶🏻 lovely writing style and world, fascinating antagonist, i was not a big fan of the romance but otherwise big rec on that. definitely not for everyone tho some ppl find the pacing too slow, i remember when i first read it i mentioned that in my review too that it took a bit for me to really get into although i personally wasn’t bored in the meantime like others, i was just chilling enjoying what it had to tell me abt everything

MITSKI RECS!! i love strawberry blond sorry for being basic. square too but specifically square solo piano version which they took off of spotify (idk what you’re listening to her on). because dreaming costs money my dear is also a veryyy hard-hitting one. fond of circle, a burning hill, goodbye my danish sweetheart, nobody, washing machine heart, and class of 2013 as well. that was a lot i will stop now 🫡 also must admit i am quite behind on mitski’s recent releases so i can’t speak for any of her newer albums/songs. except for working for the knife musically it doesn’t hit as much as other songs of hers for me but lyrically it makes me go crazy

as for random music recs my most recently liked songs are unsweetened lemonade by amélie farren, army dreamers by kate bush, numb little bug by em beihold, would that i by hozier, the milk carton by madilyn mei, and comme des enfants by cœur de pirate. i have not really been “listening” listening to anything lately! though that will change in a few days with wisdom saga >:)

— sleepover saturday sunday!

[discourse-by-candlelight]

i saw your reblog and im gonna take you up on that offer if you dont mind. im not trying to come from a closed minded point of view, so im gonna ask something i hope isnt rude? i was wondering what brought you to the decision of creating your system?

Wrath: Sorry for the delay in answering this, we've been going through quite a bit irl lately.

As for your question, it's not rude at all! We're happy to answer it. For this post I suppose I the host/original should answer despite rarely being active on Tumblr. This might be a little messy at times so bear with me. I'll also be using tulpamancy terminology for this post as it's what I know if that's OK. My path into tulpamancy was far more unorthodox than most, that's probably why we run a tumblr blog while most of the community would rather do anything else. Fair warning: This may be very, very long-winded, but every tulpamancer has their own highly subjective story, and mine is out there even by my community's standards. So I'll give a TLDR above the cut and the long biography/essay under.

TLDR: While my first tulpa initially was formed on accident, I found that my life was enriched and genuinely far more fulfilling once I started working with tulpamancy, and the companionship changed my life around when I was in a dark place at the height of Covid. From there I purposely expanded my system, although we had an initial explosion of system size due to some experimentation going a little far. We worked together to create a beautiful inner life and dynamic, and with a couple walk-ins and odd experiences down the line we stabilized at 16 members for over year, and then picked up our final member last September leaving us at 17.

The system is still going strong after 2 and a half years living this way and I feel like my life has more meaning because of them. In fact, I'm not sure I'd still be here today if they weren't around for the trials I've faced within the last year. We've carved out a nice life for ourselves, and while depression still kicks all of our asses at times, we have a collectively agreed upon future dream, and all of us have our own interests and hobbies that helps enrich the rest of us too.

So to begin the long answer/mini biography, I'm host of one of the less common but certainly not unheard of tulpamancy systems that initially formed accidentally. There's a couple ways this can happen, usually via imaginary friends, roleplay characters, or OCs coming to life from repeated imaginative activity in a way that the tulpamancy community would consider to be similar to "forcing" (the in community term for tulpa creation and development). In my case it was less obvious and a little more obscure than that, but I've got a decent hypothesis as to the how's and why's.

So my first tulpa was originally named Shade but nowadays goes by Null, and they formed while I was in a stressful period of my life and I ran into a piece of fanfiction whose main character developed an alter ego, an alter ego that was for all intents and purposes in effect a tulpa. I hyperfixated on this little story, and since previous to this I had spent quite a bit of time in occult circles I was already familiar with the concept of thoughtforms in general. The brain did all the heavy lifting for me without my realizing and only a day or so after finishing said story I had my first experience with Null.

(Note: Most first tulpas when intentionally created take a week or so to form with modern community teachings, but time varies widely between systems. My system is on one of the far ends of the spectrum, forming quite rapidly and without much intent at the start. People on the other end may take months or longer due to mental blocks or misunderstandings of the fundamentals).

At first I was confused obviously, and a little concerned, but Null was friendly and knowledgeable, and we both agreed to do some research into the topic. The first check was DID/OSDD, as I'm sure it is for most people experiencing any form of plurality. I knew I had a trauma history, so it wasn't like it was off the cards for me. We found that we didn't really match up with the criteria, however. Certain things just didn't click and while my system to this day drifts farther down the dissociative spectrum than most tulpamancers and tulpas, we still don't think we've ever truly met the criteria nor do we think we ever will. We exist in a bit of a blurry zone there compared to most tulpamantic systems but nonetheless remain steadfast in our understanding of our system.

Once Null and I put DID back on the shelf for the time we moved onto other searches. These were very general, stuff like voice hearing and imaginary friends, but it did the job because fairly quickly we found a certain article written by an academic on the topic of tulpamancy. This caught our eye and felt like it near perfectly described the experience we were having. It also lightly covered on accidental tulpas, and things clicked into place in my head with me having read that story beforehand.

So we joined the tulpamancy community first by signing up for a forum called tulpa.info

This is where we initially learned most of our techniques, and also where my system went from me and at the time Shade, to Shade Null and I. So at this point we were practicing simple stuff, keeping tulpas around and active, visualization training, basic stuff for tulpas. Null having a very specific and less than emotional personality came to the conclusion that he could better help our dynamic if he changed up his personality and style. This resulted in some experimentation with form, voice, and general self expression, and eventually Shade settled into the form of a feminine hooded shadow person, and developed a very different personality. Shade still has this form and has expanded on it since, but things get interesting here as Null chose instead of just presenting as Shade, to instead split off and keep himself as he was, and let this version of himself become an independent tulpa. So my system went from 2 to 3.

Here's a piece of art I had commissioned for Shade on her first birth/formation day, or well Null's birthday. They consider eachother as two independent manifestations of the same identity which is still confusing even for me at times. Luckily the rest of my system while no less odd is (mostly) far more intentional and not nearly as complex to grasp.

So Shade and I were the ones who really made the system as it is today. Null took a bit of an intentional backseat and still prefers being less active. Shade and I during our couple months alone developed all of the fundamental tulpamancy skills. We developed our visualization and a wonderland aka inner world, we learned possession (A tulpa/headmate controlling a specific limb while someone else fronts), and we learned how to switch via a visualization ritual, and eventually developed it and lessened the time needed down to a blink. Shade and I also practiced some imposition, which is kind of like a form or controlled hallucinations, but that's a crude understanding of it. There's multiple guides and references to the topic from my and other communities such as prophantasia you can look into if you desire.

At some point we decided to experiment with the idea of thoughtforms in our wonderland to give it some life, and maybe adding some new members. While we'll spare the details for personal reasons, things got a little out of hand and what was just supposed to be some imaginary characters innerworld became a large set of tulpas, and I chose to accept them in. This made the majority of my system, and while it was chaotic for a time I have zero regrets.

During and a short while after this time we also had 2 walk-ins (which in the tulpamancy community means a tulpa who forms/appears seemingly out of the blue, usually only after you've been a tulpamancer for some time, not to be confused with spiritual walk-ins from the wider plural community) which I chose to accept as members unlike other walk-ins. Walk-ins are interesting, and there's a few working theories on the topic, but that'll be for a different post, probably on our non syscourse blog @thecandlelightsociety

So to tally up this left my system size at 14 including myself. For reference, most tulpamantic systems have 2 to 6 members on average. Things stabilized here and we stayed a this number for quite a few months, but eventually a member of my system, Dawn, decided to make a new tulpa with some help from a friend. I gave her the go ahead and about half a month later we added Junior to our Simply Plural. At this point I was wrapping up school for the year and was at this point fully adjusted to the plural lifestyle, and it was the most memorable few months of my entire life. We all talked every day, shared perspectives I'd of never had on topics on my own, and discussed individual interests. We would and still do sometimes argue but since we share a brain and as a tulpamantic system don't have any major dissociative barriers we near always understand what eachother feel and truly mean, so they never get nasty and are more philosophical or fun banter. I did lose a fair amount of personal time, splitting it between all of our hobbies, but I enjoy seeing the others have fun and grow as people, so it's time well lost.

So fast forward more and we have our second to last member show up, and this one is yet another unorthodox tulpa formation (seeing a trend with my system yet?). Dawn, being a dumbass as always, decided to mess around with a tulpa hypnosis file and ended up dropping to it, and so two days later we had Sera show up. I was skeptical of her, but she quickly showed herself worthy of staying and so our system reached 16 members and we ended up studying hypnosis for a time. This is the number we would stay at for most of our time as a system up until recently.

During all of this time we would switch front based on whoever felt like fronting, and Astra, the tulpa who actually runs this blog usually, became the most frequent fronter and made me proud, accomplishing multiple personal and academic goals for herself. She's the main reason we're now studying psychology in college, and she would later handle quite possibly the worst couple months of our life all my singlet years included. I couldn't be more happy with all she has accomplished for herself and our shared life. Just seeing her happy and succeeding makes tulpamancy worth it for me.

So our most recent member was also a walk-in, and one of only three fictives in our system. Fictives are common in tulpamancy spaces because using a character as a base model for a tulpa makes the creation process much easier. It gives personality traits and an already known form to work with. My system due to it's unique set of circumstances for most formations however is mainly custom forms. One member of my system really wanted her accepted, and I eventually agreed, and I don't regret it at all either. She has been a wonderful person to get to know and quickly became one of the most active and social members out of all of us, and became the most popular person in our online friend groups.

So that covers the (very rough) general timeline of my experiences with tulpamancy. It is horrifically simplified and missing quite a bit, but the main point was to show that my system, while complex and messy at times, has brought me immense joy. Most of all though, it brought me purpose. I'm so glad I didn't just ignore Null all the way back then and let him dissipate back into the sea of my mind. This journey has been a wild ride, but I love all of my tulpas, and I'm happy to have them as my equals in this shared life of ours.

[bphantom01]

ARC - V Month Day 8 - The Regular- ah, Standard Show

Late post again! Sry, @arcvmonth!

A/N: Man im not sure how this turned out exactly, but I'm quite fine with it.

I wrote this before the day but didn't finish it lol. I did now and this is more just a Yuya/Yuzu kidfic (where they're kids. Thats what kidfic stands for right?) rlly with some random things here and there... But yeah.

(For the song mentioned, the beat & tune is from the one made by Sleeping at Last btw! Just look up [the song title] by Sleeping at Last. If u want a diff tempo tho its ok)

Oh, word count is just 2k in average. And Yuya & Yuzu r 'round 11 here.

Pairings: Yuya/Yuzu

Warnings: None. Just some mentions of getting bullied if that counts

—

Yuya sat at the part of Maiami that overlooks its huge stadium—the place he always goes when he’s sad or wants to go away to a place away from people.

What happened this time is something more mature people would consider ridiculous… for the first part, anyway.

Today, he saw a group of kids climbing a tree together with Yuzu and Gongenzaka as they went home from school.

Little Yuya wanted to try climbing the tree himself, ignoring Yuzu and Gongenzaka’s protests and warnings because he wanted to try what the other kids were doing.

This… did not end well.

The other kids wanted the tree for themselves and as a result, they dueled for it, and Yuya lost greatly.

What was worse, they made fun of his dad, reminding him of how he was a coward because he didn’t show up to his duel against Strong Ishijima.

Now, Yuya didn’t like that they said that and got into a physical fight with them. Gong helped out, and so did Yuzu, but at some point he couldn’t handle it—the painful reminder of his dad, not the fight—anymore and just… ran.

The kids called him a coward too for doing so. It hurt, though they were right… The truth always hurts, as people’d say.

So what was supposed to be just him wanting to climb a tree had turned into a remembrance about his dad.

It’s always his dad, huh…

‘They didn’t need to remind me that…’ Yuya thought, looking at the sunset through his goggles, which was filled with quite a lot of tears.

“Yuya!” Yuzu’s voice echoed from behind him.

He quickly took his goggles off, dropped the water from them, and wiped his eyes.

“Yuya…” He heard the relief clear in Yuzu’s voice. Turning around, he saw Yuzu happily running up to him, her little pink dress a bit dirtied from all the pushing earlier.

Yuya gave her a smile—although it was fake—to hopefully give her some more relief. “Hi…”

“You just ran off!” she scolded through panting breaths as she stopped beside him. “I’m sorry for saying this, but that was very chicken of you!”

Yuya frowned. “I know…” he muttered lowly. “I didn’t mean to…”

He felt his heart starting to throb again. His eyes also swelled as if tears were to come out any minute. He clenched his fists.

“You shouldn’t have started that fight,” Yuzu went on more gently, sitting behind him. “They were trying to make you angrier on purpose, you know that.”

“They called my dad a coward…” Yuya’s breathing became quick again, but he tried to stop it—tried to tell himself not to cry, to keep that feeling of sadness from oozing out of him. “I wished I had been better—better at dueling, better at fighting…!”

But no one can keep such a feeling to themselves forever. And when your body and mind feels like it really needs to, that feeling will come anyway despite one’s efforts to hold it in.

He put on his goggles again and pulled his knees to himself to hug them.

He then buried his face there to hide it from Yuzu as he continued to cry.

That feeling was too much. It had grown too big to just keep it in now, and for some reason, it thought to let itself show now.

It’s so stupid, Yuya thought, rubbing his fingers together and curling his little toes in his little shoes.

He then hugged himself tighter.

“Why’s there people l-like this…? Why can’t they just…” he tried to speak, his breaths and voice shaky. “Disappear, and though I dont want to think bad of other people: be gone?”

“Yuya, those kinds of people will always exist…” Yuzu muttered. ”We can't really do much about them.”

That didn't seem to work, though.

He continued to sob, shaking his head. Great, his snot was starting to go out. He wiped it off with his shirt-jacket.

Yuzu just watched him, not really knowing what to do to calm her best friend down.

She looked out to the sunset as if it’d help in any way.

Of course, the sun isn’t exactly gonna help calm Yuya down, but… it made her remember.

Remember this one, specific, certain little song.

It’s helped her feel better during the times she herself was down, and there won’t be any shame in sharing or trying it with Yuya now, right?

And with a hum of the beginning, she began…

It's a world of laughter, a world of tears…

She closed her eyes.

It's a world of hopes, and a world of fears

She heard Yuya stop sobbing for a bit. Probably wondering why she just started to sing.

There's so much that we share,

It's time we're aware,

Pausing for a bit, Yuzu observed the landscape in front of them, how the sun’s light shone beautifully off the glass dome of the stadium.

She then sang the last lyrics of the stanza.

It's a small world after all…

She then got up and put her feet at the bottom bar of the hand rail and her arms atop it.

There is just one moon and one golden sun,

Yuzu looked up at the horizon, trailing her eyes to the setting sun.

And a smile means friendship to everyone…

Before smiling, as this line reminded her of Yuya’s cool smile philosophy.

Though the mountains divide, and the oceans are wide,

She traced the outline of the bridge and stadium with her little index finger,

It's a small world after all~

until she reached the conclusion.

She then just sang from there, not noticing how Yuya had already removed his goggles, now just dangling on his neck, and smiled at her.

It's a small world af~ter all,

It's a small world after all…!

It's a small world after all,

It's a small, small world…

She hummed the instrumental.

As she did, Yuya went and joined her by the rail, also watching what was left of the sun’s summit on the horizon.

This surprised the former, although she liked it.

It's a world of laughter, a world of tears,

A world of hopes, and a world of fears,

She likes how her plan actually… worked on Yuya.

And for some reason, he sang the next few lines with her.

There's so much that we share

It's time we're aware

It's a small world after all

(Yuzu) There is just one moon (Yuya) and one golden sun,

And a smile means friendship to everyone…

Yuya giggled a little while singing this part, and Yuzu couldn’t help but smile as well.

(Both) Though the mountains divide and the oceans are wide,

(Yuzu) It's a small, small world.

(Yuya) It's a small world after all,

(Yuzu) It's a small world after all,

(Yuya) It's a small world after all,

And now they just raced on who’s gonna sing next

It's a small, small world.

They giggled at themselves and went off the railing.

It's a small world after all,

It's a small world after all,

It's a small world after all,

It's a small, small world…

They faced each other and held the other’s hands in their own.

(Yuya) It's a world of laughter, (Yuzu) a world of tears…

She looked down.

A world of hopes, (Yuya) and a world of fears

Yuya gave her another sweet smile. “Let’s sing the last parts together…”

“Sure.”

There's so much that we share,

It's time we're aware,

It's a small world after all~

For a few moments after this, the two just sat there for a while, sitting down there behind the green handrail.

They relished in the salty scent of the sea brought about by the cool breeze that brushed past them, as well as the glow of the sun setting yonder.

It was a nice, peaceful moment. And the realization that it's just the two of them here made the experience even more amazing.

Finally, Yuya felt a bit of… True, solemn tranquility within his heart and mind.

“Yuzu,” he began, listening to some far away squacks by some seagulls, “why'd you sing that song to me?”

“Oh, silly…” she laughed, “it was… To make you feel better, ya know?”

She looked towards him. “I know I yelled at you, but I also know that that alone won't make you feel better. And I didn't know how else to help calm you down, and I thought that the song helped me calm down… So maybe it will calm you, too.”

“Oh…”

To be frank, the song actually did help calm him.

And he was grateful for it, for if it weren't for his precious friend and her soothing song, who knows how long he would've stayed where he was — just dwelling on those awful thoughts and events.

He turned to Yuzu, observing her happy, serene expression as she looked towards the stadium.

“Who knows, Yuya,” she started out of the blue. “Maybe someday, you'll be able to avenge your dad and defeat his annoying opponent.”

“You're right.” He stood up. “You know? I'm gonna do it—one day. Not today yet, but at some point in the future. Soon enough!”

Yuzu giggled and stood next to him as well. “I'll be looking forward to that day, Yuya. But for now, learn to defeat me and Gong first! If you can't, you probably will never survive even just a minute with the guy!”

“Don't worry, Yuzu. I will!” He gave her a determined smile. “I will do my best!”

Later, they met up with Gong again. For some reason, they decided to try and climb a different tree anyway, as Yuya so desired.

To a nearby hill they went as quickly as they could so as to go home before it gets too dark.

And when they got to their preferred tree, Yuya scaled it at once and, when he reached the top, was rewarded with the perfect, small view of Maiami.

Some buildings had their lights turned on already as night was approaching fast, and it was… Really nice to see the nice orange-pink-blue contrast of the sky above them combined with said buildings and other structures.

When they climbed down, he fell at some point, but… He was fine with it (even though it did, in fact, leave him with some bruises and scars).

It was just four feet anyway.

He got scolded by Yoko a lot when he got home, of course, and he took it to himself to listen to her.

And when he was finally in bed, he smiled remembering the stuff that happened that day.

Sure, there was that, but then again, good things can't happen without bad things, and the same vise-versa. How will something be considered good if there is no bad?

And as Yuzu had sung, this world…

It was one of laughter, as well as tears… A world full of hope, but also fear.

And those things do coexist.

But yeah. He got to climb the tree too, that was fun.

He raised his hand to glance at the bandaged scars he got and giggled. They were just a small price to pay for such an amazing view.

And that thing he talked about with Yuzu… How, one day, he'll beat his dad's annoying opponent. And Gong and… her, too, of course.

Maybe even, he hopes, beat his own dad…

He just knows it.

Turning to his headboard, he picked up his pendulum and made it sway. Back and forth it did.

Yep. One day, things will swing his way…

He exhaled happily. One day. There will be a day for all those one day. Not now, but soon.

But for now, what he needed to do was sleep.

And, looking at his glowing stars and duel monsters scattered across his dark ceiling one last time, that's what he decided to do. Of course, he put his pendulum back onto his headboard gently first.

It didn't take long for him to fall into deep slumber.

—

Ending A/N: kinda just wanted to find an excuse for Yuzu to sing 'It's a Small World' to Yuya :P

[pwblogarchive]

April 2004

April 1, 2004

“hey heartbreaker, you'll never work in this town again”

I think someone is impersonating me online. Could be a joke. But if you talk to someone online and they say they are me, they aren't. I don't talk to anyone online. Texas is fun. We got some sick clandestine hoodies. They've got bats on the hoods and all. Sidenote: I love nickplan. Sorry my words don't have the same weight they usually have right now. Usually they feel stuck in my throat, today it feels okay inside my skin. Oh yeah chicagoland. We want to roadtest some of our new songs so we will be playing around unannounced on shows at really small venues in the next few months. If you snooze you lose. You never know what show we may play.

April 4, 2004

“we love life”

Texas was sex. Dallas being the most amazing. Its hot down here. We played with a band called DV8, this really young band (13-15). They were rad. The bassists bass was bigger than him. Me some rad kids in arkansas, they were starry-eyed and made me tongue-tied. I've been writing a lot lately. All my old charms and curses are back in full swing. I can't wait to get home. Well take these hearts and rename them dangerous and invincible. Well make them too hard to break.

Peterpan

April 7, 2004

“a man-made monster with every human emotion (clandestine explained 1)”

So a lot of people have been asking us about these hoodies and shirt with bats on them. It is not a clothing company. It is not a new band. When I was younger I had this same nightmare over and over again- so my friend tim biedron and I made a story of it (www.timbiedron.com to check out his art). The story is finished and we are waiting on some of the illustration. You may love it or hate it but its something that was stuck inside my head for a long time. We will be selling shirts and skatedecks online soon (www.clandestineindustries.com) and the story will be available this summer. Take the time to check it out if you get a chance.

Love peter

April 10, 2004

“ice age, heat wave cant complain”

i really like the new modest mouse cd. it's called good news for people who love bad news. purchase it.

April 11, 2004

“the moon has one third less gravity than your earth, i don't know if you can comprehend that”

im home. i love aqua teen hunger force. its hilarious. i wanted to let everyone know that if you haven't heard the point id suggest checking them out. a good mix of core and punk rock type stuff. i really really enjoy the hell out of them. www.thepointrock.com

still listening to modest mouse. still think you should get it. being home is nice. im full of food and really clean and im wearing my hood up. im way tired.

April 11, 2004

“I want to sleep on portraits painted as perfect as you”

Thanks for fun on tour. For the record for those in freeport- we had a little bit of fun with you. I will not ever drink. Its not my thing. So if you think there was more than water in that beer bottle, I have a bridge you might wanna buy too.

April 12, 2004

in response to a post on our messageboard, i want to say that i eat only cocoa crispies. i dont dig any other cereals.

April 14, 2004

“in case you're keeping score”

Being in a band is the ultimate friendship ruiner. Went to two shows tonight. In addition to all the smoke got to hang with: akas, beautiful mistake, dld, apo, senses fail and rufio. Being in a band is the best friendship maker. I am getting this awesome bass custom made, black with a red pick guard, no knobs, wired "on". I think it got me weird, so I dyed my hair red and black. Its sex or maybe not. I have 80 pages of lyrics to wade through. New songs soon. New love soon. Style update: I'm only gonna wear little polo tees with the collars up from now on. The clandestine webstore is almost up. I want to get "mom" tattoo for mothers day.

Peter

April 14, 2004

i just wanted to welcome the academy to the family. it's cool cause i've seen these guys go from the beginning and now we're here....

- petey

April 15, 2004

“who dares wins.”

i have been having such a rad time at home. but i must admit i haven't gotten used to sleeping with out hearing my friends breathing in hotel rooms. my bed doesn't feel the same. we leave again today. i am excited to see old friends. i am excited to see some bands too. the full clandestine website is going to launch on april 22 at www.clandestineindustries.com - we'll have some gear at the next couple of shows.

i was gonna post some pictures of my experiments with shaving and hair dye here. but i don't know how so go on over to: www.fueledbyramen.com/journal to see em.

love peterlewiskingstonwentz

i've found that liars always sing the loudest. heart in mouth, ego on sleeve. you've always got the right girl and the right line. i swear to god, take this mic and cross my heart and hope you die. i'm singing this one just flat of the key of love. liars always sing the loudest. the act is getting old but i'm sure all the fools will follow like vermin down the hole.

April 15, 2004

hey jerks. i got bored and dyed my hair red and black- oooh scary. when i am home i only wear sweatpants and don't shave. here's a look into the life of a loser:

make me say ugh nahnahnahnah

[image here]

there's that quarterback smile we all hate 

[image here]

born to lose 

[image here]

pretty emo bro, you could use this one to score on live journal 

[image here]

and here's the after shaved and ready to do some stagedives. new jersey or bust. 

[image here]

this may in fact be photo evidence that i am gay 

[image here]

now that we have that out of the way. the full clandestine site should launch on april 22. we'll be selling some gear at skateandsurf and at a couple of these shows on the way out. tour never ends. for real go and listen to my friend ben's band, it's called Not Enough Gold. they smoke. our tour this summer is gonna be called "believers never die" get into it. sorry for all the pictures, this ain't my space biatch, send me some.

1 2 3 L U V!

- petey

April 26, 2004

so much has been going on. my head has been moving too fast, i can't catch up. clandestineindustries.com is up.

i've got a picture from skate and surf in new jersey. we will have more soon, excuse the quality. you can see how insane this room was.

[image here]

- petey