#sorry if this ended up being too about me
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Loved your writing of arcane characters saying things they regret during an argument. Would you be willing to do a version with Jayce, Viktor and Silco? I apologize if you don't prefer to write about these characters, you can ignore this
Arcane men saying things they'll regret during an argument. | Viktor, Jayce, Silco x Gn!Reader
Oh, I absolutely am willing to do that, Anon!! These are going to be pretty irredeemable, though, so there is not going to be a part two to this... anyways, enjoy!!<3
Content: Season 2 spoilers!!, heavy angst, hurt/no comfort, break ups, swearing, gaslighting, toxic behavior, sfw
Reader has no mentioned pronouns.
((Not proofread))
》VIKTOR
"This... isn't you anymore, Viktor. A-And I refuse to keep lying to myself like this either!" You hissed out one night, unable to keep it in any longer. You were losing your mind in this compound of his, unable to understand how seemingly no one was able to recognize how wrong everything was. People who were "healed" by him weren't the same after. They turned into robotic and uncanny husks of their old selves.
A terrifying sight that unnerved you deeply. And only you here.
The nail in the coffin was perhaps the skeptical appearance of Councilor Salo. Never in your life had you ever seen him give a damn about anyone but himself. He lived a life of riches and materialism, far from the selfless and minimalistic lifestyle found here. But after your boyfriend healed him of his inability to walk, he suddenly preached the same ideals that everyone else did.
Peace, love, and community.
Those were the important pillars of this idyllic place Viktor had created, and yet you couldn't see past the clear red flags that weaved themselves in their white attire. You were never much of a genius like he was, but it didn't take much brainpower to understand that this was not a great place to be in. No matter how hard he attempted to convince you of that.
"... I'm sorry you feel that way. But I'm afraid I can not follow your reasoning for this claim. I am myself... just someone greater. More meaningful. Isn't that beautiful?" His voice was so gentle and patient in comparison to yours. Something that wasn't unusual to him. But the way he used that tone now made you sick. "Terrifying is a better word, actually... Why can't you see that this is just wrong? You're not healing anyone-" "-But I am. Look around you. Is that not enough for you to finally believe me, my love? I want to create a better world... one in which we can live freely together." Your mind spun, his words ringing in your head dangerously. And you hated every second of it.
This isn't the man you loved anymore. He must have died that fateful day when the sky fell from above, and he covered you with his body to save you. His last act of kindness as your boyfriend and lover before he perished and left behind whoever he was. And you'd be damned if the last good memory got tainted too.
"No. I will not let you play with my mind anymore. I've had enough." You pushed past him, wanting to finally escape this borderline cult. Originally, you had only followed after him because you couldn't bear being without him. Jayce was right, though. He really was different now.
"Hm... it seems like I was right about you after all." You stopped in your tracks yet didn't dare face him. "You truly are not worth saving... you can't grasp the beauty of what I have made. I suppose everyone's claims for your low intelligence were, unfortunately, right. What a shame." How could a devil have such a soothing, loving voice? Why did the monster that now lurked in your shadow have to have your lovers face? The cruelty was too much to bear.
Who would have thought that you'd finally leave him for good after all the years you've taken care of him? This moment felt so surreal and yet ironically freeing as well. The end was near. "Did you... ever even love me?" You asked aimlessly, but didn't wait to hear his answer.
Perhaps if you had, however, you would've seen that sudden spark of surprise in his eyes, as you slipped out of his fingers for good at last.
》JAYCE
You had looked everywhere for him. And after also asking everyone under the sun if they had seen your boyfriend, you had eventually determined that he must've somehow gone missing. Worried sick, it pained you knowing that there wasn't much you could do either, considering that everyone was too busy getting ready for a borderline war and Caitlyn became unreachable as a result. Yet just as you began to lose hope, your dear lover finally returned... but he wasn't the same.
He didn't look the same, nor did he act the same, in fact. He looked so different that it even visibly startled you when you found him rummaging through his once shared laboratory. You had just returned from another wrap around the building in hopes of finding it, and whilst you'd consider yourself lucky this time around, all you now felt was genuine dread.
"Jayce...? What happened to you? I looked for you everywhere and-" You stilled at the intense look he gave you, his face flinching for a moment, as though his mind couldn't comprehend your image. Glancing over at his peculiar weapon of choice, you felt unnerved at how even that looked uncanny. The entire situation was unnerving you deeply, to say the least. "You... You shouldn't be here." He finally muttered, his voice deeper and colder than it ever was. Jayce always had such a fun and warm voice. If you didn't know any better, you would've questioned who he was a while ago.
"Hey... tell me where you were, okay?" You said, trying a more gentle approach as you neared him, eyes focused on his clearly injured leg. Had he been kidnapped? You doubted it. So what made him end up like this? Nothing you could come with explained his appearance. His hair and beard were way longer than they should have gotten in the short span of time he was gone, too.
Reaching down carefully, you tried to inspect his leg, but he seemed less receptive to the idea. Or so you assumed, after he shoved you away roughly and held the hammer to your face at impressive speed. His eyes were glossy, as though he wasn't entirely all there. He was reliving a terrifying moment in his mind, unaware of the horror you were going through. Never could you have ever thought of ending up in this position with him. "Jayce! What the hell are you doing-?" "-Get away! I know what you are... you've been sent by him too, weren't you?" You let out a shriek when he swung the hammer at you, only giving you a fraction of a second to jump out of the way.
Falling onto your behind, you quickly crawled backward and away from him, tears welling up in your eyes. Your scream seemed to at least wake him up, though, as he finally lowered his weapon and blinked at you in surprise. "Fucks sake! What is wrong with you?" You yelled out, yet as fast as his face softened, it hardened again. "... Sorry... I need to leave." Quickly making his way past you, he only barely escaped your presence before you grabbed onto the fabric of his pants. "Why? Where are you going? Why can't you tell me anything?"
The look in his eyes made you shrink away. This wasn't your Jayce anymore. "... The future of everyone in Piltover hinges on me being there on time. Now, make yourself useful for once and get out of my way." Shaking you off harshly, he left you crying on the cold floor of the once lively laboratory, not once looking back.
》SILCO
When you first met Silco, you were both still leading simple lives in the last drop with his brother and all of your other friends in Zaun. The lanes were harsh and, at times, cruel, yet you fought through the agony of it all together. Years down the line later, you find yourself still reminiscing on those heavenly days, particularly those of your lover who had turned for the worst in the time being. And the question of why you didn't listen to Vander's warnings came to mind again then. Perhaps you were just too used to excusing everything his brother did, especially after he had attempted to drown him so horrifically, which left him permanently injured.
But even so... why didn't you just listen? Why did it take so many years for you to finally throw the towel and leave for good? Finally realise that the man you loved was a monster? A disgusting and evil monster who was willing to use the plight of others for his own gain. And for what? Money? Fame? Power? It was all an ego trip you had far more than enough of. Zaun was his playground, and an escape was impossible. You'd be, however damned if you didn't at least try to anyways. Even if just in Vander's honor as a long-awaited apology.
Pushing past the crowd in the stuffy, full Last drop, you finally reached his office upstairs. Not caring about formalities anymore, you knocked and opened the door without awaiting a reply. If death met you behind it, then so be it. "Ah, darling, in a hurry today, aren't you?" "We need to talk. Alone." Short and straight to the point. Raising a brow, he shared a look with Jinx, who was just done giving him his daily "medicine". Oh, how you hated your lover's dearest creation. Shimmer. The exact thing that had ruined your lives for good. But you pushed away your disdain for the task at hand.
Giving Jinx a dismissive wave of his hand, you waited for her to be gone for good before taking a breath to speak. But Silco beat you to it. Always so painfully perceptive. "The answer is no, if you're here asking to leave. I refuse to let you go, dear. You have no one else but me after all. You wouldn't survive on your own." He always underestimated you, so this wasn't an all to surprising response. And if you were just a couple of months younger, you would have maybe agreed and backed off. But you were sick of his games.
"I didn't come here to ask for permission, Silco. I'm here to say goodbye." The slightest, softest crack at the last word gave you away horribly. You certainly didn't expect your feelings for the man to betray you, but even that won't stop you now. Said man just hummed in response as he stood up to face the window. His hands calmly lit a cigar, very much unbothered. But you knew that your sentence had gotten to him anyway with how his hand shook ever so slightly. Out of anger, most likely.
"So you think you can do whatever you want? Leave after you've spent so many years at my side? Your hands aren't as clean as you think they are, darling. Even yours are a bright violet." A reference to the shimmer vials on his desk. He knew how much you hated it, so this felt like a jab. A jab at the deep guilt you felt every day for enabling the death of all of your friends indirectly. If only you had stopped him from the start... then maybe you wouldn't have to feel the dread that ruined you from the inside anymore.
"I've accepted my flaws and sins a long time ago. I may not be better than you... but sometimes, in order to end the cycle, you have to walk away and leave some things behind." You suddenly felt so content, his cold and terrible words not reaching you anymore. You were so close to leaving. So close to leaving Zaun and Piltover like you've always dreamed. But Silco just scoffed in disbelief.
"Hah, don't give me that self-righteous shit... I've been there for you for so many years, dear. I've taken care of you, fed you, and loved you to my best ability for so long. The least you could do is be grateful for my kindness." "So you think I'm a burden?" The silence was deafening, but it was enough to confirm your long-standing suspicions. He had lost his love for you a long time ago. Perhaps the side that loved you so purely drowned in the river with him.
"... Goodbye. I hope one day you can walk away too." You turned and began walking out then, suddenly realising that it's finally over. Shoving your hands into the pocket of your coat, you felt the ticket for the skyship you had to take. "Don't you dare leave. Don't you dare it-" All bark and no bite as usual. There was no stopping you now, and he knew it. He was letting you go after all. You could just hope that one day he'd listen to your words and end the cycle, too.
What a shame that you won't be there at his side to see it, however... maybe in another life then.
#arcane#arcane x genderneutral reader#arcane x reader#arcane x y/n#arcane x you#arcane viktor#arcane viktor x reader#viktor#viktor x reader#arcane silco#arcane silco x reader#silco x reader#silco#arcane jayce#arcane jayce x reader#jayce#jayce x reader
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Uncle sukuna
〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰
Uncle Sukuna hates children and that just makes kids like him more.
They are practically magnetized to the man.
If he was being honest, he's really just afraid of hurting them, that and he has no idea how to handle a crying child. So, he avoids them at all cost.
Sometimes there's just nothing he can do though, especially when a little monster like his nephew is napping on his chest.
Which he does frequently.
Sukuna would be mean. Straight up telling the kid he was annoying. Yuuji would almost never care.
Almost.
“Don’t even think about it you little brat.” Sukuna would protest, seeing Yuuji crawling across the sofa. “Nu uh. No. Get your sticky little hands off of me!”
But eventually he would have to give in, rolling his eyes as Yuuji found his place- drooling over Sukuna’s shoulder.
Sukuna was also the type to say no and never mean it.
“Can we watch my show kuna?”
“No.”
Five minutes later? They’re smooshed together watching Yuuji’s stupid cartoon.
“Uncuna… can you help with my math homework please?”
“No.”
The next second Sukuna is in full tutor mode.
You might think that he’s the type to make a kid cry over their geometry work, but he is typically more patient than expected.
“Kuna can you make me some cinnamon toast?”
“No.”
“Pleaseeeee?????”
“No, Yuuji.” He’s firm.
Yuuji knows he’s getting that toast.
Sukuna has a love hate relationship with the kid. For Yuuji, it’s just love. That’s why, on the rare occasion, Sukuna might be just a little too rough on him.
It would likely be after a long day, maybe he worked late, maybe he had to deal with a rude person, maybe he didn’t sleep well. Whatever the case, the tattooed man would have an already short fuse when he walked in the door.
Unaware of his bad mood, Yuuji would flip around on the sofa, hearing the key turn in the door.
“KUNA!!!”
Yuuji would bound off the couch, racing for his uncle. Sukuna would sigh and roll his eyes as the boys grubby little hands encircled his leg.
“Kuna kuna! I had a presentation at school today! And I did a really good job because everybody clapped at the end like this-“ the boy smacks his hands together over and over, a big smile on his face, “I was so nervous but now that it’s all over, I wish I could do it again! It was so fun! I can’t wait for my next presentation-“
“Oh my gosh Yuuji will you shut up? I really do not care about your school project.” Sukuna would know the second it left his mouth it wouldn’t be true.
Yuujis little arms would fall away from his uncle. A frown would cover his face. “O-oh okay.” He would stumble back, watching his uncles face.
Sukuna would groan inwardly. Knowing he had been too harsh. He never actually minded hearing about his nephews day, he was just overstimulated and now he felt awful. The little boy was holding up a strong facade but his lip wobbled. The man would sigh.
“Ugh, Yuuji, I’m sorry kid, that was wrong of me-“
“No.” The boy would sniffle, “s’okay. M’sorry for making you mad.”
Oh, now Sukuna might as well walk into oncoming traffic.
He sighs, “No, Yuuji, you didn’t do a thing wrong. Don’t apologize for anything, alright?” He would run a hand through his cropped pink hair, “listen, I’m glad your presentation went well, that’s good, how about we go get dinner after I wash up, whatever ya want.”
Yuujis eyes would widen, a big grin coming back, “Yeah?!” Sukuna would sigh at the kids forgiving nature.
“Yeah, kid, I’m starved.”
Yuuji would bounce up and down, then, without a moment’s hesitation, throw himself around his uncles leg.
Sukuna would pat the boys hair, cursing himself for being so short with the kid.
And after being so annoyed just a second ago, after watching Yuuji race off to change his clothes, Sukuna realized he had forgotten what had ruined his day to begin with.
Cute little brat.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fluff#jjk angst#sukuna imagine#ryoumen sukuna#jjk sukuna#jujutsu sukuna#sukuna ryomen#jujutsu kaisen sukuna#soft sukuna#uncle sukuna#yuuji fluff#itadori yuuji#jjk yuuji#jujutsu kaisen yuuji#jjk itadori#jujutsu itadori#yuji itadori#sukuna x itadori#sukuna x yuuji#sukuna fluff#yuuji angst#sukuna angst#jjk au#jjk imagines#unkuna#jjk fanfic#jjk fanart#ryomen sukuna fluff#sukuna fanfic
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Okay hear me out Agatha x Reader age gap fic. The reader and Agatha have been together for awhile I was thinking like she used to be your college professor before you graduated, The reader has a monthly night out scheduled with friends from school but Agatha like usual declines in your offer to join you all. Agatha just doesn’t have interest in the “young people bars” and hanging out with old students is strange to her, though it’s a little upsetting you don’t push too much before relenting and going on your way. A little bit into the night despite your efforts in avoiding said persons advances you’re being continuously hit on by either a stranger in the bar or a friend from the group that is your choice! But the resolve would be Agatha showing up cause she felt guilty about always declining, her witnessing and then defusing the situation (jealously obviously). I absolutely love possessive Agatha and love everything you’ve written so far! Whether it ends in smut is also completely up to you!!!
Hope you enjoy and thank you for the very detailed request!! This will be a two-parter and the next part will be based on a request I got about jealous reader x Professor Agatha.
A lesson in jealousy (Part 1)
Agatha gets jealous when she finds you at a bar and a guy is already talking to you.
Word count: 2100
Tags: marking, jealousy, making out, slight thigh grinding
“I was thinking of ordering pizza for tonight?” Agatha muses, already looking at you when you turn your head to face her.
You’re sitting on the couch in her office, nose buried in a book for one of your other classes. Agatha was your professor two years ago and there had been a spark, at least on your end, so you had kept in touch.
It wasn’t until a year ago when you had bridged the gap between a professional relationship and something more when you had kissed her one night after getting drinks at a bar across town.
You had immediately pulled back, apologizing incessantly, but much to your surprise, she had dragged you back in for more.
That night was the first of many that you spent in her bed.
Although she was no longer your teacher, you still attended the college that she worked at, so there was a bit of a gray area. Meaning, you two had to keep it under wraps.
“Oh, sorry,” you say, finally answering Agatha’s question. “I’m going out with my friends tonight. It’s our monthly bar trivia thing that we always do. I think I told you.” She hums and you frown. “What?”
Agatha shrugs. “Seems like we haven’t had a quiet night in awhile, that’s all.”
“You could always come tonight,” you offer hopefully. Her nose wrinkles and she raises an eyebrow and you know why she’s being like this. “You could just happen to show up and I’ll just happen to see you and I’ll invite you to join our team. It’ll be fun!”
And yet you know her answer before she even says it. “That’s not really my scene, baby.” You pout and slouch down further into the couch. She has never once taken you up on an invitation, even though you practically beg her every time. She rolls her eyes exasperatedly. It’s an old game for both of you. “Come on, hon, you know I have no interest in going to a bar with a bunch of college kids on a Friday night where everyone will be drinking and making noise and I taught most of your friends. I just think that it will be weird.”
A flash of anger bubbles up to protect you from the hurt you feel deep down. Would it kill her to do something for you? “I’m also a college kid who will be out drinking and ‘making noise’ and you were my professor two years ago. Is that weird?”
She sighs heavily and pushes her chair back, patting her thighs. She wants you to come over, but you grit your teeth and don’t give in. “Of course not. That’s not what I meant, obviously. Just spending my Friday evening with a bunch of college kids isn’t what I’ve wanted to do for a long time.”
You stand up, shoving your books and laptop in your bag and Agatha scoffs and says your name. You meet her eyes, disappointment written all over your face. It kills you to show her how much her rejection hurts, but you’re tired of it.
“Come here, please,” she says softly. You grumble but obey. You slide off your backpack and sit on her laps, tensely putting your arms around her neck. Despite how mad you are, you still fiddle with her strands on her nape that aren’t in her bun. She leans in to kiss your lips but you don’t let it go any further than a press of her mouth against yours. You won’t give in that easily.
“You never come,” you whine.
She tucks a piece of hair behind your ear. “I know, sweetheart. I just worry it might be risky for us to be seen out in public like that. Why don’t you come over after and we can have a movie night or something? I’ll take you to a bar tomorrow night, I promise. Just the two of us.”
You can see there’s no use trying to fight her on this. No matter what you say, she won’t come with you and you’d rather not have to open up and tell her how you want to just spend a night with the most important people in your life: Agatha and your best friends. You also feel a little insecure about being so young. She is over twice your age and you worry that sometimes you aren’t enough for her, or that she thinks you’re too immature. “Okay,” you say, voice small.
She squeezes your waist and gives you another peck. “That’s my girl. Don’t come over too late and I’ll make it worth your while.” She winks and you force a smile and climb off her lap.
“I’ll see you later, Agatha.”
“Hon, you don’t have to leave right now,” she calls but you’re already walking to the door. You wave a hand as a goodbye and you moodily walk back to your dorm.
You sulk the rest of the day and debate whether or not you even want to go out to the bar, but ultimately decide that you deserve it. You don’t need Agatha to have a good time, as much as you’d like her.
“There she is! It’s been awhile!” Natasha exclaims when you get to their table and claps a hand on your back. You wince but pull her in for a hug. You’ve been swamped with homework and when you do have free time, it’s spent with Agatha, so you have barely seen your friends in the past month.
“Sorry, I’ve been so busy,” you mumble while greeting Wanda and Maria, also at the table.
“First round is on you for neglecting us!” Wanda says and you laugh and happily go to the bar to order beers for the group.
“What can I get you?” The bartender asks when you finally make your way through the crowd.
“Four Pilsners, please,” you almost have to shout. Someone next to you bumps into you roughly and you jump.
“Oh shit, sorry.” A guy about your age turns around, with shaggy dark hair and blue eyes. Something about his features is so familiar.
“You’re good,” you say. “Do I know you?”
He stares intently at your face, trying to place you. He snaps his fingers. “Professor Harkness’s class, freshman year. Something about witchcraft. I sat in the row in front you. You were like the only one who actually knew what they were talking about. I think you were her favorite by a long shot.”
You blush at hearing that someone else picked up on Agatha liking you. “I don’t know if I’d say that,” you say coyly, smiling a little at the thought of the older woman.
“I’m James. So, uh,” the boy says, sliding a hand nonchalantly around your waist. You freeze. “What’s a pretty girl like you doing all alone at a bar?”
“I’m not alone,” you quickly say, stepping back so his hand falls off, and you point to the table with your friends. “We’re here for trivia night.”
His face lights up and he motions toward a different table with a group of guys. “We are too, but they all suck. Can I join your team?”
“Um-” You’re trying to figure out how to let him down gently when the bartender puts down the four beers in front of you. You reach for your wallet but James slaps a $20 on the counter.
“I got it,” he says proudly and then before you can protest, he grabs two of the beers and you follow with the other drinks, dumbfounded, as he walks over to your table. Your friends give you quizzical looks but you just shrug tiredly. You can’t find it in yourself to care that much right now.
The host of the trivia game comes around to each table and hands out the paper for answers and a pen. He asks the first question: when is Taylor Swift’s birthday.
You immediately say the answer and James pats his hand on your shoulder but it turns into more of a rub. Your eyes widen and your friends bite back a smile.
“I’m actually seeing someone,” you say and take his hand off of you. Your friends look even more surprised than he does. Even though you’ve been dating Agatha for close to a year now, you’ve been really secretive and change the topic whenever your love life comes up with them.
“Come on, baby, don’t be like that,” he says, raising his arms like he’s trying to show you that he’s harmless. He moves to touch you again but a hand darts out and grabs his wrist. You turn and your jaw falls open.
It’s Agatha, and she is positively fuming.
“I think she said she’s taken,” she growls and James backs off.
“Professor Harkness,” he stutters. “I wasn’t trying to do anything, we were just having a good time.” He turns to you, eyes pleading. It’s almost funny how scary he still finds the older woman. “Tell her, we were just talking.”
You wish he had said anything but that. Agatha whirls onto you. “Were you?” She hisses and you gulp. She scoffs as you protest and storms out of the bar.
Ignoring the looks from your friends, you chase after her down the alleyway.
“Agatha, wait,” you yell. “He kept hitting on me and I was trying to let him down gently but he kept trying. I told him that I was with someone else! I’m sorry.”
She spins on her heel and advances toward you. You stop like a deer in headlights and she shoves you against the brick wall before you can think. Her hands grab your wrists and pin them to the wall. You struggle futilely.
“Is this your pathetic attempt of getting back at me?” You furrow your brows in confusion and she laughs sardonically. “I was feeling so guilty earlier. You looked so sad when I didn’t want to come and I thought that maybe I could try, for you. I always say no and what a nice surprise it would be for my girlfriend if I showed up. And then what do I find? My pet is flirting with someone else. Not just someone, a sleazy college boy who would probably cum after two pumps because he’s so incompetent.” She’s snarling, her face an inch away from yours, and you hate how turned on you are.
You’ve always liked it when she got possessive over you.
“I didn’t want him,” you say levelly. “I only want you.”
She huffs like it’s a joke. “Sure you don’t want the college fuckboy? Or any of the other people in the bar? They’d never hesitate to join you for trivia night.”
And then it hits you. She’s jealous because she’s insecure. She also worries about the age difference.
Your heart swells and you break free of her grasp to grab her cheeks and pull her in for a long and filthy kiss. You moan into her mouth when her tongue swipes against yours and she fits a thigh between your legs.
“I’m all yours, Agatha,” you groan when she tugs your bottom lip between her teeth and her eyes flash.
“You better be,” she warns and entangles her fingers in your hair so she can tilt your head to the side and sink a bite into the juncture of your neck and shoulder. Your hips buck on her thigh and you gasp when she sucks roughly. She trails up your neck, doing the same thing over and over, and you’re quickly reduced to a moaning, desperate mess.
Her other hand trails down to hold onto your hip, just feeling you shakily grind against her, trying to get some relief.
“Should I go back inside and get James to come out and watch this?” She asks against your skin, still marking you up. “So he knows what happens when he touches things that aren’t his?”
You inhale sharply at the thought and wish that she would just drag you back inside and fuck you right there on the table in front of everyone.
“Please,” you beg. She actually giggles and pulls back to admire her handiwork on your neck. She lightly traces over the marks and you shiver under her touch and intense gaze.
Agatha smirks when she meets your eyes again. “That should let everyone know who you belong to. And you, in case you need the reminder.”
You pretend to think for a moment. “Maybe I could use a refresher. Why don’t you show me who owns me?”
Her eyes darken even more as she pulls you back in for a searing kiss that she ends too quickly.
She yanks her thigh from out between yours and grabs your hand, dragging you to the car.
“Oh, I’m going to, baby.”
#agatha harkness x fem!reader#agatha harkness x reader#agatha x reader#agatha x you#agatha harkness x you#kathryn hahn x reader#agatha all along
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You were asking for reqs for rafe x reader, if you are taking them, I have one in mind. In which rafe is extremely possesive of bsf reader, and gets easily jealous. One day she was at a kook party, and a guy approached her and they started to talk and that sh*t went down, rafe got aggressive and almost beat the guy to a pulp. Reader is like a shy cute innocent, bimbo type. And smut after the scene if you write it.
Summary: Innocent!reader X possessive!Rafe, bestfriend!reader X bestfriend!Rafe. Summary is basically the anonymous ask!
Warnings: Rafe is possessive of reader. Established friendship. Rafe almost beats a guy to death. Mentions of drugs (no actual drug use), alcohol consumption. Lots of smut; p in v, unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), fingering, loss of virginity, SLIGHT degradation (some praise too). The classic 'what are we' at the end. The L word.
Word Count: 6.1k
Author Note: Hello Beauties! Thank you for the support and kindness you've all shown me. And thank you for this ask, I really enjoyed writing it. I hope I did your idea justice. Sorry that this is a bit long, it just sort of happened. Also, I hope you all enjoyed the holiday yesterday, well those that celebrate. I'm hoping to finish part four of The Watcher soon so I can get it out, life has just been so exhausting. Anyways, please enjoy and feel free to leave feedback! I love you all, thank you so much!! Stay freaky y'all.
Your best friend, Rafe, had asked you to go to a party with him. Well, more like he had told you to go. Although it’s not like you’d ever miss the opportunity to party with your best friend. So, here you are; walking around the side of Topper’s house, looking for Rafe. You two didn’t come together, he got here before you. He knows you don’t love being around his ‘friends’ and their various illegal substances, even though he says he’s clean, he likes to have time with them before you get there.
You round a corner, now entering the Thorton’s backyard. You look for Rafe as you work your way through the loud and busy crowd. You hear a friend call your name, you turn your head to her, and she waves you over. You approach her and a few others with a smile. You greet them.
The other girls chat amongst themselves as your friend speaks up, shouting over the music. “Hey!” She’s over enthusiastic per regular, probably a bit drunk too.
“Hey!” You shout back.
She begins, “Oh my god! I have to tell you something. Guess who I saw—”. Usually, you’d want to hear all the gossip she’s about to ramble to you, but not right now. “Do you know where Rafe is?” You shout over her, cutting her off.
“What?” She asks, stepping closer to you so she can hear you.
“Do you know—” You’re suddenly interrupted by some guy standing beside you. You turn to face him.
“Hey.” He says, his tone confident. A cocky grin spreads across his face.
“Hi.” You smile politely, “Do I know you?”. You say hurriedly before turning back to your friend. She looks between you and the guy a few times before facing you and giving you a knowing smirk. You know what that look means and before you can say anything, she walks away. Leaving you alone with him. You roll your eyes at her playfully, although you really are annoyed that she didn’t tell you where Rafe is.
Slowly, you turn your head back to the guy, flashing him another fake smile. He grins again before speaking, “No…no you don’t.” He pauses, stepping a bit closer to you so he doesn’t have to shout over the music as loud. “I’m Devin.”
Your fake smile is getting awkward, but you don’t know what to say. You don’t care about talking to him right now. “Nice to meet you, Devin. B-but I need to–”
Devin cuts you off, “Let me get you a drink.”
You laugh shyly, “Oh...I-I’m okay, I actually have to…”
“Let me just get you a drink, it’ll only take a second.” He moves closer to rest his hand on your lower back for a slight moment, to get you to turn toward the drinks.
Rafe was on the back patio sitting on one of the couches when someone had mentioned to him that they saw you. He went to go and find you, which is when he spotted you laughing with some guy, who moments later put his hand on you. Rafe’s already had a few drinks tonight, so his judgment clouded even more than usual, especially when it comes to you.
As you walk towards the drinks, Devin’s hand falls and he follows close behind you.
After a moment, you hear a mix of gasps and ‘ooohh’s’ from everyone. You turn to look behind you where everyone seems to be gathering. You find that Devin isn’t behind you anymore.
Immediately your eyes land on some commotion in the crowd, you squeeze through the ring of people forming around the area. Shit. You run forwards, pausing just before the fight.
Devin is flat on his back, Rafe straddling him. Rafe has Devin’s shirt clenched in one fist, holding his head off the ground as he repeatedly drives his other fist into Devin’s face.
“Rafe!” You shout. Keeping your distance, not wanting to get too close while he’s out of control. You’ve seen how he can get. In the years that you two have been friends, you’ve had to calm him down from countless fights, since nobody else can ever seem to do it. But, when nobody else steps in to try and stop the fight, you step closer, knowing something has to be done. “Rafe, stop! Stop it!” You scream.
Devin’s completely unconscious, his nose is probably broken, but you can’t really tell; his face is a swollen mess of blood and bruises. You can’t stand here and watch anymore, and nobody seems to be listening to your cries for help. Because nobody is stupid enough to get in Rafe’s way while he’s like this. You step behind Rafe, putting your hands on his shoulders. You try to pull him back all the while trying not to get punched.
“Rafe! Look at me! Look at me, Ray!” Rafe turns his head to the side, momentarily stopping his actions, letting Devin’s head rest on the floor. You put a hand up to cup his cheek. Speaking quietly now as you plead to him. “Rafe…c’mon, that’s good, h-he’s had enough…”. Your tears slow, but your breath is still erratic as you look at the unconscious man.
Rafe turns back to the guy, your hand falling from his face. Rafe pulls Devin’s head up, like he was going to punch him again. Instead, he lets go, letting the boy's head hit the floor. Rafe stands up without a word and grabs you by your wrist, tugging you away.
Before you know it, you’re being shoved into your best friend's truck. His random mumbles don’t make much sense to you, talking about ‘he got what he deserved…Should’ve fuckin’ killed him…yeah, should’ve fucking killed him for that. Touchin’ what’s mine…’
When you get to Tannyhill, Rafe wastes no time pulling you into his room. You sit on his bed stiffly, waiting silently as he paces the room.
“Rafe?” You call out softly. “You okay? What happened back there? What was that?”
“He touched you.” Rafe states. His tone is low and rough, sending a chill down your spine. Even after all the years you’ve been his best friend, you still never know how to act when he’s like this.
“Barely. He barely touched me.”
Rafe completely disregards what you say, shaking his head and blowing out a jagged breath as he continues to pace across his room, a bit slower now. “Why was he even talking to you? You were supposed to be with me. I told you to go to the party, not him.”
You take your chance to get a word in as he spews out angry nonsense. “I was looking for you and he started talking, ‘wanted to get me a drink. I was just being nice; I didn’t know who he was. I didn’t even want to talk to him, I was looking for you, Rafe. I don’t even see why that matters–”.
He pauses, looking over at you. His movements are sharp as he strides over to you. “Don’t see why it matters…?” He repeats your words, more for himself than to you. “It matters because you’re mine.” His words are sharp, definitely directed to you that time.
“Rafe…you almost killed him…because of me? I don’t get it Rafe; I don’t nearly kill all the girls you fuck.” You state.
Rafe lets out a breathy chuckle before speaking. “Still don’t get it, huh?” Rafe laughs. “God you’re so innocent. So naive.” He pauses, stepping closer until he’s standing in front of you, looking down at you as you sit on his bed. “I need you, y/n. I can’t…god, I can’t even fuck anyone else anymore without thinking about you. I can’t let anyone else have you, got that? You understand now?” He asks harshly as he runs a rough hand through your hair.
You try to swallow the lump in your throat. You look up and nod weakly, causing Rafe to flash a devilish grin. “Yeah?” He asks quietly, his voice coming out low.
“Yeah…” You mumble back brainlessly, too shocked by your best friend's confession. You had always thought Rafe saw you purely as a friend. Although thinking back, you don’t know how you ever thought that with how he acts, especially lately.
No time is wasted as Rafe quickly leans down, capturing your lips with his. The first kiss is hesitant, and you don’t kiss back. But when he pulls away to look at you, trying to gauge your emotion, you lean in. Your best friend takes that as a sign to continue. His lips quickly find yours again. When he feels you start to kiss back, he escalates things. Kissing you more roughly now, acting as though he’s a starved man and your lips are his meal.
His hand moves from the back of your head to your throat, lightly squeezing. At first you don’t even realize, too distracted by the feeling of his tongue entering your mouth. But when Rafe squeezes your neck even tighter, you move your hands to reach up and wrap around his wrist in an attempt to pull it away. Your mouth still occupied by his, the kiss is too fucking good to break. It feels like everything you didn’t know you needed. He’s giving you what nobody else could, because only he knows exactly what you need and exactly how to give it to you. Your lack of breath reminds you of your situation and you pull away from the kiss momentarily.
Rafe’s grip loosens as he pulls his head back so he can look into your eyes. “Tell me you want this.” He mumbles breathlessly.
You search his eyes as you catch your breath. Nodding, you finally speak up. “I want this.” You say definitively.
Not even half a second later, Rafe’s body crashes down onto you, pushing you down so that you’re laying on his bed. Rafe has one arm beside your head, holding himself up as his other remains on your neck. He hovers over you, one knee pressed between your thighs. Rafe leans down, his lips attaching to your neck, kissing and sucking frantically at your skin. He’s been waiting so, so long for this.
His lips find your ear, softly biting at it before whispering. “Let me take care of you, baby. You want that, hm?”. While waiting for your response, his free hand traces down the side of your body until it reaches the hem of your skirt. He moves his face to the other side of your head, giving some attention to your other ear. “Need your best friend to help you feel good…give you what you need, yeah?” His hand slips under your skirt, slowly gliding up your inner thigh, sending shivers through your whole body.
“Yes–” A moan escapes your lips, interrupting you. Your eyes meet his before you continue. “Please Rafey…need you…”
His lips meet yours at the same time his hand meets your clothed cunt. He kisses you sloppily, exploring every part of your mouth with his tongue. Your hands come up to rest on his chest, your touch sending shocks through him. He rubs you through your panties. He can feel as you grow more needy, the wet spot on your panties getting larger.
He can’t believe this is actually happening. He’s wanted to do this to you for so long; he’s dreamt of this moment happening in almost every way possible, but this…he never could’ve imagined this feeling. “Fuck…you’re so wet f’me already.”
“Ray…please…” You can’t help but rut your panty-clad cunt against his hand, searching for friction. Usually you’re never this bold, but you’re comfortable with him. You always have been, he is your best friend after all. You just pray that he understands what you need.
Except Rafe doesn’t respond in the way you had hoped for. No, instead he pulls his hand out from under your skirt, eliciting a whine from you. He presses a genuine, wet kiss against your parted lips before moving down your body. Rafe slides down, kneeling onto the floor in front of the bed. He grabs you by the back of your knees and tugs you down towards him until your ass is at the edge of the bed. Without breaking eye contact, he swiftly removes your skirt. He spreads your legs, making them bend so your heels are on the edge of the bed. Eagerly, he presses wet, sloppy kisses up your inner thighs, his eyes trained up on you.
The sight of him like this between your thighs, doing exactly what you need…it drives you crazy. You lean your head back, letting out a moan as Rafe mouths at your entrance through the fabric your panties.
It’s not long before he’s peeling back your panties as well, sliding them off of you completely. Your legs threaten to close from insecurity, but your best friend is sure to hold them open.
“Fuck…this pussy’s even prettier than I imagined, baby. Soaked…just for me.” Rafe leans in, his mouth hovering just above your core. He silently asks for permission.
Being your best friend, Rafe knows that you’ve never done this before. No guy had ever wanted to date you while Rafe’s your best friend, they could see that you’re his, even if you couldn’t.
His breath is hot on your bare center, he watches as you squirm and clench around nothing. Eagerly you nod, giving him permission. And within seconds his mouth is on you.
At first, he’s slow; gentle as his eyes continue to meet yours. He licks a warm stripe up your center, briefly pulling back to watch your reaction. Your head falls back, your mouth parted, and eyes closed as you experience this new sensation that your best friend is so generously giving you.
Rafe begins to lick and suck at you. His tongue circles your clit as he looks up, knowing you’d like it. A moan slips past your lips as your hand flies to the back of his head, the other gripping onto the sheets beside you.
“Nnnghh…f-fuck, Ray…” You whine as his tongue fucks you relentlessly. He only mumbles against you in response, sending vibrations through your core. This felt even better than you had ever thought it would. When you heard people talk about sex, you didn’t think it could actually be this good. Though maybe that just has to do with the fact that Rafe’s your best friend, and he knows exactly what you need.
“Yeah?” One of his hands leaves your leg and moves to grope your tits through your clothes. “You like this, huh? You’re just a slut for your best friend, hm? Letting me have you like this…”
“N-need you…” You mutter, grieving the loss of his tongue on you. He stares at you with a devilish glint in his eyes.
“I know, baby. I know.” Rafe’s mouth continues to work on you. His tongue gathers some slick from your entrance and brings it up to your clit, circling it with his tongue a few times before repeating the process.
The feeling in your lower stomach is starting to build. It’s getting hard for you to sit still for him. It’s even harder for you to stay quiet. A plethora of moans escape you as Rafe’s mouth stays busy between your thighs. Your hand holds his head down, your other grips the sheets underneath you.
“Rafe…please. S’too much, I can’t—” You whine.
“Ah ah ah…stop running, baby. I got you. I got you.” Rafe’s grip on your thighs tightens, keeping you in place. “God,” He mutters breathlessly. “You taste…you taste so fuckin’ good. Hiding this from me all that time, hm?” He leans back down and continues his ministrations on you.
Your toes start to curl, the band in your stomach threatening to snap. Suddenly he stops and before you get the chance to look down to see why, one of his fingers is prodding at your entrance. “Gotta stretch this pretty little pussy out, yeah? Don’t wanna hurt you.”
You nod, allowing one of his thick, long digits to slowly slide into you. You almost scream when he starts to move it, his mouth working on you at the same time. Rafe adds another finger, now thrusting two in and out of you.
“Fuck baby, you’re gonna squeeze my cock so good. Jus’ gotta get you used to this, hm? You gonna let your best friend be the first to fuck you?” Rafe asks. You nod in response, agreeing to his words. Rafe’s fingers spread apart inside you, stretching your hole, preparing you for his cock. His tongue pauses again as he looks up at you and correct his previous statement. “The only one to fuck you.” Rafe puts his head back between your thighs, his fingers fucking you mercilessly as his tongue sucks at your bud.
You nod again, followed by a whine. “F-fuck…Ray. I-I think I’m gonna…”
“Yeah? You gonna cum for me, baby? Hm?”
“Mhmm…yes, fuckk–” You respond, your fingers fighting to grasp onto the little hair he has. Your thighs begin to squeeze around him, causing him to pull his head up against the force of your hand on him.
“Just a little more, baby. You can take it. I know you can. You gonna let me help you finish? You wanna cum?”
“Yes! Yes! Please Rafey…please let me cum.” Your begging makes him chuckle briefly before going back down on you. His tongue moves with precision, working on you with a purpose; to make you cum.
Without warning, the band in your stomach snaps. You scream out his name as his tongue circles your sensitive bud and his fingers pump in and out of you slowly. Your best friend continues to work you through your first real orgasm. You’ve never felt anything like this. Why the hell did you wait so long to do this with him?
“God…baby. You’re so fuckin’ perfect. You have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear those pretty sounds.” Rafe carefully slides his fingers out of you, making you clench around nothing at the loss of him. He gets up from his knees, standing over you again. Rafe’s face glistens with your slick. His hand moves up to brush your hair back while he brings his free hand up to your mouth. “Open.” He orders. You oblige and he pushes two digits into your mouth. “Taste that? Taste how fuckin’ good you taste?” He pulls his fingers back, immediately moving down to kiss you. You can taste yourself on his lips. Rafe climbs on top of you, his mouth finding the sweet spot behind your ear. He whispers, “You okay?”
“Mhm…better than okay.” You reassure him. Your legs are still shaking with the aftershock of your orgasm.
“Good.” He mumbles against your skin. “‘Cause I’m not even close to done with you, baby. We’re just getting started.” He doesn’t wait before he’s pulling off your shirt, kissing down your chest. Soon after, he unclasps your bra with one hand, pulling it off of you and tossing it onto the floor somewhere.
His lips are vicious, attaching to any and every bit of your skin. His hands gently cup your breasts, his mouth finding and attaching to one of your nipples. His eyes stay trained up on your face, he likes seeing how you react to his touch. He pulls back, straddling your lap. Your hand shoots out to grab the hem of his shirt, trying to tug it upwards. He smirks and quickly does it himself, tossing it aside. He watches you like prey as your eyes skim over his bare chest.
It’s not like you haven’t seen him shirtless before, you have, many times. But no matter how many times you see him like this, you’ll never get used to it. You’ve never seen him in this way though. It’s different, more intimate. You’ve never shared this kind of intimacy with anybody before. And you’re glad you’re doing it with your best friend, whom you’re comfortable with.
The low light of his bedside lamps reflecting off of his toned skin, damp with sweat. You let out a slow breath as you take in the sight. “Fuck.” You mutter.
Rafe leans down, kissing and nipping at your earlobe. He whispers, “Like what you see?” He laughs.
You nod your head eagerly. “Mhmm…”
“Use your words baby, you’re a big girl, aren’t you?”
“I…y-yes.” You whine as you wriggle underneath him, trying to squeeze your thighs shut in search of some much-needed friction.
Rafe knows what you need. He knows that you’re ready now; ready to give him everything, let him take your innocence, your virtue. He uses one hand to prop himself up as the other works at his belt. Once you realize what he’s doing, you try to help him out, eagerly unbuckling his belt as he kisses you passionately, like he’s never kissed anyone else before you; like you’re the only girl on this fucking planet.
Once his belt is off, you work at his pants. He leans up so he can tug them off, throwing them aside with the rest of the discarded clothes. All that’s left between the two of you now is the thin fabric of his boxers. You can feel his hardened form pressing into your leg as he kisses you, practically devouring you. Without thinking about it, you find your hand tugging at the waistband of his boxers. You beg. “Please”, your lips whisper into his ear as he bites at your neck. “Rafey…”
He leans back again, this time getting off of you and standing at the side of the bed and in front of you. You can’t help but touch yourself as Rafe frees himself from the constraint of his boxers. You watch as his hard cock springs up, hitting his stomach when it’s finally freed. He smirks, leaning down to remove your hand from yourself.
“I got you, baby. I got you. I’ll take care of you.” He mumbles, moving his hand over your core again. His strong fingers circle your clit. Your breath hitches as you watch him touch you, his other hand holding the base of his cock.
“Rafe?” You manage to ask through your cries.
“Hm? What is it?” Rafe says your name softly, encouraging you to continue.
“Will it hurt?” You’ve heard that the first time can be uncomfortable. And judging by Rafe’s size, this was going to be more than just uncomfortable. But that doesn’t mean you’re going to back out of the situation, you need this. You need him.
Your best friend’s expression becomes more serious as he looks at you. His hand comes up from your core to brush a strand of hair behind your ear, his touch lingering. “It might, baby. It might be a little uncomfortable for a moment, but I’ll do my best to make it feel good, yeah? I’ll go slow. And if you don’t like it I want you to tell me. You’re okay, baby. It’s just me, your best friend. I’m gonna take care of you. M’kay?” You nod in response, his eyes darting between your eyes to get a sense of what you’re thinking. Rafe clicks his tongue. “Ah, ah. Use your words, pretty girl.” His hand reaches out for your chin, tilting your face up towards him.
“Please Ray…”
“Please what?”
“Fuck me…” The words sound so vulgar coming from your sweet, innocent mouth. He’s never known you to speak this way, but he’s not against it. He pumps his fist over his cock a few times, his head leaning back as he lets out a groan. “Please Rafe…I-I need you in me…”
Your words snap him out of his amazement. “Atta girl.” He replies. You can feel his tip gently rub against your slippery entrance. Your warm juices on his cock feel better than anything he’s ever experienced. You’re like a drug to him. A drug that he can’t get enough of.
He pulls back before you can get used to the feeling of him. He leans over you, reaching into his dresser drawer. When he moves back over you, you see the shiny square wrapper in his hand.
You place your hands over his as he tries to open the condom. “No…”
His head snaps up at you. “No…? No what?” He asks, confused. “You don’t want to do this?”
“No…Rafe, I-I want this. I just…I want to feel you. No…no condom.” You explain.
“Fuck, y/n. Are you sure?” Rafe’s disbelief and shock is very apparent in his tone.
“Yes, I’m sure. I’m on the pill.” You confirm.
“God, how much more perfect can you fuckin’ get?” He chuckles, making you huff out a quick laugh.
Soon his lips are back on yours as he uses his hand to guide his glistening, pink tip back to your puffy cunt. Slowly, he pushes into you, just so that the very tip of his cock is inside of you. He looks up to your face, pending your reaction.
“F-fuck…Rafe.” Your hands move to his hips, pushing him further inside. Rafe gives in, pushing another inch into you. “Mnghh, fuck…Rafe.” Rafe settles there for a moment before giving you another inch or two. Each time he moves, he looks to make sure you’re still enjoying it, giving you a minute to adjust each time. When he finally bottoms out, you feel so…full. The pain is there, but it doesn’t last long, fading into a light discomfort as your soft walls mold to his shape. You involuntarily squeeze around him.
“Shiiiitt, baby…Squeezin’ me so tight.” He pauses to kiss you, his lips soon finding that soft spot behind your ear that makes you shiver. “M’gonna move now, alright?”
“Mhm…please…” You whine. You hook your arms under his, bringing your palms up to grip onto his back. Rafe continues to kiss all over your neck and chest as he slowly pulls out of you, until only the tip is left inside. Without warning, he pushes into you a bit quicker this time, with a bit more force than before. But you’re not complaining. You cry his name out, your nails digging into his shoulders. He begins to move at a slow, steady pace as he whispers sweet nothings into your ear. “F-fuck…” You yelp, gripping onto him even harder.
“Fuck, baby…your nails, they hurt.” He mumbles amusedly into your ear as he nips at it. Immediately your grip loosens. You feel terrible but can’t manage to muster up an apology since you can’t think clearly with how his cock is repeatedly kissing your cervix with each thrust.
“Faster.” You beg, pressing your forehead into his arm. He listens cautiously, carefully picking up the face. He lifts one of your legs over his shoulder. The new position allows him to hit an even deeper spot inside of you. When his digits start to circle your clit you almost let out a scream, making him chuckle.
“Such a fuckin’ whore for me, hm?” He laughs as he fucks you senseless.
“Fuck…Rafey, no, I…I can’t. Can’t take it.” You moan, throwing your head back as your eyes squeeze shut.
“You can and you will.” He speaks emotionlessly, overtaken by pleasure. Rafe’s hand moves from you clit up to your throat again, he applies a bit of pressure. Your hands leave his back and wrap around his wrist. Your eyes stay shut as your face contorts into that of pure bliss. His thumb slides into your mouth and you suck and bite at it, trying to distract yourself from the overwhelming feeling of him fucking you. You don’t see how you can ever stop; this feeling is…unlike anything else you’ve felt before. “You got this baby. M’almost there. You can let go, baby. Just let go f’me.”
Sooner than later you feel the newly familiar feeling of pressure building in your lower stomach. When it snaps, your body tenses up, a wave of moans escape your mouth as the band snaps and pleasure washes over you. Rafe continues to fuck you slowly, his movements becoming more sporadic than strategic.
“Fuck, where do you want it?”
“My pussy, please Rafey…fill me up?” You ask, eyes wide with tears as you look up at him. “Please?”
“Shit, you sure?” Rafe groans, barely able to hold on any longer.
“Y-yes...I’m sure.” Only seconds later you can feel his warm seed spurting out inside of you. Your gummy walls soaking him in as they squeeze around him, milking him for all that he’s got.
“Fuckk y/n. Do that again.” As he thrusts into you without any specific rhythm, you obey his words, squeezing tightly around his length again. Rafe lets out a guttural moan, tossing his head back for a moment before looking at you again, watching how well you take him, as if you were made for him. The way he fills you up you is like pieces of a puzzle, just meant for one another. “Shiiitt…you’re so fucking tight. Squeezin’ ‘round your best friends cock so good.”
After you’re both worked through your orgasms, he pulls out of you. You groan at the loss of him, feeling a big opening left where he had been. Rafe leans down to press a deep, meaningful kiss to your lips. He pulls back, wiping your hair and sweat from your face with a proud smile.
“God, baby. You did so good, so fucking good. That’s a good girl. My girl, yeah?” He leans down again, pressing a kiss to your neck. Rafe whispers in your ear. “m’so proud.” Before pulling away completely, he presses a kiss to each of your cheeks, your nose, and one final kiss to your forehead.
You turn on your side to face him as he lay on the bed beside you. “Rafe…” Your voice shows your exhaustion, but also your hesitancy.
He turns on his side to face you as well, propping his head up against his hand. “Hm?” He says with a smile. He can’t help it, it’s impossible for him to see you and not smile after what you just did.
You flop back down onto your back, staring up at the ceiling. It’s too hard to say this while looking at his beautiful smile. “That was…”
“Incredible?” He interrupts, his fingers lightly tracing up and down your arm.
“What was that?” You blurt out, scared that if you don’t say it now then you never will.
Rafe’s smile fades quickly, he props himself up on his elbows, staring down at you with furrowed brows. “Woah woah, woah. Hey. What? What d’you mean?”
You give a light shrug, his fingers no longer moving over your skin. You avoid looking at his pretty eyes. “I mean like…what happens now?”
He sighs, laying back down next to you, looking up at the ceiling. “Well, you’re my girl now, yeah? I thought that was obvious.”
“Your girl? The Rafe Cameron I know doesn’t do girlfriends.” You say lightly.
“That’s because I never wanted one. I never…needed one, I’ve got you.”
“So…we’re friends?” You ask, attempting and failing at trying to hide your emotions.
“We are, aren’t we?” Rafe responds, not knowing what his words imply or how they’ll make you feel.
“Yeah…yea we’re friends.” You say dryly.
He turns his head to face you. “Hey. Y/N. What’s wrong? Hey…hey, talk to me.”
“Nothing, Rafe. I’m fine.”
“Jesus, no you’re not. C‘mon baby, what is it?”
“Nothing!” You snap. You’re angry about your own reaction, feeling stupid once the words leave your mouth. Grabbing the sheets, you cover yourself up.
“Did I do something? What’d I do?” Asks Rafe, making you feel worse about yourself. It’s not his fault you feel like this. “Is it what we did? Look, I’m sorry if—“
You cut him off, not being able to listen to him blame himself. “I just…I don’t think friends do what we just did.”
“Jesus, y/n. Look…” He trails off, cursing himself. “Do you not wanna be my girl or something? ‘Cause I can—“
“No, Rafe. I just…I don’t get what you mean. Your girl?”
“Yeah.” He says, confused.
“Like…your girlfriend? Dating? Us?”
“Fuck. Yes, baby. My girlfriend.” Rafe says the word as though it’s a pain to say it. “Will you be my girlfriend? Please?” You could tease him about the way he’s practically begging you.
“Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?” You joke, not being able to resist. Rafe laughs, glad to hear your usual self.
“Well, I’m kinda hoping that I’m your…boyfriend, now.”
“Hmm…let me think…” You say, tapping your chin as if this is something you need to contemplate. You can see his demeanor sadden from the corner of your eye, causing you to look over at him. “What’s in it for me?” You add, a smirk threatening to appear on your face. You can barely hold back your laughter at this point, but he still looks so sad, like a puppy who can’t have a treat. “Jesus Rafe, I thought you’d never ask.” You don’t even give him enough time to respond before you’re on top of him, his lips immediately seeking yours.
“Yeah? You mean it?” He asks between kisses, almost nervously.
“Of course I do, Rafe. ‘Promise.”
You always know just what to say to him to calm down his mind, he loves that about you. “Fuck, you have no idea how long I’ve been waiting for this. God, I fuckin’ love you.” Your eyes widen at his confession, you look down at him. He’s almost just as shocked as you are. He didn’t even know he felt that way. The words just slipped out, but they felt so right. “Fuck, no, I meant—“ Rafe starts, but you cut him off. You kiss him again, passionately. This kiss shows him exactly how you feel, somehow being more intimate than having sex with him was.
“I love you, Rafe. I promise.” You know how he can feel like everybody is against him, so you try to reassure him as much as you can. You’re the only one who’s ever made him feel cared for; he just never wanted to fuck things up with you. “Please just…can you promise me that you’ll stop beating up random strangers who talk to me? ‘Cause I don’t care about them, Rafe. I care about you.”
This is all so new, talking to each other in this way. But it’s how you’ve both always felt. “But y/n, he-“ Rafe pauses, reconsidering his words for you. He sighs and then mumbles, “Yeah…I’ll try.” He looks back at you, you with a stern look in your eyes. “I will. I promise.”
You smile, leaning down for a kiss. Quickly, things start to escalate again. Rafe flips you both over so he’s on top. He leans down to kiss your neck, sucking and nipping at it as he works his way down, kissing every inch of you.
“Mnmh…fuck…” You moan.
Rafe smiles against your skin. “Yeah, baby? That feels good huh?” You only nod eagerly as a response. Rafe takes hold of his already hard cock, using his fist to pump over himself a few times, letting out a low growl. He rubs his dewy, pink tip over your sticky hole.
You let out a moan, still being sensitive from your previous orgasms. “F-fuck…Rafe, m’too sensitive, s’too much.” You whine.
“Shh…shhhh baby, it’s okay. I’m not gonna do nothin’, jus’ wanna show you how proud of my girl I am.” His mouth works it’s way down, landing back between your thighs. Your boyfriend softly bites at your inner thighs, his eyes staying trained on you as your face contorts in pleasure. Eventually he finds your soaking core, lapping up the mix of your juices. You feel his fingers gather some of your arousal, mixed with his cum. Before you know it, those fingers are deep inside your throat. “Taste that, baby? Hm? Taste how fucking good we are?”
You nod, whining when his mouth finds your core again. His tongue flicks at your most sensitive bud, making you jump. Although Rafe only holds onto harder the more you try to run. “Baby, it’s okay. Let me take care of you; clean you up.”
It doesn’t take long until you’re yet again, a shaking, crying mess underneath him. When his mouth works it’s way back to yours, you can taste both of you on his tongue. “Fuckin’ love this pussy. I fucking love you.”
You smile a weak, tired smile at him. He rolls off of you, flipping you both on your side so he can spoon you. He kisses your shoulder, his fingers lightly tracing mindless shapes into your skin. “I love you too.” You respond as you drift off to sleep in your boyfriend's arms.
Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed. Please feel free to leave more asks, I will most likely get to them at some point. Thank you!
#rafesbabyg1rl#rafe cameron#drew starkey#obx season 4#outer banks#outer banks netflix#rafe cameron x reader#rafe obx#outer banks season 4#rafe x reader#obx4part2#anon ask#thanks anon!#asks#rafe x you#rafe smut#rafe fanfiction#outerbanks rafe#rafe outer banks#rafe imagine#rafe cameron smut#obx x reader#obx rafe cameron#rafe cameron outer banks#rafe fic#rafe cameron fanfiction#outer banks rafe#outer banks fanfiction#obx#rafe cameron x kook!reader
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the shadow of alexia
At 4 years old my entire life changed. One day my dad was at home and the next he wasn’t. Things changed after that. Everyone was sad, lots of people visited too. Sometimes I got new toys when they came over.
Alba was a scary teenager but Alexia. Alexia was my best friend and I was hers. She would take me to kindergarten and pick me up, she never missed a soccer game or ballet recital, she was always there. So was her special friend Jenni. Jenni was great, when I was little she used to let me colour in her tattoos, Everytime she got a new one, she’s get me new pens to colour on her.
As time went on, Alba and Alexia started moving out. Alexia moved in with Jenni and started getting busy with football, Alba still lived with Mami but was busy with her friends and modelling. Mami did the best she could. She was getting older and more tired, she didn’t miss a game or my last ballet recital, she didn’t miss the disappointment in my eyes when Alexia or Alba didn’t turn up. They were busy, I understand.
It went from seeing them a couple times a week, to once a week, to once a month. I learnt pretty quickly the only way to get Alexia’s attention was to either play football or to fuck up. Lucky for me I was good at both. School was boring, it was too easy, I understood it all faster than anyone else. The first time I skipped school, I was 14. No one noticed and no one cared. From there on out it became a routine. At least once a week I’d skip school and hang out with the others.
I personally never did anything too rowdy, just tagged along to enjoy the vibes. The first time I got caught skipping school was by Virginia. She promised me she wouldn’t tell Alexia or Mami and she kept that promise. The next time was by Alba, she lost her shit. Yelling at me about how irresponsible I was being and how much trouble I would get in. The second last time I got caught was by Jenni, I hadn’t seen her in a while, I was mad at her because of that so when she tried to give me a lecture I yelled at her.
“Y/n, you can’t be doing this shit. If Alexia found out she would lose it at you! What would happen if the police got you? What would you do then?”
“Why do you care Jenni? Huh? You left, you haven’t been around. You fucked off to Paris and didn’t even say goodbye. Tell Alexia, I don’t care, at least then she would talk to me.”
“Y/n, did Ale not talk to you about this?” Her voice was incredibly soft. That was something I missed about her, the way she spoke, the softness that was hidden from most people.
“She doesn’t talk to me at all. She doesn’t give a fuck about me.”
“Bebeita, we broke up. Thats why I left. we ended things and to be able to heal I had to leave. I am so sorry, she promised she would talk to you about it. I wanted to say goodbye to you myself but Alexia said it would be a bad idea.”
From there things spiralled. I didn’t want to talk to Alexia, I didn’t want to see her. I stopped going to her games with Mami, I would sneak out when I knew she was coming over. No longer did I look up to her, I hated her. I wanted nothing to do with her.
The day I quit football, I felt free. No longer having to play to get my oldest sisters attention, I didn’t care for that anymore. I had more time to hang out with my friends, to be a normal fucking teenager.
It took a week, it was quicker then I thought to be honest, but once Alexia found out, all hell broke loose.
“Where the hell is she!” Alexia stormed through the house. Surprising Eli.
“Who Alexia?”
“The Idiota. Your mija?” Alexia huffed. Eli was surprised by the way Alexia was acting.
“In her room with her friend.” Before Eli could say anything else, Alexia was off. Swinging open the door and disturbing the peace between you and your girlfriend.
“You, get out.”
“No Alexia. You don’t get to tell her to get out.” I got defensive fast. There’s no way she gets to come here and tell her she needs to leave.
“GET OUT NOW!” Alexia’s ‘captain’ voice was something that always got people moving.
“You don’t get to come here and act like you run the place. News flash alexia, you don’t fucking live here!”
“¡Dios mío! What is happening! Why did Isabella leave crying?” Mami looked pissed. More so at alexia than me.
“Alexia kicked her out. For no reason other than the fact that no one else is allowed to be happy but her.”
“Tell her what you did!” When I was younger, the look she was giving me would’ve scared me, but now it did nothing.
“I didn’t do anything alexia. Whatever your minions are telling you isn’t true. But hey, you wouldn’t listen to me anyway.” I tried to push past her, but she grabbed my wrist stopping me from moving.
“Mami she quit football. She fucking quit. After everything I’ve done for her she throws it back in my face!” Rolling her eyes and scoffing at me.
“Let her go now. I am aware she quit Alexia. She was only doing it for you.” Mami was mad, very mad. Alexia had come and disturbed the peace, making Isabella cry and screaming the house down.
“Grab me like that again I’ll drop you on your ass. I don’t give a fuck that you are la Reina.” The words came out like venom.
Everything is always about Alexia. I joined football to get close to her, I didn’t mean to get as far as I did, I honestly didn’t think I’d get past the academy. Being called up into the Barca B squad was cool. I enjoy the fitness side of it but genuinely couldn’t care less about actually playing.
The same day I quit, was the same day I got called up for the senior team. It sent me into a bit of a spiral. Mapi found me in the corner of the physios room with my sketchbook, crying.
“Oh nena! What’s wrong? Do you want me to get Ale?”
“No! Not ale! Don’t tell her please!”
“Okay no Ale but can you tell me what’s got you so worked up?”
“I got asked to join the senior team and I don’t want to. I only started playing so Alexia would be nice to me and talk to me. I don’t even like this stupid game! I just want to draw but that’ll never be good enough for her.”
After that, Mapi and I would get coffee in the mornings, I would show her my new drawings and tell her my ideas. She paid me to draw a photo of her and Ingrid. I knew she could draw herself but it was nice to have her in my corner. Mapi was talking more about to me Alexia, saying how good my drawings were and how much happier I seemed not having to play, she seemed to miss the confusion written all over Alexia’s face.
•———————————————————————•
Mami had a trip coming up, I knew about this, but what I didn’t know what she was going to make me stay with alexia. Isabella and I came home after the movies to find Mami, Alexia, Alba and some other chick sitting at the table. I mumbled a quick hello before trying to drag Isabella upstairs.
“Don’t be so rude. Actually say hello.” Alexia spoke angrily.
Scoffing I turned around “bite me Alexia.”
“¡Dios mío! Isabella Mi vida, it’s time for you to go home. You can wait upstairs for your Mami.”
“Mami no. That’s not fair. She doesn’t get to come in here and start bossing everyone around!”
“It’s okay amor, I should go home anyway. We have that biology exam anyway.”
“Now that your little friend is gone, sit down.”
“No.”
“SIT DOWN.”
“Ale, Cálmate.” The mysterious brunette says as she places her arm on alexia’s.
Fuck all this shit honestly. Turning as fast as I could I ran upstairs, knowing Alexia would follow quickly. I was right. I was barely able to push my dresser against the door before she tried to open it. I was not going to sit at that table and play happy families.
After an hour of listening to Alexia curse, she finally gave up. It was peaceful until Alba climbed through my bedroom window.
“Still got it.”
“Alba what the hell!”
“Hermana, I don’t know what happened between you and Ale, but if it’s the same thing that happened between me and you then you need to talk to her. She’s worried about you and scared. She doesn’t want to lose you.”
“She only cares now that she thinks her precious imagine is going to get hurt.”
“If you talk to her now, while Olga is here, it’ll be easier. She calms Alexia down and makes her think more rationally.”
“Who the fuck is Olga?” Was that the mysterious brunette in the dining room?
“What do you mean? She’s alexia’s girlfriend? You’ve met her before?”
“No I haven’t. I didn’t know she had a girlfriend.”
“Yes you met her a dinner a few months ago? She comes to Ales games and on Fridays when we have dinner!”
“I wasn’t invited to that dinner, I don’t go to Alexia’s games and I certainly don’t go to Friday dinners!” The angry tears started. Alexia was my hero, my bestfriend, the person I wanted to be and now I’ve been pushed aside. I know nothing about her and she equally knows nothing about me.
Alba pulled me in tight, letting me cry on her. It was weird doing it with her, she used to be the reason I cried and not the one to comfort me. But here we are, things change I guess.
“Mami really needs to talk with you so we need to go downstairs.” Begrudgingly I let alba pull me down the stairs. It was obvious to everyone that I had been crying, mami’s face softening when she saw me, Alexia’s face frowning in confusion.
“You wanted to talk so please do it quickly. I want to go to bed.” I tried to speak as respectfully as I could to Mami, it wasn’t her fault.
“Mija, I’ll be away for a month, you know this si?” I nodded my head before she continued, “you’re too young to stay here for a month alone so you’re going to stay with Alexia and Olga. You can still see your friends and will go to school, but they will look after you.”
“Mami no! I can look after myself!”
“You’re 16 chica. You’re not an adult like you think you are.” Alexia scoffed from the other side of the table.
“So what? You’re shipping me off to stay with Alexia, who won’t even been there half the time and a stranger? That’s safer? Some person that I’ve never met and sure as shit don’t trust!”
“Stop being such a Perra! You have met Olga, plenty of times! She comes to all the games she can, and to dinners all the time.”
“Ale stop” Alba knew what was coming and tried to stop it but it was too late.
“Dios mío, your head is so far up your own arse isn’t it? I haven’t been to a single game in over 8 months, I don’t get invited to you stupid little Friday night dinners and I have never met your girlfriend! Up until an hour ago I didn’t even know you had a fucking girlfriend Alexia. Everything is always about you. You and your stupid football or your stupid knee. I bet you right now you couldn’t tell me anything about what I’ve done in the last year, can you?”
“I know you quit football because you’re being a brat.”
Her answer honestly made me chuckle “Okay Alexia, anything else?”
Silence. She couldn’t tell you a single thing.
“Yeah that’s what I thought. You know nothing about me and that’s how it’s going to stay. I dont trust you, I don’t like you and I sure as shit don’t love you. You’re not my Hermana.” With hot tears falling down my face, I stormed back upstairs. I text Isabella asking if I could stay over and once she replied with a yes, I was gone. Out the window like Alba had come in an hour earlier. I texted Mami to let her know, I wasn’t that horrible to make her worry.
“Mami, you can’t let her talk to people like that! She’s incredibly disrespectful!”
Alba rolled her eyes and scoffed. “Are you serious? That girl used to hang off you. She looked up to you. It was always you alexia and now she wants nothing to do with you. You don’t invite her places, you don’t care about her. I noticed ages ago she was pulling away and I fixed it. Did you know she has a girlfriend? Or that she’s taking senior classes because she’s the smartest there? Or the fact that people are paying her to make them art or buying the pieces she already has. She quit football because she hates it. She hates it because of you. You ruined it for her. Mami, I will stay here with her while you’re gone. It’ll be better that way. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to drop her off at Isabella’s.”
“No! It’s a school night! She cannot be going out!” It seems everything that was just said to Alexia, went in one ear and out the other.
“Alexia stop it now. She is allowed to stay at her girlfriend’s house, she has an exam at 1pm. Maybe you need to listen to what people are saying to you. I am going to bed, I suggest you all do the same, at your own houses.”
“Why does no one listen to me!” Alexia was annoyed, overwhelmed and tired. It had drained a lot of her energy being here tonight.
“Ale, I’m going to say this one time, you need to listen to what everyone has told you tonight, really listen, because you aren’t. You need to fix things with her but you need to sort your shit out first.” Olga had stayed silent most of the night, listening to everything that was said knowing her girlfriend wouldn’t. You were right, you had never met each other. What Olga didn’t realise was that it was Alexia’s fault, not yours. She put it down to being a moody teenager who was too cool to hang out with her sisters, oh how wrong she was.
•———————————————————————•
Two days before Mami was meant to go away, Alba rang saying she couldn’t stay over. She had gotten a modelling gig in Madrid and needed to go, that left Alexia and Olga. It would be the longest month of my life. Mami promised nothing would change just because I was staying here, she was wrong. Alexia was a bitch.
The first few days were fine, alexia would drop me off at school and I’d make my way home after, I generally spend it was Isabella because Alexia wouldn’t let her come over. We go into the city centre, get coffee and do our homework then catch the bus home. We did this even when Mami was here so it wasn’t anything new but when Alexia found out she hit the roof.
“You cannot be going into the city by yourself! Are you thick in the head?”
“Jesus Christ alexia! I’m not alone. Isabella is with me. Mami lets me do it so I’m going to keep doing it.”
“Is Isabella the reason you’re skipping school too?”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.” I scoffed, storming off the guest bedroom and slamming the door so hard it made Olga jump.
By the third day of me being there, Alexia had turned up to pick me up herself. I tried to completely ignore her but Isabella had other ideas.
“Your sister is death staring me right now.”
“No amor, not you but me. Oh fuck here we go, she’s coming over here.”
“Get in the car y/n.”
“No. I told you yesterday that I’m allowed to do this. You’re not the boss of me.”
“Bebeita, it’s fine. I’ve got chores to do for papa anyway. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She kissed my cheek and then walked away, leaving me no choice but to get in Alexia’s car.
The car ride was hell. Alexia was pissed, her hands constantly gripping the steering wheel so hard her knuckle turned white. Neither of us spoke. To be honest, I didn’t know where we were going until we turned up at the training ground.
“Why are we here?”
“We have training. Get out.”
“No alexia. I quit. What part of that don’t you understand.”
“Get out now, or I will drag you out.”
Knowing she would literally drag me out, I had to wait it out. She’d turn her back eventually and I could leg it. I’m faster than her and more willing to jump fences.
The time came sooner than I thought, after entering the change rooms, she threw a set of clothes into my chest and walked off to the bathrooms. This was my chance and I wasn’t going to waste it.
Throwing the clothes into her cubby, I legged it out the door. Running past Mapi, Ingrid and Ona who all had confused looked on their faces. As soon as I got out, I kept running, knowing i had to get a head start. I wasn’t really sure where I was going, I knew I couldn’t go back to Alexia’s, Olga would be there. I couldn’t go home because that’s the first place she’d go, I couldn’t go to Albas because she drag me back by my ear. There was only one place to go.
Can Cuyás Golf Culb was the best place to hide. Sure someone might see me, but it’s easy enough to pretend to be lost.
The first thing Alexia noticed when she came out was the lack of you. Then the clothes she had given you, thrown back into her cubby.
“Have you seen y/n?” She asked as she turned to the girls in the locker room.
“She ran past us like 5 minutes ago?” Ona spoke up.
“Did she say anything?”
“No she was in a bit of a hurry Ale.” Mapi rolled her eyes at her best friend.
“Fuck sake.” Alexia exited the locker room, walking through the facility to try and find you. Slight panic kicked in when she wasn’t able too. Deciding to call Alba first, knowing you’d been closer to her the past few months.
“Hola Ale, to what do I owe this pleasure?” The sarcasm dripping from her voice.
“Have you seen y/n?”
“No why? What happened?” Panic arising in Alba.
“I picked her up from school and bought her to training. Gave her clothes to change into and I went to the toilet and came back and she was gone. She fucking ran off.”
“Why the hell would you try and make her train Alexia! She quit. She doesn’t want to play anymore!” Alba quickly became anger with the oldest Putellas.
“She is too good to throw it all away! She’s being a stupid child about all of this!” Quickly becoming defensive, not enjoying the way Alba is talking to her.
“You’re unbelievable. I haven’t seen her, I will try and find her. Don’t you worry, put your football above her like you always do.”
“Alba-“ she hung up before alexia could get another word in. There was one person left that Alexia had to call.
“Hola amor, why aren’t you training?” Olga’s sweet voice sounded through the phone.
“I’ve lost y/n. Can you please let me know if she comes home and if she does then don’t let her out of your sight.”
“What do you mean you’ve lost her Ale?”
“I bought her to training and she ran away while I was in the bathroom.” Pinching the bridge of her nose, Alexia already knew by the silence on the other end that Olga was trying to not yell at her.
“Alexia-“
“No I know okay. I already got an ear full from Alba. I have to go but I’ll call you later okay. I love you.” Slowly it started to creep in the fact that she had fucked up and caused you to run away. Training dragged on for Alexia, hoping that you had been found or made contact with Alba or even Olga.
Meanwhile, after hiding at the golf course for an hour, i decided to head to Isabella’s house. Knocking on the door, Isabella answered, still buttoning up her shirt. Eyes wide when she realised I was at her door.
“Wh-what are you doing here?” She closed the door slightly, so I could no longer see into the loungeroom.
“I ran away from Alexia. I was hoping we could hang out like normal?”
“Now’s not really a good time. I have someone here.” Isabella spoke quietly, not wanting to allude to the fact that the person inside wasn’t just a friend.
“Baby come back, we weren’t finished.” A guys voice yelled out.
“It’s not what you think y/n!”
“I think that guy wants your attention. I’m guessing that’s the reason you’re half dressed. Enjoy your time with him, we are done.” Tears welling in my eyes.
“I’m sorry y/n!”
“Go fuck your self Isabella.” sadness turned into anger real quick.
Isabella was my first girlfriend, my first kiss, the first person I had sex with and she goes and fucks a guy? While we are together? This is literally the last thing I wanted to deal with.
Unsure on what to do, or who to call I found my way to the beach. My throat and eyes hurt from crying so much. The pain in my chest was getting worse. Pulling out my phone, ignoring all the messages and calls, I rang the one person who would calm me.
“Hey Calabaza? What’s up?” Jenni’s voice rang through my ears. Unable to form a coherent sentence, only sobs coming out of my mouth.
“Hold on Bebé” I could hear her moving around, the voices of her teammates getting quieter, “talk to me. What happened?”
“I ran away. I ran away from Alexia and I went to Isabella’s house and she-she was cheating on me. With a guy. A fucking dude. She broke my heart Jenni. It hurts so much.”
“Oh babé. Where is Ale now? Where are you?”
“I don’t know. She’s probably at training. I’m at the beach where Papa used to take us. She’s going to be so mad at me.”
“Can you tell me why you ran away from her?” The way Jenni spoke so sweetly was something I missed dearly.
“She got me from school and took me to the training grounds. She was trying to make me train but when she went to the bathroom I ran away. I don’t want to train, I don’t want to play. I hate the game and I hate her. She doesn’t listen or care about me!” I could feel myself getting upset again.
“Okay okay, just breathe. You’re okay. I’m not going to tell her where you are but I need to tell someone. Albs has messaged me and so has Olga. You can pick who I tell.”
Pondering the options, Alba would tell Alexia but she’d also be just as angry and upset. Olga would tell Alexia but she’d be calmer and softer, that was what I needed at this moment.
“Olga. But tell her not to bring Alexia.”
“Okay bebé.” After a few moments she spoke up again, “she’s on the way. She promised no Alexia. Do you want to stay on the line with me until she comes?”
“Yes please. Can you tell me about Mexico?” Sniffling and wiping my face, I got up, walking towards the road to wait for Olga. After 25 minutes, Olga pulled up. A sad smile and worry on her face, she put an arm around me.
“Is Olga there now?” Jenni asked.
“Yeah she is. Uh thanks Jenni. Sorry for disturbing you.” Embarrassed about haven taken her time.
“No bebé, you don’t need to thank me or apologise. We are hermanas no matter what okay. You call me tomorrow when you’re feeling better. I love you.” with that she hung up. Reality slowing sinking it.
“Let’s get you home yeah? Are you hungry?” Olga smiled sadly at me.
“No thanks. Just tired.” I mumbled out.
The drive back to Alexia’s was quiet. When we pulled up, Alexia’s car wasn’t there, meaning she wasn’t home. That was good. Very good.
“She’s at Albas house. I told her you had messaged me but that I didn’t know where you were yet. It’s a small lie, but I’m sure it’s worth it.”
“Alexia hates lying.” I said lowly. Thinking back to all those times as a small girl that she yelled at me for lying.
“I know Pequeño. Do you want to tell me what happened today?”
“Everyday Isabella and I go into the city and have coffee and do our homework, but today Alexia came to school and got me. She drove us to the training grounds and said I had to train. But I-i quit. I don’t want to play anymore, I don’t enjoy it and only did it for Alexia but it was never enough. Nothing I do is ever enough for her.” Olga grabbed my hand, giving it a squeeze for me to continue.
“I went to Isabella’s house and she had someone there. A guy, a guy that she was fucking. She was cheating on me for god knows how long. I thought everything was good with us. She was my first girlfriend and my first kiss. I lost my fucking virginity to her and she goes and fucks someone else? It just hurts. So much. Everything is hurting so much.”
“Oh pequeño. Come here.” Olga held me tight, my tears slowly soaking her shirt.
“Why doesn’t she love me like she loves Alba? I don’t understand.”
“Alexia?”
“Mhm. Nothing I do is good enough. I just want her to care about me more. Why can’t she?” It broke Olga’s heart hearing me say that. She didn’t know what was happening but she knew Alexia needed to fix it and fast.
After slowly showering, I thanked Olga and excused myself to bed. I didn’t think I had any tears left to cry but after crying for a while, I managed to pass out.
•———————————————————————•
After you went to your room, Olga texted Alexia, telling her she was here and safe. Alba and Alexia both rushed back to her home. Angry and worried at you, ready to both give you an ear full.
“Where is she Olga?” Alexia came in loudly.
“Keep your voice down. Both of you.” Olga was very firm.
“No she’s in trouble. She doesn’t get off lightly, we have been so worried about her.” Alexia sooke back angrily, usually she’d listen to her girlfriend but this had sent her into a rage.
“Really Ale? You’ve been worried? So worried you couldn’t train right? That you spent all night calling her friends or going to her favourite spots to try and find her?” Olga had had enough.
“Amor that’s not fair.”
“No you know what’s not fair? The fact that neither of you have been listening to her. She doesn’t want to play, she did it for you Ale. She wanted to make you proud of her. She hated playing but you wouldn’t know that. She loves to draw, and she’s really really good at it. She showed me all her work.”
Olga walked to the couch, extremely disappointed with the two women standing in front of her.
“Her girlfriend cheated on her. She found out this afternoon. She rang Jenni and Jenni messaged me. That’s how I found her. She was at the beach, heartbroken. Then when we got home, she asked why you didn’t love her Ale. She thinks you don’t care about her. That girl may have broke her heart tonight, but you broke her heart first Alexia. You’ll need to live with the fact that you were her first heartbreak.” Olga was exhausted. Neither Alexia Or Alba said anything. Both sitting in opposite ends of the lounge room, tears silently falling.
Olga excused herself to bed, leaving the older two in the lounge room to mull on their thoughts. She promised herself after your heartbreaking confession that she would have your back through this. Whatever tomorrow held, you would face it together.
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nerd in love
– after a misunderstanding, jisung finally tells yn how he feels at his birthday party .ᐟ.ᐟ
pairing | han jisung x fem reader
genre | mutual pining , fluff , uni au – 18+ is strongly advised!
cw | she/her pronouns used ; mostly in jisung pov ; food and alcohol mentioned ; a lil suggestive at the end
words | 10.1k ~ ( 10,133 )
notes | well, here it is! i started this before my break (which is why its so late) but finished it during my break n i just wanted to post it bc im proud of this n i adore this version of jisung n the friendship dynamics !! :( don’t forget to leave feedback, reblog and tell me what you think here. i hope you all enjoy! ‹3
m.list — wips list — you can also read it on my ao3
dont repost. dont translate. minors, ageless & default blogs; dni! feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!
your pen taps against the white, lined sheet of paper that has a few scribbles and doodles on. your cheek resting on your hand as you sigh a little in boredom.
the professor has been groaning on and on about the same thing. you want to listen and take in the information as you know it's important, but your mind wanders and you start to daydream; making imaginary scenarios.
you'd imagine an alien suddenly abducting you because it heard your silent cries of boredom. you and the alien would become the best of friends, the alien showing you around it's space shuttle and inviting you to have some tea and cake before making friendship bracelets – because that's what humans do, right?
other times, you'd imagine a strong, buff greek god suddenly turning up in class. he'd walk to you and take your hand, claiming that you're his long lost bride, before carrying you bridal style and off into the sunset where you two would get married and have babies.
so caught up in your fake scenarios, you don't see that another student is now looking at you.
the student is sitting in front of you–his usual designated spot. black hair that's long and permed and covers his eyes. glasses sitting on the bridge of his nose. dressed in a button up shirt and black jeans, paired with a few accessories and black doc marten boots.
“excuse me.” he whispers, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “you're making too much noise.” he frowns.
you snap out of your daydream and sit up straight, wiping the imaginary drool from your chin with the back of your hand.
“o-oh.. sorry jisung.” you laugh awkwardly. he tuts and rolls his eyes before facing the front. you scoff a little and sit back in your seat.
you don't have very many friends in university, a small handful but it's enough and you don't have very many enemies either, but since jisung started the same class as you, he's been cold towards you.
he's not like this with other people, just you–it's like he can't stand you.
but for some reason, his cold, mean demeanour just makes you want him and find him even more attractive.
it's not a kink of yours, to be spoken down to and degraded. in fact, you love having the attention on you and being treated kindly and gently so it's unknown to you why you find him so attractive.
“alright class! that's all for today. you're all dismissed.” the teacher says. you silently cheer, packing up your things in your backpack.
jisung rises to his feet and swings his bag onto his shoulder, letting it rest there before pulling out his phone. you both catch eye contact with each other.
“see you tomorrow?” you say politely and smile. jisung quickly looks away and mumbles something before walking out in a rush.
maybe you're still daydreaming, but you swore you could see the tips of his ears turning a light shade of pink.
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“fuck, i’m so late!” you alternate between running and speed walking your way to your class. your alarm didn't go off this morning so when you finally awoke, it was up and out in a flash. “i'm so screwed!”
today is an important day. the teacher was going to go over a few things on a test that's due in a few weeks so you really needed to attend it to get an idea–but alas, here you are. hair disheveled, dried up drool on your chin and your socks mismatched with your backpack hanging off your shoulder.
you breathe a sigh of relief before stopping in front of the lecture hall doors. you take a deep breath and fix yourself up before reaching out to open the doors.
the doors suddenly swing open. the students exiting the hall. you stand in the middle of the students as they walk around you, engaging in conversations with their friends.
you frown in confusion, looking at the time on your phone. your eyes widen even more, bulging from the sockets.
“oh wow.. i really fucked up.” you were a lot later than you thought.
you look up to see jisung looking at his phone. today he's in a plain, black t-shirt and skinny jeans. a few chains hanging around his neck and converse.
“hey, ji!” you call out. he looks up at whoever is calling him before his face twists into disgust when he realises it's you. you ignore this, mainly because he rushes past you.
you frown and chase after him, trying to keep up with his speed–but he's too fast.
“hey! wait! i know you heard me, ji!!”
“don’t call me that. my name is jisung.” he mumbles.
“ok ok, sorry! just, i need help!”
“find it elsewhere.” his tone of voice is cold towards you; like always. again, you ignore it.
“please, i’m desperate! my alarm didn't go off and i clearly missed class! i know it was super important too and–can you slow down and listen to me?!” you huff.
jisung lets out an irritated sigh and looks at you; phone in one hand, earphones in the other. he stops in the middle of the corridor and looks at you.
you bend down, hands on your knees to catch your breath.
“you being late has nothing to do with me. it's your own fault for being late.” he says, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.
“yeah, i know.”
“you fucked up and now you want my help? how could i possibly help you?”
“i need your notes.”
“my notes? fuck no.”
“oh please, ji… sorry–jisung. i really, really need this.” you pout. jisung groans and rubs the back of his neck.
“ok, fine.” he sighs in defeat. you're taken aback by how easy it was for him to surrender his notes over to you; but you don't complain. he takes his notebook out of his bag and hands it to you. you cheer and open it up, looking at the notes.
his handwriting is beautiful. his notes are easy to follow, however, you've come to the realisation that looking at notes isn't going to be enough for you to get the information to stick in your mind.
“make sure to give it to me by the end of the day. i’m usually at the library.” he says as you flick through his notes. “if you can't find me, find minho. he's my roommate.”
you don't respond due to the fact that so much information is causing your brain to go into information overload. jisung sighs again and, as he is about to walk away, you grab his arm.
“wait!” you make a quick mental note of how soft his skin is and how muscular he feels. jisung looks at your hand that's on him, feeling heat quickly rise to his cheeks and his heart to thumb erratically in his chest.
“your hand.” he whispers. you lean in close to get a better understanding of what he just said.
“pardon?”
“hand. your hand. please remove it.”
“oh!” you quickly remove your hand from him. jisung clears his throat and looks down, hoping that his long hair covers his face to hide the blush that's happily sitting on his cheeks.
you see it though and make a note of how adorable he looks. you feel your own heartbeat skipping beats and beating erratically but you put it down to you having to sprint to class.
“i don't think this will be enough.” you start. he looks up at you. “the notes.. i don't think it's going to be enough.”
“well, there's a library and also the internet. there’s this thing called google, so use that.”
“teach me.” his eyes widen in shock.
“t-teach you?! fuck no, yn!”
“please, jisung! just until the test is over! i really, really need this. i’m desperate and, although your notes are so perfect, it's going to take a lot more than notes for me to understand it!”
“then ask the tutor for a one-on-one! or ask your friend!!” he stutters in shock. his cheeks are now bright red.
“you know the tutor doesn't do one-on-ones and my friends don't even take this class! oh please, jisung. pleeeaseee. pretty pretty pleeease.” you pout, giving him puppy eyes.
“yn…”
“i’ll buy you your coffee everyday for a full month.”
“... just my coffee?”
“what sweet treat do you like?”
“...cheesecake.” he answers reluctantly.
“then coffee and cheesecake on me for a full month!” jisung runs his fingers through his hair slowly, a soft, defeated sigh leaving his lips as he contemplates.
“you really need this, huh.” you nod your head fast to the point of dizziness. “you drive a hard bargain, yn. but fine.”
you cheer and grin widely.
“on some conditions though.”
“what?”
“we study in the library, you don't be late and we only do this until the test is over! after that, i won't teach you anymore.”
“yes sir.” you salute. “oh, do you want my contact information? might make it easier to set up study dates.”
“study dates?”
“yeah! i assume we have different schedules due to different classes, so it's better to text or call each other so we know when to meet up!”
“true.. ok, fine. give me.” you tell jisung your contact information. he phones you and you smile as you save his contact information.
“thank you so much, jisung! you're the best!” you say before sprinting off to find your friend leaving a flustered jisung bewildered in the middle of the corridor.
“study dates, huh.. i kinda like that.”
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“dude, chill. you're just going to the library to study” jisung’s roommate laughs as he watches jisung scurrying around the place as he packs his bag.
minho is relaxing on jisung’s bed, shirtless and in sweats with round glasses sitting on the bridge of his nose whilst eating an ice pop. him and jisung have been the best of friends since university started and he became jisung’s roommate.
since then, they've both been inseparable. many people speculate that something is going on between the two of them, indicating a relationship–minsung, they call them.
“i am chill.” jisung mumbles as he shoves in a few too many pens into his pencil case.
“yeah, suuuure.” minho laughs as he licks and sucks on his popsicle. “i’ve watched you run around the place like a headless chicken.”
“dude, please hush.” jisung looks at minho just as some sticky sweet ice drops onto minho's chest. he scoops it up with his fingers and eats it. jisungs sighs “do you have to eat that on my bed?”
“yeah. problem?” minho smirks
“yes. quite a few actually. you're going to get the sheets sticky!” jisung whines.
“not the first time i've heard that.” minho laughs at his own joke. jisung rolls his eyes but the corner of his lips turn upright into a smile as he holds back his laugh.
“you're disgusting.”
“yeah? and you're a mess right now, bro.” minho places the wooden popsicle stick on jisung's side table before swinging his legs around to plant his feet on the floor.
he stands and walks to jisung, ruffling his hair a few times.
“you're just going to study, that's all. it's not that big of a deal, bro. unless….” minho smirks and wiggles his brows at jisung.
“unless what? what are you implying, minho?” jisung says as he crosses his arms across his chest and raises his brow.
“unless you, oh i don't know, like her.” jisung's eyes widen a little and he clears his throat, turning his head to avoid eye contact with minho. “aha!! i knew it! you do like ‘em!”
“no, i don't. fuck off, minho.” jisung mumbles and rushes to his desk, messing and organizing a few things to ‘look busy.’
minho skips over to jisung with a smirk. “c’mon ji. we all know you've been smitten with yn since the very beginning. it's soooo obvious!”
“dude, please. i don't like her like that. and it's jisung–not ji!”
“ahuh. whatever you say, dude.” minho laughs.
“plus, she probably doesn't like me in that way..” jisung mumbles before sighing softly.
“have you asked her that?”
“well… no but–”
“then how do you know?”
“i just do, ok?! enough with the questions, minho. don't you have that media assignment to do or something?”
“nope.” minho says, popping the p in an obnoxious way. “all done, which means i am a free man.”
“no one is a ‘free man’ in university, minho.” jisung laughs.
“ugh, you're right. even though one assignment is done, i still have a gazillion more.” minho runs his fingers through his long, shaggy hair. “speaking of which, i best start with at least one of them.”
“good luck, man. you'll do great.” jisung says sarcastically, paring it with a sarcastic grin.
“fuck you. good luck with yn, jisung.” minho turns around and walks out of jisung's bedroom. “hope you get laid!” he shouts.
“fuck you.” jisung laughs. minho sticks his middle finger up at jisung before laughing and closing his bedroom door.
with the last of his things packed, he zips up his back. he checks one last time in the mirror, fixing his hair and spraying his best perfume onto his neck. he puts his hand up to his mouth, huffing on it before sniffing. pulling a face, he grabs a mint and pops it into his mouth, sucking on it as he puts on his shoes and a leather jacket.
“it’s just a study thing. it's not that serious. calm down, jisung.” he mumbles as he laces up his shoes.
but he can't stop his heartbeat from thumping loudly against his ribcage and excitement to rush through his body. his excitement is so big, it makes him shake.
“it’s not a big deal. she probably doesn't like you that way.” he continues to mumble in an attempt to calm himself down as he takes one last look in the mirror. a smile slowly creeps up onto his face and a small squeal escapes from the back of his throat.
“fuck! i’m so screwed.”
minho hears this and laughs at his friend's excitement before putting on his headphones. if there's one thing minho loves, is seeing his best friend happy and over the moon. he just hopes he won't get hurt.
“cute.” minho says to himself before typing away at his keyboard. jisung leaves the bedroom and shouts a goodbye to minho before heading out to the library.
nervous doesn't describe how jisung is feeling. as he walks to the library, his legs start to feel like jelly and the urge to turn back strong the closer he gets to his destination. he hopes that you're not there first just so he has time to calm himself down.
he even tries to listen to music in hopes that it would calm him down somewhat. but the soothing sounds of violins and cellos do nothing (he even tried listen to a few seconds of whale noises but even that was useless)
“we’re just studying. nothing more.” he repeats under his breath as he walks inside the library.
the place is nicely decorated, modern with a hint of an historic touch. students at tables and little cubicles, headphones on and studying. some in groups, whispering as they do projects of various kinds. some making the most of how quiet it is to take a quick nap. the occasional rustling of snack packets paired with the occasional crunch breaks the silence every so often.
it's silent but it's lively.
jisung says a few hellos to some students he recognises (either from classes they take together or them being minho's friends) as he searches the area for you.
his heart thumping as he searches. he silently cheers when he can't see you because he has a chance to calm down, but, as he walks to an empty table at the very back of the room, his victory is cut short as he sees you sitting there; ready and waiting.
you have your back to him (and to everyone else) and you're hunched over your notebook. jacket resting on the back seat with your bag on the floor, by your side. jisung takes a quick, small peek over your shoulder to see what you're doing only to see small, quick doodles on the page from boredom.
his heart swells a little as it's another thing he's learnt about you. just when he thinks you couldn't get any more perfect.
“hey, yn.” he whispers only to realise that you won't hear him no matter how many times he calls for you due to the music that's blasting from your earphones. he makes a quick mental note of who you're listening to before trying to get your attention again.
“hey, yn.” he places his hand on your shoulder to which you jump at, causing jisung to jump at your reaction. you look behind you as you take out your earbuds, sighing in relief.
“jesus, jisung. you frightened me.”
“sorry, yn. i didn't mean to.”
“no, it's ok. my music may have been a little too loud.” you laugh as you put them away and jisung sits next to you on one of the chairs.
“you know you'll get tinnitus if you keep doing that.”
“yeah… i know. it's a bad habit but music sounds better loud, y‘know!” jisung nods in agreement before pulling out his notebook and pencil case.
you watch him lean down. you take the time to admire him. his hair soft and fluffy. you have to resist the urge to run your fingers through it. a faint smell of strawberries and flowers emits from his hair; a sickly sweet yet pleasant smell.
his skin is dewy and perfect; not a blemish in sight. a beauty mark sits close to his lips. it's a small mark so it's no wonder you never recognised it before.
you notice the way his biceps bulge and flex with every motion of his arms. the chains from his neck dangle a little and his aftershave wafts towards you and tickles your nose hairs.
“you smell so good.“ you mumble. jisung looks at you.
“excuse me?”
“you smell so fucking good.” you repeat and lean in close to him. your hair tickles his jawline and chin as you smell the skin of his neck. “what do you use?”
“...i–urm, i don't know. i just picked it up when i was shopping.” you hum and nod. jisungs soft cheeks slowly start to feel very hot. “personal space, yn. ever heard of it?”
“oh!! sorry. my bad. i didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.” you laugh awkwardly as a awkward silence falls upon you both.
jisung turns his head away from you so you can't see him but his cheeks are very red and hot as his heart beats fast.
you were so close to him. so very, very close. he thought he was going to have a heart attack. he could smell you and to him, you smell so delicious and sweet; like vanilla cheesecake.
“this is not good for my heart.” he mumbles to himself.
“by the way” you begin. jisung looks at you. you slide a cold coffee and cheesecake in the middle of you both. “told you i’d stick to my end of the bargain.”
“i didn't expect you to do it so soon, yn. it's only the first session.”
you shrug. “a deals a deal.” jisung takes the cheesecake and coffee, sipping on it and humming softly as the bitter, cold taste coats his tastebuds and the caffeine enters his system.
“i didn't know what flavoured cheesecake you like so i hope it's ok.”
“what flavour is it?”
“strawberry”
“mhm, not bad.”
“you don't like strawberry?” you say with a small pout. he shrugs.
“it's fine. not the worst. but it's too sweet for me. i’m a vanilla kinda guy.”
“aah, ok. i’ll make a mental note of that.” you say as you tap your temple, laughing softly. jisung lets out a small puff of air from his nose. you see the corner of his lips curl into a small and that makes you feel like he's accepted you.
“now, enough chitchat. i actually want to be done in a decent time so, let's begin?”
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“sooooo” jisung looks up at minho, his chopsticks half hanging from his mouth, resting on his bottom lip.
the smell of spicy, instant ramen fills the air. minho cooked some food for the two of them as they have both been studying hard for upcoming tests and assignments.
instant ramen with a slice of cheese on top. rice cakes, fish cakes and other yummy goodnesss swim in the broth. the kitchen looks a mess, pots and pans scattered everywhere–it contributes to the rest of the dorm with the various clothing and shoes scattered around.
“soooo…” jisung repeats, eyebrows raised. his bangs are tied back in a pink hair tie (your pink hair tie), a white vest top and sweats on his body. minho is also in sweats but with an anime print t-shirt and a sanrio clip to hold back his bangs and a pore strip on his nose; getting tighter and tighter by the second.
“have you asked her yet?”
“asked her what?” jisung takes some noodles and a fish cake, putting them on a small, separate plate before grabbing some kimchi.
“dude.” minho rolls his eyes and lets out a long, irritable groan. “for being smart, you sure are dumb.”
“you're just dumb through and through.” jisung smiles playfully as minho sticks his middle finger up at his best friend.
“fuck you.” minho takes a rice cake that's soaked in the ramen broth. he chews it, the sound of sticky, chewy rice cake emits from his mouth. “anyways! have you asked yn about the party?”
jisung lets out a slow grunt. “not this again, minho.”
“what?!” minho says with a shrug as he continues to chew and talk.
“i already told you, and eeeeveryone else. i don't want a party or anything of the sort, minho. i just want it to be a nice, quiet day.” jisung’s eyes drift to the half chewed rice cake that's being tossed around in minho's mouth. he pulls a face in disgust. “and can you please not talk with your mouth full?”
“you're such a prude.” minho rolls his eyes but swallows his food regardless. “anyways, you know me, changbin and chan won't let you have a quiet birthday!”
“yeah, no shit.” jisung rolls his eyes as he slurps on his noodles. he wipes his mouth with a napkin before munching on some kimchi. “still don't understand why you all decided to plan a birthday party without my knowledge knowing full well i said no in the beginning.”
“dude, you're so boring.” minho jests. “it's your birthday!” he emphasise. “you're supposed to have a party, eat lots of cake and junk. drink beer, hang out with friends and maybe, get laid.”
he wiggles his eyebrows at jisung and laughs softly. with a heavy sigh, jisung puts his chopsticks down.
“no matter what, you're going to go through with this, aren't you?”
“yup!” minho obnoxiously pops the P. “plus, things have already been ordered and organised for it. we already have a few people who confirmed they're attending.”
“who?”
“mhm–” minho puts down his chopsticks and thinks, looking at the ceiling as he does. “felix from fashion design. hyunjin from art. seungmin from business studies and jeongin who is also from fashion design.”
“how do you know all these people?”
“well, unlike some–” minho's eyes widen as he looks at jisung, indicating he's talking about him in particular “–some of us actually get out. plus, chan is like a social butterfly and changbin is charismatic. put them two together and well, people can't say no.”
“yeah, true. i remember when they begged me to work on a track or something for their music assignment.”
“they both practically dragged you to do it.” minho laughs.
“only because you told them i said yes without me knowing about the situation!”
“because i knew you'd say no! you have a talent for this stuff, jisung. don't let it go to waste.”
“thanks.” he mumbles, hanging his head low in embarrassment and awkwardness.
“is that… is that a blush i see?!” minho smirks.
“me? blush? for you?! hell no!” jisung frowns. “the ramen is spicy, that's all.”
“dude… it's mild.”
“...fuck you.”
“so, are you going to ask yn or nah?”
“if it gets you and everyone else off my back, then sure”
“good. make sure you do!” jisung opens and closes his hand, mimicking minho's yapping.
“yeah yeah yeah. can we stop talking about this party and eat?”
“just looking out for ya, man. i know how much you like ‘em!”
“i know. i appreciate it, minho.” minho nods and continues eating the ramen. jisung, on the other hand, is now lost in thought.
how the hell is he going to get the courage to ask you something like that?
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the study sessions are slowly coming to end. you kept up with your end of the deal, providing jisung with an endless amount of coffees and cheesecakes whilst he has provided you with an endless amount of insights.
one thing you have learnt about him is that he is smart. he knows how to do things with just a quick glance. he's good at explaining things so it's not confusing.
you've been stuck on a problem for some time and no amount of teachers advice and youtube videos helped you. all it took was five minutes of jisung explaining the solution and it clicked.
today, however, you are alone in the library. jisung messaged you to let you know that he wasn't going to make it. you felt sad and a little heartbroken–you’ve become so accustomed to jisung's presence that you feel a little cold and lonely right now.
you can't concentrate. the music you're blasting down your ears isn't helping either. the text in your book is slowly starting to merge into one big splooge of text. the information just isn't getting through to you and it's frustrating.
you sit back in your seat and sigh as you take your headphones off and throw them on the table.
“this is pointless.” you mumble. “i can't concentrate. maybe i should just skip it.”
you take your phone and browse through social media before subconsciously opening up the food app. your mouth salivates as you look at the various burgers, fries, pizza and sweet treats–and then your stomach growls.
“maybe i’m just hungry. that's why i can't concentrate.” you pack your things and head to the university cafeteria. the menu looks dull so you settle on a simple sandwich and drink.
the cafeteria is packed. the atmosphere is buzzing with the endless chatter of students. you take your seat and pick up your sandwich.
it's a standard ham salad sandwich with some dressing on. the slices of ham and lettuce (too much lettuce for that matter), tomatoes and other salad stuff squished together by two slices of thick, white bread, smothered in dressing.
you take a few bites. it's ok. it's not bad but you've had better. the bread is a little dry for your liking but the dressing takes that away. you open the cap of your bottled drink and take a few swigs to help wash it down.
“what do we have here?” you turn your head in the direction of the voice–that thick aussie accent you know all too well.
“ew. go away chan. you're disturbing my peace.”
“charming. don't think that's something you should say to someone you haven't seen in a while.” he says with a pout as he walks to your table and sits down. he's joined by another man, a friend of his, perhaps. he sits opposite you.
“and whose fault is that, huh? maybe if you answered my calls or texts every once in a while.”
“sorry, yn. i’m just a busy man, y’know.” chan grins as he leans back in his seat, brimming with confidence.
“yeah. too busy being the campus whore.”
“blah blah blah. least i’m getting some.” he elbows you in the side a few times. “what are you getting, huh?” he jests.
“a degree? y'know that thing i came here for in the first place.”
“oh ha ha. very funny, yn.” chan mocks, rolling his eyes at you before stealing your sandwich and taking a bite.
the male opposite you clears his throat as a way of telling you both “hi, i’m still here.”
“oh! yn, this is minho. minho, yn.” minho's eyes widen a little and his lips twitch into a small smile.
“so, you're yn. nice to put a face to the name.“ he grins.
“you know me?” you blink a few times in confusion.
“i’m jisung’s roommate.” you mentally slap yourself. of course!
“oh my god. i’m so sorry. i didn't realise! i’m so bad with names.” you whine. minho laughs and brushes it off.
“and how do you know jisung, yn?” chan says with a mouthful of food; your food to be exact. you glare at him, daggers darting out of your eyes and straight into chan as you snatch your sandwich back off him.
“jisung’s my private tutor as of right now.”
“oh.” chan nods before his eyes suddenly light up. he looks at minho for confirmation. “wait, hold up.”
minho nods and smirks. “nah. really?!” you watch the two men talk in code as they communicate by facial expressions and a stings of “ohs” and “yeahs”
“uh, hello. i’m still here!” minho laughs softly.
“sorry, yn.” you shrug it off and eat your sandwich. “how do you two know each other by the way. chan has never mentioned you before.”
“good. keep it that way.” you say coldly, mainly aiming it at chan. chan pouts and nuzzles into you, head on shoulder. he looks at you with puppy eyes and a pout.
“aww. don't be like that, bestie. you secretly love me.” you flick his forehead.
“me and chan are childhood friends. haven't been able to get rid of him since.” chan smiles at your sweet implication. “he's like a parasite. or a fruit fly in the summer.” his smile drops and now, it's your turn to give chan a big, sarcastic grin–teeth and all.
“rude.” he mumbles. you shrug and finish off your sandwich.
“so, jisung is your tutor.” minho speaks. you nod. “are you attending his party?”
“party? what party?” you look at chan and minho. minho sighs a little and runs his fingers through his hair.
“i warned him.” he mumbles under his breath in irritation before looking at you and smiling softly. “me, chan and a few others are organising a birthday party for jisung.”
“his birthday is coming up?!” your eyes widen. “when? i should get him a gift”
“14th.”
“14th?! that's pretty soon.” you mumble.
“jisung told me he would invite you.” you shake your head no. minho rubs the back of his neck. “well, this is awkward.”
“it’s ok. maybe he has his reasons as to why he didn't mention it to me. no biggie.” you say with a smile. minho nods before a few minutes of silence dawn upon the three of you.
“out of curiosity.” you break the silence. “how is jisung in general?” minho tilts his head to the side. “it's just he seems so….” you think for a second, thinking of the right (and nice) word to use “... cold towards me.”
“cold?”
“mhm. he seems so bitter towards me and i don't know why. we barely even talked in class but when we did, he would always tell me i’m making too much noise and to hush.” you slowly start to feel slightly irritated.
“jisung is fine with me.” he says with a. shrug. “he's pretty chill around me.” you huff.
“i know he can be friendly because whenever i see him in the corridors talking to someone, he smiles and is so friendly!”
“what’s he likes now, yn?”
“well, now that we've been spending more time with each other, he's… i don't know… avoiding me to some degree? he won't make eye contact with me. he doesn't like it when i touch him.”
chan raises his brow and looks at minho, both men thinking the same thing. chan puts you in a gentle headlock and ruffles your hair.
“hey!! get off me!!” you push chan a few times, using all your strength to make him release you.
“you're pretty naive, yn.” chan laughs, continuing to ruffle your hair. he ignores your screams and yells, minho laughing at the two of you.
finally, chan let's you go. you push him with all the strength you have left before fixing your hair and glaring at him. chan pouts and nuzzles into you once again.
“i’m sorry, yn. forgive me?” he puckers his lips and makes kissing noises, edging closer and closer to you. you hold him at arm's length.
“ok ok!! just quit doing that!!” chan laughs and pats your head gently.
as fast as he was in the cafeteria, jisung is soon out of it after seeing you and chan, with nothing but festering jealousy in his stomach.
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you bounce through the library to your designated spot at the very back, coffee and cheesecake in each hand with your bag swinging on your shoulder.
jisung is there, punctual, as always. but something seems a little off. the air around him seems thick and suffocating–dark even.
“hey!” your cheerful voice ringing in his ears, making his heart beat fast. you sit next to him and slide over the coffee and cheesecake.
today he's dressed in a yellow and orange flannel shirt and white tank-top. black jeans and boots to accommodate. a few of his nails are painted in black, chipping from wear and tear.
he gives you a cold nod of the head. you frown a little but choose to ignore it as you take your books and pens out of your bag.
“so, what's the plan for today?” jisung shrugs. “...ok, well how about we go over that question i was struggling with?”
“k” he reluctantly moves closer to you. the scent of cinnamon and vanilla wafts towards you and tickles your nostrils, making you let out a small hum of satisfaction.
“you smell good, jisung.”
“mhm, thanks.” you let out a silent sigh. something is wrong with him and you don't know why. is it something you've done? something you haven't done?
jisung is being very dry and sour with you. his usual method of teaching you is that he would go into detail and repeat until you'd understand it, today, however, he's very short and sharp.
“i don't understand.” you say. jisung sighs, a long irritated sigh. you bite your lip, thinking that you've done something to hurt him in any possible way.
“what don't you get?”
“all of it…” he sighs again and rubs his face. his eyebrows furrow together in irritation. the jealousy he is feeling in his stomach is festering, becoming more and more intense.
every time he looks at you, he is reminded of the way you and chan were together. he hates that. how could you fall for someone like chan? he thought you were better than that. his head swimming with negative and harsh thoughts.
before he can stop himself, the words just spill without any control. “why don't you get chan to do it for you.”
you blink. “chan? what does he have to do with this?”
“i mean, you two are close are you not?”
“i mean.. well, yeah, i guess.” you shrug. “he does get on my nerves sometimes though. he is such a pain! but he's a good gu–”
“i thought you were better than that, yn.’ he spits.
“the fuck is that supposed to mean?” you feel the bubbling of rage in your stomach as you stare at jisung, who stares at you back. the jealousy has consumed his body and it's too late to back out now.
“as in, i thought you had standards. chan? of all people? he's a whore, yn. everyone knows that he sleeps around on campus and you chose him?!”
“i don't appreciate the way you're talking about him, jisung.”
“it’s the truth, yn! and you know it so why are you with him?! you can do sooo much better than him!!”
“oh yeah?” you challenge. “then who is good for me, mhm? please, enlighten me?”
jisung freezes. he looks away and chews his bottom lip. you scoff and pack your things in a hurry.
“i don't have to listen to this bullshit. you've been in a shit mood with me this whole time, which is fine. everyone has bad days. what's not ok, however, is you taking it out on me and bad mouthing the people i care about.” you stand up, swinging your bag onto your shoulder. jisung stares at one spot of the desk, burning holes into it. “text me when you're in a better mood.”
you walk out, leaving jisung to think about what he has just done.
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“jisunggggg. sungieeee. knock, knock. let me innn!” the sound of minho's high-pitched, cheery voice irritates jisung to the bone. he lets out a slow and irritated groan, hot puffs of air slowly exhaling from his nostrils.
he pushes his glasses up his nose and runs his fingers through his unwashed hair. sitting at his desk in the same baggy band t-shirt and sweats from a few days ago, he checks his phone for the nth time, only to be disappointed.
he hasn't spoken to you nor seen you since that day. in class, it's worse. he's tried to catch your eye a few times, smiling when he does, only for you to turn away. he spent days loathing in his own self pity, locking himself up in his room and only coming out for food, bathroom breaks and class.
minho has had enough. not only is jisung's mood ruining the atmosphere, but minho has no idea as to what happened that day. he was home when jisung came back to the dorm, looking like he was on the verge of tears.
when he asked, jisung always gave the same answer of “mind your own business.”–and he has; for several days now.
“let me in, jisung.” the repetitive sounds of minho's knuckles against the wood door cause jisung's stomach to bubble more intensely with anger–until he finally snaps.
he rushes to the door and swings it open, brows furrowed together. minho's smug grin makes him foam at the mouth.
“what part of leave me alone don't you understand, minho?” jisung's words dripping with poison. minho shrugs it off.
“all of it.” he pushes past jisung, making himself at home in his bedroom. jisung has no time to protest, all he can do is watch his best friend jump on his bed and rest on his back, arms behind his head.
with a heavy sigh, jisung walks back to his desk. he turns his back on him, hoping that if he ignores his friend, he will get bored and eventually leave. minho watches his friend pick up and put down his phone several times to the point where minho feels irritated by it.
“so?” minho starts
“so?” jisung repeats
“going to tell me what's happened? haven't seen you this down in a while.”
“nope. i'm good.”
“you can't keep moping around the place, jisung.”
“i can and i will.” minho groans and stands up, walking out of the bedroom. jisung mentally cheers only for it to be cut short when minho throws his jacket at jisung.
“put it on.” it's more of a demand than a sentence, but nonetheless, jisung obliges because if he doesn't, minho will force it on him.
“where are we going?”
“to the cafe.” minho puts on his shoes, jisung following suit.
“aah, dude.. i don't really fe–”
“shut up, we're going to the cafe whether you want to or not. a change of scenery might cheer your moody ass up because, to be quite honest, i’m tired of seeing your gloomy ass face.” he looks at jisung who is frowning at him. “in the nicest way possible, of course.”
jisung rolls his eyes before following minho to the local (and one of his favourite) cafes.
it's a small, local café with an old fashioned sense of style to it. the tables and chairs are worn. cushions on the chairs losing their stuffing and the tables scratched and chipped. the décor is outdated, indicating that the café has been there for quite a few years; but it feels like home to some.
the bell above the door chimes as minho and jisung walk in. they walk to the counter and say their orders before taking their lunch and drinks and sitting at a table.
jisung takes a sip of the coffee. he feels the ice cold beverage trickling down his esophagus and into his empty stomach. minho munches on his chicken salad sandwich, watching his friend look in his drink and ponder.
“i fucked up.” jisung mumbles, lost in thought. the more he thinks about you, the more he can feel the tears threaten to spill down his cheeks. minho tilts his head to the side and as he is about to open his mouth and encourage his friend to continue, a familiar sound in the form of a laugh causes jisung's head to shoot up and look in that direction.
his eyes widen. he feels relief and happy to see a smile finally on your face; but then that same, the green monster in the form of jealousy parks itself on his shoulder and starts whispering in his ear.
minho watches jisung's jaw muscles clench. his facial expression goes from relief to jealousy. minho follows jisung's gaze and raises his brow at the sight of you and chan.
chan is being his usual, goofy self. he's telling you typical dad jokes and being a little grotest by telling you his latest hook-up details. you push him by the arm and roll your eyes, sipping your coffee in the process. chan continues to joke around with you, play fighting a little by wrapping his arm around the back of your neck loosely and rubbing the top of your head with his knuckles.
“i can't fucking stand this.” jisung mutters bitterly under his breath. minho turns and looks at his friend who is green with jealousy.
“stand what?”
“seeing someone as precious and innocent as yn be with someone like chan!” minho blinks a few times.
“what do you… jisung, what do you think yn and chans relationship is?”
“isnt it obvious? they're going out!” minho gives jisung a few blank stares and blinks before bursting out into laughter, choking on his own saliva in the process. “what?!”
jisungs cheeks flush red with embarrassment but also with anger. his own friend laughing at his statement, finding amusement in his sorrows.
“are you serious? please tell me you're joking?” minho stutters through his giggles.
“dead serious.” jisung says, deadpan. “don't you see the way they are with each other? i saw you all the other day, in the cafeteria! chan's arm around yn and them being all…. lovey!!”
“oh my god.” minho calms himself down. “you really are serious!”
“i told you! i even asked yn about it and well… it didn't go so well.”
“is that why you've been so moody and upset lately?” jisung nods his head slowly, feeling some type of guilt. minho sighs heavily, wondering how he can soften the blow of the news he's about to give his best friend.
“jisung…” minho starts. “yn and chan are not dating.” jisung's face drops.
“excuse me?”
“they're not dating. they're just childhood best friends. apparently they've known each other since they were kids. “
“so you're telling me.. that i got it all wrong when i saw you three in the cafeteria?“ minho slowly nods whilst giving a sympathetic smile. jisung sits back in his seat in disbelief. “why did chan never mention yn?! fuck, i fucked up… i really, really fucked up…”
“oh, c’mon. it can't be that bad.” minho tries to lighten the situation.
“dude. i told her i thought she had standards! i called her best friend a whore!”
“i mean, chan is a whore. he knows he is and he doesn't hid–”
“dude, please.” jisung interrupts. “not right now.” minho shrugs and sips his coffee whilst jisung rubs his face whilst groaning. “what do i do?”
“well.” minho puts down his coffee. “you make it right. admit you were in the wrong. explain how you were a jealous lil guy because you like her and that you fucked up.”
“and how do i do that? she’s been avoiding me for weeks and it’s not like i can go up to her right now and be like oh hey yn, sorry i called your best friend a whore oh, by the way, i like you.” jisung mocks himself in a high pitched voice, his face turning red in frustration.
“you're so dramatic.” minho rolls his eyes with a soft, yet heavy sigh. “for a smart guy, you're pretty dumb too.”
“pft, am not!” jisung scoffs and folds his arms across his chest. “... only when it comes to stuff like this.” he mumbles. “i just… don't know what to do or how to fix it. i really, really like her, minho.”
“ok? and? what do you want me to do about it? there's no point telling me about your feelings for yn. i'm not the one that fucked up and then decided to hold myself up in my room to drown in my own self-pity.” minho says with a shrug.
to the outside world, minho's words sound harsh but to jisung, it's a reality check.
he sighs softly for the nth time as he glances over at you. he watches you laugh and smile with chan, soaking in your beauty and the way you glow with happiness.
“to make it easier for you.” minho breaks the few seconds of silence between the two, feeling a little responsible for his friend in need. “i may have mentioned your birthday party to yn.”
“what?! why?”
“bro, you weren't going to mention it! so i just.. did you a favour.” minho shrugs, a smug look on his face.
“... is she coming?”
minho shrugs. “dunno. she seemed interested at least but this was before you called her best friend a whore so–”
“that was an accident. i didn't mean to.. i just got too–”
“worked up? jealous perhaps?” minho says, or rather states, with a raised brow. jisung hums and nods his head slowly, teeth chewing on his bottom lip.
minho chews on his straw as he watches his friend think. he can see the cogs turning in jisung's skull. jisung is inexperienced when it comes to relationships so seeing him like this, brings minho slight amusement.
“look, jisung. if she turns up, you approach her and apologise whilst also telling her how you feel.” minho holds his hand up to jisung who is just about to protest but is quick to close his mouth and listen. “if she doesn't turn up, you find her the next day, apologise and tell her how you feel. heck, text her if you have to!”
“dude… you know i can't do that!”
“ok. then you have the other option, which is to keep wallowing in your self pity and watch yn from the sidelines.” minho shrugs. “i don't know dude. be the main character for once. you clearly like her so take the chance.”
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jisung's birthday rolled around. you haven't heard nor spoken to him since the argument so you didn't originally plan on turning up to his birthday party; but chan being chan is forcing you to go as his plus one.
“is this ok?” you smooth down your party outfit as you present yourself to chan. chan is sitting at your dressing table, dressed in blue, skinny jeans, a compression shirt that hugs and molds his muscles and combat boots. a silver chain around his neck, earrings in one ear and a few rings on his fingers.
he looks up from his phone and smirks playfully. he wolf whistles at you to which you scoff and roll your eyes at.
“looking good there, yn.”
“really? i threw this together at the last minute.’
“you look great, don't worry. you're gonna knock ‘em dead.” chan laughs.
“i really don't want to go, chan.” you groan.
“weeeell, too late. you're coming with me to this party, even if i have to throw you over my shoulder and carry you there.”
chan has heard about your little argument with jisung from minho. the two of them had a drink together during the week and chan listened to minho vent about jisung.
once minho mentioned the fight did it all come together. you've been feeling down and withdrawn, not knowing what to do or how to deal with your feelings. you've put on a fake smile and basically faked your way through the weeks–but chan has known you for years so he can see through you, he just didn't want to press you.
you'll come to him when the time is right; you always do.
“do i have to?” you ask for the nth time whilst putting on your shoes. chan laughs at your contradicting actions and shakes his head before standing up.
“yes, you do. it'll be fun and hopefully, it'll lift your spirits.” you pout.
“i have been a little moody lately, haven't i?” chan raises his brows and scoffs.
“a little!? pur-lease! i thought knives were going to spawn out of your eyes at one point.”
“mhm.. i’m sorry chan. it's just been a long couple of weeks with a lot of thinking.” you sigh softly. chan elbows your side gently.
“hey. let's not think about that right now. let's go to this party, have a couple of drinks and a dance, yeah?” you nod slowly.
“not like i have a say in this.”
“that's my girl. now.” chan grabs your hand gently and pulls you to the front door. “let's go have some fuuuun!!!”
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it's loud. the bass of the music rings in your ears and shakes the ground beneath you.
it smells. the stench of stale cigarettes, sweat and alcohol tickles your nostrils and causes you to feel lightheaded and nauseous.
you've tried several times to turn away and head back but chan was always right there.
chan abandoned you to go chat up some girls so you're sat on the sofa, surrounded by people making out, drinking or passing out (if they haven't already)
you hold your red, plastic solo cup which is filled halfway with some punch. the smell is pungent and the taste is awful. it's too strong for your liking so you take small, delicate sips.
as the night rolls on, you have yet to see jisung. not that you want to but, it would help you feel some comfort and less suffocated to see a familiar face.
you glance at your phone screen. 11:20 pm. it's soon time for you to leave. you don't want to be here any longer than you have to and considering that chan has left you alone, you don't feel the need to be here any more.
you stand up from the couch to walk to the kitchen. you shimmy your way in and out of crowds of people who are dancing, talking or making out with someone that they won't remember tomorrow.
you pour your drink down the sink and throw away your empty cup. as you're about to turn and leave, a familiar voice is heard from behind.
“yn. hi.”
you turn on your heels and a sense of relief washes over you as you come face to face with a face you've been longing to see (even if you don't want to admit it)
you forget why you're so angry at him for a split second. his beauty never fails to make you feel star struck and silently go “wow.” but then you remember.
“hi.” you reply coldly.
“can i talk to you?” he shouts, hoping his voice isn't drowned out by the music.
“not right now. i was just about to leave.” you walk past him to leave. jisung grabs your arm gently to stop you. you look at him and he is quick to remove his hand.
“please? just… let me explain…” he chews his bottom lip, his brows scrunched together in the middle. you think for a second and sigh softly, nodding slowly.
“ok. fine. but make it quick.” you swear you see the corner of jisung's lips curl into a subtle smile, his eyes lighting up a little. he beckons you to follow him so you do.
you follow him outside. compared to inside, where it's hot and humid, the harsh, cold night air is refreshing and soothes your damp skin.
“look.” he starts as he stops walking to turn to you. “i know i was a complete asshole.” you scoff but don't say anything. “it's just… aah fuck, how do i say this.”
you watch jisung slowly become flustered. the tips of his ears turn red, his hands clammy as he shakes a little. he shuffles on his feet to shift his weight and avoids eye contact with you.
“fuck.. this is so hard… minho said it'd be easy once i get talking but fuck minho.” jisung rambles to himself. the anger you felt slowly disappears and is replaced with… joy?
your stomach feels a little bubbly and tingly with excitement as you watch this nerd, whom you've grown so accustomed to, become easily flustered and shy because of you.
“just say what's on your mind, jisung.” you say with a shrug. his eyes flicker at you for a second before looking to the ground.
“ok.. well…” he takes a deep breath. ”i like you and i always have and the reason why i got so pissed and called chan a whore, who i later found out was your childhood best friend, was because i was jealous of how close he was to you and i saw red and i didn't mean it. in fact, i've been cooped up in my bedroom in my own self-pity because i'm a coward and i don't deserve someone as wonderful as you and i’m really sorry. can you forgive me for being a lil silly?”
you blink at him several times. jisung dared take a breath during his little speech so all the information that has suddenly been laid on you, isn't going through your head right now.
“ah fuck.. i fucked up again, haven't i?” jisung shakes, his voice wavering as it breaks the tension in the air. his nerves shaking his body as a shaky hand picks at the skin around his fingernails. “god i knew i shouldn't have said anything. why did i take minho's dumb advice.”
“i… i don't know what to say, jisung. it's all so much.” you say in pure shock.
“oh, that's ok! i’m not looking for an answer right now. please, take your time. i just wanted you to know my true feelings and why i acted out. the last thing i want is for you to feel forced.”
“so let me get this straight. the reason you acted out is because you got jealous of chan, thinking that we were dating?” you watch jisung slowly nod his head, his cheeks turning pink; whether that's from embarrassment or from the harsh cold air. “and that you.. like me?”
jisung nods again. “silly, right?” he laughs, trying to soothe himself of the raging anxiety that's heavy in his heart and stomach.
“no.. no! not at all. i think it's kinda… cute.”
“cute?”
“yeah. i mean, well, being away from you has got me thinking about me, you and well.. us and how i feel.” jisung walks closer to you, closing the gap between you both.
“and how do you feel, yn?” you swallow a little. the atmosphere has suddenly shifted between you both. jisung is close to you, his body daring to press against you.
you can see every detail of his honey skin under the faint moonlight. the cold breeze sweeps between his hair strands. a faint hint of cinnamon and apple from his aftershave tickles and hugs your nose making you inhale deeply for more.
“at first, i was angry at you. i didn't understand why you were so angry. but i spoke to chan about it and during the conversation, he made me realise something.”
“what?” jisung encourages. he gingerly places his hands on your waist, unsure and testing the waters. his touch is as light as a feather and when you don't push him away, his grip becomes firm.
“that maybe, i like you too and i have for the longest time. i just never realised it because i thought you hated me but, when we spent all that time together, i started to notice the smallest of things about you and i found them to be so cute. but they're cute because it's you.”
you slowly run your hands up his chest to his shoulder. his breath hitches and body trembles from your touch. with more confidence, jisung pulls your body flush against his own, closing the gap completely.
“so, you like me too?” his voice dips to a whisper. you hum and nod slowly. “do you have any idea how happy that makes me?”
“why don't you show me.” you whisper against his lips, teasing him by brushing yours against his slowly and gently. they feel soft and plump, kissable even.
“you're playing a dangerous game, yn. you have no idea how long i've wanted you.”
“show me.” you whisper again, furthering your teasing by ever so lightly licking his bottom lip with the tip of your tongue.
“fuck.” jisung groans. his lips crash against yours in a heated kiss that's filled with longing. your eyes widen a little but are quick to flutter close. you melt into the kiss, the both of you becoming synchronised instantly.
you tilt your head to the side a little to allow jisung to deepen the kiss. he licks your bottom lip and you part your lips slowly.
his tongue slides in to meet yours and you're in a battle of dominance that you lose. jisung's hot kisses make you melt and crave for more. you forget about your surroundings, forget where you are. everything is a buzz in your ears and you can only focus on you, jisung and how your body is tingling and twitching.
jisung is the first to pull away. he pants heavily, his own body trembling with excitement.
“wow.” you hum in agreement. as soon as his lips are off yours, you want them back on you again; whether that's on your own lips or on your body, you don't care as long as you get to feel the softness again.
“is this real?” he asks.
“it's real.” you respond, giggling softly. “and i’m not drunk either so.”
“so, what does this make us?” jisung cautiously asks. he wants to have an idea of what you two are slowly becoming. he wants to make sure you're both on the same page.
“whatever you want us to be, jisung.”
“well, i want you to be mine. i want to show you off to the world, proudly. i want everyone to know that you belong to me. i want to spend every single second of the day with you and during the night, i want to spend every single second caressing your body from head to toe. i want to soak myself in every single bit of detail from your body. i want to drown you in pleasure and my love.”
you swallow and let out a small, shaky breath at the implications behind his words. your body trembles with excitement and anticipation from where tonight is going to end and for the future with jisung.
“then.. shall we go ditch the party and go back to mine? because i want that too.” with a fast nod of the head, jisung holds your hand and is quick to make way to yours.
“let's go and let's be quick. i want to make you mine, in more ways than one.”
#kwritersworldnet#wkcnet#straykidsland#skz fluff#stray kids fluff#han jisung#jisung#jisung fluff#han jisung fluff#han jisung x you#han jisung x reader#jisung x you#jisung x reader#skz x you#skz x reader#stray kids x reader#stray kids x you
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sorry I JUST sent you an ask but I just thought of Silco and Reader being like two catty old ladies- absolute besties that will catch up over a glass of wine and gossip like in that one clip where Wendy Williams says “Guess who’s jealous of Adele? BEYONCÉ.” And Silco just GASPS
GOD AS:DFKSD
men and minors dni
okay 'cause here's the thing, as much as sevika LOVES gossiping and gossip in general, she's terrible at it.she can keep a secret to her grave, and she's incredibly intuitive and good at reading people, but she refuses to prod into people's business.
so it's no wonder that the two people she's closest to in the world are huge gossips.
there are a lot of upsides to it. you, silco, and sevika can almost always be found bitching after a hard week together, trading little bits of gossip about the people around town and cackling together as you joke and unwind.
sevika loves that you and silco are close outside of her. it makes her feel like she's got her own little family.
and it's surprisingly helpful in her line of work to always be up to date on who's fucking, and who's fighting.
but, then again... being close with two expert gossipers means sevika's never able to keep a secret from one of you for long.
she'll be having a rough period, think she's hiding it well, then silco will approach her by the end of the day with a grimace and a cigar. "your wife told me about your condition this week. i apologize for making you work so hard today, i wasn't aware."
if she and silco get in an argument that lasts longer than two days, you're always sure to stick your nose in their business and sort it out for them.
"sevika, you've got dinner with silco tonight. he's taking you to an apology steak night. he's got his statement all written out, i'm sure you'll accecpt." you tell her on her way out of the door in the morning.
sevika sputters. "what makes you so sure?!"
"i helped him write it! i know you-- i know how to patch things up with 'ya." you tease, pinching her cheek.
sevika just scowls and takes off for work, your giggle replaying like music in her head for the rest of the day.
and sometimes, really, all sevika wants to do is spend time with you, but you're too busy talking shit with silco.
"so... guess who's jealous of ran?" silco asks slowly as he lights up a cigarello.
sevika watches with a mixture of exhaustion and adoration as you lean forward in your chair, gasping an excited, "who!?"
"theiram!"
you burst into applause and laughter, and sevika groans and rolls her eyes, joining you on the couch for a night of gossip she's certain to fall asleep half way through.
taglist!
@fyeahnix @lavendersgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner
@kissyslut @chuucanchuucan @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther
@sevikaspillowprincess @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @my-taintedheart
@glass-apothecary @macaroni676 @artinvain @k3n-dyll @sevsdollette
@ellieslob @xayn-xd @keikuahh @maneskinwh0re @raphaellearp
@iamastar @sevikitty @mascdom @nhaaauyen @annesunshiner
@mirconreadzztuff22 @veoomvroom @lushh-s3vik4s @katyawooga @lesbodietcoke
@strawberrykidneystone @sevikasfan @fict1onallyobsessed @greenhazes
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Hi hiiii I couldn’t resist to not slide into your inbox and request a Christmas fic based on this prompt with a Aemond who isn’t used to his girl’s flirty behavior and gets flustered soo easily👀 you can totally ignore this if you don’t like it<3333
“Since I can’t ride in Santa’s sleigh, can I ride you instead?” “Sorry, what?”
HI RUE ✨ Kinda put my own spin on this but I'm sure you'll love it <3
Can I Ride You Instead?
modern!Aemond x reader
Words: 1.6k
Warnings: smut, Aemond being a workaholic while his girl has needs
A/n: It's tiiiiime, happy 1st December!!
Main Masterlist // Christmas Masterlist
One more night in King’s Landing. You look out from the window at the lights in the city; street lamps; lively pubs; offices that have been abandoned until new year; and all the festive lights lining the highstreets. Conquest Street is your favourite place to be this time of year. You love the displays in the shop windows, the market in the square, the little wooden huts selling scarves and handmade jewellery, the smell of mulled wine, sugar and cinnamon, almost tangible in your nose and on your tongue. What you wouldn’t give to be there right now.
Aemond’s apartment is bleak by comparison. He doesn’t see the point in decorations, not when he’ll be spending Christmas at his family’s estate– at Dragonstone, Christmas is Alicent’s territory. Aemond’s place is clean, lit by lowlights with no bursts of colour or fairy lights and no tree.
He’s sitting at the dining table. The cold glare of his laptop shines over his face and reflects in the lenses of his glasses.
This boy never takes a break.
Term technically doesn’t end until tomorrow but everyone you know has already gone home to make the most of the break. Not Aemond. He wants to stay for as long as possible. He doesn’t talk about his family much, but you can put pieces together. You booked your own train ticket home according to his because you could think of nothing worse than leaving him alone on the run up to Christmas.
“Sit down, you’re making me anxious,” Aemond says, not looking up from the screen.
He’s been on the verge of irritation all day. You’re in the kitchen trying to make hot chocolate? Too much noise, he says. You’re at the dining table wrapping presents for your parents? Too distracting.
You take slow steps across the floor, behind his chair, draping yourself over his shoulders. He’s working on some project for an internship and simultaneously trying to get ahead on the research for his dissertation.
You love how he looks when he’s focused, the frown that means he’s utterly absorbed in what he’s doing. It’s not quite so endearing when he could be focusing on you instead.
Your arms wrap around him. He pushes his glasses up and puts a hand over yours, a featherlight touch. You want more.
“It’s getting late you say,” letting your lips ghost over his temple.
“It’s not even six.”
“You should take a break. We could order food?”
“Yeah, when I’m done with this, I just need to–”
“Aemond.”
Your arms fall away from him and he looks up at you with a slow breath. His expression is soft, his eyes slightly hooded, his lips fallen. He knows he's upset you.
“Aemond, it’s our last night together before Christmas.”
He shuts the lid of his laptop and leaves his glasses on the table. As much as you love how he looks with them on, there’s something about the unobstructed view of his face that never fails to take your breath away. Especially his eyes, one blue, one glass and made to imitate a sapphire, framed in a neat scar running down the left side of his face, an injustice of childhood.
He leans forward, snaking his hands to your waist, pulling you in towards him.
It’s an unfair move really. Suddenly all you want to do is run your fingers through his silver hair, tilt his chin up, hold his face in your hands.
“You’re right, darling,” he says, stroking his thumbs in circles where they fall against your belly. You feel the pressure of it through the knit jumper you wear. “Let’s go out. Pub? Restaurant? What’s the market thing on Conquest Street, didn’t you mention that a while ago?”
“It’s a bit late to go out now, I’d have to get ready.”
“We’ll stay in and watch a Christmas movie then, yeah?”
“I didn’t think you’d be in the mood for something festive.”
He makes a quick face. Not that long ago you’d tried to get him to watch The Muppet Christmas Carol, and he was far from impressed. What horrors will you have in store for him next? “Whatever you want. I want whatever you want.”
You coax him to the sofa, big and plush and expensive. Aemond throws a blanket over the two of you and with a few taps of his phone arranges the food. Without much deliberation you put on Love Actually, meeting Aemond’s eye with a wide grin.
He hides his face in his hands but survives the ordeal.
By the time the credits are rolling it’s not particularly late, but you’re dreading the morning. You’ll have to wake up early, pack a bag, then you and Aemond will go to the train station together and go your separate ways until the new year. A whole two weeks apart.
You cozy up to him, breathe in the smell of his aftershave.
“What now, another film?” He asks, trying to find the remote.
Another idea pops into your head. “We could do something else?”
Aemond catches your eye, trying not to smile. “Now let me think, what else could we possibly do, hmm?” He’s awful at playing coy and has been since the moment you met him. He’s too observant, too intent on the details to play dumb.
“Well,” you say, tracing fingertips along the material of his sweats, over his thigh, “since it is the season, and I can’t ride Santa’s sleigh, can I ride you instead?”
His mouth bursts into a messy smile. “Sorry, what?”
You mean to huff out of annoyance but it comes out like a laugh. “I’m trying to be cute!”
Aemond takes your chin in his fingers and your body freezes. “You really don’t need to try,” he says, and leans in to capture your lips with his.
The way Aemond kisses makes you melt every time. He’s slow and commanding, like he’s savouring every precious moment. His hands slide underneath your jumper, dragging along your skin to hold your waist. The promise of what will come next puts you on edge.
Sparse gasps for breath hum in the back of your throat. Aemond smiles against your lips and holds you tighter, dragging you to straddle his lap. He pulls away from your mouth, to your frustration, and places a wide palm at your navel, the waist of your jeans. “Stand up, need to get these off.”
You move off him and go to undo the top button, but Aemond grabs your wrists and pulls you closer. You watch as he smiles slightly, his fingers moving to undo the button and the zip. He’s teasing you, drawing out the anticipation as much as he can.
You sigh in relief once they’re off, dragging them down your legs, tossing them aside and coming back to straddle Aemond.
His hands settle at your thighs. “Look at you, so eager, hmm?”
“You can’t blame me, you’ve been ignoring me all day,” you say, grinding your clothed core against the bulge in his sweats. You can be teasing too, with drawn out movements of your hips.
Aemond’s jaw tightens. You can see he’s trying to stay smug. “Well, we’re fixing that now.”
You press a kiss to his cheek while your fingertips curl at the top of his sweats, dragging them down enough to free his cock. He’s taught you what he likes and if you were feeling patient you might have come to your knees before him, but at the slightest touch of Aemond’s fingertips against the fabric over your clit, you know what you need.
He pulls your panties to the side, dragging you along his leaking cock with a hand at your lower back. He’s hard and you’re achingly wet. He holds you where he wants you, lining himself up to pull you down onto his length. The stretch is sharp and sweet, hollowing you out and filling you perfectly.
Aemond’s head falls against the back of the sofa as you sink down.
“Does it feel good?” you tease him.
He’s breathless, helplessly watching the space where your bodies meet. “Fuck, perfect little pussy– feels so good,”
You cradle your arms around his head as you ride him, unhurried, hands restless as you feel his hair and the sides of his face, along his jaw.
Aemond hardly has to do anything, as soon as his fingertips are on your clit you feel your spine straighten and something inside you tighten. He circles over you lazily, watching your face with a soft, admiring kind of amusement.
“Right there,” you whisper, “don’t fucking stop.”
“Are you gonna come for me, darling?”
Your thighs are burning at the effort but you don’t care. You’re so close, so close.
“Beg me,” Aemond murmurs.
A slew of slurred and breathless pleas fall from your lips. You can feel the slickness between your legs, how easily he glides over you, how deep his cock reaches inside of you, pushing against the right spot.
Aemond hums as he grabs your hips with his free hand, fucking you faster and harder until you’re falling apart, convulsing, melting.
You fall against Aemond, holding each other closer as you wait for the deliriousness to fade away. Suddenly the air is unbearably cold. You cling to Aemond, to his warmth, content in his arms.
“Happy with your ride?” Aemond asks. You can hear him grinning.
You lift your head and rest it against his shoulder. The light of the TV catches in his features, his jaw, his cheeks, his nose, the details of grey in his right eye and the unnatural bright blue of his left.
“Can I go again?”
Aemond leans into you, pressing his nose against yours. “You can ride me as many times as you want, darling.”
No taglist, follow @ficsbygee and turn on post notifs for updates!
#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen x you#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond x reader#aemond x you#aemond x y/n#aemond fic#aemond targaryen fic#aemond smut#aemond targaryen smut#modern!aemond#hotd fan fiction#hotd fanfic#hotd fic#house of the dragon fanfic#house of the dragon fic#aemond oneshot#aemond one eye#gee-sus christmas#my fics
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guilty pleasure: a fic in fetlife messages
(joel miller x f!reader oneshot) 18+
summary: joel is a freak and is tired of keeping it to himself. he finally decides to make himself a fetlife profile and finds just the type of girl he's been looking for to match his freak: you.
warnings: 18+, smut, no outbreak au, set in 2017 so i could keep joel's birth year, young!joel, reasonably sized age gap (joel is 36, reader is 22), sexting, pet play, daddy kink, praise kink, degradation kink, pet names (puppy, sweetheart, princess, babygirl, little one, etc), degrading names (a few uses of doggy, mutt, and bitch), gentle domination (following rules for eating/bedtime/self care, daddy joel choosing your hair and outfits, etc), sending nudes/videos, reader has small tits, reader has a skintone that is described as “red” and “blushing”, reader has hair that can be put into a claw clip/pigtails/buns, joel may be a freak but he is very caring and considerate, please let me know if i missed anything <3
word count: 8.3k (not counting timestamps/usernames)
a/n: i started this in the car on friday night, here it is now. just something incredibly self indulgent to give my brain a break from working through strangers :) if you are experienced with fetlife or are a student at UT austin please suspend your disbelief incredibly high up in the air when you read this lol. yes puppyprincess12 is literally just me so what. thank u @chippedowlmug and @polaroidpascal for all the baby freak joel yapping and again to @polaroidpascal for making joel and reader's fetlife profiles that u can see at the end of the fic!! enjoy <3
divider by @saradika
November 7, 2017
(6:36 PM) puppyprincess12: hi sir :) i’m a little shy but i think you’re so handsome i just had to send a message. i like that picture of you at the party on your profile, you look nice in that shirt :) i hope we can get to know each other some more!!
(7:07 PM) texandaddy81: Hi there, princess. You’re a beautiful girl yourself. Got such pretty manners too, that’s what I like to see. I don’t mind that you’re a little shy, I gotta admit I’m new to this and pretty nervous myself. Let’s just have some fun gettin to know each other and let me know if anything I say makes you uncomfortable, alright?
(7:10 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir :)
(7:18 PM) texandaddy81: There’s those manners again. You always so polite and well behaved?
(7:20 PM) puppyprincess12: i try to be. i like being good. is that something you’d be interested in?
(7:24 PM) texandaddy81: I think it is. Not that interested in havin a brat that needs to be tamed all the time. Would rather be a Daddy to a good little girl like you. Is that the type of thing you’re looking for?
(7:26 PM) puppyprincess12: yes it is daddy :) i would love to be a good girl for you
(7:31 PM) texandaddy81: Well let’s hang on just a minute. I didn’t say anything about you calling me Daddy right away. That’s something I’d like to save for after we’ve gotten to know each other a little bit more.
(7:33 PM) puppyprincess12: i understand :( i’m sorry sir. not doing a very good job of proving how good i am :((
(7:35 PM) texandaddy81: It’s alright sweetheart, we’re both learnin here.
(7:41 PM) texandaddy81: Why don’t you introduce me to that cute stuffed animal you have in your profile picture?
(7:45 PM) puppyprincess12: :D she’s my favorite, she’s my ballerina bunny her name is odette like from swan lake :)
(7:52 PM) texandaddy81: She’s real cute. Seem to know a bit about ballet, you a ballerina in addition to being a puppy and a princess?
(7:54 PM) puppyprincess12: i used to be :(( not so much anymore since i started college, i don’t really have time anymore. but i miss it
(7:57 PM) texandaddy81: Jesus, college girl are ya? You sure you’re old enough to be on here, sweetheart?
(8:01 PM) puppyprincess12: uh huh i promise!! it’s on my profile but i’m 22 i graduate next year. i can show you my drivers license if you want
(8:06 PM) texandaddy81: No need, I believe you. You sure you wanna be talkin to somebody over 10 years older than you, though?
(8:10 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir im sure :) i am looking for a daddy after all, you kinda have to be older than me lol :)
(8:14 PM) texandaddy81: I guess that’s true. Well… if we keep talkin and I do decide I’d like to be your Daddy… what kinda things would you be lookin for us to do together? I don’t suppose any of the words in your username might give me any clues…
(8:22 PM) puppyprincess12: they might :)) like i said i like being good. i wanna follow orders and be praised for it and sometimes i do wanna be treated like a puppy :(( i’d like to try a leash and collar and have my daddy train me to behave and bark on command and come when im called and stuff like that
(8:31 PM) puppyprincess12: sorry was that too much :(( i understand if you wouldn’t be interested in that kinda stuff
(8:33 PM) texandaddy81: Sorry babygirl, didn’t message ya back right away cause I got a little bit lost in the thought of all that, if I’m being honest. I’d be very interested in having a little puppy girl like you.
(8:35 PM) puppyprincess12: oh yay :D i just know some people think it’s weird so i didn’t wanna scare you off
(8:38 PM) texandaddy81: Can’t scare me off, princess. Shame on anyone who’s made you feel weird for being interested in that. My rule is if you like it, if it makes you feel good, and if it doesn’t hurt anyone, then ain’t nothin wrong with it.
(8:41 PM) puppyprincess12: thank you sir :) do you have any other rules? ;)
(8:46 PM) texandaddy81: I certainly have a rule for respect and manners, you seem to follow that one all on your own. I’d also like to have some rules for taking care of yourself. Eating 3 square meals a day, drinking your water, having a bedtime…
(8:49 PM) puppyprincess12: id really like some rules like that :(( with school i can be bad at taking care of myself on my own
(8:51 PM) texandaddy81: I’d be more than happy to help you do that, sweetheart. Why don’t we try it out starting tonight, hm?
(8:53 PM) texandaddy81: How much have you had to eat today?
(8:55 PM) puppyprincess12: just lunch and a couple snacks, i haven’t had dinner yet… and i don’t usually eat breakfast…
(8:57 PM) texandaddy81: That’s alright princess. Getting pretty late though…
(8:58 PM) texandaddy81: Why don’t you go ahead and get yourself some dinner and send me a picture when you get it, okay?
(9:01 PM) puppyprincess12: okay sir :) i’ll be right back
(9:03 PM) texandaddy81: Good girl, thank you.
(9:16 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(9:17 PM) puppyprincess12: i went to the dining hall and got a chicken sandwich and some sweet potato fries :D
(9:21 PM) texandaddy81: That looks like a good dinner to me :) Can you drink a whole glass of water with it for me please?
(9:22 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i will :)
(9:23 PM) texandaddy81: Good girl.
(9:26 PM) puppyprincess12: :) i really like it when you call me that
(9:29 PM) texandaddy81: Well, that’s what you are. I’ll call you that all you want.
(9:33 PM) texandaddy81: Is there anything else you’d like me to call you?
(9:36 PM) puppyprincess12: um… well…
(9:38 PM) texandaddy81: What is it, babygirl? Use your words please.
(9:41 PM) puppyprincess12: i think i’d like it if you called me puppy sometimes :((
(9:44 PM) texandaddy81: I can certainly do that. Why don’t you be a good puppy and eat your dinner for me, drink your water too. Come back to me again when you’re all finished.
(9:45 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir :))
(10:16 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(10:17 PM) puppyprincess12: okay i’m all done here’s a picture of my empty plate and empty glass in case u wanted to see
(10:23 PM) texandaddy81: Thank you princess, that was very thoughtful of you to show me.
(10:25 PM) texandaddy81: All that’s left is my rule about bedtime. What time do you normally go to bed during the week?
(10:28 PM) puppyprincess12: pretty late :(( especially if i’m working on a big project. sometimes i don’t go to bed until it’s the next morning…
(10:31 PM) texandaddy81: Well that’s not very good at all. It’s already pretty late, assuming you’re in the same time zone as me.
(10:35 PM) puppyprincess12: i’m in austin tx so it’s a lil after 10:30 here :((
(10:38 PM) texandaddy81: As fate would have it, that’s where I am, too. Do you have any more work to do tonight, puppy?
(10:40 PM) puppyprincess12: nooo that’s why i decided to get online and message you bc im done with my work for the night
(10:44 PM) texandaddy81: Well, as glad as I am that we got to talk to each other tonight, I reckon it’s about time for this little girl to go to bed, don’t you think? I’d like to set a bedtime for 10:30 as long as we keep gettin to know each other. We missed the mark a little bit for tonight, but does that sound okay goin forward?
(10:46 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir :(( i just wish i could keep talking to you
(10:49 PM) texandaddy81: I do too, but I’ll still be here when you wake up.
(11:03 PM) texandaddy81: Sorry, I shouldn’t assume. If you wanna keep talking, I’ll be around tomorrow.
(11:12 PM) puppyprincess12: i would love to talk to you again tomorrow sir :)
(11:15 PM) texandaddy81: Alright, then. Goodnight princess, get some good sleep and we’ll pick up where we left off tomorrow.
(11:16 PM) puppyprincess12: goodnight sir :) <3
November 8, 2017
(7:31 AM) texandaddy81: Good morning, sweetheart. Hope you slept well.
(8:03 AM) texandaddy81: You have something to eat yet this morning?
(9:36 AM) texandaddy81: Princess?
(10:02 AM) puppyprincess12: omg good morning sir i’m sorry my only class today isn’t until the evening so i slept in :((
(10:04 AM) texandaddy81: That’s alright sweet girl. Happy to hear from you.
(10:06 AM) texandaddy81: Can you answer my question please?
(10:07 AM) puppyprincess12: it’s a lil late for breakfast do i still have to eat something?
(10:13 AM) texandaddy81: I would like you to, please. Even if it’s just a piece of toast to tide you over until lunch.
(10:16 AM) puppyprincess12: okie sir i will have some :)
(10:21 AM) puppyprincess12: can i have some coffee or do i have to drink water ?
(10:26 AM) texandaddy81: Hmm… One glass of water before your coffee, please.
(10:27 AM) texandaddy81: Thank you for askin
(10:29 AM) puppyprincess12: you’re welcome :)
(10:36 AM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(10:36 AM) puppyprincess12: here’s a pic of everything so u can see i made it :)
(10:38 AM) texandaddy81: You’re such a good little girl.
(10:40 AM) texandaddy81: Hold on a second tho…
(10:41 AM) texandaddy81: Thought you said you were gonna make some coffee?
(10:43 AM) puppyprincess12: yea it’s in the pic :) in the pink mug!!
(10:45 AM) texandaddy81: Sweetheart… that ain’t coffee.
(10:47 AM) puppyprincess12: what do u mean ?
(10:50 AM) texandaddy81: Coffee’s usually black in my house. What you made yourself might as well just be milk.
(10:51 AM) puppyprincess12: nuh uh it’s coffee!!! i use this vanilla oat milk creamer that i like :)
(10:53 AM) texandaddy81: They can make milk outta oats now??
(10:54 AM) puppyprincess12: lol yes sir!! it’s really yum u should try it
(10:57 AM) texandaddy81: Lol. No thank you.
(10:59 AM) puppyprincess12: whatever more for me then :D
(11:07 AM) texandaddy81: You eating your breakfast in addition to breakin my heart with your coffee choices?
(11:08 AM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i am :) i will show u empty plate and cups in a bit
(11:25 AM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(11:25 AM) puppyprincess12: see all done
(11:27 AM) texandaddy81: Good puppy, thank you.
(11:28 AM) puppyprincess12: :D
(11:36 AM) texandaddy81: So your only class today isn’t until the evenin you said? What time would that be?
(11:38 AM) puppyprincess12: it starts at 5pm :)
(11:42 AM) texandaddy81: Alright, babygirl. Got all the work done that you need to do for it?
(11:45 AM) puppyprincess12: yes sir it’s an art history class so i only had to do a little bit of reading last night :) i just have to show up and listen today
(11:49 AM) texandaddy81: And you’re a very good listener, aren’t you puppy?
(11:50 AM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i am :)
(12:03 PM) texandaddy81: Have you gotten yourself ready for the day yet? Or just rolled outta bed and ate something like I told you to?
(12:05 PM) puppyprincess12: no sir not ready yet
(12:07 PM) texandaddy81: Well then… Why don’t you get yourself dressed and do your hair up and everythin?
(12:08 PM) puppyprincess12: okay sir i will :)
(12:15 PM) puppyprincess12: um… sir?
(12:17 PM) texandaddy81: Right here princess. What is it?
(12:18 PM) puppyprincess12: would u like to pick out my outfit for me? maybe decide what i do with my hair too?
(12:21 PM) texandaddy81: I’d love to, sweet girl.
(12:23 PM) texandaddy81: What kinda stuff do you normally wear to class?
(12:25 PM) puppyprincess12: it’s been a little chilly lately so i’ve just been wearing sweaters and jeans
(12:27 PM) texandaddy81: Can you pick out a few sweaters that you like and send me a pic so I can choose one for you?
(12:28 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir :)
(12:31 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(12:33 PM) texandaddy81: Those are real cute… How about that rainbow one in the middle?
(12:34 PM) texandaddy81: I assume that’s the kind you gotta wear another shirt underneath, right?
(12:36 PM) texandaddy81: Correct me if I’m wrong. Don’t know too much about girls fashion lol.
(12:36 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir it’s a cardigan so i normally wear a white t shirt underneath it :)
(12:38 PM) texandaddy81: That’s fine, then.
(12:40 PM) texandaddy81: Can you show me a few pairs of your jeans then next?
(12:40 PM) texandaddy81: Put the sweater and the shirt in the same pic please.
(12:41 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir
(12:43 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(12:44 PM) texandaddy81: I think those lighter ones on the right would look nice.
(12:45 PM) puppyprincess12: okie :D i will wear those then
(12:46 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(12:46 PM) puppyprincess12: are these shoes okay to wear with it? i think they would look cute with the sweater :)
(12:49 PM) texandaddy81: I think they would too, princess. Those are real pretty.
(12:51 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(12:51 PM) puppyprincess12: and these earrings?
(12:59 PM) texandaddy81: Damn… can only imagine how fuckin adorable you’re gonna look today.
(1:00 PM) texandaddy81: Yes, you can wear those earrings.
(1:01 PM) puppyprincess12: okay thank you :)
(1:03 PM) puppyprincess12: so for my hair i usually leave it down and put some little clips in it or i can put it all up in a big claw clip or i can put it in 2 buns or 2 pigtails or whatever u want :)
(1:06 PM) texandaddy81: Wow, lotta choices…
(1:06 PM) texandaddy81: Not even gonna ask what the hell a claw clip is.
(1:07 PM) texandaddy81: Pigtails, please.
(1:08 PM) puppyprincess12: high or low?
(1:08 PM) texandaddy81: Low.
(1:09 PM) puppyprincess12: okay :)
(1:14 PM) puppyprincess12: i hope im not making u choose too many things i just wanna be good and look perfect for u
(1:21 PM) texandaddy81: You’ll look perfect no matter what, princess. But I certainly appreciate how eager you are to do as I say.
(1:22 PM) texandaddy81: Send me a pic when you’re all dressed and ready, please.
(1:23 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i will :)
(2:15 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(2:17 PM) texandaddy81: God almighty…
(2:18 PM) texandaddy81: You are a fuckin gorgeous little thing sweetheart.
(2:21 PM) texandaddy81: Know I’m a grown man and all but I’m starting to feel a lil jealous of all them college boys that are gonna get to see you today…
(2:23 PM) puppyprincess12: thank you sir :D <3
(2:24 PM) puppyprincess12: and don’t worry sir i don’t even look twice at the boys here none of them are as handsome or nice as you are
(2:27 PM) puppyprincess12: i already don’t talk to any of them but if u wanted me to i would never talk to any boys here ever again even if they’re in my class i would just ignore them
(2:27 PM) puppyprincess12: if that’s what u asked me to do
(2:31 PM) texandaddy81: You really would?
(2:33 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir
(2:33 PM) puppyprincess12: just wanna be good :((
(2:37 PM) texandaddy81: I’ll take you up on that then.
(2:40 PM) texandaddy81: If a guy in your class tonight tries to talk to you, I want you to ignore him. If you have to do somethin with a partner or whatever the hell they make you do in college, I want you to make sure you’re partnered with another girl.
(2:41 PM) texandaddy81: Only man you should be talkin to or payin attention to should be me.
(2:46 PM) texandaddy81: Sorry. Maybe that’s too much.
(2:48 PM) puppyprincess12: no sir that’s exactly what i want
(2:49 PM) puppyprincess12: i will do as u say i promise
(2:51 PM) texandaddy81: Good girl, thank you.
(2:59 PM) texandaddy81: Unfortunately I have to do some work for a lil bit babygirl. It’s mighty late in the day for you to be eating lunch but you slept in today so I’ll let it slide. Eat something while I’m gone and send me a pic, please.
(3:01 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i will :)
(3:27 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 2 images]
(3:27 PM) puppyprincess12: here’s what i had and proof that i ate it along with some water :)
(4:32 PM) puppyprincess12: i hope work is going well i miss u :(
(4:50 PM) puppyprincess12: hi sir i just wanted to let u know im going to class now and my professor doesn’t allow phones so i will text u again when im done :)
(7:49 PM) puppyprincess12: im sorry for so many texts just wanna make sure im keeping u updated :) class is over i did as you asked tonight and im back in my room now i have some dinner
(8:32 PM) texandaddy81: Shit sweetheart I’m so sorry. Didn’t expect to be gone for so long. The day just got away from me.
(8:36 PM) puppyprincess12: that’s okay sir i’m happy to hear from u again :) i hope work wasn’t too bad :((
(8:39 PM) texandaddy81: Just ended up runnin into some more problems today than we were expecting to.
(8:41 PM) texandaddy81: Worked up a pretty good sweat today so I just got outta the shower.
(8:45 PM) texandaddy81: Don’t suppose you’d like a pic?
(8:46 PM) puppyprincess12: omg yes please sir
(8:48 PM) texandaddy81: [Attachment: 1 image]
(8:50 PM) puppyprincess12: oh my god…
(8:51 PM) puppyprincess12: i’m on my knees rn you’re so fucking handsome…
(8:53 PM) puppyprincess12: ur arms are so big holy shit
(8:55 PM) texandaddy81: Lol thank you princess. You flatter me way too much.
(8:58 PM) puppyprincess12: may i pls see what’s under the towel? ;)
(9:01 PM) texandaddy81: Appreciate that you asked so politely. But maybe a little later, puppy.
(9:03 PM) puppyprincess12: okay sir :)
(9:05 PM) puppyprincess12: bet you’re just as big under there as the rest of you
(9:06 PM) texandaddy81: Maybe I am.
(9:08 PM) texandaddy81: But I decide when you get to see that. You understand?
(9:11 PM) texandaddy81: I decide when puppy gets her treat.
(9:12 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i understand
(9:23 PM) texandaddy81: I gotta admit somethin to you babygirl…
(9:24 PM) puppyprincess12: yes ?
(9:26 PM) texandaddy81: I was workin outside in the dirt and shit all afternoon… And all I could think about was some of what you said last night…
(9:27 PM) puppyprincess12: yeah? :)
(9:29 PM) texandaddy81: Yeah… Somethin about you wanting to be leashed and collared?
(9:30 PM) puppyprincess12: uh huh… i think about it a lot too :((
(9:32 PM) puppyprincess12: i actually do have a leash and collar but it doesn’t feel the same… want somebody else to put it on for me and tug on the leash and stuff…
(9:34 PM) puppyprincess12: want somebody to put me on all fours and treat me like a pet…
(9:35 PM) texandaddy81: And that somebody would be me, I reckon?
(9:37 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir… :((
(9:38 PM) texandaddy81: Well… can’t be there with you to do all that, but I can ask you to put your lil accessories on and send me a pic of you in em, can’t I?
(9:39 PM) puppyprincess12: yes u can sir
(9:39 PM) puppyprincess12: i will put them on rn
(9:46 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(9:47 PM) texandaddy81: Fuck… Just walked right outta one of my wet dreams, didn’t you?
(9:47 PM) texandaddy81: Most perfect lil puppy I’ve ever seen…
(9:48 PM) texandaddy81: Your collar got a lil tag on it, looks like? What’s it say, sweetheart?
(9:49 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(9:49 PM) puppyprincess12: it says princess :)
(9:51 PM) texandaddy81: I should’ve guessed. It’s fitting.
(9:53 PM) texandaddy81: Those cute lil pajamas are normally what you wear to bed?
(9:54 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i changed into them bc i know bedtime is soon :)
(9:56 PM) texandaddy81: Good girl.
(9:56 PM) texandaddy81: I won’t keep you up too much longer.
(9:58 PM) texandaddy81: Can you do one thing for me please, pretty girl?
(10:00 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir anything
(10:02 PM) texandaddy81: I wonder what it’d look like if you stuck your tongue out like a dog… Put up one of your hands so it looks like you’re beggin for me…
(10:08 PM) texandaddy81: Sorry. Unless that’s too much. Kind of a specific request.
(10:13 PM) texandaddy81: Didn’t mean to weird you out, sweetheart.
(10:15 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(10:15 PM) puppyprincess12: u mean like this?
(10:16 PM) texandaddy81: Fuck, princess. Yeah, just like that.
(10:17 PM) texandaddy81: Be dreamin about you lookin like that when I finally get some shuteye tonight for sure…
(10:17 PM) texandaddy81: Fuck you’re the most perfect lil thing got me nice n hard babygirl…
(10:19 PM) puppyprincess12: really? :)
(10:20 PM) texandaddy81: Yeah…
(10:22 PM) texandaddy81: You know what… Been so good for me today, I’ll give puppy a lil treat before she goes to bed.
(10:24 PM) texandaddy81: [Attachment: 1 image]
(10:24 PM) texandaddy81: That’s what you do to me, sweetheart.
(10:25 PM) puppyprincess12: fuckkk :(( thank u for showing me sir look so big even just gripping it through the towel like that
(10:26 PM) puppyprincess12: can’t wait to see the full thing whenever u allow me to
(10:27 PM) texandaddy81: Such a good, patient girl.
(10:28 PM) texandaddy81: Well, it’s just about your bedtime, ain’t it little one?
(10:28 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i’m under the covers already :)
(10:30 PM) texandaddy81: Goodnight then, princess. Talk to you again tomorrow.
(10:30 PM) puppyprincess12: goodnight sir talk to u tomorrow <3
November 9, 2017
(1:33 PM) puppyprincess12: good afternoon sir :) i’m sorry i didn’t message earlier i had classes from 8-10:30 and then from 11-1:30 today
(1:37 PM) texandaddy81: No worries, sweetheart. Was pretty preoccupied this morning myself.
(1:38 PM) texandaddy81: You’re a busy girl, ain’t you? Are your classes normally that long?
(1:39 PM) texandaddy81: I’m just curious, is all, wanna learn some more about you. I don’t mean to sound like I’m accusin you of anything.
(1:41 PM) puppyprincess12: it’s okay :) yeah i’m an art student so they’re all 2.5 hours long so we have enough time to get stuff done during class
(1:43 PM) texandaddy81: Wow… a ballerina and an artist, huh? I’m impressed. You must be very talented, princess.
(1:44 PM) puppyprincess12: idk i like to think so :) what did you go to college for sir?
(1:47 PM) texandaddy81: Didn’t quite make it that far, I’m afraid. But I ain’t doin so bad without it, my brother and I own a contracting business together.
(1:48 PM) puppyprincess12: oh that’s really cool!!! so you build houses and stuff??
(1:50 PM) texandaddy81: Pretty much.
(1:51 PM) puppyprincess12: ohhhh that must be why your arms are so big cause you’re building and lifting heavy things all the time
(1:55 PM) puppyprincess12: i bet you’re really strong huh ;)
(2:06 PM) texandaddy81: I suppose I am. Could probably pick you up and throw you over my shoulder no problem if I had to.
(2:12 PM) texandaddy81: Sorry. Too much?
(2:14 PM) puppyprincess12: noooo not at all… just got a little dizzy thinking about it is all
(2:16 PM) texandaddy81: Lol. Speaking of which… how are we doin on our meals and water today, puppy?
(2:18 PM) puppyprincess12: pretty good i did eat something before my morning class and im getting myself some lunch rn :) i’ll have some water with it i promise
(2:19 PM) texandaddy81: That’s a good girl.
(2:26 PM) puppyprincess12: :) so what are you up to today sir? building any houses?
(2:30 PM) texandaddy81: Not today, no. If I’m being honest, I was spending a lotta time staring at the pictures on your profile again this morning when I shoulda been paying attention to the meetings I was in.
(2:31 PM) puppyprincess12: oh u were? ;)
(2:33 PM) texandaddy81: I was. Some of em were givin me quite the ideas… You wanna hear some of them?
(2:33 PM) puppyprincess12: yes please sir
(2:35 PM) texandaddy81: Well… I was lookin at that pretty picture of you standing in front of your mirror… you know the one I’m talkin about?
(2:37 PM) puppyprincess12: i think so… the one where i have my puppy ears on?
(2:39 PM) texandaddy81: That’d be the one. Look so pretty in them… Had me thinkin about how you’d look even prettier if you were on your knees for me while you were wearin em… With your lil leash and collar on too…
(2:41 PM) texandaddy81: Let me know if I’m going too far…
(2:42 PM) puppyprincess12: not too far sir… i’d kneel for you right away if you asked me to, i’d be so good…
(2:43 PM) texandaddy81: I know you would be. Bet if I asked you to sit, stay, roll over, bark… You would, wouldn’t you?
(2:44 PM) puppyprincess12: uh huh yes sir i would i’d be such a good puppy for you i’d do anything you asked me to do
(2:46 PM) texandaddy81: Anything? Tell me this, princess. And again let me know if I’m going too far…
(2:48 PM) texandaddy81: Would you be willing to embarrass yourself for me, puppy? Would you let me degrade you if I wanted to?
(2:48 PM) puppyprincess12: yesss sir i would fuck i love being degraded :((
(2:49 PM) texandaddy81: Thought you might. Do I have permission to degrade you a little bit now?
(2:49 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir pls pls pls i want you to :((
(2:51 PM) texandaddy81: God… you’re a good girl but you can be a little pathetic, huh? Begging a man you’ve never met to degrade you…
(2:52 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir im pathetic fuck i want u to be mean to me
(2:56 PM) puppyprincess12: pls keep talking to me like that sir i’m so wet already :((
(2:57 PM) texandaddy81: Can I see, babygirl? Will you send me a picture of that little puppy pussy drippin for me?
(3:02 PM) texandaddy81: If you’re comfortable with that.
(3:10 PM) texandaddy81: Fuck, if you’re not in public right now or anything.
(3:16 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(3:16 PM) puppyprincess12: sorry sir i ran back to my dorm as quick as i could so i could take a pic
(3:17 PM) texandaddy81: Christ you’ve got a perfect little cunt… blushing and bare and droolin for me…
(3:18 PM) texandaddy81: She don’t need much, does she?
(3:19 PM) puppyprincess12: no sir i get wet soooo easily just from you saying this kinda stuff to me :((
(3:19 PM) texandaddy81: Your roommates home sweetheart?
(3:21 PM) puppyprincess12: um no sir
(3:22 PM) texandaddy81: Good. I want you to touch yourself for me.
(3:25 PM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i’m doing it it feels so good
(3:25 PM) puppyprincess12: i bet your big strong fingers would feel even better than my little paws :((
(3:32 PM) puppyprincess12: sorry was that weird :((
(3:36 PM) texandaddy81: Fuck… no puppy it wasn’t. Just had to situate myself so I could jerk off right alongside you. Goddamn that beautiful wet little pussy so fuckin sexy…
(3:36 PM) texandaddy81: Would you like a picture of Daddy’s dick sweet girl?
(3:37 PM) puppyprincess12: fuckkk yes please… sir…
(3:38 PM) texandaddy81: I went ahead and used it so you can say it now puppy.
(3:39 PM) texandaddy81: Probably should wait a little longer but fuck it it’s been long enough
(3:39 PM) texandaddy81: There’s just somethin about you princess
(3:40 PM) puppyprincess12: pls daddy let me see it please :((
(3:42 PM) texandaddy81: [Attachment: 1 image]
(3:43 PM) puppyprincess12: ohh my god you’re so fucking big daddy fuck
(3:43 PM) puppyprincess12: i knew u would be big but holy fuck
(3:44 PM) puppyprincess12: probably wouldn’t even fit inside me :((
(3:46 PM) texandaddy81: That’s okay princess I bet you’d be beggin me to make it fit huh? Pathetic little puppy slut.
(3:47 PM) puppyprincess12: yes daddy want u to stretch me open
(3:47 PM) puppyprincess12: idc if it hurts a little i want it daddy :((
(3:49 PM) texandaddy81: Might hurt more than just a little. But I’d talk you through it and help you take it all.
(3:50 PM) texandaddy81: I’d tug on your leash while I split open that tight little puppy hole
(3:50 PM) texandaddy81: Make sure my pretty mutt keeps her eyes on her Daddy while he shoves his big cock deep in her guts.
(3:51 PM) texandaddy81: You like the sound of that sweetheart?
(3:52 PM) puppyprincess12: FUCK yes pls daddy i want it so fucking bad
(3:55 PM) puppyprincess12: fuck i’m so close already daddy pls keep going pls pls pls
(3:56 PM) texandaddy81: Fuck I’m gonna blow my fuckin load just thinking about all those sounds I bet you’re makin right now… The whines and whimpers you’d make when I use your pretty cunt like a toy…
(3:58 PM) texandaddy81: God I’m usually not this fuckin forward sweetheart I promise but Jesus Christ…
(3:59 PM) puppyprincess12: oh my fucking god daddy fuck fuck fuck pls that’s what i want omggg
(3:59 PM) puppyprincess12: i don’t care daddy it’s turning me on so fucking much im so fucking wet for you
(4:01 PM) texandaddy81: Such a fucking little whore gonna soak your little paws and your bedsheets just from thinkin about me huh
(4:02 PM) puppyprincess12: fuck yes daddy i’m gonna come can i please??
(4:02 PM) texandaddy81: Course you can princess askin so pretty and nice
(4:03 PM) texandaddy81: You wanna see this Daddy dick comin for you?
(4:03 PM) puppyprincess12: yes pls daddy don’t wanna come until you do :((
(4:03 PM) texandaddy81: Fuck such a good little girl
(4:05 PM) texandaddy81: Daddy’s comin so fuckin hard for you puppy wish I was fuckin that desperate lil hole of yours instead of my fist
(4:07 PM) texandaddy81: [Attachment: 1 video]
(4:14 PM) texandaddy81: Still there princess?
(4:15 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(4:15 PM) puppyprincess12: uh huh… i made such a mess daddy look :((
(4:17 PM) texandaddy81: God damn… that’s okay puppy. Couldn’t help yourself, could you?
(4:17 PM) puppyprincess12: no daddy :((
(4:19 PM) texandaddy81: Messy little girl… Maybe next time Daddy’ll be there to help you clean it up.
(4:19 PM) puppyprincess12: maybe :) <3
(4:21 PM) texandaddy81: Would you like that, sweetheart?
(4:27 PM) texandaddy81: That wasn’t too much too soon, was it? Like I said I normally wouldn’t move that fast but there’s just somethin about you…
(4:28 PM) puppyprincess12: no daddy it wasn’t :) i liked it a lot it felt rly good
(4:30 PM) puppyprincess12: thank u for going along with the puppy thing lol
(4:31 PM) texandaddy81: If it makes you feel that good then who am I to deny you, sweetheart? You remember my rule I told you about right?
(4:31 PM) puppyprincess12: yes daddy i do :)
(4:33 PM) texandaddy81: Good girl.
(4:35 PM) texandaddy81: Well I should probably clean myself up and finish this email I was in the middle of writing.
(4:36 PM) puppyprincess12: okay daddy :((
(4:38 PM) texandaddy81: I know puppy. Just gotta hunker down on some work this evenin and I’ll check back in with you a little later, alright? Not as late as last time I promise, I’m just doing boring computer stuff today.
(4:42 PM) texandaddy81: While I’m gone you can think about if you’d like to get some dinner with me this weekend?
(4:45 PM) texandaddy81: Only if you want to. And if you’re not too busy. Would just love to see that pretty face in person.
(4:46 PM) texandaddy81: And prove to you that I can be a gentleman, too.
(4:48 PM) puppyprincess12: i would love to :)
(4:49 PM) texandaddy81: Well alright then :) Speak soon, alright princess? Be good.
(4:49 PM) puppyprincess12: i will daddy :)
(4:50 PM) texandaddy81: Good girl.
(4:51 PM) texandaddy81: Thank you for the good time.
(4:51 PM) texandaddy81: Like I said I promise I don’t normally do that much that fast.
(4:53 PM) puppyprincess12: it’s really okay i promise :) i had fun and i wouldn’t be on this site if i wasn’t looking for something like that
(4:55 PM) texandaddy81: You’re right. Just wanna make sure I’m doin all this the right way
(4:56 PM) texandaddy81: My first time gettin into this kinda thing and all
(4:57 PM) puppyprincess12: we’re both learning :) isn’t that what you said the other day?
(5:01 PM) texandaddy81: Just the other day, huh? You’re right sweetheart.
(5:02 PM) puppyprincess12: i can tell you’re sweet and that you have good intentions and i can’t wait to meet you soon :D
(5:03 PM) texandaddy81: Well thank you babygirl, I appreciate you sayin that a lot.
(5:03 PM) texandaddy81: And I can’t wait either princess.
(5:05 PM) puppyprincess12: i’m gonna do my homework for a few hours text me when ur done working okay?
(5:06 PM) texandaddy81: Will do, puppy.
(6:12 PM) texandaddy81: Hi again, pretty girl. You still workin?
(6:45 PM) texandaddy81: Gettin pretty close to dinner time, I hope you get yourself something to eat soon.
(8:01 PM) texandaddy81: Just checking in, princess. You there?
(9:19 PM) puppyprincess12: hiiii
(9:21 PM) texandaddy81: :) There she is.
(9:22 PM) texandaddy81: Were you doin homework all that time?
(9:24 PM) puppyprincess12: yeah :(( i’m still not done
(9:26 PM) texandaddy81: That’s okay, sweetheart. You took a break somewhere in there though to eat some dinner I hope?
(9:27 PM) puppyprincess12: …noooo :(((
(9:27 PM) puppyprincess12: pls don’t be mad at me
(9:28 PM) texandaddy81: I’m not mad at you, princess.
(9:29 PM) texandaddy81: Nearly 9:30 though, you gotta be starvin by now.
(9:29 PM) texandaddy81: I’d like you to take a break for me please, little girl.
(9:31 PM) puppyprincess12: can i take my break in just a few more minutes sir?
(9:32 PM) puppyprincess12: i just don’t feel like i can stop until i fix this one part of the project that im working on
(9:32 PM) puppyprincess12: once i fix it and feel good about it then i can stop
(9:36 PM) texandaddy81: That’s not how this works, sweetheart. You follow Daddy’s rules and do as he asks like a good girl. No arguing, not when he’s trying to get you to take care of yourself. That’s what you wanted me to help you do, remember?
(9:37 PM) puppyprincess12: yes daddy i remember
(9:39 PM) puppyprincess12: i’ll take a break now
(9:41 PM) texandaddy81: Thank you puppy.
(9:55 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 2 images]
(9:55 PM) puppyprincess12: here u go here’s proof
(9:57 PM) puppyprincess12: can i go back to work now
(9:59 PM) texandaddy81: Not yet. Don’t appreciate the attitude I’m getting through your last couple of messages.
(9:59 PM) puppyprincess12: :(( i’m sorry daddy i’m not trying to give u attitude im just rly stressed about my project
(10:01 PM) texandaddy81: What about it’s got you so stressed, princess?
(10:02 PM) puppyprincess12: its due tomorrow morning and i just feel like it doesn’t look that good and like something is missing but idk what it is
(10:02 PM) puppyprincess12: i always do rly well in this class and i get perfect grades and good critiques all the time and i don’t want everyone to be disappointed in me if i present something that’s not my best
(10:04 PM) puppyprincess12: don’t want u to be disappointed in me…
(10:05 PM) puppyprincess12: i just need it to be perfect
(10:05 PM) texandaddy81: I would NOT be disappointed in you.
(10:07 PM) texandaddy81: It doesn’t need to be perfect, sweetheart. If you’ve done your best then that’s what matters. I don’t want you to push yourself and not take care of yourself over one project.
(10:08 PM) texandaddy81: Almost puppy’s bedtime, anyway. Take this last bit of time to do what you can and then get some rest, please.
(10:08 PM) puppyprincess12: okayyyyy
(10:09 PM) texandaddy81: Try again.
(10:09 PM) puppyprincess12: sorry :((
(10:09 PM) puppyprincess12: i mean yes daddy
(10:11 PM) texandaddy81: Much better. Thank you, princess.
(10:11 PM) puppyprincess12: :)
(10:32 PM) puppyprincess12: okie i’m in bed now goodnight daddy <3
(10:33 PM) texandaddy81: Goodnight, little one.
November 10, 2017
(9:15 AM) puppyprincess12: hiiiiii daddy good morning guess what :D
(9:19 AM) texandaddy81: Good morning, princess.
(9:19 AM) texandaddy81: What?
(9:20 AM) puppyprincess12: nooooo u have to guess
(9:20 AM) texandaddy81: I do?
(9:21 AM) texandaddy81: Hmm…
(9:24 AM) texandaddy81: A witch turned you into a real puppy this mornin and you’re typing this to me using your furry little paws?
(9:25 AM) puppyprincess12: lol noooo daddy guess again
(9:27 AM) texandaddy81: You finally tried your coffee black and discovered that it’s better without any of your oat milk whatever?
(9:28 AM) puppyprincess12: :| no and that’s never gonna happen sorry daddy
(9:29 AM) puppyprincess12: okay 1 more guess
(9:31 AM) texandaddy81: All I can do is try
(9:33 AM) texandaddy81: Don’t suppose it has something to do with your project that was due this mornin?
(9:34 AM) puppyprincess12: yes it does :D
(9:35 AM) puppyprincess12: everybody loved it and my professor gave me rly good compliments on it!!!!
(9:35 AM) puppyprincess12: so i think im gonna get a good grade
(9:42 AM) texandaddy81: That’s amazing, sweetheart! Daddy is very proud of you. You’re such a talented little girl.
(9:42 AM) puppyprincess12: thank you daddy!!!!! :)
(9:44 AM) texandaddy81: But you know I would’ve been proud of you no matter how it went this morning, don’t you?
(9:45 AM) puppyprincess12: yes sir i do :)
(9:45 AM) texandaddy81: Good.
(9:52 AM) texandaddy81: Got any plans for the rest of the day?
(10:11 AM) puppyprincess12: well usually when i have a good day in class i get myself an iced coffee as a treat
(10:13 AM) puppyprincess12: do i have your permission to get myself one sir?
(10:15 AM) texandaddy81: Yes you do, puppy. Thank you for asking.
(10:16 AM) texandaddy81: I don’t need a picture of it this time, though. Can only imagine what kinda nonsense you’re gonna have that poor barista dump in it for ya.
(10:19 AM) puppyprincess12: the nonsense is called french vanilla syrup
(10:21 AM) texandaddy81: That don’t even sound natural.
(10:22 AM) puppyprincess12: it’s not. but it’s yummy and makes it really sweet the way i like it :D
(10:23 AM) texandaddy81: Sweet little drink for a sweet little girl.
(10:23 AM) puppyprincess12: yea :)
(10:26 AM) texandaddy81: You typically order sweet little drinks of the alcoholic variety, too?
(10:28 AM) texandaddy81: Just tryin to steel myself for whatever might land at our table when we go out this weekend.
(10:28 AM) puppyprincess12: lol yes i do :)
(10:29 AM) puppyprincess12: i usually order whatever fruity cocktail they have that sounds good and if they don’t have anything i want then i get a sweet white wine
(10:31 AM) puppyprincess12: sometimes i get a cosmo but if it’s not on the menu usually im too shy to order it myself :((
(10:33 AM) texandaddy81: Well, you won’t have to worry about that, sweetheart. Daddy will order for you.
(10:34 AM) texandaddy81: If you’d like me to. I don’t want to assume.
(10:36 AM) puppyprincess12: yes please i would love that :)
(10:37 AM) texandaddy81: That’s what I’ll do then, princess.
(10:37 AM) puppyprincess12: okie <3
(10:41 AM) puppyprincess12: where do u think we’ll go on our date?
(10:43 AM) texandaddy81: Was thinkin Perry’s downtown maybe?
(10:44 AM) texandaddy81: Pick you up around 7 tomorrow night?
(10:46 AM) puppyprincess12: perry’s??????
(10:46 AM) puppyprincess12: are you sure daddy isn’t that place super fancy and expensive??
(10:49 AM) texandaddy81: You sayin you don’t wanna go?
(10:51 AM) puppyprincess12: noooo of course not i just don’t want you to spend a bunch of money on me
(10:53 AM) texandaddy81: It’s up to me what I do with my money, sweetheart.
(10:54 AM) texandaddy81: You’re a hardworking, talented, beautiful girl, and I think you deserve to be spoiled for a night.
(10:56 AM) texandaddy81: Deserve to be spoiled for the rest of your life, really.
(10:57 AM) puppyprincess12: okay as long as you’re sure daddy thank you so much :((
(10:58 AM) texandaddy81: I’m sure, puppy.
(11:00 AM) puppyprincess12: okie :D
(11:07 AM) puppyprincess12: what would u wanna do after we have dinner?
(11:09 AM) texandaddy81: Probably just be a gentleman and take you back to campus for the rest of the evenin.
(11:10 AM) puppyprincess12: oh :((
(11:12 AM) texandaddy81: Why're you frowning at me, princess?
(11:15 AM) texandaddy81: You have somethin else in mind?
(11:16 AM) puppyprincess12: maybe…
(11:17 AM) texandaddy81: Yeah? And what would that be?
(11:17 AM) puppyprincess12: i dunno…
(11:19 AM) texandaddy81: Speak, puppy.
(11:20 AM) puppyprincess12: well remember what u were saying last night?
(11:22 AM) puppyprincess12: about making it fit and stuff…
(11:23 AM) texandaddy81: I remember, babygirl.
(11:23 AM) puppyprincess12: maybe we could… do that…
(11:25 AM) texandaddy81: Yeah? Want Daddy to wine and dine you and then split you open on his cock?
(11:26 AM) puppyprincess12: uh huh yeah please daddy :((
(11:26 AM) puppyprincess12: haven’t stopped thinking about ur cock since last night i wanna feel it inside me so bad
(11:28 AM) texandaddy81: Eager little whore.
(11:30 AM) texandaddy81: What if Daddy wanted to have some dessert first? Would you let him?
(11:30 AM) puppyprincess12: of course daddy whatever u want
(11:31 AM) texandaddy81: Could he eat that sweet lil cunt of yours for dessert?
(11:32 AM) puppyprincess12: fuckkkk yes u can daddy
(11:34 AM) texandaddy81: Are you wet again, princess?
(11:35 AM) puppyprincess12: …yes :((
(11:36 AM) texandaddy81: Course you are.
(11:36 AM) texandaddy81: Show me.
(11:39 AM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(11:41 AM) texandaddy81: God damn…
(11:43 AM) texandaddy81: I’d suck on that swollen little clit like a piece of candy, sweetheart.
(11:43 AM) texandaddy81: If you’d let me.
(11:44 AM) puppyprincess12: yes daddy u can do whatever u want to me
(11:46 AM) puppyprincess12: tell me what else u wanna do to me pls daddy
(11:47 AM) texandaddy81: God I bet that little princess pussy you got tastes so fucking sweet… Bet she’s so sensitive, too.
(11:49 AM) texandaddy81: Tell me something, pretty girl.
(11:49 AM) puppyprincess12: yes daddy anything
(11:52 AM) texandaddy81: Would you let me get a little rough with you if I wanted to?
(11:53 AM) texandaddy81: I know you’re a sweet little girl but somethins tellin me you’d let Daddy spank that leaky little puppy hole red if he wanted to.
(11:53 AM) puppyprincess12: FUCK daddy yes i want it
(11:54 AM) puppyprincess12: bully my little princess cunt make her cry pls pls pls :((
(11:56 AM) texandaddy81: Jesus fuckin Christ gonna have to pull my fucking dick out on the job right now
(11:58 AM) texandaddy81: Just drive me so fuckin crazy puppy can’t stop thinking about you
(11:58 AM) texandaddy81: Every night after you go to sleep I just look back thru your pics and our messages and jerk myself off again I can’t help it you’re just exactly what I’ve been lookin for babygirl
(11:59 AM) puppyprincess12: fuckkkk daddy that’s so fucking hot
(12:01 PM) puppyprincess12: u don’t understand daddy i would literally let u treat me like a fucking dog i don’t care i want it so bad i would let u do whatever u want to me
(12:02 PM) texandaddy81: Yeah? Little bitch in heat, huh?
(12:02 PM) texandaddy81: You wanna be Daddy’s bitch?
(12:03 PM) puppyprincess12: YES DADDY fuck fuck fuck pleaseeeeee
(12:04 PM) texandaddy81: Better not be fuckin touchin yourself right now doggy
(12:05 PM) texandaddy81: Daddy didn’t say you could
(12:05 PM) texandaddy81: Paws off.
(12:06 PM) puppyprincess12: “doggy” holy fuckkkkkkkkk
(12:06 PM) puppyprincess12: i’m not touching i promise
(12:07 PM) puppyprincess12: but im so fucking wet and it hurts daddy may i pls use a pillow or something :((
(12:08 PM) texandaddy81: You like that one? Thought you might.
(12:09 PM) texandaddy81: God what a fucking sight that would be… Desperate puppy rubbin her soaking wet little cunt on a pillow for me…
(12:10 PM) texandaddy81: But no pillow.
(12:10 PM) texandaddy81: You get to use one of your stuffed animals or you get nothing.
(12:11 PM) puppyprincess12: fuckkk okay daddy
(12:15 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(12:16 PM) puppyprincess12: his fur is getting soooo wet :(( but it feels so good thank you for letting me use him
(12:17 PM) texandaddy81: God you really just do anything I ask huh such a fucking perfect submissive little bitch
(12:18 PM) texandaddy81: Fucking gorgeous little slut you just get prettier every time I see you baby
(12:18 PM) texandaddy81: Back arched so fucking pretty for me God you’re gonna be fun to play with
(12:19 PM) puppyprincess12: yes daddy wanna be a good little bitch for u
(12:20 PM) puppyprincess12: u can eat my pussy spit on it spank it put tape over it i don’t fucking care i want u to own it
(12:20 PM) texandaddy81: Fucking right I can
(12:21 PM) texandaddy81: Jesus Christ you’re pathetic
(12:22 PM) texandaddy81: Show me those pretty tits baby wanna see a lil more of you before I cum all over my fist
(12:22 PM) texandaddy81: God fuckin jerking my dick in one of those filthy porta johns they got on this site don’t even fucking care
(12:25 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(12:25 PM) puppyprincess12: im a little insecure about them but here u go daddy
(12:26 PM) texandaddy81: Fuckkkk sweetheart you got any body part that isn’t fucking perfect??
(12:27 PM) texandaddy81: Those tiny tits that bare lil pussy Jesus fucking Christ babygirl…
(12:27 PM) texandaddy81: Bitty lil things you got bet I could squeeze both of em in one hand.
(12:28 PM) puppyprincess12: so u like them? dont think they’re too small? :((
(12:28 PM) texandaddy81: Course not puppy they’re gorgeous just like the rest of you
(12:29 PM) texandaddy81: God imagining those little titties bouncing for me when I’m poundin that sweet baby cunt so fucking pretty babygirl
(12:31 PM) texandaddy81: Gonna fuckin cum princess are you close?
(12:31 PM) puppyprincess12: uh huh daddy i’ve been close this whole time just waiting for u to give me permission :((
(12:32 PM) texandaddy81: That’s a good girl
(12:33 PM) texandaddy81: Come for Daddy and send me a video of that swollen lil doggy hole gushin for me
(12:33 PM) puppyprincess12: i will thank u daddy thank u
(12:37 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 video]
(12:39 PM) texandaddy81: Fuck… even sound just like a little puppy when you come, don’t you?
(12:39 PM) texandaddy81: Whimperin and begging in that sweet lil voice…
(12:40 PM) texandaddy81: Can’t wait to hear those pathetic lil sounds in person.
(12:42 PM) texandaddy81: Speakin of which…
(12:43 PM) puppyprincess12: yeah ?
(12:44 PM) texandaddy81: Kinda wanna see you tonight if that’s okay… I just don’t know if I can wait any longer to meet you, babygirl.
(12:46 PM) texandaddy81: But if it’s still too soon for you or if you’re busy tonight or somethin I understand
(12:47 PM) puppyprincess12: no i would love to meet u tonight daddy :)
(12:49 PM) texandaddy81: Alright :) I’ll go ahead and make the reservation for 7:15 tonight, okay sweetheart?
(12:53 PM) texandaddy81: I’m assumin you’re at UT Austin… am I right?
(12:54 PM) puppyprincess12: yea :)
(12:56 PM) texandaddy81: I won’t make you tell me exactly where you live or nothin if that would make you uncomfortable… but I sure as hell know where that football stadium is… Wanna meet me there at 7?
(12:58 PM) texandaddy81: I drive a blue pickup with a big white stripe on the side, should be pretty easy to spot
(12:59 PM) puppyprincess12: okie sounds good :)
(1:03 PM) texandaddy81: Is there anythin else I can do that would make you more comfortable meeting up with me? Can give you my phone number if you want…
(1:05 PM) texandaddy81: You can go right ahead and give my picture to one of your roommates so they know who you’ll be with and everythin
(1:06 PM) puppyprincess12: well…
(1:06 PM) puppyprincess12: might be nice to know ur name :)
(1:08 PM) texandaddy81: You’re right, sweetheart. Not sure why I didn’t think of that one sooner.
(1:09 PM) texandaddy81: My name’s Joel
(1:11 PM) puppyprincess12: ohhhh joel <3 that’s a nice name :)
(1:13 PM) texandaddy81: Thank you kindly
(1:13 PM) texandaddy81: Still Daddy to you though as far as you’re concerned though, yeah? ;)
(1:15 PM) puppyprincess12: of course daddy :)
(1:17 PM) texandaddy81: Alright, I’ll see you tonight then, sweet girl
(1:18 PM) texandaddy81: I better get back to work now, princess. But lemme just say one more thing.
(1:25 PM) texandaddy81: I know I’ve been doin a godawful job of showing you that I really am a gentleman. My mama raised me right, I swear she did, and I plan on provin it to you tonight. I just wanna let you know that if we finish up our dinner and you decide that you really do just want me to take you back to campus afterwards, then that’s what I’ll do. I know I’m the dominant one here, but all I want is for you to feel in control and safe and I’ll do my damndest to help you feel that way. So if you end up feelin like you ain’t really up to making our messages a reality at the end of the night, then that’s fine with me, sweetheart. I ain’t in the business of putting pressure on a girl to do anything beyond what she really wants to do. I just want you to know that before we meet.
(1:27 PM) puppyprincess12: dadddyyyyy :(( <3
(1:28 PM) puppyprincess12: that’s really really sweet of you i appreciate it a lot thank u
(1:28 PM) puppyprincess12: i can’t wait to see u tonight i’m soooo excited
(1:31 PM) puppyprincess12: i know u have to go now but can i send u pics of a couple outfits and u can decide which one i wear when u get a chance ?
(1:33 PM) texandaddy81: Of course I can, sweetheart. Send em on over along with pics of your lunch, please.
(1:34 PM) texandaddy81: Be good, talk to you again soon, puppy
(1:34 PM) puppyprincess12: i will :)
(1:47 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(1:47 PM) puppyprincess12: here is lunch and my water i made a grilled cheese
(2:01 PM) puppyprincess12: [Attachment: 1 image]
(2:02 PM) puppyprincess12: and here are my outfits let me know which one u like best daddy :)
(6:13 PM) texandaddy81: Wow… I think you’d look gorgeous in all of em but that pretty red dress is really speakin to me
(6:15 PM) puppyprincess12: yay i love that dress i was hoping u would pick that one :)
(6:16 PM) puppyprincess12: i have my hair and makeup done and everything i just need to get dressed and then i’ll be ready
(6:20 PM) texandaddy81: Alright sweetheart, no rush. I just got home myself so gimme a little bit to clean up nice and I’ll let you know when I’m headin over, alright?
(6:21 PM) puppyprincess12: alright daddy :)
(6:50 PM) texandaddy81: Gettin in the truck now, see you in a little bit, princess
(6:51 PM) puppyprincess12: okay i’m walking over to the stadium now!!!
(7:00 PM) texandaddy81: Just pulled up across from the library
(7:00 PM) texandaddy81: That you across the street? Pretty girl with the red dress and black purse?
(7:01 PM) puppyprincess12: omg yes i see you hi daddy!!!!!!
(7:01 PM) puppyprincess12: i’m coming now
(7:02 PM) texandaddy81: Careful crossing the street babygirl.
(11:36 PM) texandaddy81: I know I just dropped you off but God I gotta see you again
(11:37 PM) texandaddy81: Gotta sound like a broken record by now but Lord you are just so beautiful, princess. Even prettier and sweeter and more perfect in person. Just feel like I won the damn lottery meeting you on here.
(11:41 PM) texandaddy81: Anyway. Thank you for spending your evenin with me
(11:45 PM) puppyprincess12: aweee thank u daddy :(( you are so handsome i kept having to remember to focus on what u were saying to me at dinner bc i was just staring at you
(11:45 PM) puppyprincess12: thank you soooo much for dinner daddy and for the amazing time afterwards ;)
(11:47 PM) puppyprincess12: u made me feel so fucking good i’m gonna be thinking about it all weekend
(11:48 PM) texandaddy81: You’re much too sweet, princess
(11:49 PM) texandaddy81: And you’re welcome, sweet girl. For both. ;)
(11:51 PM) texandaddy81: Apologies ahead of time if you’re still sore in the mornin…
(11:53 PM) puppyprincess12: lol it’s okie i asked for it
(11:55 PM) texandaddy81: Begged for it, more like. Didn’t you, doggy?
(11:56 PM) puppyprincess12: yes daddy :((
(11:56 PM) puppyprincess12: fuck dont call me that im gonna get wet again :((
(11:58 PM) texandaddy81: Sorry, sweetheart. It’s just too easy…
(11:58 PM) texandaddy81: Knew you were gonna be fun to play with.
(12:03 AM) texandaddy81: But I’ll stop. Not because you told me to, just so she don’t get all worked up again. Both of you worked plenty hard for me tonight, you and her should get some rest, puppy.
(12:09 AM) texandaddy81: But whaddya say? Can we keep doin this?
(12:14 AM) puppyprincess12: yes please daddy :)
(12:15 AM) texandaddy81: Alright :)
(12:17 AM) texandaddy81: I know I kept you out a good bit past your bedtime, I hope you’ve been getting yourself ready for bed while we’ve been talkin
(12:19 AM) puppyprincess12: uh huh i have been :) just gotta change into my pjs then i’m ready
(12:23 AM) puppyprincess12: okie i’m in bed now
(12:24 AM) puppyprincess12: thank u so much again for everything daddy i had a rly good time <3
(12:26 AM) texandaddy81: I did too :)
(12:27 AM) texandaddy81: Goodnight, babygirl. Talk to you again tomorrow.
(12:29 AM) texandaddy81: Maybe we can talk about what we’re gonna do next time around ;)
(12:29 AM) texandaddy81: Start dreamin up some ideas for me tonight okay?
(12:30 AM) puppyprincess12: okay daddy i will :D goodnight <3
profile edits made by @polaroidpascal
tag list: @beefrobeefcal @iamasaddie @rebel-heldd @dilfgestivo @joeldjarin @kamcrazy123 @hellowoolf @rexamongthestars @stevie75 @luxurychristmaspudding @noisynightmarepoetry @mewantpeepaw @pedritoferg @alex-does-art-things @evolnoomym @annoyingmarvelreader @joelsdagger @natalieispunk @mermaidgirl30 @untamedheart81 @galway-girlatwork @pinkiec6-rubi @wand-erer5 @arminsbf @shivispunk @gigistorm @theoreticalfreak @vinceelser @zliteraturehoe @k1l4ni @hjzghi-blog @xkyxkyxxlylcylulucuflfluclu (if your name is crossed out, it won’t let me tag you!!)
#my writing#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x you#the last of us fanfiction#tlou fanfiction#daddy!joel miller#joel miller smut
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FALLING OUT OF FRAME | Part 5
pairing: you x drew starkey
The photos were everywhere.
Drew stared at his phone, his thumb hovering over the screen as he scrolled through the dozens of articles plastered with pictures of Y/N, her face streaked with tears, walking alone under the dim glow of the streetlights. The headlines weren’t just cruel – they were brutal: “Heartbreak in Hollywood: Drew Starkey’s Ex Caught in Emotional Turmoil.”
He clenched his jaw, tossing the phone onto the couch. The guilt twisted like a vice in his chest. He couldn’t stop seeing her face in those photos, couldn’t stop hearing the pain in her voice during their last fight.
The late-night outings, the photos ops with Odessa – it all felt so hollow now. Odessa wasn’t to blame: she was a good person stuck in the same web of expectations he had willingly stepped into. But as the PR machine churned on, Drew began to feel like a puppet in his own life, with every decision dictated by what would look good in a headline or keep his career safe. And the worst part? He had let it cost him the one person who had ever made him feel truly grounded.
That night, Drew couldn’t sleep. His mind raced with memories of Y/N – the way she laughed, the way she always knew when he needed to be pulled out of his own head, the way she had looked at him like he was her whole world.
He pulled out his phone and scrolled through their old text messages. Her words stared back at him, filled with love and trust, and he felt the weight of his mistakes even more. How had he let this happen? How had he let her slip through his fingers?
The PR relationship with Odessa had started as a way to deflect attention from his personal life. At first, it seemed harmless – a mutually beneficial arrangement to keep the press off their back. But somewhere along the way, it had spiraled out of control. Every staged photo, every “leak” had chipped away at his relationship with Y/N, and now it was just gone.
He hated himself for it.
Over the next few day, Drew had tried to reach out to her.
He sent texts:
“I need to talk to you. Please.”
“I’m sorry for everything. I miss you.”
“Can I see you? Just once.”
He left voicemails, his voice thick with emotion: “Y/N, I know I don’t deserve it, but I need you to hear me out. I messed up, and I don’t even know how to fix this. But I can’t stop thinking about you. About us. Please, just… call me back.”
When none of that worked, he sent flowers – a smile bouquet of her favorite lilies with a note that read: “I’m sorry. I’ll never stop being sorry. – Drew”
But there was no response. Not a single word.
Drew had found himself in Odessa’s trailer on set one afternoon, feeling the weight of his choices more than ever. She was scrolling through her phone when he walked in, and the look on her face told him everything.
“You’ve seen the pictures, haven’t you?” she asked, putting her phone down.
“Yeah,” he admitted, slumping into the chair across from her.
“They’re bad, Drew. Like…. Really bad. I feel awful for her.”
He ran a hand through his hair, his frustration boiling over. “The whole thing.. it’s gone too far. It’s not fair to her, and it’s not fair to you either.”
Odessa tilted her head, studying him. “You care about her a lot, don’t you?”
“She’s… she’s everything,” Drew said quietly, his voice cracking. “And I screwed it up.”
Odessa leaned back, crossing her arms. “Then why are we still doing this? If you’re so miserable, end it. Or at least talk to her before it’s too late.”
Drew sighed. “It might already be too late.”
Drew decided he had to do something, even if it was small.
That evening, he showed up at Y/N’s door. His heart pounded as he stood there, holding a carefully assembled basket in his hands.
Inside, he had included everything he knew she loved: her favorite chocolate, a small bouquet of her favorite flowers, a DVD of a movie she’d always turn to on bad days, a scented candle she once said reminded her of her childhood and a handwritten letter.
When the door opened, she stood there, her expression unreadable.
“I know I’m probably the last person you want to see,” he began, his voice shaky, “but I needed to come. I needed you to know that I’m sorry. For everything. I don’t have excuses. I just.. I hate what I’ve done to us.”
He held the basket out to her. “I remembered all the things you love, and I know it’s not enough to make up for what I did. But I wanted to remind you that I see you, and I care. I care so much, Y/N.”
Her eyes flickered down to the basket, taking in every item before looking back up at him.
“I don’t know if this changes anything, Drew,” she said quietly, her fingers gripping the edge of the basket.
“I know,” he replied, his voice barely above a whisper. “But I’m not giving up on us.”
And with that, he walked away, leaving her standing in the doorway, holding the basket and wondering if her heart could bear to trust him again.
TAGLIST: @princesspeach124 @idiotussupremus @eitaababe @13tter @drewsephrry @drewstarkeyzwhore @cooper8224 @maybankslover @elyseesarchive @ietss @esquivelbianca @josephandrewstarkey @willowpains @wtfdudesblog @purplerose291 @rafegf-real @matthewswifeyy @fangirl-magic @snowtargaryen @slut-era @leather-n-velvet
#drew starkey#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey x y/n#drew starkey x you#drew starkey x female reader#outer banks#drew starkey x oc#obx season 4#drew starkey imagine#drew starkey imagines#starkeyslibrary#drewstarkey#drew starkey fanfiction#drew starkey smut#drew starkey fluff#drew starkey angst
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hii, saw u wanted arcane requests. from what ive seen on tiktok, apparently jinx was able to escape after the explosion in the very last episode and survived and ran away on that blimp thing, so could u please write a jinx x fem reader where after the explosion, jinx comes to get reader and they run away together happily to another region to have a fresh start and have a quiet, peaceful life. 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 pls and thank you.
A Fresh Start (Jinx x Gn!reader)
Warnings: mentions of death, use of (Y/N) once
Genre: angst, hurt/comfort
Fandom: Arcane
Summary: see request
Word Count: 1.6k
No set pronouns for reader
•••
You still remembered every detail, every word said, replaying the moment in your head. You'd had a fight with Jinx, nothing serious you'd thought, but when she and Ekko found you, you could see the pain in her eyes. She came running to you, wrapping her arms around your neck.
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean all those things I said,” she apologized, her voice breaking. “You've always been there for me, and I've been ungrateful about that.”
You hugged her tightly, with your arms surrounding her waist, hiding your face in her shoulder.
“It's okay, it doesn't matter now,” you mumbled. “Are you okay?” You asked, breaking apart and caressing her face.
She simply nodded, but you could read her like an open book, and you knew that there was something she wasn't telling you.
Before you could keep questioning her, Ekko decided to speak.
“I hate to interrupt the sweet moment and everything, but we have to hurry if we wanna survive,” he said. You gave him a confused look, slowly breaking your embrace with Jinx.
“Yeah, the world is basically about to end,” the girl said. And both she and the boy tried their best to give you all the information you needed, trying to come up with a plan.
When you were almost finished with the globe, Jinx pulled you apart for a moment, wanting to talk to you.
“I really am sorry about before," she started saying, “I just couldn't think straight at the moment and I took it out on you.”
“Hey, I said it was okay and I meant it,” you comforted her, grabbing her hand.
“I just don't want us to be on bad terms, we don't know what could happen out there,” she whispered, trying to hold back her tears.
“We're not on bad terms, okay? Don't worry about that, my love,” you answered, not wanting to think about the worst case scenario.
“Thank you for not giving up on me, (Y/N), I'm so lucky to have met you. You mean the world to me, and I love you so much.” Tears were already falling down her cheeks, making it hard to contain yours too.
“I love you, too, baby.” You pressed your foreheads together, closing your eyes to better savour the moment. “Don't worry, we're gonna be okay,” you tried to reassure her. “I'm not saying today will be easy, but we'll make it, and soon this will all be just a dark moment from the past.”
She wrapped her arms around your neck once again, not being able to control her sobs anymore. You were taken aback from the sudden action and her reaction. Her embrace was tight and almost filled with dread, almost as if she was certain something bad would happen. You decided to get those thoughts out of your head. Danger was knocking at the door, and you couldn't ignore it anymore; the moment to fight had come.
When you got to the fight scene, Vi quickly joined you, and so did Vander. Ekko took control of the globe, making it crash into the building, knocking the air out of your lungs. When you finally got back on your feet, you quickly went to help Vi and Jinx against Vander, but a hard blow at you was the last thing you remembered before losing consciousness.
You had no idea how long you were out of it. Ekko's figure was the first thing you saw when you woke up, and he helped you sit down slowly.
“Hey, easy there,” he said. “You got hit pretty badly.”
“I'm fine,” you groaned. “Where’s Jinx?” He ignored your eyes, tilting his head. “Ekko?”
He only had to look at you, and you could instantly feel the world crumble around you. Tears quickly flooded your eyes, still looking at the boy in front of you.
“Tell me it's not what I'm thinking,” you pleaded.
“She sacrificed herself to save Vi.”
You closed your eyes, letting the tears roll down your cheeks. You wanted it to be some sick joke, for her to get into the room and tell you that it wasn't true, that she was fine and you didn't have to worry about anything. But you knew her, and you knew something felt off about her in that last conversation you had. Turns out something bad did end up happening.
•••
Not many days had passed, the pain still fresh. You were lost in your thoughts, staring at the city in front of you. You were in the spot Ekko had shown you not long ago, trying to find a bit of peace in contrast to the mess in your head.
Life in Zaun was very unpredictable, which made it difficult to make long-term plans, but also made it easy to not get attached to anything nor anyone. But Jinx was the exception. You just couldn’t stop yourself from getting attached to her, and now you were suffering the consequences.
To be honest you wouldn’t really change anything, not even the pain you were feeling right now. Changing things would mean not even getting to know her, and you were grateful to have met her, to share your life with her. You were simply paying life’s price for love.
You suddenly felt a presence behind you, but you kept your gaze to the front.
“I'd really like to be alone, Ekko,” you said, assuming that the boy had come to check on you.
“I'm not Ekko.”
You froze in place. You had to be hallucinating, it had to be the only explanation. She was gone, and nothing would change that. You shook your head in disbelief, looking up at the sky.
“I'm even hearing her voice now,” you said. You could feel that presence even closer now, and you quickly grew frustrated with what you thought was your own mind. “Leave me alone!” You screamed, turning to the presence behind you and freezing once again when you finally saw her.
“Hey, it's me,” she whispered.
You quickly got up, never breaking eye contact.
“But- You- How?” It was all you could say, barely whispering, still not truly believing what you were seeing. She was right there.
“I guess being injected with crazy amounts of shimmer to keep me from dying had its perks,” she explained almost jokingly, trying to lighten up the mood. “I managed to escape the explosion.”
“But I don't understand. Why didn't you come back right away? Why let us believe you were dead?” You had a million questions in your head, and you could feel your heart beating like crazy.
“I needed everyone to believe it, to have a fresh start. Vi would never give up on me if she knew I was still alive; she'd follow me to the end of the world.”
You still kept your distance from her, it all seemed unreal. A few minutes ago you were grieving her, and now she was right in front of you, as beautiful as ever. But you felt anger inside you as well. She could've told you, she could've saved you from that horrible pain of thinking she was actually gone for good.
“You knew you were gonna fake it all along, didn't you?” You realized, thinking about that last conversation you two had. “That's why you were so emotional, so shaken and distressed.”
“Baby, I-.”
“You knew, right?” You interrupted her, voice cracking with your words.
“I did.”
You closed your eyes. You didn't really know when you'd started crying, but the tears kept falling down your face.
“You let me believe you were dead, Jinx! Dead!” You didn't even try to hide how emotionally distressed you were. You needed to let everything out. The blue-haired girl broke the distance between you two, holding you in her arms while you sobbed into her chest, quickly collapsing to the ground.
“I'm so sorry, baby. I made a mistake and I should've told you,” she said while running her hand through your hair. You could tell by her voice that she was also crying, filled with guilt. “I'm sorry, please forgive me.”
“I get why you did it,” you told her after a while. “I don't blame you for wanting peace, but you have no idea how much it hurt me to think that I'd lost you.”
She cupped your face and made eye contact with you before pressing your foreheads together. “I'm sorry,” she repeated, feeling like she could never say it enough times to express just how much she regretted not letting you know before.
“I'm just glad you're actually okay, love.” You leaned in to her touch, savouring the moment after such turmoil.
She gave you a kiss on your forehead before speaking.
“I want you to come with me,” she uttered.
“Come where?” You questioned.
“I don't know, away from here,” she replied. “I really want that fresh start, but I know that trying to live without you would be absolute hell. I've had many uncertainties in my life, but you just feel right. If there's something I'm sure of is that I love you, with every part of me.”
“I love you, too,” you told her. “And I'd also follow you to the end of the world.” You let out a hopeful smile, and so did she before cupping your face to kiss you.
Her lips against yours felt absolutely right, like it was just the way it had to be, forever and ever. You belonged together, and there was nothing you wanted more than to build a future with her, away from all the ghosts from the past. You knew it wouldn't be easy, both of you had a lot to let go of but with her by your side everything felt a bit easier, and for the first time in a long time, you felt hopeful.
•••
i absolutely loved this request, thank you anon! i'm a sucker for angst
also i'm 100% sure she's still alive
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always forever ; vi (arcane) part three !
a collection of (modern) domestic life activities with vi ! college au , modern au , self indulgent
part one, part two, part three, part four soon !
note : this one’s a short one *sighs* i promise part four will be longer (& juicier, can’t wait for vi to meet the parentals)
content warning : swearing, nsfw (will let you know when the nsfw content starts!)
drable three : officially yours
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! who ever since you guys made it official(ish), became more comfortable in parading around the apartment shirtless. sometimes she’ll have a sports bra on or a wrap around her chest, but most of the time she’d just have her bare titties out (especially during warmer weather). sometimes when you scold her, she’d even joke around and ask you to join her. “free the nips baby!”
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! who’s your stereotypical masc lesbian. hello ?? the red/pink hair color, the one side of her head shaved, the tough exterior but is actually a softy deep down? i mean the woman looks tough and acts tough. despite that though, vi would 100% combust and explode into flames whenever you call her “my pretty girl”, “my baby”, “my girl/girlfriend”, most especially when you call her “my pretty violet”. if vi was a cut she’d be purring whenever she’s around you, if she was a dog her tail would be wagging 24/7z
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! who definitely has attachment issues :( she hasn’t really opened up everything about her past (which you don’t mind, you know that she’ll tell you eventually when she’s ready), but you know that something bad has happened in her childhood that affected her mentally.
ꕀ ever since you and girlfriend vi ! became a couple (officially), you noticed how she became clingier and touchier than usual. cooking? doing the dishes? rest assured that vi would be standing behind you. her front against your back as her head rested on top of yours, her arms resting around your waist. showering? taking a soak in the bath tub? the next thing you know vi would be knocking on the door and asking if she could join you.
during times where she felt as if she’s being too much she would try to distance herself, which you’d notice of course and it would always end up to you two cuddling. you know damn well that you’re as clingy as her.
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! who has never slept in her own bed ever since she told you she loved you. to be honest, it doesn’t really matter where she sleeps as long as it’s next to you. staying over at ekko’s for band rehearsals? you bet your fine ass she’s crashing there as well. visiting your childhood home for the weekend? your phone would always end up dead in the morning, the battery drained from being on call with vi the whole night.
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! who loves spoiling you. during the days where she’d wake up earlier than you (because of rugby or hockey practice), she’d always make sure to drop by the coffee shop you fell in love with to grab you your usual coffee and pastry combo. whenever she’s running late and doesn’t have the time to wake you up, she’d leave the food on your bedside table accompanied by a sticky note containing her scribbled handwriting.
to: the prettiest girl
from: the love of your life :p
good morning baby :D i hope you had a good sleep (pretty sure you did, you snored so loud last night lol) anyways, sorry for not waking you up and giving you the pastry and coffee. we finished practice late and i had to attend heimerdinger’s class :< i hope you have an amazing day mi luv <3 enjoy the food.
p.s pls text me when u wake up ;)
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! absolutely loves buying the two of you matching outfits, especially if they’re the stupidest, funniest, brainrot thing ever. she got you two matching fairy princess batman boxers, hello kitty x batman pjs, and the corny sexual shirts from spencers. she’d also plan couple halloween costumes in the middle of december.
“baby! i know what we’re gonna be for halloween next year?”
“omg what??? i love matching costumes.”
“sukuna and cinderella!! i can be sukuna and you’ll be cinderella of course.”
“… what?¿”
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! who loves taking you out for a late night drive, especially if you haven’t seen each other the whole day because of school, work, and extracurricular activities. vi hates it when she doesn’t get to spend time with you (yes, cuddling in bed before sleeping isn’t ‘spending time with you’). when both of you are finally home, she’ll offer to take you out for a drive immediately. doesn’t matter what you guys do or where you guys go, vi did not care.
feeling down in the dumps? had a rough day? failed a test? your girlfriend would immediately take you on a 30 minute drive to the nearest beach to stargaze (and maybe take a quick dip). hungry? vi will drive you downtown to ya’lls favorite fast food joint that’s open 24 hours.
ꕀ i think we all agree that girlfriend vi ! is a gamer. she has a gaming setup that costs around $5000 (probably more tbh), a ps5, and fucking nintendo switch. one day you got curious and asked vi to teach you how to play some of her favorite games and boy was she ecstatic ya’ll basically spent the whole day playing games, switching from the ps5, to the switch, and even her pc.
! nsfw !
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! is a munch. there. i said it.she LOVES eating pussy. i don’t make the rules
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! is a giver. she’d rather go down on you than you down down on her. despite that, she doesn’t really mind you eating her out (especially when you 69).
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! is definitely a switch, but tops you most of the time. tbh she’s a service top. anyways, she absolutely loves it when you ride her and sit on her face. something about you showing the tinniest bit of dominance makes her pussy drool, oh lawd she coming.
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! who loves your titties. rest-assured that she’ll either have her hands or her mouth on them all the time.
ꕀ sex with girlfriend vi ! be so good that it feels like two cis women might actually make baby.
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! likes it rough, but still prefers soft vanilla sex. her fave position (other than 69) is missionary, she loves seeing your face (especially when you come).
ꕀ ya’ll this woman’s stamina though. girlfriend vi ! can go for hours and multiple rounds. i mean she does play rugby & hockey, so it makes sense. its still crazy how long she can last though.
ꕀ girlfriend vi ! is an absolute sweetheart. aftercare is always a must. she’d wipe you down, runs you a bath (when you’re not too tired), would get you water and food as well. cuddles after sex is a must as well.
#vi x reader#vi arcane x reader#arcane act three#arcane#vi arcane#jinx arcane#arcane smut#violet arcane#caitlyn kiramman#arcane season 2#vi is so hot#ekko arcane#vi league of legends#caitvi#arcane x you#league of legends#sevika arcane#caitlyn arcane#jinx league of legends#wlw yearning#wlw post#wlw blog#wlw x reader
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𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐢 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝, 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞 | 𝐣𝐣 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤
pairing: jj maybank x fem!reader
tropes: 3rd person narration | soft boy jj | best friends to lovers | comfort | fluff
synopsis: reader’s battling against anxiety and during one of her anxiety attacks, jj’s there to help her.
warnings: heavy depiction of anxiety, anxiety attack.
wc: 2.1k
writing this as someone who suffers from anxiety and deals with it on her own, was really emotional; if you find yourself in this position too, please don’t be afraid to ask for help. mental health matters <3
song rec: breathin - ariana grande ♡
everyone fights their own monsters, some are physically visible, others are perceived. some people have to fight against their families, some against their friends. but one of the biggest and worst challenges, was to fight against your own head.
everyone is tormented by their own monsters. hers is called anxiety, the beast who had ruined her life.
at school, her grades started to drop because she was just so tired all the time she couldn’t even bring herself to open the textbook; half of the foods she used to love were cut out of her daily routine because she would get constant heartburn and stomach problems to the point where she wasn’t able to consume a full meal for days.
when it came to sleeping, she couldn’t fall asleep because her mind was always racing with awful thoughts. what if i don’t wake up tomorrow? do my friends hate me because i didn’t go out with them today? is my heart supposed to beat so fast? my back is hurting, is this a health condition? am i going to be alone forever? usually she would go on for hours, reaching three or four in the morning, until she either cried herself to sleep or she almost passed out because of how tired she was.
going out of the house became hard. she became afraid of taking public transportation because what if someone tried to rob her or kidnap her. she couldn’t take long walks anymore because what if something happens and i’m alone. she even had to stop going to parties because she couldn’t stand big and loud crowds of people anymore.
her mental pain became physical: constantly having back problems, her chest and throat always felt too tight to breathe, her body tingling out of nowhere all the time.
it would’ve been a lie to say all of this didn’t reflected onto her relationship with others; she never told anyone about her own problems, not that they could help anyway. so when she started to hang out less with her friends, she always had to lie. i’m grounded, i can’t go out. sorry, i have too much homework to do. i have the flu, i can’t come. my dad needs my help, i’ll come next time. eventually though, she would run out of excuses, and that’s how she ended up for the first time in a month at the château, surrounded by her best friends.
“girl, we haven’t see you in forever, i almost forgot your face.” kiara joked, nudging her a bit with her elbow.
“i know, i’m so sorry guys. past month has been crazy.” which wasn’t a lie per se, she had spent the last weeks having constant anxiety and panic attacks. in the morning, in the afternoon, at night. and every single time she felt like she was about to die, the impending fear of doom creeping inside her. it really started to become unbearable, to the point where she didn’t even notice how many days would go by.
“well you’re here now, that’s what matters.” pope chimed in, giving her a smile. somehow that made her feel a little bit more lighter, knowing that her friends didn’t actually hated her. anxiety made her overthink every little detail of her life.
even though she tried to appear relaxed the whole night, she still felt like she was being chocked by an imaginary hand, pressing harder every time she breathed. she was grateful that none of her friends noticed the stiffness in her body, it would’ve been to hard to explain everything.
at least she thought no one noticed. jj noticed, he always did. he would observe every little detail about her. and from the moment she stepped into the château he hadn’t been able to keep his gaze off of her, not even for a second. he missed her. he hadn’t seen her in weeks and he had become restless. day and night he would think about her, what she was doing, if she missed him, if she too dreamed about him like he did about her. that’s how it felt being in love with your best friend.
jj knew something was up with her. she was always full of joy and energy, but bow it seemed like she had lost her spark. he knew there was something wrong, especially when he saw her fidgeting with her rings, gazing anxiously around her. he knew something was wrong when she got up, excusing herself from the conversation, and almost running to the bathroom.
following her wasn’t probably too good of an idea, but jj was impulsive, so he did it anyway. amen to that, he would’ve dealt with the consequences later, like his confused friends asking him what the heck was going on.
as he entered the bathroom, she was sat on the toilet. her face so pale you would think she was about to pass out.
he sees her as she stares into the wall, her eyes fixed in front of her, full of fear. he notices as she bring her right hand to her throat, sliding slowly down her chest and pressing hard. he hears her breathing going faster and heavier, like she couldn’t catch a full breath. her hands shaking as she tries to ground herself and not slip into the arms of her anxiety.
jj had no idea of what an anxiety attack looked like, he had been fortunate enough to never had one, but he always thought they had to feel awful for whoever got them. but seeing her, his sweet little sunshine, shaking all over the place and being surrounded by a cloud of darkness around her, made his heart break into a thousand millions pieces. he wanted to help her, but he didn’t know how to do it in the right way. he just wanted to do something, and so he did.
“sunshine, hey. baby, look at me. c’mon lemme see your pretty eyes.” he kneeled in front of her, placing both of his hands on her knees and gently rubbing his thumbs against them.
everything was spinning around her, thoughts racing with all the emotions she bottled up and all the fears she always had. she couldn’t stop them, it felt like she was going to be swallowed up by a black vortex. but then she heard his voice, it was like hearing an angel talking. her gaze slowly shifted from the white wall to his eyes, his gorgeous blue eyes, usually shining like stars when they looked at her, but now they were the depiction of concern. she felt a sharp feeling of guiltiness running through her your veins, because the last thing she wanted was to make him sad.
“that’s it, baby. you are so pretty, my pretty girl.” he gave her a soft smile, slowly moving his hands from her knees to her thighs. he wanted to pull her close and hug her, but one time— and thank god for him and the one time jj actually listened to what he said— pope told him that when people had anxiety or panic attacks, most of the time they didn’t wanted to be touched. so, instead of being the usual impulsive jj he was with everyone, he took baby steps with her, not wanting to scare her or make her even more anxious.
her breath was slowly calming down, but the aching in your chest and the lump in her throat were still there, still feeling like she was going to suffocate any moment now, but jj pulled her out of her thoughts again.
“alright pretty girl, i need you to do something for me, ‘kay? i need you to take deep breaths with me, i know it’s hard but i’m here. you’re safe, i won’t let anything happen to you. breathe with me, baby.” his voice was so sweet and gentle, she actually thought she was going to cry because of how soft he was speaking to her and how he was trying to handle the situation. she nodded slightly, following his example as he took one deep breath and then exhaled. one deep breath and exhaled. inhale and exhale. and they went on, and on, until the tension she felt before started to leave her body, making her shoulders and back relax and her hands stop shaking.
jj didn’t say anything this time, he just looked as she regained consciousness of her surroundings. even though the attack was gone, it usually took hours before she could actually calm down completely. it was hard and she always handled them alone, but this time having him with her felt like a blessing from heaven.
feeling like she had just been pulled out of a dark hole, she launched herself into his arms, wrapping hers around his neck. he let out a sigh as soon as he felt her flesh touch his own, his arms reaching for her hips and his face buried deep into the crook of her neck. they stayed like this for a almost twenty minutes. he only pulled her in tighter, not wanting to let go of her because he knew as long as she was into his arms, she was safe.
30 minutes later they were laying next to each other in the hammock, her head resting on his chest, the sound of his heart beating calming her, like a lullaby. his hands were both placed on her back, rubbing small circles against the thin fabric of her shirt.
jj really didn’t want to break the peacefulness that surrounded them, but he had to ask her why she never told him anything. he felt like he was failing at being her best friend. “why did you never tell me?” his voice was low, sounding almost like a whisper.
“i- i don’t know. i didn’t want to bother anyone, didn’t want to be a burden.” jj stopped moving his hands on her back, instantly lifting his head to look at her.
“okay, know that i’m not mad, but, firstly, i’m not anyone. i’m your best friend, you would never be a burden to me.” his hands moved to her cheeks, lifting her face. “i’ve been through hell and back these past weeks. not seeing you, not talking to you for more than 5 minutes on the phone, not touching you. it nearly killed me, y/n. i was always on the edge of a breakdown, constantly snapping at everyone because i didn’t know how you were doing. were you safe? were you alright? not knowing made me go insane.”
he stopped for a moment to catch his breath. he was pouring his heart out, which he never do, but he just felt like he had to do it now. “and i’m not saying this to make you feel guilty, that’s the last thing i want. i just wish for you to know how much you mean to me. you’re the most important person in my life, you’re my best friend, my ride or die, my partner in crime. you- you’re my first love, and hopefully you’ll be my last one too.”
her eyes went wide at his words, and honestly she thought she heard him wrong. “jj, what- what are you saying?”
“i know the night wasn’t perfect, but please just lemme say this now because i don’t know when i’ll get the same courage again. i love you, y/n. i love everything about you. i love that weird sound you make when you laugh too much, i love how your eyes shine when you’re talking about things you like, i love how after surfing your hair become all curly. hell, i love even the things you do that should piss me off, like when you throw away my joint because i’ve been smoking too much or when you scream at me because i got in a fight with some kooks again. i love you so much it physically hurts.”
her eyes were watery now, tears threatening to coming out in flows. she didn’t know what to say. because seriously, what do you say to someone who sees you as the most incredible human being, when you can’t even love a quarter of yourself?
you say nothing. but you can do something.
that’s why, in the quietness of the night, under the stars and while she was feeling at peace for the first time in weeks, she closed her eyes and pressed her lips against it.
she wasn’t magically healed, she still had things to deal with. but now, she wasn’t on her own anymore.
#outer banks#jj obx#obx#obx1#obx4#jj maybank#jj outer banks#obx season 4#jj x y/n#jj maybank obx#jj maybank fluff#jj maybank x you#jj maybank x reader#jj x you#jj x reader
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No Apologies (2)| LH44
summary: the aftermath of the fallout between Lewis and Y/n. Are they willing to apologise and make up?
a/n: sorry it took so long. please engage before you leave!
💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌
"Mummy?" Called Leo from the backseat. His black curls were a mess from playing with them. Something he did when he got really bored or annoyed.
"Yes, my sweets?" Y/n looked up to see him in the rearview mirror.
"Is Auntie Sofie going to have popcorn there?"
"Yes, my sweets."
"And rice cakes?"
"Yes."
"And ice lollies?"
"Yes, Leo."
"What about-"
"Leo, Sofie always has your favourite snacks can you drop it!"
Leo stared at her in the mirror before jutting his bottom lip out and turning to the window. The cutest pout she's ever seen but her frustration and guilt didn't allow her to let it stick around.
She sighed to herself. He was just trying to keep himself entertained. Unfortunately, she was too overwhelmed to do that right now. "I'm sorry. Leo. Leo, look at me. Mummy's sorry about that. We'll get to Auntie Sofie's place soon, then you can ask her if she's got everything. Okay?"
Parenting definitely isn't for the weak. He stayed silent for a minute, still pouting violently.
"Okay."
The rest of the drive there was quiet except for a few sniffles from Leo. He wouldn't meet her eye in the mirror and continued to stare out the window til he fell asleep. Sofie's house was 2 hours away, but it was the only place she could go in order to take some time to think. The sky had changed to a light orange by the time she got there.
One couldn't tell that the small house actually had three bedrooms inside as well as a large living area and a small garden at the back.
It was the kind of home Y/n grew up wanting for herself. She'd spoken to Sofie about it during many childhood sleepovers. 12 years ago, she could have been upset that Sofie got to buy it first if it weren't for the fact that she had met Lewis by that point and moved into his luxurious Monaco apartment.
The door to the yellow house opened and Sofie came rushing down the path to the car. There were rollers in her black hair and her oversized shirt flapped in her haste. Y/n knew she didn't care what her neighbours thought - she probably walked to the nearest shop like this often.
"How dare you interrupt my evening plans with your emergency call." She grinned when she came to a stop on the sidewalk.
"What evening plans? Curling up on your dirty old couch with one of your dirty old cats to binge murder documentaries?" Y/n teased in return. Her own smirk twitching in amusement.
"Yeah! Best part of my week!" They laughed at that and hugged tightly. Sofie was the first to pull away and placed her hands on her hips. "Need me to go there and kick him out?"
Y/n sighed loudly. "Yes, no, I don't know yet. I just need to think."
Sofie rolled her eyes. "That's all you ever do when it come to Lewis. Think, think, think. There's never any action - proper action to sit and communicate. Look what it's led to."
"I don't want this lecture outside, Sof. Grab something to make yourself useful." She turned to the car to open Leo's door.
"How about I grab my best boy and you can carry in the rest, yeah?" She unbuckled a sleeping Leo then scooped him up and carried him inside, cooing as she went. They loved each other greatly.
Y/n watched in slight annoyance before grabbing the bags, locking and heading inside. Staying with Sofie was always a treat because they didn't get to live together during childhood due to Sofie being a product of an affair between her mother, Devi, and Y/n's father long before Y/n was even born. Everything ended messily when Y/n's mum, Lee-Ann, found out and demanded he cut all contact. But it only got worse a couple of years later when Devi turned up at the house with a very young Sofie and demanded a paternity test. Lee-Ann was nearly 9 months pregnant.
"So, what happened?" Sofie interrupted Y/n's thoughts once they were inside and settled. She was carrying a bottle of wine and two glasses.
"Oh, uh, he came home at 1 this morning instead of last night. No messages, no call-"
"What an arse." Sof mumbled into her drink.
"We argued in the afternoon about him not being around, me wanting a different life and other dumb shit we've been over before."
"Y'know, I have never heard you say that you sat down and talked things over. It's always either him starting shit at the worst moments, or you." Sofie pointed out.
"Me?? I don't start arguments." Y/n sat up in surprise.
"Y/n." Sofie deadpanned.
"What? I don't!"
Sofie rolled her eyes at her sister's denial and took another sip before stretching out in search of comfort. "See, this is why you two won't work. Neither one of you wants to take the blame or understand that both of you are the problem!"
Y/n stayed silent as she stroked the cat on her lap. She wasn't a problem. If Lewis stopped doing things to annoy her, then she wouldn't get annoyed and argue with him.
"I never once saw mum and daddy argue. Did you know that? Their marriage was a mess, they didn't sleep in the same bed, they rarely did nice things for each other but they never argued in front of me. I grew up thinking my family was normal.
Lewis plans these grand dates involving yachts and passports, fucks me til my soul leaves my body and gets me flowers twice a week. Yet we manage to fight almost daily. How is my marriage worse than my parents?" Y/n was crying uglily by the end of her rant. Pathetically wiping at her wet cheeks and hiccupping to get the words out.
Sofie pulled her close and rubbed her back while the cat, now annoyed by the noise, scurried away.
"Oh, my sweet Y/n." Her heart ached for her little sister who spent all her life trying to please people.
"We try not to do it in front of Leo or raise our voices when he's in the house, but I think he knows. He knows something is wrong, and I don't want that. I don't want him to hate us, Sof." More sobbing and coughing. Sof grimaced slightly. Y/n had always been an ugly crier, but she still wasn't used to it.
"Y/n, Leo is a loving child who sees no wrong in anyone because you two raised him that way. He won't hate you for trying to hold things together for him if you have genuine intentions." Sofie sat Y/n up and held her by the shoulders. "But if you're really so worried about how it affects him, then maybe you should divorce."
Y/n sat straighter at this. While yes, she had kind of threatened Lewis with one, she didn't really think they would go through with it. She hoped a long break was what the relationship needed, and then she would go back and all would be fixed. But at the same time, she wanted things to end here as they were without seeing each other again.
Sofie watched her sister absorb her words and process. Her eyebrows met and temporarily hid the scar she'd gotten when Sof threw a toy at her in a fit of rage. Blood had dribbled down her small face, ruined her clothes while Sofie had burst into tears, and scrambled to get their dad. Lee-Ann had demanded Devi keep her away from the house for weeks, and the girls weren't allowed to play unsupervised again. Y/n forgave Sofie immediately with a gentle hug, but 30 years later, Lee-Ann hadn't.
Growing up with a single mother, a guilt-ridden father, and his spiteful wife wasn't easy, and Sofie ended up struggling with relationships in her teenagerhood and adulthood. Y/n was the only person she could rely on and give her all to. She hated watching her suffer, but more than that, she hated watching Leo grow up in the middle of this. No child deserved an unstable home. Therefore, Sofie refused to allow Y/n to do so when she had the resources and support to prevent it. Leo deserved a better life even if it came at the expense of her sister's marriage.
"Y/n? Did you hear me?"
"Hm? Yeah. I just-"
"Mummy?" Leo stood by the doorway rubbing his small eyes.
Y/n made her way to him and hoisted him into her arms. "Let's go have a bath, my sweets. Then we can have a yummy supper with Auntie Sofie, okay?"
"Okay." He replied hoarsely and lay his head on her shoulder.
Once he was bathed and moisturised, Leo sat on the bed and pulled his clothes on, struggling all the way after confidently claiming he could do it himself. Y/n watched in amusement as he moved onto his socks despite his pajama pants being on backward.
"Mummy?" He took a break from his exhausting task.
"Yes, my sweets?" She slipped on the final sock.
"When we wake up here at Auntie Sofie's, will daddy be here?" His brown eyes shone brightly with innocence.
Y/n did her best to think of an answer without showing her annoyance at the fact that her son was very used to going to bed without his father and knowing he'd be there in the morning. She did all the hard work throughout the day, taking tantrums and accidents as they came just for Lewis to be the one to be showered with kisses and praises the next morning when Leo awoke.
"We'll be staying at Aunt Sofie's for some time, my Leo. Just you and me." He looked down sadly, and Y/n could basically see the gears turning in his mind. His thinking face was exactly like Lewis' - eyes squint, lips pulled to one side, puffed out cheeks.
"So no daddy?" He whispered.
"No daddy for now, okay?" She placed a kiss on his forehead and helped him off the bed. Together they moved to the dining room.
Later that night she pulled the duvet over Leo and his toys in the queen size bed. Supper had gone down without a fuss from him and now he was buzzing with excitement to call his father. Y/n handed him her phone with the contact on screen and moved out of frame.
"Here you go, press call. Yes, that one." They video called Lewis often enough that Leo knew how to handle the device so his dad could see all of him and his toys therefore he could say goodnight to everyone.
The phone rang once before being answered. Y/n smiled sadly at her husband's eagerness.
"Daddy!" Greeted Leo. He gripped the phone with two small hands and a big grin that showed every tooth and gap.
"Hello, my boy! You look nice and cozy. Are all your teddies tucked in proper?" The two went on to talk about Leo's stuffed companions, his night with Nathan and his week at school. Lewis wasn't just catching up on the day but also the week he missed. Y/n could see how happy he was to listen to Leo stutter and ramble his way through the stories. His brown eyes were bright, framed beautifully by lashes and crow's feet. His smile was wide, spreading further to laugh at Leo's jokes. But Y/n could also see how much he was hurting during this experience. His beautiful lashes wet from crying earlier, his lips slightly chapped from lack of self-care and his throat moving constantly to swallow the lump that was no doubt sitting there. It hurt her too to see him pain but she pushed it down by thinking of the many times he couldn't see her pain because he was too far from home.
"Daddy, mummy said you won't be coming to Auntie Sofie's. Why won't you come? When will I see you?" Leo's voice trembled slightly, and Y/n froze. She didn't mean to phrase in such a way that Leo thought it was all Lewis' fault - well, technically it was, but she didn't want Leo blaming his father. Not at this age anyway. She watched as Lewis sat in baffled silence before attempting to answer his sweet son in a reassuring way. If Y/n wasn't mature enough not to talk shit about him in front of their son, then he would be the bigger person and go about this nicely, he thought.
"Champ, I promise I'll take you to school on Monday, okay? We can spend some time after school as well. How's that?" Leo smiled happily at that, and Lewis felt a light weight lift off his shoulders. "Okay, well, it's 8pm now. Time for bed, yeah?"
"Goodnight, daddy." Leo let his father bid him and each of his toys goodnight and then passed the phone on to his mum. She pressed kisses to his brown cheeks then stepped out to take a breath in an attempt to compose herself. She lifted the phone to talk to her husband. He opened his mouth, but she quickly cut him off.
"You can't take him on Monday." She said sternly. His face dropped.
"Y/n, come on. No. Y/n, you can't do that to me, please. Please. You just heard me promise him that." She watched him beg with a stern expression. He looked like he was on the verge of falling apart. In front of their child he had held it all together -put on the performance of the century. But here, in front of the woman he hurt, he sniffled and grasped for straws. She wasn't impressed.
"We're two hours away, Lewis. School won't work so I'm going to let Leo stay home for the week while I look for a local school to move him to."
Lewis was shocked to silence as a tear rolled down his face. "Why would you uproot his life this, Y/n!? This isn't fair!"
She furrowed her brows at the volume of his voice. She had a lot to say about things that were and weren't fair. But before she could list them, he began shouting some more. "I- I understand that you're upset and you have every right to be but Leo shouldn't suffer because of that. You can't punish him."
"I'm not punishing him." She grew more frustrated.
"So you're punishing me?" He asked angrily, more tears.
"I'm not punishing anyone! I'm trying to make the best decision for him while dealing with everything that went down. Your house is empty because of what you did. This is not punishment, this is the consequence of your actions so maybe you should have that about Leo suffering before you ruined our marriage!" She's trembling and she's sure everyone in the house heard everything she just yelled.
Lewis scoffed before ending the call.
Y/n spent the next hour crying in Sofie's arms on the couch. She hadn't gone back to Leo's room to check on him and soothe him just in case he was upset by the call. She couldn't handle seeing him cry for his father right now. She couldn't handle being the bad guy to him. Sofie's hand on her back made it all a little easier to deal with. The purring cat on her lap didn't hurt either. She stroked its soft back gently while she sniffled and tried to find her words.
"Y/n, I don't want to make the decision for you." Sofie started. Y/n looked up into her sister's golden eyes, slightly scrunched due to the sad smile on her face. "But Leo should not be caught in the crossfire. And I know you know that."
"But I can't stay with Lewis, Sof. I can't be like mum and force my marriage to work." Y/n whispered. The thought of living with Lewis again made her scared for many reasons.
Sofie shook her head and brushed aside the black strand that came loose. "Your mum didn't force her marriage in order to create a good life for you. She did it so she wouldn't look like a bad wife to others. She wanted our dad to be the only person who wrong and immoral in the relationship."
Y/n felt her eyes tear up once more from the memories of her childhood with her mum who did everything in her power to keep things normal. Eventually it all fell apart and Y/n didn't want that for herself. She didn't want that for Leo.
"You'll only hurt Leo if you try to make yourself blameless in this situation. I don't care if neither one of you apologises and you end up dragging each other's arses kicking and screaming to every court in this country, as long as you put that sweet little boy first."
Y/n heard the slight tremor in her sister's voice and finally realised how this all affected her. All this time she'd been thinking of herself and her hate for the man she married while ignoring the bigger pain this was causing her son and sister. Her loving sister who never blamed her for being the treasured daughter in their chaotic household. Her loving sister who sheltered her from her Lee-Ann's nasty behaviour towards herself and never spoke badly of Lee-Ann in front of Y/n. Her loving sister who soaked up every miniscule second she got with her father but also happily allowed for Y/n to spend those limited moments with them.
Y/n lunged forward to give Sofie the biggest hug ever. She'd take Sofie's advice and think things over. The cat in her lap meowed unhappily at its new position squashed between the two women. They pulled away giggling.
"I love you, Sof." Y/n smiled using her sleeve to wipe her tears
"I love you too so stop getting your snot on my furniture." Y/n giggled and sniffled. "If you're really interested in the local schools, I'll give you a list of the good private ones. Too many of them are run by cunts with tight g-strings."
"Sofie!"
"What?? It's true, they wear them to keep the sticks up their arse in place." She picked up her drink.
"You're so mean, oh my gosh." Y/n laughed.
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On Sunday evening, Lewis was in the kitchen using the island as a desk for all his stuff - files, folders and his laptop. He'd even brought the printer down from the study because he couldn't stand to be upstairs while the house was this empty.
He reached for document being printed- an email from his lawyer helping him gear up for the divorce. He'd been on a call earlier with his accountant to start discussions about what would need to be done once the divorce papers were written up. He didn't want to do any of this. After the call with Leo and Y/n, he had cried himself to sleep on the couch. He had woken up very early on Sunday morning to a horrid headache and a worse heartache. As the day went on, his sadness turned to anger as he thought about everything. He refused to let Y/n make him feel this way and to take his boy from him like this. He'd then called his father who arranged to meet with him for lunch on Monday but suggested Lewis talk to a lawyer in the mean time to see what his options were. Lewis was more than grateful for his dad's support. He cherished the bond they had and the work they had put in to make everything work in the end. Y/n was well offside for the shit she had said about them, he thought. She would pay for every word that came out her mouth.
As soon as the printing machine stopped, the front door opened. His heart hammered in his chest when he took tentative steps to investigate and then he stared in disbelief, not sure what to do now.
Y/n stood at the door with a sleeping Leo snoring into the crook of her neck. Her lips trembled as she took a shallow breath.
"I'm sorry."
💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌 💌
Welp, now what?? This is not the end. Part 3 out soon.
Thanks for reading this far! Please don't forget to engage before you leave. (Asking to be tagged is not encouraged)
I do not consent to my work being uploaded onto another site or being altered, translated, fed to AI sites or stolen!!
#lewis hamilton#dad!lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton angst#lewis hamilton x reader#lewis hamilton x black reader#lewis hamilton x you#lewis hamilton fluff#team lh44#f1 x reader#f1#angst#ket's writing
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Loser!Vi Headcannons pt 2
Y’all gave so much love, I feel like I had to reward you guys ☺️
Warnings: uhhh same as last time, I guess. I’m too lazy to check what it was, masc4masc relationship
WC: 700
⭒ Vi is a chronic biter. You learned that pretty early in your relationship. And yet, you never know when it’s coming until it’s too late. She would act like she would be leaning in for a kiss…until she bit the closest part of your body; your cheeks, your arm, your ass
“OW— fuck Vi!”
”That didn’t hurt, you're being dramatic.”
⭒ Another cute but annoying thing Vi does is that she fake boxes you. Her fists will never come in contact with your face or body but she still finds it funny. She’ll even make sound effects while doing so. But the second you lightly punch her stomach to get her to stop, it’s the end of the world.
⭒ She cried like a baby when she got her nose pierced. You were with her and by how hard she clutched your hand, you would’ve thought she got shot. You made fun of her the entire time.
”Not only do you have a big ass back tattoo, you also have one on your face.”
“That’s DIFFERENT!”
⭒ Vi’s major changes every few months. She just loves doing new things and will get obsessed with it and unfortunately be bored with it in not too long after. However, she would probably get a degree in business so she could take over Vander’s bar once he decided to retire.
⭒ Sticking with the college theme for a second; you’re known around campus for being chill and somewhat friendly to others. Vi, on the other hand…people think she’s brash and her temper definitely doesn’t help. But people have noticed that when she’s around you, she’ll siphon off your energy and is a lot more pleasant to be around.
⭒ Vi likes kissing you more than actual sex. She’ll still never turn down the offer, but kissing you feels calming to her. After a day of classes or dealing with whatever, it is her favorite way to unwind.
⭒ Vi loves horror movies, and loves when you watch them with her (even if you hate them/are scared easily). Her favorite franchise is probably Friday the 13th but Ghostface is her favorite slasher. The only problem with her watching horror movies is her inability to easily fall asleep afterwards. Normally, it takes her five minutes to be knocked out.
”Cupcake, are you awake?”
”Vi, PLEASE go to sleep.”
⭒ Surprise to no one, she cuts her hair on her own. Every few weeks you’ll find her in the bathroom with scissors and a shaver in hand, trying her best to get her hair looking good. You help her with the back of her head and she appreciates you for that.
⭒ Vi is literally obsessed with you. Her entire camera roll is filled with pictures of you both or just you; pictures she took on dates or just candid ones. Her wallpaper is even one of you, a rare selfie you took and she cherished it as soon as you sent it. Vi even gave you a special ringtone and whenever you text or call her, she can’t help but kick her feet.
⭒ Like everyone, Vi has red flags. But her most noticeable one is that she’s hardheaded. She doesn’t like to listen, especially when she knows thinks she’s right. She will stand on business until she can’t…and when that happens, she’ll come back with her tail between her legs, hoping you’re not too mad at her.
“Hey…are you mad at me?”
”Did you learn your lesson?”
”I did. I’m sorry.”
A little something extra for my black!readers 🫶🏾
⭒ No matter how hard both you and Mel tried to teach her, she nor Jayce still understand Spades. Viktor got it down within thirty minutes, but those two were still clueless. So, you all decided on a more easier game, Uno!
Uno was banned that same night after you two almost broke up and she and Jayce almost got into a fist fight.
⭒ And someone said that Vi would take the fuchsia bonnet with the black headband, and that was totally the one I was talking about (cause I have the same one). She refused to give it back at that point so the only logical solution was to buy another.
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Hotch and Reader are both in love with each other and have been for years but are both too professional and care too mcuh about work and ruining things so they dont get together but they end up getting together finally. its angsty and delicious!! with a happy ending ofc! (bonus if smut is added at all!?!?!)
I love you in a place where there's no space or time
Masterlist || Ao3
AN: So sorry this one took so long to share, anon! I hope it's all you hoped for! xx
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Female Reader
Word Count: 13.6k
Tags/Warnings: Canon-typical violence, canon-typical themes, hurt/comfort, jealousy, fluff, angst, feelings un-acknowledged, canon-typical injuries, language, fade-to-black smut, sexual themes, friends with benefits, friends with benefits turned relationship, slow burn, family dynamics, intimacy with feelings, proposal, talk of marriage.
Sypnosis: Aaron Hotchner has always been a man of order and control, carefully compartmentalizing the demands of his work and personal life. But when a long-standing partnership with a member of his team—you—begins to blur the lines between professional and personal, he’s forced to confront feelings he’s buried for years.
Aaron Hotchner had always been good at compartmentalizing. It was a skill he'd honed over years of leading the BAU, of balancing the chaos of his work and the fragile peace of his home life—or what passed for home these days. And you? You were a complication he never anticipated but somehow couldn’t imagine his life without.
You’d been with the team for years, carving your place with sharp wit, unwavering competence, and a sense of humor that could soften even the darkest days. Somewhere along the way, your partnership had morphed into something more. Late nights at the office became late nights at his apartment, pouring over files as Jack played in the living room. Work dinners turned into shared takeout meals, laughter filling his kitchen. And the tension—the chemistry between you both—it became a thread stretched taut, always on the brink of snapping.
But neither of you ever said a word.
Hotch couldn’t pinpoint when it had started, exactly. Maybe it was the time you showed up with a Batman figurine for Jack, just because he’d mentioned liking the character once. Or the way you sat with him on the couch after Haley’s death, saying nothing, just being there when he needed it most. Or the way you touched his shoulder during a case, grounding him when his anger threatened to boil over.
It didn’t matter. What mattered was that now, you were a constant in his life, and he had no idea how he’d let you become that. Friends with benefits, the team might have called it if they weren’t too polite to say it out loud. But it wasn’t just the sex—though that was undeniable. It was the quiet moments. The way you fit seamlessly into his life, into Jack’s life. Like you belonged.
Like you were family.
Hotch watched you now, sitting cross-legged on his living room floor, a game controller in hand, as Jack giggled beside you. You feigned frustration as Jack’s character beat yours on the screen, throwing your hands up dramatically.
“You’re cheating,” you teased, pointing an accusatory finger at Jack, who grinned up at you.
“I am not!” Jack protested, his voice full of glee. “You’re just bad at this.”
“Bad at this?” you gasped, clutching your chest as if he’d mortally wounded you. “I’ll have you know I used to be the reigning champion at this game.”
Jack tilted his head, squinting at you skeptically. “When? Like, a hundred years ago?”
Hotch couldn’t hold back a laugh from the couch, shaking his head as he sipped his coffee. “Careful, Jack. She might just ground you for that one.”
You spun around, pointing the controller at Hotch like a weapon. “Oh, don’t you start with me. You’re supposed to be on my side.”
“I’m on Jack’s side,” he said smoothly, the rare smile tugging at his lips, softening the tease. “He’s clearly the underdog here.”
Jack beamed, puffing out his chest. “See? Dad gets it.”
“Traitors,” you muttered, shaking your head dramatically before turning back to the game. “Fine. But if I win the next round, you both owe me ice cream.”
Jack laughed harder, leaning against you as if you’d always been there. “You’re not winning,” he declared. “And even if you do, I pick the flavor. No weird ones.”
“No weird ones? Jack, I have excellent taste. Mint chocolate chip is a classic.”
“Mint chocolate chip is gross,” Jack said, sticking out his tongue.
You gasped in mock outrage. “Okay, now you’ve gone too far.”
Hotch set his mug down, leaning back into the couch as he watched the scene unfold. This was his favorite view: you and Jack, a picture of domesticity he didn’t dare name.
The ache in his chest was familiar by now. Warm, heavy, and terrifying all at once.
Later, after Jack had gone to bed, Hotch found you in the kitchen, drying the dishes. It was a quiet ritual you’d fallen into over time, one neither of you had ever acknowledged aloud. The hum of the dishwasher and the soft clinking of plates filled the space between you, but it was far from silent. The weight of everything unspoken lingered, just like it always did.
Your shoulder brushed his as you reached for a glass, the simple contact sending ripples of awareness through him. It was ridiculous, he thought, how something so small could affect him so much. But that was how it had always been with you.
“You don’t have to stay,” he said softly, though he already knew the answer.
You glanced at him, a hint of amusement in your expression. “You know I don’t mind.”
Of course, you didn’t. You never minded. Whether it was a case of collapsing into bed together after a high-stakes day or nights like these—quiet, uneventful, and free of tension—you always stayed. It wasn’t just about the times the chemistry boiled over; it was about all the moments in between. The ones that felt effortless.
Hotch set the last plate on the drying rack and turned toward you, wiping his hands on a towel. “Jack really likes having you here,” he said, his tone conversational but deliberate. “He talks about you all the time.”
“And you?” you asked lightly, with a teasing lilt that tried to downplay the weight of your question. “Do you like having me here?”
His brow lifted, a rare smirk playing at the corners of his mouth. “Why wouldn’t I? You help with chores and keep Jack entertained. I’m getting the better end of the deal.”
You rolled your eyes, shaking your head as you bumped your shoulder lightly against his. “Deflect all you want, Hotchner. I know you’d be lost without me.”
He allowed himself a small chuckle, one that softened the sharp edges of his usual demeanor. “I wouldn’t go that far,” he replied, though his voice held more warmth than his words. “But I like having you here. More than I probably should.”
That caught you off guard for just a moment, but you recovered quickly, the teasing smile returning to your lips. “Good,” you said simply, returning to dry the last dish.
By the time the house had settled into silence, Hotch found himself in the bedroom, sitting on the edge of the bed as he unwound from the day. He heard your soft footsteps before you appeared in the doorway, your presence familiar and steady. You didn’t pause or hesitate, instead crossing the room to climb into the bed—his bed, though it had long since stopped feeling like just his.
You always stayed, and it had become a routine neither of you commented on. The guest room was just there for show, untouched and unnecessary. Some nights, the pull of tension between you snapped, leaving no room for words or space. Both of you would end up breathless and wanting in bed. Other nights, like this one, were quieter. Still, you stayed.
“Are you just going to sit there all night?” you asked, your voice low and tinged with humor. You were already lying on your side, propped up on one elbow, as you watched him with a curious gaze.
Hotch smirked faintly, shaking his head as he joined you, slipping under the covers. “I thought you might enjoy the peace and quiet,” he replied, his tone dry.
“I don’t think you’d know what peace and quiet were if it hit you in the face,” you shot back, though your words held no bite.
He settled beside you, his arm coming around you instinctively as you shifted closer. It was a gesture that felt as natural as breathing now, one neither of you ever acknowledged, but both seemed to rely on.
“You know,” you murmured, your voice soft against the stillness of the room, “it’s kind of funny how we never talk about this.”
“This?” he echoed, though his hand lightly tracing circles on your back betrayed the calmness of his tone.
“This,” you said, gesturing vaguely to the two of you. “Me staying. Us… whatever this is.”
Hotch was quiet for a moment, his brow furrowing slightly as he considered his response. “Talking about it might ruin it,” he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper.
You smiled at that, the kind of smile he couldn’t see in the dark but could feel in the way your body relaxed against his. “Maybe.”
The silence that followed wasn’t uncomfortable. It was full of the things neither of you dared to say aloud. And as you shifted closer, resting your head on his chest, Hotch allowed himself the brief indulgence of pretending that this—your warmth, your presence—was something permanent. Even though he knew it wasn’t.
Your company was appreciated and needed more than Hotch knew, even at work. The case was brutal. A family annihilator who preyed on vulnerabilities, using twisted logic to justify his violence. Hotch could feel the weight pressing down on him, but he didn’t have to carry it alone. You were there, as you always were, your presence steadying him.
When the unsub was in custody, and the team returned to the precinct, you lingered in the corner, watching him. He could feel your gaze like a physical touch as if you were daring him to break the silence that stretched between you.
“You okay?” you asked finally, your voice soft. Never prying.
He nodded, but the truth hung in the air, unspoken. He wasn’t okay. Neither were you. But that was the deal, wasn’t it? To keep moving forward without acknowledging the things that could break you.
That night, back at the hotel, the weight of the day lingered on Hotch’s shoulders, pressing harder with every passing moment. Cases involving families always hit him differently, carving into the parts of himself he worked so hard to protect. But tonight, something else tugged at him—a sharper, deeper ache he couldn’t shake. It was you. It was always you.
He’d known you’d come. You always did on nights like this, when the line between partner and something more blurred into nothingness. The knock on his door was soft but unmistakable, and when he opened it, there you were, leaning casually against the doorframe as if this wasn’t an unspoken ritual.
“You weren’t going to sleep anyway,” you said, your voice low, tinged with exhaustion but still carrying that edge of teasing familiarity.
“Neither were you,” he replied, stepping aside to let you in.
The door closed softly behind you, but the tension in the room was anything but quiet. It filled the space between you like a storm waiting to break. You shrugged off your jacket, tossing it onto the chair in the corner, and Hotch couldn’t stop his eyes from lingering on you—the curve of your shoulders, the set of your jaw, the flicker of vulnerability in your expression you probably thought he wouldn’t notice.
“Rough day,” you said, breaking the silence as you turned to face him.
He nodded, his jaw tightening. “They always are.”
You crossed the room, your steps slow and deliberate, until you were standing just in front of him. “But this one was worse,” you said softly, your voice lacking the teasing edge it usually carried. “For both of us.”
Hotch didn’t answer, because he couldn’t. The words caught in his throat, the weight of everything unsaid pressing harder than ever. But you didn’t seem to need his response. You looked at him for a long moment, your gaze steady, searching, and then you moved closer.
It happened all at once and yet not at all suddenly, as though it had been building for hours. His hands found your waist, gripping you tightly as his lips crashed against yours. The kiss was fierce, almost desperate as if he was afraid you might vanish. And you let him, meeting his intensity with your own, your fingers threading into his hair, holding him as tightly as he held you.
It wasn’t just adrenaline from the case or the pull of attraction that neither of you could deny. It was the unspoken understanding that this—whatever it was—was the only way either of you knew how to deal with the weight of the lives you led. It was raw, honest, and utterly consuming.
You tugged at his tie, loosening it with practiced ease, your movements steady but charged with purpose. His breath hitched as your hands brushed against his chest, unbuttoning his shirt with a deliberate slowness that had his pulse racing. His own hands mirrored your urgency, sliding under the fabric of your blouse, feeling the heat of your skin against his palms.
"Are you sure?" he asked, his voice rough but soft, his forehead pressing against yours as he paused just long enough to look into your eyes. The question wasn’t about this moment—it was about everything. About stepping closer to the line, you both swore you wouldn’t cross but had already blurred so many times.
You didn’t answer with words; instead, you pulled him back into a kiss, which was softer this time but no less consuming. Your lips moved against his in a way that spoke of trust, of understanding, of a desire too strong to deny. His hands cupped your face, his thumbs brushing your cheekbones as he deepened the kiss, pouring everything he couldn’t say aloud into the way he held you.
When you pulled away just enough to whisper against his lips, your voice was low and steady. “I’m here, Aaron. Always.”
His name on your lips sent a shiver down his spine, and something inside him gave way. He guided you toward the bed with a gentle but unwavering urgency, his hands never leaving you. The soft glow of the room’s lamp cast warm shadows across your features as you looked up at him, your expression a mix of vulnerability and certainty that made his chest tighten.
The rest of the world disappeared as you both surrendered to the moment. Every touch, every kiss, every whispered breath was a testament to the connection you shared—a connection that went beyond words, beyond labels, beyond anything either of you could easily explain.
When you reached up to touch his face, brushing your fingers against the faint stubble along his jaw, he leaned into your touch instinctively. “Aaron,” you said again, his name a quiet anchor pulling him further into you.
He tilted his head down, his forehead resting lightly against yours. “You don’t know what you do to me,” he murmured, his voice low and raw, the words escaping before he could stop them.
“I think I do,” you replied softly, your hands moving to rest on his chest, feeling the steady thrum of his heartbeat beneath your palms. “Because it’s the same thing you do to me.”
The admission hung between you like a fragile truth, one neither of you had dared voice before. But instead of shattering the moment, it only seemed to deepen the connection that pulsed in the quiet space between your bodies.
Hotch’s hands found the hem of your blouse, his movements deliberate as he slid it up and over your head. His fingertips brushed your skin, the contact sending sparks of warmth that spread through you. You reached for the buttons of his shirt, your touch steady despite the tremor of anticipation that hummed in the air.
When you finally settled on the bed, his weight pressing into the mattress beside you, the world outside the walls of the hotel room ceased to exist. The past, with all its heartache and shadows, faded away, leaving only the present—this moment, this connection, this intimacy you both shared.
Hotch leaned over you, one hand bracing himself beside your head, the other trailing along the curve of your side. The way he touched you was reverent like he was committing every inch of you to memory. His lips found yours again, the kiss softer this time, more deliberate, as if savoring the quiet intensity of the moment.
But there was something else beneath that tenderness—a tension he could no longer hold back. His lips pressed harder against yours, the kiss deepening with a newfound urgency. His hand slid from your side to your thigh, gripping it firmly as he pulled you closer as if closing the space between you would somehow quiet the storm raging inside him.
When you gasped softly against his mouth, he pulled back just enough to meet your gaze. His dark eyes, usually so controlled, were filled with something raw, something unguarded. "Tell me if it’s too much," he said, his voice rough, the words both a request and a warning.
Your answer came not in words but in the way you hooked your leg around his waist, pulling him closer, your hands gripping his shoulders as if daring him to let go. “It’s never too much,” you whispered, your voice steady despite the flush of heat in your cheeks.
That was all the permission he needed. His hand slid up your thigh, his grip firm but not harsh, leaving a trail of heat in its wake. His lips found yours again, but this time, the kiss wasn’t soft—it was demanding, consuming, as though he was pouring everything he couldn’t say into the way his mouth moved against yours.
Hotch’s other hand tangled in your hair, tilting your head back to give him better access as he trailed kisses down your jaw and neck. He paused at the hollow of your throat, his breath warm against your skin. When his teeth grazed just enough to make you shiver, he chuckled softly, the sound low and rich. “Still okay?” he murmured, though the way his hands gripped your waist betrayed his struggle to hold back.
“Yes,” you breathed, your voice barely audible as you arched into him. “Don’t stop.”
He didn’t. The restraint that usually defined him seemed to unravel as his kisses grew rougher, his hands exploring with a certainty that left no room for hesitation. He shifted, guiding you further back onto the bed, his body pressing into yours, solid and unyielding. The way he moved, the way he touched you—it was as if he was trying to claim you, to prove that this moment, this connection, belonged to both of you and no one else.
As his lips returned to yours, his hands found yours, pinning them gently above your head. His weight and the intensity of his gaze sent a shiver of anticipation through you. "You’re mine tonight," he said, the words rough but filled with a quiet reverence that made your breath hitch.
“And what about tomorrow?” you teased softly, though your voice trembled with the weight of the moment.
Hotch’s grip on your hands tightened just slightly, his expression darkening with something that looked dangerously close to vulnerability. “Let me have tonight first,” he murmured, his lips brushing against yours, and at that moment, nothing else mattered but the way he made you feel—seen, wanted, and completely his.
The rest of the world disappeared as you both surrendered to the moment. Every touch, every kiss, every whispered breath was a testament to the connection you shared—a connection that went beyond words, beyond labels, beyond anything either of you could easily explain. Times like this, when cases were especially bad, it was a little rougher than tender, but neither of you seemed to mind.
The silence in the room was heavy but not uncomfortable. It was the kind of quiet that came after something unspoken had been shouted without words. Hotch’s chest rose and fell steadily beneath your head, your fingers idly tracing patterns on his skin, grounding both of you in a moment that felt suspended in time. The storm of the night had calmed, leaving in its wake a raw, unfiltered intimacy that neither of you could explain—or acknowledge.
But then you shifted.
The movement was subtle at first, just a slight pull away from his side, but it was enough to snap him out of his haze. He felt your warmth leave him as you turned, sitting up on the edge of the bed. He watched as you reached for your clothes, your movements slow but deliberate, your back to him.
“You’re leaving?” The words came out gruffer than he intended, his voice low and edged with something he couldn’t quite define—something dangerously close to vulnerability.
You hesitated, your fingers pausing on the fabric in your hands. “I should,” you said quietly, though your tone lacked conviction. “We both need sleep. It’s been a long day.”
Hotch sat up then, the sheet pooling around his waist as he leaned forward. “You usually stay,” he said, his voice softer now, but still carrying the weight of a question he wasn’t sure he wanted the answer to.
You glanced over your shoulder at him, your expression guarded, but your eyes betrayed you. They always did. “It’s different tonight,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
He frowned, his brows drawing together. “Different how?”
You stood, pulling on your shirt as if the action might shield you from the conversation you were both teetering on the edge of having. “I don’t know,” you said finally, shaking your head. “It just… it feels too close. Like if I stay, it’ll mean something.”
Hotch swung his legs over the side of the bed, planting his feet firmly on the floor. He reached for your wrist, his grip gentle but firm enough to stop you. “It already means something,” he said, his voice steady despite the turmoil swirling in his chest.
Your breath hitched, but you didn’t turn to face him. “We don’t talk about this, Aaron. That’s the deal.”
“I know,” he admitted, his grip loosening just enough to let you pull away if you wanted. “But tonight—” He paused, the words catching in his throat. “Tonight, I don’t want you to go.”
That stopped you. You turned slowly, your eyes meeting his, and for a moment, the weight of everything you both refused to say hung between you. You looked at him like you were trying to decipher some unspoken truth, but he didn’t flinch under your gaze. He couldn’t. He needed you to understand.
“I don’t know if I can,” you said finally, your voice wavering.
“Yes, you can,” he said, standing now, closing the space between you. His hands found your shoulders, grounding you just as yours had grounded him earlier. “Just for tonight. Stay.”
Your walls were up; he could see it in the way your jaw tightened, and your shoulders tensed. But he could also see the crack in your resolve, the way your lips pressed together as if to keep from saying something you might regret. You nodded slowly, and his hands dropped from your shoulders, relief washing over him in a way he didn’t entirely understand.
“Okay,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.
Hotch stepped back, giving you space even though every fiber of his being wanted to pull you closer. You climbed back into the bed, your movements slower this time, less certain. When you finally settled beside him, he wrapped an arm around you, his hand resting lightly on your back.
Neither of you spoke again, but the silence was heavy with understanding. He didn’t know what tomorrow would bring, and he didn’t know if either of you could keep pretending this wasn’t something more. But for now, it didn’t matter.
You were here, and that was enough.
The room was quiet again, save for the rhythmic hum of the hotel’s air conditioning and the faint sounds of life beyond the walls. You were back beside him, though the space between your bodies felt heavier than before, as if the rawness of what had just happened was an invisible barrier neither of you wanted to cross.
Hotch’s arm rested lightly on your back, his hand brushing the curve of your shoulder in slow, deliberate motions. He could feel the tension in your body, the way your breathing was steady but shallow, as though you were trying to keep your emotions at bay. He didn’t push; he never did. But tonight, the weight of everything unspoken was almost suffocating.
“You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to,” he said finally, his voice quieter, less firm than it had been when he asked you to stay.
You shifted slightly, turning your head to look at him, your expression unreadable in the dim light. “Do you want me to go?” you asked, and there it was—your defense, sharp and ready, a shield to deflect the vulnerability threatening to surface.
“No.” The word came out before he could stop it, his tone firmer this time, leaving no room for ambiguity.
Your eyes softened just slightly, but you quickly masked it, shifting to lie flat on your back, staring at the ceiling. “This feels… different,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “It’s not like the other times.”
Hotch turned to face you, propping himself up on one elbow. “It is different,” he said, his gaze steady on you. “But I think it’s always been different. We just don’t say it.”
You let out a breathy, humorless laugh, turning your head to meet his eyes. “We’re not exactly great at saying things, are we?”
His lips twitched into a faint smile, though there was little humor in it. “No, we’re not.” He reached out, brushing a strand of hair from your face, his fingertips lingering for a moment longer than necessary. “But that doesn’t mean it’s not there.”
You closed your eyes briefly, as if trying to absorb his words without letting them take hold. When you opened them again, there was something softer in your gaze, something that looked a lot like surrender. “You scare me sometimes,” you admitted quietly. “Not in the way you think. Just… the way you make me feel.”
Hotch’s chest tightened at your words, his hand moving to rest against your cheek. “You think I don’t feel the same?” he asked, his voice low but steady. “Because I do.”
The air between you shifted then, the tension softening into something quieter, more vulnerable. For a moment, neither of you moved, your gazes locked as though daring each other to break the silence. Then, slowly, you reached for him, your hand finding his and lacing your fingers together.
“I’ll stay,” you said softly, almost as if reassuring yourself as much as him. “But just for tonight.”
It was always more than just tonight.
Hotch nodded, his lips pressing into a thin line as he leaned down to kiss your forehead—a gesture so tender it felt almost out of place between the two of you. “Just for tonight,” he echoed, though the way his hand tightened around yours betrayed the truth.
You shifted closer to him, your head resting against his shoulder, and for a while, you both lay there in silence, the unspoken words still hanging in the air but no longer suffocating. Whatever this was between you—messy, undefined, and terrifying—it was enough for now. It had to be.
Aaron Hotchner prided himself on control. In his work, in his demeanor, in the way he navigated the chaos of the BAU—it was a skill he had honed to perfection. And yet, when it came to you, control felt like a slippery thing, something he grasped at but never fully held.
The days following that night settled back into the rhythm you and Hotch always maintained—something hovering between routine and denial. At work, you were as efficient and professional as ever, the picture of a seamless partnership. You exchanged clipped updates about cases, worked in sync during briefings, and traded subtle glances across the room that said more than words ever could.
Outside of work, the lines blurred more than ever. You still joined Hotch and Jack for movie nights, helped Jack with his homework, and shared quiet dinners that felt far too domestic for two colleagues who claimed not to be anything more. You fell back into bed together on those nights when the tension boiled over (and many nights when you both were just too tired not to just be), and yet neither of you ever spoke about what it meant. That was the unspoken agreement: not to name it because naming it would make it real.
It worked. Until Beth.
She had been kind, warm, and direct in a way that took him by surprise. Meeting her at the park had been pleasant enough—a chance encounter during one of his runs training for the triathlon. She’d struck up a conversation easily, and before he realized what was happening, she was smiling at him in that way, the kind of way that left no question about her intentions.
“I-I could use some tips--if you’re not busy?” she’d asked, her tone light but confident.
For a moment, Hotch froze. His first thought, inexplicably, was of you—how you’d look at him if you knew, the slight quirk of your brow, the teasing edge in your voice. And yet, beneath that, there was something else. Something heavier.
“I—” He hesitated, shifting uncomfortably. “I just don’t know my schedule. I’ll think about it.”
Later that night, as you sat on the couch in his apartment, flipping through a case file while Jack played nearby out of hearing, Hotch broke the silence.
“Someone asked me out today,” he said, his voice calm, almost too casual.
You didn’t look up immediately, your focus still on the file, but he caught the way your hand stilled on the page. “Oh?” you said lightly, though the tightness in your tone betrayed you. “Anyone I know?”
He shook his head, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “A woman I met at the park. Beth.”
“Beth,” you repeated, setting the file down. You finally looked at him, your expression unreadable. “And what did you say?”
“I said I’d think about it.” He paused, studying your reaction closely. “It felt… strange.”
You tilted your head, your lips curving into a wry smile. “Strange how? Like you haven’t been asked out in a while? Or…?”
Hotch sighed, his gaze dropping to the floor. “Like it would be wrong. Like I’d be… cheating.”
The word hung in the air between you, and for a moment, neither of you spoke. Then you laughed, though the sound was hollow. “Cheating? Aaron, we’re not—” You stopped yourself, the words catching in your throat.
“I know,” he said quickly, his jaw tightening. “But it still felt that way.”
You leaned back against the couch, your arms crossed over your chest. “How would you feel,” you asked after a long pause, “if someone asked me out?”
The question was quiet but sharp, cutting through the space between you. Hotch’s eyes snapped up to meet yours, and for a moment, he didn’t speak. His first instinct was to deflect, to downplay it, but the truth was already clawing its way to the surface. His eyes darkened at the thought.
“I’d hate it,” he admitted finally, his voice low. “I’d hate it, and I’d probably want to throw a punch.”
Your eyes widened slightly, his uncharacteristic bluntness catching you off guard. But instead of teasing him, you leaned forward, your elbows resting on your knees as you mirrored his posture. “Really?” you asked, your voice soft but steady.
“Really,” he replied, and then, after a pause, he sighed and ran a hand over his face. “There was a time… that officer in Seattle, the one who wouldn’t stop hitting on you.”
You blinked, clearly startled by the shift in the conversation. “The one who called me ‘darlin’’ every five minutes?”
Hotch nodded, his jaw clenching at the memory. “I had all I could do not to step in. Every time he touched your arm or found some excuse to be near you, I—” He stopped, shaking his head as if trying to will away the irritation that still simmered beneath the surface. “It wasn’t professional.”
A slow smile tugged at the corners of your mouth, and you leaned back against the couch, crossing your arms. “You were jeal-ous.”
“I wasn’t—” he started to protest, but the sharp look you gave him cut him off.
“You were totally jealous,” you said, your smile widening. “You hated that someone else even thought about getting near me.”
Hotch shifted in his seat, his expression stern but not quite able to hide the faint flush of his cheeks. “I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t have to.” You tilted your head, your gaze playful but laced with something warmer, deeper. “You know, it’s kind of hot.”
“Stop,” he muttered, his voice tinged with exasperation, though the way he avoided your eyes betrayed him.
You laughed softly, the sound lightening the tension between you. “Fine. But admit it—you wouldn’t like it if someone else was interested in me.”
“No,” he said simply, his voice quiet but firm. “I wouldn’t. Because…” He sighed, fidgeting, running a hand through his hair. “Because it would mean someone else has something I want but won’t let myself have.”
The confession hung between you, raw and unfiltered. You looked at him for a long moment, your expression softening, though there was still a hint of sadness in your eyes. “Aaron…”
“I know we don’t talk about this,” he interrupted, his tone firm but not harsh. “But you asked, and that’s the truth.”
You leaned back again, your arms wrapping around yourself as if for protection. “I don’t think I’d like it much either,” you admitted quietly, scrunching your nose at the thought. “If someone else had what I already think of as mine.”
Hotch’s breath caught at your words, and for a moment, the weight of what you’d both said seemed too much to bear. But then you looked at him, and something in your expression shifted—a quiet resolve that mirrored his own.
“We’re really bad at this, huh?” you said, a faint, self-deprecating smile tugging at your lips.
“Terrible,” he agreed, the corners of his mouth lifting slightly despite himself.
The silence that followed wasn’t uncomfortable. It was heavy, yes, but it was also full of understanding. Neither of you had the answers, and maybe you never would. But for now, the truth was out there, raw and unspoken, just like everything else between you. And somehow, that was enough. For now.
Life fell back into its strange, unspoken rhythm. You and Hotch continued your routines, the moments that felt too much like a relationship carefully tucked away, ignored but ever-present.
Hotch had made his decision about Beth without much thought, declining her offer politely but firmly. He told himself it was because his life didn’t allow for complications like dating, but he knew the real reason.
He didn’t bring it up again, and neither did you. But sometimes, when you caught his eye across the bullpen or during a quiet moment at his apartment, there was a weight in your gaze that mirrored his own. It was easier not to talk about it.
The unsub had been cornered, a desperate man with nothing left to lose. Hotch could see the wild look in his eyes, the way his hand twitched around the gun. You stood a few feet away, crouched behind a car door, your gun trained on the suspect.
“Put it down,” Hotch commanded, his voice steady, calm, despite the adrenaline coursing through him.
The unsub didn’t move, his eyes flickering between you and Hotch like a cornered animal. Then, in an instant, he shifted his aim—toward you.
It happened so fast that Hotch didn’t think, didn’t hesitate. He moved before the shot rang out, his body blocking the line of fire as he tackled you to the ground. Pain flared in his shoulder, sharp and searing, but he didn’t let it stop him. He rolled to shield you as Morgan and the local PD took the unsub down, disarming him within seconds.
“Aaron!” Your voice was sharp, filled with anger and panic as you shoved him off you, your hands immediately moving to his shoulder. “Are you—damn it, you’re bleeding!”
“I’m fine,” he said gruffly, though the pain in his voice betrayed him.
“No, you’re not fine!” You glared at him, your hands pressing against the wound to stem the bleeding as the medics approached. “What the hell were you thinking?”
“I was thinking I wasn’t going to let you get shot,” he snapped, his tone sharper than he intended. Your jaw tightened, but you didn’t argue as the medics came to his side.
Hotch sat in the back of the ambulance, his jacket discarded and his shirt pulled down over his good shoulder to expose the wound. The paramedic worked efficiently, stitching up the graze with practiced precision. He barely winced, his focus not on the pain but on you.
You were pacing a few feet away, your arms crossed tightly over your chest as you muttered to yourself. He could tell by the sharpness of your movements and the tension in your jaw that you were furious. He also knew it wasn’t just anger; it was fear, worry, and something else neither of you would admit.
“Does she know you’re okay?” Rossi’s voice broke through his thoughts. Hotch turned to see Rossi and Morgan standing at the back of the ambulance, their expressions a mix of amusement and exasperation.
“She knows,” Hotch replied curtly, his tone dismissive.
“She doesn’t look like she knows,” Morgan said, nodding toward you. “She looks like she’s about to tear you a new one.”
Hotch sighed, his hand clenching briefly at his side. “She’ll get over it. She’ll be fine.”
“Will she?” Rossi asked, his tone pointed. “Because from where I’m standing, this whole act the two of you have going is starting to wear thin.”
“What act?” Hotch asked, though he already knew the answer.
Morgan raised an eyebrow. “The one where you two pretend you don’t have feelings for each other. It’s getting old, Hotch. And frankly, it’s not doing anyone any good.”
Rossi crossed his arms, his gaze steady on Hotch. “You put yourself in the line of fire for her, Aaron. We all would have done it, but you didn’t think twice. That’s not just leadership. That’s something else.”
Hotch’s jaw tightened, his eyes flickering briefly to you before he looked back at them. “It’s not that simple.”
“Of course, it’s not,” Rossi said, his voice gentler now. “But ignoring it doesn’t make it go away. You’re not protecting her by pretending it doesn’t exist. You’re just making it harder—for both of you.”
Hotch didn’t respond, his gaze dropping to the floor of the ambulance. The paramedic finished the stitches and stepped back, leaving him alone with his thoughts and the weight of Rossi and Morgan’s words.
When he finally looked up again, you were still pacing, your anger radiating off you in waves. And for the first time, he wondered if maybe, just maybe, Rossi was right.
The atmosphere back at the BAU was tense, the usual hum of activity muted by the weight of the recent case. Hotch moved through the bullpen with his usual efficiency, though the stiffness in his shoulder and the dull ache radiating from the stitches served as a constant reminder of how the day had started.
You were another reminder.
Since the moment he got out of that ambulance and was cleared to finish the case, you’d been snapping at him—sharp comments about his paperwork, curt responses to his questions, even a pointed remark about his “reckless heroics” during the case. It was all thinly veiled anger, but it wasn’t lost on anyone. Rossi shot him a knowing glance as he passed; Morgan smirked but wisely stayed out of it, and even JJ looked like she was holding back a comment. He’s pretty sure he even heard a scoffing laugh out of Emily at one of your brattier comments.
“Hotch,” you said sharply, interrupting his conversation with Reid about a case update. “If you want those reports done before midnight, you might want to clarify what you actually need. Or is guessing part of the job now?”
Reid froze mid-sentence, his wide eyes darting between you and Hotch. The tension in the room was palpable, and Hotch’s patience, already worn thin by the soreness in his shoulder and the mental fatigue of the case, snapped.
“Y/N,” he said, his tone firm but controlled. “My office. Now.”
You opened your mouth to retort, but before you could get a word out, he reached for your elbow and guided you firmly toward his office. The rest of the team watched with varying degrees of curiosity and amusement as you allowed yourself to be led, though the fury in your eyes was unmistakable.
Once inside his office, Hotch closed the door behind you, the sound louder than it needed to be. He released your arm, his hand lingering for only a second before he stepped back, his dark eyes locking onto yours.
“What the hell was that?” you demanded, crossing your arms over your chest. “You just dragged me in here like I’m fucking child.”
“You’ve been snapping at me all day,” he shot back, his voice low but sharp. “What do you expect me to do? Let you keep undermining me in front of the team?”
“Oh, so now I’m undermining you?” you said, your voice rising. “God forbid anyone have a reaction to you throwing yourself in front of a bullet.”
“I did what I had to do,” he said, his tone clipped. “It’s my job to protect the team.”
“You’re not invincible, Aaron!” you snapped, your voice breaking slightly on his name. “You can’t just—do that, and then act like everything’s fine. Like we’re all fine.”
The room fell silent, the weight of your words hanging heavy in the air. Hotch pinched the bridge of his nose, letting out a slow breath as he tried to keep his frustration in check. He was tired. Tired from the case. Tired from the injury. Tired of the running.
“I wasn’t going to stand there and let you get hurt,” he said finally, his voice quieter but no less firm.
“And what about you getting hurt?” you fired back. “Do you think any of us would be okay with that? Do you think I would?”
Hotch froze, the intensity in your voice cutting through his fatigue and frustration. For a moment, he didn’t know what to say. The raw emotion in your eyes, the way your shoulders shook slightly as you tried to keep yourself composed—it was almost too much.
“This isn’t about the case, is it?” he asked, his voice softer now, though there was an edge of steel to it. “You’re not just angry about what happened.”
You opened your mouth to argue, but no words came out. Instead, you turned away, your arms tightening around yourself as if to create some kind of barrier.
Hotch took a step closer, his tone steady but tinged with something softer, something almost pleading. “Talk to me.”
You turned back to him, your eyes blazing with anger, but beneath it, he could see something else—fear, worry, hurt. “Why should I? We never talk about anything. Not really.”
The words hit him like a blow, the truth in them undeniable. And for the first time, he didn’t have an answer.
Hotch stood still, every muscle in his body taut as he let your words settle in the air. The frustration and fire in your voice cut through him, but it was the vulnerability underneath that made him pause. He had always prided himself on reading people, on staying composed no matter the situation, but you had a way of stripping him bare, of making him feel exposed in ways he wasn’t prepared to handle.
“You think I don’t feel it too?” you demanded, stepping closer, your voice trembling with restrained emotion. “Every time you step in front of danger, every time you put yourself in harm’s way for me—it eats at me. And then you have the nerve to act like it’s just another day at the office, like it doesn’t mean anything.”
“I don’t act like it doesn’t mean anything,” he said, his voice sharp, cutting through your words. “But we can’t afford for it to mean what you think it does.”
“And why is that?” you snapped, crossing your arms tighter over your chest. “Because it might make you feel something real? Because it might mean admitting that this—whatever this is—actually matters?”
Hotch’s jaw tightened, the words catching in his throat. He wanted to argue, to say that you didn’t understand, but the truth was, you understood better than anyone. “Because if something happens to you,” he said finally, his voice low but cracking at the edges, “it would destroy me.”
Your breath hitched, but you didn’t back down. “And you think it’s any different for me? You think watching you throw yourself in front of a bullet didn’t tear me apart? God, Aaron, don’t you get it? You don’t get to make that choice for me.”
He turned away, running a hand through his hair, his composure fraying with every word you spoke. “I’m trying to protect you.”
“From what?” you demanded. “From being hurt? From feeling? Because if that’s your plan, it’s not working. I’m already hurt. I’ve been hurt for years because we refuse to deal with this.”
“You think it’s that simple?” he asked, spinning back to face you, his voice rising. “That we can just talk about it and everything will magically be fine?”
“No,” you shot back, your voice rising to match his. “But pretending it’s not there isn’t fine either. Ignoring it doesn’t make it go away—it just makes it worse.”
The room was suffocating now, the air thick with all the words neither of you had said for years. Hotch’s mind raced, every argument, every excuse colliding with the raw truth you had thrown at him.
“This job…” he started, but his voice faltered. He took a steadying breath and tried again. “This job demands everything. It doesn’t leave room for mistakes, for weakness.”
“And you think this is weakness?” you asked, your voice trembling now, the anger giving way to something quieter but no less intense. “Do you really think what we feel—what we’ve built—is a liability?”
Hotch’s shoulders slumped slightly, the fight draining out of him as the weight of your words pressed down on him. He opened his mouth to respond but found himself struggling to find the right words.
“I don’t know,” he admitted finally, his voice raw. “I don’t know how to do this, how to balance it. I don’t know how to protect you and still let myself have you.”
You stared at him, the raw honesty in his voice cutting through your defenses. But it wasn’t enough—not yet.
“You can’t have it both ways, Aaron,” you said, your voice soft but firm. “You can’t keep me close enough to feel everything and then pretend it doesn’t exist when it gets too hard.”
“I know,” he said, his voice cracking under the weight of his admission. “I know I can’t. But I don’t know how to do this without risking everything.”
“Neither do I,” you said, taking a step closer, your voice trembling. “But the risk of losing this, of losing us—aren’t we worth figuring it out?”
Hotch closed his eyes, the tension in his shoulders finally breaking as your words sank in. He couldn’t argue with you, not when everything you said mirrored the storm that had been raging inside him for years. He opened his eyes and looked at you, really looked at you, and for the first time, he let himself feel the full weight of what you meant to him.
The silence between you stretched, heavy and electric, the air in the room thick with everything you’d both left unsaid for far too long. Hotch’s gaze flickered to yours, searching for something he couldn’t name but desperately needed. His own words had fallen short, his admission incomplete, and he could feel the weight of it pressing down on him.
But then you spoke, and it hit him like a tidal wave.
“I can’t keep doing this, Aaron,” you said, your voice trembling but strong, each word deliberate and cutting through the fog of tension. “I can’t keep being someone you make love to, someone you fuck when it gets to be too much. Someone you play house with when we’re with Jack. You can’t look me in the eyes and expect me to pretend I’m not already part of your family.”
He flinched, the raw honesty in your voice slicing through the walls he’d spent years building. “You are part of my family,” he said, the words spilling out before he could stop them.
“Then why do we keep acting like I’m not?” you fired back, your tone sharper now, anger laced with pain. “Why do you let me stay, let me take care of Jack, let me sleep in your bed—let me love you—but we act like it doesn’t mean anything?”
Hotch’s breath caught, his chest tightening as your words hit their mark. He opened his mouth to respond, but you weren’t done.
“You jumped in front of a bullet for me, Aaron,” you continued, your voice breaking slightly. “And you expect me to believe you’d do that for anyone else? That I’m just another member of the team? I’m not stupid. I know what this is—what we are. But I can’t keep pretending it’s nothing.”
He stepped closer, his hand twitching at his side, but he didn’t reach for you. “You think I don’t know that?” he asked, his voice low and rough. “You think I don’t feel it every time I look at you, every time I hear Jack ask about you when you’re not there? You think I don’t know how much it means to me that you’re part of my life?”
“Then we have to stop running from it!” you exclaimed, your voice cracking as your arms fell to your sides. “Stop pretending it’s safer to ignore it, because it’s not. It’s killing me, Aaron. I’m so in love with you, it hurts. And it’s killing me to keep living like this, to keep pretending we don’t already know the truth.”
The words hung in the air, raw and unfiltered, leaving him breathless. He felt like the ground had been ripped out from under him, like the armor he’d spent years perfecting had finally crumbled to dust. He didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to make sense of the storm inside him.
You shook your head, stepping back slightly, though your eyes never left his. “I need you to decide,” you said softly, but the steel in your voice was unmistakable. “Because I can’t keep doing this—loving you like this—if you’re not willing to let yourself love me back.”
Hotch’s throat felt tight, the weight of your ultimatum pressing down on him like a physical force. But as he looked at you, at the pain and determination in your eyes, something inside him shifted. He couldn’t lose you. Not like this.
He stepped closer, his hand reaching for yours, his grip firm but gentle. “You’re right,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper but filled with conviction. “I’ve been running. I’ve been terrified. But I can’t lose you—not like this. Not ever.”
Your breath hitched, your eyes searching his, and for a moment, the room was silent, the tension between you finally giving way to something else. Something undeniable.
“I love you,” he said, the words raw and unpolished, but no less true. “I don’t know how to do this, but I want to try. With you.”
Tears welled in your eyes, but you didn’t look away. “Then stop pretending I’m anything less than yours.”
“I won’t,” he promised, his voice steady now. “Not anymore.”
The air between you shifted, the weight of everything unsaid finally lifting as you stepped into him, your arms wrapping around him as his enveloped you. It wasn’t a resolution, not entirely, but it was a beginning. A chance to stop running, to stop pretending, and to finally face the truth you’d both been avoiding for far too long.
The embrace lingered, grounding them both in a moment of quiet resolution. Hotch could feel your heartbeat against his chest, the tension in your body slowly melting away as his arms tightened around you. For once, the silence between you wasn’t filled with unsaid words or guarded emotions. It was calm. Real.
But the calm couldn’t last forever.
As you stepped back slightly, your hands still resting on his chest, Hotch caught the faintest hint of a smirk on your lips. It was subtle, but he recognized it immediately—the way your mouth twitched just before you said something that would almost certainly drive him up a wall.
“You know we just gave the entire team front-row seats to our meltdown, right?” you said, tilting your head as you looked up at him. “They’re probably out there placing bets on how long it’ll take us to come out of this office.”
Hotch sighed, the corner of his mouth twitching as he fought the urge to smile. “I’d imagine Rossi’s leading the pool.”
“Of course he is,” you replied, stepping back fully now, though the warmth in your voice remained. “He’s been waiting for this for years. Probably thinks he’s some kind of love oracle.”
Hotch allowed himself a quiet chuckle, shaking his head as he rubbed the back of his neck. “We’ll have to face them eventually,” he admitted, his tone resigned but not without a trace of humor. “It’s not like they’ll forget about it by morning.”
You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms as you leaned back against the edge of his desk. “Oh, they won’t. They’ve been watching us like hawks for years. I wouldn’t be surprised if Morgan starts calling us ‘Mom and Dad’ the second we walk out of here.”
Hotch froze for a moment, his brow furrowing slightly. “What do you mean, ‘Mom and Dad’?”
Your grin widened, and you shrugged nonchalantly. “You didn’t know? The team’s been referring to us as Mom and Dad behind our backs for ages.”
He blinked, his lips parting slightly as he tried to process your words. “They… what?”
“Oh, come on, Aaron,” you said, your tone teasing now. “You’ve seen how they act around us. Morgan and Reid bicker like siblings, and JJ’s always trying to keep the peace. They’ve practically assigned us roles in their little BAU family.”
Hotch sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he shook his head. “That’s ridiculous.”
“Is it?” you asked, your voice laced with amusement. “Because it makes a lot of sense when you think about it. I mean, you are kind of a dad to everyone, and I—” You stopped abruptly, the teasing edge in your voice faltering for just a moment before you continued. “Well, I guess I’m just always around.”
Hotch looked at you then, his gaze softening. “You’re not just always around,” he said quietly, his voice steady. “You’re part of this team. You’re part of my life. And, apparently, the team’s ‘mom,’ whether we like it or not.”
The warmth in his voice made you smile, and for a moment, the tension from earlier felt like a distant memory. “Well,” you said, pushing off the desk and straightening your posture, “if we’re going to face them, we might as well lean into it.”
Hotch raised an eyebrow. “Lean into it?”
“Sure,” you replied, a mischievous glint in your eye. “Let them think they’ve been right all along. It’ll make their day.”
He sighed again, though the faint smile tugging at his lips betrayed his amusement. “You’re enjoying this far too much.”
“Maybe,” you said, moving toward the door. “But it’s not every day we give them this much to gossip about. Might as well embrace it.”
As you reached for the door handle, you turned back to him, your expression softening slightly. “You ready?”
Hotch straightened, his shoulders squaring as he stepped forward. “Not even a little.”
Your laugh was soft but genuine, and as you opened the door, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief. Whatever was waiting for the two of you on the other side, you’d face it together. And that, at least, was something he could hold onto.
The weeks that followed were, on the surface, remarkably unchanged. You and Hotch still worked side by side at the BAU, the same unspoken rhythm of partnership guiding your every move. Your routines remained intact—late nights at his apartment, dinners with Jack, quiet moments stolen away from the chaos of your jobs. But now, there was something new woven into the fabric of it all. Something quiet and steady: the acknowledgement of what you were to each other.
It started small. He would brush his fingers against yours when no one was looking, or you’d linger in his office just a little longer than necessary, your smiles softer, your words laced with warmth. And the words “I love you” slipped into your conversations as naturally as if they’d always been there.
One night, after a particularly grueling case, you both returned to his apartment, the comforting routine of shedding your workday as familiar as ever. Jack was already in bed, the soft glow of the living room lamp casting a warm light as you both settled in.
Hotch disappeared into his home office for a moment, returning with a folder in his hand. He handed it to you without a word, his expression unreadable.
You took it, raising an eyebrow as you opened it. “What’s this?” you asked, flipping through the pages.
“Employee relationship disclosure paperwork,” he said simply, his tone neutral but his lips twitching with the faintest hint of amusement.
Your head snapped up, your eyes narrowing as a slow smile tugged at the corners of your mouth. “Employee relationship paperwork?” you echoed, setting the folder on the coffee table. “What exactly are we calling this, Aaron?”
Hotch paused, clearly caught off guard by your question. “What do you mean?” he asked carefully.
You leaned back, crossing your arms as you looked at him with mock seriousness. “I mean, if we’re filling out forms, that means we’re officially labeling this, right? So, what are we? Is this… a relationship?”
His brow furrowed slightly, as though the question confused him. “Of course it’s a relationship,” he said, his voice steady. “It has been for a long time.”
You tilted your head, your lips quirking into a teasing smile. “Oh, really? Because last I checked, we’ve been playing house without acknowledging anything for years. So what’s the label, Hotchner? Are we ‘dating’? Am I your ‘girlfriend’?” You said the words with a playful lilt, but there was a genuine curiosity beneath your teasing tone.
Hotch hesitated, his jaw tightening as he considered your question. “I don’t think ‘girlfriend’ really fits,” he said finally, his tone thoughtful. “It feels… juvenile.”
You couldn’t stop the laugh that bubbled out of you. “Juvenile? Aaron, you sound like you’re 100 years old. What would you prefer? ‘Lady friend’? ‘Companion’?”
He shot you a pointed look, though the warmth in his eyes undercut his irritation. “I’m serious.”
“So am I,” you replied, still smiling. “If ‘girlfriend’ doesn’t fit, what does? You could’ve at least asked me to go steady or something.”
That earned you a quiet laugh, and Hotch shook his head as he sat beside you on the couch. “You’re impossible.”
“And you’re old-fashioned,” you shot back, nudging his shoulder with yours. “But seriously, what is this? What are we calling it?”
Hotch turned to face you fully, his expression softening. “We don’t need a label,” he said after a moment. “But if you want one… yes, you’re my girlfriend. My partner. Whatever word you want to use.”
Your smile widened, your teasing demeanor giving way to something warmer. “Your girlfriend, huh? Never thought I’d hear you say that.”
He smirked, leaning back against the couch. “You make me say a lot of things I never thought I’d say.”
You reached for his hand, lacing your fingers through his. “I like the sound of it,” you said softly. “But you know, if this is going to be official, you’re going to have to deal with the team making fun of us.”
“I’ve dealt with worse,” he replied, his voice steady but tinged with amusement.
Hotch felt the faintest tug of a smile on his lips as your fingers threaded through his. The warmth of your touch steadied him in a way few things ever could. He tilted his head slightly, his gaze resting on you with that quiet intensity he so often wore, but this time there was a softness beneath it.
“You’re going to have to deal with it too,” he added, his voice quieter now, almost teasing. “You think Morgan’s not going to have a field day the second he hears about this?”
You chuckled, leaning back against the couch and letting your head rest on his shoulder. “Morgan’s going to call me ‘Mom’ for the rest of my career,” you said with a grin. “And don’t even get me started on Rossi. He’s probably already planning the toast for our wedding.”
Hotch groaned softly, though there was no real frustration in the sound. “Rossi thinks he knows everything,” he muttered.
“Well,” you teased, “he was right about this.”
He didn’t respond right away, his gaze drifting down to your intertwined hands. He knew the rest of the team would have plenty to say, but for once, he didn’t feel the usual tension that accompanied such thoughts. Instead, there was a quiet acceptance, a sense of inevitability that, despite his usual resistance to change, felt strangely comforting.
Your voice broke through his thoughts. “You know, I don’t think I’ve ever actually said it out loud.”
“Said what?” he asked, tilting his head slightly to look at you.
“That you’re my boyfriend,” you said, the word tumbling out casually, but the way your lips curled into a playful smile told him you were testing it, savoring the way it sounded.
Hotch blinked, his brows lifting slightly. “Your boyfriend,” he repeated, the word feeling foreign but oddly fitting on his tongue.
“Yes,” you said, your tone mockingly serious now. “You know, boyfriend. Partner. Significant other. Lover—”
“Stop,” he interrupted, though the faintest hint of color crept into his cheeks as he shook his head. “I get it.”
You grinned up at him, clearly pleased with his reaction. “I think it suits you.”
“I feel ridiculous,” he admitted, though there was no heat in his words.
“Ridiculously lucky,” you corrected with a smirk.
Hotch sighed, though his lips twitched upward in a reluctant smile. “You’re insufferable.”
“And you love it,” you shot back, your tone light but laced with something deeper, something unspoken that now didn’t need to be.
He leaned back against the couch, letting out a quiet hum of agreement. “Maybe I do.”
“See? You’re getting the hang of this already, boyfriend,” you said, your grin widening.
He shook his head, chuckling softly as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head. “You’re going to drive me crazy.”
“Good,” you replied, settling into his side. “That’s half the fun.”
Hotch’s lips twitched as he let your words settle, your playful tone doing little to mask the deeper warmth behind them. He tilted his head, watching the way you fit so effortlessly into his side, your teasing smile lighting up a part of him he rarely let anyone see.
“‘Boyfriend,’” he repeated softly, tasting the word again like it was foreign but not unwelcome. “I think I still prefer something more… permanent.”
You lifted your head slightly, your brow arching in curiosity. “Oh?” you asked, your tone laced with amusement. “What would that be? Partner? Spouse? Or—” You grinned, the mischief returning to your expression. “Are you saying you’re more interested in ‘husband’?”
Hotch didn’t flinch, though the faintest flicker of color touched his cheeks. He met your gaze, his expression steady, though his lips quirked in a faint smirk. “If we’re being honest,” he said, his voice calm and deliberate, “that does sound like it fits better.”
Your jaw dropped slightly, your mock surprise more playful than genuine. “Aaron Hotchner, did you just casually suggest skipping the whole dating phase and jumping right into wedded bliss?”
He shrugged, leaning back against the couch with an air of calm that was entirely deliberate. “Considering we’ve been acting like we’re married for years already, it doesn’t seem like that big of a leap.”
You laughed, the sound bright and genuine as you swatted his chest lightly. “You are ridiculous. You’re not even my fiancé, and you’re already talking about being my husband.”
“Like I said,” he replied, his voice soft but steady, “I prefer more permanent labels.”
Your grin softened, your eyes searching his as the teasing edge in your tone gave way to something quieter, more reflective. “You’re serious, aren’t you?” you asked, the question almost tentative.
Hotch nodded slightly, his gaze unwavering. “I don’t take things lightly,” he said simply. “Not with you. I never have.”
For a moment, the air between you was heavy again, but not with tension. It was filled with the weight of everything you’d both been building for years, every unspoken truth and every quiet moment of connection that had brought you here.
You smiled, leaning into him again, your voice soft but teasing as you murmured, “Well, if that’s the case, boyfriend, you’re going to have to start calling me ‘your wife’ in front of the team.”
He chuckled, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “One step at a time,” he said, though the warmth in his tone left little doubt about where his mind had already wandered.
Life fell back into its natural rhythm after you and Hotch filed the paperwork. The team made their comments, as expected—Morgan’s teasing was relentless, and Rossi’s smug satisfaction was borderline insufferable. But beyond the ribbing, nothing really changed in the day-to-day. You and Hotch continued your routines, slipping seamlessly between work and home as if the acknowledgment of your relationship had always been there.
Except now, there was an ease to it. A clarity.
The shift became apparent not in how you treated each other, but in how the rest of the world seemed to see you. It started small—another parent at Jack’s school, someone Hotch didn’t recognize but who greeted you both warmly at pickup one afternoon.
“Oh, you must be Jack’s mom,” she said, smiling at you before turning to Hotch. “He’s such a sweet boy. It’s clear he gets it from you two.”
You both had opened his mouth to correct her out of habit, but then he stopped you. What was the point? It felt right. Natural. So he’d smiled politely and said, “Thank you.”
Later, as you walked back to the car with Jack skipping ahead, you nudged him lightly. “Jack’s mom, huh?” you teased, raising an eyebrow.
“You didn’t correct her either,” he countered, his lips twitching with amusement.
You shrugged, your smile soft. “Didn’t feel like I needed to.”
It was one of those rare sunny Saturday mornings when Hotch found himself not at the office but at the local community park with you and Jack. The three of you had fallen into an easy rhythm—Jack running ahead to the swings while you and Hotch strolled behind, coffee cups in hand.
As usual, you and Jack had dragged him into this outing, insisting he needed a break. He wouldn’t admit it aloud, but watching Jack’s laughter echo through the park and seeing the soft smile on your face made him realize how much he needed mornings like this.
While Jack climbed the jungle gym, you leaned against the railing near the benches, brushing a stray hair from your face as the breeze picked up. Hotch stood beside you, close enough that your arm brushed his when you reached for your coffee.
A voice interrupted the moment. “Aaron Hotchner, is that you?”
Hotch turned to see a woman he vaguely recognized approaching, her face lighting up as she drew closer. It took him a moment to place her—one of Haley’s old acquaintances from a distant social circle.
“It is you,” she said warmly, stopping in front of you both. “Wow, it’s been years. How are you?”
“I’m doing well,” Hotch said politely, offering a small smile. “It’s good to see you, Claire.”
Her eyes flicked to you, curiosity plain on her face. “And this must be…?”
“My wife,” Hotch said without hesitation, the words slipping out so naturally that he didn’t even think to correct himself.
You blinked, your lips twitching with amusement as you extended a hand to her. “Hi,” you said, your tone friendly but neutral. “It’s nice to meet you.”
Claire’s smile widened as she shook your hand. “It’s so nice to meet you too. And Jack! Oh, he’s grown so much,” she added, waving at him as he climbed the monkey bars.
Hotch nodded, his gaze following Jack for a moment before settling back on Claire. They exchanged a few pleasantries—updates about mutual acquaintances and polite questions about work—before she finally excused herself, leaving you and Hotch alone again.
“You told a lie,” you said after a moment, your tone casual but laced with quiet amusement.
Hotch turned to you, his brow furrowing slightly. “About?”
You raised an eyebrow, your lips curving into a faint smirk. “About me being your wife.”
He paused, the realization settling over him, and then shrugged, his expression unbothered. “Didn’t feel like I needed to call you anything different.”
“Really?” you asked, your smile widening. “Is this what we’re calling it now?”
Hotch glanced at you, his dark eyes steady but soft. “It’s what it feels like,” he said simply. “It’s what we are.”
Your breath hitched slightly, and for a moment, you said nothing, your gaze searching his. Then you let out a soft laugh, shaking your head. “Well, I guess I should get used to it, huh?”
“You’re not opposed, are you?” he asked, his voice low but tinged with amusement.
“Not in the slightest,” you replied, taking a sip of your coffee before looking up at him with a grin. “But if you keep calling me your wife in public, you’re going to have to follow through at some point.”
Hotch chuckled quietly, his lips twitching with a faint smile. “Noted.”
Jack’s shout from the swings broke the moment, and you both turned to watch him wave enthusiastically for your attention. Hotch gave a small wave back, his hand brushing against yours as he lowered it.
And just like that, the conversation shifted back to the simplicity of the morning, but the weight of what had been said lingered in the air. Neither of you felt the need to correct it. After all, it was the truth—whether there was paperwork to prove it or not.
The next instance came at work, during a meeting with another department. A young agent had introduced herself and, glancing between you and Hotch, asked, “So, you and your wife—do you find it hard balancing work and home life at the BAU?”
He didn’t miss the way your eyes flicked to him, your expression unreadable. But he also didn’t hesitate. “It’s a challenge,” he said smoothly, his tone professional but warm. “But we make it work.”
After the meeting, you leaned against the edge of his desk, your arms crossed as you smirked at him. “Wife, huh?”
“Again, would you prefer I said ‘girlfriend’?” he asked dryly, hating the juvenile label, though the corner of his mouth quirked upward.
“Not at all,” you said, tilting your head thoughtfully. “But you do realize you’ve been calling me that a lot lately.”
He shrugged, his gaze steady. “Feels accurate.”
Your smile softened, and you reached out to brush your fingers against his. “Feels accurate to me too.”
It wasn’t until one afternoon in the bullpen that the team finally confronted you both. Emily leaned against Morgan’s desk, her arms crossed as she watched you and Hotch exit his office together. She raised an eyebrow as the two of you exchanged a look and parted ways—Hotch heading toward the coffee station and you to speak with JJ.
“Alright,” Emily said, her tone laced with curiosity as she approached Hotch. “Are you and Y/N married? And don’t try to brush this off—I’ve heard you call her your wife at least three times this week.”
Hotch turned, his brow furrowing slightly. “No, we’re not married,” he said, his tone even.
Emily’s eyes narrowed, skeptical. “Then why do you call her your wife?”
He hesitated for only a moment before answering. “Because it feels more honest than calling her my girlfriend. That doesn’t seem to cover what we are.”
Emily blinked, clearly taken aback by the straightforwardness of his response. “Okay, fair point,” she said slowly. “But what’s stopping you from actually getting married?”
Hotch opened his mouth to respond, but the words didn’t come. What was stopping them? He knew it wasn’t fear or hesitation—it hadn’t been for a long time. And the thought of marrying you didn’t fill him with apprehension; it filled him with the same sense of certainty he felt when he called you his wife without a second thought.
“I—” he started, but before he could finish, you appeared at his side, holding a file.
“What’s this about?” you asked, glancing between them.
Emily grinned, her eyes flicking between the two of you. “Just asking your husband here why you two aren’t actually married yet.”
You raised an eyebrow, clearly amused, before turning to Hotch. “Well?” you asked, your voice teasing but your expression curious.
Hotch met your gaze, and for a moment, the world seemed to quiet around him. “That’s a good question,” he said, his voice steady. “What do you think?”
Your smile widened, your eyes softening as you leaned just slightly closer. “I don’t think either of us have a good reason not to,” you said, your tone light but meaningful.
Emily rolled her eyes but grinned. “Well, when it happens, let us know. Rossi’s already planning your wedding toast.”
As Emily walked away, you and Hotch exchanged a glance, your smiles matching. And for the first time, the idea of making it official didn’t feel like a question of if, but when.
The idea had been with him for weeks, lingering in the back of his mind as he watched you move through your life together. It wasn’t a sudden realization or a dramatic epiphany. It was quiet, steady, and inevitable, much like the way you’d become the most important person in his life. He didn’t need to overthink it because he already knew the answer. You were his partner in every way that mattered, and it was time to make that official.
But Hotch being Hotch, he planned every detail. Not something grand or ostentatious—that wasn’t either of you. Instead, he wanted it to be personal, grounded in the quiet, meaningful moments that had always defined your relationship.
It was a Friday evening, the end of a particularly grueling week at the BAU. You and Hotch had fallen into your routine, picking up Jack from soccer practice and grabbing takeout on the way home. The three of you sat around the dining table, laughing as Jack recounted a story about his coach’s dramatic attempt to demonstrate a bicycle kick. Hotch caught your eye during the meal, the warmth in your gaze settling something deep within him.
After Jack went to bed, you lingered in the living room, curled up on the couch with a blanket draped over your legs. Hotch joined you, sitting close enough that his knee brushed against yours. The room was quiet now, the only sound the faint hum of the dishwasher in the kitchen.
“You look tired,” you said softly, your hand reaching out to rest on his knee.
He smiled faintly, his hand covering yours. “Long week.”
“You don’t have to tell me that twice,” you replied, your lips curving into a small grin. “But at least we survived it.”
“We always do,” he said, his voice steady, though there was a weight to his words that caught your attention.
You tilted your head, your brows furrowing slightly. “What’s on your mind, Aaron?”
He hesitated for a moment, the weight of the moment pressing on him. But then he reached into his pocket, his movements deliberate but calm, and pulled out a small box. Your eyes widened slightly, and you sat up straighter, your hand still resting on his knee.
“I’ve been thinking about this for a while,” he began, his voice low but steady. “About us. About what we’ve built together. It’s not just a routine or a habit. It’s a life. And it’s a life I want to share with you—not just in words or assumptions, but in every way that matters.”
You stared at him, your lips parted slightly, but you didn’t interrupt. He opened the box, revealing a simple, elegant ring. It wasn’t flashy, but it was perfect, understated in the way he knew you’d appreciate.
“I’ve called you my wife more times than I can count,” he said, a faint smile tugging at his lips. “Because that’s what you are to me. It’s what you’ve been for a long time. And now, I want to make it real.”
His dark eyes met yours, and for the first time in what felt like forever, Aaron Hotchner let every wall fall away. “Will you marry me?”
The silence that followed wasn’t awkward or tense. It was full of the gravity of the moment, the quiet weight of a decision that neither of you had to think twice about.
Your lips curved into a smile, your eyes soft as they brimmed with unshed tears. “Of course I will,” you said, your voice steady but full of emotion. “Yes, Aaron. Yes.”
Relief and joy washed over him, a rare, unguarded smile breaking across his face as he slipped the ring onto your finger. You leaned forward, wrapping your arms around his neck, and he pulled you close, his own arms circling your waist.
It wasn’t flashy or elaborate. It was simple, quiet, and utterly perfect. Just like the life you’d built together.
Aaron Hotchner had never been a man who dreamed of grand gestures. His life had taught him the value of simplicity, of finding solace in the quiet moments that others often overlooked. And as he sat with you on the couch that night, your hand resting in his, the weight of the ring now on your finger, he realized that this was everything he’d ever wanted. No fanfare, no spectacle—just you, him, and the life you’d built together.
The days that followed felt much the same, yet somehow entirely different. There was a new ease between you, a sense of certainty that replaced the unspoken tension that had once lingered. At work, the teasing from the team was relentless but good-natured.
But it was at home, in the moments away from the chaos of the BAU, that the shift was most palpable. You’d catch Hotch watching you with a quiet intensity as you helped Jack with his homework or laughed over a shared joke at dinner. And when you teased him about it, his response was always the same—a faint smile and a simple, heartfelt, “I’m just happy.”
One evening, as you sat curled up on the couch together, Jack asleep in his room, you glanced down at the ring on your finger and then back up at him. “So, husband,” you said, the word rolling off your tongue with a mix of playfulness and warmth, “how long do you think it’ll take before Rossi starts making bets on when the wedding will be?”
Hotch chuckled softly, his hand brushing against yours. “If he hasn’t already, I’d be surprised.”
You grinned, leaning into him, your head resting against his shoulder. “Do you ever think about how far we’ve come? How all of this just… fell into place?”
He turned slightly, his arm wrapping around you as he pressed a kiss to your temple. “It didn’t just fall into place,” he said quietly. “We built it—one step at a time. And I wouldn’t change a single moment of it.”
You looked up at him, your eyes soft but filled with that familiar spark of mischief. “Not even the part where the team found out and started calling us ‘Mom and Dad’?”
He smirked, his hand trailing absently along your arm. “Not even that.”
The two of you sat there in the quiet, the glow of the lamp casting a warm light over the room. It was a life neither of you had expected, but one you’d fought for in your own way. And as Hotch held you close, the future felt less like an unknown and more like a promise—a life you’d continue to build together, one quiet, meaningful moment at a time.
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