#sorry if its confusing
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A big difference between proshippers and antis is that I feel way more comfortable around the former. And I just think it's funny that antis claim to be super wholesome, pure, accepting. When it's the complete opposite. With antis, I'd always feel extremely ashamed, embarrassed of sharing anything about my interests, even the ones they consider acceptable. I'd never talk about a fanfic I read because it contained something weird, I'd never talk about a ship because it was weird, I'd never talk about a movie or show because it was weird. I rarely ever participated in conversations about my interests online, because what if they find out I like this one thing? With proshippers tho, I was allowed to share so much, to think so many thoughts. I even became less bored because I didn't private myself from anything. I started exploring talents and artistic abilities because I was allowed to express myself the way I wanted.
So many antis say that you shouldn't feel ashamed or scared to be cringe, let yourself be, express yourself, to whatever you want to do but they will shut those who are cringe, who express and let themselves be down.
#proship#profic#this is just me ranting it doesn't even make sense anymore ugh#fuck antishippers#sorry if its confusing#proshipper safe#proshippers please interact#proshippers are welcome
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Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Information Pt.3
TW: Blood, Torture, Violence
Summary: You get rescued(finally)
Part 1, Part 2
Silent. From the moment Price had found you in that dingy cell, broken and bleeding, that was all you had been. You were silent when they moved you, though it had to have hurt with how many broken bones and lacerations you had. You were silent when the medics asked you where you were injured, how you had been hurt. You were silent through the debriefings, through the desperate attempts to find out what you had been through, what secrets you had spilled. You were silent through all of it.Â
It wasnât your fault, not really. A mental barrier you had constructed during months of torture to keep secrets from spilling, a dam built with a mantra of DONâT TALK to keep your thoughts at bay as your captors repeatedly tried to draw them out of you.Â
Even now, when the rational part of your brain knew you were safe, knew that these men, the men you served with, the men who had tracked you down and saved you, were to be trusted, the barrier would not fall.Â
Every âwhat did they want from you, what did you see, did you recognize them, how many of them were thereâ was met with silence. Anytime you opened your mouth you were hit with a wave of fear so strong it sent you into a panic attack.Â
They understood, in part. They had seen recordings, seen the rooms, seen your broken body at the time of rescue.Â
It took them 2 days to get to you after figuring out your location. They went in guns blazing, and tore the place to the ground. They split up, Price and Gaz taking the left with Soap and Ghost taking the right. They shot at anything that moved in their quest for vengeance, breaking down doors and checking every nook and cranny for where you might be locked up.Â
Price found you about a quarter of the way into the camp. He took the bottom floor and Gaz took the top as they cleared the building. He had stopped before a door that was different, metal and welded shut with a small little flap in the middle, instead of solid and wooden like the others. It took him and Gaz some prying and metalwork, but they got the door open.Â
Price almost cried when his eyes adjusted to the change in light. You lay curled in the corner, back to the wall as you shied away from the light. Your hair was tangled and matted with dried blood, your clothes were torn and dirty and your skin was crusted with so much blood and grime that he couldnât even see you underneath it.Â
âY/n?â He had called, but there was no response. He crept slowly toward you, keeping his movements as open and relaxed as possible. He crouched in front of you, taking note of your dilated pupils, sunken eyes, obviously malnourished form. He winced at the weird bulges in your skin, indicative of broken bones.Â
âSorry love.â He whispered to you, taking a steadying breath as he slid his arms under you and lifted. Hise expected you to cry out, the action no doubt causing unspeakable pain, but you didnât. In fact, you didnât react at all. He didnât dwell on it then, opting to get you somewhere safe and secure.Â
â9 broken ribs, a broken left femur, both shoulders dislocated, pneumonia, dehydration and severe malnutrition, multiple lacerations that required stitches, broken wrists, all 10 fingers broken, right kneecap dislocated, multiple concussions, and a hairline fracture on their skull.â The doctor had said. It hurt all of them to hear how badly wounded you were.Â
They gave you two weeks to recover before asking any questions. The first week you were unconscious, in a coma as your body tried to heal you. The second week you spent in worrying silence, saying nothing to anyone, not to your doctors, not to your teammates, not to your friends.
Price sent Ghost in first. He had had similar experiences and Price figured he would be able to relate. However when Ghost came storming out an hour later, slamming the door behind him, he came to regret that decision.Â
âI got over it.â He had said, âWhy canât they?â Price reminded him that not everyone responds to trauma the same way and sent him away.
Soap tried next, and came out near tears after sending you into a panic attack after calling you âLittle Birdâ. He was confused until Ghost not-so-gently reminded him of the video they had seen, of the words âPretty Birdâ being used over and over. Ghost pretended not to hear him throwing up in the toilet later.Â
Gaz tried, to no avail. He ended up just sitting in silence with you, showing you videos of his cats. He counted it a victory when your busted lips twitched into a tiny grin for a few seconds.
And on and on it went, with refusing to speak to anyone. They were losing hope until the psychiatrist finally spoke with you.Â
âGIve them time.â She said gently, âYou trying to force a response will just make this worse.âÂ
So they do. The higher-ups still want answers, of course, but Price manages to dissuade them from asking until you are out of the hospital. They spend the weeks treating you as normal as possible, stopping by to give you updates on missions, show you a video of Soap absolutely biffing it in training, tell you the latest gossip of which recruit is sleeping with who. But even though they are trying, they still handle you with kiddie gloves, afraid that the wrong word or look will make you shatter irreversibly.Â
Which brings you to now. Itâs nearly 2 A.M, and visiting hours are long over as you stand unsteadily in the bathroom, staring at your pale, pathetic form in the mirror. You open and close your mouth, trying and failing to get words out, the barrier cemented in your mind by blood and tears too strong to break down. Â
âSpeak, you stupid fucking bitch!â You scream mentally at yourself, âYou have to speak! If you donât you'll be discharged and you'll never be able to serve again! They already think youâre broken, and if you canât tell them different theyâll never treat you the same. Stop. being. So. Fucking. Pathetic.â
Tears streak your cheeks as you slide down the wall. You draw your knees up, hiding your face in them as your shoulders shake with silent sobs. Rationally, you know you are safe. Rationally, you know that if you were to speak, nothing would happen. But itâs not the rational part of your brain that is keeping you from speaking.Â
Going dark in that hellhole you were trapped in had saved your life, and you couldnât seem to get past it. Sure, not responding had almost killed you right at first, as Kravchenko became more and more ruthless in his attempts to get you to speak again, but eventually he grew bored. His little plaything had lost its sparkle, and he locked you in a cell and threw away the key as soon as he lost interest. But starving to death was still a better alternative to the all-consuming agony that had been your day-to-day.Â
And now, the subconscious, irrational part of your brain was convinced that if you spoke youâd be dragged right back and strapped to a table, that youâd wake up to find that your rescue had all been a dream. That you-
â-/n! Y/N! Y/N!â You flinch, startled out of your reverie. You look down to see rivulets of blood running down your arms, your nails having gouged holes into your skin. You look up to see the eyes of a worried nurse, holding your hands in hers.Â
âThere you are. We lost you for a minute. Do you mind letting me bandage you up here?â Her voice is soft and gentle and you find yourself nodding, letting her lead you back to your bed where she cleans and bandages your upper arms.Â
âWhat are you doing up so late sweetie?â Her voice is calming, almost hypnotic, âI mean, Iâm awake cause I get paid to be, but you should be sleeping all your injuries away, shouldnât you dearie? If I was you, Iâd of been cryinâ too, being awake at 2 A.M. for free.â She laughs, the sound echoing through the room, âCourse, I suppose you probably think Iâm crazy for agreeing to work this shift anyways. Did you know I was supposed to have this shift off? But Robertaâs kids have the flu and so I agreed-â She keeps talking, her voice soothing your fears and helping you relax. YOu canât help but mentally thank Robertaâs kids for being sick, for sending this wonderful lady who does not treat you like you're going to break at any moment to you tonight.Â
âAnd that should about do it dearie. Just press that little call button if you need any more help, alright?â She says cheerfully. She squeezes your hand and heads to the door before pausing.Â
âMake sure to get some sleep.â She leaves, gently closing the door behind her. Something about her makes you feel safer than you have since falling off that helicopter. Maybe it was her motherly demeanor, maybe it was the fact that she treated you like a normal human being, maybe it was the fact that she could have put you on a psych hold an ddin;t, but whatever it was, you loved her for it.Â
And as the door closes and the room stills, you whisper a quiet âthanks.âÂ
Part 4?
~tags~
@louthedino @scarletdfox @dangerkitten1705 @warenai @spineless-spino @rainy-darling
#cod fanfic#ghost x reader#cod x reader#simon ghost riley#angst#no beta we die like men#ghost fanfiction#john soap mactavish#cod#tf 141 x reader#call of duty#kyle gaz garrick#cod modern warfare#look I finally made anothe rpart#i'm sorry yall#should not have taken me this long but here we are#a month later#does this make sense?#I don't really know#sorry if its confusing
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I love your Star Trek relationship charts but forgive my ignorance what is QPR? Thanks!
thanks for the question anon! qpr stands for queer platonic relationship, and its definition kind of depends on whos in it. a qpr can be anything from very close best friends, to something bordering on whats usually defined as "romantic" but is mutually defined by the parties involved as "other," and anything in between. usually people in qprs are aro/acespec, but pretty much anyone can be in one.
again, theres no set definition for a qpr. but generally, its a partnership that involves love that isnt romantic and is stronger than most platonic bonds, and it usually has some degree of exclusivity like a romantic relationship.
#ask#anonymous#hope i worded that well#sorry if its confusing#qpr is a very all encompassing label and its definition depends on whos in the relationship#qpr
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noir
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk megumi#did u rly think i was gonna pass up the opportunity to draw fanart of the phanpara formalwear#sorry i see a chance to draw megumi in a suit and i jump#that being said i did debate saving this to post next month on his bday#but alas i am a slave to the immediate gratification disease#not 2 mention tht this was SO frustrating omg the similarity in tones everywhere made me want 2 hold my breath and try to die#should have picked the white dog smh i dont make things easy on myself ever#the monochrome tho.....OUgh ths th good stuff thank u phanpara i do not play but i respect u fr putting megumi in a full black suit#however.#his lapels in the official art made me want to tear my hair out i got so confused bc like/??? in th art the top folds over the bottom#but in EVERY suit cut style i could find thats not the case?? the bottom folds over the top????????#not 2 mention yuuji and gojo's suits seem to b normal its ONLY megumi tht has this anomaly of a suit#i wanted to cry so i ended up ignoring it but if someone knows smth i dont pls i need answers this has kept me awake#anyway . pupy
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HITO!!! [she/he] the purple sketches were some of the first I did of him. Every drawing since I'm slowly figuring her out :3
#sorry for the reupload i fuckywuckied the interlaced hands pose bad and gave her six fingers on one hand. ITS A HARD POSE OK I GOT CONFUSED#ANYWAYS! AUTISTIC GIRL AUTUMN CELEBRATION STILL IN FULL EFFECT DESPITE THE ARTIST'S INABILITY TO COUNT PAST FOUR đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„#poks art#anthro#avian#furry#bird#lark sparrow#poks OCs#Hito#drawing#sketch
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Drew a bunch of Marinettes in a bunch of different artists styles it was a lot of fun!!
Artists who's styles I mimicked: @buggachat @hamsternamedmarinette @ladybeug @sabertoothwalrus and @anna-scribbles all epic artists đ€đ
#my art#marinette dupain cheng#miraculous ladybug#miraculous fanart#style mimic#sorry for the @s btw#yall should go follow those artists if you dont already also#this was sort of inspired by a post the three artists on the top row made#i think they all got together and drew with one another#which is really cool#but i was genuinely confused because i mimic styles a lot#and ive seen others do it too so i was just like#wow they really know each others styles really well#until i thought about it and read their posts some more#style mimicking is really freaking fun and i think its really good practice#and a good way to explore other ways of doing things#like you really have to learn new techniques and get out of your comfort zone#also anna scribbles i could not find a recent pic of marinette in her main outfit#so thats the only marinette i drew in different clothes cuz i couldnt find a more recent ref of you drawing it#anna scribble marinette has privileges thats the others dont#but ye#i also threw my own style in there as a frame of reference to what me draw like#ive drawn marinette before just not in a loooong while#sabertooth walrus was the hardest for me to mimic cuz they have a broad range in their style#so its like which sabertooth do i wanna be in this pic#Buggachat has such a distinct style thats very clean and consistent which is amazing so they were easy#being easy or hard arent bad things either it also has to do with like styles meeting up with one another#buggachats and mine arent too too different in some shapes and aspects#so yeah itd be easier plus they drew marinette like 3 sec ago so i have more recent of a ref#as opposed to sabertooth who i have a recent ref of ladybug but not marinette so we got two diff styles in one
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đ moonpaw
#moonpaw#warrior cats#mine#ok this whole thing was originally supposed to be like âi dropped my camera in the woods & it photgraphed a feral chimera catâ#sort of concept... anyways the camera flash is supposed to show her pupils refracting the light in different ways but i totally forgot to#give any context. its late sorry if this is confusing. i hope she gets a crazy name
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uno reverse
#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#soapghost#ghostsoap#ghoap#sorry to postin so much feel like im breaking some sorta unspoken rule but i gotta or i will forget to post it at all#mw#my art#recruits in the bathroom sobbin in confusion at soaps 180 in the mornin after drills. brutal. judgmental. no remorse.#sneerin dead eyed stare he oversees em with so unforgivin and cold to minor missteps#ghost is the nice one who seems to be glowing. bc the first time he exp'd soap on a bad day he nearly had a mental break down#thinkin he did somethin to piss him off but nope soap just borrowed the stick up ghost's ass for the day#eye black smears on fingies as a treat to myself#feel like im forgettin somethin wonder what it is hmm maybe its my lack of sleep 24hrs awake thas prolly it ye
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happy pride month
#surprise. it's a bit. i actually drew the punchline earlier and was like âoh ill make up the lead in laterâ#and then the lead-in ended up being 8 pages long and semi-serious. kms. and my wrist#isat#isat spoilers#odile#siffrin#mirabelle#i want to be her best friend irl and im so serious i adore her#anyways. long post be upon ye dash again sorry#art#god i hope this one lands im worried it sucks. oh well. cant all be bangers#also this isnt the same universe or context or whatever as the other comic like this its just bits#also. the trick to getting siffrin to agree to themself being loved is to just confuse them with something else. like a dog taking a pill#long post
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i like to think that the tentacles in dungeon meshi are kinda like mushrooms or perhaps even lichens in that they are very confusing to identifty and have 200 completely different species that look very similar ("delicious brown tentacle vs BROWN DEATH TENDRIL") and you need to be an Expert to determine the difference between some of the more confusing species and some of them have like 300 different sexes and some of them are actually composite creatures composed of several different species and somehow yeast is involved and also no one really knows half of whats going on with them and in like 50 years someones gonna figure out that uhm actually these are two completely different types of tentacle creatures that arent related like at All they jusf happen to look similar and oh btw that one common house mold is actually a tentacle
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#i dont know enough about lichens to go into detail they confuse the fuck outta me#i love how the wikipedia page uses the words#'was UNDERSTOOD to be...'#'in 2016 research revealed a NEW PARTNER a yeast'#they sound like fucked up little guys#(looking at tentacle porn) huh i wonder about the scientific research on these guys#like it would explain how theres just So Many Types and its just a fucking mess every time they appear onscreen#oh sorry you thought this was a common docile soecies of tentacle that happens to be delicious but its ACTUALLY the voracious Sex Tenta
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Horrifying being beyond my comprehension just saying âno???â Is absolutely hilarious
IM GLAD YALL FOUND IT FUNNY TOO, cause drawing this killed me đ
#ask reply#sorry for everyone Iâm currently jumpscaring by posting this#ITS REALLY funny when horrors beyond comprehension act real normal#just truly confused the guy#I GOTTA draw more horror again too!#know I did it silly here but drawing these types of things is so fun
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More drawinfs <3 the usual art dump
#paper ii#oj ii#payjay#inanimate insanity#osc#ii oj#ii paper#payphone#ii mephone#mephone ii#payphone drawing is for my beloved#sorry if the context is confusing its an au where they get together (and are celebrities) and the drawing is a. tv interview situation#tacomic#microphone ii#ii microphone#taco ii#ii taco#cheesy ii#ii cheesy#knife ii#ii knife#suitcase ii#ii suitcase#theres ocs here which i hope you enjoy reading about#theres more to them though. weird awful lesbian relationship#theres a knife gijinka concept righttt at the end there#and i had a lot of fun drawing oj bathing. he hates it so much hes getting a stomachache from the soap#payjay ii#ii payjay#juice art
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i have an urge to post it here so i post it here. be normal guys
50 shades of "bill we need to stop doing old men yaoi kisses its not very good for my reputation" dude nothing will save your reputation atp.
#if youre confused about which of his eyes should stay closed me too#lets pretend he changes it for the sake of good camera ANGLE#lmao sorry#its not really handyman bill au i just drew them domestically for shit n giggles#think of the plot yourself idc#gravity falls#bill cipher#stanford pines#ford pines#billford#artists on tumblr#gravity falls art#handyman bill au#art on tumblr
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grahhhhh they multiplied
#pokemon#trainer red#trainer blue#trainer leaf#sorry if its confusing how I keep going back and forth with black haired red or brown haired red LOL#I like both.. I tend to do black hair more for the silhouette feel to it.. but I actually like the brown color more..#đâđš!
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Bit confused on your wording, but i'll try describe it; I don't feel anything. its like if other people had a folder for who they're attracted to, i just, don't have that. it can be similar for people who are aromatic too, i am in both communities, hell, i don't really feel like i got a gender either. In an attempt to avoid a tangent and confusing you any more, i do not feel anything, and like i've said, for me, its like i'm missing a folder some other people have.
Hey. So, um. Iâm trying to figure things out. Itâs not going great.
I have a question to ask asexual people. Aces? Whatever you want to be called. Can you just⊠explain what thatâs like? For reasons, itâs not exactly a good idea for me to look into it in my current environment, so⊠yeah.
Yâall, I came here to learn about myself, but not like this.
sigh
Well, Iâm here now. And Iâm entirely too unsure to be comfortable. Iâd appreciate the help.
Oh, also, because I donât know how many people this will actually reach on its own, please reblog to help me out.
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âwe want more complex wc villainsâ you cant even handle a mother who does bad things but still loves her children
#sorry still thinking abt the curlfeather discourseâŠâŠ im so confused as to why anyone would WANT her to be flat#ââough its to even the playing ground with irredeemable flat male villainsââ why should we do that??#why not give more depth to the villains⊠cmon nowâŠâŠ.#like i get the fun behind a delightfully evil motherfucker dgmw#but to argue against and lash out at people who want deeper villains is really insufferable tbh#some of you cant even handle giving rainflower a backstory.
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