#sorry for the half assed ending almost skipping over 2 decades but i feel like people know way more about recent stuff so post turn of | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

purplesurveys · 4 years ago

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What would you say is your favorite food? Sushi. < Ahhh, this is a good one. My favorite is down to a tie: it’s either chicken curry or burgers.

What color eyes does the person you like / love have? Are they pretty? Dark brown. I’m not too sure what the second question is referring to but yeah, she and her eyes are both pretty.

What was the first television show you were obsessed with? Hi-5, omg. That show was my life in preschool and I always watched the 12 NN replay as soon as I got back home from school, back when I was still on a half-day sched. I was so hooked I remember having legit tantrums before starting Grade 1 because grade school meant full days in school and thus having to miss out on the show entirely.

Do you like Mexican food or any other foreign foods? For sure. All my favorites are Asian (Indian, Japanese, Indonesian, Chinese, etc.) but I also enjoy Italian, Mexican, Greek etc cuisines. I generally haven’t tried African cuisines but I really, really want to.

What color is the keyboard you are currently using? The keys are black with white lettering.

Do you own any of those ‘chunky’ and cute rings? Nope, not my style.

What are you planning on eating for dinner tonight if you haven’t already? I saw my dad cooking up something deep-fried; it was like his own version of katsu or something, or maybe it’s fish fillet? I’m not too sure what it is yet but I’m excited and will probably eat lots of it as I skipped all my meals and have only been running on coffee and vape all day - not good.

Do you own an iPod or MP3 player? If so, when did you get it? Technically I still do. Haven’t used it since high school. I got it when I was 10 back in ‘08; I was envious of the kids in school who had iPods, so I asked my dad to buy me one even though I wasn’t super into music at the time. Not the best kid in the world.

When was the last time someone took your picture? Last Saturday when my package came. Apparently online deliveries now require your photo to be taken upon receiving your package and I think it’s for the seller to keep track of their transactions. I’m not a big fan of the new procedure, but it’s whatevs.

Would you rather write a report or type it on a computer? Type.

What color was the last jacket or hoodie you wore? Gray.

Do you receive more compliments or insults on a daily basis? Neither, really. I haven’t been talking to people a lot; and when I do it’s for work, where I receive neither compliments nor insults.

Who is the lead actress / actor from your absolute favorite movie? Audrey Hepburn and Albert Finney, or Matt Damon and Ben Affleck.

Can you recite the alphabet backward? [continued from last night] Slowly, but I’m sure I can finish it.

Do you eat chili when you get a hotdog, or do you like it plain? We don’t do hotdogs with chili here. I generally don’t see chili much where I live and I wouldn’t call it a common dish.

Would you say it’s easy for people to make you smile or laugh? At first I thought it was, but I’m slowly realizing that it isn’t.

What would you say is your favorite cereal, if you even like it? Cookie Crisp is the only one I like. I don’t have cereal often.

When was the last time you went on vacation? Where was it? It was a quick weekend getaway to Tagaytay and then Cavite, if it counts.

How many states have you been to in your lifetime? Zero.

Do you and your friends normally say you love one another? Yep, especially with Andi and Angela.

Have you ever been an outcast at your school or anywhere else? I was definitely one in early grade school, and again in Grade 6 when both my closest friends migrated in a span of six months, and I spent nearly all my lunch periods alone. Looking back on it, I’m really glad I powered through and made it here because I truly wasn’t happy at the time.

Do you own any dresses? If so, what colors are they? I have lots of sundresses and little black dresses because I was into those for a very long time at one point. Some of them are black, obviously, but I also have dresses in blue, maroon, and olive.

Would you say you drink more pop / soda than you should? I never drink soda as I’ve always felt like I spend more time complaining about how drinking it feels like burning my tongue and throat than actually enjoying it.

Would you rather have orange juice or milk with your breakfast? Water.

How many different colors has your bedroom been painted? Just one. The walls have been white ever since we moved here 12 years ago.

Do you cuss? If so, do you ever cuss in front of your parents? I’ll slip in front of them sometimes but I never get in trouble for it anymore.

Would you ever tell your mom about the things you’ve done sexually? Our humor together can be raunchy sometimes but I don’t think I’d ever do this. I dunno if she wants to hear I’ve had sex with a girl either.

Is there anyone out there who can make you cry very easily? Yes.

What was the worst news you’ve heard this entire week? *In the last week, hearing about the typhoon’s effects in other cities didn’t feel good. This entire country is literally only getting by with donations from the private sector because the government isn’t doing shit for cities and families who got severely affected by the typhoon; it’s almost depressing to hear and read about.

Have you ever been in a car wreck? I’ve been in minor car accidents but it would be too much to call any of them car wrecks. They had all just been tiny bumps or thuds.

Do you have your ears pierced? If not, what do you have pierced? Yes, my mom had my earlobes pierced when I was an infant. I don’t plan on getting any more new ones as I’m not really into piercings.

Has anyone ever told you that they think you have ADHD? Nope.

What is your biggest pet peeve? When people reach out first via text/IM then even if I get back to them in 5–10 seconds, it takes them a long time to get back to me. It’s especially annoying if they classify it as urgent, I drop everything to reply quickly, then they end up disappearing. Like why?

Do a lot of people understand you completely? Who does exactly? No, I like keeping a wall up.

Would you say you’re really good at cooking and baking things? Haha no. But it’s something I want to be skilled in, definitely. I’d love to be able to make the food I usually just thirst over on the internet. I’m taking baby steps, like figuring out how to make certain sandwiches, but I have a long way to go before I can consider myself any good.

How is the weather outside right this second? It’s been a little cloudy this morning but it might start to get fair seeing how I’m beginning to see the sky turn blue. I’m just hoping there won’t be too much sun, period.

Do you have a lot of trees around your house? What about buildings? No buildings as I live in a gated village. We have a number of trees around, but I wouldn’t call it ‘a lot.’

Would you say either one of your parents are 'pack-rats?’ No. I have that title, and I believe I inherited it from my great-grandmother who was a bit of a pack rat herself, as I’ve been told.

Have you ever disowned anyone in your family? For what reasons? Kinda. I don’t associate with one of my uncles because he has a terrible drinking issue that he never got to permanently fix. Whenever I see him at family gatherings he just smells like stale gin or whatever it is he drinks, and it just ruins the essence of family reunions for me. As recent as Christmas Day last year he drove drunk and crashed into a car with an entire family, but as always his ass got lucky because 1) no one in the family got hurt, and 2) said family let go of the lawsuit they were planning to file against him.

Have you ever seen That 70’s Show? Do you watch it regularly? I tried watching the first episode but genuinely could not find it entertaining for the life of me. Sorry, Mila :(

If you could choose, what decade would you rather live in? I never really think about revisiting decades - they’re already behind, so what’s the point? As bad as the 2020s have been looking, I’m okay with staying here.

How often would you say you get sick? Once a year at most.

Is there anyone out there who has hurt you so much, you wish they’d die? I used to wish they would die, but I don’t feel that way anymore.

Has anyone ever called you a socio-path before? I don’t think so.

When was the last time you watched a movie in theaters? December.

Have you ever moved to a completely different state before? We’ve moved to different regions before.

Do you mind it when surveys ask you really personal questions? No. Isn’t that part of the point of surveys?

When was the last time you told someone you love them? Thursday or Friday I think, when Andi said it to me first and I said it back. I wasn’t having a good day and they were just looking out.

Which one would you like more: kiss on cheek / kiss on neck? Depends on my mood. Right now a kiss on the cheek sounds nice.

Does it bother you when people steal your stuff on MySpace? This never happened to me because I had Myspace for such a short time and I never caught it at its peak. Also, how do people steal your stuff over there? That’s pretty intriguing lmao

Do you have freckles? Do you like / dislike them? I don’t have any.

Who would you say is the best actor / or actress in your opinion? My biased ass would rally for Kate Winslet all the way, but some other great ones for me are Toni Collette, Emma Stone, Jodie Foster, and Natalie Portman.

How many times have you been drunk in your life? Many.

What would you do if the last person you kissed said they hated you? Be confused and ask them to give me a few concrete reasons. I don’t think too highly of myself, but I know I’ve never done anything to make me deserving of hate, especially with regard to us.

Do you ever think you might be pregnant? No, it has never been a worry of mine.

When was the last time you acted really immature? The weekend.

Do you enjoy watching comedies or horror movies more? Horror. I never watch comedies and the only subtype of it that I watch is romcom.

As a child, did you ever have an imaginary friend? Yeah but it lasted all of five minutes until I got bored with the concept.

Does anyone call you baby? Who would that be? No.

Can you rely on one or more people to take up for you? I have no idea what take up means. If this also means ‘stand up for me,’ then yeah I can.

#survey #surveys

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daincrediblegg · 5 years ago

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As Time Goes By (1/2)

Pairing: Arthur Fleck x Co-worker!Reader Word Count: 1803

Author’s Note: Lmao so I’m deadass 3 days late with this, but I got inspired for it literally on New Years Eve, and it’s been running away from me ever since (mostly ‘cause I actually came down with a pretty bad infection, and now I’m apparently allergic to the antibiotic the doctors gave me for it. It’s not been fun the last few days). Here it is now in its final form (split into 2 parts for my own sanity and yours), and with it, I thank you all for coming in at the butt end of 2019 and playing a big part in saving my ass. All your fanfic, all your art and acceptance of mass mutual love for this boy, and whether you’ve reblogged and liked or commented on my art or what little writing I’ve done or even my dumbass tag meta, I’m incredibly humbled and screaming about it literally all the time, and I love you all. Hope to talk to more of you in 2020 to keep the clown love going strong, and I’ll see you all very soon for part 2 ;)

Arthur hadn’t really believed it when he’d been invited.

In his 33 years of life he had hardly ever been invited to anything. Birthdays, Christmas parties, dinners, drinks. If he had been offered any of these occasions, he’d often be forced to turn them down. He could justify to himself that he’d hate to leave his mother alone on any given holiday (let alone any day, with how poor her health was), but deep down, he felt the gesture empty. If he went, he’d be no more than he already was- an invisible man. Nobody to talk to, nobody to really celebrate with despite festivity cascading all around him. All because nobody really wanted the freak there anyway. Why go to all the trouble when he could be far more comfortable at home alone instead?

But when Gary had approached him one sunny Gotham winter morning as he was buttoning his golden vest, and said that the rest of the guys were planning to go to a bar on Nolan and 3rd to celebrate the New Year, he actually thought about going.

He was sweet to do so. Always nice to him. He’s sure the other guys wouldn’t think to extend such a courtesy to him, let alone want to. He knew what they thought of him, and frankly he didn’t think too highly of spending more time with them either. He was ready to make his usual excuse- that meds needed to be picked up, that his mother needed tending.

But it was four little words that Gary had said- soft enough and potent enough to make him reconsider.

“She’ll be there too.”

His eyes find her almost immediately, and Gary’s eyes follow- by the vanity, where she tugs down her wig to cover her hair- bright red spun yarn, dressed in a pair of braids. Her fluffy underskirt poking out a brilliant white under her blue polka-dot dress as she leans closer to the mirror.

She’s lovely. Always has been. In and out of makeup. Always wishing him a good day, laughing at his jokes. She even asks for them- on days when she drags her feet up that long staircase, tired eyes hoping all the more that whatever he has for her will do the trick that he loves best- a smile, no matter how soft, and a chuckle, whether it leaves her chest or not. Anything is enough for him.

He knows he’s going, deep down. He knows it surely as his heart starts thudding against his fragile ribs just a little harder as she smoothes her hands down her plush skirt.

“I-... I’ll think about it.” he concludes softly.

“All right. I hope you will. It’d be good to see you there, mate.”

They share smiles- genuine ones, before Gary gets back to his locker, dragging out his own jacket and wig. Just then, he sees a flash of pastel blue flutter past him, and his eyes flit up to her face, full of warmth as she waves a gentle goodbye to him.

“Have a good day, Artie.”

Chills shoot up his spine in a rush. A hit of joy. An impossible wish, but one spoken true all the same. He wonders if there’s invisible cherubs behind him, stabbing him with arrows.

Arthur lifts his hand, wiggling his fingers weakly as he smiles back at her.

“Have a good day…” he repeats.

Her smile gets wider before she turns her attention to the dwarf next to him.

“You too Gary.”

“And you!” he shouts after her, as she finally picks up her bag and trots down the stairs. He knows his eyes aren’t the only ones on her when she leaves, but he hopes that his eyes are more important than most.

“How come she never tells me to have a good day?” Randall quips with a shrug. Gary rolls his eyes as he turns to him in reply.

“Maybe because you’re an arse-hole.”

He laughs at that. Neither the laugh he pushes out of himself for courtesy, or the ones that force themselves out and choke him. He laughs for real, and he knows he’s going.

He has to.

His mom is nodding off, thank God.

She’s been fed, and they’ve watched a bit of the Live Gotham New Years Celebration coverage on TV- Murray Franklin, hosting- from her bed. The lights are out, save for the soft blue glow of her TV, and it’s just enough of a sleeping potion to start putting her under. She always gets like this, in truth. Out cold long before the night really has a chance to even begin. It’s a blessing, really. Especially tonight.

Because it gives him plenty of time to get ready.

Sure, he doesn’t have much of a choice in what suit he wears- the only one he owns being a deep maroon, a hand-me-down from the last decade. He can’t decide how to style his hair (though he’s bathed, he’s at least managed that much, for her), whether to slick it back or keep it casual, all he has in the way of cologne is something cheap he got from the drug store on his way home from work the day Gary invited him, but he’s got the spirit. For Her. And it seems that today, it’s enough.

He gathers the necessaries from the closet before he leaves his mother to sleep, switching the tv in the living room onto the special while he prepares, dabbing the cologne to his wrists and neck, wiggling his spindly legs into his suit pants on the couch.

Just then, as he’s buttoning up his fly, the brief commercial break ends with a quick jazz sting from the band- moved all the way downtown just for this occasion. He watches as the comedian approaches a couple. Arm in arm in the snow and smiling like they’ve won the lottery. Murray quips of how happy they are, about his own relatively new wife and how it won’t last- all in good humor. But he can’t register any of it.

All he registers is the way the woman’s hands move around that man’s waist. He feels it himself. On him. Faint. A warm hand wrapping around him, just under his jacket, grazing over the deep blue sweater he’d dragged on this morning to go to therapy, fitting so neatly in the space between his hips and his ribs. It’s uncanny. It feels just like her.

And for just a moment the couple on the screen is gone. Replaced by another, far more handsome than the last.

Him and her. Together. Happier than the thousands of handmade smiles they paint on themselves with rich pigments in cheap grease. Hers is particularly divine. Her cheeks rosy as they lift fully to accommodate her joy. It makes his heart want to break his bones, leap right out of his chest, into the palm of her hand of its own accord.

And they remained that way. For hours. Gotham’s imposing buildings shrinking beneath the way they look at each other, hold each other close and not just for the inevitable warmth her body brings to his. And at the stroke of midnight, he pulls her impossibly close, cupping her face when he kisses her, the cold air melting away under their shared warmth as confetti falls around them with the snow. They even get on the kiss cam.

Gotham sweethearts. And everyone knows it.

He smiles, as the saxophone slowly pulls him out of reverie. The chilling blue light of the tv washes over him, and his hand pulls itself agonizingly from the spot it found across his abdomen, feeling his rib sticking out in his laid-back position. Murray, bundled up in scarf and woolen coat, speaks loud and clear into his microphone over a cheering crowd, ever the professional.

“Well folks, this is it! Not much more than an hour left until the New Year! Pour some Champagne, and get your sweethearts close, and we’ll be right back after these messages.”

Panic washes over him so fast he almost tumbles over the coffee table trying to get up off the couch.

He’s late.

Quicker and more lithe than a cat high on their nip, he tugs his sweater off, buttoning up his clean white dress shirt as fast as he can- praying he didn’t skip any buttons, or that he improperly tied his tie.

“Happy? Where are you going?” a sleepy lilt calls from behind him.

He almost yelps, but before he can he turns to see his mother, leaning against the hallway, looking like she could pass out again right then and there. Leaving his waistcoat not fully buttoned, pulling his suit jacket on, he strides over to her and supports her sleepy form, starting to try and lead her back to bed.

“I’m meeting some guys from work for a drink.” A half-lie, as they reach the bedroom door. Enough to not make her question why he’s dressed to the nines and the strong and heady scent coming off of him - discount eros from a bottle. She hums a little “oh”, mulling over what she should say in response. He doesn’t give her the chance.

“I’m sorry Mom, I forgot to tell you.” Another half-lie, but it completes a full truth for her, letting him keep the solitary thought of her all to himself, even for a little while longer.

A look of unnecessary worry strikes across Penny’s face.

“You shouldn’t drink, Happy. It could mess with your pills. And you know I don’t like you being out this late.”

He winces at that. Guilt hitting him like needles prodding his veins. It isn’t much, but it’s enough to hurt. That she doesn’t trust him to leave and make it back in one piece. That she doesn’t trust him to know himself.

That she doesn’t trust him.

But she can’t dissuade him now.

They reach the door to her room, and they both slink in. He lets go of her once he’s sure she can make it the rest of the way to her side of the bed by herself, and swipes up his old hoodie draped over the corner that isn’t hers.

“I’ll be home by next year, I promise.” He purses his lips with a playfully disarming smile for her. She gives him a breathy chuckle of acceptance, and sits back on her bed again, pulling up the covers as she does.

“All right, Happy. Be careful.”

He nods, tugging the hoodie over his suit- trying not to wrinkle the sleeves as best he can.

“I will, Ma.”

He blows a kiss, and before she even has the chance to give him one back, he’s picked up his wallet and keys, and he’s out the door, locking it behind him.

#arthur fleck x reader #joker x reader #arthur fleck fanfic #arthur fleck imagine #lmao part 2 is juicy and will come out when I'm not chaining benadryl to get rid of the nasty hives I've got now #might even be a smutty part 3 but only if people want it.#I love my fluff but I certainly wouldn't be opposed #joker 2019 #joker imagine #also lmao pls my dms and inbox are always open please come talk I'm just really bad at initiating shit #'cause I'm just a shitty anxious baby #my writing #fanfiction

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nomorelonelydays · 6 years ago

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kick your pretty feet up on my dash

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 – It’ll Be

Header made by the lovely @withlovefromfeona

Sidney thinks he could’ve stood there for an eternity.

Samantha coughs from the side, a little impatiently. “Sid,” she says, her eyebrows raised as she glances at Geno.

“Oh! Oh, I—here. Have a nice day.” He tapes the cupcake box shut and hands it over to her, and she leaves the store with the bell jingling behind her.

Geno turns his head to watch her go, conflicted and almost worried. “She’s—”

“Customer,” Sidney says quickly. “Samantha. PTA President.”

“PTA—” Geno repeats, confused. “Like, school?”

“Yeah, there’s an elementary school here,” Sidney says, then feels like a dummy. There’s an elementary school in every town. “Geno, that photo—”

“Sidney, did Samantha leave yet?” Deidre calls from the kitchen. He hears her footsteps get closer. “If she tries to give me more advice on how to make my cupcakes, I swear I’ll—” She stops abruptly at the sight of Geno, her expression morphing into back neutral politeness. “Oh, hello! Welcome! I’m Deidre. How can I help you, handsome?”

Oh, God. “Dee, this is—”

Geno’s already extending his hand. “I’m Geno. Nice to meet.”

Her eyes widen. “You’re Geno? Sidney’s Geno?”

Sidney’s face feels like it’s on fire. “He’s not—”

“Sidney, why don’t you take Geno around the block to that ice cream place on First? I can handle the shop by myself for the rest of the day.”

“It’s okay, he’s just—”

“Ice cream, Sid,” she insists, ushering him out from behind the counter. “Show him the ice cream store.”

Deidre’s already waving at them from inside the store when she successfully maneuvers both Sidney and Geno out on the street. Ice cream store, she mouths at them with a grin, pointing helpfully to their right.

Sidney sighs and looks up at Geno with a ‘what can you do?’ expression. “Let’s go to the ice cream store then.” Geno used to demolish milkshakes when they were both rookies anyways, out late at some fast food chain that he convinced Sidney to go to past curfew. He’d probably enjoy this.

“I love ice cream,” Geno says earnestly, without taking his eyes off Sidney.

Geno orders cookies and cream, two scoops in a cone, with a healthy drizzle of chocolate sauce and extra crushed Oreos. Sidney opts for vanilla, no toppings, in a cup. It almost feels like the date they never had (the same one Sidney has on replay in his mind on lonely afternoons as he walks home from the bakery), if Geno ever liked him the way Sidney liked him.

“Boring,” Geno says, chasing the dripping ice cream by plastering his mouth against the waffle cone. He looks like a walrus. “They have ice cream with four colors.”

“Neither of us are twenty anymore,” Sidney says, halfheartedly digging into his cup. “Besides, I don’t work out like I used to, and—wait, you shouldn’t be eating this either. I know that’s not on your diet plan.”

“I’m on vacation,” Geno teases. “Let me have fun.”

“It’s in the middle of the season.”

“Like I say, no game until Frid—”

“I know, G. But—” Sidney’s fingers drum lightly against the table, mostly because he doesn’t know what else to do. “You skipped town in the middle of the week. Does anyone know?”

Geno remains quiet, confirming his suspicions.

“Oh my God, G, you can’t��”

“It’s just quick trip, one day, be back soon.” He looks like a scolded child—petulant in spite of everything. “I want to see you.”

“You could’ve seen me after the season,” Sidney says gently. “You know I’ll always be here.” For you, he thinks, but what ends up coming out of his mouth is, “In Oregon.”

Geno stews over this. “Why you pick Oregon?”

“I figured The Oregon Trail was a thing for a reason,” he tries, but the reference must’ve flown over Geno’s head. He shrugs. “I don’t know. I—I really don’t know.”

Because it had been the farthest place he could think of. Because he needed time away from Pittsburgh, where he’d fell in love and gotten his heart torn up like tissue paper, even though it’s been on his mind like a piece of gum stuck in the crevices of his sole the last few months.

“You could have stayed. Penguins always need you.”

“I couldn’t. It’d—it’d be too much.”

Geno looks slightly alarmed. “Too much for knee?”

“No, I—” He lowers his gaze and concentrates on the ice cream mash his cup is holding. “It’d just be too much. I wanted to play. I still want to play. I think about what it’d be like if I didn’t have to retire, every day.”

“Sid.” Geno sounds devastated, and it’s all Sidney can do to keep from falling to pieces as he ducks his head lower. “Sid, I’m so sorry.”

“Me too.” He blinks several times, taking a deep exhale. “But. But I’m not unhappy with how things turned out. You deserve to be Captain, you really do.”

“I’m not kidding when I say I miss you,” Geno mumbles. “Like, when something new happening, I find new restaurant that open, I think how much you love it, but you’re already gone. Or sometimes after we lose, you know, drive home and halfway I realize I’m head to your house.”

Sidney lets out a sharp breath. “Geno—why didn’t you tell me this before? You could’ve—on the phone—”

Geno’s free hand is clenched like he’s restraining himself. “Tried to, but I’m scared. It’s big change, I know it’s big change, but then it really happen and you already settle in, have bakery, have...secret admirers, have happy life after hockey. So I just think, okay, no more room for me. So. It’s okay.”

“G, Oregon’s not keeping me hostage,” Sidney croaks. “I would’ve come back to visit if you asked. And there’s always room for you.”

“But I don’t want just visit. I want—” The topmost scoop of his ice cream decides to fall with a disappointing plop on his lap at that point, and Geno jerks away like he’s been scalded. “Oh, fuc—”

“Oh my God.” He starts throwing napkins at Geno, and Geno dabbing uselessly at his ripped, probably $500 jeans while trying to mouth at the rest of his ice cream cone to save it is so ridiculous that Sidney starts giggling despite himself. “I’m sorry—I’m not—I’m not laughing at you. It’s—God, I’m sorry, I need a minute—”

But Geno’s laughing too.

“I miss hear this,” Geno says. “I miss your laugh.”

It comes out easily, like he’s just stating another fact. The sky is blue. The earth is round. He misses Sidney’s laugh. Misses Sidney himself, even.

“Come on.” He pushes his chair back, grabbing his empty cup and stuffing the dirty napkins inside. “Let’s go to my place. You can borrow my pants.”

Geno gives him a dubious glance. “You think I fit?”

“You’re such an ass. You can take my sweatpants or go back to the airport in your underwear.”

They walk side by side down the avenue, with Sidney pointing out the sights along the way, from the candy store with its dusty, thousand-year-old taffy and the abandoned 1950s hole-in-the-wall lounge that is supposedly haunted. Geno nods along the whole time, like Cardwell’s town history genuinely fascinates him. Sidney shoves his hands deep in his pockets and ignores how Geno’s arm keeps brushing against his, and how much he wants to reach out and grab it.

“You’re flying back tomorrow, right? We can just toss it in the washer and I’ll have it ready for you tomorrow. Unless you can’t tumble dry it.” He knows all about Geno’s eclectic fashion choices, and he’s learned early on to just not ask. “I mean, I can mail it back to you when it finishes drying?”

“Sid, always think so much,” Geno tells him with a smile. “Gotta be Captain here too.”

“Old habits die hard,” he says, rolling his eyes. “Here give me your jeans. Oh—”

He turns around, and Geno is much closer than he’d expected. Even though he still towers over Sidney, he makes for a mournful sight in his ruined pants and airplane-wrinkled button-up.

“What’s wrong?”

“I—” Geno’s still staring at his feet. “You just tell me and I go back Pittsburgh, okay, Sid? Won’t bother you anymore. But want to know if biggest reason you move here because you don’t want to see me anymore. It’s okay if—if that’s why. Tanger say that you want to get away, that you told him it’s too much be here in the city. I just want to know if it’s me so I—”

“Geno, no.” His feet may as well have been rooted to the ground. “I mean, yes it was too much. And maybe it was also because of you—but not because I hated you. I—I could never hate you.”

Geno remains silent.

“Did you think it was because of you the whole time?”

He shrugs, a small, uncertain motion. “You leave so fast. Don’t tell me until you already packed, but Flower knows about you move. And Tanger, and Phil, and Jake and baby Pens. Call less and less, think maybe is how you say you done.”

Sidney takes a faltering step towards Geno, then another, until he’s close enough to dare to reach for Geno’s wrists. Geno looks up then, eyes red-rimmed like he’s bracing for the worst.

“I left because I liked you,” Sidney says, his voice raw. He then amends, quickly, because ‘like’ isn’t enough to describe what he’s always felt about Geno. “I love you. And I was selfish. I didn’t want to stay because I knew you didn’t love me like that, and I didn’t want to wait for you to tell me that you didn’t need me anymore. So. I just. I don’t know. I ran, I guess.”

“Sid. Sid.” Geno’s shaking his hands free from Sidney’s grasp, and Sidney takes half a step back as his heart plummets to his feet. But he’s only raising them to cup Sidney’s face, running his thumb tenderly across his cheek. “Sid, you—I always need you.”

And he very, very carefully places a kiss on Sidney’s open mouth.

“Sid?” Geno asks, when Sidney’s remains stock-still after he pulls back. “Sid, you—”

“Kiss me again,” he says, his arms snaking around Geno’s shoulders—he needs to touch—something, anything. “Kiss me now.”

Geno wastes no time in complying, too dazed to come up with anything snarky. He kisses Sidney like he’s been holding back for years, maybe even decades. Sidney’s fingers are tangling themselves in his hair and the moment he feels Geno’s arms under his ass, he jumps like he’s going for a celly, his thighs clinging to Geno’s waist.

“Shit—oh, fuck—” He knows he’s not light, but Geno only stumbles for a bit, pushing Sidney against the wall to right himself as he seals his mouth against Sidney’s neck. “Oh my God—oh my God—”

“I see photo,” Geno says hoarsely. “Flower send Instagram, and I see, think, I hope so much, want it to mean what I think so bad—”

“Yes, yes.” His brain is definitely melting at this point, and suddenly Geno’s jeans are impossible to unbutton. It’s fucking terrible. “Take your stupid ice cream pants off.”

Geno looks like he wants to say something about that, but Sidney quickly follows up with, “I want to blow you,” and it visibly seems like every single rational thought is flying out of Geno’s head.

He leads Geno down the hall and practically drags him onto the mattress. Geno’s stubble grazes against the soft part of his neck, trailing down to his collar, then chest as he mouths at his nipple, and Sidney knows he’s going to fucking regret the burn the next day but it’s so, so good and all he can think of is holy shit, this is really happening.

Sidney wouldn’t even categorize himself as out of practice. He’s pretty much never had a hands-on experience, because the NHL is so generous with providing him the privacy and support to do so. He feels like he’s skating blindfolded, headfirst into nowhere as he pulls down Geno’s waistband. But he knows what he likes, he’s seen enough videos to make it up as he goes along, so he sinks to his knees and takes as much of Geno as he can in his mouth, alternating between kitten licks and slow, long stripes from the base. His entire body feels like it’s shaking because for once, he doesn’t know what he’s doing. He only knows that he wants to touch and keep touching, knows the familiar thudding of his heart thundering loudly against his ribcage that he’s sure Geno must hear it. But Geno’s eyes stay closed, his hands gripping the sheets as he tries his best to breathe through his nose.

“Wait, wait,” Geno says suddenly. “Fuck, I’m close.”

Sidney hums, swirling his tongue on the tip of Geno’s cock until Geno pushes him off.

“Need minute—” He looks like he’d tumbled off two hills in a row. He thumbs at Sidney’s reddened mouth with a shaky hand, mesmerized. “Sid. Holy shit. Sid. You look—”

He probably looks like a mess. But Geno cups his face almost reverently, like he’s fragile.

“Look so gorgeous,” he says, like it’s simply the truth. “Always look so good.” Then he must’ve noticed that Sidney’s still achingly hard, his dick straining in his underwear and leaking against the fabric. “Up, up.”

“But you didn’t—”

“I take care of you,” Geno says, one hand reaching out to fumble blindly in the nightstand drawer. “Where’s—”

He really just wants Geno’s hands on him, anywhere, so he guides them, wrapping both their fingers around his already sensitive cock until Geno gets into a rhythm and all the noises Sidney can make is shallow gasps against Geno’s neck.

“Is this good?” Geno asks. He may as well have been fucking talking to Sidney from Mars. “Tell me what to do.”

“I—sometimes I like it—with my fingers. Inside,” Sidney pants out. He fishes the lube out from the drawers for Geno. “Geno, please—”

“Jesus.” Geno makes another hitching noise. “What you want?”

“Want you in me,” Sidney manages.

He lets out an embarrassing whine when Geno’s hands leave, but Geno’s only flipping them so Sidney’s on his back. He thinks he hears the condom wrapper crinkling. “Sidney, can I—”

“Yes, yes, yes.” He hooks one leg around Geno’s waist, his arms pulling Geno down by his shoulders desperately. “Hurry up.”

The rest is a blur. Geno’s fingers are bigger than he had expected, the feeling electric when he crooks them and hits a particularly delicious spot and better than when he does it himself. Geno lets Sidney ride himself silly on his hand until Sidney grows frustrated with his own clumsy back-and-forth. He’s never had more than two, three fingers in him, but he sinks down on Geno’s cock, inch by inch, until he’s stretched and wet and full to the brim, until it feels like he’s swallowed the sky. It’s all he can do to squirm on Geno’s lap without losing his mind.

“Sid, Sid,” Geno says, his mouth against Sidney’s shoulders as he presses the hundredth, thousandth kiss on Sidney’s skin. “Love you, Sid.”

“Do you have to go?” Sidney says, whispering even though it’s only the two of them. He’s tucked in Geno’s arms, and every once in a while, he makes as if to move so Geno’s limbs don’t fall off, but Geno refuses to let go. “No games until Friday, right?”

“I’m tell Tanger you say that. Sidney Crosby say is okay for Captain to not go to practice, it’s okay not win Cup this year,” Geno teases, but he’s also grimacing at the prospect of leaving the bed. He nuzzles in, planting a tender kiss on Sidney’s shoulder. “Don’t want to go.”

“I want another Cup,” Sidney says stubbornly, mostly because he knows it’ll make Geno laugh.

It does. But Geno sobers quickly.

“Come back to Pittsburgh with me.”

Six months ago, if Geno had asked him the same question, he would’ve agreed in a heartbeat.

“And leave Dee to fend off Samantha by herself? She’ll never forgive me.” He sighs. “But I don’t want you to go back and forg—”

He stops short, biting his lips. He’s waited so long already.

“I’ll come back.” It’s heavy, the way Geno says it. Like it’s more than a promise. “I come back in June and stay the whole summer.”

“You’ll be here for the 4th of July Carnival Bash then.”

Geno squints. “The what?”

“It’s a Cardwell Point thing. There’s fireworks and games. Apparently they’ll also bring in a Ferris wheel, but I don’t know how safe portable Ferris wheels are.”

“You not American.”

“Yeah, but I think I’m an honorary Cardweller now. Cardwellite. Cardwelly?” he grumbles. “Besides, I want to—never mind.”

“What?” A grin starts to bloom as he squeezes Sidney’s hips. “What you want?”

“Hey, quit it. I wanted to—I mean, I don’t know, I thought it might be fun to—”

“Come on, Sid,” Geno coaxes, his fingers dancing on the curve of Sidney’s waist.

“I wanted to make out with you when the fireworks go off,” he mutters, his words stringing together. “It’s a thing. It’s stupid. Forget I said it.”

But Geno only kisses him, his lips like honey. “Okay. No problem. And if I miss fireworks, guess have to bring Cup here, kiss you in front of that instead.”

“Okay,” Sidney says. His heart feels too full, and he wants to keep feeling like this into the next century. “It’s a deal.”

“What else you want do?” He brushes Sidney’s stray curl behind his ear. “Before I go back.”

“Dinner,” he decides, tangling his legs with Geno’s and rubbing their calves together. “But then I want to come back here.”

He wants to do everything with Geno. And for the first time in his life, he thinks he can.

The next morning, he sends Geno back to the airport with a full cheesecake. (Deidre doesn’t even bat an eyelash when Geno pre-orders three other specialty cakes—except for The Jack; he’d wrinkled his nose at the name—to be shipped to Pittsburgh.)

“Make sure rookies don’t take,” Geno promises.

“Be nice,” Sidney says against Geno’s mouth, when Geno kisses him goodbye for the fifth time in the car. “You should share with them.”

“Is my cake. Literally have my name.”

Geno ends up accidentally leaving the cake out in the dining nook for approximately fifteen minutes, when he gets called away by the coaches for an impromptu meeting. It gets demolished in less time than that, when a lone rookie coming back from the trainer’s room spies it and alerts five other players and an intern on the PR team. According to Tanger’s amused text, Geno had sulked for literal hours.

“Only save one slice,” he mopes on the phone. “Turn my back and is gone.”

“Guess you have to come back for more,” Sidney smiles, not feeling very sorry at all.

The Penguins make it into the playoffs. It’s a good start to April.

“What if we made little Stanley Cup cookies,” he suggests to Deidre. “To show support.”

“I don’t know if people here will get it,” Deidre says. “But we can.”

No one in Cardwell Point gets it. Samantha from PTA buys three when she hears that the design had been Sidney’s idea, but she calls them ‘the little Harry Potter goblet biscuits.’

He’s trying to take a photo of a half-eaten cookie for Geno when Deidre asks, “So do you just watch hockey or do you actually play?”

“Oh, yeah, used to. All the time,” Sidney says, pressing send. “I played for the Pittsburgh Penguins. I was the Captain.”

Deidre rolls her eyes. “That’s funny. Because I also played for the Penguins as the Captain.”

“I knew it.” Sidney grins, barely managing to dodge the towel when she swats it at his arm.

(Two days later, a 15-year old tourist wanders into the store to buy a cookie and nearly drops all of his quarters when he realizes exactly who is giving him his change.

“Are you Sidney Crosby?” the boy squeaks. “Penguins Sidney Crosby?”

He can’t hold in his laughter when he sees the moment Deidre connects the dots and her jaw drops).

Deidre is Sidney’s unofficial date to the May neighborhood potluck. She begrudging makes just one chocolate cherry cake due to popular demand, but she complains the whole time.

It’s more fun that he’d anticipated—small talk, good beer, friendly faces, and just the right amount of whispered gossip over Samantha’s bake sale blunder involving store-bought scones pretending to be homemade. He also ends up offering babysitting services to about three separate families. It’s easy to imagine the rest of retired life being well, as easy as this.

He can’t wait to share it with Geno.

Sidney has one of the neighborhood kids, Sharon, in his arms. She’s busy chatting his ear off about her favorite animals at the lake (“Squirrels, but not gooses. They chase me and they got teeth and they’re too big.”) when someone taps Sidney’s shoulder.

“Hey,” the man says. He has a nice, shy smile when Sidney turns to him. Behind them stands three guys in a huddle near the drinks table, whispering among each other with big grins and giving them thumbs-ups for some reason. “Uh, I don’t think we’ve met yet. I’m Jeremy.”

Sidney blinks. “Oh. Oh!”

So there’s that.

“I’m exhausted,” he tells Geno on the phone later that evening. “Samantha kept making me eat her potato salad. How’d the game go today? Sorry I missed half of it.”

“Wait, wait, go back.” It’s hilarious when Geno’s voice actually squeaked when Sidney mentioned that Jeremy is, in fact, a real person. “You meet stalker?”

“He’s not a stalker. He’s nice. He teaches middle school.”

Geno is clearly distressed. “And what happen?”

“Don’t you want to hear about Samantha’s potato salad?”

“Sidney.”

“Okay,” he laughs. “We just talked a little bit. He’s from a small town in Texas. He asked me if I wanted to get coffee. Doesn’t know hockey. He likes dogs, has a corgi named Biscuit.”

“Wait—”

“Then Deidre comes in and says, ‘Sidney’s boyfriend loves hockey.’ She’s had half a margarita. I think the whole backyard heard her. And then Samantha dropped her potato salad, but that might’ve been someone else.”

“Sid,” Geno groans. “I fly out tomorrow.”

“You are literally in the middle of playoffs. Do not come here.”

Deidre confirms that Samantha had been, in fact, the one who dropped the potato salad. But no one had really thought it a shame.

Geno shows up at Sidney’s front door exactly three days after the season ends. The Cup won’t arrive in Oregon until a month or two later, but Sidney surprises himself when he realizes that he could care less.

“Told you I come back in time,” Geno says, when he finally pulls back from kissing the breath out of Sidney. “I make you something”

It’s only then that Sidney notices the box Geno is holding. He pops the lid open, revealing a round, lumpy, very homemade thing that apparently had gotten an extra generous sprinkling of powdered sugar.

“Um, wow.” Sidney swallows, because otherwise he’s sure whatever is trying to bubble up his throat will just float right out of him, light as clouds, clear as bells, so the entire town, from Deidre to Samantha to Biscuit the Corgi, can see just how impossibly happy he is. “You really made it snow here.”

“Apple sharlotka. Is cake,” Geno tells him. “I call it The Sidney.”

And. Well. How can he not kiss Geno again?

So he does, pulling Geno down by his lapels so he can press his lips against Geno’s once more, slow and sweet and unapologetically indulgent like cheesecake, right on his front porch in Cardwell Point.

@DeesBakeryCafe

Lord Stanley’s come to Cardwell Point! Come by for a free Stanley Cup(cake) today from 1 – 2 PM, made by our very own Sidney Crosby (yes, that Sidney) and another special guest 👀

End

#retirement fic #theres dicks in this one guys #also can you tell how much I'm in love with the header #im crying you guys #thanks for sticking with me on this 3 part fic!!!!#maybe we can do timestamps for all the moments I wasn't able to fit in it #WHATEVER here just take it #typos and OOC and all #i'll fix it later

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kvndeathmusic · 5 years ago

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my favorite records of the 2010s pt 1 (the less great stuff/honorable mentions)

Neither this post or its followup are going to be in any particular order, however all the records I talk about here are, in my opinion, not as good as the records i will talk about in my part 2. they’re all fantastic but these ones slightly a little less fantastic than the ones in my “top 10″. none of this is based on stuff like 'influence' or whatever other critics base their lists on, this is solely how much I enjoyed these records. And keep in mind, I'm only human, I havent listened to a good lot of records I've heard others describe as top 10 worthy, these are just records I found and that I resonate with. long post ahead.

Vacation - Bomb the Music Industry (2011)

If you asked me what my favorite band is i will either say bomb the music industry or jeff rosenstock, but considering those are pretty much the same things it doesnt matter lol. While Vacation isnt a perfect record, it is one I love. It lacks some of the ska elements that I love about earlier BTMI records, but at the same time, it is the first record where Jeff’s “””solo””” career sound starts to form in tracks like Sick, Later, Hurricane Waves, Everybody That You Love, Everybody That Loves You, and Vocal Coach. And these tracks are all fantastic, especially the absolutely explosive opener Campaign For a Better Weekend. Where this album suffers in my mind is the fact that it exists as a weird hybrid middle ground between BTMI and modern Jeff Rosenstock, it isn’t really ska like old BTMI and it’s not quite to the same standard as the tracks on We Cool?. And some of the songs are just, not as good as the others, like Why, Oh Why, Oh Why (Oh Oh Oh Oh), which is washed out almost entirely in reverb, and tracks like Savers feeling barren and missing additional instrumentation. But fuck man I can not dislike this record or just call it “ok” because despite this I still listen to this record a lot, it’s so catchy and fun and Im a bit too chronically addicted to btmi.

Reflektor - Arcade Fire (2013)

i dont really get the hate/mixed feelings others have with this record. there’s so many good tracks dude!!!! sure theres a bit of a slump in the middle and it doesnt reach the same emotional heights as their previous records you gotta be ignorant to overlook this records strengths. while i do like The Suburbs more than Reflektor, man i just vibe HARD with some of these tracks; the title track, We Exist, Here Comes The Night Time, Normal Person, Awful Sound (Oh Eurydice), Porno, and ESPECIALLY Afterlife. Plus the cover art is cool and I like it. However Flashbulb Eyes is one of the worst tracks Arcade Fire has ever put out and I hate it immensely. And while far less offensive, tracks like You Already Know, It’s Never Over (Hey Orpheus), and Joan of Arc are just kinda boring and/or uninteresting. Now granted, I'm extremely biased when it comes to Arcade fire in general unless were talking about the trainwreck that is Everything Now. I started listening to Arcade Fire just before Reflektor came out, and I have a kinda sentimental attachment to the record. ill explain the feeling more when i talk about The Suburbs. anticipation oooooo.

good kid m.A.A.d city - Kendrick Lamar (2012)

i might get crucified by some for not putting this in my top 10, but whatever come at me i guess. gkmc is a fantastic record, but i do think the ending is weak, which is why it’s here instead of in the top 10. i mean, let’s be real, Real is a mediocre track, and while Dying of Thirst is an important track to the whole narrative of the record, it feels way too long. almost everything else about this record is fantastic, from the beats, to kendrick’s nasally flows, to the overall structure of the record spinning a tale of a young man battling demons both inside and out, and his eventual redemption. even if i find this record at times to drop pace, it really is flawless otherwise. it felt like a disservice to put this in the 20-10s, bc it’s a good record, but i had to make some compromises and this was one of them.

RTJ2 - Run The Jewels (2014)

el-p and killer mike are a perfect duo, and the tracks they make together are always total bangers. and for me, RTJ2 is the best overall, with RTJ3 in a close second. it’s hard to put this on the lower half of the list, some of the tracks just don’t work as well as the others, but despite that there’s not really any tracks i hate or dislike on this record, minus maybe crown. the pure aggression in the opening track Jeopardy sets the tone for an aggressive yet highly focused record. This is some of the best rap out there right now if you want some music to fuck shit up to.

Pure Comedy - Father John Misty (2017)

This record is both hilarious and extremely bleak. Josh Tillman is a master of satire and sarcasm, and Pure Comedy is the peak of his songwriting skills. The title track is one of the best tracks of the decade, period. And he keeps up the momentum on the following few tracks. The main problem with this record is its weaker second half, but even then it’s criminal to suggest that those songs aren’t good regardless. And despite the bleakness, the one line that sticks in my head after all this time is the line this album fades out to: There’s nothing to fear.

Knife Man - AJJ (2011)

Continuing on the trend of folky, satirical, and bleak records, Knife Man is AJJ’s defining record (next to their debut LP). AJJ blends loud, punky anthems with quieter, folk tracks that touch on sensitive issues in a way only AJJ manages to get away with. And there’s some genuine heart mixed in as well, with the final track Big Bird always striking a chord with me. However, I do feel the record is, let’s just say, padded at times in my opinion. Still, I can’t deny how much i enjoy tracks like Gift of the Magi 2, Hate Rain on Me, The Distance, and Skate Park. Speaking of which when I saw AJJ live recently they played none of those songs and that kinda sucked but hey it was like $20 I can’t complain. And speaking of not getting what I wanted...

You Won’t Get What You Want - Daughters (2018)

It was hard choosing between this record and their 2010 self titled record, but in terms of the overall narrative and variety this record shines through. If there was a number 11 spot in this unorganized list this would probably take that spot. It’s noisey, it’s abrasive, and it’s like nothing you’ve heard before unless you’ve listened to Daughter’s previous records. Tracks like The Reason They Hate Me are catchy in the weirdest and most unwelcoming of ways, Less Sex sounds like a long lost Trent Reznor NIN track, and Guest House is a masochistic and gut wrenching finisher. Fantastic record aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

We Cool? - Jeff Rosenstock (2015)

It’s obvious that I had to include this record somewhere on these list. It’s like a more refined version of the sounds that Jeff experimented with on Vacation. Definitely more punk than ska, but still some of those roots still shine through, especially in the track Nausea. Some of Jeff’s best songs are on this record, from the loud opening tracks Get Old Forever and You, In Weird Cities, to tracks dripping with bittersweet and moody lyrics like I’m Serious, I’m Sorry and Polar Bear or Africa. The main reason this record is on the back end of the top 20 is because the deeper cuts on the record do not match the energy and heights of the best tracks. Tracks like All Blissed Out, The Lows, Darkness Records and Beers Again Alone don’t feel like they belong and stick out a bit. They remind me more of the material Jeff put out on his 2012 EP I Look Like Shit. Mind you they aren’t bad tracks, but I’ll be honest I skip them often when listening to the record because i just wanna get back to the good good stuff.

Sports - Modern Baseball (2012)

Sports is one of the best pop punk records ever, if you can even consider it as such. It’s like a blend of emo and folk punk, and it works so well. A good majority of this record is on my main shuffle playlist. Is it pushing boundaries? Not really, but tracks like Re-Do, Tears Over Beers, and See Ya, Sucker are undeniably catchy and memorable. I NEED MODERN BASEBALL BACK TOGETHER RN. There’s not really anything that wrong with the record, besides maybe lacking in variety, but at 30 minutes, it’s a record that feels nostalgic even on a first listen, and continues to feel that way even after numerous re-listens. Speaking of nostalgia...

The Suburbs - Arcade Fire (2010)

Some background, when I was 13 (circa 2013), I only really listened to whatever my parents put on for me. From my mom, I “inherited” a taste for classic pop and 80s new wave. From my dad, I got metal and hard rock. The first time I made the conscious decision to listen to a record fully, based on my own curiousity, was when I sat and listened to Sgt. Pepper in the summer of 2013, which broadened the scope of what I thought music could even be. And later that year, the first band I got into after The Beatles? Arcade Fire. When I think of my early teens, the memories are set to this record. I remember listening to Ready to Start in my brother’s old hot ass car while driving to the local fair with some friends on a chill fall night, eating tons of junk and staying up past midnight back when doing that was edgy and cool and not a symptom of my depression.

If I was judging this record solely by its best tracks, it would easily be in the top 3. But I couldn’t place it in my top 10 because, frankly, some of the deeper cuts are lacking. I can’t say I like Deep Blue. I really don’t like Rococo. And Half Light I kills the pace of the record. But man, that title track, Ready to Start, Modern Man, Empty Room, Half Light II, Sprawl II... these songs defined my early teen years. I still tear up listening to the title track. Sure I have to skip a few songs when I re-listen, but I can’t place it any lower or my heart will break. It existing outside of the top 10 already hurts. And that’s all that’s left now. The top 10.

But first, some random honorable mentions that didn’t make this list:

Sound & Color - Alabama Shakes

Black Star - David Bowie

Saturation II - BROCKHAMPTON

Melophobia - Cage the Elephant

Teens of Style - Car Seat Headrest

How to Leave Town - Car Seat Headrest

Daughters - Daughters

Sunbather - Deafheaven

Bottomless Pit - Death Grips

Year of the Snitch - Death Grips (should be on this list tbh)

Doris - Earl Sweatshirt

I Love You, Honeybear - Father John Misty

Helplessness Blues - Fleet Foxes

Plastic Beach - Gorillaz

Boarding House Reach - Jack White

POST- - Jeff Rosenstock

S/T - Joyce Manor

Firepower - Judas Priest

ye - Kanye West

KIDS SEE GHOSTS - KSG

You Were There - Kill Lincoln

Flying Microtonal Banana - King Gizzard

Infest The Rats’ Nest - King Gizzard

No New World - Mass of the Fermenting Dregs

Bury Me At Makeout Creek - Mitski

Puberty 2 - Mitski

Unsilent Death - Nails

Itekoma Hits - Otoboke Beaver

Morbid Stuff - PUP

A Moon Shaped Pool - Radiohead

RTJ3 - Run the Jewels

Angles - The Strokes

To Be Kind - Swans

Undertale OST - Toby Fox

Scum Fuck Flower Boy - Tyler, The Creator

Igor - Tyler, The Creator

Weezer (White Album) - Weezer

nightlife - yuragi

#music #2010s

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demaury · 6 years ago

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Game On – High School AU | Enemies-to-friends-to-lovers AU (chap.2)

Ten years after his father shipped him off to boarding school, Jude is back to Los Angeles for his senior year. As it turns out, relinking with his childhood friend isn’t nearly as hard as it is to deal with his almost estranged father.

Zero is the typical high school heartthrob and a basketball prodigy on the way to make a name for himself. Everything should be easy, but years in foster care and physical abuse don’t make for the smoothest reunion with former teen-mom and her perfect family.

Really. They have a lot on their plate already.

Falling in love was not supposed to be an option. (read on ao3)

--------------------------

“You didn’t have to scare that poor kid.”

“He shouldn’t have fucking stared at me.”

“He was peeing.”

“Whatever,” Zero retorted grumpily as they made their way to their usual table.

Today though, he deeply hated that this table was located right in the middle of the Cafeteria. He could feel the glances of people on him as they walked by, and he clutched the water bottle tightly in his hands as a means to keep himself from bursting one way or another.

“Ladies and gents, our resident defendant,” Terrence drawled, sliding an arm around his shoulders as they hovered by their table.

“I’m gonna smash your fucking head, you know that, right?” Zero gritted, shoving him away.

Terrence laughed. It wasn’t his goddamn spot on the Basketball team that had been left hanging for half a week, Zero thought bitterly. He was about to fire off something again when his eyes traveled to the other end of the table, raking over the stranger sitting next to Kyle — who he was practically sure he had never seen around before. It was only when he met a pair of hazel eyes that his certainty vanished.

Hold on.

He knew that face.

He knew that face, and those eyes. Worse, he just knew that subtle ‘I’m-much-better-than-you’ aura emanating from him. It was there, written in the way he cocked an eyebrow, look at him straight in the eye, even to sit at their table like he had always been there.

“Well, well. Isn’t that Kinkade?” Zero said, forcing his voice to sound casual.

Zero could’ve sworn Jude’s eyebrow twitched just a little.

“Wow, you finally got bigger after all,” Kinkade replied simply.

The audacity.

What the hell was he doing here? He had left like, a thousand years ago, for God knows where. His eyes snapped back to Raquel when she started talking, reminding him that there was an actual world around him.

“Jude got transferred here from boarding school,” she said.

Zero smirked triumphantly. “Lemme guess, they got tired of you and kicked you out?”

“Why, is that something you’re familiar with?” Kinkade fired back, casually opening his soda can.

There was a sudden silence around the table as everyone just stared at them. Zero, for his part, was looking right at Kinkade, hoping to look less dumbfounded than he felt. Okay, no. He wasn’t in the mood for this. No way. Not happening.

Zero glared, the bottle crumpling in his hand ever so slightly. “Okay, yeah, that was nice. Anyway, some of us happen to have stuff to do, so I’ll see you guys around,” he articulated coldly.

He spun around and offered his back to his friends calling him out, already striding towards the exit when Kyle’s voice echoed closer. He barely glanced behind his shoulder, and welcomed the cool breeze that hit his face as he walked out with relief.

“Ducky, wait,” she protested, catching up to him. “What the hell was that? Are you okay?”

“Couldn’t be better,” Zero retorted, and he huffed a groan of protest when she proceeded to drag him towards the football field instead.

“I thought your spot on the team was safe?” she pointed out as they dropped themselves onto the empty bleachers.

“It is.”

“Then what’s the matter with you?” Kyle insisted, crossing her legs carefully as she faced him.

Kyle hadn’t worn anything but skirts since that one freaking day in middle school when Derek, Terrence and he had the genius idea to piss her off by stating that she wasn’t ‘a real girl’, just because she had been hanging out with them ever since third grade. No amount of apologizing could convince her to go back to jeans, and it had made being her male best friend a real pain in the ass when other guys had suddenly started to notice her.

He clenched his jaw and stared into the distance. “People are talking, and I hate that.”

“Maybe you should have avoided turning the Homecoming dance into a boxing match then.”

“First of all, that’s freaking rude coming from the one person who said Abramson deserved it,” Zero snapped.

She shrugged, unapologetic, and it made her blond hair bounce on her shoulders. “He did deserve it. I don’t take it well whenever somebody disrespects my best friend.” Zero snorted. “I’m just saying that it’s probably the most exciting thing most people will see this year. Two hotties fighting over one girl during Homecoming? That’s gold.”

He groaned in response, burying his hands in his jean pockets. “She keeps calling…and texting.”

“Did you talk to her?” Kyle asked carefully.

He shook his head. He hadn’t actually talked to Sadie since the moment she told him she was getting something to drink during the Homecoming night. Five minutes later, realization had hit with the strength of a truck launched at full-speed when he had gathered that the ‘Trav’ that she had been so keen on texting last summer wasn’t actually one of her cousins, but Travis Abramson, one of those no-brainer footballers.

If only they had merely talked.

He wanted to throw up.

“Great,” Kyle said. “I think it’s for the best, actually.”

Zero glanced at her, annoyed.

“For the best?” he deadpanned.

It had never been a mystery that Kyle didn’t like most of the girls he had been dating (she hadn’t liked the ones who had dated Derek and Terrence much either though). But still, It wasn’t like he had been waiting for her approval or he’d have died a virgin before it happened.

“You’ve never liked Sadie,” he retorted.

“Of course not!” Kyle exclaimed. “Look, I don’t mean to tell you ‘I told you so’, but-”

“Don’t you dare,” Zero glared at her, and she shrugged, pouting. “I don’t want to talk to her, and I don’t want to talk about her. Capiche?”

“Fine, fine,” she sighed, raising her hands in surrender.

There was a brief silence and Zero mentally started counting the seconds. She couldn’t keep quiet more than thirty seconds in a row anyway. He was reaching twenty-three when she suddenly turned her face to him and stopped staring at the grass.

“Have you seen Kinkade?” she asked, thoughtfully. “He got big too. I wonder what’s with you guys.”

Zero gave it a thought. Honestly, he had almost forgotten about that not-so-very-pleasant encounter with Jude ‘ever-so-perfect’ Kinkade. Just thinking about it made him frown. “Did you know he was coming back?”

“Nah. We found him this morning, all by himself. He looked totally lost,” Kyle said casually, tugging at her blond hair. “He’s cute, a real hottie now. I think Raquel’s definitely gonna call dibs on him.”

Zero cocked an eyebrow and huffed a laugh. “You’ve hung out way too much with us,” he stated, just as the faint echo of the bell rang for the next period, drowned by Kyle’s offended protests as they made their way back inside.

You’d think that being a 6’3” varsity basketball player was enough to deal with an ex-girlfriend, but apparently it was not, because Zero had found himself warily watching his surroundings between each period all morning, in order to avoid the familiar strawberry-blond head of Sadie every time he had to leave a classroom.

The only good thing, so far, was that their schedules hardly matched at all, which had been a real bother for the past month when they were still dating, but was now a sincere relief. Unless she decided to risk being late for her own classes, Zero knew for fact that Sadie was generally on the other side of the school pretty much all day long. That didn’t stop the judgmental looks he received from her various friends with whom he ended up sharing courses, but that he could deal with (he was very, very good at glaring anyway).

Last period ended and he regretted once more that someone, a long time ago, had decided that Basketball was a winter sport. It meant that they wouldn’t start practice for another month at least. Sure, he could practice with Wall and Roman in the meantime, like they had done for months now, but there was something profoundly boring about making shot after shot for two hours straight, every day.

Zero had to head to his coach’s office. He had been summoned, but he knew deep down it wasn’t to talk about the upcoming season.

“You wanted to see me?” Zero asked halfheartedly as he hovered close to his Coach, who was unlocking the door. “Don’t tell me Geyer pulled me off the team after all.”

The Coach gave him a look, the keys jingling against the door.

Jim Robertson was a man in his forties who had stopped being lean and athletic probably a decade ago. He had been his coach for the past three years, had known him since he was twelve, and when he was giving that kind of look, Zero generally knew it wasn’t a good sign.

“No, Principal Geyer did not,” the Coach corrected, then he opened the door and made him sign to get in.

Zero walked in but remained in the doorway, letting his backpack slide off his shoulder to the ground while Robertson rounded his desk. “Well, not yet, at least.”

Zero’s heart skipped a beat. Oh shit, he didn’t like that. He didn’t like that at all.

“Look, Zero,” the Coach said, opening the rolling doors of the cupboard behind him to flick through various files. “You’ve got to take care of your academics.”

There was a short pause and Zero stared, dumbfounded. “I’m sorry, what?”

The Coach looked over his shoulder at him. “The Abramsons wanted you kicked off the Team. Thanks to your left hook, their kid is going to miss the rest of the football season. The fact that you were not, doesn’t mean you will never be. You should probably avoid giving them a good reason now.”

Zero pursed his lips. “I’m doing all I can,” he grumbled. He had never been a freaking genius but he was at least okay. Or at least he thought he was. Just enough to make it onto the team since his freshman year, which was more than enough to him.

“Well, let me tell you,” the Coach said, rapidly going through a file before putting it back, “it’s not going to be enough. Study more. Find a tutor. But don’t let your grades drop any more than that.”

“It’s only October!” Zero protested. “The year’s barely started.”

“Find a tutor. Period,” Robertson said with a pointed stare.

A tutor. Like really.

Did he look like the kind of guy to do extra-homework? Did he? Okay maybe he would be forced to, because it wasn’t like there were a hundred ways out of the shit he had gotten himself into. But it wasn’t like he had a choice, Zero thought bitterly as he made his way out to the parking lot. It was certainly not like he was willing to risk his scholarship, nor the one he was determined to score for next year, for something as stupid as his grades. He’d rather die than end up at the gloomy neighborhood school he would have been forced to attend if Basketball hadn’t helped him out.

He was still sulking when he climbed in Terrence’s car and they headed directly to the Saldanas’, where the rest of the gang would join them. They had developed this habit of hanging out there the year before, when Jelena and Terrence had started dating. Raquel’s mother was a surgeon, her father a reporter, her sister was attending college and her house, located in a fancy neighborhood, was as big as it was empty of living souls.

“Drinks are in the fridge, snacks in the kitchen, bla bla bla,” Raquel said from her spot on the couch when they walked in. “Where’s Kyle?”

“She had to pick up her sister,” Zero shrugged as he dropped himself gloomily on the armchair.

Terrence sat next to Jelena while Derek came back from the kitchen and handed Zero a soda can.

“You didn’t bring Kinkade?” Derek snickered as he perched himself on the armrest of Zero’s seat.

Oh. So he wasn’t the only one who had noticed that she had been all over him all day long, apparently. Seriously, he spotted them together at one point and he had almost felt embarrassed to look at them.

Raquel shrugged. “Nah, he said he had other plans at home. Besides, Mom is supposed to come home early and I’d prefer to tell her about it before she stumbles onto him, herself.”

Zero frowned. “Why on Earth would she care? You’ve got all three of us,” he gestured to himself, Terrence and Derek, “in your living-room on a daily basis.”

“It’s not because he’s a guy, genius,” Raquel rolled her eyes. “It’s because of… you know, all that shit that happened when he left.”

There was silence and Zero was only satisfied by the fact that he wasn’t the only one who looked frankly puzzled. Raquel looked around as well. “You guys are joking right? You don’t know?”

Everybody groaned a ‘no’, except for Jelena who looked like she had already seen the end of the universe and couldn’t be less interested as she scrolled through her phone.

“Okay so... His mom and mine were friends. Then Jude’s mom died and that’s when the real shit began. His dad may or may not have something to do with it,” Raquel said, crossing her legs on the couch. Her voice was literally trembling with the contained excitement of juicy gossip, and frankly, Zero was disgusted.

He had never been exactly Raquel’s favorite person (okay, he had forgotten one date, and okay, it was the first one, but she was the one who decided not to give him another chance, so it was her loss anyway), that was a fact. So, all in all, he had always expected Raquel to talk shit about him behind his back (like he cared, though). But hearing her gossiping like her life depended on it, after acting all ‘besties’ with him five minutes after he got there? Zero didn’t have a lot of principles but it sounded like this one should have been common sense.

Did he tell anyone to fuck off?

No, not really. Because it was either discussing Kinkade’s life like a Showtime movie or having everyone talk about Sadie and him. Did that make him a coward? Maybe… Whatever.

His mind drifted back to the conversation when Derek snorted. “You’re bullshitting.”

Raquel glared. “I’m not,” she retorted dryly. “You can check online if you don’t believe me. It was all over the news when it happened, how come you guys didn’t see it?”

“Parents’ shitty divorce,” Terrence shrugged.

“Didn’t know them,” Jelena said.

“Didn’t watch the news,” Derek added.

“Deadbeat legal guardians,” Zero raised his hand. “I didn’t know the Kinkades were that big of a deal,” he commented again into his soda-can.

“Really? Because Forbes magazine thinks pretty much the contrary,” Jelena said casually.

Zero frowned as she turned her phone for them to see. The network headline was flaunting, in capital letters, a list of the hundred wealthiest families in the country.

Terrence took his girlfriend’s phone and scrolled through the list before handing it back to her. “What is he even doing in a public school? I mean, I thought he was in a private school.”

Just at this moment, the front door closed and a slightly annoyed looking Kyle walked in, a duffle-bag thrown over her shoulder. “You guys don’t know what it’s like to have the most annoying baby sister in the world.”

Jelena looked up with a cocked eyebrow. “You like Taylor.”

“At this point I’m not sure she’s still Taylor,” Kyle grumbled. “Maybe she’s been replaced by a goddamn human-eating alien. Here, I picked up your stuff,” she said, dropping the bag onto Zero’s lap as she rounded the armchair, before plopping down on the couch next to Raquel.

Zero gave her a nod as a thank you and discarded his stuff next to him on the hardwood floor. It wasn’t like he’d have been unable to survive a night without it, but he had packed some random stuff when he left for Kyle’s on Monday morning and at least his history book was in there. The Coach had told him to get better grades, it probably wasn’t the right moment to forget about doing his homework.

“What did I miss?” Kyle asked, looking around.

“Raq’s daily dose of gossip,” Derek shrugged. “Kinkade was on the menu.”

“Really,” Kyle drawled, grinning broadly.

“Quit it, it was about his dead mom.”

“Oh. Nice. You guys know how to have fun,” she snickered. “How about we talk about something else?”

Raquel had not lied, her mom came back early, which prompted everyone to leave. It wasn’t that Mama Saldana wasn’t nice, but she remained a parent, and if Raquel indeed planned to give her a heads up on the Kinkade situation, they better be gone.

Zero wondered why the news about a guy he barely knew in the end bothered him so much. Part of him was feeling rather awkward at the thought of his first exchange with Kinkade, but it wasn’t his fault if he happened to have a shitty past as well, nor was he supposed to know the extent of said shitty past.

Their relationship had been based on some sort of constant bickering. They had known each other in second grade, when Zero had moved in with his third foster family. Kinkade was already good at biting back. They weren’t in the same class, but recess was enough for them to find various and creative ways to jump at each other’s throats. ‘Next time you throw that ball at me, I’m gonna kick it out on the road,’ he would yell, to what Zero would reply ‘Not my fault if you’re always in the way, you moron!’

That’s how it had worked. Apparently the fact that they lived on opposite coasts for nearly ten years hadn’t caused them to tune it down, if the Cafeteria was any indication. Zero’s eyes glanced absent-mindedly around the familiar neighborhood, and he considered stopping by the district basketball court for a few seconds, as he hopped off the bus, before begrudgingly walking past it and making his way through the two more blocks separating him from 3174 Virginia Road. It was a one-story house that Zero hated to the core, from the cheap cigarette smell constantly floating over the living-room, to the bedroom he had to share with the most insufferable kid on Earth, and the kitchen from which nothing good ever came out.

He walked in, already riled up at the thought of simply being here. Despite being a foster kid himself, Zero had little to no idea how other kids in his situation lived, if it was any better somewhere else or not. Deep down he was sure it wasn’t, and that’s probably why he had been there for almost ten years. That and, according to nasty rumors, the fact that nobody was willing to take him back — if anybody was still there to do so at all. We aren’t family. Okay? Nobody’s here because they want to be. That’s what Joey (a girl who had lived with the Delucas when he had first arrived) said to him in lieu of a greeting, before pointing back to the couple. She was slightly older, maybe ten at the time. Trust me, they don’t want it either. Nobody does. Suck it up.

Joey had left the house about two years after that and had gone back to live with her alcoholic mother. Ever since, Zero had been the oldest, aside from those four months where a sixteen-year-old boy called Carter had come around when Zero was fourteen. When the Delucas moved from a somewhat more comfortable-looking house to a much cheaper one, six or seven years ago, the number of kids narrowed down to four. Zero had stayed put, watching other kids come and go ever since.

Zero walked in, not bothering to kick off his shoes in the entrance before he bee-lined through the kitchen to the bedroom. Most people would have referred to it as ‘his bedroom’, but if anything, he wasn’t that optimistic –hence why he wasn’t surprised to find the thirteen-year-old boy, with whom he was forced to share the room, sprawled over his own bed listening to music.

Zero dropped his backpack at the foot of the second bed and his duffle-bag on the mattress. His eyes darted onto the bedside table separating the two beds. There was a binder, with wrinkled papers emerging from it and probably represented Thiago’s backpack and general lack of care; on top of the binder, a phone charger, Axe spray, and various things he didn’t really take the time to examine before he grabbed the whole lot and threw it out the wide open bedroom door. The kid let out an offended screech of protest, dropping both his stupid hood and his earbuds in a single move as he got up.

“Fuckin’ asshole!” he blurted out, standing on his two feet. Zero wasn’t remotely fazed — the kid wasn’t any taller than his collarbones —, and Thiago seemed to realize it too because he backed away with gritted teeth.

“My side,” Zero uttered coldly.

He turned his back to the kid and opened the zipper of his duffle-bag in one swift move.

“Next time you leave, I fucking swear I’ll throw your stuff out,” Thiago raged.

“Have fun trying.”

Zero emptied the bag of the various wrinkled clothes he had worn for the past three days while at Kyle’s, grabbed them and strode out of the room as Thiago was dropping his own stuff on his mattress.

Zero went to the bathroom across the hall to get some laundry done.

“I hope he beats the fucking shit out of you when he gets back,” Thiago spat from the bedroom.

#hit the floor #htfedit #mine #*#*go #shameless self-promo but you need basically 0 knowledge of the show for this one #you're actually better off without knowing kjhghjkl

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snkpolls · 6 years ago

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SnK S3E11 Poll Results (Manga Reader Version)

The poll closed with 372 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that this is the results of the manga reader poll. Anime only watchers are suggested not to read if you do not wish to be spoiled about certain events! Anime only viewers, click here to view your poll results!

RATE THE EPISODE 367 Responses

Another week, another episode with high ratings. We’re happy to see overall enjoyment of the anime has stayed steady for several weeks!

best episode of the season thus far; nothing in this show has made me cry so hard since ymir's call of silence moment from season 2. WIT did amazing!

Best episode of this season!!! So happy with the way it turned out, except I wish they didn't play the credits when Carla was speaking at the end cause that took away from it. Also, baby Eren is the cutest thing to exist.

F L O C K! Very nice episode

great episode, really helped close things up with uprising and its setting up the change of gears for RtS

It was one of my favourite by far.

The episode was amazing as hell

THIS EPISODE HAD A SENSE OF FINALITY TO THE ARC. DO YOU THINK WE WILL GET A NEW OP/ED NEXT WEEK, DESPITE THE UPCOMING BREAK? 367 Responses

The majority of voters are confident we’ll be getting the same OP/ED combo one more time to finish off the story arc. It’s about an even split between those who think we will get something new and those who are unsure.

Withdrawal already starting to set in... what will we do without new eps.... and new polls to answer... no more new gifs... pls don't make it another 84 years. I cannot take that again.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING SCENES WERE YOUR FAVORITES? 367 Responses

The most beloved moment of the episode was seeing Eren smile after hearing what his mom had to say about him so long ago. Keith and Grisha’s backstory were close runner ups. The orphanage and the new titan guillotine also got plenty of votes!

I loved to see young Grisha, I like everything about his backstory.

The nosebleed... that is all

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING CHARACTER INTERACTIONS WERE YOUR FAVORITES? 368 Responses

Similarly to above, hearing Carla’s words to Eren was the favorite moment of the episode. Sasha trying to stay away from Keith got laughs out of many of us! Eren making Historia blush, Jean’s heckling him over her and Mikasa’s jealousy about them talking together were also highlights for the voters. Keith interacting with Eren’s parents also got high rankings.

Levi being all worried about Eren was something I really needed <3

Jeans salty ass comment towards Eren about Historia is why I love the man

Hanji's way of getting mad at Keith is even better in anime version and her voice is perfect <3

mikasa cockblockerman

I really really wish we had more Grisha x Carla interactions both in the manga and the anime. The little that we have seen from Eren and Mikasa's perspective shows a very affectionate relationship. Still, I really like how well WIT has brought even those few interactions to life.

Hange was absolutely amazing in this episode. I missed that insane excitement of hers! Historia's look upon being confronted by Mikasa was priceless! And Springles' teasing Marlow! Ahhh this was a very sweet episode! Now I'm just looking forward to the next one for major Eruri feels!

WHO'S MORE OBLIVIOUS TO ROMANCE - EREN OR MARLOWE? 362 Responses

It was a close call, but ultimately Eren wins the award of most romantically oblivious character!

HOW BEAUTIFUL DID CARLA LOOK AT THE WEDDING? 367 Responses

While a few voters weren’t impressed, the majority of voters found Carla absolutely stunning at her wedding.

Carla Jeager is the best mom of this show, that's all😞💖

Fuck Isayama and wit for making Carla so beautiful and just killing her off episode/chapter 1 my gay heart can’t take it

I’m sorry but all I thought whenever I saw Carla this episode was ‘Wow, she looks a lot like if Eren was crossdressing’ like the wedding, no that was just Eren crossdressing

Tfw Carla in a wedding dress looks like Eren with too much blush on... Poor woman, if she only knew what she was getting herself into.

It was so wonderful seeing Carla after so long! She looked absolutely stunning.

HOW CUTE WAS BABY EREN? 367 Responses

The majority of voters agree that baby Eren had the most pinchable cheeks, while a few weren’t fans.

Baby Eren is so cuuute!!!! OMFG

Baby Eren wasn't that cute, but him munching on Carla's hair melted even my frozen heart.

HOW DID YOU FEEL ABOUT KEITH AFTER HE TOLD HIS STORY? 367 Responses

Over half of voters felt bad for Keith after hearing his backstory. 21% felt he was just pitiful, and 12% related to Hange’s anger and disappointment toward him. Most of the write in comments were very understanding of him:

I felt bad for him when I read the manga chapter but I don’t know why, I thought he was kind of pitiful in the anime. Maybe it’s because the scene where Keith feels guilty and wants to apologize to Carla for what he said to her.

This man deserved happiness

I really didn't like him and his excuses.

i respect him

I felt sorry for him. This guy is a good guy but he has very low self esteem.

I think he's the same as Eren: normal person chosen to be someone special

I have mixed feelings about Keith. On one hand, he endured so much suffering throughout his life. He went outside the walls, something unthinkable for most people, and fought for what he believed in for over two decades. In the end, he had nothing to show for his efforts. On the other hand, he cost so many soldiers their lives because he was completely caught up in his inferiority complex. While I feel sorry for him, I agree with Hange.

A little bit of all the choices I suppose.

I relate to him lol

I realized that Keith is the character I can identify the most with. Somehow he resembles my own sad life.

Not as useless as he says

Well how would YOU feel if some rando from oUtSidE tHe fUcKiNg wALLs stole your girl?

I felt really sorry for poor Shadis. He had a gold heart but saw himself as useless. Maybe he wasn't talented commander and lost love of his life, but he is special and unique on his own way. He should understand what Carla was saying about Eren - "everyone is special" - doesn't matter if they do small or big things.

YOUR REACTION TO CARLA’S WORDS ABOUT EREN BEING SPECIAL? 365 Responses

Nearly 40% of voters found the words very touching, almost 30% believe it was something Eren really needed to hear at that time and 24% are still shedding tears over the commentary. A small few weren’t affected by the scene at all.

Eren is special, even if he doesn't think so (in many past moments and also future things he will do). He is different than others and not because he has the power of titans. His personality is unique, but also very realistic. Isayama has portrayed him really well.

Eren isn't special, and that makes him special

Carla's moving words about Eren were sadly wasted on him. Nobody tell Carla!

It was very heartwarming and full of love. Carla didn't care if Eren was going to be special or not. She just loved him warmly.

Those words resonated with me.

This episode by far was one of the most touching to me because Eren got acknowledged by his mother through Keith and i really feel like he needed to hear that because of how it would affect his morals from then on.

KEITH WANTED TO PROTECT EREN FOR CARLA’S SAKE. WHY DO YOU THINK HE GAVE IN AND LET EREN PURSUE THE SURVEY CORPS? 365 Responses

Over half of voters believe that Keith realized he couldn’t stop anything. 30% believe that he could see Eren was truly one of the “special people” that would bring about change. Smaller groups of people believe he cared about Eren’s autonomy or that he wanted to honor Grisha.

He did his best, but his best was never enough. The story of Keith's life as told by Keith.

I think Grisha's final words to him really hit him at that point. That he was just a bystander, but Eren being Grisha's son was anything but. He was one of the special people.

He saw his determination to keep going even though all odds were against him. Who is Shadis to decide to stop him?

He gave up after seeing Eren's determination

He realized no matter how hard he tries, he can't change anything. When he became commander, he couldn't save Survey Corps members from death, or prevent missions from failing. Just as he was a bystander when his fellow comrades fell victim to titans, he is a bystander as Eren progresses.

He saw in Eren the strong personality, a huge will power and also the fact the Eren may be more special than his father.

I think it’s a mix between fate and that he saw Eren was destined to be special so anymore interfering would result in failure in the end on his part. I think he realized Eren was just that Special of a person.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE SCENE OF THE VETS TALKING WITH ZACKLEY AND LEVI BEING ENTRUSTED WITH THE SERUM BEING PUSHED TO THE FOLLOWING EPISODE? 364 Responses

35% of voters agree that as long as the scene is included, that’s all that matters. 27% didn’t even realize the scene was missing and 26% agree that saving it for next episode was a good pacing decision. 10% still prefer the timeline of the manga.

Good decision. This episode was cramped as it is, having to skip the ED just to fit in everything, and having cut out so many dialogue, that if they put that scene in something else would have suffered. I already feel bad that Keith's chapter only got half an episode whereas Kenny got a full episode to himself. I've always liked Keith's story better too.

I can't wait!

Good decision. It wouldn't really fit in with the tone of this episode.

THOUGHTS ON FLOCH’S STYLISH RED ANIME-PROTAG HAIR? 361 Responses

Nearly half of voters were initially thrown off by the change in Floch’s hair color, but are ultimately open to it. 30% are still trying to figure out what is real in life and what isn’t. 14% think WIT committed an atrocity. A very small few think it suits him perfectly.

A surprise, to be sure, but a welcomed one.

I demand more swirls

His hair looks like an eagles nest but go off

Makes him more unique, in order to stand out more, but blonde would look better

As a ginger im offended, but I guess they did it to make him stand out ... and look less like Trump.

I thought he was blonde, but I still like it!

I hate floch and this is STILL the worst thing thats ever happened to me

I couldn’t think this was ever possible BUT Wit has made Floch even more awful... His hair is already one of the WORST thing in the world, now the color too. It makes me to dislike him even more lol. Thank you Wit for this pearl

Why they gotta do this to my man?

I imagined him as blonde so I'm still adjusting to that

It makes him look like the sort of guy who pulls over to show off his modified Honda Civic while blaring dubstep from his super rad sound system. Which is exactly the kind of person I've always pictured him as.

Wit seems to be making a lot of hair color changes that we don't expect this season. I don't hate it though.

HOW DO YOU THINK THAT KEITH, CARLA AND GRISHA WOULD FEEL ABOUT EREN IF THEY COULD SEE THE DIRECTION HE’S GONE IN RECENT MANGA CHAPTERS?

The results came out about as expected. Keith was a mixed bag with the majority of voters believing that he would either be neutral or a bit disappointed in Eren’s current actions. Carla being very upset with Eren’s actions got the most votes out of anything, while a smaller few just think she would be disappointed. Most voters agree that Grisha would be either proud or at least very understanding of Eren’s current choices and actions. Makes us wonder how Carla and Grisha would have co-parented as Eren got older!

Why there isn't a WTF option on the "What would Grisha/Keith/Carla think?"

WHICH SCENE FROM THE PV ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? 364 Responses

Overall, voters are looking forward to the scene where Eren, Mikasa and Armin have their talk, but 36% of voters are most looking forward to the detail of Levi listening in on them. 15% are looking forward to Sasha’s reaction to getting to eat meat, and 11% are looking forward to Erwin giving his fellow Survey Corps leaders words of encouragement before the retaking of Wall Maria.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

A very poignant one, considering they hired about a dozen of directors just for this episode.

Floch's hair is a bird's nest. Keith=Snape confirmed. Baby Eren eating Carla's hair is the purest thing to come out of this sad-factory.

Bystander is one of my favorite Manga Chapters of the series and the WIT definitely did justice to it. Thanks, WIT.

Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch Floch

I can't believe Uprising is already over! It hasn't even been twelve episodes yet and I'm excited for Return To Shiganshina but I'm also not ready…

I feel like this episode, particularly Keith's story, recaptured some of the sadness and sense of helplessness from early in Season 1. It was a breath of fresh air.

My god! What an episode, ladies and gents. This episode is by far my favorite (except for Floch's hair color, he should have been blonde, not anime-protag red). Now let's wait for next week's talk about the ocean with the Shignashina trio, shall we?

I feel so split. I want Eren to know he's great and brilliant but the way he's going in the manga scares me so much! Who is he now?!

Episode was great but I wish they would've kept these thoughts by Keith: "Those eyes. It's just like his father wanted. His life is like a blazing fire. And I'm sure that fire will burn him to ashes outside the walls. He'll never know what his mother wanted for him." Not a big deal at all but I just really liked those lines.

Is it just me or did this episode seem to put a lot of emphasis on Armin in a lot of Floch's scenes? Was it the same in the manga?? Foreshadowing??? I don't even remember.

Not enough Erwin. I need more Erwin.

I'm especially in awe of the animation because oh my god, Eren does resemble Carla most, but you can just see current manga Eren in young Grisha's appearance! I'm not so good at figuring out which features of the face make it so, but I think it's beautiful and lends a lot more authenticity to the fact that Eren resembles both his parents in a way, just like people do in real life!

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 345 Responses

Thanks again to everyone who participated. See you again on Tuesday!

#snk poll #snk polls #snk spoilers #snk s3 #poll results

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langernameohnebedeutung · 7 years ago

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Hey, I really want to watch the x-men movies, but there are so many and I'm super confused about in which order I should watch them, it kinda feels like there's kind of a star wars thing going on with "maybe the first one is the first one but maybe one of the later ones is actually the first one". Could you help me out there, since your magneto posts are kinda the reason I want to watch them in the first place? (Sorry this is super ramble-y :D)

Hi! - I often have the opposite problem: I try to get people to watch the X-Men Movies but I don’t know which order to best suggest them.

Before I get on with my advice for the general franchise:

Since you said you’re interested in Magneto, I think my easiest suggestion would be to start with X Men: First Class - which gives us Magneto’s background story + him kicking ass as a Nazi hunter and he’s kinda the hero there. The other suggestion would be to start with the original X Men movie from 2000. He’s the antagonist there, but he actually has valid points and makes them. Other good Magnetos are in Days Of Future Past and X Men 2.

Those are just my Magneto-Suggestions, but I’ll come back to him. Not just because you said my posts got you interested, but frankly. Because I stan him.

I make this into two sections, because I feel like I need to explain my reasoning a little, but feel free to skip right to the second half of this post

Pre-Blabla

Basically the X Men Franchise have several sub-categories:

1) The Original Triology - from the early 2000,

X Men,

X Men United

X Men Last Stand.

They play in the “near future” - which basically means present day. The main-characters here are Logan/Wolverine and Rogue but the triology also features the biggest spectrum of X-Men characters and Magneto being a very sarcastic Ian McKellen whose life mostly revolves around taking down anti-mutant politcians and dragging literally everyone. He’s pretty understandable as an antagonist in X Men and in X Men Last Stand and kind of an anti-hero in X Men United.

2) The Wolverine-Solo Movies - along with Deadpool the only X Men Movies that focus on one character in particular:

X Men Origins: Wolverine

The Wolverine

Logan.

They basically cover the entire life of Logan/Wolverine - which is a pretty long life despite his smoking habits. And drinking habits. And almost getting himself killed habits.

3) The Prequels:

X Men First Class

X Men Days Of Future Past,

X Men Apocalypse.

They’re the backstory for Charles, Magneto, Mystique and Hank and from Apocalypse on also for the characters you meet as grown ups in the prequel. (The next one will be Dark Phoenix and it will focus on Jean Grey from what we know).

The prequel movies start in First Class with (flashbacks to) the childhoods of Charles and Erik and Raven/Mystique and usually each movie takes place in a different decade.

X Men First Class is in the 60s, Days of Future Past in the 70s and Apocalypse in the 80s and Dark Phoenix, which will come out this year, is set in the 90s. Some don’t like the decade-skipping, but I like it because it’s really an interesting way to follow the characters. The only thing that would make it better is mockumentary style.

4) -- Deadpool. He’s his own sub-category. Because he’s Deadpool. Basically you can watch Deadpool whenever you want - there’s a few jokes you’ll get more if you’re familiar with the franchise, but basically you’ll get the movie.

There’s also the 2 TV shows “Legion” and “The Gifted”. Legion is about Charles Xavier’s son David Haller and his struggle with his powers and multiple personality disorder. I didn’t have the opportunity to watch Legion yet, but I heard good things.

I did watch The Gifted and I really loved it and since it doesn’t feature any major X Men-characters from the movies or storylines it should be safe to watch at any point. I think the only one from the movies in there was Blink but you didn’t need to know that to see The Gifted, because her movie appereance is chronologically AFTER The Gifted.

Also you get to meet kids of Magneto (Polaris) and of Emma Frost, so that might make it more satisfying to watch it after X Men First Class. If you like Magneto, you’ll likely also love Polaris whose slowly adopting her father’s politics and ideology in the first season and got his powers and a better fashion sense.

More confused then you were before you started watching this? okay.

To The Point: Which Order To Watch Them In

The most straight-forward way to go about it is to watch them in the order they came out:

The Original Triology first, then The Wolverine-Solo Movies, then The Prequels and Deadpool. Of course, Deadpool, Logan and The Wolverine all came out during the Prequels, but plotwise it doesn’t make much of a difference (although I recommend watching The Wolverine before Days Of Future Past, because it connect The Last Stand and Days of Future Past a bit better. If you want to be as precise as possible you can look up the order of publication here: x

As I said, that’s the most straightfoward way to go about it, but you can take liberties which brings me to my second suggestion - which is one I often make to people and earn glassy eyes.

If you want to get a “broader” taste of the franchise, a good idea is to take turns and watch a bit of each. So here’s a suggested order which gets you into contact with every part of the franchise quickly without sacrificing too much of the “overall” plot.

First of all, as I said, Deadpool can be watched at any time. The later you watch it the more jokes you get - but because it’s Rated R and the others aren’t, they can’t really use it to further the overall plot and you’ll always be fine.

The same goes for Logan. Of course, Logan is based on probably the most Earth-shattering event in X-Men history, but so far the only mention of that event is in the movie Logan and no one knows what really happened yet, so don’t let that deter you. If you watch it, you know as much about it as anyone else.

For the others I would recommend:

Either the original X Men from 2000 or X Men First Class first, because you don’t need pre-knowledge for either of them. (In fact, X Men First Class might be a bit more exciting if you don’t know exactly where everyone is going to end up. Also you will get into it with a lot more characterisation and motivation for the shit Magneto does. Although I think the original triology also gives him enough movivation.) But if you start with First Class, I would still watch X Men next.

After that I would recommend X Men United because it’s the best way to follow the storyline of the main-characters.

X Men - Wolverine Origins (My only suggestion here is to watch X Men United before you watch Wolverine Origins, because it would kinda spoil stuff for you. Wolverine Origins also has kinda a reputation for one of the worst movies in the franchise, but personally I didn’t think it was all that bad. I enjoyed it.).

X Men Last Stand

The Wolverine - In theory I’d say you can watch The Wolverine all on its own, but it would spoil the finale of Last Stand for you, so I would watch that first and it does connect it a bit more to Days Of Future Past so I would recommend watching it before that.

Days Of Future Past - Finally another prequel movie. Aka the Time -Travel one. (Yes I’m sure the Avengers will go there in Infinity Wars 2, but let it be noted, the X Men did it first and they did it pretty well.) The thing is, the storyline is divided, featuring the “Old” characters from the original triology (although they’re literally old now) and the cast of the prequels living a pretty shitty life in the 1970s and suffering the consequences of the Vietnam War and the JFK assassination. Things that hit mutants pretty hard apparently.

Here’s the thing about Days of Future Past and it’s general X Men Movie-weirdness: There are two versions of the movie. The normal “Days of Future Past” and “Days of Future Past: The Rogue Cut.” The “Rogue Cut” actually features Rogue from the original theory. The normal cut doesn’t. She’s cut from the entire movie. So while you can basically watch Days Of Future Past at any time and get the general idea (the most important one I would recommend watching before Days of Future Past is X Men First Class), if you watched the original triology and liked Rogue as a character, you might want to go for the Rogue cut. The DVDs/Blu-Rays don’t really cost more and you learn about an additional character.

X Men Apocalypse: I have issues with the movie, but well. It exists. It introduces the grown-ups from the X Men school in the original triology as children and explain how they met Charles. I think X Men Apocalypse can also be watched at almost any point, because it doesn’t really feature much of the overall storyline - it’s certainly easier to place anywhere than Days Of Future Past.

Dark Phoenix - As I said, this one isn’t out yet, but from what I read I recommend watching at least X Men Apocalypse before you watch that, because the focus will be on the young Jean Grey as well as other characters introduced there.

When it comes to Magneto, the movie sounds promising too, because from what the makers said so far it sees him mentoring Jean after a break-down and building up Genosha, the mutant sanctuary island that he ruled over in the comics for a while. Also there’s been a promo pic of a funeral and ever since I feel dread coiling inside my stomach and everyone is speculating who will die.

Again, fit Deadpool and Logan in there how you like. There will also be New Mutants coming out soon - we don’t know all that much about that really, but none of the major characters seem to feature, so you’ll likely be fine watching that as well.

Also if you’re interesting in a (well-written) Magneto I recommend the animated show Wolverine and The X Men (which also sees him as the ruler of Genosha and there’s a lot of focus on him and his relationship with his children in that one). Also there’s one episode of Iron Man_ Armoured Adventures (”The X-Factor”) which does pretty well by Mags.

Most importantly: Due to writing and ret-conning and Time Travel, the X Men Franchise is a bit of a mess when it comes to continuity. Even if you’re watching this in the perfect order, there will be things that JUST DON’T MAKE ANY FUCKING SENSE (And not just that Magneto doesn’t age for 40 years and has like 5 years left to go from Fassbender to McKellen).

Basically - have fun with it. Watch whatever looks fun and interesting to you - you’ll probably get the basic story of every one of them and if you want to make sure that you would get one or wonder about any basics you would need to know to watch one of the movies, feel free to send me an ask.

Have fun and I hope you enjoy them!

#X Men #fandom #marvel #I hope this confusing mess helps you and doesn't just scare you away for good.#Anonymous

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izukacchan · 8 years ago

Link

fandom: Boku No Hero Academia

pairing: Katsuki Bakugou/Midoriya Izuku

A/N: this is a lot longer than the previous chapter and im sorry but this short little thing is now complete! I hope you all enjoy <3 (Also i always attach the fic itself onto my posts but i’d read this on AO3 for text format reasons :O)

Chapter 1

Chapter 2 (here)

It’s always fucking Deku.

For all his life, whenever Deku was involved his body set off some kind of voluntary alarms, so nothing about this was a new sensation, but the fact that the center of all his attention, admiration and...affection? -- that’s disgusting, forget he even thought that -- whatever it’s called, all of it being pointed in Deku’s direction to this degree was a new level of danger he wasn’t ready to handle.

What even was it? He knew Deku stood out, he knew Deku was different, but so did everyone else who ran into the asshole, so why had he let himself fall this deep?

Flipping around on his back and throwing his hands into his face he groaned long and loudly in annoyance. Something about this bastard was keeping Bakugou’s heart locked in place and tied around his little finger, every word held some new weight of significance that didn’t previously exist and it was making his stomach whirl.

Friend.

Rival.

Partner.

Why?

Why him?

Bakugou slammed the door to his bedroom behind him and let out the roar he’d been keeping in his chest all night...no, all day…no…all this time of nothing but fucking buildup for months erupted from his heart and out of his mouth as he kicked off his shoes and paced around – face buried in his hands frustratingly.

While pacing and growling into his palms he heard three knocks come from the outside of his wall.

This school could pay to get a dorm building set up in less than a few weeks, but couldn’t put enough of that budget into making sure the walls weren’t paper fucking thin, so often Kirishima would bang on the other end of the wall in the most convenient way possible of telling him to quiet down.

At that warning, Bakugou immediately resorted to trudging himself to his bed, collapsing face first into the mattress, and screaming angrily into his pillow instead.

Why Deku? Out of all the people in the world why was it Deku?

It’s always fucking Deku.

What even was it? He knew Deku stood out, he knew Deku was different, but so did everyone else who ran into the asshole, so why had he let himself fall this deep?

Friend.

Rival.

Partner.

Almost a decade of falling out and still being enraptured in each other made Deku both a familiar and unfamiliar presence, one that still managed to surprised him but he still somehow knew better than anything else. It was an odd mixture that made Bakugou realize no matter what, him Deku weren’t ever going to be the ideal perfect image of childhood sweethearts that you’d read about from a fucking shoujo, but even so…. what was this?

“It’s nothing,” Bakugou muttered to himself through grit teeth, “It’s something, but it’s nothing, get a hold of yourself,”

Lifting himself up from the bed he kicked off his shoes and stood up to the direction of the bathroom to get a shower running.

He wasn’t going to let himself be some lovesick puppy, okay so he might – he has a crush on Deku.

Whatever.

The next day is coming and he can just ignore it, now that he’s unfortunately and agonizingly sure of these feelings he can keep up like a normal human being and try not to be too obvious, right? Other kids like his classmates may be terrible at hiding their infatuations but Bakugou wasn’t any ordinary kid.

He could take these feelings and kick it in the ass like he did everything else.

He tried his damndest to keep himself psyched on that ideology.

He went to bed chiming the promise to himself in his head as a reminder, and woke up the next morning reminding himself over and over again.

He felt good about it, grabbing his backpack and shoes he sucked in a deep breath and smiled smugly to himself, fully reassured.

The minute he stepped out the door he was gonna head to class, look Deku in the eye, and get on with his fucking life like none of this ever happe-

“…Oh! Good morning, Kacchan!”

The minute he opened the door, everything about Bakugou’s determined posture melted.

“What…” Bakugou, started staring at Deku in disbelief.

“Uh…”

“We’re.. we’re you…,” Bakugou looked around the hallway to see if anyone else was with Deku or was maybe heading this direction, but no, the only person around was the one infront of him, wearing a mixture of a nervous and amused wobbly smile, “How long have you been fucking standing out here?”

“Oh, not long!” Deku laughed, “I got here maybe a few minutes ago...I figured you know…it wouldn’t be too bad to walk to class together, right? You don’t mind?”

Deku looked up at him with teasingly pleading eyes and Bakugou’s heart skipped a beat.

“No… no, fuck why the hell would I care?” Bakugou grunted, “You should still probably think to maybe warn people before just popping up wherever the fuck you’d like.”

“I thought you just said you didn’t care?” Deku huffed out amused, “Kidding, kidding, you’re right… but erm…so the real reason I came a little unannounced is uh…”

Deku started twiddling his thumbs around and Bakugou was beginning to lose what patience he had.

“What? Open your mouth and talk,”

“Well uh,” Deku continued with a smile, lifting one hand to the side of his face as if he were about to tell Bakugou an important secret, and instinctively, Bakugou stiffened.

“Do you… have the answers to last night’s homework?” he whispered harshly.

What.

“Wh- what the…”

“Heh…heh…”

“Deku, what the FUCK why didn’t you fucking do it before th-“

All Might.

Bakugou stopped himself, and Deku looked a little relieved he understood.

“Hah...yeah well see, I was going to do it before coming to Kirishima’s but then… I got a little caught up you know?” Deku started twiddling his thumbs again, “And when I got home last night, even though I was exhausted I thought about doing it then, but I remembered what you said about how ‘there’s no fucking point-,”

“-if you’re already halfway fucking dead,” Bakugou finished Deku’s poor imitation.

“Yeah, right! You said that last time I came to class kinda you know a little...” Deku knocked on the side of his head twice to finish his sentence for him and giggled nervously, “in the end, I ended up passing out anyways, so I’m really sorry but,” he pressing his hands together apologetically he finished, “please, Kacchan?”

So, he fell for an idiot, a complete fucking idiot.

“What the hell ever,” Bakugou hissed throwing his bag over his shoulder and stepping past Deku to walk ahead, “Yeah, I got it done, you’re real damn lucky you can write fast Lightning-Hands,”

Deku sped up to catch up to Bakugou and settled into a pace right beside him, shoulders brushing. They had been at this for awhile but suddenly the significance of Deku walking alongside him was a lot more evident, and he had to temper the shade of red threatening to cross over his face.

“’Lightning-Hands’… that’s a new one, although it makes me think of Kaminari a bit,” Deku pouted, “anything a little more creative, maybe?”

“Sure, how about ‘step-the-fuck-off-you-fucking-nerd’,”

“Oh wow, that is creative…definitely a mouthful though…not your best work,”

“You know what? You can fail actually, you get nothing.”

“Kacchan wait, no please,” Deku mockingly whined with a laugh.

“You heard me! Nothing, you fucking asshole,” Bakugou tried to sound serious but the smile creeped up on his face against his own wishes as Deku knocked into his side trying to reach for Bakugou’s bag.

All down the hallway their bickering continued, the sound of Deku’s laughter followed by Bakugou’s sneers echoed against the walls unknowingly waking up the last few people sleeping in, and momentarily startling the students already awake, but much groggier than pair.

This was not an unusual occurrence for the class these days, and Bakugou was only maybe halfway aware of how embarrassing it was because the other half of him always decided in the moment he didn’t really give a fuck as he knocked Deku around and the two of them chased each other down the hall.

‘Lightning-Hands’? What was I thinking?

Behind him, Deku was hurriedly copying Bakugou’s work down, whilst the blond ran his fingers through his hair frustratingly, clenching his teeth and flexing his fists.

He couldn’t tell what he was more embarrassed about, the fact that he may have been flirting or how he’d chosen to go about it. Either other way it was pissing him off as reality had finally dawned on him for the moments he wasn’t in speaking range of Deku.

So much for kicking this infatuation in the ass, everything mundane about their interactions were now hitting Bakugou like a train. Actually, it had been doing this before, so this was more like 10 trains consecutively piling on each other.

When Aizawa came dragging himself into the classroom and picked up their homework, Bakugou tried to focus on the old man instead, trying to put everything off his mind to focus on the one goddamn thing in the class that wasn’t going to give him as much heart burn.

Sometime in the middle of Aizawa talking, Deku started poking on Bakugou’s back.

He was still unbearably irritated, and now wasn’t the time, but Deku was insistent.

“Kacchan… psst, Kacchan,”

“What,” Bakugou whispered harshly not bothering to turn around like he normally would.

“You have to turn around, hey…” Deku whispered just as harshly, continuing to poke at his shoulder.

The tingle he got from the contact was returning, and the quickness of his heart beat only proved to piss him off more than it did excite him.

“Whatever you have to say, say it now.”

“What? No, turn around I want t-“

“Either say it don’t!” Bakugou whispered in a yell, still refusing to turn around and harshly slamming his fist down on the desk.

“Midoriya, Bakugou, do you two have something to share with the class?” Aizawa grunted, clearly annoyed with seeing the two furiously go back and forth.

Normally, Bakugou would turn around and freely communicate with Deku, in the few times Aizawa had admonished them it had been because they were too loud laughing, too loud with sounds of approvals, Deku’s “Ohhh”’s and “Ahhh’s” over whatever they were blabbing about causing a disruption, those kinds of things.

Typically, he just didn’t mind, but Bakugou’s dealt with enough class call-outs to not be bothered by Aizawa’s tone whatsoever.

And even though this instance was definitely a little different, Bakugou had become a master of coming up with a fake response on spot.

“No, Sensei. Deku was just asking a question,” Bakugou replied as though it were rehearsed, “It’s over with and dropped now, right?”

Bakugou aimed the end of his question at Deku, and though a little perplexed, Deku responded back.

“Y...yeah sensei, it’s okay really, sorry,” Deku called.

With a dissatisfied sniff, Aizawa turned back around to the board to continue his lesson, Deku buried his face back in his notes and didn’t prod at Bakugou again. Somehow a lot of the tension Bakugou was feeling had went away with knowing Deku’s insistence had been killed.

The remainder of the class went on normally, and it’s when lunchtime hit that Bakugou realized he had another issue.

“Kacchan!” Deku had stood outside his desk waiting for him to get up, “we’re eating lunch on the rooftop today right?”

Bakugou and Deku had started a tradition of eating lunch alone together when Deku came back from meetings and discussions with All Might. It was a time dedicated mostly to Deku talking about all the things the mentor and student had spoken to about in private, and Bakugou more than willing to listen and feed into all of Deku’s worries and excitement. It was something he’d rather Deku blabber about to him than just anyone again, anyways. It was easily an excuse for alone time, and Bakugou had found himself actually looking forward to it whenever Deku approached him with the invitation.

But today….

“Guh…uh,” Bakugou started, and Deku’s face looking a little disappointed, “Not…not today,” Bakugou picked up his lunch and bag and stepped away from Deku to keep a distance from his face, “You can just tell me later, or something I guess, but I promised the gang I’d sit with them and entertain their bullshit for a day.”

Deku looked at Bakugou as if he wanted to ask ‘why would you do that?’ - and he was right, why the fuck would he do that – but he seemed to think better of it and just resigned to a sigh.

“Okay…that’s um…that’s fine, you have fun, I’ll sit with the others too…” Deku was clearly a little sad and worried looking, but he took in a breath anyways to finish his sentence, “be nice to them okay? Don’t let them drive you too crazy,”

He forced a laugh, and Bakugou feeling a little bad and decided to go ahead smile smugly back.

“There’s no fucking way that won’t happen,”

Having been a little reassured by Bakugou’s silly response, Deku’s down-trodden face slowly began gleaming again, and with a laugh he turned to exit the classroom.

“I figured,” he laughed over his shoulder, “Still…good luck, anyways!”

As Deku exited the classroom to head to the commons, the minute Bakugou heard the last of his footsteps, his smile dropped into an evident and irritated frown.

The feeling from last night of being separated from Deku was erupting again, but now equally piled on with the irritation of knowing these feelings were making his stomach sick again.

He had to stay away from Deku.

Because avoiding the problem has always worked, right? Bakugou’s conscious asked sarcastically to himself before choosing to ignore it.

If he avoided the problem, he could figure out how to deal with it.

That was his new plan.

So at the end of the day when everyone was packing to leave, instead of waiting for Deku, he got his things and said he was going to his dorm alone.

“Alone?” Deku looked disappointed again.

“Yeah, as in ‘by myself’,” Bakugou grunted.

He never bothered coming up with an excuse for Deku or a lie, this was just the situation, and even if Deku looked like he desperately wanted to ask ‘why?’ or ‘what’s wrong?’ he just lowered his gaze slightly and complied.

“Well…alright, I’ll see you later then I guess?”

“Yup,” Bakugou replied quickly with little care, “later.”

Bakugou hurriedly exited the classroom, didn’t look at Deku’s eyes, didn’t stop to see if he had something more to say, just grabbed his things and walked out with his head held high.

This was a start.

When he got home he immediately threw his things down, and settled on his bed, ready to do this self-reflection thing and find a solution to the problem.

However, Day 1 of figuring out how to solve his infatuation only came up with one answer:

Avoid him.

The next day, Bakugou did just that.

Deku approached Bakugou in the morning at his desk as he usually did and gave a beaming, “Good morning!” to which Bakugou simply replied to with a wave and didn’t bother looking Deku in the face.

Normally, Bakugou would have responded with a grunt or at least some snide remark but his passiveness caused Deku to freeze in shock from going toward him for a moment, and with a worried look, he opted to turn around to talk to Uraraka and Iida instead.

This lasted for the rest of the week, Deku made open approaches and Bakugou either ignored him or hardly gave a response. Having Deku out of his space cleared his head a little more, but made little room for the intrusiveness his more painful and berating thoughts.

You’re an idiot.

“Kacch-,“ Deku had whispered behind him one day, trying to start a conversation before being interrupted by Bakugou abruptly raising his hand.

“Aizawa-sensei can I be excused I gotta take a piss.”

You’re doing it again.

“Kacchan, hey are you-“ Deku started another day, but had been cut off by the sound of Bakugou’s chair screech as he stood from his desk once again leaving early for home.

“Kacchan!” Deku had called at Bakugou’s back but he didn’t turn back to respond and just kept moving forward.

Don’t talk to him.

Sucking in a breath Deku approached Bakugou with his lunch and slammed it down on his desk, a bit of a desperate look painted his eyes but the smile of his still gleamed.

“Kacchan? All Might told me something really cool the other day, can we talk about it?” Deku spoke quickly, but his voice was left with a tinge of strain as he tried to hold up.

“No. Not today,” Bakugou avoided eye contact in his cold response, which was not nearly as strong as he felt.

You want to talk with him.

The next day Bakugou had walked out the classroom early, he of course wasn’t met with Deku’s excited gleam on the path home, he walked the sunset shadowed sidewalks alone. The sound of the wind and clinging gates that had been previously drowned out by the sound of Deku’s voice and his laughter on the trail were now louder than ever, and the pain in his heart was inescapable.

You’re starting to miss him.

Lain sprawled on his bed and staring at the ceiling, Bakugou grabbed a pillow from his left, repeated the thing he did the first night of his realization, and screamed.

Bakugou had spent more time trying to figure out how to avoid the situation than actually solving it, but the problem wasn’t him, it was Deku.

Deku was making him feel like this.

Deku was making him feel sick.

Deku was making him feel weak.

So how was he supposed to confront the problem if the problem’s existence twisted his insides just as much as being away from it did?

Tossing and turning, he tried to sleep, but everyday of this created a new pile up of noise in his mind that he couldn’t tune out, so much noise that he almost didn’t notice the sound of phone vibrating behind him.

Against his best wishes, his heart skipped excitedly when he opened up the phone to see the notification.

FUCKING DEKU now

Hi Kacchan! :)

Bakugou stared wide eyed at his phone for a bit, wondering how to respond. The bridge of texting him took a lot of his edge off, but he realized if Deku started asking questions about his behavior, he’d probably have to cut it off.

With that in mind, he sent the most neutral response he could think of.

what the fuck do you want

Bakugou expected a reply immediately, but there was a moment of silence between the notification of Deku having read his message that made him a little more nervous than he’d expected. However, when signal showing Deku was typing finally showed up, he stared at his phone expectantly.

nothing I just wanna talk…! ^^;

Bakugou grimaced at the response, it was too vague for him to entertain so instead he returned the favor.

I don’t have anything to talk about

After sending the text, he knew he was lying. He wanted to catch up, he wanted to make up for what time he’d neglected, he wanted to see his inbox fill as Deku spammed him with handwritten notes and explanations, and he wanted to talk about all the mundane things in the world, but he knew it would all lead to Deku asking the questions he didn’t want to answer.

Whats been wrong?

Are you okay?

And he’d have to answer, he’d feel inclined to give Deku the reason, he’d be forced in that moment to confess once the question was lain down. Bakugou wasn’t going to place himself in a position to lie, saying “nothing” was not an option for him anymore, so instead he gave Deku the wheel to decide where to go.

oh…yeah, me neither honestly haha :’)

And the conversation was killed, successfully.

Feeling a little bummed about it damned himself, Bakugou decided to fill the void by scrolling up to old conversations instead.

He found an old one from October and smirked, remembering it.

Kacchan what are you doing for Halloween this year? :O

locking myself away from you freaks, don’t think I didn’t see u sneaking around with hair-for-brains and four-eyes. Im not getting involved

gah I thought we were being sneaky >_< Kacchan its just a Halloween party, it’ll be fun!

Everyones going to be dressing up like what the fuck? are you all still in preschool?

Kacchan you only stopped dressing up last year, you don’t have to look cool in front of everyone :/

You’re right, because im fucking awesome already

Haha I guess that’s true too <3

Don’t be like that! Anyways, if youre not coming can you help me think of a costume?

Sure, not All Might.

But KACCHAN I could ask him to borrow his REAL UNIFORM it’d be authentic!!

You don’t think everyone would find it pretty fucking weird if u had an "authentic" all might costume?

Eh….>_>;

No All might costume.

Bakugou remembered for a bit Deku had stopped the conversation, and there hadn’t been a response for about 30 minutes before Bakugou got irritated and felt the need to push his point more.

If I wrap some toilet paper around my head or some shit will you do it too so im not the only one looking like a fucking idiot? Why do you insist on sticking out like a sore thumb all the damn time

Deku had responded immediately

Oh! you mean like mummies?

What else is fucking wrapped in toilet paper

That’s actually kind of cute… sure why not! Itd be fun to do something with you :)

say something stupid like that again and im cancelling

Fine… that’s really cool of you Kacchan ^^ Do you think we should get seros or aizawa-sensei’s help instead of toilet paper tho??? It’d be more authentic!

Would you look at that? Halloween = Cancelled

KACCHAN IM SORRY

The conversation went on from there and in the end Deku convinced Bakugou to go with him to ask Momo to clone some of Aizawa’s wrapping instead. And the Halloween party had actually been fun save for someone in in the class tying his and Deku’s wrapping together on purpose, causing them to accidentally trip around and shit, you can use your imagination for that because honestly Bakugou would rather forget it.

Scrolling down, more conversations ensued.

If i got a fish would u get one with me? The dorms said those are the only pets we can have and im lonely ):

No bcs then id choose the biggest and baddest fish and you’d choose some small little baby fuckmunchkin

Whats your point?

My fish would kill your fish

okaaaay....so…why don’t we both choose either two big fish or two small fish?

Id still pick the fucking best fish and you'd have to hold a funeral

Ok Kacchan -_-

A little further down.

Deku guess the fuck what

What? :O

Bakugou was sure the sign for him typing had been up for a long time and he pouted a bit embarrassed if Deku had watched the phone for it.

I was sparring with the arms guy right? The dude with loads of fucking arms, I wanted to show I could beat him in a fist fight. everything was going fucking great, only fists, I was dodging and everything but then the mother fucker clocked me in the face and my nose started bleeding -- he was so distracted by it I flipped the piece of shit on his ass with a sweep kick

It was fucking awesome, I guess using legs and fists isnt as shitty when I do it

My nose is still bleeding too. It’s a fucking pool of blood deku it just AINT STOPPING

Bakugou remembered he had taken over that entire conversation while walking to class after the spar with a small towel under his nose and a self-satisfied smile.

However, by the time he had reached the classroom he had seen Deku and Round-Face speaking to each other, glaring at Deku’s phone with concern and confusion.

“I just don’t know how he expects me to respond to this Uraraka. Do I get worried? Do I say good job? Do I-“

“WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SHARING OUR CONVERSATIONS, DEKU?”

He kind of laughed at the memory now despite his irritation then, and continued to scroll through mindless conversations with Deku and finding the sick feeling in his stomach turn warm.

And as he continued scrolled through he made two assertions:

The first one being, Bakugou was so fucking obvious, anyone who read this would think Bakugou’s been pining for Deku since day one, he felt disgusted at his own lack of ambiguity.

The second realization being, Deku definitely couldn’t like him back.

Deku was Deku.

Always this kind to everyone and attentive to everyone’s will and wishes. Bakugou felt the sickness in his stomach return everytime a “<3” or a “cute” made him read the text as anything more than Deku’s usual shit.

And because of this, Bakugou knew he couldn’t ever let Deku know about these…feelings. No, he had to hope it would wane off, finding a way to deal with it only led to one solution: Telling him. And hell if Bakugou was going to scare Deku off with his own selfish, completely unreciprocated feelings.

He had to wait it off for as long as he could, and that meant continuing with his Deku-Deficiency.

So for weeks and weeks, Bakugou kept up avoiding him.

Every approach and every day Bakugou shook Deku off, the green haired boy’s face begun contorting from worry to annoyance over the course of time.

One day after Bakugou shrugged off another one of Deku’s invites to lunch, Bakugou thought he heard the boy growl in frustration.

And as this went on, Deku seemed to become more predisposed to just keeping away from Bakugou too. After the school day ended, with an upturned nose Deku would purposefully leave earlier than even Bakugou, and on days Bakugou had caught Deku leaving with All Might in the corner of his eyes, Deku didn’t bother asking him to lunch anymore afterwards. Instead Deku would happily bounce off with Uraraka and Iida while Bakugou went off with Kirishima and Kaminari.

Bakugou was a little grateful Deku got the message and also a little hurt. Still, he didn’t approach him, and they seemed to be in a mutual understanding of this arrangement. However, the oddity of it didn’t seem to miss the class.

Unfortunately for him, Class 1-A have had front row tickets to the Ballad of Kacchan and Deku since the beginning of time, so they’ve watched the two from the first fight on Ground-Beta, to the unwavering and strange amount of closeness that grew between the childhood friends after the second one. So for them to have distanced again caught everyone’s attention.

Especially All Might and Aizawa’s, as he started to notice them whispering after class and looking in Bakugou’s direction.

The weight of it, the weird stares, and Deku being blatantly fucking obvious about his irritation was driving Bakugou mad, but he was going to keep his cool, he was going to hold it off until the sight of Deku leaving the classroom didn’t make his heart drop. He was going to keep it up until looking at old text messages didn’t make his heart beat, and until hearing Deku laugh with others while he wasn’t involved didn’t make him want to drag himself towards the sound just for the sake of being closer to it, he was going to keep it up until this feeling of longing dissipated into fucking nothingness.

He contemplated this, prided himself on this ready and sure of it until once again, the universe decided fuck all, its time to kick this shit in the ass once and for all.

“Bakugou, Midoriya, today you two will stay after school to put up the desks and clean up,” Aizawa had dragged out as soon as class ended.

Bakugou froze from getting his things looking angrily and painfully in Aizawa direction, hoping maybe the daggers in his eyes would force the teacher to take back his statement or at least pair him with someone else.

From behind, Deku only looked blankly ahead.

“Yessir,” Deku replied immediately.

“Be sure to lock up when you two are done,” the teacher finished, gathering his things and dismissing the class.

He wasn’t going to get out of this, he was completely fucked.

So when the school had finally emptied and Deku and Bakugou were left alone setting up the tables and chairs he wasn’t surprised when Deku finally piped up with the question after only a few moments of silence.

“So, are you going to tell me the problem or what?”

Bakugou whipped around expecting to see Deku’s back and ended up being a little taken aback when he saw Deku standing defiantly in his direction, rocking one chair back and forth on its heels.

Bakugou puffed out his chest taking in a deep breath, ready to tell Deku to mind his fucking business and put the chairs up, but Deku only cocked his eyebrow, the irritation in his eyes forced Bakugou to back track. The words wouldn’t have escaped his mouth like he wanted with Deku looking at him like that, the anger Deku was feeling was seeping its way in Bakugou’s own heart, mirroring it, and unlocking every bit of frustration he’s held in for all these months. If Bakugou responded to that, he would spill everything in the most ungraceful and ugly manner known to man.

So instead he hid himself again, swerving around and slamming a chair backwards on a desk to release a little anger.

“I need you to get away from me,” he started, and hearing Deku’s mouth open to retaliate he continued, “just … fucking go wait outside in the hall or something and let me figure this the fuck out, shit,”

Looking down, he walked in Deku’s direction and snatched the chair that Deku was irritably rocking around from his hands, and Deku just glared daggers into him confusingly.

“Just fucking wait! I’ll do your half, but if you want to hear anything from me you need to give me like 15 damn minutes out of your presence.”

Deku looked like he wanted to argue, but sighing he relaxed his glare and reluctantly resigned.

“Fine,” he huffed, stepping backwards and then turning to exit the classroom.

When Deku had finally left, Bakugou kicked one of the chair away in frustration and screamed a “SHIT” loud enough he knew Deku probably heard on the other side.

Bakugou had to tell him the truth now, and he hadn’t thought this far ahead. In all his avoiding the issue he knew the eventual solution was going to be confessing, but he hadn’t planned for a second how he would. Could he get away with telling Deku he was over it now and they could move the hell on?

Slamming a chair down he realized, no. You don’t just avoid someone for 2 months without explanation and then demand 15 minutes of breathing room over feelings you just “got over”.

So what does he say?

Deku I like you.

Is that enough?

Deku I lo-

Accidentally screeching a seat across the floor a little louder than intended he decided “like” was definitely enough. That was the word he needed to use, or something similar.

“’Deku, I like you’, no fuck that sounds fucking ditsy I need to-,” Bakugou was muttering to himself while setting up the last of the chairs, “’You’ve really been pissing me off lately and’ – No... ‘It’s not fucking you its me, about you, so I guess it’s all your fucking fault in the end again huh? – gah NO, SHIT!”

Bakugou kept up rehearsing to himself all through setting up the chairs and sweeping, by the time he finished the last of the work he was sure he came up with the best way to put his makeshift and rushed confession.

“ ‘Deku, you piece of shit, I know it sounds fucking insane but I think I got a stupid puppy crush on you and it was pissing me off, that’s it.’ Yeah, perfect.”

Bakugou cheered to himself, muttering ‘Deku, you piece of shit’ to keep himself confident as he stepped out of the door to the classroom to meet with Deku in the hallway and finally shoot this circus act in the foot.

He was ready to meet with Deku’s anger, he was ready to put this shit out there and leave it to rot. Maybe with the way he says it Deku will blow up in his face and they can put it behind them, chalk it up as one big mistake, and let it all die.

He imagined how it would play out, put up the barriers needed to take Deku’s anger head on, he deserved it, he wanted it, he was prepared for it.

But of course, nothing could ever go as he wanted.

Why didn’t anything ever go as he wanted.

Walking out to the hall, instead of being met with Deku standing tall with fire in his eyes, he was met with the boy leaning casually right outside the door, his eyes blank.

And when he noticed Bakugou’s presence he looked at the taller boy with a quiet sadness in his eyes.

“So?” he demanded, his voice cracking a bit.

Bakugou’s plan got erased immediately, again. Everything about him and his demeanor slackened in Deku’s presence and he simply stood there, frozen.

Deku pushed himself off the wall to step back from Bakugou, only a slight bit of determination glinting from his eyes mixed in with the gloom he was pushing down.

“Kacchan, you have to tell me what’s wrong,” Deku started calmly, despite the look in his eyes.

He’d done it again.

They were supposed to have been well passed this already.

Deku values his friendships, and Bakugou knew more than anyone else how much that annoyingly dangerous passion outreached, he was foolish to assume Deku would only be angry with him.

Because Deku’s never been like that, Deku’s never kept up long enough to only be angry, not with him, not with anyone and Bakugou should have known better.

But in the face of Deku’s emotions like this, once again his heart began to mirror his own, and Bakugou felt an uncontrollable amount of guilt rush over him.

Not over not telling Deku, not over avoiding him, but for just not being unfront with himself fucking again about Deku.

Deku wasn’t the one doing this to him, he had been doing this to himself, and it was going to inevitability intertwined with Deku no matter how much he tried to leave it, no matter how much he tried to avoid it.

Their feelings had always been inevitably connected like this.

And he had to get over it.

He had to accept it here in it's fullest form.

He took a step forward, and Deku took a step back.

“Kacchan.” Deku started sternly.

“Please,” Kacchan replied fast and flat glaring the boy standing off with him in the eyes, and Deku taken only slightly aback by the vague desperation, let his guard down just a bit to let Bakugou make his way forward.

Words weren’t going to work, he was messy with those, the intimacy and carefulness of the language always managed to miss him, and he couldn’t trust his own heart to say what he felt, so instead he moved forward.

Getting eye to eye with deku, he only looked down slightly. The boy wasn’t that much shorter than him, but enough so that he had to lean forward and down enough to make this comfortable.

“Kacchan?” Deku whispered.

Wordlessly, Bakugou let his arms go past Deku’s waist to wrap around the bottom of his back, biting his lip Bakugou dragged Deku into his chest and embraced him into a tight hug.

Deku shocked, didn’t know where to place his hands for a moment, and Bakugou shakingly buried his face into the crook of Deku’s neck so his eyes couldn’t be shown.

Deku finally resigned to placing his hands lightly on Bakugou’s back, using one to pat him gently.

“I missed you too,” Deku whispered, causing a shiver to run down Bakugou’s spine, “but this still isn’t explaining anything,”

Bakugou huffed and tightened his hold.

“Stop me,” Bakugou muttered into Deku’s shoulder.

“Hm?” Deku questioned, now lowering his hands down Bakugou’s back for a more casual hold.

“Do that thing you do where you call me an idiot, tell me this is stupid,”

“I still don’t know what it is Kacchan,” Deku replied, a little bit of the irritation returning, “you’re a dumbass, but you still need to tell me so I can tell you all the reasons why,”

Bakugou huffed a small laughter in Deku’s shoulder at his response, and they stood silent embraced in the hug for a long period of silence before Bakugou finally began shifting.

He loosened his grip slightly to give himself room, and while continuing to avoid Deku’s gaze, he pressed a small kiss to Deku’s jawline before immediately retreating into the hug tightening his grip, causing Deku to puff out a slight bit of air.

“O-oh.” Deku huffed.

“Shit, fuck, goddammit!” Bakugou spat curses into Deku’s shoulder regretting the action.

There was a longer silence, neither boy had broken from the hug.

Deku pat Bakugou’s back twice.

Pity, of course, he should have known that was coming, fucking Deku alwa-

Deku pat his back three more times, a little harder than last time.

What was he trying to be encouraging now? Like Bakugou needed to be reassured his ugly feelings were okay or someshit? Why didn’t he just-

Deku was now frantically patting Bakugou’s back to a point where it was starting to actually kind of fucking sting.

Irritated, Bakugou broke from his hiding place in Deku’s shoulder to meet with Deku face to face.

“DEKU, what the fuck are y-,”

Bakugou was interrupted by a foreign press of lips on his, rough and unaimed, but enough to get his eyes wide as the attacker leaned back from the kiss with the fire in his eyes that he had been searching for earlier.

“Are you kidding me?!” Deku screamed in Bakugou’s face.

Bakugou was a little dumbfounded by the action to reply properly, did… Deku just…

“Uh…” Bakugou groaned dazed, hands hanging lazily over Deku’s waist now.

Deku moved the hands that were wrapped around Bakugou’s back to roughly cup both of Bakugou’s cheeks in his palms.

“You idiot!”

Deku kissed Bakugou roughly again a little more aimed and calculated, holding a little longer, before breaking apart again with an irritated grunt.

“That’s why you’ve been avoiding me all this time?” he hissed, “You’re terrible!”

Everything was still moving a little too fast.

“Did… what the fuck did you just…”

Deku groaned exasperatedly and pressed roughly feathered kisses all over Bakugou’s face, they got softer and softer with each press of lips to skin before Deku slowly relaxed on his own and pulled back, dropping his hands from Bakugou’s face to his back again, pulling himself into Bakugou’s chest for another tight embrace.

“Me too…Kacchan,” Deku murmured, the irritation still scrunched in his eyebrows but a new softness showing in his eyes.

Bakugou was coming out of his daze enough to process that statement, and in a moment’s hesitation, he pulled the boy back from the hug and looked seriously at Deku in his eyes.

“You...ah shit," he to a second to catch himself, "you...like me?”

“And you like me?” Deku immediately retaliated, not letting Bakugou turn the responsibility of answering first on him.

Bakugou took in a breath before answering in a whisper, “...yeah,”

Deku sighed tiredly.

“Good, me too,” Deku grunted giving Bakugou a small peck on the nose, “I thought it was pretty obvious but for some reason you need these confessions spelled out to you,”

He finished that last sentence with a fake laugh, and Bakugou felt his heart beat again at the sound of even a hint of the boy’s laughter despite it's ingenuity. A mix of the fondness, irritation, frustration and longing that had all existed and were building up in the months came pouring over him and he tightened his grip on Deku, pulling him close again.

Obvious? Bullshit, this asshole wasn’t obvious about anything in his heart, he was enigma, a completely incomprehensible tool, how dare he?

“Shut the fuck up, I’ve been fucking suffering, you weren’t obvious, you piece of shit, you fuckface, stupid Deku,” Bakugou finished his sentence doubling on Deku’s prior action and kissing the him on the lips. Maybe a little rougher than Deku had, so much so it had the boy leaning backwards into Bakugou’s tight grip.

The frown that had been across Deku’s face turned into an uncontrollable smile as Bakugou let the kiss linger, but needing to breathe he started slapping at Bakugou’s back again.

“Kacchan!” he laughed against Bakugou’s lips, “Off, off!”

At that, Bakugou slowly and hesitantly pulled off, not realizing he practically had the other boy caught in something of a dip in his arms.

They looked at each other like that for a minute, taking in the look of each other’s faces.

Bakugou’s eyes were jaded but wide, as though he had dispelled every emotion he had into that one kiss and was in the process of recharging for the next one.

Deku on the other hand, had just got finished laughing and was smiling up at Bakugou with a gleam and fondness that Bakugou had never seen before. It was new look to be added to the book of things that made Bakugou lose all the strength in his heart and it got tattooed it in his brain as a permanent sight like everything else with Deku did.

However, while the smile remained the look in Deku’s eyes began turning sad again.

“I wish you talked to me,” he cracked.

“Oh…,” Bakugou breathed, realizing the source of the original issue came from him again and he punched himself mentally, “I…fuck…I,”

Bakugou danced around for the right words, there was an easier way to say just “Im sorry” but instead he opted for the way more complicated route.

“I fucked up,” he groaned, looking away, “I fucked up…because I was weak and…,”

Despite himself, Bakugou looked back at Deku from the corner of his eyes to see the boy has lost the smile and was contorting his look to annoyance again before even letting Bakugou finish his sentence.

“It was because I was fucking weak,” Bakugou reemphasized just as annoyed that Deku was looking at him sideways, “and I didn’t tackle it head on when I should have, but I don’t make the same mistake fucking twice so,”

He lifted Deku from the tilt in his arms and looked him in the eye as he finished with a promise,

“I’ll get stronger,”

Deku twitched his lip looking a bit exhausted and unsatisfied with the response, before his eyes seemed to glimmer with some type of understanding and it all finally molded itself into a smile.

“Everything’s a different kind of battle to you isn’t it?”

“Yeah and you’re my worst enemy,” Bakugou spat back, putting his forehead to Deku’s roughly and closing his eyes, “fucking exhausting, fucking stupid,”

Deku returned the gesture by leaning into the touch a bit more softly, and sighing with a laugh.

“Yeah, and I guess you’re just my idiot, so it works out in the end.”

---

“I’m sorry, by the way,” Deku started as they trudged back to the dorms hand in hand.

“What the hell are you apologizing for?” Bakugou replied, meaning to sound a little more aggressive and irritated by the question but he was still a little drunk off the scene in the hallway.

“Well… I think All Might may have put Aizawa-sensei up to this…haha…” Deku continued nervously tensing his grip on Bakugou’s hand, “I was really kinda um…mad?”

“Wow, really? Couldn’t fucking tell from the way you almost ate my face,”

“I wasn’t that mad then,”

“Well you looked like you wanted to throw that chair at me earlier,”

“Uhm,” Deku coughed into his hand changing the banter subject from the chair, “Anyways, I kind of vented to him because it was effecting my training a bit and he noticed,”

Bakugou felt a little drop in his chest at the thought that Deku may have been disappointing All Might with his work ethic over Bakugou’s hissy fit.

“I accidentally broke like 10 punching bags in one session, All Might looked a little terrified,” Deku laughed.

Bakugou imagined an infuriated Deku sending 100lb bags of dirt flying one by one and wouldn’t admit for a second that he probably would have been looking like All Might supposedly had been.

“So I really think he consulted Aizawa-sensei about it, which is why we were forced so suddenly,” Deku scratched under his chin with his free hand thoughtfully, “they seem to do that a lot, huh?”

“Those old men need to stay out of our fucking business,” Bakugou muttered.

“I guess so, but they kinda know best it looks like,” Deku mused leaning into Bakugou, “who knows how long you have taken on your own?”

“Be quiet, get off me,” Bakugou grunted leaning his head into Deku’s anyways.

Intertwined fingers, the sunset, the sound of the clinging gates, and all of the silence Bakugou had dreaded before was now draping over him comfortably with Deku by his side again, closer even so.

Falling for Deku hadn’t been easy.

Getting here was rough. The misunderstandings, the stubbornness, having everything about who they were torn apart and blown up until they were left with nothing but the reality and its painful fire burning into their skin until someone finally gave in to turn and put it out. The details of that are gritty and long, but you already know that.

Yeah, even after all of that everything was a natural and simple transition.

Like the way Deku’s hand fit perfectly into his, the way they bounced off each other’s enthusiasm over the tiniest things, the way Deku looked at him, the way Deku kissed and held him.

Yeah, a long time of these kind of things went on before liking Deku became second nature to him, another instinct drilled into his very core before he knew it, the passion, the fire, the adrenaline, even the tenderness and care, he grew used to these things as an essential part of his life, as something he didn’t have to battle against or push away.

Bakugou could live with this.

So much so, that the thought one day the final barrier that existed between him and his feelings for Deku would finally come tumbling down.

The one thing he still feared, but did not deny.

The thought that, after some time he would be able to peg a word on his feelings for Deku with the intensity he truly felt, and put the weight of those feelings into a more attainable and accurate context than just a crush, than just liking him.

And whenever he heard the familiar annoying ass laugh, that familiar annoying ass smile, and that now familiar brush of fingers interlacing with his own, he thought that day just might come someday, and someday soon.

It just might.

#katsudeku #bakudeku #izukatsu #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #wolf writes

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wilshipley · 7 years ago

Text

The Bachelor, Season 22, Episode 2

“Tonight on The Bachelor...” skip skip skip once is enough “...it's all coming up tonight on The Bachelor.”

EXTERIOR, PEREGRINE FALCON: Why?

We hear the famous red-tailed hawk scream that lazy foley people have used for decades. Ari's in the scrubby mountains astride an ugly Harley-Davidson P.O.S. and I'm sorry if you like Harleys but seriously they're loud and heavy and don't perform very well and every single one I've seen in town is ridden obnoxiously. We've got a guy here in the Castro who rides a red one and at 2am almost nightly he'll rev his engine again and again for up to a half hour, for no reason except to annoy everyone. It’s not like I’m a motorcycle hater, I rode a Duck for many years but Harleys are just stupid.

EXTERIOR, MANSION: The women toast each other “to love.” Sure, lotta love in this room. We get quick cuts of the women saying they like Ari. This is a huge surprise, HUGE.

Chris calls the hoard inside: “The hope is that just one of you will be Ari's wife.” Wait, so still no polygamy on this show? Jesus, what year is this. “...and that's the craziest thing to say to 21 people sitting before you,” add Chris, apparently overlooking, “I have a spatula and I will spank all your bottoms until you admit the moon landing is fake, you arugula pirates.”

Bekah is looking super perky (enjoy this while you can). Bibiana confessions she wants a date, a big surprise on a dating show about dates. This is Bibiana’s episode so just assume if I elide something it’s a Bibana confessional. Also I have no idea if I’m spelling her name right or anyone else’s also I kinda don’t care?

Hot Mess Chelsea talks about how the producers *cough* I mean Ari gave her a rose last night because she's “a little bit mysterious” which is a funny way to pronounce “CRAY CRAY” but whatever.

Becca K. gets the first date card, all by her lonesome. She is...the publicist? Ok, I'm cheating and reading her title card, because I don't remember anyone but Bekah and the taxidermy gal, who I internally call “girlfriend #1″ and “girlfriend #2″ because I’m a lonely and sad man. I think maybe this Becca is the one who had him propose to her first thing out of the limo?

Ari drives off with Becca on “his” shitty motorcycle. Becca confessionals that she's happy to be paired with a “handsome race car driver” which seems like an oddly specific wish. Like, I've heard of having a type, but if your type is “handsome race car drivers with the IQs of 10-year-olds” then maybe time to rethink priorities.

Hot Mess is asked by the producers (via a proxy contestant) how she feels about Becca getting the motorcycle date. She doesn't disappoint them, “A little jealous...I love putting myself behind something a little bit more powerful than me.” I get she's that trying to sound naughty and exciting here but that construct doesn't make much sense. In what other situations are you putting yourself behind something more powerful than you? I mean, a car is more powerful than you, so do you love it every time you walk up behind your car? What about tractors? Does being behind a tractor get your crank going?

Unbelievably Insane Krystal tells the women that her dad was in a motorcycle accident so she wouldn't be down with going on the ride today and it goes over like a lead balloon in a hospital ward of people suffering from lead poisoning who also are afraid of balloons. One of the assembled women kinda slowly says something like: I...guess...it’s...good...you’re...not...going? because how do you respond to that.

Ari takes Becca to, like, a loft or something they rented out? And introduces her to MEGA-superstar designer Rachel Zoe who I'm sure you've all heard of without googling her because OMG she dresses the stars or something? Becca is supposed to pick out a dress for the evening, from among a ton of very, very sparkly dresses. Rachel Zoe has never met a sequin she didn't like.

After some dress-trying-on Ari tells Becca that she'll get to keep all the dresses and then gives her some spiky Louboutins which even I know are super-goddam-fancy. This is an awesome set-up by the producers — the first woman they pick is a nice, small-town, inoffensive gal it'd be hard for anyone to dislike, and she's getting a classic small-town-gal / “Pretty Woman” scenario without the pesky whoring of the original. Also this sets us up for DRAMA because she's getting like $15,000 or so worth of stuff and I'm now completely convinced the next group date is going to be the women shoveling actual shit (they've done it before!) just to make the other women super jealous.

Ari lies about how much he wanted to spoil her with this date as if he set up Rachel Zoe and paid for the dresses himself, hah hah. Now some Very Serious Dude approaches them with glasses on carrying a briefcase: “Neil Lane sends his regards.” I expect him to shoot them both but instead he gives Becca earrings, which is disappointing but maybe more in tune with the audience. Ari then spends a lot of time brushing her hair away from her ear so the camera can see the earrings that NEIL LANE gave her. Did we mention Neil Lane enough? Because he’s no longer satisfied to just appear at the end of the show with his goddam blood diamond rings. They kiss and he holds her hair back, which is something I usually reserve for...well, not kissing. But those NEIL LANE earrings! They gotta be seen!

Becca totters into mansion full of women the carrying her metric ton of loot and admits she was "more nervous to come back here," which makes sense. But the producers fail to get any catty quotes from the women and actually they all seem kinda excited, so, like, foiled again!

Becca confessionals she's nervous to see Ari again on their evening date. “It's like the butterfly nerves.” I don't know what those are? I've heard of having butterflies and having nerves but not butterfly nerves. Are butterflies known for their nerves? I mean basically they land on flowers and drink sugar water all day. It seems pretty chill.

Ari plies a sparkly necklace onto Becca because apparently she doesn't have enough phat loot. She says, “I was told you can fix my brakes on my car,” and I'm like damn woman how much more do you need here? I've had women literally offer to make sex tapes for me just if I bought them Louboutins. (I declined—I mean, those things are expensive! Oh also I have my pride, ahem, right that too.)

—

INTERIOR, MANSION: Literally Insane Krystal gets the date card. She can't stop talking in a combination of up-speak and baby talk and it's so grating I can't believe I'm voluntarily watching this. I would run a mile to avoid her. She also looks to me like she's had a LOT of elective face surgery, because her smile is completely uncanny valley, and that’s a pretty scary thing for a woman in her 20′s. Look, I know there are impossible standards of beauty in our society for women, but when you start cutting up your face and turning it into an hideous plastic mask, well, that’s crazy town.

—

DATE, NIGHTTIME: Becca (we’re still on her date) is telling Ari about her dad's death from cancer because that's super hot. Becca is a nice gal and possibly as simple as Ari, they seem like a fine couple to me. I have nothing mean to say about her, except I think her cross wrist tattoo is dumb but I pretty much don't like any tattoos, so. Somewhere in all this he gives Becca the rose.

Ari tells Becca she gets to keep the earrings (I bet she assumed it at this point, because she’s making out like a damn bandit) and then he pulls a handle in the bizarre loft thing they’re in and confetti flies everywhere because who doesn't end dinner with confetti? That's not at all strange.

—

INTERIOR, MANSION, MORNING: Unbelievably insane Krystal is strutting around the mansion and talking in her baby voice. It sounds like, “Mwah mwah mwah mwah mwah.”

She's driven to a plane. “HiiiiIIIiiiIIiiiii. Oh my gooooooooooooosh,” she minces to Ari. (Today she’s flying Air Ari.)

Let's pause here. I've been watching this show “UNreal” which is co-created by an ex-PA from The Bachelor and although it's a bit crazier than the real Bachelor it does show how much the PAs interfere and connive and this whole Krystal thing makes me super uncomfortable because of it.

Krystal has, in my opinion, real personality problems. All my alarms go off with her. So the producers are like, OMG, she feels abandoned by her family, she was an abused kid, she's vulnerable now, she has a huge aching need to be liked, LET'S SEND HER TO ARI'S HOMETOWN TO SEE HIS HOUSE AND MEET HIS FAMILY ON THE FIRST DATE because she'll get nuttily attached and when she gets back she'll be a complete bunny-boiler.

Krystal: “It's crazy to think if I lived with Ari, this...could be my life!” EEEEEEK RUN A MILE DUDE RUN A MILE.

Krystal is just SOOOoOOOoooOOoOOO excited to see his home videos and his photo albums, which are oddly analog (he's not THAT old).

Now they're outside his parents’ house. This is just disgusting me. She meets the whole extended family and she's SO EXCITED OH MY GooOOOOooOOD. Krystal asks the parents, “How did you guys meeettttttt?” and I've never heard anyone drag the final consonant (fricative?) like that I feel like she wanted to do a baby talk/upspeak version of that phrase but she ran out of words before she got a chance to add any annoying fake verbal contrivances so she panicked and dragged out the t.

—

INTERIOR, MANSION: Women are figuring out who hasn't gone on a date. A date card arrives, pretty much all women are on it. “Let’s hit love head-on!” it says. Spoilers: they actually back into it, which would have made a funnier date card tag line. Like, “You're fine mother-flippers, why don't you back dat ass up?”

—

EXTERIOR, LA: Krystal: “Where are we goIIIIIING?" They're having dinner at the Bradbury which is like the coolest place ever and now it's been tainted by their bullshit and I’m pissed. They didn't even mention Blade Runner so they're double-dead to me.

Krystal cryfessionals that she's afraid to open up to Ari which, like, GO WITH THAT FEELING, GIRL. YOU ARE CRAZY MAYBE KEEP IT TO YOURSELF.

But instead Krystal tells the story of how her family split up and her parents were neglectful and she later found out her brother was living on the street and couldn't figure out how to save him. Of course this is a legitimately sad story but MAYBE not what you share on national TV and/or a first date but whatever.

The issue here is Krystal is obviously incredibly damaged by her past and she should never have been put on this show. She's not a "ha ha hot mess" pretend villain she's a genuinely messed up person and this is the last thing she needs. She needs help and support not to be deprived of sleep and competing with other women and filled with booze.

Ok, Ari is actually being a gentleman about her crazy history and she's melting in his affection and he has no idea the fire he's lighting. Not yet.

He gives her the date rose, and applies some tongue therapy to her. “It was an easy choice to give Krystal the rose, she really was vulnerable...” no no no gonna stop you right there.

They walk to a small theater somewhere and CONNER DERMIT is on-stage, singing his hit song, You've never heard of me, have you? They slow dance to Conner's crooning and I'd like to give a big shout-out to "Audio Rents" in LA who managed to put a big green sticker on Conner's mic right where the camera could see it perfectly. Maybe after this gig Conner can afford his own microphone! They’re not that expensive, Conner, I have a nice Shure one myself and I don’t even sing.

Krystal confessionals how she's held back in love but her speech patterns are so bizarre that I'm amazed how much she sounds like Jason Mendoza on The Good Place. I wonder if she watches that show and is like, “Gosh, he's my hero. He really get it.”

—

INTERIOR, MANSION: Krystal confessionals, “It felt really amazing this morniNNNNNg: waking up, and having my rose?” She should maybe have breakfast cereal instead of roses.

The women are grilling Krystal but she won't tell them anything about her date, she claims it's personal and private (a-OOOG-ah! a-OOOG-ah! Red flag!) but I suspect also because she kinda can't remember things from a day ago or even when they leave her field of vision?

—

This also marks the spot where producers have had a talk with Bekah about her boobs so the rest of the show she is no longer so perky. I imagine the conversation went a lot like this.

—

Most of the remaining horde is now piled into a bus, wearing sporty outfits. They're going to participate in a demolition derby! This seems...kinda insanely dangerous? I mean, they're taking precautions, but still.

Bekah has managed to find a way to be far skimpilier-dressed than all the other women — she's wearing shorty-short-shorts vs. everyone else’s yoga pants. I admire her tenacity. It's like the old saying, "When god closes the door on no bras, he opens up a window into micro-bootie shorts."

(I'd like to mention I'm in no way trying to "slut-shame" Bekah — she's a very fit person and I'm super-stoked she's so comfortable in her own body. SUPER DUPER stoked.)

Ari pulls up in his beater car with great fanfare. The women are all told to paint their cars and then smash into each other until their cars don't move. Again, this seems pretty dangerous.

Annaleise has a breakdown and is crying and doesn't want to do this. Now, this is a legitimate thing because smashing cars is pretty dangerous and I'm sorry I know I'm going to hell but I can't take her seriously here...because: Mikel(?) is nominated to lob her the softball, "If you don't mind me asking, why are you so scared?" And Annaleise is off! I'll just summarize: when she was little she was on bumper cars and her car was "trapped" in middle of other cars and she was upset.

The producers dramatize the story with a nightmare video sequence of bumper cars and screaming where they're clearly mocking her, then they switch to some of the women openly mocking her in confessionals because the producers aren't allowed to just get on-camera and openly mock the contestants themselves, so this is as close as they can come. Who knows if anything bad actually happened to Annaleise and the producers just cut it to look like she’s trying to get attention? Not me.

Ari comes and comforts Annaleise and she decides she can do it after all. Hmmm.

—

Ari instructs the women to back into other cars because all the good stuff is in front. I'd beg to differ, but to each his own.

Cars bump. Some women are especially aggressive, including Bibiana which is funny because she doesn't have a driver's license.

“Annaleise took a big one in the back right there!” says the announcer and I'm not touching that. Annaleise smashes a ton of cars and ends up having fun.

Sienne wins. They show Sienne taking a victory lap and the lazy foley person twice dubs in the sound of tires screeching on the mud field. C'mon.

There’s a group shot with all the women in their fireproof racing suits and Bekah is the only one who’s taken her top down. I really appreciate the extra effort Bekah always puts in. She's like that Matt Damon impression of Matthew McConaughey: "Today's scene, I think it'd be a good opportunity for me to take my shirt off."

—

EXTERIOR, CASTLE(?), NIGHT: What is this place? LA Castle?

INTERIOR, CASTLE(?): Brittany couldn't make it to the afterparty because apparently she hurt herself on the track today. I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO.

We see a lot of confessionals from Bibiana because they're setting up some major DRAMA. Hot Mess Chelsea grabs Ari first again and of course everyone is pissed, but Chelsea hasn't even seen crazy yet. Oh she’s about to be overshadowed big time.

Chelsea tells Ari about her kid. Wheee, what a shocker. We already know Ari's a MILF-hunter, thanks to Emily. Chelsea tells the group how she opened up to Ari about how she left her kid to be here with him and Mikhel(sp?) the very beautiful chef is having none of it and is all "we all gave something up!" You go girl.

Sienne is talking to Ari and she went to Yale and he's like, "I had a cousin in Yale...his name was Yim Yonson!" (Not really.) But it's pretty clear she's WAYYYY to smart for him. Ari actually says (to camera) "I barely graduated high school and worked a Pizza Hut," and you gotta give it to him, he knows his limits. He gives her the old smooches, though, because chix can’t resist the smooches.

We see a big montage of women talking to Ari but in the context of Bibiana having a meltdown because she hasn't gotten any time with Ari. She's M-A-D MAD. I mean, I don't blame her, I'd be totally over this show from the first word, but it’s good TV so have a lot of hot-headed Latina action. My hotheaded Latina friend is watching with me and I’m actually afraid I’m going to catch some fallout from her sympathetic anger for Bibiana.

Now Ari is telling Bekah she's sexy. Her voice is like ear whiskey. They start smooching and the camera does NOT pull away. It's a LONG and WET and SLURPY kiss. I think she's pregnant now?

Cut away: Ari picks up the date rose, “Chelsea: You really opened up to me [more stuff]...and um, Sienne [more stuff] you impressed me today,” and he gives the rose to Sienne. What the hell was with mentioning Chelsea first? Why did he pick out just one woman to mention before the one he was actually giving the rose to? Seems like a dick move.

—

MANSION, NIGHT: montage of women talking about Ari and the politics of rose night.

Ari is a simple man and gives a simple speech to the women. Blah blah rose time is coming.

Ari first talks to Brittany who had the unspecified demolition injury. He gives her a certificate that says "Most Hardcore," and tells her "You can hang it in your room!" because he really is a 10-year-old and his room has all kinds of trophies and certificates on the wall from boy scouts and the like. Also probably an award from Pizza Hut for being “Most Meh Employee.”

Now Ari and Bekah are talking and her voice is so sexy I think I am pregnant. Ari tells her he wasn't sure if she liked him and she’s all no you’re silly and I want to throw up and finally they get back to smooching because seriously they have nothing to say to each other. Smooching sitting down, smooching against the wall, they smooch and smooch. Bekah knows how to smooch. I give this three more episodes before she realizes how boring he is. Bekah: "I'm simple, no drama; I'm easy to please.” Apparently really easy to please.

More Bibiana feeling upset about not getting time with Ari. The whole arc tonight is about Bibiana wanting time and will she get cut?

Krystal confessionals that she's going to talk to Ari some more at the cocktail party even though she has a rose and had a whole day with him. Her voice intonations are seriously crazy. She is unhinged. I think alcohol is messing with the medications I hope she takes. Krystal interrupts Lauren B. who "didn't even have a date this week."

Bibiana confessionals she thinks Krystal is a "selfish BIiiiIITCH" (emphasis hers) and I think that's the first time I've heard that word on this show? The Bachelor’s a pretty conservative show considering how obnoxious it is (c.f. blurring side-boob), which is actually kinda the M.O. of all conservatives, really.

Krystal is crazy-talking to Ari and as far as we see he doesn't kiss he — it seems like he's wising up. The scenes they show he seems more “placating” than “snuggling.” She talks to the other girls about her visit with Ari and her tone is so bizarre I can't even watch it.

We see Mikel(sp?) the beautiful chef asking Ari what color his underwear is and I feel like she's not really making good use of her time here. She's the most gorgeous woman on the show but the fact that they've only shown her say one thing per episode (and it’s been lame each time) means she didn't last long (remember they cut all these shows after the show has wrapped). Ari is the kind of dude who looks at a bucket of fried chicken and is all, "Mmm, I like that dry, tasteless white meat!” so I just don’t think Mikhel lasted long.

The taxidermy woman brings him a stuffed dead thing which I think is great. She's my definite backup after Bekah rejects me. Uh, I mean my first choice? Sorry taxidermy woman whose name I've forgotten. Lauren? I want to say Lauren. Anyhow I love you baby it was always you.

Bibiana finally gets time with Ari. Lots of fanfare. Ari's talking about having his dog in LA with him. Krystal pops her head in. "Hi guysssssss? Do you mind if I...stepped in for a momennnnnnt?" I feel like the producers MUST have put her up to this one, especially because we didn’t see Krystal planning it with the other women and I’m 90% sure Krystal couldn’t open a door without making a plan of attack first. Bibiana respond, “I actually do,” and even Ari says, “Yah, just one minute.” He's starting to. Realize. The. Mistake. He. Has. Made.

Bibiana confessionals how much she thinks Krystal sucks. Krystal says to Ari, “I just...only had a minute and I just...couldn't imagine...going into the rose ceremony even though I already had a rOOOoooose...” and it goes on like that.

Krystal comes out and joins the women and Bibiana tells her off. You can guess how that goes. Bibiana is furious. “When you learn to speak to me like a normal human being and not with a fake tone I can actually respect you and listen to what you have to say but if you really think I'm going to fall for this little ‘Lalalalalalaalalal’ [Bibiana shakes her head side to side] you HAVE to be kidding me.”

It’s not the most eloquent speech but I mean maybe it's healthy for Krystal to hear it straight from someone. She’s got to drop this baby/upspeak act if she’s going to join the human race. I honestly don't see Krystal as a villain, she’s a victim in this — a truly hurting person who doesn’t have the tools to deal with this kind of situation.

Bibiana tells her off a bunch. It hurts because, again, Krystal isn’t an evil person, she's just really messed up and needy.

Ari is summing up the evening with Chris: “Some have exceeded my expectations, and then some have slipped back a little bit.” When Ari says the latter the producers cut forward to Krystal in the lineup holding her rose, which in this case I don't think is much of a stretch — I think even simple Ari has started to realize that Krystal is WAY over-invested in this. If you've ever seen “Blue Jasmine” (the last Woody movie I could manage to watch, thanks for being such a dick Woody I used to really look up to you) Krystal is basically Cate Blanchett's part in this except it’s not a movie it’s her real life.

The women are lined up to be judged by a mediocre dude who likes to drive cars. Wheee.

🌹Maquel. 🌹Jacqueline. 🌹Bekah (DUH). 🌹Jenna. 🌹Chelsea. (I don't remember any of these women, sorry.) 🌹Lauren S. One of the Laurens! I think there's three? 🌹Tia! She's the not-Raven with not-surgery. 🌹Annaleise, who hates nicknames. 🌹Lauren B. I feel like I've never seen her. 🌹Kendal! The sexy fun quirky taxidermist. 🌹Brittney, the whiplash victim. 🌹Ashley, who was worried about going home but it turns out was fine. 🌹Marique, the super beautiful chef who will be cut next week and I'll be sad. 🌹Caroline. Don't feel bad if you don't remember her we've only seen her say like one thing.

Chris: "Ladies, Ari: this is the final rose tongiht."

MUSIC: BUM BUM BUM bum bum!

🌹Bibiana! What a shocker except not at all since they've cut the whole show to be about Bibiana.

Chris: "Ladies I'm sorry..." blah blah.

Some lady I don't recognize seems fine with being cut and hugs him and says goodbye. Maybe a Lauren? Seems like a safe bet. Valerie the server with a red wash in her hair who is SUPER beautiful hugs him goodbye. She reminds me of a movie star or someone else I like a lot and I'm sad to see her go but again we've never seen her say a single line on-camera so we can't be surprised.

The final blonde woman (maybe a Lauren?) is sniffling and stomps past Ari without saying goodbye. He can't abide this! All women must pay him obeisance, even if he just cut them. "Can you give me a sec!" says Ari to his throng as if the women had any ability to decide their own fates on this show, and follows her.

“Hey,” he confronts her. Her hands are on her hips. Ari: “I'm sorry! C'mere, give me a hug at least.” He grabs her clearly against her will. Not OK, Ari! I know you're 10 but you can't force women to hug you just because you feel bad that you made them feel bad. That's not OK!

Unknown possible-Lauren says, “Can...we...talk about it, at least?” and I’m now wondering why she blew past him if she wanted to talk? Ari pulls out the “I had to make tough choices" excuse and I feel like after 22 seasons the producers have a finely honed list of excuses they give the dudes to recite so they don't look like jerks.

Unknown woman says, “I’m not...sad about you, I'm sad about leaving my new friends,” which, I mean, that's a baller move and I respect it but you didn't really need to stop and ask him to talk if it’s true. You could have said it in the limo and it would have been badass.

Ari says, “I know you made friends, but at the end of the day it's more than that here, you know?” It's the second time he's said “end of the day” which is two more times than I've ever said it in my life because it's incredibly trite.

Also, why DON'T they let the rejected women stay in the house? That'd be freaking awesome. They could all carry on with the remaining women and dish and they wouldn't have to bullshit any more and it'd be hilarious. Also if some of us in the audience developed crushes on the less-bland women (*cough* Mikel *cough*) we’d be able to keep seeing them every week even after the main guy decided the only flavor he enjoys in vanilla.

“Okay, give me a hug!” Ari demands and grabs her. She doesn't, like, visibly move away but I'm still saying, don't demand hugs from women. You're not doing this for them, you're doing it so you can feel better, and that’s shitty. Hugs are intimate, don't demand intimacy from anyone.

Unknown possible-Lauren voiceovers “I got...broken up with, for the first time. So, like, shocked!" and look unknown woman I want to be on your side but yipes. First off, you did not get broken up with, you’ve barely spoken to this guy, you weren’t going out. Second off, if nobody's ever broken up with you maybe you have an issue? Like are you dating guys way beneath you, or do you end relationships early because you're afraid of being hurt or you get bored and need to move on? None of these are good looks. You should be dumped. It's part of learning and growing and figuring out what you want. I’m not ashamed I’ve been dumped, I’m only ashamed of the relationships I chickened out of that I should have stayed in.

Unknown possible Lauren: “I literally came into this thinking that I would end up with him,” well c'mon you just said you didn't like him and only liked the other women you're ruining this. She actually shows her fangs: “But he literally picked a [laughs] taxidermist over me.”

OH NO YOU DID NOT. Nobody attacks my #2 girlfriend! "Taxidermist lady" is awesome and creative and fun and she's WAY sexier than you if you want to be shallow. (Which I do, let’s be honest.)

"I just feel like I embarrassed myself." Well, not until you started tearing on the other women, you didn't.

Meanwhile, inside, Ari toasts to an amazing week, and how he's learned a lot about himself. His toast is amazingly Ari-centric, except maybe not amazing because he’s Ari, the 10-year-old.

Hopefully one of those things he’s learned is DO NOT TAKE CRAZY TO MEET YOUR PARENTS.

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