#sorry for essentially making this same post for the millionth time also it's just that everyday i see new people expressing this assumption

[fluentisonus]

not an uncommon idea to come across but I'm so fascinated by how much about this view of ancient history/culture/myth tradition is unintentionally & straightforwardly revealed by the phrase "and therefore the origin" here -- not just the assumption that these things exist in a strictly linear progression ("greece" exists then "rome" exists) where "greece" and "rome" are the only players (where does pre roman italy fit into this worldview? what room is there here for the influence of ancient north africa and west asia on greece? these places are effectively erased off the map), but the idea of greece as an "origin" of "art and mythology", that in greece it somehow developed whole cloth & completely undiluted by the sort of "cultural borrowing" they perceive the romans are doing. I always find this sort of view of greece as contextless & devoid of movement and trade until it comes time to pass the things they've apparently independently invented on to rome (or have it stolen as some would see it) frustrating, as well as the view of rome as a sort of copy pasted greece with no other influence or separate or preexisting traditions, really frustrating & honestly occasionally kind of sinister tbh

[letsdiscoverkitty]

"Life" Update - May 2021

This is the last of the three updates I have to post at the moment. If anyone actually reads these, especially in one go, you really do deserve a medal and I have no idea what I have done to deserve your kindness and support but THANK YOU SO MUCH (to all of you who are here, you are all truly wonderful and amazing) Okay, let's get going....

I suppose the title is a bit, well, overkill. To say that anyone has been had any sort of "life" over the past year would be a huge misuse of the word. The global pandemic has, quite literally, turned life upside down for the vast majority of people and I know that lockdowns, especially in the UK, have meant that anything other than what was deemed "essential" has been off the cards, which has hit us all hard.

I personally found it quite difficult whilst I was in hospital as although on the one hand it was good to know that there wasn't much that you were missing out on whilst locked on a ward with 15 minutes fresh air (if you were lucky), it did make it hard to find/hold onto motivation at times. Coupled with the fear of how my dad's condition would progress, whether he would make it and what sort of home life I would be going back to; the world suddenly felt even noisier than it had before (which I didn't think was really possible). The situation seemed to further heighten my fears as well as add to them. I found my mind was swamped with so many questions and fears, to then be asked about my future/what I wanted to do with my life (that classic question) and what my motivations were to get better, was too much. I fell blank.

I had completely lost myself and any shed of hope that was left inside of me. I tried to put on a smile; paint a different picture to the outside world but inside I was dark. I was hollow. I was empty.

What was the point? You never know what is waiting around the corner; everything can turn upside down overnight. What kind of 'life' would there be going back to anyway? Would it be possible to go to University anymore or would there still be multiple restrictions in place? would that make the huge financial costs worth it? What sort of society will we be coming out of the pandemic anyway? Will we even come out of this? Will people ever go back to offices again? Will we be able to see friends soon or go out to places? What about travelling? Fun? LIFE?

I found depression swamped me more than ever after dad's accident. I was trying to hold myself together for mum but I was losing all hope of anything ever being 'the same' or 'okay' again. In the end, the only reason I accepted the admission was for mum - I wanted to be able to support her with dad in hospital and us not know what the future held; as much as I wished I could be there all the time, I knew in the state I was that I couldn't. Initially I was told the admission would be a short one, that I could then go back home to support my mum through the family trauma...but that 4 weeks soon turned into over 8 months, which I still can't believe.

Gosh, I am sorry, I seem to have got a little distracted. This was meant to be the POSITIVE update. So let's get to those bits...

NEWS ONE: I HAVE A JOB (starting in Sept)

So whilst in hospital my consultant kept trying to get me to think about what I wanted to do with my life (just the small questions you know *lol*) - in her eyes she thought it would be risky to go back to University to do neuroscience/a degree so intense, and that instead I should think about doing something more creative, taking small steps to get a part time job and then go from there - which, as much as I hated to admit, I agreed with. However after one particularly bad run-in with the nutritionist when she decided to tell me that she didn't think I could achieve a life beyond Anorexia (it must have been mid-way-ish through my admission) blah blah blah (I get that she could have been trying to motivate me but there is a way to go about it and then there are ways to really not go about it and she chose the latter). Anyway, I was rather angry/mad and ended up doing basically trying to prove everyone wrong and started doing some research into my different options...

Long story short: I ended up applying to a degree apprenticeship scheme in business management...I've never really considered something like this before, perhaps partially because at school they drilled into me that business was a "soft" subject as it would not be looked upon very highly for Oxbridge applications *rolls eyes*. Thankfully I did a lot of research into Degree Apprenticeships a few years ago so I knew where to look online. Anyway, back to this application. I ended up going through the process/tests, somehow managing to make it through the initial online stages, then just before I was discharged I was invited to a online interview!

I only had a few days to do the interview before it timed out so I actually ended up doing it In the end the day after I was discharged (not ideal) and I was convinced that I had messed it up as it was one of those ones where you get shown the question for around 30 seconds before being given 2 minutes to respond - i.e. stress.pressure.anxiety.stumbling over words. HORRENDOUS.

I somehow passed the interview and the reviews before being invited to an online assessment centre in Feb, which spanned a whole day and included multiple interviews (the first was a strengths based interview with 2 interviewers for just over an hour - yuck!!!) as well as a presentation which we were given 24hrs in advance to prepare for (we were given 4 'topics'/questions and had to answer all of them in a 15 minute window using aids if we chose to, again to 2 (different) interviewers before having a 45 minute further interview - double yuck!)

Dare I say that I actually enjoyed the preparation for the presentation and the interviews?! It was so nice to have a focus and something to be working on that I was actually really beginning to connect with/want/see myself doing. The interviews and presentation themselves? HORRIBLE but the process reignited something within me. After the assessment centre day we were told it could be 7-10 working days to hear back from them - waiting for anything like this is just the worst so I wasn't looking forward to it and tried not to get my hopes up as these schemes are ridiculously hard to get into... Well, I got the call the next day saying that they were so impressed and out of something like 14,000 applications, I was offered one of the spaces on the scheme!! - I honestly still can't believe it and imposter syndrome is v real -

I know at the beginning of this I sounded very blase about the whole thing but as I progressed through the process, as I read more about the scheme and the business and what it would entail, the more I began to get excited. The more I realised how interesting it was and what an amazing opportunity it would be for me.

Despite this, I was also at the time, finishing up yet another an application to University (for the millionth time, I swear I must be a pro at these personal statements by now) this time for psychology and behavioural studies. This was before I got the offer of the degree apprenticeship scheme, which I knew was a long shot with only a handful of places given for thousands of applicants, so I felt I had to keep my options open (Neuro is still an area of fascination to me but not so much with the INTENSE LEVEL of physiology and pharmacology that I was doing at Bristol. Yes bits of it were good and interesting but that degree was ridiculous and, again, I felt far more drawn towards the behavioural studies and psychology when researching into Universities). I ended up getting 3 offers, 1 interview for Cambridge and 1 rejection (ironically from Bristol, even with my recommendation/support being from my previous personal tutor at Bristol!) - so I suddenly had options. And then the offer from the degree apprenticeship came through and there were even more options to choose from.

It honestly felt so surreal (and still does).

In the end, after a lot of thinking and debating and researching and talking, I decided to withdraw my University application and I accepted the degree apprenticeship role. Overall it is such an incredible opportunity that I knew I couldn't turn down, whereas University will always be there. I am actually getting a little excited about it (as well as extremely nervous, but I must say that the company has made a really positive/good impression thus far, even as far as creating MH podcasts with a psychologist for us and offering things like zoom baking sessions!).

So what is this degree apprenticeship? In short, it is a 3 year course during which I will have a Monday to Friday job at the company (for which the office is actually commutable from home - it is about 1hrs drive, which is not the best but it does mean that I can stay at home for at least the first year and there is a train I could get if I was too tired to do the drive all the time. As much as staying at home is not my long term plan it might help with the transition back to work/education to have a bit of stability and the support). During the first 2 years at the company we do four separate 6 month rotations in different areas to get lots of experience (marketing, supply chain, sales etc) whilst in the final year you get to put in a preference for where you would like to work for the year long placement. During this, every 6 or 7 weeks, we have to spend a week at University (which is not in commutable distance at all so the the company pays for our accommodation, travel and food during this time). As far as I have been told, we also get time during the working week allocated to do Uni work as well as our standard 'desk' jobs. Oh and not to mention one of the biggest sellers for degree apprenticeships....the company is basically sponsoring you so pays ALL of your tuition fees PLUS a basic salary! This means that you come out, in this case, with a Chartered business management degree, 3 years of hands-on work experience, as well as you being pretty much guaranteed a job within the company AND no student debt!!! How incredible is that? PLUS one big perk of the job is that they allow dogs in the office - I mean how could I say no to that?!!!!

So yes, by some magical miracle I actually have a job lined up for September! It still doesn't feel real and I am yet to fully process it. They don't know how it will be affected by COVID but the company did continue the programme last year (unlike some that postponed) so fingers crossed all should be going ahead. I have 'met' the other 4(?) who are on the scheme at my office as well and they seem lovely (including one other person who is my age/slightly older - which was such a relief as I was worried about it being only people just out of college).

I realise that it is going to be tough, I do not underestimate that at all, but I couldn't let anorexia still yet ANOTHER life milestone and opportunity away from me. There was a lot of questioning as to whether I should take it or not; I went back and forth between many spreadsheets that I made but I think this opportunity far outweighs going back to University. I have tried that route twice already and had to leave because of everything/haven't really coped (I think in some ways, being at Uni there is TOO MUCH free time and it allowed my perfectionism to run riot as I always felt like I was 'behind' in one way or another?). And that is not to mention that if I was going back to University, I would need to spend another 3-4 years studying, I would leave with little work experience or job in mind at the age of 29/30 with a mountain of debt.... And as I said before, I can always go back to University if I want to in the future/re train if I decide to, but this opportunity with a global company, well, this will never ever come my way again.

So yes that is my BIG BIG news. But I also have one more bit of news....

I'm getting a kitten. Yes, A KITTEN!!!!! I have so much more to say on this but for now you will have to wait and see. Photos will come when SHE does (a couple of weeks now)!!!

[tinylilemrys]

So due to some tumblr ask box fuckery, I published this prompt by accident this morning before I filled it, so the post format is a little off.

Anyway, here is the prompt from @softbeefeminist:

I have a whole list of reddie prompts but the one I've been thinking about the most today is never have I ever (I haven't seen a lot of the sleep over game trope for them which is odd because they're kids) Essentially they accidentally confess, possibly through a specific pointed never have I maybe Mike says he's never had a crush on a member of the club as a way to make Ben lose but accidentally winds up making all the losers put up a finger.

Thanks so much for this! It was really fun to write.

Never Have I Ever

Richie knew Bev was trying to catch him out before she even opened her mouth. She had that gleam in her eye that meant she was scheming and he braced himself accordingly.

“Never have I ever been so scared of Ronald McDonald that I hid behind my friends when we went for shakes and he was there doing a kids’ party.”

“Fuck off, Ringwald,” said Richie, putting up a finger for what felt like the millionth time since the game started. The Loser’s Club laughed and though Richie was used to losing at this game, it was starting to get ridiculous. It wasn’t his fault he was the friend who did all the crazy shit. Well, okay it kind of was, but that didn’t mean he should be punished for it. They were all staying over at his house – surely that should grant him some kind of immunity?

“Jesus, Rich, how many is that now – like fifteen?” laughed Eddie.

“Twenty,” Bev responded, wearing that shit-eating grin that Richie both hated and loved. “Out of twenty seven questions.”

“For fuck’s sake, what did I ever do to you guys?” asked Richie, putting down his hand again and preparing himself for the next round.

“You’re just an easy t-target,” Bill replied.

“Yeah, you’re fun to annoy,” Eddie added, eyes sparkling mischievously. Richie relented. It was hard to stay mad when Eddie was smiling at him like that.

“Don’t worry, Richie, I’ll go easy on you this time,” said Stan. He seemed genuine enough, but knowing how good Stan’s poker-face was, there was every possibility that he was lying through his teeth. “Okay, here’s a good one. Never have I ever had a crush on another member of the Loser’s Club.”

For a moment, no one moved. Richie’s own heart was beating against his ribcage and his palms began to sweat. There was no way Stan knew, was there? He’d been so careful.

Slowly, Ben raised a finger and then Bev, who was watching Ben with wide eyes. Bill followed after and then Mike, who was staring determinedly at the ground. When he turned and saw that Eddie was looking at him with his finger raised, Richie knew he couldn’t lie. He raised his finger too, though he would go to the grave swearing that he was madly in love with Bev if that’s who it turned out the rest of the Losers had a crush on.

“Holy shit,” said Stan. “That was not how I thought this was going to go.”

He glanced around at the rest of the room. Bev’s cheeks were filling with colour slightly and Ben looked as though he’d been hit over the head with a mallet. Bill was glancing over at Mike who still hadn’t looked up. When Richie turned back to Eddie and realised that he was still staring at Richie, wearing a similar expression to the one on Ben’s face, Richie’s stomach swooped.

Perhaps…

“So I guess we move on to Truth or Dare, then?” said Stan. “Ben you can start since you were the first person to put up your hand.”

Ben looked like he was going to throw up.

“I’ll go,” said Bev. “I pick dare.”

“Hmm, okay,” said Stan thoughtfully. “If you still have a crush on someone here, I dare you to kiss them. Otherwise, I dare you tell us who it was.”

Bev took a deep breath and then a step closer to Ben before pressing her lips to his in a sweet, gentle kiss. She pulled away beaming at Ben who in turn looked dumbstruck for a moment, before his face broke into the biggest grin any of them had ever seen. Richie was happy for them, there was no doubt about it, but there was also no denying that it complicated his plan to pin all his feelings on her if it turned out that Eddie liked someone else.

“Bev, who are you picking next?” asked Stan.

“Richie,” said Bev and his heart sank. She’d been playing mean the whole night and it wasn’t likely that she was going to stop now. “Truth or dare? I promise I’ll actually take it easy on you this time.”

There was no way he was telling the truth, but there was also no way he was going to be able to kiss Eddie if that’s what she dared. Or her for that matter. He was screwed. However, there was a softness to Bev’s eyes that suggested that maybe she was telling the truth about taking it easy. Taking a deep breath, he made his choice.

“Dare.”

“Aha. I dare you and Eddie to go play ding-dong-ditch at Eddie’s place.”

“Bev, are you shitting me?” hissed Eddie. “It’s past midnight. My mom would kill me.”

“Not if you’re fast,” said Bev with an evil grin. “Good luck.”

“I hate you so fucking much sometimes,” said Eddie, glaring daggers at her.

“Come on, Eds, it’ll be an adventure,” said Richie. He tried to sound braver than he was, but his heart was still racing. The fact that Eddie had been staring at him so intensely, like he was only interested in seeing whether or not he would put his finger up had to mean something, right?

Eddie’s house wasn’t far from Richie’s, only a couple of blocks, but with neither of them saying a word, the walk felt excruciatingly long. There were several times where he tried to start the conversation, but the words lodged uselessly in his throat. He was saved from the burden of having to say anything when he heard Eddie take a deep breath with his inhaler. When he turned around, Eddie was putting it away, eyes fixed on Richie.

“So, uh, you had a crush on someone in the Loser’s Club,” said Eddie, with a nervous quiver to his voice.

Well, fuck. They were in it now.

“I, uh, still do actually,” said Richie, fighting the urge to screw up his face in embarrassment. “How about you? You still suffering through your crush?”

“Kinda. Though, I guess the term ‘suffering’ depends a lot on how the other person feels.”

“Well Bev and Ben have made their feelings pretty clear, so I guess if it was one of them you’d already know whether you’re suffering or not.”

“It’s not Bev or Ben,” said Eddie.

“So it’s definitely a guy then?” Richie’s heart was already running away with itself, despite his best efforts to rein it in.

“Is that a problem?” Eddie replied, stopping in his tracks. Richie turned to look at him, and even in the ghostly white from the moon and streetlights overhead, Eddie looked paler than usual.

“Not at all,” he replied, reassuringly. “It would be kind of hypocritical of me anyway.”

“You mean your crush isn’t Bev? It’s a guy too?” Eddie’s voice was so filled with hope and oh how Richie suddenly longed and prayed for that hope to be about him. Surely that was too good to be true, though? There had to be some catch from the universe.

“I guess so,” said Richie, before setting off again for Eddie’s place, feeling overwhelmed that they were having this conversation at all. Eddie stayed rooted to the spot for a moment before following.

“I’m taking it that it’s also not Ben?” said Eddie, who’d had to jog a little to catch up with Richie’s long strides.

“Definitely not Ben.”

“Bill?”

“Nope.”

“Mike?”

“For fucks –“

Richie stopped again. They were almost at Eddie’s driveway. He lowered his voice, knowing how nosey Sonia Kaspbrak was when there was any kind of activity on the street outside.

“Look, we could eliminate all the possibilities one by one, or I could just grow a pair and tell you that I’ve been in love with you for almost as long as we’ve been friends and that if it turns out that you like another one of the Losers it’ll kill me, but I’ll try – “

“Oh my god, shut up,” said Eddie, clasping a hand over Richie’s mouth and dragging him to crouch behind a bush as a light at the house next door went on. Eddie looked at Richie apologetically. “Sorry, if Mrs Johnson sees us out here, she’ll definitely call my mom. She’s kind of a dick.”

“She would be with a name like that,” said Richie, though it was so muffled through Eddie’s hand he doubted he could understand it. He still didn’t know if Eddie felt the same way and the suspense was going to murder him long before Mrs Johnson or Scary Sonia would. He gently pulled Eddie’s hand away from his mouth and looked him in the eye.

“Eddie,” he whispered, taking a deep breath to get him through the rest of the sentence. “Please, for the sake of my sanity, is it me or someone else?”

Eddie reached up a slightly trembling hand and placed it on Richie’s cheek, swiping his thumb softly along his cheekbone. Though his hand was cold from the frosty October air, it was also the warmest thing Richie had ever felt in his life.

“Of course it’s you,” he said with a shy smile. “It always was.”

When the light next door went off a moment later, Eddie immediately sprang to his feet.

“Jesus, Spaghetti, warn a person,” said Richie, scrambling to his feet with his heart racing at the sudden change in atmosphere.

“Sorry,” he said, “but if we’re going to do Bev’s stupid dare, this is our chance.”

And before Richie could say anything in protest, Eddie was dragging Richie up the steps to their porch.

“As soon as I ring the bell twice, we’ll run and hide around the side of the house. She won’t think to look there.”

Richie had never been more in love.

“See, Eds, this is the kind of shit that makes me so crazy about you. Here we are in the middle of the biggest, most important conversation of our lives and you’re interrupting it for the sake of being a brave little bean doing shenanigans. Where else would I ever find anyone as perfect as that?”

Eddie didn’t respond, but Richie saw the pleased smile creep across his face. With hands still trembling, he reached up for the doorbell and pressed it once, then twice and without even waiting to hear if Sonia would come ambling to the door, the two of them ran. Eddie jumped the railing with a practiced ease and though Richie thought he would have no issues following suit, his foot caught the top of it and he tumbled to the ground. As the door began to swing open, Richie tried desperately to get to his feet and was rescued a moment later when a hand reached out and pulled him into the shadows next to the Kaspbrak house.

“Fuck me, that was close,” breathed Richie.

“Shh,” Eddie giggled. They were standing close together, probably closer than he’d ever stood in front of Eddie before and what little space there between them felt suddenly charged like it was full of electricity. It wasn’t even spoiled by Sonia’s furious threats to call the police on her invisible assailants.

“Eds, can I… I mean, can I kiss you?”

Eddie didn’t reply, but a second later Richie felt Eddie’s lips on his and the rest of the world disappeared.

It wasn’t his first kiss. He’d kissed Sally McCarthy after school one day a few years back because they were both bored and kind of curious about what it would be like. It had been awkward and weird, made only weirder when he had heard Eddie walking past the classroom he and Sally were in, calling out his name.

This was completely different. This was right. Eddie seemed nervous and hesitant at first, despite being the one who initiated the kiss, but once Richie reached up to splay his hands across Eddie’s soft neck and jaw, he seemed to gain confidence, pulling Richie closer and even slipping his hands up between Richie’s jacket and his shirt.

When they heard the front door slam, the two of them pulled apart.

“Just so you know, I carved our initials into the Kissing Bridge,” said Richie. “That’s how much of a heartsick cliché I am.”

“I did too,” laughed Eddie. “So I guess we’re both pretty sappy.”

“God, what do we tell the Losers?”

“I’m pretty sure Bev already knows. That’s why she sent us on a dare outside of the house – so we’d have a chance to talk without the rest there.”

“Holy shit, I knew it. She’s an actual hero,” said Richie. “Look, I mean, do you want the rest to know?”

“I guess I don’t mind them knowing, but the thought of telling them is…”

“Super embarrassing, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, let’s not tell them then. We’ll just do our thing and if they find out they find out. Saves us a conversation we don’t actually need to have.”

“Yeah, okay. I like that.”

Richie couldn’t resist giving Eddie another soft kiss.

“Well then, with that decided, shall we?” He held out a hand for Eddie to take.

“Hell yeah,” Eddie replied, threading his fingers through Richie’s. Richie forgave every romantic comedy he’d ever scoffed at as he walked down the street holding hands with the boy he’d been in love with forever. It really was as magical as they made it look.

When they arrived back at Richie’s house, it seemed that everyone was getting ready to settle down to watch another movie, although Bill’s sleeping bag was now a lot closer to Mike’s and Ben and Bev were cuddled up on the sofa. When Stan came through with an enormous bowl of popcorn to see that Eddie and Richie were holding hands, he rolled his eyes.

“Fucking Ben. I was just trying to catch out Ben,” he muttered to himself as he made his way back to the living room.

Eddie stood on his toes to press a kiss to Richie’s cheek.

“Never have I ever been so happy that a Stan Plan backfired,” he muttered against it.

The fingers that weren’t tangled with Eddie’s stayed firmly in Richie’s jacket pocket.

[elizaviento]

Protect & Serve

Okay.  @lolliequinn gave me the inspiration for this Cop Rick x Reader fic that’s been brewing in my head for the last few days.  This first chapter contains a good bit of the Reader’s back story and, yes, this will be another multi-chapter affair.  (Although, it won’t be nearly as long as Assimilation.  You’re welcome, lol.)  Anyway, without further delay-- 

Protect & Serve (part 1)

(Cop Rick x Reader)

SFW (for now, but not for long)

(FYI:  Additional chapters of Protect & Serve can be found in the Rick Fic Masterpost link in my blog description.  Or, you can click the #protect & serve tag in this post, within my blog, to access additional chapters.)

*****

I met my first Morty a year and a half ago.  I had been brought in to assist with an initial evaluation at the group home he was assigned to three weeks after his entire family had disappeared.  The exact circumstances that led to the disappearance were hazy at best and all anyone could seem to get from the poor boy is that his grandfather was the ultimate culprit.  Every other detail Morty begrudgingly divulged seemed ripped from a fever dream; talk of portals, interdimensional travel, alien worlds, alternate realities, infinite versions of not only himself but of nearly every person in existence.  Yeah, I had seen more than my share of cheesy science fiction films, but none were ever as descriptive or – dare I say – believable as what poured from Morty Smith’s mouth.

Eventually, he was diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic and was put on so many medications that he soon became just a shell of a boy.  I continued to see him on a regular schedule; no less than once a week.  When he wasn’t drugged up into a near catatonic state, he seemed happy to see me.  I would try my best to get to the truth of what happened to him and his family, but he would either constantly change the subject or tell the same story he’d asserted time and time again.  After several months of this, I changed my tactic and just tried to be a friend to him.  I would show up to our weekly appointments with games, candy and junk food and spend our allotted hour trying my best to go over his personal goals which consisted of relaxation techniques, educational milestones and socialization.  He was a sweet boy and I felt him growing on me as the months passed.  And, even though his trauma was severe, I could see the curious, fun loving side of him hiding just underneath.  

Then, one day, he was gone.   

I’d arrived to the group home at the same day and time as I usually did, expecting to see him either in his room or in the common area playing video games. But, when I checked in with the receptionist, she told me to take a seat and the director of the home would be by to fetch me shortly. 

“I’m sorry to be the one to inform you, but Morty Smith was claimed by a relative last week, right after your last visit,” the director said when we were securely behind the closed door of his office. 

“How is that possible?  It says in his chart that he has no other family.  He’s essentially an orphan.”  I opened his chart and began scanning through the information for what felt like the millionth time since he’d been assigned to me just shy of 6 months earlier. 

“A man showed up claiming to be his grandfather’s twin brother.  After searching through family records, we confirmed his story.”

“Okay,” I replied, pinching the bridge of my nose.  “But that still doesn’t explain how this man was able to just take Morty and stroll away with him. Morty was court ordered to this home.  There would have to be another court hearing to determine if that man was even fit to care for Morty, given his serious diagnosis!”  I was beginning to raise my voice in ire as I continued to explain my position.  There was no way any of this could be possible just from a legal standpoint alone, not to mention an ethical standpoint. 

The director just blinked at me and gave the same speech he’d given seconds earlier. It was like he was in some type of trance and any countering argument or insistence of further information was swiftly knocked down. 

“Fine.” I conceded, standing from my chair to prepare to leave.  “Then I have no choice but to report this to the state’s child protective services.  I have a duty to Morty as his case worker to make sure he is cared for and safe and I have not been given the proper assurances or required documentation.  I’m also going to note in my report that you, personally, have neglected your professional duties as the director of this facility.”  And, with that, I left. 

When I made it to the sanctuary of my car, I couldn’t stop the tears that stung my eyes and leaked down my cheeks.  It was a blessing but also a curse that I had a personal conviction to care for children such as Morty. I didn’t know if I would ever find out what happened to him, but I swore to myself – and to him – that I would try my best.

However, when I finally got home that evening, I was shocked to find him sitting on my living room couch.   

“Morty!  What the hell?!” I screamed, startled.  I dropped my bags on the floor to quickly closed the distance between us, kneeling directly in front of him.  How did he get in here?  How did he even know where I lived?

The first thing that struck me is that he looked… different.  He had put on weight – no longer the bone thin boy who hardly ate during meal times – and was dressed in a suit and tie.  His hair was slicked back and he no longer sported dark circles under his eyes.  He looked like a normal teenage boy dressed up for a junior high school dance. 

He didn’t speak. At least, not at first.  He only placed a hand on my shoulder with a calm smile and turned his head in the direction of my dining room where a man sat in one of the chairs.  He was dressed in some type of guard uniform and looked eerily familiar.

“What’s going on here, Morty?  I was at the group home today and they said you were released to your grandfather’s twin brother.”  And, that’s when it hit me.  The man sitting in my dining room looked identical to the photos I’d seen in Morty’s file of his grandfather, Rick Sanchez. “Is that him?” I asked.  Then, leaning closer and lowering my voice - “Or is that Rick?”

Regardless of how discrete I had tried to be, the man had obviously heard me as he quickly rose from his seat and began to approach Morty and I. Instinctively, I shifted my crouched position so that my body was completely in front of Morty, attempting to shield him from any harm the man may try to inflict. 

“It’s okay,” I heard Morty say from behind me, placing his hand on my shoulder once again.  He sounded calm and lucid which immediately took me aback. “I’m not the Morty you think I am.  But, I’ve been watching you and I’m very impressed with the dedication you’ve shown to the Morty of this dimension.  We could really use someone with your type of character on the Citadel to help other wayward Mortys.”

At this point, I was completely speechless and felt my stomach drop to my toes.  Morty – my Morty – had spoken of the Citadel many times during his, what I assumed to be, psychotic ramblings.  Could it have all been true? No, it couldn’t be…

The man dressed in the guard uniform was now standing directly in front of me and was offering his leather gloved hand.  Seemingly running on autopilot, I took it and allowed him to pull me to my feet and slightly away from Morty.  Then, I heard the flush of a toilet and whipped my head toward my bathroom as it opened to reveal Morty – another Morty. This one was dressed in a white button down oxford shirt and black slacks and was carrying a briefcase.  Around his neck, there was an ID badge that read –

Morty Smith N-1519 – Personal Assistant to the President

“Mr. President –” the other Morty began, glancing at his watch, “– we need to get back soon. You have a speech in two hours and you must prepare.”

Morty – President Morty? – nodded and turned his attention back to me.  “The Morty from this dimension is fine, by the way.  We took him to the Citadel last week.  You’re more than welcome to see him, if you decide to join us.  So, what do you say?”

--------------------

A year later, I found myself standing outside of a run down, abandoned building in the middle of what the locals called ‘Morty Town’, waiting for my mandated and mandatory Citadel Police Department escort.  As I flipped through the files of each Morty suspected to be squatting in the building, my mind began to wonder back to that night, when my life was flipped upside down.  As I stood here now, I didn’t regret my decision to move to the Citadel.  It was actually very easy to leave my old life behind considering most of my family lived on the other side of the country and I didn’t have many friends to speak of since I was a self proclaimed workaholic.  Once I had agreed, President Morty gave me two weeks to settle things in my home dimension before sending his assistant and the guard back to fetch me.  He then gave me an additional two weeks to acclimate myself to Citadel life, which was decidedly more difficult. 

Mortys and Ricks. Ricks and Mortys.  Everywhere.   

I’d never met a Rick before that night in my apartment.  But, being thrown into an entire space station full of them was very unsettling.  Mostly because they were all exactly alike but incredibly different.  It was an oxymoron of there ever was one and I fumbled through the nuances of daily life among them.   

Getting used to the throngs of Mortys was just as difficult, which is something I should have expected.  Thousand and thousands of 14 year old boys stuck in the middle of space with almost no females – of course it was an adjustment, to say least.  Despite the constant giggling, red faces and awkward flirting, most of them were joys to work with – except for the ones that weren’t.  But, those were different stories in and of themselves and the main reason I was recruited and voluntarily gave up my life on earth to come here. 

I was suddenly pulled from my thoughts when I heard the crunch of tires on the gravel covered asphalt and turned my body to face the police cruiser as it approached and parked just behind my car.   

“Hello, Officer Sanchez,” I greeted with a smile as he stepped out of the cruiser and adjusted his utility belt.  He gave me a small smile in return as he strolled toward me with his hands in his pockets.   

“Just call me –”

“Just call you Rick,” I cut in, smiling wider.  We played this game almost every time he was required to meet me for what was mandated as a ‘risky’ assignment and somehow, it hadn’t gotten old.  At least, not for me.

“One cream, no sugar,” I said, plucking a cup of coffee from the drink holder on the roof of my car to hand to him.   

“Uh, thanks.  You didn’t have to –”

“I know,” I acknowledged, cutting him off again.  I seemed to do that an awful lot and it sent a frustrated blush to my cheeks every time.  “Just consider it a ‘thank you’, okay?  I know it’s your job to come assist me with these visits but I appreciate it nonetheless.”

He only nodded in response as he took the cup from my outstretched hand, his fingers lightly brushing mine in the process.  Immediately, my neck and cheeks flushed anew. 

Damn it. 

As much as I hated to admit it, I had been harboring a crush on Officer Sanchez for most of the year I’d been here.  The first time I found out that I was required to take a police escort on ‘risky’ visits, I had been offended.  I was a seasoned professional at that point and knew how to take care of myself in iffy situations.  I had even taken self defense classes and carried mace on me at all times.  I tried arguing this point with my boss - another Rick - and even went to President Morty myself, but it was hopeless.   

“You’re the best we’ve got.  Most of the Mortys trust you but you know first hand that some of them have been traumatized well beyond trusting anyone.  This is for your own safety.”  He then left me standing in the waiting room outside his office, frustrated and determined to make miserable any officer who was unlucky enough to be stuck with me.  What an absolute brat I had been. 

“What – what do we got?” Rick asked me, taking a sip of his coffee and leaning casually against the side of my car. 

“Um – looks like four Mortys are squatting in this building.  All of them are presumed to have been caught up in the unsanctioned Pocket Mortys ring and are most likely still chipped,” I replied, flipping through the files to try to familiarize myself with each Morty’s individual look.   

“Yep,” he agreed, placing the coffee back on the hood of my car to check his utility belt.  He pulled out a taser and handed it to me.  “Take this.”

“Rick, you know I can’t –”

“Just – just take it,” he interrupted, grabbing my hand and thrusting the weapon into my open palm.   

I relented with a sigh and shoved it in the back pocket of my jeans before pulling an elastic band from the opposite pocket.  I then proceeded to tie my hair up into a tight bun, remove my earrings and other jewelry, and pull the belt from the loops of my jeans.  I’d worked with troubled kids long enough to know that the first rule of thumb is to never give them something to grab on to.   

After throwing the jewelry and belt into my car, I took a huge gulp from my coffee and dumped the remainder on the asphalt.   

“Ready?” he asked, removing his sunglasses and tucking them into his pocket so I could finally see his breathtaking brown eyes.

“Yeah.  Let’s get this over with.”

To be continued...

P.S.  Thanks for reading!  I think this will be a fun journey.  :)

[rantingfangirl]

Nation Mode

Thank you so much for the ask! @blood-guts-sunflowers​ Sorry that it took so long :) 

Any words that are bolded involve another headcanon (if you want a post on it, just ask!)

What it is

Nation Mode essentially what nations switch off if they want to gain a more human-like appearance. I use that instead of coming up with an official name, though I’m pretty sure that they themselves would call it something else. I haven’t seen any canon evidence for it, and I don’t know of anyone else who has this headcanon (besides maybe my friends who I shared the concept with), so it’s basically something that popped up in my head one day. 

What Changes? 

APPEARANCES

Appearances are what change the most. While in nation mode (which is the default), nations have brighter, more unnatural eyes (think of the really photoshopped green eyes on Google Images), their skin gets lighter/darker (depends on who) and clearer, and their hair looks more movie-perfect than anyone else’s would. When they’re not in nation mode, they look more human, to say the least. Hair duller, eyes normal-looking, etc.

ACCENTS

When a nation is in nation mode, their accents are all over the place. It doesn’t matter where they are in the world, their accents will change randomly. So, for example, America could be in California and speaking with a really heavy southern accent, but then all of a sudden, it’ll change and Alfred will sound like he’s grown up in Boston his entire life. Nations know when this will occur, as they start to get a small but sharp pain, along with a voice crack when the change actually happens. 

When they’re out of it, it’s a bit more complicated. Since they look more human than they do when they are in nation mode, they just can’t be randomly switch around, that would ruin the whole point of not being in nation mode. So, what happens, is that when they go into NNM (which I’ll be using for non-nation mode), an accent is picked and they stay with it, at least until they go back to NM. This can cause some problems, which I’ll go over in the Problems section :)

So, to put it simply: 

Since a lot of people can’t read my handwriting:

NM: Some Euro Nation, Completely Random, Rays of NM, “Bow down, pleb”, *voice crack*, accent constantly changing

NNM: Same country, “Tis I who is now the pleb”, Looks human, Accent Changes Every Session, Bunch of Problems

When Do They Go Into It?

Nations are constantly in nation mode! Like I said in the “What is It?” section, nations leave NM when they need to go incognito. This could be for something as simple as not wanting to be recognized at a party and just enjoy it to its full potential, or something serious such as a spy mission where they can’t draw the attention that being in NM would bring. 

I’d imagine they’d switch in and out quite often, but there are a few instances where I headcanon certain nations to out of NM just to act like their citizens for awhile. I think that North Italy would go to some parties in NNM and America might switch out to get a coffee in peace. This, of course, is depending on my other headcanon that nations are public figures, but it could still work, even if you think the opposite.

How Do They Know About It?

They’re “born”, with it, kind of like breathing. It’s one of those things where you’ve been doing it all your life and you don’t remember a time when you didn’t do it.

Of course, when they’re younger, it helps when one of their parental figures, the Ancients, take the effort to explain it to them, but not all have that luxury. If nations don’t have a parental figure with them (if I make a post for this, this’ll link to my nation family tree, which is a mess), then they’ll have to figure it out on their own or learn it from a nation who does have one, which might cause some issues at the start. It’ll eventually smooth out, though.

PROBLEMS

Accents When in NNM

As I mentioned in the “What Changes?” section, accents in non-nation mode comes with some difficulties. Since the accent changes every session, if a human were to meet them two different times, then they’ll be in for a barely-pleasant surprise. Imagine meeting someone with a strong and distinct southern accent, only to see them again a couple weeks later sounding like they’ve lived in Cali their entire life. 

They can’t really fix this, so most travel around, some even going as far as to go to the other side of the country if they need to.

Accents When in NM

Also in the “What Changes?” section, I went over that the accent changes are random, marked by a sharp pain in the throat and then a voice crack. This can get in the way of speeches, singing (I headcanon that America and South Italy are super super good), and anything that needs a steady and loud voice.

There’s also a problem with the accents themselves. Nations don’t get to choose what accent they switch to, so they could switch from the standard accent to some remote one that barely anyone understands. I haven’t really explored the idea fully, but nations would also be able to switch to accents of the past, so America would get this really deep radio-type accent and England might change to the way he spoke before received pronunciation really took hold. 

How Long They Can Hold NNM

Everything we do requires energy, and switching in and out of NM is no exception! Now, switching out of nation mode is not like the shapeshifter shifting in Supernatural (I’m thinking of this), nor is it like the Sailor Moon sequence. Think of it kind of like flipping an internal light switch, kinda like this: 

Now, the process changing into NNM (again, nation mode is the default) is not what takes all the energy. It’s maintaining it. And this can get tiring very, very fast. 

How long a nation can hold it depends on how old they are and how often they’ve been out of NM. Really, really old countries such as China and India can be in NNM for a few months at a time (not that they would want to), while countries that are only a few decades old can only hold it for about a week. Micronations, if they can switch out at all, can only hold it for a day. 

Appearance in the Presence of Other Nations

While it’s true that Nations won’t be recognized when they’re in NNM around humans, if other nations are present, then it’s a completely different case. Besides the fact that they’re aware of Nation Mode unlike humans, there’s also the chance that they could be recognized. 

Take this episode here:

If you’re not familiar with it, or you forgot what this particular episode was about (World Series, 33), then it’s basically England going to spy in Italy, only to be caught and captured by Germany. It’s blamed on the fact that England neglected to adapt to his surroundings, and was described as “crude” a few frames before this one. 

But surely, there must be someone in Italy who walks crudely. The entire country can’t be filled with suave walkers. So how could Germany pick England out of the crowd, even if England (in my headcanon) was out of nation mode? This brings me to my next and final point:

What Doesn’t Change

If a nation has their accent down, knows that there are no other nations in the general vicinity, and is old enough to be able to go kicking for awhile in NNM, then their next biggest issue to tackle would be the stuff that they can’t easily control. This “stuff” is essentially their culture and everything that goes with it.

Everywhere you go, you take your culture with you. Even if a nation were to go to another country for the millionth time, there would still be something that they would have that could make them stand out as foreign. This could be pedestrian behavior (walking speed, which side of the sidewalk you walk on, etc), a minor social taboo that they haven’t picked up on, or their speech patterns and wording in general.

This will be damning for stealth missions, especially for the ones where you need to mingle with locals and blend in. You could argue that nations would be able to quickly adapt to their surroundings, since they’ve gone through change in their own cultures, but, for the most part, change moves slowly, unless it’s intentional. And if nations were able to adapt, then there would still be little things that they neglected to change or forgot about.

So, going back to the previous point, it’s completely possible that England could’ve been detected based on a cultural aspect of his that he forgot to “get rid of” during his time in Italy, and stood out much more than he expected. 

[mountainsarecallingbabe]

We accept the love we think we deserve...

I keep thinking about our relationship now thats its over. All of this started a week ago because of my growing fear that he would never initiate conversations and action to plan to come out to see me and also to plan for our future (the future part could be reserved for another post folks because that was a roller coaster of a conversation on its own account)

To keep you up to speed I finally ended it yesterday after a week and a half of back and forth (I tried breaking up with him twice because of his lack of understanding on how important it was to me that he plan for short term and long term goals for us to be together, while he never broke up with me per se but said ok when I mentioned breaking up and never fought once against ending things and it even turned into him not wanting to be with me or without me...yes wtf is right). Me breaking up with him was something thats been a long time coming and now I’m just furious. At him yes, but also at myself. For letting him treat me anything less than the catch I am. Its been too long now that I’ve felt ‘less than’. Not worthy of a great love. He has put his friends and family above me way too many times. Yesterday things were already over because for the MILLIONTH time he had said he didn’t see it working, that he had lost faith in our relationship, he was unhappy and couldn’t put in the effort I needed (this is literally just starting conversations on when we will see each other because we are long distance and when we will be together again). Which by the way he made me wait for his decision as to whether or not he wanted to be with me even though I bore my heart to him and told him how much I cared and wanted to see this work). NO one deserves that. So it was over and I had told him that I couldn’t talk to him anymore if it was over so that I could move on. Lo and behold, not even a day passes and he texted me asking me how I was holding up???? as though we were friends and I didn’t just tell him he couldn’t have it both ways by talking to me all the time but not being with me. I didn’t respond and he kept pestering me with his indecisiveness to end our relationship. He basically is immature as hell and doesn’t know what he wants. He has a childlish view of the effort that is required to go into a relationship. 

Case in point: Before I left to New Mexico I asked him when we would see each other and he said I don’t know, so I basically took initiative (for the hundredth time) and took days off of work and then told him to make sure that he had those dates off and then buy tickets to come see me for the holidays. I told myself he could do this one, that I didn’t need to remind him like I normally do and he would remember and step up. Sure enough a week before he’s suppose to come he asks me what the dates are AND THEN tells me they are to expensive asking me if he should still get them??? FUUUUUUCK that. Long story short I had to essentially threaten to break up with him to get his ass out here. Which he did and in retrospect that should have been when I ended things instead of waiting a whole other month to wait for the next time he would disappoint me and forget to ask when we’d see each other again. Which who the fuck forgets to ask when they’ll see their lover, best friend, partner, to make things happen? Like wouldn’t you WANT to be with them and be aching to see them?? No? Just me? ok. I essentially let it go because he ended up coming out here even though it was like a burn mark on my heart and unleashed a ton of doubts to how things would work out since this was literally only a month in and this shit storm had already happened. 

Flash forward to yesterday after his confusing texts (which included: “I don’t ever not want to see you again :( and I’m sorry but I don’t know how to fix the problem”, which occured after I told him we couldn’t talk anymore and that he had made his choice and it wasn’t me so if it was really over I needed to not talk to him so I could heal). I ended up calling him to figure things out once and for all (this has been going on for a week and a half now of back and forth breaking up) and he was very relaxed saying he didn’t know what he wanted and that he needed to go because his friends were there (something he has done many times before). I was like are you serious? You can’t set aside 10 minutes to talk to me? He was like I need to go. So I told him I needed an answer to move on because this was killing me and he said he didn’t know AGAIN. I even said I had bought plane tickets to go see him this week and that I was going home and wanted to see him Thursday or Friday, since he’d be close by and he said ‘I dont know’, its not like it will change anything.... I was flabbergasted. I had poured my heart out to him multiple times within the past couple of days with flat out rejection every single time. I continued to give him chances because I love him. During all of this he has told me that he loves me more than anything which has got to be some kind of joke. Needless to say, his words were unbelievably painful. I told him firmly that he needed to make a decision about us right then and there so I could move on because he promised me he would give me a decision days ago and this was unfair and unloving to string me along like this. His response? He said again he needed to go. I told him to make a decision or it was over and he was like alright if its going to be that way then its over. his words hit me like a punch to the gut. I said that’s it? We’re not going to talk ever again, you know that right? and he said Ok, alright! with a degree of exasperation and desperacy in his voice to join his friends. This is when I had had enough. I was furious. That’s it then, I’m done and this is over, I said and I hung up. Later that night he sent me a text saying “fuck...what happened”. 

So let’s reflect: I can’t believe I’ve been dating a child for the past 2 years. I can’t believe I’ve put in effort beyond belief these past two years for someone who could never seem to step up to the plate (although to him he’s tried?? not sure how exactly). I can’t believe that I allowed him into my heart and that he has taken it and abused it in the most unloving way these past couple of days. Its been unbelievably painful, degrading and downright disgusting to me. People don’t understand how to put work in a relationship and they run away when things get hard. Its silly to think any relationship can work without hard work, effort and planning for the future. He has sucked tremendously at these things and all along I convinced myself if I just showed him how to love me he would turn things around. Although now I realize no one should have to show someone how to love them and hold their hand to understand how to make things work and be emotionally intelligent. Ive lost myself along the way and led myself to believing that this is all love could be. That I was being childish, needy and ‘too much’. I haven’t been nice to myself. I’ve thought, this person loves me and i’d be an idiot to give him up because I probably will never find anything half this good again. I’ve cried more these past two years than I have the 3 years before I met him. I’m half writing this to vent and also to convince myself that this is not my fault. That I can’t solve this problem because its not mine to solve. That I will find greater love and I need to first give that to myself. That someone’s love not backed by action isn't true love at all, they are just words that are carried with the wind and are easily broken.

Someone who loves someone shows them through action and effort every day. It doesn’t have to be big, it can be small things like a text or a call (even this he was struggling with). I haven’t received romance naturally or been taken out on a date or been asked to do anything spontaneous in forever from him or anyone else. I can’t remember the last time someone has done these things for me. I guess I’ve felt like I don’t deserve those things. Like they don’t exist and I should just be happy with the love I have. I want a great love. One that comes naturally that I don’t have to push and has someone coming after me and I to them. Where we both put in the effort and show each other that we care. I’m ready for that and thats what i’ve wanted to be doing all along but couldn’t give my fullest love to this person because they would just abuse it and drain me dry of my reserves to make things work for the both of us. Bottom line is I wasn’t getting what I needed. 

Its REALLY true that we accept the love we think we deserve and thats what I’ve been doing these past two years. Settling for a love that is not meant for me. I am a dreamer, a go-getter, I inspire others, I’m hella fine and I can get whoever I want. I love having conversations about the universe, I have dreams to make impacts within a community, I am adventurous, kind, free spirited and can talk to anyone even strangers. I am a risk taker, artist and a deep lover. I am strong, sensitive, a feminist, politically involved and I’m tired of putting myself down and accepting anyone into my heart without wariness or protection. I deserve so much more. I want someone to chase after me for once and see how beautiful my mind is and not just my body. I want them to ask me questions about what I love and learn things for me and the thing is I want that to! Because a partner is primarily a friend that you can go through life and ponder the universe with. 

I need to apply my same risk taking confident mindset that I have for all other aspects of my life to love. Because I AM worth it and I’m so tired of being let down by stupid little boys who treat me like something disposable instead of the goddamn queen I am.

[bizmediaweb]

The History of Social Media: 29+ Key Moments

Here, we’ve compiled some of the most pivotal “moments” in social media’s history. From the very first social networking site (invented in the 1990s), to recent changes to networks with billions of users.

So sit back, relax, and join us while we look back at what once was the future.

The 29 most important moments in the history of social media

1. The first social media site is born (1997)

On one of the first true social media sites, SixDegrees.com, you could set up a profile page, create lists of connections, and send messages within networks.

The site amassed around one million users before it was bought out for $125 million …and shuttered in 2000, though it later made a modest comeback and still subsists today.

2. Are you? Hot or Not (2000)

Who can forget Hot or Not ( AmIHotorNot.com )—the site that invited users to submit photos of themselves so others could rate their attractiveness. The site is rumored to have influenced the creators of Facebook and YouTube—and nurtured millions of insecurities.

After being sold off a few times, its new owners tried to revive it as a “game” in 2014.

3. Friendster (2002)

Then along came everyone’s BFF: Friendster.

Launched in 2002, Friendster was originally going to be a dating site that would help set up people with friends in common. You could create a profile, include “status updates” and reveal your mood. Messaging “friends of friends of friends” was also a thing.

Unfortunately, the site’s spike in popularity in 2003 caught the company by surprise and took a toll on its servers, impacting users, who increasingly looked to connect elsewhere.

4. Myspace: “a place for friends” (2003)

In droves, frustrated Friendsters said “sorry it’s not me, it’s you” and pulled up stakes for Myspace , the Friendster rival that quickly became the go-to site for millions of hip teens. Its customizable public profiles (which often featured music, videos and badly shot, half-nude selfies) were visible to anyone, and were a welcome contrast to Friendster’s private profiles which were available only to registered users.

2005 marked the apex of Myspace. The site had 25 million users and was the fifth popular site in the United States when it sold to NewsCorp that year. And that was the start of its decline from ultra-trendy to ultra-tacky.

5. Gaining traction (2003-2005)

In 2003, Mark Zuckerberg launched Facemash, described as Harvard University’s answer to Hot or Not. “The Facebook” followed in 2004. Registering its one millionth user that same year, the site dropped the “the” to became just “Facebook” in 2005, after the “Facebook.com” domain was purchased for $200,000.

Around the same time, a tidal wave of other social media sites swept ashore:

LinkedIn emerged, targeting the business community. Photosharing sites like Photobucket and Flickr, social bookmarking site del.ici.ous and the now ubiquitous blogging platform, WordPress also came into existence.

YouTube also launched in 2005. Anyone remember “Me at the zoo”—the very first YouTube video of that man and the weirdly watchable elephants? It now has 56 million views.

News-aggregator-cum-snark factory, Reddit arrived that year too.

6. Twitter hatches (2006)

Despite its 2004 birth date, 2006 was arguably the year Facebook truly took flight: it opened registration to everyone and went from an exclusive Harvard-only club to a global network.

Twttr, the site that eventually became known as Twitter also took flight in 2006.

The first tweet ever, posted by co-founder @Jack Dorsey on March 21, 2006, read: “just setting up my twttr.” So glad they changed the name, because “twttr” scks!

Dorsey originally envisioned twttr as a text message-based tool for sending updates between friends. Apparently in the early stages of its development the twttr team racked up some steep SMS bills. TechCrunch reported twttr’s first users were sending breaking life updates like: “Cleaning my apartment” and “Hungry”. (My, how times have(n’t) changed!)

7. LinkedIn “in the Black” (2006)

In sharp contrast to other networks, LinkedIn—once known as “Myspace for adults”—was the first to offer users paid premium packages. Its Jobs and Subscriptions area, the site’s first premium business line, helped bring in revenue in the early days.

In 2006, just three years post-launch (and three years before Facebook!), LinkedIn turned a profit for the first time.

“As far as we’re concerned, a year of profitability is but a ‘taste’ of the success we aspire to achieve at LinkedIn,” said social media manager Mario Sundar, in a blog post lauding LinkedIn’s first year “in the black.”

The site’s profitability would be a recurring theme in the stampede towards IPO—both LinkedIn, and numerous copycats.

8. YouTube makes partners (2007)

Through YouTube’s elephantine beginnings, buzz grew: it gathered nearly eight million daily views between its May 2005 beta its official launch in December 2005. Then, things escalated quickly: ahead of its acquisition by Google in the fall of 2006, the site grew to 100 million videos being watched by 20 million dedicated users.

In May 2007, YouTube introduced its partnership program, which has been key for the site. The initiative is what it sounds like: a partnership between YouTube and its popular content creators. YouTube provides the platform and creators provide the content. Profits from advertising on creators’ channels are then shared between the two parties. And that’s how Lonelygirl15 and your favorite YouTubers got their start.

9. Tumblr and the age of the microblog (2007)

In 2007 the social network described as “Twitter meets YouTube and WordPress” came a-tumblin’ along. 17-year-old David Karp launched Tumblr from his bedroom in his mother’s New York apartment. The site allowed users to curate pictures, videos and text and “reblog” their friends on their “tumblelogs.”

Soon after, the term micro-blogging became widely used to describe both Twitter and Tumblr, which both allowed users to “exchange small elements of content such as short sentences, individual images, or video links.”

10. The hashtag arrives (2007)

The strict 140-character limit for tweets set Twitter apart from rivals, including Facebook and Tumblr. But Twitter’s significance in the digital age was really defined by the hashtag, a symbol that has helped political organizers and average citizens mobilize, promote, and create awareness for critical (and not so critical) social issues.

Hashtags have also helped plant the seeds that sprouted movements such as #Occupy, #BlackLivesMatter, and #MeToo.

Also, timesucks like #SundayFunday, #YOLO and #Susanalbumparty.

As the story goes, during the summer of 2007, one of Twitter’s early adopters, Chris Messina, proposed the hashtag (inspired from his early days on internet relay chats) for organizing tweets. It wasn’t until a couple of months later, that the #SanDiegoFire hashtag was sparked to aggregate tweets and updates about the California wildfires.

Still, Twitter didn’t fully embrace the hashtag until 2009, realizing that it was more than just a useful way to group content, but a unique vernacular for expressing ideas and emotions online too. It invigorated the platform, and brought new users.

11. Welcome Weibo (2009)

While we’re on the topic of micro-blogging, we would be remiss not to mention China’s Sina Weibo, or simply Weibo. A Facebook and Twitter hybrid, the site launched in 2009—the same year Facebook and Twitter were banned in the country. Along with Qzone and QQ, Weibo remains one of the most popular social networks in China, with 340 million active monthly users.

12. Back to the land with FarmVille (2009)

Back over on the other side of the ocean, 2009 was the year your mom, granddad and Aunt Jenny joined Facebook and couldn’t (or wouldn’t) stop inviting you to join the new family pastime, FarmVille. Like you didn’t have enough chores to do IRL, wiling the day away on virtual animal husbandry added to the list.

The addictive social game eventually made TIME magazine’s list of the world’s worst inventions. (Of course, that didn’t stop Zynga from creating spinoffs like PetVille, FishVille and FarmVille 2 among others. PassVille.)

13. When your FourSquare “check in” ousted your FarmVille update (2009)

2009 also showed users how to acquire important-sounding-yet-meaningless titles from their daily travels. Location-based app Foursquare was one of the first that allowed users to “check in,” while sharing recommendations all about their favourite neighbourhoods and cities with friends and family …and earn virtual mayorships while they were at it.

14. Grindr revolutionizes the hookup (2009)

Tinder comes to mind as the app that changed online dating culture when it appeared in 2012. But Grindr, on the scene in 2009, was the first geosocial networking app for dating geared towards gay and bisexual men, helping them meet other men nearby. For better or worse, it revolutionized hookup culture for gay men, and paved the way for many others like Scruff, Jack’d, Hornet, Chappy, and Growlr (for bears).

15. Unicode adopts the emoji (2010)

There can be little doubt that digital culture changed in 1999 when the emoji first appeared on Japanese mobile photos, thanks to Shigetaka Kurita. Their popularity quickly ???? (uh, took off).

By the mid-2000s, emoji started appearing internationally on Apple and Google platforms.

Realizing writing online without access to a thumbs up emoji was nearly impossible, Unicode adopted the emoji in 2010. The move was the beginning of emojis being legitimized as a language. So essential was the “Face with Tears” (a.k.a. the laugh-cry emoji) that it was actually adopted as a word by the Oxford Dictionary in 2015.

And each country has their own favorite: for Americans it’s skulls, Canadians love the smiling pile of poo (WTF, Canada?), and for the French? Of course it’s the heart.

16. Introducing Instagram (2010)

Can you remember the pre-filter days of photo-sharing—back when there wasn’t the option to add the Gingham filter to make everything look “vintage”?

We have Instagram’s founders to thank for our inability to go a day without posting a filtered pic with polaroid corners to our highly curated feeds. On July 16, 2010, one of the first Instagram photos to be published by co-founder Mike Krieger (@mikeyk) was an uncaptioned, heavily filtered shot of a marina.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Mike Krieger (@mikeyk) on Jul 16, 2010 at 10:26am PDT

The shot definitely set the tone for the billion users around the globe the today post upwards of 95 million shots a day (according to 2016 figures).

17. Pinterest has us pining to pin (2010)

Though it first went live in closed beta in 2010, it wasn’t until 2011 that “pinning” would become a favourite new hobby (and verb) for domestic gods and goddesses. Social bookmarking site Pinterest was once called “digital crack for women” and gave women’s lifestyle magazines and blogs a new raison d’etre.

A 2012 report about the site found that home, arts and crafts, and fashion were the most popular categories on Pinterest. That’s still true in 2018.

Recent stats show two million people post pins every day, and there are one billion pins living on the site!

18. #Jan25 Tahrir Square uprising (2011)

Jan. 25, 2011 was a fateful day for hundreds of thousands of Egyptians who took to the streets, gathering in Cairo’s Tahrir Square to protest 30 years of dictatorship under Hosni Mubarak. The uprising eventually forced Mubarak to step down—just as similar protests had ousted Tunisian dictator Zine El Abidine Ben Ali days earlier.

Similar actions, which came collectively to be known as the “Arab Spring,” swept countries across the Middle East and North Africa, and were credited with bringing down governments and bringing about positive change for local populations. Reports found that social media networks were critical tools for organizers in mobilizing, publicizing and shaping opinion.

Popular hashtags on Twitter (#Egypt, #Jan25, #Libya, #Bahrain and #protest) were tweeted millions of times during the first three months of 2011. Facebook usage grew across the region, doubling in some countries.

Government attempts to block access to Facebook and Twitter were briefly successful, but quickly spurred activists to find other creative ways to organize, inspiring onlookers the world over.

19. Snapchat’s disappearing act (2011)

Launching almost exactly a year after Instagram, soon-to-be rival “Picaboo” launched …and then quickly rebranded to Snapchat following a lawsuit by a photobook company with the same name. (Probably for the best.)

The app’s early success tapped into the ephemeral nature of life’s moments, allowing users to post content that would vanish after 24 hours. (Not to mention giving us all the ability to puke rainbows.)

The disappearing snaps appealed to the teen demographic the app first attracted. Snapchat was also the perfect alternative for teens to find their friends—and flee family on Facebook.

20. Google Plus wants in on the party (2011)

2011 was also the year Google attempted to roll out another answer to Facebook and Twitter—following previous failed attempts like Google Buzz and Orkut. Google+ or Google Plus began with an invitation-only system in 2011. That summer, new users got access to 150 invitations they could send out before the site’s official opening in September. Demand was so high that Google eventually had to suspend them.

Google Plus differentiated itself from Facebook with its “circles” for organizing friends and acquaintances that could be done easily without having to send a friend request.

By the end of 2011, Google Plus was fully integrated into related services like Gmail and Google Hangout. Unfortunately, timing of the social network’s launch following Facebook and Twitter meant that the social network struggled to accrue the staggering usage numbers its competitors had. (Clearly there are some parties you just don’t want to be late to.)

21. Facebook celebrates one billion (2012)

Just eight years after launching in Mark Zuckerberg’s Harvard dorm room, Facebook announced its user base had reached a significant milestone—and now shared a population nearly the size of India.

“If you’re reading this: thank you for giving me and my little team the honor of serving you. Helping a billion people connect is amazing, humbling and by far the thing I am most proud of in my life,” Zuckerberg said.

Looking back, now that Facebook has two billion users and three other billion-user platforms—WhatsApp, Messenger, and Instagram—his quote sounds all the more quaint.

22. Year of the selfie (2014)

Twitter proclaimed 2014 as the “Year of the Selfie” following Ellen DeGeneres’s Oscar photo. You know the one. Or, you should. Because that selfie has been retweeted more than three million times—setting a Twitter record and winning Twitter’s award for “Golden tweet” of the year.

If only Bradley's arm was longer. Best photo ever. #oscars pic.twitter.com/C9U5NOtGap

— Ellen DeGeneres (@TheEllenShow) March 3, 2014

The debate about who invented the selfie has yet to be resolved. Paris Hilton said she did in 2006. Others say it was actually a guy named Robert Cornelius in 1839. (He wasn’t available for comment.)

23. Meerkat, Periscope: the streaming wars begin (2015)

Meerkat was the first app to start the live streaming craze (RIP). Then, Twitter developed Periscope and won the first streaming wars (there’s another one coming, I’m sure).

Periscope became everyone’s favorite, easy-to-use app for streaming and watching live events. Getting showered with “hearts” anytime you hit the record button was pretty much all the incentive anyone needed to try it out. It was so popular that Apple awarded the app the iOS app of the year in 2015.

Three years on, the video app is rumoured to be struggling. But it’s also integrated with the Twitter mobile app, so there are still ways to become a Periscope celeb.

24. Facebook LIVE (2016)

Facebook was slow to slide into the live stream game, first rolling out live streaming features on its platform in 2016. But the company has worked to ensure its success in the space with extra resources and partnerships with mainstream media like Buzzfeed, the Guardian and the New York Times.

Special attention from Zuckerberg and its massive user base have also ensured its dominance.

25. Instagram launches Stories (2016)

Taking a page from Snapchat’s playbook, Instagram introduced “Stories” allowing users to post photo and video sequences that disappear within 24 hours (although they can now be saved and archived). Filters, stickers, polls, hashtags, and highlights to enhance Stories have succeeded in making the app even more addictive, as if that was even possible.

26. The U.S. election and social media’s fake news crisis (2016)

You could argue that 2016 was a no good very bad year for social media—and by extension democracy.

It was the year a sophisticated information warfare was waged using “troll factories” on social media used to spread disinformation—including false claims and conspiracy theories—during the U.S. presidential election. Mainstream influencers like journalists, pundits and politicians—even Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump—were found to be spreading content that bots had shared online.

Facebook has since revealed that 126 million Americans were exposed to content by Russian agents during the election.

In 2018, Facebook, Twitter, and Google representatives appeared before the U.S. Congress to testify as part of ongoing investigations into Russia’s attempts to influence the elections.

27. Twitter doubles the character limit (2017)

In an effort to attract more users, Twitter doubled its signature character limit from 140 to 280 characters. The move was widely panned by more than a few users (and had critics hoping Trump wouldn’t find out).

Of course, it was @Jack who tweeted out the first super-sized tweet:

This is a small change, but a big move for us. 140 was an arbitrary choice based on the 160 character SMS limit. Proud of how thoughtful the team has been in solving a real problem people have when trying to tweet. And at the same time maintaining our brevity, speed, and essence! https://t.co/TuHj51MsTu

— jack (@jack) September 26, 2017

The major change along with the introduction of “threads” (aka Twitterstorms) now means tweets that will make you go WTF are increasingly unavoidable as everyone makes the most of their 280 characters.

28. Cambridge Analytica and #DeleteFacebook (2018)

In early 2018, it was revealed that Facebook allowed a researcher from Cambridge Analytica—who had worked on Donald Trump’s presidential campaign—to harvest data from 50 million users without their consent. A campaign to #DeleteFacebook swept the internet as users protested by deleting their profiles on the site en masse. Despite this, Facebook’s user numbers continue to climb.

Facing mounting pressure to address data privacy, Zuckerberg participated in five days of hearings before the U.S. Congress.

29. Instagram launches IGTV app (2018)

If you thought Boomerang was the only video app Instagram had up its sleeve you would be wrong. Instagram is now ready to compete with YouTube: the company increased its one-minute video limit to one-hour and launched a whole new app, IGTV, dedicated to long-form video.

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