#sorry folks ive done it again

[needle-noggins]

Ah yes, the Fifth Moon Prequel, aka Lost July, in Vol. 5. I cried for a solid ten minutes reading this scene and I'm probably going to cry again while writing this post, but who cares, I have a duty to perform as the unofficial book club analyst of Vash's assault trauma. Also, ouch for Knives to say how much he hates Rem before assaulting Vash. Insult to injury. ANYWAY:

First off, I really like how I could understand this scene just based on my understanding of Knives' power/the twins' link in Stampede - Knives is able to pull Vash into this weird mindscape, or Vash is just remembering, but either way - it's cool how you can tell what's in the past based on the plain black background. And Knives' stupid little beverage... I hope he chokes on it.

Uh, hey guys? Hey, boys? What are your seeds that contain this power, why are you asking Vash to resonate with you, why does it feel hot, and why does it end in an amazing feeling of release?

Where's the rape/non-con tag when you need it?

This needs no explanation.

Sorry I thought the baby angel arm was cute.

The thing about July that is so different from Fifth Moon, though, is that while Vash was experimented on first (oh yeah, more loss of body autonomy: forced medical procedures/experimentation!) and his angel arm was triggered by Knives, he had more control over the endgame situation this time - barely. Knives makes the mistake of taking Vash's face and pushing him to the ground face-up, and Vash uses that opportunity to point the angel arm at Knives. He's so angry and afraid that he shoots. Not going to go into detail as there's another amazing post floating around about Vash shooting Knives but oof, does that backfire on our poor boy. Meanwhile, in Juenora Rock, Knives purposefully goes behind Vash to get better control and stay out of the firing range. Both instances involve some unwanted changes to Vash's body and loss of control, both instances involve the two in, uh, compromising positions.

Knives is more than capable of destroying towns himself, but that wouldn't be as fun for him, I guess, as desperately trying to show his brother that he's a monster who should be hated by humans. His logic is so Fucked Up and that's that on overwhelming fear and perpetuating cycles of trauma.

[elegyofthemoon]

out of curiosity!

[lux1fer]

oopsies i forgot to show you guys the finished product of this yeah a few weeks ago the rp actually finished completely. im really happy with how this animatic came out and id definitely be willing to finish it. itd definitely take me a year at the least though this rp means the world to me. im gonna be emotional for a second sorry folks but like i havent had this much fun in a roleplay since my old warrior cat rp days- even then they were never as good as this one was. none gave me this much whimsy a thank you to @interncontinental for hosting this amazing rp. you're awesome /gen anyways, timestamps below ! this is gonna be. another wall of text.Again. so cw for text wall if ur prone to seizures caused by text. ive tried spacing the text out to help but it's probably still pretty bad, so forewarning !

0:00 ink and error (alongside many others) are trapped in this safehouse(the multiverse outside it is collapsing) which. as the name depicts. keeps them safe the safehouse has a dome surrounding it that's miles thick with concrete, metal, all that 0:13 error REALLY does not like being trapped here, so he tried breaking through the walls with his blasters 0:26 ink attempts to convince him not to (as it is against the rules to break the walls) but error doesn't listen. they have a big fight and error ends up breaking the dome's outer layer- which is what essentially lights up the entire place, and gives the illusion they're on earth. 0:51 he, alongside ink, are sent to a dungeon as punishment. (they end up making a friend there) and they use the owner of the dome's aunt to bribe him into letting everyone out. 1:17 error and the owner end up having a private discussion, in which error realizes the owner- the guy he DESPISED, was exactly like him. they both killed multiverses. they both killed people for fun. 1:22 he ends up having a fight with his own morals, before deciding he'd change for the better. 1:29 error frees the owner's aunt in exchange for the freedom of the people locked in the dungeon with him. 1:42 while he's walking out of the dungeon, he apologizes to ink for everything he's done 1:45 error walks back to his room and cries. 1:48 ink ends up pushing a chocolate bar with a note on it through the crook at the bottom of error's door the note says he forgives him. error cries again because of it. 1:51 ink and error end up hugging

1:52 eventually, ink realizes that he's run out of his lil emotion vials due to the corruption of the multiverse, which is an issue ! 1:59 due to ink's rapidly decaying health, error decides to give up half of his soul to save the guy from going kaput! this causes even more issues 2:04 nightmare- who had come to the safehouse, decides to mess with error's mind. he convinces him to get back into his old habits, under the pretense that he's weak and pathetic otherwise. error believes this. (also nightmare was redesigned by a friend of mine- her name is al! she doesnt have tumblr i dont believe though so raghh i cant ping her) 2:17 in what can only be described as a mental breakdown, error attempts to take back the half of his soul he gave to ink 2:30 error hesitates- he doesn't truly want to hurt ink, though he's not too sure why. 2:36 (its not on screen cus i couldn't fit it) error decides to capture and attempt to kill pj and gradient (who are here too!) instead, but this backfires as ink was no longer captured. ink knocks him out with his brush. 2:42 the corruption, which had been kept safely outside of the safehouse, has crept in due to corrupted individuals entering the dome. this forces everyone to escape through a previously blocked up exit the owner had built. 2:44 huge timeskip- essentially, the place they had found to live in after fleeing caught on fire, forcing everyone to run away Again! 2:46 in the new new place they had escaped to, the corruption Also arrived! the location was a cloud castle that floated above an ocean. which was quickly corrupting. the castle collapses, and floods with corrupted water. this scene needs a LOT of context-- the bandaged character by the name of blaze (owned by @teyvawni by the way go check out his stuff) arrived to the safehouse a while ago, with his brother following suit. said brother was corrupted. fresh, paperjam, and gradient were nearby when they arrived, and upon seeing the corrupted individual, fresh decided to commit Murder! this obviously upsets blaze, and he ends up killing both fresh AND pj and gradient- pj and gradient's death being present here. ink is watching 2:47 hinto, who is one of, if not the only friend error made in this roleplay ends up getting brutally murdered. this scene depicts him dying in error's embrace (you will see these two a lot whenever i draw this rp. i love them so much) 2:49 after the cloud castle collapses, they escape to what is essentially just error's void except everything is fluffy everyone present was given a choice- the universe was resetting, as the corruption had completely taken over Everything. including universes seperate from utau. you either stay awake for the 3 trillion years it took to completely reset the entire universe, or you sleep. considering error's friend was now a ghost and he didnt want to waste this time sleeping without spending time with his best friend, he chooses to stay awake for the entire 3 trillion years. 2:51 after those 3 trillion years, error is reasonably Exhausted. everyone else is exploring this new place they arrived in, while he is simply sitting in the corner and observing. he can only really stand speaking with hinto as he watches everyone else bicker and do whatever. 2:52 after error Brutally murders the person who killed hinto (this is not included in the animatic), error, ink, and dream are speaking to eachother in a nearby bamboo forest. nightmare interrupts and attacks ink with dust tagging along. big fight occurs, error and ink are mortally wounded, and are probably hashtag Screwed! 2:56 in a last ditch effort to save the people he cares about, error decides to sacrifice the half of his soul still left to save ink from dying.

soo Yeah! thats it! if this gets like. 20 notes im gunna make a comic based off of this. this isnt to incentivize people to like or reblog (Though that would be pretty swag of you ,, flutters my eyelashes) i just want an excuse :3 ill probably do it either way. eventually

[angel---eater]

im so curious what u mean by the vriskafication of jegbert? /genq

ive been watching the hs fandom from afar since the epilogues were dropped.

this is a rlly good question- i have a lot of thoughts and feelings abt june and how the fandom has taken to her her and is now portraying her in popular fanon. im so sorry this has gotten so long. im also sorry if i say smth you or anyone reading this disagrees with, but in my experience this is kind of inevitable when it comes to the topic of june egbert, trans characters who havent come out in canon yet, and trans headcanons as a whole. this shits personal to all of us and we all have different perspectives on transness, and oftentimes how we view transness in fiction is very much coloured by our own gendered experience.

it boils down to: can we please fucking let trans girls live. we are so fuckin weird about transfem folks and trans girls/women, even in fiction. sometimes especially in fiction, actually. especially on this gd website. if i have to see one more person defending june (and tgirl roxy) as a concept, and through that, defending real life transfems existences by talking about girldick or being a sweet docile sugary femme babygirlie kittycat, i will turn everyone into a fucking goldfish and flush you all one by one down my toilet. this, again, also extends to how a lot of the fandom handles trans headcanons in general, regardless of gender. all of what im about to say is from watching the homestuck fandom and fanon grow and change over 10+ years, basically since the beginning on this site specifically

some disclaimers for my trans resume i guess: i am intersex. i am plural. we as a system identify systemwide as transfemasuline or transneutral in an attempt to both honor and not speak over each other in terms of gender expression and individuality, while also trying to condense our existence for singlets to understand better, faster. we dont have time to explain all our shit all the time lol. we have transfems and transmascs in our system and everyone getting a fair, even chance at their preferred presentation is how we roll. we have lived a transfemasculine life. you cant put us in a single blue or pink corner, it wont work we are immune to that bullshit.

the vriskafication of june egbert is basically me trying to short-hand describe the way that ive seen some fans portray june post-transition by turning her into a mean girl[tm] type of person. there's also the roxyfication of june egbert, where other people make her a ditzy bimbo who can do no wrong because 'shes a girl now' and thats apparently how ppl still think girls should behave?? jegbert's canon personality traits need not apply anymore, apparently, bc that was icky boy behaviour. ghostbusters who? she likes shopping now. fanon june is sometimes eerily similar or exactly like vriska (fanon, woobified vriska, mind you, bc we still cant get a grasp on vriska as a fandom either) while also dressing very high femme and only high femme. because she has to perform someone elses femininity (spoiler: our own concept of what girls 'should look like' to be considered girls) instead of her dads masculinity now. shes either mean like vriska, or dumbed down like fanon roxy, who again has been watered down into a ditzy dumb girly girl who has done nothing wrong ever, bc shes 'just a girl', and bc people get Uncomfy when fictional tgirls do bad things. and oh boy has canon roxy done some bad things

as a counterpoint to my aesthetic based grievances, which are entirely personal- you can portray june egbert however you want. i personally invision her as very butch, but i could be totally wrong! im not even trying to make guesses here! this is my personal make-believe! she is not a real person and has never actually appeared as herself in canon. we dont know what junathan would/will be like during and post-transition. we dont know what an egg crack event will do to them. but some of the ways ive seen june portrayed feels........ off, personality wise. very off. and thats what i care about. it feels like malgendering in way too many cases, with the ditzy girliepop/catty girlbully thing. its straying too close to the tgirl brand of madonna/whore that tfems have to face in real life constantly. this is especially bad for tgirl roxy but i'll get to how fanon vs canon roxy is handled later

i use the word 'vriskafication' bc like vriska, june egbert (meaning tgirl jegbert, previously known as john in fandom and currently as john in canon, just to hammer it home that june and john are the same person, because some fans do seem to forget that john is living life believing shes a boy and a man right now and i dont think that should be erased) is still a pretty polarizing concept. fans either love her and disregard jegbert as ever having been john, or they disregard her as a concept in favour of how john is right now in canon. or theyre just straight up transmisogynistic about it bc they want their yaoi or their het ships. and BOY are some of the fandom not shy about that. which actually leads me into my next disclaimer:

im not including tboy/tmasc john headcanons in the above statement. i do not care about fighting over trans headcanons. i think that shit is just disrespectful and pointless and juvenial. you are fighting for nothing. june/john will not thank you for fighting for their trans rights bc they are not real and have no rights. june is not canon (yet) because she has not had that realization yet, and we dont know if/when she will. and genderbend aus have been a thing since the dawn of fandom anyway. more than one type of headcanon can exist at the same time. we are playing pretend. headcanons will never be proper representation. we are fans, not corporate entities or big directors or production teams churning out content for mass audiences. john has been considered a cis boy for FAR longer than june has been a popular concept, and you dont know how long someone has had or how close to someones heart their trans headcanon is, regardless of what flavour of trans headcanon it is. its rude. some of yall are so fucking mean for no reason other than 'you cant sit with us. on wednesdays we wear pink' rules. very intentional reference there

and i mean okay, roxy. big pink elephant in the room. no one respects or even acknowledges the fact that roxy in the Meat timeline is transmasc and currently only uses he/him, and when they do they're bullied fuckin relentlessly and ostracised from fandom spaces. ive seen entire hate campagns specifically for badmouthing transmasc roxy fans to try to get them to stop posting tmasc roxy stuff, or to see it as transmisogynistic violence akin to shooting a real trans girl live on tv. i have seen these comparisons be made on this site. ive seen others get actually violently transphobic about it back in 2019-2022, and even now. ive talked to fans who were mass dogpiled and harrassed off tumblr for liking meat!roxy's direction, or even just not publicly condemning him while having a neutral stance. i myself have been instablocked from servers and off of ppls blogs for thinking tmasc roxy is cool and a good plot point for his overall personal arc, especially in juxtaposition with roxy's pregnancy in candy, and how that affected her rship with her body and her gender. ive been called horrible things for even considering roxy to be anything but DMAB. that chapter in candy where we get a glimpse inside roxy's head about gender was beautifuly written with a lot of tact for trans people who can be or have been pregnant and enjoyed it, something that is INSANELY RARE. UNHEARD OF, EVEN, IN MEDIA. so this really isnt about trans rights or representation from my perspective. its just gendered bullying and a whole lotta white knighting from people who are majoratively not even fucking transfem.

the same notes of trans coding for roxy that fans deem only as transfem could be seen as coding for transmasculinity too. yes, including the XY thing. does anyone remember what foreshadowing is. and all of this even depends, hinges, on whether hussie intentionally wrote ANY of the human kids as trans initially or had it planned from the very beginning, which i really really really dont think she did!!! in 2009??? yeah fucking right!!!! the entire thing about roxy and jane pressuring dirk and jake into relationships is about cis girls feeling posessive of and entitled to queer boy's bodies and attention, because its something they cant have, and cis girls are seen as a group of people physically incapable of harm, which is misogyny that directly effects cis girls/womens victims. its a direct mirroring to cis boys doing the same to queer girls. and as much as i love all flavour of trans reads for the alpha kids in fandom, i dont think i wouldve appreciated it in canon. i wouldve hated it, actually. it waters down the message and makes everything far too messy and open to bad faith interpretation. we need more trans characters doing bad things in media, but the era the alpha kids section of HS1 was being published was NOT the time. an inarguably canon tgirl character preying on an inarguably queer tboy in 2011-2012? there would have been blood in the streets. i VASTLY prefer fanon interpretations when it comes to the alpha kids being trans. i trust fans way more, but i obviously still have reservations about that which is why im here writing all this

to further back this up- hussie has also openly discussed having her eyes opened to queer issues BY queer fans WHILE HS1 was still being updated!!! THATS why you can see a gradual influx of genuine queerness in homestuck as you read it!!! the vagueness of the trans coding we percieve in the text is why tboy john is still so popular!!! WAY more trans experiences, especially in childhood, are more similar than The Current Discourse bad actors will try to have you believe. please dont believe them, they're not right in the head and the ppl trying to convince you that someone has it The Absolute Worst are lying to you. we all have it bad, thats how oppressive systems work. its just in different patterns for indiviuduals. a middle class trans persons oppression can and often will look VASTLY different to a poor trans persons oppression bc different axis of oppression are at work. it depends on the type of person our oppressors label us as, they dgaf if anyone identifies as TME or TMA. thats a little beside the point but its absolutely contributed to how fans treat fictional trans characters, especially in the last few years

i hate hate hate the ideology in this fandom that one trans interpretation or headcanon is more valuable, or hits harder, or is more idk narratively transcendient or powerful than The Other, so The Other is deemed boring/bland/sauceless/whatever and deserves all the hate and takedowns and dismantling and nitpicking it gets. the fans of this Other Trans Headcanon deserve their hate and calls to kill themselves because theyre just Wrong About It. but thats not true. none of that is true. you just dont vibe with other flavours of fanmade trans narrative. and thats completely fine actually. its literally like preferring carrot cake to raspberry pie. it is on that level outside of transphobic biases, and i sincerely believe that a lot of fans start out on that level, but dip into transphobic biases because of the constant fucking weird moral panic about trans girls, and by extension, young trans people as a whole. which is not fine. whats also not fine is attacking fans of trans characters over said trans characters gender, canon or interpreted!!!

to tie this tf up bc i dont want this to go on for any longer than it has, im so so SO SO SO tired of fanon june and roxy being trans girls first and foremost over their actual characterization. and im even MORE tired of the word 'girl' being taken in fiction to mean dumb, sweet, (white)feminine, wouldnt hurt a fly, so so cuddlysoft, girlboss it up girlfriend, you cant sit with us, im such a cool bitch, im cooler than you dumb gross boy because im a girl, what personality i dont have one i dont need one because im a girl.

so much of fandom has forgotten that roxy is fucking mean and WILL ignore whatever doesnt fit her whims/wants and will plow through her closest friends and loved ones regardless of the situation at hand because of what she wants. she canonically admitted to harrassing dirk on the daily because she wanted him, because she was lonely and couldnt see past her own hurt to see that she was also hurting her friend. and oh my god, mom lalonde, worlds first abscent mother who swears up and down that she loves you really, rosie posie, its just that mommy's real hungover again and also very busy. that is BRILLIANT characterization for a female character, and its been forgotten behind the big pink bedazzled neon ITS A GIRL sign. and the same has been happening with june!!! and it sucks!!!! us transfems are just people we are JUST people. i dont want trans girl characters only point of characterization to be trans and girls!!!! i dont want talking heads and perfect cardboard cutouts in lipstick!!!! when june happens i want her to be exactly the same as when she was john because thats who i became enamoured with in HS1 and thats who i watched grow up in the epilogues and THATS who i want to see finally find their place in paradox space as herself. i want her personality intact, and i dont want to see her forget or turn her back on her childhood and teen and young adult years. i dont want june to be fanon vriskafied

[jocelynmakenna]

It's time for my two cents to the umbrella academy season 4 clusterfuck:

Hey what the fuck was that?

Like I was perfectly fine with the time skip and even though there were some weird choices (cough Klaus) I was perfectly fine to see where it was going to go.

But what the fuck.

Every fucking episode was worse than the one before, finding new ways to trash the characters and ruin any chance at a character arc for any of them.

The lack of discussion of prior seasons (like are we gonna mention ANY of Allison's atrocious behavior?) was kind of odd but I can move past that seeing as they got a 4 episode cut. The season tried to return to a status quo that it implied existed but never defined, leaving it feeling empty.

But let's talk about the characters MY GOD. I'll start with the obvious. Five and Lila? Why??? WHY??? Like overall, the actors have great chemistry but ROMANCE??? Absolutely not. I think a dad/daughter relationship is much more fitting for them at minimum. If I were writing this season, my biggest change to the train arc would have been to have Five with like Klaus. Giving Klaus distance from his family could have served the story better than... I don't know BURYING HIM IN A DEAD DOG'S GRAVE AFTER A WOMAN USED HIS BODY TO HAVE SEX WITH A GHOST WHICH OF COURSE ONLY HAPPENED BECAUSE A GUY WANTED HIS MONEY WHICH JUST IS SO CLOSE TO SA IT MIGHT JUST BE BUT YK GOTTA MOVE ON GOTTA TALK ABOUT BEN NOW.

Because Ben!! Spends the first like two episodes bitching about how the umbrella academy folks aren't his family (because they're not) and then he dumps everything for a girl he happened to touch(???) and then starts the apocalypse. Like congrats man on being the most macguffin of a person ever.

Viktor was overall fine. I have nothing too harsh to say about him, but once again, his acceptance of Allison in his life after she KILLED HIS DISABLED ADOPTED SON is wild. Allison continued having her character ruined by being a "bad" mom which like. Why did you destroy the original universe to get your daughter back to be a bad mom.

Diego and Luther were just. There. They took up space and screentime with nothing important nor interesting. Everything about them and their arc sucked the fun out of the entire show. Luther being comedic relief could have been a fine choice if they bothered to have him DO anything important.

I'm sorry I'm talking about the love triangle again WHY!! FIVE AND LILA AND DIEGO IS WEIRD. ITS SO WEIRD. ITS QUITE LITERALLY THE WORST CANON SHIP IVE EVER SEEN (yes that includes Reylo at least they had ~force connection~ rather than just being sad and fucking your BROTHERS WIFE). WHO YOU HAVE KNOWN SINCE SHE WAS 6. WHEN YOU MURDERED HER PARENTS. AND THEN SHE'S KNOWN YOU EVER SINCE. INCLUDING THE TIME YOUR BRAIN WAS IN THE BODY OF A CHILD. A MINOR. ITS YUCKY ITS NASTY. ITS AWFUL.

Ok the ending. Nothing pisses me off more than a show that decides to undo itself at the end (I'm looking at you Legion, you had so much promise up until the end). The cleanse was Fine. It definitely could have been done better, explained more, built up more etc. I will blame that again on a lack of episodes but there's SO MUCH that could have been cut to make the season flow better (perhaps like the 7 years of train problems!). And then the cowards move of just. Killing off all the main characters (or actually removing the characters from history. It reeks of lazy writing and just. Not caring.

Overall - 2/10

Crazy how this show ended on that season 3 cliff hanger!

[everlastingdreams]

The Weeping Monk x Reader : Born In The Dawn Chapter 16

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Story Summary: Locked inside a dark room in a dungeon, kept alive only for your power, you believed you’d never see the daylight again. That is until the Weeping Monk finds his way down and steals you from your captors. It is the beginning of a journey that leads you through hardship and newfound hope, but nothing is assured in a world that is changing for the Fey. The magic that runs in your veins is drawing out the worst the world has to offer, does it include the man who pulled you from the dark?

Chapter Title: Chosen

Notes: 

Warnings: Grief. Violence. Torture. Sexual Assault. Rape Threat. Gore. Enemies To Lovers. Pining. Trauma. Flagellation. Manipulation. Strong Language. Blood. Gore?. Misogyny. PTSD. Spicy and smut parts. Slight redemption arc.

Other warnings: Jealousy. Forbidden Love. Romance. Slow-burn…

Word count of this fic: +190K

Chapter:  16/ It’s a secret.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You had spend the day practicing to walk again, Squirrel and Lancelot took turns helping. Your leg felt better, but the fever had taken a toll on your body and you had to stop multiple times.

Lancelot was helping you walk the short distance up and down the hall, not confident enough to let you try the stairwell until you felt a bit physically stronger.

“I need to get better. We shouldn’t be staying here for much longer, there are too many people looking for us.” You said while taking the turn at the end of the hall to walk down it again.

He was using his body to balance you next to him. “I strongly discourage leaving tomorrow. Let us wait until the day after, when we are certain that the medicine has done it’s task.”

You were concerned about the consequences it could bring. “I just don’t want to end up in a dungeon again.”

He wanted to know where the fear truly lies, “Are you worried Soran will find you? Or that the Trinity Guard is on our tail?”

Both were threats, one was worse than the other. “Soran has a worse reputation among the Dawn Folk than the Trinity Guard and Red Paladins ever had. Only one other was claimed to be as bad.”

Lancelot risked asking, “Am I the other?”

You looked at him apologetically. “You were. I’m sorry.”

Past tense?

“I understand.” He could not blame you for it.

You almost tripped over a damaged floorboard and he stopped with you until you were ready to continue.

You started walking again. “Hutch and Ives were part of the Reapers’ Brotherhood. I think they never told him that they had found me, I would not have been there for so long if they had.”

It made him question Soran’s motives, “What does he want with you? He would have traded your family to have you.”

You refused to believe that the Reaper was hunting you for the same reason you had left home. “There is only four of the Dawn Folk left. And Soran has been known to have taken and caused the deaths of many of them. I am just one of the many.”

He could tell that there was a reason you were always vague about your past. There was something you weren’t telling him.

Lancelot stopped with you in the middle of the hallway, “Is there something I should know? Something you are not telling me?”

The intensity in his eyes caused you to reply sharply, “No.”

You were lying. And he greatly disliked it.

You looked away when he kept looking you in the eyes, “How did you afford the medicine? Did you take the coins from my satchel that I got off that lord?”

His voice was monotone. “I killed the merchant and threw his body in the lake.”

Shock washed over your face and you pulled yourself away from him, “YOU WHAT?!”

The slight smirk on his face betrayed him. “I traded a dagger for it.”

You couldn’t believe he had you fooled. “You’re unbelievable!”

The Monk tried to take hold of your arm again but you refused to let him help you after that.

“What if you fall?” He walked behind you.

You used the wall for support as you stumbled through the hallway with only your anger as fuel. “I’d rather have the floor touching me than you.”

Even when you heard him chuckle, you refused to look at him.

Squirrel came up the stairs and saw you walk alone, he hurried over to you and quickly supported your side, then he scolded Lancelot, “Why aren’t you helping her?!”

The smirk was wiped off of Lancelot’s face right away. “She refused my help.”

The snippy boy then said, “I’ll do it then. You go and find us something to eat.”

He looked down at the overprotective young Fey knight. “We have cheese.”

Squirrel was quite blunt about it, “We’ve had cheese for days now. Find something else. Use your nose.”

You reeled the boy in before it got worse, “Squirrel.”

The boy looked at you, then back at him, “Please?”

Lancelot’s smirk returned. “Very well. I shall see what I can find.”

You watched him walk down the stairs and Squirrel helped you back to the room to rest.

~~~♡~~~♡~~~◇~~~♡~~~♡~~~

The Monk had found some edible berries that fit well together with the cheese, and the apples he found were a blessing.

After the three of you had eaten, he had went to the lower floor to see to the horses.

It was already dark and Squirrel had fallen asleep next to you on the bed, you didn’t want the boy to sleep on the ground again.

The Monk had been downstairs for quite a long time and you considered it possible that he might not feel like coming to the room.

You knew that he was aware that you had lied to him about hiding something.

You got out of the bed, careful not to wake Squirrel as you did.

With a fair amount of effort, you got down the stairwell on your own.

Getting through the hall that led to the church-like building was another challenge.

It was there that you found him, he was sitting on one of the pews right before the alter.

He was praying…

You knew he had not seen you yet and you wanted to leave.

Lancelot did not turn around, but stopped praying. “I know you’re there.”

Dammit…

You went into the building and walked over to him, “What are you praying for?”

“That is quite a personal question.” He remarked, then turned his head to face you. “I pray for guidance.”

You went to sit next to him, “Not forgiveness?”

He sat with his elbows on his knees, his hands folded together. “Praying for forgiveness while continuing the sin is futile.”

“Why pray to a god who will not listen?” It was a genuine question.

He asked you a similar one, “Why pray to gods who hurt you when you do not do their bidding?”

“Faith?” You guessed.

He nodded. “Or habit. It is either praying to a divine power, or our minds arguing with ourselves.”

Well… he had a valid point there.

A soft laugh escaped you. “I guess we just all want someone to listen to us sometimes.”

He enjoyed the sound of that and opened up more, “I do not know why I pray to God anymore, I reach out and there was only ever darkness.”

The small smile on your face went away, “You have always struggled with serving the Church, haven’t you?”

There was not a day when he had not questioned his faith, “I have.”

A silence fell between you, and then you placed a hand on his shoulder and gave it a squeeze before letting go again.

“I think you and I need to talk.” You said

Why did hearing that, frighten him?

It was irrational, this could be about anything.

You did not leave him in suspense, “I am not sure what to think of the situation we find ourselves in. Please, do not be upset, it’s just… I never thought I would be out here fleeing those hunting us with the Weeping Monk.”

He was glad to hear that you wanted to explain how you were experiencing this. “I understand your reluctance to trust me. I did not think I would one day be out here with a Fey woman and child either.”

A small smile crept on your face again, “It’s strange, isn’t it?”

It came out like he hoped you agreed with it, “Under the circumstances, I would say we are doing well?”

“We are.” You agreed on that. “Listen, I know I am not a person who trusts others easily. But I am trying. And considering you could have just left me to die in this place instead of going through all that hassle, I owe it to you to try.”

He shook his head a little. “You owe me nothing.”

You weren’t going to start a debate over this and nudged his shoulder with your own. “Well, then I’ll just do it out of the goodness of my heart.”

He saw a chance to find out more about you now that you were in a good mood, “Can you find it in your heart to tell me the truth?”

You had hoped that he would have forgotten about you lying to him. “I meant what I said, I believe the Reaper just wants me because I am Dawn Folk.”

He was waiting for you to say more and it pushed you over the line to the truth.

“The Hidden chose me as a summoner.” You quietly confessed.

The term was not familiar to him, “Summoner?”

You explained it to him. “A summoner is a Fey chosen by the Hidden. Some Fey are more attuned to the Hidden than others and only a few can hear them. It’s why I was so surprised to learn that you can hear them too.”

“I have always tried to ignore them.” He said.

That couldn’t have been easy with how strong their pull could be.

You envied how he had been more successful. “Once they choose their summoners, they can be very persistent, as you have seen. If I had accepted their offer, I would have been able to call upon them without it draining my energy so much.”

He sat upright more, “You refused the offer?”

You nodded. “With my abilities, I fear what I would become if I was given such power. No one person should have so much power, it poisons the heart and mind.”

He made the observation, “You do not trust the Hidden?”

Trust was not easy for you, but it was not the fault of the old gods that you feared the power they had offered. “I do not trust a power I do not understand. Everything comes at a price.”

He was puzzling it together, “Your family disagreed?”

Your gaze fell to your feet. “I disappointed them. They wanted me to become a summoner, to hide while others were slaughtered. I am Dawn Folk, I won’t hide while I could be saving them.”

Finally he understood. “That was why you left.”

You nodded, feeling yourself grow quiet. “Yes. If I left, I was told not to come back.”

Lancelot and you were quiet for a moment.

He could sense that family was a sensitive subject, and asked about your accomplishments that followed your departure, “Were you able to help many Feys before those Manbloods put you in that dungeon?”

It distracted you and made you try to count them all. “I think I healed almost a hundred before I was taken.”

The praise fell from him, “You followed your conscience and it is admirable.”

Was that a compliment?

“As did you.” You pointed out with a smile.

He wasn’t sure if he deserved the praise for it. “I had no plan.”

You shrugged your shoulders. “Neither did I.”

A smirk grew on his lips. “And now, here we are.”

You looked at the horses. “With somewhat of a plan, so I suppose we are getting better at this.”

He found himself growing more and more interested in your secrets, “Speaking of the plan, this friend we are traveling to, he wouldn’t happen to be named ‘Matthew’?”

You rolled your eyes and warned, “Don’t be nosy. I might put in a good word for you, if you don’t get on my nerves too much.”

His eyes widened slightly, then narrowed as he scoffed.

You got up from the pew. “I’m heading back upstairs. Squirrel is asleep.”

It took you a bit to get to the door that led to the cloister and before you could open the door, Lancelot was at your side.

You looked at him and with a tilt of his head began to support you by the elbow.

Together you walked down the path towards the stairwell.

He was pleased to see you walk again. “You are doing well.”

You were glad too. “That medicine and salve really helped.”

At the stairwell you cast him a glance and got a bit closer, “Gonna help me?”

The question surprised him, “Not going to try on your own?”

Right away, you took a step back again, feeling a bit stupid for asking. “Fine.”

He bit his tongue and put a hand against your back. “I was not serious.”

You send him a glare but held on to his shoulder for support anyway.

Step by step you ascended, finding that it was getting easier, the last few steps you were able to do on your own.

At the door of the room you quietly said, “You can sleep in one of the beds in the other rooms, we’ll be alright over here. You shouldn’t have to sleep on the floor.”

He gave an agreeing nod, and chose the room next to the one you and Squirrel were in. “Knock on the wall if you need me, I will hear it.”

You nodded back, “Thank you. Good night?”

He gave an inclination of the head and you walked into the room where Squirrel was still vast asleep on the bed.

You left the door open a little to show that you trusted Lancelot not to kill you in your sleep.

Squirrel was snoring a little, something you had gotten used to by now.

Quietly and carefully you got back into the bed and let that snoring help you fall asleep as well.

~~~♡~~~♡~~~◇~~~♡~~~♡~~~

The screaming rang into his ears like howling wind in ice cold weather.

His body jolted awake, hand reaching for his sword that rested a little further away against the side of the bed.

He was not even sure if it had been his nightmare or real.

The cloak was left behind in the room as he moved to the one you were in with the boy.

Only his sword accompanied him as he quietly moved the door further open than it was. It was a small sign of your trust towards him that the door was not locked.

His movements were calculated and quiet as he moved to the bed.

First he saw Percival, vastly asleep. He had to move around the bed to make sure you were alright as well.

The sight of you confirmed that the scream had only been part of his nightmare, it had been the memory of what he had heard when the wolf had set it’s teeth into your ankle.

It was rare for a dream to leave him as unsettled as he felt now. Your scream haunted him, even in his waking hours.

You were peacefully asleep, it helped him put his mind to ease again.

If you’d see him now, sword in hand whilst watching over your sleeping form, he knew you would be alarmed.

That believe was confirmed when your eyes slowly opened and he almost couldn’t stop himself from foolishly running off.

A gasp stumbled out of you while jolting upright in the bed.

“I thought I heard something.” He was quick to explain himself.

“Heard what?” You blurted out.

He sheepishly admitted, “A call for help.”

It was a guess, based on how he looked at you now, “From me?”

The Monk gave a shallow nod.

This man was looking quite pale in the little moonlight the window offered.

You moved the sheets away, carefully climbing out of the bed to make sure Squirrel did not wake.

When Lancelot saw you get up from the bed, he came to your side to support your elbow.

The fact that you didn’t even need to ask just showed how considerate he was becoming.

“Outside.” You whispered and walked out of the room with him.

Once in the corridor, you quietly closed the door behind you so Squirrel would not hear. You leaned against the wall. “You look distressed.”

It was a clear statement.

He grew somewhat uncomfortable, as if he believed you would demand to know why that was.

You let a silence fall, in the hope that his answer would fill it.

He looked off to the side, avoiding eye-contact, and said nothing for a while.

“I know I have been cold to you at times. But that does not mean that I am indifferent when I see that you aren’t doing well.” You admitted quietly, hoping it would help him.

Slowly his attention returned and he began to speak. “I was asleep, when I heard a scream. I had believed it to be real until I came to see that you and Percival were safe.”

It was impossible to miss how uncertain he looked while admitting to this.

His first reaction to a nightmare had been to come and make sure you and the boy were safe?

His subconscious was worried about your well-being…

You were quiet for a while, needing a moment to process the knowledge.

Opening up to someone like this, to admit he was forming an attachment, could not have been easy.

You would not exploit what you had learned tonight. “You’re protecting us…”

He swallowed thickly and send his gaze back to the wall again.

This growing attachment could break him…

Or perhaps he was already broken by the previous one that had ended with Father’s death.

Everything felt so fragile, so close to breaking apart. The more he let you learn of him, the easier it would be to be manipulated. And yet, his trust was growing day by day.

“And I am grateful that you are.” You told him, then patted his shoulder rather awkwardly. “I do hope you get some better sleep tonight.”

He just gave the smallest nod of acknowledgment, and you found yourself under that look he had when he was trying to read your mind. You met that look with a timid smile.

Then slowly, you turned and began to use the wall as support to get back to the room Squirrel was in, hearing a quiet sigh coming from him.

“Come here.” He said while taking hold of your elbow again to help.

He helped you back to the bed, then returned to the other room he had been sleeping in.

And you caught yourself hoping that his dreams would be more kind to him in the future.

~~~♡~~~♡~~~◇~~~♡~~~♡~~~

It did not surprise you one bit that Squirrel was no longer sleeping in the bed next to you that morning. Your ankle felt much better and you could walk easier now if you took slow steps.

You didn’t find them in the room next to yours and headed downstairs. The door to the chapter house was open, Lancelot and Squirrel were standing over a table with a map.

You walked into the chapter house room and asked, “Where did the map come from?”

Lancelot gestured to the table. “I found it here.”

You stopped next to Squirrel, “Planning the journey?”

He nodded. “I am. This friend, where will we find him?”

Your eyes squinted a bit and you pointed to an area on the map. “We’ll find them here.”

A quiet sigh escaped the Monk. “Moving past Uther’s castle will be difficult, the land around it is well guarded…” His finger grazed over the map. “If we go along the villages, we will be able to replenish our supplies and we need food. But…”

You guessed what the problem was. “We risk getting caught.”

He gave a nod while studying the map. “Along the river is an option as well, but if the weather is against us then a day of rain can leave us with soaked clothes for days.”

There were valid problems he was addressing.

After some thought, you considered the path along the villages the safest. “By going along the river, we will have no shelter or food. We’ll be easy targets for wolves again.”

Lancelot was looking at you to make the decision.

But you wanted his input on it, “If you were traveling alone, what would you do?”

He would be far more reckless in his decisions.

Now there were people counting on him again.

He answered, “I am not alone now. There is a person with me who is still healing from infection, and Percival. Along the villages it is then?”

You agreed on it and gestured to him. “Along the villages. Keep that cloak close, out of the three of us, you are the easiest to recognize.”

Squirrel came up with an idea, “We can put some mud on his face, so others will think his marks are just that too?”

Was the boy really comparing his markings with mud?

You gave Squirrel’s arm a nudge.

The Monk was trying not to take it personal and remind himself that Squirrel was often blunt but still just a child.

“Your Ash Folk markings do not like mud stains.” You said, then nudged the boy again. “Right, Squirrel?”

The boy looked up at your curiously, like he was baffled that you really thought so.

“Squirrel.” You said a little firmer.

The cheeky boy yielded. “Alright, fine. They don’t.”

Lancelot did not let it get to his heart. “Tomorrow we leave. Today we can prepare ourselves for the journey.”

The Monk rolled up the map and took it with him.

Together you walked to where the horses were and saw him begin to take off all the items Goliath wore that bore the cross symbol.

“Wise choice.” You went over to do the same with your horse.

Squirrel choose to help Lancelot, the boy was getting quite fond of the black steed and it’s rider.

“What?” The boy suddenly said.

You looked over at them and saw that the question was for Lancelot, Squirrel was looking back and forth between you and him.

“Nothing.” The Monk quickly answered.

Squirrel send him a doubtful look, which the Monk ignored.

That was odd…

Once the horses were relieved off their religious symbols, Lancelot suggested that it would be best to collect anything useful you could find.

While he did his best to get anything useful out of the old infirmary, you exchanged the remaining linen from the dungeon for the cleaner ones of the abbey.

They looked eerily similar and you were almost certain that the Brothers had taken them from this abandoned abbey too.

Squirrel was searching the place and returned from the kitchens with something useful. “Look what I found!”

You turned around to see him hold two empty large woven sacks that were almost bigger than him and praised the boy for it. “Goodness. Good find! We’ll use one, can you bring the other to Lancelot?”

Squirrel was already running over to the infirmary.

Those sacks would be far more handy than having to use a linen sheet to store everything inside. You went upstairs with the sack and rummaged through the rooms and every single cabinet or chest that you ran into.

In one of the rooms you found a comb, that was useful. The room next to it, at the end of the hall, contained what you had been wishing for.

A pair of trousers and a clean long sleeved shirt were in a drawer. The shirt was a little too big but your bodice would hide that well enough.

You stuffed them into the sack for later, when there was a moment to change into them.

Once you were done with searching the room, you went back downstairs and ran into Squirrel who had been on his way to you again. “I found a comb, I can help you with your hair now too.”

Squirrel grimaced and scrunched his nose at the idea. “No.”

You were left staring at his back when the boy began to walk away.

Just then, Lancelot came out of the infirmary and must have heard the boy’s answer, he took hold of Squirrel’s shoulder and steered the boy around and back to you.

The Monk told the boy what the result would be of this reluctance, “Would you prefer to cut it off once the knotting becomes too much?”

The boy whipped his head around. “No!”

He pushed the boy in your direction “Well then. Let her help you.”

A grumbling Squirrel went over to you, and you took him with you to the kitchen and had him sit on a chair there.

by giving a little tug at his vest and cloak, you signaled for him to take it off before it would be covered in fallen hair.

Squirrel took them off and let it drop to the floor, the Monk passed by him and picked it up to hold.

The whole room could feel how Percival’s mood had switched now.

When you began, you hadn’t thought it would be so bad as it was.

You tried not to worry about it as you encountered knot after knot and Squirrel barely held back a couple of curses.

It was a continuous change between you apologizing for it and him quietly cursing.

Lancelot had picked his battles, and letting the boy curse quietly was worth it if it meant the hair would be free of knots.

“You could use a comb too.” The boy sneered.

Lancelot arched a brow at the attitude he was faced with.

“We can all use a comb.” You corrected him. “And you could really use a fresh shirt too.”

You looked up at the Monk who tilted his head in agreement.

It didn’t feel right to let the boy wear a shirt that had not been washed in quite some time, “We could wash the one you are wearing, if we had a way to dry it quickly.”

Poor Squirrel sounded hopeful, “Really?”

So it had been bothering the boy…

The Monk gestured to the boy. “I’ll take care of it.”

You stopped combing Squirrel’s hair so the boy could take of his shirt and hand it to him. Lancelot proceeded to walk out of the room with it and you continued combing Squirrel’s hair until all the knots were gone.

Two hours. That was how long it took for you to comb Squirrel’s hair, and afterwards the boy could not stop racking his fingers through it and did mention how much lighter it felt. Without having to be encouraged, Squirrel asked you for a bucket of water to wash his hair with. So, you made him put on his vest and then went outside to the cloister, where the well was, with him. Lancelot had not only washed Squirrel’s shirt, but had also put it down on the grass to dry next to a small bonfire.

“Where’s my shirt?…” Squirrel sounded utterly confused.

Lancelot was kneeling on the grass and looked up at him, he pointed to the shirt in front of him. “It is right here.”

“That’s not…” The boy came closer and inspected the shirt that was drying, then blurted out, “It is.”

Well, it must have been quite long since he had seen his shirt in a clean state.

The Monk prevented him from putting it on right away. “Wait a while, it is still drying.”

Seeing Squirrel happy warmed your heart. “You can wash your hair in the meantime. With the sun and the fire, the shirt will be dry soon.”

You turned to the Monk, “Can you fill a bucket for him, or do you want me to do so?”

He was already standing and took one of the empty buckets to fill it at the well.

With a smile, you thanked him for it, “Thank you. I’ll go and grab a towel.”

You went inside to grab a towel that you had seen in the infirmary.

When you returned, you saw Squirrel dunk his head into the bucket of water and splash the water everywhere.

“Feys.” Lancelot jested as he came to stand beside you.

You returned it, “Do you know how many paladins I have wanted to shove into a bucket of water? Is it in the scriptures not to wash oneself?”

The feeling was mutual. Some of the paladins had never bothered to keep themselves clean, not even a little bit.

He played along. “Not in the ones I have read.”

You grinned a bit. “Ah, yes. Yours tells you to pluck every wrong hair off of your face.”

He was looking at you from the corner of his eyes, a grin matching yours, “Are you calling me vain?

By waiting a couple of seconds to answer, you hoped it got on his nerves. “Not at all.”

That had not sounded genuine.

He send you a look, detecting the jest.

The splashing of the water increased to the point where drops were falling on your boots and trousers.

You took a step away from him. “While you’re here keeping an eye out. I think I will take a moment to freshen myself up as well. I found some clothes in the dormitories, so I can finally get rid of these bloodied ones.”

“Where will you be?,” He asked, then clarified why. “So we know what room not to enter.”

You thought about it for a moment, thinking about what would be easiest. “I’ll use the infirmary, there’s enough linen and rags in there to use for it.”

The Monk gave a nod and followed it up with advice. “I brought that small mirror from the dungeon with us, it is in Goliath’s saddle bag.”

Oh? That would come in handy for inspecting your back. “Great, I’ll be needing it.”

Just before you could leave, he asked, “How is your back?”

You shifted your weight to your other leg. “It no longer burns, I think the medicine worked for the wounds there too. Now I’ll just have to hope it doesn’t scar too much.”

His eyes fell to the grass.

You quickly realized why. “I’m sorry..”

He refused to let his scars hold power over him. “It’s alright. I know.”

When you didn’t walk off to do what you had wanted to do, he was aware that you genuinely regretted reminding him of his scars.

The Monk gestured towards the infirmary. “Go on. I will make sure the boy does not drown himself in the bucket.”

A laugh fell out of you and the awkward tension between you washed away. “Alright, Good plan.”

You took one of the full buckets and headed to the horses first to collect the mirror, then the clothes from the sack, and walked to the infirmary.

Taglist:

@ourlazydetectivekitten​​ @the-great-adventures-of-me​ @linkpk88​​  @fxrchxldws​​  @elenaoftheturks​​ @slytherlight​​ @beananacake​​    @crystallizedtime​​  @moonlightaura03​​  @angrygardendeer​​  @have-aheart​​   @5am-cigarette​​ @arcanenature​​  @thewinterskywalker​​ @notyourwildestdream​​ @coloursforyourportrait​​ @koressecretidentity​​ @nike90​​ @n1ghtlux​​ @rachlovesactors​​ @luckyzipperscissorsbat​​ @morena-doing-stuff​​  @the-fangirl-diaries​​ @gipsydanger17​​ @heavenly1927​​  @phantasmalbeiing  @labyrinthonmymind  @asarcastic-thiamstan​​  @rainyv-skies @kissingandromeda @stclairesplace @​​katjusja

Please let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist of this story.

[thefirstknife]

Hiiya, sorry that this mightn't be the usual lore ask you get but do you know where I can find like good LFG servers or clans? Specifically ones fine with LGBTQ+ folk? Ive been looking around for a while since theres only so much you can do solo and I don't trust the big or main sources of LFG to always have decent people, so im wondering if you have any recommendations?

I have one! Link is in my pinned post! My discord is for LGBT+ people and people with disabilities. We chat and do LFG and everything in there. Microphone is never mandatory so if that's a concern, no worries about it. There's always some event going on, you can also set up your own events to fit your time and people can join. We have an associated clan as well (2 of them now, because one is close to being full). We run all content and help people out with anything, regardless of experience. If you've never done a raid, it's okay! Someone will help to teach! We're primarily all about being chill and patient with people because a lot of players have anxiety about playing in groups, especially if you're LGBT+ or have disabilities, it can be tough. Anyone is welcome to hop on and see if they like it. Link again here too. There's a link to the clan there as well.

Also if anyone else has other suggestions, feel free to share for more options! We're at around ~400 members, though not everyone is equally active (depending on the timezone and day, there's never more than like 30-50 people active at the same time so it's never really overwhelming). If you're looking for something smaller, any suggestions are welcome here!

[mrbexwrites]

Find the Words Tag Game

tagged by @kaylinalexanderbooks in this here post. Thank you for tagging me, and so sorry that it's taken me so long to respond! I am once again behind with tag games!

Passing the tag onto @sarahlizziewrites @queen-tashie @at-thezenith @theharpywrites @meerawrites, @duckingwriting and as always, leaving an open tag for folk who want to join in :)

Your words are: eyebrow, lips, nose & fingers

I've to find the following words in my WIP: wonder, stop, cope, attempt

I've been working on the re-writes of Memento Mori part IV because each time I go back to it, I'm still not happy with how it's turning out. Meh.

Anywho, snips below the cut:

Wonder:

“I can’t help but wonder,” I turned slowly in my chair to look at Sherilyn squarely in the face. If I could stand my ground against Caleb and win, the queen of the PTA was nothing to me.

Stop:

“Deputy Ward’s an adult. He wants to climb down into the pit with the werewolf, I’m not going to stop him.”

Cope:

I bundled his clothes into a biohazard bag, and left it at the base of the table; I’d throw it into the incinerator once I was done. It was unlikely to be able to cope with burning human remains, but I could at least get rid of the clothes and any trace evidence that might be attached to it.

Attempt:

The last time I’d been on the top floor of the building, I had been dismissed over the Forbes incident on the Invesiture’s attempt to monetize me. I felt as if I was stepping into forbidden territory as I pushed open the mahogany double doors to Dr Carnegie’s office.

[kdinjenzen]

Would you happen to have your post about puss in boots' Death and thier role in the story on hand? Ive been lookin but i must be blind but i cant seem to find it

I never made a proper one, but I did reblog some stuff, I posted a biiiit more about it now but it’s not anything in depth.

I know a lot of folks see Death, The Wolf, as antagonistic or evil in the movie but… Death is part of life, Death is just there, and he’s frustrated with Puss just throwing lives away.

Death basically shows his hand early, but Puss is too afraid to realize that Death is MOTIVATING him to move forward and find an answer to what LIFE means and why it’s important.

If he wanted Puss DEAD he would have just killed him, he was already there for all of them. He’s DEATH. Not like… personified… he’s just DEATH in a physical form for the sake of the DRAMA of it all and the ACT.

See this as a great example:

First Life: Oh, you think you are better than us? Without us, you will always live a life of-

Death: Fear.

Puss: You!?

Death: I do love the smell of fear. (sniffs) It's intoxicating.

Third Life: It is?

Death: (smashes third life) Sorry to crash the party with your past lives, or, your past deaths, as I like to call them. (smashes first life) I was there to witness all of them. Each. Frivolous. End. But you... didn't even notice me. Because "Puss in Boots laughs in the face of Death", right? (smashes two more lives) But you're not laughing now... (pushes fourth life)

Puss: You are no bounty hunter. You are...

Death: DEATH. (smashes another life) And I don't mean it metaphorically, or rhetorically, or poetically, or theoretically, or any other fancy way. I'm Death. Straight. Up. And I've come for you, Puss in Boots.

Puss: But... I'm still alive.

Death: (chuckles) You know... I'm not a cat person. I find the very idea of nine lives absurd. And you didn't value any of them. So, why don't I do us both a favor, and take this last one now?

Second Life: That's cheating!

Death: (smashes second life) Shh, Don't tell.

Eighth Life: Run, Puss in Boots! Make the wish!

Death: (smashes eighth life) Go ahead, run for it! Makes it more fun for me.

… why would he do this? Why would he let him go? “Make it more fun for me?” I don’t buy it.

Death already knows where Puss is at any and every moment.

Death left Puss alone when he retired and, while it was boring, began to change his thoughts on things slightly.

Puss jumped BACK into danger to “get his lives back” so Death sprung back into action because Puss was back on the path of destruction.

Here’s the other thing… Death is DEATH… he knows when it’s people’s time to go. Which means he also had to have known Puss needed to be around to stop Jack, be around to help his new found friend, be there to regain a lost relationship, and also be there to help Goldilocks to “regain” her family.

Death isn’t uncaring… Death wants to meet Puss when it’s actually his time… Puss was going against this by being neglectful with his life.

Puss just needed to be reminded that it’s not how you die, in some heroic blaze of glory, but how you live… how you are remembered and cherished beyond your time on this planet…

Puss is a good person, but he just wasn’t being respectful of his own life and that made Death frustrated and angry.

Again… if Death wanted him dead, he could have done it at the start of the movie… he’s DEATH… straight up, not a metaphor, not “in an aspect”, he is DEATH…

It was all for show, all because that’s what Puss needed… the theatrics of it all … just to help a hero who has helped others realize his OWN worth beyond throwing his life away.

The lesson here… care about yourself, Death doesn’t want to meet you before your time. Value every second of the life you have.

[jupiter-pls]

(look, im sorry idk if read more is still a thing/on the app but i can't see it im hoping tumblr does that auto read more thing if not IM SORRY! i just need things written out for my brain sometimes)

ya girl had a cheeky weekend in amsterdam to have just one good night...and afternoon 🖤🧡🖤 it's been the. best. and i spent it with some wonderful people who im missing so, so much 💖 (there's a group photo of my pals when i had gone on to m&g round 2 with them holding up my art that makes me SOB! 😭 goodest of eggs!) and ill remember it all for a long, long time. got to give dan the new piece after telling/showing him the piece from back at the start of tour needed a companion piece & the reasoning behind it. he was so SO sweet and said how he loves my style, especially with the circles always being used (😭😭😭) and then pointed out the photo backdrop with the eclipse on 🥺 yes 🥺 love a weird wonky dan heart too 🥰 i was a bit annoyed with myself cause i felt/heard myself fully tripping over my words and ugh but! it was really really lovely...

m&g no.2 however! 💖💖💖💖 (look, i panic brought a resale ticket cause i was so nervous about the matinée getting canceled in the wake of the promoters bullshit on this tour and knew i would be beyond heartbroken if it had happened) god, that felt so so special and im going to remember it forever 😭 i got so many laughs out of him and SO MANY HUGS idk what was going on there i guess being able to actually get my words out was the cause? (just lots of thankful words for the tour, meaning i could meet my wonderful friends, the show being something so special & important and that he BELONGS on a stage that is is home!) id been talking myself in & out of taking minnie ears for a photo for WEEKS, would i be ~brave enough to ask for a photo in them? no i couldn't it's too scary! but i found the perf wad aesthetic ones for him and dlp is my favourite place in the world, this was actually important to me! (see me fully not being alright when he got that fleece thing from anaheim disneyland...if u got to meet him in that ur on my list 😭) after a moment from him of "um...what are those?!" and telling him look, it's important! we got a bunch of photos with him declaring "ok these are cute, oh my god we're so cute!" yes! ears are silly & over the top but they are fun! and cute! and make u feel like a kid! told him he probs has no use for them but he can keep them if he'd like (the orange ones...not my prince charming carousel ones!) and he was all 🥺 that's such a sweet gift thank you 🥺 (also this is all backwards, we did the ears photos before everything else). i mentioned while i was so excited for the show again, it was bittersweet as it was my last one and i love that he responded with his whole damn chest that i better make sure i make it to the next tour then...that boy is never going to stop doing shows and i love that for him SO SO MUCH LIVE UR FUCKING DREAM! 😭😭😭

i had a whole lot of feelings during that last show, "embrace the void/one good night" really getting to me after getting that most recent sketch done & all the feelings that went into that and my decision to do it...it's all so much.

ALSO! getting to meet & spend time with some really, really special people ive gotten to know in this fandom and them being what made the weekend so incredibly special 💜 saying goodbye to those folks was hard but they all give the nicest hugs. i really hope i can see them all again in the not too distant future, thank you for making this trip all it was 🥰

tl;dr dan is the best boy in the world and deserves ALL the good things in the universe & i have some incredible people im lucky enough to call my friends 🪐

[foxymoxynoona]

i have to tell you something. it’s important.

listen. i have read about close to 200 romance books this past year alone. (trust me im not exaggerating. you can take a peek at my storygraph and see for yourself the number ‘194’ on my read books list, and they’re all romance).

so you can trust and believe when i say that you’re by FAR the best romance author. the most insane thing about that? i read your writing for FREE. meanwhile i paid MONEY for those 194 books, and still, nothing on that list can top your writing.

the technical aspect of your writing ALONE is by far superior. i swear. i read these books and i wondered to myself, “does this author actually know how to write?” and i DID say that in my reviews once i was done with a book. but NOT YEW, miss foxy. oh no, not you.

not to mention your PROSE. your DICTION. good fucking lord. you know the term “page-turner”? yeah not only is your writing a page-turner, it’s also “eye-widener”. i just made that term up but it essentially means every WORD you write makes me want to quickly devour the next one. and the next one. and the next one. oh, did i mention that when i found your writing for the first time, i literally had to call in sick to work because i could NOT STOP READING SUGAR FAIRY??? I HAD TO CALL IN SICK TO WORK. BECAUSE MY EYES REFUSED TO SLIDE SHUT FOR SLEEP. THEY KEPT SCREAMING FOR ME TO DEVOUR EVERY FUCKING WORD IN THAT FIC.

and then your sense of humor. your dialogue. flowing and natural and never stilted. your characters actually talk like human beings. like us in real life. like i could actually HEAR them. because let me tell you something: A LOOOT of these published romance authors know jackSHIT about dialogue. got me questioning whether these authors actually ever spoke to a real person in their lives. it’s THAT bad. BUT NOT YEEEW. oh no, not you, miss foxy. your characters TALK LIKE REAL PEOPLE WITH TOP NOTCH HUMOR. YOUR HUMOR? UNMATCHED. AND YOURE SO GREAT AT TRANSLATING THAT HUMOR ON TO PAPER. meanwhile a lot of these romance authors attempted at humor and it just made me cringe. i cannot tell you how many book reviews ive done where i said “please don’t attempt at humor ever again”.

bottom line: you’re actually the ONE romance author who actually knows how to USE and WIELD words. you’re like THEE word-bender. (get it? avatar? sorry ill see myself out)

sorry. i just had to get this all out of my chest.

Sometimes I don't want to respond to an ask because I just want to keep it in m yinbox and read it over and over when I'm needing reassure. But this is also so flattering that I almost can't read it because it is crazy to me you'd have such nice things to say about my writing!

So thank you, thank you. Comments like this motivate me to work towards my hope of transitioning to a full time writer within the next couple of years... Maybe I can do it haha.

I love the dissection and analysis of writing. I think I'm probably miserable to talk about books with lol because whether I like a book or not is related but not the main focus of how I chew on them, I look at the sorts of things you mentioned and see what I can learn to do or not do. I think it's so cool how people's writing styles are so different and how there are so many ways ot be "good" but I do think I am finally feeling more like I have a style that works for me. I'm just relieved folks enjoy it 😅

Anyway all that's to say, thank you thank you. Your words of encouragement mean a GREAT deal to me and I will hold them close as I keep at it!

[banrions]

hi ive checked your faq & i know the answer to when will you write x is "ehhhhh, soon? hopefully?!" but i figured this is maybe a specific case! i just found your pansmione fics and loved them so, so much––i saw that the story hasnt been updated in years & i wanted to send an ask bc i know a lot of folks (reasonably) stopped engaging with hp when jkr went mask off. so i wanted to know whether its a wip that fell by the wayside or if you purposefully left it? so i know whether to hold out hope xx

sorry for answering possibly very late (i'm not on this site quite as regularly as i used to be).

ummmm. well. that one is def complicated. that's a fic that i've wanted to write for YEARS. i've had it plotted out for um, smth like going on a decade or more, now. and i only got the prologue up and complete, and haven't posted any of the main slow burn fic yet. it WAS initally def just a WIP that i hadn't gotten back around to finishing after i graduated, and then lost a lot of writing motivation in general in the last few years/pandemic etc. but always planned to return and finish.

BUT ALSO, the jkr of it all.

tbh, i've waffled a lot on whether or not to finish it. i haaaaate having unfinished fics up, so like, i wANT to. i'm gonna be real. it's smth i've wanted to write for years. i 100% want to, but i feel weird abt it, ngl. like, everyone can only make their own choices abt how to engage with harry potter/death of the author, at this point. (i personally don't want to engage in anything of monetary value, and still feel a little weird engaging with fic/fandom stuff. i don't know if that will last forever, but it's def how i feel right now). but it's still a story that was very influential to me as a kid and i still rlly love the world and the characters. and i am DEEPLY fond of the versions of them in this fic. i rlly want to write hermione and pansy falling in love. (bonus, i think jkr would hate it!!).

i'm gonna be real, i think it will dive me up the wall to leave it forever and not finish it. i've waffled a lot over the last few years between just finishing it and then being done ever engaging in hp again, just leaving it as is and calling it a wash, or something (somehow?? lol) in the middle, but i honestly haven't fully decided. i DO think abt the fic quite often, and seeing it incomplete bothers me. i haven't touched the files in years, but i have gotten some general writing motivation back reccently, though not for more than fic exchanges and more shorter things. i want to finish it, i feel like eventually i will, i just don't know when that will happen. i don't know if there are a lot of people who want it finished or not, but likely i would finish it for me if i did. i might start writing in a few weeks, i might not touch it for a few more years. i wish i had a better or clearer answer for you. i will say, i really appreciate that you loved it, and you liked it enough to reach out, becasue that means a lot and knowing someone else DOES want it makes me feel very happy<3

[caroldantops]

i’m so jealous of those who get to see bottoms there’s literally no theatres showing it where i am😭 you’ll have to give us a spoiler free review when you’re done!

HIIII IVE RETURNED!! I’m sorry babes i almost thought i wouldn’t be able to see it in theaters bc it didn’t show up at my regal til this week!!

my spoiler free review is: god i love problematic cringefail loserdyke representation. i love it so much. they are so fuckign stupid and horny and i love them.

I have seen not many ppl talk about a couple of jokes that some folks may find triggering or upsetting so I’m gonna give y’all a heads up about those just in case!

note: this isn’t a moral judgement or criticism of the film - this whole movie is centered on lesbian freaks lying to get girls to join a fight club so they can fuck. they are in tone with the movie. no need for high-horsing about it. i won’t judge if you found them funny, i won’t judge if you found them offensive, and I’m not rlly interested in any discourse about it on either side! i read these as generally satirical at least and throwaway jokes at worst - I’m just letting people know just in case it’s helpful :)

(doesthedogdie.com also mentions all of these i believe)

there are some lines that are very flippant about SA, I personally did not find them like, blatantly offensive jokes, just kind of throwaway lines about it were i was kinda like was that supposed to be a haha joke? or a like satirical moment? (again, i read them as the intended to be the latter) - some may find those upsetting, so if you wanna be prepared for it, it’s in the fight club therapy scene.

additionally there’s an ED-related joke near the beginning of the film and a VERY quick mention of suicide in like the first half(ish) hour? that one’s when they’re approaching their teacher about being an advisor for the club.

i hope that those are helpful for people but also doesn’t scare them off! at the end of the day ya gotta judge for yourself!

[sagemoderocklee]

do you think any naruto characters would have allergies to any foods? i have so many family and friends with food allergies but almost no tv shows or stories have characters like that.

anon you have come to the right person because i have food allergies and i treat lee's reaction to alcohol as a food allergy! im allergic to alcohol when ingested as a drink but if it's cooked into foods i am typically fine--which is fine cause i was never much of a drink anyways. im also allergic to wheat and soy, and am currently struggling to figure out if--thanks to long covid--ive developed an allergy to some fish or if its something else as ive been having reactions to some things but it's not consistent

i have two fics where lee's alcohol allergy is featured--Plus One and RtS--and the reactions he has to it are just pulled from my own experiences.

i haven't thought about this for other characters per say, but one thing im sort of vaguely aware of is that allergies are more prominent in america/the states because of the way our food is processed. there's an article i read recently about gluten intolerant folks in the states not reacting/having such mild reactions to bread made in europe just because of the processing of grain there vs the states. i did not try this out when i was in ireland because i was 1. anxious and 2. didn't want it to actually work and then come back to the states and not be able to have bread

anyways you didn't ask me about MY medical/food history, im just rambling, but the reason i bring this up is i guess i wonder how common food allergies would be. obviously dangerous allergies that result in anaphylaxis aren't going to be eliminated just because of how food is processed so it's very possible that other naruto characters could have or develop allergies.

sometimes allergies develop because you eat soooo much of something, so maybe like naruto develops an allergy to something in ramen lmao

i def think the only time i do see food allergies in media is when it's being used as a contrivance to create a situation where a character almost dies because of food--sometimes it's done for comedy, sometimes it's used in a more series fashion, but i think i really have only ever seen it used in that context (recently watched My Best Friend's Exorcist which was... a film. honestly disappointing but i hear the book is very good. but the point is there was a nut allergy in that and it was, again, presented early on so that down the road when one of the characters was possessed she could essentially poison the person with teh allergy)

it would be really nice to see media shift and acknowledge the seriousness of food allergies outside of as a plot device. it would be like cool to see something where it showcases that food allergies are a disability and can make you feel very isolated. like your friends all go out to eat but you cant join them--ive had situations where ppl have picked a place for a con tradition and been like 'oh sorry i guess you can just sit there' and i think ppl don't realize just how shitty that is!

anyways rambling again! sorry anon! thank you for the question!

[incorrect-koh-posts]

If Baldwin IV had a wife, it would likely have been a Byzantine princess as his uncle and father had...Baldwin III and Amaury. No romance, just a royal alliance. Consummation sealed the deal. Leprosy was not a cause for annulment, and spouses still had to honor "the marital debt."

Alright, let's talk realism for a minute.

Well, yes to the "marriage as a means of political alliance" part - we are in the middle ages, after all. While they had the concept of courtly love - which was outside the bounds of marriage - genuine romantic love between spouses was quite a rare thing and not something you married for or expected upon entering a marriage. Marriage was mainly to ensure alliances and the continuation of the family line via children. For most people, it certainly wasn't the dramatic affair that it is often presented as in medieval-themed fiction and film: though they may not have loved each other, spouses had to rely on each other in many aspects of daily life, so it was in the best interests of both partners to make the marriage work. It was, in general, not an instrument to suppress women or deprive them of their rights - in fact, in the 11th and 12th centuries marriage customs were changing and the church (yes, the church) actively encouraged granting women the right to agree or disagree to an arranged marriage.

While leprosy may not have been a cause for annulment or non-consummation of an existing marriage, I'm pretty certain it would have been seen as a valid reason to not enter into marriage negotiations in the first place. For one, men afflicted with leprosy tend to have fertility issues, so what would be the point in a marriage to a man who, in all likelihood, will not be able to produce an heir? And two, I imagine the prospective bride would have had a word or two to say on the subject of having to marry and sleep with a fellow who looks like a rotting corpse. I mean, I'm sorry for being shallow for a minute, but even if he had the nicest character imaginable, I would not be able to bring myself to touch a man so covered in sores and rashes. Sorry, but no. For that, you'd have to tie me to the bed - or forcibly drag me out of the nearest monastery medieval me most certainly would have fled to.

Also, as long as the vows had not yet been spoken, parties could withdraw from the marriage contract - with consequences to be expected for the offence given, yes, but it was possible. They didn't even have to give much of a reason. One example of this from the crusader states would be the failed negotiations for a marriage between Raymond III of Tripoli's sister Melisende to the Byzantine emperor Manuel I Comnenus in 1160 or so, during the reign of Baldwin III. The Franks, expecting the marriage to take place, raised a large dowry for Melisende, made a ton of preparations ... but the Byzantines delayed, delayed, delayed, until after a year, it was eventually made clear that the marriage would not take place after all, and Manuel married Maria of Antioch instead. As a result, young Raymond went into rage mode, equipped the ships he'd originally had built for his sister with pirates and criminals and let them raid the Byzantine coast. Which is one of the reasons why I think the Byzantines would have looked a little askance at another marriage proposition from the Franks, at least for a few years after that.

So, when trying to imagine a possible marriage for Baldwin, I think a lot of it comes down to the question of when the marriage would have been arranged. I'm not a historian, of course, so if anyone knows better, please feel free to correct me. But I somehow can't see marriage negotiations with the Byzantine empire taking place during Baldwin's childhood (before the leprosy was known), not with his mother in the picture who had effectively been replaced by the Byzantine Maria Comnena, and certainly not later when Raymond was regent during his minority. From that point in time on, the leprosy was also an issue; and when Baldwin was finally old enough to make his own decisions, it wouldn't be long until the Byzantine empire began to spiral into decline and its own problems with the ascent of the child-king Alexios II and then, not much later, Andronikos I seizing power and slaughtering the Roman Catholic inhabitants of Constantinople. So I'd say, all in all, that during Baldwin's lifetime, a marriage with a Byzantine princess would have been rather unlikely.

I think if Baldwin had married, it would probably have been some noblewoman from Europe, and I suppose they would have had to be betrothed from early childhood on, with the wife's family - for some reason - not reneging the prospective marriage once the leprosy was found out. Tbh, though, if I were to write a story about Baldwin (which I am not because there are so many Baldwin fics and novels out there already), I'd probably not give him a wife and opt for a sort of mistress- or courtly-love-arrangement instead, because a proper marriage in his case would, in medieval terms, be largely nonsensical.

Again, sorry for the rant - I hope this makes sense.

[hershelchocolate]

ALL OF THE WORMS ARE SAFE AND I AM NOT REQUIRED TO RETURN TO DEEPNEST EVER AGAIN