#sorry but like i really couldnt deal with those people anymore

[gothicprep]

like idk i'm very blackpilled on the subject of abuse. i feel like the term is often invoked dishonestly or as a way of obscuring the complexities of a situation and i'm less trustworthy of it than i should be per my moral principles. this isn't me saying that it's always a false claim or that it's never something that happens, but that i've run into enough situations where, upon asking follow-up questions, it was just a matter of standard-issue conflict, for me to have more of a critical eye here. i understand that the suspicion reflects poorly on me, but you also shouldn't lie, dude.

i guess the most consequential example here is that time i was hashtag cancelled by an old friend group bc i didn't think a mutual friend's under-medicated bipolar freakouts constituted abuse. and they acted like if i engaged in cordial conversation with him at all, this was some kind of massive betrayal. what a fundamentally stupid way to look at the world. i wouldn't call myself envious of them.

am i engaging rationally? is the example provided enough of a core memory to blind my judgment? who knows.

[dorkfacex]

Reese Wilkerson x gn! reader

Warnings: abuse, alcohol, language, drugs- yeah u get it Request: nobody asked- :,) Type: Fluff ^^ AN: guys im so sorry if this is cringe- "I hate you!" You screamed at the top of your lungs at your mom who was standing in the drive way. She had been a real bitch your whole life; never took care of you, always on drugs, you get the deal. But tonight, you snapped. You were running away. You didnt know where you would go or if you would even survive but right now you didnt care.

Tears streamed down your face as you turned around and ran down the street. Your mom was yelling at you even from here. 'God, I wish she would just give me some space' You thought to yourself. It was about 11 pm when you stopped in front of your friend, Reeses' house. It was an average, middle-class suburban home, kind of messy but- what can you expect?

You didnt see a light on in the house, but you decided to try your luck anyway. You went around to the side- where Reeses' window was. You knocked on it softly and after a few moments, the curtains covering it were opened and Reese opened the window. He noticed you crying and his face fell a bit. Reese opened the window all the way and leaned against it,.

"Hey Y/N... Whats wrong?..." He asked gently. He was always immature and stoic around most of the people he hung out with. But with you, he seemed friendlier.

You wipe the tears from your eyes with your sleeve and make eye contact with him. "I-Im running away... I cant stay at my house anymore..." Just saying this made you remember some of your childhood experiences, and you almost broke down again.

Reese nodded, you had vented to him before about some things, but you never talked over running away. He backed away from the window. "Come in" You climbed through the window, stumbling a bit. When you got in his room you looked around for a moment. It was the typical "Teenage Boy" room; Band posters, clothes, and some other trash. He looked a little embarrassed, you guessed why. You had never really been in his room before. You guys had always hung out at the gas station or behind the school. You shrug at him reassuringly because the last thing on your mind was how clean his room was. Reese finally spoke again. "So... Your staying here?" He asked as he sat on his bed next to you

"Yeah... Is that alright?" You asked hesitantly. You were so overwhelmed, you didnt really think about what would happen if you couldnt stay here. Reese had been your only friend since 3rd grade, but he was really all you needed.

"Of course" He replied softly and pulled something out of his pocket; a carton of cigarettes. "Want one? I stole them from the gas station." You chuckle softly. "Sure." Reese handed you one, and lit it for you. You took a drag and smiled softly. Most kids you went to school called Reese a douchebag, but under his cold and mean facade, he was one of the sweetest people who you had in your life.

After a moment of you guys smoking together, Reese broke the silence. "Y/N?..."

"Yeah?"

He was quiet a moment and turned to face you. You looked him in the eye also and he spoke again. "Look. I know now probably isnt the time for this. But I really like you... We've been friends forever and im not complaining but I really want more... You're perfect to me, and what you've been through makes me want you even more..."

You were silent for a moment. Every night since you met Reese, you had dreamed of him saying those words to you. And the day finally came. You couldnt help but smile, which caused him to grin at you and look away, blushing. "I love you, Reese." You finally reply, a red tint slowly appearing on your cheeks. He looked away for a moment, and then back at you. Without saying a word, he leaned in and kissed you softly. You wouldnt think he would be a good kisser- but holy shit; he totally was. He pulled away after a few seconds and gazed into your E/C eyes with a dumb grin on his face. "I think I love you too, Y/N." A/N: alright wrote this thing in about 40 mins- its really bad im sorry lmao- thanks for reading tho- <3

[bitchdafuqyousay]

Hans Fauste

An awful, metallic scent filled the hot air. Made worse by the heavy humidity that hung over their island so stubbornly, hanging around as stubborn as the beady eyed, cold, cruel people who’d made their homes here.

The closer he got the smell of cigarettes began to make itself known. The smoke from the little white and orange sticks twining and dancing with smoke from a gun. Or two. Depending on if the bastard he was marching to meet felt like drawing both this evening. Cigarette smoke, gun smoke, the salty air gently wafting up from the beach- and blood. Lots of it.

Blood, piss, tears, and vomit. 

“This place fucking reeks.” It always did.

Bronco stopped firmly before entering the pathetic excuse of an open air courtyard the complex boasted. Used to boast. It doesn’t anymore. Being a meet up for all the lowlifes on this side of the island culled any and all bragging rights. Not like there were any tenants here to brag anyways. Even the homeless avoided this place. The people who hung around here or crept over occasionally didn’t live in any of the buildings.

Roanapur’s “finest” used this place. He wasn’t one of them. And he’d never claim to be, the way others might. Don’t pretend to be something you’re not. That was a sure fire way to get a bullet to the front of your face and find your final resting place in a back alley dumpster. But he did know some, and he’d “work” with them on behalf of other people, if they paid him good enough. His eyes scanned the yard, glancing briefly over the two bodies across the way from him, heaped together. They’d either been dragged there or killed there. Bronco couldn’t tell; he didn’t really care either as he wrinkled his nose at the sight.

One of the poor bastards had pissed himself pre-mortem. Shame. That’s embarrassing, and unfortunate- but quite understandable.

And even more unfortunate than that was that they had to meet and see the man who’d put them in that heap. The one he was looking for right now. Absolute monstrous brute. He could smell the fucker’s cigarettes, but couldnt see him.

���Fauste!” 

He waited a second before inhaling deeply to yell again, “Hans-” and was treated to a face full of smoke. Cue disgusting, dramatic hacking to the backing tune of a dark, low chuckle.

“You dick-” he coughed again “-that went in my fucking mouth you fu-” 

“Loud.”

He cut himself off at the single word from the other man. It wasn’t a threat, just an observation, but better safe than sorry. And one would end up real sorry if they didn’t stop while they were ahead out here. 

“Whatever. I don’t need to ask you if you’ve done your due diligence. I can see it. Smell it, too.”

The other man smelled like blood, and that alongside the state of his knuckles screamed that shooting wasn’t all he did to those men. Fauste chuckled meanly and flicked his cigarette butt to the ground, stamping the cherry with the heel of his boot. The sides and toes of his boots also spoke of how much else he did.

“Somebody will ride by to pick those up, then hand ‘em off to Dr. Smiles to break up-” he gestured at the corpses, “Lord knows I don’t deal with that stuff and while you and yours are real good at leaving bodies you don’t do shit to pick em’ up.” 

He turned away from the courtyard to leave the damn thing’s entrance, and his nose brushed Hans Fauste’s chest. He wasn’t sure when the man had gotten behind him, last he’d looked the pale blonde was to his left. His new directional orientation aside, when’d he get so close- why’d he get so close?

“Fauste- '' he put a hand up on the man’s abdomen and shoved a bit. No give. “Fuck are you doing?” He pushed again, same result. The big bitch didn’t budge, just stared down at him with an odd look that made him sweat. His mouth twitched as Fauste’s brown eyes narrowed to slits so sharp he thought the gaze alone might slit his throat. 

“Bronco.”

The sweat turned cold, his name falling out from that man’s mouth made his stomach tighten. He wanted to get out of here. Get into his car and call the person he was third partying for and tell them to run the Maroon Company their goddamn check. Cut this interaction short as he could, he always tried to cut these things short as possible. He hated these types; people who’d been steeped in blood since they were kids and didn’t know anything else but it. Learned how to hold a knife when other kids were learning how to hold a pen. Brats from war sunk places- official and gang- who don’t know shit but kill or be killed. Sympathetic figures, honestly. But he hated them. They were barely people, they didn’t flinch at causing or receiving pain of some kind or another, devoid of empathy and had a real lack of concern for the sanctity of human life. 

Loyal though, if you could train them right. 

Hans was trained, followed around his boss like a big dog. A real big, real mean, violent, aggressive, and reactive dog. He was good to his team, though. Alex and Sam hadn’t a thing to worry about from him. Especially Alex, it seemed like he was a bit sweet on her. Hans would sink his teeth into anyone who had a pulse and said yes, hell, he’d even tried to fit his teeth into Bronco once or twice, but everyone knew he held a special place in whatever was left of his heart for the lady. And he was decent enough to Bronco cause they met every now and then. He’d mediated between people who wanted Hans and the company the blonde was with to do something for them. He’d done this several times so he was a familiar face.

Even nasty dogs are less likely to bite if they recognize you.

But that flies out the window if you cross one the dog’s lines; step on a paw or the tail. And Bronco was straining to remember if he’d done just that. 

Hans tilted his head to the left, then leaned forwards some. It looked odd, him stooping like that while his head was at an angle. And damn did it highlight the height difference between the two men. He was a big guy, and Bronco knew he was intentionally playing on that by leaning forwards to meet his eyes. 

You’re small. So much smaller than me- look how far I’ve gotta bend. Ya see? How much I’ve lowered to meet you in the middle? 

It was an intimidation tactic, and sure, he’d been on the receiving end before, but it was different right now cause it was just the two of them. Prior to this, Hans’ boss was usually here, someone who’d tug his leash and tell him to sit. But now. Now it’s just Bronco, Hans Fauste, and two dead guys at the other side of the courtyard in the center of an abandoned apartment complex. A place where undertakers lurked in the basement and unlucky bastards got their shit rocked in the rooms where people used to sleep. A breeze pushed the smell of blood from the bodies into the small space between the men. 

If I wanted to hurt you, I could. I would. What could you even do about it? I’m armed, and even if I weren’t, I’m so much bigger than you. You can’t fight me off.

“Up it.”

“Pardon?”

Hans reached out and placed a heavy hand on Bronco’s shoulder, putting the other in front of his face and rubbed his pointer, middle finger and thumb together. Money. Then he pointed at the entryway ceiling above them. 

Ah, up it. The price, the cost has risen. Their employers were gonna have to lay out a bigger amount than had been agreed on prior. Bronco, to his credit, didn’t give a shit. Sure fucking thing you big bastard, fuck em’! Make em’ pay a million US dollars for it for all he cared. But they were paying him too. They were shilling him a handful to act as a representative. So he had to represent.

“But a price was already agreed on-”

Hans shrugged dismissively, that big pale hand not leaving his shoulder even as he straightened his posture. 

“I can’t just tell them to write a bigger check without telling them why, I’m gonna have to call Bast and ask her if she’s got you asking for more or if you want a tip for your good work.”

Hans rolled his eyes like some damn teenager before meeting the older man's gaze again, “I’m just doing what I’ve been told.”

His voice was a low, gritty whisper. He didn’t talk much, whether that was a choice or a result of the jagged, pale pink tear across the front of his neck he didn’t know, but regardless he half wished it’d affect him more and make the shithead totally mute. He didn’t like it when Hans spoke, nothing good happened. Plus, he didn’t like his voice. Sounded… wrong… in some way.

“Wow, I’m one lucky bastard, getting to hear a whole sentence from you. What a treat, you’ve used me to meet your word quota for the month.” 

Bronco huffed, turning his face away from Hans and planting his hands on his hips, then looking down at his shoes. They were all dusty now. Hans’ hand squeezed a bit before leaving his shoulder. Bast had evidently approved this, he trusted that Hans was in fact doing what he was told. 

“Ugh. Right. Well, I’ll call our beloved customers and tell ‘em terms have changed and that they gotta get in touch with Maroon Company now. Fuckin’ hell. Now I’ve gotta mediate a meeting. Phone or face?”

Hans screwed up his nose and snorted. 

Yeah, pointless asking him. He wouldn’t know, didn’t care either. That was between the clients and Bast. He just did what he was told. 

Sit, stay, bark, bite. 

Another long sigh left the shorter man’s lips, and he ignored the way Hans’ eyes focused on his mouth for a brief second before they drifted over his head. Probably to admire his handy work in the courtyard. The pale man snorted again, turning away and pulling out another cigarette. Horrible habit, chain smoking. It was rare to see the guy without one of the little cancer sticks hanging out his mouth. But, in turning away, he moved, and Bronco could scoot past him and start pacing towards his car. The man snorted when he went by.

Run, rabbit, run. So, so eager to get away. Rabbit running from the hound.

“I’ll see you around, Fauste. Try not to get fatally shot between now and then.”

[aliettali]

I wanna know more about your clone ocs!

thank you so much for asking this you have opened the floodgates i am so sorry! 

i have nine: tidbit, crypt, oops, flipside, sher, intel, three-two, pint, and dangle. i’ve only (officially) drawn crypt and tidbit so far, but i do have a sketch for oops that i’ll be putting in here as reference. it is also worth mentioning that only crypt and tidbit are actually alive - the others all died so they dont have as much lore!

everyone except tidbit (crypt + co) are batchmates. the large majority of them die before they can individualize so they don’t have many unique designs my bad! also they’re all relatively young- i’d like to think that they’re fresh out of kamino and get assigned to the 501st on umbara almost immediately. and that goes SPLENDID (all of them die except for crypt, who is left to deal with losing every single one of his batchmates within a single campaign)

putting things under a "keep reading" section because it gets pretty long

crypt ct-4342:

well he WAS going to be a medic and them umbara fucked him up so severely (physically and mentally) that he couldnt deal w the hypothetical consequences of having blood on his hands anymore

now hes a slicer (he goes back to get medic certified because he does want to save people but that’s a separate character arc) 

honestly i signed him up for bad things happen bingo and he just has to deal with it

doesnt get a name until after umbara, chose it because a) encryption, slicing reference b) crypt -> grave -> his brothers never got one

facial/corneal scarring that holds his right eye slightly open+ some hearing loss that he makes up for with (unsanctioned) modifications to his bucket. outer arm scarring too because he shielded his head

tidbit ct-2719:

field medic ! hes also a little bitch but a) older and b) aware of concepts such as “emotional maturity” and “compartmentalization” so he’s doing ok 

he and crypt hit it off pretty quickly because it took him exactly three whole days of being stationed w the 501st to sprain an ankle by doing a cartwheel on a sloped floor (dangle dared him to)... but he was polite and nice and compliant in the medbay which is rare

theyre the most brother figures to ever i love them dearly

anyway tidbit keeps his hair short because he got fed up w it getting in his face when leaning over people you know how it is. never plans on getting a tattoo because he’s seen too many people in the medbay with ink related infections for that to happen, settles for hair bs instead

got his name because he tells his patients random bullshit to distract them

mostly closed off bc he’s seen a lot of troopers die (he cares far too much and it’s becoming a problem) and if he can’t save them in time then it means he’s losing those he loves because of his own incompetence

oops ct-4748 (dies on umbara): 

this motherfucker decided to catch an activated thermal detonator and tossed it back so late that he burnt his eyebrows off permanently (he also has burns on his hand but they wear gloves)

the only thing he said was “oops” so that’s his brand now

overall he was a pretty chill guy too bad he died saving crypt 

(he dies draped on top of crypt, who wakes up half thinking that they’re back on kamino in a batch pile but nope! oops is dead sher is dead pint is dead three-two is dead he can only pray that dangle and intel are alright) (crypt gets up and casts oops off and has to leave him behind, stumbling through a veritable graveyard, almost blind in one eye and teary-eyed in the other, and almost gets shot when he finally finds more troopers) (they’re the 212th but its okay they're alive and okay) (he gets through the disguise clusterfuck and crypt races over to tidbit to ask about dangle and intel) (they’re dead and gone and he has never been so alone)

flipside ct-4344 (dies on umbara):

little bitch, got his name because he really hated the kamino bunk pillows and kept flipping them over to get at the cooler side (he just ran really hot for no reason)

dies in a classic krell “push forward no matter the consequences” maneuver- he's the first of the batch to die actually good for him

was probably the closest to straight up defecting out of everyone

sher ct-4190 (dies on umbara):

the calm normal guy, he and intel are probably the reasons the batch got off kamino in the first place

slightly longer hair than regulation - he wanted to grow it out into a ponytail but guess what happened

was an older brother out of necessity but the others realized how hard he was taking it whenever any of them did something reckless and got hurt as a result so they toned it down a bit

forces crypt to go on without him when he gets shot and subsequently dies alone

he was going to be a sniper bc he always had steady hands (his batchmates always asked him to cut their hair for them) (he was trembling when he died) (i think he was too kind to survive much longer than that anyway)

intel ct-4223 (dies on umbara):

REALLY focused on making plans, the second most responsible

“guys, please, what’s the plan? we have intel for this test, we just watched the other group take it-”

“you and your intel. i say our plan is to FUCK IT and BALL” 

he and sher try really hard to manage the others. sadly kamino does not manufacture child leashes

gets killed on umbara like a good soldier who follows orders (krell tactics again)

he dies painfully aware of his own insignificance bc preciously he was driven by some hope that hey!!! if we get past this training/test/battle we won’t be forgotten but exactly three people end up remembering him as a person lmao (tidbit, crypt, rex)

i think he and dogma fucking hated each other

pint ct-4337 (dies on umbara):

the only one of them to have paint on their armor pre-umbara and thats through sheer bad luck - he walked into a room and kicked over a can of paint and got some of it on his boot toe

dies alongside intel

three-two ct-4332 (dies on umbara):

never chose a name, pretty withdrawn from the rest of his batch bc he, unfortunately, is hyperaware of his circumstances and what will happen to his brothers after the war

aggressively regulation haircut

as soon as intel and pint are killed in front of him he realizes that they might not matter in the long run but his brothers wormed their ways into his heart and now they're gone before he even chose a name. he didnt even get to tell them his name and they're dead (messes up and gets shot moments later)

dangle ct-4322 (dies on umbara):

suspiciously flexible, probably hypermobile, loved dangling (!) from the top bunk with his legs on the bed and his entire upper body just. hanging there

saw shaak ti do a sick jedi trick ONCE and decided that was his brand so he liked practicing cartwheels and splits and backbends in his spare time

they didnt have music (cant have shit on kamino) so he hummed his own and imagined dances to them

dies on umbara ft the clone eating plant thing because he was under the impression that crypt was just killed

[m0e-ru]

👀👀 also i just want to say thank you! i really got into P4 this year and finding your work only amplified my love for it. mim became like my 2nd favorite character all because of you also the stage play it really lives in my head rent free. i love your art and writings, your work has turned a special interest into an even more special one.

hi yeah I read this morning I was tearing up a bit sorrry for being an emotional baby I dont get love letters often maybe thats why im full of love . in exchange. thank yo thankyou for all the nice words it means a lot. here’s A LOT in return. with commentary because it um. was too much for the tags

okay this one was one of the drafts for my 3/20 art this year there was like. four drafts till i settled on this one then went SIKE 🏌️🏌️🏌️ you're doing the dual type ones ( the magazine ones i ended up posting )

MIDNIGHT TV STATION REAL !??? anyway here’s just shadow yukiko and iznmi interaction it’s not finished since there’s no backgrounds yet I swear there are. I did this alll the way back in feb I think and just kept polishing it bit by bit throuhgout the year and it’s STILL not done yet. the horrors came in I couldnt work on bigger pieces anymore since they wouldnt even get FINISHED anyway 💥💥💥 there’s also a s.kanji one but those are a bunch of blobs and text in shorthand mim is such a jokester asking questions n shit to twist people’s heads but yukiko’s just so sweet she really means what she says yknow like this is supposed to be the start of mim remembering what humanity is besides the mindless and selfish desires that technically gave birth to them after tearing them apart from the whole they once were. the LAST few TV stations these women were asking shit like ohhh can we hang a noose here ohhhhhhhh I want it to smell like liquor and rust and this girl was like can I have a castle !!!! can I wear a big pink frilly dress and hold a mic to push my human self’s buttons I think it could work

yeah these are my plans for the m.inaba arc for gsaslau and FUCK IM SO MAD I WAS WRITING ON THE TUMBLR EDITOR BUT IT FUCKED UP THE FORMATTING AND A WHOLE CHUNK OF TEXT IS GONE sorry this post is gonna be a lot longer than it should be okay ! gsaslau Magatsu Inaba arc. Adachi’s besties with the attendant but Mim decides they’re done with the attendant facade and erases everyone’s memories of the guy. They did a bad job at it though so Adachi’s stuck with the awareness that he has a hole in his life that could’ve been avoided if someone did a better job at cleaning up everything that reminds him of memories he’s going insane over thinking they exist when they DON’T to literally everyone else. He makes a deal with the fog to be god’s prohpet and usher in the New World as its Fool so it gives him the answer to whether or not his memories are real and worth bringing back a guy he thinks is dead. Souji tries to stop him and as much as Adachi’s trying to hide his true intentions under the guise he’s justifying himself as a bad guy this whole time, he kinda snaps under pressure that a bunch of kids are being able to stop him despite the help of a god and a world he can manipulate. Mim’s plan was to wait for his Shadow to take over so his body’s properties would be enough for him to become a vessel to manifest Ame-no-Sagiri. But THAT doesn’t happen so they did plan B: go force the power of Persona and wear it like a costume enough to hide their face to stop further awakening more memories that could throw the whole deal off. Souji recognizes that it isn’t the power of Persona so he demands god to stop using their powers through a human just to hide from something, it’s putting the guy in enough pain already. Mim agrees to leave and Adachi’s Shadow finally takes over anddd and yeah I could make a separate post about my writing I wish I had more time and energy for things

okay this one looks simple it’s likeee a manga that was supposed to be a companion piece to some writing that also didn’t get finished. so. I could share that but they’re non proofread discord messages but I promise the draft is there the context is that they’re in Okina and they try out the gacha machines. Mim’s genuinely having fun but they pull a teru teru bozu which um. remind them they’re supposed to dutiful god. like they look like a teru teru bozu. and that they’re supposed to treat this as an experiment to see humans’ true desires so they just shove it to Adachi who harmlessly relates it to them because it honestly looks stupid annd the whole tension dissipates.

here's also a bit of writing alll the way back in feb. i guess the context would be episode 13 and 14 where nanako leaves her loveline umbrella with the fox except this time she doesnt get wet since she had a pit stop at the gas station yaayy :mimyay:

The little girl left her umbrella by the torii with the fox as a gesture of her kind heart. Then she hugged the plastic bag in her arms and began to run straight home.

The rain was pouring hard! The summer wasn't as kind as her, nor would the crashing showers that would come after days of blazing heat.

Every step she took quickly became squickly and soggy as her shoes and socks were already soaked through. Her pigtails were getting heavy and her bangs almost covered her eyes. Just then, she heard a voice in the rain. But before she could look, she slipped forward.

"Ah!" Nanako gasped as she let go of the bag and braced for impact, but heard another "ah-h!" as she was quickly hoisted up with an arm wrapped around her chest, picking her up and felt another arm underneath support her. Her chin now on broad red shoulders that smelled faintly of car exhaust and gas amidst the rain.

The splashing of shoes on the wet pavement along with the crinkling sounds of a plastic bag was heard. Nanako was more worried of whose perfectly dry clothes she drenched with her sopping wet ones.

"You okay, little kiddo?" a familiar voice asked as she was gently set down on dry concrete away from the rain.

"I'm okay," she said, wiping her bangs and looking straight at the stranger in front of her.

It was Moel's gas station attendant, the one Souji works with. "Ah, you're big bro's big b--" she quickly shook her head, "I-I mean, big bro's senpai."

"Heh," the crouched man laughed weakly, it even seemed like he forced that smirk. "I work here too, y'know? Little customer."

"Oh, I'm sorry. And thank you, mister attendant."

"You're welcome, and don't worry about it. 'S not like I'm too mad about it."

An awkward air accompanied the scents of lingering exhaust from the last car and the petrichor from the rain. Although Nanako didn't feel any of this, just to say. It's always been like this with big bro’s senpai, at least how it's been with just Nanako herself. Like right now.

The man continued to crouch and adjust his hat. "Well, you're a silly girl. Why's someone with flowers all over her papers running around in the rain?"

Dunno how long, but I hope you haven't been running around like this for too long. I know you live nearby but your big bro's gonna have to take care of you if you get sick!--I mean, he'll always take care of you. He's a good kid.

If you were out long, I'm impressed how much of this you kept dry! …Just hoped you could've done the same for yourself, hehe.

Ah, but knowledge's different than wisdom, or whatever mister detective said. Hm, he even said I had neither! Maybe that's why I didn't know?

Uh…well….the fox by the shrine…. it was getting wet, so I…

Hm…

Heh, 'can see how you and that kiddo really are alike, little kiddo.

and SURPRISE !!! i found this lying around i thoughtt id add it here because youre so nice and it's so lovely to see you in my notifs all the time THIS IS A JUMPSCARE FOR EVERYONE ELSE sorrryyyy sorry

[lolotheparagon]

Good fuckin Lord if I didn't know better I'd swear some of those anons are badly attempting parody but fuckin hell, I'm so sorry you have to deal with this shit over a crappy racist game because you really don't deserve that.

Now for some positivity: I adore your art and writing and want to punt Sugarcoat so these anons can fuck off

Thanks I really appreciate it.

After seeing so many people thinking im some abused victim for being bullied into stop playing a game. I want to make this abundantly clear. I was the one who vented all my problems to the stream and wanted feedback and to be honest, Genshin has all bugged me beforehand but I had to put my foot down at one point. Even if it hurts. I couldnt excuse the game's bs any longer even if they were bringing back a character I loved, If that character rerun wasnt planned while I had this epiphany, I wouldve kicked it to the curb no problem. While I know im not a bad person for liking the good elements of Genshin, Im not going to ignore the problematic elements anymore which is why i dropped the game cos I had some self reflection. And even my friends who DO play genshin are totally okay with me not liking it anymore. I was upset when my online friends told me to stop playing the game, but it was more of my brain refusing to part with it cos of a bunch of characters I liked. This game was my comfort game for a while. The whole reason I was worried in the first place is because I was so torn between liking the game despite its flaws or its racism/sexism/perv pandering becoming too much of a problem and wondered what that said about me. But at the end of the day, I had to get rid of it because my friends matter more than some anime game.

It made me realise I get too addicted to certain characters and it makes me forget to consider the rest of the media theyre in.

Besides seeing the amount of people who also stopped playing their addictive gacha games as well was really inspiring. It made me realise its worth it cos Ive helped people in some way.

Its just a game. I can play plenty of other games. Heck, Im playing Watch Dogs Legion rn and I never realised how fun that was.

Fun fact: Lily was still friends with me DURING my Genshin phase.

[s-omething]

hi, franci. i know you liked when dad called you that, but we go by jax now. belive me, baby, it fits us better, but im here today to care for you, so its franci as you liked. i cant sleep again and tonight i caught myself remebering everything. when i say everything, its everything. im remebering when you were around 2 or 3 and dad caught a spider with his hands and showed you for the first time how things might not hurt you if youre gentle enough. you know, he fell in love with bees when you got older, those bees that used to sting you all the time at grandpa’s,  he taught you the same thing again, bees are awesome and you just have to stay calm and be gentle. i remember telletubies, bbb late night with mom, i remember when you lost a cd you liked and mom showed you how it was really not in the cd box anymore, cause you didnt believe her. i remember that rainbow you really wanted to see but you were not allowed outside, im sorry for that, you did get to see a lot of cool rainbows after it, i promise. baby, i remember you were sad that mom liked that boy she was taking care of more than you, or maybe she was just nicer to him, im not sure, but i know it did hurt a lot and you told her, i dont understand why she thought it was funny, i dont know why she said you could leave if you were jealous, she still tells that story as a joke, its never really funny. i remember how tiny your school backpack was, cause you could not fit much into it when you said to her you were leaving. i hope you know you were really small, she did not believe you would leave, okay? maybe thats why she find it funny. i want you to know that if i was her, and i wish i was, and i wish i was there to take care of you and make sure you didnt feel like you needed to leave, i would tell you that i didnt want you to go anywhere, that i love you and i do like you very much, youre very funny and smart and special for me, no one can replace you in my heart, okay? i wish you would never leave, but i will be with you if someday you decide to go. playing with you is fun, teaching you about the world is wonderful, i love hearing what you have to say. spending time with you is not a burden, baby. i remember playing outside with the other kids were scary, even if your brother was there and he was having fun, i understand kids are loud and sometimes they are mean too, i could go with you, i could hold your hand and make sure you have fun while feeling safe, so you dont have to stay in and watch tv all day. its okay to cry if you regret that you didnt go outside, but you can always try again tomorrow. im proud of you for that day you did go outside, and you did have fun. yes, most girls will be more nice to you than the boys usually are. i kept remembering that time you found a horoscope word for your sign and you misunderstood it. thats why i started remembering everything actually. because i know that word has been weighting you down since then, it still does today, im sorry. you grew up, im you, im an adult now, being lonely still haunts me. i am loved, i have people i love, you are loved. i like to remind myself that, so i dont get lost like you did back then. i remember crying before sleep because of that stupid word for a long time, i remember the night you couldnt stand rolling that word around your mind anymore so you carefully went into your parents room to tell them you were scared. i remember dad explaining the word and i remember you were still scared. baby, youre not alone. you wont be alone. im here, i will be here waiting for you to grow and i will not let you feel alone. its so strange to look at my hands and understand they were once so small and unsure. i guess i carried the feeling with me, but disconnected it from myself in a way. baby, i want to talk about things i know you will not be ready to hear and understand, and you shouldnt be, and im sorry you still have to deal with it without being ready, okay? i know its scary, it feels wrong and you dont know why, i know you dont have the words to try and explain it. you do not have to. its not your fault. i wish i was there to stop it, i wish i was there to protect you and give you the words for whenever you needed them. im here now, but its too late. im dealing with it, sometimes i cant stop my mind from running those things around all day long when its too quiet. but im here, we survived and we did talk, we did find the words and at some point we did understood. baby, im sorry you felt more scared than angry, you are allowed to be angry. your body is still yours, you are not pregnant and you are not dirty, i promise. if something feels wrong, run away. if you cant move, try to scream, okay? you can just scream for help, you can scream “no”, anything. you can scream, you dont need to behave and you dont need to be quiet. being quiet is not as good as everyone keeps saying it is.  when everyone was getting sick, you were scared the world would end and you were scared of dying, i remember cleary, one night you couldnt breathe and you were thinking how you would tell mom without bothering her because dad was not home and you didnt know what else to do. i remember being in the car, i remember the doctor calmed you down with a joke about pigs. he was right, you can calm down, youre alive, but i know he didnt tell you why you couldnt breathe. baby, you were just scared, okay? your fear was just too big, thats why your brain forgot how to breathe. when you feel like that, you have to teach your brain how to breathe again, in and out, slowly, you will feel better soon. drink some water too. i remember dad was home when you came back. he was watching avatar and you drank tea with him, right? im thankful to you for enjoying those moments. im glad he was there to calm you down a bit more. baby, i know youre still scared about the world ending, i know youre worried about all the trash, polution and all those animals being extinct, i know it keeps you up at night like that night you couldnt breathe and like those nights with that word stuck in your head, you should tell dad about how you feel, he will clear your mind and even it all those big things dont go away, i promise understanding better will make they stop being so loud at night.  i know mom says mean things about you sometimes, she is wrong, okay? i know you believe her, but she is lying, she is not really angry at you. she is angry at herself and its not your fault, she should not let it out on you. youre just a little kid and its not fair. please, remember this. you dont need to change, you dont need to fix her, she will not listen and its okay. its not your responsability to try to fix those things, just dont believe her. i know with time you learned to be more quiet, i know you erased yourself a bit just so she would not see you so much, you should not be quiet for her shouting, you are not those bad things she says, you are good, you are smart and strong and you do behave very well, even when you shouldnt. i love you, i trust you, im proud of you, you are very kind.  i remember some scary things that i still dont know how to talk about, i hope you can forgive me for that. i want you to know i forgive you about all the silly and bad things i remember you did too, i want you to remember something, okay? youre a kid. it okay to be angry. its okay to make mistakes. i forgive you. its okay to to things that are not allowed sometimes, i am an adult now and i want you to know that breaking the rules they gave you is not as bad as you feel it is, you do not have to carry all that guilt around, i promise those things are veeeery silly.  by the way, you do not have to hang out with those girls, they are mean to you and mom should not be telling you who you have to hang out with if you dont really like them. if they are mean, they are not friends. you will have kind friends who like you for who you are, i promise. yes, you deserve people who like you, and you should not stay quiet when someone is mean to you, but i know its scary, its okay if you dont know how to react and i know getting into fights would be scary too.  i remember pretty well, you look in the mirror sometimes and youre terrified of people realizing youre not a “real girl”, right? theres nothing wrong with you. theres nothing wrong with your body, its changing now and it will change more later, you dont have to worry about being a girl or a boy or neither. youre beautiful, nothing will change that. people are not looking at you and wondering anything, people dont really care. yes, men on the streets are weird and scary sometimes, stay away from them, okay? they do not define you, they should not be looking at you at all, changing how you dress does not define their behavior, they are just disgusting because they are.  thats as far as we go as little kids, i wish i walked all those steps beside you, baby. im sorry i could not, turns out you still have to grow for me to be able to tell you all this. and you will, you will grow and you will learn things and find yourself and things will keep changing, you dont have to be scared, you will be okay. dont let them be mean to you. dont let them make you feel stupid or dumb. you are bright, its okay to learn things in a different way and understand the world in a different view, its okay to feel things a little bit too much, just dont let those feelings swallow you. youre bigger than them, they just look big because its their shadow youre looking at. i love you, baby, im here. 

[tendouluvr]

not telling them you’re pregnant - f!reader

- fluff, sliiiight angst maybe

- characters: suna, sakusa, semi

- warnings: pregnancy (i don’t go into detail of giving birth or anything), cravings, morning sickness aka throwing up, two mention of the act of sex in semi’s, some cursing

- wc: 1.4k, 888, 946

a/n: it’s f!reader cuz pregnancy but there’s no specific pronouns/gendered terms used

also idk how suna got so long, he was the last one i wrote for bc i couldnt think of anything lmao

[2. iwaizumi, atsumu, kageyama]

SUNA

#! suna has been practicing late into the night the past few weeks

#! there’s a big game coming up and the entire team is feeling the pressure and adrenaline from the crunch time

#! you haven’t been feeling too good lately, a lot heavier and more tired than usual

#! thinking it was just stress from work and the missing presence of your boyfriend, you pushed through it and thought it would go away in the next few days

#! unfortunately, luck wasn’t on your side and you started to get sudden needs to throw up

#! it didn’t take you long to realize why your physical and mental drive have been down lately

#! you’re pregnant

#! or you believe you are

#! you bought a few tests, some of different brands so you can have a variety, and headed home to confirm your suspicion

#! a few minutes later, staring back at you was multiple positive symbols and the bolded ‘PREGNANT’s

#! taking a few deep breaths, you decided to tell suna tonight once he comes home

#! you thought it was better to let him know as soon as possible

#! it wouldn’t hurt anyone plus the faster you rip the bandaid off, the easier it’ll be to deal with it

#! so you waited

#! and waited

#! until 11pm that night, when suna finally came through the front door

#! “tarō! how was practice? can we talk?” you hurriedly greeted him

#! he was taken aback, not expecting you to be right beside him and in his ear as soon as he came in

#! of course you weren’t, you made sure to put some space in between you and him

#! but suna was stressed and tired, so everything is intensified to him at the moment

#! “can you back up?” he mumbled, pushing his way from in front of you to walk to the kitchen

#! “oh, sorry. can we talk?” you sheepishly smiled, hoping he would say yes

#! you’re not blind, you can tell that suna was tired but you really didn’t wanna put this off

#! you were just gonna tell him, he gets surprised, you both talk it out, and then go to bed and continue figuring things out tomorrow morning

#! but before any of that can happen, suna bluntly told you, “no. i’m tired. i’m sure whatever it is isn’t a big deal. can it be tomorrow? i wanna sleep.”

#! you didn’t get to answer before he was already walking away to the bedroom

#! understanding where he was coming from, you mentally agreed to talk to him tomorrow. one day wouldn’t change anything and you’ve seen plenty of people not tell their partners until a few weeks in

#! he was right, it wasn’t a big deal (yet)

#! so you waited until tomorrow

#! and waited

#! and once again, he came home late

#! “hey! can we quickly talk, babe?”

#! “i’m tired. tomorrow, okay?”

#! “oh, okay. night, rin!”

#! “g’night.”

#! night came and there was still no talk

#! this continued on for about 2 weeks, you finally choosing to not care anymore and just let him find out whenever he finds out

#! technically, you could’ve just blurted out a simple, “i’m pregnant.” any point during your nightly five seconds conversations

#! but seeing that he really was tired, springing it onto him would either put him in a full body shock for three days or he just doesn’t fully process your words until three days after

#! a month has passed, your stomach was still barely showing like most women at their one month mark

#! you decided to book an appointment for a checkup, it’ll be while suna’s at practice

#! and that doctor appointment was the exact reason suna found out

#! he was at practice when komori entered the gym

#! he had a doctor’s appointment for his annual checkup, and that’s where he saw you

#! you didn’t see komori, busy reading the directory to find your way to the right office

#! but he saw you on the way out. seeing that you looked a bit busy, he chose not to greet you and just quickly walk to his car lmao why is this funny to me

#! entering the gym, he greeted everyone and apologized for his tardiness even though it was excused

#! walking up to suna, he tapped him on the shoulder and quietly told him, “i saw yn at the hospital earlier. it’s been awhile since we all got together huh, they looked a bit different.”

#! ok so komori, being the smart person he is, deducted that you were pregnant when he saw your finger pointing at the ob/gyn office

#! and he genuinely thought suna knew so his comment was suppose to be a small joke that was meant to tease suna and his sex life

#! suna, however, was confused

#! look different? did you get surgery?

#! “what do you mean?”

#! komori rolled his eyes and gave a sweet smile at suna, “congrats you two! when were you gonna tell the rest of us?”

#! suna: 👨‍🦲 huh

#! “are you guys not pregnant?” he blinked at suna’s frozen reaction

#! suna became unresponsive so komori just walked away mumbling to himself about being sure he read the sign right

#! a loud whistle blew and it shook suna out of his daze, everyone got ready to play a practice game of 3 vs 3 while suna ran over to the coach

#! “hey coach, um i think there’s an emergency at home. can i go? ok thanks.”

#! his coach just stares after him as he sprints off, you think? is there an emergency or not?

#! suna quickly drove home, he may or may not have speed a little, and entered the apartment

#! “yn? baby?” he called out only to be greeted back with silence

#! probably still at the hospital....what were you doing there? he thought to himself while rummaging around the house to find anything that could give him somewhat of an idea

#! he was digging around in the bedroom when you came home, his head so frenzied he didn’t hear the front door open

#! but you heard the ruckus from the bedroom and immediately went into fight or flight

#! panicking, you took out your phone to call suna while quietly opening the front door to make your way back out before the intruder catches you

#! the phone rang and rang until it was picked up. “suna?” you whisper-yelled into the speaker. you had a habit of calling him by his last name when you were freaking out. he noticed and was equally alarmed

#! “what’s wrong?” he whispered back just as panicked

#! “there’s someone in our apartment. can you come home?”

#! “huh? oh, are you home?” he cackles into the phone speaker making you move the phone away from your ear, “it’s me, sweets, c’mere.”

#! you warily walked on your tiptoes over to your bedroom, peeking your head in and what a surprise, it is suna

#! “jackass! why are you home?!”

#! “why didn’t you tell me?” he cut straight to the point

#! “huh?”

#! “you’re pregnant. when were you gonna tell me?” his voice sounding stern, but the quiet smile dancing on his face tells a different story

#! “i tried.”

#! “huh? what do you mean?”

#! “all those times i asked if we could talk. i was trying to tell you.”

#! his heart dropped, eyebrows furrowing, while he stared you down

#! suna became unresponsive once again, standing there trying to think back to the first time you asked him

#! two weeks ago

#! “i’m sorry,” he quietly whispers

#! “hm? i..it’s fine....i was a bit sad, but i’m over it. at least you know now,” you casually shrugged it off like it wasn’t a big deal

#! “no. i shouldn’t have pushed you aside like that. even if you weren’t pregnant, even if you had just wanted to tell me about some stupid video you saw that day, i shouldn’t have told you off. i’m sorry, i love you a lot and you deserve so much better.”

#! “tarō, shut up. i accept your apology and i forgive you, now make it up to me by giving me a back massage while i show you the ultrasound pictures!”

#! he kisses you before lifting you up bridal style making his way to the bed

SAKUSA

#! contrary to popular beliefs, sakusa is not an obsessive germaphobe who finds everything disgusting but you

#! he wouldn’t be playing volleyball if he was that afraid of germs,,,,,

#! yes, he cringes if random little kids grab onto him after games because 1) he’s drenched in sweat and that feeling is not fun

#! 2) he doesn’t even know themmm

#! and 3) he wanna go home

#! but sakusa loves you and if you happened to get pregnant, he would love your kid(s) just the same

#! however, he never told you this. he never really had a reason to voice this out loud

#! so when you actually did get pregnant, you were confused

#! the only interactions between sakusa and kids you’ve seen multiple times were the moments between him and his fans

#! you guys have been to family parties and his nieces, nephews, and cousins looooves him

#! maybe it’s the fact that he’s a tall looming giant and they just want to climb

#! but besides those moments, you don’t recall him ever telling you upfront that he wants children of his own

#! and the constant stress and pressure he always seem to be working around also doesn’t help reassure you in any way

#! being an athlete for a living means always watching your body, health, and looks for the cameras (but omi could care less about the last thing)

#! he also has to make sure whether or not he’s working well with his teammates, practice and improve on anything he’s having problems with, and deal with atsumu’s dramatic ass

#! you’re an overthinker and because of that, all of these reasons were just reasons for you to postpone the pregnancy news to your long term boyfriend

#! it wasn’t too hard anyway, considering practice runs late sometimes and he’s busy majority of the time doing other stuff

#! when you guys do have alone time together, you both are so focused on one another that you actually forget that you’re pregnant and you never told him

#! you’re about to hit the three months mark now — time goes by fast — and sakusa has noticed you and your body changing

#! at first he just thought you were going through a phase of cravings and a bit of bloating, so he didn’t mention it and just let you be

#! he never got to witness you getting morning sickness because he goes on early runs or he was just out doing morning errands so he wouldn’t have to deal with it later that day

#! so when he caught you in the kitchen cutting up a lemon, the last thing he was expecting you to do was bring the lemon directly up to your mouth

#! “uh, what are you doing?” his deep voice caught you off guard, effectively stopping the hand that was holding the lemon

#! you just stare at him, not wide-eyed, not surprised, just stare

#! “eating a lemon.”

#! “i can see that.... why exactly?”

#! “dunno, the baby i guess.” you casually shrugged it off before popping the lemon slice into your mouth

#! “ah-,” he opened his mouth to stop you from eating the lemon, your words not fully processing in his mind, but cut off midway and froze when he finally realized

#! hearing him pause like that made you suddenly remembered that you never told him you were pregnant

#! you slowly turned back to look at him, mouth still slowly chewing the lemon slices

#! a moment of silence later, he unfreezes and just starts stiffly walking towards you

#! he grabbed you by the shoulders, made you look him in the eyes, before whispering, “you’re pregnant?!”

#! “y-yes..”

#! his eyes were wide, black pupils expanding as he stared you down, his lips slowly curving into a small smile

#! “you’re pregnant....,” he whispers, mainly to himself, hugging your head into his chest

#! “mhm, get off me i’m trying to eat,” you gently pushed him off but he wouldn’t budge

#! “omiiii please, if you get off i’ll give you a slice,” you tried bribing him. he couldn’t tell if you were being serious or just teasing

#! “no.”

#! “um ok, two slices?”

#! “no.”

#! “omi!”

#! he giggles before opening his arms to let you go

#! “why didn’t you tell me?”

#! you didn’t reply right away, making him start to overthink

#! did you not want the baby? or did you not want a kid with him? did you not want to be with him anymore? or was it not his?!

#! he childishly shakes his head side to side at the last question. he knew you wouldn’t do that

#! but you were still silent, making him nervously glance at you from the side

#! “sorry, piece of lemon stuck in my teeth. i just forgot to tell you,” the words easily flowing out of your mouth nonchalantly

#! sakusa’s fingers were literally about to start twitching from anxiousness beside you

#! a sigh of relief was heard from him and you turned to look at him

#! “you okay?”

#! he doesn’t answer, just gives you a smile and goes back to hugging you from behind

SEMI

#! you were currently sitting on the couch in your shared apartment waiting for semi to come home

#! he’s been on tour for a few months now, you both kept in touch by facetiming, texting, calling, and any other methods of virtual communication

#! you would tune into the live recording of all of his performances when you had time so you could watch him

#! a few weeks into tour, you suddenly felt different than usual but shook it off as nothing and probably just you missing your boyfriend

#! you believed that until one morning you were woken up by the sudden urge to throw up, dashing to the restroom as fast as your drowsy body can go

#! it was then that you realized you might be pregnant

#! the night before semi left, you both had sex to enjoy your last few hours together before he had to leave for a few months

#! with the new realization, you quickly dressed yourself to make a short trip to the store to pick up some tests

#! after half an hour of looking at yourself in the mirror, trying to wrap your head around this, you finally opened the first box

#! a few minutes later, all 5 tests were lined up on the bathroom counter showing positive

#! you stared at the tests, trying to make sure you weren’t reading it wrong

#! once you began to understand the responsibility of being pregnant a few hours later, you made a mental note to go out and buy some food for yourself the next day

#! you decided to sleep off the rest of that day

#! through all of the facetime calls with semi, you never once told him you were pregnant

#! you knew that if you told him he would freak out and either demand to go back home, or stay but all of his attention would be on you being pregnant alone at home for the rest of the tour

#! so here you are now, sitting with a 4 1/2 months baby bump waiting for your beloved to come home

#! it was around 6pm when the front door opened, sounds of shuffling bags and heavy steps could be heard from the musician

#! he cursed under his breath when he almost tripped over a duffle bag with some of his loungewear, calling out for you as he walks further into the apartment, “baby? i’m home!”

#! he was about to speak up again when he saw you asleep on the couch

#! bouncing his way over, he got onto his knees at the edge of the couch to observe your face. god i miss you, he thought to himself

#! he gently shakes you awake, you jolted in surprise not knowing you fell asleep in the first place

#! “hmm- what?,” soft murmurs falling from your lips as you adjusted your eyes at your surrounding

#! “eita!” he grinned at you, both of you pulling each other into a hug

#! “fuck, i miss you so much.” he whispered into your ears before placing his face into your neck

#! “i miss you more.” you tightened your grip around him making him move up on the couch to get more comfortable

#! you both moved around until he had you cradled in between him, your back against his chest

#! his hands going under your his shirt to caress you there when his movements stopped right on top of your stomach

#! it was silent as his warm hands rubbed your stomach in circles, the gears turning in his head

#! “are you- you feel- why’s your tum so round and hard?” he quizzically asked, still rubbing your stomach

#! “pregnant.” your voice a low whisper, he almost didn’t catch it

#! “what?”

#! “pregnant.” you repeated, a bit louder this time

#! “huh?”

#! “pregnant!” you sighed, moving his hand so you can get off of him

#! he grabs your wrist to stop you from walking away and turns you to look at him

#! “you’re pregnant?!”

#! “i just said that. yes.”

#! you knew you sounded blunt and a bit mean, it wasn’t his fault he doesn’t know at all, but your hormones have been making you crankier and it’s out of your control

#! “sorry. yes, i’m pregnant.”

#! his eyes continuously darts up and down from your eyes to your bump

#! “how long?”

#! “since you left.”

#! “was it the night before?” he was referring to your act of intimacy the night before he left

#! “yea.”

#! “wow. why didn’t you tell me?”

#! “because.”

#! “‘cuz what?”

#! “because i know you. you would either stop touring and come home, or stay but lose focus. i was just trying to not distract you because i know how important your career is to you. and because i thought that you’ll be having a six months break after this tour before your next comeback, i would tell you when you came home. i’m sorry if you’re ma-,”

#! “i’m not mad. oh don’t cry, babe, look at me.”he carefully cups your face, “it’s okay, it’s okay. i get why you kept it from me. and now that i have no schedule for the next six months, i can be there for you until the end of your pregnancy and the beginning of our baby’s life alright?”

#! you weakly nodded against his palms, and he brings you back down to lay your head on his chest as you both softly talk about the past months without each other

[cottoncandy-jester]

✨lie down darling Its time for a dream✨

Faking it (dad squad)

So basically this is what happens if the dad squad found out reader faked an orgasm before

This is of course 18+ and the reader is female

Daichi suwamura

Okay so daichi honestly was never worried about y'all sex life

Like you moan his name everytime why is he worried

It's when you and the rest of the karasuno group get drunk and play truth of dare

When it's your turn.. you're drunk off six shots of tequila and tanaka asks you to reveal your deepest secret

"okay okay! Sooo during me and daichi's fourth anniversary, we fucked and I may have totally faked it"

Wait what.

WHAT?!

Everyone else is laughing but daichi is over here having a mental breakdown

You did what?!

How many more have you faked?! Were they all fake?! Did he ever really make you cum?

It did not take long for daichi to drag you away to the nearest bathroom

You gasp when daichi pinned you against the wall his mouth attacking your neck while his hands roamed your body now gripping your hips as he ripped your panties off.

"faked an orgasm?! Damn it how many did you fake? Doesn't matter don't tell me. I'm going to fuck you against this wall and you are going to cum over and over til I know for sure you like having sex with me"

He fucked you until you couldn't think anymore, he also made sure EVERYONE heard it.

Tooru oikawa

You were having girl talk with the other managers and the topic of sex came up

They all assume he's some sex god which makes you laugh

Oikawa is honestly such a dork during sex that you couldn't help but spills beans

"honestly he was so nervous during our first time, It was so cute..though he didn't really make me.. y'know"

Oh BOY

News travelled fast and before you know it at 4am you had a pissed oikawa at your door

The loud harsh banging interrupted your sleep and you went to the door only to see oikawa standing there, your sleepy eyes trailed his body up and down and you noticed he was gripping his phone so tight his knuckles turned white, you didn't even get to speak when the male stormed inside and let's out a frustrated sigh.

"why are rumors about me being bad in bed spreading around?!"

"I dunno...maybe you have a hater, babe it's like 4am..why are you here?"

Oikawa snapped his head towards you before walking towards you anger fuming towards you before he gripped your arm tightly.

"everyone is saying you started the rumor, so tell me little cutie what the fuck have you been saying?"

Your eyes got wide as the conversation with the girls resurfaced in your head and you softly reached out to put your hands on his cheeks which made him relax but he was still clearly annoyed.

"sorry, tooru it was just one little story. Girl talk y'know and it's fine lots of people can't make their partner cum their first time you just ha-"

You were cut off by the male roughly pulling you towards your room, everytime you tried to speak oikawa would glare at you before demanding that you shut up. Once in your room he pushed you on the bed his ego clearing having dropped now that you admitted the truth.

"I am good at sex! I am Great! I just have to prove to you that you are with the best man ever"

As he spoke he started to strip before his cold glare landed on you before he crawled ontop and wrapped a hand around your throat.

"you are going to be begging me to stop making you cum once I'm done with you"

He made you tell everyone that you cummed extra hard that night, even if it was super embarrassing to say.

Tetsuro kuroo

You two were arguing

It started with him being jealous of a person at work flirting with you and it just blew up

Screams and swears shooting back at the other

Low blows were dealt

You both don't even remember what the fight was about

Then..you said it

"God you are so cocky! It's shit like that, that make me fake orgasms during sex"

He shut up after that one for sure

All he can think about was how many did you fake and how he failed as your lover

Why didn't you tell him you weren't feeling good during sex?

Kuroo remained quiet as he let his brain think, after saying it you quickly walked over and hugged him hoping he wasn't angry at you

"baby! I'm sorry I didn't mean it, I was just upset and you were just upset you forgive me yeah?"

"how many times?"

"that doe-"

"how many damn times?!"

You flinched when he forced you to look at him showing pain in his eyes and you couldn't help but be honest with him.

"only a few, during those times where I was just really sleepy that's it"

Kuroo let's out a shaky sigh before he peppered soft kisses along your neck. He was pretty hurt at the moment but he did want to make it up to you, plus make up sex was always good

"come, let's talk this out yeah?"

His tone was soft as he guided you to the bedroom thought talking wasn't the plan he had, he wanted to make you see stars and make sure he could actually make you cum.

Koutaro bokuto

Okay so maybe it wasn't a good idea to pump up bokuto's ego every time you guys have sex

All your praise makes him think he's the best in the world

But when it came time for a girls night at you and bokuto's place stuff starts to spill

You told bokuto to spend the night at akaashi or something but you didnt think he would come home

"sooo [y/n]! How is bokuto in bed?! We gotta know"

The question made you embarrassed while bokuto stood outside you guys' bedroom listening in

Yes dear wife tell them how my sex is the best in the world

"koutaro, tries his best. Sometimes he gets a little too excited and cums early so he gets too tired to finish and we end up cuddling before I can climax so I just fake it"

WHAT?!

Bokuto automatically swings the door open scaring both you and the girls

He is legit tearing up and about to sob

After, very quickly telling the girls to leave he cries into your stomach while you pet his head

"why didn't you tell me?! I would have made it all better"

"oh..kou..it's no big deal"

Your soothing which would usually work just wasn't working right now, bokuto sniffled as he looked up at you with tearful eyes, you were his baby owl and he couldnt even make you feel good?!

He couldn't believe that! No he won't accept that! Before you can respond bokuto pushed you down on the bed before starting to pull your pants and underwear off your body

"kou! W-what the hell?!"

"just let me do this please! I need to know that I can do this, I just want you to be happy with me..so..let me worship you"

You were shocked but shuddered at the feeling of soft kisses against your inner thigh, with one final sniffle bokuto was now focused on something else.

He proceeded to eat you out that night until you cummed so much that you was sobbing but by the end of it he was so happy to know that he can make you cum and of course he was more mindful about your needs.

Wakatoshi ushijima

Oh jeez

Okay so he makes it very clear that bedroom talk is off limits

What you two do in bed is your business hell you guys don't really talk about sex and spend more time just doing it

You are very tight lipped about your sex life but tendou Is a very stubborn guy

He is constantly asking you what's it like..mostly cause he wants to tease wakatoshi

After finally bothering you to the point where you wanna hit him you confess

"toshi is great okay?! I mean sure he has his moments of not really getting me there but it's good so stop asking!"

OHOHOHO HE HAS TO KNOW MORE

after explaining that wakatoshi tends to be boringly vanilla you expect him to let it go

No bitch this is tendou 'i give no fucks' satori

Proceeds to tease wakatoshi about it every chance he gets

"wow who knew you could be boring in all departments"

"sooooo, you really like it vanilla huh?"

Of course oblivious wakatoshi doesn't pay him any mind until a drunk tendou spills the beans

"guess who told me that you're boring in bedddd~ pfft she said you are so slow that it is like fucking a box"

You of course didn't say that but you were shocked to see wakatoshi at your door the next day

"did you tell tendou about our sex life?"

Well fuck.

you honestly should have expected this. You let out a shaky sigh as you merely avoided eye contact you felt pretty embarrassed and ashamed

"yeah, sorry toshi he kept bugging me about it"

"you telling him is not why I'm upset"

You were honestly shocked and looked up only to see wakatoshi's face close to yours, his eyes were intense and honestly gave you chills.

"did you say I was boring during sex? Is this true?"

"um..yeah but it's okay I mean it's still good it's just very..typical I mean we do the same stuff all the time and you just tend to be, slow"

Wakatoshi was a little shocked by your words but he calmly sighed and ran his fingers through his hair as he tried to think of what exactly he needed to do.

"then my future wife, allow me to spend the night making you feel good instead of myself, you can tell me exactly what I need to do in order to bring you to climax again and again."

And you did exactly that, he was quite obedient and even did things he never done before just so he can make you feel good.

[autisticzukka]

what is this hakoda zuko arranged marriage you speak of? i am intrigued

okay so the long story short is that it’s a slight rebuttal of a popular post that is very fun but i find like... unrealistic in a really intriguing way like, how would this ACTUALLY play out. I’ve talked about it at length in my server a few times, and it’s one of those AU’s -- like the genderbend zukka ATLA rewrite or the zukki fic that starts with sokka failing to assassinate zuko -- that lives rent free in my head and I’ve written a couple thousand words for.

tw for like VERY unrequited zuko in love with hakoda and the inherent comedy of sokka being in love with his fire nation stepmom.

so here’s hakoda, chief of the southern water tribe, happily not-married to Bato. and here is a more balanced war, where the north and the south are actually  allies, rather than whatever the fuck they were in ATLA. Yue already has a fiance and the Northern chief refuses to remarry. that leaves hakoda responsible for biting the bullet and doing a political marriage even though, as he points out at length, he is an elected official and if he stops being elected it’s no longer a marriage with the chief of the south pole. intelligently but mostly selfishly motivated (yue’s fiance is his nephew, after all) pakku points out that its not like the fire nation knows... that. the fire nation is dumb. ozai’s stupid.

faced with such inarguable points hakoda stiffens his upper lip, pre-emptively ends things with bato on the understanding that if this is another kya situation they’ll get back together and that he’s still the most important person to him but the tribe comes first yada yada, and deals with katara throwing the mother of all tantrums. it is slightly softened by the fact that in return for him marrying the fire nation noble, a thing everyone can agree isn’t traditional, the north has finally agreed to train katara. she heads out before the wedding, in protest but also so as to not cause an international incident.

(on her way, she’ll find aang. with the war less dire, katara will be sympathetic towards his desire to live without committing violence, even if she deeply can’t relate. they’ll have a hot girl romcom summer of self discovery and coming to terms with the dichotomy between duty and love as they become master benders. at some point they pick up toph. they ARE a throuple.)

sokka meanwhile is like.. not cool with it.. but ? kind of relieved? like. he’s the eldest kid. he’s 18, and he’s been a man of the tribe as far as legalities for several years. it would have been entirely understandable if his dad had asked HIM to do it. he had his emotionally crushing romance with yue, and as much as he was like ‘im kind of a prince’, he finds he doesn’t actually want some of the responsibilities and demands that would bring. yue’s life sucks.

back in the fire nation, zuko never demanded a quest and never went on it. he’s spent years hardening into something that, while brittle, can survive the pressures of the court around him. he still has his scar. he still wants his father to love him, but he knows by now that it’s not something he’s capable of earning. he watches his sister, never the most stable person, start to have complete breakdowns of sanity once she hits puberty, and helps her cover for it and receive medical treatment on the down low. he’s the heir, but he lives knowing that if he was ever in a position to inherit his choices are to abdicate or have the baby sister who he raised kill him and destroy herself and the country in the process.

when he realizes the plan is to marry azula off rather than someone more reasonable-- mai is RIGHT there, for fucks sake-- he doesn’t realize ozai’s true intent is to fuck this up through malicious compliance and false shows of good faith. he panics, and does the zuko thing: he blurts out that this is unacceptable and immoral and she’s only 16 and Ozai sees the true opportunity for two birds with one stone. send zuko, let him piss someone off so badly he gets killed or divorced, and he gets rid of zuko from the line of succession permanently. there are those who are incredibly attached to teh idea of a firstborn for firelord, and it’s been a constant thorn in unpopular ozai’s side to nto be able to name azula his heir apparent without costly rebellion. but if he can taint him in the mind of the fire nation so much that birthright is easy to supercede-- yeah. this’ll work PERFECTLY.

so zuko is sent to marry hakoda, chief of the water tribe.

literally NO ONE was expecting it to be a member of Ozai’s immediate family. besides the fact that his oldest child is half hakoda’s age and his brother has 20 years on hakoda, it would have been sus as fuck - the treaty is not favorable enough to grant that kind of secession of interests. it becomes quickly apparent that this young man -- hakoda reminds himself of that repeatedly. not kid. not kid. young man. don’t think of him like a kid, it’s hard enough on both of us already. -- is not a horrible threat. he’s scared shitless and shakes with what he thinks is bravado. he’s desperate to make the marriage work. he’s desperate to not go home. he’s got a giant fucking scar on his face from where the fire lord punished him for some grievous but unstated offense.

zuko “daddy issues” fire nation sees his husband to be and, despite being scared shitless, immediately begins to soften a little. like... he’s not nearly as scary as he thought he’d be. his face can be stern, but it just as easily breaks into huge smiles, and his eyes are crinkled with laughter. he’s incredibly handsome. and his biceps are. his biceps. are. his hands are...

like. zuko thinks. okay. maybe. maybe his marriage duties. won’t be so horrible as he thought. maybe he’s ready for this. and he knows what to expect, Uncle had discreetly provided him the means and the contacts to acquire an intimate education in the whirlwind of activity that was the two months before leaving. and like, once he’d gotten past the nerves, it was often even... good? or at least... not bad? he thinks that even if hakoda isn’t a professional expert, he has a certain.... je ne sais quoi, if you will.

((DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF DILF))

sokka sees his new stepfather and immediately falls in love because he’s that kind of dumb bitch. (the core of this au is that i cant breathe thinking about sokka falling in love with his hot young stepmom his age who his dad doesnt even want to fuck. like. i CANT. sokka masturbates to ‘hand caught in the washing tub’ fantasies which are even more absurd for requiring zuko to be DOING LAUNDRY. i find it so funny.)

bato watches them at the wedding feast while hakoda is very clearly trying to treat zuko as an Equal Adult Partner and mostly managing to seem like someone having a serious conversation with a seven year old about the game they’ve made up. zuko is clearly enamored with it, soaking up the attention, blushing and doing his best to Bravely Flirt, which at one point includes awkwardly attempting to feed Hakoda by hand. bato has to excuse himself to have a teary eyed giggle, hoping that Kya is in the spirit world looking down and laughing with him. he can’t resent the kid even a little bit, when hakoda is sitting there looking so incredibly fucking befuddled as to what he’s supposed to do with this star struck infant he’s legally wed to

anyways all of this... is very funny. their wedding night... is less so. zuko does not take the rejection from hakoda very well, especially because he’d been caught wanting. HE’S the one who should be rejecting hakoda. and he catastrophizes almost immediately about his potential value to the water tribe, his future treatment, that endless inescapable freezing cold loneliness is the good ending for him here... hakoda, meanwhile, drops zuko off at his home, reassuringly informs him that there’s NOTHING else expected of him and he will be well taken care of, and books it to bato’s. bato refuses to let him in on grounds of ‘you can’t sleep under the same shelter as me on your wedding night to that kid, have a fucking brain’, and he ends up crashing at sokka’s.

sokka, who had KNOWN that his dad wouldnt, but also upon seeing zuko and zuko’s awkward flirting was like... but how COULDNT he???? sokka is relieved.

the core of this fic is that i find it endlessly hilarious for zuko to try and seduce his husband while sokka simps around zuko and bato tries to be heartbroken or betrayed but mostly ends up with a giant case of hysterical schadenfreude. but the thing that CLINCHED it for me, like THE scene. several years after being married, settled into their life. they’re partners and they see each other as people. and zuko just fucking snaps one night

he just kisses him, desperate and clawing and climbing and maybe a little drunk. he knows hakoda is going to push him away, maybe even hit him, but he doesn’t care anymore, he doesn’t care. he can do anything he wants to him as long as he just-- finally does something. zuko is 21 and married to the surface of the sun and the surface of the sun jr is his best friend and clearly in love with him-- so clearly not even zuko can miss it-- and like. listen. listen. zuko is not a patient person. but he’s been patient for this. he waited and he matured and he is a fucking amazing husband and he wants this, he wants him. he wants to be wanted.

but hakoda doesn’t push him away. hakoda doesnt yell at him, or hit him. hakoda gentles the kiss into something soft and closed lipped. he pulls away slowly, and his eyes are so sad for zuko, so pitying. he strokes his cheek with the back of his hand so gently. he says, I’m sorry. I don’t want you.

and zuko daddy issues fire nation swallows

and he nods

and he leaves, even though its his own fucking house

and he knows he’s never going to be good enough

like FUUUCK i am OBSESSED WITH THAT

[juviaafullbuster]

Hi!!! Can I make a request? Please do Angst number 7, or 8, or 15 :) hahahha! Thank you in advance :)

Thank you so much for your request! I'm sorry it took me so long, please forgive me! Also I couldn't decide on a number so I tried to combine them all.. Really hope you like it 💙

Angst Prompt 7, 8 and 15:

"Do you even still love me?"

"Nobodys seen you in days"

"I told you not to fall in love with me."

It wasn't supposed to go like this. Really, Gray made sure nothing could go wrong. Or else he wouldn't have agreed to her coming along so easily. And yet here they were. Despite all his precautions, he found himself in the very situation he so badly wanted to avoid.

He had called her name before the bolt of magic coming her way would hit her. Juvia managed to get out of the way just in time to dodge the attack and counter it with one of her own. That didn't stop the panic rising in Gray though. No matter how many enemies they took down, he couldn't shake the feeling away that something bad was about to happen.

Looking around, he found all of his friends fighting around him. Lucy was summoning another spirit, Erza just changed her armor and Natsu was using his flames to make the enemy retreat. But to no avail. No matter how many they defeated, it seemed there were always more coming.

He was getting close to breaking down. It was all going so well earlier. They found what they were looking for, had lunch together, Juvia tried to feed him once again. It was going great actually. They were just making their way back, ready to receive their payment, when they had to be attacked.

Gray didn't know who it was that was attacking them nor why, he only knew that if they didn't manage to finish them off soon, this could turn out badly for him and his friends.

"Gray!"

He heard someone call his name, felt someone shove him out of the way, he felt the attack barely missing him. And then he heard screams.

Gray was frozen to his spot, everything a blur around him. He heard names being called. His, Juvias, Wendy's..  so many names. And then he turned around.

Blue hair. Pale skin. Red hands. Red. Blood. So much blood.

It all hit him at once. The realization, the anger, the pain. So much pain. He could feel the air freezing around him. It was getting dangerously cold, a sheet of ice covering the grass, the plants, anything in his perimeter. But he couldn't feel it. Not the ice. Not the cold. It didn't affect him. There was only pain and anger, so much of it.

Gray saw the black marks rising on his arm. And then the anger won over. He lost his ability to think straight, the ability to focus on anyone else beside the guy who had attacked her. He let his powers take control and lashed out.

When he came back to his senses, the enemy was defeated. He watched his marks vanish, alongside the anger. And when they were gone, there was only one thing left: Pain. So much pain.

Gray turned her way, unable to breath. She was still there, in the same spot as earlier. Wendy was leaning over her, focusing on the wound that just wouldn't stop bleeding. He could see so much of it, the blood. He felt a tear rolling down before realization hit him. Practically running, he got to her side and dropped down next to her.

He took her hand. It was so small compared to his. And so cold. Hands weren't supposed to be this cold. Maybe his, but not hers.

Gray looked over to Wendy desperately. She was too focused on her task to realize though. Gray followed her line of sight, focusing his attention on the wound below her chest. So close to her old one. Another one that he was to blame for.

Gray looked at her face. If you ignored the blood around her, she would look like a peacefully sleeping angel. But she wasn't sleeping. Instead she was fighting for her life.

She was still alive. Unconscious, but alive. Gray could see her chest rising, indicating that she was breathing. There was still hope. Gray watched her closely, desperately waiting for any sign. Any sign that this was a bad dream. He saw Wendy sitting back and removing her hands from the wound.

And when he looked back at Juvia, he saw her eyes open, full with fear and frantically searching for something. When they rested on him, she visibly relaxed.

They just looked at each other, both unable to form words. She took her hand out of his, instead putting it on his cheek and wiping the tears away that escaped his eyes.

"It's okay.." she barely whispered, yet he could hear her clearly.

"It's not."

"Gray.."

"No. No, don't. Why? Why would you.."

She looked at him, a faint of a smile on her face. Despite the pain she was currently feeling, her eyes softened.

"Because I love you."

Don't.  Please don't. Everyone who loves me dies. Why don't you learn? Why don't you run away from me? Why do you keep staying by my side? Why? Gray had so many things running through his head, so much he wanted to tell her, ask her. Instead he only managed to choke out one sentence.

"I told you not to fall in love with me."

***

Several days had passed since that day. Gray was desperately trying to avoid everyone. Especially a certain water mage that has been running through his mind. She has been haunting him, his dreams, nightmares. No matter what and where, she was always there.

He had made sure that she was okay, that the wound had healed properly. But once he was sure that she would be fine, he left, taking mission after mission. Just as long as he wasn't around, as long as he didn't have to see her. He couldnt deny that it hurt him. He missed her, her smile, her hugs. But it was for the best. He couldn't let this happen again, her sacrificing herself in order to protect him. And he knew she'd do it again. So he made a decision. A decision that would hurt the both of them. But it was necessary. He wanted to protect her and that was the only way he could.

Gray made his way to the guild hall. It was time to talk to her. He couldn't postpone it anymore because he was afraid he'd never go through with it. The moment he entered the hall he could feel so many eyes on him. But he ignored it and walk straight towards the table where he saw Juvia. She had immediately caught his eye.

When he arrived at said table he took a deep breath, bracing himself for what was coming.

"Graysama! Nobody's seen you in days! Juvia was so worried."

She hugged him, resting her cheek on his chest.

"Juvia came to check up on you. But Mirajane told her that you left on missions. How did it go? Why didn't you tell anyone, Juvia would have come along."

Of course she would have. Wasn't that the problem? How willing she was to do things for him? He hold her by her arms, slowly pushing her away.

"We need to talk."

Juvias smile immediately vanished. Instead her eyes filled with worry.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?"

He could still feel so many eyes on him.

"Not here. Let's go."

He walked towards the door and glanced back to make sure Juvia was following. He lead her to the park and sat on one of the empty benches.

"So what is it you need to tell Juvia?"

"How's your injury?"

"It's fine, Wendy healed Juvia very good."

"I'm glad."

"Is that what you want to talk to Juvia about?"

"Yeah, kind of.."

Gray paused, not sure how to open up the topic he wanted to get to. But it turned out he didn't have to because Juvia spoke up instead.

"You've been blaming yourself again, haven't you?"

She knew him so well. Too well. Somehow Gray felt like she knew exactly why they were here, what he was planning to do.

"That's why you weren't at the guild hall those past days. You didn't want to face Juvia."

"I-"

"Graysama, this was a decision Juvia made herself. And she would have done it for the others too. Whether it was you, Lucy, Erza. Anyone. Because that's what Juvia does for the people she loves. And nothing you will say is going to change that."

"But-"

"No. Juvia doesn't want to hear it."

"You don't even know what I want to say!"

"You want to push Juvia away!"

Silence. She was looking at him, daring him to deny it. There were hints of anger on her face but she seemed to be holding back. Gray let out a frustrated groan. This woman was going to be the end of him.

"Juvia. I'm trying to protect you."

"By pushing Juvia away? How is this supposed to protect Juvia?"

"You won't get hurt because of me!"

"You'd be the one hurting me!"

Another silence. Juvia took a deep breath.

"Listen.. Juvia understands what you're thinking. Why you want this. But it isn't fair. It isn't fair that you let your fears rule over. You told Juvia to be patient, to wait for you. And Juvia is willing to do that. But not if this is what she's awaiting."

Gray gulped. Unable to form an answer. Of course this isn't what he made her wait for. But it was what was necessary. He couldn't risk her getting hurt or worse dying for him. So what if she had to deal with heartbreak for a while, wasn't that better than her being gone forever?

"Juvia will leave. Juvia will not bother you anymore. She won't join you on missions. She won't address you with sama anymore, won't make you food, pick up your clothes. She will try to not love you anymore. It all depends on the answer you'll give her to her question. Juvia won't doubt your answer, she'll accept it, no matter what the answer is."

Gray hated this. Just imagine life like that hurt him. But isn't that what he wanted? Isn't that what was necessary to protect her from him? He was aware that it would hurt the both of them if he went through with it. Wasn't that a risk he was so willing to take?

"What's your question?"

"Do you even love me?"

She was looking at him and she seemed so vulnerable. Gray looked away. He knew what he was about to say would hurt her and he didn't have the strength to see her breaking. He was a coward.

He knew the answer to her question. It took him a lot of time to figure it out, to realize what it was he was feeling everytime he was around her. Turns out the feeling was love. Because yes, he loves her, Gray Fullbuster loves Juvia Lockser, he loves her more than anything. She's his power to live, the one person who makes him smile, the one who keeps him sane. She's his everything. But he couldn't tell her that. Because then she would never let him go. And he was afraid he wouldn't let her either. He had to do it now before he became to weak to go through with it, before she managed to break down his walls completely.

"Not in the way you want me to."

Gray still didn't look at her. He couldn't. He had already heard the sharp intake of breath. There was an awkward moment filled with silence before Juvia finally decided to speak up.

"Juvia understands."

She got up and Gray made the mistake of looking at her. She looked so pained, so hurt and her eyes were filled with tears that where going to be shed any moment now. Gray already regretted his answer, but it was too late now. The damage was done.

"Juvia won't bother you anymore. Goodbye, Graysa- Gray. Goodbye Gray.."

She walked away, not bothering to wait for an answer. She didn't look back, not once. She wouldn't turn around, after all she had promised him. And that was good because it was what he wanted, wasn't it?

Gray watched her form disappear before it hit him that it was over. All of it. Juvia would never be the same towards him again. They would never be together. They were just guild mates now, nothing more, nothing less. Gray should be happy. But why did it hurt so much? Why did it feel like Juvia had taken his heart with her?

He felt something hit his face, followed by more. Rain drops. It was raining. He could tell that it was his doing, he was the one who brought the rain back. And somehow this was what made it final.

Gray stayed on the bench and let the rain mix with his tears. This pain, it was worse then any injury he had dealt with before. And unlike an injury, this one couldn't be healed..

It was over. He had lost her. And he wouldn't get her back.

[finnwolfhardsbae]

✿𝕀 𝕞𝕖𝕒𝕟 𝕀 𝕃𝕀𝕂𝔼 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕪𝕠𝕦✿║A Steve Harrington x Reader imagine (Requested)

𝕄𝕪 𝕗𝕚𝕣𝕤𝕥 𝕣𝕖𝕢𝕦𝕖𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕕 𝕚𝕞𝕒𝕘𝕚𝕟𝕖 𝕀 𝕙𝕠𝕡𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕪'𝕒𝕝𝕝 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕚𝕥 :)

ℕ𝕠𝕥𝕖 𝕥𝕠 𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕤𝕠𝕟 𝕣𝕖𝕢𝕦𝕖𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕕: 𝕀 𝕙𝕠𝕡𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝕨𝕒𝕤 𝕨𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕨𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝕚𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕟𝕕𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕠 𝕘𝕖𝕥? 𝕀𝕗 𝕟𝕠𝕥 𝕡𝕝𝕖𝕒𝕤𝕖 𝔻𝕄 𝕞𝕖 𝕥𝕠 𝕤𝕖𝕖 𝕚𝕗 𝕀 𝕔𝕒𝕟 𝕗𝕚𝕩 𝕚𝕥 <𝟛

𝕎𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤: 𝔸𝕟𝕘𝕤𝕥, 𝕗𝕝𝕦𝕗𝕗 (𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕒)

𝕎𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥: 𝟙𝟝𝟠𝟞 (𝕤𝕠 𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕒 𝕝𝕠𝕟𝕘-𝕚𝕤𝕙)

You’re studying by yourself in the library stressed as hell over this biology essay that was due in 2 days, you aren't that behind y/n just calm down, you told yourself. But if you were being honest with yourself you were very behind, you shook your head trying to get yourself to focus. 

You look up and do a double take because you spotted the most popular and gorgeous guy at your school, Steve Harrington. He was standing at one of the bookshelves reading a book. You and Steve are good friends, though you sometimes thought he could be a douchebag he was overall nice, and kinda cute in your opinion. You look back down at your work trying to focus again, you really had to finish this essay and you didn't need boys or anyone shaking your grade streak right now. 

You’ve always been bothered with school, your fathers a lawyer so you try to live up to your well known family's expectations being the only child your parents have ever had. You think of how disappointed your parents would be if you didn't do well in school, you thought of your parents disowning you because you would be such a failure, a disappointment, a shame to your family. This was always a thought with you, being disowned, thrown onto the street or in an orphanage is your worst nightmare, even though you were 17 turning 18, it still bothers you.

You feel your eyes starting to water and your chest tightening, you could just feel all the stress building up inside you and you needed to let it out, but you couldn't. You were trying to hold it back as best you can the dark thoughts and feelings quickly manifesting in your head. Steve was still at the book shelf and you didn't want to make a fool of yourself, and plus there were other people around you trying to read or study, so you kept it in. 

“Y/n hey are you okay?” you hear someone approach you that's when you looked up and you were met with none other than Steve. You shook your head at him and that's when you let it all out, the tears sobbing the pain, the everything. Having people feel sorry for you was also one of the worst feelings ever for you, you always felt bad that they would worry about you rather than thinking or doing something else, like you were taking up their time. 

You hear a chair being pulled up next to you and feel a hand come around your shoulders, “Hey y/n its okay, tell me what's up hmm?” Steve says in a comforting soft tone, causing you to calm down a little bit. You see a few people staring at you two so Steve takes your hand and leads you out into the hallway so you two could talk in private. 

“Y/n you don't have to say it if you don't want to, I understand, but I just want to help okay?” he says before sitting at a bench with you following. 

“No Steve its f-fine I just feel emotional right now” you say wiping a tear from your cheek, “Well how can I help?” he asked with his eyes full of concern and tenderness making you feel more calmer, more confident. 

You tell him everything from the essay, your family, the stress you feel everyday and how it's affecting you. You were letting him into the most sensitive part of your life, but you trusted him you knew you could. 

He listened to you so intently and with interest and concern. When you finish he just stares at you, “I didn't know you were going through so much y/n” he says quietly. 

You frown, “Hey there are people out there far worse than me, people without jobs, without parents far worse. At least I got you aye?” you nudge him making him smile. “I guess you’re right, but you're too young to deal with that kind of stress,” he turns to face you properly, “Promise next time this happens come straight to me okay? I don't care if it's 2am or pouring rain outside, give me a call or come out and find me. I don't want you to get hurt anymore okay?” you look down at your hands avoiding eye contact with him. 

He uses his thumb and forefinger to pull your chin up towards him, “Promise?” he questions, you blink up at him, “Steve why are you doing this?” you ask him. To this he answers “Because I care about you, you’re one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met.” 

You finally give in, “Okay I promise I’ll contact you next time this happens, there happy?” you giggle as he nods his head, “Yeah okay cool” he then looks relieved and happy. You two sit in comfortable silence for a bit, he catches your eye and says, “Do you want a ride home?”, “Yeah sure thanks I’ll just go grab my stuff and meet you in the car park yeah?” you reply, he nods his head before getting up and leaving. 

You quickly grab your stuff from the library and rush out the doors, getting into Steve’s car you notice how clean it is. “Nice car harrington” you remark before he pulls out of the car park, he chuckles “thanks” as he turns on the radio for some music. 

Later on that evening, long after Steve dropped you off, you start thinking about the whole situation that happened earlier in your head. ‘What does he even mean? He cares about me? And I’m one the most “amazing” people he's ever met?’

You shrug it off he was probably playing you like he did all those other girls, no one would even take a second look at you. You ignore it before you have another panic attack and start reading before you fall into a comfortable sleep. 

The next day you felt slightly on edge, anyone that talked to you that morning you just shut them out no matter who they were, especially Steve.

“Hey y/n, how are you feeling today?” Steve says as he walks up to your locker, “Fine thanks” you answer moodily. Steve gives you a funny look, but chooses to ignore your apparent bad mood.

Throughout the whole day you felt that feeling you had yesterday slowly come back in, you didn't have a particular reason why, but maybe it was because your Biology teacher came over and started talking to you about the essay, or maybe it was because of Steve, or maybe it was your parents.

Whatever reason it was, it sure was giving you hell that day, you avoid Steve for the rest of the day too, leaving classes before everyone else, taking the long way to classes he was in about almost every class you took, and at lunchtime that day you sat in the library and study rather than meet up with friends at the cafeteria. 

Steve knew there was something wrong so he left the cafeteria to look for you, he found you once again in the library. 

“Y/n what's wrong?” he asks as he sits on the ground next to you, “There's nothing wrong Steve I just… I don't even know anymore” you close the book you were reading and start packing up, “I have to go Steve I’m sorry-”, you were cut off by Steve blocking your path. 

“Y/n please talk to me, just like you did yesterday please” he begs looking down at you, you look down at the ground not because you were scared or about to cry, but because you got all shy and was blushing because he was standing so close to you that you could smell the cologne he uses. 

You two walk out into the hall and face each other, ‘Just say what you feel y/n’, you take a deep breath. 

“Steve I was thinking last night and what you said yesterday didnt make any sense at all, well to me it didn't” you stand there staring at him expectantly. He smiles and runs his hands through his mess of hair, ‘god don't do that’, you blink trying to stop yourself from thinking that way about Steve because it was weird. Right?

“Y/n I’ve kind of been wanting to tell you for ages but, I like you” he shrugs as he finishes his sentence, “Well yeah obviously or else we wouldn't be here” you say slightly confused. 

“No y/n I mean I LIKE like you” he looks at you waiting for a reaction, 

“Are you serious Harrington? Out of all the girls at this school that's hotter than me you like ME?!” you were in shock but at the same time you were giddy as hell. 

“Yes, y/n I mean it I mean the whole thing, in fact do you wanna go to the park up the road? You know just for a little date or something.” he chuckles nervously as he waits for your answer. 

You’d always had a crush on Steve for ages, and now he feels the same?! All the feelings you felt before all melted away to nothing, you were ecstatic. 

“Yes of course I would Steve” you giggle as he scoops you up in a hug, for the rest of the day he couldnt get rid of the stupid grin on his face...

[motscore]

hiya totally not self-projecting here but can you do something with bakugou and a s/o who has a really messed up family and home life? and make it very soft and gentle please. its the kind of home where the mom and dad are married but its a very unhealthy relationship. shouting fights are a regular occurrence, and the parents by themselves are assholes to their kid. just to put my situation in perspective, my father has tried slapping/grabbing my ass ‘playfully’ infinitely more times than he’s ever tried genuinely complementing me. he’s done other stuff, but i don’t feel comfortable sharing that. my mother cares more about image, both hers and mine, over people themselves and screams at me over the most stupid stuff. they’re also both conservative, and i’m lgbt, so that obviously isn’t something i can easily share. i’m sorry if this topic isn’t one you feel comfortable writing about, you don’t have to do this request. i just want some escape right now, and hell, someone or something who can at least pretend that they’ll help me, and validate my struggle. tell me it’s real, that i’m real. even though my dad calls me stupid and an idiot for fighting back against my mom, it’s one of the things that reminds me of my reason for treading the water for so long. it reminds me that i didn’t give up, even after all these years, in a way. i pretend and tip-toe around them so much in order to protect who i am. the fact that i don’t cry about it either, makes it seem like i’m just pretending. like i’m not really in a bad situation, but making it bad in my head when really it’s really not a big deal. i’ve gotten very tired because of all this. can katsuki be there to help me? i’m sorry. this was more vent/rant than request. you don’t have to do this one if you don’t want to.

hi love! im sorry i couldnt get this done sooner ive had a busy weekend :( but im genuinely so sorry and upset that you have to deal with this and if you want to dm me to rant im 100% down to listen! i hope this helps you at least a little bit love <3

you show up to katsuki’s door, and jump into his arms and start crying. he catches you of course, trying not to freak out because he doesnt know why you’re crying. he stood in complete shock before speaking up.

“b-baby? whats wrong are you hurt?”

you sniffled before replying

“i- just-“

you couldnt finish your sentence before breaking down into tears again. at this point, bakugou was feeling a swirl of emotions. concerned, sad, upset. he didnt know what was wrong, but he knew you needed him. he walked you two over to his room and laid down, with your head on his chest and your legs interwined.

he rubbed circles on your back, and whispered reassuring things into your ear, giving you time to calm down enough to where you could talk with him and tell him whats wrong.

you sniffled before speaking. you went on and on about how hard things have been for you, how uncomfortable you feel in your own home, how you can no longer tell if its really “that bad” or if you’re just overreacting because you’ve gotten so used to this. how you’ve grown..numb to it all. you told him everything and he listened very keenly. you could tell he was getting upset too, you could feel his mucles tensing up underneath you.

“i am gonna try to not let my anger show right now because thats not what you need, but dont you fucking dare say you’re over reacting. i know that it’ll be hard to convince you that you’re not, but please trust and listen to me angel. everything you’re going through may seem normal to you now but you don’t deserve to be in a situation like this and it is not normal. you can’t even be who you really are because you’re afraid of what the outcome is. thats not normal baby.”

he took a second to readjust you, so he was sitting up against the head board and you’re straddling his lap, facing him. he wiped the drying tears of your face and laced his fingers with yours before continuing.

“all your feelings towards this are valid, 100% valid. you feeling numb is because you’re used to this routine where.. people constantly invalidate you and your feelings. which means you’re gonna let those feelings build up until one day you wont be able to handle it anymore and thats not healthy, angel. you dont deserve to be in this situation angel and ill do everything i can to get you out of there, okay? you know i would love for you to move in with me so i could just... protect you from it all. but please believe me when i say that you’re not overreacting and that what you feel is real, its all real my love. all of it”

he pulled you in for a tight hug, putting his face in the crook of your neck to inhale your light scent. he began to kiss lightly, from your neck sll the way up to your cheeks to your lips, which made you giggle at the sensation.

he felt himself relax at hearing you laugh, and move back enough so he could see your whole face. even with puffy eyes and dried tears on your face, he thought you were the most ethereal being in the universe. nothing would ever change his mind about his precious angel.

he lifted a hand to caress your face, his thumb rubbing soft circles into your cheek.

“ill protect you baby. i promise no one can hurt you here.”

[killthe-illusionarydreams]

Chronic Emptiness

Fred x reader

After the war

Summary: Y/N having a depressive episode & Fred trying to help her through it. Basically me living vicariously through her. Soft moment.

Warning: Mentions of depression & plainly feeling like shit

——————

Y/N was exhausted. Not by her job or work, just mentally drained. This sort of thing happened sometimes. One moment she was okay, the next it all came crashing down on her & she’d feel pure hatred for the world she was living in. Fred had gotten used to it by now, he’d be the ever so caring boyfriend & try to help her through it however he could. Exept he really couldnt do much but reassure Y/N that he was there for her.

And of course Y/N appreciated him & all his efforts, she loved Fred more than life itself & everyone knew that. But sometimes she just needed space. Like today.

They were at a bar with George & Angelina and several other mates after their shifts had all ended from their various occupations. George & Fred at their joke shop, Angelia at the Ministry, Y/N at St Mungos.

Y/N never truly felt like she belonged, not growing up at home, not at Hogwarts, & certainly not in St Mungos where she was working as a nurse. Its not that she hated the job, more like it didn’t particularly cause her immediate joy. She just did it. She got on with it & did what she had to.

As her friends were dancing to the music Y/N leant into her boyfriends ear so he’d hear her say “Hey Fred I think I’m gonna head home early today, I’m tired.”

The man looked up at her, as if trying to read her thoughts “D’you want me to come with love?”

Y/N shook her head, declining the offer “No dont worry. I’ll go through the park, I need some fresh air anyway.” Fred nodded & bid her goodbye with a kiss, telling her to stay safe. “I’ll see you at home.”

It was already dark outside, the tall streetlamps being the main source of light for the woman, but she wasnt really paying attention to where she way going, not caring enough to look. Y/N got to the park near the flat where her & Fred lived, deciding to make a pitstop there she sat on one of the wooden benches that overlooked a small river.

Letting out a heavy sigh she put her head into the palms of her hands, it was feeling all too heavy lately. “Dear Merlin I’m so tired.” Mumbling, the woman rolled her head in her hands before sitting back up and gazing at the sky. Oh how beautiful it looked tonight.

Lighting up a cigarette, she put it to her lips & took a long inhale. She was supposed to be quitting smoking, Fred always got on her about continuing the habbit. In all honesty Y/N didnt care enough to stop, at this point she wasnt even sure if she still got the same boost of seratonin from smoking as she used to. But again, it didnt bother her.

“Fuck me why is life so draining?” She asked no one in particular, she knew why it was draining, the abundance of issues with her brain promptly being the answer. She just wished it were easier. Easier to deal with things.

Realistically Y/N had nothing to be unhappy about anymore, there was no war, she had a good life, an amazing boyfriend, a stable job, decent friends. But there was a permanent void in her heart that could never be filled. Ever since she was a child it stayed with her. Maybe her cold & harsh, unloving parents brought it on, or maybe how she didnt let herself feel love & would distance herself from anyone that ever got close to her. But it was there. Unmovable.

The woman let the smoke out from her mouth, sighing at why she was having another one of her episodes, feeling shitty about having said episode. Yet, there was nothing she could do to stop it from occuring. “Fuck off brain.” She mumbled to herself, cursing her biology & upbringing “Stop feeling so Shit.”

“I keep you alive you ungrateful idiot.” She huffed to herself “And I’m doing a pretty good job, so stop making me feel like its my fault.” It wasnt her fault. If it were, Y/N would know how to fix it & evidently stop feeing this way.

Some would say the war brought this Y/N on, but people knew that she was like this way before. However, before she was better at hiding it. Better at hiding the dark circles, the restlessness, the ‘I dont care what happens to me’ attitude. In all honesty it didnt bother Y/N that people knew she was like this, she didnt do it on purpose. And when she could- she’d be happy- the life of the party, in those instances she could hide her feelings. But sometimes they just got too overwhelming to bare.

“You’re being such a selfish prick.” She sighed and puffed on yet another cigarette “Go home Y/N. Go to the man who loves you.” Yet she made no motion to move. It’d probably been two hours since she left the bar, she wasnt keeping track of time, not feeling the need to.

Sometimes she thought that Fred didnt love her, not because he said something or did something, but because she thought that Fred puts up with her. Which wasn’t true, the man loved her to death, she made him feel alive. Y/N was a risk taker, an adventurer, someone that kept you on your toes- & he admired that about her. Y/N was smart & funny & the most gorgeous person Fred had ever seen, but he knew that behind her sarcasm & faux narcissistic comments, she didnt believe it. Oh what he’d give for the woman to see herself through his eyes.

A few more minutes passed & the woman got up with a sigh, throwing the butt of her cigarette down, she made her way home.

The door creaked open, a little too loudly for Y/N’s taste, she winced at the sound, hoping it wouldnt wake Fred.

“Where were you?” The light flicked on. Before her stood a dischevelled Fred, arms crossed “I got home and you werent here.”

“I was in the park.” She mumbled, taking her coat off “Lost track of time, sorry.”

Fred looked at the woman before him, he noticed the dark circles that she tried to cover prefousley with makeup, noticed the ash on her jacket and faint aroma of smoke mixed with sadness.

“Its fine.” He reassured her and went to hug her, pretending to not notice her cold body & how she stiffened when he touched her “Just let me know next time alright?”

The woman hummed in agreement and walked into the living room, as she sat on the couch she put the tv on to play some sort of muggle program but not really paying attention to it. She just didnt fancy Fred interrogating her about her feelings. She hated talking about them, normally just botteling them up. Maybe that was the cause of her unhappiness.

A few moments went by & she thought Fred had went to bed, but then she felt the couch sink next to her. “Here” he placed a blanket around her & handed her a hot mug of tea “You’re freezing.” Mumbling a thanks she sipped on her drink, not really feeling like talking she waited for him to say something, anything.

And he did “Is it getting bad again?” Oh. Was it? Probably. Most definitely.

“I’m fine.” She lied “I’ll be fine.” Y/N wasnt convincing anyone.

Fred watched her, not knowing what to say or do. He wished he could help, just magically cheer up the love of his life. But thats not how life worked. “You’re good enough.” He blurted out “You deserve to feel happy.”

Y/N didnt look up at him, she knew Fred was trying to help. But was he? I dont know.

“Do I though, do I really?” She finally asked with a sigh, those seemed to be coming from her a lot lately “Because I know I do, I just dont feel it coming to me and its so draining to get on with life when you feel worthless.”

Fred took in what she just said, pausing before trying to come up with a reasonable response “I know.” He sighed “I want to help you Y/N, what can I do?” What could he do though? Realistically?

“I dont know. Nothing. This’ll pass soon enough and I’ll be okay.”

Fred knew that, Y/N was always ‘okay’ or ‘fine’ or ‘just tired’ “But I want you to be better than okay. I want you to be happy, to enjoy life and all its moments.”

Y/N scoffed “And you think I dont want that?” There was a tense silence

“Why dont we take the day off tomorrow and go out somewhere? We havent done that in a while.” Fred suggested. It was true, with both of them being bombarded by work they hardly saw eachother in the last few months.

“Sure.” Y/N smiled sickly and set her tea down “Yeah alright I’ll just sack my job off to have a fun little date with you eh? Why not risk getting fired just because I’m feeling a little moody huh?”

Fred was taken aback by her words and immediately went back on what he said “If you dont want to thats fine I-“

“Im sorry” she cut him off “I’m sorry, that was a dick move I didnt mean it, just everythings gotten so much-“ she put her feet up on the couch to hug them “Im sorry.” A few stray tears fell onto her knees

Fred moved closer to her “Hey, its okay, its okay dont worry. I understand.” Oh sweet understanding Fred, Fred who gave you unconditional love and support. Fred who you keep snapping at.

Moments pass as he embraces you, your body leaning against his heavily. Not sure whether its the exhaustion or something else “I dont deserve you.” You mumble into his chest. He frowns cups your face in his hands, you lean in to his warm touch.

“Dont say that” you let out a quiet sob “Y/N you deserve the absolute world, and I wish I could give it to you & more. If I could take away your pain, I would. In an instant I would. You dont deserve to feel like this, to think like this. But I’m here for you okay. I love you, so fucking much you don’t understand.” He gazed into her eyes, wishing she could feel how much he meant it “You’re the best thing that happened to me & I’m going to prove it to you, whatever it takes Y/N.” He kissed your nose before letting you hug him tighter, relieved that you no longer shrunk away from his touch “Words cant express how much I love you.”

After a few more tears fall, Y/N laughs into his chest “Good because you’re stuck with me.”

Fred grins to himself “I wouldnt have it any other way.”

[platonic-prompts]

Okay, time for your daily dose of wattpad drama

There was a person who dropped a random spoiler into my comment section. It had nothing to do with the book or fandom. It was a random, unprompted spoiler with the name of the show attached to it. So I was like ‘hey, you know that’s a spoiler right”

And they said yes lol

You do realize you just could have spoiled a show I wanted to watch, right?

“What’s the big deal spoilers are inevitable? Several plot points for the shown are all over articles---” Etc

Anyway, this went on for a while, since I was trying to convince them it was a crappy thing to do, since I have my comments on so I can reply to questions about the story. If they had said, oh, sorry, that would’ve been the end of it. 

But no, no, that couldnt be the end of it. Time went on, and they twisted my words “Go ahead, call me an asshole to my face. I dont care”

Even though I never once called them that, instead referring to a kid I went to school with who spoiled endgame because he’s an asshole. More comments, and more of them acting like they’re not at fault, that people ‘don’t mind spoilers because they enjoy the shows more’ and ‘i didn’t know you watch the show’

I don’t but I was planning to and you spoiled a big plot point.

Anyway, time skip to this morning because I muted them and deleted the comments last night so I wouldn’t have to deal with them anymore. Now this is where the drama comes in. This person has a habit of, if they mute me i make a post about it.

Samples include: This person just came at me all posh and whatever cause I called their portrayal of Zoë Nightshade OOC. She was also OOC for no reason whatsoever. I get it if she's like that because of some background story or smt but not without reason. It just seems like a bad writer to me and they're just coming up with excuses.

So…aparrently I offended someone because of something petty. This Wattpad user muted me cause I did something they didn't like (pretty sure they're a 'she' cause her profile description said 'lesbian' but I'm not assuming). I was reading one of their books and saw something interesting that wasn't canon. Something about demigods having golden specks in their blood. I was confused and curious. So naturally, I asked a question. Then this user who took people questioning them to a whole new level, muted me! (In referral to a person who has stated that they don’t like it when people do so and to please refrain from doing so)

And there’s also another one, but they drop the username of a twelve year old because they muted them for calling what they do annoying. But I’m not showing that one because again, child.

How does this factor in? Well, my dear dear children

Lmao this person petty af. They muted me after I ACCIDENTALLY spoiled something that I didn't even consider as a spoiler since the fanfic was unrelated to what I was talking about. I felt no need to apologise because of this and they acting to serious like I've commited a crime. Just get over it. There are worse problems to deal with than spoilers. Why so triggered?

I was replying back with no emotion whatsoever. It's hilarious at how angry they are and how long their comments were. I didn't even bother reading them.

Let’s break this down piece by piece. It is not an accidental spoiler when you drop a major plot point into an unrelated piece of media along with the name of what its from. They admitted that they put the name in there because people might not understand it, but the people who wouldn’t understand it would be people who haven’t seen the show or aren’t up to that part yet. 

The equivalent to this would be going to a random BnHA fanfic on Ao3 and saying *SPOILER FOR THE BARTIMEUS TRILOGY* I just finished reading Bartimaus being forced out of Nathaniel’s mind so he wouldn’t die too, In Ptolomy’s Gate! and then the (girl’s name) summons him at the end and it was so sad. 

*SPOILER OVER*

Even if it was an accidental spoiler, which  highly highly doubt considering they showed no surprise at it being a spoiler and literally said yes lol, it’s still a crappy thing to do. 

Next point: IT”S STILL A SPOILER EVEN IF ITS NOT RELATED TO THE FANFIC

Next: No need to apologize. Really? I straight up said I was planning to watch the the show and that I had avoided spoilers for years so I could watch it blind. And then they proceed to say ‘I didn’t know you watched the show” which again, i have not and now never will because my enjoyment of closely serialized shows hinges on not knowing what happens next. Soap operas are boring for me, and downright cringe worthy because they repeat the same plot points again and again. But then when they throw in a new plot (Or victor decides to be a good grandparent) I find myself enjoying it. Only for that to be yanked away if someone were to say, oh yeah x goes to jail for murder and then y breaks them out and they go live on an island somewhere. 

Also their reason for not apologizing is because people are still mad at you afterwards, also that it doesn’t change anything, but I share that so first part only. People are no obligated to forgive you just because you apologize. Sorry doesn’t wipe away their emotions and free will. Even if you don’t mean it sorry shows that you recognize you did something wrong. (Although I fall into a pit where my sincere apologies seem insincere which is not fun for me)

Next: As for why I kept replying to them. Because they were acting like they did nothing wrong and pushed the blame onto me. I wasn’t acting like it was a crime, I was saying it was a crappy thing to do and maybe dont do it because you can ruin a piece of media for something. But oh no, now I’m triggered I guess. I guess having concern for other peoples enjoyment is a crime now, take me away officer.

Next point: So, if they didn’t bother reading my comments, how did they know I was ‘angry’ Oh, I know. Because they assumed I was getting upset after they shoved words in my mouth. I don’t really get angry. Upset, sure, but not really angry. And even better? Those long comments? less than 1000 characters. Characters, not words. Just because I’m trying to point out that they did something crappy, I’m an angry person. Also???? Replying with no emotion. No they weren’t. I get that tone doesn’t translate in text, but by god they were one of the most combatant and defensive people I’ve seen on wattpad.

Since I can’t see the activity that led to the other things on their message board i can’t say what happened there, but based off of my own experience with them, I’m assuming they’ve twisted the narrative to suit their own needs. Which by the way, can be insanely damaging

I’ve had enough interaction on my account with people, and enough A/Ns for people to get the general vibe i give off, so this probably won’t be much of a problem for me. But if they had dropped my username and I had like 10 followers? It’s a lot easier to trash a reputation than it is to build on. “Oh hey, I like a book by this person” “that persons a jerk didn’t you see that one post” 

People fall into a false sense of security that wattpad is sunshine and rainbows because its mostly young teens on it, but there are plenty of jerks who will twist your words and reactions to fit their needs.

Sorry for the long post, but I can’t reply to the message on their message board unless I want to implicate myself with either of my accounts. So you get this because otherwise my side of things is unknown to the world.

[highstwildflower]

Preference: You are bisexual

Hi, happy pride to everyone! If you aren't a part of the LGBTQ+ remember to be an Ally!🏳️‍⚧️⚧🏳️‍🌈

Word count: 2.4 K

Authors note: Hi this is my first work, please be nice :) 

Calum: The first time Calum laid eyes on you, were at a bar. You were chatting with another girl. You tried to make a move on her, but the feeling that someone was staring at you kept you from going for it. As you had glared around the room, your eyes burned into the intense brown eyes of Cals. And just like that the girl at the bar had been forgotten. You only had your eyes on him. That night had turned into many nights out where you two would end up in bed together, occasionally you would invite another girl home with the two of you. It started to daunt on you that the sweet kiwi might just be using you. I mean a bisexual girl who are willing to do anything he propose. And there you were left with a bad taste in your mouth as you had hopelessly fallen in love with him. 24 hours later when he had called you to ask if you were game, you had rejected him. Sitting in your pjs on the couch the loud noise of the bell had broken you from your thoughts. Tripping to the door you opened it to see no other than Calum. Confusion was written across your face as he slipped passed your body and entered your apartment "be my guest Calum" you snarked at him. He looked rough, his hair was a mess and his eyes were red. His strong hands went through his hair a couple of times before he spoke " Did I do anything wrong?" His ability to sense that something was off came as a surprise to you. You had always thought that he was kinda oblivious, as if he just lived in his own beautiful world. "Uhm no cal, I just wasn't up for it tonight. I kinda wanted some me-time" the look on his face told you that he didn't buy that. You were a social butterfly, feeding of off the energy from others. He knew you better than you were aware. "Yeah I don't think that's the real reason y/n" the room felt silent as you stared at each other, just like you did months ago across the bar. Just two strangers crossing paths, maybe having an impact upon the strangers life. You lack of response caused Calum to speak again "correct me if I am wrong y/n. But you don't like me? I mean I like you, I really do. So therefore I think you should love who ever you wanna love, it is your life. And it's fair if you don't want to see me anymore, I still wanna be your friend at least" you chocked on the air as his words were registered in your brain "you are so fucking wrong Calum, it's infuriating how wrong you are" you paused for a second to catch your breath. "I like you. But you use me to live out your fantasies, and I won't do that to myself" his eyes scanned your body before stepping closer to crash his lips to yours. Your lips moved perfectly together, as you melted in the needy kiss, you almost forgot about feeling used. As those thoughts came to mind once again you broke the kiss and stepped away. Calum looked at you confused for a second before speaking up "'m sorry I just heard that you liked me and I felt as if I might die if I didn't kiss you" he smiled sheepishly at you before continuing " I don't use you, I know that you are into both gender and I didn't want to hold you back. I want you to feel as if you can be authentic to yourself " his sweet and loving eyes never left yours as he confessed that he really was just having trouble with how to navigate with your sexuality. At that moment you realize that it was hard to be the person who wanted everybody else to be happy while trying to figure everything out.

Michael: you and Michael had been dating for a few years. Your relationship was steady, the fights were few and far in between and the love was sweet. You had just arrived home after a long day, expecting Michael to be playing his games you wandered to his room. The computer was turned off and no Michael was in sight. You shrugged your shoulders and wandered around the house to find your man. After looking for a few minutes you were confused as to where he could be "Mikey??" You yelled out. The empty house offered you nothing but silence. Picking up your phone you dialed his number, it rang a couple of times but he didn't pick up. Confusion began to be replaced with worries, where could he possible be. Not wanting to be clingy you send him a text "Hi baby, where are you at? I just got home. Love you XX" the text was delivered, slowly the hours went by without any response from Michael. You grew the courage to call Ashton "hi y/n, to what do I own the pleasure?" You gulped a few times before dragging Ashton into your relationship "uhm I'm just calling because I can't find Michael, I mean he was supposed to be home but he isn't and he doesn't answer me" your voice was strange as you tried not to panic "uhm I think he went home with Luke to have a drink and just hang out. I can check up on him for you?" A sight of relief left you lips "yes please. Thank you Ash" a soft smile had fallen upon your features as you said your goodbyes. Time dragged by slowly but not to long after Ashton texted you back "yup he is pissed drunk at Luke's house, Luke asked if you could pick him up x" you smiled widely at the screen as you left your house. After the short ride you arrived at Luke's house, knocking on the door you waited patiently before the door was opened revealing a very tired Luke who looked relieved to see you "y/n" he breathed out as he brought you in for a hug, he led you to Michael who was sitting in the yard a beer in his hand "hi micky" you smiled at your love but he winched as he saw you "no not y/n, why did you bringer her here?" His question was towards Luke, as you stood taken back by his words you tried to regain your strength. Luke looked at you as a deer caught in headlights. "Uhm Luke could we have a minute?" The blonde guy happily obliged and walked back inside. "What's up Michael?" He looked at you with with a face you couldnt really place, somewhere between anger and pain. "You lied to me" you were confused by his statement as your went over everything you had said to him. The reason for his sudden outburst remained unknown to you. "What did I lie about?" Like daggers he shot his words at you "you never told me that you dated girls before me" and just like that realization feel upon you, your features softened as you approach him. "It didn't seem that important Micky. I thought the only important thing was that I love you? And not who I dated in the past" you were very comfortable with your own sexuality, Michael however only knew you as a strong and proud ally and not as a part of LGBTQ+ you never really thought of the information as something important but you understood why it would be a bit overwhelming to Michael to find out all this time after. "But you felt as if you had to hid a part of yourself from me. The other boys knew, they told me" that was true, Calum had been your friends since forever and he introduced you to your first girlfriend. But you never though if it as hiding a part of yourself from Michael "no baby, I didn't hide anything I just didn't feeling like it was a big deal. But I do understand where you are coming from. So I am super sorry to have hurt your feelings" you looked at him. Hoping to see him come around and you did. He brought an arm around you before pulling you into him. His strong breath tickled the side of your face before his lips caught yours. And your knew everything was going to be all right.

Luke: Being the girlfriend of Luke was quite the job, but you were happy to be by his side. You had seen him develop from being scared to wear chapstick in public to wearing full on glitter eyeshadow. He had had quite the character development. You always felt confident in his present and he made sure to always be the best partner to you. You were his pride and joy. Tonight was no different as you were going to a party at Calum's. You arrived at the party as people began to arrive. Hand in hand you went in. Luke's hand only left yours when he had to grab a drink for the two of you. He returned and not long after a game of "I have never" was started. You were a party animal and loved to drink, games like this was always super enjoyable to you. Luke looked at you as you drank on most of the questions, he loved your wild side. The next question was "I've never dated a person of the same sex" you brought the red cup to your lips before drinking. Luke's eyes burned into you as he pulled you into him. His lips hovered over your ear as he whispered "why didn't you tell me that doll?" you pondered for a bit, you never really thought of it. Your sexuality was not something you had ever voiced, it was really just a part of you. You turned to look at him, his blue eyes looking at you, a small smile on his lips " I never really thought of  it, I'm sorry I didn't mean to hide anything baby" his hand was quickly around your neck as he pulled even closer "never apologize for being you angel. I'm proud of you for being true to yourself" you smiled like an idiot at his words. They brought a strange but lovely feeling of confidence to your body. You moved slightly and left a sweet kiss on his lips. A kiss worth more than a million words. He kissed you again, as he pulled away he had a playful look in his eyes as he whispered to you again "does this mean we can bring another girl into the bedroom?" You smacked his shoulder as you fake gasped. The playful side of your relationship being one of your favorite part. He laughed before adding "No baby, you are everything I could ever want. I love you"

Ashton: Ashton had fallen in love with you in the warm months. The first time he laid eyes on you, you were at a baby shower for Crystal. You had worn a pastel yellow dress with small white flowers, you really had looked like an angel. And you were a literal angel on earth. Very sweet to everyone, helpful, patient and always putting everybody else before yourself. In your spare time you enjoyed reading and other intellectual hobbies. You were the complete opposite of what anyone expected Ashton to fall in love with. But he loved you with all of his heart, you were the cosmos to his chaos. You had a wild side, but that was only for him to see inside your bedroom. However lately he had felt as if you were drawing away from him.  So today he had planned for a nice calm evening where you would have time to catch up. He was nervous that something serious was wrong, normal you would be quick to share your emotions with him but not this time. He was busy making your home cozy for the evening. Across town you were just on your way home from a nice afternoon with your friends. As you sat behind the steering wheel your mind raced. Ash had made you promise to be home all evening, you knew that he knew something was up. This might be the end of you two, you hated the idea of that. As you arrived home you saw the warm light shine from the home you two had made together and your heart broke a little. "Hi ash I'm home" you called out, letting him know you were there and ready "hi baby, did you have a good day?" The awkward small talked continued while your worries grew. He was the first one to break into the uncomfortable topic of what was going on between the two of you "so what's up y/n, and don't say nothing. I know something is up." You looked at him with pure terror "I'm sorry ash, it's just me" you looked at him again, trying to regain your strength. He was now the one to have terror written across his face, it sounded like you were beginning to break up with him. He took your silence as a sign to go on "what ya mean?" He egged you on "I'm having a bit of a hard time Ash. I'm sorry but I've just had this feeling that" you stopped yourself as you failed at suppressing the sobs. He was quickly right beside you, taking you into his embrace, rubbing you shoulders. "Shh it's okay honey, you can tell me" you calmed yourself down before going on "I love you ash, I really do. And it has nothing to do with you. But I think I'm bisexual" you cringed as the words left your mouth, afraid they might break your favorite part of life- you and ash. Ash tightened his grip around you, as he kissed the top of your head "Oh honey. Don't you worry, I love you no matter what your sexuality is. I'm sorry that you hadn't felt safe enough to come to me before love" you pulled slightly away to look if ash was joking around. You had expected him to ask you to leave, instead he was the shoulder you needed him to be. You loved Ash and wanted to be in a relationship with him forever, but you needed to express this side of yourself to Ash. He just accepted you completely for whom you are.