#sorry I'm aro and my girlfriend isn't

[aromanticannibal]

what if ochako is aromantic and that's why everything always feels so wrong and why she isn't sure what she feels for himiko but she knows she wants to be with her and that's why the only thing she can manage to say is how her smile is beautiful and how she'll give her blood for the rest of her life and how she envies her (because she can fall in love and ochako can't and she always feels like soemthings wrong with her)

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

Hello! If you don't mind, this is half a vent and half an ask both to you and to your followers who have had some experience?

I feel like I want certain aspects of a romantic relationship, the idea of having someone "special" is very appealing. Especially since I find myself falling in the trap of romance tropes, and I really do feel that I want to find that one person who I'd feel safe being physically close with, and not just because I turn my brain off to suffer through it but to actually enjoy it.

I know that I'm rather attracted to men, in theory at least, but whenever there's even remotely a thought in my brain that a polite conversation may turn into something more I get nervous, kinda in a bad way. I feel like I want to put a barrier in and I'm afraid they'll be reading into my behaviour too much. It makes me feel as if I like to play pretend in my head but I'm too much of a coward when real life gets involved.

I've been identifying as ace for years now, and I just turned 24. No experience in the dating department, I've been slowly making my way to accepting being at least arospec as well, possibly just aro, but for some reason it's been so much harder for me. Asexuality just clicked. This I think I may be fighting because the idea of a relationship seems too nice to give up and I've already had a bad experience with an extremely undernegotiated QPR (ended quickly but left a bitter taste nevertheless).

I just wish I could not think about it? But I also feel like the societal expectations of romantic attraction are much more pressing than sexual one. I don't want to lead anyone on, and I don't want to feel this little bit of dread whenever I have a conversation with a guy who I know doesn't have a girlfriend. That's another sign of being aro, right? Being able to be comfortable only when the possibility of the other party wanting you romantically is non-existent.

Sorry for this being so long. Thank you for listening, either way.

Romance definitely has a hard to explain quality to it, and I think that can make it questioning if you're aro especially tricky. It is possible that anxiety you're feeling when a situation could turn romantic is a form of repulsion. It's not uncommon for romance repulsion to feel more like anxiety or nervousness, and for people feel like wanting to go and hide. Alloromantic people can be nervous too sometimes, but it usually comes with a feeling of anticipation and still being drawn to the other person. Or they will usually have either trouble with anxiety in other areas, or issues with romance (romance related trauma for example). Sometimes it can be tricky to know exactly what it is, but if the stuff below doesn't sound like you at all, than repulsion is a likely explanation.

The other thing I would point is that fully alloromantic people often have people in real life they are experience a romantic pull towards, who they really want to be in a romantic relationship with. And if you're not experiencing that, that could also be a strong sign of being aromantic.

Being aromantic, and even romance repulsed, if you are, does not mean you can't have a very important person in your life. I know you mentioned a QPR that didn't go well, and it's up to you if that's something you ever want to try again, but even if you don't. remember that deep bonds can come in all forms of relationships. All types of relationships, including friendships, familial relationships, etc. have the potential to be very special of very deep if you end up connecting to someone in the right way. So whatever path you choose to take, don't feel like this isn't possible.

I'll throw this out followers too if anyone wants to share their own thoughts or advice.

All the best, Anon! Good luck!

[destinygoldenstar]

🍀This Is My Fault, Guys...🍀 - Total Drama Viewer Reacts to Disventure Camp Season 2 Episode 10 “Popping Trust”

Hello and hope y'all had a Happy Thanksgiving!

I know I wasn't too big on last episode. I will definitely say I prefer Season 1. But some of y'all told me it gets... interesting from here on out.

And since we're at four episodes left. Maybe.

NO I DON'T HAVE PTSD FROM ANOTHER EPISODE 10 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!

Also, I got informed that Aiden DID in fact apologize to Karol.

If you saw my answer to that ask, I basically said: "Cool. Too bad I had to be told that outside of the show to know that."

It does, you know, tell me that Aiden doesn't apologize on the show at any point.

And hey, IF I'm wrong, I'm wrong, and he at the very least SAYS he apologized to her in a later episode.

But I am going to say this:

I KNOW these greetings exist as Q&As.

For right now, I do not care about these, nor am I watching these.

Any information I SHOULD know about the story and characters should be IN THE SHOW. Whether shown or told. It's gotta be IN THE SHOW.

Because otherwise, I'm convinced the writers are just making excuses.

If it's about any leisure stuff or stuff that isn't relevant to the plot, that's fine. But if you have to give away vital character information that helps me understand them in a supplemental material thing like a greeting, casual viewers like myself WON'T see these and WON'T know these.

That's where I stand with this.

I don't think that person was lying about Aiden apologizing to Karol. I think that was legit. I just wanted to clarify why I responded the way I did.

Good for Aiden for not being the worst though.

(Jake is still my best boy)

The two I'm the most interested in is Rosa and Riya. They have the plotline I care the most about. Especially Riya after last episode.

Is it bad I don't care about the others...?

Maybe not 'don't care' as in 'dislike'. Hunter's okay even if I'm disappointed he wasn't actually aro. (Not a deal breaker) I want to see Aiden not suffer for once. And James... yeah no he can fuck off.

Anyway, that's enough of me babbling, let's get into the episode:

Oh wait are we final five?!

Oh shit I didn't realize that...

Oh.

Oh I hate it.

I have something for cuddling, okay? I see art of a couple cuddling, I am in awe. (I wouldn't say a kink cause I'm asexual, so I don't really feel turned on by things)

So I'm CONFLICTED right now cause I'm torn between "Oh this is so cute" and "Oh I hate it let go of him James"

"It seems like we fell asleep watching the movie."

What movie? Where'd you get a movie screen in the cabin?

"If we hadn't watched that cheesy drama movie, that wouldn't have happened."

"Oh sorry, some of us like art and not just those bloodbaths you call horror movies."

Oho! They're bickering like an old married couple! That MUST mean they're in love!! That must mean they're healthy now!

"Have you seen my phone?"

"I made you watch the movie so you'd fall asleep. Then I stole it. And SMASHED IT. AND BURNED IT. AND THREW IT IN THE LAKE. AND TOOK IT TO THE HOSPITAL WITH KAROL!!"

"Hey man, didn't your mom ever tell you that you shouldn't play with your food?"

Rosa, I don't think that's how you greet people.

"Are you okay, Hunter?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. You just voted off my not girlfriend. That's all."

Idk, I feel like they were so close to making Hunter's story interesting by subverting the plotline a bit. By making him aromantic and struggling to feel the romance the girls feel about him.

But no. It was just a typical love triangle of which girl he wants.

All I'll say is that while I'm not offended by the in paper route they took with this storyline, if I was writing this season and this plotline, I would've had Hunter have a queer crisis and realize he's aromantic, struggle to come out to the girls, and Allyson and Tess bond and find love in each other, bis gotta stick together, and in the end the three accept each other as one happy consensual polycule. Not in the norm of what you expect from a straight relationship, but a found family that satisfies all of them.

"I'm not in the mood to talk right now."

Wow. Don't do Rosa like that. She offered to listen.

"How is the best intern in the world?"

Oh she is desperate to be nice XD

She even feeds him! She's already better than Chris!

"Om."

XD

Okay the way he sounded when he took that bite was not normal XD

Omg the voice acting in this show sometimes XD

I think since I expected it to be bad, I'm not AS bothered by it, except maybe a few lines. Sometimes it's so bad it's funny, you know what I mean?

I mean it's better in Season 1, obviously.

"All this good treatment feels kind of... strange..."

I KNOW. A boss treats their co-workers fairly and kindly?! Who ever heard such a thing?!

I mean I shouldn't talk. Cause in my work place, my bosses actually consider my feelings and make sure I'm doing well!

"But I think if I win, I will invest all the money in my daughter's future."

And that's why I'm routing for Rosa to win. She deserves it.

"I'm here."

Oh geez.

"I HEARD YOU WERE TALKING TO SOMEONE ELSE, HUH AIDEN?!?!? WHAT'S THAT ABOUT?!?!"

Every time, I swear. Aiden CANNOT talk to ANYONE else besides James.

"I was looking for my perfume, but I think I lost it."

Awwww, honey, nooooooo, I'm sorry.

Okay so there's a thief running amuck.

I thought it would be Riya, but if she lost something too, then maybe it's Hunter and he's trying to get the two alliances to turn on each other so he can stay in the game.

Or Riya or James are bluffing.

"Hunter can't win today's challenge."

Yes. Thank you. He's the only guy that's won immunity all merge.

For bullshit reasons very time.

"Wouldn't that be playing dirty?"

Rosa, no. That IS a valid, impersonal, and good game strategy to have.

It's not like we're killing him.

"I know how to differentiate the game from friendship, but that doesn't mean we should play dirty. And the way everyone accepts so easily scares me a little."

Omg Rosa I love you.

I LOVE how genuine she is compared to everyone else. It's so refreshing.

She's genuine but she's also not stupid, you know?

*Gets a golf ad*

XD

Rosa, you don't want to play the game dirty, go play golf instead!

"Excellent work Oliver..."

XD

"Yaaaaaayyy, that's so great, I LOVE safety..."

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH"

Same, girl.

"James, Aiden, and Riya have agreed to align the challenge for you to be eliminated."

YO WHY ARE YOU TELLING HIM THIS?!

"I understand. I would have done the same if I were Tess and Ally."

Oh, he's cool.

GIRL YOU ARE TOO GOOD FOR THIS WORLD.

"James, I know you're just upset about losing your phone, but we need to focus on finding Hunter."

Yeah James, it's called withdrawal!

If their plan fails because James is too pissed about his phone, that's ANOTHER point against him.

"What if I told you I didn't lose it?"

"What? What are you talking about?"

"I mean I didn't lose it."

XD

I'm sorry XD

I KNOW what he's about to say, but I get this out of context thing in my head.

"You didn't lose it?"

"I didn't lose it."

"What are you trying to say?"

"I didn't lose it."

"I know you didn't lose it. how did you not lose it?"

"I mean I didn't lose it."

"Can you say SOMETHING besides you didn't lose it PLEASE?!?!"

"...pumpkin pie."

Idk.

"That's a very serious and rushed assumption."

Yes it is.

One time in school, I lost a highlighter, and I immediately came to the conclusion someone stole it.

Turns out whoever did it smashed it on the floor so I couldn't find it.

And I got accused of false accusations.

I had an AWFUL school life and EVERYONE HATED ME.

Yes even teachers hated me.

"And who do you think did it?"

"You tell me. Who is the only person in the camp with that background."

😨

NO.

UH UH.

NO.

DON'T YOU DARE.

She has an idol! She can just play it!

OH GOD HE'S FERAL.

"What's wrong with that guy?"

YOU'RE TARGETING HIM, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!

"Your stress levels say otherwise."

Wait, is being nice KILLING her?!

Holy shit, THAT'S why McCleans are sociopaths! Because if they're nice they DIE!

"I felt bad that the four of us were attacking him."

You're too good for this game!

"This is ridiculous. It's like Hunter had prepared beforehand."

Let's be fair.

Even if Rosa DIDN'T tell him, if Hunter had a brain, he'd figure out that the others would be targeting him. So he'd play like this anyway.

"Excellent Rosa! Just like we planned!"

"So when Hunter is distracted, we all attack him at the same time!"

Oh wait that's smart on Riya's part! Holy shit, SLAY QUEEN!!!

"It's just a game. You did what you thought was right for you and it doesn't bother me at all."

Aw that's sweet.

"You warned me of your joint attack even if it hurt your alliance. You're a good person."

Yeah, about that...

ARE YOU SERIOUS YOU GUYS ARE BAD SHOTS

"It's time to hunt down Hunter!"

👏

HEY QUEEN

HEY QUEEN, I AM NOT WORTHY

SLAY!!!!

SLAAAAAAAYYY!!!!!

UH, HE DROWNED.

How do you keep the balloon underwater?

"The camper with the most intact balloons wins."

Oh okay, so don't shoot. Rosa and James have two.

Sorry, Rosa and AIDEN have two, my bad.

I'm not high this time, I swear.

"Let's wait for time to run out, and let Aiden win."

That is a perfect plan.

YOU FUCKING BITCH

YOU MOTHERFUCKING HYPOCRITE

Murder him. Murder him. Murder him.

Don't actually murder him, but slay him! SLAY HIM!

THAT IS THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU JUST SUGGESTED YOU BITCH

SHE IS YOUR ALLY!!

JAMES, I FUCKING HATE YOU!!

"And that was for stealing my phone!"

YOU DON'T KNOW THAT SHE STOLE YOUR PHONE

YOU JUST DECIDED TO ACCUSE HER, WITH YOUR ONLY PROOF BEING "Well she shoplifted before"

I HATE YOU JAMES

If James gets away with this, let alone wins, I fucking hate this season.

Okay maybe that'd be too mean. But I wouldn't like it.

And now you all lose.

Good job.

Good FUCKING JOB.

...wait what?

NO WAIT I KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON

IT'S RIYA, IT'S GOTTA BE RIYA BECAUSE RIYA WAS THE ONLY ONE WITH ROSA THE WHOLE TIME AND COULD SHOVE THAT STUFF IN HER BAG-

SHE SABOTAGED ROSA

OH MY GOD...

DID MY QUEEN SLAY?!??!

DID SHE MISUSE HER SLAY PASS?!?!?

Wait... how many slay passes did I give her again?

No no, I don't care that Hunter won. Big whoopty do. I need to see how many slay passes I gave Riya throughout the season.

THIS IS TOTALLY MORE IMPORTANT

"I... want Yul to go to the Orange team."

YUUUUUUUUUUSSSS

SLAY QUEEN

SLAY QUEEN👑

DUMP HIS ASS ON THE LOSING TEAM AND GET RID OF HIS ASS

Counter: 2

"We can dominate the game together and you can beat the shit out of us in the semi-final."

Oh so you WANT to lose to Riya?

Heyo, don't tempt her to slay, Rosa. SHE'LL DO IT.

"Huh, now that you're encouraging me to slay, I think maybe I should slay, you know? Helps with my broke-ass career. People LOVE IT when people SLAY."

Counter: 5

I'm sorry for the disrespect, Riya! You can slay! This is my way of saying sorry, queen!

I love Rosa and don't want anyone to slay her, but I'm also like "DO IT YOU WON'T. DO IT YOU WON'T."

Counter: 7

"Karol is right. I must not forget my goal. I haven't stopped failing in my work, that's why I came here. This is my last chance to be someone! And I don't want to return to India with my family!"

SLAY GIRL!! SLAY!!

Counter: 9

"So when Hunter is distracted, we all attack him at the same time!"

Oh wait that's smart on Riya's part! Holy shit, SLAY QUEEN!!!

Counter: 10

HEY QUEEN

HEY QUEEN, I AM NOT WORTHY

SLAY!!!!

SLAAAAAAAYYY!!!!!

Counter: 12

I mean, it wasn't as many times as I said 'Steal The Idol'

Which, I'm pretty sure THAT counter is a meme on my Disventure Camp Blogs now...

(Either me or someone should do a counter of how many times I said something along the lines of 'steal the idol' throughout these reaction posts)

BUT STILL.

HOLY SHIT THIS WAS MY FAULT

I MEANT SLAY AS IN FLEX HOW GORGEOUS AND SASSY YOU ARE 💅

I DIDN'T MEAN SLAY AS IN BETRAYAL🔪

I could be babbling about nothing cause they didn't say she did this yet. Then I'm making a lunatic out of myself.

BUT DID I FREAKING CALL IT FROM WHAT, EPISODE 3? (Yes, it was Episode 3)

"You better pack your bags, because you're leaving tonight."

GODDAMMIT BUT I ALSO LOVE ROSA AND DON'T WANT HER TO GO.

I'M SO TORN.

I mean, she has Hunter on her side, right? So if Riya doesn't flip she's fine and they can boot James here.

GEE, IF ONLY ROSA HAD AN IDOL OR SOMETHING THAT COULD NULIFY THE VOTES.

IF ONLY, AM I RIGHT?

Add that to the counter.

UGH HONEY NOOOOOO I DON'T WANT YOU TO GO

I THOUGHT SHE WAS GONNA WIN

WHAT ABOUT HER DAUGHTER?!

"It's about Tess and Ally, they both like me. I think I feel the same way about them too."

HUNTER THEY'RE GONE, I DON'T CARE

I'M CONCERNED FOR ROSA

"If the three of you are happy together, why change it?"

THANK YOU ROSA.

"I don't know, because it's normal, right?"

This man doesn't know what the LGBTQIA+ Community is, I swear.

"Connor said I had to pick one."

Well screw Connor, who cares?

"Maybe it was inappropriate to bother you with my problems."

You and Jake would get along.

And you and me, probably.

But YEAH. I want the focus to be on ROSA.

"I wouldn't worry about that."

"Yeah, unfortunately, I don't have any advantages on me that had the power to negate the votes against me... you know, like an immunity idol or something. It's very unfortunate."

YEAH, SHE'S DYING. SHE'S ACTUALLY DYING FROM GOODNESS.

"If someone has a totem..."

SAY NO MORE!

"Me! I have an immunity totem and I want to use it now!"

LET'S GO!

"It's right... here? What?"

YOU DIDN'T CHECK YOUR POCKETS BEFORE YOU GOT TO TRIBAL?!?!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!?!?

ROSA NOOOO

I WAS SARCASTIC

I WAS BEING SARCASTIC BACK THERE, I THOUGHT SHE ACTUALLY HAD IT

THIS IS MY FAULT, NOOOO

"Did someone steal it from you?"

Of course no one steals idols around here. Because nobody here takes my advice ever.

Also fuck off, James.

'ROSA'

🎵I fucking hate my life and everyone here...🎵

'JAMES'

🎵I hope it's James but I think it won't because🎵

🎵Because these shows fucking hate me...🎵

🎵Why the hell am I singing? I have no idea🎵

'ROSA'

🎵Maybe cause I don't want to listen to this BULLSHIT🎵

🎵Lalalalalala I'm not listening...🎵

'JAMES'

🎵PLEEEEEEEEEEESSEEEE OH BAAAAAAAABBBYYY DON'T GO🎵

🎵SIMPLE AND CLEAN IS THE WAY THAT YOU'RE-🎵

😭

I'm not actually crying, that's just the emoji. Imagine me making a whining roar that sounds like a dying cat.

I THOUGHT ROSA WAS GONNA WIN

I WAS ROUTING FOR YOU

HER DAUGHTER TOO, OH MY GOD

SHE CAME HERE FOR HER DAUGHTER

"I just want to say that I'm leaving with a clear conscience. I played fair, I did the right thing, helped everyone I could, and didn't steal anything!"

Tell em.

GIRL HAD A FOOLPROOF GAME STRAT, AND SHE STILL LOST.

She had a secure locked in alliance. The team swap did not shake her. She got along with everyone to prevent herself as a target. She was a strong player. She was finding idols.

SHE HAD EVERYTHING GOING FOR HER.

AND SHE STILL LOST.

"I don't know what happened, but you have to be careful of James."

I know, right?

"Don't worry, I have a plan to deal with James."

AS SHE SHOULD SLAY.

"Riya, I didn't steal anything."

"I know, Rosa. It was me."

*I got up and paced around*

BITCH WHAT THE FUCK

I KNEW IT!!!! I FUCKING KNEW IT!!!! I CALLED IT!!!!!

I FUCKING CALLED IT!!!!!!

OH MY GOD NOOOOOOO

I WAS RIGHT?!?!??!

Guys, I swear this is blind. I swear. I swear on my oath.

Look. There's NO BAR ON THE FUTURE EPISODES.

THIS IS BLIND. I SWEAR. I DID NOT KNOW.

THIS IS PROOF.

DON'T THROW ACCUSATIONS.

RIIIIIIIIYYYYAAAAAAA

WHY DID YOU SLLAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY?!?!??!

WHY DID YOU LISTEN TO ME?!??!?!??!

I'm torn.

I'm so torn.

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FEEL ABOUT MY BEST GIRL SLAYING MY OTHER BEST GIRL?!?!

Do I side with Riya going forward??? I-I don't know-I feel like I have to! I feel like because it's my fault, I'm OBLIGATED to side with her!!

She has me wrapped around her finger!! I don't know what to do! Because I want to hate her, but I JUST CAN'T!

I don't know what the popular take on Riya is. I only knew what the takes were on Ellie and Jake. I knew people hated Jake. BUT I LOVED HIM. I knew SHIT about the Season 2 cast.

But I NEED to PROCESS THIS...

RIYA I DON'T KNOW IF I LOVE YOU OR I LOVE HATING YOU OR I HATE LOVING YOU, YOU HAVE ME QUESTIONING MY SANITY, GIRL!!!

ARE YOU EVIL?! IS THAT IT?! Or are you just playing the game?

"I stole James' phone and put it in your backpack along with my perfume. I also took your immunity totem."

...

Okay?

Idk what you want me to say. I have nothing to say about that.

"Did you frame me?!"

What do you think she's trying to say? She's coming clean.

"Did you make me look like a thief in front of everyone?"

I mean that SUCKS because Rosa had to steal to survive, so this is some TRAUMA for her.

But also, getting pissed over a PHONE, I think is still on James.

Holy shit I'm defending Riya right now-holy shit I AM stanning her still, oh shit...

Oh no... oh no what has happened to me...?

"I was acting, Rosa. The boys didn't doubt it for a second."

I mean she's right. I can't say that's invalid of a strat.

"Riya, why did you do this to me?"

"We can betray each other inside the game and still be friends outside of it. Just like you betrayed the alliance by spoiling the plan to Hunter."

I... SOUND. Okay. That's sound.

CAUSE HEY, JAMES CAN PUT PEOPLE IN THE HOSPITAL AND CALL IT A STRAT, BUT RIYA CAN'T? LET'S BE REAL NOW.

"These are things that happen in this game."

Yeah. Yes it is.

Don't hate the player, hate the game.

"The problem isn't the game. It's you Riya."

OH SHIT.

"You let the competition change you. You may win the million, but you will be alone again."

OH SHIT...

SO THAT'S WHERE THIS IS GOING...

"Come on Rosa! Don't be mad!"

"Hmph, I am not mad, I am disappointed."

SHIT...

And that's it.

She lost her ONLY friend here.

SHE'S SO UPSET ABOUT IT, OH MY GOD...

"Everything went as planned. When I stole the things, I didn't know whether to blame Hunter or Rosa, but I came up with a plan that could take me far, and unfortunately, I had to sacrifice Rosa."

I mean, I have to give mad respect that she's owning up to it.

"Yeah. I played dirty. Whatcha gonna do about it? I AM A QUEEN AND I HAVE GOLDEN'S SLAYING SUPPORT. I HAVE A RIGHT!"

Oh the goodness killed her. Well, RIP.

Okay, after thinking about it... HOLY SHIT RIYA IS SMART.

Seriously, think about it!

Final FIVE. Hunter KEEPS winning immunity no matter what they try.

Sure, she's allied with James and Aiden as well, BUT if Hunter wins immunity, which is what ended up happening, James and Aiden WON'T turn on each other.

So it'd either be her or Rosa. And since everyone likes Rosa, then Riya would go 5th place if she did nothing.

So her best move was to pin the blame on Rosa and get everyone to turn on her.

And if they find out she did this or Hunter wins immunity again? DOESN'T MATTER. SHE'S GUARANTEED FINALS ANYWAY.

IT'S ACTUALLY SO SMART.

I mean, I HATE this plan because it sacrifices Rosa, WHO DESERVED TO WIN OUT OF ALL THESE GUYS.

BUT

I HAVE to respect the hell out of her.

Oh my god I love Riya... I-guys, I think I might be supporting Riya.

I genuinely want Riya to win this season.

I get she might be evil, but it's Total Drama so who cares look what show you're watching, BUT THAT WOULD BE SO POETIC AND BRILLIANT.

She came here as an outsider outcast with no social life and desperately wanted it. But because of the game and what her career needed to succeed, she had to ditch both that and her morality so she could find success.

SHE WINS AND SHE SLAYS, BUT SHE WON'T BE HAPPY. HER LIFE WILL BE MISERABLE AND AN ENDLESS CYCLE OF ACTING SHE CAN'T BREAK FROM.

I WANT RIYA TO WIN NOW. THAT WOULD BE SUCH A GREAT ENDING. TOTAL DRAMA WOULD NEVER DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

As much as I would LOVE it if Julia had something like that, but you know, Season 2 of the TDI Reboot fell off the deep end at the third act. I KINDA warmed up to it, but I still don't like the last third of that season. (Episodes 1-8 were great though)

I feel like I'm obligated to as well, because I'm the one that kept telling her to slay. So I've been pushing it XD.

But yeah, RIYA SUPPORTER AND I DON'T GIVE A SHIT. THIS WOMAN SHOULD WIN AND THIS WOMAN SHOULD SLAY AND THIS WOMAN SHOULD GET HER UNHAPPY ENDING.

YOU WANT TO WIN THIS GAME, YOU DO IT SWEETIE.

YOU WANT TO DESTROY THESE BOYS, YOU DO IT SWEETIE.

YOU WANT TO BE A COMPLETE PIECE OF SHIT GOING FORWARD, I WILL PROBABLY BE TOO STUBBORN TO HATE YOU.

I'm a damn hypocrite for this, aren't I? How the fuck is James still here?

Also NOOOOO ROSA I'M SORRY

Rosa was so good too... it sucks. It sucks so much. I LOVED Rosa. She deserved to win, too. And I thought she was gonna win.

She was kinda giving me Owen and Wayne energy. Except she was actually a bit strategic with her alliances and finding idols and making good terms with everyone. She would've been a GREAT winner.

AND SHE HAD A SYMPATHETIC MOTIVE TO HELP HER DAUGHTER. LIKE, WHYYYY?!??!

Though let's be real. Riya hurt her personally. Riya could donate the ENTIRETY of the million dollars to Rosa if she wanted, and Rosa STILL would not forgive her or accept her back.

So props for Rosa having a backbone.

Alright, this show got my interest again. I want to see how this plays out. I'm supporting a mastermind, oh my god...

[wuffgang-ameowdeus-moozart]

I think that the complaints about Vickie are less "she is too similar to Robin" (bc girl literally had half a scene of screentime. we have no idea who she is.) and more "once again there are only two (2) explicitly queers in the show (I will always be a Will should've come out to Jonathan truther) so of course they will be forced together".

She was only barely introduced. It feels a lot like the only reason she exists is so Robin can be with someone. The Duffers already have problems dealing with their current (pretty big) cast, it does not bode well for Vickie's characterisation tbh (I'm sorry, I love him as much as the next person. But Argyle's one (1) personality trait is literally. Weed. So it doesn't seem improbable that Vickie's one (1) personality trait would be becoming Robin's girlfriend. Which would suck for obvious reasons. Also, like. They are already infamous for their treatment of queer(-coded) characters)

It would also take away from stobin time, which is an already established dynamic everyone (if you don't you are simply factually incorrect sorry not sorry) loves. The cast is huge, the Duffers will have to pick and choose who they want to focus on, and it seems way more probable that those will be the established mcs (Will & El especially) and not Robin's side-character love interest. I mean, it would honestly be bad storytelling if they did that in the last season.

Especially since the straight romances are so good. Lumax? Absolute banger. The early Stancy development? So good. Jancy? Pretty sure there's a poll out there about how they are one of the most well-liked couples. Mileven? Multiple seasons establishing groundwork before they even get together. To have Vickie not even be a character before she is thrown into a relationship with the only lesbian feels a bit like a slap in the face. Like, at least Steve had a bunch of character development after the breakup but that can't happen with Vickie because it's the last season and they really have other stuff to worry about 😪 Like, idk, at least everyone else had a choice, which is part of what makes those romances so impactful (lumax, jancy, etc etc), while Robin - on the count of being a lesbian and Vickie being the only other sapphic character - really.....doesn't.

(Plus maybe it's the aro in me speaking, but I found it kinda cool to have a canonically queer character whose story arc is not completely focused on romance for once)

I also think this part of the reason why ronance got so big. Nancy already *is* her own person. Nobody can look at Nancy and say "her only personality is being queer" or "she's only here so Robin doesn't end up alone because we obviously need to pair everyone off somehow". A relationship between them would be another facette of their development, not the one thing that defines them. (Like. Her being bi is literally the only reason Vickie is even in the season. Sorry not sorry.)

But I mean. The season isn't out. We barely saw the two interact. My expectations are already below ground level. Maybe they will surprise me.

[growling]

you know i do not think about whether i may or may not be somewhere on the aro spectrum or whatever that often, partially because it's significantly harder to look for something that isn't there as opposed to "would you fuck the male human specimen (yes/no/depends)" do you get what I mean did I say something. But also can somebody explain what the fuck does "romantic attraction" entail. I swear everybody has a different definition. It's like. Where do I even start like I think I would want a relationship or something that'd be poggers can you give me like 2 girlfriends I can keep in my house and let them run around freely and do stuff but like the only requirements would be that you're a close friend beforehand. Like where does the line between friend and partner start aside from like just what I call you. Growing up I always thought romance is just the Advanced Friendship + Fornication permit ig but obviously that's wrong since people frequently marry people they fucking hate and would never hang out willingly unless they were sucking and fucking or discussing who owes eachother more money. Actually hold on how is friendship different from romance exactly can you explain like I'm 5. Describe romantic feeling and how exactly is it different from platonic. How the fuck is a crush/infatuation different from just really liking somebody/their attention and being fixated on them in a pal kinda way like I don't think I'm "in love" with anyone I've ever . Nevermind actually. People say "friends cannot have sex that's immoral and perverse ONLY touch your current one (1) true love or else you're blurring the line between friendship and romance thus leading them or whatever the fuck" and I do NOT get it <3 I would in fact prefer to ONLY fuck my friends (because I actually would know them. lmao) if they're also cool with it as a beloved and cherished bestie bonding activity, for fun, or perhaps even competitively. Recently I fucking realized (took literal ages) that when people say they have a "crush"/are "in love" with a celebrity they never met in their entire life they don't mean they admire them, think they're beautiful or engaging in a bit, they mean they are literally straight up romantically attracted in-love with them what the hell. The information you don't even need to KNOW somebody to want a romantic relationship with them (and I'm not talking sexual I mean just purely romantic. I could mayybe get the sexual one but personally I'd never do that with a tv man. or is that hypocritical of me) fucking changes everything because then that means it's entirely separate from friendship in that you don't have to get to know the guy even I grrrhgghgrrrhhh. I'm literally shaking, Jesse what the fuck are you talking about what do you MEAN what does ANY of this mean. Are you lying to me is everyone just doing this for shits and giggles what the fuck. I wasn't so ffucking feeling strongly about this subject when I started typing this out but now I DEMAND an explanation maybe perhaps a powerpoint presentation up until I deduce what does it mean to be romantically attracted to something I won't be able to debate on whether or not I'm capable of it. Anybody want to count every instance of "romantic" I typed out in this wall of text sorry there is not another word . Damn

[steeltwigz]

I just think the endgame of TV romance being Marriage and fitting into expected moulds kinda ruins it for me. Like characters dating and adopting labels like "boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other" is Fine but it makes them foreign to me bcuz I'm Aro. Obviously at the end of the day I don't care what the writers do becuz this is a very specific problem, but it's why I appreciate the way II is written especially and why all the questions of "IS FANTUBE CANON IS LIGHTBRUSH CANON DOES SILVER HAVE A CRUSH WILL THEY GET MARRIED AND SETTLE DOWN AND HAVE CHILDREN AND RAISE A FAMILY AND BUY A HOUSE IN THE SUBURBS" are so so SO annoying. Becuz I can understand things like mutual respect, like enjoying another person, caring for people. But like. Having a Boyfriend is something that happens in middle school. Like idk not to b rude but it's childish to me, to call someone that lmaoo. It takes me out of the show and I'm instantly put aside from the characters' relationship. And especially with queer characters, I don't like trying to fit them into the typical het relationship! Whatever they had going on before that is always way more interesting. Honestly I enjoy romance when it isn't the very underwhelming and overplayed cishet white American suburbia song and dance. These characters have such interesting dynamics, they don't Need a traditional white wedding to cap it off. Most of them wouldn't even have one imo! Why can't it be enough that they very clearly care abt each other. "It's too ambiguous!" Okay. Would that be so bad? Why do you need everything you want to be explicitly stated for you? Can't you have fun reading between the lines and extrapolating information yourself? And come on. Fantube? Fantube is Too Ambiguous? Most of them aren't, I think you just have piss-poor media literacy. Anyway. Sorry I HATE shipping. How many times do the creators have to say "guys it can't possibly be More Canon, what more do you want from us" before you all Shut Up. If Test Tube said "Fan I Have A Crush On You, Will You Be My Boyfriend" verbatim I think I'd THROW UP. They don't need labels they don't need labels they don't need labels it's way better without labels it's such a clunky and horrible thing to say anyways crushes aren't real after you graduate highschool guys come On

[invisiblegarters]

23.5 Episode 9

Last week: sapphic teachers, Aylin and Luna being adorable and confessing in morse code, kisses!

I dunno man. Eight hours a day could mean that we work two of them. I feel like I could handle that.

I say this every episode, but Sun and Ongsa really are cute.

Latte is still best dog.

I would snatch up the chance to do an exchange program if I were Ongsa. I did not have the opportunity as a teen but man, that would have been so great.

Oh Aylin. I love her. Those awkward smiles i'm dying.

Ongsa absolutely can't ride a bike.

I am so glad that Sun decided to start with a bicycle instead of a scooter.

Okay I know they gotta do their advertising thing so I'm not gonna say a word about the makeup ad. I'm not.

Okay one thing: I do think it's cute that Aylin wants to look cute for Luna. Not that she need the makeup for that, but you know.

Hahaha Sun I love you. I love that she's like "well my girlfriend moves faster than you two, I'm so lucky."

...is that not how it went?

Aw poor Alpha. I bet she feels so out of the loop.

I do love how concerned they all are for her. This show is so damn cute and lovely.

I'm sorry but can they just keep putting Ciize in those sleeveless shirts? Please? For me?

Aw that advice was good.

Okay this looks like an intervention though.

Dammit, Alpha! What did your teachers just tell you? Although to be fair I get her feeling cornered.

Oh my gosh this girl is so cute. Is she making octupi out of the sausages? ADORABLE.

Aw this family stuff is so great.

LOL okay this is hilarious. I think it's great Ongsa isn't going to have more time than one day to prepare. Girl is gonna stress herself into a heart attack if she gets any more time.

Ton is killing me with the second hand embarrassment my god. I am beginning to think that he only wants what he can't have. Or that he deliberately pursues girls that he knows aren't gonna ever take him seriously. I read a theory that he might be ace (or aro, or both) and my goodness I'd love that but I'm trying not to get my hopes up because I still feel like TonCharoen is gonna happen.

Welp that went well. I don't think Ton was being malicious because he's just not that type, but also Aylin just isn't comfortable. I don't think that Luna is in the wrong to want her to open up to her friends a little, but poor Aylin must feel so pushed.

Although a part of me does wonder if part of Aylin's thing is that she does want friends, but she's so used to being treated like shit for just being herself that she's ultimately decided not trying at all is better.

Oh hey this is very sensual for this show. Good for them!

I'm sorry I just got all caught up in my Aylin feelings again. She's hands down my favorite, I feel for her so much.

Next week: MORE NIDA AND BAMBAM. Bambam please get hit with a clue by four before this show is over I am begging you.

[oh-hools]

11, 40

perspective on romance from someone's who's aro, that sounds interesting, also bad habits

sorry if I'm nosy these two just caught my attention

11. what do you consider to be romance?

Romance i guess is a form of intimacy that both parties consider and agree to be romantic. swhat you and who youre with call romance that ultimately is romance. not the hottest take on the gay people website but like. youknowwwwwwww. intimacy can go under a handful of different labels but i think defaulting all Elevated forms quote unquote under romance is lame and not fun. not the hottest take. i ❤️ my girlfriend and i ❤️ the word girlfriend but strictly defining our relationship as romantic (period) weve found isn't the right fit. & were both on the aro spectrum so its been a lot easier to talk about that. but yes just intimacy in any directionLabelForm should be valued forever. not the hottest take. but its real and ive been feeling it.

40. any bad habits?

i m really bad at measuring time. im soorrryyyyyyyy. im trying to get better. it usually isnt a big deal if im late to classes but when i mismeasure time to like hangout w friends i feel guilyyyyyy. but its bound to happen. myaaoww

[faithdeans]

hi, it's ace anon <3

i'm just kind of weird feeling right now because like, i like the idea of romance, i think it's cute, i just don't think it's for me, or if it is, it's gotta be somebody i havent met yet. so that would make me aro or demiromantic, which is cool, and i'm fine with that, i just,

i'm visiting my cousin and his girlfriend of three years and she's so nice and they're so sweet together and i think they're going to get engaged soon based on how my cousin is acting, and it kinda makes me sad to think that i've never met anybody who would ever make me feel like the way they feel with each other. i feel so on the outside and i'm so happy for them, i am, and i'm so excited she's going to be part of our family.

it's just that the way their relationship works and how happy they make each other would never work for me. i realize i'm a different person than them with different boundaries, but looking at them so in love reminds me of how uncomfortable i would be if someone did that to me and also of how awesome love can be, so it's just a sucky feeling.

sorry if this bummed you out, i love you and you really helped me last time, so i'm like praying you have advice for how to not feel sad?

-ace anon

hiiii aceanon!

100% understand how you're feeling rn. when i realised i was aro, i definitely went through a kind of grieving process over it. very much thinking 1) there is something wrong with me and 2) i'm never gonna have that. i don't even think i want that but i'm never gonna have that.

it's like a whole world you can see and have to come to terms with missing out on and it's hard and it's painful. (at least it was for me)

i was actually talking about this yesterday and it's like, i feel like a hopeless romantic still. like i still crave that closeness and honestly some relationshipy things but. it's not romantic for me. it's more like a bond or a trust or just an understanding.

the thing i found the most helpful was romanticising the fuck out of my friendships. idk if you've seen the way i talk to the people i'm closest with on here but it helps so much. we're stargazing together. we're napping together. we're writing each other love letters and poems and getting fake married. it's beautiful and it's so joyful.

i try to bask in the love i can feel rather than mourn the love that i can't.

and you know i still get blushy and butterflies sometimes, when people are particularly sweet or kind. sometimes it feels like little platonic crushes! (and i know that's "all" they are, bc if someone actually told me they felt romatically towards me i'd be pretty uncomfortable yknow?)

also like, if you want a qpr or a partner in the future just maybe take some time and think about how you'd like that to look for you! i can promise you, you will find other people like that, especially with the internet.

honestly realising i'm aro has opened me up so much more to love because i'm not watering down my affections for my friends in fear that it might look romantic. they know i'm aroace, they know i'm just being sillysweet and i know it's the same from them.

idk man, just remember romatic love isn't the only love that can make you feel whole. in the meantime i'm here for you!! i hope you're okay and i love you so very much <3

[readingoals]

I feel like I say this a lot in regards to aspec books but I really wanted to like this more than I did.

Now, maybe my problem is partly that a lot of aro and/or ace books are YA and I typically don't pick up YA anymore, but I think I feel justified in giving this book 2 stars even taking that into account.

Apologies, but it's going to get long and ranty so I'm putting this under a cut.

I hated the writing style. It was written in third person but to me it felt very clear that the author wanted to write in first person and was talked out of it. There are constant interruptions throughout the text of little side comments in brackets. (They looked like this.) (Often with two or three or even more in a row) (I think it was meant to come across as cute and quirky because oh boy is the MC supposed to be adorkable but fuck it annoyed me). And because it was written in third person but at least half of these bracketed interjections felt as if it was the MC commenting on things or they were her thoughts, the tone ended up being confusing. Every time the text said "Alice did this" or "Alice went there" I was like surprised because I expected it to be more from her point of view.

Speaking of Alice. Though she's like 19 or 20 in the story, she reads as quite a bit younger. Half of what she says sounds as if she's quoting the most annoying tumblrina possible. She says squee and has a "cutie code" which she uses to rank everything and her reactions to so much of what happens in the story felt like how a high schooler would react. Her only interests seem to be Netflix and food, but she refuses to learn to cook because she injured herself a couple of times when she did try. She writes analytical essays about the shows she watches which is fun except she says it's because shes like too sophisticated for fanfic or something which feels kinda shitty. And when a friend dares to suggest she might like dating someone who is also ace, she dismisses it out of hand.

The love interest was boring - his most defining feature was how hot he was - and more than once he seemed to overstep boundaries Alice had set (bugging her at work when she'd asked him not to, taking photos of her while she slept even tho shed made it clear she didnt love having her photo taken) but it was always positioned as him being cute and showing interest in her rather than it being creepy or rude. Similarly, the secondary characters were all pretty one dimensional.

As for plot. It was pretty weak. I kept waiting for anything to happen. Theres a whole thing about Alice being pushed by her family to become a lawyer even though she doesn't want to. And shes always going on about how she loves decorating rooms but as soon as someone suggests she should get into an interior design course she seems surprised it's a real job. Sorry but by the time I was 19 I knew what a fucking interior designer was! Especially for someone watching as much tv as she does....theres so many shows about decorating houses.

And then we get to the real big issues. Alice is asexual, which is great. Except that she's written so fucking badly. The way she talks about and explains her experiences with sex are contradictory. She frequently quotes tumblr when explaining being ace but doesn't seem to understand any of what she says. The author fell back on tired tropes and misunderstandings of asexuality. In fact Alice is barely a character who happens to be asexual. She is asexuality dressed up as a character. All she thinks about is being ace and not knowing if she wants sex or not. It's boring.

This isn't a spoiler since it's in the blurb and like chapter 1, but Alice's girlfriend breaks up with her because Alice doesn't want to have sex as much as she does. She is then positioned as evil through the whole rest of the book, completely demonised for it, even though Alice literally never told her she was ace. And then when the love interest says some similar things at one point, then it's glossed over and fixed in a day. They never have a real conversation about it, or about how to navigate a relationship when one of them is ace (and seemingly sex repulsed? Altho maybe not for him? It's never made clear) and the other is allo. In fact no one has any proper conversations about anything through the whole damn book.

At one point I thought we were going to get something real. Theres a scene at a party. Alice is hit on by a drunk guy who says some pretty gross things based on her skin colour. It would have been a fantastic opportunity to start a dialogue about how Alice's experiences as a black woman intersect with her asexual identity, especially in regards to being fetishised and sexualised because of racist stereotypes, and how experiencing that would feel as someone with no interest in sex. Instead it was glossed over and forgotten. And then a couple chapters later we got a pointless deep dive explanation into the idea of platonic soulmates which felt like the author was once again trying to prove her characters were friends without really doing the work to show it.

Look, you can tell the author was trying hard but she completely missed the mark, especially in regards to asexuality and what that means. She hit all the big dot points - that arousal and attraction are two different things, that there are multiple types of attraction, that asexuals can have and enjoy sex, that you can love someone romantically and still not want to have sex with them. And yet it felt as if the minute it was on the page, she totally forgot about it in order to manufacture the drama.

A total disappointment.

[wanderingandfound]

Sorry for yet another personal post I really should be asleep but with a) the time change, b) the lack of sleep medicine, and c) the fact that I've been staying up too late... well.

For days now I've been wanting to make out with someone. Like, not someone in particular. Just, now that I have kissed a person I know what that feels like and I want to continue it. It's not horniness (although that is there) and it's not touch starvation (I don't want to think about my relationship with physical contact atm). I don't even have a person in mind. I'm not interacting with any new people and I love the people I do interact with in very different, nonromantic ways. But also even if I did go out and meet new people it would take me so long to trust them enough to kiss, and that's without taking into account the respiratory pandemic I'm still scared of.

Here's this meme again although I will say I did socialize today! I saw all my home-based best friends, including the oldest (youngest) who no longer lives at home but is in town! We talked about books! And about three of their girlfriends (one is nonbinary but also a lesbian so I'm just gonna include them in that umbrella term)! ((I am not dwelling on how the only other one of us who isn't dating is ace, and possibly aro.)) ((My sister is going through utter heartbreak right now I have not been at a point in life where I want to open myself up to that.))

I dropped into a D&D session DM'd by my college-best-friend! Yesterday I talked with my internet-best-friend! My brother was in town yesterday and today! We played Portal 2! So much socializing!

Which like.... that's the thing! I already have so many people that I care about and do not see enough! I don't spend enough time with my grandma! Why would I try dating absolute randos????

But I wanna kiss somebody. :[

[eriexplosion]

All of the above but especially that it's the autistic nerd being the focus of the maybe romance thread. Honestly if Hunter got a girlfriend I'd be rolling my eyes but Tech doing a little bit of cute smiling... yes I adore that. Also anything to see him smile like that again is good with me.

ALSO I've screamed about this several times so sorry if I'm babbling but. This is important Tech characterization because we see the moment he goes from "ehhhhh" about the flirting to possibly interested! It's when she reveals why she retrieves all these items. The fact that she's doing this to return stolen and lost cultural items is something that visibly shifts Tech's behavior around her because good intentions are something important to him. It builds off his discussion on culture in episode 2 even. This isn't just empty flirty filler.

(And hell as an aro myself, it's super easy to read his behavior as not romantic but still wanting to get closer. Remember that he all but said he's never had a friend that isn't a clone. He's just gently testing the waters to see what he feels, nothing is being rushed at all.)

Why I Love Tech and Phee

I keep thinking about these two today and it just leads to me smiling uncontrollably (I'm literally grinning while I write this XD) so I'm just gonna talk about why these two work for me!

I'm usually not one to be on board with romances in shows that I find unnecessary. If anything, they can actually put me off if they get in the way of good storytelling. When I first saw Phee flirting with Tech back in episode 1, I found it amusing, but I was a little hesitant as to what they were going to do with it. It was fun in the moment, but I wasn't sure that I wanted it to go anywhere. Saying that, I kept an open mind because I didn't want to spend every episode where they appeared together feeling slightly angry about this thing I didn't want being there. And, hey! Maybe I'd even enjoy it!

Turns out I would. And there's a few reasons for this.

It isn't getting in the way of the plot

If this romance was starting to mess with the core story, then yeah, I wouldn't be that okay with it. However, it still feels very much like a thing in the background. It's there, it's noticeable, but it isn't getting in the way of anything and I appreciate that. As long as it stays that way, I have a good chance of staying in support of this.

It doesn't feel rushed

I hate love at first sight. I think it might be one of my least favourite tropes and while some people love it, I really struggle to get on board with it (minus the odd exception). When it comes to romantic connections between characters, I want to see it form. I want to see the journey that they go on. I don't want something where they meet and 5 minutes later they claim to be the love of each other's lives (not to say you can't enjoy this btw. It's just really not for me). But this isn't that!

I've seen some people saying that they're moving too quickly with it, but I really don't think that's the case. Sure, there are definitely flirtatious moments, but they're pretty subdued. A few looks, a couple of small touches here and there, but nothing extreme. I know everyone has their own idea as to what qualifies as moving too quickly, but from some of the reactions I've seen, you'd think they'd be getting married in next episode. It's not like that! I actually like the pacing of this connection. It's a little tentative, just some indications that there's interest there and they're taking it at their own pace.

I really like Phee!

When we were first introduced to Phee, I liked her as a cool, sassy pirate, but I didn't really trust her (in the same way that I love but don't trust Hondo Ohnaka). The initial "brown eyes" comment was funny, but I didn't want her getting too close to Tech if she was someone to be worried about. We all love Tech, so of course we're all gonna be a little protective over him. We just don't want him getting hurt.

And then episode 5 happened and I still didn't trust her. I loved that she was acting like a role model for Omega and she was giving the kid a chance to spend some time with someone other than the Batch, but I still didn't trust her. It felt like she was still trying to use them for her own advantage and I didn't like that.

But then we come to episode 13 and that distrust has definitely faded. She wasn't trying to get artefacts for herself, she was trying to take them back to people who would appreciate and connect to them. She was also willing to take the squad to a safe place away from Cid, a place where Omega could spend time with kids her own age. It wasn't for her own benefit. She actually did it for them.

I love Phee for this. She's shown that she isn't who we thought she was. She's better and I think Tech is noticing that as well.

It isn't ruining Tech as a character

One of my worries with Tech having a love interest was that I wasn't sure if they would make it feel out of character for him. If Tech had been really flirtatious back, then it would've just felt wrong. Instead, they are willing to show that he's a little nervous about the whole thing. He doesn't really know what his feelings are or what they mean and so he's a bit tentative. When she calls him Brown Eyes early on in the ep, he looks thrown off for a second because he isn't used to the nickname. He also glances at her hand when she places it on his shoulder because he doesn't know how to feel about the whole thing. It's unexpected. Even when he listens to her and looks at the lights, he isn't quite sure how to process that situation but he's a little more open about it.

To me it seems perfectly in keeping with his character; a little hesitant, a little unsure, confused about what he's feeling, shy, bashful. It makes sense for him and it's ADORABLE!

They work well together

What I absolutely love about this dynamic is that Phee is getting Tech to open up a bit and appreciate the world in a slightly less analytical way, but she isn't trying to change him. She does actually find his personality endearing and she just wants him to loosen up a bit, start feeling more comfortable with the world.

And what's even better is that it's working! Yes, Tech is still nervous and unsure, but he does actually start to acknowledge that there might be something there. That moment at the end of the episode where he says that he had thought about the Batch staying and Phee responds with "did you now?". It's a little bit of teasing from her but he doesn't get flustered or stunned, he just SMILES AT HER! And it's a cute, wholesome, genuinely comfortable smile and omg I actually love this moment so much, it's so cute aaaaaahhhhh!!!

It's Tech that has the love interest

I don't just appreciate this relationship because of the way it's been handled, but also the fact that this is the character they've chosen to give this part of the story to. So many showrunners would give the love interest to the charming, dark, broody, "conventionally attractive" man (aka Hunter) but no! They actually let this play out with Tech, an autistically-coded nerd with a stupid-ass looking hairline (sorry) and we don't get enough of that! I know some people headcanon him as aroace and I don't want to discredit that, but I also love how we're showing that yes, awkward, nerdy charm is something that people appreciate!

Wrecker ships it

I don't have much to say here. Wrecker teasing his brother is just so cute and I love it!!!

Ending Thoughts

So yeah, that's how I feel about this. I was sceptical at first but this episode made me fall in love with this pairing. It's wholesome and cute and I love this for Tech. He deserves it! Having a relationship between a badass WOC and a neurodivergent character is something that I'm happy we're getting. That's not to say that the show doesn't have its issues, but this is just so great to see.

I know that not everyone is on board with this and I'm not going to discredit those opinions. Everyone's going to disagree on things and that's fine. I totally understand some of the qualms that people have about this ship and I support the existence of those criticisms!

(However, if anyone hates it so much that they are willing to turn to racist, ableist or sexist remarks about it then I kindly ask you to leave this page alone because I don't want that kind of bigotry.)

I'm excited to see where they go with the Tech/Phee pairing because it's really cute. I hope that they don't let it bleed into the main story too much though because I don't want it to start become detrimental to the plot.

Anyway, this is a pro-Tee account and I'm very happy to just gush about them because happy Tech makes me smile so much! 😁

LOOK AT THIS 😭

Edit: gonna tag @phis-writing because I know she's also been loving Tee. 🥰

[ghost-inacup]

So, how does amatonormativity fuck a person up? (i made the aro survey)

omg okay so hi bestie sit down have some tea cause i might go on an endless rant here:

okay, so lets begin by defining amatonormativity: it is the societal expectation of everyone wanting an exclusive, long term romantic relationship and would be better off with it. some common assumptions made due to this are :

Assuming that everyone wants to get married, and unmarried/unpartnered people are unhappy or lonely

Treating romantic relationships as more important than friendships

The structuring of society around married couples (housing, taxes, etc.)

“Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend yet?” (sourced from: https://sophia.smith.edu/aace/about-asexuality-and-aromanticism/allonormativity-and-amatonormativity/)

Now, while this affects many queer identities, i can only provide an aro perspective on it.

Growing up, all around me, from as young as kindergarten, romantic relationships were prioritised. even 3 year olds who didn't even grasp the concept of romance were like, oh they're dating now, oh they're married now, etc. throughout my life, the expectation that everyone will eventually pursue a romantic relationship was a constant.

And that fucks you up.

Lets start with the fact that it forced me into thinking it would be my end all goal. i would meet a guy, have a romantic relationship, marry him, have kids, the whole package. And that led to quite a few situations where i forced myself to act like i felt romantic attraction, to convince myself to do things i was not ready for. It led to heartache and probably contributed to my depression. It led to destruction of friendships and led to an unhealthy relationship, which i will say is still affecting me. half a decade later and i still berate myself over those things, it has affected my self perception a lot.

then, when i discovered i was aro,(and its still going on tbh) it made me think i was not normal. it led to the realisation of my othering in a way, for i would never truly know what it is that society prizes and lauds so much. It led to a feeling of isolation and forced me to internalise a lot of shit, and probably bottle up things which i still haven't told anyone about.

then, the linking of my self worth with someone showing romantic interest in me. the feeling that something is wrong with me, physically, mentally, emotionally, just because someone never said hey i like you. the fear thats still within me that i am undesirable and not worthy. that even in movies the "ugly" girl sometimes ends up with a boy so why cant i? it led me to cling unhealthily to anyone who shows/ed me even a modicum of affection, to such an unhealthy degree that it destroyed a friendship, all in the wish that i was worthy of someone's love. all in the feeling that if no one likes me romantically, i do not have worth. i would be just someone people barely tolerate and leave as soon as they can.

also, as a cupioromantic: it fucks me up even more. cause i know wanting a relationship is sort of enforcing amatonormativity but fuck, it would be nice to have. and also, the fear that what will i say to an unsuspecting person, who gets in a relationship with me? with the expectation that it will be romantic? " hey sorry i can never love you romantically but i love you with my whole heart and i hope thats enough?" and then watching them leave cause if there isn't romance whats the damn point?

it hurts every time i think people getting in relationships, expecting me to relate about romantic attraction, them saying "you will also get one don't worry" them being allies but not even knowing aromantic and treating me like i'm a cold hearted monster who could never love truly and its the mourning in the corner of my heart for the fact that i can never experience what people say is a fundamental feeling and in the end,

it fucks you up.

[aro-absol]

My Aro playlist (the perfect soundtrack for ASAW!)

A while ago I made an aro playlist that I keep adding songs on. It's on an account that I don't feel comfortable sharing but I thought I could tell y'all what songs are on it because aro songs are not easy to find. So here you go.

Note: this playlist is tailored to my personal music taste. It's mostly pop. I know there are more out there (Cavetown) but these are the songs I like to listen to. Besides, you might interpret these songs differently. They were clearly not written to be aromantic songs but they sound pretty aro to me ( but obviously you don't have to agree).

I tried to sort them into categories (at least roughly) so can find songs you relate to better.

I used an alien emoji to mark the songs containing internalized arophobia (in my opinion) if you want to avoid those.

Enjoy!

Being happy about being aro/not feeling romantic attraction:

Never been in love - Will Jay

Curse - Emily Burns

Zero feelings - Zoe Clark

Being somebody's crush but you can't reciprocate:

Sorry - Halsey

I wanna love you but I don't - Ben Platt

I won't - H.E.R.

Crush - Glades

FRIENDS - Marshmello, Anne-Marie

I don't know - Gabe Bondoc

Idle Worship - Paramore

I help you hate me - Sunrise Avenue

Dating someone but turns out dating isn't for you:

Bad liar - Imagine Dragons

Liked you better - Good problem, Boy in space

Turning out pt. ii - AJR

Psychofreak - Camila Cabello, Willow 👽

Someone else - ClockClock

I wasn't made to fall in love - Miko 👽

For when the Romance Repulsion hits:

Crush Culture - Conan Gray

I'm so tired... - Lauv, Troye Sivan

Never Fall in love - Jack Antonoff, MØ

Romance is boring - Los Campesinos!

Love is for losers - The Longshot

Don't fall in love - Danko Jones

This fall - The Duhks

Romantic - Hooverphonic

Being happily single:

Good thing - Zedd, Khelani

Soulmate - Lizzo

No - Meghan Trainor

It's not you it's me - Bea Miller

I don't wanna be in love (dance floor anthem) - Good Charlotte

I just wanna be single - Brika

Me, Myself and I - Blonde, Bryn Christopher

Dating myself - sad alex

Aroallo anthems (sex mentions):

Not a love song - bülow

Leave before you love me - Marshmello, Jonas Brothers

What's love gotta do with that - Tina Turner

Extra Agenda - Claudia Valentina

Thief - Ansel Elgort 👽

Girlfriend - Bea Miller

Animal - Sir Chloe

Best Friend - The Weeknd

Yuck - Charli XCX

Cupioromantic anthems:

Hopeless Romantic - Sam Fischer 👽

People watching - Conan Gray

Love like that - Lauv

Love love love - Of Monsters and men 👽

High Definition - Waterparks

"No it's not romantic":

Despair - Leo.

Not a love song - Austin Moon

Not wanting to fall in love:

I don't wanna fall in love - Addison Grace

I don't need love - Niic

I don't want love - The Antlers

No lover - Jetty Bones

Your friend is dating someone that is bad for them and you're just *facepalms*

Devil doesn't Bargain - Alec Benjamin

Snap out of it - Arctic Monkeys

No Romeo - Dylan

Third Wheel - Zoe Wees

Aro songs I couldn't really sort in any of those categories but are still dope:

Mad at Disney - Salem Ilese

Turning out - AJR

Loveless girl - Pale Waves 👽

I've never written a song about a boy - Eva Westphal

[kim-poce]

My relationship with romance is weird, like, I'm aro but I'm not a romance-repulsed aro, if I had to word it I would say I'm romance-exhausted aro.

It's a whole life of romance being shoved down as the only real strong link between two people.

Years of people showing characters grows by the moment they go from "alone and cold" to "loving romantic partner"

Years of people impling or straight up saying that the only way to be complete is if you have a romantic relationship.

Some peoplee don't even believe in Aromantics. I had a colleague asking if I wasn't just "with a broken heart", so many people say "you just didn't find the right person yet" my psychology asked of this isn't just my insecurities, and said I could still date as long as I didn't call it "date."

When I explained more, my colleague said "this sounds sad, sorry" and like, this is what everyone is learned to think! You can only be happy if you date, if you marry, if you have romance. Someone who doesn't date is "sad" and "alone" and has "no one to take care of them"

I know that romance make people happy, I don't know how, I don't understand it and no one has better explanations than "you'll know when you feel it" but I'm happy for them! I'm happy they are happy doing theirs thing, feeling their thing.

When I see romance in media I find it cute, somehow, I get happy for the characters and everything. But I'm done, I'm tired of seeing romance on everything, I'm tired.

I want read things with no romance, where romance isn't even mentioned. Not because I hate romance but come on EVERYTHING ELSE HAS ROMANCE ALREADY and I want things free on them.

I want to read a book with a female MC and when a hot guy shows up I don't want to think "oh the male lead", I want to see a movie with a guy doing cool stuff not to earn someone's love for it.

I don't want "not being in a romantic relationship" being treated as moral failure.

I don't want to see people to look at to children just playing together and go "look he has a new girlfriend!"

I don't want people to grow up thinking that they NEED to be in relationship or else they are failing on life.

I don't want people to throw themselves in relationship because this is what is expected of them.

I don't hate romance, I'm not romance-repulsed but I'm romance-exhausted.

[lynxgriffin]

Heya, so probably over a year ago by now I asked about asexuality saying I thought I was ace but not aro.

Well I'm definitely ace but not sure if I'm aro or not. May I ask how you realised you're aro? (Obviously you absolutely do not have to say if you don't want to). I'm currently very confused on if what I feel for my boyfriend is romantic attraction or 'I really like hanging out with you' because the internet hasn't really been able to give me an explanation of what romantic attraction feels like. (Not helped by the fact that I have wanted to be a lesbian since I was 16 or so, not sure why I wanted to be a lesbian but I still find myself wanting to be one so that's probably adding confusion).

Sorry this got kind of long. And I am aware of how counter-productive it sounds to ask an aromantic person what romantic attraction feels like but maybe you have insight, idk.

Yeah, it's kind of a hard thing to explain, since it's kind of...proving a negative? And I imagine that romantic attraction can feel pretty different across both cultures and individual people. I also imagine there's a lot of crossover in feelings between "friends I really want to hang out with" and "romantic partner." I guess for myself, I've just asked myself "do I feel like I want/need a boyfriend/girlfriend/romantic partner?" And at least for me, the answer is no. I want and need friendships, my family, and heck I'd even like a housemate some days. I want people I can talk to and hang out with, share laughs and memories with, or hug if needed. But I can't think of a distinction where I'd go "this person has a special connection that stands them apart from my friends or even people I live with."

So I guess the question is...is there a unique feeling you have with your boyfriend that stands them apart from other friends? Even if you can't quite define what that feeling is? Then maybe that's a kind of romance.

And don't forget, everything in gender and sexuality and related exists on a spectrum...you might not find yourself as a hard aromantic, but maybe somewhere in the orbit of it! It's okay if you see a label and can't figure out if it's for you or not. With more time you may decide "yes, this is an accurate description," or you may decide "no, this isn't for me," or even "this is for me, but just sometimes."

I hope this makes sense and helps, at least some!