#sooooooo proud of this fic!!! i spent a lot of time on it!!!

[that-was-anticlimactic]

sun comes streaming through the window (& i can't sleep anymore)

Kenji shook his head. “It’s not that, exactly. I sleep whenever I eat. So I always sleep after breakfast, lunch, and dinner. By the time it’s actually time to go to bed, I’ve already slept an hour or more depending on how much I eat. I already wasted hours of my day. And…” he sighed, huffing, “I have trouble sleeping at night if I sleep during the day.”

Fukuzawa warned him that food may be an issue with Kenji, but neither of them even thought about how his ability could mess up his sleep.

The more Kunikida learned about Kenji’s ability, the more it upset him. Not because Kenji caused trouble, but because he’s still just a kid. His ability messed with the way he ate—it's almost like he’s on a diet.

Kenji had the kind of strength people would kill for, the kind of power people have died for, but it came at the price of eating.

[or, five times someone from the agency noticed kenji had a strained relationship with eating and sleeping and one time he didn't]

🌥20,941 words | kenji-centric, bsd found family⛅️

[jaylaxies]

Nana's CAN'T YOU SEE ME review starts here (excuse the profanity):

He softly pressed his lips on your cheek in a feather-light kiss. -- bestie I don't like kids but this was CUTE

Your name was his favourite word to say out loud -- SHUT UP I hate it when ppl call me by my first name but if it's little Heeseung MAYBE IT'S NOT THAT BAD

HYBE UNIVERSITY ASYDASHDKASDHASKDJ

AH YES, ENTER MINGYU THE BITCH IN THIS STORY

Although, what he didn’t expect to see was you opening the door with your lipstick smudged and breathing rigged, -- GASP! NO!

“Let the kid go, you can meet him later,” -- who tf you calling kid you stupid muscly man

he couldn’t fathom you had a boyfriend and you didn’t even bother telling him, did he mean so little to you? -- NO BECAUSE I GET THE HURT!!!! LIKE WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL HEESEUNG? THAT'S JUST MEAN LIKE AREN'T YOU CLOSE!!!! BITCH!

Not HEeseung crying while eating WHAT A MOOD

I'm team Heeseung here, yn can go cry in a ditch

“Was she tall with long hair?” you asked. -- IS IT FUCKING SOOHA?!?! THAT BITCHHHHHHHHH NOT HERE TOO HAHAHAHAHA

Heeseung be like ALEXA PLAY YOU BELONG WITH ME BY TAYLOR SWIFT

can Mingyu stop calling Heeseung "the kid" it makes my blood boil

seeing Hee in the driver’s seat was mesmerizing, his eyes fixated on the road, lip slightly bitten with concentration and fingers gripping the steering wheel in an attractive manner. -- I FELT THAT because I never get driven around much except by my parents so when a guy friend does it I'm like WOW you are instantly attractive in my eyes

TAKE ME TO A BEACH TOO TF

You weren’t sad you got caught, in fact, you’ll always wish for Heeseung to be the one who catches you. -- bye sappy af I hate it here

Okay Mingyu has got a point the way yn spends a lot of time with Hee and if Mingyu was a nicer guy I would have been on his side BUT HE'S BEEN WHORING AROUND TOO SO FUCK HIM!

AND SHE THREW THE PUNCH! THE CROWD CHEERS!

You weren’t sure if the reason for your crying was because you wasted your time on an asshole or the fact that you could have potentially spent that time with Heeseung instead. -- UGH I FELT THAT I hate when I break up and instantly feel I wasted MY TIME

bestie I remember you asking me a valid reason to break up HAHAHAHAH THIS IS GOOD

ugh I love it when men stand up for me UGGGH Hee saying he'll unalive Mingyu is A MOOD like my best friend one time found out about my crush who hurt me and went like "that fucking asshole" AND HE NEVER CUSSED BEFORE HADHASHA

Bigger than you think -- EXCUSE ME I CHOKED ON MY DRINK

ngl I didn't think much about noona until Mingyu said it too BHAHAHAHA YEAH WHY DON'T YOU CALL HER NOONA, HEE?

THE KISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

YOU'RE WORTH THE WAIT BYE WHEN WILL SOMEONE EVER SAY THAT TO ME

“Let me make love to you, noona.” -- that's it I'm out.

And you knew you would love him for the entirety of your life.

AS YOU SHOULD!!!! LOVE THIS OMG I'm so sorry it took sooooooo long for me to read I didn't want to read anything except Jay for the longest time HAHSAHDASHDASH but I came, I saw, I conquered this mf fic. So proud of you for writing it! I know how many thoughts went into this work and I'm glad you shared it with me.

I DONT LIKE KIDS EITHER BUT HEE??? yes and also your name is so pretty wtf are you talking about? hybe uni yes 😭‼️ AND SOOHA? BYE IM CRYING RN JAJSJAJA THIS IS SO COOL THANK YOU SM FOR READING THIS AND LEAVING THIS BIG ASS ASK I APPRECIATE IT A LOT AND HAVE SOME JAY PICS AS A THANK YOU 💙

[decembermoonskz]

— 🌙💜🦉 content creator - 2020 review  

i was tagged my so many lovelies !! thank you @sleepylixie​ @n8dlesoupguk​ @delicatewerewolfsoul​ @meiiyue​ @chogiwow​ for tagging me! 

here we go!! :D

1. First creation of 2020 and most recent creation of 2020:

most recent: Right now it’d be the bday timestamp I made for lily and Snowfall, my jack frost!jeongin fic (but i’m working on broken compass aka mad king!chan atm) first: It’s actually an unposted chan fic pfff I made it in january of 2020, but at the time I wasn’t even on tumblr (it was a demon!chan fic)

2. One of your favorite creations from 2020:

I think I have more than one favorite but I’d say Lie To Me my witch!chan fic I made is one of my favorites I’ve made so far, and Broken Compass although it isn’t released yet (psst go check out the masterlist and snippets now to get ready for it!)

3. A creation you’re really proud of:

Daffodil, without a doubt. On top of it being one of my longest fics I’ve ever written, the process that went into making it and the fact that it’s what helped me start posting makes it something I’m really proud of. 

4. A creation that took you forever:

Uuuuh still Daffodil LOL xD It’s such a long fic and I spent a good amount of time redrafting and proofreading, (it’s also almost 30k words sooooooo-) but yeah it’s such a long fic that it’s length alone is probs the one that took forever. Broken Compass is also taking a while but it’s also a multi-part series. >v>a (although my 100 followers drabbles took me a minute too but not quite as long)

5. A creation from 2020 that received the most notes:

Daffodil again, it’s almost at 400 notes which I think is crazy and I’m super thankful for that honestly, it means the world that people really enjoyed, osme even said it was their favorite or favorirte chan fic they’ve read and that just really touched my heart. TTwTT

6. A creation you think deserved more notes:

Hmmm I’m not really caught up on the amount of notes my works get if I’m being honest. Of course I’d like for ppl to enjoy what I put out, but this blog is more so for me to practice sharing my work so whatever amount of notes I get is fine. If I had to pick one that I hope gets more recognition someday then..... I’ll just go with Lie To Me and probably Remedy, two fics from my series The Lost Luna (really just all of TLL I hope more people can enjoy it ^v^)

7. A new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it:

Uuuuh I only write for skz and that’s not really a new fandom since I’ve been stanning them since about May of 2018 so yeah. xD

8. A creation you made that breaks your heart:

Probably Crow’s Blood, Minho’s part of TLL. It’s one of the more angsty fics I’ve written, but also Close Call one of my Jisung drabbles made me kinda emo too. My heart goes out to him in that one hehe

9. A ‘simple’ creation you really love:

Oh oh! One of my timestamps! [3:01pm] it has Chan as a thief and the mc is a princess. It’s so simple and cute and a lot of people actually really enjoyed it much to my pleasant surprise! ^^ Some even asked for a part 2 so I’ve been playing around with the idea. It was an idea that hit me and I wrote it on the spot and posted it soon after. (I also think my mailbox asks are cute which is basically small bite-sized skz soft hours asks)

10. A creation that was inspired by another one:

Hmmm.... I suppose I was inspired to make The Lost Luna after seeing some witch!svt fics by @puppetwritings​ if that counts? Like seeing them write for seventeen and make them witches inspired me and made me think that stray kids as witches would be cool! plus I didn’t feel like witch!skz was something you saw very often so I went for it.

11. A favorite creation made by someone else:

Oh boy I don’t have just one so here’s a list of my recs FICS IN BOLD  ARE NSFW/18+ SO MINORS DO NOT ENGAGE AND PLEASE RESPECT AUTHOR’S GUIDELINES ABOUT NOT HAVING MINORS ON THEIR BLOGS

(these are mainly bang chan fics... forgive me my bias is showing so heavily here >/////<)

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ That Mixtape Love, In Umbra and Only Fools Rush In by @sleepylixie ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Prowl, Standby by @skzctnightnight ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Midnight Snack by @rebecca-noona  ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Bittersweet and Things You Said At 1am by @n8dlesoupguk ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Storm Wanderer by @aliceu​ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Seesaw 2020 ver. by @dreaminghaos​ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Lucky and You Love Me by @dreamescapeswriting​ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ 11:11 by @lettersfromaphrodite​​ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ A to Z Boyfriend Bang Chan by @rosieecheeks​​ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Crimson by @mikoto-ica-fics​ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Phobia by @hanflix​  ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Date A Boy Who Makes You Mixtapes and A Dress Made of Starlight by @moonlit-han​ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ Love You Unconditionally and Pporappippam by @chaninfused​   ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ [2:38pm] by @staylibrary​​ 

these all are so good and I’m probably forgetting some more honeslty (y’all are so talented oof-)

12. Some of your favorite content creators from this year:

@sleepylixie​ @skzctnightnight​ @rebecca-noona​ @n8dlesoupguk​ @aliceu​ @dreamescapeswriting​ @mikoto-ica-fics​ @hanflix​ @moonlit-han​ @lettersfromaphrodite​ @chaninfused​ @delicatewerewolfsoul​ @rosieecheeks​​ @meiiyue​ @binniesthighs​ 

13. And for good measure, another couple of creations of yours you love:

oh um hmmm I linked a bunch of my stuff already but I’ll go ahead and link some more that I haven’t already LOL I enjoyed writing: 

fraglie - bc tempting - lmh  [6:03pm] - lmh in your dreams - hhj stand by me - scb rise again - hjs catch that royal - lf brown sugar - yji 

[luxuriouschest]

Yay hello! It’s Ella. I’m asking anonymously because Tweendeck is just my side blog and there’s no point in showing my main one. Tumblr told me you started following me with your BNHA blog and omg I’m absolutely over the moon with this fact! Thank you so much for still being interested in my art ♥️♥️♥️ But rn I’m struggling with such a huge art block and have no idea how to overcome it. Can you maybe give me some advise or if you ever went through the same shit what helped you?

Ahhhh omggg! Hi, Ella! 🥰 I'm really sorry to hear you're going through art block right now. Tbh, I've been going through a pretty severe creative block myself recently so I perfectly understand how you feel.

Firstly, allow me to shower you in positive feedback and compliments lmao. I wanted to tell you that I spent a good chunk of the morning flailing over your art with my friend @matcha-castella in discord. I linked a few of your pieces to her and she was quickly ass deep in your art tag going ham much like I was the first time I discovered your art lol.

Your art is beautiful. Everything, from the way you draw poses and expressions to the povs to the amount of depth you achieve in your shading is sooooo viscerally stunning that every time I see something you've drawn, I spend at least five or ten minutes zoomed in on the image admiring every minute detail. You achieve a mood with you art that I find incredibly rare, and that's the ability to make me feel like I'm sitting in the room with whatever character you draw. I can feel their mood, read their body language, and be fully immersed in every single piece you've drawn.

I know it sounds like I'm waxing poetic here, but I'm dead serious lol. I wasn't joking at all when I said your art adds ten years to my life every time I see it. I am a big, big fan of you work and first and foremost, I want you to know that. I don't get the chance to leave a whole lot of in depth comments on artists works because I always feel like I'm being weird by doing so lol, but I have so much respect and admiration for not just the skill, but the time and the effort and the emotions artists like you put into your creations.

You are amazing and your art is amazing, and I appreciate you sooooooo much 💕 Thank you for sharing your beautiful art.

As far as climbing the mile high hurdle that is a creative block goes, in order to overcome it, I usually have to force myself to. That sounds a lot more brutal than it is, but that's the gist lol.

I'll usually sit back and begin working on something with absolutely no plan and no foresight whatsoever. I usually don't even plan on posting it anywhere. I'm just creating for the sole purpose of doing so. That's how my icon came to be, actually.

I'll doodle, edit, write drabbles, or just dick around in photoshop and pray that an idea strikes me in the process. Sometimes this works immediately and I end up with something I'm really proud of. Other times, it takes a number of tries before I finally get the creative juices flowing again. It relieves a lot of pressure because regardless of whether or not I'm happy with the end product is irrelevant because I went into it with no idea, no plan, and no sense of 'I must create this thing!' looming over me. If I end up dissatisfied, I can always try again the next day and that sense of whatever I'm making not needing to be perfect or even cohesive really helps me overcome a lot of my creative blocks. It gives me freedom to experiment and explore and fuck up lmao. Which in turn leads me to finding solutions that work and ideas flowing along with said solutions.

If this method fails me, I'll seek inspiration elsewhere. I'll either go over the series pertaining to the content I'm trying to create again, or I'll dabble in something else entirely. I'll do things I enjoy that free up my thinking space and force me to focus like reading fics or playing video games. That way, I can at least go into the creative process with a fresh perspective.

Bouncing ideas off someone else is another thing that really helps me. If I throw an idea out for something, and someone comes at me excited about that idea, I'm suddenly a lot more motivated to try and make the idea a tangible thing.

These methods aren't foolproof by any means, but it's what keeps me in the creative groove. Or forces me back into it at any rate lmao.

As far as advice goes, I feel the best advice I can give is don't be so hard on yourself. All creators go through blocks. It sucks ass, but it's all a part of the process. Try not to stress yourself out by focusing on your art block and turn that focus to other things that make you happy. When you feel up to it, keep creating and take breaks in between as you need them. Try and fail and try again. So long as you keep creating something, anything, even if it's weeks or months in between your attempts, you'll overcome that block eventually.

I'm wishing you the absolute best, Ella and please know my inbox is always open for whatever you may need. Whether it's just to chat, bounce ideas around, vent, etc. I hope this post helps even just a little and that you can kick your art block square in the balls here soon 💕

YALL GO FOLLOW @tweendeck!

[theunrealinsomniac]

Catch Up

Oh hey, tag game, neat. @wishfulcynic tagged me and thanks dude for saying you were a fan of my fics, that’s real cool :-)

Rules: tag every person you want to know better/catch up with and then answer the following questions.

Three ships:

BatCat - DC

Cal/Merrin - Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order

Sokka/Suki - Avatar: The Last Airbender

I tried to go a bit out there with my ships because ... well, if at this point you don’t know my big ships ... you’re not paying attention lol. But yes, for the record:

NaruSaku is my biggest ship. Fight me.

Last songs listened to:

OMG by Camila Cabello feat. Quavo

Treat You Better by Shawn Mendes

Two Is Better Than One by Boys Like Girls feat. Taylor Sweet

And for anyone interested, those are three songs from my NaruSaku writing playlist. Yes, I may indeed reveal my playlist, if I feel like it lol.

Currently Watching:

Oof, well currently not a great deal as everything I watch is currently on a break waiting for the new seasons to come out, lots of which were held back or ended quickly cus plague, but I’m looking forward to these three with the most anticipation:

My Hero Academia English Dub

Wandavision

The Witcher Season 2

Currently Reading:

 Oh, I am just like the worst person to ask about books, I am currently in the middle of sooooooo many books and fanfic but I’m terrible at picking them back up when I reach a stopping point.

I’m meant to be reading:

Dracula Cha Cha Cha by Kim Newman

Luke Skywalker and the Shadows Of Mindor by Matthew Stover

Grave Robin by OccasionalStorytelling

But you know, Christmas and work and writing and ack. I’m a bad writer who watches too many reruns of his favourite old shows on Netflix when he should be being cultured and experiencing new things.

How’s It Going:

Well ... I’m still sucking down air so you know ... not so bad.

But for real, I’ve had some lows, some highs, some really bad lows and some pretty good highs. I wrote more this year than I think I ever had and I am seriously proud of that fanfic.

I encourage you all to go read it if you’re a NaruSaku fan, I’ll drop the link at the end of the post.

I’ve also been the very proud boyfriend of my girlfriend who has done amazing with her new job and is just all around fantastic and amazing and makes me outstandingly happy with the simplest of greetings. 

I had a bit of a bad time of it during the lead up to Christmas where I was doing just a bit too much all at once and not noticing that I was headed towards a crash but I pulled myself out of it in time to properly enjoy Christmas and that was lovely. Even with my head cold that I got on Christmas Eve.

Yeah, you want to sum up my 2020? I spent Christmas with my family, while nursing a head cold so bad that I napped for an hour and a half on Christmas Day.

Really good with some really bad.

Tagging: I’m lazy and ill so if any of my lovely followers want to play this game, consider yourself TAGGED!

Oh and as promised:

An Absolutely, Totally, Non-Romantic Wedding Date - https://archiveofourown.org/works/23484832/chapters/56308951

[thespace-dragon]

*completely ignores the last update time and posts this* hahha hey guys!! yes i havent forgotten about this and tbh, im procrastinating on other fics with this, sooooooo have some langst~

Summary: On the battlefield, anything can happen. Never turn a blind eye to the possibilities.

WC: 2470

Chapters: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6]

Ao3

Alright, so the bonding time he had with Blue didn’t go that great. It was fine, it was the first time they tried it – well, second, but the first time was pretty much an emergency. They had to bond a little or else the Galra would have erased them from the universe.

So, yeah, bonding only happened for the sake of survival.

Keith led Lance out of the cockpit and walked beside him while they meandered throughout the castle. If Lance ignored the way Keith’s jacket shifted (he could hear it since it was the only leather thing on this ship), he could have almost passed the silence off as comfortable. Lately, the two of them have been spending more time together, but it wasn’t a major thing. Like, it wasn’t as if they were actively seeking each other out, it just happened. Mostly when Lance disappeared for too long and Keith came and found him, but after that when Keith knew he was okay, he stuck around. Lance was ready to call them friends in terms of their relationship instead of teammates. Which was a significant shift from teammate and rival.

Keith’s jacket squeaked a little for the umpteenth time and Lance swore it was as if Keith was turning to look at him, think about it, and then look away.

“Okay, what gives.”

He heard Keith stumble slightly before recovering. “Nothing.”

"Keith, you jacket makes a noise every time you turn to me, and it's happened like five times. It's obviously something." Lance nudged him in what he hoped was Keith's arm.

The red paladin grumbled something under his breath.

“Ya know, I may be blind, and my hearing is wonderful, but it’s not that great. You gotta speak up, Keith.”

Keith sighed and pulled Lance to a stop with a hand on his elbow. Lance crossed his arms and faced Keith’s general direction.

“I’m over here, you idiot,” Keith muttered, gently turning him.

“Oh, thanks…”

His friend sighed again and shifted his feet, the soles rubbed against the floor. Lance waited.

After a moment, Keith spoke, “Why were you crying inside your lion?”

Lance sucked in a breath and looked away. He felt like his body was gearing up to cry again –  his chest suddenly hurt, his head pounded and his heart felt like it stopped for a moment.

“You don’t have to tell me everything, I was just… just curious.” Keith buried his hands in his pockets and shrugged. “Just making sure you’re doing okay. As a friend.”

Lance shoved his own hands into his pockets, wriggling his toes inside this shoes. “Yeah, I’m okay, was just trying to bond with Blue.”

“And it didn’t go well?”

Lance frowned and looked down, blinking back his tears. He tried to keep his eyes closed as much as possible, everyone's reactions were nearly the same when he opened them out of habit. They either flinched away or immediately switched to doting on him. He'd rather keep his eyes closed and hide as much of the damage as possible.

“Yeah… it didn’t.”

Keith shifted again. “I’m sure she will come around.”

Lance nodded and bit his lip. He desperately wanted Blue to bond with him, he just didn’t know how to reach that point. Not even Keith had reached that level with Red.

“That’s the hope.”

Keith patted his shoulder and nudged him into walking again, the same direction they were going before they stopped. “You could always talk to Shiro, he was able to get the Black Lion to bond with him enough so he could see through her.”

“Wait, how’d you know –”

Lance could almost hear Keith roll his eyes and smirk. “C’mon Lance, it’d be the most logical thing to do.”

“Haha, okay wise guy, you haven’t managed to perfect that skill either.”

Keith laughed. “I know. And that’s the reason why you should talk to Shiro, he has.”

Lance raised his eyebrows in awe; Keith the Garrison’s best fighter pilot after Shiro, mister perfection himself, admitted to not having done something.

“Okay, who are you and what have you done with Keith?”

“Uh, nothing? I’m still me.”

“Riiiight, I so totally believe you.”

Keith laughed again and bumped shoulders with Lance. He could feel the tension melt away as they joked around a little. It felt like Lance wasn’t even blind.

The next day, Lance was wandering around, looking for Shiro. He missed meal time, something that had become a habit lately. It was hard to sleep when everything was already dark. Lance's internal clock was knocked out of rhythm and now he has the hardest time figuring out when it was the day cycle or the night cycle. And by the time he did – mostly because of Hunk's snoring – it was already well into the wee hours of the morning. When he fell asleep, it was still fitful and full of tossing and turning before his mind exhausts itself and lets him fall into unconsciousness.

So here he was, searching for their oh-so-awesome leader and ask him how the heck he managed to bond with the Black Lion so well after slurping down a bowl of food goo.

“Dammit, Shiro, where are y-”

Lance bounced off a solid and quite warm wall before hands grabbed his shoulders to keep him from falling.

“You okay, Lance?” Shiro asked.

Well, speak of the devil and he shall appear.

Lance rubbed his nose gingerly, it was smarting a little after running into Shiro. The guy really needed to take a break, those muscles were like rocks.

“Yeah, I’m fine, was actually looking for you.”

Shiro chuckled and turned Lance around to walk in the direction that he was originally heading. He kept a light hand on Lance’s shoulder.

“Okay, what’s up?”

Lance gnawed on his bottom lip for a second before diving right in. “Do you remember when we were on Arus and we just got all the Lions together? Like, the training exercises that Coran put us through?”

He heard Shiro sigh. “All too well, but what about them? Does this have something to do with your sight?”

“Yeah. Remember that one flight exercise we did where we had to see through our lions?”

“You mean the one where you and Keith raced to see who could hit that ground fastest?”

Lance scowled and flopped his hand around. “Okay, that was not the point, but if that’s the way you remember it, sure, that one.”

The older paladin laughed and patted Lance’s shoulder. “Meant nothing by it, but yes, I do remember.”

They turned a corner, Shiro gently guiding Lance along as they walked to wherever Shiro was going. From the way their steps echoed around them, they had to be close to the control room or the giant ballroom where they hosted the Arusians. Something told Lance it was the control room.

“Okay, so, how did you figure it you?” Lance asked, turning his head towards Shiro. “I’ve been trying to figure it out but it’s not working.”

He felt Shiro’s fingers tighten slightly. It was no secret to him that Shiro wasn’t exactly all for the idea of Lance still piloting the Blue Lion, but what choice did they have? Lance was still alive and Blue had roared oppressively when Shiro suggested that they find a new paladin. Blue was even averse to letting Allura pilot her, and that was saying something.

Shiro took a deep breath. “I trusted my lion to guide me.”

Lance’s jaw dropped. “That’s it?”

Through the hand on his shoulder, Lance felt Shiro shrug. “That’s it. We know the Blue Lion and you are both very trusting, it’s your natures. But I trust everything to my lion, she will get me out of situations in ways that I won’t think of.”

“But I do trust Blue!”

“I know you do, Lance. We all trust our lions, but it’s whether or not you trust her enough to see through her.”

Lance ducked his head and chewed on his lip more. Of course he trusted Blue, she was constant just like Hunk has been throughout his whole life. She comforted him when he couldn’t go to anyone else. She cared. She loved him. And he felt that same way towards her. He wouldn’t trade his lion for the world, not even being top of the class at the Garrison to lord it over Keith. He was proud to be the Blue Paladin of Voltron, he was proud to pilot the Blue Lion, and she was proud to have him. They worked, they clicked in ways that Lance never thought he would click with anyone or anything.

Shiro squeezed his shoulder. “Give it another shot, but Lance…”

He shrugged Shiro's hand off. Guess that hasn't changed. "I'm not giving up, Shiro. I’m going to pilot the Blue Lion.”

Lance spun on his heel and walked away from Voltron’s head, hand trailing along the wall to guide him. He was going to get this. Blue rumbled reassuringly in the back of his mind, guiding him to her. Looked like it was going to be another day spent in her hangar.

Hours passed and nothing. Absolutely nothing. Blue was there and not there at the same time and Lance hadn't felt this frustrated since struggling to become a fighter pilot – something he never really achieved but surpassed by becoming a paladin.

He thrust the controls away from him and pounded his fists on the armrests of his seat.

“Come on, Blue! Help me out here, what am I doing wrong?” he asked to the air. “Why can’t we get this!?”

His lion purred sympathetically, wrapping around him like a comfort blanket. He was so close to breaking down again. He’s missed the team training again, and lunch, and a meeting that Allura wanted to hold. Lance had ignored the call in favor of figuring out this damned ability with his lion. A fat lot of good that did.

He slumped in his seat and let out a rush of air. The inky black that surrounded him was oppressive, a constant reminder that he would amount to nothing. Not a fighter pilot, and now not even a paladin of Voltron. If he couldn’t figure this out, there was no point in keeping him here on the team. He couldn’t help Coran fix that ship, he couldn’t pilot the ship either since it was a job for Allura. He couldn’t fight. He couldn’t analyze data. He couldn’t even cook.

So what good was he?

Lance ran a hand down his face. The darkness crowded closer and if it was even possible, it felt thicker.

Yeah, he wasn’t worth much. Just a hindrance now.

Blue growled at him and pushed against his mind. She shoved images in his head: him making the team laugh, him consoling Hunk when things got too much, him helping Pidge as best as he can with her tech, him saving Coran, and finally, him shooting down all those Galra on the mission that cost him his sight. Each shot saving Keith and Pidge.

You are valuable she was trying to tell him.

Tears pricked his eyes and he stifled a small hiccup. “Thanks, Blue.”

She rumbled again, sounding so much like his mother scolding him for not believing in himself.

But once the feelings started, they were hard to stop. The darkness he was surrounded him felt wet, as much as Blue could tell him that he was needed and wanted as much as she wanted, he still couldn’t fight the feeling of being overlooked and shoved aside because he wasn’t useful.

Shiro’s words echoed in his head. Trust your lion.

He slid further down the chair, slouching heavily. “I don’t get it, Blue. I trust you, I trust you with my life and then some. I know you wouldn’t have chosen me if there wasn't something you saw in me. But I still don't get it."

He heard the hangar door swish open – the one leading outside, to the inky blackness filled with stars and planets and asteroids.

“Blue?” Panic shot through him and he grabbed at the controls. “Blue, you can’t – I can't! I can't see anymore, what if – what if we run into something!"

Blue growled, sounding like she was rolling her eyes and launched herself out of the castle.

“BLUE!” Lance screamed, pulling at the controls to pull her to a stop.

She kept going. His lion revved up her engines and the g-forces forced him into his seat. Lance grit his teeth and gripped the controls harder, pulling them back so much that he nearly touched the armrests of his chair.

What felt like light-years later, Blue finally stopped and Lance found his breath. He leaned forward over his knees and heaved air in and out of his lungs.

“Blue, where are we?”

His dashboard pinged and he knew coordinates were displayed. He groaned and sat up, tossing his head back. Since he was alone, he blinked his eyes open. His sight still revealed nothing, it wasn’t even a shade lighter with his eyes open.

Blue rumbled, telling him to lower his head and face forward. She was being extra bossy today, something she had to have picked up from Red over the last ten thousand years. Lance closed his eyes again, not like keeping them open was doing anything.

His lion growled, feeding him vague instructions just like the first time he flew her. Slow your breathing, open your mind, and trust me.

If he was being honest, he was ecstatic that he was out of the castle for once, and flying Blue again was his dream but the situation had him on edge. Never had Blue done something on her own before – not like how the black and green lions protecting Shiro and Pidge from that Robeast crash landing on Arus, and definitely not like Red launching herself after Keith every time he ejected himself into space.

No, Blue and Yellow never acted out like the other lions. Then again, their paladins rarely got into serious trouble without anyone else there to help them.

The Blue Lion roared at him sharply, almost bark, and it forced Lance to focus his mind back on what she told him to do. He took multiple deep breaths, calming himself. It felt just like when had those mind-melding exercises and he found himself slipping into his meditative state. Blue purred approvingly. She knew her paladin was capable, he just needed to be pushed in the right direction sometimes.

Slowly, the farther and farther Lance fell into meditation, his mind opened. He welcomed Blue into his mind. She curled around him and spun his mind around, aligning it with hers.

Open your eyes.

Lance opened his eyes.