#song is hold it in by jukebox the ghost

[moraymoth]

Sorry I really haven’t been drawing; been growing through something lately that Idunno what’s happening. I hope doodles are okay for now, I will try my best to post when I’m feeling it!

[cricket-teeeth]

omg i drew something other than a headshot for once

also here’s the face cause i’m proud of the details 💪💪💪

[soursherbat]

Sensation; Chapter 3

Hold It In

To start from the beginning Click Here ; Previous chapter Click Here

A Springtrap x OC fanfic

Word Count; 2,903

I couldn't let him stay like this a moment longer, especially not while he was staying in my home. The awful people running that attraction may have been content to let him smell like mildew and rot in filth, but I refused to allow that to happen.

I’d been rummaging through my closet for a little bit now, going through old boxes trying to find my carpet cleaner to clean up this poor raggedy rabbit sitting sadly in my kitchen.

He looks so lost right now, every time I would look at him he’d just be staring off into space, probably trying to ground himself.

I could understand the struggle he was having. Nobody walks out of a situation like his unscathed. He seemed to be handling it better than I thought he would, I start to wonder if there’s anything I can do to soothe his nerves.

Well, cleaning his fur would definitely be a start. He seemed fidgety around water though, I’d need to be careful. I finally find something I can use to wash him off, pulling my old handheld steam cleaner from one of the dusty boxes.

It should work, I’d used it to clean my large stuffed animals that couldn’t be thrown in the washing machine. After pushing a stupid joke about whether or not Springtrap would be machine washable or not out of my mind, I put the box back and exit the small closet, closing the door as I turn back to Springtrap.

He’s staring at me, or... through me, it seems. His eyes slowly making their way up to mine, widening a bit when he realizes what he was doing. He simply looks away, and I couldn’t tell if he was embarrassed or not.

I don’t push it, simply filling the steamer with water and plugging it into the wall, sitting it on my kitchen table as we waited for it to heat up. I hoped it wouldn’t hurt him, though... would he even be able to feel me cleaning him?

It seemed like he responded to my touch on that first night when I’d attempted to push him away, and any time he saw my hands reach toward him he’d act like a sad kitten that was desperate to be pet.

I had to scrub the grime off of my hands after touching him the first time, so I wasn’t exactly ecstatic about the idea of petting him at the moment. Once his fur didn’t stick to my hands, then I’d be happy to give him any care he needed.

I especially understood his need for attention. I’d been living alone for so long, or with others but still incredibly isolated- I was desperate for someone to fill the void. The loneliness, the empty feeling... it had been getting to me lately.

I don’t realize that I’m now staring at him until he looks back at me, tilting his head curiously.

“Is there something on your mind?”

I chuckle sheepishly, casting my eyes down to the floor.

“Well... nothing, really. Just... happy to have someone else here with me.”

He seems shocked, his eyes wide as he processes my words. I barely even register that I’d said it, not even realizing how it might make him feel. I mean... he was definitely having a rough time, and to have someone show this much care and attention to him after decades of isolation must be jarring.

“Ah... sorry. Just not used to having a roommate.”

His face softens a bit, and he offers me a sympathetic smile.

“I’m not either.”

I can’t help but laugh a little, nodding at his statement. We were both out of our element here, it was going to be awkward at first. I’m sure neither of us were much for small talk.

He seems to be more alert when I talk to him, maybe it was just having something to listen to keeping him from dissociating as badly. I look at the steam cleaner, noticing that it’s started to steam a little bit.

I take it into my hand, standing in front of him with it in clear view. He’s sitting at eye level with me, my chair looking so small compared to him.

“I’m going to try to clean your fur with it now, okay? Just let me know if it’s uncomfortable.”

I give him a warning before I start to move my arm toward him, feeling a twinge of guilt when he flinches away from me, shaking his head slowly.

“No- no, no- Hawk, I can’t do this-”

I don’t stop until it’s pressed against his arm, and as he reaches for my wrist to stop me, he freezes. Nothing happens when I touch it to his grimy fur, aside from the water inside the steamer beginning to turn a deep shade of reddish-brown.

“Oh...”

He’s watching me curiously as I slowly move it down, the fur underneath it turning a golden shade of yellow. I knew this was a Spring Bonnie suit- but I’d honestly forgotten he wasn’t supposed to be green.

“That feels... lovely...”

He’s purring now, visibly relaxing against the back of the chair. He closes his eyes and lets out a sigh of contentment, forcing a smile from me.

He’s just so cute when he’s like this, he looks so calm right now. I look back down at what I’m doing, not wanting to accidentally shove the steamer into a hole and damage his internal workings further.

I’m feeling conflicted again. I knew I had attachment issues- specifically that I get overly attached very quickly... latching onto a person to feel less alone- but this felt different. It didn’t feel like mere infatuation, and it's scaring me so badly.

Could he feel the same way? Would he feel the same way, if I did ask him? And- if he said he did- would he just be telling me what I want to hear in fear of me throwing him out?

That last option makes my stomach twist into knots. I decided I’d keep it to myself- feeling stupid for even considering the notion. I mean, why would he want me anyway? I’m anxious and awkward, overly clingy and desperate for attention- not to mention the fact that I was openly terrified of him when we first met.

I felt my heart sink as I thought of that. Did he still think I was scared of him? I hope not- surely he knew that if I was going through such lengths for him that I had to care for him in some type of way.

I stop to consider how he might be feeling, wondering in the back of my mind if he’s having the same conflict that I am. He frets over me like a doting parent, but he was obviously apprehensive to let me close to him.

I knew he felt like a monster, likely struggling with feelings of self loathing and depreciation. I didn’t see him like that, though- and I was pretty sure he knew that. It was so hard to tell what he was thinking...

He’s enjoying having his fur deep cleaned, feeling the years of caked on blood and dirt wash away like nothing had happened in the first place. He stared at the darkening water inside the machine, an intense sensation of relief hitting him hard as the decades of filth was rinsed off.

This was real. I was real. He couldn’t believe that someone had seen him for what he was right now- and still had the kindness to take him out of that situation to give him a home. The fact that I was going this far to help him made his head spin.

Perhaps he wasn’t as incapable of moving forward as he thought. He might be able to do this, to live again... with me. The idea made him smile, feeling a strange sense of satisfaction when he considered it.

There was no way he could tell me about his complicated feelings. There’s no possibility in his head that I’d ever feel anything more than platonic for him- and honestly, as long as he got to be near me he was more than happy to just exist in my vicinity.

He wasn’t even sure if he really felt that way for me, or if it was just his emotions getting him in over his head and attaching himself to the first person who showed him positive attention.

Whatever he felt- whatever I felt for him- he just wanted the best for me. He wasn’t concerned for himself at this point, he trusted that my care for him would be more than he could ever ask for. But in my case? He worried that caring for an eight foot tall half-animatronic man might cause issues.

“Are... are you sure about this, Hawk?”

Springtrap’s words catch my attention, not realizing that I’d been spacing out as I was washing his fur. I look up at him, seeing the concern for me evident on his face.

“I don’t think I would have done any of this if I was unsure. Don’t worry about me.”

My answer seems to quell some of his anxieties, as he sits back in the chair once more, watching my hand move the steamer on the final patch of fur visible to me on his body.

“I’ll need you to stand up.”

He does as requested without protest, even turning around for me. Luckily I was able to get his shoulders with the first pass, otherwise I wouldn’t be able to reach them now.

We’re both silent as I do this, too caught up in our thoughts to speak any of them out loud. I still can’t tell what he’s thinking, his face was so surprisingly expressive- but he was hard to figure out.

It was likely the same struggle for him. My face had a stoicism to it that betrayed my internal feelings, a struggle I’d faced for as long as I could remember. Of course I could emote, and did so frequently- but my spacey nature made it difficult to discern my emotions from an outsider’s perspective most of the time.

“Hawk... thank you for this. I... I cannot fully express how much I appreciate it.”

He sounds so earnest, his polite formalities growing on me quickly. He was just so adorable, his sad little face and warbling voice drawing sympathy from me easily.

“You’re welcome... I’m glad it’s not uncomfortable.”

“This is the best I’ve felt in years.”

That tugs on my heartstrings even further. It fills me with joy to hear that, almost feeling bad when I have to turn off the steam cleaner.

“There we go... almost done. Please, sit- I need to get your face...”

He complies, while I empty out the disgustingly dirty water from the cleaner. It’s turned black- I can’t even imagine how he must feel now that all that caked on muck was gone. I get a soft rag and some conditioner, the only scent in my house being citrus.

Ah, well. It kinda fit him with his fur being yellow I suppose. I’d gotten the rag wet with warm water, and filled a small bowl for me to rinse it with. I applied a generous amount of conditioner, looking into his eyes as I held the soap covered rag in my hands.

“I’m... gonna have to hold your face. Tell me if you want me to stop...”

He simply nods- very eagerly, might I add- as I reach up and cup his face, holding him still as I gently scrub the grunge from his dirty fur. He’s looking away from me when I look him in the eye... but when I look away, I can swear I see him staring at me from the corner of my eye.

If he is, he’s very careful to look away when I focus back on him. Maybe he’s just embarrassed about it, but... there’s a lonely, desperate look in his eyes.

He’s trying to hide it with his smile, but I can see through it. I can recognize it- having seen it in my own face many times in the mirror.

It makes me curious. Is he looking at me? And- if so, why with that look? God- I wish I knew what he was thinking.

As I’m working on his face, I notice his eyes widen and his body visibly stiffen. I hear a small jingling noise, followed by a very soft ‘mew’ from the floor.

I look down, seeing that my cat Sunny has finally woken up and come to say hello. He’s purring and rubbing his body back and forth across Springtrap’s legs, probably enjoying the soft fur of the suit against his own.

“Aww... I think he likes you too.”

I realize what I’d said the moment it leaves my mouth. Springtrap obviously noticed too- his eyes snapping directly to mine, curiosity plainly displayed on his face.

He says nothing about it though, simply purring louder as my... our? Our cat shows him some affection. I try not to say anything stupid and make it worse, choosing silence instead as I rinse the rag and finish up cleaning his suit.

The cat probably thinks he’s just a large stuffed animal, as he’s not showing any aggression toward this towering machine now sitting in our kitchen. In fact, he jumps up onto Springtrap’s lap, meowing loudly as he begged to be pet.

“I think he’s jealous that you’re getting all of my attention.”

I chuckle softly, tossing the blackened rag into the bowl of soiled water. I run my hands through the fur of his face, making sure there was no more matting or tangled tufts of fur.

He’s closed his eyes again, his purring so intense I can hear loose metallic bits inside of him rattling against his chassis. Sunny begins to purr as well- and when I look down, I see that Springtrap is petting him very slowly. Likely afraid to hurt the small creature...

If I wasn’t endeared to this rabbit already, I certainly was now. The gentle care he showed this animal was so controlled and calm- I could tell he had been a cat person before his ordeal, from the way he handled him.

I pull my hands away from his face, though... it’s very reluctantly. I’m not sure if he picks up on that when he opens his eyes, looking disappointed that I’d stopped.

“I just need to wash my hands.”

He softens when he hears that. continuing to gently pet and scratch the eager feline happily laying in his lap. He looks down at Sunny, smiling when the cat rubs his cheeks hard enough against his ragged hand that its silly little face stretches a bit.

It... it feels humanizing, to have an animal approach him like he was just another person. He studies the creature, before perking up at the sound of my footsteps approaching.

“You don’t need to keep sitting there if you don’t want to, I can’t imagine that chair being comfortable for you.”

“... But, then I would have to move him.”

I feel like I’ve been shot through the heart. I just smile, reaching up and gently scratching behind Springtrap’s ears. The gesture earns me a pleasant little noise from him, obviously making him happy.

“He’s used to it, trust me. You can move him.”

He stays there, though- obviously not wanting to disturb the feline that’s now rolling around on his lap. He ends up jumping down by himself in the end, and I swear I see Springtrap’s ears droop sadly when he does.

I keep calling him Springtrap, but I know that’s not his name. I wondered if he might be more willing to tell it to me now that he was sure I wouldn’t judge him- but at the same time I wasn’t willing to push the issue.

He stands up, politely pushing in the chair he’d been sitting in. He then turns to me, a look on his face I can’t discern.

Before I can ask if he’s okay, I’m suddenly pulled up into a tight hug. It’s shockingly gentle- but it surprised me and made me panic. I push away instinctively, letting out a frightened gasp involuntarily as my face twists with horror.

He puts me down immediately, shrinking away from me like he’d just been shot. I immediately feel a knife twisting the feeling of guilt and regret into my heart, my lips pursing as I watch him immediately try to backpedal.

“I... I’m so sorry. I- I don’t-”

I cut him off with a hug in return, just barely able to fully wrap my arms around his body as I hold him against me, his fur now pleasant and soft to the touch. He’s obviously caught off guard, getting mixed signals from my reactions here.

“No... don’t- don’t apologize... I just...”

I can’t explain it to him. It’s still painful to dredge up those old memories, even with my desperation for human contact I was still terrified of being touched so suddenly.

“I just need a warning next time... not your fault.”

He exhales shakily, slowly wrapping his arms back around me. He has to lean over to hug me, reminding me of how tiny I am in his eyes.

“Of course... I apologize, Hawk-”

“You didn’t know.”

I don’t want to talk about it any further than that. We stand there quietly embracing each other for a long time, my face pressed firmly against his fur. He seems to understand my apprehension, dropping the issue entirely.

“Thank you, Hawk... I... I cannot repay your kindness.”

“You being here is more than enough.”

Next Chapter ->

[pityroadart]

Here's my piece for the @mcspirkevents Big Bang! I was paired with the excellent @twinkboimler and their fic Jim Kirk's Guide to Delivering the Goods, which you can find here (E, AOS McSpirk, 60k)

Summer just started, and Jim is bored out of his mind. The courses he needs to take aren’t being offered until the second half of the summer, so he has an entire month to bother his roommate Bones. At Bones’ suggestion to get a job, Jim fixes up a motorbike and starts making deliveries to people in town, including a cute Vulcan professor named Spock. But when Jim is beaten up while making a delivery, it’s Spock who delivers Jim back to the apartment he shares with Bones. After the meet-cute from hell, Spock and Bones start dating… and so do Jim and Spock. With neither roommate aware they’re both dating the same man, there’s only so long that things can go well for them before the other shoe finally drops.

Also as part of my Big Bang offerings, I made a fic playlist (below) — partly a love letter to McSpirk, partly a love letter to myself and Fletcher's overlapping music taste.

Thank you again to Fletcher @twinkboimler for working on this project with me, it's been an absolute joy!

Until the Birds Return on Spotify

Tracks and choice lyrics below the cut (contains vague spoilers):

Astronaut | Future Crib

I wanna be an astronaut Fly into space I wanna see Mars from Venus I wanna go to that place And if you come with me They'll be room in my ship I'll take you up there with me It can be just you and me

Afraid of Heights | boygenius

I never rode a motorcycle I never smoked a cigarette I wanna live a vibrant life But I wanna die a boring death

Day by Day | Old Sea Brigade

Time and time again, I think I'm falling through space And I wake up in my bed just sweating in sheets

... Then I think of you growing old and it breaks my heart

Factories | Autoheart

When you found my body by the lake You wasn't sure if I was still alive

You and Your Friend | Snake River Conspiracy

Must we go run through our lives with our eyes closed To the loving happiness that we can share I think I'm in love with you and your friend

My Gal, My Guy | Darlingside

My (guy) he's the bluest ocean, (he) Waits under the bluest sky for me I belong to (him) When I'm in the water

Santa Fe | Autoheart

Heaven sent You were like a present I should not have kept A sticker on your forehead saying 'breakable And I broke you bad

Coat on a Hook | The National

Two days, we're still not talking You're the opposite of an open book Come back for me

Top to Toe | Fenne Lily

So I'm changing all my days To make your nights It's just not right

Pigeon Song | Patrick Wolf

Now the pigeons gather 'round my feeding hand And we talk 'til the evening fades I have learnt how it goes What you wait for never shows And what you least wanted, holds you down like a stone

Hornets | The National

But I don't wanna leave And I don't wanna hide I just don't wanna run Into you tonight

Tea, Milk & Honey | Oh Pep!

If you stick with me, I'll make sure your time is all right If you don't understand where I am now, it's better if we leave it

The Spiritual | Jukebox the Ghost

We might have kissed a bit too soon I could feel what was coming and I didn't mean to hurry you I just knew that time would find our fingers linked, through and through Forgive me, I'm human too

Bike Dream | Rostam

Two boys, one to kiss your neck And one to bring you breakfast Get you out of bed

Don't Go | Yazoo

Can't stop now Don't you know I ain't never gonna let you go

Jenny | The Mountain Goats

I hopped on back of the bike, wrapped my arms around you I sank my face into your hair And then I inhaled as deeply as I possibly could You were sweet and delicious as the warm desert air And you pointed your headlamp toward the horizon We were the one thing in the galaxy God didn't have his eyes on 900 cc's of raw whining power, no outstanding warrants for my arrest

Old Old Fashioned | Josh Ritter (Frightened Rabbit cover)

Oh let's get old fashioned Back to how things used to be If I get old, old fashioned Would you get old, old fashioned with me?

[lila-lou]

✨High School Sweetheart - Pt 1✨

Summary: You come face-to-face with a ghost from your past—Dean Winchester. Five years after he vanished from your life without a word, and now he´s here. But neither you nor he are teenagers anymore.

-Listen to "Chance with you"-

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warnings: Language, ANGST, Fluff, John being a dick

Word Count: 5697

A/N: English isn’t my first language, please be lenient. 💙

The air in the bar felt thick, heavy with the scent of spiced cider and a faint edge of old whiskey, blending into the murmur of low conversations and a crackling rock song on the jukebox. You’d come here tonight for a quiet drink, something to chase away the chill of early autumn and the memories that always seemed to creep up on you this time of year. But all thoughts of peace vanished the moment you saw him.

Dean Winchester.

He was older, his jawline sharper, more rugged than you remembered. But it was him, sitting across the bar, just as cocky and self-assured as he’d been five years ago. He was laughing at something, a low, rough laugh, and you could just make out his voice. Next to him was a younger guy with shaggy hair—his little brother, you guessed. The kid was a bit taller than you’d imagined, but something in the way Dean looked at him told you it had to be Sam.

Five years.

It had been five years since Dean Winchester had walked out of your life, without so much as a word or even a backward glance.

Three months was all it had taken for him to slip past your defenses, just long enough to make you feel something real—just long enough for him to break your heart.

You’d told yourself you’d moved on, but now, seeing him here, you weren’t so sure.

You didn’t know if you were more shocked or furious. What the hell was he doing here, sitting at the bar in your town, like he hadn’t left a storm behind him? You felt your hands curl into fists at your sides, trying to keep your breathing steady as you watched him lean into his conversation, completely unaware of your presence.

You clenched your fists tighter, the old hurt and bitterness simmering to the surface. Five years might as well have been five days with the way the memories rushed back.

Dean had been your first everything—first real crush, first kiss, first love, first time.

He had a way of making you feel like you were the only person in the world, like nothing else mattered when you were together. But then, without so much as a word, he was gone. Left you staring at empty halls, his laugh an echo that haunted you long after he disappeared. You’d never gotten an answer, just silence.

And now, here he was, like some ghost from a past you’d never properly buried.

Taking a steadying breath, you pushed away the hesitation. You weren’t a teenager anymore; you deserved answers. And damn it, he needed to know that some things didn’t just disappear.

You took another step forward, just enough for him to catch sight of you from the corner of his eye. His head turned, and when he saw you, his face went slack with surprise, the hint of a smile fading as quickly as it had come. His green eyes—those same ones that had once looked at you like you were his whole world—widened slightly.

“(Y/N)?”, he said, your name a quiet murmur, almost like a question, as though he couldn’t believe it was really you.

The casual surprise in his tone snapped something inside you. For a second, you just stared back, holding his gaze, letting him feel every bit of anger that had built up over the years.

“Surprised?”, you asked, letting a little edge slip into your voice. “You look pretty good for a ghost, Winchester”.

He blinked, the surprise melting into something else—guilt, maybe, or regret, though he tried to hide it quickly behind that familiar cocky smirk. But it didn’t reach his eyes, and you could see he was still searching for the right words, like he hadn’t quite prepared for this confrontation.

“Didn’t think I’d run into anyone from back then”, he finally said, a little hesitant, his voice quieter than usual.

“Back then?”, you laughed, but there was no humor in it. “You mean five years ago, when you left without a word? Disappeared like none of it mattered?”.

His expression softened, and he glanced away, jaw tightening. “Look, (Y/N), it’s… it’s complicated”.

You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms as you looked Dean up and down, letting the silence settle between you. The discomfort in his face was almost satisfying, but it didn’t ease the ache in your chest. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Sam giving you a small, awkward wave, clearly recognizing you too. He looked between you and Dean, shifting on his feet.

“Uh, yeah… I, um, need to use the restroom”, Sam mumbled, flashing an apologetic smile before slipping away, clearly eager to avoid whatever confrontation was brewing between you and his brother.

“Complicated”, you repeated, letting the word hang heavy between you. “That’s all you’ve got after all this time?”.

He flinched, looking up to meet your eyes, and for the first time, you saw something raw there, a vulnerability he hadn’t let you see back then.

“(Y/N), I know it sounds like an excuse”, he began, his voice dropping low, careful, like he didn’t want anyone to overhear what he was about to say. “But I had no choice. My dad… he needed me, and we had a job to do. I couldn’t stay, couldn’t keep you in that mess”.

You scoffed, trying to brush off the way his words still managed to stir something deep inside you, that same helpless longing you’d tried so hard to bury. “Right”, you mumbled, voice thick with the bitterness you’d been carrying. “So you just left, thinking it’d be better for me. Meanwhile, I was left to… to deal with the fact that I fell for you, Dean. Fell hard, too”.

He looked up, his expression softening with surprise and guilt, but you pressed on, feeling the words rush out, bitter and relentless.

“You waltzed in, got under my skin, made me believe… Fuck. I was such an idiot”. You shook your head, feeling the sting of it, years after you’d tried to laugh it off, to forget. “Every guy after you didn’t stand a chance, you know that? No one ever got close because, no matter what I told myself, I couldn’t get you out of my head. You twisted me up so bad in those few weeks, like some lovesick kid, just waiting for someone who never even bothered to say goodbye”.

Dean’s shoulders dropping slightly as he listened, as if your words were pressing down on him. He didn’t look away, though—he let you speak, let you throw every hurt and frustration at him without backing down. When you finally stopped, breath catching in your throat, he exhaled, like he was trying to find something, anything, to say that might make this better.

“(Y/N)”, he started, voice rough. “You don’t know how many times I wanted to come back, to give you some kind of answer. But I knew if I did, I wouldn’t be able to leave again. And my life, this life I was born into… it wasn’t fair to pull you into it. It wasn’t fair to you”.

You shook your head, fighting the sting of tears, refusing to let him see just how deep this still hurt. “So you just decided for me? Dean, I’m not some fragile thing. I could’ve handled it”.

Dean sighed heavily, his gaze dropping to the floor as he rubbed the back of his neck, frustration and regret etched into his face. “Hell, (Y/N), you were only sixteen at the time. Sixteen. You were… you were just a kid. You wouldn't have been able to handle it”, he murmured, the words coming out almost reluctantly, like admitting them hurt as much as hearing them.

Your voice came out sharper than you intended, laced with every bit of bitterness and hurt you’d kept buried for years. “What, old enough to get fucked but not old enough to be talked to?”.

Dean flinched, the words hitting him like a slap. For a second, he didn’t look up, the guilt and shame clear on his face as he shifted uncomfortably, searching for the right words. “That… that’s not what I wanted it to be”, he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. “I never wanted you to feel used, like it didn’t mean anything. Because it did… you meant something to me, (Y/N). More than I knew how to handle back then”.

Dean took a deep breath, his gaze shifting to the floor again as he struggled with words he couldn’t seem to say. The regret was clear in his eyes, the weight of things left unsaid hanging heavy between you.

You could almost see the thoughts playing out in his mind, the memories stirring. Back then, you’d been the only girl to ever make him feel something real—something beyond the easy, shallow hookups he’d drowned himself in afterward. Every girl since had been nothing more than a distraction, a way to bury the ache that losing you had left behind. But with you… it had always been different. You were the one he could never quite forget.

But none of that slipped past his lips. Instead, he stood there, wrestling with the weight of his own silence, unable to give you the honesty you deserved. Maybe he feared it would only hurt you more, or maybe he knew that nothing he said would make this right.

Finally, he looked up, his gaze meeting yours with a quiet, almost desperate plea. “You’re right. You deserved so much better than what I gave you. I thought about coming back more times than I can count. Thought about finding you, explaining… But every time, I stopped myself. Figured you’d moved on, that you were happier without me dragging you down. And… I was scared”. He laughed softly, bitterly. “I was scared of exactly this. Of seeing how much I’d hurt you”.

His words hit you like a wave, but you kept your expression steady, refusing to let the hurt show again.

You sighed, feeling the weight of all those years settle in your chest, a bittersweet ache you’d learned to live with but never really let go of. “I thought so highly of you back then, Dean”, you murmured, a hint of bitterness creeping into your tone. “I guess I was just a stupid little girl, thinking you were… I don’t know, some kind of hero”.

Your gaze flickered over him, taking in the familiar jawline, the strong shoulders, the way he still carried himself with that careless confidence. He looked so much the same that it hurt—like no time had passed at all, like he hadn’t been the ghost haunting your memories, the person you’d tried to convince yourself you were over. And yet, here he was, just as handsome, and the old ache you thought you’d buried crept back in, uninvited and relentless.

Dean looked away, swallowing hard, like your words struck something raw in him. When he met your eyes again, he looked almost small, a shadow of the confident guy you’d known, as if every regret he carried had finally caught up to him.

“You weren’t stupid, (Y/N)”, he said quietly, his voice barely more than a whisper. “You saw something in me I couldn’t see in myself. And maybe I didn’t deserve it. Hell, I know I didn’t. But you were never stupid for believing in me. You were… you were just too good for someone like me. Still are”.

The honesty in his voice was like a knife, cutting through every defense you’d built. You’d wanted him to admit what he’d done, to see how he’d hurt you, but hearing it now, hearing him lay it out in plain words, didn’t bring the satisfaction you’d imagined. It only left a hollow ache where your anger had been.

Dean watched you, his gaze softening as the anger in your eyes began to fade, replaced by something quieter, more vulnerable. You’d spent years thinking he was just another guy who wanted what he could get and didn’t care who he hurt to get it. A fling, a mistake, a heartbreak that was yours alone to carry. But as you looked at him now, the regret in his face, the years of silence suddenly seemed to make a little more sense. Maybe it hadn’t been so simple after all.

You could almost see him back then, barely nineteen, just a kid himself, weighed down by responsibilities he never asked for.

-Flashback-

The sun was barely breaking over the horizon that day, casting a dim light across the worn-down motel room they’d been staying in for the past weeks. Dean had just started to drift back to sleep after another restless night when he heard his dad. He groaned, barely cracking his eyes open as his dad’s voice cut through the motel room.

“Dean! Get your ass up, we’re moving out in ten!”.

Dean shot up, a surge of panic replacing the sleep in his veins. “What? Now?”, he mumbled, scrambling out of bed, his heart sinking. They weren’t supposed to leave this town for at least a few more days—long enough for him to say goodbye, to figure out how to explain things to you without breaking every promise he’d made. Long enough to try to leave things right, to tell you why he couldn’t stay.

But John was already packing, barely glancing at him as he tossed weapons into duffel bags, his movements efficient, mechanical. “Got a new job lined up. No time to waste”. He gave Dean a hard look, that unyielding gaze Dean knew better than to question. “You knew we wouldn’t be here forever, son. It’s time to go”.

Dean swallowed hard, dread clawing at him as he glanced over at Sam, who was shoving his clothes into a bag, already resigned to the drill of their lives, even at fifteen. But this time, leaving didn’t feel like any of the others.

He’d thought he had more time with you. Thought maybe he’d found something real, something worth hanging onto, in the middle of all this chaos. He thought maybe you’d understand, maybe you’d wait. Or at least, that he could tell you the truth. That you were more than a distraction from a life that had always felt too heavy for him.

Dean swallowed hard, his jaw tightening as he tried to gather the courage to push back, to buy himself just a little more time. He cast a quick glance at his dad, trying to keep his tone casual, like it was no big deal.

“Can’t we at least wait until tomorrow? There’s… there’s something I need to take care of”, he mumbled, hoping that his dad might, for once, let him have this.

But John scoffed, barely pausing in his packing as he tossed another weapon into the duffel. “A thing to take care of?”. He looked up, his mouth twisting into a bitter, sarcastic grin. “Let me guess… that girl. The one who’s got you sneaking around like some lovesick little puppy”.

Dean shifted uncomfortably, his heart sinking as he caught the mocking gleam in his father’s eyes. “It’s not like that”, he said, though even he could hear the weak protest in his voice.

“Sure it isn’t”. John’s voice dripped with sarcasm as he shook his head, chuckling darkly. “You think I don’t know what you’re up to, Dean? I told you weeks ago to cut ends with her. You think this life has room for little Miss Perfect? Some snob who thinks she’s too good for all of this?”.

Dean clenched his fists, his pulse racing as he fought the urge to defend you, to say that you weren’t like that—that you weren’t some spoiled girl who thought herself better than their life. But he knew better than to argue. He’d heard this tone before, the edge that warned him that any pushback would only make things worse.

John went on, shaking his head with an incredulous laugh. “Can’t believe you’re even thinking about her right now. Thought I raised you better than that, son. No girl—especially not some high school princess—is worth dragging yourself through the mud for. What, you think you stand a chance of keeping her? That she’d stick around if she knew the real you? Give me a damn break”.

Dean’s face burned with anger and shame, his heart twisting at the casual cruelty in his father’s voice. He wanted to yell, to tell him that you weren’t just some fling, that you mattered. But every instinct he’d been raised with told him to keep his mouth shut, to hold his feelings tight, because showing them would only lead to disappointment, to the same disapproval he’d grown up under.

John’s gaze hardened, his expression turning cold as he looked Dean up and down, unimpressed. “Get your head out of the clouds, Dean. No piece of ass is worth it, and I’ll tell you right now—no girl’s worth going soft for. Not in this life. So pack up, and let’s go. You’re not risking everything just because you’re chasing after some girl who doesn’t belong here”.

Dean felt a sting in his chest, a hollow ache settling in as he fought to keep his expression steady, to hide just how much those words hurt. In that moment, he realized that arguing would only make things worse, that his dad would never understand. So he swallowed the hurt, burying it as he always did, and forced himself to keep his voice steady, distant.

“Yes, sir”, he muttered, voice barely more than a whisper, feeling the words settle like stones in his gut. He didn’t look up as he zipped his duffel bag shut, his throat tight as he wrestled with the urge to run out the door, to find you, to tell you goodbye.

But he stayed. He let his father’s words sink in, let them mold around his heart like armor. And when he finally climbed into the Impala, eyes fixed on the road ahead, he forced himself to believe what John had said—that you’d be better off without him, that whatever you’d shared was only a distraction from a life he’d never be free from.

As they pulled out of town, he forced himself not to look back, to focus on the road, on the only life he’d ever known. But the image of you, the sound of your laughter, the warmth you’d brought to his life lingered in his mind, haunting him like a ghost he’d never truly escape.

-End of the flashback-

Dean’s eyes flickered back up to you, and you could see the anger and disappointment simmering there, shadows of the memories that had clearly never left him. His father’s words, that hard, dismissive scorn, lingered in the depths of his gaze, and for a moment, you caught a glimpse of the pain he’d buried all those years ago.

“I wanted to say goodbye”, he mumbled, almost to himself, the words barely making it past his lips. There was a heaviness in his tone, the regret palpable, and for a brief moment, he looked like that nineteen-year-old kid again, held back by forces he’d been powerless to resist.

Without another word, he drained the rest of his whiskey, his fingers tightening around the glass before he set it down. Then, with a quiet sigh, he rose to his feet, pulling his jacket on, the same guarded, closed-off look returning to his face. You felt the ache in your chest deepen as he moved, like he was preparing to leave you behind all over again.

He took a long breath, his gaze drifting over you, lingering in a way that seemed almost painful for him. You could see the conflict in his eyes, a war waging between the urge to stay and the instinct to leave—to protect you from the life he couldn’t escape. Even after all these years, there was something raw and vulnerable in the way he looked at you, as if seeing you now hurt just as much as leaving you had.

You saw his eyes trace over your face, lingering for a moment too long, taking you in as if trying to memorize you all over again. The softness in his gaze twisted something inside you, a reminder of what you’d once shared, of the way he’d looked at you when he thought no one else was watching.

“You know”, he said, his voice low, almost hesitant, “you’re still the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen”. He paused, catching himself, a bittersweet smile pulling at his lips. “Well… woman, by now”.

You felt your cheeks flush despite yourself, but you held his gaze, feeling the weight of his words, the years of unspoken things between you. It was the truth, you realized—the same honesty he’d kept hidden all those years ago. But there was a sadness there too, an ache that told you he didn’t think he could ever give you what you deserved.

“Dean”, you whispered, stepping closer, searching his face. “You don’t have to leave again".

He clenched his jaw, glancing away for a second, wrestling with himself, his hands clenching in the pockets of his jacket. “I want to stay. Hell, I want nothing more than to stay“.

Without thinking, Dean reached out, his hand warm as it cupped your face, his thumb brushing tenderly over your cheek. He held you like you were something fragile, something he was afraid to let go of but equally afraid to keep holding onto. His gaze softened, his voice dropping to a whisper, rough and broken. “But I do have to leave, sweetheart”, he murmured, almost like he was convincing himself. “I always have to leave”.

The word slipped from his lips, “sweetheart”, and in an instant, you were sixteen all over again.

-Flashback-

The rain had come out of nowhere, heavy drops pelting down in sheets, turning the quiet evening into a storm as you and Dean huddled under the diner’s awning, laughing as you watched the parking lot become a sea of puddles. He was supposed to be walking you home after sharing a couple of milkshakes and a basket of fries, each of you pretending it wasn’t a date but knowing it was.

The rain showed no signs of letting up, and Dean glanced down the street, then back at you, running a hand through his damp hair as he chuckled. “Guess that puts a dent in my plans of playing gentleman and walking you home”.

You smiled, half-shivering as the wind picked up. “I’d say your plans were doomed from the start”.

He laughed, that easy, genuine laugh you’d already grown to love in the few days you’d known him. Then his gaze shifted toward the motel just down the road, a short, drenched run from where you stood. He hesitated, as if deciding whether to risk suggesting it, then shrugged. “We’re just five minutes from where I’m staying… probably closer than your place. Why don’t we wait it out there? Just until the rain lets up”.

You nodded, feeling your cheeks warm despite the cold, and with that unspoken agreement, you broke into a run together, both of you soaked within seconds as you sprinted down the empty street. By the time you stumbled inside his dingy motel room, breathless and laughing, you were dripping wet, water pooling around your feet as you shook out your arms and tried to wring out your hair.

“Looks like we didn’t exactly outrun the storm”, you teased, brushing a strand of soaked hair from your face as you looked around the cramped room, your nerves setting in as the reality of being alone with him settled over you.

Dean grinned, pulling off his jacket and tossing it over a chair. His own hair was plastered to his forehead, and water dripped from the collar of his T-shirt, but he looked at you with that familiar, slightly mischievous gleam in his eyes. “Guess not. But you know, there are worse places to be”.

There was a pause, a stillness that settled between you, the laughter fading as you met his gaze, the dim light from the single lamp casting a soft glow over his face. You saw something shift in his expression, a quiet vulnerability that made your heart race as he took a hesitant step toward you.

Without thinking, you closed the distance, your breaths mingling as you both moved closer, the world outside the room slipping away. Dean’s hand lifted, his fingers tracing along your jawline, gentle but deliberate, like he was afraid of scaring you off. His thumb brushed over your cheek, leaving a trail of warmth that made you shiver, and he leaned in, his lips hovering just a breath away from yours.

“Is this okay?”, he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper, his gaze searching yours.

You nodded, too lost in the moment to speak, and that was all he needed.

He closed the gap, his lips meeting yours in a kiss that was soft, almost hesitant, like he was still holding back, afraid to take more than he was allowed. But as you melted into him, as your arms wrapped around his shoulders and his hand slipped to the small of your back, the kiss deepened, the world fading to nothing but the feel of him, the warmth of his touch.

His other hand tangled in your damp hair, pulling you closer as if he needed this as much as you did. The intensity of it surprised you, the way he kissed you like you were something he’d been searching for but hadn’t dared to hope he’d find. You felt every unspoken word, every promise he couldn’t make, in the way his hands held you, in the way his lips moved with yours.

When you finally broke apart, breathless and a little dazed, he looked at you with a softness you hadn’t seen before, a quiet reverence that made your heart ache. “You’re… something else, Sweetheart”, he murmured, his voice barely more than a whisper, a confession that felt like a secret he hadn’t meant to share.

The rain outside was forgotten, the cold fading as you looked at him, feeling, in that moment, that he was the only person in the world.

-End of the flashback-

The memory faded, but the feeling lingered, that same warmth flooding your chest even now, five years later. Standing here with him, his thumb brushing gently over your cheek, the years between you seemed to vanish, leaving only that undeniable pull that had drawn you to him back then—the one that still left you breathless.

Dean’s eyes softened as he looked at you, his hand still cradling your face, his touch just as tender, just as careful as it had been that night. You felt the years of anger and hurt begin to unravel, slipping away in the quiet, unspoken apology in his gaze. Even now, after everything, he still had the power to make you feel like that sixteen-year-old girl, standing in the glow of his attention, melting under the weight of his presence.

Dean’s gaze held yours, his thumb tracing one last gentle line over your cheek, the faintest tremor in his touch. His voice, low and rough, barely broke through the silence as he murmured, “But this time… you get a goodbye”. His words hung in the air, laced with a finality that tugged painfully at your heart. His hand slipped away, falling slowly, as though he were reluctant to break the connection, and you felt the warmth of his touch linger on your skin even after it was gone.

Just then, you saw movement from the corner of your eye, and Sam stepped out from where he’d been standing a little way off, his presence cautious, like he was unsure if this was the right moment to interrupt. His gaze flicked between you and Dean, a mixture of concern and understanding in his eyes.

Dean glanced over at his brother, his jaw tightening briefly, then gave a short nod as if signaling that it was time. Sam shifted, visibly uncomfortable, but nodded back, clearly catching onto something unspoken between them.

You looked at Dean, your chest heavy, a thousand words hovering on the edge of your lips, none of them able to break the ache settling inside you. He was here now, right in front of you, and yet it felt like he was already gone again, slipping through your fingers like he always had.

“Dean…”, you began, your voice barely more than a whisper, not even sure what you wanted to say—only that the thought of him leaving, of watching him disappear one more time, felt unbearable.

Dean’s gaze lingered on you, his expression a mix of longing and regret. He gave you that small, sad smile again, the one that barely reached his eyes but held a world of unspoken words. "Take care, sweetheart", he murmured, his voice rough, each syllable feeling like a farewell he wasn’t quite ready to give. He brushed his fingers lightly over your arm, the touch so soft it sent goosebumps skittering across your skin, a reminder of the warmth he’d once brought into your life, now bittersweet and fading too quickly.

He turned to leave, his back already to you, and something inside you snapped—an urge, a need to hold onto this moment, to keep him here just a second longer. Without thinking, you reached out, your hand catching his arm, stopping him in his tracks. He turned back, surprise flickering in his eyes as he looked down at you, and before you could second-guess yourself, you closed the distance between you.

Rising onto your toes, you slid your hand up to the back of his neck, feeling the warmth of his skin under your fingertips. His breath catching as you pulled him down, your lips meeting his in a kiss that was soft yet fierce, filled with the years of longing and questions you’d never had the chance to voice. He hesitated, just for a heartbeat, and then his arms wrapped around you, pulling you close as he returned the kiss with an intensity that sent a shiver down your spine.

His hand cupped the back of your head, fingers tangling gently in your hair, as his lips moved with yours, slow and purposeful, as if trying to make up for all the lost time in this one stolen moment. The world around you faded, the sounds of the bar, the ticking clock, all slipping away as you sank into him, feeling the strength of his arms, the familiarity of his touch. You felt his heart beating against yours, strong and steady, grounding you in a way only he ever had.

When you finally pulled back, your eyes met his, breath mingling in the small space between you. His gaze was softened, his expression more vulnerable than you’d ever seen, as though he was as taken by surprise as you were by the depth of what had just passed between you.

“That’s a proper goodbye”, you whispered, a faint blush coloring your cheeks despite yourself, but you held his gaze, not wanting to break the connection.

His lips curved into the faintest of smiles, a glint of that familiar warmth sparking in his eyes. You reached into your bag, your fingers brushing against the worn card you always kept there—a small, simple card from your bookstore, printed with your name and number. You handed it to him, your hand lingering as he took it from you, his fingers brushing yours in a touch that felt both comforting and electric.

“Call me”, you said softly, barely above a whisper, your voice carrying a warmth and a hope you hadn’t let yourself feel in years. “When you’re around again… I’ll pay you back with a milkshake”.

He looked down at the card in his hand, tracing his thumb over the print before glancing back at you, a mixture of amusement and something deeper in his eyes. For a moment, he didn’t say anything, just held your gaze, as if committing this moment, this feeling, to memory.

Finally, he nodded, tucking the card carefully into his pocket. “I’ll hold you to that”, he said, his voice low, a promise wrapped in that quiet tone.

With one last lingering look, he turned, his hand trailing down your arm until his fingers slipped away. And as he left, you felt a strange sense of peace settle in your chest, a hope that maybe this time, things wouldn’t end with silence and an empty space where he’d been. The ache was still there, but it was softened by the warmth of his touch, his kiss, and the quiet promise that maybe, just maybe, this wasn’t the end.

———————————

A/N: Please let me know what you think.🥰 Not gonna lie.. I think this is my favorite so far

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Taglist: @blackcherrywhiskey @baby19sthings @suckitands33 @spnfamily-j2 @lyarr24 @deans-baby-momma @reignsboy19 @kawaii-arfid-memes @mekkencspony @lovziy @artemys-ackles @fitxgrld @libby99hb @lovelyvirtualperson @a-lil-pr1ncess @nancymcl @the-last-ry @spndeanwinchesterlvr @hobby27 @themarebarroww @kr804573 @impala67rollingthroughtown @deans-queen @deadlymistletoe @selfdestructionandrhum @utyblyn @winchesterwild78 @jackles010378 @chirazsstuff @foxyjwls007 @smoothdogsgirl @woooonau @whimsyfinny @freyabear @laaadygisbooornex3 @quietgirll75 @perpetualabsurdity @pughsexual @berryblues46 @deanwinchestersgirl8734 @kr804573

[polarisbibliotheque]

Can You Hear The Rumble? - Vergil x Reader

Music Inspired Fics (Devil May Music) - Cirice, by Ghost

Pairing: Vergil x Reader

Summary: Everyone knew the kind of demon a hunter should be wary about is the one who plays with their victim's minds. You and Vergil were very proud on the outside - but how would it be when having to save each other on the inside for the first time?

TRIGGER WARNING: A lot of blood, cuts, bruises, scars and suffering on both Vergil and the reader's sides. The reader also struggles with perfection and self-loathing - in a "I'm never going to be a good person" kind of way, because I needed to get more intimate on the reader's part as well - and there are scenes with the reader covered in cuts and bleeding, though not self-imposed, it could be read like that. Those scenes are the reader's and Vergil's internal images of themselves. Reader and Vergil meet each other on their imperfections and the darkest parts of their souls, so BE WARNED. This might not be everyone's cup of tea and there are lots of potential triggers.

Author's Note: @tokkis-shelf asked me if Vergil's part of the Halloween special was inspired by Cirice, and here we are now. It is what kickstarted the song-fic requests! As with a lot of people, I think, Cirice is pretty personal to me.

In the video, it was so comforting to me seeing the black sheep being represented hahahaha and I guess that's why people love it so much. The part where they hold hands? I died, I'd never let go, I cry my soul out upon watching. (I did a very similar drawing to that scene when I was in school around 15 years ago, so it drop-kicked me out of my body xD)

Now, when writing this, I kept in mind that this song has a double meaning and can be quite comforting and quite manipulative at the same time - hence why I use the "can't you see that you're lost without me?" in two different situations, 'cause I think Cirice can be interpreted in so many ways and each person takes what they need from this song. I hope you guys like it!!

Plus, the song the reader and Dante sing at the end is The Power of Love, by Huey Lewis and The News

Cirice, by Ghost

“Can’t you see that you’re lost…?”

It happened every time Vergil walked in the darkness.

That voice in the back of his head, silently taunting him, the hiss of a quiet viper in the hopes of taking him back to the darkest parts of his soul. Quiet, lurking, whispering… Mundus always there, somewhere in the folds of his consciousness, guiding him back into the void – luring Vergil back into his shackles.

“Can’t you see that you’re lost without me?”

As if Vergil couldn’t belong anywhere else, as if his place was in Hell. After all he had been through, after all the sins he perpetrated, he believed wholeheartedly there was no hope for him at all – only a fool’s hope; only a glimmer of a wish he wasn’t as tainted as he was… A desire to not be such a monster as he was.

Pacing quietly through the empty cathedral, Vergil had already learned not to give in to those thoughts – to keep them at bay, as only a whisper in the darkness, of trickster voices that would always remind him of how inhuman he was.

It was times like this Vergil longed for the faint glimmer of the moon, or the warm ghostly light of a candle. It was easy to get lost in the dark, but a single ray of light could help through the direst of situations. That night, though, it seemed like the moon had fallen asleep behind the curtains of the clouds – Selene hiding her tears for her earthly lover in his eternal sleep.

None of you knew what that night entailed – you weren’t even certain what you were dealing with. That was the reason why Lady strutted in the Devil May Cry, not too fond of taking a job she didn’t know if it was up to her abilities.

“Well, looks like I have a new one for you to pay your debt, big guy!” Her singsong voice interrupted the ambience of the jukebox; Lady entering the shop with Kalina Ann and all.

“Eh, I’m never gonna be free of my debt, Lady, let’s be honest.” Dante sighed, putting his feet down and throwing his magazine across the table, shooting her a serious glare. “But things have been borin’ lately, so one of your odd jobs’ not gonna hurt. Whaddya have for me?”

“You talk as if I never help you enough to maintain this place.” She lifted one eyebrow, approaching the big desk at the middle of the shop.

“Gotta give the woman credit, Dante. Last month’s bills were on her.” You shrugged as you had finally come out of your shower, happy to see Lady around, still drying your hair with the towel as you went down the stairs.

“See? Someone who has a bit of common sense.” Her smile was nothing short of devilish as she gestured towards you.

“You know where you are, Lady. ‘Common sense’ isn’t much of a thing in this household.” You greeted her by quickly blowing her a kiss while passing by, making your way towards the couch where Vergil was quietly reading.

“Ey, you’re hurtin’ my feelings like that.” Dante put one of his hands over his heart, laughing alongside you as you kept on your way. “But fine. I’ll give ya that, Lady. So, what’s up? What job do you wanna throw at me this time?”

“I am not throwing it at you.” And there it was: you could always see when Dante stroke a nerve when Lady got defensive and with that fiery stare on her multicolored eyes. “If you wanna do it, great, if you don’t, I can deal with it myself just fine. I’m here to be a good friend since you can barely afford all that pizza you keep stuffing yourself with!”

As you sat by Vergil’s side, you both exchanged a telling glare. Just like you, Vergil was used to observing people. Granted, he didn’t know Lady as much as Dante or even you, but he did know her since he was very young. That fiery, easy-to-anger personality had been there since they first met at the Temen-ni-gru – and Vergil argued it was one of Lady’s traits that would never change.

Something he was quite pleased with, if he had to be honest with himself. It was a good trait for a human demon hunter like her. Dante always praised human’s hearts and particularly their love and empathy – Vergil praised their burning anger that made them unconquerable in the direst of circumstances.

“Jeez, alright, alright, don’t shoot me!” Dante raised his hands as if he was at gunpoint, making you wheeze quietly. Vergil side-eyed you for a while – half judging, half holding his own laugh. “It’s not like I have much of a choice, do I?”

“Humpf.” Lady rolled her eyes and took a slice of pizza from the box resting on the desk, pointing at Dante with it right after. “You know I wouldn’t bring you something if it wasn’t important.”

“Actually, you would.” With those words, Dante rested his arms crossed on the table – all the while, you and Vergil watched it all as if it was a show. Who needed a TV when you had those two? “But you’re bein’ too dodgy ‘bout it, babe. What’s goin’ on?”

“I got a call from a priest in a city nearby.” Lady’s answer was uncharacteristically quiet, followed by a bite from the pizza while she seemed pensive and in any hurry to chew it. “I’ve done some jobs there, know the guy, he’s nice. All the times he called me, it was always a quick, good-paying job. He said some weird things have been happening at the cathedral for the last couple of weeks.”

“Not to sound mean, but there’s always somethin’ strange happenin’ at churches.” Dante’s eyes carried a bit of skepticism: ‘weird things’ didn’t always entail a job for the Devil May Cry – and it usually ended with all of you hunting a rogue raccoon or something.

“I know. But this guy, he doesn’t get scared easy, ok? He’s one of those types of priests who’ll try to shoot down a couple of demons with a shotgun and, if that doesn’t work, he gives me a call.” Those words, though, made you and the Spardas raise your eyebrows. Indeed, it was a rare type of priest, but a good one to keep as acquaintance. “He said the cathedral is increasingly quiet, even from noises outside, with occasional distant noises that are not done by any of those who live there. After it all started, the other priests reported having weird nightmares, of being chased by something in the dark, inside the cathedral – this thing whispering things they can’t understand. Alright if it happened to one or two, but soon all of them started waking up in the middle of the night with similar nightmares – and, catch this, the higher ups of the clergy didn’t tell the common priests about it, but they all reported the very same dream.” Those words caught everyone’s attention. Vergil finally closed his book and leaned forward, paying attention to Lady’s retelling of the priest’s misfortunes. “The priest has been trying to figure out what’s going on, but some old books appear to go missing from the library, only to re-appear as if nothing has happened. Some books are missing pages, something that never happened before. He also said the inside of the cathedral has been getting darker and darker as the weeks go by. As if something is approaching – his words, not mine.”

Vergil immediately furrowed his brows and seemed to turn into an ice sculpture right by your side. You risked a glance, finding him with his usual dark aura – pensive, somber and quiet; hunter’s eyes showing themselves in a matter of seconds.

“Rare are the creatures in Hell in search for knowledge…” He muttered loud enough for his brother and Lady to turn their attention to him. “But those who do, are usually among the worst. Haunting noises, torn books, nightmares, dead silence and total darkness…”

“What? You think those Hell Piranhas came out of their pit?” Dante’s question had a bit of fun in the words, but his eyes were serious and he didn’t allow his lips to smile.

“Could be. Could also be a demon trying to mimic them to hide something else.”

“Hell Piranhas?” You and Lady didn’t need a cue to ask at the very same time. Neither of you had ever heard of that – and both of you had heard of a lot.

“This is not their name, but it is how Dante calls them since we were kids.” Vergil almost sighed in response.

“How we both called ‘em. Mister smart-pants over here isn’t that much better than lil’ ol’ me.” Dante winked at both of you, making you giggle quietly in return. “They’re kinda like illusion demons, but they like stayin’ in the darkness and gatherin’ knowledge. Usually work for someone bigger, though.”

“And even if they don’t, they swallow up all their knowledge and that is dangerous in itself. Afterwards, they feed from the victims they have been toying for so long.” Vergil continued Dante’s thought, ignoring his brother’s previous words. The more you didn’t think about what Dante had said about him, the better – for Vergil couldn’t deny it. “They hunt in packs, and the more victims, the more powerful they become. Some call them the Pit Deceivers, others call them the Lie Weavers…”

“You call them Hell Piranhas.” You concluded bluntly, making Vergil stare at the horizon with emptiness in his eyes – he could say all he wanted, flex all his demonic knowledge, you heard the Piranhas and now you’d never forget it.

“I never heard of them.” Lady had her eyebrows furrowed, searching her memory for some story like that.

“They either don’t leave the pit that much or not many humans survive to tell the story. That’s why.” Dante pointed at a great, old book Vergil had left on one of the tables a long time ago and now it was its official resting place. “You can find it only in the likes of the Codex Daemonica.”

“So either we have them around, or it’s something else. Something bigger. Right?” As you asked, Vergil only agreed with his head as the attentions turned to you. “Or something mimicking the Piranhas.” And Vergil had to sigh at your addition. He would never have peace again. “The mimic or the master, what kind of demon would the Piranhas answer to? If they are that obscure, I take it their existence is more of a niche knowledge in Hell rather than a common information.”

“On that, you are correct…” Vergil murmured in response, falling back into his pensive demeanor. You knew he would be lost for a while.

“See? Good thing I brought this for you, then.” Lady waved dismissively at Dante, but you could sense a little edge in her playful voice. Dealing with big things was fine, same as dealing with cruel demons and the ones that played the big-scary-one persona. Unknown demons were another kind of monster – one only Dante and Vergil used to deal with. “Plus, they always pay well.”

“Eh, I won’t be seein’ much of that money, if I know ya well.” Dante scoffed, having a small smile hidden in the corner of his lips; his tone and demeanor, though, were quite somber and you knew the red devil was taking it seriously.

“If you don’t mind, Dante, I would like to take over this one.” Vergil finally declared while getting up from the couch. “I know some of the hellish creatures who might make use of the Weavers or mimic them.”

“Fine for me, I’m needin’ some time to rest.” Dante sighed, but looked right back at you while Vergil rested his book on the big Devil May Cry desk. “But I’m gonna feel a lot better with someone around to keep an eye on ‘im, pretty thing.”

“Well, I didn’t intend on letting you guys deal with this all by yourselves anyway.” You got up from the couch, immediately receiving a glare from Vergil. “I’m going, blue devil, whether you want it or not. I want to get acquainted with these Piranhas.”

Vergil only closed his eyes, letting out the longest and most regretful sigh you ever heard in your life.

And there you were – although Vergil lost track of you quite a while ago. He knew the stirrings rippling through his heart when you were in danger; and being the fierce human you were, Vergil wasn’t worried about having you search for the demons in the cathedral.

There was, though, a slight uneasiness. That voice echoing in the darkest parts of his soul, it always came as an omen – causing nothing but destruction, inside or outside of himself. Vergil never could really say which one would be, but both were devastating.

“Veeeeergil…”

His steps came to a dry halt in the middle of the cathedral. The night outside the colorful stained-glass windows was pitch black, robbing the colors of their warmth and light – the fire on the candles, long dead in that cold night. The whisper that crept to his ears, like stark chalk on a chalkboard, dragged itself through the marble floor and took a hold of his soul in its clutches.

It was a different kind of sound – different from the ones inside himself, calling him to the darkness. It was from the outside… The Lie Weavers. Slowly coming up, finding him as their next victim. He was close to one of the places they were certainly lurking in the shadows, patiently waiting for someone they could consume.

Vergil never feared the darkness. Tightening his grip around Yamato, his steps resumed his way, approaching the places in the cathedral the faint light of the night could barely touch. Those demons should have known their end was near, and he was the harbinger of their demise – he expected all kinds of trickery, of resistance, of fight from them.

He did not expect to hear a familiar voice, filled with uncertainty.

“Vergil…?”

Halting his steps once more, this time his silvery eyes lost their predatorial gaze as his heart jumped in his chest – even if for a slight second.

“Mother?”

His answer was but a whisper before he was swallowed by darkness.

*

When engaging with illusion demons, one should be aware of not falling into their element: when engulfed by it, those demons were more powerful than expected, able to subdue even the strongest of foes. Breaking from their control required mental and emotional discipline rather than brute force.

It was a slight second – a foolish slip from his human soul, disarmed by the trickery of Eva’s voice – and Vergil was surrounded by a sea of darkness and turmoil. His heart stirred with anger towards himself for being such a child, a vulnerable stupid child, tricked by a puppet of something his heart missed so much.

Eva was long dead. There was no demon able to bring her back. And he would never see her again. All that logic was tossed aside in a spark of a second by his stupid human heart, trembling upon hearing her speak his name again. Granted, Vergil only heard his mother in his dreams, barely remembering how her voice sounded in reality, and this time he heard outside himself – but he should have seen it coming. Illusion demons, trickster demons, cruel demons… They all relied on the barely closed scars inside his damned human soul.

Vergil could always count on them to re-open those wounds, making him bleed as much as he did on the floor of that cursed cemetery so many years ago – and he was a fool to fall for it after he had been through so much.

“Vergil… Can you hear me…?”

“I can, you damned deceiver. You can stop these theatrics – mimicking my dead mother will not affect me.” His voice cut through the dark like the sharpest of ice, his predatorial gaze back into his silver eyes.

“I… Don’t understand you, son. I cannot find you.” Her voice had a tinge of sorrow and desperation – but it was exactly like Eva’s voice. Vergil remembered it with a tinge of gold, probably a result of the haze of nostalgia, but today it was grounded and melancholic – perhaps, that was how Eva had always sounded… He just didn’t remember it. “I can’t find you. You aren’t home.”

“I haven’t been home for a long while.” Vergil didn’t even try to hide the growl that raised from his chest as he argued with that creature. He was used to having a puppet of his mother parading in front of him to hurt his human soul even more, but that was already getting on his nerves. Taunting him about the fact his mother ran to find him that fateful night wasn’t part of the usual games those filthy demons played – and to say they were honing his wrath was an understatement. “And I will never be back.”

“I… I cannot see you, Vergil. Where are you…? Why…?” He could hear the weeping in her voice, faint sobbing while the desperation made her words tremble. Vergil raised his head in the darkness, holding his own heart not to quiver: she wasn’t real and it was all a gimmick to affect him. He would not be affected. He was stronger than that. “Why couldn’t I save you? Those demons they… They hurt you, didn’t they? Oh, my child! My son! They hurt you and I could do nothing! I couldn’t be your mother!”

“Enough with this, filthy, hellish creature!” His voice finally exploded from his chest, roaring in the dark and echoing through the void, finding only silence. “You have no right to desecrate my mother’s memory like this! Shut your putrid mouth and stop with your rancid lies!”

The glint of the Yamato being unsheathed made the darkness recoil for a split second, only to envelop the Dark Slayer once more. His grip was tight, his eyes fiercely looking for his first opponent to direct a very well-placed judgement cut that could end all those creatures with just one swing of his hand. Vergil had enough and all the patience he carried in his being wouldn’t be enough to stop him from overkilling those demons – he just had to know where to direct his wrath.

“Don’t say those words, Vergil… You are not… Not like this.” Her voice still trembled, and his hand was still certain around Yamato. Vergil knew quite well at that state he was a weapon of mass destruction, he just had to find his opponent. His soul was screaming for him to do that, to put a stop to all that mockery. “You are good… You are my son.”

Vergil would have sliced that demon into a thousand million pieces without flinching, even if it took the form of his mother – but his eyes widened as a soft, warm hand touched his face. In all those years being taunted by demons, being tricked and mocked, seeing so many puppets of Eva, Sparda and Dante, none of them had touched him… And none of them genuinely felt like them.

It had been so many lost years he hadn’t felt his mother’s touch – last time, she could cup his entire face, thumb lovingly caressing his innocent eyebrows, but now her thumb could only reach his cheekbones. Nevertheless, it felt like her: not like a golden, nostalgic lost memory of how she felt, but exactly like Eva’s hands, even with the slight roughness of her continuous gardening.

“It took me so long to find you… I am so sorry.”

“You are not my mother.”

“Don’t say that.” Her answer was a sorrowful whisper, her thumb now carefully caressing his sharp cheekbone. Vergil closed his eyes, unable to move, convincing himself all of that wasn’t real and not allowing his heart to sway – forcing his arms to remain frozen by his side, fighting the urge to embrace her. Reminding himself: his mother was dead, killed while trying to save him, a long time ago, and nothing could bring her back. “Your heart hasn’t hardened as much as not to recognize me. You…” Her voice once more became soft, as if trying to do the same with his soul. “You are not a monster… You are my son, my Vergil.”

With those words, Eva’s hand was finally met with a tear – melting the ice from those silvery eyes.

*

There was an impending storm rumbling inside your chest.

Whenever that turmoil took ahold of your heart, you knew Vergil was in trouble. You had just finished checking your side of the cathedral, finding some things out of the ordinary but no demons, when the waves became aggressive in your chest. Your steps were already taking you to meet him, but you found yourself walking even hastier – the sound, though, eaten by the shadows that seemed to only grow around you.

Neither of you had calm seas of feelings: they usually raged like a maelstrom of emotions you could barely get through without some destruction – be it internal or external. But there was a certain note of melancholy and desperation in your heart at that moment that made you know Vergil was hurting – and that hurting, you knew quite well.

It was almost ironic how you apparently despised each other at the beginning, but after a while you came to understand; that aversion was there because you, in a certain way, were a mirror of each other. You could see in him the traits in your soul you disliked the most, and Vergil did see in you the same thing – those traits, however, were the same ones that brought you together, and made both you and Vergil feel seen and understood for the first time in your lives.

He didn’t judge your sins, as you didn’t judge his. To your eyes, he was never a monster, and to his, you could never be as crooked as you thought you were. You found each other in imperfection and, in that, you managed to talk and feel on the same level – after that, every feeling of admiration, care and love was easy to blossom.

You understood that storm, that thunder rumbling inside your chest at that very moment. You could feel it exactly the way he felt – and you knew Vergil needed help… Even if he would never say so himself.

You couldn’t hear or see him, though. You found yourself exactly at his area of patrol in the cathedral, but there was no clue as where your blue devil had gone – and for him to completely disappear, imposing presence and all, was quite an achievement in itself. The air was stiff, heavy as if the windows had never been opened, eating up any sound from the inside and the outside. The darkness was heavier than the one you had previously patrolled, shadows allowing only a few glimpses of the opulent decoration and the path in front of you – although, you couldn’t see more than a few meters beyond your feet.

If you couldn’t trust your sight or your hearing to find him, you could trust your heart: the storm would guide you. Closing your eyes, you allowed your feelings to take over, following with your footsteps in the direction you could hear his soul calling.

Those shadow creatures wouldn’t be able to hide him from you: no matter what happened or where you found yourselves, you would always be able to feel Vergil’s presence and find him in the darkest of hours.

And as the thunder in your chest cracked violently, your feet came to a halt and you opened your eyes.

Right in front of you, there was only darkness. Not like in the shadows that took the cathedral little by little, but pitch-black darkness, that no light could cast aside. To enter it would mean to be completely bare: vulnerable, lost, without guidance, naked – but the screaming in your soul made it very clear Vergil was in there.

Contrary to your lover, you were afraid of the dark. You always preferred to have a little light by your side, for you never knew what could be lurking alongside you, ready to pounce and drag you to certain suffering and death. You protected yourself by being forever vigilant, as you always did – a trait that exhausted you, yes, but luckily, in the last few years, you had Vergil around to keep a light by you when your body started giving out.

For that reason, you would never fear entering the darkness for him.

And with a deep breath, your bold steps took you inside the dark.

*

Your feet were cold, bare, stumbling over a sticky floor. Even if your eyes could see only darkness, you felt the freezing air of that night slicing your skin: you were shirtless and something was hurting… Oozing. The cold wind mixed with a faint warmness that leaked from the open wounds on your skin.

Blood. You were bleeding.

Your arms immediately wrapped around you – those scars, they were showing. They never showed before.

Running your hands quickly over your body, you could feel the warm blood slipping through your fingers; some wounds barely holding themselves closed while others still poured as in the day they were created.

That was the version of yourself you used to fiercely hide. None of those wounds were physical, none of them could be seen… But whenever you looked in the mirror, you saw them there, under your skin, under your soul, quietly resting until you couldn’t hide them anymore.

“You are lost…”

It was always the same voice, of something dark, something inside you that could break your soul if you didn’t shove it back into the darkness like you always did. That was why you were afraid; that was why Vergil always kept a faint glow by your side whenever you couldn’t hold yourself together. The dark was dangerous to you – to both of you.

“You are lost without me…”

“I can survive quite well without you…!” You growled to the darkness, keeping that part of yourself at bay. The part that gave in to the pain, that bathed in the blood and didn’t want to get up… And the part that would bathe and rise in rage, making you survive at great cost to those around you.

You were past that. And you didn’t need that to survive. You didn’t have to survive, you could live.

“Can’t you see that you’re lost…?”

“Vergil!” Your scream was a roar in the dark, looking for the one you plunged into the darkness to find. You wouldn’t give in to the trickery of those Piranhas – and you would get Vergil out of there.

They would learn they shouldn’t fear only the son of Sparda: they should also fear you.

“You think you can find him…?” After the mischievous ethereal voice questioned, you heard a giggle rippling around your feet as you stumbled on the sticky floor to find your lover. “You think you are that good? You think you aren’t a monster?”

You furrowed your brows, doing your best to ignore the voices. You knew it was that part inside of you that always taunted how broken you were, how imperfect your soul was. For the longest time you believed there was nothing good in you, nothing to save you from a life of loneliness, until you crossed paths with Vergil.

He was broken too – and he would never judge the things you did to survive your lethal wounds.

“Vergil! Can you hear me?! I’m here to find you!”

“How chivalrous, how heroic! What are you trying to accomplish?” The giggles pooled around your feet, threatening to drag you inside that pool of viscous darkness. “Trying to prove yourself? You’re never going to be perfect. You’re a black sheep, an outcast, remember? The likes of you aren’t heroes.”

“Oh, I’m no hero…” You growled back, fighting against the things trying to pull you back; fighting against the pain of the freezing cold and warmness of blood. “I’m a fucking fighter. You’re messing with the wrong kind of monster, fucking Hell Piranhas.”

“Piranhas…?” A faint whisper in the dark broke whatever control those things were trying to have over your body, starting at your feet. It was Vergil’s whisper – followed by a louder speaking tone. “Y/n! I can feel you, where are you?!”

“Trying to find you!” You screamed back, immediately dragging your feet towards Vergil. You couldn’t see him, but you could feel where he was – and there was nothing those demons could do against that.

The darkness seemed to shift for a couple of seconds. You couldn’t understand what was happening, but you saw a faint, ghostly pale glow in the dark – almost imperceptible, but your heart knew, you could finally see Vergil.

And, in return, he could see you. Moving his feet, Vergil dragged heavy shackles through the floor, screeching in a horrid, soul scratching sound as he willed his body to move towards you. You could hear him grunting with the effort, another set of chains being dragged as Vergil moved his arms – slowly, but surely, wearing all of his strength to get to you.

You felt the viscous ripples of the floor creeping up your legs, almost on your knees, doing their best to pull you away – back into the darkness, back to the taunting voices, to the doubt, the hurt, the self-loathing.

“Vergil! Let me hear your voice! You’re still there, right?!”

“Yes. I am always here.” His answer came with grunts of effort, barely above the noise of the chains screeching around him.

The darkness shifted again, and his form became even more visible, as yours did to him – followed by a scream that rumbled in his chest, Vergil managed to get even closer. That made something spark inside yourself, that thundering storm breaking in your soul cracking in a scream that broke the insidious tentacles holding you back and making you lunge forward.

Once again, the glow you diffused only to each other seemed to get stronger as the darkness wavered.

“Y/n…” He growled once more, the shackles screaming on the floor as he reached out to you.

“Vergil…!” You reached out in return, barely making out the form of his fingers in the dark.

As you were almost touching each other’s hands, the heavy, muffling darkness faltered once more. You could finally see one another, as you were in that godforsaken place.

Vergil was shirtless, his body covered in wounds – new and old – bleeding profusely. His silvery eyes were red, sunken in deep shadow, surrounded by a deep purple mist on his dry skin. You could see his bones under his pale skin covered in so many lacerations you wouldn’t even know where to start healing him. His knuckles were battered, showing the flesh underneath, as well as his wrists covered by heavy iron shackles – wounds from fighting against them for so long. His hands were still long and elegant, but bony and covered in bruises.

You had never seen Vergil so hurt, so broken, so… Vulnerable.

In return, his eyes took in shock the vision of you: as shirtless as him, as battered and wounded as he was. Even if not locked in the shackles he wore for so long in Hell, you walked barefoot leaving a trail of blood behind you. Those scars, those wounds, those bruises… He knew they were there, but he had never seen those. You looked weak and tired, bloodshot eyes under dry skin, as if you hadn’t slept in ages… And those things you fought so much to conceal, now crystal clear in front of him.

Those were the scars you carried inside yourselves. The wounds you had to fight against every day – that you had to try to heal, even if sometimes it seemed impossible. The things you would never show, but, somehow, you managed to sense it in each other… Now you could see it, clear as a bright night.

And, even if you wouldn’t admit to yourselves, those were the very same breaking thunders that would keep you moving – fiercely fighting, fiercely surviving.

As you took in each other’s internal selves, Vergil’s silvery eyes finally found yours.

A loud thundering noise shook the floor underneath your feet twice, as your hearts rumbled alongside the devastating sound. You lunged forward, holding Vergil’s hand as if your life depended on it. Never breaking your eye contact, Vergil held your hand with the strength you would expect of the legendary Dark Slayer. You made each other stronger, and there was nothing that could come between you now.

His shackles immediately screeched back, pulling Vergil violently away from you. At the same time, you were grabbed by the viscous darkness – your knees, your legs, your abdomen, your arms. It pulled you back with vicious strength, doing its best to drag you away from him – back into the darkness.

“Don’t let me go!” You screamed back, tightening your grip around his bony hand.

“I will never let go!” He growled, doing the same, trying to drag his body forward – failing to notice you willed yourself towards him as he pulled you into his arms. Those silvery eyes never moved away from yours.

“You are lost…! Lost…!”

The voices chanted and screeched around you, doing their best to drag you apart. For a moment, your hand slipped and you let out a desperate scream, hurting your lungs as you were almost pulled back into the void. Vergil’s cry resembled a roar as he willed his body to move and tightened his grip in a way he didn’t hold even Yamato.

He hadn’t held his brother’s hand once. This time he wouldn’t make the same mistake. This time, he would hold you even if that damned the both of you to the darkest pits of Hell.

“Can’t you see…? Can’t you see that…?”

“I am lost…!” You barked back to the voices, still staring into Vergil’s eyes, trying to catch your breath while your lungs stung as if you were inhaling a thousand knives.

As Vergil looked into your eyes, though, he knew exactly what you were going to say – and he could safely say it was the very same thing he struggled to find the words to.

“Without you.” His answer came in a dark tone, ragged from the effort he too made to be able to hold your hand.

The thunder rumbled twice again – the voices shrieked and you suddenly found yourselves being launched into each other’s arms as the forces that bind you broke into a million pieces.

Vergil’s arms wrapped around you, one of his hands holding your head close to his chest, as you wrapped yours around his waist, keeping him as close as you could. His head rested on top of yours, and you kept your eyes closed – washing away the blood above his heart with the tears that streamed down your face.

“Don’t ever hide from me.” Vergil’s voice was uncharacteristically shaky, somber but reassuring. You had never been so vulnerable in front of him – and even upon seeing you like that, his reaction was to take you in his arms, to welcome you. “I’m not afraid of the dark.”

“And I’m not afraid of your darkness.” You tightened your arms around his cold, bony body as you felt tears running through your hair. “I can see beyond your glimmer, and I’m not afraid of what’s in the dark.” Your voice shook as you took a deep breath and Vergil’s arms held you even closer – his body shaking with the tears falling from his eyes. “It’s you. And I’m never afraid of you.”

“Neither am I of you.”

His answer was but a whisper – a whisper enough to break the darkness into a memory to be kept away in the deepest pits of Hell.

I can feel the thunder that’s breaking in your heart I can see through the scars inside you

*

*

*

*

“You killed the Piranhas from Hell with the power of love?”

Vergil wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear. Or die. Or both.

Probably both.

The whole crew was there as you and Vergil never came back from the job as quickly as expected – and when you did, it looked like you hadn’t slept in days.

The priest was more than happy with the result of your work – even though you never discovered why the Weavers decided to come out of hiding nor what they wanted. The congregation was just happy they were gone and the whole reason behind it would be a long-term thing for the Devil May Cry to work on – or to keep an eye on; maybe something bigger was approaching.

You and Vergil didn’t feel like going back to the shop, though. When you were hurt physically, things were very much ok to deal with, but when the wounds were emotional… You needed time for yourselves.

Unlike his brother, Vergil was a little more responsible with his money – and you, a lot more than the two. You managed to find somewhere to spend a few nights… Which involved the both of you talking out everything you felt and saw. It was harrowing at first, something neither of you were versed in and honestly were terrified of, but it eventually brought you even closer together.

So, to say you had defeated the Lie Weavers with the power of love was something that killed Vergil inside.

And you could almost see his internal self, glaring at you with a ‘really, after all of this you say this kind of foolishness’ look in his sad, silvery eyes, as Lady stared at both of you and made the question everyone was thinking.

“Yep. Power of love, it’s a curious thing.” You shrugged, making Vergil physically groan by your side while Dante slapped his table with a huge grin on his face.

“Make a one man weep, make another man sing! Hell yeah, Back To The Future, babe!” He winked back at you as you smiled in response.

“Of all the people you could end up dating, Vergil…” Trish sat on Dante’s desk, crossing her long legs while sporting a devilish smile on her rosy lips. It was interesting how her voice could never really sound like Eva’s. “It had to be someone who references the same songs as your brother.”

“Alas, fate plays many games…” Vergil rolled his eyes, but as they rested on you, there was a vulnerability you saw only once in that pitch black darkness. “But it is kind enough to give us what we need.”

No one ever really understood what he meant, but Dante was the only one who managed to see something inside his brother’s silvery eyes that could only reflect in yours – and that made him genuinely smile.

Indeed, you would never be the romance of a fairy tale book or a romantic comedy – but you could see what lied beyond each other’s scars; taking a glimpse at the worst of each other without fear and finding whatever light was left inside. You could understand – and that was much more than most lovers in the world would ever have.

[imabeautifulbutterfly]

Congratulations on your milestone! If you are still doing this, can I request a jukebox roulette for Rex with a F! Reader or OC, with the song:

I'm so excited to see what you do with this!

Thank you so much @callsign-denmark !

You are such a sweetheart.

I listened to this song, and then the album and I just love this band! Thank you for introducing them to me!

Alright, so I hope you love my interpretation of this, it might not be what you were hoping for, but I tried.

Love oo

Glowing In The Dark

Warnings: Severe injury, tears, begging, pleading, declarations of love, realities of war, passing out from exhaustion, refusing to leave, surgery, symbiotic relationship, angst, hurt/comfort. I think that's it. If I miss anything please let me know.

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The bruises, cuts, and pain that radiated on your face and body, was too much for Rex. He held your hand as you waited for a medic. The fighting had been especially brutal, and the med tent was inundated with casualties, some far worse than yours.  

Tears pricked his eyes as you lay there moaning in pain.

“You’re alright, cyar’ika. You’re going to be alright. Just hang in there. Please.”

He pressed a subtle kiss to the back of your hand, not that he really needed to be subtle, every single person part of the 501st knew you two were together. It was the worst kept secret, and frankly neither of you cared. 

He certainly didn’t, when you showed up in his life you were a light in the darkness. 

Not just figuratively, but also quite literally. You’d fallen into a bioluminescent pond and when you came upon Rex and General Skywalker, with your own elite Commando unit, he thought you were a glowing angel in the dark. 

It was thanks to your ethereal appearance, he survived that mission. The other side, thought you were a ghost, and scared them into dropping their weapons. 

You coughed, and groaned in pain, he squeezed your hand, “Cyar’ika, hang in there. Just think about what we’re going to do next shore leave. You promised me to take me… what was that again, oh right window shopping. Whatever that is. You said we’d spend the day together, relaxing and enjoying the day. So… you need to hold on so we can do that together.”

The warm liquid filling his eyes was getting to be too much, as he subtly brushed them away. 

“Remember the last time we were on Trip Zip, you convinced me to go to a poetry reading. I know I grumbled all night about it, but I’ll gladly suffer through another night of that if it means I get to sit beside you, holding your hand, feeling your body pressed against mine. So please hold on.”

There was a tear that slid down your cheek, as the pain was becoming unbearable. 

“MEDIC!” Rex called again, hoping someone was free. Where was Kix when he needed him!

“Rex…” you softly whispered.

He leaned in closer, “What is it, cyar’ika?”

“I … I …” you coughed again, “ I love … you.”

“I love you, too, but right now save your strength. Just stay awake for me, okay?”

Your head moved slowly, an almost imperceptible nod. 

“Do you remember our first night together? How hard you held on to me, never wanting to let me go? That’s how hard I need you to fight right now. I need you to keep awake, to stay here with me. Please, you’re my light in the dark. I can’t lose you.”

The usually stoic voice trembled out of his mouth. He didn’t want to lose it, he needed to stay strong for you.

With each passing minute and second, he felt his heart screaming more and more for you, begging for you to not leave him. To stay by his side, to always stay. 

“Baby …” his voice was barely above a whisper, the only person who could hear him was you, “don’t leave me. Please. I’ve learned to bear the loss of so many of my brothers, I’ve tried to be strong, to not let it get to me, but … please.” He pressed his forehead against your hand, “Please, I won’t make it if you leave me too.”

His body slowly moved closer, kneeling beside the stretcher you were on, “I’ve learned to bear their passing, the responsibility of their loss, of what it means to be Captain, and … I promise, I’ll bear everything else. I’ll do everything and anything, just please … please stay.”

Tears streamed down his cheek as he felt the grip that had been so strong moments slowly start to wane. 

“MEDIC!” He shouted again, praying this time that one of the medics were free. 

“Vod?” Kix ran over to the tent the minute he heard Rex’s voice, he’d just made it back from the front but as soon as he saw your face, the way your body slowly started to relax, he knew there was no time. 

Rex turned to look at his vod, tears trickling down his face as he clenched your hand against his chest, “Vod, I … I can’t see her glow… where’s her glow?”

“MEDIC TEAM ON ME!”

Within an instant you were lifted away from Rex and taken behind the surgical screen, Rex stayed kneeling on the ground in that very spot, afraid to move, afraid that if he did he’d lose his connection to you. 

Despite everyone trying to coax him to a seat, to rest, to get some food, he refused. He simply waited kneeling in that spot, his eyes closed the entire time you were in surgery.  It was almost six hours later when Kix and his team brought you back to him. You looked better, there was a slight glow to your skin. Despite the fact it had almost been a year since you fell into that bioluminescent pool, you still glowed in the dark. 

“Don’t worry she’ll be alright,” Kix pressed his hand against Rex’s shoulder, “took out quite a bit of shrapnel, fixed a few broken bones, and a perforated bowel, but she’ll be alright. Once we get them onboard the Resolute, she’ll be going straight into a bacta tank.”

Rex crumpled against the ground as soon as he knew you were safe, he was beyond exhausted from the stress and anxiety of almost losing you. Kix, simply smirked, shaking his head as they arranged for him to have a cot right beside you.

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[try-set-me-on-fire]

For the song + character ask- Hold It In (Jukebox The Ghost) + Eddie Diaz

Maybe I'm in love and maybe it's starting to tell

Only thing that I can do is hold it in, hold it in

Was told that I'm a man now and I'm not allowed to cry

[haveatthee83]

Under My Skin (Monkey D. Luffy/Reader) 5/7

Inspo: Under My Skin by Jukebox the Ghost

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7

Word Count: ~2.0k

Warnings: Fluff, cursing, discussion of death and dead relatives, brief descriptions of peril.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Time passed and it seemed that you and Luffy had turned over to a new chapter together, a new little dance. This was clearly noted by the other Straw-Hats, after all a tension was there, a new kind that was clear to them what it was, but it flew right over your heads, making all of them ready to pull their hair out at times with how oblivious you two were.

You all were docked at an island that was said to have been a rest spot for Gol D. Roger, hoping to find clues to where he may have hidden the One Piece. It wasn’t populated and it only had one little beachside shack that you and Robin were put in charge of searching.

You were sat on an old, dusty couch, sifting through an ancient, wooden crate full of notebooks when Robin spoke up from her position at the bookshelf. “So, you and Luffy, huh?” she said cheekily, flipping through an astronomy book.

You felt heat rise to your face, biting at your cheeks, “I don’t know what you mean.” You said, sitting a little straighter than before.

Robin smirked, eyeing you over the brim of her book, “You have a little crush on our captain, don’t you?” she sing songed, flipping the page. You spluttered and scrambled to try and find words to retort, but you came up short, “It’s okay if you do.” She hummed. “It’s not against any rules here.”

You felt red hot as you spoke, “It wouldn’t matter if I did or not, I highly doubt he’d even consider thinking about me that way.” You said simply, sifting through a notebook full of inventory logs.

Robin frowned, “How do you know?” she asked, affirmed by your shrug, “Exactly. He’s a very unique kind of man, very unpredictable. He may just surprise you.”

“Or I could be right, and if I ever made a move, it’d go horribly and he’d hate my guts again, he might even feel so strongly about it that he’d have no choice but to maroon me.” You muttered quickly, avoiding Robin’s piercing gaze.

“You have so little faith in him?” she asked pointedly. “No.” you sighed, “He’s so nice and great, and he’s just like the sweetest guy, but…” you trailed off until Robin urged you to continue, “I’m me. I’m abrasive, I’m way too brutal half the time for such a nice guy, I mean…Does someone with this much blood on their hands deserve someone like that? I can’t bring myself to think so.” You said, making Robin’s frown deepen.

Luffy, Zoro, and Sanji were scavenging around the island’s vegetation looking for clues, food, or an adventure. “So,” Zoro droned suddenly, “You and glass girl, huh?”

Sanji and Luffy stopped in their tracks, Sanji kicking at Zoro’s shin, “You have no tact.” He hissed as Zoro waved him off.

Luffy cocked his head to the side a bit, “What’re you talking about?”

Sanji sighed, “What moss head over here is trying to insinuate is that you and our lovely crewmate might…have romantic feelings for each other?” He said carefully, trying to find just the right words.

Luffy’s face went red, all the way to his ears, “I don’t think so.” He said, fiddling with his hat string. “She probably likes one of you.” Luffy sighed, kicking at the dirt under his feet.

Sanji and Zoro shared a look, breaking into deep belly laughs, remembering the conversation they’d had at your house, “Not a chance dude!” Zoro laughed out, clapping Luffy’s shoulder, “She made that clear since day one.”

“What do you mean?” the pirate captain asked, brows knit together.

“When we were all at her house, the cook tried to make a move on her like he always does,” Zoro started, “and she shut him down hard.” He managed through his laughter.

Sanji’s laughter had died down, now just a goofy smile on his face, “She says we’re too old and not her ‘type’.” He said, “You wanna know what her type is?” he asked.

Luffy shrugged and nodded, holding his arms close to his body.

“Funny brunettes.” The other two chimed together.

Zoro poked Luffy in the shoulder, “She specifically said like you.” He teased, noting the cherry red cheeks of his captain.

Luffy felt like the whole island just went up in temperature by like twenty degrees, “O-oh.” He muttered, shaking his head as he said, “I doubt it though, I mean I was mean to her for a while at first, I doubt she’d look past that.”

Sanji rolled his eyes, slinging an arm around his captain’s shoulders, “We saw you two dancing on your birthday, you know?” Sanji said pointedly, Zoro nodding along, “You both looked awful comfy all up on each other like that.” The cook said, watching Luffy hide his face in his hands, embarrassed. “It’s nothing to be all flustered about.”

“Yeah, I mean, you two have been making goo goo eyes at each other ever since.” Zoro chided.

Sanji nodded, “And she’s been looking at you like that for even longer.” He said, “I’m pretty damned sure that she really likes you.”

Luffy let his hands flop to his sides, his face still burning, “You think so?”

Sanji and Zoro shared a look, “We know so.” The chimed.

You continued looking through the ship logs in silence, Robin still searching at the bookshelf. Your eyes were starting to haze over when they landed on something. You gasped and snatched the notebook up, startling Robin. You quickly flipped through the pages with a wide smile, “This has their routes! It’s all verbal but it’s where all they docked and what channels and obstacles they encountered. Robin,” you exclaimed, shooting to your feet, “this might have where to find the One Piece, or at least the poneglyphs.” You said, your eyes sparkling.

Robin smiled, “Go find Nami or Luffy and show them. I’ll keep sifting through things in here, see if there’s any more valuable information.” She said, shooing you out of the rickety door.

You immediately tore your way over the sand, dashing into the thicket. You pounded through the trees, dodging stray branches and roots, “LUFFY! LUFFY, I FOUND SOMETHING!” you hollered into the trees. You heard a brief call from your left, so you immediately started rushing that way.

Luffy heard you yelling through the vegetation and called back out, trying to tell you where he is. The trio were all turning around, trying to see which direction you were coming from. “Oof!” Luffy landed straight on his back, only processing what happened when he landed. You had run directly into him and knocked him over, now you were hovering right over him, heaving with a smile.

“I found something!” You breathed out, sitting back on your haunches, a little black book in your hands, “This book,” you started as Luffy pulled himself up a bit, holding himself up with his arms behind him, “has Roger’s route through the Grand Line. This might show us the path to follow so we can find the One Piece!” You exclaimed, practically shaking with excitement. Luffy beamed, throwing his arms around your neck and pulling you into a hug.

“Holy shit.” Zoro muttered, turning to Sanji, “We might actually be close to finding it.” He whispered, an astonished cook nodding as the only form of acknowledgment he’d offered.

You pulled back from the hug, standing up, hoisting Luffy up with you, “Where’s Nami? I wanna get this to her as soon as possible.” You asked, dusting yourself off a bit.

“She’s on the ship,” Zoro muttered, “I can take it to her,” he said, holding his hand out for the book.

“Hold on, marimo!” Sanji exclaimed, snatching the book out of his grasp, “You’d get lost before you find her.” He insisted, starting to walk toward the ship.

Zoro scoffed, “I don’t get lost!” he exclaimed, following close behind the cook.

You and Luffy were left alone in the woods, “You ready?” you asked quietly, reaching out and grabbing Luffy’s hand in your own.

“For what?” he asked, eyes locked on yours.

“Are you ready to be king?” you whispered, a massive smile pulling at your lips. “Monkey D. Luffy, King of the Pirates.” You said softly, trying it out on your tongue.

Luffy chuckled, starting to play with your fingers, “I think so.” He muttered, “Are you ready to be on the crew of the King of the Pirates?” he jeered through laughter.

Your smile was blinding as you beamed up at him, “Absolutely.” You said firmly. “Now c’mon, let’s see what else we can find.” You said, leading him in a new direction.

“Maybe Roger left a bit of-Woah!” you were cut off as the floor dropped out from under you. The island had booby traps. You were dangling from your hold on Luffy’s hand, trying to find footing against the damp earth of the hole’s walls. “What the fuck?” you exclaimed, and you could feel your hand slipping out of Luffy’s.

“Hold on!” he said. He chanced a look to the bottom of the hole, looking for spikes or something, only to blanch a bit. It was a bit worse depending on who you asked. The bottom was filled with seawater, and he couldn’t tell how deep it was, “Don’t let go!” Luffy commanded, stretching his free arm up to wrap around a tree, trying to use it as leverage to pull you out.

You dangled, kinda useless as you struggled to find any grip on anything really. “Maybe you can just drop me then grab the others and help me out then!” you suggested.

Luffy shook his head with wide eyes, “Seawater at the bottom.” he said as he started trying to pull you up, every muscle in his arm straining. It was much less a struggle because of you, and entirely because his feet kept slipping out from under him. “Shit.” He spat under his breath.

You swallowed a bit of fear at the pool of water under you, you held firm onto Luffy’s hand and used it as leverage to swing your free hand up, grabbing tightly onto Luffy’s forearm. “Reel yourself in!” you exclaimed, letting out a slightly manic laugh at your captain’s confused expression, “I’m like a damned fish! Your arm is the line! Reel your line in!” you shouted.

Luffy tightened his hold and tried pulling you both toward the tree, just using his arm, letting his feet drag under him. Eventually, you were high enough to reach a muddy hand out and grip the grass at the top, helping Luffy drag you up out of the hole.

You landed on the grass with a huff, adjusting your hat and laying right next to where Luffy fell on his back. His head was at your hip and vice versa. You wheezed a laugh and clapped a muddy hand on his abdomen, “Thanks, Cap!” Luffy waved you off, trying to catch his breath. You both sat up after a moment, and you took in how muddy you both really were with a sigh, “God damn, we need baths.” You muttered.

Luffy had caught his breath, but his heart kept beating wildly in his chest, “Don’t scare me like that.” He scolded.

You smiled softly and reached your hand up, moving his hair out of his eyes before resting your palm on his cheek, apologizing, and in that moment, Luffy saw what the guys had been talking about. The way you two looked at each other. The realization struck through Luffy like a lightning bolt, and he couldn’t think before he was grabbing your face and guiding your lips to his.

You gasped, making Luffy pull back for fear of upsetting you, “Sorry, I just-!” you cut off his worried rambling with a beaming smile, drawing him back in for another sweet kiss, your lips moving together a bit awkwardly, but neither of you minded. Luffy reached a hand up and threaded it through your hair at the back of your head, drawing you ever closer, and you held his face in your hands, smiling into the kiss.

Luffy pulled away just far enough to rest his forehead against yours, looking deep into your eyes, “You ever wanted to be a queen?” he muttered, eyes only leaving yours to flit down to your lips.

You smiled wide and laughed a bit, “I can work with that,” you whispered, pulling him back in for a kiss.

That night, you and Luffy sat on the lawn deck, his head in your lap, you were playing with his hair, twirling it around your fingers. You were humming softly as you both watched the stars, and Luffy recognized it as the slow song you played him on his birthday, making him smile.

“Fucking finally.” Zoro whispered, Sanji and Robin watching the scene with him. “I was this close to locking them in a broom closet.” He said, pinching his fingers together.

Robin chuckled softly, but Sanji frowned and shook his head, “I’m glad they figured things out,” Robin said, “Even if it took explicitly telling them.” The men laughed quietly, “Should I ask Franky to make them their own room?” she asked cheekily.

Zoro glowered, “If I walk in on them doing anything I think I’ll jump overboard.” He said, Sanji nodding along.

“I’ll tell him to make some plans, but I won’t have him do anything until they ask.” She decided, nodding resolutely. “Why don’t you and Franky have a room?” Zoro asked bluntly, ignoring Sanji’s kick to his shins.

The boys were surprised to see a very slight blush rise to the woman’s cheeks, “Who needs one when he has his own workshop.” She said bluntly, walking away immediately after.

Zoro and Sanji looked at each other in horror, “I’ve definitely gone in there without knocking before.” Zoro muttered.

“Am I the only one around here who can’t get any damned action?” Sanji whisper yelled.

Luffy stirred in your lap, reaching up a hand to thread his fingers with yours, “You make me happy.” He muttered, holding your hand over his chest.

You smiled and looked down at him, “You make me happy.” You said, drawing his hand in yours up, pressing his knuckles to your lips before letting them fall back to where Luffy had held them. “Now,” you said cheekily, biting back laughter, “Which one of us is gonna acknowledge your brother definitely celebrating in whatever pirate heaven he ended up in.” you said, the giggles leaking out, “And how pissed mine probably is right next to him.”

Luffy laughed quietly, reaching his free arm around your torso, still holding your hand with the other, “I swear, if he got any of his other stupid guesses right, I’m gonna freak out.” He warned jokingly.

You flushed and bit your lips, “We’ll just have to see.” You chimed, drawing Luffy’s face up to yours, whispering against his lips, “I mean, he can’t be all right. After all, you don’t have three years till you find that One Piece.” You said cheekily before pressing your lips together. Luffy chuckled into the kiss, tangling his hand into your hair.

[the-spindly-lady-faith]

Got A Minute?

word count: 1359 post date: 24-11-29 warning[s]: none except fluff and some angst summary: Who knew that the coldest man in Zaun could have such a soft spot for the right person? a/n: i still am not taking public requests, but this is a personal request for my pookie bear, using his oc

"to love, is to burn"

The Last Drop had been closed for close to an hour now, only four figures lingered about in silence, making minimal conversation that held no ground. A song started playing from the jukebox, Felicia smiling over her shoulder at the soft groan that was elicited from Vander's lips as he set down the last cup he was cleaning, giving a playful smile towards the purple haired woman. On the other end of the bar, were the other two male figures, locked in soft worded conversation with each other, their gazes equally soft.

"But why do all that work then, Silco?"

The man chuckled softly as he turned his head just slightly to gaze at the other.

"I choose to do it because I want you to be as comfortable as one can be down in Zaun. This you should know Tiny, my beloved"

Silco turned his head to the other two figures occupying the bar, after Vander had playfully swatted him with a hand towel. "Oi lovebirds, the lady has a special thing to let the lot of us"

Soon, the woman had the attention of the three men, a smile curling softly on her sharp lips, fingers gently holding onto the straw in her drink and stirring it slightly, her free hand traveling down to her stomach.

"I am pregnant."

As the years had passed, time grew to become less and less kind to the people in the undercity, and when the massacre on the bridge between Piltover and Zaun happened, whatever ties between the two cities, were shattered in an instant. Many good lives were lost fighting against the enforcers or trying to escape them, but the one that seemed to put the biggest dent in Silco & Vander's relationship, was Felicia's death. They blamed themselves and each other out of pure anger, and the once seemingly unbreakable bond between the two men, was nothing more than a ghost of a memory.

Vander stayed at The Last Drop, making a big name for himself after the attempted revolution. Vander was dubbed the protector for Zaun, the man to go to for help, or simply for a good drink. While Silco was left behind in the dark, to climb back up the ladder he had spent so long climbing up beside Vander. It did not take him long to reinvent himself in Zaun, becoming the all imposing leader over ever nook and corner in Zaun after he had created the seeming miracle that was 'Shimmer'.

Silco low-dosed himself daily with the shimmer, while he sold it out in large batches to interested parties around the world, not caring or asking much of their intentions with the monster drug. Silco sought out entire control of not just all of Zaun, but also all of Piltover, to show Vander that he were the mightier of the two. What had kept Silco grounded were two very special people in his life, his beloved, Tiny, and their adopted daughter, Jinx.

Tiny paced the familiar room of Silco's office, making conversation with Jinx who sat up on the supports of the roof, the both of them waiting for the same man, who they both expected to be angry. Displeased at best, they hoped. Just as Jinx was to begin telling Tiny of one of her latest inventions, the door slammed open and shut quickly, Silco angrily huffing with each breath as he dropped into his chair. He poured himself a glass of whisky, downing it just as quickly as he had poured, hardly noticing the approaching figures before him.

He turned the leather chair, his mismatched eyes meeting the dark brown ones of his beloved man, as he sat on the right armchair, fingers brushing through his salt-and-pepper hair with such softness that had Silco almost melting on the spot. The soft silence was broken as Jinx dropped down from the ceiling to sit on the desk, her pink eyes trained curiously on Silco, asking a question that didn't need to be spoken.

"...Firelights, again. Nothing like the airship incident, but its none the less upsetting. I lose good fucking business when they interfere with my shipments. Having to double the production of shimmer just to make up for what they destroyed"

Tiny sighed almost fondly, glancing to see Jinx staring back at him expectantly with the syringe of shimmer in hand, the man nodding gently in response, nudging Silco's head from his shoulder. A momentary shout of pain left Silco's lips, along with indiscernible curse words. He waved off Jinx, instructing her to lock the door on her way out. Silco waited a moment, hearing the soft click of the door lock, before finally and entirely melting into the arms of his dearest one.

"I have missed you every second we have been apart. Today has been less than satisfactory"

"You are here now. The day's previous hours no longer matter"

Tiny listened to Silco's words, responding with his own after, as he sat fully on the man's lap, letting him calm down and be as weak as he needed to be. The couple said nothing, preferring to rather just enjoy the rare silence and bask in the company the other offered. Tiny knew it was a rare moment for Silco to be so vulnerable, infront of him or not, but in the moments like this, it meant the whole world.

Silco's head rested where Tiny's collarbone went into the shoulder blade, inhaling a scent that was uniquely him, a soft yet dark woody scent, the utmost beautifully subtly scent of lavender mix with the musky scent of burning firewood, and the scent of the undercity that everyone carried with them. For even just that moment, it was only them in the world, they could finally just be and not have to put up a front of survival, they could just be weak in each others presence. Every moment they had like this was a moment deeply cherished, these moments rarely seen for them, and it was what kept Silco going for this long.

"I have many long thoughts about you my darling. I think that I am undeserving of a man such as yourself. You have watched me becoming this monster. This disfigured... creature, and you still love me all the same as those years ago." Silco's voice was softer than he himself could ever remember it being, but Tiny's presence often did that to him.

For a moment or three, Tiny was silent as he too inhaled the scent that was uniquely Silco. A distinct sharpness from his cigars, the burn of alcohol, a rather expensive cologne, as like himself, the familiar musk of the undercity.

"...We unfortunately were dealt the worst cards in the entire deck. Life has never been kind to us, not while living here, no matter how much you try. You rebuilt yourself Silco, you became new again in a place where it is so hard to be new. You took your cards of life, and made them something extraordinary. I truly think you are the only person in all of Zaun to have so successfully pulled off the creation of shimmer."

For only a brief moment, Silco softened more in the other man's arms, but he did not let that side show for too long. There were still parts of him he wasn't ready to let Tiny see, and he didn't know if they would ever be seen. After yet another brief silence, Tiny poured another glass of whisky and handed it towards Silco.

"Finish this, forget about work, forget about shimmer. Forget about all of that. Call Jinx and maybe even Sevika over and... I'll make the lot of us food. It may not be the best thing you've ever tasted, but it will be food. I promise"

A soft chuckle brushed past Silco's lips, the warm air softly tickling the skin of Tiny's neck, as he slipped from Silco's lap and made way for the door, Silco's voice stopping him for only a moment.

"For you, I would do anything. I would even set fire to this whole world."

[sleepyowlwrites]

writing prompts! lyrics: ordinary magic and delight edition

Paper wings and silly things we wore, paper wings and silly things we swore (Snowbird - EllaHarp)

Bounded by the gravity, of all the other dreams that I was given (In the Kitchen - Mree)

Walk out into the sultry evening, cotton breathing when the sea winds brush the hair down around your neck (Savannah - Relient K)

Remember laughing when the days were long and summer was a never ending fire (All You Are - John Mark Nelson)

Chasing all the things that are keeping us young, we won't stop running 'til we reach the sun (Woodland - The Paper Kites)

There's something 'bout the way you the city when the lights come up as the sun goes down (Nightlife - Old Daisy)

The smell of old cedar and jasmine perfume, fig trees, bottles of milk, and sewing machines (Clay & Cast Iron - Darlingside)

My hope was just in season and that's the truth of it (A La La - Jukebox the Ghost)

The accent in your voice, and all the words you use, I like the way you talk, I love you (The Drums - Tanya Davis)

Something 'bout May makes it all feel better, baby, Summerland holds what I want right now (Summerland - half•alive)

A wild world sharpens its claws, as the nightfire burns, the shadows fade, and at the blush of dawn we'll be okay (Nightfire - Juniper Vale)

Like the angels in the submarine, we'll hold water with our weighted wings (Cassiopeia - Anju)

The universe is an open door, a cosmic retreat beneath my bedroom floor (Starry Eyed - Linus from the Stars)

We were young, I used my paper telescope to show you the stars and then win your heart (Make This Leap - The Hunts)

Oh the places you'll go, with your eyes so wide, with your heart in your hand and your sword at your side (Ih the Places You'll Go - I Fight Dragons)

One time I shook hands with a pirate, he gave me a map to all his gold (Long Way Down - eleventyseven)

When the owls call the breathless moon in the blue veil of the night, the shadows of the trees appear, amidst the lantern light (The Mummers' Dance - Loreena McKennitt)

I'll send a storm to capture your heart and bring you home, oh carried on a breeze, you'll never find me gone (Storm Song - PHILDEL)

Let's stay awake and listen to the dark, before the birds, before they all wake up (Birds - Emiliana Torrini)

If you'll be my star, I'll be your sky, you can hide underneath me and come out at night (Boats & Birds - Gregory and the Hawk)

Give me the song inside your soul, give me the words to sing along (Hold Us Together - WILD)

I was there when the rain tapped the way down your face, you were a miracle, I was just holding your space (Big Black Car - Gregory Alan Isakov)

'Til the stars all fall down, they empty from the sky, but I don't mind, if you're with me, everything's alright (Everything's Alright - Laura Shigihara)

We're far from home, will you come to me, oh weary soul, we can make it through it (Untitled - The Lighthouse and the Whaler)

The darker the night, the brighter the stars ( Sweeter the Heart - Julian Moon)

[craftyworx]

!!when you get this, list 5 songs you like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to the last 10 people in your notifs (positivity is cool!!)

:3

WHOAAA HIII!! OMG TYSM <3333

Everyday - Bo en Pied Piper - CG5 3 o'clock things - AJR Normalize - Mother Mother Hold it in - Jukebox the Ghost Everything at Once - Lenka Who am I - Caleb Hyles The Hour of Joy - Mob Entertainment Tom's Diner - Suzanne Vega (ITS SO GOOD) God-ish - Will Stetson

[possum-quesadilla]

THE FULL OUTLINE FOR LONELY REMNANTS / CORPSEJUICE IS COMPLETE…. Now to just keep writing the actual damn thing…

I thought it would be eight chapters but it’s going to be twelve if you include the epilogue :,)

Here are the names and songs for each chapter, these are subject to change! If you wanna be completely totally in the dark, I’ll put them in a ‘read more’ so they can be avoided

- Chapter 1 songs: title song (“Ocean Breathes Salty” by Modest Mouse), “Friends In Low Places” by Worthikids, “Go to the Light” by Murder By Death, “Under My Skin” by Jukebox The Ghost, “You’re Dead” by Norma Tanega (for vibes), “Lost” by Amanda Palmer, “Lonesome Town” by Ricky Nelson, “Cut You A Piece” from 35mm, “I Will Always Think of You” from “BoJack Horseman, “Today Today” by Jack Stauber.

- Chapter 2: “I wish I'd find all the lonely remnants, Of you that left when your head cracked open” from “Coma Baby” by Nicole Dollanganger (woah! Guys it’s the title!!). Songs: title song, “Will You Remember?” by The Cranberries, “Sleepwalk” by Forrest Day.

- Chapter 3: “I'll save you from that fate, If I have to kill every angel in Heaven, I will snatch you back from the grave, And you will live to see my bed another day” from “Over the Moon” by Penelope Scott (thanks Cosmo <3 ) (No songs currently other than the title…)

- Chapter 4: “Didn't give me time to say goodbye in the way that I wanted to, So honey, close your eyes and stay like you're supposed to do” from “Pigeon” by Cavetown. Songs: title song, “A Mask of my Own Face” by Lemon Demon.

- Chapter 5: “Now you remember where you came from, Now you remember where you’re going, You’ve got to keep it flowing” from “Spiral of Ants” by Lemon Demon. Songs: title song, “Danny” by Nicole Dollanganger, “Here Before” by Vashti Bunyan, “Meteor Shower” by Cavetown, “Soap” by Penelope Scott.

- Chapter 6: “But you see, It’s not me, It’s not my family” from “Zombie” by The Cranberries. Songs: title song, “STRAIGHT DOWN” by Worthikids, “Lifetime Achievement Award” by Lemon Demon, “Army Dreamers” by Kate Bush, “Everything Moves” by Bronze Radio Return, “Memento Mori” by Crywank, “What Did You Do” by Jack Stauber.

- Chapter 7: “My body’s made of crushed little stars, And I’m not doing anything, I wanna see the whole world” from “My Body’s Made of Crushed Little Stars” by Mitski (guys I promise I tried to limit the amount of mitski… at least there’s no Jack Stauber bc I’m so strong). Songs: title song, “Remember My Name” by Mitski, “The Wolf” by SIAMES.

- Chapter 8: “Hey, Would it be so bad if I stayed? I’m just a ghost out of his grave” from “Ghosting” by Mother Mother. Songs: title song, “Love Will” by Jack Stauber, “dead girl in the pool.” by girl in red, “Body” by Mother Mother, “It Will Come Back” by Hozier.

- Chapter 9: “But in the end if I lose my voice, Will you forget about your love for me? But I still hold out hope that someday, I’ll be worth more than the silence left in my way” from “Canary in a Coal Mine” by The Crane Wives. Songs: title song, “Amen” by Amber Run.

- Chapter 10: “Wildfires have been eating you inside my head, Trying to smoke you out, Or burn you alive in it” from “Please Just Stay Dead” by Nicole Dollanganger. Songs: title song, “I Will Never Forget” by Kimya Dawson, “Howl” by Florence + The Machine, “Kitchen Fork” by Jack Conte, “Sense, Sensibility” by AJJ, “Putting The Dog To Sleep” by The Antlers, “My Name is Carnival” by Stranded Horse, “Rule #21 - Momento Mori” by Fish in a Birdcage, “The Apology Song” from “The Book of Life”.

- Chapter 11: “Villain and violent, Infant and innocent, Baby, both arms cradle you now” from “forwards beckon rebound” by Adrianne Lenker. Songs: title song, “Howl” by The Family Crest, “Small Red Boy” by AJJ, “Let Us Adore You” from “Steven Universe”, “The Bed Song” by Amanda Palmer, “Today Today” by Jack Stauber AGAIN.

- Chapter 12, epilogue: “And maybe we'll get lucky and we'll both grow old, Well, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I hope so” from “Ocean Breathes Salty” by Modest Mouse (oh shit like chapter one!! That’s crazy). Songs: title song, “Nothing Man” by Sodikken, more to come!

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Okay I'm not saying that I routinely imagine a jukebox musical of Othello using Florence + the Machine music but I'm not not saying that if that were to happen these would be the perfect songs:

THIS IDEA ORIGINALLY CAME FROM 'LUCY'S STUDY ACCOUNT <3' ON TIKTOK AND SHE HAS HER OWN FULL VERSION ON THERE THAT INCLUDES OTHER ARTISTS THIS WAS MY TAKE INSPIRED BY HER SUGGESTIONS OF 100 YEARS AND I'M NOT CALLING YOU A LIAR BECAUSE I HAVE PRETTY MUCH NOT STOPPED THINKING ABOUT IT SINCE I SAW HER VIDEO - I highly recommend checking out her list as well, I very much enjoyed it :)

100 Years

I believe in you and in our hearts we know the truth and I believe in love and the darker it gets the more I do. Try to fill us with your hate and we will shine a light, and the days will become endless and never, and never turn to night

And Lord don't let me break this, let me hold it lightly, give me arms to pray with instead of ones that hold too tightly

I let him sleep, and as he does my breath fills the room with love, hurts in ways I can't describe, my heart bends and breaks so many, many times

Hubris is a bitch

I'm Not Calling You A Liar (A duet between Othello and Desdemona and then a reprise when she dies would be amazing)

I'm not calling you a liar, just don't lie to me. I'm not calling you a thief, just don't steal from me. I'm not calling you a ghost, just stop haunting me. And I love you so much I'm gonna let you kill me

Which Witch (This screams Emilia weighing up her guilt for betraying Desdemona and her inability to say no to Iago because of everything he's done to her/her position in the relationship being so dangerous)

And it's my whole heart, deemed and delivered a crime, I'm on trial waiting 'til the beat comes out, I'm on trial waiting 'til the beat comes out who's a heretic now?

I'm not beaten by this yet you can't tell me to regret been in the dark since the day we met, fire help me to forget

Chained and shackled, oh, I'll unravel, oh, it's a pity, oh. Never to return, but I never learn, it's a pity, oh. Chained and shackled, oh, I'll unravel, oh, it's a pity oh. Say I won't return, but I never learn, it's a pity oh.

Queen of Peace (I'm imagining a Desdemona solo and maybe some chorus as well but I'd love to see her with this song, I'm picturing it to be after Othello hits her)

Suddenly I'm overcome, dissolving like the setting sun, like a boat into oblivion, 'cause your driving me away. Now you have me on the run, the damage is already done, come on is this what you want? 'cause your driving me away

Oh, the queen of peace, always does her best to please. Is it any use? Somebody's gotta lose. Like a long scream, out there always echoing. Oh, what is it worth? All that's left is hurt

And my love is no good against the fortress that it made of you, blood is running deep, sorrow that you keep

Big God (Okay hear me out: A three way split stage with Emilia and Iago, Desdemona and Othello, and Bianca and Cassio; all sing but mostly the women each singing different parts of this song to their respective partners)

Okay I feel like this one needs a little more explanation but for example

Women: You need a big god, big enough to hold your love. You need a big god, big enough to fill you up

Bianca: You keep me up at night, to my messages you do not reply

Desdemona: You know I still like you the most

All: the best of the best and the worst of the worst

Emilia: You can never know, the places that I go.

Desdemona: You know I still like you the most

Men: You'll always be my favourite ghost

And yes I can see the perfect choreography in my head

All This And Heaven Too (Desdemona singing this to Othello!?? I can also see it being a duet for them, but then with a harmony from Emilia as well singing alone but theoretically to Desdemona)

And the heart is hard to translate, it has a language of its own. It talks in tongues and quiet sighs, and prayers and proclamations, in the grand days of great men, in the smallest of gestures, in short, shallow gasps

And the words are all escaping, and coming back all damaged. And I would put them back in poetry, if I only knew how, I can't seem to understand it. And I would give all this and heaven too, I would give it all if only for a moment that I could just understand the meaning of the word you see, 'cause I've been scrawling it forever, but it never makes sense to me

Back In Town (Okay I don't know how to explain but I'm imagining Iago and Emilia alone on stage as he sings to her with very close choreography in a way that at a glance they could just be together but if you watch properly he's controlling her movements)

I'm back in town, why don't we go out? Let the rats spin around our feet, the full moon shines down on these dirty streets. Back in town, why don't we go out, to that ninth street diner? And carry on slowly, torturing each other

If you get spat on it's just your big city baptism, you're the star of the show. I'm back in town, why don't we go out and never go to sleep? Throw our dreams out, let them pile up on the streets

'Cause it's always the same. I came for the pleasure but I stayed, yes I stayed, for the pain

Falling (The Bianca vibes are undeniable, but also with the fallen from grace idea it has such potential to start as her singing and then gradually include more characters as it goes)

I've fallen out of favour and I've fallen from grace, fallen out of trees and I've fallen on my face. Fallen out of taxis, out of windows too, fell in your opinion when I fell in love with you

I could probably think of more if I put my mind to it but this is all for now, please add more if you think of any I'd love to see them!

[shrineofprophecy]

𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐄 .

Share at least 5 songs that you associate with or remind you of your muse!

Brave Shine - Aimer

How can I destroy my weakness? ‘Cause I wanna be stronger / I need to keep them all safe, but I lack the power / If we learn to wield our flaws, then the future will be ours / BRAVE SHINE / If you need a hand to hold, then STAY THE NIGHT / On the darkest of my days YOU SAVED MY LIFE

2. I love rock 'n' roll - Joan Jett & The Blackhearts

The beat was going strong, playing my favorite song / I could tell it wouldn't be long 'till he was with me / Yeah me / Singing I love rock and roll / So put another dime in the jukebox baby / I love rock and roll / So come and take your time and dance with me

3. X - Chungha

The picture that had no room for me / I stared at it for a long time / Couldn't piece together back then / Those sad pieces are now sharp blades / With sharpened knife, I cut away / The scars of you that followed me like a ghost / Filled up clean with new flesh / Like nothing ever happened

4. Breakaway - Kelly Clarkson

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly / I'll do what it takes 'til I touch the sky / And I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change / And break away / Out of the darkness and into the sun / I won't forget all the ones that I love (I gotta) / Take a risk, take a chance, make a change / And break away

5. Journey - WOODZ

When I walk through this door / Far beyond on the endless road / Will there be the sun shining down on me / So I’m ready to journey again / I might lose myself when I leave but / Deep inside my heart, on my little island / Is where I have kept myself intact

Tagged by: @aventvrina (thank you!) Tagging: @avaere (robin), @iiryoku (sunday), @duelmarks, @sagnaevi and you!

[haveyoulistenedtothisalbum-poll]

Tracklist:

Good Day • Hold It In • Beady Eyes on the Horizon • Under My Skin • Miss Templeton's 7000th Dream • Static • Victoria • My Heart's the Same • Lighting Myself on Fire • Fire in the Sky • Where Are All the Scientists Now? • A Matter of Time

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