#song for today: blackout
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pardonmydelays · 1 year ago
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IN THE HEIGHTS countdown: 12 DAYS!
song for today:
look at the fireworks look at the fireworks fly light up the night sky
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zawm-b · 7 months ago
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i love writing my evil schemes in my cute little diary with cherries and a house on it like yes im scheming and yes my scheming has to be pretty
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thatoneluckybee · 1 year ago
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Update several hours later the warrior cat song is still stuck in my head. It's. It's a different song this time though. My brain is cycling through them.
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burreauxsss · 2 months ago
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couldve been her
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background: y/n a wag for the chiefs who is dating travis kelce of 3 years finds out he cheated on her. she assures herself that she'd never watch the nfl nor date another nfl player, until a convincing quarterback hits her dms.
(all pics from pinterest)
synopsis: week 5 of the season and y/n decides to break the silence on the cheating between her and travis, in return several chiefs fans make her feel like she couldve just stayed for the money.
notes: linked the song below, also in the playlist in the series. a short ish chapter? before i start plotting for this other idea i have.
FYI I DONT KNOW WHY THE MESSAGES IN THIS CHAPTER ARE BLURRY.
warning: proofread while drowsy?
joe burrow x reader x kelce!ex au
y/n_handle posted a story
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caption: back home 💆🏾‍♀️
joeyb_9
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❤️ 737,010 💬 99,998
Liked by: y/n_handle bengals lahjay_10 and others
joeyb_9: keep fighting.
y/n_handle: so lucky. 😌
joeyb_9: y/n_handle you are my lucky charm mamas.
lahjay_10: get a room. for everyones sake.
yourbsf: lahjay_10, for our sake please.
username_1: just fell to my knees at joe's comment..
username_2: atleast she isnt with travis because he never liked her posts or reposted them like joe does!!
username_3: mamas??? joe what are we doing.
*load more comments*
tmz
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❤️ 2.5m 💬 120,000
Liked by: y/n_handle bengals lahjay_10 and others
tmz: breakup clarity? y/n y/ln former chiefs wag ended up speaking out on a podcast about the cheating incident.
y/n states "i found out because of mutual friends, it wasn't because of anyone in my dms. i was loyal, i was never loved. i wanted to be loved, i wanted to be there for him and not the money. but everything doesn't work out the way we want it to. i've now found someone who loves me, thankfully majority of everyone respects it. they do think its outrageous though."
y/ln is officially dating cincinnati bengals quarterback joe burrow, more info on our website.
username_4: travis just sounds dumb sometimes, how are you going to say she downgraded when she pulled the hottest dude in the nfl?
username_5: this is why we love any other team but the chiefs.
username_6: wasnt burrow already in her dms when they were together?
username_7: y/n cheated first. and im convinced by that.
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y/n_handle
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❤️ 145,299 💬 40,189
Liked by: joeyb_9 yourbsf and others
y/n_handle: girls night out ✨
yourbsf: not you posting like you didnt blackout after this.. y/n_handle: who is me?
username_8: the exposing lmao..
username_9: those drinks look good.
username_10: we're proud of you for revealing everything.
username_11: ms shiesty!! come to the home game this weekend.
joeyb_9: fyi, same woman who also called me while drunk. y/n_handle: shut up.
joeyb_9: ill take back that telfar, dont play with me. y/n_handle: okay.. love you.
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bengals
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❤️ 808,000 💬 77,112
Liked by: lahjay_10 y/n_handle and others
bengals: livin' in the fast lane
#BALvsCIN
username_12: joe's so fine bro username_13: he has a girlfriend unfortunately
username_14: is ms shiesty coming to the game today????
username_15: that hand though-
y/n_handle: ill just stay quiet 🥸
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y/n_handle 📍kansas city, missouri
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❤️ 101,922 💬 3,984
Liked by: yourbsf and others
y/n_handle: 💆🏾‍♀️
username_16: baby joe doesnt comment on your posts alot, you shouldve stayed for the bills.
username_17: nfl players pay alot, just saying.
username_18: she shouldve lowkey shut her mouth.
username_19: as long as he comes home, what harm is there in doing it?
*load more comments*
bengals
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❤️ 1.1m 💬 287,934
Liked by: y/n_handle and others
bengals: bengals dub!
username_20: defense sucks so badly joe is used to it.
username_21: we almost lost. that was a prayer.
username_22: im gonna need joe to stop daydreaming about travis kelces ex and put up numbers next game. y/n_handle: now whos fault was that? not mine.
username_23: same dude that is currently screwing travis's ex guys.
username_24: we have below 500 teams for the next 2 weeks.
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y/n_handle
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❤️ 332,140 💬 2,789
Liked by: joeyb_9 yourbsf lululemon and others
y/n_handle: gold on ice.
lululemon: ate down!
yourbsf: love this combo girl.
joeyb_9: mamas pretty. y/n_handle: thank you ml.
username_26: ate tf up.
username_27: lululemon responded..
username_28: shes pretty and she upgraded?
username_29: i wanna be her when i get older.
*load more comments*
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notes: as of proofreading this, im taking myself to bed. goodnight.
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nialls-golf-putt · 5 months ago
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You Say It Tastes Like Candy
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Niall thinks you just woke up in a really really good mood. He's in for a hell of a ride.
c/w: face riding, a hint of come eating and blowjobs ;) just a fluffy silly little smutty bit
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
You rolled over in bed, burying your face under the duvet. The sun was shining in your face. Why was- Niall must've forgotten to pull the blackouts last night, you realised sleepily.
And no matter how much you tried, you just couldn't fall back asleep. Stifling a yawn, you sat up in bed, watching the sunlight pouring in through the sheer curtains.
Niall was still fast asleep, curled up sideways with his head on his hands, knees bent with his hair falling over his forehead. You pressed a soft kiss to his forehead, brushing the hair back. "Morning, Ni." You whispered, to which he grumbled something sleepily, turning his back to the curtains, and also- you.
So much for a romantic morning. Shaking your head to yourself, you pulled the covers off, ignoring his sleepy protests as you settled between his legs.
"Niall," You said in a soft sing-song voice, pressing kisses along his thighs, fingers playing along the waistband of his boxers.
"Mmph?" He mumbled sleepily, head now buried under his pillow.
Wasting no time, smirking to yourself, you slowly pressed your lips to the bulge through the thin fabric, eliciting an instant response from him (which you couldn't make out either, but sounded suspiciously like 'no fair babe').
Thank god for morning wood, you chuckled to yourself as you left open-mouthed kisses along his hip bones, following the trail of hair and tugging at the elastic with your teeth, to which he quickly obligingly raised his hips.
Men. You couldn't help but chuckle against his skin, goosebumps spreading at your warm breath as you pulled down his boxers, Niall bending one knee to help it off, spreading further to give you the space you needed.
You kept your eyes on him, smiling slightly to yourself as you dipped your head down, tongue darting out in kitten licks along his head, already angry red and weeping with precum.
You flattened your tongue, savouring the bitter feel of it, licking a broad stripe up from his balls, pausing at the spot under his head you knew he loved, keeping your tongue pointed as you drew patterns along the silky skin.
"Babe-" He whined softly.
"Mhm?" You asked, not taking your mouth off of him, pressing featherlight kisses along the underside of his cock, tracing the vein on your way up.
"'S today somethin' I'm forgetting-?" He asked groggily, lifting his head up slightly to look down at you before breaking off with a loud moan as you ducked your head down, swallowing him down halfway before popping off. You slowly wrapped your fingers around his now slick length, giving him a few slow firm pumps.
"Not that I know of." You hummed, hollowing your cheeks as you took him in again, hand wrapped around the base, squeezing gently.
"Bloody hell- 'S a damn good way to- fuck- wake up, then." He choked out as he looked down at you, his breath coming out in sharp gasps already, pupils blown wide.
You hummed softly around him, knowing it drove him crazy when you did, fingers dancing along his balls teasingly as you kept up the slow movements. His fingers were in your hair in no time, gripping tightly at the nape of your neck as he guided you, doing his best to not buck his hips up into your mouth.
"Fuck- Your mouth feels so fuckin' good, princess," He groaned out, grip tightening on your head as he held you down for a few seconds, letting out a string of expletives as he hit the back of your throat.
"That's it, fuck, you're so pretty when you're on your knees- oh, bloody-" He broke off with a deep moan, his hands gripping your hair so tightly you were certain you felt it pulled at the roots.
You couldn't help but smirk at his reactions, your grip on him tightening, enjoying the way his body responded to every flick of your tongue and touch of your hands. You glanced up at him, taking in his hair already clinging to his forehead, eyes scrunched shut, his lips parted with silent moans before you quickly popped off him, wiping your chin with your palm.
"Hey!" Niall protested immediately, his eyes flying open. "Princess, what the fuck?" He whined, all but pouting at you as he made grabby hands towards you where you were sitting back on your heels between his legs.
"I was so closeee." He said, making puppy eyes up at you but you shook your head, crawling towards the headboard. His eyes watched your every move, biting his lip to stifle a whimper as you pulled off the tshirt you wore to bed, leaving you clad only in your panties.
"Be patient, Ni." You said with a small smirk. "Good things come to those who wait," You said with a soft laugh, echoing what he always told you when he was in a teasing mood, leaving you whining and frustrated. It felt good to be on the other side for once.
Ignoring his grumbles, you slowly pulled off your underwear, smiling inwardly as you saw the glimmer in his eyes for a second as you straddled his waist. "You just had to ask, babe-" He started cockily, and you giggled as you saw the smug expression slip off his face as you slowly moved up, carefully putting your knees on either side of his shoulders.
"Oh"
That was all he said for a few seconds, his hands gripping your thighs, eyes riveted to your face.
"Get to work, Horan." You said with a soft laugh, wiggling your hips playfully.
He raised his eyebrow, face still turned up at you.
"Don't make me ask again, Ni."
"Do I atleast get to know what I did, cause there's always-"
"No. Later." You said, biting the inside of your cheek to stifle your smile.
"Yes, ma'am." He said, chuckling softly before he took a deep breath, wasting no time at all as he flattened his tongue, laving it along your slit, humming at the taste of your arousal. He darted along the sides, licking up stripes with his tongue pointed, pulling you down onto his face, his nose brushing your clit.
"If you're gonna sit on my face at least do it properly." He mumbled muffled against you, and you bit your lip as you felt the vibrations through you.
He kept his grip firm, fingers digging into your thighs as his tongue moved with finesse, darting along your swollen bud, teeth grazing against it for a second as you let out a loud moan, bracing yourself on the headboard, your hips grinding forward instinctively.
He groaned at the movement, urging you on, the vibrations causing you to whimper even louder, lightheaded already as he moved his tongue just the way you liked it, mumbling muffled praises against you.
"Niall, fuck, I-" You bit your lip, letting out a sound between a whine and a whimper as he teasingly let his tongue circle your entrance, dipping in just enough to leave you desperate for more.
His hands traced up your sides, cupping your breasts as you moved against his tongue, his stubble scratching ever so slightly at your skin. He pinched down on a nipple, rolling the hardened nub, moaning in satisfaction against you as it pebbled under his touch.
He kneaded at the flesh desperately, his other hand firm on your waist as his tongue finally slipped into you.
You gripped desperately at the headboard, the only thing grounding you as his hands danced over your body, playing with your arse as he built up a steady pace, his tongue fucking into you deliciously, curling it just right to press against the right spots, his nose nudging your clit every so often as you could feel your thighs starting to shake, the familiar knot tightening in your belly.
"Ni- Babe-" You whimpered out, trying to form a sentence as he squeezed at your flesh, fingers digging in and you instinctively leaned back, hand trailing along his abs, following the trail of hair as you grasped him, precum dripping down his entire length as you began stroking him in time with his tongue, his moan sending shockwaves through your body.
You couldn't even control the movement of your hips, grinding shamelessly against his mouth. Niall reached up, tracing his path along your breasts and waist down to your ass before giving you a firm smack, the sheer surprise of it more than anything sending you over the edge, waves of pleasure passing through you, your toes tingling as you rode out your orgasm, feeling like your knees were giving out on you.
Vaguely, you were aware of his own hips jerking against your hands, his warm come splattering all over your hand and his stomach as he caught his breath against you, tapping your thigh after a few seconds.
Chest still heaving, you slowly climbed off him, flopping down next to him. You brought your hand up to your mouth, licking off some of the warm come before holding it out in front of his mouth, trailing your damp fingers along his lips as he quickly captured your fingers in his mouth, making quick work of it, pressing a kiss to the fingertips before he let go.
You slowly lifted your head up, wiping your arousal off his glistening chin with your palm, chuckling slightly to yourself as he caught your hand, licking it clean again. "You're insatiable, Ni."
He laughed softly, trailing kisses up to your wrist as he looked at you. "Can't deny the allegations."
You exhaled softly, closing your eyes as you laid down beside him again.
"You know," He said, his voice hoarse. "If that's your idea of being all strict and punishing me, I wouldn't mind you punishing me daily."
"Shut up," You giggled, fondly swatting his chest.
"Can I at least now know what i did, though?" He asked, pulling you into his side as he carded his fingers through your hair.
"You forgot to pull the curtains last night." You murmured, nuzzling into the crook of his neck.
"That's it!?" He said, with a soft incredulous laugh.
"What do you mean that's it?" You asked, unable to not laugh along. "The sun got in my eyes and woke me up- And then you turned your back to me when i tried to be all sweet and wake you up."
"Oh no no- Don't give me that." Niall said playfully. "There were no sweet intentions behind waking me up- It was all personal vendetta- 'I woke up so now he will too'."
"Was not!" You protested, laughing.
"It so was."
"There'll so definitely be a round two for that." You said, fake stern, giggling slightly.
"Get some breakfast in me, princess, and I'll do it twice." Niall grinned.
"Oh you're so on"
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
A/n: Send an ask if you wanna be on my taglist <3 reblogs and comments hugely loveddd and here's my masterlist!
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springseasonie · 2 years ago
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Blackout | KDY (M)
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Established relationship, Fiance Doyoung x fem reader
Summary: The powerful storm outside knocks your power out even though Doyoung assured you it would be fine. Luckily, he bought candles the day before just in case this happened. But even with the candles to light the dark house, you were still a bit anxious about the storm, so Doyoung decided to distract you for a bit
Warnings: sexual content, unprotected sex, breeding kink, softer dynamic, fluff (I think idk), proofread but may still be errors
Word count: 3,2k
Song recs: get you by Daniel Caesar
A/N: wrote this listening to the cutest kpop gg music you could imagine. Literally listening to achoo by lovelyz rn (stream) please lmk if I missed any warnings. Feedback is loved and appreciated
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"Are you sure everything will be fine out there? It's looking pretty serious." You stood by the window of your living room staring outside at the storm.
"Well I don't know for sure, but what I do know is that you shouldn't stand near the window like that." Doyoung grabbed your arm pulling you away from the window. "It's night time so hopefully nothing too crazy happens. Are all the flashlights up here?"
"Yeah." You turned to Doyoung who put his hands on his hips with a concentrated expression. He was always so cute like that. "Babe, we're gonna be okay. There's no need to-"
The room went completely silent as your vision was impaired with the sudden blackout. All that you could see was the trees moving in the strong wind and power lines flying in different directions. You pulled your phone out of your pocket, turning on the flashlight to see in front of you.
"Babe? You still there," you said loudly, looking around.
"Yeah I'm just getting the flashlights and candles," he called from the kitchen.
"I didn't even know we had candles," you laugh.
"I bought them yesterday just in case." You pointed your phone in the direction of the kitchen, seeing him walk back with his hands and arms full. He placed all the stuff on the coffee table with a big sigh. "Wanna help me light them?"
"Of course." You sat on the floor next to him between the couch and the table. Doyoung handed you a lighter and the two of you started lighting the candles "you're always so prepared."
"In life, you always think 3 steps ahead." He placed the candle in the candle holder, carefully putting it on the table. Doyoung reached to pick up another one, but was distracted by how pretty you looked in the lowlight. Your features were soft, and the way you picked up everything was delicate.
You turned to ask him something, but was quickly humored when you caught him staring at you. Doyoung looked away from you super flustered by it. His cheeks turned a bright shade of pink, making him cover his face. You snickered as he whined in his hands from the embarrassment. Even after dating him for so long, he was still embarrassed like a middle schooler.
"Don't be embarrassed," you teased, poking him softly. "you're so cute, you know that?"
Doyoung groaned, earning a soft laugh from you. "stop, it's embarrassing."
"It's not." You continued lighting candles listening to the rain pick up outside. You set it down before turning to Doyoung who was still hiding his face. You ruffled your hands in his hair knowing that would be the only thing to make him come back to you.
"Don't mess up my hair, I spent so much time on it today," he whined, moving your hand gently.
"It still looks good. Looks like the aftermath of a long week," you said, winking at him. Doyoung, who was already flustered enough, gave you nervous laughter. "You know..these candles are kind of romantic."
"You think so," he asked, a small smile on his face. He stood up m, taking 2 candles with him setting up the room.
"Mhm," you answer. You finished lighting the rest of the candles and stood up to help Doyoung put them around the first floor. "Maybe we should be romantic while we have the chance," you laugh.
"Do you think we're still gonna have to work tomorrow?"
"Hopefully not. Hopefully a tree falls in the middle of the street. Okay…I'm all done." You turn to Doyoung who was finishing up the candles right along with you. The room looked nice and lit up like this. It reminded you of a room in a dark academia movie with all the books and papers lying around. Doyoung looked good in the low light too. The slight silhouette of his body in front of the candles was so pretty. He was so pretty, and it was starting to do things to you.
You and Doyoung sat on the couch together snuggled into one another under the throw blanket. You nuzzled your head between his neck, inhaling his cologne that you loved so much. You felt Doyoung tense up a bit, squeezing you closer into him as the storm picked up. He knew you didn't like storms very much, and you were starting to get a lot more anxious as time went on.
"You okay," he said quietly.
You nodded, planting a small kiss on his jawline. "It's getting really bad out there."
"I know," he said, kissing your forehead. "Don't worry about the storm, okay? I'm here."
"I know I shouldn't worry…but what if the tree in the backyard falls or the one across the street? What if-"
Doyoung turned your head to face him and kissed you deeply. He cupped your face, stroking your cheek with his thumb. You pulled away from him, looking up at him with adoration. He was always so sweet, never wanting you to worry about a thing.
"Don't worry about what's going on outside," he said quietly.
"Well, now I can't worry about anything because of you." You smiled, glancing at his dimly lit lips. "I think we should take advantage of this romantic setting. What do you think?"
"I think you're right." Doyoung smiled before kissing you again, capturing your lips in a heated exchange. You kiss him back, moaning softly into his mouth. Your hand finds its way to his chest, holding his shirt softly.
"I bet you were thinking about this all day," he mumbled against your lips.
His voice was so deep and raspy and you could hear the smirk in his statement. It gave you butterflies, and they immediately went right to your core. You wanted to just kiss him for the time being, just in case something bad happened outside or inside. But the way he was kissing you, the way his fingers softly glided on your arm - you needed him.
"Do you think you can distract me some more," you mumbled. You pulled away from his lips, kissing his face softly. You could feel his beard growing back and still smell the expensive skin care he loved.
"It's almost like you read my mind."
You and Doyoung move yourselves on the couch, him under you and you on top of him. Doyoung could never get over the way you looked at him. It made him feel warm and fuzzy. Not once have you even made him feel unwanted or unloved, and he hoped that it would stay that way forever.
"You're staring again," you giggle softly.
"I know." Doyoung took one of your hands and clasped them with his, squeezing it tight. "You're so beautiful."
"Don't get sentimental on me," you whine softly, but the smile on your lips was wide. You always got shy when he started complimenting you out of the blue. Doyoung was big on words of affirmation. He always had to tell you that he loves you, or anything that showed his love for you in general. You loved it because no one ever made you feel as special as he did.
"I'm not being sentimental, I'm just telling you." Doyoung kissed the back of your hand, making you even more flustered than before. "But I'll stop talking because I know you just want my dick in you."
"You didn't have to put it that way," you laugh. You leaned down, kissing him softly. Doyoung placed his other hand on your thigh, squeezing the flesh softly. Doyoung let go of your hand and placed both of them on your hips. Unconsciously, you started to grind on top of him, lips never leaving his. His hands followed your movements, pushing his hips up to get more friction.
The sound of the rain breathing the windows created the perfect white noise for you to put your focus on him. You pulled away from him, leaning lower to kiss his neck.
"God, I love you so much," he sighed.
"I know you do." You came up and pulled your shirt above your head, throwing it on the floor in front of the couch. You reached to your back, unclipping your bra. Doyoung's gaze never left your body, watching as the fabric fell from your skin exposing your chest. Every time felt like the first time. It didn't matter how many times you undressed yourself in front of him, he would still get excited and nervous all at the same time.
"I'll never get tired of this," he mumbled, eyes going straight to your chest.
"I hope you don't because I'll never get tired of you," you said softly. You lift Doyoung's shirt tugging it up. He lifts his arms helping you get the fabric off of him. You toss the shirt next to yours and shuffle off his lap to remove your pants. Doyoung started doing the same. His hands clumsily undid his belt, fingers unable to properly hold the leather because of how sweaty his fingertips were. You watched him, laughing softly as you moved his hands gently, undoing his belt for him.
"Why do you still get nervous every time," you laughed.
"Because it's you."
Your hands are on his zipper when you stop and look at him. You leaned in, kissing him quickly with a small smile on your face. "We might as well get married now since you wanna be all cute and romantic," you tease.
"But if we do that, you won't get your big princess wedding." The both of you laugh as you pull off his jeans and boxers. You run your hands down his chest, making his breath hitch in his throat slightly. The way your nails raked softly over his skin - he wanted to put a baby in you right at this moment.
You had almost completely forgotten about the storm at that point, just focusing on Doyoung in the candle light. But like always, your small fears had to betray you in some way. You glanced out the window, immediately becoming worried again seeing the trees sway in the wind and - wait, is it hailing now? The loud sound of the balls of nice hitting your window and car in the driveway confirmed your thoughts, making you knit your brows.
"I think it's hailing now, Do."
"I know, but don't worry about it, okay." Doyoung put his hand on your waist, pulling you closer to him. "Don't worry about anything. Just lay back and let me take care of you." Doyoung gently laid you on the couch, lifting your legs. You and him had discussed having children before, conversation always ending in "I don't know" or "maybe," but right now he was feeling like the answer should be "definitely."
You laid there watching him as he lined himself with your core, eyes lost in the wetness between your legs. Doyoung pushed himself into you, a sigh of relief and pleasure falling from both of your lips. Doyoung moved his hands from your thighs to your ankles, holding them tight in his hands. Your brows knit once he starts thrusting, moving in and out of you slowly.
"You remember that conversation we had about kids," he asked, breathing heavily because of the pleasure.
"Mhm," you nod, lip between your teeth.
"I..I changed my mind, I want one… now." Doyoung's other hand found its way to your core, fingers gently toying with your clit as he thrusted. He felt you shiver under his touch, soft moans filling the space of the quiet room. "Wanna put a baby in you so bad.."
You nodded, only half listening to what he was saying. And in all honesty, you wanted it too. You needed it. "Please Doyoung, put a baby in me," you moaned softly.
Doyoung kept thrusting in you slowly, breathy groans leaving his lips. His eyes followed your hands as you brought one to your chest, pinching your nipple, and the other to Doyoung's hand that was in your clit. You followed his movements, pressing his fingers on your clit harder. "Fuck," you whispered. "Faster baby."
Doyoung let go of your ankles, allowing you to readjust yourself on the couch. He leaned down, kissing you passionately as he thrusted. His movements were sharp and deep, the sound of skin slapping playing over your ears instead of the worsening storm outside. You cupped his face, moaning on his lips.
"Fuck..right there," you whined softly.
If he could, he would get your face at the very moment tattooed on his brain. You were so pretty, you were always pretty no matter what. But something about your face when you were under him, letting yourself be vulnerable despite your usual introverted nature was so fascinating to him. You always crumbled at every touch, every word, every sound. And to make matters better, you looked angelic in the candle light.
Your arms were now around his neck, forehead resting on his as the both of you moaned. Doyoung's arm snakes around your waist, pulling you closer to him. He needed to be chest to chest with you, feeling every breath you took. Doyoung slipped into the crook of your neck, planting messy kisses on your sweaty skin. You whimpered in his ears, hands in his hair.
"You sound so pretty baby," he mumbled on your skin. "I love it so much."
"D-Doyoung.." The way his name rolled off your tongue almost sent him to the moon. You clenched around him slightly, earning a small raspy whine from him. Doyoung took your left hand and pinned it on the arm of the couch above you. He clasped his hand with yours, squeezing it tightly as if he would lose you if he let it go.
He kissed you once again, tongue dancing with yours. He was so desperate for you and you could feel it. You always felt it, and it always turned you on even more. You never knew Doyoung to be a person who loved physical touch, but after you started dating him, he was like a completely different person, especially in bed. He borderline worshipped, and while it was overwhelming in the beginning, you grew to love and crave more of his attention.
Just as he pulled away, the sudden sound of thunder roared through the sky. The sound was so strong, you felt your house shake at the sound’s vibrations. The sudden noise made you jump, making Doyoung pause his movements for a moment. "You okay," he asked worriedly, scanning your face.
You nodded, giving him a small smile. "I'm okay, it just surprised me a little." You have him a quick kiss moving your arm from around his neck to cup his face. "Keep going."
Doyoung started thrusting again, a low grunt in his throat feeling you squeeze around him again. You were still cupping his face, finger tips lightly brushing his skin with every movement. Doyoung squeezed your hand again, wincing slightly at your nails digging into his skin. Doyoung started fucking into you harder, pulling louder sounds out of you.
"That..that feels good," you said between pants.
"How good baby? Tell me." Doyoung leaned into you neck, teeth nipping softly at your skin. His arm was still wrapped around your back, rubbing circles in your waist.
"Really good," you whimpered. "I'm so close Do."
His brows were knit when he lifted his head from your neck. Doyoung canned your face, a small smile tugging in his lips. He could always tell when you were close. You always tend to cling to his shoulder or grab whatever you were holding tighter, and this time it was both of those things. Your hands gripped his hand and shoulder hard, nails imprinting on his flesh. "Look at me when you cum."
You nodded, trying your best to listen and be good for him. You felt yourself become small under Doyoung's intense gaze, gulping when you felt your body begin to tense up. "Baby, I..I'm gonna.."
And just like that, you came hard squeezing around him hard. Your moans filled the room, body trembling under his when he pulled you closer.
"That's it Y/N. I know that felt good," he cooed. "Where do you want me to cum?"
"Inside me," you panted. "I wasn't kidding earlier."
"You sure? I don't mind doing it but-"
"I'm sure Doyoung." You kissed him, smiling against his lips when he kissed you back harder. Doyoung started thrusting into you again, a shudder falling last your lips. You were already sensitive from cumming first, every movement started feeling like an electrical current flowing throughout body.
"Fucking hell," you moaned loudly, throwing your head back at the feeling.
"Just a little more baby. Can you take it for me?"
"Anything for you." You were slightly slurring on your words, too overtaken with pleasure. Doyoung kept rocking his body at a steady pace, but his movements were getting rougher and rougher. He dropped his head in the crook of your neck, soft moans and whimpers leaving his lips closer and closer to his orgasm.
"Cum in me Doyoung. Make me yours."
That's all he needed. Doyoung came inside of you hard for the first time. The both of you moaned together, the warm liquid spreading inside you. Doyoung clung to your body, still holding your body close to his like you would run away from him. His breathing was heavy along with yours, breaths tickling your neck. Doyoung let go of your hand but stayed on your palm simply resting it.
"I can't believe we actually did that," he said giving you a soft tired chuckle.
"Well I can." You kissed the top of his head, nuzzling your nose in his hair.
"Are you..sure you're okay with me cumming inside you? That seemed like such a heat of the moment thing," he questioned.
"It was, but I don't regret it."
Doyoung lifted his body off of yours, staring down at your tired face. You had a happy, content look on your face, like you waited for this to happen. Just when he was about to say something thunder roared again. He looked over to the window, seeing that the hail stopped and all that was left was horrible rain. This time you didn't jump because you were so distracted by the mere thought of a mini Doyoung running around your house.
"The hail stopped.."
"I love you."
A soft laugh escapes your lips speaking at the same time as him. You licked your lips, smiling at his flustered expression. "Why are you getting embarrassed?"
"You said that out of nowhere," he said, blush spreading across his cheeks.
"Your naked and inside of me. And when you pull out, your-"
"Okay, okay. I get it. I shouldn't be embarrassed about it," he chuckled. Doyoung kissed you softly, smiling in your lips. "I love you too."
"Good. Now what are we naming our children?"
Doyoung gave you an amused look, trying to lift himself off your body only for you to pull him back down. "Y/N, we'll talk about that when I get off you."
"But I want you close," you pout.
"Okay, fine. If we have a girl, I like the name Sarah," he said, giving into your question.
"And a boy?"
"I just want girls."
"Do, that's not how it works-"
"I said what I said."
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metallicames · 4 months ago
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New fic inspired by the song Loverman because James with that voice makes me imagine certain things... 😈
@metalmaidenn Thank u for your precious help ❣️
Loverman
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Description: you broke up with James a year ago and while you are trying to get your life back together by dating a new guy you unexpectedly meet him outside your hotel.
Warning: dirty talking, sex, oral sex
⸻⭒⸱ 🖤 ⸱⭒⸻
Staring at the ceiling, heart beating wildly… you look at the clock on the bedside table: it's 3 in the morning, you already know that you won't sleep a wink after what happened today. You thought you had gotten over the breakup with James: a year has now passed and you felt quite calm, you seemed to have solved the situation by detaching yourself completely from him and his world, so as not to suffer and no longer feel dependence on him, on his company, from his body. After months of suffering you managed to tell him that it couldn't works anymore, that knowing that he was always on tour and often had sex with other women just to overcome abstinence and distance was wearing you down inside, you had the strength to do it and just with one look from him, the sound of his voice you screwed everything up.
“Y/N is that you?" he asked in a surprised tone, approaching after you got out of Theo’s car, the boy you've been dating for a month and who had kindly accompanied you to the hotel. From that moment your brain went into blackout, you probably looked at him with a shocked expression, he smiled at you, with that smile that made you fall in love and that bewitched you for two years. After a few moments of embarrassment you started talking as you used to, you had almost forgotten how magnetic his gaze was and his way of talking to you, of taking interest in you. You couldn't say no to him when he proposed to meet up the next day just to let you listen to some covers he was working on with the guys in the band, it's something you've always done since before you got together. The love for music was the thing that bonded you from the start so initially accepting it didn't seem strange to you but now thinking about it with a clear mind you already know that the inevitable could happen, that you won't be able to resist him if he ever takes the first step and this thing it agitates you it makes you come dizziness.
You spend a sleepless night, in the morning you go to a meeting with an agent who has to talk about a collaboration proposal for a job there in New York, for a few hours you manage to distract yourself and think about something else.
7pm arrives, you prepare to meet your friend Mel in the nearby bar, while you're leaving you see your reflection in a shop window and realise that you've dressed for James: black dress with flounced skirt, fishnet stockings and boots. You leave the hotel and meet Mel, you spend two hours catching up on the latest events but for the moment you avoid talking about James, you don't want to be influenced by his opinions even if you know they could bring you back to reality and make you more realistic, but at the same time you can think of something else and be less tense about the upcoming meeting.
Hours pass, Mel greets you and takes a taxi while you wait outside the bar. Shortly after James arrives on his Harley, just to complicate the situation even more, he greets you with a toothy smile, his eyes shine, his gaze is vibrant. He hands you the helmet and signals you to get on his motorcycle, you get on and you hold on tightly to his hips, leaning slightly on his back: just that first contact makes you jump, as if it were the first time you’ve touched him in your life.
James opens the attic door and beckons you to come in, closing the door behind you shortly after. It takes your eyes a few seconds to get used to the soft red lights which create a warm and sensual atmosphere. The room is big, with large windows that overlooks the illuminated city, dark but welcoming at the same time, the king-sized bed is covered in elegant black sheets.
You feel restless, your body tells you to follow your instinct, to let go, to get closer to him, kiss him, taste him, touch him… your head instead tries to proteste you, because rationally you know that you will get hurt again, that the relationship with James at the moment it's impossible and dangerously unhealthy.
James moves in the room with quietly and naturalness, he takes off his leather jacket, revealing his slender body, the black shirt slightly open on the chest reveals some blond hairs that peep out. Looking up slightly you see his iconic necklace with the silver pendant of a wolf head, twisted around his neck as if it was a choker accompanied by other necklaces, you swallow and look away. “Do you want something to drink? Make yourself comfortable” he asks you as he takes two glasses from the spirits cabinet. You nod while trying to calm down and start talking to him about this and that to create a relaxed and friendly situation, the topics range from the tour, to the guys in the band to your next project with a fashion house, everything seems to be back to how it was a few years ago, when you had met and always found something to talk about, anecdotes to share. Every now and then you notice that when you look away from him or take a sip of Jager, he fixes you with a look that makes you dizzy and make your toes twitch and often out of the corner of your eyes you notice that his gaze linger on your chest and then move up towards your face slowly.
While you are talking, he gets up and places a disc on the turntable… you had almost forgotten why you were there. He plays a track and tells you the story of the album project which will be a covers album and which will be released in the next few months . You relax on the armchair next to the window, sipping the Jager and letting yourself be carried away by the music: he lets you do it without distracting you, he sits on the bed with his forearms resting on his legs, playing with the ice in the glass, staring at the floor, then from time to time he raises his head and looks at you slightly smiling. The songs follow one another, James’ voice at some points gives you chills, it even seems better than all the previous records: more mature, powerful, vibrant… sexy. You start walking backwards and forwards in front of the window, James’ eyes are glued to you, you see that his gaze stops on your legs and goes up your entire body as if he were taking an x-ray and you feel yourself growing inside a powerful, unstoppable, uncontrolled feeling of pure desire.
Another track starts, the tone of his voice hits you immediately, it's penetrating, sensual in a way you've never heard him sing, for a moment you hold your breath looking away from the raindrops falling on the glass, you feel almost stunned by the words of the song and James' voice.
There's a devil waiting outside your door
(How much longer?)
And he's weak with evil and broken by the world
(How much longer?)
And he's shouting your name and asking for more
(How much longer?)
There's a devil waiting outside your door
(How much longer?)
”And… what is THAT?” you say looking at him, his gaze is dark, intense, penetrating he sips the Jager and then he places the glass slowly on the table... the tension in the air is palpable, the song in the background and the setting make you feel like in a movie, a surreal situation.
“Come here” he invites you, in a firm tone, your heartbeat increases, you knew this moment would come, you wanted it, you can't lie to yourself. You approach -almost scared-, your legs are shaking but inside you know what you want: you want him. He stands up, holding you by the hips, holding you close, then he kisses you softly almost as if he were waiting for your consent and then more and more intensely, passing his tongue between your lips meeting yours and you feel the butterflies in your stomach as if it were the first time. James increases the pace and intensity and with his hands he holds you even closer to his body, allowing you to feel his erection against your belly. You thread your fingers through his short hair at the nape of his neck and pull his head towards you, letting out a soft moan.
L is for love, baby
O is for only you that I do
V is for loving virtually everything that you are
E is for loving almost everything that you do
R is for rape me
M is for murder me
A is for answering all of my prayers
N is for knowing your loverman’s going to be the answer to all of yours
The song continues to echo in your ears making you feel even more excited, James stops kissing you for a moment, biting your lower lip first and keeping his forehead resting on yours. He moves his hands down from your hips towards your buttocks under the dress and starts to palpate them, pushing you even more against his erection, "turn around" he tells you in a low, almost whispered tone, staring into your eyes. You turn around and James slowly but firmly bends you forward towards the bed with his hands, pulling your dress up to your waist and letting out a low, guttural growl at the sight of your buttocks wrapped in fishnet stockings. You rest your knees on the bed and look at him over your shoulder giving him a wink, he returns with a devilish grin on his face. God, you know it's wrong, you know you're making everything more complicated but you can't stop, you can't resist him.
With a quick and unexpected movement, James tears your socks off with both hands, you gasp and as soon as you feel his hands moving your thong to the side, you lean forward deeply into the mattress with your face, stretching your arms forward, “God… what a sight" James pants behind you before giving you kisses followed by bites on your buttocks, your heartbeat speeds up and before you know it you feel his tongue sinking inside you, you hold your breath at the sensation and arch instinctively your back allowing him to have more access to your throbbing pussy.
“Mmmmh” James emits low and vibrant moans that send shocks throughout your body as he continues to eat you, squeezing your thigh with one hand and moving the other between your legs, pressing on your belly and then sliding on your clit swollen with desire, you narrow your eyes lost in the moment. You had almost forgotten how good he was and how much chemistry there was between you, almost because it is impossible to forget the intensity and dedication he puts into every movement, as if his only purpose in life was to give you pleasure and take you to the limit. As he pushes his face against you, divinely licking every spot, you can't hold back your moans and the thing that drives you even more crazy is seeing your reflection in the window overlooking the city.
Gimme more gimme more gimme more gimme more
While you are lost in ecstasy, James stops, slaps you on the buttock and undresses himself throwing his clothes everywhere and you take the opportunity to remove your dress and bra. James lowers himself towards you caressing your back using his nails but without hurting you and he moves closer to your face “did you miss me? Hmm?”
“Yes James… please” you tell him with a whisper, your sense of guilt is now only a faint memory, nothing exists but of you and James in this moment.
He caresses you with his fingers, passing them between your wet folds, while with the other hand he strokes his length before placing the tip against you and pushing in slowly. He lets out a long, low growl, going all the way in and your eyes roll back from the ecstatic sensation: you realise you haven't felt sensations this intense in a year, no matter how much you like it, Theo can't hold a candle to it.
His grip on your hips is firm and he begins to move slowly allowing you to adjust to his size and enjoy the moment.
Your moans are increasingly louder and synchronised with his thrusts, you grip the sheets with your fingers to avoid sliding forward and increasing the intensity of the penetration, "look at us, look at how beautiful we are, I missed you..." he tells you, lowering himself towards you and placing his hands on top of yours, squeezing them. You feel the warmth of his chest on your back and this makes you pant… then you open your eyes: you see your reflection once again but this time James is completely naked on top of you, while he gives you all of himself. His thrusts are slow but relentless, he's so deep inside you that you can't even think just moaning and panting.
“I love to fill you, I love to feel you only mine…”
While he talks to you and continues to push himself inside you without ever coming out, he puts one hand around your neck reaching up to your jaw and squeezes slightly panting in your ear.
“Fuck I love you James” automatically comes out of your mouth without even thinking about it, as if it were the most natural thing in the world to say.
James stops, comes out of you and slowly turns you onto your back and takes off your stockings and thong, literally penetrating you with his gaze, breathing heavily, "I've always loved you Y/N..." he tells you with a low voice, moving a lock of hair from your face. He repositions himself between your legs and pushes himself inside you again, resting his elbows next to your face, you wrap your legs around his hips and hold him to you, digging your nails into his hot and sweaty back.
From this moment you both lose control, he increases the pace, pushing himself into you with renewed power, you hold tightly to his back while you moan and whisper his name in his ear pressing your lips against it. “I'm so close James…so close…” - “mh… me too… come with me ok? Can you do it for me?” as he says this he increases the intensity of his thrusts, you nod and lift your head back moaning at the contact of his pubis against your clitoris.
“God… you're so wet” he murmurs breathlessly, chills pervade your body and you let yourself go into his arms under the weight of his body, squeezing his back and buttocks to you to feel him even closer.
“Oh my Godddd…” you can only exclaim this, you are in ecstasy your vision is blurred and your senses amplified, while your orgasm continues to make its way through your body in waves. James comes deep inside you emitting a low growl smothered by the mattress, you feel his hot cum dripping down your legs and his chest pressing against yours due to his altered breathing. You feel dizzy as if in a state of alteration but as soon as James turns towards you smiling, you come back to reality, he kisses you tenderly on the lips and coming out he rests his head on your breast, you automatically run a hand through his hair savouring the moment synchronising the breathing with his which from altered returns to being normal and relaxed.
As the feeling of ecstasy fades, a feeling of overwhelming anguish begins to creep inside you and the sense of guilt slowly resurfaces.
“What is it? Your heart is beating very fast” James asks you with a worried look, looking at you.
“James.. I.. I have to go”
“What? Now?”
“Yes we shouldn’t have…”
“Why? You just told me you love me!”
“I know but it’s not right, I don’t want to go back to being as bad as I was a year ago… it’s not healthy”
“But you can’t pretend that there’s nothing between us… You can’t lie to yourself… Am I a lover to you?”
You almost want to laugh, but it’s a nervous laugh of discouragement.
“James please… let me go” you quickly dress, wiping a tear that was starting to fall on your still red cheek.
James remains naked on the bed staring at you with a look of disbelief, if you could look inside him you would see his heart crumble with your every movement, but this is partly his fault, the fault of his water instincts inability to stay in a monogram relationship and commit.
You finish dressing quickly, you look at him one last time, with a defeated and suffering look.
“I really love you James, but I have to love myself first” you tell him with a trembling voice, you open the door and disappear into the corridor, you don’t know if you will ever see him again, you only know that you are destroyed, confused and madly in love.
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rvp32 · 2 years ago
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Enchanted Desires
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5K words, Commission, Threesome, DP. If you guys want a story written text me here.
The final exams were over, the weight of your last college test lifting from your shoulders. Exhausted from the all-nighter you had pulled to cram for it, you yearned for some well-deserved rest. Returning to your room, you collapsed onto the couch, instantly succumbing to sleep.
A thunderous commotion disrupted your slumber, and you awoke to the raucous clamor of your roommate Brian. He had the volume cranked up to eleven on his excitement meter.
"Y/n, let's hit the pubs today! We're finally free from this college grind, time to celebrate!" Brian's voice rang in your ears like a blaring alarm.
"Brian, for the love of peace and quiet, can you tone it down?" you grumbled in irritation, your eyes half-closed. You put your index finger to your lips, urging him to lower his voice. The silence was golden, but it was as fleeting as a summer breeze, for Brian ventured closer.
"Come on, man," he urged, his tone more subdued. "Let's go to the bars. This calls for a celebration, you know?"
Still reluctant to commit, you sought a way out, questioning, "So, who else is joining us at the pub today?"
Brian started listing off a few names of people who would be joining the celebration at the pub, but one name rang in your ears like a siren's song—Yooa. She was the girl you'd been with once, and saying she was adventurous was an understatement. Yooa had a taste for the unconventional and was remarkably open about it. Her company was known to be quite eclectic, and she enjoyed the company of many.
After a brief moment of contemplation, you agreed to join Brian for the pub outing. As you were about to make your exit, you issued a stern warning to your friend, your eyes locked onto his.
"Listen up, Brian," you said firmly. "You better not drink yourself into oblivion tonight. I swear to God, if you do, I won't hesitate to leave you on the side of the road."
Brian nodded in acknowledgment, his expression more serious now. "Hey, don't worry, bro. I'll make sure I stay on this side of blackout drunk tonight," he reassured you with a determined look in his eyes.
With your warning delivered and accepted, you and Brian set off for the pub. As you walked down the bustling streets, the excitement of being done with college and the prospect of meeting Yooa again began to take hold.
"So, Brian," you began, trying to lighten the mood, "you think this night's gonna be as wild as the last time we hung out with Yooa?"
Brian chuckled, recalling the memorable escapade from their previous encounter. "Oh, man, that girl knows how to keep things interesting, that's for sure. I wouldn't be surprised if things get a little crazy tonight."
As you turned the corner, the neon lights of the pub came into view, casting a vibrant glow on the sidewalk. The energy in the air was infectious, and the distant sound of laughter and music promised a lively evening.
You couldn't help but grin as you approached the entrance. "Well, whatever happens, let's make it a night to remember, Brian."
Brian clapped you on the back, his enthusiasm undiminished. "You got it, Y/n. Tonight, we'll raise the roof!"
With those words, you pushed open the door and stepped into the lively atmosphere of the pub, ready for a night of celebration, laughter, and whatever surprises Yooa had in store.
The pub was alive with energy, the dance floor pulsating with music that seemed to reverberate through your very core. The warm glow of the lights bathed the crowd in an inviting atmosphere. You decided to start the night with a few drinks, hitting the bar with Brian in tow.
As you downed your second drink, the music's rhythm seemed to seep into your veins, making it impossible to resist the magnetic pull of the dance floor. You couldn't help but move to the beat, swaying your hips in time with the music.
Brian watched with amusement as you grooved to the music. "Looks like you're getting into the spirit, Y/n," he shouted over the music.
You grinned and nodded, feeling the music coursing through you. "Can't help it, man! This music's too damn good!"
As you danced and lost yourself in the music, a familiar figure caught your eye. Yooa was on the dance floor, moving with fluidity and confidence, drawing you in like a moth to a flame. Her presence was magnetic, and you couldn't resist the urge to approach her.
You made your way through the dancing crowd, and as you got closer, Yooa turned to meet your gaze with a playful glint in her eyes. The music provided the perfect backdrop as you both moved in sync, your bodies communicating in a language of their own.
"You've got some moves, Y/n," Yooa said, her voice sultry, as she leaned in closer to speak in your ear.
You chuckled, the proximity sending shivers down your spine. "I've had some practice since the last time we hung out," you replied with a wink.
Yooa's laughter rang out, and she pulled you even closer, the connection between you growing stronger with each beat of the music. The night had just begun, and it was shaping up to be a memorable one, filled with dancing, laughter, and the promise of a connection that transcended the ordinary.
As the music throbbed through the air, you and Yooa moved together on the dance floor, lost in the rhythm of the night. The crowd seemed to fade away as your focus shifted entirely to the captivating woman in your arms.
Yooa's body pressed against yours, and the sensation was electric. She ran her fingers teasingly along your chest, her lips dangerously close to your ear. "You always know how to make an entrance, Y/n," she purred, her voice filled with playful seduction.
You couldn't help but smile at her words, feeling emboldened by the chemistry between you. "Well, Yooa, I had to make sure this night lived up to the last one."
Yooa's laughter was like a sweet melody, and she leaned in closer, her lips grazing your cheek as she whispered, "I have a feeling it's going to surpass it."
The dance floor became your playground, a space where words were unnecessary. Your bodies moved in perfect harmony, a dance of desire and anticipation. The flirtatious tension between you grew with every touch and every shared glance.
Yooa playfully brushed a lock of hair from your forehead, her eyes locked onto yours with an intensity that sent a rush of heat through you. "You've always been a tease, Y/n," she said, her voice husky with desire.
You couldn't resist the urge to tease back, trailing your fingers along the curve of her waist. "I learned from the best," you whispered, your lips brushing against her earlobe.
The connection between you two was undeniable, and as the night wore on, the flirtatious dance continued. The world around you faded into the background, leaving only the intoxicating sensation of Yooa's presence and the promise of a night filled with passion and adventure.
The seductive dance with Yooa was abruptly interrupted when a tall, well-dressed man approached her on the dance floor. He leaned in close, whispering something in her ear, causing Yooa to furrow her brow slightly. The sudden appearance of this man piqued your curiosity, and you couldn't help but ask, "Who's this, Yooa?"
Yooa turned to you, her eyes meeting yours as she spoke candidly, "This is my boyfriend, Jake." She paused for a moment as if assessing your reaction. "Actually, we have an open relationship," she continued her voice a mixture of honesty and vulnerability.
The revelation took you by surprise. You had heard of open relationships but had never been involved in one. The idea intrigued you, and you considered stepping away for a moment. However, something in Yooa's eyes, genuine warmth, and sincerity, made you pause.
She reached out to touch your arm, her voice was soft and reassuring. "Y/n, we're looking for someone to join us tonight. Would you be interested?"
The proposition hung in the air, and your mind raced with a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. The chemistry between you and Yooa was undeniable, and the idea of exploring something new and adventurous tugged at your curiosity.
You glanced over at Jake, who wore a knowing smile, and then back at Yooa. Taking a deep breath, you made your decision, a hint of excitement in your voice. "Alright, Yooa, let's see where this night takes us."
Yooa's eyes sparkled with excitement as she began to paint a vivid picture of what the night could hold. Her voice, a sultry melody, filled your ears as she whispered, "Y/n, just imagine the possibilities. With Jake and me, we can create an unforgettable experience. You'll get to explore desires you might have never even realized."
She leaned in closer, her lips tantalizingly close to your ear as she continued, "We're all about pleasure, and there are so many ways we can make this night incredible for you. You'll be at the center of our attention, and we'll ensure every moment is filled with ecstasy."
Yooa's words sent shivers down your spine, and you couldn't deny the allure of her proposition. Her confidence and sensuality were impossible to resist, and you found yourself captivated by the tantalizing possibilities.
She gently touched your cheek, her gaze locked onto yours with an intensity that made your heart race. "Think about the passion, Y/n. The pleasure. The adventure. It's a chance to explore your deepest desires and fantasies."
As you considered Yooa's words, you couldn't help but feel a surge of anticipation. The idea of a night filled with passion and exploration, guided by the experienced hands of Yooa and Jake, was undeniably enticing.
Finally, you met Yooa's gaze with a newfound determination. "Alright, Yooa. Let's make this a night to remember," you said, your voice filled with anticipation and excitement. With that, the three of you embarked on a journey of pleasure and adventure, ready to explore the uncharted territories of desire and passion that awaited.
The decision had been made, and as the music continued to pulse through the air, you leaned in and captured Yooa's lips in a passionate kiss. The spark of desire ignited, and the world around you seemed to fade away, leaving only the intoxicating taste of her lips.
Yooa responded eagerly, her arms wrapping around you as the kiss deepened. The chemistry between you two was undeniable, and the anticipation of the night ahead only fueled the intensity of the moment.
Breaking the kiss, you looked into Yooa's eyes, your hands tracing a path down her body, teasing and exploring. Her breath hitched, and a mischievous smile played on her lips as she whispered, "You're a quick learner, Y/n."
With a playful glint in your eye, you continued to dance with Yooa, your bodies pressed close as you reveled in the thrill of the moment. The pub seemed to disappear around you as you lost yourselves in the passionate connection you shared.
As the night wore on, and the desire between you intensified, you decided it was time to leave the pulsating atmosphere of the pub. You gently took Yooa's hand, your fingers entwined, and you led her toward the exit. The air outside was crisp, a welcome contrast to the heat of the dance floor.
Together, you walked towards Yooa's apartment, your hearts racing with anticipation of the adventures that awaited behind closed doors. The night was young, and the world was yours to explore, one desire-filled moment at a time.
*****
Upon arriving at Yooa's apartment, she left you on the couch and disappeared into her room. As you sat there, a mix of excitement and uncertainty filled your mind. You couldn't help but question the decision you had made earlier in the night. Was this really the right choice? Were you ready for what lay ahead?
But then, you thought about the undeniable chemistry between you and Yooa, the adventurous spirit of the night, and the thrill of exploring uncharted territory. You realized that even if it was a bad decision, it might also be the last opportunity you had to experience something like this with Yooa.
With newfound resolve, you got up from the couch and approached Yooa's bedroom door. You raised your hand to knock, but before you could, the door slowly creaked open, revealing a dimly lit room and Yooa standing there, wearing a black lace lingerie set that left very little to the imagination.
Your breath caught in your throat as you took in the sight before you. Yooa's confidence and sensuality were on full display, and the anticipation in the room was palpable. The air was thick with desire, and all doubts and hesitations melted away.
Without a word, Yooa extended her hand, her eyes locked onto yours with an intensity that sent a rush of heat through you. 
Before taking the next step, a hint of concern crept into your mind. You gazed into Yooa's eyes, seeking reassurance one last time. "Are you really okay with this, Yooa?" you asked, your voice tinged with genuine care.
Yooa met your gaze with a smoldering intensity, her fingers gently tracing a line along your jawline. "Y/n, this has been a dream of mine," she confessed, her voice filled with desire. "And Jake, my boyfriend, he's been eager for this too."
At the mention of Jake, curiosity got the better of you. "Where is he now?" you asked, a hint of interest in your voice.
Yooa's lips curled into a knowing smile as she leaned in closer, her breath warm against your ear. "He's taking care of something, but he'll be joining us soon," she whispered seductively.
With that, she closed the distance between you, capturing your lips in a kiss that was nothing short of passionate and lustful. The room seemed to spin as desire coursed through you, and any lingering doubts or questions faded away in the heat of the moment.
The passionate kiss between you and Yooa continued, intensifying with each passing moment, until suddenly, the apartment's front door swung open. Startled, you both broke apart, the intimate moment disrupted by the arrival of Jake.
Awkwardness settled in the room as Jake stepped inside, his presence a stark contrast to the heat that had filled the air just moments before. He looked between you and Yooa, his expression a mix of surprise and appreciation.
Breaking the silence, Jake offered a sincere smile. "Thank you, Y/n, for agreeing to be a part of this," he said, his voice filled with excitement. "I've been looking forward to tonight."
The tension in the room slowly began to ease as you realized that Jake's arrival had shifted the dynamic. It was clear that they had discussed and planned this moment together, and the three of you were embarking on a journey of desire and exploration.
All of a sudden Yooa says “Now that both of you are finally here get started because I can’t wait to get stretched and used to the point where I can’t remember my own name” 
Taking the invitation you walk to Yooa, grabbing her top and ripping it from her body leaving her completely naked. Yooa liked it rough and you knew very well how to give her what she wanted. 
You hug her from behind, one hand resting on her neck and the other hand squeezing her supple boobs, they were soft and the hard nipples were good to flick. Yooa had sensitive nipples so it didn’t take a long time before she turned into a moaning mess that was squirming in your grasp.
Your attention was peeled away from Yooa only to notice that her boyfriend was sitting down and pleasuring himself all while staring at Yooa’s sexy body crumbling in your hands, he seemed to be enjoying this from the looks of how fast he was pumping his cock. 
Seeing this as a good sign you slowly move your hand lower, exploring every inch of her upper boy, her supple tits that were red from all the harsh grabbing, her toned stomach that flexed whenever you bit her neck. Now reaching the most sensitive area of her body you decided to tease her, light feathery touched over her thighs slowly moving closer to her glistening pussy. 
“Please, touch my pussy,” Yooa begs, obliging with her request you touch her pussy, it was drenched, leaking from the anticipation. Playing with her swollen clit causes her eyes to roll back. Every touch causes her body to release more liquid, signaling that it is close to climax. 
“Are you gonna cum, Yooa?" You asked, your voice filled with a mixture of desire and anticipation. You already knew the answer, but you wanted to hear it from her lips.
Yooa nodded, her eyes locked onto yours, her breath hitching in her throat as she struggled to find her voice. "Yes," she finally managed to whisper, her voice trembling with anticipation.
With a knowing smile, you urged her on. "Then go ahead, Yooa. Show your boyfriend how big of a slut his girlfriend is," Increasing your pace, Yooa screams in pleasure before letting out a huge stream of squirt. 
Yooa's legs gave way, and she collapsed into your arms, her desire and need evident in her eyes. A simple command passed your lips, and she obediently opened her mouth, her anticipation palpable.
You held your wet fingers before her, your gaze locked onto hers. "Taste yourself," you whispered in a husky voice, Yooa Sucks on your fingers religiously, licking every nook and cranny of the 2 fingers that you placed in her mouth. 
“You like it?” You question Yooa, and she simply nods. “Maybe I should get a taste for myself straight from the source,” you carry Yooa to the bed and place her on the edge before kneeling. Spreading her legs apart you finally get a view of her pink pussy with a cute little bush and you take your time to admire it. 
“Don’t stare, please,” Yooa covers herself embarrassed because of how much you were looking. Diving into her pussy, you finally get the taste of the heavenly goodness. Her  pussy tasted sweet, making you want to eat her forever. 
“Fuck! That feels amazing, Keep going! Oh my God,” Yooa moaned as she griped onto your hair pushing you further into her. Continuing your feast on her wet and delicious pussy, using your free hand to occasionally flick her clit. 
“Oh yeah! Fuck!” Yooa said in between moans. Her back bends upward due to the immense pleasure that she is receiving. 
“I’m going to cu-” Before she could finish her sentence you feel another stream of squirt on your face. Trying your best not to let liquid gold go to waste you lick up everything you possibly can. Wanting to drink more of her amazing squirt you insert 2 fingers into her and pump while stimulating her clit with your free hand. 
“No, too sensitive, stop please Y/n!” Yooa screams, her body now bouncing on the bed trying to get away from your fingers but your legs managed to keep her in place as you overstimulated her cunt. 
The intensity of the moment had pushed Yooa to the brink of ecstasy, rendering her unable to form coherent words. Her hands flailed in a desperate attempt to communicate her overwhelming pleasure and the need for a moment's respite, yet her body betrayed her as it writhed with unrestrained passion on the bed.
The room echoed with her screams and pleas for mercy, a symphony of desire and surrender. The connection between you two was electric, and in the throes of passion, you continued to ravish Yooa, lost in the sensual dance. 
The crescendo of pleasure finally reached its peak, and Yooa came undone in a powerful release. A torrent of liquid accompanied her screams, her body trembling uncontrollably, tears of ecstasy streaming down her face. It was evident that this experience had pushed her to new heights of pleasure she had never reached before.
Her boyfriend, concerned by her screams and violent shaking, rushed to her side, his expression a mix of surprise and care. Jake gently pats Yooa’s hair as she slowly comes down from her mind-destroying orgasm. Once she manages to come down from her high and sit up, Jake hugs her and kisses her.
The room was thick with desire and the afterglow of intense pleasure as the three of you found yourselves entangled in the aftermath of a passionate encounter. Jake, his eyes filled with awe, turned to Yooa, his voice filled with admiration.
"Are you alright, babe?" he asked, his concern mixed with an undeniable excitement. "That was incredible. I've never seen you like this. It was so damn hot that I almost lost it myself."
Yooa, still catching her breath, nodded in agreement, her voice filled with a newfound desire. "Yeah, it was mind-blowing. I didn't know my body could handle something like this. Now that I've had a taste, I might just get addicted." She looked at both you and Jake with a sultry gaze. "I hope this is just the beginning of the night because I need you guys to use me."
Yooa's hands found their way to your thighs and Jake's, her touch sending a shiver of anticipation through both of you. A mischievous smirk played on your lips as you locked eyes with Yooa, knowing full well what was about to unfold next. 
To make it easier for her you stand up and take off your pants and underwear that were restricting your erect cock. While you were doing so, Yooa helped her boyfriend out of what little clothing he had left on himself. Once she turned to look at you in all your naked glory you could see the excitement in her eyes, “You don’t have to just stare, you can touch it.”
Your permission was all that she needed because her hand reached over to grab your cock and spit on it before she began stroking you. Completely immersed with the cock in her hands, her boyfriend was again left on the sidelines but he wasn’t having any of that as he took her free hand guiding to his hard cock.
Yooa enthusiastically stroked the two hard cocks in her hand for a minute before taking mine in her mouth. The warm feeling was amazing, Yooa was very good at sucking cock but she wasn’t able to take your cock to the hilt, she continued using her tongue to play with the head and then all of a sudden she started trying to deepthroat your cock, with great difficulty she managed to take almost everything, taking your hand you place it on the back of her head to push her till her nose was touching your pelvic bone. Your cock managed to reach parts of her throat that weren’t touched in a long time. 
After holding her in place for a few seconds you let go, Yooa immediately started coughing but it didn’t last long as she put your cock back in her mouth, seeing how well she was doing, you started to face fuck her. Losing all sense of your surroundings you were pumping into her face like there was no tomorrow.
The intense feeling of fucking her throat was driving you closer to your orgasm. “Fuck Yooa, I’m going to cum soon where do you want it?” You manage to say as you continue pounding her face. Yooa doesn’t reply but she grabs your ass with her free hand and pulls you closer to her which causes you to cum down her throat. 
“Fuck that felt amazing,” you say before falling onto the bed. Yooa then moves on to pleasuring her needy boyfriend. taking this time to recover some energy as you didn’t want the night to end this way. However, it doesn’t take long before Jake cums, “Don’t tell me you are done just from blowing one load,” Yooa says after swallowing Jake’s cum. 
“Not so fast, I still have a lot left in the tank and some more stress to relieve,” You say and wink at her. 
“Come here and prove it,” Yooa says as she spreads her legs and plays with her pussy. Her pussy was wet and inviting. Taking her up on the offer you crawl to Yooa and push her into a missionary position. “I’m going to put it in now,” You tell her as you slowly insert your penis inside her. The feeling was inexplicable, it was tight but not suffocating, almost like it was made as a hilt for your sword. 
Yooa’s nails dig into your back as the little space between Yooa and you decreases, her nails are going to leave a mark but you couldn’t care less. Once you bottom out Yooa wraps her hands around your neck and pulls you into a kiss. It was a kiss filled with lust, both your tongues battling for dominance. 
Not being able to withstand staying still, you pull out from the kiss, “ I am going to start moving,” With that warning, you begin moving slowly but your pace gradually increases.
“Fuck, Y/n feels so good. Don’t stop!” Yooa moans out, “You are stretching me out so good. God damn this is amazing!”
Jake was now sitting next to her, guiding her face to his erect cock, she sucks on it without any complaints. All of a sudden, Jake suggests something you weren’t expecting, “Let me get into her ass, and you can take her pussy.” 
You make eye contact with Yooa to make sure she is okay with this, and she nods. Not wanting to pull out from the warm pussy, you lifted Yooa, holding her close to your body as Jake got into place. 
Once Jake was lying down on the bed, you slowly put Yooa down on his erect cock, the sensation was too much for Yooa as she let out a loud scream as the foreign object entered her asshole. Her pussy tightened around your cock squeezing it hard as tried to cope with the pain.
“Oh my fucking God!” Yooa screamed and bit down on your neck to stop herself from screaming because of the initial pain. Once she adjusted to the feeling, “My holes are being stretched beyond my wildest dream. Now fuck me, do it like your life depends on it” 
Both of you start moving, Jake speeding up a lot faster than you. Her vagina still gripping onto your cock like there is no tomorrow, your initial movement is slow but that immediately changes when Yooa says “Is this the best you can do? If it is then you are fucking useless,” 
This sets off a switch in your brain and you see red, not caring about how tight her pussy is your movements get hard and fast. You were reaching deep inside of her as you could see your dick poking at her toned stomach every time you thrust into her. 
“Yes, this is what I wanted! Fuck me like I am a useless bitch who is nothing but a sex toy for you both to dump your cum in” Yooa screams as she is being pounded in both her holes, her mind overtaken by pleasure. 
Using your free hand to slap her tits hard as you continued to pound her pussy, Yooa’s supple tits turn red with the impact and her moans only got louder with every slap. The three of you were completely lost in the realm of sex, all chasing for their own pleasure not caring about how the other feels but coincidentally pleasuring the other without knowing. 
The room was filled with nothing but the sound of skin slapping against skin, moans, and grunts. Noticing that you were getting closer to your climax you paused. Due to the sudden lack of pain and pleasure, Yooa looks at you in surprise, Jake also stops. 
“Let’s switch positions, I wanna fuck that tight ass and fill it up with cum,” Yooa agrees with your proposition. Once your cock was out of Yooa’s pussy and Jake’s cock was out of her ass, you flip Yooa over, she was now in doggy style but she lowered herself until Jake’s cock was inside her pussy. 
As you push your cock into her puckered hole, “Oh wow! This is crazy, I am going to cum!” Yooa convulses on Jake’s body. “S-Slow down, it feels like you are going to rip my ass apart.”  Obliging with her request you slow down your entrance into her ass, finally managing to bottom out, you give Yooa some time to adjust. 
“Move,” Yooa gives you the green signal, You begin your assault on her ass, it was different from her pussy, it was much tighter and you didn’t know how much longer you would last. Jake was pounding into her pussy like there was no tomorrow and you were positioning hard into her ass. 
You grab Yooa’s hair with one hand and pull it using the other to spank her ass, causing her to yelp with the sudden infliction of pain. You could feel how close Yooa was to her orgasm and both Jake and you weren’t much better as well, thrusts no longer had a rhythm. 
“Fuck babe, I am going to cum,” Jake said, “Hold it, babe, I am so close to cumming as well. Let’s cum together, be a good boy for me,” Yooa said. 
It only took you a few more thrusts before you announced, “Fuck, I am going to fill your ass Yooa,” your pounding getting faster as you were in the final stretch for the best orgasm of your night. 
“Let’s cum together,” Yooa announced and that led to all three of you cumming together, Yooa’s pussy and ass gripping harder, Your dick pumping cum into her ass, and Jake filling up Yooa’s pussy. 
You were the first one to pull out, watching your cum drip down from Yooa’s pussy. You fall onto the bed tired from the strenuous activity. The lack of sleep was catching up to you. The last thing that you remembered was Yooa saying, “Babe, check the cameras. Once we post this online it’s going to make us a lot of money” 
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causenessus · 8 months ago
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try again
part 0.3. FEELING A LITTLE DAPPER
“she still has his contact in her phone. some days she still looks through their old texts; at the last conversation they had, without even knowing it’d be their last. other days, she hovers over the delete button, but she’s never hit it. she could never sever her last tie to him. she wants to believe that maybe their lives are intertwined, sewn together in some way. she looks at the prunus mume tree right outside her office window as she cleans up the place a bit. it had to mean something, right? to her, it didn’t signify a lot, just forever. it was a heart-twisting reminder of him every time she saw it, and she wonders, did he recognize the tree? when he walked into her office and stared out her window, did he recognize it as the one that bears his favorite food? her head instinctively turns to look at it every time she passes it by, much like she used to do when she’d walk by his house when they still lived close to each other, even after they stopped talking. it’s not like there’d be anything new about the tree she hadn’t already seen; the flowers were blooming from the branches dancing in the wind, and its roots were peeking out from underneath the ground, but she still can’t help turning her head every time she walks by it. she can’t ever stop herself from looking at anything that reminds her of him. which is funny, because she sees him in everything; every song is about him, every story is about him–he was everything to her, and he still is everything. he’ll always be in her life. not a lot, just forever.”
content warning: lighthearted joke about being an alcoholic
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.
.
.
"when you walked in, i just stood still. i said, 'i'm sorry, love, i have no will. if i try to move, i'll break and spill. tired is the burning sea that calls me to the bottom like a stone. and i'm sinking alone.'"
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prev. | m.list | next
extras <3
today has been a day...so if this is a crusty boring chapter i am SO sorry
i tried i promise
when the tea gossipers gc moved in they all ended up writing like a document with multiple agreements
some of which being a cycle in which they will all cook for everyone, or if they're feeling lazy, they have to treat everyone out (but there's a $40 limit on how much they have to pay, anything more than that is either split between the rest of the three roomies or they'll each pay for their own drinks. tldr; there's lots of holes and amendments to this rule)
iwaizumi (although this applies to everyone, it's mainly for him since this is required in the rest of their jobs) is sworn to secrecy because he lives with three people who all specialize in dealing with serious cases and personal lives
omi is very admant about recycling. and he makes sure to wash out everything before it's recycled so that it's done properly (i'm projecting)
the tea gossipers went out to a sushi restaurant first before akaashi and y/n agreed it was too peaceful there and they wanted to go to a bar to drink (they're both only slightly tipsy atp, y/n doesn't feel like getting blackout drunk today and akaashi debating it rn)
the peas in a pod gc went to onigiri miya once omi got home when osamu stood there listening to atsumu explain the situation and try and convince omi to text y/n while omi ignored him the entire time
and then texted y/n five minutes later bc he couldn't hold himself back anymore
and as mentioned in the beginning :) y/n has kept his contact and a pfp of him from when he played volleyball when he was younger
taglist: @eggyrocks @wyrcan @guitarstringed-scars @strawberryuri @violetesensou @kakeru-eem @glmge @heytheredemonsss @mollyrolls @bemebiu @daszy @snail-squasher @0moonii @thiisisntlovely @todorokiskitten @rory-cakes @iiwaijime @iatethemochi @yuminako @savemebrazilhinata @kismyscars @bokutoko @nobodybutnnoorr @wolffmaiden @daisy-room @softpia @lees-chaotic-brain @v3nusplanetofluv @crispchocolates @phoenix-eclipses @hhoneyhan @encrypta @rockleeisbaeeee @cr4yolaas @zombriesworld @localgaytrainwreck @moucheslove @hibernatinghamster @notverymarley @certaindreampost @akaakeis @ciderscape @lucien-luna @strawbrinkofdeath @wave2mia @samuel1004 @01trickster10 @dazqa @cosmiicdust @chemiru
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yoongis-property · 2 years ago
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CURRENTLY READING (what i wanna read in august)
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MASTERLIST
(last update: 07.31.2023)
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PARK SEONGHWA
richboy!seonghwa by @ateezmakemeweep 
War of Hearts by @mingigoo 
happy new year by @mingigoo ✓
Rotten by @mingigoo ✓
just about perfect by @yoongiseesawmp3 
guardian angel by @mazeinthemiroh 
you’re the one that i want by @ateezmakemeweep 
the duke and his general by @baekhvuns ✓
his to protect by @cqndiedcherries ✓
M-mommy by @wooyoungmybelovedhusband ✓
Kishi Kaisei by @flurrys-creativity ✓
unexpected company by @mia-tiny 
i remember by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
it`s terribly hot today by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
kiss of chaos by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
the town at the edge of the world by @tenelkadjowrites​ 
Nuclear Baby by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
a little less lonely by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
arrow in the dark by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
off limits by @tenelkadjowrites​ 
no secrets at christmas by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
lonely in gorgeous by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
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KIM HONGJOONG
bla bla bla by @yoongiseesawmp3 
you need a holiday. by @mazeinthemiroh ✓
pirate king by @cybersan ✓
Spending Time Together by @songmingisthighs ✓
dont stop by @im-657-mv ✓
saved by @sansblkgirlfriend 
Crushcrushcrush by @im-whatchamccallit ✓
A little something more by @flurrys-creativity 
tell me to stop by @tenelkadjowrites ✓
what happens in a blackout by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
Halloween by @mingigoo​ ✓
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JEONG YUNHO
killing me by @yoongiseesawmp3 
two is better than one by @songmingisthighs​ ✓
sharing is caring by @kitten4sannie ✓
watch me by @songmingisthighs ✓
frontier psychiatrist by @riboism 
Tutor Boy by @cas-skz ✓
Won't You Be My Friend by @anyamaris 
Acquainted by @mingigoo​ ✓
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KANG YEOSANG
we are tragic. by @mazeinthemiroh 
lights out by @bobateastay 
i`m in love by @anyamaris 
you`re my paradise by @anyamaris 
Obsessive by @mingigoo​ ✓
Freaks by @mingigoo​ (feat. woo) ✓
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CHOI SAN
oh he’s good by @yoongiseesawmp3 ✓
pop quiz by @yoongiseesawmp3 ✓
Party of Three by @cybersan ✓
kill them with kindness by @mazeinthemiroh ✓
in the quite spaces by @honeyhotteoks ✓
Darling, His Darling by @sansblkgirlfriend 
Drinking Games by @shyxcherry 
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SONG MINGI
two is better than one by @songmingisthighs ✓
sharing is caring by @kitten4sannie​ ✓
Precious by @lovesanmotion 
My Unlikely Protector by @anyamaris ✓
teacher`s pet by @anyamaris ✓
all in by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
once by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
Dreamers by @mingigoo​ ✓
We fell in love in August by @mingigoo​ ✓
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JUNG WOOYOUNG
smile for the camera by @yoongiseesawmp3 ✓
Party of Three by @cybersan​ ✓
sunday baking by @cas-skz 
Try Me by @tenelkadjowrites​ ✓
Freaks by @mingigoo​ (feat. yeosang) ✓
Midnight Kisses by @mingigoo​ ✓
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CHOI JONGHO
get close to me by @honeyhotteoks 
knock it off by @teezertales 
Cute as a Button by @anyamaris 
...ramen before you go? by @mingigoo​ ✓
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OT8
MATE by @jwying ✓
in love and lore by @shadowynn ✓
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please reblog and like, it helps a lot :)
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tttt06 · 23 days ago
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Show Show Show
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IdolNi-ki x BlackIdol
(I like this duo and might write more about them)
Synopsis~ You were a newly debuted group. You were a team of all-black members. You had a comeback and needed to do recordings for promotions. That involved doing promotions with Enhypen Ni-ki and Jake.
Warnings~ No condom, size kink, size training, I'm talking multiple rounds ya'll. She's not thin, she's SLIM THICK! Again, she has a tattoo (It's only mentioned once). Short reader. Problems with eating.
Word Count~ 12.5K
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It took years of hard work. I started as a trainee at 17 and trained hard daily to get where I am today. 
We were under HYBE entertainment.
I was the lead dancer of my group, Blackout. When we first debuted, there were some controversies about it. They didn't like how we were all black and called us Blackout.
My team consisted of Angie, Leena, Gypsy, and me. I was the youngest, and Angie was the oldest. Gypsy was the leader, while Angie was the wild card.
Angie practically raised me, so we're pretty close. Leena is more of the quiet type, but we love her the same.
Leena was actually the lead vocalist in the group. 
It came with hardships. Some things were just unspeakable.
Since I was the dancer, I was used to being the most sexualized out of the members. Sure, I'm 18, but the members are protective of me. They still see me as a kid.
We debuted with a song called 'Plot Lines.' The song was intense for our debut. The concept was nothing like anyone else's.
It was like the mafia. Our manager explained, 'each comeback, a member is assigned to be the mafia. The fans have to figure out who it is.'
It was a fun concept. 
The fans got to interact with us, and it made livestreams fun. 
Fans would ask crazy questions to figure out who is the mafia. 
I was scrolling through Twitter as I spoke to Leena. "Unnie, do you know where my edge control brush went? I gave it to you to borrow." 
Leena pointed at the lunch table, "Check there." I got up from the couch and moved the packs of ramen out of the way. 
It's not like we could eat it anyway. The company put us on diets. When we were in HYBE dorms with the others, Woonhak from BND would stop by with chicken.
It was really sweet, and we naturally grew close. I thought we'd keep it a secret until Woonhak excitedly ran up to hug me at a music show. 
We're probably more shipped than Jennie and Taehyung. 
Our fans, twinkles, knew we were honest friends.
I grabbed my edge brush and smeared edge control over my edges. I looked in the mirror and brushed them into swirls. My makeup artist stared with worry.
I said in Korean, "I got it!" She let out a deep breath and walked to Gypsy. She was reading over the lines for the music core. 
We had to follow a script. I have a great memory, so I already remembered. 
I finished my edges, and Gypsy shouted, "Don't forget we have to do our dance challenge with Enhypen."
I've met Jake, Jay, and Heesung. The other members were foreign to me.
Granted, at the time, I barely spoke Korean.
Gypsy and Angie are Korean-American. Leena and I were only black. Leena was obsessed with learning languages. She took Korean classes before she became a trainee.
I was the only one going in dry. But now, I'm comfortable speaking Korean.
Angie asked, "With all of them?" Leena rolled her eyes, "Yeah, the entire group is doing it together." Angie raised her hands because she was ready to fight.
I laughed, "No fighting, Unnies!" I looked over at Gypsy and asked, "Gyp? Who specifically are we doing it with?" 
She thought, "I remember Jake... I think Ni-ki."
I nodded while looking back at my phone. Our manager walked in. He was such a girl dad. Mr. Lee was my favorite person in the whole world. 
As he opened the door, he had his hand over his eyes and asked, "Do we have clothes on?" Leena laughed, "We're fine, Mr. Lee."
He opened his eyes and looked at us. "Aw! You girls look so pretty!" I smiled sweetly. Mr. Lee pulled my cheek. "Mmkay. Let me give you a rundown. This is your first time being here. You're going to do great! Remember the lines... Angie," He looked at Angie because she always forgets the lyrics, "And don't get nervous. Make memes, not mistakes." 
He patted Gypsy's head, "Don't stress, okay? I know you're the leader, but you can relax, too."
Gypsy closed her eyes and let out a deep breath. "Okay, oppa."
He looked at his watch, "Okay, you're on in three. Let's get moving."
We filed out in a line. I nervously held onto Leena's hand. She swung our hands between us. The three hosts stood tall as they reviewed their cards. Dohoon excitedly waved, and I waved back.
I looked at the crowd to see our black light sticks waving midair. My smile spread as I waved at the couple of fans in the crowd. 
Our light was different because the light only turned purple. It was a black light. 
Purple and Black were the group colors. 
Again, we got into another controversy when I used a purple heart. Fans thought I was copying BTS, so we had to use the black hearts.
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"Show, Show, Show! Today, we're visited by a popular girl group, Blackout," An-a said. Gyuvin asked, "Is it because they make you black out when you hear their amazing songs?" Dohoon laughed, "That's crazy."
I smiled at Dohoon and quickly stopped myself. I don't want any dating rumors on my hands.
I swayed myself for comfort as I waited for our lines. The interview was a blur. All I remember was Gyuvin almost busting his ass to do a cartwheel and Leena falling over laughing.
It was time for the performance, though. I was always scared before every show, and Leena ritually held my hand tightly before going on stage. We did our team cheer and filed onto the stage.
The music started, and muscle memory locked in.
The facial expressions were on as the mysterious bass played to our dance number.
The song was sexier than usual, and as I danced sensually with my girls, the kick came in.
My body popped to the rhythm. Energy coursed through me as the crowd cheered. My verse came up, and I recited the quicker lyrics. 
The crowd was quiet, but that was normal in Korea. Twinkles waved their lightsticks aggressively. 
I smiled, "In a minute, we ain't have a good time in a minute." I danced to the guitar strum, and the ending fairy pointed towards me. The song is short, so I wasn't out of breath.
I waved to the camera and stuck up a thumb.
I was the maknae that never acted cute. Sure, I had an adorable side, like my dimples and height. Everyone thought I was charming when I rocked my afro in the MV, but for the most part, I was more on the sexier side.
We made our way off stage and ran for our rooms. Angie cheered, "We ripped the stage!" I laughed and touched up my makeup. 
Gypsy came in from the bathroom. She had her iPad as she looked through Mr. Lee's calendar. "We gotta go now. The guys are waiting."
I looked at everyone, "Who wants to go?" Gypsy said, "You and me? You're the main dancer. You have to come." Angie offered, "I could go." Gypsy nodded, "Good, I'll watch from the sidelines and make sure you're all good."
Angie followed the two of us to the boys. 
I stood next to Jake, and he was taller than me.
When I looked at Ni-ki, My eyes widened. He was a mountain of a man.
He was only a year older, and he's tall as fuck.
I bowed frantically, "Hello!" Ni-ki bowed respectfully. 
Our outfits from the stage were still on. We wore short skirts, fish nets, a crop top, thigh straps, and tall boots. The nine yards.
Gypsy was quick to run over and pulled my skirt down.
I pulled my skirt as I felt suddenly uncomfortable. Jake calmly stated, "We can do as many recordings as you want. I tried to learn the dance, but it looked a little complicated. Could you teach us?"
I looked at Gypsy as she adjusted my hair and skirt. She was my protector. 
Jake smiled while looking at Gypsy. I could tell he found an interest in her intensity. 
Gypsy could be intense and scary, but she was actually the softest person I knew. She cares about people hard. 
I've heard things about Jake, and don't get me wrong. I love Jake as a friend but as a lover...
He'd need to stay far away from Gypsy. He'd end up with a keyed car, and I wouldn't be the one keying it.
I stood in front of Jake and Ni-ki and danced. "You're gonna start going over, under. Then, ta-ta-ta... make sure your feet are far apart when you go here..." I explained. 
Ni-ki picked up on it quickly. 
I smiled as he danced in his own world. Jake was stumbling over a specific part. On instinct, I grabbed his arm and moved it to the right place. I kicked his legs apart and said, "Do it again." 
Angie laughed, "Uh oh. Dance leader Y/N is coming out."
I smiled sheepishly, "Sorry." Jake laughed, "Don't be. It's cute." He patted my head like he was my older brother. Ni-ki's eyes looked between us, and a gleam of judgment flashed in his eyes.
I pulled his hand off me playfully.
Angie stood in position, and Gypsy pulled out her phone. She played the song for us to practice one more time.
When she finally started recording, I danced to the song. Muscle memory was ingrained in my body.
My body took over as I smoothly took the rhythm. The song ended, and I watched the recording. 
I sighed, "Jake-uh. You need to put more energy into the song." He smiled at my nagging, and then I turned to Ni-ki. "You were perfect."
I gave him a thumbs up. At the start of the video, Ni-ki did something wrong, but I didn't know him like I knew Jake. I didn't want to hurt Ni-ki's feelings.
Jake groaned as we recorded five times. Each time, I found something wrong with the dance.
I huffed, "Jake, Bend your knees lower."
Angie was panting, "Jake, please! I'm exhausted." Ni-ki laughed, not even phased. 
We recorded one last time, and he finally got it right. 
I smiled as Gypsy stared down Jake. She was analyzing him before going back to the table. I took notice of the small peek he did back.
Jake has a crush on Gyp, but Gypsy probably doesn't like him.
I smiled, "That's fine. We'll give it to oppa."
Gypsy moved her curly bangs out her face and nodded, "Yeah." I looked at Angie to see someone was across the room looking.
I squinted my eyes. Hoshi from SEVENTEEN walked over. His smile was full of fondness. He must've been here for a BSS comeback. "Hi!" I bowed. Instead, Hoshi brought me in for a hug.
I hugged him back excitedly, "Y/N! How nice to see you! And, Ni-ki!" He pulled him in for a hug. He hugged Jake as well.
Hoshi pulled away, and that hamster smile spread. He shook his head before hugging me again. "How's everything?" I nodded, "Well, we're gonna see tonight." I was eluding toward the competition. 
Hoshi quirked his eyebrow, "You're still a competitive little fart." I laughed, "How else could I have debuted."
Hoshi looked behind me to see Angie. He hugged her and confessed, "I didn't see you because you're so tiny."
Angie slapped his back harshly, and he let out a cough. "I'm here for my soda." He walked to the vending machine and asked, "You guys want something? On me." 
I shook my head, "Diet." Hoshi's breath hitched. "I don't like that dieting stuff. Remember when I found you passed out in the HYBE elevator?" 
I shrunk from embarrassment, "That was..." Hoshi waited for a response, but when I didn't give him one, he paid for the small sandwich and passed it to me. 
The turkey looked so delicious. My mouth began to water. 
Angie and Gypsy were talking in the corner, and Jake had left. Right now, it was only Ni-ki, me, and Hoshi. 
"You two need to take care of yourselves." He patted our heads, "Call me if you need me."
He walked away, and I turned to Ni-ki. "When did you meet Hyung?" I said, "He found me in the elevator." 
Ni-ki had this unreadable expression. He bluntly asked, "You gotta crush on Jake or something?" I let out a laugh of disbelief. 
"Yeah, over my dead body. Jake is too old for me." Ni-ki quirked an eyebrow, "How old are you? 15?" I rolled my eyes, "I'm 18!" 
Ni-ki laughed, "Couldn't tell because you're so short."
My eye twitched. "I don't like you." Ni-ki smiled, "Okay? And? Anyways, you're a great dancer. I'd love to dance with you for a show someday." 
I tilted my head, "Want my number?" 
His eyes looked over my cute face. The makeup was doing wonders for me. 
"Yeah. Let me know."
I recited my number. Ni-ki clicked my number and texted me. My phone dinged, and I smiled. "Okay, Bye. I have an award to win."
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The idols of that day all stood in the lobby. The two songs combating each other were our song, 'Plot Lines' and BSS's newest song, '청바지.' I waited patiently. I was expecting BSS to win. Their song is so cunty.
But, to our surprise, the confetti popped, and our song won. Angie screamed and jumped on Gypsy. Leena held my hand tightly and bowed to BSS.
Hoshi walked over and patted my head. "You suck!" I teased, and Hoshi laughed. "You little shit." I giggled as I bowed to our fans.
Leena sang in the mic. I playfully danced, and to my surprise, Hoshi joined. He started dancing to the sexy parts, and I started laughing harshly.
We finally walked off stage, and I ran to the crowd. I waved at the small amount of twinkles there. "Thank you for coming!" I excitedly jumped and waved at them.
Gypsy grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and pulled me away. I smiled sheepishly. 
We made our way back to the changing room. Someone knocked on the door. Eunchae from Lessarfim walked in.
She needed to talk to Gypsy about going on her talk show.
When we did promotions, it was usually Angie and I. Leena would get shy, and Gypsy was the leader and wanted to give us more camera time.
Usually, if Leena goes, we all go with her to support her.
Gypsy started the conversation with Eunchae, and I walked out to mingle.
I have a lot of confidence. Twinkles find me adorable. I know I'm pretty and sexy. I dance well, and I have a good personality.
I'm not full of myself. I worked hard, and I know what I'm capable of.
I breezed past the staff and pulled my phone from my pocket. 
.
.
.
Hyung
We're gonna post the dance tomorrow
Hyung
Won't lie, the way Ni-ki looks at you when your dancing might start a dating rumor
Hyung
I wouldn't reccomend making it known you talk to Enhypen in general.
You
Ah, he was making sure I was dancing right...
You
He PMO more than anything🙄
Hyung
Okay, as big bro... I hate him back, as your manager I want you to be careful so you don't get shipped and more sexualized
Hyung
After the deepfake incident it's hard to bring image back to the innocent maknae we were shooting for
You
I know oppa. I've been trying to be like that on camera... I'm tired of it too.
Hyung
Don't worry. I'm not scolding you. Just be careful. Be back at the cars by 4:30 pm we have a schedule.
You
kk!
.
.
.
I started walking and bumped into someone. "Oof!" I looked up, and it was Woonhak. "Oh! Y/N!" I hugged him tightly, and he said, "Your performance was amazing!" 
I cheered, "So was yours! The only reason you didn't win this time was because you won last time."
We started walking off. "You ate anything?" I rolled my eyes, "You gotta stop trying to take care of me." Woonhak smiled, "I'm like your older brother." I huffed, "We're both 06 liners, and I'm older by two months."
Woonhak opened the door for me as we walked into the snack area. I walked in, and Woonhak said, "Ou! There's ramen." I murmured, "All you eat is ramen." He ran to pay for some.
Woonhak grabbed three. "Jesus." Woonhak squinted at me. I found a seat and waited for him to cook all three packs of ramen. 
When he came back, he slid me a bowl. I looked down, "All three weren't for me," Woonhak commented.
I smiled, "I'll pay you back." "Y/N... it was 50 won." I laughed lightly and slurped.
It felt good to eat. I felt like I was starting to lose my curves. Everyone loved them. I had a big ass, boobs, and nice curvature... but I was losing fat rapidly when I debuted.
Fans were noticing. Mr. Lee was trying to sneak us food without getting fired by the company.
He is a good manager.
Once, he was made to go through our phones to check we weren't dating, but instead, he just changed his contact name on all our phones.
That's why his name is Hyung instead of Oppa. 
Woonhak scrolled through his phone before looking at me. He said sternly, "Eat. Your food is gonna get cold."
I sighed and ate the rest of my ramen. Someone loud came in, and I turned to see Jaehyun and Sungho coming in. "I finished. Your members are here, and I gotta go by 4:30. It's 4:00." 
Woonhak smiled, "Okay. When are we gonna do our dance together?" I thought, "I have practice tomorrow night. Just come after."
Woonhak smiled, "Okay."
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I was in the practice room. The girls left to get some snacks, but as the lead dancer, I had to ensure I was doing it right.
An hour passed of me going over the same thing until a knock echoed through the room.
I paused the music and walked to the door. I peeked it open, expecting Woonhak, but instead, it was Ni-ki.
"What are you doing here?" 
Ni-ki had a cunning smile spreading across his face. I quirked an eyebrow as he pushed through, "Is this the next debut you're preparing for?" 
I sighed, "Yeah, it's called Light's Out." Ni-ki turned to me, "Do you rap or sing in the group?" 
I didn't answer. I walked over to my phone, ignoring Ni-ki.
Ni-ki walked closely behind me, "Let me see what you got at the least?"
I rolled my eyes and started playing the song. 
I danced like I was before. Ni-ki just stared with this look of satisfaction. His eyebrows furrowed, his nose scrunched, and his mouth was open.
When the song ended, I let out a sigh. "Judging by the song, you sing and rap?" 
I shook my head and sat next to him. "It's embarrassing... I'm the ace."
Ni-ki folded his arms. "Really? Rap, sing, dance." I added, "I write the lyrics, choreograph, and sometimes produce."
He laughed, "You serious?" I nodded, "They call me the female Han Jisung."
Ni-ki went silent. He stared at me, "You're pretty talented." I smiled, "Now you know why I'm so full of myself."
Ni-ki laughed, "I wouldn't say that. More of the confident type. I want to see what you're not satisfied with. I think the high self-esteem is your charm."
I nodded, "I'm just sure in what I do." Ni-ki laughed, "Why aren't you the leader?"
I rolled my eyes, "I can be wrong sometimes."
Ni-ki scooted a little closer, "Really?" His voice went down to a whisper, "I want to see that." 
I pushed him away, "You're weird."
He stared at me intensely for a moment. I heard someone scream my name, "Y/N-ah!"
Woonhak busted through the door and froze. "What the hell..." I looked at Ni-ki, then our proximity, then at Woonhak.
I pouted, "He's a weirdo!" Woonhak leaped over to fight Ni-ki. "Hey! I'm just a guy!" Woonhak pointed at him in anger. "You stay away from my best friend."
I laughed, "Hey. What if we all do each other dance challenges together?" 
Woonhak and Ni-ki turned to me. "I like that idea."
It wasn't long before we were recording silly videos for our TikTok pages. "How are we gonna get our manager to post this?" Woonhak's eyes widened, "I'll ask mine!" Ni-ki carefully watched Woonhak and turned to me, "Anyways, I have to record. I'll text you later, Y/N."
He waved, and Woonhak looked at me with that puppy smile, "He's really strange."
I laughed, "He is. Hey, I need your help with something."
He raised an eyebrow and started to stand up with me, "Yeah? What's up?" I held his hands, and we began to spin, "I need you to help me get this move down. I'm doing something wrong. I want to be sure I'm doing it perfectly for my twinkles."
Woonhak stopped and pulled me in for a hug, "I will."
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After a long day of practice, I sat in my dorm room. The girls were singing their hearts out to karaoke while I lay in bed.
A part of me was waiting for Ni-ki to text me. I was curious about him. 
Angie stormed into my room, "Aye! Come out of your room! We're partying!"
I smiled, "I'm tired. I'll come out next time." Angie sat on the bed, "Hey? You feeling okay?" I furrowed my eyebrows, "Yeah."
I wasn't feeling well. I had these cold shivers, and my head was hurting. I was used to this feeling, though. It's what happens when you don't eat.
Angie's hand settled on my forehead, "You feel sick." I shook my head, "We have a show tomorrow. I don't have time to be sick."
Angie called in the girls, "Gyp! Nana! Come here!" The girls excitedly ran into the room, and their smiles faded. "What's wrong?" 
I sat up, "Nothing, Leena is harassing me."
Gypsy scanned me, "You need to eat. You look sick." I shook my head, "I can't. The fans-"
Leena said, "Those aren't fans!" Everyone turned to Leena in shock. 
Leena wasn't the type of girl to yell. She always held back. Hearing her get frustrated was devastating.
"Noona..." Leena turned to Gypsy, "She's killing herself. Call oppa and tell him Y/N isn't performing tomorrow. She'll pass out." 
Gypsy stood up, "I will. Y/N, you gotta stay home and rest up. You're gonna have to go on a hiatus."
The words sunk deep. "A hiatus- That's too far."
Gypsy shook her head sternly, "I'm serious. You have to listen to your Noona! I'm two years older. 20, you're 18. You have to listen."
I shrunk, "Whose gonna teach you the choreo." Angie sheepishly smiled. She rubbed her thumb on my thigh, "Rest. I'll tell oppa to sneak in some food."
They walked out, and I sat in my room dumbfounded. 
They can't just do that, can they?
Suddenly, a text came in.
.
.
.
Unknown Number
It's Ni-ki
Unknown Number
(sent youtube short)
That's us lol
Ni-ki Minaj
Have you seen the comments???
Ni-ki Minaj
PFFTT they're calling us a love triangle
You
Lol that's really funny.
Ni-ki Minaj
I can't tell if your normally a dry texter or if something is wrong
You
My girls just told me there putting me on hiatus🧍🏾‍♀️
Ni-ki Minaj
??? What happened in the span of 5 hours?💀
You
I hadn't eaten and I felt a little sick
You
Now the girls are calling my manager to snitch
Ni-ki Minaj
Why aren't you eating???
Ni-ki Minaj
You need to eat so much more... It's not good for you
You
I know but my fans
You
They bullied me for my curves and my personality then i got sexualized and the deepfakes and the plastic surgery allegations and I can't take it anymore.
You
I'm trying my best to be perfect you know??? Everyone has a problem with anything I do
Ni-ki Minaj
You'd be surprised how much I get that.
Ni-ki Minaj
I debuted at 14 and grown women used to say weird shit about me too so don't think you're alone in this
Ni-ki Minaj
I got bullied for a lot of things and I had to grow up quickly.
You
That's why you try to act all mysterious?
Ni-ki Minaj
I wouldn't say that I just had to chill out and mature
You
That's what I mean though. We're still teenagers why do we have to grow up so fast...
Ni-ki Minaj
Our job requires us to.
Ni-ki Minaj
You should rest up though.
You
🙁
.
.
.
Mr. Lee knocked on my door, "I brought some rice and chicken." I groaned, "Come in."
Mr. Lee smiled as he handed me the takeout bag. "Kiddo... I don't want you to-"
I stopped him, "Oppa. It's fine. I'm okay."
Mr. Lee sighed, "You know Gypsy put me up to this. She is a scary girl. I'm almost half her age."
I laughed as I opened the container of rice. I took my spoon to the fresh, steamy rice.
"You okay, though? Genuinely. I don't want you to think about those comments."
I froze.
"I'm not."
He lifted my wrist, "You are. You're so thin now. I want you to be healthy."
I bit my lip and looked away, "I know." Mr. Lee's bottom lip quivered, "Your parents told me that your life was in my hands now. I don't want you to get hurt or pass out. I need you to stay healthy. I don't want you to lose your spark."
He hugged me, and I let out an annoyed huff as he began to cry. I rubbed his back because, somehow, I ended up comforting him. 
However, It meant a lot that he was this concerned for me.
When he pulled away, his nose had snot running down. I grabbed a takeout napkin, "God, Mr. Lee." I put it to his nose and said, "Blow." He blew out his nose, and I collected his nasty snot.
He hugged me one last time. He said in my neck, "Call me if you need me." He walked out, and I couldn't help but laugh out of disbelief. He's so dramatic.
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The statement was put out that night, and the next day, I had the entire house to myself. My locs were in a ponytail, and I wore my bear slipper and a one-piece pink bodycon pajama set.
I looked sexy. I checked myself out in the mirror and smiled. "Let me clean up the house a little."
I turned on my speaker and started blasting StrayKids. I was actually a predebut stan. Now that they are technically my co-workers, I feel embarrassed about it.
I picked up the dirty socks and cups and cleaned the dishes in the sink. It had been about an hour of hard work before I heard a knock on my door. 
I stepped to the door and looked through the peephole. 
I opened the door quickly, "What the-" Ni-ki walked in with a bag of takeout, "I brought you dinner since you apparently don't eat."
He looked me up and down. Staring at my plush thighs and big breasts. 
He saw the tattoo on my chest. "You have a tattoo?" I nodded, "I got it when I was 16. My mom let me."
He pulled the fabric back with his long, slim fingers. His cold hand brushed against my collarbone, and I flinched away. "Sorry for the cold hands. I walked here."
I quirked an eyebrow, "How far do you live?" He smiled, "We live in the same apartment complex."
I tilted my head, and his eyes flicked back to the tattoo, "It's cute." It was a small Ponyo fish under my collarbone.
"Why?" I looked away, "My dad used to watch it with me." My eyes followed his.
He was concerned, "He died?" I nodded, "Yeah. It was a long time ago, though." Ni-ki invited himself to the couch and opened up the bag of food. 
I sat next to him as he carefully portioned the meal. His portion was small but more weighty than mine.
"You should eat a lot more." Ni-ki side-eyed me, "I eat how I want." I laughed and reached for the plastic fork.
"Do you not know how to eat with chopsticks?" I looked at the wooden chopsticks and said, "No." He shoved a sushi in my mouth and sighed, "Eat." I chewed the sushi carefully, inspecting the flavor. 
The burst of flavor from the seasoned crab danced on my tastebuds. "MM!" He smiled, "The guys hate when I get this sushi. I'm glad you like it." 
I quirked an eyebrow, "Why? It tastes so good." My mouth was still full. He laughed, "Chew your food first."
I watched as he put the chopsticks to his mouth, and the realization set in. 
I touched my lips while I thought.
He just put those in my mouth.
He chewed like nothing was wrong and continued, "I guess the seasoning is too much." I said bluntly, "They don't know how to season food well."
NI-ki laughed, "Definitely not."
I smiled while looking at him eat. I ate three and started to feel stuffed.
"You want my last one?" I stuck my fork in the sushi roll and pointed at his face to grab.
He unexpectedly watched me as he wrapped his lips over my fork.
He chewed the food, still staring at me. 
Again? Should I kiss him?
I tilted my head and leaned in. Ni-ki raised his hand to take the sesame seed from my cheek. His thumb ran across my cheek sweetly.
He swallowed his food, and I leaned in closer. My lips softly pressed into his.
I pulled back suddenly. I felt nervous. Ni-ki was quick to smile, "Am I making you nervous?" My body tensed, "No!"
Ni-ki laughed. His eyes looked full of warmth. I smiled at him as he leaned in.
His lips were firm as he kissed mine. He held his body with one hand as he leaned us back. 
His hand gently slid behind my head as I fell backward on the couch. His knee went between my legs as his kiss deepened.
His tongue slipped into my mouth as I gasped. He pulled back, "You good?" I nodded, "Mhm, I just... I didn't expect-" 
I cut myself off as I got lost in his eyes. He searched for an answer. "How often do you kiss guys, Y/N?" 
I shyly smiled, "Haven't for a year." He asked carefully, "And sex?" 
"Never."
Ni-ki blinked. "Really? That's unexpected. I thought..." I rolled my eyes, "That I was a hoe? I only know how to move my body sexily."
He looked over my face, and he started getting from on top of me. I pulled his collar, "Wait." He froze, "What do you mean wait?" 
"Walk me through it?" Ni-ki looked at my hand on my collar and kissed it. "You sure? We can stop." I shook my head, "No... I want to."
He smiled, "Alright, c'mon." He picked me up, threw me over his shoulder, and asked, "Which room?" 
I giggled, "It's the last one."
He opened the door and gently placed me on the bed to tower over me again, "Where are your members?" I smiled and said, "Too busy. They don't come back until midnight." 
His hand roamed to my hip, "We're gonna have a lot to talk about after this."
My hand stopped at his chest, "What does that mean? You don't wanna date?" 
His smirk took his face, "I do. That's what we have to talk about." "Well, we just talked about it then."
The grin on my face made his eyes melt. His face softened, "Yeah, but we're gonna have to hide some things."
His hair flowed over my face, tickling my nose. I scrunched it, and he kissed me.
"You're cute when you wanna be. You know that?"
I rolled my eyes, "Shut up and kiss me." He obliged quickly, leaning in.
Our kisses clicked. My lips parted, and Ni-ki slipped his tongue between them. My hand traveled to his hair. I messed it up as I wrapped my legs around his waist to pull him in closer.
Ni-ki's dick bumped into my pelvic bone. He groaned in my mouth. He bit my bottom lip, and he pulled away. "Protection?"
I shook my head, "Check Angie's room." He was quick to run off without asking which room it was.
I heard him rummage through everyone's drawers before running back. "I found some."
I looked at the two packs of condoms, "You need two?" He shrugged, "You never know." I saw the silver words flash under the light.
"Extra large?" He bit his bottom lip as he stared at me, "I won't go too deep. I'll ensure to get you warmed up enough to handle it."
I blinked at him in shock, "Okay." He leaned back down to kiss me quickly before taking his shirt off. 
I let out a gasp before closing my eyes. "Hey?" His tone suddenly softened, "I'm gonna take care of you. I don't care if I'm two inches deep in you. You can always tell me when to stop."
I took a deep breath. Ni-ki kissed me again, and my eyes fluttered closed.
His kisses trailed to my neck. His lips pressed against my skin delicately until I let out a gasp.
He sucked on my neck as I squirmed under his grasp. With one hand, Ni-ki held me down onto the mattress.
My body seeped with its weight into the delicate fabric. Ni-ki kissed down my chest as he asked, "Can you take this off?" I complied in an instant.
I wanted this... but I was also nervous.
Ni-ki watched me unbutton my pajamas, and he trailed to my breast. He unclipped my bra but kept them covering my boobs.
He kissed me deeply again. His hand cupped my face with affection.
His hands were warm now. 
He groped my boob, and I whined in his mouth. He pulled away to check on me. He wanted to make sure I was enjoying it, I'm guessing.
He leaned back in once he saw my face. My eyes were squeezed shut, so I didn't know what that meant to him.
His finger rolled my nipple between the pads of his fingers. I gasped at the sensation, and my hips started moving on its own. 
His knee moved to my middle, and I had a quick release. "Mm~"
Ni-ki smiled, "You liked that?"
He pulled his pants off quickly and pulled the sheets over us. "You're gonna get cold."
He started to kiss down my stomach as he made his way to the last button.
"I'm ready." He looked up at me. His eyes were filled with lust and hunger but also carefulness.
His fingers hooked to the end of the one piece, and he gently slid them down. 
My cow print panties were in his blurry view. "You're so adorable, even down to your underwear."
I bit my lip as he hooked his fingers under my panties and slid them down. 
I felt my sticky, slick, unstick from the fabric.
"Fuck, you're so wet, baby."
I whimpered as I felt the air of his breath brush against my clit. "Please..."
"Please, what, baby? Use your big girl words."
I whined, "Please touch me."
His thumb rubbed my bud gently. My legs shook from that simple touch. I was feeling electric. My pussy was buzzing with anticipation from him.
I needed him to fill me up.
His finger slipped into my hole, and I gasped. "You're so tight."
His eyes locked with mine as he sunk his fingers deeper.
I held back a moan as he pulled out and pushed back in.
I was wrapping myself around him again.
His long pale fingers were gathering cum at the knuckle. I felt like I was about to burst. 
I released all over his fingers, quickly exhausted. "Ni-ki..." He tilted his head, "What's up?"
"That felt good." He kissed my forehead endearingly, "I'm glad."
He pulled both my thighs closer to his head as his mouth connected to my clit. I moaned as I felt his wet tongue flick my bud.
He sucked on my entrance, licking for the last of my cum.
I was a moaning mess as I felt another orgasm starting to wash over me.
"Nobody else ever made you feel like this, huh?"
I shook my head as his mouth reconnected with my clit.
My nails dug into his scalp as I gripped his hair.
My thighs rested on his shoulders as I squeezed around his neck. My body started to twitch as the build-up came back.
"Oh~ That feels good."
I felt my pussy flutter around his pale fingers, "Don't hold back on me."
The tight feeling in my stomach started to release as I came. My grip tightened, and my back arched from the sensation. 
"Haa~" I moaned out. Ni-ki just sat and watched as I released my sticky mess over his fingers.
Ni-ki pulled his fingers out and watched my cum leak out behind him. His eyes darkened as he watched it slide down my folds. 
When his eyes flickered to mine, they were dark with hunger.
"You ready?" My eyes widened, "Yeah."
He kissed me deeply as he towered over me. "Are you sure?" My eyes traced the lines of his sharp features. My lips caught in my teeth as I nodded silently.
Ni-ki pulled down his underwear, and his long thick dick slapped against his stomach. "I'm so hard right now, Y/N."
I whimpered just from the sight of his width. His cream topped his tip like a sundae.
I watched as he rubbed himself. A hiss left his mouth as his head dove back. "Fuck! Y/N, please." I blinked, "Ni-ki... I want you inside me."
He leaned over and rubbed his girthy length against my clit. I whined, "Please, Ni-ki." 
My slick was coating the bottom of his dick. My breath hitched when I saw his dick go past my belly button. 
"Are you gonna put the whole thing in me?"
Ni-ki smiled, "We'll work on that. But not today." He cupped my cheek and caressed it gently. He looked down at his dick and started angling it. 
He pushed through my folds, filling me up. The pain was heavy, but then it turned to pleasure quickly. I moaned desperately. "Ah!~"
Ni-ki was looking me over with concern. My legs started shaking from pleasure. 
He hadn't even moved yet, and I was already cumming around him. 
Ni-ki watched as my cum leaked between us. Ni-ki squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to keep himself restricted. "You came?" I nodded innocently. "Mm~" 
I didn't mean for it to come out as a moan, but Ni-ki just laughed. He kissed my neck and asked, "Can I move now?" I nodded as I carefully wrapped my legs around his waist. His hands traced to my thigh and hips. 
He slowly pulled out to push back into me. My eyes fluttered closed from the pleasure of him hitting my spot.
He groaned in pleasure. I whined, "More." He moved a little faster. It was still painfully slow.
My hands traced his back as my nails dug in. Ni-ki groaned again. He was trying so hard to hold back for me.
"Faster!" Ni-ki finally snapped his hips into me. I yelped in response. He pulled away from my neck. He stared at me as his fast pace made me lose myself.
My boobs jiggled to his pace, and he reached for them to fondle. I bit my lip, "Nng~" 
I gasped as he got rough. "Fuck! Ni-ki! Yes!" He babbled back, "You're so sexy, baby. So tight for me."
I felt the knot starting to form in my stomach again. Ni-ki was filling me up with his thick cock until I shook uncontrollably.
"I'm gonna cum." Ni-ki was getting sloppier as I moaned out from my release. Ni-ki pulled out quickly cumming all over me and his stomach. 
"I forgot to put the condom on."
His jaw was still tight, and his muscles were tense. My heart was racing, and I felt hot. 
I was still catching my breath as Ni-ki lied down next to me. He stared at the ceiling, silently catching his breath.
When I finally caught my breath, I put my head on his chest and slid my hand across his bare waist. "You did a good job Y/N." 
I deep breathed, "We have to be together now, you know that, right?" He slightly lifted his head, "I know. Don't worry."
He kissed my head, and I closed my eyes to sleep.
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reverie-starlight · 8 months ago
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happy monday!! tiny little semi thoughts bc I miss him <3 gn!reader, no physical descriptions. is this cheesy? extremely. but I had fun writing it hehe. the semi eita appreciation agenda lives on. (<- it's not a semi fic if I don't add that)
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the first time semi wrote a song for you, he hadn't even been aware you were his muse until it was finished. it was purely subconscious, the result of all of his suppressed feelings for you finally demanding to be heard.
he describes the writing process as being blackout drunk- the words were just flowing out of him one day and weren't registering in his mind at all. originally the song was meant to help him work through some weird, foreign emotions in his chest that had been around more often than not around the time of it's "conception".
it wasn't until he read back the lyrics about someone's laugh being his favourite melody, their touch lighting up a fire within him (and other metaphors he could absolutely work into his writing far better today than he could then at nineteen) that images of you crept into his mind. he suddenly realized those feelings only ever surfaced around a certain someone.
you were the muse of his first ever love song (and what would become the band’s big breakthrough single).
he kept it to himself for a while, obviously needing to come to terms with the fact he was in love with someone who surely only considered him a friend.
but he worked on the chords and melodies a bit every day, slowly working up the courage to record it with his band and let you be the first to hear the finished product.
now, six years later, you've inspired countless other songs, each as beautiful and loving as their predecessors. you got to hear them all before the rest of the world did- perks of having the front man as your fiancé. all of his love letters to you were adored by the fans, of course...
but that first song, the one that was named after you? that one will always be the fan favourite. and more importantly yours, because not only does it remind you of such a sweet time in your life, it acts as a reminder of how far you’ve both come since then.
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this is so cutesy, I want to be someone’s muse :/
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desmon1995 · 3 months ago
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Derailed: The Anthem of Anxiety
Derailed this is more often than not held as at least one of the top five songs from the album and I wanted to make an ode to it to analyze I think why it's easily one of the best songs that shows that LMM and Eisa Davis are masters of their craft.
*Derailed* hits like a warped reflection of one of Lin-Manuel Miranda’s iconic madrigals—the kind where overlapping voices collide into a storm of sound and emotion. If it had a kindred spirit, it might be *Blackout* from *In the Heights*, but twisted into something darker, more unhinged, like anxiety given a melody.
What makes *Derailed* particularly striking is how it opens from Cleon’s first-person perspective, recounting the moment her life was literally and figuratively derailed at a train in Dekalb. If we assume the album takes place in the same gritty 1979 as the film, it’s tempting to link Cleon’s story to the infamous 1961 train derailment at Lincoln Highway and Fourth Street. The idea of her being a child caught in the chaos is a chilling one, though history complicates the narrative—this wasn’t a passenger train, and the only children involved were in cars nearby, not on board. Still, the imagery of that disaster looms large, adding an eerie layer of plausibility to Cleon’s backstory.
The crash out Cleon is having is understandable considering she saw one of her inspiration Cyrus gets shot in the head and she managed to actually witness Luther committing the murder.
(also note the Davis stated that she sprinkled some Hamilton references throughout this song and the world falls down is the first one).
I think this is where one of the more compelling parts happens because Luther and by extension his gang begin to rally everybody around the idea that the Warriors are the ones who diced Cyrus.
Musically, we can hear just how powerful Luther's voice is because this song shifts into being a Black Sabbath styled riff that has the honor of being the first time Rock being introduced into the album.
I wanted to hone in on this that Luther and by extension the cops are defined by rock and roll/metal is another really clever use of thematic storytelling.
For those who may not know, these genres WERE CREATED BY POC, primarily African Americans with Chuck Berry being the father of rock and roll along with big mama thornton, and heavy metal owing its creation to Jimi Hendrix.
Luther and his gang were given a seat at the cookout and metaphorically and literally used that opportunity to devastate said community with a full-blown hate crime while simultaneously appropriating something from that culture as if it's theirs.
Tangent asid, Luther takes advantage of all of the chaos and blames the Warriors which all of the predominant male gang members just follow because at the end of the day the loudest white voice in the room will always be a guiding voice unknowing or not in a very eurocentric country.
if you watch the movie, Cleon is literally being attacked by the Rouges and Griffs because she can't really see a place to escape and as she's being overpowered she yells for the Warriors to escape.
I do find an interesting that both Swan and Ajax are both the ones coordinating the girls through all the chaos with Ajax telling everybody to stay down and Swan trying to find an opening for them to escape.
Cochise seems to be the primary muscle during this portion as well.
Something I didn't really noticed until I actually looked at the lyric video today was that in the background you can hear the other gang saying things like " Cyrus GOES DOWN and Sirens" which is really neat.
Derailed is also super important because it's the one that introduces all of the motifs of the various characters.
Ajax near the end laments that she hates running, Luther as I said, is in the background yelling that Cyrus went down which foreshadows his own song going down, and then there's Fox's character Arc.
Fox’s melody and lyrics here are both reprised in Reunion Square, where the words ‘we’ and ‘us’ are changed to ‘I’ as Fox fights the cop; interesting to note that the cop also sings this melody underneath Fox in Reunion Square, harmonising to show that he, too, has only one goal – survival – in that moment.
Pippa Soo is the phenomenal actress that plays both Eliza Hamilton and Fox, and in many ways these characters mirror one another since both of them want to keep their loved ones alive but Fox sort of pulls a Philip Hamilton because Fox starts off as being kind of the most haughty of the Warriors and as noted on the reddit, she even speaks in a much more sultry voice during her Cypher verse and to make yourself seem on the level as her older sisters (she seems to be trying to emulate Ajax).
Another thing that I want to comment on is the Griff's " WHO WILL SAVE US"
This cry could be said to draw a comparison between Cyrus and a messiah figure like Jesus.The vision she shared with the crews of the 5 boroughs promised them a city they could feel safe in if they trust in each other, similar to the promise Jesus makes to deliver the Israelites to a land of milk and honey if they trust in him (Exodus 3:8 KJV). She also encourages them to view each other as brothers and sisters under this new truce and to protect each other accordingly – also similar to how those who follow the will of God are viewed as brothers and sisters in the eyes of Jesus (Matthew 12:48-50). Overall, this vision promised some form of salavation for the crews of New York just as a messiah promises salvation to their people.The fact that the Riffs ask who will save them now suggests they viewed Cyrus as their messiah for a promised future and that without her, that future is lost.
Masai largely echoes the sentiment later on in " Still Breathing" were after he finishes beating up Cleon he ends up puking his emotions out.
It's been talked about the death, but I feel like at that point Cyrus and the fact that you was a woman did it register she ended up becoming something completely non-binary, a symbol.
While the way her game went about it was completely wrong, it shows that her spirit can metaphorically be embodied by anybody regardless of who they are but it seems like most of the gangs saw her as more than your average woman which mistakenly causes them to revert back to punching down on others like marginalize women.
The song ends with Luther chanting his iconic "Warriors come out and play" as the Warriors run away through the cemetery.
Although you can't see it, in the movie Cleon completely dismantle Luther which again foreshadows what's about to happen to him later on.
Luther for whatever reason has headcannoned the Warriors is being a bunch of weak little girls that are running away for their lives but in actuality they're a pride of lionesses the know how to maneuver their way through tough situations even when society is beating them throughout the night.
He finds out the hard way when he and Crosby ride into their den on Coney Island and Swan gives him a one-sided beatdown.
And that's the analysis.
Derailed is incredibly loaded in a good way and out of literally any musical number I've seen for a while does a great job of establishing everything without beating you over the head.
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spnbabe67 · 6 months ago
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Cry Little Girl, Nobody Does It Like You Do
Kinktober Day 26: Dacryphilia (S.B)
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Pairing: Soldier Boy x Original Female Character
Warnings: Smut, PiV, Overstimulation, Edging, Fingering, Oral (F. Rec)
Summary: Part two to She Keeps Me Up
Word Count: 1597
Authors Note: Title inspired by the song Daddy Issues by The Neighborhood.
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Their penthouse overlooking the New York skyline was spacious, an entire wall of their bedroom was entirely floor to ceiling windows framed with blackout curtains for those mornings after drinking and snorting too much into their systems. Not that the hangover was anything compared to what they were like back before the Compound V coursing through her veins, but the loud sounds of NYC was already a headache waiting to happen without the factor of drugs and alcohol to contend with. The Alaskan king sat squarely against the far wall of the bedroom, the sheets rarely made with how often they make a mess of them. 
Today wasn’t an exception, the ruffled charcoal sheets embracing Odessa as Ben tossed her onto the mattress. She laughed as she bounced once, twice, before stretching out her arms and legs, her auburn hair fanning out around her head. The metallic clanking of buckles and the hushing of leather and cloth hitting the floor reached her ears as she knew Ben was stripping out of his suit. 
Odessa hummed, a smile curling her lips upwards as the bed dipped below her, Ben’s warm body crawling over her. Her legs fell open to accommodate for his shoulders to notch between them as he kissed his way up her belly, paying attention to every spot, no matter how miniscule, that had her squirming below him, already revved back up. Finally, she was able to savor the feel of his bare body, feel his warmth above her as his mouth found her navel in the form of open mouthed kisses. 
Odessa knotted her fingers in his hair, her other hand gripping the sheets in an attempt to steady herself, to keep herself grounded as Ben chuckled darkly against her belly, green eyed gaze catching hers from between her legs. His arm hooked around her thigh, fingers delving into the patch of neatly trimmed hair at the apex of her thighs, tracing his fingertip against her folds and damn near everywhere but where she wanted him.
“Ben.” Odessa ground out, her hips flexing upwards in an attempt to guide his hand to her heat. “What’d I say about your teasing?” 
“If you tell me what you want I might not hafta resort to teasing.” Ben countered from between her legs, emphasizing his words with a squeeze to her thigh, removing his hand from her heat all together.
“More, Ben. Just touch me goddamnit!” Odessa growled, tugging harshly on his hair, desperately seeking some attention to her throbbing clit. 
She didn’t like his mischievous smirk etched upon his lips, the dangerous glint in his eye right before he pressed on. But Odessa quickly forgot about it at the first pass of his tongue against her soaked core, glistening with her own slick mixed with his spend from their kitchen escapades. At first blush you’d think a guy like Ben would balk at the idea of eating his own cum, but he enthusiastically explored her folds with his tongue, letting the muscle delve into her entrance before dragging upwards to flick her clit. Odessa rutted her hips against his mouth, his trimmed beard scratching the sensitive skin on the inside of her thighs adding to the plethora of overwhelming sensations across her body. Her head fell back against the bed, eyes fluttering shut as that pull in her low belly started to grow tighter and tighter. Almost, almost. 
Then Ben, the bastard, pulled away right as the coil was primed to snap. Odessa propped herself up on an elbow, mouth falling open. “Did you just-”
Her protests were cut short as Ben attached his lips back around her clit, sucking hard. His ministrations pulled breathy moans from her as that wave of euphoria started building again, her shaky thighs growing tight around his head.  Her breathing had long since turned into ragged panting, desperately pulling in as much oxygen into her lungs. Odessa practically vibrated with the anticipation coursing through her system, inching closer and closer to that high. 
“Benjamin!” Odessa followed his name with a string of curses as he pulled away at the last second. 
The son of a bitch had the gall to chuckle against her desperate pussy. Odessa went to pull away, frustrated and thoroughly done with his antics, but he quickly ensnared her hips with his arms, and for all the superhuman abilities granted to her, she wasn’t as strong as him. Again his teeth closed around her clit, pulling a desperate whine from her lips. Her thoughts had started to go lazy, unable to focus on anything other than the feeling of Ben’s hot mouth suckling at her clit, his tongue circling her entrance before plunging it in and out of her. His name fell from her lips encased in a plea for more, more, more. She felt tears prick at the corner of her eyes as finally that ebbing and flowing wave of euphoria crashed over her, a ragged moan clawing its way up her throat, back arching clear off the bed, toes curling
But her relief was short lived as Ben’s mouth continued its assault on her oversensative folds. His iron-clad hold on her hips made it impossible for her to worm away from his relentless tongue continuing to flick along her clit so that her fruitless attempts to squirm away from the overstimulating sensations only made it worse. She choked on a breath as another orgasm sent shocks down her spin. It was so much, the tears that had been pricking at her eyes starting to well up, trickling down the sides of her face.
“Too much. I’s ‘nough.” Odessa slurred, so far gone to form a coherent sentence, blinking away the saltwater brimming in her eyes.
“I thought you wanted more, Dess.” Ben feigned innocent, not bothering to pull his mouth, beard soaked with her slick, far from her core. The rumble of his voice only made the overstimulation worse. “Only givin’ you what you wanted.”
Odessa cursed him, still trying to worm away to no avail. Ben continued his assault, pulling another orgasm from her trembling body until tears streamed down her face and down the apples of his cheeks. At last Ben pulled away from her sopping core crawling up her body, his lips marking his trail. With each new tear rolling down her face she felt his cock twitch against her inner thigh, the tip already weeping with a bead of precum. He dipped his head down to drag the tip of his tongue along the damp tracks her tears had left. Odessa had half a mind to push him off her, say ‘fuck you’ to his teasing. But she wasn't really all that mad, the bastard was too cunning for his own good; he followed her instructions to a ‘T’. 
“Got nothin’ to say now, do ya?” He raised his eyebrows at her as he reached down to guide the head of his cock through her folds, instantly reinvigorating her waning sensitivity. 
She rolled her eyes, pulling him down to kiss her. Odessa could taste her slick strongly on his tongue as she swept her own into his mouth in the same breath his cock bullied its way into her. Her legs fell open to allow his waist to slot between them, his thrusts slow but sharp each time he pistoned his hips into hers. This was entirely for his own gratification, the rhythm he set, how harshly his hips snapped upwards into her, but nevertheless Odessa felt yet another orgasm building at the sensation of his cock brushing every nerve and sensitive spot within her inner walls. She let her nails absolutely dig into his golden and freckled shoulders as his movements became harsher and harsher until she felt him hit his release, coming hard inside her. She’d lost track of how many times her high had shook through her, but for what she hoped was the last time tonight her body tensed, legs locking around his waist as she came with a cry into the crook of his neck. 
Ben pulled out of her, moving to sit at the head of the bed. Odessa rolled onto her stomach, pressing her still damp cheek to his thigh as she rested her head on his leg. She could hear him grab a blunt from their stash in the bedside table, the flicking of the lighter as he lit it. 
“You’re an asshole, you know that?” Odessa teased him, reaching up for the reefer after he took a long drag from it.
Ben blew air from between his lips, passing her the weed before snagging a hold of her leg behind her knee, hauling her further up his body, hooking her leg across his own. “You wouldn’t have looked at me twice in the first place if I wasn’t.”
Odessa huffed an amused laugh. “That’s not true. Besides, you have your moments.”
“Mm, how dare you.” They both shared a laugh as Ben dipped his head down to kiss her, sucking the drug straight from her. 
He gripped her cheeks between his thumb and index finger, eyes intense, laced with a thread of vulnerability only she was allowed to see. “I love you, you know that.”
Her gaze reflected that oh so rare sentiment, softening just enough for them both to feel it. And there was no fear, no hesitancy. “I know. And I love you too.”
“Good.” Ben nodded, removing his grip from her face, instead wrapping it around her waist as they both laid there, watching the sun rise from their bed.
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runnning-outof-time · 9 months ago
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on repeat 🔁
Thanks for the tag Cia! @holacia3 🧡
go to 'on repeat'/heavy rotation playlist on spotify/apple music, throw it on shuffle and share the first 10 songs you get
as always…breaking out the ‘What’re You Listening To?’ playlist for this:
Northern Thunder by Zach Bryan
Kill the Lights by The Glorious Sons
Trust by Chris Stapleton
beer by HARDY
Livin’ Next to Leroy by Ashley McBryde
Train (Nashville Sessions) by Jackson Dean
Blackout Betty by Ashley McBryde
Traveling Man by Zach Bryan
Open the Gate by Zach Bryan
Godless, Graceless and Young by The Glorious Sons
special mention: High Road by Koe Wetzel b/c it’s been on repeat in my head all day today.
Tagging: @zablife @little-diable @darklydeliciousdesires @novashelby @toms-cherry-trees @look-at-the-soul @forgottenpeakywriter @emotionalcadaver @huntingingoodwill @writers-hes
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step-and-pen-bu · 3 months ago
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I translated "Haven" by Nilfruits!! (Project Sekai Commission Song)
煮る果実様の「ヘイブン」の拙訳でございます!
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Translated Lyrics:
The combustible words on a scattershot night They thoughtlessly weigh on my mind without end And as soon as I noticed I was scalded I can't live right so I bottle up my contradictions & my imperfections Dousing them in paint I'll seal the lid on my distaste with resin
All this nagging and such, just rushing to the finish with words like "What was it you wanted to do from the start? Can you still do it?" People say, "To vanish from society, a calculation without yield" You berated my sunken self with various voices And each time I would float through the air
If I could love the ruins of our castles in the sky I wonder if I could even love this unfamiliar reality I've always been searching, even today, even tomorrow Though it was painful, I play tough though I can't reach the finish
Haven, O Haven where are you? As long as I can recall it, I'll hold fast to hope Laugh it all away for me, my Měilì ¹ A world where I'm not with you is colorless
If things like sound logic and truth give birth to flame I'll rain fictions upon them someday "Don't let go." I sing on Don't let go, I sing on In a future where both meanings are understood I entrust my life
A blackout², within an empty room I suckled the contents out of habit, tracing the classics³ Consume even the longings Phrases like "A collection of nonsense bears meaning" And "Every dark cloud has a silver lining" Let's believe in such sweet nothings-- How many times have you said that now?
All this nagging and such, just rushing to the finish with words like The things you've wanted to do from the start, will forever⁴ be undoable People say, ”To vanish from society, blasphemy, wriggling, wear and tear!" One of these days, I'll be rid your voice So I suppose I'll just live with my feet planted on the earth?
"Everything is okay it's all right now" And yet, I' unable to think like that I've always been hurting, so just what am I protecting?
I want to love the ruins of our castles in the sky I want to love even this reality as I am Despite it all, on the nights I'm battered by lows I'll always be by your side, clearing your mind
Haven, O Haven surely you're out there As long as I can be struck with inspiration I'll hold fast to reason Laugh it all away for me, my Měilì ¹ A world without you in it is colorless
If things like sound logic and truth give birth to flame I'll rain fictions down upon them someday You think it's all reckless, that it's all just a pipe dream, don't you? And yet, I still believe
Because my Haven will be there Though they're just castles in the sky I will keep on loving them In an empty room I'll light a light This unmistakable present moment I've chosen alongside you
O Haven, surely you'll find me "To the unique beat of my heart, Don't let go." Sing on Don't let go, sing on Both meanings and this moment, I understand them now I carry on living
Footnotes:
0- The title is is Haven; however, it seems that the imagery in the MV & the lyrics also suggest a possible reading of it being Heaven. I think they both can coexist, but Haven is the more accurate translation.
1 - Měilì is a Chinese word meaning beautiful in a feminine sense, it is also a name, it is also used in Nilfruits' other song Haruni which it is used in a similar manner. It may then, be good to consider parallels between that work. Notably, Nilfruits' description of Haruni is "For those who keep living" which parallels various sentiments in this song
2- A blackout here implies that which is used to change from scene to scene upon a theatrical stage
3- Tracing the classics here may imply how people who practice Shodou often extensively practice copying the classic examples of Japanese calligraphy to create a traditional looking style. This is often done extensively before a student is allowed to develop their personal style.
4- 永遠 (Eien) is pronounced Towa, which suggests the homophonic term, 永久 (Towa), which implies a kind of unchanging perpetuity & seems like that the things that cannot be done will always remain unable to be done, its use in this way is regarded as a Poetic Term & an uncommon reading
Translator Notes:
okay, i am a nilfruits DEFENDER when it comes to his vflower tuning, but i am so pleasantly surprised by the prsk tuning of len in this version!!! & of COURSE vbs actually sounds heavenly & angelic oh my goodness this is song is like christmas for me! i love the connections through thematics with "Haruni" & the mv is so lovely… it's absolutely ヘイブンリー hehe
ALSO if you'll indulge me in the akitoya for a bit… the subtle grammatical differences that result in the yearning…. oh they're so terrible i love them so much….
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