#sometimes when i read books i try to imagine what the writer was thinking when writing scenes

[wutheringmights]

Hey yk what I don’t know if I’ve said this before, but ur like…really unfairly hard on ur own writing?? And oddly that makes me feel better when I see so many mistakes/flaws in my own writing because if YOU see a bunch of flaws in urs, and I never notice them, then maybe others don’t see the flaws in my writing either. does that make sense??

Anyway kudos x 1 million on ctb’s latest chapter!!! I was CACKLINF over this one fr fr 🙏🙏

Thanks! I'm glad you liked the chapter!

Trust me, I try to be as fair to my writing as possible. I feel like my writing only improved when I started reading back what I wrote and finding areas I actively need to improve. I am way more enthusiastic about my writing chops now than I have been in years past.

I think I just fall victim to wishing my writing wasn't mine. To me, a good piece of writing melts away until you can hardly notice the words on the page. If you see the words there, it's because they are used in an interesting way.

Every word I write holds the moment of time when I wrote it. I can go back through anything I wrote and remember every frustration I had picking words, fixing sentence structures, and agonizing over characters.

The prose never melts away. I can see every brick I lay and know exactly why I put it there. I forget sometimes that people can't read my prose like a fortune teller discerning my palm.

[bookishdiplodocus]

The Neurodivergent Writer’s Guide to Fun and Productivity

(Even when life beats you down)

Look, I’m a mom, I have ADHD, I’m a spoonie. To say that I don’t have heaps of energy to spare and I struggle with consistency is an understatement. For years, I tried to write consistently, but I couldn’t manage to keep up with habits I built and deadlines I set.

So fuck neurodivergent guides on building habits, fuck “eat the frog first”, fuck “it’s all in the grind”, and fuck “you just need time management”—here is how I manage to write often and a lot.

Focus on having fun, not on the outcome

This was the groundwork I had to lay before I could even start my streak. At an online writing conference, someone said: “If you push yourself and meet your goals, and you publish your book, but you haven’t enjoyed the process… What’s the point?” and hoo boy, that question hit me like a truck.

I was so caught up in the narrative of “You’ve got to show up for what’s important” and “Push through if you really want to get it done”. For a few years, I used to read all these productivity books about grinding your way to success, and along the way I started using the same language as they did. And I notice a lot of you do so, too.

But your brain doesn’t like to grind. No-one’s brain does, and especially no neurodivergent brain. If having to write gives you stress or if you put pressure on yourself for not writing (enough), your brain’s going to say: “Huh. Writing gives us stress, we’re going to try to avoid it in the future.”

So before I could even try to write regularly, I needed to teach my brain once again that writing is fun. I switched from countable goals like words or time to non-countable goals like “fun” and “flow”.

Rewire my brain: writing is fun and I’m good at it

I used everything I knew about neuroscience, psychology, and social sciences. These are some of the things I did before and during a writing session. Usually not all at once, and after a while I didn’t need these strategies anymore, although I sometimes go back to them when necessary.

I journalled all the negative thoughts I had around writing and try to reason them away, using arguments I knew in my heart were true. (The last part is the crux.) Imagine being supportive to a writer friend with crippling insecurities, only the friend is you.

Not setting any goals didn’t work for me—I still nurtured unwanted expectations. So I did set goals, but made them non-countable, like “have fun”, “get in the flow”, or “write”. Did I write? Yes. Success! Your brain doesn’t actually care about how high the goal is, it cares about meeting whatever goal you set.

I didn’t even track how many words I wrote. Not relevant.

I set an alarm for a short time (like 10 minutes) and forbade myself to exceed that time. The idea was that if I write until I run out of mojo, my brain learns that writing drains the mojo. If I write for 10 minutes and have fun, my brain learns that writing is fun and wants to do it again.

Reinforce the fact that writing makes you happy by rewarding your brain immediately afterwards. You know what works best for you: a walk, a golden sticker, chocolate, cuddle your dog, whatever makes you happy.

I conditioned myself to associate writing with specific stimuli: that album, that smell, that tea, that place. Any stimulus can work, so pick one you like. I consciously chose several stimuli so I could switch them up, and the conditioning stays active as long as I don’t muddle it with other associations.

Use a ritual to signal to your brain that Writing Time is about to begin to get into the zone easier and faster. I guess this is a kind of conditioning as well? Meditation, music, lighting a candle… Pick your stimulus and stick with it.

Specifically for rewiring my brain, I started a new WIP that had no emotional connotations attached to it, nor any pressure to get finished or, heaven forbid, meet quality norms. I don’t think these techniques above would have worked as well if I had applied them on writing my novel.

It wasn’t until I could confidently say I enjoyed writing again, that I could start building up a consistent habit. No more pushing myself.

I lowered my definition for success

When I say that nowadays I write every day, that’s literally it. I don’t set out to write 1,000 or 500 or 10 words every day (tried it, failed to keep up with it every time)—the only marker for success when it comes to my streak is to write at least one word, even on the days when my brain goes “naaahhh”. On those days, it suffices to send myself a text with a few keywords or a snippet. It’s not “success on a technicality (derogatory)”, because most of those snippets and ideas get used in actual stories later. And if they don’t, they don’t. It’s still writing. No writing is ever wasted.

A side note on high expectations, imposter syndrome, and perfectionism

Obviously, “Setting a ridiculously low goal” isn’t something I invented. I actually got it from those productivity books, only I never got it to work. I used to tell myself: “It’s okay if I don’t write for an hour, because my goal is to write for 20 minutes and if I happen to keep going for, say, an hour, that’s a bonus.” Right? So I set the goal for 20 minutes, wrote for 35 minutes, and instead of feeling like I exceeded my goal, I felt disappointed because apparently I was still hoping for the bonus scenario to happen. I didn’t know how to set a goal so low and believe it.

I think the trick to making it work this time lies more in the groundwork of training my brain to enjoy writing again than in the fact that my daily goal is ridiculously low. I believe I’m a writer, because I prove it to myself every day. Every success I hit reinforces the idea that I’m a writer. It’s an extra ward against imposter syndrome.

Knowing that I can still come up with a few lines of dialogue on the Really Bad Days—days when I struggle to brush my teeth, the day when I had a panic attack in the supermarket, or the day my kid got hit by a car—teaches me that I can write on the mere Bad-ish Days.

The more I do it, the more I do it

The irony is that setting a ridiculously low goal almost immediately led to writing more and more often. The most difficult step is to start a new habit. After just a few weeks, I noticed that I needed less time and energy to get into the zone. I no longer needed all the strategies I listed above.

Another perk I noticed, was an increased writing speed. After just a few months of writing every day, my average speed went from 600 words per hour to 1,500 wph, regularly exceeding 2,000 wph without any loss of quality.

Talking about quality: I could see myself becoming a better writer with every passing month. Writing better dialogue, interiority, chemistry, humour, descriptions, whatever: they all improved noticeably, and I wasn’t a bad writer to begin with.

The increased speed means I get more done with the same amount of energy spent. I used to write around 2,000-5,000 words per month, some months none at all. Nowadays I effortlessly write 30,000 words per month. I didn’t set out to write more, it’s just a nice perk.

Look, I’m not saying you should write every day if it doesn’t work for you. My point is: the more often you write, the easier it will be.

No pressure

Yes, I’m still working on my novel, but I’m not racing through it. I produce two or three chapters per month, and the rest of my time goes to short stories my brain keeps projecting on the inside of my eyelids when I’m trying to sleep. I might as well write them down, right?

These short stories started out as self-indulgence, and even now that I take them more seriously, they are still just for me. I don’t intend to ever publish them, no-one will ever read them, they can suck if they suck. The unintended consequence was that my short stories are some of my best writing, because there’s no pressure, it’s pure fun.

Does it make sense to spend, say, 90% of my output on stories no-one else will ever read? Wouldn’t it be better to spend all that creative energy and time on my novel? Well, yes. If you find the magic trick, let me know, because I haven’t found it yet. The short stories don’t cannibalize on the novel, because they require different mindsets. If I stopped writing the short stories, I wouldn’t produce more chapters. (I tried. Maybe in the future? Fingers crossed.)

Don’t wait for inspiration to hit

There’s a quote by Picasso: “Inspiration hits, but it has to find you working.” I strongly agree. Writing is not some mystical, muse-y gift, it’s a skill and inspiration does exist, but usually it’s brought on by doing the work. So just get started and inspiration will come to you.

Accountability and community

Having social factors in your toolbox is invaluable. I have an offline writing friend I take long walks with, I host a monthly writing club on Discord, and I have another group on Discord that holds me accountable every day. They all motivate me in different ways and it’s such a nice thing to share my successes with people who truly understand how hard it can be.

The productivity books taught me that if you want to make a big change in your life or attitude, surrounding yourself with people who already embody your ideal or your goal huuuugely helps. The fact that I have these productive people around me who also prioritize writing, makes it easier for me to stick to my own priorities.

Your toolbox

The idea is to have several techniques at your disposal to help you stay consistent. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket by focussing on just one technique. Keep all of them close, and if one stops working or doesn’t inspire you today, pivot and pick another one.

After a while, most “tools” run in the background once they are established. Things like surrounding myself with my writing friends, keeping up with my daily streak, and listening to the album I conditioned myself with don’t require any energy, and they still remain hugely beneficial.

Do you have any other techniques? I’d love to hear about them!

I hope this was useful. Happy writing!

[loveandleases]

THIRD ASK (honestly, I'm not sure if you'd even wanna answer this XD I can feel the sins on this one):

Okay, this is a reaction for each RO, in rela stage, to highlight a comeback of how they had their first meet with MC and/or one of the highlighted moments. (You'll see why below)

Cam: He just came home, probably pent up (?) and he just comes home to see MC looking at him knowingly and suggestively licking the cream off the oreo before smiling adoringly and say "I bought Oreos.", a reminder of the last time they used that phrase.

G: Remember that ol'sweater that was once 'taken' and now returned all those times ago? Welp, imagine G walking into the bedroom to find MC wearing it. And only it, with the end of the sweater just above the mid-thigh (or somewhere close to it, given the possible height difference). All the while, MC is sitting there with a little grin, like a cat that ate the canary.

Kara: Not only did she help with starting up the business, she even saved MC's ass by providing them one of the shirts for the mishap. So imagine that shirt popping up again, this time on MC - with a collar that says 'Kara's' too, just to 'remember naming' this time. (I wish I can think up better, I am so sorry for the Kara-mancers out there (；′⌒`)

M: Ah yes, the writer. The one who gave you a signed copy of their book! Then MC comes up to M, asking if they could read them a 'bedtime story'. For some compelling reason, M allows it - and turns out, MC ends up reading the book in a sultry tone, maybe even close to M's ears if they allow it.

Isaac: (Honestly, I don't have much interaction with them). But maybe MC ends up in a delivery uniform, carrying a surprise gift as the delivery package for Isaac? Could be something sweet or something spicy, either way, it's something to set a mood. (Again, I'm sorry to all I-mancers /(ㄒoㄒ)/~~ )

Ardent: The walking 'wall' himself. Obviously, the easy thing to do is probs Ardent walking into MC naked with no more than pieces of cake on them - but for the sake of preventing ants on the bed, it could be something else. Maybe MC surprised Ardent with a cake, a similar one to when they first met...Except the words on the cake is probs something teasing, like 'Happy Birthday, old man', 'Happy Anniversary, Balloon Man' or even 'Worth 30 Minutes?'. (And yes, MC did wait in line for 30 or more mins for this cake).

SO, WHAT WOULD EACH OF THE ROS DO WITH THEIR RESPECTIVE SCENARIO (AND I AM SO SORRY THAT THIS IS LONG ASF ಥ_ಥ)

The sins are there!!! (how could I forget the oreo...) (some of these are short some long but all below the cut!

❤️ Cam - First he would think oh yay Oreos...until it clicks in his head about the last time MC said they bought Oreos. His pale cheeks will blossom with color in an instant. Ruby red. He knows MC is doing it to tease him, and two can play this game. Cam would walk over, taking the Oreo from their hand and simply say, "I guess you couldn't wait, huh? You know I have a much better filling if you're so hungry." (sometimes he's just too ballsy)

💙 G - They nod their head, blowing a breath between their lips that have pulled into a grin. "I fucking knew it." They knew MC took it, just like they kept something of MC's. G pops their hip out, hand held out waiting for what's rightfully theirs. "Give it." When MC doesn't budge G will walk over ready to take it off. Of course, MC will gladly let them try, intent on using the sleeves to keep G in place later.

💚 Kara - (that's actually super cute.) "What's this?" Kara runs a finger along the collar, leaning into MC's personal space. "Mine." She giggles pressing her lips against the collar and leaving a print of her lipstick behind.

"I honestly hope you forget more often, who knows where I can kiss next."

💛 M - "With a feather-light touch, his lips ghost along her spine. Her breath hitching as he goes lower."

M gulps loudly, hands pulling their blanket to the top of their cheeks. Their eyes are shut tight, and their breathing heavy. "Wh-why did you choose this book?" They stammer out, their brow pinched together.

You lean closer, blowing a stray hair from their forehead causing their eyes to open and stare at you.

"Do you not like it?" You ask, your voice low and inviting. Your lips pull into a slow teasing smile causing M's eyes to fall on your lips.

They nod fervently, using a hand to cover their eyes. "I-I..fuck."

"I'll stop here then."

Before you can close the page, M reaches forward grabbing your hand. They don't dare meet your gaze; instead, they focus on your legs, which are brushing against the side of their bed. "Not yet."

💜 Isaac - You knock rapidly on the door, listening closely as Isaac comes to open it. "Listen I don't have an- Oh." They catch on your appearance, shorts yanked high showing off your thighs.

"I need your signature." You motion to the pen in your hand, cocking your hip out as Isaac leans against the door frame.

"Is that so? What's the package?" He asks, quirking a brow as he glides his hand along your own and plucks the pen from your hand.

Once you see the pen is firmly in his grasp you turn, allowing him to read the writing on the back of your shorts.

Isaac chuckles, pulling at the bottom hem so the writing is easier to read. He grabs your arm pulling you against him, allowing his arms to wrap around your waist. "I don't need to write my name on your butt to know your mine. You decided that when you chose to stay."

🖤 Ardent - "You be good, alright? I have your cat nip toys and treats. You just, I don't know don't come clawing his back when he gets here." Cupid stares blankly at you as you set the cake on the bed.

She meows nuzzling your hand as you go to pick her up, "I promise I'll play with you when he's feeling better, okay?" Cupid flicks her tail at your hand and makes her way out of the bedroom.

The door opens not long after and you decide to get comfortable, leaning back into the pillows allowing Ardent's t-shirt to hang from your frame. Once he gets closer you light the candle on top. Grinning at the writing, "Worth 30 minutes?"

The door is pushed fully open and there he stands, his hair half up and his brow raised in question. "You didn't." He says motioning to the cake on the bed. A lone strand of wax runs down the candle.

You lean over, allowing the shirt to gape and show Ardent your chest as you pull the candle out of the cake and use your hand to wipe the wax off it. You then use your tongue to lick off the icing that clings to the bottom of the candle. "I did."

His eyes darken watching you, yanking the tie out of his hair and pulling off his shirt. "What's the occasion?" He asks as he goes to sit on the bed near you, taking the candle from your hands. His rough hands stroke your cheek lovingly, as his thumb moves to swipe the icing along your lip.

"What is it too soon to get you a cake reminding you of how we met?"

Ardent groans, his hand rubbing along his face as he looks down to read the red writing. "I'd say you're worth more than thirty minutes."

"How much?"

"What?"

"How much am I worth to you?"

Ardent leans forward, his hand cradling the back of your neck as he rubs his nose against yours, his lip pressing softly into your own. "Everything I have and more."

[spinningwebsandtales]

Imagine Going To A Pumpkin Patch With All Might

Yagi "All Might" Toshinori X FemReader

Rating: G

Warnings: None it's all fluff

Word Count: 2.1k

(A/N:) I had a lot of fun writing this if y'all couldn't tell by the word count. XD Slowly but surely I'm breaking down the writer's block wall so keep being patient as I try to write all my Halloween ideas and not make them crappy! Until next time happy reading! ~Countess

The hallways of the college were decorated for Halloween and excitement could be felt through the whole building as students discussed plans and costumes. While Halloween was one of your favorite holidays you were not as excited this year as you didn't know if you were going to get to spend time with your boyfriend. Dating All-Might, Japan's most anticipated hero, had it's difficulties. Not just from the fact that he was an exchange student but he had become super popular, not just at school but the surrounding area. He had a heart to help anyone and everyone. It's one of the main reasons you liked him as well, but sometimes you wish that you both could spend more time together. You sighed and readjusted your books, when said books were scooped from your arms.

"You need to invest in a book bag," a deep voice spoke.

You laughed, "Why would a I purchase one when I have you around?"

"I guess that's one of the reasons why I am here," All Might agreed while wrapping your shoulders in one gigantic arm. "Thinking about anything in particular?"

"Just Halloween. It's coming up quickly and I honestly don't know what I want to do. It's looking like I'll be staying in and watching scary movies."

"You don't want to do something together?"

"It's not that I don't want to with you, but you are always so busy and need I remind you that you are pretty far behind in your studies," you elbowed him in the ribs.

"You and Dave keep reminding me about my school work," All Might grinned sheepishly.

"That's because failing grades are scary Toshi. It is Halloween but that's no excuse."

"Think the teachers will give me a break if I tell them I'm tardy all the time because I'm doing hero work," he sounded hopeful.

While you knew some teachers understood, you could think of at least two or three who more than likely sold their kind hearts for a strong cup of coffee.

"It's not looking good for you," you finally replied causing the giant of a man to groan.

"That's besides the point. We'll spend Halloween together no matter what happens," Toshinori straightened up lifting you up with one arm while the other still held your books. You laughed slapping at his arm.

"Even if someone needs the great All Might," you asked and he deflated. "I'm teasing. You wouldn't be you if you didn't drop everything to go help someone."

You brushed dust from his cherry blossom jacket and picked a few specks of debris from his golden hair.

"Want to go and do something together today," All Might set you back down.

"Let's make a deal. You do really good in your classes today and we'll go to the pumpkin patch once we're done. I've been wanting a couple pumpkins to carve and I heard they have all sorts of fun things to do and delicious treats. It's a little bit of a drive but I think it'll be really fun."

"Sounds like fun let's go. But we aren't driving I can get us there much faster!"

"I thought you couldn't fly," you glared thinking that he lied to you when you first met him.

All Might raised his hands in surrender, "I can't but I can jump really high and really far really fast."

"Do you want me to get whiplash?"

"You'll be safe I promise," he flexed and you couldn't help but laugh.

"Okay I trust you. It'll save me some money in gas anyway and I'll get a big bag that you can carry so we can bring everything we buy back to the dorms."

All Might walked with you until you both arrived at the door of your first class. He handed back your books and leaned down enough to where you could kiss his cheek and he returned one on your forehead.

"See you after school," you whispered already missing him as he turned around.

"It's a date," he waved his broad shoulders seeming to hold up the hallway alone. You worried one day those shoulders would carry too much of a load and break him down.

Class always seemed like it went by really fast but since you had plans that you were excited for, the day dragged along and you were beginning to get antsy. Impatiently you were the first out of the door and headed straight to your dorm to find a bag for All Might to carry the pumpkins back. You eventually had to borrow one but you found a smaller backpack for yourself so he wasn't the only one being treated like a pack mule. Racing through the halls and exiting out into the courtyard there stood the larger than life hero in training. He was doing squats and jumping in place, warming up for the journey.

"You made it," he grinned widely and you couldn't help but smile big in return.

"I did and I found a bag," you held up said bag. "It should be big enough for you to wear and have plenty of room for a couple of pumpkins. I also brought a bag for myself because it wouldn't be fair to you."

All Might scoffed, "Who's the boyfriend here?"

"Obviously not you," you retorted and he laughed loudly.

Shrugging on the bag he opened his arms waiting for you to come close. An autumn breeze brushed past you causing you to shiver.

"Hold on I need to go grab a hoodie."

Before you could race off All Might slipped off the bag and removed his plus ultra jacket before holding it out towards you. You started to protest but he plopped it onto your shoulders and waited for you to place your arms in the sleeves. Once you did he nodded in satisfaction and put the backpack back on. He waited again with his arms stretched wide and this time you stepped close. He scooped you up carefully, cradling you close to his warm chest. He gave you a gentle squeeze and brushed hair from your face before he braced his legs and jumped into the sky. You screamed taking handfuls of his shirt in your hands and clung to him tightly. Your hair whipping around in the wind, it felt like you both were floating before he started plummeting back to the earth. You screamed again, causing him to laugh. You could have punched him if you could release the death grip you had on his poor shirt.

"You didn't say this would be that scary," you screeched. "We keep falling and I'm pretty sure we just left my stomach on the ground back there!"

"It's fun! Open your eyes!"

"Absolutely not I may lose those too!"

"You won't I promise. I have everything in control okay."

You eased your eyes open but you didn't ease your grip. Holding on tightly you gazed at the sky you both were soaring through. The ground seemed so far away but the view was amazing. Birds passed by, squawking in annoyance at the man in their skies but you finally let loose laughing and screaming every time you both would fall back down towards the ground. True to his word All Might was in complete control. He never crashed down and he made it to the pumpkin patch gate in record time.

Placing you back onto solid ground, he held your arm until the jelly in your legs solidified. The elation and fear had you so wobbly it took a long time for your nerves and adrenaline to calm. Laughter came from children and adults of all ages inside the fenced in area. When you were finally ready All Might took your hand, lacing your fingers together and lead the way.

"I've never been to something like this before," he said while taking in all the sights.

"Never," you seemed surprised.

"Japan guy here. I came from a big city," he replied.

"Sorry I forgot," you flushed in embarrassment.

"It's okay. What do you want to do first?"

"Let's pick out pumpkins last, cause there's so much to do and with it being your first time let's explore everything," you pulled him towards a petting zoo.

With goats, bunnies, pigs, and animals of all shapes and sizes All Might got to pet all sorts of little animals. The rabbits were both your favorites as their ears reminded you both of All Might's hairstyle. A goat tried to eat his jacket he was letting you wear. But when a volunteer brought you both handfuls of food, the goat forgot about eating your clothing. After the petting zoo you saw a few games everyone was playing. All Might won first place in the strength game and fortunately asked for the smaller prize since you both would have to carry it back to the college. Next you spotted a corn maze and you both bet on who would make it out first. You were in the lead for the longest time until All Might jumped into the air and landed at the end startling a bunch of parents and children. It took thirty more minutes until you made your way out to see him standing there with a couple bottles of water and a smug grin.

"You totally cheated," you accused.

"I reworked the rules," he replied holding out a water bottle to you.

"Cheater cheater pumpkin eater," you taunted and he pulled the bottle away. "Okay okay I'm sorry!"

All Might chuckled giving you back the water bottle and kissed your cheek gently. His stomach rumbled and you decided it was time to get some delicious treats. It was starting to get late and it would take some time to make it back and the college did have a curfew for the students. Sipping on hot apple cider and munching on kettle corn you and All Might finally made it to the pumpkin patch. Orange gourds as far as the eye could see and you wanted the two most perfect pumpkins.

"Divide and conquer," you asked tossing your empty cup into the trash can.

All Might shook his head, "I rather us enjoy this together. We already made the corn maze into a game. We won't get to stay much longer."

"Hand in hand then."

He nodded. The sun was starting to wane as you both looked amongst the rows for the best pumpkins. All Might spotted one first and with a nod of approval from you he plucked it up and placed it into the bag on his back. Not much longer after him finding one, you were able to find one. Perfectly round and orange it would become a perfect jack-o-lantern. All Might took it from you once you picked it up from the ground and placed it in the bag with the other pumpkin. He didn't let you get far before taking your hand again. Making your way to the entrance you paid for the pumpkins and said goodbye to the volunteer.

All Might scooped you back up and instantly was back in the air. You weren't as scared this time, though you still clung to him tightly. The weightlessness feeling and the warmth of All Might was comforting. You gazed across the horizon as the sun set further. The sky transforming into an orange and lavender sky, you could smell the new season in the air. All Might gave you a light squeeze as he heard you sigh. You didn't want the day to end and as he landed on the campus lawn you wanted to go back in time immediately. You gave him back his jacket and turned to go back to the front doors when All Might spun you back around. He kissed you deeply there on the front lawn. His cheeks wind kissed and your hair tussled into knots it was perfect. You didn't know what had happened to him, to bring All Might to America but you were thankful he was there every day. You held on tightly, not wanting the kiss to end but eventually you had to pull away. He brushed a tangled lock away and gazed at you lovingly.

"I'll see you tomorrow," you asked.

"Tomorrow," he replied before kissing you again. "And the next day and after that and after that and forever after," he laughed still giving you gentle kisses.

"I'll hold you to that," you warned teasingly.

"Please do."

When you closed your dorm room door, you melted. Halloween had become one of your favorite holidays once again and you wanted to spend every single one of them with All Might.

[erinwantstowrite]

hi! hope your having a good day/night/timezone/etc.! u got any writing tips (like how to not lose motivation/use up as much of it as u can while u have it, any ways to get the words flowing/“get in the writing mood” that have worked for u) for any of ur fellow fic writers? (idk if this’s been asked b4 (it seems like a common question lmao), but if it has, ‘pologies, lolol ^^)

i have a few that i've been thinking up to try and post!!

remember that you aren't on a deadline to write, and to take the time you need. no one wants to read something you rushed, let alone do YOU want to read it. and it REALLY matters if you love what you're writing. you'll kill your motivation trying to keep up with something like that!! if you only had time to write 300 or you had a great day and wrote like 3000, you're doing great either way!!!

there's a lot to keep up with when you're writing, and you have to remember and understand all of it. if you're trying to write while you're tired/upset/etc, you'll likely end up with something you're not that proud of. (granted, art is art, and sometimes these emotions can create something beautiful or meaningful). take metal breaks so you can come back to your work with a fresh mind, and don't overexert yourself. you'll remember and understand more if you treat your writing time like you would when you're studying. sometimes i make flashcards to remember characters, places, events, etc.

sometimes i can get too analytical with my writing, or it starts to become flat? if that makes sense? meaning, like... i'm putting words on paper rather than delving into the story. too many "they felt this way" and not enough "Character A turns to face the man that had changed their entire life with the single shot of a bullet, careless to what damage he could have caused. It's haunting to see that the man is simply that: a man. Not a monster as they had imagined, laying awake at night and wondering what their father had seen in his final moments. He's just a man." what helps with this is putting myself into the shoes of a narrator, remembering that i am telling the story as if i already know what's happening (even if I don't know where I'm going with a scene yet). i imagine that my reader is right there next to me and i'm telling them the story in real time like we're sitting around a campfire telling ghost stories, or that i'm the quirky narrator of a book they just picked up.

During times where i'm losing inspiration or feel like i'm in a loop, i like to go back to my favorite medias and spend some time with them. i recently rewatched Gravity Falls, the Sea Beast, and the Adam Project, and it was a fun mental break that got me into the writing mood. i try to find similar media to what i'm writing at that time. if i want a scene focused on funny banter or a comedic effect, i read or watch comedy. if i want to write a scary scene, i'll watch a horror movie. etc etc. "studying" your favorite media and putting yourself into your fav writer's writing shoes is a great way to improve your own writing. think about why that joke was funny, what the set up was that made it that way, and if it would have been a different joke if another character said it (Gravity Falls is one of the best media you can use for this, but really, reading mysteries in general can help)

physical exercise, if you can. getting your blood flowing and treating your body well!! when i was in band, we used to do "body warm ups" set to music, and i still do them to this day. it gets me awake and alert while also letting me listen to fun music before i write

[nthspecialll]

You are literally the best rdr account ever fr, your rants are not biased at all and i love it. Because some ppl rly should drop their ranting bcs it's obvious that they are more talking about their imagination about that character than actual facts.

I am so glad you think so because I sometimes noticed that too. From time to time it feels like people have an idea of a character and try to make the game fit around that rather than actually make the game sculp the character. That sounded very messy so: They make the evidence try to fit the result they want rather than letting the evidence form the result. And to be honest I think that is a little... Well offensive to the developers?

I am a writer, I write books and if someone tried to discard part of a character I spent years making because they felt like it, I think I would get annoyed, I even get annoyed reading it. Like it is fine if it is just jokes ya know? Like "Kieran is just a baby" as a joke but also being able to see that there is so much more to him, that is fine, but if you just refuse to acknowledge that there is more... No.

Another thing is glorification, I do not like people glorifying characters, again not as a joke, I think it is like ignoring a whole part of the character, the "mean" part of the character. Take Javier, I love Javier, he has so many nice and sweet sides, but I also know he is an asshole in chapter 6, that said I know people are not assholes for no reason, I know Javier had a reason to act the way he did. Do I think him acting like an asshole is a-okay? No, but I also know that there is nuance to it.

I have also seen it the other way around, where people make a character worse than they are? Like especially the women of the game, but also Javier and Bill. Again, dismissing part of a character that someone has put sweat, tears and blood into is not okay.

Media literacy is also a massive thing in this game because it is a historically accurate game in so many ways, and again, people who intentionally dismissive it because "Oh I wouldn't do that" are blind to history, because of course you wouldn't, you grew up in modern days with modern ideals and you got internet to educate yourself outside of whatever ideals and things were put into your head by those immediately around you.

I always strive to get as much information about characters as I can, to show both sides and to find out why do characters do what they do even if I don't agree with it. I remember when I learned that Javier did in fact point his gun at John and I at first got annoyed but then I caught myself and was like "that is fucking stupid ignoring it, face it and find out why."

To clarify, I am not shitting on people making jokes about characters, I do it too, nor am I shitting on people who does not have all information (I am not telling them to go research everything and "oh they must know every small detail to even speak about this character"), I am not shitting on people who have different opinions on characters, I am shitting on the people who chose to ignore parts of characters because that fits their narritive.

These characters are wildly deep and complex, allow them to be, and I know some people are going to say "oh that is so dramatic" and maybe, but that is my opion and if you don't agree just scroll, I am not forcing you to be here.

If you read all that, thank you! Here is a pic of Javier because I love him:

[hannibalhasthetardisat221b]

Oh my gosh. Okay. This is what I stumbled upon when I was searching through the Internet.. John Constantine and Ruper Giles meeting eachother. This is such an interesting idea for a crossover. I NEED TO SEE THIS HAPPEN!

Y'all have no idea how much I thought about this interaction. How many eye rolls and sarcastic/snarky comments we would get from Giles as well as how many times Giles would take off his glasses in frustration (i bet it would be around 10 times in one day), and how many times Constantine would be sassy towards Giles and try to flirt with him (at least in the beginning of their meeting), and then it will all go down to them bickering about the use of dark magic, demons etc. British sassiness would intensify, sarcastic comments flying left and right, at the end Sunnydale will be destroyed by British snark 😆 (someone said that they might also hookup, so.. um... 👀) lol

But in all seriousness, I think Giles wouldn't trust Constantine in the beginning, maybe even would go as far as hating him, but perhaps with time he will change his mind about Constantine. Plus it also all depends on when they meet, like Giles from season 1 to 4 would definitely be sus about Constantine and probably will have disdain towards him (perhaps because Constantine would remind him of his younger self, of his Ripper days..). For Constantine it would be similar, he would find that Giles too proper, too by the books guy. So, yeah, they will definitely hate eachother. (I bet Constantine would still continue to "flirt" with Giles from time to time, though, at that point he would probably do it to just to annoy him..) Honestly, their arguments will be a pure delight to read about, but also seeing them teaming up would be so much fun. I can already imagine Constantine's reaction upon learning about Giles' past. My head is flooded with so many different ideas but I'm not a writer, or at least not a very good one :(

Someone please write this 🙏🏻 and if there is such a fic exists then can someone please send me the link to it.

Thank you for reading my small rant on this and have a good day 😅

p.s. I apologise for my english, it's not my first language. (sometimes being multilingual is a nightmare when I try to express my thoughts 😅)

[wings-of-ink]

Hello! I just wanted to say GC is soooo good! I've replayed it several times and every time I play I fall in love with the entire cast, they are all so interesting and adorable (especially Oswin if I could I would make him the biggest cup of hot chocolate and shower him with compliments) 🥹🥹🥹 The writing is also amazing! Your pacing is really good, every scene is always interesting and I never skip over paragraphs (which is a bad habit I tend to do when I'm bored while reading). I have started to get into writing and I was wondering if you have any tips you could share on plotting IF, pacing stories/scenes, making interesting characters, or anything else you want to share!

Hello dear! I am so glad you are liking GC so much! I too am guilty of skimming (mostly on re-reads, but sometimes my ADHD is like, go on - do a flip!). And Oswin would totally be down for some hot chocolate and compliments - ideal date material there.

I get a little teary eyed every time someone mentions that they like the writing. We are our own worst critics, so it just lights up my soul that my writing is enjoyable for you. I will try my best to give you some bits that have helped me, but no one formula works for everyone. The key is to find your formula, try things out and see what jives with your way of doing things.

Apologies, this ended up way longer than I anticipated, but I kept thinking of things that I wanted to include, lol.

What I would recommend for sure is to actually do some self-study on editing and not necessarily just writing. That helped me quite a bit. Originally, I was going to return to college for some sort of certificate or Associates in the editing/writing spectrum. But, I am in a situation that I cannot afford to pay for classes for (another) degree that I end up resenting, lol. So, I studied editing myself to see if I felt it was something I would like and would be capable of. I learned a lot and really enjoyed.

*I highly recommend "Intuitive Editing" by Tiffany Yates Martin, and "Self-Editing for Fiction Writers," Second Edition by Dave King, Renni Browne, Dave King.*

There's a lot out there to choose from though. Also, thriftbooks.com has helped me score very affordable copies when money was tight. I applied a lot of what I learned in those books as best I could, especially when it comes to pacing and cutting out those things that readers tend to skip. A key thing to take away from those books is how to write dialogue. I focus on dialogue a lot and I am always working to make it as good as I am able. And really, you can google this too, there's lots of articles about it.

With pacing, I'm not sure if I can put it as good of words as other books or articles can. You sort of need to just keep in mind of where you're going - push the plot forward always. But also remember that IFs take more space in this realm because of the different paths, especially if you have a romance element. IF readers want variety and they want to impact the story.

You can't get too lost in the details and descriptions all the time. If your setting is temporary - you don't need 6 passages about how the moss on the stones reminds your character of their emotional pathway in life. This is also a stylistic choice - I cannot write this way, but others are totally gifted to do so. For me, I like to let my reader make part of the setting - give them the framework and the important details, and their imagination fills in the blanks (but I will say there's a balance that, one I am still working on, lol). This helps move you along since your key points aren't broken up by paragraph upon paragraph of description.

As for planning & plotting, that part can be hard for me - ADHD, lol. I had no particular method for this, I just understand my limitations (attention and memory to name 2). GC started as a plot point in a note on my phone. It was really just the MC and their situation. From there, I just grew it out and kept thinking about it. I had a notebook that I brainstormed things in, from plot to characters and setting, I just jotted things down. I would recommend that before you start writing you know where you're going. You don't have to have everything plotted out bit by bit. You need your key moments, landmarks to hit on your journey through to where your ultimate destination is (or destinations if you want multiple outcomes).

Don't be reluctant to change things as you go. There are parts of GC that I thought for sure I'd have that ended up changing a lot or removed for the better. Be flexible, but if you have a specific scene in your head - write it - even if you don't know what comes before or after. If you use it that's great, if not - save it for later or for another story.

For characters, I don't know for sure, but I imagine everyone's approach is different. I don't even have a set method for this, some characters sort of spring to mind on their own. Sometimes, you may think of a personality you like or even a tragic backstory, and the character forms from there. I'd recommend keeping it a bit realistic - make them bad at things, give them a few defining characteristics/ticks/quirks, but remember that they can choose to act differently sometimes.

Something helpful to get to know your characters is to do profiles and such for them. There are lots of character templates out there that will ask you questions to help you flesh them out. One of my favorite things to do is to actually take a personality test or two from the point of view of my character - to see how would they answer these questions. The results you read can just help cement them as an actual person, and if you're not sure how they'd respond to something, you can consult these. I like to use https://www.16personalities.com/ just keep in mind that personality is not a set science at all, but reading up on them can really help you bring them to life.

For IFs specifically, I am still new to this. It is similar but different to writing a regular novel with set characters. Flexibility is key, but you have to remember you cannot appease every single reader even if you want to. When I write passages, I try to think of different ways things could go, or how different MCs might want to influence the situation. This can get daunting, so you sort of need to mitigate what is worth writing unique outcomes for (is the energy to do it and the impact worth it?).

Probably the biggest thing I would recommend for IF writing is to makes notes and track your stuff. For GC I have a document just for code and variables. I pre-write the code so I can copy and paste it and then fill in the unique text for whatever variable I'm on. I also keep separate documents that are "living" for each character, an overarching outline for the whole plot, reminders, editing notes - whatever I need. For me, it helps to do separate digital (searchable) documents, it just depends on your style of working.

Most of all, if you love writing, write. Find your voice. Try different things. Just do it. Don't fret about if it's been "done before" because, to an extent, everything really has - but no one has written your version of it. Write what you like, what you know. No one else is you.

Just a personal note from me - I got so caught up in being an "adult" with a college experience and jobs that left me withered like a husk, that I stopped doing what I loved for a long time. I have loved writing since I was a child. I wrote for fun with my best friend. I made stupid funny stories for my high school crew. I even did very bad comics for a while. It was just a downward spiral, and I hardly read or wrote anything for years. So, just keep at it. Even if you don't use what you write, it's good for the soul. Even if no one reads it, just do it for you.

I hope something in there is useful for you. Sorry if it's a lot, you let this dog off the leash and I got into literally everything (sorry I also piddled in the living room again). ^_^

[missmaywemeetagain]

Pink Scarf - Part 20 (Elvis/Austin!Elvis x Reader)

Character/Fandom: Elvis - Elvis (2022)

Requested: kinda

(Read more here--Pink Scarf Series Masterlist!)

Prompt: You are part of Elvis Presley's coveted inner circle, and the currently-disgruntled wife of one of the members of Elvis' famous entourage, the Memphis Mafia. After Elvis' dynamite first performance in Vegas, you find yourself in deep water when his magnetism finally gets to you after all these years.  [ Fem!Reader ]

TW: SEXXXXXXXX. Dom/sub stuff. Angst (as always). Fluff (finally)? Medication/drug use/overdose mentions. Dub con mentions(sort of?). Cussing. Infidelity. Historical inaccuracies in the Vegas timeline. Priscilla doesn't exist in this timeline.  

Rating: Explicit/Mature (NSFW, 18+, so minors Do NOT Interact)        ||     Word Count: 15.2k (CUZ Y'ALL DESERVE IT)

A/N:  🎶And now, the end is near/And so I face the final curtain🎶

Babies, we are at the end. I don't know what to say other than thank you all so very much, thank you for you patience, and I'm gonna miss the hell out of Reader and Elvis and their stupid, mutual pining asses. (I'm not crying, you are!) 😭 Oh, and I highly recommend listening to Without Love (I Have Nothing) (1969) before reading the middle section here. I've included the first takes to the final master version because the first takes are stripped down & give more of the intimate feel I was getting at, but the final master is excellent, so I wanted to give you listening options! It'll really give you an idea of what the moment feels and sounds like! (I'm such a nerd, I know. Also, only Elvis could nail a song like this in a few takes, lord have mercy.)

I will write a short Epilogue sometime soon, so stay tuned! Also, I am very seriously thinking about publishing a physical book of Pink Scarf (and a Kindle version, too) BUT ONLY IF people are wanting and willing to buy it! It would likely include new bonus chapters/material. Please let me know in the comments, asks, or DMs if this is something you want! Like I said, I don't wanna do it if no one wants it, so let me know!

I sincerely hope y'all will stick around for my next projects as I try to get my writing career off the ground. Y'all are the OG's and the best fans a girl could ask for! 💗

If you so desire, you should now have the ability to tip my blog or different chapters in the story! Some of you have been asking about this, and of course, no one is obligated to do so! If you do choose to tip, thank you so much! I've never had anyone want to pay for my work before, so this is a big step towards my romance novelist dreams. 💜

Finally, I am so FREAKIN' GRATEFUL for every single one of you babies, honeys, and lil' mamas supporting me out there, YOU ARE EXTRAORDINARY! I didn't in a million years expect this kind of support and response for Pink Scarf, and your reactions, reblogs, messages, asks, and comments you've given me have been a blessing beyond expression. You all are the best community a writer could ask for! Thank you so much for your support. I am loving getting to know y'all better! I love every single reaction and comment and ask, and I'm sorry if I don't get back to them all as soon as I'd like but know that I love you all and am so excited to be making new friends! And a big "Hey, Y'all!" to our friends from Elvis Twitter, Elvis Discord, and Elvis Instagram--I see and appreciate you coming over to join us! 👀💋

If you feel so moved, please let me know what you think or how you're feeling (or send me asks)! I think I put everyone on the taglist who requested it, but please let me know if there are any issues or if I missed anyone. There seem to be some issues with tagging that I can't seem to fix, so please know I'm not leaving you out intentionally! Also, if you comment on a previous part that you want to be tagged, I might not always see it, so feel free to message me if I miss you!

I imagined this with Elvis in mind, but Austin!Elvis works here, too, whatever floats your boat! 

Apologies in advance if there are any grammatical errors or TW that I didn't catch. 

(I did start cross-posting Pink Scarf to my AO3 account, as well as my NEW Wattpad account. so if you are so inclined, you can check it out/support me over there with kudos and votes and whatnot!)

Stop her, stop her, stop her…

The words echo in his head, but Elvis is frozen to the spot, watching your back as you walk out the door and possibly out of his life, feeling so raw he fears his heart might liquify and pour out of his mouth. The way you look so angry, more angry than he’s ever seen you, and so disappointed in him—it breaks his goddamn heart. Your vitriol paralyzes him, drying up the words that he can’t seem to tell you.

But he’s done it all for you, every stupid decision he made, he did in the name of love—and of keeping you safe and keeping you sane (you fuckin’ liar, you know that ain’t true, he lambasts himself).

“You screwed with our lives because you could. You and your fucking egomaniacal, insane, manipulative bullshit…” Your words cut like daggers into his skin. He wants those words to be utterly untrue, outright lies, but he knows—he knows—that you are not entirely off base.

And perhaps that’s been the problem all along: he doesn’t truly believe he deserves you. For all the reasons you spit at him and for the fact that he has ruined you in more ways than one.

But the one crucial thing you are dead wrong about is that he didn’t care, that he’d just fucked you and wanted to pretend it never happened. He may be many of the things you said—egotistical, manipulative, stupid for lying to you—but he loves you, more than he has ever been able to express.

If anything, he’s cared too much.

But you are convinced of the opposite and, stupidly, he didn’t tell you any different.

This is the thing that finally gets him moving. His heart thrums in his chest as he races out the door, desperate to catch up to you. He looks around frantically for you, barely processing the confused and pitied looks of the men around him and flies out the main door of the penthouse suite.

“Y/n!” he shouts, hoping he can salvage this because he needs you more than he needs air to breathe.

I love you, I love you, I love you! screams in his mind but not out of his mouth, for reasons he can’t entirely explain. He arrives in the hallway just in time to see the elevator doors close behind you.

He’s too late.

“Fuck!!” he screams, and without thinking turns and plunges his fist into the wall. Plaster and paint flake around the new divot and burning pain radiates up his arm.

He nearly collapses from the way his heart tears in two, the gravity of the situation hitting him all at once. He’s barely slept in days, what with taking care of you in the hospital, being wracked with worry, and then having to come back and give high quality performances as if life was normal. His heart is beating too fast and his limbs feel weak.

Suddenly, everything feels much too heavy.

His legs threaten to give way and he leans against the wall, furious at you for making him feel these things. But he is more furious at himself.

You didn’t even say you were sorry, you stupid fucker, a little voice berates him.

I have nothing to be sorry for, the stubborn part of him, the one driven by his ego, replies.

The inner voice laughs sardonically. You have everything to be sorry for.

“EP!” he hears Jerry’s alarmed voice from far away. But he’s beyond caring.

I’ve lost her, is all he can think as his vision blurs and narrows, After all this, I’ve still lost her.

Jerry rushes to his side, but the despair and fury within Elvis drives him back into the penthouse, causing destruction along the way. He barely registers tearing the rest of his room apart, only knowing that he needs some outlet, some release of these horrible feelings trapped inside of him. To purge himself of the fact that even with all he tried to do to prevent it, his worst fears had still come to pass. Distantly, he’s aware of the breaking glass and the ripping of fabric and the roaring sound coming from his mouth, but everything is unfocused and red in his mind.

Elvis does this until finally his body gives out and he collapses on the bed. As he comes back into himself, his heart is beating so hard and so fast that he’s actually a little afraid he will give himself a heart attack. Trying to steady his breathing, he looks up, and seeing himself in the mirror above the bed, he hardly recognizes the man lying there.

Self-pity descends rapidly. There’s no way she’ll ever love me after this. How could she?

Early in his life, he’d thought June had been his last hope of ever having a woman love him for who he truly is, stripped of fame, warts and all, but he’s long since realized that you are that woman. You are his last chance at having that kind of true love in his life. And now those dreams are dying right in front of him because of his own stupidity.

I’ll always be alone.

And with that thought, he closes his eyes and wishes he were anyone else but Elvis Presley.

*

The commotion outside his bedroom door has Elvis lifting his chin expectantly yet not hopefully. He’s spent the last three hours faking his way through his midnight show trying to push the horrified and angry look on your face out of his mind. Trying to forget that he let you walk out his door.

Needless to say, it wasn’t his best show, though bellowing out his feelings through the music was cathartic in its own way.

He’s not sure why he had frozen like he did. It certainly wasn’t like him to cow-tow in the midst of a fight, but he had promised himself in the hospital that he’d be gentler with you. Perhaps it was the shock of seeing you so completely furious. Maybe it was that you’d finally remembered what happened after so many years, unearthing his deepest, darkest secrets and mirroring them back to him in the worst of ways. Or maybe it was that so many of your words rang with truth, even though you’d misunderstood the core reasons behind his actions.

Either way, he feels like his heart was ripped out of his chest. Part of him yearns to do more self-destructive things, but instead he sits still on the edge of his giant bed, the one you should be in right now, trying to understand just how completely he managed to screw this up.

“Fuck you, Elvis Presley. It would’ve changed everything.”

Your words ring through his head again and again, like a broken record. What did you mean by that exactly? Because the crushed look on your face when you said it made it seem like you had feelings for him back then that if realized would’ve changed your relationship, and that sends a wave of heartache through him so strong that he feels like he might vomit.

“Jerry, I swear to God, if you don’t let me in there, you’ll be sleeping on the couch for the foreseeable future!” He hears Sandy’s voice through the door and closes his eyes, trying to prepare himself for what he thinks is coming.

The door bursts open and he opens his eyes to see Sandy storm in, Jerry looking incredibly apologetic and a bit mortified that he was unable (or unwilling) to stop his wife.

Elvis waves Jerry off. He knows he can’t stop the onslaught. Jerry raises his eyebrows in an, “Are you sure?” way, and Elvis sends him out with a look.

“You’re a fuckin’ idiot, Presley,” Sandy seethes, pointing at him once the door is closed behind her.

“Nice to see you, too, Sandra,” he responds wearily.

“Oh, don’t you ‘Sandra’ me,” she spits, then looks him over carefully, as if really seeing him. She surveys the disaster of the room, which he had completely torn to shreds after you left, then looks back at him. “You look like shit,” she adds matter-of-factly, almost as if she’s glad of it.

He can’t help shooting her a withering glare, but Sandy’s blood is up and does not falter under his gaze like most would.

“How is she?” he finally asks, dreading the answer.

“Well, let’s see…in the last three days her husband beat her up, her life imploded, and she just found out that her lover has been hiding some pretty crucial shit from her for over a decade. She sobbed for two hours straight and has been near catatonic since, so she’s just peachy, Elvis,” Sandy says sarcastically.

“Watch your tone, Sandra,” he warns, feeling his temper threaten.

“No, I don’t think I will, Elvis. Not when y/n is absolutely miserable and you are sitting up here doing nothing about it,” Sandy shoots back.

“This ain’t none of your business,” he says, vexed, standing and pointing a ring-clad finger at her. He likes Sandy, but he sure as hell doesn’t like her calling him out like this, not when he’s already been beating himself up about it.

Sandy laughs wickedly, “You made it my business the moment you let her tell me and started using me as cover for your lies.”

He can’t argue with that. Deflated, he runs his hand over his face. He is utterly miserable.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Sandy says, and this time, her voice is quieter, gentler. “How could you keep something like that a secret for this long?”

He doesn’t want to say and certainly doesn’t want to appear vulnerable, but the ache in him is so bad, he can’t hide it. And he knows for a fact Sandy won’t let this go. Finally, he relents.

“I-I-I was trying to protect her, to protect our friendship… I w-was terrified I’d hurt her, that I’d…taken her against her will, and I-I-I could barely live with myself. I couldn’t burden her with the enormity of what we’d done” he says.

“And what about pushing her and Jack together, all the interfering? How exactly does that line up, E?” Sandy asks pointedly.

Elvis clears his throat and looks down. That is not something he is proud of. He wants to say he didn’t mean for it to go that way, but it would be a lie.

“It wasn’t like that, not at first. By the time I realized how I really felt about her, Jack had already swooped in and asked her out. I had nothin’ to do with it,” he says defensively.

Sandy crosses her arms, not accepting that and waits for him to continue.

“Well, then…then I-I realized she’d be better off with a man who could give her the stability and the family she wanted. I couldn’t be there for her, not the way she deserved. My career was just takin’ off and I—well, hell, it didn’t even matter until that day at Graceland, and I was ready to throw it all out the window when I’d thought she felt the same way about me that I felt for her, but-but then she…the overdose, she didn’t even remember…How was I supposed to explain that to her, Sandra? How? How was I gonna look her in the eyes and tell her she came on to me and we made love on the floor and that it completely changed everything? Who was gonna believe that? You know as well as I that it would’ve ruined her!” he says, his heart pounding, voice quavering, and his blood up.

Sandy looks at him carefully. “You were afraid she didn’t feel the same way. And that she doesn’t now,” she states, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

His head snaps up to look at her, eyes wide and caught like a deer in headlights.

“I had to protect her. And I had to set her up so she’d always be taken care of. And if she was with Jack, I could do that for her, for them. They could be happy. I wanted them to be happy, I-I swear. I thought they’d be happy!” he yells, back off the rails, pacing the room like a caged tiger.“I-I-I could…w-w-well, if she wasn’t with me, at least with him I would always know she was okay, and I could see her and it wouldn’t be some random-ass man that I didn’t know or trust takin’ her away from me forever!”

Sandy stays quiet, her gaze intense and knowing, and just waits for him to continue.

“I-I-I needed her to still be in my life, Sandra. I didn’t know Jack would fall so deep into the hole that he’d throw everything away. I didn’t think he would ever, ever hurt her!”

The words of his confession ring out and then die. Silence sits heavy for a moment.

“Wow. I have to say, that’s some masterful denial there,” Sandy finally says harshly. “Did you really think it was gonna be good for their marriage to take him away for months at a time? To feed him women and drugs and then be like, ‘Ooops! I didn’t know! It’s not my fault!’? Really?” she adds cuttingly, but steadily.

She’s right and he knows it. And she’s pushing him to admit the one thing he’s not sure he can.

He wants to get angry. He wants to scream and throw her out for her audacity. Instead, he just feels a rock in the pit of his stomach, realizing the truth of what she’s getting at:

That he’d knowingly sabotaged your marriage and then, when it was really bad, he’d taken advantage of the situation.

“You need to own up to what you did and apologize, and then you need to tell her what you’re so afraid of, Elvis. I can’t emphasize enough how much she needs to know that you love her,” Sandy continues with conviction.

His mouth pops open and then closes again, wordlessly, at hearing his feelings shared out loud so easily when he’s been harboring them alone for so many years. “You didn’t see how angry she was with me, how betrayed she looked…There’s no way she feels how I do, not after this,” he shakes his head.

Sandy rolls her eyes and mutters something unintelligible under her breath. “Listen, I have a pretty good idea how pissed and betrayed she’s feeling. And I’m not gonna speak for her, but…” she worries her lip a little, “you two of you really need to talk about how you truly feel about each other. Without all the other shit in the way.”

Something in the way she says it gives him hope.

“You need to fix this, Elvis.”

“I-I-I don’t think I can,” he states, defeated.

“Oh, please. We both know you can do anything when you want it bad enough,” she smiles slyly.

Once again, she’s right. “Why are you helping me?” he asks.

“Because I love her, too, and she deserves to be happy. She deserves the best,” she says knowingly, “That and this mess has everyone on pins and needles. We all just wanna fucking relax.”

Maybe she’s right. Maybe he can salvage this. Just not right now. He is too exhausted and things feel too raw.

"Just...wait a little bit," Sandy adds carefully, as if reading his mind. “I think you both need a little breather.”

He nods.

“But don’t wait too long,” she says on her way out the door, her voice warning him of his worst fear: if he waits too long, he will lose her.

The door clicks shut behind her and silence falls once again. He glances at the bottles on the bedside table. As exhausted as he is, he’s still keyed up too much to sleep.

He doesn’t want to rely on the sleeping pills, in fact, he hadn’t needed them at all when you were in his bed, but his body craves them and he doesn’t have the wherewithal to resist at the moment. So, he pops a few down and waits for the drowsy effect to take hold of him.

When he closes his eyes, all he can see is you.

**

You are itching to play, yearning to feel the white and black ivories under your fingertips. It feels like it might be the only thing keeping you sane these past few days—this need to pour your entire heart into something beyond yourself.

Unfortunately for you, the only pianos you know of are in Elvis’ suite, on his stage, and in the rehearsal room. Two of those aren’t even options at this point. It’s bad enough that anywhere you go in the hotel, all you see is his visage, all you hear is his music feeding through the speakers. An ever-constant reminder of how stupid you are to have ever thought you’d be more to him than just a friend.

You can’t seem to escape him.

You are able, with little effort, to convince Sandy to talk Jerry into letting you into the rehearsal space. Both of them keep looking at you with kind yet sad eyes, as they’ve been witness to all your special humiliations these past few weeks. You suppose it’s good that you are not alone with this, but sometimes all you want is to scream bloody murder and get as far away as possible from Vegas, from Jack, from Elvis.

But you can’t go home, not right now. You learned that Elvis sent Jack back to Memphis to “get himself together” and that Red is his babysitter. But that means you can’t go back to Tennessee, not yet. You can’t face him with all this still up in the air.

So, you are stuck in the limbo that is Las Vegas. You have nothing of your own, no money, no way to get home even if you wanted to. You are exactly where you feared you would be: Alone and heartbroken and stuck.

You hadn’t counted on also being beat to hell, both physically and emotionally.

Which is why you are so desperate to get to a piano. It’s the only way you can get these awful feelings out of your system. You just need to lose yourself in music, in creating it.

But when Jerry lets you in to the large rehearsal space, you are not alone. Someone is already at the piano, their back to you, playing a mournful gospel-style ballad. Someone is already leaning into the keys and singing.

I awakened this morning, I was filled with despair All my dreams turned to ashes and gone, oh yeah

You frantically backpedal and look at Jerry in a panic, but he shakes his head only somewhat apologetically and will barely look you in the eyes as he closes the door, shutting you in with the very person you are trying to escape.

Damn him and Sandy both.

As I looked at my life it was barren and bare Without love I've had nothing at all

You lean your forehead against the door and close your eyes, not wanting to turn around and face him. Instead, you breathe shaking breaths and press your palms into the cool door in order

to not to let the intense waves of anger and sadness that are crashing over you drown you.

You’re not even sure that he knows you are here, his voice ricocheting and echoing throughout the large space. He sounds so consumed by the music that your presence may have gone unnoticed. You aren’t sure if you want him to know you are here or not, but either way, you are swept up into the music with him, your soul clamoring for any part of him despite your mind’s warnings.

Without love I've had nothing Without love I've had nothing at all I have conquered the world All but one thing did I have Without love I've had nothing at all

You don’t want to hear him, not at all (liar), but his melodic voice is hypnotizing, drawing you in with its rich baritone and crying tenor notes and possessed vibrato. And whatever headspace he is currently in has his voice sounding absolutely hauntingly beautiful. It makes you shiver. You are forced to listen, to hear the meaning behind the words.

Once I had a sweetheart who loved only me There was nothing, oh that she would not give, oh no

It's unfair, just how good his voice is at making you listen to it, more than just his words alone, making you hear his soul through the sound. You suppose that is his true talent: being able to pour emotion into a song in such a way that it transcends the music itself. With your eyes shut, it threads through your mind, simultaneously lulling you and making you want to weep. You know you are getting a window into his heart by listening, and it is telling you what you want to hear the most but are terrified to accept.

But I was blind to her goodness and I could not see That a heart without love cannot live

Oh god, oh god, oh god, your inner voice cries because you are suddenly and all at once bombarded with memories. His voice strips you bare, cutting through all the anger and fear and heartache, finally let yourself realize what your subconscious has been trying to tell you for a long time.

Echoes from both the near and distant past trigger inside your mind, your head aching with the residuals of the concussion. First, it’s your own voice, calling back to that moment on the lawn so many years ago, telling Elvis about how you knew Jack was the one: He’s there when I need him. He makes me feel special, like the only girl in the world. I know he’ll always take care of me. He is mine and I am his. Sometimes I almost feel like we were made for each other, ya’ know, like we were meant to be…

Without love I've had nothing Without love I've had nothing at all

Then, Elvis’ words flood your mind, flashing from one moment to the next:

“I just want you to be happy, baby. I wanna make you happy.”

“I take care of what’s mine.”

“You were made for me.”

“You belong here with me.”

“It’s meant to be…”

Your heart slams against your ribcage, making it hard to breathe. It’s like he’s been telling you all along, yet you’ve been too blinded by fear and guilt and the sheer impossibility of it all to truly see.

I have conquered the world All but one thing did I have Without love I've had nothing

 At all

The final phrase is nearly a wail in the most beautiful of ways, the last run falling away and leaving a hollow silence in the room.

The memories come quickly now, a barrage of feelings and images: A boy backstage nervous as hell and his smile as you made him laugh. His eyes searching yours oh-so-closely in a diner booth as you tried to get over Ted. His melancholy the night you got engaged. Dancing, no, clinging onto you at the wedding before his world changed completely, and then again that mournful Christmas he’d returned, when you swore that Elvis wanted you more than anything in the world.

It’s the same way he looked when you climbed into his lap and rode him that fateful, forgotten day at Graceland.

His words from the other day, the ones that felt so possessive and manipulative take on different meaning as the puzzle pieces finally click into place, one by one:

“You are all I’ve been able to concentrate on, ya know that? You’re all I fuckin’ think about. I want you. I want you to be with me. Be with me.”

“Baby, you have me, you’ll always have me. You’re mine, and I’m yours, and I’ll take care of you, no matter what happens.”

“Let me take care of you. Let me be your everything.”

“I thought I told you, honey—I always get what I want, and I think I’ve made it quite fuckin’ clear who I want.”

“I need you.”

You are nearly brought to your knees with overwhelm, breathing too fast as you cling to the wall, anything, to ground you.

Then, like a freight train, it finally hits you, finally clicks, the thing he’s still hiding from you.

You suddenly remember the blanket of Elvis’ warmth surrounding you as you turned cold, bleeding out in his arms. The way his crystalline blues were terrified and beautiful and pleading. He rocked you in his arms, begging you not to leave him.

“No, no, no! Oh, God, don’t—please don’t go…”

Your heart stops. And you finally remember.

“…I-I love you, y/n, please, I love you.”

He’s loved you all along.

All of his cagey behavior, his deceit, the manipulations, it wasn’t to mess with you. It wasn’t because he didn’t care. It was because he loves you.

Tears stream freely down your cheeks as you turn around to face him. And as always, he’s right there, right where you need him.

“I…I…” is all you can manage to eek out.

He grabs your tear-stained cheeks in his big hands, his azure eyes deep and soulful, looking at you imploringly, and he whispers, “I love you. I’m in love with you. I love you more than anything in this life. I think I loved you the moment you steamrolled me in the hallway at school.”

Shock courses through you at hearing the words come out of his mouth, right here, in the present. You let out a choked, tearful laugh. It cuts through the anger you still feel and banishes your heartache, letting a swell of warmth overtake you. Despite all your feelings for him, you hadn’t even let yourself truly hope that he could feel the same way about you that you do about him. And to learn he’d felt this way for so long without your knowing…it feels inconceivable.

“I-I-I…and I’m so sorry, y/n.”

Elvis Presley doesn’t apologize. He buys obscenely lavish gifts. He skirts around the subject and gets really nice with those puppy dog eyes, but he doesn’t apologize, so this in itself floors you.

“I-I-I shoulda told you…but I thought…,” he steels himself against the emotions that are so obviously plaguing him before continuing, “that I’d taken advantage of you when you weren’t yourself, that I’d hurt you. I couldn’t live with myself, y/n. The guilt was eatin’ me alive and goddamn if I was gonna subject you to that pain. And I figured God wanted me to take on that burden for you, that there had to be a reason you didn’t remember. You wouldn’t have to face your betrayal of Jack or your regret for bein’ with me. I thought I was protectin’ you, protectin’ us.” He stops there, voice trembling, eyes open and honest, and you know then that while it had been wrong of him to hide this from you, he had truly believed that he was doing what was best for you. As mad as you are, part of you hurts for him because he’d gone through it all alone.

“I knew I couldn’t give you what you deserved, so I went meddlin’ in your life in the selfish need t’keep ya close to me, t’have some part of you as mine,” he rambles, racing through the words, utterly focused on getting out what he needs to say.

“I just needed you in my life. And I-I-I need you now. I needja more than anythin’,” he keeps going, his voice still shaking and the pads of his thumbs caressing your cheeks before trailing down your neck and your arms. You can feel them shaking, too, a sweaty heat emanating from them as he grabs your hands in his. His eyes are stormy and grey and deep with emotion, pulling you in, forcing you to accept his words.

He takes a deep, steadying breath before continuing. “It w-was wrong of me to-to sabotage what you had with Jack. And then to swoop in when you were vulnerable—it’s unforgivable. And if ya can’t forgive me…well, I-I’m gonna hafta understand. But I-I-I hope you do, that you can. I know I ain’t always a good man, y/n. I try to be, but bein’ with me—well, you already know it ain’t easy, the way my life is…” he trails off.

Part of you wants to interrupt him, to shout your love for him to the heavens, but frankly, his words have you speechless. And you know by his demeanor that he needs to get this out.

Tears pool in his eyes as he struggles to go on. “I know it’s been hard on you, all this. And if you can forgive me, if you wanna be with me, I promise I’ll do better t’make this work for ya. You make me a better man, y/n. You keep me on the ground, and God knows I need that more than anythin’,” he chuckles a little at that before his face drops into something much more serious.

“Come back to me, y/n. Please, come back to me. I love you,” he whispers, eyes imploring you. He is so used to demanding, but this he begs of you.

You are outwardly quiet, though your blood rushes in your ears. You want more than anything to concede to him with these revelations, to fall haplessly into his arms, and any other woman might. Honestly, you would have, just a few days ago, but Elvis cannot erase the harm he caused you with these welcome words or soulful singing or puppy dog eyes. You cannot escape the feelings of betrayal that have permeated through you these past few days.

“Elvis, I…I want to trust you again. I really do,” you finally get out, “because…because I love you, too. I think I have for a long, long time.”

Saying the words aloud lifts a weight from your shoulders, making you feel almost lightheaded.  You were so scared to say them, to reveal this hidden part of you, and the way his face lights up in such a hopeful way, it almost makes you start crying again. He squeezes your hands so hard that it hurts. But you have more to say and can’t let this distract you.

“But my mind it—it made me forget. I don’t know exactly why or how. I think I was so afraid that I could never have you, that there was no way you’d ever in a million years have those kinds of feelings for me…I think I had to protect myself,” you explain.

An inner strength you didn’t know you had until this very moment allows you to keep going. You take a deep breath. “Elvis, I want to forgive you, and I want to be with you, I do. But I am exhausted. I am weary. And I am still angry at you, and at Jack, and at myself. I need a little time to figure out what my world is now, without the oppressiveness of Vegas pushing in on me.”

You look up at him, hoping he understands, hoping he is willing to give you what you so desperately need.

He blinks as if coming out of a trance, surprise and confusion and dismay playing out on his features so quickly. You know he expected something different from you, and as much as you want to give it to him immediately, you know you cannot.

“I need to leave Vegas, E. I need space. I want to forgive you, but I need to heal,” you say firmly, looking into his eyes, holding back the sob that wants to break through. You can only hope that he sees and hears the truth in you. “I can’t start a life with you like this, bruised and broken.”

He shakes his head, small at first and then in outright protest. “No, no, baby, please, I need you here. I love you,” he says with a mixture of frustration and pleading and hurt, grabbing your cheeks again.

Tears pool and fall freely now, but you stay resolute, grabbing his wrists. “No, right now you need to be Elvis Presley and finish this engagement strong. You need to show the world that you are back and to spread that joy of music and performing as only you can.”

“None of that matters, baby. No, I need to be with you. I’ll cancel the rest of the performances,” he says, leaning his forehead against yours, fighting you every step of the way.

“The hell you will, Elvis Aron Presley. That’s not what I want, not for me or for you,” you say fervently, pulling away to look at him, bringing your hands to his face this time. “You need this. Seeing you up there…you are more alive now than you’ve been in years. I know how much you love this and your fans—”

“I love you more,” he interrupts, and it both makes your heart soar and breaks it at the same time. You close your eyes briefly to center yourself before looking back at him.

“And I love you. But I need space, and you have to finish this. Once it’s done, once I’ve had time to heal and forgive, then you come back to me, you hear?” you say, unable to keep the emotion from your voice but keeping it resolute all the same.

You watch him struggle. You can see how young he looks all of a sudden and you know he’s afraid you’re abandoning him. You’re afraid, too, but if the two of you have made it this long, you can stand it a while longer. Ultimately, you know if you fall back into him now, you’ll always hold resentment and that will poison you both over time, and you can’t have that.

Elvis closes his eyes and nods once. “Okay,” he whispers, so quietly you can barely hear it. A lone tear streaks down his cheek.

“Okay,” you whisper back.

He kisses you then, so softly, so gently, that you can’t help but lean into it. The chaste kiss is mournful and longing and hopeful all at once. It’s a kiss that is laced with the possibility that it could be the last one. You desperately hope that isn’t true, but only time will tell.

When you both pull away, you can feel the tether between you, the one that has always been there, tighten.

“Will you go to Hillcrest?” he asks, raising his eyes to yours hopefully, but it is more an offer than a question. The house in Beverly Hills is his home away from home.

You consider this and realize, other than going home to your parents (who you don’t quite feel ready to face yet, either), it’s your only option. It’s also a concession that will keep you connected to him, and you are comfortable giving him that. With its gorgeous views and serene setting, it will be a perfect solace.

“Yes,” you respond, and he seems sated by that. “Thank you,” you add quietly, then before you can second guess yourself, you tear yourself gently from his grasp and walk out the door.

Graciously and swiftly, he has Jerry take care of all the arrangements. Sandy is set to join you, and once you are both packed and ready, Jerry takes you to the airport and sees you both off.

Before he leaves, Jerry stops you. “He wanted me to give you this,” he says quietly, then opens your hand and places something soft in it.

Surprised, you look down, and see the familiar pink silk scarf folded there. You haven’t seen it since Jack ripped it from your neck that horrible night. Your fingers close around it. The message is clear: The ball is in your court.

“Send it when you’re ready for him,” Jerry adds with a knowing look.

You nod. You put the scarf in your purse.

Elvis Presley loves me, you think as you sit on the plane, but that feels trite, knowing other women have been able to say the same at some point or another.

Elvis has loved me since we were teenagers. He’s in love with me and has been all this time.

Now that is something that sends a thrill right through you.

You reach into your purse and run the silk between your fingers.

When it’s time, I’ll know.

**

Four Weeks Later

The hot California morning sun beats down on the umbrella that shades you. You had been reading and wanted to get some fresh air, the cold of the air conditioning giving you a bit of a chill in your white sundress but you cannot help but close your eyes drowsily as the heat swallows you like a blanket.

The last month was restorative, to say the least. It had been such a relief to get out of the stifling cacophony of Vegas, and it had allowed your brain to rest and recover from your concussion. Your bruises healed, and Sandy was there to both listen and have a good time when you needed it. You talked and thought through all your memories, working to understand both your reasons and Elvis’ for the way things had gone for your entire relationship.

You hadn’t heard from Elvis, as he was taking your need for space seriously, but Elvis’ lawyer had visited a few times, drawing up divorce papers that surprisingly took you a few days to sign. Not because you didn’t want to, of course, but because you had to fully process all that had happened and what it all meant to you. Sandy sat through your crying and guilt and shame like a champ, supporting you wholeheartedly once you finally picked up the pen and signed away your destructive marriage.

Once the lawyer had called back a week later saying that Jack had signed the papers, you felt like a new woman. Like you could finally start anew. Part of you had expected more of a fight out of Jack, but you did not dwell on the reasons he might have signed so willingly.

Sandy had headed home to Memphis to join Jerry once the Vegas engagement and resulting celebrations were over. You sent the pink scarf with her, with instructions to give it to Elvis only once you called her to do so, once you were finally ready. She’d smirked and rolled her eyes but was happy to do it all the same.

“Whatever I can do to finally get you two idiots on the same page,” she’d said lovingly.

You’d called her last night.

You can’t help but feel nervous. Even though a month was certainly not the longest you two had gone without speaking, this time it felt poignant and heavy in another way entirely. Your thoughts ran away from you at times: What if he’s changed his mind? What if he met someone else in Vegas?

It was possible and even probable that he’d been with other women since you left. You know how he is, and a man like him is not liable to change overnight. But you’ve spent most of your relationship with other people, and he still loved you after all this time, so even if he had been with someone else, you doubted it meant anything at all.

Of course, it still sends a red heat of jealously through you all the same. You push the thought as far away as you can, swinging your legs off the lounge chair, puttering back inside.

The cool air hits you like a wall of ice, and you close the sliding glass door quickly, goosebumps raising on your skin.

“Y/n.”

The familiar drawling baritone freezes you in your tracks. As your eyes adjust to the darkness inside the house, his tall frame becomes apparent across the living room and goosebumps rise over your skin for an entirely different reason than the cool air.

He looks incredible, magnificent even, wearing a silky white button up, the buttons undone at the top to reveal his tan chest, a pair of perfectly tailored black pants flattering him in all the right ways. But most significantly, the pink and black scarf is draped around his neck.

“Elvis,” you whisper, your heart fluttering in your chest.

That tether that you’ve learned has always been subconsciously tying you two together yanks you towards him. Your book drops to the floor and your bare feet run for him before your brain can catch up to you.

He meets you halfway and you throw yourself into his open, waiting arms. Your lips crash together with fervor, thirsty for each other after such a long drought. Soft, sweet, pillowy lips drink you in as your heart races and he pulls you in tighter. His familiar scent and warmth engulf you in such a comforting way that it brings tears to your eyes.

When your kiss finally slows and you both come up for air, you whisper, “You came.”

“Of course, I came.” As if there was ever any doubt.

Elvis pulls you to the couch, cradling you in his lap as he showers you with gentle but intense kisses. The heat between you builds but unlike in Vegas, it is more patient—openly full of love and admiration.

“I missed you,” he says into your mouth, his statuesquely perfect nose nuzzling into yours.

“I missed you, too,” you admit with a smile.

“Good,” he smiles, that lip of his curling up almost shyly.

His lips find your cheek, then placing soft kisses over your nose and eyelids and your forehead, as if committing your bone structure to memory with his mouth. It is unhurried because, for once, you have all the time and privacy in the world. You sigh underneath the reverence of his kisses as they trail down your jaw.

“Baby,” you say, stopping him, “as much as I want to continue this, I have things I need to say before that happens.”

He gives you one last kiss before bringing his attention to you. His gorgeous azure eyes fix in on you in such a way that you feel overwhelmed. It’s amazing to you how, even after all these years, he still has the ability to completely render you speechless with his magnetism and beauty.

“Yes?” he says, steeling himself for what may or may not be coming.

You tear your gaze from him enough to refocus. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and I need you to know that I forgive you, for all of it. I forgive you, and more than anything, I love you. I want to be with you, though I know we need to figure out what that looks like. I mean, if that’s what you still want, of course,” you fumble, looking away, not wanting to make assumptions.

“Oh, it’s very much what I want, lil’ mama,” he purrs happily and seductively, using his pointer finger under your chin to turn your head, bringing his lips once more to yours. Fire blooms in your chest and radiates down into your belly as his tongue dips into your mouth. “I love you. I want you to be with me. Always have, baby.”

“I signed the divorce papers, and so did Jack,” you blurt out, needing to make sure he knows and understands.

Elvis chuckles, the low rumbling vibrating under your hand on his chest. “I know, Satnin,” he drawls, his bedroom eyes sharp underneath the haze of lust you see in them.

“Of course, you do,” you laugh, shaking your head, taking the moment to run your fingers through his coiffed dark hair.

He looks at you deeply, firmly but gently grabbing your chin in his hand. “Let me be your everything,” he whispers. It is somehow both a question and a command.

Your stomach drops, but not out of fear this time. No, it is a tingling anticipation that wafts over you and makes your breath catch. You run your finger over his lips, pulling down on that full bottom one.

“Yes,” you nod. You unfurl from his arms and stand, reaching for his hand.

Elvis looks up at you through those long, dark lashes with something between wonder and eagerness. You pull him off the couch wordlessly, his fingers intertwining with yours as you lead him through the house to the master bedroom.

When you finally arrive, you look up at him almost bashfully. “I was wondering if we could try something new?” you ask. You’d been thinking about this for weeks now, all the different ways you want him, but this one thing had stuck in your mind after all you’d been through.

His eyes sparkle almost gleefully with curiosity and lust. “What’re you thinkin’, baby?” he purrs.

You take a deep breath before speaking. You’re not sure if he’ll go for it, but you figure it won’t hurt to ask. “I want to be in charge,” you finally say, matter-of-factly.

His dazed look at your request quickly turns to interest as his brow furrows with consideration. He doesn’t mull long, however, much to your pleasure, before uttering, “Hmm, why not, baby? Let’s try it.” He smiles coyly before bringing you in for a long kiss.

Your heart begins to thump in your chest. You’ve never done this, and you bite your lip, knowing that you have to change your attitude for him to take you seriously. You draw on the strength you’ve gained over these past weeks and take a deep breath to steady yourself.

“On your knees,” you command.

Elvis looks at you with amused surprise at the order. “What?”

“Did I stutter?”

His left eyebrow shoots up so far you think it may try to escape his pretty face and his brilliant blues go wide.

“No, ma’am,” he says, his voice getting breathy and quiet. His eyes don’t leave yours as he slowly sinks, his knees finally touching the floor.

A thrill shoots through you seeing him like this, humbled before you. This man who commands and dominates every room he walks into, brought to his knees for you. You doubt anyone in his adult life has truly had him like this. You relish in the way it makes your heart race in your ribcage.

“Say it again,” you whisper. He seems to know what you mean.

“I love you,” he replies quietly, his eyes open and shining up at you. There is an innocent and boyish quality to them.

With everything that has happened, you have a renewed sense of purpose and confidence which makes you bold.

You lean down and grab his chin in your hand firmly, feeling the light scratch of dark stubble under your fingers.

“Show me,” you command.

He nods furiously in compliance, that look of innocence tempered by sparks of lust in the depths of his oceanic blues. He is more than willing and up for the challenge, and the look sends a shiver of anticipation through you so strong that you can already feel warmth gathering low in your belly. It’s been over a month now since you had him last and each day felt like torture.

Elvis runs his hands up the backs of your calves, caressing your bare legs and resting on the backs of your thighs, his eagerness and yearning evident in his speed. He wants you, too, and he is oh so used to getting what he wants that it gives you pleasure to stop him.

“Uh uh,” you tsk, grabbing his chin again, “you’re gonna take it nice and slow, baby boy, and then maybe, if you’re really good, then you’ll get what you want.” It comes out like a purr, dangerous but alluring, surprising even you. But the look on his face is worth it, the way he nearly crumbles when you call him baby boy, the way his pouty mouth falls open slightly, the way he squirms on his knees, itching to take you but following your lead instead.

“Now, are you gonna be a good boy and do what I tell you?” you coo with an edge of warning. You’ve never in your life have done anything like this before, and you hadn’t planned this, but the control, the power just comes naturally, his responses fueling you forward.

He nods again, unconsciously wetting his plump lips with the tip of his tongue.

“Use your words,” you order.

“Uh-um, y-yeah, yes, I-I-I promise…mama,” he stutters out, picking up your cues and nodding, eyes are wide and becoming more yielding as he begins to submit to you.

Something about the way he does it has that warmth surging in your belly yet again.

“Good,” you say, running your nails up and through his raven locks, scraping his scalp and making his eyes roll back at your touch. You pull back quickly, leaving him a little breathless.

“No hands. Use your mouth,” you order with a smirk.

You watch his Adam’s apple bob with a gulp. “Yes, ma’am,” he replies, faster this time. He’s adapting quickly to your game, and the way he bows down to your feet, kissing the bare skin so softly as he makes his way slowly up your ankle to your calf has a thrill shivering through you. His pillowy lips and the tip of his tongue brush and lick their way up your legs, as he alternates one to the other. The sensation, especially after being deprived of his touch for so long, has you sighing softly, and his eyes roll up to yours, framed deliciously by those impossibly long and dark lashes. The blue of them has darkened with lust, but they remain compliant and eager to please.

That alone has the coil in your belly rapidly tightening, and you feel wetness begin to seep into your panties the closer his mouth comes to the place you want him the most.

Your breathing speeds up with this teasing when he meanders under your dress, peppering kisses along your panty line until his hot breath ghosts over the thin cotton of your panties. It puffs over your clit, and you pull your dress up with one hand to watch. His hands fly up to your ass of their own accord, squeezing and clutching at your panties to bring them down.

Using your other hand, you fist it tightly in his hair, yanking his head back and forcing him to look at you. “What did I say about hands, baby boy? I thought you were gonna be good for mama,” you tsk, shaking your head.

It’s a test. You relish in watching him quell the dominant urges he’s having by biting back a smirk of insolence, his lip sandwiched between his teeth so hard he could break the skin. The fire in his eyes almost dares you until he sees the serious look in your own and you tighten your grip in his hair. He winces a little and you watch him consider his options. You don’t let up during this battle of wills, unyielding and unbreaking of the eye contact that might usually level you.

No, after the last six weeks, this time you are going to get what you want.

Finally, he gets it, letting his arms drop to his sides. His face smooths, that innocence returning, and he submits completely to you.

“Good boy,” you breathe, releasing the grip on his hair and running your thumb over his lush bottom lip. His mouth opens and you push your thumb in, scraping at his teeth, then pushing into the soft warmth of his pink tongue. A low moan escapes him as his eyelashes flutter, and you allow him to suck it in, rolling his tongue over your thumb. A pleasured hum escapes your lips at the sensual sensation, and you feel it tingle straight down into your pussy.

“Try again,” you say, looking down at him, pulling out your thumb. You pull up your dress once more.

“Yes, ma’am,” he whispers eagerly, and you see the wheels turning for a moment before he continues. This time, he sits on his hands before he kisses directly over your sensitive nub, wetting the fabric with his tongue before kissing upwards. Then, he snaps the elastic between his teeth and slowly but surely pulls your panties down your legs. Your slick is already evident in the fabric, leaving little trails down your thighs. Gravity takes hold once they reach your knees, and they drop to the floor.

“There’s my clever boy,” you praise him, stepping out of your underwear, running your thumb over his high cheekbone. This causes that signature crooked, boyish smile to spread across his features, reminding you just how incredibly beautiful he is.

And he’s all yours.

As he lathes his tongue back up your thighs, cleaning the slick from them on the way back up to your core, your body shudders with delight and you feel him smiling against your skin. Looking down you see it is not a smirk, but genuine pleasure at making you feel good, and that sends warmth through your chest in addition to the heat rapidly building in your core.

You cannot help the moan of pleasure that escapes you when he finally reaches the apex between your legs and flattens his tongue over your folds. He drags it slowly, deliberately, ending with little flicks on your clit. Heat rolls over you, setting every nerve aflame, and this time when you grab his hair, it is to pull him encouragingly closer into your wet curls.

“Yes, good boy, just like that,” you sigh breathlessly as he begins to shower your pussy with attention, going slowly as you requested. He is soft and persistent, swathing gently through your folds, parting your labia with his tongue before rolling back to your clit. Oh, lord, he is so very versed in this, you remember quickly, as he suckles and presses soft kisses to that most sensitive place.

Your eyes fall shut as you grip his head and shoulder for balance. You cannot help the keening and panting that begins to emanate through you as the coil in your pelvis tightens. Even after only a short amount of time together, he somehow knows exactly how to play you for the most pleasure.

In a daze, your eyes open and you look down at him, his dark hair messy from your hands. That’s when you notice it: he is not touching you with his hands, as promised, but you see how he’s somehow undone his trousers without your knowing. You watch silently for a moment as one of his ring clad hands fondles and tugs at his cock, and it sends a thrill of arousal through you to catch a glimpse of him pleasuring himself like this when he doesn’t know you’re watching. Battling the swell of ecstasy that rockets through you, you curiously watch how his hand slides up and down over his length, pulling at the foreskin that mostly envelops his red tip, how his long thumb glides effortlessly over it, swirling the slick of precum around and over and down. It’s a well-practiced motion and it almost seems unconscious considering the way he is utterly focused on your pussy.

You gasp with pleasure as he massages your clit deftly with his tongue, and coupled with watching him jack off, you feel a desperation for more friction, more of him, building until you realize that it is you who is in control of this moment, not him. With a swell of need you push him back abruptly, his eyes bewildered, and lips shining with your arousal, hand still on his cock, wondering what he did wrong.

“Oh, what a naughty little boy you are. I didn’t say you could touch yourself. I didn’t say you could get yourself off, did I?” you say in a chastising tone.

And, oh god, the bashful look he gives you, dropping his cock, and how his cheeks redden at being caught as he looks down, those lashes fanning out, has you biting back a smile and more heat swelling under your dress.

“No, ma’am,” he says mournfully, shaking his head slightly. And then he’s blinking up at you with those deep blues, waiting for what you are going to do next, what his “punishment” might be, you realize.

“I guess I’m gonna need to teach you a lesson then,” you sigh with exasperation. But his disobeying you only serves to make you more aroused. You put your foot on his chest and push him down and backwards with a low growl. It’s like something primal has come over you, not only your need to dominate him, but also this flaming heat consuming your body and needing his mouth on you more definitively.

“Get on your back,” you demand.

Elvis scrambles backwards quickly and you are grateful for his flexibility as he easily untangles his legs from underneath him and falls back onto the thick shag carpeting. You step over him, sliding your dress up and over your head as you do so, leaving you in only your bra. When you look down, you see his blissed-out eyes wandering over your body with something akin to awe.

You lower yourself down to your knees, straddling his chest, which is already heaving from his arousal. He’s wearing the pink silk scarf, the one from your first night together, and it feels fitting, you think, as you lord over him and unravel it from around his neck. He watches you so intently in any other circumstance you might falter under his gaze, but while blown with lust, you can see by that bashful look in his eyes that he is committed to following your lead here.

“Hands above your head, baby boy,” you coo, running your hands up the underside of his arms, guiding them over his head. “Since you can’t seem to keep from doing naughty things with them, I’ll have to make you stop,” you admonish.

You sit fully on his chest then, feeling as the wetness of your cunt stains the front of his lovely silky shirt, and then you lean over, fully aware that it puts your breasts temptingly over his face. You hear him whimper, knowing he can’t touch you, and you smile as you use the black and pink scarf to tie his wrists together above his head.

You intertwine your fingers with his as you slowly pull back over his body, scooting your hips back as you go until your face is hovering just above his. He’s panting now, little puffs of breath coming from his lips as you ghost your own over his face. Tipping his chin up to try and capture a kiss, you pull back a bit.

“Nuh uh, baby boy. You have work to do first,” you shake your head, kissing the tip of his nose. Then you tempt him by flicking the tip of your tongue over the beautifully perfect cupid’s bow of his upper lip, and he fully whines and squirms under you.

You laugh at that, the fact that you are able to put him in this position, to make him want you enough to be vulnerable and needy like this. Then you become more serious, looking him in the eyes.

“Now use that wicked little mouth of yours to make me come,” you say in a low, sultry, daring tone. “And no touching unless I say so!”

“Y-y-yes, ma’am,” Elvis moans as you maneuver your body up and over his head, bracketing it in with your thighs. Your need for him is quite evident as you lower your already-soaking pussy onto his face and as his pouty mouth kisses your most sensitive areas, you know you are so wound already from this little game of yours that you fear you might come undone too soon.

You’ve never done this before and while part of you is a little worried about the mechanics and fears smothering him, that primal, instinctual part of you starts rocking your hips over his mouth.

“Oh!” you gasp quietly, unable and unwilling to contain the soft moans that his lips and tongue begin drawing out of you as you begin to ride his mouth. When he fully groans against you, the vibrations send a shockwave through your core, nearly snapping that coil inside you already. You steady yourself, finding a comfortable rhythm, and experimentally run your hands up your torso, using them to grope your breasts. You feel him moan again and look down to see him carefully watching you, his eyes blown black.

Sensing how it’s driving him wild, you lift your hips a little to give him air and reach down under the lace of your bra, using the pads of your fingers to lightly drag against the sensitive areola, taunting him and pinching your nipples to attention with a moan of your own.

“Fuckkkk,” he breathes out, the air tickling your labia.

“Language!” you hush him and plant back down on his face. His arms fight to come down and grab you, but between being tied and the way your weight is, he cannot, and groans against you again instead. He works you tirelessly now as you writhe over him and you feel that telltale tightening begin in earnest. You are nearly desperate as his tongue lathes against your folds again and again, dipping in and out of your hole, circling your clit and back again. He eats you expertly, willingly, and you ache for him.

“Good boy, there’s my good baby,” you pant quietly as your heart flutters and your breathing starts to hitch.

But when his tongue slips daringly lower, perhaps accidentally, perhaps not, you careen forward with a shocked gasp as it grazes your other hole.

“Elvis!” you gulp, clasping his hands with your own to steady yourself, stilling your hips. You aren’t quite sure how you feel about that slip yet, only knowing that it’s a place that has been forbidden before now. Your heart pounds so hard you hear the blood in your ears, your body on high alert.

“Hmmm?” is his only response before he tests you again, gently, letting his tongue circle that illicit spot lightly.

“Elvissss…” The moan escapes you before you can stop it because the unfamiliar feeling of his tongue there has your already aroused body teeming with the new sensation and you know you shouldn’t like it, you’re not supposed to like it…

“Yes? You like that mama?” he replies surprisingly bashful, submissively, compared to the sensual dominance that you are used to from him.

“I-I-I’m not sure, baby boy,” you finally stammer out honestly.

You feel him nod underneath you, as if understanding, and he goes back to suckle your clit, making you jump a little and roll your hips. And when his tongue travels back through your swollen folds and he goes a little farther to include that little secret spot, you can’t help but cry out in pleasure this time.

He smiles against you, and you respond by rolling harder on his face, effectively shutting him up. The carnality that flows through you banishes your prudishness and you let him kiss and eat you fully now, from hole to clit, letting the sensations consume you completely.

You fuck his face wildly. You don’t try to stop the keening noises crying from your lips, you just grip his hands for dear life as the coil inside you constricts, your body flooded with fire, desperate for the blast of release his talented mouth promises you. Frantic now, chasing that high, your body tenses over him and he groans loudly into your cunt, his tongue deep inside you, as your thighs squeeze his head.

The peak hits you incredibly hard and you cry out as you shatter above him. White stars flash behind your eyes followed by inky blackness. You can barely breathe for the way it hits you. He continues to lick and suck you through your orgasm, coaxing you, moaning into you in order to continue your pleasure for as long as possible. He devours every drop of your arousal. Shaking and shuddering and oversensitive, you finally scoot your hips back, allowing him to come up for air with his own gasp.

“Did I do good, mama?” he puffs, looking pleased, his face covered in your slick.

“You did perfect, baby boy,” you breathe out, kissing his cheeks, then his swollen lips, tasting your tangy sweetness there. Your body shivers with aftershocks as you come back into yourself, your mind concocting all the ways you want him tonight, all the ways in which you can show him your love and vice versa.

You look down at him, enjoying the sight of pussy-drunk lust on his boyish features, the vulnerability of his hands restrained above his head, the way his bedroom blues dreamily follow your gaze and your lead.

Your need for him feels insatiable. You want to wreck him, ruin him, in the best way possible. Biting your lip you roll your hips into his waist, feeling the cold of his belt sear into your bare core and Elvis’ eyes roll back a little as you drag your nails down over the part of his chest that is exposed above his shirt.

“You gonna continue to be good for mama, baby boy?” you lean down to coo in his ear, scootching your hips back just enough to feel the tip of his rock-hard length through his pants, and you can feel the shudder that ripples through him.

He nods furiously. “Y-yes, mama, oh yes, I’ll be good.”

“I’m so glad, baby,” you whisper, “Mama’s got somethin’ special in store for you.”

Elvis whimpers at that, and you can tell it is taking every ounce of self-control he has to keep from taking you right there and then, but he stays good and still and relatively quiet for you. You kiss down the shell of his ear, nibbling on the perfect lobe, and then you focus your attention on the divot just behind it where his jaw meets his skull. Lapping there for a minute, you take your time as he hums and tenses beneath you, turning his head the opposite direction to give you the access you want. You make your way agonizingly slowly down his neck, using your lips and teeth and tongue in all the ways you’ve learned he likes. By the time you reach his collarbone, he is practically writhing under you.

His breath is beginning to heave and become labored when you start down his tanned chest, the course hair there tickling your lips as you go. One by one, you pop the remaining buttons open, and with each, a pretty little huff escapes his pouting lips. Oh, how beautiful he looks with his cheeks all flushed and his hair mussed, those eyes alternating between peering down at you and looking up to the heavens.

Once again you move your hips back, this time hovering just above the erection raging in his pants. It’s enough that he can feel your heat, but you give him no friction whatsoever, and this is what finally has him bucking his hips up desperately, but you are prepared, dodging well out of the way before he finds any sort of relief.

“Now, now, that’s not how good boys behave,” you tsk at him, earning a huff in response. You use your nails to scratch down his now-exposed treasure trail, your lips following close behind and he fully whines by the time you reach the belt line.

“Please, please, mama,” he mewls at you, raising his head to look at you with begging eyes.

“All in good time,” you muse quietly, shooting him a soft smile.

You take your time with his heavy belt and zipper, causing him to spring forth, his cock hard and veiny, precum already oozing a sticky string between his tip and his abdomen, but you leave him there, untouched. Moving lower, you slowly, deftly, remove one shoe, then the other, doing the same with his socks. Then you pull his pants down his long legs, letting your fingers ghost over his sensitive skin. It’s torture, based on the way he squirms and sighs, and you find yourself full of emotions.

A small part of you relishes in making him squirm after finding out what he’d kept from you all these years, for all the time you may have lost with him because of his self-righteous ego. But a much larger part of you wants this with him, for him, because you know he’s likely not given himself to anyone like this. Not the great Elvis Presley, the man who strives for excellence and control in all things. You cannot imagine him letting just any woman bring him to his knees, tying him up, letting her have her way with him. At least you hope not.

But perhaps that is your own ego talking.

But a sense of unease, jealously perhaps, wafts over you, diminishing your confidence slightly.

“Baby boy?” you hum pensively at him, running your finger softly up the sole of his foot, causing him to jump and giggle a little.

“Yes, mama?” he responds softly, tilting his chin down to look at you.

You frown, worrying your lip a little, wanting to approach this skillfully as not to ruin the mood, but you have to know. Now that the thought is there, you must know.

“Have you ever let anyone else do this? Touch and tease you like this?” you ask, trying to keep your voice sultry and light, running your fingers up the underside of his arm, dragging across the pink silk that binds his wrists.

His brow furrows for a moment as he tries to interpret what’s going on underneath the bravado you’re showing, trying to glean your true meaning, and then his face softens and smooths with realization, his eyes wide and open for you. “Not like this, mama. Just for you. Only you,” he says genuinely, and you know it’s true, that he’s not just giving you lip service within the game you are playing.

“Good,” you nod, more moved by this than you want to show right now, your heart swelling with this new knowledge. You kiss him gently and softly on the lips. 

“Do you trust me?” you add more mischievously, your confidence returning.

“Completely,” he nods back.

“Then it’s time to get on the bed, baby boy,” you purr.

He brings his arms down in front of his abdomen, the scarf still taut at his wrists and his shirt open and flowing behind him, and you help him to standing. His eyes sparkle a little with what you think is anticipation. Once to the bed, he snakes his long, beautiful body backwards until he is lying up against the dark pillows.

Your mouth waters at the sight of him lying there, vulnerable and all yours. Getting between his legs, you start at his feet, massaging the ropey muscles with your hands, and alternately kissing your way over the arches, his ankles, and up his calves, up every perfect part of him. You pay attention closely to these spots you’ve never really explored before, listening and watching him carefully. When his breath catches, or he hisses in through his teeth, you know it’s extra sensitive, and of course, when his mouth falls open and his eyes roll back you know you’ve hit the jackpot.

You take your sweet time working up his muscled legs, bringing up and opening his knees to give you more access to what you are finding is the highly sensitive flesh of his inner thighs. Warmth rolls through you when you nip there, very close to his balls and he nearly jumps off the bed.

“Stay still and be good, baby boy,” you purr at him with a sly smile against his leg, and he whines in protest but stills himself. You think it’s high time you give him some well garnered attention to his large, heavy testicles. His musky scent fills your nostrils, setting your biological need for him on fire. You wiggle a little on your knees with anticipation but since you aren’t sure exactly what he likes or what his boundaries are yet, you want to make sure he has an out.

“Baby,” you say seriously, looking into his eyes, “if you really want me to stop, like really, I need you to tell me, okay? Say…” You stop, looking around for inspiration, something he would never say in the heat of the moment, and then your eyes land. Perfect.

“Say ‘pink scarf’ if you really want me to stop baby, okay?” you urge.

Elvis nods, looking excited and also a little concerned at the prospect of what you might do to him to require him to use such a phrase. “Pink scarf, got it,” he breathes.

With that, you feel better, and return your attentions down in between his legs. His cock is hard and buoyant against his pelvis, precum glistening the angry red tip that is peeking out from his lighter foreskin, but that is not what you’re going to focus on, not yet.

Using your thumbs, you apply gentle pressure to the insides of his thighs, massaging slow circles up, up, up, closer to his most sensitive areas. Lying on your stomach between his open legs, you test the waters by running your nails softly over the darkened, wrinkly skin of his ball sac.

He hisses in at that, his lower half tensing as you gently continue, using your thumb, pointer, and middle fingers to explore the area. In his arousal, his balls are pulled up tight to him, but it doesn’t detract from the fact they are still rather large compared to what you’re used to. His breathing becomes more labored as you roll his testes between your fingers, cupping them, then pulling gently.

His hips roll and wiggle. You love the effect you are having on him, the way he responds so readily under your touch, and you wonder if this is what it’s like for him when he plays with you. It sends heat of a different kind rolling through your body each time he jolts or gasps.

Which is exactly what he does when you nuzzle his sac with your nose before flattening your tongue against the seam and licking a long stripe from back to front. His hips rise off the mattress and running your hands over the crease of where his legs meet his torso, you push those famous narrow hips back down to the bed.

“Oh mama, oh mama,” he whispers quietly, almost like a begging prayer, as you continue lathing your tongue back and forth and up and down over his balls. He begins to writhe in earnest, despite your hands holding him, his legs pulling up and boxing you in.

“Be still,” you command, lifting your head, pushing his bent legs back open.

He obeys instantly, looking down at you with wild, shining eyes, nodding almost unconsciously in reply, as if preparing himself for whatever you deem to do next.

You use your hands again, one to push his legs up, tilting him towards you, the other rolling him like dice, before lifting his sac enough to lick the underside completely. Taking inspiration from his playbook, you then flick down over his taint, applying pressure with your tongue, his musky scent consuming you.

He moans long and loud at that, unable to contain himself as you shower this newly found spot with all your attention. As you lick and press and roll, he mewls and begins to shudder. Your heart beats faster against your ribcage at his reactions, how he pants above you, and you wonder what will happen if you press your thumb to that softer spot right above his puckered hole.

So you do. You press that spot over and over and watch him tremble and writhe until he looks damn well possessed.

“Please, oh please, oh GOD!” he cries out and eventually his entire body tenses, hips lifting as though he were coming inside you, and he shudders wildly before falling hard back onto the bed. Heart pounding, you lift your head to see a milky white leak from his tip. It’s not cum in the sense you are used to, but some sort of release nevertheless.

You’re not one hundred percent sure what just happened, but you are pleased you made him feel so good. You watch him lying there, gasping from pleasure, his hands clenching and releasing against their bonds, trying to recover from whatever that was. His face is flushed red, making the blue of his arousal-darkened eyes look almost preternatural, and tears leak, dampening his dark lashes. He looks positively bewildered.

“Good job, baby boy,” you praise him, kissing the inside of his knee.

“Wh-wh-what w-was that, mama?” he gasps, asking.

“That ever happen before?” you respond, curious, instead of answering him.

He shakes his head, his hair flopping as it lolls from side to side.

“Hmm…well, did it feel good, baby?” you ask because you aren’t entirely sure what happened, but you don’t let him know that. You don’t let him know about your own fresh arousal that’s leaking down the sides of your thighs or how your heart is fluttering in your throat at the sight of him such a mess before you. Not yet.

He nods furiously, eyes unfocused.

You smile at the blissed-out look on his face. You crawl up him to give his open lips a little kiss. “Mama’s not done with you yet, baby boy,” you whisper against his lips before pulling back.

His dreamy eyes go wide, but you don’t dwell, instead making haste to kiss down his chest once more, stopping to tongue and scrape his nipples with your teeth, making him jump underneath you once again. You kiss down the flat planes of his belly, detouring to give a little attention to his bound hands, sucking a digit or two into your mouth on the way down.

He fully shivers at that, moaning, sending a thrill of your own down to your toes. His belly is already heaving again with anticipation as you arrive at your next destination. His length bounces as his stomach moves, the milky white having leaked onto his belly, but whatever release he’d had did not affect the hardness of his cock, much to your pleasure.

Your goal here is to worship and tease, rather than the ways you’d had him in your mouth before. The way he’d fucked down into your throat both gently and harshly prior to this was not going to be his experience this time. No, this time is all about giving him a night he’s unlikely to ever forget. It is about claiming him as your own while showering him with love and attention on your terms. You’ve never had that before, not truly, and oh how sweet you are finding it already…

First, all you do is hover over his cock, so closely that he can feel your hot breath against him as you run your open mouth up and down his shaft. He squirms his hips from left to right, his hands fisting, and you can sense how it is taking everything in him not to buck up into you.

“Mamaaaa…need y-you,” he begs.

This makes you smirk coyly.

“Hush, baby,” you admonish him with a furrowed brow, stilling his hips again with your hands. “Be a patient good boy and you’ll get what you need.” Eventually…you think smugly.

He can only manage a whimper in response.

Finally, you place soft, barely there kisses up his shaft, feeling his rapid pulse through the throbbing veins. His foreskin awaits and you kiss gently around it, and it must be very sensitive because he’s fully gasping now, quiet “uh, uh, uhs” escaping his lips. Using only your tongue, you dip it into and under the foreskin, swirling it around the head.

“Oh, oh, no, t-too much, too much, mama!” he half moans-half cries, nearly levitating off the bed, but you don’t stop, instead sucking the tip of him into your mouth and soothing the head with your tongue.

You look up at the man you are in love with, in all his messy ecstasy, as tears stream down the sides of his pretty face, but he does not say the words, only sighing at this little bit of relief you give him. So, you continue, after this moment of reprieve, sending your tongue up and down his shaft, then kissing and tonguing his sensitive tip as though it were a dripping ice cream cone on a hot summer day.

“Please, please, please,” Elvis pants out of that wonderous and full mouth of his. By the time you use your hand to fondle his balls again, he is so fully enraptured, staring up into the mirrors above you, that you’re not sure he’s even on the same plane as you anymore.

God, it has you nearly coming undone yourself to see him like this, bringing him closer and closer to the edge without letting him fall over. You find yourself pressing your thighs together, desperate for your own friction.

His gorgeous eyes flutter down to you as you once again tongue his tip. “B-bein’ good, m-mama, please, needju,” he whimpers, his words slurring together.

“Bein’ so good, baby boy,” you praise him, then you take him fully into your mouth, pumping once, twice, and then you feel his entire body tense and shake.

“F-f-fuuuuckkk,” he groans gutturally, his hips bucking into your throat, coming completely undone nearly instantly. His eyes roll back into his head, beads of sweat mixing with the tears down his face, and the prominent vein in his neck pulses in time with his salty, thick release. It coats your tongue, and you swallow him down readily before gently lathing your tongue over the tip of his sex. He squirms under you, rocked and hypersensitive as you pop off him.

“Thank you, mama,” he whispers, looking so relieved and sex drunk that you are beside yourself now. Every nerve ending inside you is on fire. Before he can soften, you climb onto his lap, lining him up with your entrance and sliding him through your soaking folds and into your heat.

Elvis’ eyes widen in shock and he wiggles his hips down into the mattress as if trying to escape. little “ah ah ah!” puffs come from his lips, like he’s handling a hot potato.

“M-mama, ah, ah! I-I-I can’t,” he shakes his head before slamming it back onto the bed.

“Oh, you can, baby boy, you can, I promise,” you say breathlessly, relishing the feel of him filling you, even though he’s beginning to soften slightly. You roll your hips in his lap. “You’re gonna keep being such a good boy and make me come, right, baby?” you encourage demurely, hooking enough into his ego and his need to please you to keep him going.

All you know is that you need him, need to keep him inside you, to have him fill you up, even if you have to wait.

The noise that comes from him is somewhere between a groan and a growl, his eyes screwing shut for a moment as he tries to compose himself enough to continue. You still, placing your hands on his chest, and wait for his response.

“How about this? You’ve been so good for mama. I’m gonna take this scarf off you and you use those hands to show me some love while we wait,” you say.

That has him opening those glassy, pretty eyes of his and nodding.

“Mama’s gonna keep makin’ you feel real good, don’t you worry now, baby,” you tut at him, untying the knots at his wrists. The silk yields easily. You lean forward on top of his chest and throw it around his neck.

Elvis rolls his wrists a few times then wraps his arms around your back, holding you fast to him while he continues to breathe heavily. The feeling of being draped on him and held in his long arms sends an almost wholesome warmth through your body. Oh, how you missed being close to him like this. It’s almost as if you didn’t know it until this very second, that string that has been pulling you two together for so long finally loosening as you fall unencumbered into each other’s arms.

After a long moment, he calms and his hands start roaming slowly over your back. You can feel the cool of his rings against your fiery skin and it sends shivers through you. You feel starved for him, hence your desperate need to have him inside you and to show him with every fiber of your being that you will be all he ever needs from here on out.

You hum softly, pleased, when his hands find your ass, your hips, and you swivel them. He is soft inside you for the moment, at least, and you feel the sharp intake of breath at your movements, his hands gripping you to keep you still.

Still sensitive, you think.

His hands flutter up and down your sides then, softly enough to make you want more. You can hear his heart pounding in his chest, the rhythm beginning to match yours the longer you stay intertwined. This is what you’ve been missing, needing, all along. Him vulnerable and sated under you. Knowing that you are the only one he truly wants. Knowing that it’s been that way for almost as long as you’ve known him.

“Say it again,” you whisper into his neck, kissing his pulse points.

It only takes him a moment to understand what you are asking.

“I love you,” he whispers.

“Mmmm,” you hum, kissing your way up his strong, angular jaw to his lips. “Again.”

“I love you.” It rumbles in his chest so you can feel it vibrate into yours.

Each time he says it, it dances through you, lighting up all the dark spaces that were so afraid and convinced he would never feel the same.

You kiss his lips, softly at first, then deepening as your own love pours out of you and into him.

His hands are everywhere now, one tangling in your hair, the other snapping the clasp of your bra undone. Your mouths separate just long enough for you to rip off the lace and fling it to the side. The feel of his bare chest against yours makes you feel like you are melting into him. Your mouths are unhurried but intense, tongues exploring, devouring each other whole.

“I love you,” you say into his mouth, voice hushed and reverent.

He pauses for a moment, pulling back just enough for you to get lost in the oceanic depths of his eyes as they gaze at you adoringly, as if memorizing your features. “I’m yours,” he says. Then he pulls you back down to him, his mouth consuming you once more.

You’re not sure how long you lay there, kissing, touching, exploring each other as if it were the first time, but it is long enough that you feel him begin to stiffen inside of you once more, just as you knew he would. Slowly, you begin to rock on top of him, your hands and lips tracing his Apollo-like features. Your fingers rake through his raven hair, damp with sweat from the exertion.

Elvis’ hands cup your face, your neck, tangling through your hair, caressing your breasts. He touches you reverently, though as your passions increase, his hands light streams of fire over your skin wherever they deem to touch. A heated coil tightens again in your belly, more gradually this time, but deep all the same.

The room is quiet, save for the heavy breathing that has synced between the two of you, a hushed feeling that matches the intensity of your lovemaking. His deep gaze threatens to consume you from below as you ride him, and every cell in your body is being called to his.

He fills you in ways no one ever has and as no one ever could. Perhaps he was made just for you, you think, with how perfectly you align. You realize that this is the first time you’ve had him with all your memories intact. Every moment the two of you have had since the beginning now swells between you, a now shared history that makes this moment all the more poignant.

You are lost in the depths of him just as much as he is lost in you. You can see it now, so obviously, and you wonder how you spend so very long without him. Beyond his talent, beyond his gorgeousness, lies that both human yet ethereal man, and he is wonderful and he is flawed, and he is finally yours.

He expertly touches your sensitive bud, sending you careening towards the edge of an abyss that once frightened you. Because of course this was never just about sex, though your brain tried to trick you, making you forget that your love for him started so very long ago. But what terrified you six weeks ago now feels ripe with possibility. What made you feel trapped has now been set free. And as that coil snaps and you fracture above him, it allows your true self to emerge for the first time in a very long time.

“I love you, Elvis,” you breathe, locking eyes with him as you fall, knowing he will be there to catch you.

Your moan of pleasure, his name a whispered prayer on your lips, coupled with the sight of you has him following right behind you, all his years of fear and guilt splintering into pieces along with the most intense orgasm he has ever had.   

“I love you, y/n,” he returns in equal measure.

You collapse into his arms, unaware of the tears on your face until you feel them wetting the pink scarf that somehow remains around his neck. Elvis holds you to him, his fingers twirling the ends of your hair, not just with possessiveness and control, but with unfettered love. There is aways to go between the two of you in your relationship, now that you remember everything that has happened, but you have no doubt that the two of you will figure it all out, together this time.

For the first time in forever, you feel truly at peace.

Finally, you are exactly where you need to be.

With the man you love eternally, who loves you just as much.

Here, with Elvis.

*

Please let me know in the comments/DMs/asks if you are interesting in buying a physical and/or ebook of Pink Scarf (with bonus chapters/material)! 💗🧣💗

*

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[greenerteacups]

Hi! I am an ardent fan of your writing, and I hope to be as sorted and planned as you some day in my own writing journey.

My question is: you have a keen eye when it comes to planning character personality, dynamics, and such. I've also been wading through your ask replies, and your insights into how you write people and how you make them play off of each other is so wonderful to read. If it's not too personal a q, how did you learn how to write like this? Did you go to school for writing, does it come from years of observing people, do you have reading list recs for "how to write real people and real interactions"?

Thanks! This is a really flattering question. I'll try to answer it honestly, because I wish someone had been brutally honest about this with me when I was a young writer.

I didn't go to school for writing. I started doing it when I was about nine years old. It sucked very badly. I kept writing throughout high school, and it still mostly sucked, but some of it was occasionally interesting. ("Interesting" here does not mean "good," by the way.) I took a break in college, and then came back. I've been writing ever since. Sometimes, I feel good about it. A lot of the time, I don't!

I hate giving this advice, because I remember how it feels to get it, and it's the most uninspiring, boring-ass, dog shit advice you can get, but it's also the only advice that is 100% unequivocally true: you have to write, and specifically, you have to write things that suck.

I do not mean that you should make things that suck on purpose. I mean that you have to sit down and try your absolute hardest to make something good. You have to put in the hours, the elbow grease, the blood, sweat, and tears, and then you have to read it over and accept that it just totally sucks. There is no way around this, and you should be wary of people who tell you there is. There is no trick, no rule, no book you can buy or article you can read, that will make your writing not suck. The best someone else can do is tell you what good writing looks like, and chances are, you knew that anyway — after all, you love to read. You wouldn't be trying to do this if you didn't. And anyone who says they can teach you to write so good it doesn't suck at first is either lying to you, or they have forgotten how they learned to write in the first place.

So the trick is to sit there in the miserable doldrums of Suck, write a ton, and learn to like it. Because this is the phase of your path as an artist when you find what it is you love about writing, and it cannot be the chance to make "good writing." This will be the thing that bears you through and compels you to keep going when your writing is shit, i.e., the very thing that makes you a writer in the first place. So find that, and you've got a good start.

Some people know this, but assume that perseverance as a writer is about trying to get to the point where you don't suck anymore. This is not true, and it is an actively dangerous lie to tell young writers. You are not aiming to feel like your writing doesn't suck. You are aiming to write. You are aiming to have written. Everything else is dust and rust. And of course, you'll find things you like about your pieces, you'll find things you're proud of, you'll learn to love the things you've made. But that little itch of self-criticism, in the back of your brain — the one that cringes when you read a clunky line, or thinks of a better character beat right after it's far too late to change — that's never going away. That's the Writer part of you. Read Kafka, read Dickens, read Tolstoy, you will find diary entries where they lament how absolutely fucking atrocious their writing was, and how angry they are that they can't do better. A good writer hates their sentences because they can always imagine better ones. And the ability to imagine a better sentence is what's going to make you pick up the pen again tomorrow. And the day after that. And the day after that.

Which is what I mean, and probably what all those other annoying, preachy advice-givers mean, when we say: a good writer is just someone who writes every day. It's that easy, and that hard.

[elliespuns]

This question is simple but it’s been swirling around in my head: do you think Ellie is the type to do drugs? God, just thinking about it automatically sends excitement running through my veins lol I know, I’m messed up.

Oh, I probably disappoint you, but I don't really think she is the type. I mean, look at the dork. I know people like to romanticize her like this; I see a lot of posts and art of Ellie smoking or possibly even doing drugs. But, to be honest, I can't see it.

Not saying she would never try it. I can definitely see her trying to smoke cigarettes, for example (because she's already doing weed), but I don't think she'd be a fan of those long-term, let alone drugs. 

There's a possibility that if she lived in the modern world, she'd be prone to trying drugs under peer pressure—that I can only imagine with someone she's really close with—you know, like, "C'mon, try it. There's a first time for everything." and she'd be like, "Ugh, okay. But just this one time." or something like this, and even after that, she'd probably be like, "What is this shit? That's fucking terrible. Why do you do this to yourself?" (once she'd sober up).

I never really understood the appeal of making Ellie reckless (it's the same as when writers portray Ellie as dominant, bossy, and sometimes even violent). I guess it's something that turns people on? But honestly, it's so far from what Ellie is like (or what she would be like) if we had a chance to see her in these scenarios. I just can't see it.

I'm not saying she's a saint or even a buzzkill. All I'm saying is that she's a shy dork who loves comics, superheroes, and space. She would most likely be spending her days reading books, drawing, or hanging out with the few of her closest friends she'd have, watching movies at her or their place. I can't really imagine her partying and doing drugs. Not even in the modern world. 

Ellie is the type of person you could give your child to, and you'd know she'd take care of her or him. You'd trust her with responsibility even when you know she's a firecracker. Be it young or adult Ellie.

I believe that she wouldn't do drugs. Not saying she wouldn't try some mild ones... but to imagine canon Ellie, I say it's a big NO.

[your-unfriendlyghost]

4, 5, 7, 14

(Okay I really liked these ones fyi)

4. Rank the main 7.

  Ooh tough one. I guess right now, in order of favorite to least favorite, I’d have to go Sodapop, Two-Bit, Steve, Johnny, Ponyboy, Dally, and then finally Darry. But it’s pretty close, and the order changes day by day honestly- I like all of them a lot, y’know? I guess the only one I don’t think about too often is Darry. I still like him and think he’s a really well-written character- I just don’t have a lotta original thoughts about him, is all, whereas I do about all the others. 

5. What are your fave ships?

  In a truly shocking turn of events, I, a frequent draw-er and writer of Stevepop, am going to say Stevepop. I dunno, something about them just makes me happy. Reminds me of like…daydreams I had when I was twelve and crushing on my best friend, and trying to get her attention by doing stupid things and whatever…god I don’t really know how to explain why I like it. Before this fandom I didn’t usually ship things, to be honest. But I guess when I did it’d be stuff like Jesslake in Infinity Train, where it’s the sorta thing that can be seen as platonic or romantic. I reckon Stevepop scratches a similar itch in my brain lol

  But I also really like Marcia x Two-Bit, which I haven’t really talked about here much- They had good chemistry, y’know? I oughta draw something about them sometime

  And then finally there’s my DIY crack-ish ship Soda x Steve x Evie. I like them! It’s all the things I like about Stevepop, plus there’s a cool girl in the mix! I love cool girls! More folks should think about them i think

  I do like other ships okay too- like the Tarry crowd has dragged me in, and sometimes the Jally crowd does too, along with Purly and occasionally Johnnyboy. I’m not an active participant, but when I come across it, I sorta mentally nod and say “nice”, you dig? They’re like…my ship-in-laws. Or like…milk duds and hershey bars- candy I still enjoy, but reach for only after I’m out of milky ways and twizzlers.

7. What are your fave non-romantic relationships? (This can be close friends, familial, enemies or even just acquaintances)

  Two-Bit and Pony! I like them a lot. Their interactions in the book were some of my favorite parts. That line when Two-Bit was worried about Ponyboy using that broken bottle on the Socs…ugh that part was great. I remember reading it for the first time and just sitting there thinking about how much I liked that detail.

  Then on the opposite side of the coin, Steve and Pony lol. I LOVE how Pony doesn’t initially like Dally or Steve, and yet Dally’s chill with Pony…but with Steve the disdain is mutual. Jk I don’t think Steve really hates Pony- but he definitely thinks Pony’s kinda annoying. I like the idea of him watching out for Pony anyways though, like at school especially now that Soda’s not going.

14. Tell us five of your headcanons you basically see as canon

Sodapop has ADHD and maybe (?) dyslexia, but it’s the 60s so he won’t find out till he’s well into adulthood

Marcia gave Two-Bit her real number, and was disappointed when he didn’t call it. I like to imagine they end up remeeting at some point and going out together- even if that’s kinda unrealistic lol

Steve hated Dally when he first rolled into town, because Dally was everything he really wanted to be- tough, cool, and street-smart. And he was also scared of losing Soda, who thought Dally rocked- because Dally’s from New York and rides in rodeos! Eventually they became buddies though when Dally gave Steve a compliment or something. Not even a particularly good one- something like “Hey you ain’t bad at fighting”- just barely enough for Steve to feel like Dally’s earned a little bit of his loyalty. Might write fic/make a comic for this- it’s kinda niche but I think the idea is funny

Steve and Soda secretly listen to the Beach Boys at the DX. They can’t tell anyone because it’s not tuff to like a dumb California band. And Ponyboy would like the Beatles if he listened to them, but he doesn’t, so he won’t realize that until years after Beatlemania has died down

Steve is not just a Ponyboy hater but also a horses-in-general hater. He thinks horses are scary and unpredictable and that cars were invented for a reason. He was secretly relieved when Mr. Curtis stopped Soda from riding rodeos, because seeing Soda on a crazy horse gave him mad anxiety. Pretended he was sad though for Soda’s sake

Thanks so much for asking!! I loved answering these so much lol, definitely let me know your thoughts too on ‘em!

[hannahbarberra162]

She must be the person who most cheers for the death of Whitebeard, a man she doesn't even know, because this is one of the few scenarios that she can maybe be free again and return home.

If she spends 6 hours donating blood and has 8 hours of sleep (considering that she has a regulated sleep), what does she do in the remaining 10 hours? Can she leave the room? Does she sleep in the dorm with the others? Can she walk freely?

Does Whitebeard know of her existence (and that she is in Moby Dick against her will)? Does the whole crew know, or just the commanders?

Does Marco feel the slightest bit guilty? Knowing he's holding someone in the boat against her will? Would he really be able to keep up his threats?

Sorry for the questionnaire, I'm just curious :'D I have so many thoughts about the last one-shot

Hi Luarsunny!! I know this isn't your cup of tea haha. I'm writing a short one shot in your honor that's light and fluffy featuring a normal Marco. To answer some questions:

Marco would absolutely keep up his threats. He’d probably just start by breaking your ankle again, but he'd be willing to do whatever he needs to ensure Pops’s health. You are nothing to him compared to his father / Captain. 

I’d imagine some of the crew knows, but there’s so many people on board and you’re not very noticeable. It’s not a secret but you’re not that important to most people’s daily lives. 

“You’re done for today yoi,” Marco said, pulling the IV out of your arm. You’d been healed by him already, as you always were. Even though he replenished your blood, it always took a lot out of you to give platelets for six hours a day. You felt weak and lethargic, even though Marco had confirmed there was no biological reason for it. You were free to go where you wanted for the next few hours until you were confined to your room for bedtime. Marco locked you in a private room near his own for ten hours at a time, wanting you to get undisturbed sleep and rest away from the rest of the crew. He was neurotic, counting how many hours you slept and if you got up in the night. You were sure he was watching you, but you hadn’t figured out how yet. 

Lately you’d taken to spending time on the top deck when you were free, enjoying the weather outside. Before sailing with the Whitebeard Pirates, you’d never seen snow before. You were from a summer island and enjoyed watching the changes in the weather as the ship sailed through the Grand Line. Marco had banned you from going up to the crow’s nests, where you had originally loved spending time watching the skies. You’d almost fallen once on your climb up and Marco had since forbidden it. So you sat near the figurehead of the whale, thinking about nothing. Or, trying not to. 

Some pirates talked to you, trying to get you to socialize. You’d made a couple of friends, if kidnapping enablers could be considered friends. You were closest to Masked Deuce, who worked in the medical division under Marco. He was around a lot, checking in on you during your long days. You’d discovered he was a writer and loved the same kinds of literature you did, and he would read books to you while you sat immobilized. With Deuce came Ace, another Commander. You didn’t like Ace as much, he didn’t seem to understand the bind you were in. According to him, you should be overjoyed to be providing your platelets to someone as amazing as Whitebeard. But he was kind and charming and would tell you funny stories sometimes, so you let him hang out with you when you had time.

You resented Whitebeard and his crew immensely. You’d met Whitebeard himself once, when Marco had brought you up to meet him at the Captain’s insistence. 

“Thank you child,” the old man said simply, nodding his head in thanks. You had fantasized about this moment many times, imagining how you’d spew your vitriol at the Captain, telling him you hated his ship, his crew, Marco, and most of all, him. But in the face of the World’s Strongest Man, you were unable to do anything except cower, clinging to Marco as if he were your lifeline. “I owe you my good health, which is more precious than any treasure.” You stared at the man four times your size, your words dying in your throat. Marco nudged you.

“You’re welcome.” You didn’t have anything else to say - what could you say? Please let me go home to the detriment of your own health? Your son kidnapped me and I’m here against my will? Marco knew how you felt, he knew you were homesick and cried often at night. If he wanted to let Whitebeard know, he would. Part of you wished Whitebeard would die already, then you might get to go home. But you also thought they might abandon you on some island if you were no longer useful. You would have no money and no way to get home - a perfect set up to be captured by slavers. So for the time being, you were stuck on this godforsaken ship, used as a living blood supply to an Emperor.

Marco had started leaving things in your room without asking - better pillows, softer blankets, warmer clothes, pleasant smelling shampoo, books he thought you might like. You couldn’t be sure if he was trying to assuage his own guilt or if it just helped his goal of keeping you mentally healthy. The other crew tried to be kind in their own ways, offering to teach you how to fight (Marco didn’t allow it), the basics of sailing, how to cook, skills that might be helpful in the future. But it all felt like velvet wrapped around a steel fist. You could enjoy yourself, but ultimately you’d be in that room for six hours a day, no matter how much you cried and begged Marco for a day off.

[jennay]

That's my Spot

An: Just some cute fluff no warnings.

Summary: Jolly and Reader keep running into each other at a local cafe.

If you want to be tagged in Jolly stuff let me know!i

For a week, you had been caught in a silent flirtation. Every day, you would enter the coffee shop, plug in your laptop and phone, and order your usual drink.

He would be there, too, sitting by the cozy fireplace with a book in his hand. He had long, straight hair that fell down the sides of his cheeks and a black sweater with a band logo that gave him a rock star vibe. He always wore sunglasses when he came in but would take them off as soon as he opened his book.

You wondered what color his eyes were and what kind of books he liked to read. You also wondered what his name was and what he did for a living. Was he a student, a writer, a musician, or something else?

Sometimes, your eyes would meet and linger, but neither of you would say anything. You had work to do, and he had his reading. You wanted to talk to him, but you kept telling yourself that he was just a fellow coffee lover and only being friendly because you saw each other so often.

You didn't want to make a fool of yourself by approaching him and finding out he had a girlfriend, or worse, he wasn't interested in you. You were too shy to make the first move and hoped he would do it someday.

Out of the corner of your eye, you admired him. You thought stupid things like, how long did it take to grow his hair that long? Why did he always come in looking like a rock star? Why did he wear sunglasses inside until he started to read? What was his choice of drink, and who reads as much as he does?

You imagined he was a deep thinker, a passionate reader, a mysterious stranger. You wanted to know more about him but didn't know how to start a conversation.

You quietly giggle, hiding your face behind your laptop as you read your emails. The most silly part was he made you think all these things without even saying a word to you. He had a power over you, a magnetic attraction that drew you to him. You felt a flutter in your stomach every time you saw him and a warmth in your cheeks whenever he looked at you.

You stood up, leaving your things unattended; you'd been here so many times you weren't worried about people stealing your things. You'd been going here off and on for over a year. You were addicted to the atmosphere and how the Barista always knew your name. You loved that they could have your order going when they saw you. You mostly loved that you always got your seat by the window to watch everyone walking by; you were curious about their lives even if you'd never know.

"Vanilla Latte?" The Barista asks.

You nod your head, "Of course." You smile, "Can I have it iced today?"

He smiles widely, "Oh?" He questions, "We're switching things up I see. What's the occasion?"

You shrug your shoulders, "I just feel like being spontaneous. Maybe I'm sick." You joke. "That was a bad joke." You nervously laugh, "I don't have covid or anything like that." You take a deep breath, "I'm gonna stand over here in shame now." You shake your head, thoroughly embarrassed by your actions. You wondered if people could tell you didn't get out much. You heard snickering from where your mystery guy sat, but he dug his nose back in his book when you looked over. Cool. You thought you made an ass out of yourself, and people heard it.

The Barista calls your name, and you thank him for your drink. Your cheeks are red as you walk back to your spot; you hide your face in your laptop, never wanting to be seen again. You sip your iced vanilla latte and try to focus on your work, but you can't help stealing glances at him. You wonder if he thinks about you outside this place like you did about him.

You returned to the café, as you did every weekday morning, following your unbreakable routine. Today, you skipped the coffee line. You skipped everything, even though you had planned on treating yourself to a latte as soon as your meeting was over.

You only had about five minutes to set up your laptop and join the online chat. You couldn't afford to be late, even though you desperately craved your caffeine fix.

You froze in your tracks, seeing him sitting at your table. The one by the window, with the power outlet and the cozy cushion. The one that you always occupied, without fail. The one that kept you sane in the midst of your hectic schedule.

You had difficulty adapting to change, and it was about to show. You didn't have time to confront him. You didn't have time to politely ask him to move, not that you would. You were not the type to cause a scene, and you didn't have any claim to the damn spot.

Instead, you settled for the table across from him, feeling panic as you tossed all your belongings on the table and hastily plugged your laptop in. You put your headphones on and press the speak button on your mic. "Yep, I'm ready when you guys are." You said in a rushed tone. "Go ahead whenever you're ready. I'll be in the background and let you know if I hear anything odd on the recording." You assured your coworker.

You tilted your head back, staring at the ceiling. You felt like a fool as you shifted your legs around; you even attempted to put your legs over the chair beside you and lean against the wall while you listened to them talk. You gave up on sitting comfortably. Your eyes met his, and you gave him a small smile, finally noticing that his eyes were a deep shade of brown. "Nope," you said. "It still sounds clear on this end."

You tap your fingers nervously on the table, feeling restless and annoyed by the people standing behind you and everyone who keeps passing you. It was distracting. You couldn't focus on the meeting, which was already boring enough. You wondered why you had to attend this online conference when you could have just watched the recording later. You had no interest in the topic and didn't know anyone else in the virtual room. You felt like you were wasting your time.

You put your hands in your lap and close your eyes, trying to ignore everything as you continue to listen. The speaker droned on and on, using jargon and acronyms that made no sense to you.

You wished you could mute him or, better yet, leave the meeting. But you had to stay because your boss expected you to. You sighed, hoping the session would end soon.

Your eyes snap open when you hear something set on your table. You stare down at the cup in front of you and see him walking back to his table.

You peek over your laptop to see him smile as he sits down again. You smile like a child, thankful for your gift. You mouth thank you to him and take a sip of your coffee; he knows your order.

It shouldn't feel as special as it did, but no one seemed to remember small details about you, and this was new.

He had never done anything like this before. He had never acknowledged you except for the occasional eye contact and nod. He had never spoken to you or even asked your name. He had never shown any sign that he noticed or cared about you.

But now, he had bought you a coffee. He had made a gesture that said he wanted to connect with you. He had made you feel something you hadn't felt in a long time. He had made you happy.

It's not until fifteen minutes later, when you're ending your meeting that you see writing on the cup, not just an order but something he'd written. "Sorry, I took your spot. Come sit with me?" You read the words, and your mouth slightly drops. Was this actually happening? Was he inviting you to join him? Was he interested in you? You bite your lip, hoping he'll be there when the meeting ends.

When the time comes, you take a deep breath, thankful to be done, and you see him still sitting there; this time, he's scrolling on his phone.

You feel excitement and nervousness as you decide to approach him. You quietly pack up your belongings and head towards him. You stop at the table before sitting and say, "Is it still ok if I sit?"

He looks up and smiles, his eyes sparkling. He nods and gestures for you to join him. "Of course, please sit. I've been waiting for you." He says, his voice warm and inviting.

You feel a glow in your chest when he smiles at you. He gently puts his hand out to introduce himself to you. "I'm Joakim, but my friends call me Jolly." He says, his name sounding exotic and charming.

You quickly notice his accent. You extend your hand and feel electricity when he touches it. "I'm y/n…and that's what everyone calls me." You say, trying to sound casual. You laugh nervously. "Thank you for the coffee."

His brown eyes watch you curiously as if he wants to know everything about you. "It's the least I could do for taking your spot." He says, his tone is playful and apologetic.

You shrug and smile. "It's ok, it's not like it has my name on it or anything." You say, pretending to be cool with it. You set your bag next to your feet. "But please don't make me sit over there again." You say, pointing to the noisy and crowded area where you had your meeting. You laugh, hoping he'll laugh with you.

He nods. "I promise I won't. I'll save this spot for you if you want." He says, his eyes twinkling. "Or better yet, why don't you sit with me next time? I'd love to have some company." He says, his voice lowering and his smile turning into a smirk. "You know we could even spend some time outside of the cafe together."

You feel your face heat up and your heart race. You bite your lip and look into his eyes. You see a hint of nervousness and a lot of interest.

You nod and smile back. "I'd like that."

You think this might be the beginning of something extraordinary. You think this is fate.

[mybworlds]

Bittersweet

CHAPTER 1

status: ongoing

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

summary: your life is full of 'must'. You live with your overprotective mother who controls every aspect of your life. You have a dream, to write romance novels, but love - real love - you haven't found yet. Your mother has even decided what you must do in your free time: play music. One day, however, when you go to your music teacher's house, you will have an unexpected encounter and from that day on things change…

rating: 18+ explicit (minors, DNI)

Before to start... Hello people, I know there are other two ff that I already started, but I dreamt this new idea for my new ff. So I decided to write it down it. So here we are. If you want to let me know what you think about it I'd be glad to read you.

No offence pls, if you dislike it go away :)

Thanks @vase-of-lilies for the banner

You always dreamed of doing something special, of being the person who would make a difference in the world….

So you hoped.

You hoped to become a great writer of romance novels, and you hoped to instill hope in the hearts of young people not to give up in the face of love and the possible obstacles that may arise.

But not all dreams come true.

In fact, you ended up working in a small bar on the outskirts of your town, surrounded by the many stories of the many diners who populate the place during the daytime or evening hours--depending on the shifts. These stories are the most different, and cannot help but feed your wild imagination.

In the evening, when you are not on shift, you write dozens and dozens of stories on your computer: some are shorts, some are very long and have happy endings, some less. It depends on your mood and how you imagine certain events you've witnessed or heard will end.

"I'm home!"

Your mother has just returned from a nearly seventy-two-hour shift at the hospital, she works in emergency medicine, and - since your father died (or at least she always said) - when she's not at home, you have to do everything, housework and bar work, grocery shopping, paying bills.

"Hi, Mom."

You absentmindedly greet her by putting down your computer glasses and crinkling your eyes in exhaustion.

"Did you buy groceries?"

The usual string of questions starts, to which you always answer with a distracted yes. You are almost 30 years old, but sometimes you feel like you are 40s or even 50s. Sometimes you think you would just like to enjoy youth, to be carefree, light-hearted, you would like to be free even to make mistakes, and instead you feel caged in this life. In a life where the only rule is you must.

"So you're okay with that?" your mother suddenly asks, making you get your feet back on the ground.

"What?" you ask confused.

"You might even listen to me for once!" blurts out Mom.

"I just got distracted for a second!" you exclaim trying to catch up.

Mom snorts, "I asked you if you were free tomorrow for your guitar lesson."

Ah yes, the exhilarating guitar lessons!

Mom, ever since Dad left (but she always said it was as if he was dead), has demanded that you take piano lessons first and guitar lessons later, like your father. You can't understand your mother, sometimes she seems to hate your father, sometimes she doesn't.

About love, you've always wanted it to be forever. Maybe it's just some romantic bullshit you always watched in movies or read in books, but you want to believe that there really exists out there for you, someone who is willing to love you for a lifetime. Too bad you haven't found anyone so far who is willing to love you the same way you love, to want you the way you want!

Going back to your guitar lessons, your teacher is a bit of a peculiar guy, a bit of a loner, a lover of many things and one opposed to the other. He's -- you don't know exactly how to define him. You've never been able to decipher him. He seems gruff, but at the same time he has a good side and probably deep down sweet.

Very deep down.

"Yes, don't worry." Mom, ever since he left, has become overprotective in some ways with you, has demanded to control you even though you are not so young anymore, wants to know what you read, what you see, what you do. It may seem normal, perhaps, for a mom to try to get to know what her child does, but not the way she does. If you are evasive for one reason for another, she becomes a hound, suffocating almost. Once she even demanded to read a chat you created with friends fearing that you might be in touch with a man much older than you, and instead she found herself a chat where you were exchanging sometimes funny and sometimes even private messages with some of your close friends from school, which even embarrassed you, but mom justified herself by saying she was doing it for you. She even banned you from driving for fear that you might have a car accident! You have a driver's license, but your mother won't even let you drive around town. She always has to be the one to drive you. These manias of hers are suffocating!

"Good. Do you have money to pay for it?" she asks you.

"Yes, don't worry," you reply, going to prepare dinner.

"We have to be very punctual or I'll be late for the hospital," she informs you.

"Do you have another night?" you ask her "It will be the fifth time in a month! But didn't there used to be shifts once even in the hospital?" you ask again as you prepare some pasta.

"Yes, but -- you know, there are only a few of us and then there are even more emergencies than usual."

You follow your mother with your eyes as you see her typing on her cell phone. Your mother sometimes looks like the young woman and you look like the mom.

What an unfair life!

The next day your life flows as usual, you get up very early, make coffee bringing it also to your mother, go to shower, get dressed and go to work.

At the café there is the usual hustle and bustle, who wants coffee, who wants a croissant, who wants a slice of pizza, who wants something else. You don't have a moment to yourself. Only when it's almost lunchtime now, you stop and go to the back of the store to eat your sandwich and smoke. Yes, you smoke. The only real transgression in your life. If your mother found out she would probably kill you, but you don't care smoking makes you feel good and maybe it makes you feel good because it's a decision you made, not because it was forced on you.

You rub one temple and look toward the road covered with a hint of snow. You wonder what you would have been doing by now if you had not been there with your mother, if maybe you were busy in college or maybe in pursuing some master's degree, you wonder who you might have been if you had dared to live your life to the fullest.

In the afternoon, your mother - after making sure you are dressed appropriately, that you have sheet music and whatnot - drops you off in front of your teacher's building.

The latter lives on the top of seven floors, it's practically a penthouse, it's beautiful place. Being with him -- a little less so.

When you knock, you are about to greet him, but a completely different man from your teacher appears in front of you. He is tall, much taller than your teacher and you, curly brown hair, dark eyes, a look that is at first grim, then curious, defined jaw line and curved nose. He is perhaps 40 years old.

You stand open-mouthed, thinking you had the wrong house for a moment, then realizing it's the right address.

"I was looking for Mr. Miller," you say.

"In person." he replies.

"Tommy Miller," you say.

"I'm his brother." he says again.

You are about to say something, but he is the one who interrupts you by asking if you are his student and calling your name, you nod in confusion.

"My brother had to leave yesterday morning. He told me you were coming and to wait for you to let you know." he clarifies by placing his hands on his hips.

He is incredibly muscular; you have never seen a man like him. He hits you right away.

"I see. Then -- I'll go." ready to leave.

You make to turn your back to him "Did Mommy tell you not to talk to strangers?" he asks making you turn back to him "I saw you get out of your mother's car." he adds noticing your confused look.

"What did you say?" you ask in annoyance.

You see him smirking and cross his arms "Are you afraid the big bad wolf will eat you?"

You wrinkle your forehead "First, I don't even know who you are." you say moving a couple of steps closer to him "And second…"

"Joel." he introduces himself by extending his hand.

"You're creepy -- Joel," you say looking first at his hand and then at his face.

"You, on the other hand, are shy." he notes looking at you and running his gaze over your figure. No one has ever looked at you like this. Making your skin warmed. "Yes, you are a shy little one." he adds, smiling and making wrinkles appear on the sides of his eyes.

"Your brother is definitely nicer," you say.

Lie. Tommy has always been very much on his own.

He just bends his head to the side, "Funny, people always told me I'm the nice one of the Miller brothers."

Gotcha.

"Well, maybe they never really knew you!"

"And you in less than a minute figured out who am I?" he asks, leaving you speechless.

No, you know very well that you cannot judge anyone in less than a minute. If someone had judged you in less than a minute they probably would have dismissed you as an ordinary young woman, lacking dreams of her own, trivial.

Perhaps the same thing applies to the man in front of you, Joel Miller.

[bonefall]

Now that you've said it, I think that might actually be one of the big issues with Warriors. A refusal to commit to the story-that's-being-written, instead of the story-that-was-planned. Things can take unexpected turns, and you end up losing out on a lot if you force the story to stay exactly on course.

Literally, in my own current (non-wc) writing project, I had a character outright reject his entire redemption arc. He went from "realizes how badly he's fucked up, has a breakdown about it, and eventually picks up the pieces and starts moving forward trying to be better" to "realizes he was never going to be able to achieve his goal, has a breakdown about it and refuses to reevaluate his actions, and dies still despising the people he was cruel to." I hadn't expected that outcome, and I spent at least a week trying to bend him back into place, but I realized that things would start to break if I did that.

Like. Imagine if the writing team just took what they actually had and ran with it instead of insisting that what they had intended (however much they actually do plan this shit lmao) is exactly the same as what's on the page when it's not. So much of the plot (especially DotC lol) could have been so much better if they'd just followed the path where it lead instead of bending the narrative awkwardly to fit whatever they wanted.

I think a major reason for it is probably the ghostwriting setup they have. TPB was able to have the mind-twisting Scourge situation at the very end because there was, essentially, one writer in charge of the story. They could just DO something wild if they wanted to.

But nowadays, like, one person writes each book and they don't even have time to read the previous one before making the next. So you get series like DOTC which have egregious continuity errors between books. Sometimes even the very NEXT book will forget something huge, like how Blazing Star completely forgot that Thunder and Clear Sky never actually faced off in the First Battle.

So they could never change course. It's a relay race. Each person has their own stretch to run, they don't really see in front or in back of them.

It's a shame, but a big reason why personal passion projects are more flexible and good to keep in mind as a comparison.