#sometimes also fairly badly

[july-19th-club]

above all of the other things good bad and sillyridiculous that it is, bbc merlin (2008) is a long, slow, dreadful commentary on being closeted among people you love but cannot trust, and the two primary characters this commentary follows (merlin and morgana) each take opposite, yet equally destructive, paths to deal with this struggle. his assimilationist tendencies put him in danger as often as they protect him, and he can never fully know whether his friends and family would protect him if he were out or not. she goes full rebel, but allows it to embitter her until she can't see good anywhere and her eagerness for justice curdles into a habit of violence that also fails to change the society that produced that habit in any meaningful way. and there is no golden age, because no matter how much you'd like to try, it takes more faith than anyone here could reasonably be expected to have to be open when your life is on the line

[piplupod]

it really is kind of crazy how much lifelong abuse warps your nervous system's idea of safety and comfort. like I'm still living with my abuser(s) but every time i get home from the centre where they treat me kindly, i feel some kind of fear as if I've done something wrong while I was out but also this vague relief to be back at the place where abuse happens. it's so strange. i have such a wonderful time in a place where they listen to me and are interested in what i have to say and they treat me with kindness and respect, and then I come home to this hell house and I immediately feel ill but relieved because all of the niceness I'd just experienced feels so wrong, but now i'm back where i am hurt so that is comfortable. its what is known and expected.

it really is like abuse is just... what is comfortable for me. and I hate that. when I'm around people who treat me kindly I am always waiting for the metaphorical other shoe to drop, and also having to control my urge to ruin it purposefully before I ruin it accidentally. like some part of me sometimes wants to goad people into being angry at me because that feels like it's what is Supposed To Happen.

[cutielando]

Omg i love your writing style!! Can we get an Oscar loving reader's breasts???? Luv you 🩷

loving on my girls | o.p.

warnings!!: light smut (mainly just touching, groping, kissing and sucking on your breasts), worshipping, praising, reader is described as having medium to large sized boobs

my masterlist

Oscar was a very simple man.

He loved and cherished every single thing about his girlfriend, no matter how small or maybe insignificant.

But there was something that he loved just about more than anything else.

Your boobs.

They were most probably his favorite part of your body, aside from your face and pretty eyes.

He was fairly shy about his love for your boobs at the beginning of your relationship, not wanting to really make it known how much he loved just staring at them or sleeping on them whenever the two of you would cuddle.

But you were a woman, and you were very attentive of everything Oscar did from the very beginning. Of course you saw the sneaky glances he would give your cleavage, the sparkle in his eyes whenever he would watch you change in front of him.

Especially the way his cheeks would heat up every time you would have sex together, paying extra attention to your breasts.

You knew how obsessed he was, and you found it very endearing.

But you also liked to sometimes tease him about it, purposefully wearing low-cut shirts, asking him to massage your breasts whenever you were on your period because "they just hurt so badly", asking his opinion whenever you would drag him into Victoria's Secret to buy lingerie.

You fed into his obsession, and he loved you all the more for it.

He got especially clingy after he would be away from you racing and would come home in the late hours of the night, the atmosphere in the whole city and your apartment quiet and peaceful.

Oscar was especially craving your breasts when he got back from the triple header from Belgium.

You had talked on the phone for the 3 weeks he was away racing, and you more than satisfied his need to see "his girls", but it just wasn't the same for him.

He needed to feel them. He needed to touch them and worship the hell out of them.

"How are my girls doing?" he asked you as you talked on the phone before his plane took off.

"They're waiting for their favorite guy to come home" you replied, smiling when you heard the groan he let out on the other end of the phone.

"I can't wait to get my hands on them"

Some would say his obsession was not healthy, but you found it endearing that he was so enamored by your breasts and so eager to get back home to you.

Oscar didn't get back until after midnight, and you had taken a small nap because you got tired trying to stay up and wait for him.

But the jiggling of keys on the other side of the door woke you up, just in time to see Oscar dropping his bags next to his suitcase in the hall and running straight towards the couch, plopping down next to you and scooping you up in his arms in a bear hug.

"I missed you so much" he whispered against your ear, his arms tightening his hold on you.

You buried your face into the crook of his neck, closing your eyes and inhaling his scent, the smell of him comforting you after being away from each other for so long.

"I missed you too, Oz" you whispered back, relishing in the fact that he was finally back home, back with you where he belonged.

Oscar squeezed you one last time before he pulled away from the hug, cupping your cheek and connecting your lips in a desperate and passionate kiss.

You both lost yourselves into the love and passion, forgetting about the time or anything else. Your hands were lost in the hair at the back of his head, his hands were touching and rubbing at every part of your body that he could reach, slowly inching upwards towards the place he really, really missed.

He pulled away from the kiss as soon as he felt the underside of your boobs against his hands, his eyes immediately falling on them, hidden away by the bra and small t-shirt you had fallen asleep in.

"Can I?" he asked, his hand pointing towards the hem of your shirt.

You smiled and nodded, letting him take off the shirt and leave you in your white lacy bra.

Oscar sighed out, blissfully smiling at the sight of his favorite girls staring back at him.

"I'm starting to think you've missed my boobs more than you've missed me" you joked, leaning back against the couch as Oscar scooted even closer to yours, his finger tracing gentle shapes on the pump flesh of your left boob.

"Don't be silly. They're second on the list, though" he said, stealing a glance at you just in time to see you laughing and smiling widely.

He looked back down at the soft flesh, his hand sneakily migrating towards your back and quickly unhooking your bra, scooping it up and throwing it somewhere behind him.

The minute his attention went back to your boobs, he was done for.

He leaned down and started planting kisses along the plump flesh of your right boob, his hands fondling with your left one, pinching and twisting at your nipple.

You let out a sigh and relaxed against the back of the couch, closing your eyes. You were used to Oscar giving your boobs this kind of attention, and you both learned how to do this without everything turning sexual.

This is routine for you guys, something through which Oscar wants to show his love for you and your beautiful body.

"Did they get bigger when I was away?" Oscar asked, pulling away for just a second to examine them.

You opened your eyes and looked down at him, smiling and letting out a chuckle once you noticed how intently he was inspecting your boobs.

"I think so. I had to get a size up on my bra when I went shopping with your sister when she came to visit" you said, biting your lip to stifle a giggle once you saw how wide and excited Oscar's eyes had got.

"I go away for a couple of weeks and you two decide to surprise me when I come back" Oscar spoke to your boobs, making you smile.

Would people think this was weird?

Definitely.

But this was something very dear to both you and Oscar, and you didn't care what anybody else would think.

Especially not Oscar, not when it came to his 2 favorite girls.

After you, of course.

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[strwberri-milk]

hihiii, hope you've been staying hydrated!!!

i have had brainworms about touch-starved genshin men being extra sensitive in every way possible when it comes to being close/intimate with the reader - cuddling, casual affection, sex, etc. etc. obviously write what you're feeling, but i was thinking about diluc, dainsleif, kaeya, and alhaitham!!

Diluc doesn't realise how badly he needs your attention until he's suddenly deprived of it when leaving for a business trip. Upon his return to you he refuses to let go of you. You end up walking around with his arm around your waist or his chin resting on your shoulder.

He doesn't seem to be able to get enough of you, spending the day holding you and the night making you forget everything but his name. He kisses you with a vengeance, hands running all over your body and squeezing you tightly, not leaving an inch of your body untouched.

He'll be a little embarrassed about it when his brain is less fuzzy with need for you, refusing to admit that he missed you as much as he did. It's really a moot point though considering the fact that he's still holding your hand, not wanting to let go of you.

Dainsleif isn't super into physical affection - his preferred method to show you affection is through acts of service. However, sometimes he does look at you and just decide that he needs to squeeze the shit out of you but like, in a loving way.

You squeak a little when he comes up behind you to wrap his arms around you, holding you close. You give him a confused look when you feel his grip tighten around you a little. He's worried he's already hurt you, backing offYwhen you pull his arms back around you.

You don't mind that he's staying attached to you. It's a little awkward with how big he is and how he's hanging off of you but you decide not to question it. He's not normally this affectionate with you but you really like it, not wanting to drive too much attention to it in case he gets too in his head about it.

Kaeya also suffers from cute aggression and when he looks at you it's terminal. You know he wants to hold you when he stares intensely at you, not saying anything but his hands almost twitch a little. He wants you to come closer but he doesn't know how to ask, staring at you longingly until you sit yourself down on his lap.

His arms wrap around you, sighing happily as he cuddles you up, You let him lightly pinch and tease you, letting him work out some of his feelings towards you through other physical means. That ends up with you underneath him, Kaeya deciding not to tease you too much right now in favour of drawing as much pleasure out of you as he can.

His stamina is normally pretty good but now it seems endless. He's holding you tightly, wrists pinned above your head as he has his way with you. His voice threads itself into your ear, cooing sweetly as he praises you for taking him so well. He's pretty happy with himself when it seems that he's melted your brain a little, peppering your forehead in kisses so sweetly it's like he never fucked your brains out.

Al Haitham's neediness manifests very subtly. You can barely tell that he's craving you until you feel his sigh on your shoulder as he pulls you into his chest. He puts his chin on your shoulder, nuzzling against you a little as he leans against the counter while he holds you.

He remains fairly quiet, not really responding to anything you say to him because all he can think about is how much he missed you and how badly he needs to feel you pressed up against him. He turns his head to press some kisses against your cheek, telling you quietly that he missed you after a while.

You end up directing him to the couch so he can hold you in a more comfortable manner. You manage to convince him to put his head in your lap, running your fingers through his hair and talking at him about nothing. The noise allows him to relax, closing his eyes as he takes all of you in, subtly nuzzling against you as his brain goes quiet for once.

[butch-reidentified]

anyone here seen the show Resident Alien?

bc holy shit am I obsessed with the portrayal of 30-something women, their solidarity, feminism, friendship, and fun and self-expression! GODDD I did not realize how BADLY I needed to see a tv show actually depict (attractive but not "bikini models" by any means) adult (and admit they're adults, real adults not 20 yr olds) women as human beings with deep complex personalities and relationships, who really stand with each other despite being flawed humans who do sometimes hurt each other, who are silly and goofy and get into shenanigans bc oh my god WOMEN CAN STILL HAVE FUN AFTER TURNING 30.

Especially later in season 1 and in season 2 (I'm still on s2), there's just so much female badassery and solidarity that I love. there's also a gym workout scene in s2 with my favorite character D'Arcy and tbhhhh that scene is 😨🥵 Like, my wife said "this scene was definitely filmed by a lesbian, right?" 💀 It really did feel like celebrating an attractive woman build muscle without the typical male gaze-y lens. it actually focused on her flexion, facial expressions, sweat, flushing, yk, the things we are supposed to pretend women don't do even while vigorously exercising.

this same woman leads her friends on a drunken midnight raid of town hall where they review the town budget and discover they're paid less than the men. cut to the entire group of women (one of whom is the mayor's wife) standing in the mayor's bedroom in the middle of the night, standing over him and informing him "no, this isn't a nightmare, what the fuck is wrong with you, pay us fairly" like?? holy shit lmao. D'Arcy then proceeds to RENT A HELICOPTER to drop fliers all over town telling women about this and encouraging female solidarity in fighting back. this barely scratches the surface of her character's feminist heroics. in another seen she cuts the brakes on her best friend's abuser's truck and sends it down a hill in front of him, before telling him she'll happily kill him if he gets near her friend again. it's just so much fun to see. she also rescues herself and 2 others from a crevasse in the glacier by climbing 30 feet in a storm with a broken wrist. oh and shes a FORMER OLYMPIC SKIER bc fuck you

I've actually been very impressed with this show in a number of ways. they have a young girl character whose family is Muslim, and the writers seem to want to critique Islam while being aware that they have to avoid performative liberals picking up on this too much. so at first I was a bit 👀 thinking they were going a certain way with the character, but they ended up sneaking in a lot of critiques of Islamic patriarchy. they keep surprising me.

[jaylleoo14]

Sometimes I like to think that the guys in NRC that have intimidating auras like Riddle, Leona, Malleus, and Floyd for example all get shy and fidgety to initiate more physical touch towards their s/o in the beginning of their relationship ukno? Like dont get me wrong, anyone can think or say otherwise that that may not be the case. BUT LIKE, imagining them being all shy at first and giddy in the stomach as they fidget their fingers and look over at you or maybe looking away with their cheeks a little red🤭 (The envision is envisioning):

Riddle: If you don't mind, can I perhaps scoot a bit closer to you?

You: of course you can Riddle haha

Riddle scooting closer to you with a shy smile on his face, his cheeks going red: May I also perhaps uhm, if you don't mind, held your hands too?

You with an animated cartoon piercing through their heart: godyouresocutethisiswhyiloveyousomuch *AHEM* of course Riddle. I'd love to

Cue a happy Riddle holding hands with you as you both lean into each other comfortably. He lets out a gingerly smile as he rubs his thumb against your hand and squishes next to you ever the more ^^

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leona watching your back as you do your homework, his tail swishing around in a lazy yet obvious eager manner as he lays on his side

You: I can feel you staring you know

Leona: But you don't feel my arms around you, do you Herbivore?

You: Did you want to put your arms around me?

Leona: I would like to, yes. Can I do that?

You let out a little snort, a chuckle escaping you as a small grin spreads on your face.

Leona: What's with that reaction? >:(

You: Nothing, I just find this side of you to be very nice

Leona: All my sides are always nice

You: Sure sure whatever you say

Leona comes over from behind and peers over your shoulder as you lean into his touch and his arms wrap around you snuggly. He nuzzles his cheek against the crown of your head as you continue to do your homework and you could swear he was purring...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Malleus: Child of Man, there is something I want to try and do with you

You: Hmm? What is it?

Malleus looking deep into your eyes all seriously: I want to attempt doing that with you

You turn to look at where he was pointing and see another couple in the far distance. The lady was holding her girlfriend up in the air and twirling her in her arms as they looked at each other, the look on their faces seeming so in love with one another with their warm smiles.

Malleus: I reassure you that I'll keep in mind of my strength if that helps ease you. I ask for permission to hold you

You let out a small giggle: Oh Malleus, i'm not scared. I'd love to be in your arms

After giving him the green light he does just that, doing as the couple did earlier as he lifts you into his arms and twirls you into the air. You go in for a hug and he gladly reciprocates with a big smile. Though he may be starting to squeeze a little too hard-

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Floyd just resting his cheek on his arm as he leans on one of the counters in Mostro Lounge, watching you study for an upcoming test.

You: Why are you just looking at me like that?

Floyd: Cus' yer so cute

You getting all red in the face: What? Floyd dont you have a shift right now? I came over to study because you said you wanted to see me

Floyd coming up to your booth and sitting in front of you: Yea but now that ya here, I wanna squish you so badly :(

You: Is that gonna make you focus back onto your shift?

Floyd: Maybe~ So? Can I squish ya?

You: Fine. Just for a short moment because I have to focus on this material and you need to go back to work

Floyd: Yay!

Floyd hops up and comes over to your side at the speed of a bullet train, wrapping his arms and legs around you with a tight cuddle session. Time seems to have passed fairly fast and you didn't even notice that until Jade came over to tell you that you had just spent close to an hour cuddling Floyd. Close of an hour worth of study time missed and close to an hour of Floyd's shift gone.

[wonysugar]

hiii!! could i request fwb switch!ryujin x reader? it's completely fine if you're not comfy to dw!!

hickeys | shin ryujin

synopsis : it was a secret nobody could know, and you would’ve liked to keep it that way, however, ryujin leaving marks everywhere on your body truly did not make that easy.

pairing : gp!ryujin x fem!reader

genre : friends with benefits, smut!

tags : like one page of texting, g!p wbk, quickie, forbidden ig??, she’s your older brother’s best friend we all know she is not supposed to be fucking you, bathroom sex, nipple play, making out ofc, fingering, clit play, ryujin is strong so manhandling kind of, daddy kink, lots of dirty talk, jock ryujin, mirror sex(?), almost caught, that funky stuff, switchy activities

warning : none!

word count : 2.5k

your older brother occasionally having ryujin over wasn’t at all a bad thing, quite the opposite, actually, considering you both were incredibly close to her growing up.

she was incredibly chill, always dressed well, was super close with your brother, was fairly muscular, attracted everyone just by being in close proximity to them and was also like, 5 years older than you. so naturally, you took a huge liking to her. you admired her a lot when you were younger, she seemed so perfect. you didn’t quite know if you wanted her or if you wanted to be her.

things took a turn, though, and that quickly clarified things for you.

13 year old y/n definitely wouldn’t believe that 20 year old y/n was having sex on the lay-low with ryujin basically every week if you told her. who would’ve thought!

it always happened randomly, too. one would get inexplicably horny, the other would have to help them out, and it was a repeated cycle every time she came over. an unwritten agreement, if you will. sometimes, you’d even sneak into her house late at night because she’d randomly call you on the phone, telling you all about how she was jacking off thinking about you. in summary, you guys would fuck frequently.

very frequently.

today wasn’t any different!

the three of you were sitting on the sofa, watching a god-awful horror movie that made you wanna poke your eyes out each time a character did something insanely stupid, which was quite often, by the way. you clearly weren’t interested in the film whatsoever, so it’s not like ryujin standing up to go to the bathroom went unnoticed. she threw you a sly glance before casually walking to the restroom.

you already knew what she was doing, she’s done it many times before, and she’ll definitely keep doing it. you decided to wait it out though, immediately giving her what she wants takes away all the fun.

upon reading the message, you rolled your eyes, wearing a smirk, then quickly peeked over your shoulder, trying to see if your brother was awake. 

oh he was knocked out.

you internally celebrated as you saw him laying there with his eyes closed, peacefully resting as he quietly snored. you waited it out for a couple of minutes, making ryujin lose her patience has always been amusing to you, so, it was a natural reaction. getting up slowly, trying your hardest not to make any sort of noise, you then make your way to the washroom. 

upon opening the door and entering, you were immediately greeted by a pair of hungry lips being pressed onto yours, which happened for quite a bit. you could tell how worked up she was getting over a simple kiss. she smirked against you, and you quickly felt one of her hands cupping your ass while hearing the other seemingly locking the bathroom door, just in case your brother did wake up. 

once she was assured that the door was locked, she quickly gravitated her mouth lower on your body, from your lips to your jaw, down to your neck and, later on, your chest. her own body rubbing itself on yours, you felt how desperate she was for you, how badly she wanted you.

you even felt it from the not-so-subtly boner gently poking at your upper thigh.

“fuck baby i’ve missed you so much–” she told you in between kisses, embracing your body as if she hadn’t fucked the ever living shit out of you like- not even 4 days ago. you pulled away, scoffing,

“mmh- you just cannot live without getting your dick sucked, can you?”

instead of replying, she simply took your hand and lightly placed it on her crotch, breathing out of relief from the slight contact before pulling you back in, her lips getting hungrier by the second for you. you could finally properly feel how hard she was, and it was… ego flattering, really. i mean, who would’ve thought that shin ryujin, a jock who played basically every girl who breathed in her direction, would be this needy? for you, might i add.

i mean, really, she had girls sobbing over her, begging her to take them back. she ruined their lives, basically. she had the tendency to love-bomb the fuck out of her talking stages, sometimes even lasting months on end. then once they got attached, she’d ghost them out of nowhere and move onto the next.

ryujin wasn’t a marriage kind of girl, hell, she wasn’t a dating kind of girl either.

it was incredibly fortunate that you weren’t, either.

you gently rubbed your hand on her boner through the fabric of her jeans, hearing the noises coming out of her was like fuel to you, by this point, you wanted to hear more.

and despite yourself, you were getting impatient.

you unzipped the bracket of her jeans and pulled them down in a swift motion, her clothed cock bouncing up, hitting your lower stomach. you kept palming it as you kissed her, taking in every sound she let out whilst you rubbed the tip of her dick through the fabric of her underwear. feeling her twitch against your hand, you finally got down on your knees, your eye level exactly where it needed to be.

“so desperate for me, hm? i barely even did anything, and you’re already squirming.” you teased, looking up at her wearing the same smirk she had when she was headed for the bathroom in the first place.

“come on y/n, don’t play around like this—”

“you’re gonna have to talk to me in a nicer tone if you want something to be done about your situation, ryujin. just to remind you, you brought me here, at least ask nicely.” you told her sternly, earning a small, pathetic whine from her.

“pleasee..” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

“please what?”

she whined more, before muttering, “pleaseee suck me off..”

you grinned, the sounds of her begs amusing you greatly as you watched her shudder due to the hot breath she felt on her dick. not wanting to tease her any longer, you simply took all of it in your mouth in one go. ryujin had to cover her mouth immediately after, afraid of being too loud. however, you were making it impossible to stay quiet. 

she whimpered against her own hand, trying her hardest not to be moaning out your name like she usually would. she watched you bob your head up and down her girthy shaft as you glanced up at her occasionally with the most lustful eyes she’d ever seen. the fact that she had to be quiet, the feeling of having her cock deep inside of your warm and wet mouth, the way you pushed your hair back when it got in the way; all of it made her twitch uncontrollably.

while you blew her, she couldn’t help but ponder about what she wanted to do to you, you made it so complicated for her. she would usually just fuck girls normally then move on, but with you? she wanted to use you in the most dehumanizing ways possible, then once she was done, she’d wanna get used by you and be treated like a little bitch in heat. 

you just made her feel and think things she didn’t even know she could. no seriously, who would’ve thought that ms. shin ryujin would enjoy being dominated every once in a while? 

you did, apparently. hence why you’re in the situation you’re in right now.

and she truly didn’t want to admit it, but you were the best fuck she’s ever had. 

she’d been breathing heavier up until now, you knew she wanted to cum, she was getting closer to the edge and it showed.

you pulled your mouth away from her dick, panting heavily from the lack of air in your lungs as you tried to catch your breath. you still gave her throbbing cock attention by rubbing the tip with your thumb, you rightfully assumed that she probably would’ve died without it, “how badly do you want to fuck me right now?” you asked before spitting in your hand and using it to keep stroking her rock hard boner.

she looked down at you, running her hand through her soft short hair as she leaned against the bathroom counter, attempting to keep her loud whines contained, “sosososo bad–” was all she managed to get out before she had to cover her mouth.

cute, you thought.

watching her lose herself under your touch, whether it be minimal or not, you couldn’t help but giggle. she always went crazy for you, and you would be stupid not to notice her efforts at pleasing you.

she’d been so good for you up until now, and you felt like she could have her oh-so-deserved reward of finally being able to cum. 

you look up at her and quickly shove her dick back into your mouth, bobbing your head up and down in swift movements as she tried her hardest not to scream out your name, she could feel your tongue tracing down the length of her shaft.

“f-fuck y/n baby i’m cumming fuckfuck—“

it didn’t take long before you felt her cock throbbing, feeling it shoot out a huge load of its thick and warm juices fill up your throat as she grunted. you immediately swallowed every last drop.

what can you say? muscle memory always does its job.

still coming down from her high, she quickly pulled you back up to face her and hungrily put her lips in contact with yours, licking at them, asking for entrance. her hands roaming everywhere around your body and 

soon enough, the tables turned and it was now her turn to let her tongue work wonders on yours as you felt like every nerve of your body reacted to the sensation. before you knew it, she was already pinning you to the counter, your back to her as her hands reached around your waist eagerly to pull down your piece of clothing. she kissed on the back of your neck and left her marks, and you knew she was smirking about it, too,

‘cause you felt it against your skin.

“you’ve had your fun, you’re gonna let daddy use that pretty cunt of yours now, right? that’s what i originally called you in here for, after all.” she whispered into your ear as she slowly slid her hand into your panties, middle finger gently caressing your swollen clit. she could tell you were ready for her, and it turned her on even more.

her dick, once again, gave it away.

and it hasn’t even been that long since she came.

sliding your panties halfway down to your knees, she didn’t waste any more time and carefully settled the tip of her cock under your dripping pussy, rubbing it against your wet folds. you slightly whined at the feeling whilst she breathed hot air against your skin. you needed to feel her inside you, your walls were literally clenching around nothing, and you couldn’t wait any longer.

“just put it in ryujin—“ you quietly pleaded,

“what was that? sorry, i don’t think i heard you properly.” she mocked, stopping her grinding movements altogether, 

which earned a small whine from you, “fuck daddy pleasee just—“ you exhaled upon feeling her hand grope your breast, then quickly added, “i need you inside me, please..”

she chuckled, satisfied with your answer, “good girl.”

immediately, she pushed you back onto the counter and slid her dick inside of you as she breathlessly groaned. you, on the other hand, were already arching your back and holding back moans. she started by slowly thrusting into you, before getting impatient and simply just pounding into you with full force. 

her cock was hitting places you genuinely didn’t even know she could hit, all you did know was that it felt heavenly. every hit of the tip pressed against the end of your cervix made you feel like you were gonna pass out. 

basically, the dick was good, it was so good that you had to be physically silenced to prevent your brother from potentially waking up and hearing the both of you go at it in the bathroom.

ryujin was the one that had to cover your mouth. not only did she cover your mouth, but she also pulled on your hair when you were being too loud (which kinda made you even more loud, but that’s beside the point). in a normal situation, she’d thrive on hearing you scream out her name and be this noisy for her, but with your brother in the other room? she couldn’t exactly afford to hear that, unfortunately.

pulling your hair back and making you face yourself in the mirror, she asked, “look at you, so slutty for my dick, so pretty, too.. don’t you think?”

and she was not wrong, your hair was a mess from her constantly grabbing it, your makeup was running all over your cheeks from the tears you’ve been shedding at the pleasure, your hooded eyes all red and swollen, your marked up neck, it was all so… filthy? you looked so filthy.

god you looked so hot like this.

you could only nod in agreement as you kept moaning into her palm, feeling her dick slide in and out of your wet pussy repeatedly, you were so close to climax that you could pass out—

the sounds of knocking on the door made the both of you flinch.

“y/n, i gotta use the restroom, are you almost done? i just woke up and i think ryujin left..? she isn’t here anymore and she hasn’t been answering my texts so i don't even think she’s home yet.” is what was heard from the other side of the door. 

what now??

you obviously wanted to respond to your brother but it’s not like ryujin even gave you the chance to, she just kept mercilessly pounding into you as he rambled and rambled. that is, until she pulled her hand away from your mouth.

was she actually expecting you to respond like this?? you looked at her through the mirror and saw her smirking at you with lust-filled eyes.

well shit!

you’d scold her later, now you just desperately had to think of a way to not sound like you’re getting fucked senseless. closing your eyes and mustering up all of the willpower to answer without your voice shaking uncontrollably, “y-yeah i’m almost done just give me a second i’m coming—“ was what you said.

and then your orgasm hit you like a truck when ryujin grabbed your waist and came into you.

quickly covering your mouth to muffle any sort of sound that escaped it, your eyes rolling back as you heard your brother mutter a quick “alrightt” before seemingly walking away from the door, not suspecting a thing.

thank god.

she slid out of you, the rhythm of her breath matching yours as you both tried to catch it.

god how lovely, you were leaking, you had hickeys every-fucking-where and now you had to think of a way to make ryujin flee the house without making it seem like she was in the bathroom with you.

this was gonna be tough to go about, especially with a fucked-out mind such as yours at that moment.

[yunnimilk]

could u do a fyodor with sub, gn reader with dumbification, overstim, biting and choking too with a red and white theme? (( something non canon, like him being a secret vampire priest or something of the like and reader is a devoted worshipper of his Church mayhaps..)) .. drabble, or full fic for me is fine eitherway!!

「 ✦ AMAB! DOMTOP! Fyodor Dostoevsky x AMAB! GN! SUBBOT! Reader

{ sorry it was a drabble, I started my second year of college so I had a lot of work to do }

DRABBLE !!

NSFW UNDER THE CUT!

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | Imagine being a membef at a church, you've decided to devote your life to god. Collecting donations and volunteering around the chapel isn’t anything new. Sometimes it was boring, but, this was the price to pay if you wanted to show your dedication to the lord , (^ε^)♪

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | The head pastor introduces a devilishly handsome man to you, asking you to tour him around the church buldings. The stranger had fairly pale skin with reflective dark hair that contrasted with it. Deep purple eyes that suck you in, you couldn't help but blush, which was embarrassingly evident on your face ! ◟꒰◍´Д‵◍꒱◞

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | His soft smiles take your breath away, your heart being pulled out of your chest. You take every opportunity to lovingly stare at his face, and you also got caught several times, but it seemed like he enjoyed your company !

ﾍ(≧▽≦ﾍ) ♪

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | he seemed off though, sometimes his skin would turn grayer and he would avoid mirrors. It's such a coincidence, vampires aren't real, you're being silly !

('A｀*)

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | But,,, one day, you found the man kneeling over, trying to hold his composure. Fyodor was sweating profusely as his fangs sharpened when you got closer to him, letting out a meekly, “f.. father ?”. He stayed still for a moment, his back was turned so you couldn’t see his expression . ( •́ㅿ•̀ )

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | Suddenly, he lunges at you! You barely had time to react, instead, you felt a sharp pain in your neck and a wet sensation going down your collarbone. Your eyes found Fyodor's head, him draining all the fluid out your neck. It was really painful at first, then it turned so electrifying, sending shivers righr down your cock . (•ө•)♡

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | Imagine Fyodor licking your neck and taking off your clothes, his moist tongue on your skin and you felt yourself getting harder and harder. Your soft moans encourage him to continue . ( ¯ ρ¯ )

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | Some time later and your head is buried in your pillows while Fyodor was plunging into you, sloppy and firm. Grinding inside your guts to make sure your prostate gets bullied by his cock, your body was so sore, from the bites and especially from Fyodor's relentless thrusts . o(〃＾▽＾〃)o

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | Your mind was far gone, everything was getting fuzzy and your cheeks were soaked from your tears, your tight, puffy hole making a squelching sound everytime he dug his cock into you. Your body stained from your cum and your blood, what a pretty painting ! ୧(-᷅ ہ-᷄)୨

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | He reaches down your neck as you let out a melodious whimper. Fyodor loves your pretty sounds, to him, it's the same as the church choir, so he's going to make sure you sing for him some more ! •﹏•

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | Your cock was so tired just trying to pump out semen, it was throbbing so badly. You begged Fyodor to have mercy on you, "P...plEASE! I- I don't.. I CAN'T.. c-c...come anymore! ~", he tugged your hair back, so you could look at him, "then release yourself for me, one last time, my dear", he went quicker to feel your walls tightening up ! ⚆_⚆

ׂ 𓈒 🍷 ／ ⋆ ۪ | Imagine your eyes rolling back as you felt euphoria coursing through your body as you stiffen up. Your hole squeezing Fyodor's dick, him grunting as his cum intrudes inside your guts ,

"I changed my mind, actually, let's go for another hour hm?"

[yuri-is-online]

Poor Idia, his mom probably saw the fanfiction he wrote of him and Yuu.

I love the image of Idia writing fan fic of him and Yuu and just maaaaybe changing the names so the non existent people reading it don't know who it's about. It saves his ego just that little bit. He could also just have a diary on his pc where he's written about his feelings on any number of things, not just Yuu.

Idia x Yuu is one I have a hard time writing since they don't interact much outside of events, but one of the things I have noticed from those events is that Yuu sort of has that "dog put in the enclosure to keep the cheetah from loosing it" vibe with him. He tends to be fairly normal-ish in his interactions with them and I like that. He doesn't have a real reason to think badly of Yuu (he even offers you some gummy worms in one voiceline) and I think he would be really thrilled to talk with a Yuu who was missing their shows and wanted advice on similar ones in Twisted Wonderland. I could see his diary entries reflecting a slow burn from seeing Yuu as just someone he talks to, to a genuine friend, to someone who he has overwhelming emotions for and doesn't know what to do with.

So he writes little fan fics set in some world or another where he can talk to Yuu normally and do fun little things. Sometimes you do normie stuff like go for coffee, but most of the times he writes about those adventures he fantasized about as a kid, just with a new party member.

[mouseymilkovich]

hii req for carm meeting nat’s baby for the first & reader realising she definitely wants a baby 😞💕

love love your works !!! thank u !!

TYSM!!! AND HELL YEAH BABY FEVER!! yknow for someone who never ever wants to get pregnant, i get baby fever sooo badly sometimes

also sorry carmy gets a little slutty at the end

⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆

"Oh, she's so beautiful!" You coo'd, trying not to be too loud as Carmy held your sleeping niece.

You weren't sure who was more nervous when Sugar got pregnant - her or Carmy. Of course, it was her body and her baby, but she was also an important part of The Bear, and Carmy was a fairly protective little brother, so he was freaking out about it too. That, and he knew you were likely to get baby fever the moment you two met your new baby niece.

Well, turns out, he was right. You got baby fever, crazy baby fever. Especially watching him hold the little baby girl, it sent so many swirling emotions in your stomach. It was oddly very hot seeing how well he handled a baby, but it was also so sweet, and it made you fucking long to have him just get you pregnant already.

Your visit was short, since both Sugar and the baby were tired. The moment you stepped into your apartment with Carmy, you looked at him with those puppy-dog eyes of yours.

"Caaaarm..." You murmured sweetly, putting your arms around him.

He smirked a little, and raised an eyebrow. He stayed quiet, though he was sure what you were going to ask.

"I think... I'm ready to start trying." You told him quietly.

"I fuckin' knew it. Y're predictable, baby." He chuckled, rolling his eyes.

You went to speak again, but you let out a yelp instead as Carmy scooped you into his arms.

"We can try on one condition." He muttered as he carried you to your room.

"Yeah?" You inquired.

"I get to fill you up as many times as I want til we get a positive test." He whispered in your ear, it sent a chill right down your spine.

"Deal."

[samkerrworshipper]

The Last Time (exile pt.2) | Alexia Putellas x Reader

part 2 to exile

summary: Alexia tries to apologise to r after what happened at the club… another songfic based off the song the last time by taylor swift

warnings: none besides a whole lot of angst :(

Alexia knows a lot of things. 

She knows how to play soccer, she knows how to speak English, Spanish and Catalan, she knows how to make some of the best paella in Barcelona thanks to her mother, she knows how to dance, she knows how to have some fun. 

She also knows that you are the best thing that has ever happened to her. 

It’s a fact, because Alexia was a mess before you, fresh out of a break up with Jenni, who she never really saw herself staying with but also never saw herself breaking up with. 

There are some people like Alexia thinks, people that you love, but they aren’t your person. Sometimes those relationships are the ones that hurt the most. 

Alexia knows that she’s fucked up more than she ever has before, she’s stripped you of your dignity and the respect in your relationship. 

Eli told her as much, her mother taking your side as Alexia sobbed into her phone explaining just how badly she had messed up and how she had to fix it. 

Alexia knew she was right, but she was also frightfully aware that she was fairly intoxicated, and she didn’t want to ruin your night anymore by showing up at your doorstep. 

So, she timidly stepped back into the bar, taking in how a lot of the team had exited the dance floor, Jenni appeared to be gone, something Alexia was grateful for. 

Before she could properly step into the space, Mapi was coming out of nowhere and clutching onto Alexia’s forearm, dragging her out of the club as quickly as humanly possible. 

Before Alexia could ask any questions, all the air was exiting her lungs as she was slammed up against the brick wall of the outside of the club. 

Mapi’s arm had come to rest flat against her chest, pressing her directly into the cold concrete. 

“What the actual fuck was that.”

Mapi’s voice is seething, and sure, she’s Alexia’s best friend in the entire world, but you are also Ingrid and Mapi’s adoptive daughter, when it comes to protecting you they do it fiercely. 

Alexia can’t do much besides burst into tears, she feels weak, stupidly weak, she doesn’t deserve to be crying, not after what she just did to you, but she can’t help herself, everything is too much. 

Mapi eases up a little bit, her arm falling from Alexia’s chest, down to her stomach and bringing her in for a hug, it’s clear that Alexia is pretty tipsy, and she decides she’ll save the yelling for when she can fully appreciate it. 

“C’mon, let’s get you home, Ingrid’s sober, she’ll drive.”

Alexia looks behind Mapi, to find her girlfriend lingering behind the two of them, a deep frown of anger and disappointment on her face. 

It makes Alexia sick to her stomach, like she’s been punched in the gut repetitively, she probably deserves it, especially after what she just did to you. 

She allows Mapi to lead her to a car, her body crumpling into the backseat, the thoughts of the last hour circling in her mind repetitively, like a record stuck on replay. 

Drunken, heartbroken Alexia forces herself to make a promise in the back of Mapi’s car, this is the last time. 

The last time she puts her feelings above yours, the last time she thinks without acting, the last time she disregards your relationship with such ease. 

If for some miracle, she can manage to claw her way back into your life, then she promises herself she will never let this happen again, this will be the first and only time that she goes behind your back, this will be the last time that she treats you like you aren’t enough, this is the last night she will lie to you. 

It seems empty, in the context, but Alexia doesn’t care, as far as she’s concerned this is rock bottom, this is the worst thing that has ever happened to her, and she’ll be damned if she lets you slip out of her hands without putting up a fight. 

Never again will she allow you to push your feelings under the rug, she is never going to hide all of your problems away like they don’t matter. 

When they do make it back to Ingrid and Mapi’s apartment, it’s clear Ingrid is fuming, Alexia can’t really blame her. 

So Mapi is on clean up, dragging a zoned out Alexia into the apartment, throwing her into the guest bedroom with some Advil and water on her bedside. 

It’s the bare minimum, it’s what Alexia deserves, Mapi doesn’t comfort her, she just gives her the look, the ‘you’ve seriously fucked up and I won’t lie to you about it’ look, it’s a look that previously Alexia had used on Mapi, before Ingrid, before Mapi got her shit together. 

She leaves Alexia to wallow in her hangover and depression, deep down Mapi knows it’s what's best, even if it hurts her, she knows from personal experience that sometimes it’s best to hold yourself accountable for your actions, and she knows Alexia will. 

Alexia manages to tug her clothes off, the items harbouring memories that make Alexia gag, she manages to crawl into the unfamiliar sheets of the bed and tumble into an alcohol induced sleep. 

It’s not a good sleep, the kind of sleep where no matter how long you stay unconscious for, you seem like you are teetering on the edge of waking up again. 

It’s why Alexia can’t sleep anything past 6am, which is her normal wake up time, on every day but a Monday, Monday’s are the one day of the week where Alexia allows herself to sleep in, because typically the only thing that happens on a Monday is video review in the afternoon, but that had been cancelled because Jona had some family commitment. 

She crawls out of bed, finding a spare hoodie and shorts on the dresser in the room and tugging them on before walking into the living room. 

To her surprise, Ingrid is already sitting at the kitchen table, a steaming mug of coffee in her hands, Bagheera in her lap and a laptop sitting on the counter in front of her. 

“There is coffee in the pot.”

Ingrid’s voice is stiff, something so unusual for the brunette, normally she is all things warm and kind, it’s why Alexia believes she compliments Maria so well, she mellows out all of Mapi’s bluntness and contradictiveness. 

Alexia tiptoes over to the pot, pouring herself a cup and then tentatively taking a seat at the table after Ingrid eyeballed the seat beside her. 

She closes the laptop once Alexia has sat down, all of the Norwegians attention turning to Alexia, unfortunately. 

“What you did last night was quite frankly disgusting. Your wife, my best friend, has put seven years of her life into you, you fall on her for anything you like, everything in your relationship is her problem, and for whatever reason she puts up with it, I know if it was me I wouldn’t put up with an inch of it, but she does, because that's who she is. She was holding on to one thing, you give away every single part of you, but she had something, a little piece of hope and last night you took it away from her. In fact, you practically stomped on that hope right in front of her. You don’t deserve her, you don’t deserve to walk on the ground that she does. I don’t care if you're my captain, or that you are La Reina or Alexia Putellas,  you do not get to treat the person that loves you very most in the world like a piece of lint on a sweater. You dust her off at every single opportunity you can, and she just sits by, allowing you to, because she loves you, a lot more than you deserve.”

Alexia tries to say something, agree with Ingrid, because she does agree, everything Ingrid is saying is true, Ingrid stops her though, continuing her rant. 

“For whatever reason, one I do not understand, she loves you, she talks about you like you created the moon and the stars, you make her happier than anybody else. That is why I am telling you that you have to make this right. Fuck Jenni, fuck you, fuck your fucked up ways. You need to fix this because she is going to be broken if you just give up. If anyone deserves to have their heart broken it’s you, so I don’t care if you have to die for her, you owe her that for all of the shit that you’ve forced her to put up with over the years. Last night might have been the straw that broke the camel's back, but you’ve been disloyal in every single way besides cheating up until last night, and if you love her at all, you will make it right. Nobody deserves to be loved more than she does, and if you don’t prove to her that you love her then she will spend every minute left of her life on earth gutted about it.”

Ingrid’s words are cut throat, so brutal that it takes Alexia a few seconds to absorb them all. 

“Ingrid, she told me that she wanted a divorce, that she didn’t want to be married to a woman who broke vows, I can’t blatantly disregard her wants.”

Ingrid just rolled her eyes.

“Of course she doesn’t, so prove to her that you aren’t that woman, that it was a mistake and that it will never happen again, and I swear to every single god that exists that if it ever happens again, mark my words, you will be six feet under and nobody will be finding your body, understood?”

It’s a threat that normally Alexia would find humorous, but the way Ingrid says it makes Alexia fairly certain that the Norwegian is fairly serious. Ingrid is innocent, Ingrid is a sweetheart, Ingrid is kittens and all things sweet and nice, apparently until you hurt someone she loves. 

“Do you know where she is?”

Ingrid takes a deep sip from her coffee. 

“I talked to Keira and Lucy last night, they took her back to their apartment, said she was practically catatonic and refused to speak to them, just cried and sat on their couch with Narla.”

It’s a sad image, the pit of guilt in Alexia’s stomach only seems to continue to grow the more information she’s fed.

“They live two blocks away from here, right?”

Ingrid nods hesitantly, with the confirmation Alexia is shooting out of her seat, rushing towards the door of Mapi and Ingrid’s apartment, Ingrid is far to tired and fed up with the whole situation to try and stop her, even with the negative feeling that’s pooling up in her gut, she figures Alexia is a big girl though, and if she’s going to make time to atone for her sins there's no time like the present. 

Alexia’s fast paced walk is fueled by one thing: fear. 

Fear she’s lost you forever, fear she’s made the biggest mistake in her life, fear that one stupid fucking kiss could be the end of her life as she knows it. 

It doesn’t take her very long to navigate her way through the Barcelona streets to Lucy’s apartment, Alexia and Barcelona are practically synonymous. 

She grew up on these streets, she knows them better than anything in the world, she knows them better than she knows you.

Which almost makes her hurl, at what point did her wife, her lover, her heart become somebody that she doesn’t know, when did you stop becoming her priority?

Find myself at your door

Just like all those times before

I’m not sure how I got here

All roads, they lead me here

I imagine you are home

In your room, all alone

And you open your eyes into mine

Everything feels better

Alexia somehow finds her way to Keira and Lucy’s apartment, she’s been her hundreds of times, team bonding, dinners, movie nights, coffee catch ups. Lucy and Keira are also two people who you heavily rely on, often Alexia’s innately grateful for the two of them, because she can always trust that whilst the two of you are separated for national duties that you are in good company. 

She knocks on the door, powerful, unyielding, confident. All things that Alexia is definitely not feeling. 

She waits a maximum of three seconds, before she’s met with a frazzled looking Keira, who is still dressed in her pyjamas and looks like she hasn’t slept a single bit. 

“Leave.”

Keira’s voice is scratchy, dry and weirdly fearful. 

“I need to talk to my wife.”

Alexia doesn’t know why she uses the honorific, she hardly ever refers to you as anything but your name, but it's some sort of safety blanket for herself, a reminder that technically, according to a piece of paper the two of you are still married. 

“Alexia, leave, she doesn’t want to see you and I don’t want you to get hurt when my girlfriend finds out you are here.”

Alexia grimaces at the thought of Lucy, who she knows will have far less restraint then Ingrid and Maria when it comes to defending your honour. 

She relents though, Alexia has walked out the door one too many times, she knows it, and she won’t allow this time to be just another time that Alexia’s failed to show up for you. 

“Keira, I won’t leave until I get to see her.”

Keira rakes her hand through the roots of her hair. 

“Look, she’s been torn up about what happened all night, didn’t catch a wink of sleep, neither did Luce or I because we were so worried that if we left her she’d jump off our balcony or do something stupid. I’m sure you didn’t sleep well either, so how about you come back tomorrow or something, when she’s feeling up to it.”

Alexia pities Keira just a little bit, it’s Alexia’s fault that she looks like shit, everything is Alexia’s fault. 

“Keira, please, I just need to see her, I know I fucked up, trust me, nobody knows it more than I do, I just need to see her, and apologise. You can kick me out afterwards, just please, let me say my peace.”

Keira’s jaw sets, and for a moment Alexia sees a different side to Keira, it scares her just a little bit. 

“I hardly think you deserve any of her time, you don’t deserve her time or forgiveness.”

Alexia is about to agree with Keira, but the both of them are silenced by a voice. 

“Kei, let her say what she has to say.”

And right before your eyes 

I’m breaking

No past, no reasons

Just you and I

Just the sight of you brings tears to Alexia’s eyes. 

There are big, puffy, red bags underneath your eyes, your makeup from the previous night smeared and mixed all over yourself.

You look so incredibly raw, like a piece of art, and it pains Alexia so much that she’s the reason for all of your pain, that her fucked up decisions have made you so broken. 

“We’re waiting.”

Alexia’s brain snaps into order, all of her thoughts circulating as she tries to articulate what she needs to say to you. 

This is the last time I’m asking you this

Put my name at the top of your list

This is the last time I’m asking you why

You break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye 

You find yourself at my door

Like all those times before

“Please, I know I fucked up last night. And it’s not the first time that I’ve put myself above you in the last little while, and you deserve better, you deserve so much better. But I do love you, I loved you enough to marry you, I loved you enough to make you a Putellas and I don’t regret that. I don’t love Jenni, I don’t want her, I don’t think about her like I think about you. I know, I broke your heart, a heart that I promised I would protect, that I’d care for. I know that I’ve asked too much of you, asked for you to forgive me of too much, you deserve better. Please, let this be the last time, I promise, I swear on my mothers life, that if you give me a chance, I will make this the last time. I know we’ve been here hundreds of times, and you have no reason to trust me, but please, give me a chance.”

Your facial expression doesn’t change, it’s spacey, sort of like you’re on a different wavelength.

Alexia’s toes are scuffing against the doormat, her hand resting on the door frame as she looks at you, with tears and desperation in her eyes. 

“Little while? Alexia the last time you told me you loved me when it wasn’t for cameras or show was two years ago. When we took the trip to Ibiza before your break out season started, as soon as the award started rolling in, I didn’t matter, how could I? I didn’t marry La Reina, I married Alexia Putellas Segura, the woman who loved me, you aren’t that person anymore.”

You wear your best apology

But I was there to watch you leave

And all the times I let you in

Just for you to go again

Disappear when you come back 

Everything is better

“Please, Y/n/n.”

Your face is unwavering, and for once Alexia doesn’t feel weak for being the one breaking down, it feels deserved, considering how many times the tables have been turned and you’ve broken down in front of Alexia because of her words and actions. 

“No, you do not get to show up here with some perfect fucking apology to try and worm your way back into my life. It’s not fair Alexia Putellas, because you know I love you, you know that I would follow you to the ends of the earth, you know that I would give up every single part of myself for you. But I have watched you walk out the door so many times, and every single time I’ve let you back in, I’ve let you disappear whenever its been most convenient for you and act like everything is fine when you return. I put up with that, because I am a good fucking wife and I love you, more than is healthy. You are my everything, you are my world, and I would have died knowing you didn’t love me as much, because loving you was enough for me. But knowing that you loved Jenni enough to give her something so sacred to me, it felt like you ripped my heart out of my chest and cut it to pieces in front of my eyes. The worst part is, I still fucking love you, you could kill a hundred people or move to Antarctica and it wouldn’t matter, because I love you, unconditionally and it hurts. So please, for me, walk away, because if you don’t I’ll forgive you, and then you’ll worm your way back into my life, and it’ll hurt even more because I’ll be going against my beliefs and wishes.”

And right before your eyes

I’m aching 

Run fast, nowhere to hide

Just you and me

Suddenly, tears are dripping down Alexia’s face, it hurts so bad to hear what you are saying, it feels like she’s being stabbed. 

Having you hate Alexia is one thing, but having you love her but ask her to leave is the worst possible thing. 

Alexia wants to runa way from the door, to leave you, leave this awkward fucking situation which Keira is directly in the middle of, but she can’t, not when your staring at Alexia like it’s physically hurting you to do so. 

This is the last time I’m asking you this

Put my name at the top of your list

This is the last time I’m asking you why

You break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye 

“Please just let this be the last time, let it be the last time I fuck up, let this be the last time I hurt you.”

Alexia’s voice is pleading, begging, hoping. 

“Sure, this is the last time you hurt me, this is the last time, because there won’t be any more times between us, we’re done Alexia.”

This is the last time you tell me I've got it wrong

This is the last time I say it's been you all along

This is the last time I let you in my door

This is the last time, I won't hurt you anymore

Alexia is balling now, big, wet, fat tears sloppily falling down her face as she processes the emotions and current conversation. 

“Alexia, it’s been you all along for me, and I was okay with that, even if it was painful, even if you could never reciprocate. But this is the last time I open my door to you, this is the last time you hurt me. So leave, please, don’t make this any harder than it has to be.”

Alexia’s feet feel rooted to the floor, her toes curling into the doormat below her feet. 

“Alexia, leave, before we call security.”

It’s Lucy’s bigger body, now shielding you from Alexia that sends the order, and before Alexia can say anything more, the door of the apartment is slammed in her face, and she’s left standing in front of a white door, with tears streaming down her face as she mourns her marriage that’s slipped out from under her, all because she was fucking stupid. 

[nymph-yoongi]

affection w/ yoongi

Word count: 703

In general, I think Yoongi is not a very public person when it comes to affection. Not because he’s embarrassed of you or anything, but just because he can be a pretty private person

The most common way for him to show his affection for you around others is holding your hand. Yoongi loves holding hands with the people he’s close to, including his group-members and he loves the way your hand fits against his

He’ll occasionally sneak a kiss to your hand when no-one is looking, but not very often unless the two of you are alone

The most common dates you guys have are nap dates

We know Yoongi loves to sleep, and he feels much more rested after sleeping beside you

It’s fairly common for him to call you over to the studio and the two of you end up napping together, even if that wasn’t why you were originally there

And if he’s working too hard, sometimes you’ll go over there just to talk him into getting some rest (which is never very difficult) 

That being said, anyone who knows him can see his love for you very clearly 

He shows it in more silent ways and most people might not notice it, but it’s there nonetheless

Yoongi is the type of partner to make you food when he knows you haven’t eaten that much today, even if you insist you don’t need anything. Having been a part of the industry he’s in, he knows how easy it can be to convince yourself you don’t need food and refuses to let you slip into the same habits he’s seen fellow idols slip into

He also loves making you little handmade gifts

We’ve seen him make gifts for ARMY by hand, and I feel like that bleeds through into your relationship with him as well

Anything he sees a tutorial for that he thinks you’d like, he’ll make for you. He always finds a way to make it unique because he wants his gifts for you to be one of a kind. Sometimes he’ll make a collection of them for when he has to travel and can’t take you with him, hoping to alleviate some of the loneliness that he knows comes when he leaves 

He also likes getting you small gifts that remind him of you. It’s not always something expensive, though he definitely enjoys being able to dress you in nice clothes and jewelry. Oftentimes he’ll get you little charms or sometimes books that you’d like. If there’s anything you collect, he keeps an eye out for them when he travels; he doesn’t buy souvenirs for you unless you get to go with him, but he always finds something that will make you smile 

I think, though most people would miss it, the easiest way to see how much Yoongi cares about you is just in the way he looks at you whenever you’re around

You’re the first person he looks to when someone (usually Jin) tells a silly joke, and the first person (outside of the other six) he goes to for opinions on his songs once he feels like they might be how he wants it 

Other than that, he just loves seeing you. With his busy schedule and tours taking him away for a long time, then his military enlistment, he tries to engrave your face into his memory for when you’re apart . You tease him for it a bit when you catch him just smiling slightly at you, and he just smiles his gummy smile at you. “Why wouldn’t I stare? I love you”

Yoongi loves handholding in public, but he loves your kisses in private too

A leftover habit of yours that still means a lot to him is when you started kissing his shoulder before he’d had surgery on it 

You were one of the first people that knew what had happened to his shoulder and how often it hurt badly enough to limit his movement. You always helped him manage the pain, kissing it “better”. It didn't fix his shoulder, but it did make him feel better to know that despite everything he’d been through, you loved him all the same 

[tokyo-daaaamn-ji-gang]

just like you did the baji one, can you please make a draken relationship headcanons??

Sure, here are some Draken relationship hc's!!!

It takes him so long to confess to you and even after he does, he sometimes struggles with verbally telling you his feelings. Gestures are definitely his way of showing love.

Very protective, will throw hands for you

He tends to be a bit overprotective too, texts you fairly often to check that you're ok when the two of you are apart.

Is very enthusiastic about showing you his bike and hopes you'll be interested in it. (Badly wants to take you on a ride)

Offers to teach you a few self defense moves

All of his friends know who you are and your relationship to Draken. They like to tease the two of you sometimes (but will also happily protect you in any troublesome times).

Also be prepared for the girls at the brothel to be very interested in Draken dating someone. Even if he's moved out by then, word gets around. 

Brings home a lot of little surprises for you like your favourite snack or a magazine he thought you'd be interested in.

Likes to walk with his arm around you

One time he catches you wearing his work uniform, he never tells anyone how much he liked it/ how good he thought you looked in it.

You and Emma are actually fairly good friends, she was sad to end up with Draken but is ultimately glad he's happy.

Practices things like saying he loves you to a photo of you, even practices his proposal this way (Mikey offered to pretend to be you but Draken said no)

Everyone notices how Draken smiles a lot more when you're around

[maximwtf]

“Fret not, all will be well.”

Xianyun x Reader

Words: 2k

Google Docs Pages: 3

Warnings: chronic (joint) pain but I guess the mentions are very brief, could just go as a sickfic, hurt/comfort angst you know the usual. Mother is mothering

Opening: Having been Xianyun’s disciple for years, you finally move to the harbour. Though, trips to Mt. Aocang to see your master started to feel like a chore after your body started to ache. Word of this pain spread to her unknownst to you. This making the adeptus seek you out. 

AN// Reader can be any gender! Oh no, is that another very self indulgent fanfic I see?! Yes. But these help with the bane of my existence so I might as well keep making them. This also gives me a chance to learn how to write for her, because I’m a firm believer that more content of her is needed :”D. I found her way of speaking hard to follow up on without hearing her talk constantly, so I apologise if any of her lines seem off. 

I proof read this fairly quickly, so any mistakes are on that.

“Fret not, all will be well.”

After years of studying the adeptus arts with Cloud Retainer, you moved back to Liyue Harbour. Got yourself a comfortable house to live in, and built your new life around there. From time to time you would still visit the all too familiar mountain that your master ruled. You’d sometimes bring in notes and greetings from Shenhe and Ganyu whenever they couldn’t find the time in their busy lives to visit the crane. An overall nice set up you’d gotten yourself into. 

You couldn’t deny that the scenery along the way to Mt. Aocang was also beautiful, bringing you joy as you made your way each time. As rough as the trip from time to time was, it was always worth it in the end. You could tell the visits delighted the adeptus living alone, bringing her peace of mind to hear that her disciples were doing alright. 

Though as of recent, you had found it hard to make it all the way to her. Body aching badly enough to not even make you dare to try. You began giving your regards to Cloud Retainer through Ganyu or Shenhe instead, staying home and working as you’d usually. Though, as much as you had hoped otherwise, the condition seemed to worsen over time. 

But even with life getting harder due to the aches, you couldn’t find it in you to complain. After all, you lived comfortably and didn’t feel the need to bother anyone with this. Maybe even still hoping that this would eventually pass. That having been one of the main reasons why you hadn’t told Cloud Retainer why you stopped visiting her like you’d done in the past. 

But even with the hopeful mindset, you had to admit to yourself that doing daily tasks had become more challenging. You'd already taken a few days off work to rest, but that hadn’t helped as much as you had hoped. Your form ached just as much each morning, having to find the extra courage to get up and prepare breakfast. 

So in hindsight, the fact that the news of your worsening condition had spread shouldn’t have been as much of a surprise as you’d taken it as. Especially with how close you were with the people around you. Them figuring out something was wrong was no surprise. 

Though, you didn’t notice any of that happening. Being busy enough with keeping your daily routines together. 

And that was exactly what you were doing this morning. Sitting up from your bed with muffled groans, eyes tired from the lack of sleep. With a yawn you attempted to gently stretch, wiping your eyes to maybe rub away the exhaustion behind them. You didn’t know if it ever actually went away at this point, but you stayed hopeful. 

As normal as this morning had been so far, it was going to turn upside down soon enough. And that happened as soon as a knock echoed from your front door. It alerted you, chasing away the last bits of sleep from your mind as you took a hold of your nightstand to stand up. 

You stumbled with the first few steps, cursing to yourself silently before shaking the nagging attitude off for whoever was at your door. With a deep breath you tried to pull something that resembled a smile on your face before opening the door to see who was on the other side. But that facade of a smile soon fell when you saw your master standing outside, patiently waiting for you. 

Your eyes widened for a brief moment, trying to quickly collect yourself as to not embarrass yourself in front of her. “Good morning, master.” You began, watching as her keen eyes looked around your house quickly before landing on you. “May one come in? Perhaps join you for breakfast?” She asked, a polite invitation with a clear hidden meaning. But who were you to decline her offer, after not being able to go and see her yourself for such a long time. “Ah, of course. Come in.” You mentally sighed, stepping out of her way as she walked through the threshold. 

Her feather-like clothing swayed smoothly as she made her way to your kitchen, seeing how messy it looked. You cringed at seeing the dishes you’d avoided cleaning, knowing it would put a strain on your body and even the thought of that felt unwelcoming. But it most certainly was not a good look for you in her eyes. But she was kind enough not to mention it, hiding the scowl mixed frown from her face before turning to you. 

“Word of you got to one, making one wish to come and see you.” Xianyun said, seating herself on one of the chairs gracefully. You didn't know what she was talking about. Not having any memory of talking to Ganyu or Shenhe about yourself, you weren’t so sure what she’d heard and from who. “I’m afraid I don’t understand what you mean, master,” you replied before turning your back to her in an attempt to prepare tea for the both of you. Still fully listening to what she had to say. “One heard you had fallen ill, thus making you unable to visit.” She said, voice observant as she watched you gently. You cringed at the explanation, assuming the people around you must have spread the word around. “Ah, I see. Well, worry not for I am perfectly fine.” You hummed, taking a hold of the cups with a low hiss. You hadn’t had the time in the morning to mend yourself into a better shape before making something to eat. So these tasks hurt to do, but there was no way to explain this to Cloud Retainer in simple means. 

But perhaps you didn’t have to explain. The hiss and careful movements must have been enough for her to form a deeper frown on her face once more. “One does not recall teaching one’s disciples to lie, hm.” She said with a huff, some offence in her tone but you knew it wasn’t serious. You were more worried when you heard her stand up. You swallowed hard, turning to see her after placing down the cups. “One may not know every mortal illness, but that does not mean one is blind.” She continued, placing her hands to her hips. You weren’t sure what she was looking to gain from this, drawing in a deep breath. There was no way out of this with her. You’d have to explain what had been going on. 

You leaned on the kitchen counter, looking away from her as you collected your thoughts. “Well, I wasn’t necessarily lying when I said I was fine. It’s merely some joint pain.” Cloud Retainer gave you a look, tilting her head a little as if to point to the mess in your kitchen. Not to even mention the rest of the house. “Well- It may or may not stop me from doing certain tasks sometimes, but it honestly is nothing to worry yourself over.” You sighed, not sure if you were trying to defend yourself or make her worry less. “One does not worry themselves, one merely came to see where you had been,” she huffed but after reading her expression it wasn’t hard to tell that she was only keeping up appearances with the comment. She had come here for exactly what you accused her of, worry. 

There was no getting through to her. You sighed, shaking your head gently before giving in. “Very well. It hurts enough to have stopped me from climbing the mountain to come and see you. And maybe it also affected the appearance of my living space.” You huffed, turning your eyes to her form, giving her a strong ‘you happy now?’ look. And in return she gave you a moment of deep silence before crossing her arms over her chest. “Words of comfort are not one’s strong suit, but allow one to prepare the tea for you. We shall sit and talk after.” She said, and without another word you understood the look she was giving you as ‘go sit down’. And that you did with no further complaints. 

You abandoned the kitchen, not wanting to sit in silence in the same space as her as the water slowly boiled. So you retreated to the nearest couch, huddling up on it to the best of your ability. You’d figured a while back that sitting with your legs criss crossed or straight were the only two pain free ways of sitting. So, choosing to cross your legs, you waited for your master to come back. And whatever entailed when she did.

In no time the sound of her heels alerted you, the sound getting closer and soon a warm mug was placed on the table in front of you. Xianyun herself sat on a stool you kept under the table, crossing her legs. 

Taking a hold of the mug, it warmed up your hands. Not even having noticed how cold your hands  had gotten, it felt nice. Bringing it up made the steam hit your face, but it wasn’t too hot, making you confirm that the tea probably wasn’t too hot not to drink. So you took a sip, holding back a wider smile at the taste. It reminded you of the tea you used to have with her back when you’d just started as her disciple. The teas she made had a specific taste that you couldn’t chase whenever you made it. At some point having started to believe that perhaps it was the effect that happened when you ate any food someone else had made. It just tasted better. And so did the tea she prepared, bringing back pleasant memories. 

But that train of thought was interrupted as she spoke up, placing her mug down gently. “One had time to ponder on your condition. One believes there may be a stronger medicine one could prepare for you in order to relieve the pain. One also feels the need to remind you, that one is always here for you. You need not but reach out.” She spoke, a sense of comfort in her words which somehow managed to embarrass you. 

You gulp down the rest of the tea, placing down the mug to reply to her properly. “You need not do that for me, if it’s any trouble-” You started, but she raised her hand slightly, shaking her head. “Nonsense. One wishes to help, it is no trouble. So fret not, all will be well.” And the way she managed to word everything out brought a sense of comfort that overpowered the embarrassment. Perhaps she was correct, all would be well if you had someone helping you. So you agreed with a nod. “Alright. Thank you, Cloud Retainer,” you added, a tired yet grateful expression on your face. 

A short, rather awkward silence fell upon the two of you. As if she wanted to say something but wasn’t so sure how. “Hm, as eloquent as one may be, there is not much more I can say. So allow one to tidy up here and you take a rest. One will wake you up in due time.” She requested but truly there was nothing you could say to protest against her. She was going to do it regardless. “You really do not have to,” you mumbled while laying down carefully, reaching down for a felt. You groaned lowly at the action, shoulder not giving out enough to unravel it. “One does not feel obligated to, fret not.” She replied, even as rhetorical as your silent comment had been. But almost as if automatically while speaking, she’d gotten up enough to unravel the felt for you before turning towards the kitchen. You blinked a couple of times at her action, not mentioning anything of it as you huddled to a more comfortable position. You’d thank her once you woke up again, was the last thought you had before the sleep you’d been losing recently caught up with you. 

[leidensygdom]

Just a bit of a personal thought, but I have grown to deeply dislike how social media, with its' competitive algorithm and need to have a perfect performance, is often giving people a really wrong idea of what is it actually to do art.

Most times, artists are rewarded by posting only their best work: A badly performing post in places like Instagram may affect how well your next post performs. It also prefers you to post finished pictures, very presentable sketches, that kind of stuff. Which is rarely the bulk of an artists' work. Even speedpaints have been chewed down into palatable videos barely reaching 15 seconds. Tiktok and Instagram reels prefer extremely short videos, and speedpaints are mostly just few (sparkles) aesthetic (sparkles) shots of minuscule parts of the process.

And all of that, I've found, gives people this really weird image of what is art actually like. A lot of starting artists grow to make idols out of bigger ones, thinking that these people can only create perfect pieces effortlessly, but that's not how it works. Very far from that. It's mostly that artists that keep active social media and have grown to know the game, know that showing the rough parts of art is not what gets you favoured by the algorithm.

I've been thinking about this ever since I saw a video on twitter of a fairly long speedpaint for what you usually see in social media, I think 4 minutes long, where the person redrew portions of the sketch up to five times. And a lot of people mentioned it was enlightening to see the struggle, to see that even a competent artist sometimes will struggle doing a little phone cord for an hour.

I think that's something I have kind of experienced, too. I'm not a big artist, but a lot of people have mentioned they find me intimidating still, up until they know me on Discord or something and realize I'm just a goof like any other. Up until I mention a face refused to work for 2 hours and I gave up, or how I randomly keep learning new basic functionalities in my drawing software of choice. And I think that's crucial to share too: Art is not a linear road! It isn't a smooth trip! You'll fail again and again and sometimes will end up going back to a previous point, then take another path. Sometimes you render a whole drawing and decide it looks bad so you start over. Sometimes you realize the lines came out wonky as hell and end up redoing it. Sometimes you gave a character 6 fingers or forgot people have eyebrows. It happens! And it's part of what making art is!

I mentioned this on Twitter- I rarely have visible proof of these struggles, but for an Artfight drawing (where I am trying to be speedy), I struggled with a cloak. For long. I made a thumbnail, I made a sketch, realized the cloak didn't work out, so I redrew it over and over again. I deleted most of the discarded sketches, but here's a few of the things that survived.

And like, I'm tired of not talking about this! I'm sad that people think they're failing because their art process isn't as smooth as it could be! So, yeah: I guess rant over, but I just have been thinking about this a bunch lately. If you'd like, do please feel free to reblog or share in replies any similar situations, struggles and flops. I think it could help people to realize how this is actually just a natural part of the process.

[azurlily]

Hi idk how full your inbox is but I’d like to ask for Makima with a  Chihuahua like reader (short and agressive and bratty basically) could it also be nsfw also thank you

Woooo! I've been thinking about this one for a bit. Makima is just like the perfect person for a brat, you cannot tell me otherwise. I made this sort of toxic because I honestly believe that any relationship with cannon Makima is gonna be fucked up in some way. If yall want non-toxic just say that in the request.

Makima x Bratty!Reader NSFW

"Do you enjoy you life, little red? Do you enjoy the things I buy you and the way I treat you?"

Makima enjoyed asking rhetorical questions a lot, especially when she was mad. That usually means you had to make her mad first, and despite her calm demeanor: it's fairly easy to anger her. A few snide comments here, a few too rough arm pulls there, maybe you decided to play around with Power or Denji.

In the end, you fucked up in some way, you fucked up so badly that she's completely lost it. Although...you enjoy that dont you? You enjoy when Makima has to grab you by the neck and practically hurl you into another room. You love when her hands find their way up your skirt; it's a warning, it always is.

Makima is by no means a kind woman. In fact she's the complete opposite of kind, she's mean, harsh, rough, and fucking cruel. Makima us a naturally sadistic person -not with everyone, you just fucked up somehow and she knew you were the one.

Now that you think about one of the subtlety not so kind things shes done is give you a nickname. "Little red". To her it's a way of making fun of you. You're easy o annoy(not that she isn't either because of you) and you face gets red when you're mad. The "little" part is solely because of your height, she enjoys reminding you every so often.

"If I pull out the gag will you respond the right way?"

You were essentially being told to watch your fucking mouth, or else. And you, ever the fucking idiot: didn't think twice when the ball gag was taken out.

"I thought you'd be angrier, I guess you really have gone soft, Miss Control Devil."

Oh, now you remember how you got here: you continued to run your mouth after she gave you two strikes.

The first strike was because when Denji told you that Power let him grope her. You very loudly said, "Wow I wonder if she'll let me do it too?!"

Of course you wouldn't, you're not Denji, you value your and Powers too. That was all it took though, you knew Makima was watching, she was always watch you. And when you were called up to her office and told to sit in a corner, and help her do paperwork for an hour you wonder if you made the right choice.

The second strike was not long after, you decided you were thirsty and begged Makima to let you grab a drink from.the vending machine downstairs. After you were pleading for ten minutes: she relented.

You practically ran downstairs, but once you were down there you realised you were alone. You remembered that there was a nice coffee shop not too far from here, she wouldn't mind if you got her something right? You went straight to the coffe shop, you knew by now there was something watch you. Not that it mattered!

"Maki! I got you a drink-please don't be mad!"

Were the first words that left your mouth once you walked in, and as you set the drink down you felt a small warmth in your stomach. That look, she's mad, not pissed but you're sure as hell in trouble...maybe. And of course that look turns you on, she looks so fucking hot when shes mad. When she looks like she wants to eat you alive.

If there was one thing in the relationship between you two that you hated it was your beight difference. Makima isn't all that tall, and yet you're right at chest level. Sometimes it's hot, sometimes it's fun. Other times you remember just how fucking intimidating she can be.

"Hey...so y'know I never noticed how tall-"

"Strike two. Give me the drink and get back to the paperwork."

You put the drinks down and feel a hand on your arm, Makima gently pulls you closer. Until you're in her lap and your head is pressed ever so gently to her neck. You smile when you feel her kiss your neck, at the end of the day you matter most.

"Do you enjoy patronizing me? Or are you mad because of the. . .Denji thing?"

That's what you labeled it, and you refused to refer to what she's doing as anything else.

"Oh no, I mean give him all the attention you want. I was talking to Quanxi though-"

That did it, you were flipped over and slammed into the part of the desks without the drinks on it. You could feel the murderous intent coming off of her.

"Really? Her. Is she the hill you wish the be killed on, little red? I can assure you it will happen if you keep this up."

You tried and failed to turn your head, instead just giggle like a little girl.

"Oooh, is she a threat to you or something? I mean she and her girls are hot but-"

Makima flips you over so you're facing her, if looks could kill you'd be dead thrice over. You smile, this- this is what you needed for days. And finally she's giving it, finally.

You open your eyes, coming back to here and now.

Yeah that got you dragged onto her desk. You feel a hand wrap around her neck roughly; she's doing this to test you limits. Makima presses her body against yours, she looks at you for a few moments. Finally taking time to admire her handiwork, you look so fucking beautiful.

A red-ish orange rope was wrapped beautifully around your skin, the rope held your hands and arms back as well as wrapped around your tits. You weren't naked, but seeing as you were in a nice set of lingerie Makima buys for these occasions, you aren't exactly dresses either.

Within it all you were originally wearing a red ball gag that was now covered in spit. And the best part? A small, ruby red plug was set inside your ass. And of course a small bullet vibrator that Makima had set to one, although now she's regretting not just leaving it on five and walking out.

"Every. Single. Fucking. Time. I think were making progress, and then you go a do this. At this point I feel inclined to ask: do you enjoy being punished?"

You knew the answer just as much as she does: fuck yes. Makima wants to hear it, she wants the words to leave your tear stained face. C'mon say it for her, wont you?

As you begin to answer, Makima turn the vibrator up to three. Oh, she wants you fucked.

"Y-yes!"

Makima looks down with a smile, she's enjoying this past sexual gratification. She enjoys seeing you so dependent on her, so needy. And despite how much you act out: you'll be in her bed each nice. So it doesn't matter anyways.

"Yes what, little red? I need specifics."

Oh this bitch.

"F-fuck you, you can't make me say shit!"

That did it for her. Makima backs away slowly, her hands going to her temples. She looks back and you and then the clock in the room, she has a meeting and an hour. That's plenty of time to handle this. But before that-

"What's your color?"

"Green."

One word, yet it completely determines how this hour will go.

"Good girl, good girl. If only you could respond this swiftly all the time."

Makima takes a few things from her desk: a bigger vibrator, a blindfold, and a strap-on.

"Remember, what happens next is your fault, little red."

I'm sorry it's not great, I just wanted to finish this as soon as possible!