#something which does what I need it to :D if I asked shop staff they’d probs just try sell me anything .. expensive 😂🥲

[glasseswearingrabbitdetective]

How to find a decent iPad which’ll hold all my games and be able to read manga WITHOUT DYING (any time soon…) :,) looking at apple website is just @u@ words ads “apple is god! :D” not helpful GKAKVKA reviews hard too so many… many iPad types .. help?? Recommendations?? SOME of the games I have coughhoyoscough would def be moved to iPad … so it NEEDS to be able to survive the latest 3D/heavy games .. I kinda wanna put project sekai on it too so not tooo big??🤔🤔

[joezworld]

sooo... pip and emma headcanon?

So, I had to put some thought into this one - behold my result. 

The Princess Dragon and The Dragon (better known as Pip & Emma)

There are few ‘true’ siblings on the railways - engines not only related by class and proximity, but also age. Sodor has three such sets - Donald and Douglas, Skarloey and Rheneas, and Pip and Emma.

They were close from birth - they were built right after each other, numbers 43017 and 43018. They were outshopped the same day, and each were the first locomotive they saw once ‘born’.

‘Close’ does not begin to begin to describe the two. From their introduction to service in the 70′s, they were kept as a pair, working trains all over BR’s network as a matched set - where one went, the other followed. Attempts to separate them in order to meet trainset needs typically ended poorly - both units operated well below norms when alone, and often exceeded those same norms when together. By 1983, a notice had been put into BR’s computer system to ensure that they wouldn’t be separated.  

Such close proximity is nothing new to engines (look at Donald and Douglas), but with Pip and Emma there was a new twist:

Ask most diesels about being a trailing unit - one that is controlled by the lead engine via Multiple Unit (MU) controls - and they will say that it’s a necessary discomfort. (To sum up many different opinions: It feels weird, and not in a good way. )

Because the HST sets were supposed to permanently run ‘top and tail’ on their trains, BR did design them in such a way as to make MUing more comfortable, and most class 43s have no strong opinions on being MUed.

The key word there, is most. 

Pip and Emma - who had spent most of their lives connected to one another in just about every way, including mechanically - began to exhibit some form of telepathy with each other as early as 1985, and by the early 90′s had basically stopped acting as two separate entities. 

While they remained two (interconnected) minds, they became basically one body - totally aware of what each other was seeing and feeling at all times. 

[They can also sense each other’s thoughts, but wisely have kept that on the down-low, and have said little on exactly how close they are.]

-(They’re totally drift compatible, btw)-

-

Now, after decades of basically living in one another’s heads, the sisters are capable of sensing each other even when disconnected, which has caused no small amount of shock for bystanders when one of them is in for maintenance, and the other one is miles away on a train, but they’re still talking to each other.

-

They originally gained nicknames back in the late 70′s, when a cracked exhaust manifold caused Emma’s engine to roar loudly at idle. Pip’s somewhat demure attitude at the time quickly gained them the nickname of “The Princess and The Dragon”. 

This nickname lasted almost three whole years, until Pip learned what a dragon actually was, decided that they were much more exciting than princesses, and began referring to herself as ‘the dragon’ as well. Emma, being an enabler, agreed with her sister totally on this point, and the two of them essentially gaslit members of staff at BR into believing that they had always been referred to as “The Dragon and The Dragon”. This nickname has stuck ever since - including after their move to Sodor, but nobody on the Island knows why they’re called that, so it doesn’t get as much use unless they’re feeling quite ornery, at which point they become insistent on being called by their “titles”.

Also, in the 1980′s, some true Agent of Chaos in the Western Region taught Pip how to growl and roar like a “real” dragon. Naturally this meant that Emma learned that skill as well, and the ‘Dragon Sisters’ have occasionally expressed their frustrations by roaring into the night when they think nobody is around. 

On more than one occasion, this has absolutely scared the living daylights out of some poor shunter parked just out of sight.

(It’s a ridiculously accurate sound too, and isn’t helped at all by both sisters having seen ‘jurassic park’ enough times to be able to mimic the t-rex’s roar. When coming out of two little express engines, this sound can and has startled bigger engines off the rails)

-

Moving to Sodor happened in the 90′s. The newly independent North Western Railway wanted a diesel express service for running into London, and The Fat Controller (the Third) found an agreeable pair of West Coast Main Line HSTs in London. 

That agreeable pair was promptly killed less than a week later in the Southall Rail Crash, forcing Stephen Hatt to go back to Great Western Trains for a different set. 

GWT, now down a pair of 43s, wouldn’t sell him any more, which forced him to go to GNER, where he found Pip and Emma, who jumped at the chance to go back to the strange island full of steam engines that they’d visited before. 

Their arrival on Sodor doesn’t go perfectly, as some engines who shall remain nameless *cough cough* Oliver, Douglas. *cough* are still opposed to new diesels - *for somewhat* understandable reasons. (It’s 1998 guys - stop stereotyping. They’re not all evil.)

However, Pip and Emma really don’t help avoid suspicion when they intentionally act “evil” and “scheming” whenever certain engines are about. 

BoCo and Bear, who are always down to psychologically torment idiots, get involved too, and the prank goes wildly out of hand when everyone on Thomas’ branch line (except a very unamused Daisy) starts panicking about ‘soul stealing, mind reading, red-eyed, diesel electric monsters!’

The prank is eventually brought to heel after an embarrassing incident at Kellsthorpe road station involving tinfoil, Annie, Percy, and one of the engines from the Electric Branch. The Fat Controller - once he learns all the facts and can speak without laughing, is merely glad that Pip and Emma are integrating well to the railway.

[Note - this does totally ignore RWS book 42 “Thomas and his Friends”, which states that Pip and Emma arrive on the island in 2011. This is because that book is dumb. The last time any main line engines are mentioned in the RWS before then is in 1995 in “Thomas and the Fat Controller’s Engines”. There is zero reason for the NWR to have waited almost 20 years to buy an HST set. It makes no sense. Also, it ruined a very good Railway Series fanfiction on the Sodor Island Forums, which had to be taken down because it defied continuity. So I say they showed up in the late 90′s. Deal with it.]

-

In 2007, Pip pleads/threatens the paint shop staff at the works, and gets herself and Emma a Christmas present: A giant, fire-breathing dragon painted on both of their cabs. The works’ paint shop staff consists of a bunch of guys who customize old cars in their free time, and a bunch of young apprentices who play D&D in their off-hours. The resulting Dragons are some of the most amazing vehicle art ever applied to something that isn’t a 1970′s Chevy Van, and actually win several awards from hot rod magazines. 

More concerningly, the dragons do not appear to be stationary, as multiple pictures taken by trainspotters show the dragons on different parts of the engines at different times. Pip and Emma have not been asked, but one can assume that the Dragon Sisters might have more than just flashy paint, they may actually have real dragons now. 

[therestismutlol]

Leverage • Xiaojun x Reader (Part 1)

You’ve just got to use Xiaojun for revenge.

***

Chaeyeon.

She’s one of the headaches you tend to get every single minute. The fact that her seat was always ‘coincidentally’ close to yours was not helping.

You didn’t intend to hate her this much, but you do. Maybe it’s because of the way she rolls her eyes at you every single time she meets your eyes. Maybe it’s the cruel way she had spread rumours about you around last semester. Or maybe it’s because she’s just unacceptably pretty, rich, and talented because how could she have all those when she has an awful personality?

Anyway, you just despised her even more when she bumped into you purposely in the hallway this morning. It was on purpose, you were sure, because you saw her smirk then head her way. You swore to yourself the next time she tried to pick a fight with you, you’re more than ready to wipe that irritating smirk off her face.

Today was like any other day. You had planned to have something after your afternoon classes at the university’s café, then drop by the library to study a bit more. Today though, you’ll also drop by to get your roommate Kun the books he pleaded you to get for him, then go to your shared dorm and get some sleep.

4 o'clock in, you’re seated in your usual table near the window in the coffee shop, relaxing jazz music playing in the background. You’ve always wanted to change the music because it seemed like you’ve already memorized when the piano comes in and out and where the climax will happen, but you need to be part of the staff first, which was another responsibility you are not ready to take on. So you forget all that and just thank all the Lords out there jazz was playing, and not screamo music.

“Dahyun, hey,” you smiled once you saw your friend enter the shop and come to your table.

“Hey,” she breathed, then slumped to the chair opposite to yours. “I ran a mile just to catch up with you.”

You giggled.“You’re exaggerating. Anyway, what are you doing here?”

She raised a brow at you, and fished something out of her pocket and put it on the table. You widened your eyes as you closed your laptop.

“My phone!” How come you didn’t notice it gone from your own pocket?

“You left it in class, airhead.” Dahyun rested her chin on her palm, elbow on the table. “It’s a good thing I was the one who found it first. Did you know that for a second, Chaeyeon was about to pick it up too? Too bad I was nearest.”

You groaned.“I’m so stupid! If she was the one to pick it up, she’s going to find something to blackmail me with and ruin my life!”

“Again. That girl’s set on ruining your life.”

“One (favorite/drink).” The server came to your table to deliver your order. You smiled at him, and he warmly smiled back before returning to his place.

“That guy’s pretty cute.” Dahyun swooned right after, eyes lingering to the counter where he was reaching for napkins from the drawers.“How come I just saw him?”

“He’s a dance major. I believe his name was Yukhei.”

“And here I thought I knew everyone in this campus. Why do you know him?” She pouts.

“He’s a friend of my roommate, Kun. Comes over sometimes.”

“You’re so lucky. Introduce me to him sometimes, will you?”

“Sure,” you shrugged, before reaching for your (f/d) but Dahyun was quick and reached for it first. You gaped when she took a sip from it, because you haven’t even touched it yet!

“Hey! That’s mine,”

“Who cares? I have hot tea to spill.”

You rolled your eyes at her attempt on changing the subject, before reaching for your phone to put it in your backpack’s front pocket.

“It’s Chaeyeon,”

You groaned.“Who cares about that bitch.”

“Hear me out first!”

You glared at her, but her stare was unwavering. She grinned.

“She’s currently obsessed with someone.”

Obsessed with someone? Well that was enough to pique your interest. Chaeyeon was that arrogant ass who never showed desperation for anyone, because usually it was the other way around. Why would she, when she could get whoever she wants wrapped around her finger? So you wondered why, this time, her pride was nonexistent. Was she really?

“I’ve heard from a lot of my girl friends that she’s been hanging around him for three months now. She also keeps giving him gifts every. Single. Day. Could you believe that? I couldn’t believe it because how could she, but then I just saw her give him a small box earlier with my own two eyes. It’s pathetic.

"Also, I’ve heard from her sister that one time when the guy told her to stop bugging him, she stormed to his dorm and made a scene. First, banged on his door, then camped outside the whole night. When morning came she threatened to jump from the building if he doesn’t come out and apologize to her, and so he did and she stopped.”

You couldn’t hold in your laughter. She looked like a complete idiot, you wished you were there when it happened. How come you didn’t know any of these?

“Holy shit, that’s hilarious. Are you sure though that he isn’t her boyfriend, or ex? Because she seemed too emotionally attached.”

“I swear to God, (Y/n), she’s deluding herself and is currently spreading around that she and him are a thing, when, repeatedly, he has been rejecting her and shuts down everything that has to do with her. Poor boy. She’s really that obsessed.”

“Okay, but with whom?” You badly wanted to know now, because surely, it had to be someone really handsome or rich or popular for her to be at his mercy.

“Xiaojun. You know the guy from public speaking class? It’s him.”

You slowly raised your eyebrows. “Xiao…jun? Xiao Dejun?”

“I’m not sure, but I think he really is Xiao Dejun.”

That Xiaojun?

…That was kinda shocking. Was it really him?

Xiaojun was, indeed, a student you frequently see in public speaking class. You don’t notice him often, because he always sat far from you and you just didn’t care, and usually, he’s with his set of friends. And by set of friends, you meant Kun, Yukhei, Ten–they often hung out in your dorm, since Kun was your roommate. This is why you’re a bit familiar with him, but you were never close. Sure, you’ve once played a videogame with them, but that was it. All of your interactions with him are casual.

Sure, he was cute. But he seemed too plain for you. Just what did Chaeyeon find in Xiaojun that made her go nuts for him?

“She’s out of her mind."You breathed out.

"She’s just starving for love and attention. Well, I couldn’t blame the boys if they didn’t wanna date a girl like her, because same. She’s so problematic.”

“For easy sex, how about that?” You retorted, words laced with hidden double meanings, and Dahyun smirked, understanding.

"Well, I mean, if that’s how you put it. She’s great at that.”

“As expected from the campus’ whore.”

You both shared an ugly cackle. You usually felt bad for talking about another person badly, especially in public, but because it was Chaeyeon, you actually enjoyed it. So much, you just wanted everyone from the coffeeshop to hear your conversation.

Four hours have passed and you found yourself frowning once you close the door of your dorm room. There were loud male voices that were clearly not Kun’s coming from your spaces.

Kun seemed to hear you arrive, for he approached you in the doorway with an apologetic smile.

“The boys are here again. Do you mind?”

“Not at all,” you shook your head, removing your shoes to place them at a corner to wear your fluffy indoor slippers.

“They’re playing online games again.”

“I figured.”

When the three boys saw you, they greeted you before ultimately focusing on their online game.

“Hey (Y/n).”

“What’s up?”

“It’s us again.”

“Yeah,"you answered, looking at Xiaojun who smiled before getting smacked at the head by Yukhei.

"What the fuck dude!” Yukhei hissed.

“What did I do?” Xiaojun groaned, rubbing the spot that was hit on his head.

“You’re so fucking stupid, oh my god.”

“What did I do?”

“You got distracted,"Ten chuckles.

You couldn’t help but let out a chuckle as well.

"Anyway, (Y/n), I cooked dinner for us. Let’s eat dinner while these guys mess around.”

Dinners with Kun were always the best. Well, if it was him cooking, of course. Unfortunately, you cook on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays–good thing today was a Tuesday. Even though no one asked, the boys said they’ve already ate so they wouldn’t share your food, like always. Well, it really was the right thing to do, because they’re already messing around in your dorm room, it would be another story if they had the audacity to beg for the food made only for you and Kun.

In short, you thank the heavens for having Kun as your roommate, and not anyone else.

You’ve handed over the books Kun asked you to pick up at the library today, and he thanked you by letting you use the shower first. Once you were done, Kun followed, while you now lingered in your place, at the top bunk of the bed.

You wanted to sleep, but the problem was, the boys were still there.

They were noisy as fuck. Even if you couldn’t sleep, you couldn’t study either. It’s already ten, you wondered if they really cared about their classes for tomorrow because it doesn’t seem like they’d be leaving anytime soon.

“Get him Dejun, get him!”

“What a fucking loser!”

Their shared laughter was what propped you up to your elbows as you looked down at them from the top.

Their eyes were glued to the screen, focused. They were obviously sucked into the game, not giving a single care for everything around them–well, not everyone, because apparently, someone felt your eyes bore at the back of their head.

Xiaojun looks up, and your eyes met.

He then instantly switched his attention from you to the game.

Xiaojun…

He suddenly intrigued you.

This was the guy that Chaeyeon was so head-over-heels for. The guy that could, if he wanted to, make her do anything he wants, and the only guy you think who could do so.

Does he realize the power that he currently has? You think not. He just seemed too oblivious. You don’t know. You don’t want to assume but that was the vibe that you’re getting from him. A guy that was nice.

You frowned, then subconsciously bit on your thumb, deep in thought.

Judging from her past relationships, you thought Chaeyeon was into guys who were either assholes or womanizers, as long as they looked good, is popular, or has them money.

But looking at Xiaojun sitting on the tiled floor in his wrinkly knitted white sweater and washed denim, you couldn’t expect anything. You seemed like you were underestimating him too much, but you know. There are a lot of guys out there. Even just in this room. There’s Yukhei who’s obviously hotter…and definitely a player. There’s Ten, who’s known by everyone in and out of the campus because of his reputation of being the best dancer. You couldn’t compare him to Kun though, because they share the same energy– but putting that aside, why him?

Why…him?

Something was definitely wrong with Chaeyeon.

The next day, you were a bit eager to go to classes just to collide with Chaeyeon because of the newly-obtained information you have.

You waited patiently for public speaking class to come, and once it did, your eyes searched for her.

And there she was, entering the room while keeping up with Xiaojun’s pace. She kept talking and talking beside him, and Xiaojun just nodded everytime. When he got to his seat, which was at the farthest left of the room, you saw Chaeyeon open her bag to fish out something. You winced in an attempt to see what it was, but because of the distance between you, you still couldn’t see what the hell it was but you assumed it was one of her gifts. Xiaojun accepted it without a word, like it was the norm(which really is), putting it in his bag. You snorted at the sorry sight.

Chaeyeon then came to sit on the row in front of you, two seats away, but of course, only before she threw a glare to your way. Classic Chaeyeon.

You almost jumped in shock when someone tapped your shoulder. It was Dahyun.

“My god,”

“Hi,"Dahyun smiles, "I thought I wanted to sit with you today.”

And so she did. But of course, you knew that meant you’re not going to pay attention to class anytime soon, because she turned to you, and whispered lowly.

“Did you see Chaeyeon give Xiaojun something today too?”

“Of course. It’s so pathetic. I wondered why I haven’t noticed this before.”

“Right?” Dahyun giggled. “Anyway, I investigated a little bit about him.”

Your professor was rambling on and on, but it seemed like it was only a background music for the two of you. You cared more about what your friend was about to say, even though at this point you shouldn’t care, but you’re so curious it’s probably going to kill you.

“Xiaojun is friends with Kun!”

You scoffed. Of course you knew that already.

“What?” Dahyun frowned at your reaction.“Don’t tell me you already..?”

“Is that the only fact you know about him? Nothing else?”

“Well… I’ve talked to one of his friends too, Ten? You know Ten?”

You nodded. She pouts.

“Why do you know so many things? Unfair,”

You know that she’s pissed because she was Dahyun, the one who has all eyes and ears in the campus. She has Intel everywhere– first one to know anything, so she breaking known news to you somewhat damages her reputation. But can she blame you?

“I don’t. He just comes over with his friends to play videogames in our dorm room because of Kun.”

“Oh. You must’ve talked a lot then.”

“We haven’t talked.”

“Okay,"Dahyun nodded."I bet you haven’t heard of this, then. As I was saying, I’ve talked to Ten, and they were classmates in Highschool. Said Xiaojun was the student council president and was always on top of his class. Everyone loved him, he was really popular.”

You raised a brow on her.“Really?”

Not like you didn’t expect it, because he definitely looked the part, but still.

“And, there’s more,"Dahyun gave you a smirk."Did you know that Chaeyeon was a classmate of theirs, too?”

Your jaw dropped.“What? Really?”

“Yeah. And this one’s the best. Chaeyeon wasn’t this bitchy before. According to Ten, she was wearing braces and thick-rimmed glasses.”

You gasped.“What the actual fuck?”

“Right?”

You and Dahyun looked at the woman who was the star of your conversation simultaneously–you could only see the back of her dyed-to-blonde hair, of course. Chaeyeon seemed to be listening to your professor intently.

“This woman has the guts to bitch around when way back in high school, she was a nerd? Unbelievable,"you scoffed.

"Right,"Dahyun tilted her head to the side."And to think that she’s had a past with Ten and Xiaojun, dammit,”

Your eyes then wondered to Xiaojun, who, like Chaeyeon, is currently listening to the lecture and typing down notes in his laptop.

You still haven’t gotten them off your mind hours later. You’re currently at the coffee shop, at your usual table, with your laptop opened. Only this time, you were on FaceBook digging in Chaeyeon’s profile. You wanted the pictures. You wanted her pictures where she was once that unpopular freak that she always bullies nowadays. You wanted to use it against her. If only the Lords had let you.

“Dammit, she deleted it all,” you frowned once you reached the end of her gallery. None.

“(F/d),”

Your eyes met Yukhei’s once again as he places your (F/d) on the table, but you didn’t bother to return the smile he gave. You were just too frustrated to the point the next person who greets you would surely get smacked.

But you were not the one who was greeted.

“Dejun!”

You blinked at the mention of the familiar name. Did you hear it right?

You looked up from your laptop and saw it was Ten who entered the coffee shop, and the one who said the name. He approached the seat that was two tables across you, where a man with a black face mask sat, busy typing with his computer prior.

The man pulled down his mask to his chin, revealing his grin. “Ten. What’s up?”

“I’ve been looking for you all over the place! Good thing I called Yukhei, says you were here.”

“He’s always here,"Yukhei answers, carrying a cup of coffee to their table. "Every single day.”

“Except Sundays and Saturdays,” Xiaojun corrected, taking the cup of black coffee and sipping from it.

“Except Sundays and Saturdays,"Yukhei repeated.

You couldn’t believe it.

You’re here every single day too, except Sundays and Saturdays.

You see this man across you every single day, probably studying too, but you just didn’t pay attention. How could you recognize him when you couldn’t see his face? He’s either wearing a black mask like today, only revealing his eyes and eyebrows, or he’s wearing a cap or a hoodie.

Turns out it was Xiaojun all along?

"Anyway, I came here to tell you that we’re going out tonight. Wanna come?”

“Mmm, where?”

“The nightclub, of course.”

There was a look of hesitation in his eyes, and he opened his mouth to speak but he was cut off by Ten.

“Don’t be such a fucking pussy and just come.”

“I’m not a 'fucking pussy’, Ten, I’ve got exams tomorrow.”

“You always got something due tomorrow!” Ten whines.“There would be a lot of hot chicks, I promise.”

“Not interested.”

“Oh right. When are you ever interested? You’re not even interested with Chaeyeon, and that girl has a hot bod.”

Xiaojun was silent. Ten continued.

“She practically begs for you to sleep with her every single chance she gets and you don’t even budge. What’s wrong with you? Don’t tell me you’re more of an MILF guy?”

“I’m not."Xiaojun looks at him, distaste evident in his features."Can you just shut up already?”

“For all I know, he’s gay."Yukhei comments from the counter.

Wait. That actually makes sense.

You blinked, then hid your face in your hands, as if you’re caught eavesdropping in their conversation. Your eyes widened so round it was like you’ve put in the final piece to a puzzle even if there was no puzzle to begin with.

What if Xiaojun was gay?

Oh my god, Chaeyeon would be really hurt about this. You let out an excited squeal, but then froze. You were too enthusiastic about your new found information you couldn’t control yourself. What if they heard you?

You raised your head to see if anyone caught on to that but it seems like they were too bothered to even notice you.

But now, Xiaojun was glaring at Ten.

"I just don’t have anyone in mind at the moment, and unlike you dumbasses, I actually respect women.”

Yukhei and Ten exchanged glances before they laughed.

“Whatever, dude,"Ten stands up then heads for the door.

"We respect women too, but by making them feel good."Yukhei says while raising his brows suggestively."We love women.”

“Too bad Dejun can’t relate,” Ten laughs one more time before opening the door and leaving.

Xiaojun pursued his lip into a thin line, seemingly defeated. He then looked around to see if anyone has heard their conversation, and that was where you got caught. His eyes met yours.

He immediately put his mask back on before slumping on his chair then started typing quite aggressively on his laptop, but the mask wasn’t enough to hide his redenning ears.

You couldn’t help the corners of your lips from rising.

***

Lecture Hall C was still half full and your prof hasn’t arrived yet when you sat down on your usual seat. You yawned, before resting your head on your table. You just wanted everything to end just to crawl under your covers and hibernate.

It’s because you couldn’t sleep last night.

You’ve thought hard, but you just couldn’t think of a great plan to break the news to Chaeyeon.

Do I just write on a piece of paper saying Xiaojun is gay and pass it around class?

What if I crawl into Ten and Yukhei’s pants just to dig up more information about him to post into social media anonymously?

But you didn’t want to risk too much for yourself. Also, nothing seemed to be that amazing of a plan, everything was either too boring or used countless of times in movies.

“I’m here again,"you heard Dahyun cheekily say as you felt her presence beside you."Let me copy from you, I know you reviewed our lessons.”

“Great."you sighed exasperatedly, sitting up straight.

"Okay, I have something to say.”

You knew once Dahyun started talking, she wouldn’t stop, and that meant distraction so before she could even tell the story she’s about to say, you whack her head with your notebook.

“Ow… What the hell?”

“Shut up.”

“But I haven’t even said anything yet!”

“Shut up!”

“Let me talk!”

“No!” You whack her head again with your notebook, and she gasped.

“How dare you??”

She wrestled the notebook out of your hand to prevent you from hitting her again, and once she finally did, she planned revenge. She throws your notebook at you, but you blocked it with your arm and so it flew further back.

Dahyun gasped. You widened your eyes. Somebody was hit.

You turned around to look at the most unfortunate person.

Xiaojun was caressing his forehead, his left hand clutching the notebook. He first glares at the notebook before looking around to look for the one who did it. You immediately looked the other way back and froze, hoping that you don’t get suspected. The last thing you want was a confrontation today!

But the people near you guys(or at least the one who saw) were making it hard for you by starting to say 'oooohs’ and other teasing remarks accompanied with knowing looks and smirks, which you reacted at badly. This is so embarrassing!

Your first instinct was to look around and see if Chaeyeon saw.

She didn’t. She was at the front row, reviewing lessons from her laptop. You sighed almost dramatically in relief.

And then you hit Dahyun again, with your fist on her arm, to which she squeaked at.

“Stop hitting me!”

“You’re such an idiot! Get my notebook back!”

“Alright, alright! I’ll get it back for you."she held her hands up in defense from your fighting stance."I’m sorry, okay? I’ll get it back, just don’t hit me!”

“You better.”

“Even though I shouldn’t be apologizing because you hit me first…”

“What did you say?”

“Don’t hit me!"she immediately answered.

***

The class has ended. You still let Dahyun copy from you by using the pencil case technique where you put a piece of paper of your answers in your pencil case then pass it on to her where she pretended to look for something for the past hour, all done without raising suspicion.

Dahyun stood up, but you hadn’t forgotten. You held her wrist tightly, making her flinch.

"What now!?”

“My notebook.”

She blinked. Then grinned shyly. “Oh. Yeah. I almost forgot.”

You rolled your eyes on her, before releasing her wrist.

“Wait here."she says, but before she could even take one step away from you, a voice had stopped her.

”(Y/n)?“

You turned to the voice, and saw it was Xiaojun’s.

And he was holding up your notebook.

You and Dahyun reflected the same terrified expression.

"Y-Yes?”

“This is yours.”

It wasn’t a question, it was a fact. This was the only time you regretted writing your name on the front page, at the back, at the side, then at the cover.

“Yes, it is,” you stood up then walked to him.

“She threw it at you!” Dahyun suddenly blurted out, and you turned to look at her, gasping.

You immediately turned to the male in front of you.“I did not!”

But his unreadable expression was making you doubt yourself too.

“I swear on my life I didn’t, Dahyun did!”

“She did it on purpose!”

This woman–

“It’s okay.”

Your plans of strangling Dahyun was cancelled, and you blinked at Xiaojun, who run a hand through his hair.

Your unconvinced expression made him crack an assuring smile, before handing your notebook to you.

“I said, it’s okay.”

You accepted your notebook, but still doubtful.

“Really, it’s okay. Accidents happen.”

He gave you two one last smile before going out.

You stood there, looking at his retreating figure until you couldn’t see him anymore.

“Looks like I didn’t have to get your notebook for you after all.” Dahyun says, walking to your side.

And your reflex was to hit her again on her head with your notebook.

“Ow!!”

“You fucking b–”

***

The stay at the coffee shop was mundane as always.

Of course, because of the commotion earlier, you couldn’t help but look for Xiaojun, but you couldn’t find him.

A thought even wandered in your mind. What if he just had a concussion? If you damaged his skull? Is he dead?

But you knew you were overthinking things. He probably just went somewhere and you shouldn’t really try to know because in the first place, it wasn’t your business. So you resumed reviewing, but you were off today. You couldn’t focus on anything and your mind just wanted you to catch some Zs, so you decided to wrap it up and leave 45 minutes in.

As if seeing your childhood best friend, Nancy, on the way to the dorm wasn’t surprising enough, there came another by the time you arrived to your dorm.

You entered silently, setting your shoes first at the doorway before putting on your fluffy slippers. You yawned, mind about to drift far away, until Kun’s voice brought you back to earth.

“Just tell her that you like her.”

You frowned. Like what? Like who?

“It’s easy for you to say,”

Hey, isn’t that..?

You didn’t want to assume, but you’re positive. But just to make sure, you creeped slowly until you’re at the end of the wall beside you, then bent to sneak a glance on the two people talking. Are they just two people?

They were.

Kun was sitting comfily on his swirly chair, while his friend sat on his bed, chin resting on the pillow he was hugging close to his chest.

You were right.

“It’s easy because I had the courage.”

“I don’t have the courage!” Xiaojun says.

It was really a surprise to see him here. He wasn’t at the coffee shop earlier because he was here all this time?

“Why not though? I mean you’re obviously so into her.”

Into who?

Xiaojun went silent. You frowned. Her? So it’s a girl. He’s not gay? But who the hell was it?

“If you don’t do it, I’ll do it.”

“Don’t.”

“…Okay.”

What if he’s finally into Chaeyeon? You shook your head. No way. That’s just bullshit.

“I mean because what if she rejects me?”

Okay. Totally not Chaeyeon.

“Rejects you? Well who knows, but I know her. She’s chill.”

Kun knows her?

You couldn’t help but grin in excitement. You were about to know something really useful to hurt Chaeyeon! She would really be devastated once she knew about this, so devastated she might actually just hole herself up in her room the whole year–

“She’s chill, but I’m still worried. I think everytime I’m around her I become a huge idiot. What if she thinks I’m such a loser right now?”

Are you hearing this right? Xiaojun belittling himself? You cocked your head to the side. He’s this nervous, maybe it’s because he’s a little inexperienced with things like these. Well, you couldn’t blame him, he was so into his studies. If anything though, he doesn’t look stupid at all, he’s just boring.

“You are if you don’t tell her what’s on your mind.”

Xiaojun just sighed at Kun’s advice.

Your heartbeat seemed to quicken a bit in excitement. Who? Who is it? Why don’t they just say the name already?

“Let’s not… Talk about this anymore. I’m getting stressed.” Xiaojun falls into Kun’s bed face down, making Kun laugh.

“Okay, whatever.”

You wanted to scream in frustration. What the hell?

You were this close. This close. But they just had to drop the subject?!

You just wasted your time. You wanted to get out and get some fresh damned air.

You turned back, removing your bunny slippers, then wore your shoes once again.

“(Y/n) (L/n) will be the death of you.”

“She really would be.”

W–

You tripped, but still managed to regain balance when you held on the door’s doorknob–but you still hit your head on the door, causing a commotion.

“Who’s there?” Both the boys asked as you heard them make movements. You cursed under your breath.

***

Part 2 ->

[dukeofriven]

[Note: this post originally appeared in this thread. Owning to Tumblr’s inability to update reblogs with edits because it is a hellsite programmed by a secretive cell of former Stasi operatives to avenge the fall of East Germany, it has thus been re-edited and reformatted here for your reading pleasure.] JK Rowling’s wizards are the most useless, lazy, incapable dumbfucks in the history of fiction. The average Muggle? You take away their technology and they would be able to complete the basic tasks of feeding and clothing themselves without shitting on the floor. If a wizard ever lost their magic in Harry Potter, though, they would die. They’d be dead in three days. They’re garbage and I hate that I’ve come to hate Harry Potter - a series I once loved - because an author inexplicably hailed for her world-building is daily revealed to be appallingly bad at it. I realize this is a really dumb thing to be this angry about but I’ve been told for years what a great world-builder J.K. Rowling is, and that was not even true when the books were coming out. The Time Turner ruined all of Harry Potter forever, not because it offers easy time travel you can hold in your hand (although it does), not because you ask ‘why don’t they just use the time turner’ with every subsequent scenario forever (although you do), but because it was an enormous, flashing red light warning everyone that the series was going to attempt to make the transition from Fairy Tale Logic to Serious Fiction logic and fail. Badly. Really, really badly. I still think Harry Potter & The Philosopher’s Stone is an almost perfect book: a distillation of decades of boarding school genre fiction combined with magic, friendship, and wonder. It is a book that owes as much to Enid Blyton and L.M. Boston as it does to C.S. Lewis or T.H. White and other authors with two first initials. Its sense of place is magisterial, from the frumpy, soul-crushing suburban sadness of Privet Drive to the ephemeral curio-shop wonderland of Diagon Alley to Hogwarts itself, a bastion of astonishment, homeliness, and delight. What it isn’t is the sort of framework on which you can support the horror that is the torture and murder of Charity Burbage in front of her colleague Severus Snape, who could not rescue her because he could not break his deep cover as a spy against Wizard Hitler 2. Long-running series can experience changes of tone and complexity. This is neither something laudable nor worth reviling; it’s a neutral phenomenon. Sometimes series do it well: Susan Cooper’s The Dark Is Rising and Terry Pratchett’s Discworld are both series that by-and-large end with books focused on far more complex issues than their earlier entries. TV series do this too: contrast the early episodes of Steven Universe or Adventure Time with episodes from later seasons. With Adventure Time, for example, trying jumping from the pilot to Remember You and see how hard you get tonal whiplash) Lois McMaster Bujold sublime space opera The Vorkosigan Saga doesn’t just change tones but also genre: space adventure, murder mystery, political thriller, goofy regency romance, comedy of errors, heist movie, schizoid identity crisis - on and on. The latest entry in the series has almost no plot to speak of, but is instead a musing on age, gender roles, grieving the loss of a lover, and the hope of new life. Some series, however, manage the transition poorly, largely because the initial tone cannot be harmonized with the later tone (Mass Effect jumps immediately to mind). But Harry Potter has more than just a problem of its tone getting darker: its trying to have darker events fit in the same world in which people can walk around with names like ‘Mundungus,’ the Hogwarts school song can be a nonsense poem, and the Philosopher’s Stone was defended with a series of video game puzzles. In a world in which the villain openly tortures somebody to death, the Philosopher’s Stone shouldn’t have any whimisical bullshit about its magical defences: it should have trip mines in the floor and an enchanted statue with a gun, because Voldermort isn’t a guy you confound with drinking potions and flying keys. You should just kill him. The charming fairy world of wonder of HP & The Philosopher’s Stone has room for a love potion. The later books, in which it is revealed that Voldemort was essentially born from rape, is not place where Ron Weasley can hand-out a book to Harry called Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches without seeming like a predator in the making. The cradle that is The Philosopher’s Stone cannot hold a beastly baby like Deathly Hallows any more than Grindlewald pontificating about the superiority of wizards can sit comfortably in a universe in which wizards took until the 18th century to accept the outhouse! Not that fascist ravings are inherently logical; but even non-fascists in Harry Potter never act like wizards are anything other than 100% better than muggles at all times. They can’t, because if the series were ever to do that it would have to acknowledge that the two worlds are different: neither better, just different. Instead - well, as Ron once bitched, magic makes coffee perfect every time, so it’s not clear how muggles stand being alive and don’t just roll-over and die from the hellacious half-life that is living with imperfect coffee. This has nothing to do with irony, a suggestion that ‘oh Grindewald talks a big game about wizardly superiority but wizards didn’t use toilets and cal themselves goofy names like Flumpus MacFludgeon: Rowling is using dramatic ironic to lampshade how wizard supremacy lacks self-awareness. No: this is about a world that is silly being asked to host a genocidal dictator and his crimes. It’s like those tedious ‘grimdark’ AUs that always show up in bad fanfiction by authors attempting to be serious: what if the Sesame Street gang had to deal with ICE, what if Po started haemoraging while hanging-out with Laa-Laa, what if Peppa Pig learned that she was adopted and her real parents were brutally murdered as part of gang war because they were heroin dealers and so on. (The best skewering of this edgelord comedy is still probably either Andrew Hussie’s Muppet Babies/Saw comic or any encounters the Shortpacked staff ever had with the Transformers: Buckets of Blood guy.) In Harry Potter, Rowling built a wonderful little fantasy world that ran happily on the logic of fairy tales and fairy stories, and then decided she was never going to be taken seriously as an author unless she introduced Hitler to the equation. And it never works for her. It’s not like it couldn’t have worked. The Lord of the Rings is famously a very different book from The Hobbit. It did, in fact, introduce Hitler into a little fantasy world but Tolkien made it work by abandoning huge portions of the Hobbit’s tone, style, and structure: he wrote a completely different book.  Frodo isn’t scarfing-down Bertie Bott’s Every Flavoured Beans on the slopes of  Mount Doom. The moment, say, Cedric Diggory lay dead in Harry’s arms, we needed to never meet Mundungus Fletcher ever again, or Weasley’s Gooftacular Prank Nonsense, or Ron getting Harry a book about love spells. All the very least that needed to go away, at least until the very end, because Rowling is not an author with the skill to keep the silly and the sublime on the same page. That’s fine in and of itself: all artistic people have strengths and weakness, nobody is skilled at every element of creation. J.M. Barrie was very good at writing a book about an eternal child, but a bit crap at writing a biography about his mother. Arthur Sullivan spent his life quietly seething no one wanted to listen to Ivanhoe instead of The Mikado. There’s a reason Jerry Lewis never released The Day the Clown Cried.  Virginia Wolfe is a great writer, but that doesn’t mean she would have written a great run on She-Hulk. [Although now that I’ve said it I can’t think of anything I want to read more.] There’s a great bit in the Lord of Rings after the Shire has been scoured of Saruman where the Hobbits essentially open-up their larders and allow people to have fun again; there’s also a nice bit slightly earlier where Great King Aragorn puts on his old Strider clothes just so he can be his D&D character again: when series change tone, unless you’re really good at walking on a knife’s edge, the quieter, gentler, lighter world isn’t gone forever, but it does have to go away for a while: which means its time to tamp-down on the people with silly names and personalities - like Slughorn, who slips into book six like the second-coming of the vain and silly Lockhart, even though that’s the book where Dumbledore dies.

Rowling keeps trying to makes her old tone fit with her new world without having to pull a Tolkien and actually write differently, which produces moment after moment of tonal whiplash in which the latest Potter-related movie literally involves referencing the holocaust but she also drops some fun trivia about wizards shitting on the floor like animals. (You could describe the entirety of the first Fantastic Beasts film as Tonal Whiplash: The Motion Picture. I’d say that’s an essay for another day but I do not want to have to watch that movie again.)

It needs to be said that a primary reason these tone shifts ‘don’t work’ for Harry Potter is that the logic of a fairy tale is different than the logic of a mundane story. The logic of a fairy tale tends to be self contained: it doesn’t have a smart ass running around asking questions like ‘why’ because there is no why; a thing is the way it is because it is the way it is. Fairies steal babies on the third Sunday of every month, and nobody in the story asks ‘well what about in countries that use different calendars, and what about the shift from Julian to the Gregorian calendar that skipped eleven days?’ because such a pedantic question has no substance in a fairy-tale world. The Clever Child might question what the fairies need with babies, but she’s not about to break-down the week-to-week investment metrics on the Fairyland Infant Exchange. It’s not that one cannot critique or bring critical thinking to fairy stories; it’s that in a fairy story you don’t ask how the sewer system works because it’s not pertinent to what the story is trying to convey. It’s being the guy at the book club who is mad nobody wants to discuss his theories on the music of Rush: its not that the theories are bad, it’s that in this time and place they are of limited relevance. Harry Potter, however, does not belong to to the world of fairy stories, but to the legacy of Tolkienesque fantasy - the world of

  In The Hobbit nobody would ever ask if Hobbiton had sewers - it’s not important, and if you ask those kind of questions expecting there to be a serious answer of grave import you’re being a twit. Lord of the Rings, though? Not only is it a valid question, but Tolkien probably wrote a paper explaining the etymology of the Westron word for ‘sewer’ and how sewers were first invented by Shítlívær the Noldor as a way of helping the Blessed Isles cope with all the crap that tumbled out of Fëanor’s mouth.

The world of The Hobbit is one you could enter and expect to quickly find yourself on an adventure. The world of The Lord of The Rings is one you could enter, walk-about, and study without anyone ever exepecting you to solve some sort of regionally-disturbing social problem: in short, it wants you to be invested in the existence of its world in a different way than The Hobbit. Even then, although The Lord of the Rings is more grounded than The Hobbit, it is not so grounded that it doesn’t leave room for mystery, and questions that refute Wittgenstein’s assertion that all questions must be answerable. Tolkien loved to create complex worlds, but there was stuff he knew wasn’t worth elaborating on. It’s really his fans and authorial heirs who developed the somewhat worrying belief that a good worldbuilder has to have an answer to literally every question or else didn’t think their world through. (This has killed more potentially good books than bad cover art ever has.)

The Lord of the Rings leaves room for The Undiscovered Country. Harry Potter wants too… but can’t. Firstly, Rowling obviously understands the need for what we might call poetic mystery - like the gateway in the somewhat unsubtly name Department of Mysteries - but she also wants you to know how wizards pooped three hundred years ago. You get the feeling she knows exactly how and why that gate works, and what it is, but she withheld the knowledge because she likes mystery’s aesthetic more than she ascribes to any idea that an author might have lacunæ in the knowledge of their own work. That is, she would never put something into her work that she didn’t have an answer for - for her there is no undiscovered country that exists beyond the knowledge of even the author; she is an omniscient deity. Not for her is C.S. Lewis’ insistence that for her characters: All their life in this world and all their adventures had only been the cover and the title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before. Rowling knows exactly what happens to every one of them from the moment they were born to the moment the rot in the ground and the day-to-day schedules of their lives in heaven. Secondly - and far more of an issue - is that Harry Potter becomes a world that invites you to pick up each part of its structure and think about it, because the author has - with loving care - built that entire world for you to interact with. A place for everything, and everything its place. Except JK Rowling is a lazy thinker who never, ever considers the consequences of anything she says. Nagini is actually an Asian woman cursed to live as a snake, wizards used to magically disappear their shit from wherever they just stood and shat it out, Hermione Granger can have a time travel device to attended a bunch of classes but Harry can’t grab one off a nearby shelf and go back fifteen minutes and save his godfather, and nor a few years later can the Minister for Magic’s protection detail keep them on hand to go back half an hour and tell their past selves ‘Hey Voldemort is about to walk in here and kill y’all thought you ought to know.’ No author can work-out every aspect of every element in their works - that’s impossible, and why ARGs are solved by the internet hivemind in half a day even though they took a far smaller group of minds months to devise. But Rowling is intellectually lazy - she adds the holocaust to her Magic Fun Land without sparing a single moment to think that idea through. She then gets defensive when confronted by the suggestion that her worldbuilding might have been shallow. Hey your American wizard houses seem a bit racist also America doesn’t really use the house system in its schools - and her response was to lash out and not listen.  Rowling tried to move Potter from a fairy logic world with its own rules into our world with our rules and our history but she doesn’t know our history very well, or even our rules, so she tells us wizards shat on the floor until the 18th century while the rest of us sit around going ‘but humans have never done that as social groups - even in horrible slums and facility-free prison cells humans create a designated place for taking a shit even if it’s just ‘that corner over there.’ We don’t just drop pants and go whenever!” This is because, as a worldbuilder, J.K. Rowling is actually kind of rubbish.

[marshmallow-phd]

Out of Tune

Request:  A fluffy idol!auChanyeol x Reader oneshot or series where misunderstandings lead to a blossoming relationship. To lovers or to close friends, whichever you like😙 P.S. I love your writing so much 😭

A/N: Ahhh! Thank you for the first request! I had to read it a couple times to make sure it was an actual request! I hope this is what you wanted. If not let me know! I decided to make it a one shot for now! Happy reading!

Genre: Fluff, idol!au

Pairing: Exo x reader

Humiliated. You were alone in the dorm, but you were still utterly humiliated by what you were witnessing on the TV.

This was supposed to be a relaxing day off. Your members had banned you from the studio, knowing that if you spent even one more day in there, you’d come up with more ideas and more possible songs to put on the next album. There were already too many to choose from that your CEO had decided to start sending them out to the staff members and have them vote on which ones they really enjoy to make the cut.

To be honest, you were happy for time off and isolation. You were a homebody and needed your alone time. Especially since you wanted to watch the latest episode of Happy Together. A part of you was still a little salty that you weren’t there for filming. It was a special episode for young idol producers who were well recognized within the kpop community. The producers had asked you to participate given that three of your songs had won multiple music show awards and reached number one on the charts.

Unfortunately, your manager had to say no since you would actually be finishing up a dome tour in Japan. A detail you’d forgotten. There was so much on your schedule that you couldn’t keep everything straight. It frustrated you. You loved Happy Together. However, they did still try to make you apart of it by asking you a few questions that they’d bring up at some point during the broadcast.

Yoo Suk Jae was able to quiet everyone before moving on the conversation.

“Now, unfortunately, (y/n) was unable to be with us here today, but our writers were able to ask her a few questions.”

Here it was. You hugged your pillow close to your chest, feeling the blush dust your cheeks. Gosh, you were getting giggling. Again, you were thankful that you were alone.

“We asked (y/n) who she wanted to collaborate most on producing a song together,” Suk Jae continued. “She said that she would most like to work with Chanyeol and Ravi.”

A loud, high pitched squeal escaped from you as you threw yourself down on the couch. Quickly, you righted yourself, not wanting to miss out on the reactions.

Ravi had turned a little shy, nodding his head and smiling. You admired the VIXX rapper, you did. But truthfully, you only mentioned his name because of your manager. He pushed you to name two  idols as to throw off any suspicion. Didn’t want to cause any dating rumors. Not that you would mind too much. You had a crush, you had to admit. A face that contradicted the voice and a personality off stage that didn’t click with the one on stage were your weakness. Chanyeol was the epitome of both. You still remembered when your groupmate sent you a fancam of his Elyxion solo rap. You cried. If only you could write like that.

“Chanyeol, you’re awfully quiet,” Se Ho chimed in.

The giant was slightly startled, like he’d been pulled out of deep thought.

“Oh, um,” his signature phrase in that deep, vibrating voice. The one that you loved to listen to for hours on end. “I think it’d be hard. Our styles are very different. I work better on the computer and I think she does most of hers on the piano. I’m not sure how the end result would match up.”

Your jaw dropped. Did he really just underhand diss you on national television? Even the hosts seemed shocked at the normal happy virus’ unusual answer.

Slumping down on the couch, the pillow dropped from your hands. You couldn’t say that heart was shattered, your crush wasn’t that serious. But you definitely felt terrible. It wasn’t just the crush. It was that fact that you weren’t taken seriously as a producer yet, always compared to Woozi or Taeyang even though you were newer on the scene. You were quick to admit that you had a lot to learn, but isn't that where collaborations came in? Learning from each other.

Not caring about the rest of the broadcast, you turned the TV off. Sighing, you ignored your phone as it buzzed, no doubt your groupmates wanting to know how the broadcast was going and if you were dont giggling over Chanyeol yet. You certainly were.

This was the last place you wanted to be. If you hadn’t eagerly accepted to sing a duet OST with NCT’s Johnny, you wouldn’t have been anywhere near SM’s headquarters. You just hoped that the Exo boys were busy filming or recording and you wouldn’t run into any of them.

After several hours of recording, your throat was killing you. The cold bottles had already run out and to be honest, you wanted a coffee, not water. Taking a break, you wandered the empty halls until you came to the small cafe. You had to hand it to SM, they could be extravagant in certain areas. Your own company wasn’t quite big enough for a coffee shop, only a cafeteria for the staff and artists.

Iced coffee in hand, you turned to find an empty table. Then you froze. Standing about fifteen feet away was Chanyeol. The smile had slipped from his face and he stared at you opened mouthed. Rolling your eyes, you started back towards the recording studio, trying your hardest to avoid the top idol.

“(y/n), wait!” With legs too long to out run, he grabbed your upper arm, stopping you before you could make your escape.

Setting your jaw, you turned to look at him. “What?”

Chanyeol released you, not making eye contact as he ran a hand through his floppy hair. “D-did you see the broadcast?”

“Yes, I did,” you mumbled. “Along with several other million people.”

He flinched at your statistic. “I’m sorry. Can I explain?”

You scoffed. “Explain what? You made it very clear that I wasn’t good enough to collaborate with. I understand. We’re on different levels. Now, I have to get back to finish recording with Johnny.”

“Hold on!” Chanyeol grabbed your hand, pulling you to the nearest empty table. Unable to resist the puppy dog look he was giving you, you sat down across from him.

You motioned for him to continue.

Chanyeol groaned, running his hands over his face. “This isn’t how I wanted to do this.”

You frowned. “Do what?”

Sighing, he looked up at you. “I didn’t mean for what I said to come out like that. The words were coming out before I could stop them. I didn’t want people to… well….”

Crossing your arms, you leaned back in your chair. “Well… what?”

He mumble something under his breath as he picked at the paint on the table.

“What?”

His volume rose just enough for you make out, “That I like you.”

You blinked. “You… like me?”

Stunned. Now you were stunned. Chanyeol and you had only met a few times at music shows and awards ceremonies. Just short pleasantries exchanged, nothing more. You thought it was all completely one sided. As a member of Exo, he could walk up to any girl and have her weak in the knees.

Chanyeol nodded. “I think the fact that you can write whole songs on the piano or guitar is amazing. I struggle with that. They never turn out well. When I heard you might be doing the broadcast with us, I was excited. Junmyeon reminded me to be careful not to reveal my crush. You know, for the fans. But I took it a little too seriously. I really didn’t mean to sound like I didn’t think your songs are good. They really are! I’m just not good at these things.”

You smiled widely, biting down on your bottom lip. “Well, I think your work is amazing. I think whenever I work on the computer, it just sounds like noise. And…,” you took a deep breath, “I like you, too.”

The boy in front of you lit up like a sunrise. His own grin stretched from ear to cute ear.

“(y/n)!”

You turned in your chair to find your manager waving his hand for you to go to him. How disappointing. Standing up, you gave Chanyeol an apologetic look.

“I have to go.”

He nodded. “Maybe… you could join me in my studio? We could work on a song together and… get to know each other.”

You gave him one last smile. “It’s a date.”

[thunder-the-ranger-wolf]

Memory Lane, the Adopted remix

AN: AU of the story scrap where Tony was adopted.

Summary: Anthony Rodriguez is twelve years old when a butler says that the Starks, who have just lost their son, want to adopt him. Weirdness ensues as he tries not to get too wrapped up in their lifestyle and remember his parents’ hard-working roots.

This place is strange, and he doesn't know what he's supposed to do, so he does nothing. He sits on the floor in the center of the carpeted room that the butler claims as his, and eventually he falls asleep there. The floor is what he's used to. Not because the orphanage is bad, but it is a bit crowded. He earned something of a second income for the place as a mechanic. (Sure, I'll fix your radiator and see why your sink is backed up. Of course I'll figure out why your brand new TV is running static. It shouldn't be doing that, sir. I can get my brother to mow your lawn for you as well, would you like that?)

Richie wasn't really his brother. Richie was a couple years younger than him, but still able to get cash for work just like everybody else. He was a master with machines almost as much as Tony was, and would probably go on to actually be a mechanic.

At any rate, someone is shaking him awake and he knows exactly who it is.

“Stop it, Collin, you get breakfast when the Mickers say you do.”

The shaking persisted, with a strange voice calling his name, and he eventually opened his eyes.

“Can I help you?” He deadpanned. It was the butler from the day before.

“The floor can't be that comfortable.” He offered.

“Better than hardwood.” Anthony snorted. “Don't get me wrong, I'm not some abused headcase. The orphanage just gets crowded every now and then. Is something wrong?”

“I simply wished to inform you that breakfast is almost ready.”

“Cool. Is it always ready around this time?”

“Most of the time. If I'm not the one to wake you, someone else on the staff will.”

“Thanks for that.” Anthony offered before looking around the room.

“Did I bring my clothes in here?” He muttered to himself.

“There are some clothes that should be your approximate size in the drawers, Anthony.”

Sure enough, the 12 year old spotted a chest of drawers nestled in a corner of the room.

“I shall leave you to get dressed.” The butler offered.

“I'll be down as soon as I'm done.” Anthony informed him.

“I assume so.” Jarvis acquiesced.

Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*

That left Anthony to go through his new clothes and survey his room. The walls were a light shade of green with emerald trim, the curtains over the window matched the trim, and the floor was a nice beige color that didn't remind him of dog poop in the slightest. He rifled through the drawers to find several pairs of jeans that fit him perfectly and a bunch of t-shirts that had cartoon characters on them. The Flintstones wasn't his favorite show ever, but he'd wear it. Why not? They had Scooby Doo, Tom and Jerry, Pink Panther and Looney Toons, so that more than made up for it. They even had a couple shirts with cartoon characters that weren't even out yet. GI Joe and ThunderCats had been advertising lately, but wouldn't come out for another year. Maybe these folks wouldn't be so bad after all. Or maybe it was just the butler.

Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*

Okay, so it wasn't just the butler. Howard Stark liked to talk shop at the breakfast table (which was pretty damn big) despite his wife's best efforts to appear normal. Anthony got wrapped up pretty quickly when he heard the words Stark Industries pour out of the man's mouth, and Howard knew it.

“If you're interested, I might take you on a tour of the R&D department. I have government contracts, so you won't be able to see everything we're working on, but I do have some things out for civilians.”

Maria Stark’s charities were no secret, and while Howard was a genius, Anthony doubted that he was willing to focus solely on civilian products. Then again, not all wars involved the US, so something had to keep the company going during peacetime.

“If you don't mind, I'd like that a lot.” Anthony responded.

Breakfast continued to be a relatively silent affair, after which Jarvis and the others collected their dishes and Howard went about his day. Maria asked a few questions about how he liked the room before doing the same.

“Edwin tells me you slept on the floor last night.” A woman with dark brown hair and green eyes approached him after breakfast. Who-? Oh, the butler. (Edwin Jarvis, but only my wife calls me Edwin as it's a name I greatly despise.)

Although he quite liked the idea of the name, Edwin wasn't something he'd bestow on his firstborn (if he ever had one of those, which, after a few years of taking care of kids, he doubted he would.)

“Was there something wrong with the bed?”

“Not at all, Miss. I simply had to get used to my surroundings before I could presume anything to be mine. It was absolutely a one-time thing and I apologize if I offended you.”

“My dear boy, you shall be quite the flatterer when you grow up. You and Howard are quite alike in that way.”

“I doubt I have anything in common with a millionaire, but whatever helps you sleep at night is fine by me.”

“Oh, certainly. You'll see what I mean eventually.” The woman assured him.

Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*

“Your wife's got a sense of humor, Mr. Jarvis.”

“Dark brown hair, green eyes?”

“Yes, sir.”

“That'll never be necessary, my boy. Jarvis is just fine by me.”

“I'll have to get used to that, sir, but I'll never be able to see you as a servant.”

“Housekeeper.”

“Housekeeper, then. It'll still take me a bit to get used to that.”

Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*

Apparently school was a must, and he was expected to be some kind of special snowflake just because he'd been Warbucked. Well he said fuck that noise. Yes, he was smart enough to skip a grade or two, but what did that help when there was nothing after high school? Because college sure as hell wasn't free, and his knowledge of how the Earth rotated wouldn't help him as a mechanic.

“What do you want to do when you're done here?” One teacher asked. Assuming she meant long-term, Anthony has no clue. He could be anything, considering the Stark’s insistence on footing the bill. Howard had thrown countless pamphlets at him about various colleges, and he seemed particularly keen on MIT.

“What's even at MIT, anyway?” He snapped one night. “Like, I get that you all want me to do something with my life but until a couple weeks ago I was actually busy living and now there's just… there's nothing here! There's no one to keep track of, no job to do, and it's fuckin weird but now you're all in my face about shipping me off to some random school… why adopt me in the first place if the goal was to have me out of the way the entire time?!” He'd snarled. And nobody had an answer to that, all stunned into silence as they were.

“That… was never the goal. You do realize that you're coming back here when school’s out for winter and summer, don't you? And at this point, I don't give a shit what you do. Get a job as a mechanic, for all I care, but you're going to need to further your education before you do anything. That's what I wanted you to think about.”

“So I'm not being kicked out?”

“Hell no, kid. You're one of the smartest people I've met. I wouldn't give you back if someone dared to pay me.” Howard scoffed.

“I… I'd like to check on the other kids every now and then. Is that something that can happen?”

“We'll do it regardless. You should've told me you were bored earlier. I've got a few things in my workshop that could use your input.”

Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*

Life went on, and Tony (as everyone took to calling him) went with it. He got to MIT just fine, thank you very much, and at the age of 12 at that. He'd have his first degree by the time most kids were getting their high school diplomas, and wasn't that rattling.

Turns out that it wasn't. Not really. He wasn't as young as he could have been. Old enough to partake in almost anything except for drinking, which he wanted no part of already.

“Why not?” Twenty-two year old Whitney Frost snorted.

“You ever been around an alcoholic, sweetheart?” He drawled. Predictably enough, she shook her head. “It's not a pleasant feeling.”

Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*Adopted*

“Gettin’ all big for your britches, Mechanic?”

Tony froze, running the voice through in his head.

“Fuck off, Lakeland.” He snorted. The other man slid into step beside him and he wrapped an arm around Lakeland's shoulders.

“You doing alright?”

“As well as I can be.”

“Yeah, but that could be anything. You eat recently?”

Tony recalled with ease the fact that food had sometimes been a scarcity, and the oldest scrounged or went without when that happened. He'd been through a couple winters of that, and it was right around the time that Jarvis had picked him up. All of 12 years old and way past anything a high school could offer him.

“Not really.” Lakeland mumbled.

Tony stopped short, forcing his old friend to stop with him.

“You really think I don't remember what hunger looks like, John?” He demanded.

“You look like you eat pretty well, to me.”

“And I've been making sure everyone at the old place does too. Or I tried. You seen anyone from around our age lately?”

“You can't fix everything with money, Tony. Some of them are sick.”

“I know that well enough.” He snorted. He remembered what Frankie junior did to the younger kids when he had one of his episodes. Woe be unto any kid who crossed the bio kid's path at that place. They'd be sore for weeks.

“Thank God they ended up revoking that license.”

“Actually, I think it had something to do with you.”

“Me? I never said anything. Are you crazy?! Saying something meant Frankie would hunt you down and beat you bloody no matter where you were. Why would I speak up?!”

“Maybe you wouldn't. Buy someone did. And Frankie had no sway over them.”

Tony smacked a hand to his head and ran it down his face.

“What happened to Richie and Collin?” He asked, already regretting the answer.

“College. Last I checked they moved in together. Richie's over at Hammer, if you feel like rescuing him.”

“Hell yeah. Didn't they buy out Tasco or something like that a few weeks ago?”

“Yep. Been there since he graduated high school, according to Collin. Man, was that boy pissed.”

Tony snorted and smothered his next question. Poking around in people's lives got you nowhere if you didn't know how to do it right. Lakeland answered it for him though.

“They been roommates since Collin dropped outta high school. You'd have been 23, I think.”

“And they haven't driven each other mad.” Tony snorted.

“Something like that.”

Tony stepped away and turned so that he could see the other man's face.

“Come back to the Mansion with me. You look like you could use a drink.”

Lakeland snorted, knowing good and well that he wouldn't take a damn thing that reminded him of old Frank's place.

“Alright.” He agreed. “Better be something good.”

[gffa]

Hello! I hope I'm not bothering you, but you have so much good meta and I am in need of help. Please help me, gffa. You are my only hope. (Sorry) Do you know or have any sources on Jedi and food. Ie: what do they eat at the temple? Is there a mess hall of sort? A lot of fics give masters rooms with kitchens, but does this come from canon? Would it even be feasible, given the number of Jedi in the PT? And in that case, do they go grocery shopping? With what money (as in, do they get paid)? 1/2

2/2 If they eat together, who cooks? Do Padawans have kitchen duty or is there staff around? Recuited how, in that case? And most importantly, is the food Army level bad? Thanks

Hi!  THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE SUBJECTS.  :D  I have a series of posts about the Jedi Temple here, though keep in mind that a lot of that is based on Legends stuff!  But when you’re desperate for worldbuilding, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.What we do know from canon:  Think of the Jedi Temple more like a communal living space rather than traditional nuclear-family living spaces, so everyone has their own room to do with what they like (we see Anakin’s room, we see Yoda’s room, we see Ahsoka’s room, we see Obi-Wan’s room, we see Barriss’ room, etc.) but they’re not apartments like some of Legends wrote.  You’ll see it pop up a lot in fic and that’s because the Jedi Apprentice/Jedi Quest books did have Masters and Padawans sharing living quarters, but as George Lucas always said, that stuff was never canon to his Star Wars.  Instead, The Clone Wars shows us with Masters and Padawans having their own separate spaces to do with what they would.If you want, you can get around this by saying it’s a choice, that some Master/Padawan pairings do it one way, some do it another!  This is how I mentally adjust Obi-Wan and Anakin sharing an apartment during his Padawan days, but once he was Knighted, he had his own quarters.  BECAUSE I LIKE THE IDEA and canon doesn’t support it but it doesn’t wholly rule it out, either.  XDI’ve never seen a refectory in the canon (Legends had them, but again, not canon to George’s Star Wars, so take with a grain of salt, as we do most things about the Jedi Temple’s inner workings!), but the cross-section of the Jedi Temple says that there are several food-growing gardens (which means really fresh organic food!) and refectories spread across the Temple and it makes sense–if they don’t always cook meals in their apartments, there must be a larger dining area.

We don’t know what kind of food they serve there, I’ve never seen anything in canon that addresses it, so a lot of people assume they serve “boring, healthy” food there.  And I can agree with the healthy part, but one of the things that the worldbuilding mentioned along the way is that the Jedi Temple was purposefully structured to accommodate various alien species (like Turbo lifts were extra big to allow for the size of larger species, etc.), so it makes sense to me that their food would be designed to cater to all sorts of palates and food needs as well, which means probably a whole huge variety of things.  Still healthy, but a lot of various spices if you wanted them and lots of really fresh, crisp fruits and vegetables or the GFFA equivalent of those things.Given that there were around 10,000 Jedi Knights (and more Padawans, Initiates, Younglings, etc.) it makes sense (and the JA/JQ novels, as well as books like Dark Rendezvous have this as well) that there were several dining halls, some bigger and some more intimate, spread across the Temple, many of them probably being a little more specified than others.  There were gardens dedicated just for the kitchens, including ones where herbs and spices were grown.  There were some refectories that focused on specific types of food, like one might be more of a breakfast type of food, another on two levels over might be more an all-you-can-eat buffet, the one over just off the Room of a Thousand Fountains might have the best Antarian Spice Cake and you could still hear the soft sounds of the great waterfall there on quieter days.I think it likely that there were probably small hotplates and tea sets available to Jedi who wanted them (well, the GFFA equivalent XD), to have a quiet mug of tea or a private stash and that either they requisitioned them from the Temple or that they do get some sort of stipend that they can spend however they like.  A bit like asking your parents for $30 to go buy some candy you like and, as long as you’re not blowing it on space weed or whatever, they don’t care much how you spend that money, they trust you to spend it in the way that works for you.Think of the Temple as its own small city, in a lot of ways.  They grew much of their own food (but would import whatever else they needed, they get their money from the Republic, as they’re under the Senate’s jurisdiction) and had staff dedicated to cooking–just as there are Jedi who wish to become healers, there would be Jedi who wish to become chefs.  While you can have someone put on Kitchen Duty for misbehaving, there’s probably a well-structured machine of Jedi who genuinely want to be there, cooking and baking, in addition to the droid staff they have to help with distribution.  (We do know that there were “jobs” within the Temple at least available, given that Prosset is sent to work in the library after he tried to kill Mace.)  And sometimes they would go out shopping to get what they needed or sometimes they’d probably just order on-line, like sometimes you feel like going to Target and sometimes you just want to order something off Amazon or the HoloNet in you pjs.  XD

[octranslations]

Haiiro no Ginka Volume 2

Haiiro no Ginka Volume 2

Translation Credits: 1999.1.20 DEBUT SINGLE IN STORE - Risu “Akuro no Oka” “Yurameki” in Italy - Risu Shinya Nemunemu hakushi no daigyakusu - Mbear Ganso Kaoruya - Nao Meisho de Meishuu Mr. Drums’ House Edition - Risu Aibiki no Mori Toshiya - Risu Kyo's Corner (Announcement) - Risu SEXUAL Inoue LA Diary - Risu NEWS L.A. Edition - Risu

1999.1.20 DEBUT SINGLE IN STORE

"Zan" "Akuro no Oka" "Yurameki"

Debuted at 5th, 6th, 7th

Music Shop Kunihara?Goryokaku Store

Sapporo?GURUGURU   Mr. Habaguchi

Shibuya 109 also has Dir en grey!

January 20, the major debut singles are finally on sale. The CD stores were also filled with Dir en grey, and you can see different stores nationwide decorated by Dir en grey. They made a large appearance even at Shibuya 109, and I think there were people who took pictures of it. Also in the Oricon Chart they debuted 5th, 6th and 7th. The members and staff both are grateful to all the fans who wouldn't have made this possible without their unwavering crazy and warm following/support?

“Akuro no Oka” “Yurameki” in Italy

When we are welcoming the end of 1998, the 5 members went to Italy for the PV shooting of “Akuro no Oka” and “Yurameki”. On the way they waited 4 hours to get on the next plane, Shinya read a book that he brought with him from Japan, Kyo and Kaoru ate pizza. (By the way it seems that Die was pretty ripped off by this store without him realizing it…) From here Kyo got addicted to pizza and ate it the whole time in Italy.

Then were forced to ride on the bus for 2 to 3 hours, at the end of a long travel without being able to get off in the destined airport due to strong winds and having the time to arrive and sleep in the hotel they started with make-up. The shooting for that day were the individual scenes and performance scenes of “Akuro no Oka” at a western style house that is also used in movies.

On the second day, the scheduled departure time was 6:30am. Having a breakfast buffet at the hotel with their complete make-up and wearing their costumes was a pretty conspicuous bizarre sight. A shrine that looked like the acropolis was today’s shooting location. Here was the image scene and individual scenes carrying instruments. These was the first costumes for the day. Because of it being quite cold, coat and mufflers were vital while the camera was not running.

Third day, the final day. After shooting the image scene at the back alley streets in town was the shooting of “Yurameki” at a church. While waiting there were pigeons that gathered near the bus because of the bread that was scattered. When Shinya was about to give bread, because of the noisy Italians who passed by, the pigeons went somewhere…

“The stupid foreigners?” Shinya was angry.

Take Note of This Italy Important News

They waited for 4 hours in Milan

Breakfast in full make-up and full costume

Shinya seems cold in his costume

Temples are cold…

Kyo, is addicted to pizza!

Loo~ng travel and waiting time

Die was ripped off

Toshiya caused a disturbance! (Details are in the news page!)

Shinya Nemunemu hakushi no daigyakusu

Hello everyone.  This corner has begun again.  Last time there wasn't much so now there probably won't be much either, right?  Well then, so let's introduce the first postcard.

"Please tell me about Shinya-kun's beloved dog, Papii-chan."

This is Papii-chan, who lives at my parent's home.  The name is Papii because the breed is called papillon.  It's quite a fashionable way of naming a dog.  Of course I named him.  We got him in December of my third year of elementary school.  At that time he was already two months old.  At that time he was quite tough and the small me was often chased and bitten.  Now, because he's grown old he doesn't really bite, but his quick anger hasn't changed at all.  He really gets angry quickly.   He definitely gets angry five times a day.  For example, he is cuddling with someone and if another person calls "Papii" he will go to snap at that person with great strength.  Also, Papii loves Pedigree Champion dog food and he won't eat any dog food other than that at all.  The Pedigree Champion dog food seems so delicious, so even if you stare at it from the side, he'll get angry.  He also likes meat and if I'm eating meat he comes and says, "Give me meat" .  And so if I pretend to give him the meat and don't he gets really angry.  He's a troublesome dog.   He always thinks of himself as the best.  On the stairs as well, he alone... it alone cannot go up by itself. In the past he went up but, he planned on going up the stairs of the new place we moved to the way he did in our old house so his feet became tangled, and he got hurt.  Since that time when Papii wants to use the stairs he'll call "someone come here".  And then someone will come and carry him up the stairs.?Papii also gets quite cold.  In the past whenever it would get cold I would take out the kotatsu. Then, I would set up the kotatsu and leave the room for a little and return, and already Papii would be sleeping in the kotatsu. To think he's a dog, why does he get cold so easily??Ah, no matter what I said, he's a very cute dog.

Last time I wrote about Nakata Daimaru Racket as Shinya's little corner, a considerable amount postcards came concerning that.  I've picked a few from among those postcards.

It's popularity before is like Downtown's [popularity] now.

He was definitely on TV every New Years.

When I asked my mother, she said "You don't know him?  Your father and your grandfather and your grandmother know him.  You don't know anything huh."#When I asked my family they said, "What...? You don't know? Ah~, it's the end of Japan. There's nothing that can be done."

Like what Shinya-kun said, I think a lot of people know him. ?So, well, just take a look at this and maybe you'd know, it is said that in Japan if you don't know Nakata Daimaru Racket then you are not Japanese.

So, that being said I will explain Nakata Daimaru Racket to you.

Nakata Daimaru Racket It was said that it is a Manzai that would make you laugh in three seconds, he was a big star until the end of the war, it's the popularity was twice more than "Kashimashi Musume". As for the beginning, Nakata Daimaru debuted but his partner at that time died.  After that, he rejoined with his brother racket and debuted.

With the first second of flawless speech, the continuous gags, the viewers will be sent into a vortex of laughter. The younger brother racket accidentally laughs a lot at Daimaru's adlibs and that would again invite laughter from the audience.   After Daimaru's death, Racket managed variously alone, but recently it so happens that he is retired.

And that's it.  And so there were many postcards that came asking, "Why does Shinya-san know something that way back?" that's because I have lived 10 times longer than everyone. Fufufufufu(Hehehehe)......

See you again.

Extra: About Nakata Daimaru Racket Toshiya: When I asked my friends, they knew. Why did that many postcards come? Die: If you write it at the very end then they'd read it! Didn't it seem like it was saying, "send me [postcards]" right? So they'll send it over!

Translator's Notes: 1. Manzai (??) is a style of stand-up comedy in Japan, which usually involves two performers—a straight man (tsukkomi) and a funny man (boke)—trading jokes at great speed. Most of the jokes revolve around mutual misunderstandings, double-talk, puns and other verbal gags. In recent times, manzai has often been associated with the Osaka region, and manzai comedians often speak in the Kansai dialect during their acts.

2. A kotatsu (??) is a low, wooden table frame covered by a futon, or heavy blanket, upon which a table top sits. Underneath is a heat source, often built into the table itself. Kotatsu are used almost exclusively in Japan, although a similar product called a korsi is also used in Iran.

3. For the curious here is a clip of Daimaru Racket (Kansai-ben only):{youtube}LjNdbLZd-9c{/youtube}

Ganso Kaoruya

Welcome. Thank you for coming to Ganso Kaoruya . This time there are only a few things but please take a look.

It can’t be seen clearly but it’s a pretty excellent work.

Again, it’s my stuff. Devilman & Amon Black Version

Great job!! You were even able to create the detailed parts.

Next challenge is in Kitty-chan!!

Again, my stuff.

I never give-up~

…Hello.

Recently, I have been rummaging for and buying CDs, LDs, Videos(VHS). Even in LA I was brainwashed by MTV and bought a lot like Shawn Mullins and the like but mostly I didn’t listen to it and went home. All of a sudden I would go into a record shop but before I just bought CDs but I wanted to watch movies so I ended up buying the movie and it’S soundtrack that I thought, “I would never watch!!” which was Titanic. Well, it is a good thing! However!! There were tons of lives that I wanted to see during the end of the year and beginning of the year. I wanted to watch D=SIRE’s Liquid(room)! (I was really supposed to go~) I wasn’t able to watch Bauhaus in October! Marilyn Manson and Gastunk also made me want to cry…therefore, I am looking for more creations. (Totally unrelated though.)  Send me things that will clear up my anger!! And so, Ah! Thank you for the Christmas Presents and New Year’s Card!  

This month’s Heavy rotation (currently, January 20)

Fear Factory

Obsolete

The Goo Goo Dolls

Dizzy Up the Girl

Garbage  

Version 2.0

Shiina Ringo  

Koko de kisu shite

Motion Picture  

Psycho

Shawn Mullins

Soul’s Core

Rammstein  

Sehnsucht

Devin Townsend

Infinity

AKIRA Ootomo Katsuhiro

Meisho de Meishuu Mr. Drums’ House Edition

So, is everyone in “a knot” doing well? This is a bit or rather pretty late but thank you to all the fans who sent me presents, messages, letters etc. for my birthday last year. Also thank you always for sending me fan letters. I properly read all of it so there is no need to worry.

So, Meisho de Meishuu Vol. 2 is, what do we have here!! Once again we have a guest.

Let me introdu~ce, Mr. Drums who does Tanaka in Dir en grey (refer to the picture)

This time let’s go a bit back to Christmas. The location is Mr. Drums’ house where he has prepared 5 bottles of champagne. By the way, on this day, Mr. Drums’ mother and younger brother Kazuma were in the house, this mother was very annoying and kept on harassing us, she smoked things like echo or wakaba, Kazuma is a delinquent and picked a fight with me so it was awful. But the most awful one was Mr. Drums. Apparently he is weak with alcohol, even though he said that he has work after this interview, his face was completely red, even his ears were red, and in the end he couldn’t speak. But since it’s my corner, even if it were forced he drank and evaluated [the alcohol]. Then Mr. Drums suddenly tried to run on top of the TV, when I chased him and tried to make him drink, finally he went down. That’s unfortunate. But he was able to properly drink 5 kinds [of alcohol] so please read the table of comments after.

“Itadakima~su?”

“How are you feeling recently?”

“…….silence”

“Mr. Drums please drink some more!”

“What are you doing?”

“That’s it”

Well, this time I will end [this column] with this. Well as for the season, it will soon be spring, for those of you who want to try drinking it why not also drink it together with your beloved boyfriend or girlfriend on Christmas this year (this is way in the future…) (For those who say that they don’t have a girlfriend or boyfriend, please try finding one until then.)

So next time I will send it from LA! I am planning again on calling a guest so please look forward to it.

Well, until we meet again (mata aimashou). Espresso!!

Today’s Wine

Wine Name

Comment

Score

1

CASTELL BLANCH ROSAD CAVA

It seems to have a pretty bitter smell…Ah! Yes it’s a red win chic that’s easy to drink. It feels like you’re drinking in Artist Room A

It feels like swimming in the Aegean sea ? Mr. Drums

6.79

2

SUNTORY SPARKLING WINE SILVER

It’s pretty sweet. Well it’s for you guys, middle and high school students. It’s ant hell…what’s ant hell? “to get worms (in your stomach)” (Mr. Drums) It is on the edge whether you fall into ant hell or not.

Too sweet. It feels like being assimilated to it while being buried in sugar and the surrounding sugar is burnt by a lighter ? Mr. Drums

5.55555??

3

CROISIE LIGHT

I think this is for elementary school kids….because it’s sweet, I think elementary school students would really like this.

Being hit by a rain of iron mold, that moment made me feel better, I feel nauseous I think I’m drunk (nods) ? Mr. Drums

3.1415926

4

SUNTORY SPARKLING WINE GOLD

It completely doesn’t feel like drinking in a high end club in Ginza.

It feels like I can see 5 cm inside ? Mr. Drums

6.81

5

VARICHONET CLERC MERLOT GAMAY

This is for 17 year olds…feels like a 17 year old loose socks

This is the most delicious. It has sweetness and bitterness, in memories (drunk) a 41 year old…(definitely drunk) his wife left him, on the side of a too sweet park, I become Shinya ? Mr. Drums

5.59

Aibiki no Mori Toshiya

Happy New Year! This year together with "aknot" please support Dir en grey!

This is Toshiya's corner which will begin again, thanks to everyone who thought and sent titles! But somehow there wasn't one that fit so I tried thinking with my insufficient/lacking head! And I thought to go with "Aibiki no Mori" (rendezvous forest) as Toshiya's corner title!! The origin of the corner title is, actually I copied the name (laughs) Since I really love Sakamoto Ryuichi-san and among Nakatani Miki's album called, "Shokumotsu Rensa (Food Chain)", there was a song called "Aibiki no Mori de" and for me, I personally liked that song...so yes, I copied it (laughs) But, so far in my own way I tried the title while completely ignoring things like the meaning of "Aibiki no Mori" is a journal of memories where "I wanted to make it like a forest of secrets that I have with the fans and everyone". It's a bit fishy? (laughs) But, in this corner I don't want to write lies and I want to tell the truth to everybody

??? What in the world are those numbers above???Ah well. Yesyes, I want it to be a corner that everyone reads so I decided with "Aibiki no Mori". Thank you very much to the people who thought of and sent titles!! And I'm sorry!! Also next I am asking for costume designs. I am asking for designs that you would like me to wear. Well even though all of it won't be OK, I may use parts of it. I am waiting for everybody's sense and avant-garde ideas. Also the people who were chosen will have their names and member id posted in this corner and after that I will send them a present.

I am looking forward to everyone's design pictures!!

Well then please get lost in "Aibiki no Mori (rendezvous forest)"  (laughs)

?/× (TUE)

Well the indies tour has finally begun. In the morning I went to Tokyo station using a taxi and went to Nagoya on the shinkansen (bullet train). I was sort of happy when I was finally in the shinkansen. The live at Bottomline was to put it bluntly, unsatisfactory. Even among the lives that I've done up until now, honestly it was the worst. I was very annoyed, embarrassed, and regretful. Due to the lack of physical strength and extreme oxygen deprivation, I collapsed after the main set. After the encore, there was a heavy air backstage and everyone was looking down. Budoukan is 100 years too early and I looked down on myself. Even if I wrote more about it I would end up writing negative things. Nagoya...I am really sorry to the fans, maybe if you would come to a live just one more time, the next one I would definitely show a good live.

I promise, the next time...

?/×?WED)

In the morning, we checked out of the hotel and went to Kanezawa. I remembered the previous night's live and had an internal argument, "today for sure..." I personally wasn't satisfied with the Kanezawa live on the previous tour so this time I thought that I must make a good live. It was good that Az hall was pretty nice. But as expected I felt that my performance was a bit not enough but I thought of thinking positively. Everyone signed on Azhall's backstage hallway wall. Also I kicked the micstand and it's a bit unfortunatey that I wasn't able to directly apologize to the Azhall manager. I am really sorry! The oden that I had at the party was delicious. Good night...

?/×?FRI)

Today is at Kumagaya Vogue! This was the first time I was here since the disband live of band before Dir en grey was formed so I was really happy! If my memory is correct, the other band at that time was the band that 4 of them were in so it was a place with a lot of memories so I thought to do my best. The live was really good. Finally it felt like the engine started and my body was light. Also what shocked me also was I stage dived which I haven't done since the Cowboy World [live] in Osaka (laughs) To the people who were under and whose body I stepped on, I am really sorry!!

At any rate, those gibberish numbers on top! Enough already and disappear!

Well, after the live, without taking a break we got on the shinkansen and appeared live on nippon broadcast's radio, "Ultracountdown". Cool K-san was an interesting person.

?/×?MON)

Sendai Makana's stage was a bit small, so it was pretty difficult to play. But the live was okay but everyone's fervor was great, and it felt good. SuperRecord's Jimmy-san seems to be doing okay and thank you for coming to the live! After the live speaking of Sendai, it's "Gyu tan" (beef tongue) so we went out and ate it, as expected it was delicious! As a souvenir I bought cheese and fresh dorayaki. We will come to Sendai again (laughs)

?/×?TUE)

Today is my first time in Sapporo! This is the first live [in Sapporo] so I was really looking forward to the reaction of fans who've been waiting for us until then but the live was awful. "M-GAZET" also mentioned the reason. It would be better if I believed more in everyone...I am sorry! To the people who were looking forward to it. I am sorry, really. Sapporo, next time we will come at full blast so please look forward to it!!!

?/×?THU)

Niigata JUNKBOX...it was hot/exciting! Everybody went wild (for us). I was able to do a live without thinking of anything. Everybody's rhythm/flow was great and more importantly you made me forget about what happened in Sapporo. Thank you Niigata!! My friends from middle school and "D+L"'s AKIRA came to watch us. I was happy. After the party everybody went bowling. Everyone was excited and it was really fun. Thank you very much for today everyone!!

?/×?SAT)

Today is Osaka! Everybody was in high spirits. As expected everyone seems hyped since its their hometown. Speaking of hometowns, I also wanted to have lives in Nagano (tears) Well, anyway the live was okay but for me the performance was shabby. So I am sorry to everyone. But anyway I want to optimistically do my best...since if I get caught up in negative thoughts it would be difficult to get out of it. During the part Punch UFO came and it was interesting. Also, I was able to go drink out with my friends from high school after a long time and it was fun. Thank you Osaka!

?/×?MON)

The live at Hiroshima Namiki Junction was okay. Did everyone enjoy it? I would be happy if you enjoyed it. Also the Hiroshima yaki was very delicious. The promoter was also a very nice person. 2 more lives left I must do my best!!

?/×?TUE)

Hakata Be-1 was hot/exciting! The backstage was small but the live was pretty exciting. The atmosphere was also good. I didn't dive but it was live where I wanted to dive! After the live we did a quick party, and everyone went bowling (laughs) it was really fun. After that me and a couple of people went out and ate rate. We will come again to Hakata.

?/×?TUE)

Finally, we came to Matsuyama.

When I remember it was early. Before I realized it [we were there]. When I think of going home to Tokyo, I felt lonely. As for the live due to a miss with the song order we weren't able to get into high spirits but at the very very last it was nice that the fans who stayed during the encore were able to sing "GARDEN" with us. Well, the last live is Budokan!

Thank you Matsuyama!

?/×?MON)

Well, finally today is Budokan! In this place everything up until now will...I will not forget a day like today, I will never forget the fun on this day...and the regret (this is again getting old (laughs)) I can't say this well into words but since I think that there is nothing that doesn't change, at the very least I don't want my feelings and memories to not change. Forever. And more importantly to every who's been supporting us until now, thank you very much!! From now on let's fly higher and higher together.

?/×??)

From today we will go to LA because of recording. We will train under Yoshiki-san's guidance. Please look forward to and wait for the next song!! In addition, please read Mr. Inoue's page for the LA journal!

Toshiya first nude!!!

I also had this period (laughs)

So embarrassing~ (laughs)

Congratulations on your marraige Chara-san!

I hope you two will be happy (laughs)

Drop in sometimes! (The person on the right was the engineer of "I'll")

This time it ends here. Did you enjoy it? On January 20 the singles were finally released at the same time. To the who haven't listened to it, please listen to it! If possible please seriously listen to it with the volume on loud! Well, let's rendezvous again at the "Aibiki no Mori"!!!

Translator's Notes:

1. Gy?tan (???) is a Japanese food that is made from grilled beef tongue. The word gy?tan is a combination of the Japanese word for cow (?, gy??) and the English word tongue. Since gy?tan literally means "cow tongue," the word is also used to refer to cow tongues in Japan. The custom of cooking gy?tan originated in Sendai in 1948, and is usually served with barley rice, tail soup, and pickles in the Sendai area.

2. Dorayaki (????, ????, ????, ????) is a type of Japanese confection which consists of two small pancake-like patties made from castella wrapped around a filling of sweet red bean paste.

3. The numbers that Toshiya was referring to in the column was this line of random numbers that divided the column into the top and bottom sections. Please refer to the original.

Kyo's Corner (Announcement)

Among the postcards sent to Kyo’s Akuma ka Warumono ka, there was one that seemed to have lies written on it, as long as that kind of fan is there, this corner is spoiled/ruined and I am enraged.

I was so angry and shock that I opened a hole in the wall, and after that I never spoke anything about the fanclub

Because of that this corner is on a break.

What a nuisance

SEXUAL Inoue LA Diary

"a knot" told me that anything is fine so write anything about the LA recording so I am seated in front of a typewriter, well, I don't have a typewriter! Typewriters are old! So hello. This is the manager, Atsushi Inoue.

After Budokan finished and after the storm of <interviews, photoshoots>, before coming to LA, in order to concretize the sound as much as possible, everyone was confined to the studio. Then to LA ---- then again at Narita (international airport) there were a couple of fans...(mid-November was written on the flyer that was distributed at Budokan. Fail.Fail) but since everyone sent us off without causing any inconvenience we were relieved as we got on the plane...ah~(roughly 10 hours)~later we arrived in LA.

Then we had a meal together with the local coordinator and co. -- we had Lunch Time at a pretty clean looking pizza and pasta restaurant. As expected of America, the volume was incredible. The food and also the lady next to us...sorry...but the Beer was delicious.

Then we checked-in in the hotel, and was surprised when we got to our rooms. It was big big. It also had a kitchen. Yey (but at this time I didn't think that in the end I would sleep in the room and go home since I couldn't cook...sigh)

We placed our things, and everyone gathered together! We went to the studio ---and was surprised, it was big big. The studio and also the meeting room. After waiting for awhile, we had a pretty brief meeting with  Mr. YOSHIKI and the engineers, foreign staff etc. (about the equipment and flow etc), It seems that there will be a break once per week. Lucky (But...at this time I didn't think that the first week was a photoshoot, the second week was a break but from the third week there was no break...sigh) (Recording flow is everyone plays the music together, then Drums?Bass?Guitar?Guitar?Vocal - this seems to be the basic flow but there are times when the Guitar follows after Drums, and times when Vocals are added soon after just the rhythm is recorded. There are also times when they are working on the next song while the Vocalist is recording. So it seemed like it wasn't definite that it would follow this order. )

After the meeting finished the busy Mr. YOSHIKI wasn't able to come eat with us after but the members and me and the office people, recording company people and the coordinator went to get food -- Even in LA there are quite a lot of sushi restaurants where we had Dinner Time but as expected it lacked something/wasn't the greatest...but the beer was delicious. Thus the first day ended with this.

From now was the real part, the second day in LA, for the meantime all of the members worked on "Akuro no Oka". They took a recording of it playing together while choosing instruments and equipments. This took one whole day. LA third day based on what was recorded the previous day, recording started from drums. This took one whole day.

Fourth day bass recording while playing along with the drums of the previous day. This took one whole day. Fifth day guitar (Die) recording while playing along with the sounds recorded until the previous day. This took one whole day.

*By the way the members were at the studio and saying things like this and that and did individual practice while somebody else was recording.

The next day was a day off from the studio, and was a photoshoot day for Dir en grey. From early morning we were at cameraman Mr. William Hames' studio for make-up. Then downtown and on rooftops, under the bridge, railway tracks etc...there were also pretty dangerous areas, foreigners were looking at us oddly, and it was pretty unbelievable/awesome. The photoshoot finished at dusk. "My legs hurt." ???Shinya

Then we went to get food --- it was a pretty famous steak restaurant where he had DinnerTime. It was a restaurant with only courses, even if I was full before the meat came when it appeared it was big big!. I wasn't able to finish it but the Vocalist not only ate meat but also a big lobster. After finishing desert we went to the hotel -- "I ate everything that was in front of my eyes. The lobster was delicious." ???Kyo

Then recording day again, Kaoru the Guitarist's recording. The next day too.

One day during the first week, coming home from the studio at midnight everyone went shopping at a big supermarket (there was a big refrigerator, stove, oven, dishwasher etc. in the hotel) everyone bought a lot of different things. One person got large ice cream, then another person got large meat, then another person got large potato chips etc???"Ice cream is the best"???Shinya

The first week, it was Mr. Yoshiki's birthday so the members, staff and studio people all celebrated with champagne. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"???Dir en grey

This is the second week. All of the members began with pre-production for "Yurameki" a song that they haven't finished yet at the same time with the vocal recording of "Akuro no Oka"!?

Two people were down during the "Yurameki" pre-production First it was Kaoru who didn't speak much when we arrived in LA, when I placed a hand on his forehead, it was pretty hot. When I thought about it he was fast asleep and slept in the room on the 2nd day. By the way at this time, he didn't seem to have an appetite so the coordinator and I went to a Japanese store and bought medicine, rice, instant curry, instant congee, miso soup etc.., I brought it to his room and Kaoru-kun in his room seemed pretty lonely. "Kukure Curry was the best"???Kaoru

Then the next day after he got better and went back to work, Toshiya was down. He also slept in his room for two days. This time too I went to the Japanese store.

Getting harmony was this difficult! There is a considerable amount of vocal harmony (voice singing in chorus) included in "Akuro no Oka" "Yurameki" but the equipment that we used at that time was awesome because there was only two in the world, it was too great! It was that kind of equipment but it was troublesome because when the Vo would sing a little bit it would stop and then everything would become confusing, and caused the Vo to get in a bad mood. "I the Hakaider will hakai you (I the destroyer will destroy you)"???Kyo

Design check on the internet is di?ffi?cult There are various different design related things such as the jacket design, card, poster etc, the members would think about it together, and faxing the rough draft design was difficult, so in order to properly see the color and form it has to be through the internet. This was also troublesome since this was three singles the size was too big and it easily won't come. Printouts also took time and we had to redo it several times so it pretty much took a lot of time. "It's finally here~it finally came~"???Toshiya The sole holiday In LA there was only one day break, and it was the most important holiday in America, "Thanksgiving". The studio was on a break. And believe it or not Universal Studios where we wanted to go was also on a break???it seems that on this day the whole of America is on holiday and everyone is at home???boohoohoo???then again since Yoshiki invited us to eat turkey at his house on the previous day, everyone was treated to good food. It was really delicious. "Only 15 more minutes???only one more???Let's finish it with this"???Die

Shopping GO!GO!GO! The members didn't really have much of a chance to go out so when they found some time they would go out to shop. (Not all 5 members???) I think they shopped a lot at Tower Records? On the day of mastering (the day before they go back to Japan) even for a short time went and shopped at the stores in front of the Universal Studios entrance and a big department store, Melrose Avenue but everyone bought only CDs. (Well there was a person who bought clothes and accessories) "I bought a ring but it was also sold in Marui"???Kaoru

The local staff and engineer and studio staff were as expected all foreigners so I thought that I should work harder on English but the recording engineer Mr. STAN KATAYAMA was Japanese and was pretty laid back but he was fan and the members seemed to have had an easy time recording. But the instrument technician and other staff everyone were foreigners. We sort of had a hard time with the finer details. "I will study English."???Die

Local coordinator? Mr. GEORGE The whole time during the LA recording Mr. GEORGE (ex. LADIES ROOM) was in the studio and taught us different things. (English, music, billiards, muscle, games, grit/determination, that thing, this thing, and until that thing???) he really helped us. He brought us along shopping and even called us because he bought a Xmas tree in his room (together with Guitar, Guitar, Bass) At that time he showed us the last scene of Armaggedon, at any rate thank you very much. "Aah, how are you president?"???Toshiya

Best Producer There was a lot of surprising and interesting things about Yoshiki. I think that we are still indebted to him, we will be counting on him even from now on.

"Thank you very much. We will be counting on you." (in harmony)???Dir en grey

Translator's Notes:Kyo was referring to "Hakaider" who was a character featured in the movie

Mechanical Violator Hakaider (????????? Jinz? Ningen Hakaid?)

NEWS L.A. Edition

Kyo…having a hard time!!! We have new information about Kyo. A tragedy has occurred. After spilling oil and making his kitchen sticky, he recklessly threw his garbage and the oil further spilled all over his kitchen. We still don’t know whatever happened to him.

Birthday Guessing 12 Choice Game Big Break

It seems that a birthday guessing game seems to be popular around the members.

Example

1 March 2 September 3 June

.

.

.

12 *…

A deer appeared in the hotel!

Shinya walking alone angry!?

?/?, Shinya who was annoyed at Manager Sexual Inoue over a trivial matter went home alone until the hotel. Because of that the manager further got mad at him. As if to add insult to injury…

Exclusive Scoop Toshiya! Incident in Italy

An incident happened to Toshiya who went to an Italian church for a certain PV shooting in 1998 (or caused an incident). That church does not allow people to bare their legs, (because it is against God), and Toshiya who was completely unaware of that appeared in the church with his bare legs with abandon. There area was in uproar. In the end Toshiya spent his waiting time with his legs wrapped in a cloth.

Kaoru, W face to face meeting!

Sources say that Kaoru was thrilled by the W face to face meeting. The first one was a face to face meeting with Asuka from “Evangelion”. It seems that Bay FM planned it in secret and called her to appear in the show. Regarding this incident, Kaoru commented “Oh my~, I was surprised”. The other one was a face-to-face meeting with Shiina Ringo at Music Station (a music show). If you even look at Kaoru’s corner you’d know that he is pretty into her and expressed his joy on their first meeting.

Die, mysterious behavior!?

An uncanny incident occurred since “aknot” started. Die drank alcohol and was drunk, mistaking it for his shoes, he tried wearing a bag on one foot and a magazine on the other foot. After getting some more information, he was grunting and thought that those were shoes and struggled with it to a considerable degree.

[the-evolving-falcon]

hostageshipping for the ship meme ask

Send in two (or more) names and I’ll fill all this out about the ship!

General:

Rate the Ship -  Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - Till death do them part.

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Rather quickly once they’ve developed a mutual understanding and realized how alike they truly are, with Reiji evolving past his huge misconceptions of Shun and completely owning up to his unjustified shitty behavior towards him and Yuuto by apologizing and putting an actual effort into making amends. Shun would follow suit after a period of mistrust, change his own attitude towards Reiji, and by the moment they are having deep and meaningful discussions, they are already way past the point of no return :D

How was their first kiss? - Electrifying. Tbh, there are various options for first Hostage kisses, all of which make sense equally. I may or may not talk about these in a separate post as I only really bring them up in private convos, but… yeah, pleasurable, warm, electrifying is what they all have in common.And please, people, neither of these two are too stupid and OMGOMGOMG awkward to kiss without messing up in a disgustingly embarrassing fashion. It’s disgraceful to portray them in such fashion.

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Either Reiji proposes to Shun or they are just having this very casual conversation of “We should get married.” - “…Yeah, we should.” at the dinner table lol

Who is the best man/men? - If he’s alive in the verse in question - Yuuto;  otherwise, it’d be Tsukikage or both lol

Who is the bridesmaid(s)? - Ruri - potentially the rest of the bracelet girls.

Who did the most planning? - Reiji

Who stressed the most? - Nakajima Neither is the type to stress over such matters

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.The former is how they’d prefer to marry; the latter is how they’d probably end up marrying due to Reiji’s responsibilities as the CEO of Leo Corp. They would, however, definitely hold a very small celebration separate from the official one, with only those they genuinely care about or at least to to some extent value - aka less than 10 people - being invited, and that’d be what they’d consider their true wedding in their memories. 

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - Those they’d specifically not invite are people they’ve already killed at that point tbh lol

Sex:

Who is on top? - They take turns, meaning the two of them are equals in every aspect of their relationship.

Who is the one to instigate things? - At the beginning of their relationship, it is Shun, given how he is better at adapting to new circumstances than Reiji, who is kinda prudish on top of it. As their relationship progresses, however, they are pretty much equal in regard to instigating ‘quality time’

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 7.5 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right nowI do believe these two’d have intercourse quite regularly, though it is important to mention that they are very much capable of going without too, with no negative impact on their relationship whatsoever, as they are attracted to one another’s minds, not bodies. And no, no intercourse in public or other ‘risky’ places either; Shun and Reiji are not neanderthals, please and thank you.

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s headNo toys, but… Reiji’d definitely want to experiment a little, with Shun acquiring a taste for trying out new things as well after some time has passed. But…yeah *cough* tying one another up with Reiji’s scarf *cough* a mild kink involving Reiji making Shun say ‘please’ *cough* a very mild and harmless foot kink because ankles without it being dirty or grossly sexual *cough*

How long do they normally last? - It depends on how much time they have at hand before they need to sleep - and on whether they want to just quickly blow off steam or explore every inch of one another’s body.

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - Always.

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.Again, anything from 2-5 could happen depending on the exact circumstances and intentions.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.Contrary to popular belief, I see these two as an incredibly physically affectionate couple. PDA would be very tame and limited (mostly, they just hold hands), but… yeah, these two, in particular, are very affection-starved for multiple reasons- they’d of course make use of the fact that they’ve finally found someone they adore and genuinely do want to exchange such displays of affection with.

Children:

Children and either character do not work - period.

How many children will they have naturally? -

How many children will they adopt? -

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? -

Who is the stricter parent? -

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? -

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? -

Who is the more loved parent? -

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings?

Who cried the most at graduation? -

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? -

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - Shun. While they usually eat the meals prepared for them by the kitchen staff, there are days Reiji is craving Shun’s homemade food in particular, and as Shun himself is holding Leo and Himika in contempt for having deprived Reiji of any kinds of small meaningful gestures showing that he is being valued as a person, he’ll happily oblige him whenever it doesn’t interfere with his duties - despite how he couldn’t care any less about what he himself is eating.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Reiji. But then again, with Shun as his competition, that really doesn’t say all that much lol

Who does the grocery shopping? - Neither. Preparing food and buying groceries is the task of the Akabas’ kitchen staff, and since the fridge is always well-stocked, Shun can just take the ingredients he needs from there. That being said, if there’s a special kind of ingredient Shun needs for his meal that is either seasonal or has to be super fresh, it can definitely occur that they just go and buy it together as some sort of mini-date.

How often do they bake desserts? - I cannot picture them doing any such thing prior to Ruri being freed - and even then, it’d take a lot of asking nicely and gentle bullying for them to join Ruri in the kitchen.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - The kitchen staff’s meals are well-balanced and healthy, meaning far more veggies as ingredients than meat.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - As Shun doesn’t really cook anything fancy, just… simply, homemade dishes that are remarkably tasty and Reiji’d just suggest going out, neither really qualifies for this. Ruri’d definitely cook something for the nerds, though, should she be back and aware of the exact date of the start of their relationship.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Reiji. He’s a bad workaholic, but even he doesn’t come close to Shun’s mustn’t-spend-a-single-second-away-from-war-duties mentality.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidentally while cooking? - Reiji. Boy has never stepped a single foot in a kitchen before and he doesn’t really have any intention to change such habits if it isn’t for the sake of watching Shun cook.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - The Akabas’ cleaning staff.

Who is really against chores? - Again, the Akabas have people hired for practically everything, so the question is kinda redundant.

Who cleans up after the pets? - No pets for these two.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Reiji by exclusion principle.as Shun just doesn’t care about trivial matters such as cleaning and maintaining appearances in front of others That being said, this’d only occur in the case of an ‘emergency’ as otherwise, Reiji’d simply notify the cleaning staff-

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - I wouldn’t call it ‘stressing’, but… yeaaah, Reiji’d definitely give more fucks than Shun - who gives zero lol However, what kinds of guests would these two even have other than business contacts or politicians contributing to Standard’s war effort? - because no, the Lancer children certainly don’t qualify for that.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Probably Shun lol

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Reiji. When he gets Shun to join him, however, then enter and leave at the same time.

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - Again, no pets for these two.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Again something that’d only work with Ruri being there to nudge them into celebrating a holiday with her.

What are their goals for the relationship? -  Defeating Academia, killing Leo, and saving Ruri aside, it’d be: Bringing out the best in themselves and in one another; gaining a deeper understanding of themselves, one another, and their surroundings; nurturing something truly genuine and meaningful completely void of false appearances and pretenses.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Neither. Shun’s a light sleeper and Reiji’s too responsible, though… should Shun manage to collapse in his lack of talent at resting and taking proper care of himself, it could happen to him - and gosh, would this poor boy be shocked upon seeing the time ^^’ Same applies to Reiji in the case of him getting sick.

Who plays the most pranks? - Neither of them is the type for that, though if we’re talking about romantic trolling…. in that case, Reiji is the one, though Shun most definitely knows to fight back when he actually cares to.

[sassmill]

answer ALL those questions BIH 1-97 or however many there are

Great panini Michelle... every damn time...1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?Uhhhhhhhh yeah2. You talked to an ex today, correct?Idk I guess technically?3. Have you taken someones virginity?Lmao nope4. Is trust a big issue for you?YEAH WHOO BOY YEAH I have a lot of issues and trust is a huge one5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently?Yes yup I definitely did. She told me I looked pretty and it was the first time I've ever been sure she was flirting with me. 6. What are you excited for?Going back to school holy shit. I've had a countdown going. I move back in at the end of the month. I can't fuckening wait. 7. What happened tonight?I told myself I was going to shower and clean my room but instead I'm sat here watching dan and Phil games videos?8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted?I don't think it's disgusting I just worry for their safety. I'm the mom friend that takes care of the lightweights. 9. Is confidence cute?Hell yeah10. What is the last beverage you had?Brisk iced tea with lemon 11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?I wanna say like three. I don't have an exact count because I've managed to direct my daily life to have very few males and I can only think of three men I regularly interact with. 12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans?Yeah and my fuckin thighs are wearing a HOLE IN THEM which means I need to order a new pair but they're EXPENSIVE and I hate CAPITALISM 13. What are you gonna do Saturday night?That's a good fucking question. I have nothing planned, nothing to do within walking distance, and no license. Probably masturbate in all honesty. 14. What are you going to spend money on next?Well I just spent like $150 on an old navy order today so probably not clothes Oh you know what I need a new bookbag so probably that. IKEA has some good ones. 15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed?The only person I've kissed was for a scene in acting class so no. I had a really elaborate dream the other night where I was kissing my crush but alas also no. 16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months?Oh for sure. 17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?Honestly???? Reese. 18. The last time you felt broken?This is more or less a weekly to daily occurrence but the most intense instance I can recall was Saturday night at my cousin's wedding! Being most likely the only gay person out of a group of 300 people made up of mostly married couples with children was absolutely horrific because as soon as one cousin gets married the aunts start placing bets on who's next and each time I'm closer to the top of the list. Combine that with varied intrusive thoughts and you've got a lovely shitstorm of self loathing!!!19. Have you had sex today?Not ever m'dude20. Are you starting to realize anything?That if I want to be less anxious when shopping for clothing, I need to only shop at places that actually cater to my body type aka I've just accepted that I have a mom body and will always look better in well made and sort of pricey old navy clothes over cheap shitty forever 21 clothes. 21. Are you in a good mood?I'm kind of eh. All I've done today is watch the MSNBC news cycle for hours on end and that was really depressing and anxiety inducing but I've isolated myself in my room for a bit since then and had a nice salami sandwich so I've mellowed. 22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks?Hell yeah. Sharks are nowhere as violent as media portrays them and need to be protected like any other species. Also I went to the aquarium yesterday. 23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s?Yes between my parents I got pretty much all of my father's genetics and it's really funny. 24. What do you want right this second?Someone to cuddle with because I realized when I was staying at a hotel that I literally can't sleep unless I'm holding something and every single night my body pillow is a little bit more pathetic. 25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?Fuckin jokes on you she's married 26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color?Technically no. I mean I am a natural blonde but currently I am several shades blonder because my natural shade is on the darker end of the blonde spectrum and I'm so pale that I need to lighten and warm it up from time to time so I don't look like a less stylish Addams child. 27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?That's a hard fuckin pass m828. What was the last thing that made you laugh?I answered this before but I've laughed again since then soS A N D R A29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now?Yes. 30. Does everyone deserve a second chance?Yes, as long as they are actually willing to modify their behavior/habits/what have you. Life is a learning curve. I believe in third chances too, under the same conditions. At some point, however, you have to acknowledge that some people just will not change and it isn't worth the energy you're investing to try and force it. Then it's time to cut bitches off lmao. 31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to?My brother is walking a fine line right now. He's a shit head but I don't hate him. 32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?I think so. 33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?Cherry Pepsi flows through my veins. 34. Listening to?I've honestly been listening to the original London cast recording of The Witches of Eastwick the musical on repeat for like a week? That and the original cast recording of Sunset Boulevard. Which reminds me, I downloaded Dangerous Liaisons...35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore?Yeah... do people like... stop writing in pencil at some point? Y'all hate erasers????36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is?Probably somewhere in Pennsylvania where I left her. 37. Do you believe in love at first sight?Maybe chemistry at first sight? I think you have to know a person before you can love them. Chemistry doesn't have to be romantic either, I think it's just a significant reaction. I'm a fan of hate to lover arcs in fiction. Cough cough swan queen. 38. Who did you last call?Probably my brother to tell him to preheat the oven. 39. Who was the last person you danced with?My aunt when she was trying to convince me not to leave the wedding reception even though I was dead on my feet and dissociating so hard I felt like I wasn't in my body40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?Because that's how Phyllis Nagy wrote the script. 41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake?The wedding reception. It didn't have frosting because my brother brought me a fucking cupcake without frosting. 42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today?No43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?Countless times! I'm strong but clumsy so when she asks me to move things for her it's like a 50/50 chance I'll drop it. She never makes fun of me though. 44. Do you tan in the nude?I don't tan period because I am pasty and extremely at risk for skin cancer *finger guns*45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss?If by take back you mean literally take it back by purchasing the full play to read it 46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?I usually do47. Who was the last person to call you?Idk probably my dad to tell me to preheat the oven. 48. Do you sing in the shower?Am I even showering if I'm not singing49. Do you dance in the car?I'm generally pretty cramped in most cars so no50. Ever used a bow and arrow?Yes! I'm a pretty decent archer. 51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?Probably my headshots that I got when I was doing my dance photo shoot senior year. 52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?I'm a theatre major what fucking kind of question is this. In this house we respect triple threats. And have a healthy fear of the wrath of patti lupone 53. Is Christmas stressful?Half my family is EXTREMELY Roman Catholic and a quarter is Jewish so if it's not stressful it's definitely complicated 54. Ever eat a pierogi?Fuck yes holy shit we had a cooking unit at camp and they'd make staff lunch and they made pierogies from scratch like dough potatoes and all and I swear I nutted. 55. Favorite type of fruit pie?Lemon meringue. Oh fuck elies mom made such good pie last year. 56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?Forensic examiner! I wanted to do autopsies! Like deadass I wanted to be Doctor Jan Garavaglia from the discovery channel. Also retrospectively definitely had a crush on her. That was when I was in like elementary school though. In middle school I wanted nothing more than to be an Imagineer and design attractions for Disney. 57. Do you believe in ghosts?I'm from New England. Next question. 58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?Yeah holy shit I see stuff from my dreams a lot. 59. Take a vitamin daily?These strawberry flavored fuckers for hair skin and nails they're so good!60. Wear slippers?Not so much at home but at school I practically live in them because our dorm is always disgusting 61. Wear a bath robe?Yes I have a super fluffy long one62. What do you wear to bed?Ideally nothing but I have to wear clothes because my room gets too hot to sleep with the door shut so normally a t shirt and underwear and then I keep shorts or sweatpants by my bed so I can put them on quickly if I have to leave my room. Plus I have a roommate at school so no naked napping there either. 63. First concert?Probably one of the free concerts Eight to the Bar used to do in my mom's hometown64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?Target I'm a loyal Pinterest mom65. Nike or Adidas?Neither. Whatever is on clearance at Kohls. 66. Cheetos Or Fritos?Cheetos. I'm not a fucking heathen. 67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?No. Cashews. 68. Favorite Taylor Swift song?LOVE STORY (The og country version) IS THE REALEST BOP IVE EVER HEARD69. Ever take dance lessons?Hahaha only 16 years of them70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?Something creative. Strongly probably theatre related. 71. Can you curl your tongue?Yeah72. Ever won a spelling bee?No but I performed a song from The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?Short answer yes. Long answer: please see my post on Tired Thesbian about Indecent directed by Rebecca Taichman and written by Paula Vogel 74. What is your favorite book?To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf75. Do you study better with or without music?With, but it has to be instrumental. I really like film scores; Cracks, The Hours, and the Mildred Pierce miniseries are my favorites. Honorable mention for Carol. 76. Regularly burn incense?Not allowed to. 77. Ever been in love?Yes. 78. Who would you like to see in concert?Fleetwood Mac/Stevie, Celtic Woman, Dolly Parton, Florence + The Machine. That's the non showtune half of my music taste. Isn't it an unsettling combination. 79. What was the last concert you saw?I don't really go to music concerts but I went to the so you think you can dance tour a couple years ago. 80. Hot tea or cold tea?Porque no los dos 81. Tea or coffee?Porque no los dos 82. Favorite type of cookie?I'm a slut for shortbread but that's more of a biscuit soooooo Oreos. 83. Can you swim well?I've never drowned 84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?People can't do that?85. Are you patient?I guess so86. DJ or band, at a wedding?Dj BRUH 87. Ever won a contest?I won a writing contest in eighth grade!88. Ever have plastic surgery?No but I'd love to get some for various reasons. And when it comes down to it, we really shouldn't judge others cosmetic choices be they hair color or plastic surgery. Insert Dolly Parton. 89. Which are better black or green olives?Olives are evil and I was once locked out of my dorm room over this argument90. Opinions on sex before marriage?Holy fuck heterosexual culture is wild isn't it91. Best room for a fireplace?Already answered 92. Do you want to get married?Maybe not married but certainly in a committed long term relationship. To quote Lily Tomlin, I'm not particularly keen on imitating heterosexuals. Holy fuvk that took like a full hour

[sungrcwn]

✿ plots & connections.

(  w a n t e d  p l o t s  )

✿ faculty friends ✿ faculty enemies?? idk he never has enemies he’s too nice but maybe even just someone who gets annoyed by his perpetual optimism and love of hugs??  ✿ literally anyone who will gush over plants w/ him

(  c o n n e c t i o n s  )

✿ alexi nikolayevich — former teacher/mentor. topher first met alexi fourteen years ago when he arrived at stokely’s and, at the time, neither really knew how much of a task having him as a student would be. because of his learning disability and the environment in which he grew up, he was far behind his peers when it came to understanding even basic math. desperate not to flunk out and unsure of what else to do, topher stayed behind after class one day and all but begged  alexi to help him, and it was then that his teacher discovered exactly how far behind he was. but alexi tutored him, helping him with his work and giving him additional lessons several times a week, and it’s thanks to his generosity and perseverance that topher was able to graduate. and to this day, he still has endless gratitude ( which he often shows in the form of fresh fruit he offers to him when he drops in and lush gardens that grow outside of his classroom ) and credits him as the reason he didn’t fail in his very first year.

✿ thea rowlett — close friend. one of his very best friends on the faculty, in fact. topher and thea share a friendship that was initially sparked by a common interest and a shared medium for their abilities — plants. thea seemed to be one of the few people who didn’t look at topher like he was completely absurd for suggesting that plants had feelings, and the two of them often shared their own feelings about people ripping up or defoliating or otherwise harming the flora that surrounds the campus and sharing stories about their lives over tea in the greenhouse. the energy that thea pulls from the plants in order to heal is easily replenished by topher’s green thumb, ensuring that the plants fulfill their needs to the staff and student body without suffering or wilting, a balance that leads to a healthy ecosystem of plant life and a healthy school. topher, able to communicate with plants thanks to his own botanical gifts, often assures thea that the plants she tends to do not, in fact, hate her for draining their energy ( and it’s true — he would know, they’ve told him. )

✿ callum saxon — close friend. in spite of the fact that the subject he teaches is one that topher himself has never been any good at ( the fact that he even managed to pass history when he was attending stokely’s was a feat in and of itself ) callum has quickly become one of his best friends among the faculty for their mutual passion for the school itself. they share a similar past — one that, while it may have been difficult, has left the both of them with an appreciation for stokely’s not only as an educational facility but as a home, a place of belonging. and it’s a feeling that the both of them only want to support and encourage with every new class of kids that comes in. both rather outdoorsy types, it’s not uncommon to find the two of them out around campus, whether orchestrating impromptu games of lawn twister or capture the flag out on the green for students or simply enjoying nature and the company of a friend. 

✿ kat willows — close friend. topher and kat have been friends for several years now and he considers the infinitely youthful blonde one of his best and closest. their friendship, like several others of his, was sparked initially through a mutual love for plants and nature; the pair of them could spend hours simply wandering around in the gardens waxing poetic about all the different blossoms and petals that line them, pointing out their favorite colors in the bright clusters of flowers. topher will sometimes watch her kitten, vinny, while kat is in class, and after several hours of conjuring up vines for him to chase or watching him leap through the air to try and catch butterflies, she’ll often find the pair of them napping in the shade of one of the apricot trees in the orchard, the gardener sprawled out in the grass while vinny dozes contentedly on his chest, the both of them worn out from a morning of adventures.

✿ charlant leroux — friend/slight crush. he’ll admit, for someone whose company he enjoys so thoroughly, topher doesn’t see charlant as much as his happy little heart would hope. he finds the drama teacher to be incredibly interesting, and he looks forward to the conversations they share for how unique and stimulating they are ( without charlant, after all, topher never would have even known that little shop of horrors existed, and even if it does vilify the plant in the end, he can’t lie and say he isn’t absolutely tickled by the ridiculous plot and musical numbers. the first time the blond had mentioned it, he spent that evening watching the 1986 film rendition ) even going so far as to seek him out at times if for nothing else than the chance to speak to him. charlant may be prone to rambling, but topher honestly finds it more endearing than anything and greatly enjoys listening to his frequently tangential talks. and his smile, y’know, that’s pretty nice too. 

✿ rory damiani — friend. perhaps one of the only things topher enjoys more than plants? food. it makes sense, then, that one of his favorite friendships is one that was formed with a bond forged over french fries. she’d offered to share with him the first time they’d met — an offer he would later come to find out was rare for the girl who often had others do for her instead of the other way around — and he’d be a liar if he tried to say they haven’t been friends ever since. topher likes to do little things for her, whether it be weaving her flower crowns from brightly colored blooms he’s taken from his garden or sharing fresh fruit with her, tiny reminders that she doesn’t have to use her powers in order for others to be compelled to do things for her. he genuinely believes that rory is a sweet girl, as much as he thinks that she doubts it herself ( and he does think that, if for no other reason than her occasional asking if he really does consider her a friend. )

✿ janicka rush-schäfer — friend. or kindred spirit, more like. the first time topher crossed paths with janicka, he’d been climbing one of the many trees that scattered the campus ( a pastime he indulged in often — particularly when he could manipulate the growth of the branches to be the perfect width and distance apart for maximum climbing and lounging in the treetops ) when he’d discovered that the specific oak he’d chosen already had an inhabitant. though he loves all of the students at the school — he loves everybody, really — janicka has been one of his favorites for their shared love of plants and climbing trees, so much so that he’s even shared with her some of his favorite spots in the orchard to hide away amidst the branches. he finds her power to be absolutely fascinating, and on more than one occasion, she’s conjured up a drizzle to help hydrate the gardens during dry spells in the weather, a favor for which he is always immensely grateful. 

✿ huan zhang — frustration. let it be known that topher has the patience of a saint and it takes a lot to frustrate him, but there is one particular student he’s found seems to take joy in drowning his plants and it breaks his heart to know she gets a kick out of harming such helpless, innocent life. at first, he’d simply written it off as an uncontrollable side effect of her powers — it isn’t uncommon, after all, for students to accidentally wreck his flowerbeds or knock over trees or light his topiaries on fire as they’re learning to control their abilities — but the more it happens ( and the more interest she seems to take in it, asking after his plants while he’s actively trying to revive them ) the more he’s starting to realize that maybe his flooded gardens are not as much an accident as he’d hoped. he isn’t confrontational, not by any means, but he can’t help but feel a desire to ask her why. 

✿ elliot ricker — friend. the shapeshifter is known to be a bit of a prankster around campus, and topher is certainly not immune to her jokes and games. the best, she’s come to realize, is when she disguises herself hides herself among his plants in the garden or in the greenhouse, only to shift back into her natural form when he’s least expecting it and scare the living daylights out of him. she often teases him for holding conversations with and singing to his plants ( something the groundskeeper does unabashedly no matter the audience, but admittedly with a bit more zeal when he thinks that he’s alone ) but it’s always all in good fun and topher has no problem laughing along with her, even if the jokes usually are at his expense. 

✿ landon hightower — frustration. much like the girl who takes pleasure in drowning his plants, one of the main reasons topher knows of landon is for how his abilities have affected the gardens and greenery around the school. unfortunately, whereas he can revive a plant whose roots have been flooded with water, from what he can tell, landon is capable of destroying matter entirely, and once he’s killed his plants, topher is unable to revive them, instead forced to re-fertilize the soil and grow entirely anew. given his power, this isn’t a particularly difficult feat, as he can often repair and replace the damage fairly quickly, but it’s the emotional impact of it that gets him. he talks to the plants, communicates with and cares for them — they’re his friends, his family, and it can be devastating to watch them be destroyed. he’s yet to figure out if the boy has any sort of malicious intent ( for what reason, he couldn’t imagine ) or if he’s simply unable to control such a powerful ability, so as of now, all he can do is mourn the loss and plant new gardens. 

( @deadsculs | @thearowlett | @nodustollcns | @prditflorem | @raconteurfoo | @cosancstra | @riotousgiirl | @ancrchist | @conflicticn | @fightingbruises )

[njawaidofficial]

Hollywood Job Envy: Entertainment's Most Powerful Reveal Who They'd Trade Places With for a Day

http://styleveryday.com/2017/07/06/hollywood-job-envy-entertainments-most-powerful-reveal-who-theyd-trade-places-with-for-a-day/

Hollywood Job Envy: Entertainment's Most Powerful Reveal Who They'd Trade Places With for a Day

While multiple members of 2017’s THR 100 said they’d like to switch seats with Bob Iger — “CEO of Happiness,” according to Oprah Winfrey — and The Rock, admired in part for his “great calves,” others are content to stay in their own powerful positions.

They’re the 100 most powerful people in entertainment but that doesn’t mean they don’t dream about trading places with someone else in Hollywood. Asked whose job they would want — just for one day — the execs, creators and stars who made the cut for this year’s THR 100 offered a wide variety of answers, with a few notable repeats.

Bob Iger, himself No. 1 on the THR 100, was the most popular pick, with five of the interviewees wanting to take his job as CEO of Disney for the day; Oprah Winfrey (No. 9) even called him the “CEO of Happiness.” AMC’s Charlie Collier (No. 42) cited Iger’s “breadth of perspective,” with Simon Kinberg (No. 59) and Brian Grazer (No. 95) expressing similar sentiments. Mark Burnett (No. 54) summed it up more simply: “Bob Iger. This needs no explanation.”

Netflix’s Ted Sarandos (No. 2) was named by both Fox’s Dana Walden (No.16) “so that I could see Netflix’s ratings,” she said, and Ava DuVernay (No. 70), who mentioned the chief content officer’s disruptor role in Hollywood and “those deep pockets.” As for Sarandos, he’d switch places for a day with Lorne Michaels (No. 38); same goes for Michaels’ corporate boss, NBCUniversal CEO Steve Burke (No. 3).

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson (No. 34) also got a couple of mentions — from Brett Ratner (No. 9), who admires the star’s “great calves,” and Jordan Peele (No. 93). Wonder Woman helmer Patty Jenkins (No. 94) chose Clint Eastwood (No. 63) — “he has such a great and impressive body of work that now he really gets to do what he wants to do,” she said — as did one of her collaborators on the DC summer blockbuster, Warner Bros.’ Jon Berg (No. 64). “Who wouldn’t want to be Clint for one day?” Berg told THR. “I’d just keep giving myself his patented ‘what you looking at’ stare.”

Also receiving multiple mentions were two powerhouses who didn’t appear on THR’s list: Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos was chosen by Illumination’s Chris Meledandri (No. 29) and Starz’s Chris Albrecht (No. 60). And Jay-Z was the choice of both UTA’s Jeremy Zimmer and TBS/TNT president Kevin Reilly, who quipped of the hip hop star and mogul, “We’re very similar.”

Read on for the full list of responses.

Ted Sarandos, chief creative officer, Netflix (No. 2) “He is in New York, but I would switch jobs with Lorne Michaels (No. 38) for a day anytime.”

Steve Burke, CEO, NBCUniversal, and senior executive vp, Comcast Corp. (No. 3) “Lorne Michaels (No. 38).”

Leslie Moonves, president and CEO, CBS Corp. (No. 4) “Charlie Rose.”

James Murdoch, CEO, 21st Century Fox (No. 5) “Jason Momoa for the tomahawks and Guinness.”

Lachlan Murdoch, executive chairman, 21st Century Fox (No. 5) “One of our National Geographic photographers or cinematographers, whose work I think is consistently awesome.”

Bob Bakish, president/CEO, Viacom (No. 6) “[Universal Music Group CEO] Lucian Grainge. I always loved music and still do.”

Oprah Winfrey, CEO, OWN (No. 9) “Bob Iger (No. 1), CEO of Happiness.”

Peter Rice, chairman/CEO, Fox Networks Group (No. 10) “A National Geographic photographer — Paul Nicklen”

Emma Watts, vice chairman and president of production, 20th Century Fox Film (No. 12) “Skip Brittenham”

Dana Walden, CEO/chairman, Fox TV Group (No. 16) “Ted Sarandos (No. 2), so that I could see Netflix’s ratings.”

Gary Newman, CEO/chairman, Fox TV Group (No. 16) “I would like to work as an executive producer of one of our series to understand the pressures of that job and see whether studio and network input is helping or hurting.”

John Lasseter, chief creative officer, Walt Disney and Pixar Animation Studios (No. 17) “I think I have the best job in Hollywood, so I would switch with a ride operator at the Jungle Cruise at Disneyland … which is the best job in the world.”

Jon Feltheimer, CEO, Lionsgate Entertainment (No. 20) “I wouldn’t.”

Bonnie Hammer, chairman, NBCUniversal Cable Entertainment (No. 21) “Maitre d’ at one of the top industry restaurants. Imagine the relationships you’d forge, the stories you’d hear, your control over the pecking order! Talk about power!”

Ben Sherwood, co-chairman, Disney Media Networks and President, Disney/ABC TV Group (No. 22) “Dave Roberts, manager of the Dodgers. Go Blue!”

Richard Plepler, CEO, HBO (No. 23) “Jimmy Iovine. Nobody’s living better than Jimmy.”

John Landgraf, CEO, FX Networks (No. 24) “My present self in this same job 10 years ago — now that I know how easy the job used to be…”

Tony Vinciquerra, chairman/CEO, Sony Pictures Entertainment (No. 26) “I just did that!”

Tom Rothman, Chairman, Motion Picture Group, Sony Pictures Entertainment (No. 26) “Is this a trick question? Hello, Leo (No. 39).”

Robert Greenblatt, chairman, NBC (No. 27) “John Lasseter (No. 17).”

Jennifer Salke, president, NBC (No. 27) “To be working in the writers room on This is Us. I just love it so much and everyone involved.”

Paul Telegdy, alternative & reality, NBC Entertainment (No. 27) “Chris Meledandri (No. 29) — I think I could learn a lot from him in a day.”

Ryan Murphy, writer/producer (No. 28) “The person who does the topiaries on the Fox lot. That’s a great gig, and my kids would be so impressed. They are obsessed with those topiaries. And I used to be a gardening designer.”

Chris Meledandri, CEO, Illumination Entertainment (No. 29) “Jeff Bezos — just to see the world through his eyes.”

David Kramer, managing director, United Talent Agency (No. 33) “Samantha Bee. I’d be brilliant, hilarious, and my teenage daughters would worship me.”

Jeremy Zimmer, CEO, United Talent Agency (No. 33) “Jay-Z. I would enjoy having his perspective and impact on pop culture.”

David Nevins, CEO, Showtime Networks (No. 36) “Terry Gross or Howard Stern. I’d like to ask them questions.”

Jason Blum, founder/CEO, Blumhouse Productions (No. 40) “Richard Plepler (No. 23).”

Josh Sapan, president/CEO, AMC Networks (No. 42) “Vince Gilligan and Peter Gould. I would pray that some of their talent and generosity found its way to me.”

Charlie Collier, president/GM, AMC (No. 42) “Bob Iger (No. 1). What breadth of perspective.”

Ellen DeGeneres, talk show host/producer (No. 43) “Whoever has to wake up The Bachelor contestants every morning. I bet that’d be a real sight to see.”

Scott Stuber, vp original film, Netflix (No. 45) “John Williams. I lack musical talent and I would love to be inside the head of someone who has elevated so many films with his brilliance.”

Greg Berlanti, writer/producer (No. 52) “A young staff writer on any show. I loved being a baby writer when all I had to worry about was the script I was working on.”

Mary Parent, vice chair, worldwide productions, Legendary Entertainment (No. 53) “Anything related to reality TV, which I love. Casting director or editor ideally.”

David Zaslav, president/CEO, Discovery Communications (No. 56) “Ron Meyer (No. 11), because I’d know what it feels like to be loved by everyone.”

Gary Barber, chairman/CEO (No. 54) “Sports agent.”

Mark Burnett, president, TV and digital group, MGM (No. 54) “Bob Iger (No. 1). This needs no explanation.”

Kevin Reilly, president, TNT/TBS, and chief creative officer, Turner (No. 58) “Jay-Z (we’re very similar).”

Simon Kinberg, writer/producer (No. 59) “Bob Iger (No. 1). ESPN, Star Wars and Disneyland in a day.”

Mark Pedowitz, president, The CW (No. 60) “I wouldn’t switch jobs with anyone, I have the best job around.”

Chris Albrecht, CEO, Starz (No. 61) “Jeff Bezos.”

Diane Nelson, president, DC Entertainment (No. 64)  “Patty Jenkins (No. 94). To feel demand for your talent, regardless of gender, and knowing you are creating films that are going to leave lifetime imprints.”

Jon Berg, co-president, production and development, Warner Bros. Pictures (No. 64) “Clint Eastwood (No. 63). Who wouldn’t want to be Clint for one day? I’d just keep giving myself his patented ‘what you looking at’ stare.”

Geoff Johns, president/chief creative officer, DC Entertainment (No. 64) “Working on bringing DC’s heroes and villains to the screen is the greatest job I could’ve dreamed of. But if it was one day… I would pull a Freaky Friday with Stephen Spielberg (No. 32) so I could read the new Indiana Jones script, get the new Gremlins movie greenlit and have lunch with Harrison Ford.”

Adam Fogelson, chairman, STXFilms Motion Picture Group (No. 66) “Chris Pratt (No. 89).”

Tyler Perry, actor/producer and CEO, Tyler Perry Studios (No. 67) “Kathy Griffin, on the day she took the photo with Trump’s head so I could have talked her out of it.”

Zack Van Amburg, president, U.S. programming and production, Sony Pictures TV (No. 69) “Ari Emmanuel (No. 13). He says what he means, is fearless, hard-charging, and is a voracious reader. Plus, I’d get to tell agents what to do instead of the other way around!”

Ava DuVernay, director/producer (No. 70) “Ted Sarandos (No. 2). I’d like to know how it feels to be the industry’s biggest disruptor and have those deep pockets too. I’d make it a shopping day.”

Kelly Kahl, entertainment president, CBS (No. 71) “Stephen Colbert or James Corden.”

Thom Sherman, senior executive vp programming, CBS (No. 71) “Jim Nantz.”

Noah Hawley, writer/producer (No. 76) “Wes Anderson. He just looks like he has so much fun. There’s something to the level of playfulness and just really chasing something that’s in his head that seems disconnected from any kind of note process. Plus, doesn’t he live in Paris? It’s like a whole thing.”

Kevin Hart, actor/comedian (No. 80) “If I could take anybody’s job, I’d take my job. I love what I do. I don’t want to do anything else.”

Shawn Levy, director/producer (No. 81) “Literally no one. I love my job.”

Brett Ratner, CEO, RatPac Entertainment (No. 82) “Dwayne Johnson (No. 34). He has great calves.”

Jeff Skoll, founder, Participant Media (No. 83) “The fellow who welcomes people onto the Universal studio lot.”

David Linde, CEO, Participant Media (No. 83) “My assistant.”

Steve Harvey, talk show host/producer (No. 84) “I’d choose Peter Roth (No. 72), the head of Warner Brothers, and then I’d greenlight every show I ever took to him.”

Dan Fogelman, writer/producer (No. 88) “Milo Ventimiglia. It’d be nice to have that ass for a day.”

Jordan Peele, filmmaker/producer/actor (No. 93) “The Rock (No.34).”

Patty Jenkins, director (No. 94) “Clint Eastwood (No. 63). Seems like he has such a great and impressive body of work that now he really gets to do what he wants to do, and is supported in it. What an ultimate dream and goal.”

Brian Grazer, partner, Imagine Entertainment (No. 95) “Bob Iger (No. 1), for sure. I don’t think I’m the guy to do it on a full-time basis, but it would be really really interesting to just see, feel and/or touch all the different businesses that he has expertise on.”

Barry Jenkins, writer/director (No. 97) “My lawyer, Jamie Feldman. He just seems like he’s always having fun.”

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